#can i dissect why i'm into
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
piko-rose · 5 months ago
Text
My Personal Headcanon On Why Amy's Love For Sonic Died Down Lately (and their dynamic)
Tumblr media Tumblr media
When they were younger, Amy's love for Sonic was pretty extreme, and Sonic was, understandable, uncomfortable for the most part. He knows she means well, but that girl needs to calm down.
She can fight, but sometimes her hammer could only stun her enemies for a while. (It took her a long time to get rid of that robot that has been chasing her around Station Square.) She wasn't fully independent yet, even if she fought on her own a couple of times.
She often follows Sonic and his friends around. She is part of the team, but she was not a strong as she is now at the time yet.
She admires Sonic. A LOT. And Sonic knows that. Obviously, he could only run away from something like that, since he is NOT ready for that kind of thing, and whether Amy takes the hint or stop, she still loves him.
...BUT, I think things were slightly starting to change between her and Sonic after Lost World.
Remember this line?
Tumblr media
You remember that? Okay, okay. Here's another totally unrelated question:
Before the events of Lost World, when was the last time Amy said "I love you" to Sonic out loud?
...YEP. 😈 (Unless I'm missing something, let me know lmao)
As more games and adventures come out, the characters get slightly older, and Amy is 12 to 13 now, and she is most certainly at that age where her body starts to change, but especially on how she views Sonic.
She knows she loves Sonic, but it was this moment during her change where she actually wanted to admit that she loves him.
I believe that Amy was all about sharing her affection to him not through confessions, but through obvious hints. Sonic totally got it, and there was no need to confess. Sonic knows she loves her.
...But she never said it. And she almost did, but she never did again for a while.
I think this was the moment in her life where, oh, God, she actually loves Sonic. SHE LOVES HIM, WHAT.
And she was looking back at all the times she had with Sonic that she can now see were unpleasant to Sonic (At least that's what she thinks) and that's probably why she isn't so expressive about her love to him than how she used to back then.
She wasn't sure what to do with this realization, and sets aside it for a while, and nearly stayed as her casual, peppy self... until the Eggman War happened.
Tumblr media
During the 6 months of being with the Resistance, fighting Eggman's army all day and all night, all she can think of was Sonic.
She dreams that he still with not just her, but with her friends. She just wanted to see Sonic again, she just wants to be with her hero again.
But I'd like to think that she was also thinking about how she used to treat Sonic back when they were younger, how Sonic would almost always run away from her whenever she asks him out, or always look so uncomfortable whenever she gets so close to him.
Cringing at those memories big time, she wanted to change and hopefully when Sonic is okay and comes back, she can be better for him.
...Or will he still find her uncomfortable regardless? Would he even be happy to see her at all if he did survive?
But, hold on! She can't just give up her love for Sonic! He made her who she is today! A peppy, nature-loving, hammer-swinging, confident, brave... loud-mouth... annoying... Sonic obsessed... weak... pathetic... lonely little girl.
If she gives up on Sonic, it'll be like she gave up on the one hedgehog who saved her life. If she didn't she'll still be the same ol' Amy.
I also like to think she had parents a long while before she met Sonic, and was even expecting a little sister, but a robot invasion happened from where she was and attacked her parents and instead of trying to save them, after getting hurt, she ran away, hoping that they'll come back okay. But they never did.
She was all alone, and needed someone, a friend, a new family, someone who will hold her hand, anyone, to be there for her. But she was ignored by lots, and at that point, she's better off by herself, but still longed for company.
Eventually though, her tarot cards told her her future hero, and there might be hope after all. She encountered Sonic, held onto the belief of the cards tight, and the rest is history.
So, with that headcanon in mind, not only did Amy loose her parents that she didn't save because of her cowardliness (she was only so little at the time that happened) and also Sonic, who she thought will be her only hope, but now gone.
She doesn't even care if he did come back, he'd probably hate her now after everything she did to him, always talking about their "future wedding" or forcing him to go to Twinkle Park.
For the last few months of the war, it was nothing but Amy mentally beating herself up for either refusing to change or moving on, and they are both not fine choices.
She loves Sonic, but he does not love her, and she finally, finally realized it. And it's probably for the best if no body loved her at all.
But of course Sonic did survive and all of her worries wash away in an instant, she's just not expressive about her love for Sonic AT ALL now, since she's still worried about it but rather not mention it to Sonic because it doesn't matter.
If Sonic doesn't love her, then her feelings don't matter to him, and according to Amy herself, that is okay.
Tumblr media
But also, I'd like to think that Sonic was thinking about his friends a lot up in the Death Egg for the past months, sometimes it's Tails (worried for his safety), sometimes it's Shadow (because he's wondering why he would join Eggman.) At some point, for a few days, Amy was in his mind the longest, and he felt bad about how he thought he was rude and pushy to her.
He wondered if she's not thinking about it too much, and if she is, will she give up on him? Yeah, he doesn't feel the same and still not looking for a relationship, but it's so strange but interesting how anyone could ever like someone like Sonic the Hedgehog. Amy was never afraid to show that, and she probably might be now.
