#cant say that doesnt hurt
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Part of me feels like i legit have a chance at growth towards something I've desired for a while, and like you're just whispering a whole bunch of stuff in her ear. It's so hard to trust you.
And why should I?
Do you think you're trust worthy?
Do you think you're an adult?
You got me feeling stupid paranoid
And you're moving funny enough to a point where it's starting to feel not so crazy to indulge those delusions
#posting about mean girls energy is so fucking funny from you lol#go have fun with your new friends#youre not pretending anymore#you are plastic#yeah you are aloud to just be done with thingsb#whenever you want#just like the drop of a hat#but then everything that followed#super sus#put a big sweet sugar coating on it#no we're still friends#its just that when it comes to time and effort concearning you i dont have any#what fucking bullshit#at least call it what it is#but then after that to have a sappy birthday post to the guy that introduced you to crack#right#thats the guy that you have time and effort for#and then you get a girls day with her#cant say that doesnt hurt#cause it seems like shes avoiding me#and im seriously at a point where it feels like youre the one telling her to#because why should i have a slimmer at a hope of a chance at growth right?#i cant trust you at all#i cant trust my secrets were safe#i cant trust youre even sober#do you know why?#because youre fucking not#but fucking a all ive done is fucking worry over you#you do a whole bunch of shit like that as to super not only not quelm that fear#but really leave me up shits creak
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since i'm talking about bull today, i think its a bit of a mistep to say bull turning against the inquisitor in trespasser is an act of revenge for the death of the chargers. this isn't a result of the inquisitor betraying bull or hurting him. it is a result of the inquisitor reaffirming iron bull's place within the qun. it isn't something that the inquisitor "deserves" for killing a group of beloved soldiers. it is simply the consequence of choosing a political allegiance- the qun- and enforcing the idea that a small part can and should be sacraficed for the greater whole. the chargers can be sacrificed for the inquisiton, the inquisitor (and dorian, and vivienne, and sera, and anyone else bull befriended) can be sacrificed for the qun.
#dai#dragon age#dragon age inquisition#iron bull#the iron bull#bull is not angry at the inquisitor for the death of his men. he does not blame them. if anything he blames himself.#idk im yapping#can you tell bull rots my brain#i cant talk about the qun without tearing my hair out though. my twin is the qun enjoyer im the qun critiquer#but yeah. its not an act of revenge. cole even says that there is “no hurt” during trespasser tied to bull and the chargers#and none of bull's dialogue hints at kt#edit: it*#HOWEVER. however. that doesnt mean i like it.#also as much as i absolutely despite solas' and bull's banter it hints that bull made the choice to safe/sacrafice the chargers which is.#wrong. the inquisitor did.#idk why im mentioning that its just weird#edit: despise* lordd i type too quick
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Dean would push Cas out of the way of a gunshot on instinct even though as an Angel he's completely invulnerable to it
I don't know how to unpack or explain this. he just would
#after the moment is over Cas would be like 'Dean a bullet cant hurt me' and Dean would be like 'I know- I know. I just...'#he just moved on instinct what can he say (no really. he doesnt know what to say)#destiel#deancas#destiel headcanon
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genuinely embarrassing how blossomfall gets more fandom sympathy than breezepelt. “boohoo my sister is disabled and my mommy is emotionally abusing her paying more attention to her than me and i hate my stupid ass sister for getting herself disabled and wish she died. also im a grown ass woman.” vs “my dad hit and neglected me as a child and isolated me from my clanmates and it left me maladjusted and seeking validation from terrible sources and its implied hes like this because he’s drooling after the one that got away” like how is this not cut and dry. you cant even soak in the shitty “well breezepelt was a shitty kid” excuse because blossomfall was also shitty before and after the incident. tbh, id argue she’s shittier because breezepelt actually did change his behavior while blossomfall is just as bigoted as ever.
#i was gonna make a joke like ‘’damn fandom misogyny would actually work here why cant you all do that here’’#and then i remembered this is actually kinda stemmed in misogyny in a backwards way#bc the one who hurt blossomfall was millie. the dumb bitch who broke up the silvergray ship and is annoying and entitled bc she kept her na#name#and briarlight is a shitty snd bad character bc ‘’shes unrealistic’’ and she ruined berryhoney or something#meanwhile crow is a wonderful character bc he has the most unique plot ever (manpain)#and every character who speaks against him doesnt understand how amazing and well written he is#so breeze sucks because he threatens the idea that crow is a wonderful person and character#and thats not to say you cant hate millie or anything bc she does legitimately suck in oots#but idk….. blossomfall sympathy always felt like it was rooted in millie hate from shipping culturr#millie bad because she ruined childhood ship. breeze bad because he also ruined childhood ship#wow it really sounds gross when you break it down to just that huh
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An idiot like you...an idiot like you...
