#by sending an ask like dis 4 example ^_^

[utilitycaster]

After that final scene I was just like oh so C3 was just the Keyleth story then. We were just with the background characters to her story. It is just something to me that BH didn't even get the final scene in their own campaign. Like Godkiller was just B story to Keyleth's A story that we didn't see. Just some parts of the BH story Keyleth sends Orym on a mission, call Keyleth to heal Launda, Keyleth back up at the key to save the day, Keyleth's former lover comes and becomes a ball, gotta heal Keyleth from her poison, Keyleth has a friend at the shattered teeth etc. This is not meant as a Keyleth hate ask or anything I hope it isn't coming off as that.

I disagree, or rather, at times that did happen but I do not think it was the intent going in.

I think that Keyleth getting involved with Laudna's death was really the point where this campaign took a downturn from which it never recovered, and I will admit as someone who enjoyed Orym I remain kind of like "Liam, this was the idea that stuck in your head for 4 years?" but I think a lot of this was like...Bells Hells not really having anything they wanted or cared about enough to pursue so you did have to lean on the past characters, who were intentionally brought in. I think the reason you might feel this way is that like...again, there weren't really consequences or strong connections from Bells Hells, whereas Keyleth as a character from C1 was awash in those consequences and connections. So, for example, the mission to get the flowers actually was in my opinion a good fetch quest...but Otohan mysteriously never used that poison on the PCs despite killing four of them on separate occasions, so it felt like Keyleth was real and they were shadows in their own narrative, moving through it but largely unaffected. The Shattered Teeth was a fun peek at a new part of the world but the only real outcome was them getting the shards; they didn't like, connect with this location or think about it meaningfully, so again, Keyleth feels more real as someone with actual memories and connection to it.

As for Vax coming back: I think it's truly one of the weakest choices made in the history of actual play and I listen and watch a LOT of actual play but (and I could be wrong, and if this was an intended endgame my opinion will dip further) it feels like the option where Bells Hells leaves Predathos sealed or the one where the gods are eaten would not end in this result. I think if the Raven Queen is destroyed Vax simply dies; one could argue he rejoins a cycle of death and rebirth now but without him being consecuted I think that means he has no knowledge of who he was in his next life, as in most real-world reincarnation beliefs; and if the gods never have to flee and Predathos remains sealed then the situation continues as it always has. We happened to get that ending, but, at least I hope, it was not an inevitability.

[makeitagood0neao3]

Weather Me To Nothing (1/4)

Pairing: Dark!Paul Atreides x Female!Reader

Word Count: 3,916

Summary: Reader is the heir to the throne with an impossible choice to make. Torn between protecting her sisters and finding her way in the universe, will she make the right choice?

Warnings: Dark!Paul Atreides. 18+ only! Explicit sexual content. Arranged Marriage. Non con. See tags for more.

A/N: Welcome and enjoy! Comment and kudos are always welcome <3 Crumble like a temple built from future daughters, To wasteland when the oceans recede.

Read Part 2

The chamber is so quiet, the heels of your shoes echo off the walls as you approach the throne. He is sitting on his gold throne, the House Corrino crest behind him. The lion is bright, making you blink hard as it reflects the light simulating daylight. Behind you, the heavy doors that offer complete privacy clang shut, sealing you in. The hall is nearly empty with only his most trusted advisors and Mentats present. A controlled amount of witnesses. As a child, the sight of the Padishah Emperor Shaddam IV would stop you in your tracks until your mother swept you into her arms and carried you to him. As his eldest child, you were a representation of not only the House, but your younger sisters as well. Now an adult, every movement you make it watched, hesitations noted. Should the tempo of your gait falter, it will be documented. You father still fills the room, though not in size. You once imaged him as huge, the size of Baron Vladimir Harkonnen.

Your father has aged. Perhaps only you can see how his shoulders slump in his chair, though you know his physicality is not a representation of his power. Even now, as you pass by scattered members of his court, you can sense their tension, their straight spines and clenched jaws. He doesn’t need to raise his hand to strike anyone down, including you. When your mother died, he made you an example of your sister’s behavior in front of his followers. The last time you were here just mere weeks ago was the most furious you’ve ever seen him, though his wrath didn’t end in physical punishment.

Playing the long game, he knew to keep you waiting on your planet. Day by day with your toes in the warm sand on the shore, night by night kept distracted from your studies and instead obsessing over this moment, waiting for the moment he would call upon you to return. The Emperor is always a step ahead and you’ve always been clumsy.

Impulsive. Insolent. A disgrace.

You keep your gaze low, though your chin level, every click of your heel is a countdown until you are in front of him. You half bow, a sign of respect, though you have none for the man. When you meet his gaze, you ensure a light smile is on your lips, as if happy to see him. He meets you with the same grin, the crows feet around his eyes deepening. You learned as a child that his throne is also a stage. A place where he can play any role he chooses.

The forgiving Emperor. The doting father. The aging fanatic.

“Daughter. Thank you for arriving so quickly. I hate to take you away from your studies.”

“I answer every call from my Emperor and father,” you smile back. Knowing he wants to hear this above all else, you assure him of your loyalty to him and his empire.

“I have been reflecting on your most recent transgressions against this family and I believe I have found a way for you to atone.”

“I ask again, where is the evidence of this transgression?” You challenged lightly.

You still don’t agree that sending an anonymous warning to Duke Leto that his mission on Arrakis was an attack on his family and House was a transgression. Treason against the Emperor, yes. No one in this court had proof it was you, except for your outspoken disagreement before him and his council. It took hours to slip away from your guards and lure the transmissions Mentat away from his post. The message was sent, but it seems too late. He was reported dead before dawn.

He lowers his chin, his angular face pointing at you like a bird of prey, ready to snatch you from the spot with his talons. It takes everything in your to keep your hands still at your sides, to not pick or clench your fingers. Behind you, the sound of the heavy doors open. You don’t take your eyes off of the predator in front of you, though, a coy smile on your lips. Heavy footsteps echo as the visitors approach. Refusing to give into him, you keep your gaze fixed ahead.