He couldn't help but feel guilty. They were kids when she was like this, but he was so... arrogant at the time too. Not a lot happened at the time yet. He'd always have trouble expressing how much he value his friends, until he shattered the Paradox Prism. (I'd like to think Prime took place before Forces. It makes sense.)
She is such a sweet girl, and he probably made her believe that he didn't care for her. Just because he doesn't feel the same, that doesn't mean he hates her at all.
He wished he never ran away from Amy... Worrying for his little bro and wishing to be a good person for Amy was when Sonic cried in the Death Egg for the first and only time.
Tumblr media
Frontiers, in my opinion, is kind of confirming their dynamic now. Sonic is a lot more sincere and kinder to Amy and she is not all hyperactive and lovey to Sonic. There is probably a real reason for this now.
They are both hiding their feelings from them, and they are both unaware of this. Amy, hiding her mental issues from Sonic, and Sonic, hiding his guilt away from Amy.
None of those things are important now. Sonic is with Amy and Amy is with Sonic. They are here with each other. They can be finally be better for each other now.
They don't care if they'll ever be something more when they get older. None of that matters anymore. They are here with each other. They can be finally be better for each other now.
Tumblr media
Maybe someday they'll both talk about it, but for now, the present is important. They care about each other too much to think about it right now.
It's the kind of love that is unbreakable. It doesn't even have to be romantic. It's just love. Love is important for everyone, in any form. It's something Sonic and his friends need. And especially Sonic and Amy.
Amy Rose is the living embodiment of love, and without her, a lot would go downhill for Sonic and co. Heck, if it weren't for her, Shadow wouldn't have never remembered Maria's promise, which lead him to save the world with Sonic, before he temporarily disappeared from their lives for a while.
She is always there to lend a helping hand for anybody, even bad guys like Metal Sonic, and despite what she had been through, both in Forces and headcanon wise, she still fights back, even without her hammer.
She will pick you back up on your feet, reminding you that you are important and that you are loved, and that you should never give up. It's pretty much the words of encouragement she herself needed also...
She is still the happy, hyper, butt-kicking hedgehog we all know and love, but she still need someone to pick her back up on her feet after so long. Thankfully, she has her friends and her blue hero. The hero who made her who she is today.
I think Amy has no idea how important she thought she is, but Sonic does. Sonic knows fully well how important she is to a lot of people. It's about time he returns the favor to her. It's his turn to remind her how much a lot of people love her.
How much he loves her.
And I feel like The Murder of Sonic the Hedgehog was the moment where their dynamic really shined, but also the starting point of their relationship not only healing, but also the next chapter of what's to come for them.
Everyone, friends old and new, gathered around for a special birthday. A birthday for the confident, unshakable, and radiant Amy Rose.
It was such a special moment in Amy's life. After years of chasing and following the people she look up to, she is part of the team, but most importantly, she is part of the family.
She is fully realized as someone more than just a fangirl, but someone strong, courageous, creative, kind and a big inspiration for others.
I feel like this moment here...
Tumblr media
-is where Amy is eternally grateful to call her friends her family. A family she thought she'll never have again. She's not alone anymore, and as long as they're by her side, she'll never will be again.
Her chasing days are over. She's finally caught up to them. She's finally home.
And it's all thanks to Sonic.
If it weren't for him, she'd probably be alone forever. Her past moments with Sonic might be embarrassing to look back on for a while, but they are good memories regardless, because they involve him.
Sonic saved her life in more ways than one, and despite everything, he's grateful to have her too.
He cares about her. He really does... And in her eyes, that all she needed to know. As long as Sonic loves her in his own way, she'll be happy.
Amy hasn't given up on Sonic. As long as Amy always supports him, he'll be happy.
Maybe sometime in the future, they can talk about their problems, but that's a story for another time. At this point, they need to. Right now, they are happy. They are okay.
They are here for each other. They are finally better for each other now.
"You guys won't ever leave me, right?"
"Wouldn't dream of it."
