#my life has never been the same since the moment classmate bestie clocked me as a living wattpad fanfic back in january 24

[jackbabewang]

Genre: Veeeeery slight angst, Fluff, Best friends to lovers

Word count: 3,050

Being together is that—

No matter how many days, weeks, months, or years go by, keep every promises made.

a/n: heavily listened to coming home while writing this, maybe you should too

When we first met

Jaehyun was the kind of person who endeared himself to everyone who knew him and you were swept off your feet the first time you saw him, roaming the corridors looking for your new classroom where they’d been relocated in the beginning of each year. The school personnel had this system going on ever since the dramatic increase in the number of students and to suit the new batch of each grade, or simply cause of the Pungsu-Jiri (Korea’s Geomancy or Feng Shui) thingy. Yeah, it was kind of unnecessary. 

Given plenty of time to break away from each other’s gazes if you wanted to, but neither did even with your feet continued walking yourselves in the opposite direction. 

How could anyone have such warm brown eyes as those? It was virtually impossible! 

Jaehyun changed your whole life as you knew it. You became best of friends, and whispered to each other on every occasion possible.

Twenty minutes into the class you spent sipping your Coke with your head bent, under the desk, behind the erected textbook to shield yourself. 

History teachers were obsessed with things that weren’t there any more. They lived in the past and expected us to want to live there too. You couldn’t imagine that any history lesson can be a thrill a minute, but with Mr. Lee in command, the expression ‘to die for’ took on a whole new meaning. Mostly everyone sat there sighing and thinking, “Why are the clock hands moving so slowly, has the battery committed suicide?” Mr. Lee was a very boring teacher. You meant very boring. He looked boring and sounded boring and everything he said was boring. He was Mr. Boring-Boring, Sir Boringest, Lord Boring of Boring-in-the-Brain. He droned on and on and on about nothing you wanted to know, then wrote it all on the board and told us to copy it down, or write an essay on it, or ask him questions. He didn’t get many questions, mainly because no one had been listening or trying to read his crabby handwriting.

SLUUUURP— 

Reaching the bottom of your cup, though not too loudly, just loudly enough so that Mr. Lee, standing in the front, a few feet away, could hear you. 

“Who was that?” he roared, his eyes darting everywhere, scanning everyone, until they settled on you. 

Instinct was not about being the smartest, but it was about being in tune with your inner drive and you turned to your only friend. He first eyed you with confusion, then gave a questioning look over the top of his glasses

“Jung Jaehyun!” 

At the call of his name, his jaw dropped, eyes widened with disbelief, frustrated and full of rage at being your scapegoat. This girl! She’ll be the death of me. 

In the end, you compensated for your mistake by flashing him the widest smile in your footlocker collection of smiles.

The beginning: Promise of the youth

During the summer holiday, you secured a part-time job at a rental record store. Jaehyun would sometimes visit and you would play the newest music out dancing and clowning around when there were no customers in the store. 

“Hey, tell you something. That guy at the counter-” 

Jaehyun tilted his curious head to the direction of the said individual, not caring that the man would notice the two youngsters were openly discussing him. 

“Don’t be so obvious, idiot!” Your nudge turned him back to you, “He’s the store manager. Apparently he first met his wife here and they’ve been together since then. Believe it or not, it’s been fifteen years! Isn’t that amazing? I can’t believe anyone can fall in love for such a long time!” 

“You sure are a mathematician. And nosy.”

“I’m an expert when it comes to this.”

“Should put it into good use instead. Like, what? Education?”

“Shut up.”

When you met them, you didn’t understand what held them together. You remembered thinking, This is really an odd couple! After spending some time with them and learning their story, it all made sense. He was her anchor, and she was his ultimate challenge; but more than that, they genuinely seemed to love one another. 

“Gosh, I can't imagine how I'd be like when I'm thirty…” 

It was always the future—a perfectly vague, indefinite future that terrifies you. You wished you could stay like this forever, young forever, happy forever. Your needs are simple, far more so than the needs of an adolescent or adult. Just think of a child, laughing at the least thing that catches its fancy, the image of himself or herself in a mirror, or the way a family pet behaves. 