KISEKI: DEAR TO ME Ep. 9
#kiseki: dear to me#kisekiedit#kdtm#kiseki dear to me#ai di x chen yi#chen yi x ai di#nat chen#chen bowen#louis chiang#chiang tien#jiang dian#userspring#uservid#userspicy#userjjessi#pdribs#*cajedit#*gif#IM BACK WITH MORE MICROEXPRESSIONS AND MINOR DETAILS POSTING WHEEEEEEEEEEEE#anyway 'only i...since i was young til now...have been looking at you' if you even care. cuz. *gestures* this is ALL that. in these hugs#and okay thinking about it - im a little obsessed with the way we dont really See the reasons Why ai di loves chen yi#like usually in dramas theres a 'here's who he is through x's eyes here's why he is desirable' etc. and kiseki is not. like that.#ai di and chen yi bicker constantly. chen yi brushes ai di off. we see all their rough patches. but the little things ai di says in ep4 -#'he picks on & scolds me the most but he cares for me the most' are shown as part of it all AND actually one of the first things ai di says#in that scene is that they grew up together. like idk theres something about how it doesnt need to be some big thing.#some great quality of chen yi's that makes him loveable. ai di just loves him. it's that simple. he just does and always has and always wil#and loves him for everything chen yi is. even the parts that hurt him. 'an idiot like you' followed by 'im naive. im foolish.' IDK MAN.....#ITS LIKE AI DI IS ACCEPTING AND LOVING ALL OF CHEN YI'S INADEQUACIES. WHILE DAMNING HIS OWN. feeling so stupid for feeling so much#for someone he cant help but love - bc their lives have always. been. entwined. & you see that love echoed in chen yi. in how relaxed he is#how he kisses ai di's choker..follows ai di's lead & ai di's mouth. before chen yi's mind knows its ai di his body knows & loves him easily
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For the Swanatello fam: what does everyone miss most about Donnie during his lake-induced absences?
for donnie, leo will gladly give every scrap of patience and grace and gentleness he has. he doesn't mind explaining things. he doesn't mind telling his brother the same things over and over. he doesn't mind it when donnie forgets or doesn't understand or needs his help to remember or process things.
but he misses the banter. the back-and-forth. the stupid fights and pranks and 'you said's' and 'i told you so's.' and, perhaps a bit selfishly, he misses when he didn't always feel like he had to be the bigger person for him. he misses when he still had the space to be childish and immature and petty towards his twin, and it wouldn't hurt either of them the way it tends to now.
[ swanatello ]
#swanatello#its no fun to pick a fight if you cant apologize and make up later#getting in that perfect GOTTEM line doesnt feel v good if the only reason is bc the other guy is confused/cant remember what ur talking abt#sure leo is still his typical brand of obnoxious and extra most of the time. esp when donnie is having a good day.#but the rules are just so different now.#hes so frustrated and tense all the time he has to step carefully because if he doesnt#he loses himself and crosses the line and says things that he doesnt mean and will regret#things that used to roll right off donnies back now sometimes really hurt him because he doesnt remember the context#or just because his emotional state is so volatile right now. hes scared and confused almost all the time now.#its stressful. its exhausting. so the threshold is different#leo will be gentle and careful and thoughtful with donnie for as long as he needs to be. even if he has to be for the rest of his life.#but he still misses when he felt like he knew all the rules. when it was easy. when he didnt have to be.#rottmnt#save rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#save rise of the tmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rise of the tmnt#donniesona#tmnt#tmnt 2018#tmnt 2k18#rottmnt disaster twins#asks
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godddd when autism is a disorder that effects me ?! blasphemous.
