#cheeseburgerinparadise

[quietanddistantandremorseful]

Today's idiocy: Trying to Reason with Monotreme Season (One Song to the Tune of Another)

Today's burst of idiocy:

Singing the words of the Perry the Platypus theme to a couple Jimmy Buffett riffs.

The verse lyric kind of fits the "Fins" verse melody.

"He's Perry the Platypus" fits the first measure of "Cheeseburger in Paradise"'s chorus.

[iamtommytheroach]

I'm coming back here. 🍔 #hawaiianstyle #hawaiian #macsalad #cheeseburgerinparadise #bbqcheeseburger (at Island Ono Loa Grill) https://www.instagram.com/p/CpJqWgfLIbl/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[housefreak]

anyone else's tummy hurt #cheeseburgerinparadise

[varshinimusic123]

Cheeseburger in Paradise Jimmy Buffett acoustic cover

In this video, I am covering the song, Cheeseburger in Paradise by Jimmy Buffett :) #JimmyBuffett #CheeseburgerinParadise #cover LIKE | SHARE | SUBSCRIBE | RING THE BELL 🎵***************RELATED VIDEOS***************🎵 Music Covers:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9DT3f15qeAs&list=PLBKZEv1RVHbrqvurOpM1YT3qR47O_HYnG Acoustic Covers:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p722CXyMNYI&list=PLBKZEv1RVHbrzg0cGODD3PxZLq_xNSAbW Guitar Covers:https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLBKZEv1RVHboWDxnHOJB8u8kaXFn9XLf9 🌏**********SOCIAL MEDIA ACCOUNTS**********🌏 ✅ Instagram:Varshini Vijayakumar https://www.instagram.com/varshinivijayakumar123/ ✅ Facebook: Varshini Vijayakumar https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100063549962286 ✅  Twitter: Varshini Vijayakumar https://twitter.com/Varshini_123

[dedskul]

Trashbags In Paradise

I have to admit that I am a hoarder, just not in the physical sense.

My home isn't filled to the brim with my belongings or layered chest deep with trash.

I'm an emotional hoarder.

The inside of my head is busting at the seams with memories, emotions, thoughts, and un-answered prayers.

I don't throw anything away, I just keep it all in piles.

Shame, hurt, pain, remorse, guilt, anger, fear.

It's overwhelming, confusing.

There's no organization, just mass piles of raw emotions and memories hasty thrown into black trash bags and scatted around my brain like a landfill.

To some this may seem like a problem, something in need of attention and time.

Clear it all out

Make space for new things

But I can't

I like it here too much to let it go

I love my hazardous waste filled head

I love to creep around the dump in my brain and carefully open up those trash bags.

I'll slowly untie one with my trembling hands and breath in deep as the rotten smell of desperation seeps into my nostrils.

I'll dip my arms inside and welcome the hot, sweaty embrace of anxiety as I dig though the contents.

What do we want to relive tonight?

How about one of the classics?

The night with a gun in my hands

Loading it, unloading it.

Firing it into the air a few times.

Screaming at the top of my lungs for help.

Loading it a final time

Putting it to my head, and pulling the trigger.

I could have sworn the agony I felt that night when that gun jammed was more painful than a bullet going though my skull....

Nah, too overdone.

Doesn't have the same punch it used too.

What about some good ol' abandonment?

Dad throwing his hands in the air and giving up

"I hope you like the color orange cause you're going to end up in jail, or dead."

Mom kicking me in the dead of night

"If you wanna kill yourself so bad go and do it, but you're not going to do it under my roof!"

Spending Christmas day alone, handing over my last dollar for a spring roll with tears in my eyes.

Savoring every bite.

I swear I'd never felt so lonely, so hated, so unwanted...