#piko rambles#sonic the hedgehog#amy rose#Meant to be platonic but I don't care if you tag as ship lol#I've been meaning to post something like this for the longest time now but never really got into posting it-#-because you guys REALLY hate seeing these two together for some reason.#Well not for SOME reason. There are valid reasons why you don't ship them. Everyone has valid reason why they don't ship this or that.#But sometimes those reasons can just sound so petty to me. Like the reason why is because Amy is a stalker or Sonic hates her which is FALS#Also those age gap arguments are understandable but so goddamn annoying sometimes. Maybe when they hit their late teens or early twenties-#then they can be together if they want to. Besides a good percentage of Sonic ships are better off if they waited til they're old enough im#I love them regardless of whether they're just friends or an awkward older cringe fail couple lmao#But them being just friends and hiding away all their emotions towards each other just to keep them safe and happy with them- 😭😭😭#Son/adow is my favorite ship of all time and sonamy is my favorite childhood ship/platonic ship because they both have one thing in common.#ANGST 😀#I've been thinking about Sonic and Amy's dynamic as of late and MAN-#Mixed with some personal headcanons of mine and their dynamic as of late just makes me so emotional.#Sonic and Amy have gotten so close now and it's so sweet but so heartbreaking at the same time when you think about it.#I'm so happy they are getting along better and being there for each other but there is so much to dissect here. So much to think about.#I might be a little silly but Amy losing her parents and being alone for so long and being the reason why she's always hanging onto Sonic-#-explains SOOOOOOOOO much about her. At least that's my headcanon for WHY that is.#Amy with abandonment issues speaks to me on a personal level. I'm always afraid of being forgotten or left behind by my family.#I sometimes feel like I'm not good enough no matter how hard I try. I do not blame Amy. I relate to her a lot. It's one of the many reasons#-why Amy is my favorite character besides Sonic and Shadow.#She fights hard to prove she's a valuable member of the team and hates getting left behind but despite all that she wasn't afraid to-#-express herself and her love for people. But after the Eggman War there was some changes that made her less expressive about her love.#Yeah she still loves Sonic but she doesn't admit it because none of that matters anymore and she thought that not being loved by Sonic#-is better than being loved since she nearly wasted her life loving someone who she thought has constantly bothered. 🥲#But I think after TMoStH I think she'll be less afraid of being expressive about it. She and Sonic are just so caring for each other 😭#I love these two way too much that when I think about them for too long I'll start SOBBING 😭😭 I'M EVEN SOBBING RIGHT NOW LMAO
72 notes · View notes
skrunksthatwunk · 6 months ago
Text
actually i'm still thinking about the moral orel finale.
Tumblr media
he has a cross on his wall. do you know how much i think about that bc it's a lot.
a lot of stories ((auto)biographical or fictional) centering escape from abusive/fundamentalist christianity result in the lead characters leaving behind christianity entirely. and that makes complete sense! people often grow disillusioned with the associated systems and beliefs, and when it was something used to hurt them or something so inseparable from their abuse that they can't engage with it without hurting, it makes total sense that they would disengage entirely. and sometimes they just figure out that they don't really believe in god/a christian god/etc. a healthy deconstruction process can sometimes look like becoming an atheist or converting to another religion. it's all case by case. (note: i'm sure this happens with other religions as well, i'm just most familiar with christian versions of this phenomenon).
but in orel's case, his faith was one of the few things that actually brought him comfort and joy. he loved god, y'know? genuinely. and he felt loved by god and supported by him when he had no one else. and the abuses he faced were in how the people in his life twisted religion to control others, to run away from themselves, to shield them from others, etc. and often, orel's conflicts with how they acted out christianity come as a direct result of his purer understanding of god/jesus/whatever ("aren't we supposed to be like this/do that?" met with an adult's excuse for their own behavior or the fastest way they could think of to get orel to leave them alone (i.e. orel saying i thought we weren't supposed to lie? and clay saying uhhh it doesn't count if you're lying to yourself)). the little guy played catch with god instead of his dad, like.. his faith was real, and his love was real. and i think it's a good choice to have orel maintain something that was so important to him and such a grounding, comforting force in the midst of. All That Stuff Moralton Was Up To/Put Him Through. being all about jesus was not the problem, in orel's case.
and i know i'm mostly assuming that orel ended up in a healthier, less rigid version of christianity, but i feel like that's something that was hinted at a lot through the series, that that's the direction he'd go. when he meditates during the prayer bee and accepts stephanie's different way to communicate, incorporating elements of buddhism into his faith; when he has his I AM A CHURCH breakdown (removing himself from the institution and realizing he can be like,, the center of his own faith? taking a more individualistic approach? but Truly Going Through It at the same time), his acceptance (...sometimes) of those who are different from him and condemned by the adults of moralton (stephanie (lesbian icon stephanie my beloved), christina (who's like. just a slightly different form of fundie protestant from him), dr chosenberg (the jewish doctor from otherton in holy visage)). his track record on this isn't perfect, but it gets better as orel starts maturing and picking up on what an absolute shitfest moralton is. it's all ways of questioning the things he's been taught, and it makes sense that it would lead to a bigger questioning as he puts those pieces together more. anyway i think part of his growth is weeding out all the lost commandments of his upbringing and focusing on what faith means to him, and what he thinks it should mean. how he wants to see the world and how he wants to treat people and what he thinks is okay and right, and looking to religion for guidance in that, not as like. a way to justify hurting those he's afraid or resentful of, as his role models did.
he's coming to his own conclusions rather than obediently, unquestioningly taking in what others say. but he's still listening to pick out the parts that make sense to him. (edit/note: and it's his compassion and his faith that are the primary motivations for this questioning and revisal process, both of individual cases and, eventually, the final boss that is christianity.) it makes perfect sense as the conclusion to his character arc and it fits the overall approach of the show far better. it's good is what i'm saying.