Here you have Jaehyun, the secret source of your happiness. 

His voice broke in upon your thoughts, “Thirty-year-old unmarried woman… There're tons of them!” 

“Thirty— I don’t want to be that—” You shuddered, fighting back waves of panic at the image of an old lady alone with too many cats. “If I’m still single at thirty, you have to marry me.” 

Your abruptness caught him off guard. He didn’t speak for a moment but there was a glint of mockery in his eyes, a mischievous smirk played on the corners of his lips, as if he wasn’t taking you any less seriously for it. 

“What kind of reaction is that?” So you nudged him in the ribs, laughing all the more when he made an overly dramatic wince. 

“I want to have a Harry Potter themed wedding… A sunflower bouquet… Ooh, and you know what? I’m gonna abandon the heels, they’re going to kill me!” 

He chuckled. What a lady. 

“How about you? Tell me about your dream wedding.” 

“That would be marrying the love of my life.” Then he grinned. The indentations in his cheeks called dimples, making his smile heart-meltingly sweet. His eyes crinkled almost closed when he smiled, too. 

“You’re boring.” 

“What were you expecting? Dyeing my hair blonde or pink or purple?”

“That would be nice too.” 

She fell in love

“Jung Jaehyun!” You shouted his name and started waving frantically. He recognized your voice immediately despite the muffling effect of your scarf. And his heart dropped to his feet when you barely checked the road for cars before you went streaking across it. 

Next to him was a guy you’d never met before. He was about the same height as Jaehyun, his right ear a bit pointed like an elf’s, and with a face like that, you damn sure would’ve remembered.

Grinning broadly, “This is my classmate, Sicheng.” 

“Hi.” As he spoke Korean with his delicate Chinese accent, the words dripped from his lips like honey. 

“And she is-” 

With a warm smile and you introduced yourself, interrupting whatever Jaehyun might have added. Though you’re already telling him of information which was much not needed.

“Oh… You both are-”

“We’re besties!” 

“We’re heading to the cafe for awhile, do you want to join us?” 

“Sure!” 

Then you fell for him and discovered that when it comes to romance, intelligence takes a back seat to stupidity. Jaehyun half agreed, half disagreed. To him, you’re always the latter even before your blind infatuation.

Cupid, that little rascal, had already fired his arrow into your heart and had no intention of letting you escape this magical feeling. And that’s how you described the whole theory of ‘Love at first sight’ to Jaehyun, who’d probably known it better than you did.

Then, she had her first heartbreak. 

“We broke up…” You showed up unannounced on his doorstep crying bitterly only for him to drag you to the courtyard, away from his dormitory where you wouldn’t be seen or heard wailing like a toddler who had lost her lollipop, where you wouldn’t be causing disturbance to the neighbouring students, and where he wouldn’t be mistaken for the one that shattered your heart into fragments. 

“He said I never stopped talking, said I talked too fast. He pretended he couldn’t understand Korean and talked shit about me in his Ching-Chong language. He said I’m annoying and loud…” You paused long enough to take a breath, and felt more tears streaming down your face. “Am I... Am I really that annoying?” 

Something about your current state made him want to pick you up and tenderly wrap you in a blanket of protection. It was laughable to hear you whining about ‘the Chinese guy’ you once fell head over heels for. He was trying hard to control his smile that wanted to show on his face, and shook his head instead. “No, not at all.”

“Am I loud?” 

Though afraid to fuel your outburst, “Sometimes…” It was a fact. 

“I am not loud…” You spun around and stomped toward the bench, your lips pouted in misery and your head placed in the south right now. 

When he patted your back in a futile attempt to calm you, you moved after his hand in double time. “Stop patting me…” A few incoherent mumbles of him being the annoying one instead, then, “Jung Jaehyun! If I’m still single at thirty, you have to marry me.” 

“You always say that.” 

“You need to swear it this time.” Wanting him to stay true to his words, you held his right hand up.

“Swear, what?” 

You rolled your glossy eyes and exhaled a breath in exaggerated impatience. Was he dumb or dumb?

“If I’m still single at thirty, Jung Jaehyun will have to marry me!” 