“You have been of age for quite some time. As my oldest daughter, I have saved your union for a worthy ally. I have found the most loyal of them to strengthen the empire!” He says this with enthusiasm, deep in his deluded belief. Everything he does is to strengthen his position.

Your smile falters, lips pressed tightly as you clasp your hands together in front of you, hoping to prevent them from shaking. You knew this was coming, one day. Though as the least poised and submissive daughter in his line, you doubted he would risk marrying you off with an ally. Keen on keeping your nose in books and studies on your quiet planet, you have successfully avoided meeting most eligible matches while portraying the attitude of aloof. Most of the wealthy bachelors don’t want to work too hard to woo someone smarter than them. Someone who has everything and is impressed by nothing. You have tried to instill this in your younger sisters to no avail.

His pleased expression is not enough to convince you that this is not a punishment. Atonements in House Corrino are paid in blood. Duke Leto atoned for his House’s success in the empire with his. Your mother paid for it when she died in child labor. Though you share a bloodline with the Emperor, you are subject to the same kind of cruelty.

The footsteps are loud and thunderous before the stop directly behind you, an ominous shadow. You can feel their gaze on your back, but you are too afraid to see who it is. Too afraid of giving your father the satisfaction of your dismay on your face. To your right, a large form invades your space, standing so his shoulder nearly grazes yours.

At least a head taller than you, the brother of the beast, Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen. He’s lean, made of chiseled muscle built to slaughter his enemies. His pale skin is contrasted by his black armor. His hairless head emphasizes his deep set black eyes. He doesn’t spare you a glance, instead keeping his attention on the Emperor. You turn back to your father, eyes wide as you shake your head. Always ready with a quip, you are truly speechless. This man killed his own father and not known for his brain, but his brutality.

This is the man your father settles you with?

“Feyd-Rautha has come a long way, Y/N.”

“Father-”

“How is the Dune, Feyd?”

“Spice production is higher than ever, thanks to the harvesters you delivered, Emperor.” It comes out in a rasp, mimicking the sound of his uncle’s voice without the depth.

Dune. You hated that fucking planet having spent an entire standard year there as punishment for something you can’t even remember. The moon the locals referred to as The Hand Of God prevented you from communicating with your sisters while there. Completely excommunicated, when the sun set, you were expected to dine with Vladimir and his kin and most nights you did.

On the rare occasion he wasn’t present, he left you alone with Feyd-Rautha. Neither of them kept it secret that they desired you to join the Harkonnen family permanently. Vladimir complimented your intelligence and strategic mind, while assuring you that your figure could carry and birth a healthy army of great nephews for him.

When your sentence was complete, you left with your skin hot and dry, without so much as a glance back. Upon your arrival, you nearly begged your father to never send you back. He gave you his word so long as you understood your place was behind him and his decisions, you were free from Arrakis.

To keep you from further embarrassing him and his legacy, he sent you on the sabbatical you had currently been on. Out of the way, out of sight, out of mind.

“Do you plan on staying on Arrakis or does your uncle’s business require you on Giedi Prime?”

“I will remain on Arrakis to ensure the production of Spice doesn’t stop. My brother has other responsibilities. My priority right now is to find the remaining members of House Atreides.” There’s a layer of humor in his tone. As if he isn’t standing before one of the most terrifying men in the universe. Perhaps he doesn’t believe he is.

Your head snaps to look at him. For being on a desert planet the majority of his life, he words are cold, lifeless. He would kill anyone his uncle told him to and not contemplate any differently. This man took on three of the best Harkonnen slave fighters in a gladiator game recently and left the arena without a scratch.

A marriage to Feyd-Rautha would mean a lifetime of breeding on a planet so hot it could kill you within two hours in the sand without a Stillsuit. The Harkonnen home planet is no better. Time passes slower, a standard year is almost three of that on Arrakis. It’s heavily industrialized, without oceans or forests. A heavy layer of fog covers the planet, blocking out the stars. If there are any visible nearby. Juxtaposed to the quiet sounds of shifting sand on Arrakis, their planet is loud and booming. No. That is not a life you can live.

“Be sure when you find the son, he is not injured. The other houses in the Empire are not pleased with the way they were handled. There has been chatter amongst them. We don’t want to give them more to talk about.”

An Emperor, no matter how powerful, is nothing without followers. Two Houses are nothing against the legions of the known universe.

“What will you do when you find him?” I ask, curious as to what his fate will be if he isn’t going to kill him.

“Prepare him for your wedding ceremony, of course.” This stuns me and at my stillness, Feyd-Rautha turns to face me. You don’t move, unable to comprehend the strategy of this game. “You are to be married to Paul Atreides. Imagine my surprise when we found out he was alive. I was further surprised when he asked for the hand of one of my daughters. A plea for peace and an alliance.”

“What about Irulan?”

“Irulan is the eldest. She is meant for a worthy match. You seemed to enjoy your time on Arrakis. Making allies with the local swine.”

You don’t speak, stunned for the third time in this discussion. How does he, and to what extend, does he know about your involvement with the Fremen? The help you offered was limited, they mostly refused your help, but you did what you could while there. And you were discrete, not even the Baron knew of your treachery.

Feyd narrows his eyes at you, assessing. He’s wondering why you over your sisters. The answer is simple. Your infertility makes you the perfect match for the bloodline that survived an assassination. The Atreides line will not continue if Paul weds you. Is Paul a vengeful man? What will he do to you when he finds out? Perhaps that’s the Emperor’s hope.

The hand of your father’s cruelty.

“You would give a beloved daughter to the son of the man you had murdered?”

“I like to think of it as ‘removed.’”

“It was an assassination. Who’s to say he won’t take revenge on you by killing me?” It’s the perfect solution to the problem you continue to be for him and is enough of a reason to declare war against House Atreides. He’d have the support of the whole universe.

You slump, shoulders no longer pulled back as your spine bends. The weight of your future is too heavy to hold. Your eyes drop to the floor, unable to keep them on your father, your executioner. Perhaps it’s safer with Feyd-Rautha and you can’t believe that’s the corner you've been backed into.

“That is why, dear daughter, you will kill him before he has the chance to.”