Nope, that's too sad

Too weak

I need something really painful

Something that will hurt good and deep

Something I can lay down and cover myself in

Something that will make my eyes water, my hand twitch, my heart pump

Something I can replay over and over and over again

Slow it down, speed it up

Pause it and lay in it all night

Until I can't feel anything else

Until I can feel it all

Until I can feel everything and nothing in the same breath

Let it overtake me

Let it trick me into thinking its happening again

Let it sit on top of me until I can barely breathe

Until my ribs feel like they will snap under the pressure if I hold it on top of me for a second more

And then then leave it there for hours

When I finally get up and put whatever vile thing I let grip me all night back where it came from

When I tie the black bag back up and toss it away with the hundreds of others

When I stand on my shaking legs

Literally holding myself together with my arms

I always have the same thought

This isn't good for me

This isn't right

I don't have to torture myself like this

Reliving violence, abandonment, embarrassment, childhood trauma

It's not doing anything but making it worse

But I can't stop

Outside of this trash heap I don't feel anything at all

I'm numb

An all consuming type of numb that gnaws soul and barricades my heart

It sucks everything up and deprives me of even the most basic of emotions

It forces me to open these bags

Because just to feel something, anything else, even if it hurts, is better than the emptiness I'm forced to deal with every day

But it's like an addiction

I can't get enough

Things that used to do the trick and hurt me long and good now only feel like pin pricks

My tolerance is too high

Nowadays I have to dig though 4, 5, or even 6 different bags to feel the pain I need to overtake the numbness

I'm not very nice to myself

I treat myself worse than the people who gave me these bags to begin with

Why do I always have to be the bad guy?

Why can't I look at myself in the mirror and say something nice?

I need a break

I need to let parts of me out that I've punished and berated

Let them breathe

Let them talk

I walk around the trash heap looking for Little April

The small, long-haired tomboy dressed in boy clothes

I come across a structure dimly-lit among the garbage

A fort, built with smaller bags and well worn blankets

I peek inside and see her there

Playing with a GI-Joe action figure cause everyone knows he's way cooler than Barbie

She has headphones on that are way too big

They play a repeat of Jimmy Buffet songs cause she has dreams of living on an island, in a paradise, far far away

I step inside the fort as Little April shivers away

She's scared of us now, I only bring her out to hurt her but this time will be different

“It's okay, I'm not here to hurt you this time. I promise.”

I say as I pull out a stuffed monkey

“Bananas!” Little April lights up as I hand over the stuffed animal

“Bananas didn't come down here with you because I had to keep him.” I explain. “I still like him a lot too.”

Little April smiles as I reach for her hand

“Come on Kiddo, I have a surprise for you.”

The two of us start walking, hand in hand, looking for our missing piece

Eventually, what seems like miles away, I start seeing the signs

Black trash bags covered in dust, ripped open with knifes

Remnants of old, tarnished memories leak out the slices in the bags and gum up the floor

Little April is struggling, her light up Furby shoes can't withstand the muck

I offer a piggyback ride and put her on my back

She's around here somewhere

We have to find her

Further though the messy gunk and overfilled crap I start to hear heavy metal music blaring in the distance

She's close

Little April tenses up and pulls the monkey over her eyes

I don't blame her, Teenage April isn't the best

I clump together bags to give Little April a solid place to stand

She climbs off my back, still scared

“I know Teenage April is scary. But I know something about her that you don't. It's a secret that nobody else knows.” I say, taking a knee.

“What?” Little April whispers

“She likes Jimmy Buffet too. Sing with me.”

“I like mine with lettuce and tomato...” I start

“Heinz 57 and French fried potatoes...” Little April sings

“Big kosher pickle and a cold draft beer...” We sing together

Footsteps, the jingle of chains, the smell of cheap, truck stop cigarettes

“Well, good God Almighty which way do I steer?” A voice grumbles from the darkness.