As he repeated, “If I’m still single at thirty, Jung Jae-”

“No!” You scolded and whacked him on the arm. “Idiot…” 

An uncontrollable smile stretched across your face as you slowly relaxed. He stared at you for a moment, grinning faintly, an amused glint in his eyes. There was magic in you, he decided. 

You slumped back into the bench, your eyes staring into space, your mind numb. Unshed tears blurred your vision and you caught the warm drops that slipped past with the backs of your hands. Naturally, you reached over and rubbed them on his jacket to try to wipe away the traces of madness. He never complained, of course. 

“You know… You do have a superpower…”

“What is it?”

“The superpower of making my tears disappear…”

As soon as the words left your mouth, you regretted them. Talk about being a charmer. “That’s gross…”

Chill crawled down your spine and he mimicked your shiver. “You are gross.” 

Long time no see

At eleven o’clock, files for the meeting laid in front of him that he probably wouldn’t even notice his phone buzzing. He looked down at the familiar caller ID flashing on the screen. 

Without thinking twice he picked up the call. 

Immediately connected through the line, your piercing cry blasted his ear. “He said he wanted to break up with me…” Unbeknownst to yourself that it was so loud the people next to him could hear you. He smiled at his colleagues apologetically and quickly excused himself from the room. 

He found what he guessed to be an unused room, hidden away down a relatively quiet corridor. Then he leaned against the wall with his arms crossed and one ankled hooked over the other. Even though he couldn’t see your face at the moment, he could paint a perfect picture of tears streaming down your face, snot hanging on your nose. 

“Okay, okay. Stop crying.” Jaehyun was laughing. You took no notice, but went on crying. The more you cried the more he laughed. Your sobs, like fulminations, were thunderous. “You’ve gotten stronger, you know that?”

“Huh? … What?”

“I said. Your howling has gotten stronger.” 

“No, it didn’t. Bastard.” 

“I’m in the middle of a meeting right now. Talk to you later.” 

Though the phone call was cut short, it made you feel much better. Instead of hogging him on, you decided to leave him a text message, saying, “Thanks for making my tears disappear.” It was that corny line again, that he couldn’t help but grin upon reading. 

“Hangout this weekend?” He replied.

Saturday of that week 

Jaehyun offered to pick you up at your place. 

“Hey.” 

It still hadn’t completely sunk in that how much you’d matured in the last few years. Medium height, you had long dark hair, which you’d forego your full bangs, soft romantic curls looked shiny and healthy, as did your skin. He could tell from the way your outfit moved along with your body that you had a woman’s figure with lots of curves. 

“It’s been awhile,” you started. 

Staring at you too much would be creepy though, awkwardly he put his hand up with a smile, he ushered you into the passenger seat and got behind the wheel of his car and drove off. 

“Broke up again?” 

“I’m okay. It’s not the first time for me.” 

He glanced over at you a time or two, perhaps worried, but you didn’t seem to be mad or crying. As he was about to speak, your cell phone’s high-pitched ringtone crashed into the conversation, shattering the moment in an instant. 

Incoming call: Jerk

“It’s him- He’s calling! Should I pick up? Should I?” 

“If you want to-” Once again he got interrupted as he was trying to talk some sense into you.

“Hello?” “What is it?” “Didn’t we break up already? Why are you still calling me?” ”You’re freaking weird. Why are you apologizing all of a sudden?” 

During your phone conversation, Jaehyun cast a rather wary glance at you before dragging his eyes back to the road. 

“Alright… I’m not mad anymore…” 

Upon listening to whatever you’re saying, though piece by piece, it sounded like you’re back together and things would be great again. After all, it was just the typical bickering between a couple. 

With a final assurance to your not-an-‘ex’-anymore that all was well and you really weren’t mad anymore, the call ended. Just as if reading your mind, Jaehyun shook his head in disbelief while you only grin at him sheepishly. At least the rest of the hangout could be enjoyed with none of pouting and sulking, you thought. 