Feyd opens a pocket over his chest and pulls out a teardrop shaped vial with a blue liquid inside. It’s small in his palm as he holds it out to me. You stare at it, afraid that touching it will mean you am agreeing to this.

“This came from one of the herbalists. They found the plant deep underground on Arrakis. It’s a very old mixture that will put one into a deep sleep they won’t wake from. You are a humanitarian, so I have ensured it will be painless.” Feyd voice is kind, but you know it’s one of his manipulations. It was likely his uncle who decided on this poison.

“Is this a Bene Gesserit tincture?” You ask your father. His lips curl just slightly at the edges. You shake your head in disbelief. “I can’t kill some-”

“Your interference before is why he is still alive. A loose thread and a threat to this family, to your sisters. Imagine the pain you have caused him, by allowing him to survive.” Your father’s voice from his seat is clear and firm. It is an order you can’t deny, regardless of my convictions.

“And what will I get for this act of loyalty for my Emperor?” I ask him, countering.

He is pleased, his talons curling over the arms of the chair. He pulls himself up and walks half way down the stairs to where we stand. Still keeping the high ground, but seemingly meeting you halfway.

“You get to be free. Free to continue your studies, on whatever planet you wish, and with whomever you wish, or alone.”

It’s too good to be true. He knows being left alone and away from the politics and his bidding is all you desire. You would relinquish your name, title, everything, just for peace. You weigh the options.

If you refuse, you are forced to marry the worst the universe has to offer, forced to stay within the Emperor’s reach as he murders anyone who stands in the way of him and House Atreides. If you agree, it is painless for Paul and only one casualty has to perish. The universe will think it was the Fremen who murdered him and you can live as a widow, tainted by the Atreides heir, alone wherever you choose.

Feyd-Rautha, for once, has read you correctly. You are a humanitarian and knowing you have taken the suffering of your sisters for them, knows you will also save as many people as you can.

You turn to Feyd, palms sweaty with anxiety, and take the vial.

The harsh, unforgiving sun eclipses Dune as the Emperor’s Flagship approaches the planet. You are seated in the haul, a Sardaukar guard on either side of you. Two is light protection, but since you are traveling to a planet with almost the entirety of the Harkonnen army, they are really operating as a formal escort.

Your repeated requests to say goodbye to your sisters were denied. The Emperor commanded you to take immediate leave for Arrakis. Feyd-Rautha nearly drug you from the chamber and to his ship, the rest of his posse stomping closely behind.

You hate to admit it, but for now, Feyd is your biggest protector during this transaction. He sits across from you, his face calm as he watches you like a predator, waiting for the moment to strike. His eyes drop to your chest, where the vial of poison hands around your neck beneath your shawl. It’s cold, the glass hasn’t warmed to the temperature of your skin. You don’t expect it will, either.

Once you arrive, Feyd will escort you to Arrakeen where you will surely dine with the Baron. The day after before dawn, Fed will escort you to meet Paul at a neutral place for the ceremony. Without the chance to say goodbye to your sisters, it’s difficult to imagine seeing them again. Being sent to this desert feels like an exile this time. After you complete the task given to you, you’ll be altered, different. Will your sisters even recognize you after this?

The ship enters the atmosphere and begins descending to the ground. Several Sardaukar ships accompanied by the Harkonnen fleet have landed before you, setting a safety perimeter for the flagship to land. The ship connects with the ground and settles, your guards standing before you. You stand as well, pausing in the middle of the haul as you wait for the door to open. Feyd-Rautha is next to you, preventing the Sardaukar guard from taking his position, invading your space.

“Don’t think I am as foolish as I pretend to be,” if he had eyebrows, they’d be furrowed in his glare.

“I don’t-” Your voice is cut off by his firm hand on your bicep, causing the Sardaukar to place their hands on their swords, though they don’t draw them.

“This arrangement to the Atreides bastard is an insult to my uncle and House Harkonnen. We have done your father’s bidding for generations.”

“Then contact my father for payment.“ Furious he thinks he has the right to place his hands on you, you cannot stop venom that drips in your words.

“You will not leave this planet without me as a husband. I have waited long enough.” He says it with so much confidence. Though unpredictable, he’s never been this aggressive. What makes him think that your guard, the tactical warriors more brutal than Harkonnen’s, won’t remove every one of his extremities if he touches you?

“It’s time you let me go,” you say, though he doesn’t release you. “In more ways than one, it seems.” Your eyes drag from his to the warrior beside you, who appears ready to attack, but is hesitating. If this were anyone else, their swords would have been drawn.

Feyd-Rautha glances at the guard behind you as he leans forward, a fraction closer, before finally dropping your arm. He is testing the boundary line, waiting to be stopped. He turns and leads you out. Before following behind, you glance behind you at your guards, eyes narrowed and jaw clenched. It’s a warning to not hesitate again.

The dry and suffocating heat is immediately pressed upon you as you stop into the sun. Doing your best not to flinch at the wind cutting into your skin, you hold your chin level and keep your eyes on him. He is more impulsive than you recall, making him all the more dangerous. He’s approaching a Thropper, hundreds of Harkonnen surrounding the landing zone. They make a show of greeting you, an extension of the Emperor himself.

You call to him when he is halfway up the ramp. He stops and turns, only giving you half his physical attention. You come to a dead stop just before the ramp. Without dropping your smirk, your eyes drop to the step before meeting his. Elegantly, you pull your arm out from beneath your shawl, reaching for him. His eyes drop to your hand as he contemplates.

Though the wealthiest in the Empire, accumulating more wealth than even the Emperor, Harkonnens live in a primitive mindset. Women are not their equal nor worthy of their respect. They are warriors first, the ultimate toxic masculine. You are still a lady, however, and unable to resist knocking him down a peg in front of his warriors.

Still unsure how you will get yourself out of this without murder or marrying anyone, if Feyd-Rautha is right, and you are forced to marry him, you need his men to understand you are not a dog on leash. Their traditions don’t apply to you and you won’t be treated any differently than you currently are.

Finally, he agrees to play this game. Walking down the ramp, he steps off to the side. Once his feet are on the same ground as you, he returns the smirk and offers you his hand. You take it and step onto the ramp. His hand steadies you as you walk up before releasing you once you’re too high. Before your guard can follow, he’s on the ramp again, trailing closely behind you.