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taco and mephone have fascinating parallels more people could explore if taco haters weren't biased cowards
#meeple.txt#inanimate insanity#ii taco#ii mephone4#dare i maintag this. watever#like taco haters r obsessed with the idea that taco is ruining herself worse and dragging everyone down with her#when shes literally just doing the challenge mephone created and even changes her intentions on hosting the challenge partway through#bc shes REALIZING how badly everyones been affected by the show just as she was#and she uses the attention she now has and urges them to leave and escape because she doesnt want anyone to end up like her#she believes shes past saving Yes#but thats exactly why shes trying to help the others avoid getting to the extent shes gone#meanwhile even when getting his wrongdoings slapped in his face mephone doubles down bc thats all he knows#thats all he feels safe with. he cant let himself trust and be vulnerable and its ruining his life and all his relationships along with him#it says SO MUCH about both mephones and tacos arcs that MEPAD. the one whos been inseparable to mephone from the Start#is seeing more hope of improvement in TACO than mephone#taco the infamous villain to everyone since s1. since before mepad was ever conscious#if anything mephone is the one ruining himself in denial and hurting others in the process#and im not saying that to vilify mephone either !!!! before you 0 nuance bitches come in#if it wasnt obvious from my entire page i LOVE mephone and i LOVE where theyre taking his character. make that man Worse ❤️#but i feel like so many ppl are just projecting mephones arc onto taco bc they dont wanna admit mephone has Issues
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something something about dead boy detectives what edwin's and charles' friendship is actually works in show so half of fandom won't even care if they end up romantic or stay friends. (almost won't care. we all love queer stuff. can't judge.) I, personally, just love their whole dynamic and for me it's totally understandable that charles went into hell for his friend and stayed on earth as a ghost so he can be with edwin. and I think edwin actually meant it when he said "he did not feel the same way but i think we're better friends because of it".
idk for me they're just love each other so purely. what's even a difference between romantic and platonic love?
#love is love#there's no difference as long as it warms ur heart#<- not my words btw#george said he don't think edwin is hurt by charles' words!!#i love then geogre talks about edwin btw#he just says my thoughts abt edwin#idk he doesnt know i exist but oh god he understands me so deeply#and btw charles literaly said “there's no one else no one else in the world who i will go to hell for”#!!#and i hate when somebody says that romantic love is “more” than a friendship cuz fuck no not really its all love#we cant live without love yes but it was never abt romantic love#dead boy detectives#dbd#dbd spoilers#edwin payne#charles rowland#chedwin#painland#paynland#edwin paine
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House's tendency to rationalize feelings away and being frustrated at himself for still feeling them. It's hurting me 😢
At the end of 05x04 Birthmarks he did a paternity test... And even after it turned out that John wasnt his father, he was still drinking his whiskey, because it didn't mean anything that John wasn't his biological father, because things are still the same.
He's still sad, he's still depressed. The dipshit of a man passing still made him sad. And the thought that he can't even rationalize it away as hatred upsets him. And so he drinks.
And to that Wilson said no one can choose their parents... Because House rejects John as his paternal figure and yet deep inside, House still called him his dad.
#i think everything he said at John's eulogy was real. he meant every word#of course if his mother wasnt there he would be a lot meaner#but he meant it.#house pushes people away because hes scared of being hurt#hes an asshole because nobody connects with an asshole and thus everyone is at arms length at best#and yet when people leave him he still mourns#his ducklings from season 3#wilson in season 5#and even that dipshit of a man john house#and idk its. it makes me sad#it just doesnt have to be this way#i want him to chase happiness and i want him to be happy#instead he just refuses it because happiness is associated with pain#because everyone leaves him in the end#im so sad#house md#gregory house#greg house#doctor house#not to say that people cant reject their parents and feel no remorse for their death#its just that house... that sensitive man#that depressed fearful man#he cant do that. because deep down he craves that connection#he wishes his father were better. he wishes he was the man his father wanted him to be#which makes it even more painful to observe
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juvie buddies