Teenage April dressed in all back, head to toe

I can barely even see her, camouflaged, she blends into the background, just where she likes it

Little April hugs my legs as Teenage April steps closer

Fake chains, handcuffs, and razor-blades garnish her body as accessorizes

Better to scare other people away so they can't get close

“What do you two want?” She spits, angry at our obvious summoning

“We're here too help.” I say, reaching for her perpetually clasped fist

She swats my hand away, she's just as scared as Little April but is better at hiding it

“I don't need help from a child and a freak.” Teenage April says, lighting a menthol between her lips

“What makes you think I'm a freak?” I ask, taken aback by her sudden attack on me

“I've seen you! I've seen you over there, out in the open. You pick up the heaviest bags in here and you bathe in it. You let it smother you! You pile on more and more every-time. You actually like it in here, you fucking freak! She's seen you too, she knows what I'm talking about.”

Little April nods slowly up and down

“It's weird.” She finally says.

“I'm sorry you two had to see that.” I sigh. “But I'm not going to do that anymore. I'm going to get the two of you out of here.”

“Out?” Teenage April asks

“Yes out!”

I look over at Little April

“There is a place outside of here that is like a paradise. You can do whatever you want! You have your own house, your own money, your own car...you can do anything there!” Little April bounces up and down with excitement.

I turn to Teenage April

“It's a place where you're loved. A place people listen to you. A place you share with the girl of your dreams who kisses you goodnight and knows all your favorite songs. Isn't that what you want?”

“I guess....”

“Then let's go! Grab your bag!”

“Which bag?” Teenage April scoffs.

“The heaviest one, the one you came here with.” I say.

“Fine.”

Teenage April leaves and comes back with a well-maintained trash bag. I can tell the weight is a lot, her arms are straining, her knuckles white.

The trio of us walk back though the landfill eventually passing back by Little April's fort.

“Go get your bag too.” I demand

Little April emerges from her fort gripping a tiny bag by the end and pulling it with all her weight trying to get it to move

The two of them look at me with shock as I pick up both bags with the greatest of ease.

“Don't open it!” They both scream in unison

“I'm not. Give me your lighter April.”

Teenage April reluctantly passes me a black Bic lighter

I flick it and hold it to the bags

They light immediately, filling the landfill with smoke

“This place is going to go up in flames real soon. I'm going to burn it to the ground. Even if we do have to come back here, it won't hurt us anymore.” I gather us around the burning bags as we hold each-others hands.

The bags ignite the others around us.

Memories flood the air

The three of us shutter as some of them scream

“HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME!"

"ARPIL YOU'RE HURTING ME!"

"STOP WHINEING!"

Disembodied voices stir around us

I grab a tight hold of the different versions of myself and sing loud enough to distract them

“At night I'd have these wonderful dreams, some kind of sensuous treat, not zucchini fettuccine or Bulgur wheat, but a big warm bun and a huge hunk of meat!”

“Cheeseburger in paradise!” The three of us sing together

“Heaven on Earth, with an onion slice. Not too particular, not too precise...”

The flames and voices reach a crescendo as I hug the the two April's as close to me as I can and close my eyes

“I'm just a cheeseburger in paradise.”

I open my eyes

No other April's

No fire

No bags

I'm in my apartment, my safe space, my home

“What was that honey?” My girlfriend asks stepping out of the other room

“Ummmm.... what?” I ask, confused.

“You mumbled something about a cheeseburger? Are you hungry? You wanna go get something to eat?” She asks.

I stand and give her a big kiss.

“Yes.” I say. “That sounds great.”

I grab my car keys as we walk out the door

“You don't mind if we listen to some Jimmy Buffet in the car do you?” I ask.

“I'm in the mood for it today.”

My girlfriend laughs.

“Of course not! Listen to whatever you want.”

I play the song as we pull out the parking lot

“Tried to amend my carnivorous habit, made it nearly 70 days...” The stereo plays

I reach over the arm-rest barrier separating me from the love of my life and place my hand on her leg

I smile the biggest my face will allow and grip the wheel

Tonight, I'm going to eat a cheeseburger in my own paradise.