His sigh of displeasure is immediate as soon as you find your seat at the front behind the controls. He stands next to you, but you pay him no mind as you buckle yourself in.

“I insist-”

“As do I.” Not even glancing at him as you begin to flip on the overhead switches, starting the motor and engines. You take the aviation headset that rests on the steering handle and put it on. Your actions are enough to silence him, so he sits in the chair beside you, muttering something in Galach you can’t catch from beneath the headset.

The engine reverberates through the floor and sand swirls on either side of the glass when the propellers start. A guard behind you raises the ramp and when it closes, you lift off.

You didn’t think it was possible for this planet to become any more plain, but it has. Mounds of sand surround you in every direction. The spice on the top layer glimmering in the sun, reflecting it’s bright hue back to you. It’s hot even in the Thropper so you slide the shawl off of your shoulders. A fraction of your skin is on display around the thick straps of your dress.

A few hundred meters in front of you, a shimmering object catches your sight. Angling the Thropper toward it, you slow and see it’s a brand new spice harvester. The gears inside the machine tracks are free of rust and the steel casings aren’t discolored from the spice. Your father has spared no expense.

“These are bigger,” Feyd-Rautha’s voice comes through your headset. “We’ve been harvesting one and a half times more a month than ever before. Each comes with an entourage to keep the locals at bay.” His eyes are on you when you turn to look at him, but he’s focused on your shoulder. Fighting the eye roll, you turn back to the window and see two Throppers circling above the harvester, no doubt armed.

You don’t agree with the treatment of the Fremen or the aggression shown to them. This is their planet, their commodity. If anything, your father should be paying them to allow his presence here. It takes a hard people to live here, you can’t imagine ever adjusting to the effects of spice.

Even now, your heart rate speeds up and you attempt to slow your breath. The spice kicked up from the harvester is now filtering through into the Thropper, leaving you to blink hard to focus. Most experience mild hallucinations, but in the year you spent here, it just made you paranoid and unsteady. It heightened sensations and slowed your movements. How can the Harkonnen’s be so unaffected? You regain control over your mental state and continue on.

Landing at the capital, Arrakeen, your guards exit before you. Halfway down the ramp, Feyd-Rautha’s large, pale hand is extended for you to take. You accept, stepping off, and following him as he leads you towards your room. Once there, behind the closed door, you sit in the nearest chair and breathe deep, trying to steady yourself.

Read Part 2

[solixfliar]

I now love Siy, do tell more about them :)

Also HOW DID U DRAW THEM LIKE THE GAME!!

Aah, thank you for the ask (and the very kind reblog)!

I'm going to answer the drawing portion first, as I feel that will be more helpful to anyone who's curious! Siy information will be below the cut :]

The speedpaint is cropped so it can be seen better, but I've included what my full canvas looked like as well. The biggest thing for mimicking the art style was looking at the other sprites constantly. I would look at the sprites and find something close to what I was trying to draw, and then stare at that specific part while I worked. For example, Nate's hand, Everett's arm, and Jeremy's tie! Also, I blatantly copy-pasted the uniform pattern, because no way was I gonna try to recreate that 😭

Now, for a small (well, not really small) Siy lore dump under the cut! Warning for a cliche and edgy, self-indulgent OC 💖

Also, Siy sounds a lot like Pran in this, but I assure you, Siy is not inspired by Pran! They are just the XOD version of a character I already had, who happened to also have white hair and a lack of interest in speaking, LOL

Siy, full name Siy Lencten, is a new student at Saint Sarah Belle, transferring during the same year as JB. After their best friend died, Siy went completely mute, believing there was no point in talking to anyone if she wasn't around. Their parents tried everything — therapy, extracurriculars, leave from school — but nothing seemed to get through to them.

That was when Siy's older cousin, who had previously gone to Saint Sarah Belle, mentioned sending Siy there. He told Siy's parents about the strange new friendship-making groups his friends who still went there were being forced into. Siy's parents thought it would be the perfect opportunity for Siy. Maybe some time away from home and some new friends would be just what they needed.

Their parents spoke with the school, and they were placed in the Jerk Squad. Siy was not interested in new friends or fun activities, so it was honestly a bit of a relief to be placed where they were. Lynn let them sit silently with their head down as much as they wanted. What a dream, well, at first.

Eventually Lynn asked them to stay after a meeting, and gave them one of those small school whiteboards for during meetings, asking that they at least answer when asked a question. Of course, the whiteboard thing didn't go over smoothly with the other Jerks, but they all got over it eventually.

And so, yeah! They start to open up more in the second year, but they never fully come out of their shell ^^;;

Have some Siy fun facts because I love them dearly:

- Their last name is the word "Lent" is believed to have come from, meaning their name can be interpreted as Siy Lent, or silent 😭 I'm so funny 💔

- Their best friend that died is named Annabelle Eden Lee, a reference to Edgar Allan Poe's final poem.

- The first people to hear them speak are Jeremy and Pran, because Siy feels like they're the only ones who wouldn't make a big deal about it in one way or another.

- Lynn gives them a portable whiteboard with a marker holder for their first birthday with the group 🥹

- They run cold, and generally wear around 3-4 layers on warm days, and up to 6 or 7 on cold ones.