Another six months

Jaehyun’s phone alerted him to a text, it was frank 

I’m getting engaged soon

Will hand over the invitation card when we meet next time

Two sentences of such simple words—as something bound to be, and bound to happen. Yet it left an impact on him. He swallowed to alleviate the tightening in his throat, but the feeling followed him, peaking and then fading, falling as petals fluttering from a dying bloom. For a second prior, he was really, truly happy for you. 

Somewhere on the other side, you felt a tremendous emotional effect after clicking your phone shut following the message delivered. Something ran over your head, and maddeningly ran through again and again. What was wrong? 

In a disoriented state of mind, you began rummaging through drawers and cabinets until you found the box you wanted. You pulled it out and opened it, revealing a stack of picture squares, a two carrot ring, and finally a limited edition Hamburglar figurine that both you and Jaehyun were lucky enough to redeem. The set of eyes stared dumbly at you as you silently gazed at the little thing that managed to hold such fond memories. 

Meanwhile, Jaehyun had always had the figurine with him, laid on his workstation somewhere visible so that he continued to be reminded by it. Too, he was fixated on the pair of acrylic painted eyes in remembrance of the past. 

The day before 30th 

Jaehyun had been waiting for you inside a cafe situated a block from the deadly intersection, sipping on a glass of iced latte, though the weather was nothing sort of a torrid summer. 

Upon agreeing to the meet up, he had sorted everything out in his mind and promised himself to confront you with a good-natured congratulation on your marriage none other than a dear friend should. 

Less than ten minutes later, you appeared on the other side of the glass, waving and smiling brightly. Pitter-patter of the rain drops hitting your umbrella steadily intensify as did something else… 

“Hi,” he greeted with a dimpled grin, and then wiping the back of his hand across his mouth, a smear of coffee on his chin when you snatched up his glass and took a long swallow. Again, he said nothing about your behavior that he had gotten used to, only glaring at you with the ever same expression of This girl! She’ll be the death of me. 

“Invitation card,” he said, reminding you what all this was about in the first place. 

But so nonchalantly, you uttered, “We broke up.” 

Your eyes caught the slight lift in the right corner of his lips, Jaehyun unable to stop a small smile from making it onto his face. Simultaneously, his brows raised in surprise. 

“You didn’t cry?”

Almost proud of yourself, “No.” 

“Lies.”

“Really,” you continued with the realization of the fact that, “Liking and loving someone is different.” 

Jaehyun convinced himself, to the bone, that you’re okay. Assimilating that you’d indeed matured to understand how relationship works instead of diving in blindly on the spur of the moment by acting upon emotional states like a teenage girl in love. Emotion comes and goes, rises and falls. Certainly, love doesn’t last forever. But the foundation of love is commitment, and he wished you’d learned that as well because… 

“Do you remember what day it is tomorrow?” your calm voice interrupted his chain of thoughts, as you stared at him in anticipation. 

“Of course I do. It’s your 30th birthday tomorrow.” 

Grinning and beaming with unbridled glee, for once you bet on your bold self saying that, “So, you still remembered our promise then.” 

As if he had been waiting for years, thought he was ready, but was somewhat embarrassed and gave you a warm, shy smile. The once dying bloom came back to life, thriving, lush and flourishing. The pent up feeling on that one, great heart, burst forth in an uncontrollable, deafening shout. 

“Tell me,” you coaxed his trigger to give his word of honour. 

“If you’re still single at thirty…” Nervously, he gulped and avoiding your intent eyes. “I’ll have to marry you.”

“You must keep your promise, Jung Jaehyun.” 

[bubbe-boo]

Like I promised.

The ringback tone was kept ringing out on the other side and ended up with her high-pitched voice saying, “Hey, it’s Boo! Can’t talk right now. Leave a message.”.

I sighed, closing my eyes in exasperation while my hand still held the phone in my ear. Then, I went ahead with the same message I had been repeating for the past half hour. “Hey, Boo… Where are you?” I threw my head backward in desperation. “It’s 7’O clock. In case you forget, we need to complete the assignment. I do not care if you call me a nerd again. If I am gonna lose my grade for this, I will accept it as an invitation to kill you.”