I feel Little April and Teenage April light up inside of me at the very thought

Who knew being nice to yourself could be this easy?

[voorhees1138]

One of thee best restaurants I've ever ate at!. So good, can't wait to go back. 🍺🍟🍔👌🏻 #blessedlife #stateandmain #cheeseburgerinparadise #fries🍟 #fridaynightvibes #letseat #fridaynight #letsdothis #burgersofinstagram #burgerandfries #fries🍟 #friesofinstagram #yummy #foodlovers #foodpicoftheday #foodstarz #guelphontario #eatingout #restaurant #🍔 #🍔🍟 #🍟🍟🍟 #southend #tablefor3 #eatingfortheinsta #eatingclean #bestburgers (at State & Main) https://www.instagram.com/p/Cfzb_RnOqzd/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[marissafonte]

It’s summer !! ☀️🌴The Guy and I are “parrot heads”. You’ll likely catch us blasting Jimmy Buffett all season… or even likelier, all year 🎶 . . . #summervibes #summer #summer2021 #vaccinatedandhappy #jimmybuffett #parrot #parrothead #parrotheads #music #margaritaville #cheeseburgerinparadise #art #artistsoninstagram #artist #instaart #instartist #illustration #characterdesign #characterart #characterillustration #photoshop #laartist #boyfriend #couplegoals #relationshipgoals #fans #fanart #vaccinated #fun #sun https://www.instagram.com/p/CQZF54QDxM1/?utm_medium=tumblr

[jaquandor]

Now THIS is most definitely my "When the celiac cat's away, the mice will play" thing: a visit to Wendy's. #yum #cheeseburger #CheeseburgerInParadise https://www.instagram.com/p/CQR81t4LLUM/?utm_medium=tumblr

[cowboytrey]

The Sweet Heat Possum burger from @muddbones in Bonham Tx. #chowwithtrey #SupportLocal #ChefDriven #burgers #BurgersWithTrey #burgersandfries #cheeseburger #cheesey #cheese #burgerporn #biggestburgers101 #burgerspecial #cheeseburgers #cheeseburgerinparadise (at Muddbones) https://www.instagram.com/p/CBknVUqHfvV/?igshid=claslansu9id

[julie-toons]

[lahainagalleries]

Flip-flops required! 🤣 take a stroll along Front Street in the “Heart of Lahaina” in oil by Ronaldo Macedo. 18x24 - to inquire email is at Info@Lgimaui.com - - - - #lahaina #maui #hawaiilife #frontstreet #beachlife #lahainagalleries #cheeseburgerinparadise #pleinair #pleinairpainting (at Lahaina Galleries, Lahaina) https://www.instagram.com/p/BshD-d2H3RH/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1ejcw683hg5mm

[dnomader]

Always a solids burger at Green Tamarind Kitchen. 🍔😋 #cheeseburger #burger #cheeseburgers #burgers #burgerporn #burgerlover #burgertime #burgerlife #burgerlovers #burgerlove #cheeseburgerinparadise #food #foodporn #foodie #foodblogger #foodphotography #foodart #foodlove #foodaddict #foodcoma #foodlife #cheese #foodphoto #foodshare #travel #travelblogger #foodheaven #phuket #phuketthailand #bacon (at Green Tamarind Kitchen) https://www.instagram.com/p/Cgrg78zpAR2/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[gutrot]

Put up a new design on my Threadless store. Cheeseburgers at Hedonism II, yee haw! This was a commission by my guy @rorytn and it's available on tees, tanks, beach towels, rugs, and so on and so on. I also made a story post calling for nen bleach-dyed tees. If you see anything on the Threadless shop you'd like as a bleach dye, let me know by 5/27 and I'll order one to do up for ya. #Gutrot #threadless #threadlessartistshops #tees #pinacoladaberg #margaritaville #margarita #drunkenclam #cheeseburgerinparadise #partytime https://www.instagram.com/p/Cd_UUcKFF4h/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[johnmasseyjr]