and i think it's important to show that kind of ending, because that's a pretty common and equally valid result of deconstruction. and i think it cements the show's treatment of christianity as something that's often (and maybe even easily) exploited, but not something inherently bad. something that can be very positive, even. guys he even has a dog he's not afraid of loving anymore. he's not afraid of loving anyone more than jesus and i don't think it's because he loves this dog less than bartholomew (though he was probably far more desperate for healthy affection and companionship when he was younger). i think it's because he figures god would want him to love that dog. he's choosing to believe that god would want him to love and to be happy and to be kind. he's not afraid of loving in the wrong way do you know how cool that is he's taking back control he's taking back something he loves from his abusers im so normal
#i had a really big fundie snark phase a year or two ago so that's part of like. this. but im still not used to actually talking about#religious stuff so if it reads kinda awkwardly uhh forgive me orz idk#maybe it sounds dumb but i like that the message isn't 'religion is evil'. it easily could have been. but i think the show's points about#how fundie wasp culture in particular treats christianity and itself and others would be less poignant if they were like. and jesus sucks#btw >:] like. this feels more nuanced to me. i guess there's probably a way to maintain that nuance with an ultimately anti-christian#piece of media but i think it'd be like. wayy harder and it's difficult for me to imagine that bc i think a lot of it would bleed out into#the tone. + why focus on only These christians when They're All also bad? so you'd get jokes about them in general#and i think that's kinda less funny than orel and doughy screaming and running from catholics lsdkjfldksj#i think the specificity makes it more unique and compelling as comedy and as commentary. but that's just me#like moralton represents a very particular kind of christian community (namely a middle class fundie wasp nest)#you're not gonna be able to get in the weeds as much if you're laughing at/criticizing all christians. but they accomplish it so thoroughly#and WELL in morel and i think that's because it chose a smaller target it can get to dissect more intimately. anyway#moral orel#orel puppington#(OH also when i say wasp here i mean WASP the acronym. as in white anglo-saxon protestsant. in case the term's new to anyone <3)#maybe it's also relevant to say that i'm kindaaaaaaaa loosely vaguely nonspecifically christian. so there's my bias revealed#i was never raised like orel but i like to think i get some of what's going on in there y'know. in that big autistic head of his#but it's not like i can't handle anti-christian/anti-religious media/takes. i'm a big boy and also i v much get why it's out there yknow#christianity in specific has a lot of blood on its hands from its own members and from outsiders and people have a right to hate it for tha#but religion in all its forms can be positive and i appreciate the nuance. like i've said around 20 times. yeah :) <3#(<- fighting for my life to explain things even though my one job is to be the explainer)
77 notes · View notes
chaika-jpeg-shitpost · 5 months ago
Text
Joseph, just like Chika, had someone weak and helpless in his care. However, when the threat of death from starvation drove him into a corner, he refused to abandon the one he promised to protect. Unlike Chika
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
54 notes · View notes
deeism · 8 months ago
Text
ok no honestly i'm thinking about it i am so pumped not even just for sunny 17 itself (i mean obviously) but more so for the experience it's going to be for sunnyblr to get together and watch it and talk together and reconvene after every episode and share our thoughts and stuff. seriously highlight of my summer last year was doing that. we are going to get so so weird about it. there will be such pointless and unsettling discourse. and ultimately it will bring us closer. and it will be a great time
57 notes · View notes
emioliravioli · 2 months ago
Text
oh yeah, here are the thoughts i had while watching the second trailer..... lotsa ramblings and weird screaming noises below the cut
(obv spoilers!!)
ohh my GOD
so the chao are like a japanese brand? ok-
POKEMON IS CANON??
then what other video games are canon? is nintendo in the sonic movieverse???
chao also take inspiration from green hill
........are they in the chao garden/cafe because sonic recognized it?? or am i overthinking?
also tails does NOT look like pikachu or detective pikachu, i think that kid needs glasses
knuckles knows about pokemon?? did i miss that part of the knuckles show?
ok eggman, shooting missiles at a children's cafe, go off girl
love sonic switching between cocky and nervous
.............sonic heroes refrence?? they're standing as a trio, and knuckles switches with sonic and yep i am thinking too much
what the HECK are those outfits i LOVE them
wait does tom or maddie know how to crochet??? i should make a donut lord sweater-
the 0.5 or fisheye shot on tails oh my god
THEY'RE SO COOL
tails using technology to help him fly aaaargh
wait yeah gerald is definitely alive i guess
really thought he'd be a hologram........ are they just gonna say he was in tube sleep too??
HE PISSED ON THE MOON
THEY KEEP USING LIVE AND LEARN
IF IT'S NOT IN THE ACTUAL MOVIE I WILL..... uh... be sad :(
MARIA OH MY GOD
they're in a bunch of flowers and it's blue like dark beginnings? is this shot part of a dream? maria looks younger here also
OH MY GOD THEY LOOK SO HAPPY
NO WHAT THE FUCK
THEY GAVE HIM AN ACTUAL GUN OH MY GOD
GAY HIGHLIGHTS?????????
empty head mind blown
wait is this set during christmas??
20 notes · View notes
4lph4kidz · 10 days ago
Text
i think i'll probably elaborate on this eventually because i'm not sure how well i can word this right now, but essentially one reason i keep coming back to homestuck is that to some degree it's also an excercise in self examination? i enjoy it as a work, but i also feel compelled to dissect my response to it, for a variety of reasons. if you think that sounds like a nightmarish ouroborous of OCD-fueled pointlessly mastubatory overthinking then you'd be right
12 notes · View notes
a-s-levynn · 1 year ago
Text
Tumblr media
"We balance fire in the earth we walk / Will never stop me reaching forth" A Series of Small Offerings - III/3 - day24
51 notes · View notes
butterflywithsass · 3 months ago
Text
Things I Wish I knew living on my own
This is gonna be pretty short at the moment (I'll add more later) because I haven't been living on my own for very long and I think there's still plenty that I still have to figure out. I'm also drunk as I write this so this might be rambling.