#alek art#td duncan#td mal#total drama#total drama all stars#(if i want to get technical)#2024#duncan is around 15 here... mal is around 16#ive thought really hard about them these past few days . in my brain they actually knew each other and canon is different#duncan and mike got along really well. in juvie mal refused to speak to anyone about anything and would fight as many people as he could .#he wanted to stay in there and far away from home . they get roomed together and duncan is the first person who mal can talk to . he isnt#scared of him . he relates to him a lot . like -> wow we both act out for attention and people think we are terrible because of it#duncan being a mentally ill teenager seeing mal an also very mentally ill teenager thought 'i can fix him' . mike and duncan speak too here#i cant really see anyone else fronting besides those two . their brain was on lockdown and mike wanted out so bad . i see manitoba as a#gatekeeper so hed handle some sessions with their psych. i want to say they (duncan and mike) get moved to a psyche ward just because#i have more knowledge on being in one and how it goes ... but yeah i like duncan mal a lot . this art isnt ship whatsoever though 🙏 i dont#see them as a couple their dynamic is just better as friends imo#but anyways in all stars they obviously recognize each other but have an unspoken agreement not to say anything abt it#duncan is a known criminal but mike isnt like that . mike hadnt even told zoey about that part of his life . so duncan wanted to respect his#privacy -> then mal starts hurting people and he has to step in . mal isnt a good person by any means but i dont think he was that bad in#juvie . so duncan had to come to terms that his friend wasnt the same person he was years ago (in all stars duncan is ~18 and i think mike#is almost 20... so it had been a while since they last talked)#them getting each other like no other and being in pain because they couldnt really speak . i see them having a conversation still in moon#madness abt their past and history . god i just think abt them and their wasted potential wdym mike and duncan were in juvie together#duncan was in for trespassing or destruction of private property or something really dumb . mal fought his parent(s) and got in for assault#mal was already in when duncan was placed . and duncan was let out early on good behavior + his parents (dad) mostly did it to teach him a#lesson . wrong of them or otherwise . so mal was just kinda stuck there until they realized he was actually not right in the head . think he#knew abt their DID but was only diagnosed in juvie and had to go from there . tbh he shouldve been tried as an adult but td logic . doesnt#matter dw guys . mike gets the 'was put on random meds that made him go braindead' treatment bc that was me . post mental hospital abilify#had me messed up
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OP really said ARGUE WITH A WALL by disabling reblogs and its so funny to me. Why do you speak on public platforms despite knowing you're so utterly wrong that you cant bear to get dragged for your misguided 'canon' takes LMAO.
Let me spell this out for you, JGY and JC are both negative af and manipulative bitches in their own right. They DONT care. You're trying to tell me people should care for others solely because they're related? How do you explain domestic abuse, both canon and irl?? People hurt the ones they claim to love, ones they're related to on the name of discipline and love and thats a fact. You dont have to hate someone to hurt them, love in itself can be horribly toxic too.
As for JGY, dude I am not going to argue about him wanting to protect JL this is the fucking guy who killed his own flesh and blood so his crimes arent exposed and used his 'murder' to put an end to clans opposing him. He does NOT care about JL, he's just chill with him because JL poses no risk to him in any way, neither in terms of stealing his post as Chief Cultivator and LanlingJin leader, nor as someone who has some dirty secrets he can hold over him. JL is harmless, why would he do anything?? Yea if JL ever got in his way...oops, accidents happen, dont they?
Edit: I never said JL doesn't care about JC and JGY. He clearly does, a lot. However spoiling someone is not equal to being good to them. A lot of people spoil others because they have no other way of showing their love I.e. have shit personality, etc which is the case with JC. He loves JL yes but is he a good role model? No. He uses money and other material things to keep JL's affection because he truly has no other way. JGY? Maybe he likes JL, maybe he doesnt but point is JL loves him and is clearly alive so...
#canon jiang cheng#jin guangyao#jin ling#stop this madness if you cant take criticism#JC stans and their rapidly worsening takes#hate is not the only reason people hurt people ya know#literally no one says jc hates jl#he doesnt#but his love itself is incredibly toxic and it shows#jgy is all chill because jl is not a threat to him in any way#but the minute he becomes one...
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Headcanon that when Sasuke and Sakura came back to Konoha Ino ran up to her and told Sasuke they would be going on a date and started fussing over Sarada and Sakura.
And Sai, with no idea what to do just takes Sasukes hand and is like: "We'll be going now." Cause he just assumes that they're just swapping partners for like girls night out and a guys night out.
And Sasuke, in shock with no idea what to do sort of just gets pulled away by Sai and looks back at Sakura with fear and confusion in his eyes.
(Of course Sakura finds this hilarious and just watches her husband get taken away.)