- They have heterochromia (one green eye and one blue eye), but they wear hazel contacts because they don't like attention. They chose Hazel so that if they ever say the wrong color, people won't question it 😭

- They hate JB at first because she doesn't take the hint that they want to be left alone, but eventually she grows on them <3

- They were assigned male at birth, but their parents are very supportive, even if their dad still screws up their pronouns sometimes 💀

If you read this far, have some Siy and Jeremy sketches as a treat 🫳

[donut251155]

(small disclaimer: I don't have the physical mangas on me, so the things I quote are not necessarily word for word, but it'll keep the overall meaning)

Tsukasa in the Italian version

And here I am with my analysis! I noticed the Italian side of the fandom doesn't seem particularly fond of him and wanted to figure out why

The way characters speak is important to make you get attached to a character before you figure out how they actually act - why am I mentioning this? Well, I read TBHK in two (three) languages: Italian and English (and one singular volume in Spanish a bajillion times) and I've noticed that the way Tsukasa speaks changes

Taking as an example the 19th volume, which I read in 3!!! languages, there's one panel where Tsukasa's way of speaking changes drastically from English+Spanish to Italian

In Spanish he just says "I'm proud", but there's no difference. In Italian, au contraire, he calls her a good girl. Now that lowkey creeped me out when I first saw it, BUTTTTT I have my reasons to believe that they just gave them either a childish speech (heavy on this since he died when he was 4) OR a mocking one

It shows in the 7th volume too

In Italian he says "hai finito la pappa?" - even though it still means "did you finish eating?", people his age typically don't use "pappa". "Fare la pappa" is a childish way to say "to eat", so they probably just wanted Tsukasa to talk like a child. At the same time, "pappa" is also used to talk about dog food ("la pappa del cane") - despite not being used that often, even adults say that sometimes so Tsukasa either talked like a child or called Mitsuba a dog

Now I don't remember word for word for this panel, but he calls Mitsuba a good boy a couple times to calm him down, like how I said that he called Sakura a good girl in the 19th volume

Something more before I go: that's how the Pit God almost speaks, it does in some sort of a mocking or just dragged sound. It probably influenced his way of speaking

TLDR: in the Italian version, Tsukasa has a weird kind of speech that can be mistaken for either a mocking or a childish one, and it creeps Italians out

And down with the curtain! I know this won't get much attention because nobody gaf, but if you're one of the few people who took their time to read it, tyvm!! Feel free to DM me or send me asks telling me how Tsukasa speaks in your native language, it seems fun :D

[warvariations]

italian learning anon here! just wanted to say i have fully committed to my plan and exclusively listened to/watched italian media for 1-2 months now. sorry this is a very tumblry (annoying/unnecessary/parasocial) thing to send as an ask but i wanted to share some of my finds if you don't mind: music-wise i am obsessed with "Ma il cielo è sempre più blu" by Rino Gaetano, i was wondering if you know him? also why did nobody ever tell me that Gianna Nannini is a Lesbian?? Best podcast finds are "Il mondo" by the newspaper Internazionale, 30min every day on international politics, amazingly based and/but also very professional and non-personal. "Tlon - il podcast" has great philosophical & anarchist talks, for example from their "C'è vita oltre il Lavoro" conference. "La mia mamma è femminista" is a cute conversation between a mother and daughter. There are also some deranged christian podcasts that I (shamefully) enjoy listening to, primarily "La Mistica Città di Dio" and a reading of "La Grande Sintesi" by Pietro Ubaldi. There's also an italian mubi podcast, they have an interview with Alice Rohrwacher! Best queer podcast is "Solo se ti rende felice" although it's not entirely my vibe. Also listening to a lot of history podcasts but they're not really worth mentioning, all of them are by overconfident nerdy male high school teachers (appreciate them though). As far as films go i'm obsessed with Pasolini (not exactly a deep cut ik -- but if you haven't yet you need to watch Comizi d'Amore i beg you on my knees. You would love it i swear to god. Uccellacci e uccellini was also great). Caro Diario was kinda entertaining but Nanni Moretti has no business being this tiktok-brained in 1993. Umberto D. (1952) and Nostalgia (1983) were objectively good but not so good that i'd recommend them to anyone. Le otto montagne (2022) was such a cringe male fantasy i almost didn't make it out of the theater alive. I haven't read many books but i was positively surprised by Natalia Ginzburg's short stories and I am making my way through Italo Calvino's Cosmicomiche. Oh and I read 4 issues of the Dylan Dog comics lmaoo. Also reading & listening to italian Kafka translations because I know the originals by heart and therefore understand everything even when i don't understand a word. If you have any book recommendations i'd be thankful to hear them! have a nice day adam x

I love this thank you for sending this. Omg yes Rino Gaetano of course, and have you listened to Lucio Dalla? Nobody told you Gianna Nannini was a lesbian cause she never publicly came out, just like Lucio Dalla, and that also should tell you sth abt Italy. Anyway for some reason I thought you weren't looking for films! All my favorite films are Italian and of course I've seen Comizi D'amore <33 Nanni Moretti that's so funnyy actually I've never watched his films but I know scenes and quotes from them and they do come to mind from time to time haha ("Non è il primo figlio del mondo!" - Iconic scene I really relate to the humor there). I read Natalia Ginzburg's Lessico Famigliare as a kid and I've been meaning to read it again. Screaming che you read Dylan Dog I love the way you went about this. Calvino and Kafka yes, you basically have an Italian hs diploma now. I'm sure my friend Antonio will know about those deranged Christian podcasts haha I love that you listen to those. I know Tlon cause Campagna is part of it but I haven't listened to the podcast bc I can never focus on podcasts but I will try! I'll also check out the other ones I'm curious. Allora libri. Giù la piazza non c'è nessuno di Dolores Prato. And these are the films I picked for my intro to Italian cinema screening series: La Chimera, A Ciambra, Lazzaro Felice, Mamma Roma e Amore e Anarchia - all of Lina Wertmüller's films are quite fun. I'm kinda scrambled at the moment but I'll try to reblog this ask and add other films and books as they come to mind, I just wanted to reply asap cause I loved reading abt your journey!

[onim5]

🎃A Dead Pirate🎃

🎃Halloween specials🎃

Portgas D. Ace x Reader

Warnings: Uh, dead person?

There is no mention of gender.

--------------------------------------

Ace head hung low as he sat chained to the wall. His body was damp and wounded. The worst part was the fact that he felt weak. Defeated could be a good word for it, but it felt horrible on the tongue. Glancing up, his eyes caught glance of the same dead eyes that had been staring at him for days. The body was crumpled, broken, and molding. The poor human seemed to have starved to death.

"Who's that?" Ace asks as a guard pass by. The older man stops and looks at the dead body.

"That's Y/n L/n. They were a pirate that we were supposed to execute 74 years ago." He answers, looking at the stiff molding body.

"Why didn't you execute them?" Ace asks, glaring back at the dead eyes of Y/n.