This is gonna be chock full of really obvious stuff for most people but stuff that really confused or stressed me out when I did it. It's also gonna have that obvious stuff that's not so obvious because no one really talks about it until you are on your own and you haven't the first idea how to start.
First things first. Money. You're gonna need it, so look up a bank that is in your area and look into the process of setting up an account. Some banks have this online, sometimes you need to walk into the bank and do it in person. In both cases, make sure you have a passport, birth certificate, or other ID on you, as literally everything you know about your financial state prior to this. Ask your parents if you need to, or someone who knows this, because they are gonna ask a lot of questions. Once you've got the account set up make sure to confirm your ID. I set up an account online, and since I forgot to do this step, I have now had my account deactivated and I need to start all over again. Don't be like me.
If you're in a foreign country like me, make sure you understand how the currency works, and set up a method to transfer funds without having to pay the tax every time. Set up an app like Wise or something similar so people can transfer you money and you can move it to your bank account. Make sure you have a rough idea of how much something is worth in each currency. I'm still adjusting to using pounds, and things would look really cheap until I realized that a pound is worth slightly more than a dollar.
Services. I mean stuff like wifi and tv and stuff. If you're a student, than your wifi is fine, just make sure you set it up right. Euroroam is a bitch, so make sure you google how to do it right and just follow it step by step. Ask for help. Just ask someone. I'm so serious. Another thing I'm struggling with is TV. In the UK you have to have a license for BBC iplayer. Don't listen to your British friends when they say you don't need it. You do. If you don't have it you will get prosecuted. I don't wanna get prosecuted. It's super easy, even if it's kinda expensive, and hey, you get access to everything BBC. Just google tvl.co.uk and something will turn up. You can use that super handy bank card you got when you signed up for the bank account.
Transport. buses, trains and shit. First of all, make sure you download all the apps and inform yourself on how they work. It's gonna be confusing especially if your an American country hick like me so nows the time to learn. Get the maps. Get the bus schedules and routes. Pin them on your wall. Also, There's often some super cool discounts you can get if you sign up. Where I am in Scotland at the moment there's such a thing as a YoungScot Card, where you can get bus fair free if you're under 22. If you're not in Scotland, chances are there is something like that if you look. Transport can add up. Don't get Uber or a Taxi unless it's your only option, in which case, GET THE UBER. It's better to pay a butload of money for transport than be stranded somewhere alone. Your safety is more important than money.
Printers. You will need them. Often, there will be documents that you need to sign on paper, and so a printer will be needed. Google places where you can get things printed. If you are a student, make figuring out how to print things at your campus library a priority. I'm about to invest in my own printer just so I can skip this process because it's exhausting.
Voting. Just because you're not in your own country, doesn't mean you shouldn't vote. I'm from America, and care very much about the results of the next presidential election. If you're already registered to vote, try and get an absentee ballot.
Which brings me to mail. Get some stamps, and make sure they are the right ones. There will be postcard stamps, and mail stamps, and international stamps. Get the international letter stamps for your ballot and put them on because mailing is not paid for outside of the US. Then fucking mail it! (I'm swearing at myself so I remember to do this part when I'm sober)
Phone number. You will need a new one. Get an Esim card (should be in your settings if you have an iPhone) Make sure your friends have your new number and test it out to make sure it works when you're in a new country. One thing about Europe, is that the old buildings really suck for phone reception. Also, if you want to make this simpler and can't remember numbers very well, use Whatsapp or Instagram to message people.
Mess. You may go into this with certain ideas of granduer when it comes to personal organization. Be real. You won't be any more organized or tidy on your own than you were with other people. Just make sure that the essentials are accounted for and forgive yourself for the rest. Keep a drawer or a basket for all that important shit like bank statements or that letter that says they're opening an investigation because you haven't bought a tv license so it's all in one place and you don't lose anything. If it's urgent, pin it on your wall (get a bulletin board for this). Do your laundry. If you have your own washing machine and dryer, good for you. I don't, so figure out how the system works with the communal washers and get on that. Once again ask for help. Wash your sheets. Wash your pillowcases. WASH YOURSELF.
Hygiene. I hate it too, but it will make you feel better about yourself if you are clean and your teeth are brushed. This is the first thing to go when you feel in a slump. I know. I hate showers. I hate brushing my teeth, but not doing it makes my self-esteem go down the drain and my depression goes on a victory lap. Just do it. If you can't do anything else on this list, or you feel like everything is too overwhelming, do this. It will make a lot of other things feel doable.