I collapsed into the sofa and threw the phone aside. Looking up at the ceiling, all I can think about is her. Boo, my best friend, my classmate whom I have known since I was a toddler, and my secret love that she has never gotten a grip on.  I got a crush on her since we were in middle school. The feeling of fear was stronger than I thought, which made me reluctant to express my feelings to her. There was a time she told me she does not believe in so-called Love. I often stopped myself from saying that because I didn’t want to lose her from my life.

At least she is with me now.

She had dated a lot of guys at school and every time they broke her heart, she ended up crying on my shoulder. I was a painkiller for her, a protector, and a strong best friend, and she was my comfort zone, a freedom space, and there are a lot of emotions that I could not express about her. Around her, I was being myself. I think that is a great quality about her. She does not judge people by their looks and will free to give them a second chance.

The bell rang loudly, which made me startle slightly. I rush to the door to open it, and I had this hope in my head that this would be Boo. If this is her, I swear I will kill her for not answering my calls. The force I put on the doorknob was enough to find out the anger inside me. I threw open the door to see her standing outside with an apologetic smile on her lips. My anger washed away the minute my eyes met her. I know I could not resist her. Her hair was messy and dripping wet, her eyes were heavy like she is on the edge of hitting the sack, and her face was pale and tired. And to add insult to an injury, she was all soaked wet, and the blue hoodie she was wearing was glued to her body.

“Hey, Bestie.” Her pleasing smile got wider.

“Don’t Bestie me, Boo!” I said as I crossed my hands and put back my angry face.

“Calm down, Aaron!” She pouted. “I am here like I promised.”

"Where have you been?" I look out for her car and looked back at her when I could not find it near my site. “Where is your car? And why are you soaking wet?”

“My car broke down on the street, and it was raining.” She shrugged. Even though the answer was not convincing, I just nodded. “Are you not gonna invite me in?” One of her eyebrows flew up with that question.

I did not mutter a word and move aside, so she came inside with a cocky smile. Both her hands were tightly crossed across her chest, and she was trembling slightly. I shook my head and went to my room, then opened and took a towel from my cupboard.

“Why you didn’t call me back?” I asked as I held out the towel to her. She snatched the towel from my hand and begin to gently blot her hair. She turned her head upside down, running her fingers through it, and she gave me a quick glance.

When she did not mutter anything, I continued. “I called you like...” I paused for a moment, pretending to calculate something. “Yeah… A thousand times.” I put my hands on the hips, and my sharpening eyes pointed at her.

“I know you will call me.” She spoke. “I lost my phone on the way. Not sure where it was.” She holds out her hands in a helpless way, showing how much she was sorry for being idiotic.

She slowly approached me and hugged me tightly as if I had been away for a long time. It was unexpected and odd. I got afraid first of that emotion. A feeling that she was going to miss me so much.  Because she had never hugged me so intensely like this before, it felt different. So, different. I hugged her tightly and closed my eyes as her head pressed against my chest.

“What happened?” I whispered, running my one hand on her back gently.

“Thank you, Aaron.” She whispered back. Her voice vibrated on my chest.

“For what?” I asked as we broke the hug and looked at each other. Her greenish-brown eyes stared back at mine with admiration.

“For being so nice to me. I am so grateful for you.”

I looked into her eyes. Even though it felt heavy there are still those sparkling vibes. “Do you need something to eat or drink? You look miserable today.”

She laughed at my comment and shook her head. “No, I am good.” She spoke. “Can we do our assignment ASAP? Cause, I gotta go somewhere else after this.”

“Sure!” I nodded, and we went together to my room.

We sat in bed for about two hours, with several books and a bunch of papers around. We went through a lot of research over and over again. When I looked at her, I could see the amount of earnestness and impatience she has put on her face. She constantly writes down something in the book, aggressively scratches it away, and writes something again.

If the distraction is a disease, I was drowned by it. My whole attention was on her. Her bottom lip stayed between her lips while she thought about something and her eyes narrowed at some words in the books. I had this sudden urge to kiss her so badly. To taste those pink lips so fucking badly. I want to know what it tastes like. I love her fucking so much.

“Hey, Boo,” I called her gently, yet, she did not lift her head but hummed under her breath, and her eyes have been entirely devoted to the assignment.