"I heard they tried, but failed, and failed. It was impossible to kill them, so they locked them up to rot and die. Never to see sunlight again." The guard explains.

"Why still have them here? Their dead. Why not take back the cell?" Ace asks, his voice a little raspy.

"We can't." The guard states, looking at the dead body of Y/n. Ace raised his eyebrow, curious.

"Whoever comes within a 4 meter range to their body dies. That includes if you, for example, shoot her, then the one who fired dies." And as to prove the guards' words, fate sends a small mouse near Y/n, and it died immediately, its body going numb and lifeless within a second. Ace eyes widened in shock. What kind of curse could that be?

"We sometimes use them for quick executions, for pirates that we just need to get rid of, and don't need a public execution like you." The guard then adds. Ace can't stop his blood from boiling in anger. They're using them as a weapon?! How pathetic of them. Ace turned his attention back to Y/n. He felt bad. It's not like they wanted to end like this, right?

"How come I haven't heard of them before?" Ace asks. He felt like some immortal pirate would cause a lot of legends and rumors.

"The government covered all the traces of them. They didn't like the fact that a pirate could stand their power. Only people like me who heard it from the few guards that lived during her time are aware." The guard explains.

"Why tell me then? If it's a secret?" Ace asks, glancing over to the guard.

"You die soon anyway. At Marineford." The guard scoffs. Ace held back his tongue. It was true, after all.

Some days pass, and Ace's concentration never leaves the dead pirate. It's just that it is staring at him. In a way, is it suffocating. Jinbei gets locked up with him. And he hadn't heard of this pirate either, though he admitted that the curse or ability the dead body possesses is one not to mess with.

Magellan and a lot of guards come to Ace. It was time to transport him to Marineford. It's the worst situation he ever been in since his brother and friends were gonna risk their life just to save his.

Before they can leave an echoing sound of something hard falling to the floor, stop them. All slowly turned to look at the dead body of Y/n to find the skeletal arm had fallen out. The same sound echoed but more muffled since this arm had more flesh left on it.

"But, it hasn't moved for years?!" A guard panics scared, since it had been totally still and stiff for the past decades. The head of Y/n slowly looks up at them, her destroyed head, making some guards yelp in fear. The tension was thick, and it felt like they were all stuck.

Magellan watches nervously. How is it even possible?!

Ace didn't know what to believe. A dead body is moving. . . .wait, why is it starring at him?

"Come join me after your death." Their deep voice says to Ace, it had clearly not been used for long, decades. Then, the former pirate started turning into dust, disintegrating away. Leaving an empty cell. . . . . . . .

----------------------

Masterlist

Halloween specials

[gabrielthewarriorblog]

Pinned post.

Hi, hello! That's Gabriel The Warrior from MCSM roleplay blog, welcome!

You obviously can send asks end ect. for him, I'll try to answer as much in character as possible! There's only one rule:

No NSFW asks. You can get freaky with old man, but don't dive too much into it.

I'm open to all possible romantic/platonic relationships! For example: if you're Soren RP blog and want to flirt with Gabriel, go on! He will know it's not his Soren, but he still will get all shy and stuff:) Or, if you're Petra RP blog and want to go for "mentor figure" thing, than he'll give and advise or anything else you need.

Some stuff you should know about this certain route:

This is an actual, living, breathing world with it's rules, people and nature. So don't be surprised if he post stuff like «I'm so tired from council meetings...»

If you have some questions about the worldbuilding, feel free to ask Gabriel or me directly.

He's pretty much aware of "other" universes, and, for example, that green suspenders Jesse here is not his Jesse.

Jesse in this universe chose not to tell the truth and also praise Old Order, so they pretty much still very important figures in the world.

Ellegaard is the one who died during WitherStorm.

It's all post Season 2, he knows about Portal Hallway and Admins. Probably more than he lets on.

Now to the main and most important thing of the blog: withsickness. It will be brought up a lot, since unlike in canon, here from a parasite it turned into actually infection, that kills plants, animals and humans.

1. It's a bodycam, part of the device he uses to post here. If art will be posted, don't be surprised it's from his POV.

2. Device itself, was created by Ellegaard. After her death, Olivia found it, worked on it for a bit and gave it to Gabriel, because basing on Ellegaard's notes, she wanted Gabriel to be the first tester. Tumblr for him looks a lot more different than for us.

3. Withersickness as parasite, first from of withersickness. Closest to in-game version, that was supposed to fade away, but since Gabriel before WS was so much around c. block, in his case it got attached to his immune system, so it slowly drains life away from him.

4. Withersickness as infection, appeared because an animal with witherparasite bit a human. A lot more painful, spreads quickly, causes the skin to crack all the time which leads to bleeding, flesh starts to rot and eventually human turns into a mindless witherzombie. Same for animals and plants. Big problem for the world in current moment.

5. Asks, comments, ect. appear for him as floating boxes. Again, that's info for future (possible) arts

First update

On going conversations and asks will be marked as ⚡, they are not affected by any arcs that are happening in the blog unless they've been started after.

To have a certain characters to ask, you should write their name. If an ask addressed to someone who's not Gabriel, yet there's no name, than Gabriel will answer it. Exception: asks of anons that are constantly talking to one character only.

List of currently available characters:

Gabriel

Jesse

Lukas

Olivia

Ivor

Harper

Jack

Radar

Romeo

Stella

Update 2

Each day you'll receive fun fact about character, event or world itself.

Each three days you'll be getting characters' relationship points with anons.

Update 3

Comment section is not and never will be part of roleplay.

That's all I can think of rn, will add more info if needed! Don't be afraid to interact, he doesn't bite:)

[echo-heo]

Okay here's my SCP post.

I never really got into SCP because to me it looked like if they added Scary Guys to 2ch "believe it or not" lore threads backrooms style. I can't seem to find anything on the English side of the internet about it so I'm assuming y'all have never heard of it but to give an example lemme translate a few of those:

1: Anonymous: 2011/01/30(Sun) 09:55:39 ID:PMjLDGu90

Believe it or not—

A letter from an unknown sender was sent to someone. This instruction was written in the letter: "Add a Lore to this letter and send it to one other person." But he disobeyed the instruction, and spread the Lores widely to an unspecified number of people. After he disappeared, it is said that new Lores were added and were sent to yet another person.