Food. Okay, scratch that. This might be the most important thing. I am currently making a late night dinner of dried mangos and wine because I didn't have the motivation do get dinner tonight which is a prime example of what not to do. Because now I'm drunk and hungry. Get a fucking fridge! Get a microwave! Go to the grocery store and buy food. Even if it's ramen or mac and cheese. At least it's food. At this point, don't worry about eating healthy, just eat. Since I'm not allowed a mini fridge or a microwave, I have to time my meals so I get into the dining hall on time which results in this... So if you're in a similar case, set alarms for meal times, and GO TO THEM! If you miss it. Find a place that has cheap takeout that you will eat as a fall back option.
Groceries. Find a grocery store that has the things you need, and see what kind of membership or regular discounts you can get. You will need it. Don't worry about buying too much food, or buying too much junk food. If you're gonna overspend on something, better it be this and not something else. Eventually, you will get a sense of what you actually like to eat and what you don't. But for now, don't be afraid to buy something just to try it because it might become your new favorite food. Make a running list on your phone of what you need to buy and don't worry about overbuying. If you buy something you don't eat or don't want, give it away! Your neighbors or classmates or friends might want it and food is always a good way to meet people and form connections. At my old school, I became known as the one who would always have a bag of storebought cookies on me in class if anyone was hungry and didn't have any other options. I was proud of that reputation.
Don't restrict your space. It can get easy to walk the same path every day, and never venture outside of the area you know well. But every so often, try and use that bus pass you got, and go a little further afield. Just wander. You don't have to have a goal. Just explore. Living in a new place is the perfect time to do this. I recently ended up in a random church just because the gate was unlocked and the door was open. I ended up accidentally eavesdropping on a late night discussion of eleventh-century catholic manuscripts or something I can't remember and came home with a pamphlet for the catholic church I'm never going to join but it was an experience. Make awkward conversations with the people you haven't met before because maybe you'll end up crushing really hard for her even though she's straight and has a boyfriend and you'll spend the next week hopelessly pining but at least it will be something to mark the passing of time, creeping at this petty pace from day to day. Maybe the way she describes how she's learning to dissect cadavers and the way her eyebrows tilt will inspire you.
It's okay to be lonely. It's hard to adjust to living in a new place. Especially if you're a student at a new school. It may feel like everyone is making friends but you. That may be true. You may find that your neighbor has already met a guy and they are really cute together, and they no longer really want to hang out with you. You may find that the person you connected with really well now longer remembers your name but that's okay. It is a superpower, knowing how to be comfortable on your own. It's something you must learn before you can make a lasting connection with anyone. Those people who are making friends so fast are doing it because they are afraid to be alone. You aren't afraid.
Don't overcomit. Sometimes, you might feel so guilty about not donating to a freind's program to help survivers of domestic abuse in africa that you offer to design a website for them. But yuu're swamped. You have three essays due next week and you need to have an opinion about Homer's portrayal of Ithaka and you're terrified every second you spend not working on your essays, so that yiu ccan't relax even during breaks because you're constantly thinking you're behind but now you have to design a website. Don't fucking do that, What were yoy thinking you fuckin idiot. Just give your freind the money and tell her you can't do it.
Keep in touch with people. Don't fall off the map. There are people you love who are still out there. Your gramma wants to know how you're doing so give them a call, but not when you're drunk that will just make her anxious. Call your freinds from your old school. Ask them how they're doing. When tey tell you they're going on a date be happy for them and don't think bout how single you are. Fuck.
Invest in your projects. Don't forget what you love. Join that Good Omens fanfiction group even though it's one of the few things that you're not obligated to do. Don;t forget your hobbies. Watch the thing that David Tennent was in even though you don't have any prior interest in true crime and watch yourself fall into another spiral of hyperfixation.
Read Shakespeare. Relate so hard. Spend an inordinate amount of time memorizing the Yoric soliquiy from Hamlet. Spend a fortune on tickets to see David Tennent play Macbeth in the west end. Let it be your light. The only thing you are looking forward too at the moment.
You'e on your forth glass of wine. You havent neber been this drunk before becuse you are a syupid American who has just moved to the Uk unserpivused. and you're stressing about exams. You were supposed to be working.
Goodbye!
7 notes · View notes
savage-rhi · 6 months ago
Text
Fuschia/Magenta?