“I need to tell you something.” My heart was thumping against my chest so badly, and I had this thought that my heart was going to fall out of my chest. I swallowed and looked at her face again.

“Go on… I am all ears.” She was still on her assignment.

“I think… I am…” I swallowed as she looked at me, causing me completely tongue-tied by her crystal eyes. For a moment, I forgot the words I intended to say. Now, it was completely empty.

“You what?” She asked me, analyzing the panic on my face. “What happened, Aaron? Did anyone hurt you?” The concern in her voice was purely visible outside.

“No…” I shook my head and was about to say it but she cut off me by…

“Is there any problem in your family?” Her arched eyebrows pulled together and horizontally reclined as she asked that question.

“No…” I shook my head and then…

She crossed her arms, “Is that the stupid neighbor again?”

“No, Boo!” I shouted and placed my arms over her shoulder in an impulse, I said, “I love you! I fucking love you… I love you so much.” I put both palms over her cheeks as she stared back at me like I am some kind of a fantasy character in her books that came out of nowhere.

After looking at her face, I finally understood she was completely shocked at my sudden confession. At that moment, I realized, I messed up.

Great job, Aaron.

“Boo, I- .”

“Why you didn’t tell me earlier when I was by your side?” There was a pain in her tone, and I could not move my mouth when I heard that question. What should I say to her?

“Why?” She asked me again as she helplessly tilted her head. I see no fury, shock, or surprise, on the other hand, all I saw was the pain and numbness.

“Because I was a coward,” I admitted the truth. I was so afraid that I might lose her and she will never be going to talk to me again. “I was looking for a chance, Boo. I was so scared…”

She did not mutter a word, and neither did I. She looked at me as if she was in a trance, staring at me but not staring at me at all. We just sat close and looked at each other in complete silence. A drop of tears rolled down her cheek. Did I just make her cry? What have I done now?

I wiped the hot tears off her cheek. “Please don’t cry.”

My phone rang loudly from the couch in the hall. I sighed, pushed myself to my feet, and shuffled to the hall area. I noticed my phone carelessly lying on the couch, and the name Boo flashed across my phone.

“Boo, It’s your number. Seems someone got your phone.”

 I looked upstairs for a response from her side, but there was none. I know she is still in shock, and bold of me to assume she will come downstairs for this. I took my phone, swiped across the screen, and held it over my ears.

“Hello?”

“Hello, Aaron?” A sharp, bold voice of a woman rose from the other side.

“Yes, you are calling from my…” I stopped for a moment. “Friends’ phone.”

“I know, Aaron.” The woman said with so much concern. “This is LAPD.”

“Oh…” That was the only thing that came out of my mouth. I did not have a clue what to say next. This is just a typical me.

“I am sorry, kid.” The woman said. “There has been an accident near the bridge and the car was completely wrecked into pieces.”

“Okay…” My heartbeat went faster. Is Boo in any trouble? “Why are you saying this to me?”

“Because I got this phone near this car.” She spoke. There was a slight hesitation in her voice. “And I am afraid that the girl… Your friend… is dead.” She paused for a moment and could almost hear the breath I was taking into my body. “I am so sorry.”

“What do you mean she is dead?” I asked in fury. “Is this some kind of sadist joke? She just talke-”

My words were cut short by a sudden realization. The phone in my hand slid down between my fingers and shattered on the floor. I quickly ran through the stairs and threw the door open to find out no one was there except for a piece of paper on the desk, and its edges were moving slightly by the wind coming from the open window. My shaking hands took the paper carefully and…

“I love you too, Aaron. But it was too late because I was a coward too.”

I pinched my eyes in pain and clutched the letter to my chest. Now everything makes sense. That hug she gave me, that tears in her eyes while I admitted it, and that question “Why you didn’t tell me earlier days when I was with you?”.

Now it all makes sense.

It took me a while to realize that this was happening and that it was all real. The worst thing was knowing the truth that she was gone. Something was choking me inside, and it hurt me like hell. I sharply kneeled to the floor. Tears came out of my eyes. I looked at that piece of paper once more and cried.

She loved me but I was too late.

She is gone.

Boo is gone.