What is 'Lore', exactly?

included in the words 'folklore' or 'internet lore,' Many people may have seen the word 'Lore.' In other words, 'Lore' is a rumor that you've heard, a story that you don't know the basis of that feels like it really happened, A compelling story that sounds like a lie and like the truth, so to speak, an urban legend, etc, It's a story out of a chain letter.

4: Anonymous: 2011/01/30(Sun) 09:59:26 ID:PMjLDGu90

Believe it or not—

A man awoke one morning and cried, "I have no nose!" The next day, "I have no ears!" and the next day, "I have no eyes!" But on the fourth day he cried nothing, because had lost his mouth.

...

8: Anonymous: 2011/01/30(Sun) 10:03:03 ID:PMjLDGu90

Believe it or not—

"Do you need flowers(ハナ)?" When approached from behind, N turned around. A girl with a bouquet of roses and scissors was standing. It's rare to see a flower seller these days. It seemed that she was not Japanese.

"I'm sorry, but I don't need it."

"Do you not need flowers(ハナ)?"

Looking around the girl's mysterious stance, N hurriedly exclaimed, "No, I need it! I need it!"

There it was littered with cut "nose(ハナ)" that belonged to those who must have said "I don't need it."

9: Anonymous: 2011/01/30(Sun) 10:13:38 ID:PMjLDGu90

"She was asking me, 'Do you need a nose?' There were many human noses in the place where she stood! They all got their noses cut off because they replied, 'I don't need them!' So I answered, 'I need it!' That's all!" Since that day, Mr. N had two noses on his face.

Believe it or not—

...

14: Anonymous: 2011/01/30(Sun) 11:33:00 ID:PMjLDGu90

Believe it or not—

In 1970, the strange series of incidents began at a hotel in a remote countryside in Wales. First, the left leg, then the right arm, and pieces of the mutilated body were found throughout Britain. The examination found that all the bodies were of the same person. Police decided to ignore the incidents when three left arms and two heads of the same person were found.

17: Anonymous: 2011/01/30(Sun) 12:05:34 ID:9d9X1EexO

Ooh, finally a new thread! I really loved that thread, so I'm happy. >>1 Thank you But the Lore about selling flower was q

18: Anonymous: 2011/01/30(Sun) 12:08:20 ID:9d9X1EexO

Sry, typo But the Lore about selling flower was quite long. That's what I wanted to type.

21: Anonymous: 2011/01/30(Sun) 13:35:05 ID:PMjLDGu90

Believe it or not—

In 1968, an express train connecting Florida and Georgia suddenly stopped at a tunnel. When the driver of the subsequent train, who had received the report, went to see what was going on, he found that everyone on the train had already died. And strangely enough, according to the investigation committee, all of their deaths were due to old age.

23: Anonymous: 2011/01/30(Sun) 13:36:45 ID:PMjLDGu90

>>18 I wrote the nose Lore as a two-parter.

25: Anonymous: 2011/01/30(Sun) 21:13:34 ID:PMjLDGu90

Believe it or not—

Stock trader, S, who, after retiring due to mental fatigue, became nauseated just by passing through the train station near to the office building. His psychiatrist friend told him: "When you're passing by the station, repeat to yourself, that station doesn't exist." After that, S, with a pale expression, began to say, "I repeated to myself, there is no such station, and the station actually disappeared." The psychiatrist, upon asking the station, winced as well, because the station of that name actually did not exist on that line.

26: Anonymous: 2011/01/30(Sun) 21:14:27 ID:PMjLDGu90

Believe it or not—

A novelist found a weird note on the bookshelf in his study. On it, in his handwriting— 'Currently, a year is 452 days. A week 12 days. The distance between the moon and the earth, 130 thousand km…' —were completely inaccurate measurements, and at the end, hurriedly scribbled: 'The world keeps getting renewed.' He did not have a memory of writing such a thing. Was he, 'renewed,' just like that.

---

I think it would be a whole lot different if these were SCPs. Scary creatures and items catalogued as real instead of mixed in with lies, sharing a single world. IIRC There's a bit about the OP disappearing after going nuts House of Leaves style I wish these were translated into English cause they kinda defined my taste in horror. Compared to these SCP feels way shallower to me. Scary guys. yk.

[thegoldheartlocketandkey-blog]

911 Spoilers Season 5: You’ve been warned. 😅 Buddie Rewatch

Episode 4: Home and Away

Chimney is rewatching Maddie’s video, replaying it obsessively. Buck knocks on the door, calling out to Chim, telling him he can hear him and to open the door. After a few moments, Buck unlocks the door and allows himself in. Buck stands at the entrance with concern on his face as he looks toward Chim.

Buck slowly walks towards Chim, repeating his name and trying to get his attention. Chimney finally responds, there is frustration in his tone. Buck proceeds to tell him that he needs to stop, that Maddie left, it’s not a big deal, it’s something she does.

Buck is very matter of fact about the situation. Maddie just needs distance. Maddie always leaves. He’s dismissive of Chimney’s concerns. So, he’s not really dismissive, because he acknowledges that his concerns are valid, but he is treating the situation differently than Chim.

As Chim is showing Buck the video Maddie made and bringing up possible explanations to justify her leaving, and needing help; Buck is not taking Chim’s concerns as valid. Buck is bringing up excuses for Maddie and telling Chim that the situation will correct itself.

This moment really showcases Buck’s relationship with Maddie. Buck is obviously use to seeing this side of her. He’s not phased by her leaving, he kind of just expects it at this point.  What Buck fails to realize is this situation is not identical to the other moments of his past with her. Buck isn’t trying to be an asshole in this scene, but he comes a cross that way. To be fair it’s difficult to feel apart of this situation.  This moment really solidifies that Buck is use to being left.

High School Parade – The 118 arrive at scene. Ravi and Buck run up to the turned over Truck. Working together to break the windshield and check on the driver. They mark the driver as dead.  Buck questions if the accident was intentional and with further discussion with Bobby it is determined that the deceased did not do this on purpose.