#*deep breath kicks down uni door*#VERN!!! VERNIFRED!!! I GOT A HUGE BONE TO PICK WITH YOU!!!!! YES YOU!!!!#“we're only gonna read 1 chap of Don Quixote because it's too much to dive into.”#THIS COMING FROM THE MAN WHO MADE US READ THE ENTIRETY OF DANTES INFERNO#WHO MADE US WRITE 20 PAGE ESSAYS ON THE ODYSSEY#WHO MADE US FOLLOW HIS CANTERBURY TALES HYPERFIXATION FOR NOT 1 BUT 2 SEMESTERS#DISSECTING EVERY. FUCKING. CHARACTER. ACTION.#MAKING ME RESENT CHAUCER TO WHERE I COULDN'T WATCH A KNIGHTS TALE FOR 3 YEARS STRAIGHT#one of my all time favorite movies btw YOU MADE ME HATE THE THING I LOVED VERNIFRED#and you had the GALL to say the class only had 1 chap to dedicate to Don Quixote?#YOU MY FRIEND JUST DIDN'T WANT THE CLASS TO LOSE THEIR SHIT LAUGHING EVERY OTHER CHAPTER#IF YOU'RE AROUND HUMAN HAPPINESS YOU'RE LIKE A WORM DISCOVERING THE BAIT SECTION AT WALMART#ITS EASY TO READ FOR A CLASSIC HAS WIT IS BITTER SWEET AF IS TRAGIC IS FUN AND MAKES YOU WANT TO HAVE CRAZY MAN BIG DICK ENERGY#WHEN YOU HAVE A FOOT IN THE GRAVE#and the banter...THAT SHIT ROCKS#AND IM NOT JUST SAYING THIS CAUSE OF MY OWN HYPERFIX WITH LUIS AND I'M READING FOR RESEARCH#these stories FUCK#I AM SO MAD#SO SO MAD MY PEERS AND I GOT A TASTE OF SOMETHING THAT WOULD'VE KEPT US ENGAGED#AND I AM MAD THAT I RESENTED THAT CLASS SO MUCH THAT I DIDN'T WANT TO TOUCH THE CLASSICS FOR A WHILE#and that it took me until I'm 31 WRITING A DAMN FANFIC IN MY SPARE TIME TO READ THE ENTIRETY OF WHAT I FUCKING MISSED OUT ON#astarion voice: IT WAS RIGHT THERE!!!!!#vernifred...can i can i call you vern?#look...i love you. you were one of the most humble profs i had i looked forward to going to class every mon and tues for lecture and reading#i get the hyperfixations my guy i really and truly do#BUT I STILL RESENT THE SHIT OUT OF YOU FOR THIS ONE#i finally get why luis loved this shit so much too and im seeing more connections with re4 now and it feels like the cherry on top of it all#vern....just....SIGH....GIVE THE DON A CHANCE MAN#FOR THE SAKE OF THE CHILDREN WHO WILL BE IN YOUR CARE#YOU KNOW...YOU JUST...MAKE ME...GRRRHFHFHHDJDJ!!! 🖕🏼🖕🏼🖕🏼
9 notes · View notes
skinnypaleangryperson · 1 year ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
It's interesting, the contrasting difference between the way that Rick sees and thinks about things versus being someone like Jerry ( this concept that the episode presented is incredibly philosophical in terms of what the difference is between a mind and a brain already.)
But generally, I think this definitely suggests that Rick is either completely miserable inside of his own brain so much the point that in mind like Jerry wouldn't be able to handle it for even one minute from the way that he sees and knows things, which has definitely been suggested throughout the series-and likewise, that he wouldn't be able to handle being inside of a simpler person's brain in for some sort of deeply emotionally and psychologically traumatizing reason that comes along with being wired the way that Rick is. Which I think is interesting, if there's anything to go by from the more nuanced and eccentric people that I've met throughout my life, who have all been completely miserable in contrast to the simpler people around them.
I think it's interesting because it seems to relate to how intelligence or at the very least being a unique thinker than the average leads to someone being completely miserable, and this is a good comical somewhat exaggeration about how mad it would make a person go to be someone who has all of the heaviness that goes on in their brain and the things that they know from intelligence, or maybe not even intelligence but even just being a unique thinker and seeing human life and existence in general in a certain way that might make them different but miserable, and contrast it to a mind like Jerry. I don't know if it was intentional or not, but I definitely see this as an interesting commentary between the contrast between simpler-minded people and more "full-headed", tormented people like Rick-or at the very least, people who are more neurodivergent, versus people who are more content and simple, and how the two would be incredibly dysfunctional coming together.
Mainly watching only the show for any kind of hint that we have towards what it's like to be Rick and his brain, and his emotional state in general, since I find him fascinating and what he represents is a character, I definitely think this is an interesting contrast about how much differently he thinks and sees things in contrast other people, and how much this portrayal is such an abrasive difference between the way that he say things and miserable he is for it and miserable it would make someone like Jerry, the "mind" of Jerry, so to speak, that he wouldn't even be able to hate to stand having that kind of brain for even 5 minutes. Speaks true to reality to me, for some reason, lol.
The reason why this fascinates me so much isn't really so much because of intelligence or anything like that, but more so the contrast between the neurodivergent and the mentally ill versus the more neurotypical and the more simple. As someone who has been miserable their entire life and has seen things very differently from the people around me and has always wondered how people are so happy and content with the way that things are compared to the way that I see them, for me, this feels like an odd contrast between the neurodivergent and the neurotypical, and how completely miserable the neurodivergent are for the way that they see the state of the world and humanity in general. The thoughtful and the heavy-minded and did the people that are constantly seeing day-to-day life with a certain kind of interpretation that is much heavier and more complex, and with self-reflection towards themselves and existence as a whole and ways that are almost incomprehensible with how much they're constantly turning over in their heads life everyday, versus the brainless and the easy minded, so to speak.