#Sai is so girlboss fr#Sai#Naruto#naruto shippuden#naruto blank period#sakura haruno#uchiha sasuke#ino yamanaka#sai yamanaka#Sasusaku#saiino#inosai#sakura uchiha#I wanted to draw this but my joints hurt too bad so I settled for this#Sasuke#Sakura#sasuke x sakura#Now every time Ino and Sakura hang out Sasuke is terrified of Sai#YOUR HONOR PLEASE THEYRE MY CHILDREN#Not Sasuke he's my husband <3#They should put me back in the hospital my brain is molding#Brain rot is happing at a substantial pace#Sadly it can't be canon because Sasuke would never let his daughter out of his sight when he knows Ino is there#I cant explain it but I know he just doesn't trust her with big tasks#(She's a trained medical professional and would literally never be irresponsible enough to endanger a child)#(He knows this#Just doesnt care)
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son boy raccoon trash can man suffering in a dnd au as a cleric bc his warlock will not stop committing murders and he has to keep coming up with reasons murder is valid to convince the gm its fine and under control
#my characters#oops i fell in love#right is trying his best in the au to think about all the logic behind killing someone despite being a cleric SPECIFICALLY#bc he refuses to hurt anyone irl or in dnd and ok fine their warlock can have a little murder as a treat#and the body count is adding up and hes like ... so tired..... please can you not kill for five minutes im running out of excuses#fwiw he has the weird logic of the group in the base plot and the guy who is the gm here#is v open about ok but if we ask right then hell give an unhinged answer completely thought out and rationalized#and in fact asks him hey i know you refuse to hurt people but im having a debate with these two coworkers#if you had to commit a crime for aaaaaanyone on the planet who would you commit a crime for#and he doesnt even hesitate to say luca obviously to which the asker is like WHAT ABOUT MY DAUGHTER#YOU WANNA MARRY HER AND WONT COMMIT A CRIME FOR HER? but LUCA? of all people???? not even brent?#and right is just so confused because first off brent would probably be the one committing a crime for him without being forced#(brent agrees with this statement with a shrug) and second off luca has really weird coworkers and thought he was getting stalked for a bit#due to a misunderstanding with said one weird coworker so yeah obviously right would threaten the guy with a gun which is illegal and#third and final how could he face his beloved angel (the daughter mentioned above) if he was a criminal#he cant tarnish a sweet little innocent girls opinion by committing a crime IN HER NAME gosh fuck off with that attitude#he has STANDARDS thank you very much#and the three at the table are all like okay yeah that was really thought out on the fly youre right#also brent do not commit any crimes for him please and brent just nods in agreement bc ok he wont commit a crime unprompted#also hi animal crossing emotes are so fun to doodle for bye#once again i am baffled by how different the colors look on my laptop in the art program vs posting to tumblr#im going to go insane at how different they look#IM COLOR PICKING FOR MY OWN OCS AND ITS SO WRONG LOOKING IDK MAN
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can i be honest i never understood artists getting so mad or hurt about breaking mutuals or whatevr. like unfollowing without soft blocking or actually blocking
#its always giving insta mentality to me#not artist insta private one w the “im not ur fan remove me”#most mutual follows happen because i liked someones art nd they liked mine why does it matter so much if one party stops#like maybe smth u draw just makes me uncomfortable. maybe i just dont fw ur current fandom why do we make it SO personal#u couldnt pay me to care that much unless we actually were friends nd talked before and not just mutuals#im not saying that u cant feel hurt about unreasonable things right but the fact that this is the default idk…. idk dawg#maybe someone just doesnt like the art anymore im sorry why do u always assume its max level malicious#i also say artists specifically because i feel like that? should not just be about the person?#if someone doesnt like my art anymore (without straight up hating ME) I still like theirs like why r u guys always so petty
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Why did you do it? I don't know what you're talking about. I was drunk that night, and you told me you would always look at me— You want to get back at me, right?
KISEKI: DEAR TO ME Ep. 09
#kiseki: dear to me#kisekiedit#kdtm#kiseki dear to me#ai di x chen yi#chen yi x ai di#louis chiang#chaing tien#jiang dian#nat chen#chen bowen#userspring#userrain#uservid#userspicy#userjjessi#pdribs#*cajedit#*gif#WE LOVE WHEN AI DI IS A BITCH. 10/10 NO NOTES. just. be a freak about it why dont you i love this for him#its actually insane how good of a liar he is. like........he really truly seems so unbothered by everything#but no matter what he says the idea of something casual is the last thing he could ever want. its so painful for him#and he only pushes the idea because he doesnt think chen yi will ever ever love him seriously OR casually#as if the idea of being with him could anger chen yi. SHOULD anger chen yi. because of how preposterous it is#but he also feels like he owes chen yi. like. ai di literally thought that after prison chen yi would never seek him out#would never want to speak to him ever again and he thinks thats BETTER for them too bc he cant take back what he did AND#he cant take back his own vulnerability. but he cant take anything casual with chen yi so he hides behind this facade of being uncaring#that chen yi KNOWS is FALSE and that BREAKS ME. his face as ai di pushes past him.......ow.#a more openly expressive version of 'i know he's lying to me but i dont understand whats going on and that HURTS me' but Extra Painful#because ai di is all chen yi wants. and - 'an explanation'... he wants ai di to want him too
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