All the proper condiments for a pre- @margaritavilleatsea dinner! #finsup #margaritaville #jimmybuffett #margaritavilleatsea #cheeseburger #cheeseburgerinparadise #wearethepeopleourparentswarnedusabout #growingolderbutnotup https://www.instagram.com/p/Cc_yR2SJ1tD/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[christine16xoxo]

We made 'Homemade Cheeseburgers' for dinner the other day. ❤️❤️🧡🍔🐈🧡❤️❤️ Tilly was my 'Special Little Helper'. She was quite 'Meow-mazed' & 'Meow-merized, with the process & the 'Finished Product'. ❤️❤️ She said: "Mommy we did a good job. That 'Cheeseburger' almost 'Looks Too Good To Eat'....... or is it 'Too Pretty Too Eat'..... maybe it's both. Hehe 😸🧡 Okay Mommy let's 'Dig In'." ❤️❤️😸❤️❤️ I did let Tilly have a 'Teeny Tiny' bite; but in the end she always prefers 'Licking The Pots, Pans, & Plates Clean'. .......don't worry I always 'Rewash' her "Clean Dishes" & 'Then Run Them Through The Dishwasher'. Lol 😸🧡🍔 Just in case. Lol hehe 😸❤️ You got to be safe. 💜 🧡❤️❤️🍄🐈❤️❤️🧡 Even 'Big Sister Hula' & 'Daddy James' joined in on the fun. Hula was only allowed to have a 'Itty-bitty' piece of 'Cheese' since 'She Is Allergic To Beef'. However, she L🧡VES 'CHEESE' so she didn't mind going without the 'BEEF'. 😺 🧡🧡🧡❤️😸❤️🧡🧡🧡 All four of us, Hula, Tilly Billie, Daddy James, & I had so much fun cooking together & then eating dinner together in front of a little olde classic movie called: 'Uncle Buck'. 😸 🧡🍄🍔🧡 'Time spent with family really is time well spent.' We can't wait to make 'Cheeseburgers' again; but we are most excited about the 'Easter Foods' that are coming up soon. We are Polish so we will be 'Eating High On The Hog' & exquisitely well all day long....... & then we'll eat dinner. 😸❤️ 'Mmmmm mmmm Good' & 'Scrumptiously Scrumdiddlyumptious', 'We Can Hardly Wait!' 😺❤️ ❤️❤️🧡🌷🐈🧡❤️❤️ Sincerely, Christine & Family (From Our Instagram) Thursday, March 31, 2022 🧡🧡❤️🍄🐈❤️🧡🧡 #cats #cat #catsofinsta #catsoginstagram #orangecatsofinstagram #calicocatsofinstagram #greycatsofinstagram #seniorcats #rescuecats #meow #petsofinstagram #petsoftheworld #pets #mycat #Cheeseburgers #cheeseburger #cheeseburgerinparadise #purrpurrpurr #happycats #purr #hungrygirl #hungrycats #littlecats #babycat #girlsthateat #homemade #cookingtogether #cooking #justagirl #adoptedpets https://www.instagram.com/p/CbxtTXIppL5/?utm_medium=tumblr

[geekbroll]

Tonight I watched Theo from Die Hard, Clarence Gilyard Jr., as a singing cheeseburger on Riptide S02E08 It's a Vial Sort of Business.    #TheQuarterbackIsToast #riptide #riptide1984 #clarencegilyard #clarencegilyardjr #Oscars #joepenny #thombray #perryking #nickandcody #nickryder #codyallen #theboz #boz #MurrayBozinsky #singinghamburger #singingcheeseburger #singingtelegram #cheeseburgerinparadise #vintagetv #vintagetelevision #diehard #theofromdiehard      (at Portland, Oregon) https://www.instagram.com/p/CbouwLQOd40/?utm_medium=tumblr