21 notes · View notes
alarming-prism · 3 months ago
Text
there is truly something in the air abt getting my first hate comment on breaking patterns/mending threads two years after i finished writing it, and that it happens to be during one of the worst periods of my life
#don't even know what to tag this as#it's not personal bc arguably it's what this blog is for in the first place#but i don't want it showing up in my fandom tags#i don't even want to mention the comment itself bc it's not on them for being upset that i ended it the way i did#but there is something so triggering abt phrasing it as being 'disgusted'#about something very emotional that i honestly relate more to today than i did when i wrote it#if it feels like that whole fic was a projection of certain emotions#it probably was#a dissection of what i write about vs my personal life draws very clear emotional similarities#i've grown a tough skin abt legitimate criticisms on my writing#in fact i genuinely like being told the ways in which my writing is shit#so that i can improve it#but something abt this being abt the fic being too depressing#and having hope but not necessarily happiness#and having that relate to disgust abt the way i presented something that contains emotions that i have felt#and continue to feel bc life is a fucking nightmare and yeah i relate to the impoverished fucking asshole with the desire for affection#it's exhausting to experience this sort of thing even in a fandom space#where expressing my feelings is still not realistic or palatable enough#i get that people have triggers but i put trigger warnings in every single chapter#and you can't put a trigger warning in a comment#or know that i'm having a particularly bad time#it just reminds me why i stopped actively participating in fandom anyway#like i said. triggering
2 notes · View notes
samijey · 2 years ago
Note
I have mentioned the Bloodline Storyline to someone I know who was once in a biker gang and as he put it "If someone were welcomed into the gang openly when everyone else there had to be beaten into it, I could totally see why the people who got beaten in would despise the new guy." And I think about that a lot for how much Jey resented Sami's place early on. Sami not only wasn't tied down, but his willingness to submit of his own free will, and how that got him a spot -- that frustrated Jey so much... but then Sami, be it because he wasn't 'beaten into the gang' or not, still maintained that sense of innocence and sunshine, and Jey couldn't help but fall in love. He loved it in Sami just as much as he missed it in himself and God I just have so many feelings about them, aaaaaaaaaaaaa.
YEA YEA YEAAA EXACTLY YOU'VE PUT IT PERFECTLY AND NOW I NEED SEVERAL MOMENTS
Tumblr media
22 notes · View notes
my-thoughts-and-junk · 4 months ago
Text
once again thinking about how karl heisenberg from re8 sounds like if astarion were doing a really bad elvis impression
6 notes · View notes
passerinesoncaffeine · 4 months ago
Text
GOD. I AM OBSESSED WITH HIM.
#AUUUUGH. HE HAS INVADED MY BRAIN WHAT IS HIS PROBLEM.#YES THIS IS ABOUT BASIL#JESUS chRIST#I DONT NEED TO STUDY HIM UNDER A MICROSCOPE I NEED TO DISSECT HIM!!!!!#I NEED TO TEAR HIM TO SHREDS BUT ALSO GIVE HIM A HUG BUT ALSO#FFFUCK. so needless to say#omori spoilers#ahead#WHY DOES HE GIVE ME EMOTIONS. WHY IS HE LIKE THIS.#like jesus its always the character thats ready to sacrifice themselves for someone they barely even talk to but they meant so much to them#that every memory they had of them before things turned for worse made them protect them anyways and only stayed alive because they knew#that dying would only cause this person more pain then theyve already been given and that would defeat the purpose of their entire#will to live. god. he needs therapy#and anxiety medication holy shit#HE WAS 12!!1!!! HE WAs FUCkING 12!! FUCK#okay but Im also impressed like. you were 12. and you got away with it. like was there no autopsy?? did they hide the wounds?? ANYWAYS#IM NO FUCKING OKAY#“they're comfortable. simple modest and perfect.” AUUUGH.#bitch got decapitated in an elevator#final words “I think I'm stuck :/”#absolute legend (im sobbing on the floor)#omori only saves hs basil when he knows he can reset it all and forget again#stranger isnt as aggressive when hes facing the truth doNT EVEN GET ME STARTED ON STRANGER#“on that day when you became nothing I was split in half. which do you think was more painful?”#AAHAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.#AAAAAAAAAA.#tHAT IS SO FUCKING VAGUE HONEY WHAT DOES THAT MEAN#is he referring to the existence of stranger?? or sunny being a part of him?? IS IT SOMETHING ELSE???#THE FUCKING LORE YOU CAN MAKE UP ABOUT THIS GAME#STRANGER HONEY. CLARIFY. PLEASE. BUT ALSO DONT THIS IS HALF THE FUN
2 notes · View notes
wickedhawtwexler · 7 months ago
Text
the most frustrating situation you can be in as a writer is knowing something about your story Does Not Work but having no idea what it is or why
6 notes · View notes
fullmetal-scar-simping · 4 months ago
Text
It's funny when someone responds to you claiming you're just repeating their point, meanwhile they missed the part where I talked about them failing to grasp that being upset about the Nazi association to Amestris while saying all fascism is bad and that the Nazi association means people have "misunderstood" the moral of fma and thus "proves Arakawa's" point is attributing ignorance to the critics while falsely claiming Arakawa's work as consistently anti-military (it absolutely isn't).
But I shouldn't be surprised.
5 notes · View notes