Hen and Eddie run up to a cheerleader on the ground. Eddie is the one to pronounce her dead. They spot another cheerleader injured and run up to her. The cheerlead is barley conscious, but is able to speak. She repeatedly says the name Makaila, after being asked her name,

Ravi and Buck run up to the teacher pinned to the benches, they call over Bobby to look over the situation. They create a plan to extract the victim.

Eddie closes the Ambulance door and sends it away when two parents run over to him asking about their daughter. Believing the injured party was named Makaila he tells them that she is on the way to the hospital. The parents also ask him about her friend Casey, and he explains that there was another cheerleader who died on scene.

Ravi and Buck stabilize the structure the teacher is pinned down on. Ravi points out the truck is on fire; this is when it is discovered that chlorine gas was in the truck.  

The 118 suit up and wear gas masks.  Buck is working to cut the victim out of the benches with a saw. They are able to get the teacher out and place him in an ambulance.

This particular rescue is a perfect example of Buck and Eddie being separated as partners. Not that I don’t love Hen and Eddie working closely together or Ravi and Buck working together. It’s just something I noticed in my rewatch that Eddie and Buck are being separated more and more.  I love that we see them develop their other relationships in the 118, but I can’t ignore that they likely separated the two because they wanted us Buddie shippers to calm down a bit.

Hospital- Eddie comments, “Not my favorite day.” Hen and Eddie have a moment acknowledging how difficult the rescue was. This is when the parents that approached them at the scene, approaches them again at the hospital.

The parents thank Hen and Eddie for rescuing their daughter. Eddie asks the parents if they know the other victim, which they respond with yes, she was their daughter’s best friend.  Hen and Eddie both are visibly upset and empathetic to the situation.

Casey’s parents approach the group. Hen and Eddie watch as the families comfort each other. The parents of the deceased notices blood on Eddies neck, causing them to break down in tears, and Eddie is awkwardly holding his neck. Eddie offers to take the parents to see their deceased daughter to identify the body.

 Eddie stands behind the parents, head down allowing them time to process.

Eddie’s head shoots up with concern when the parents reveal that it is not their daughter on the table. Concern and worry is written all over Eddie’s face.

Eddie approaches Hen and explains to Hen the current situation and how they may have misidentified the girls.  

Eddie and Hen are sitting on the bench, they look anxious. Eddie leaned over, hand claps together when a doctor walks over and confirms that they mis identified the victims. Hen offers to break the news. Eddie asks her if she’s sure and she confirms she has to be the one to break the news.

In the hall way as Hen breaks the news to the parents. As the parents process the news, they collapse on to the floor. Eddie approaches with the other parents as this happens and the parents comfort each other.  

While the families embrace, Eddie and Hen stand near each other, watching the moment. Both having a look of sadness on their faces.

Buck’s loft - Buck opens the door to Chimney who reveals he just learned what happened with Maddie and Jee-Yun.

Something to note here is that Chim knocks on the door and Buck lets him in. We know Buck has a key to Chim’s place because he let himself in earlier in the episode. But does Buck have a key to Chim’s apartment because of his sister or because the 118 decided that they all will have each other’s keys. We know Eddie has a key to Buck’s apartment and vise versa, but do Hen and Bobby also have a key. I may make a separate post on the topic because this small detail can really impact the trust/intimacy in Buck and Eddies relationship and build an even stronger foundation for Buddie.

Chim is excited and urgent when he tells Buck his new found knowledge. Buck is stern and combative to Chim’s hopes and desire to chase after Maddie.

Buck’s reaction makes Chim realize that Buck knew why Maddie left the whole time. Chim’s initial excitement turns to anger.

Chim is visibly more upset and angrier and as Buck is tries to justify his actions,  Chim throws a punch, hitting Buck in the eye and storms out.

Buck is left in his loft, hands on the dinning room table, dumbfounded and processing what just happened.

Buck’s balcony-  Buck is sitting outside, Eddie walks in from the kitchen with two beers in hand. Eddie makes a joke, “nothing wrong with his aim” as he hands Buck one of the beers.

Eddie leans against the balcony wall and Buck admits to understanding why Chim hit him, but also feeling justified in what he did.

Buck explains that he really thought he could help Chim and Maddie at the same time. Believing if he let Maddie do what she always does and comforting Chim in the process that everything will eventually fix itself. Buck states, “Kind of feels like I failed on both fronts.”

Eddie takes a sip of his beer and point blank tells Buck that he was always destined to fail.

Buck points out that the statement is kind of harsh and Eddie elaborates on his point.

Eddie points out that Buck loves Maddie and loves Chimney and that Buck is the guy that loves to fix things, but that this isn’t something that he can fix.

Buck is combative towards Eddie, stating that Chimney wasn’t being rational and that he knows his sister and that Chim just doesn’t know her the way he does.

Eddie is quick to tell Buck, “Or maybe you don’t know her the way he does.” Basically, starts explaining to Buck that he knows one version of Maddie, the Maddie that is his older sister. Chimney knows a different Maddie, one that he is the one to know what she needs.

There is a slight pause, Buck is taking in what Eddie just said and then asks him if he thinks Chimney will ever forgive him. Jokingly Eddie says no, pauses and then says maybe. Both Buck and Eddie take a swig of their beers and Eddie reminds Buck to put the ice back on his eye.

Chim is packing up his car- Buck is calling Chim, Chim ignores the call.

[tornoleander]

Wow, you're the beta reader for bbnb? I didn't know that. (So you can confirm that Hat is infact not dead because I haven't seen any activity from them in a while and my brain always jumps to worst case scenarios)

Anyway, definitely didn't forget to respond for like a week, but here are some of my theories/scenarios:

-I still think Cole's the one who'll remember bits and pieces because A. He's a ghost B. Hat used he/him when talking about who will remember and C. It would be incredibly emotionaly impactful

-HOWEVER, I think Pixal could also remember some stuff. None of the emotional stuff but she did technically die when Nadakhan erased her. Besides, it could be fun to see her try to let Jay or Nya know she remembers while still stuck to Zane.

-also Zane's falcon died but he was never mentioned in this fic so 😔

-Jay DEFINITELY has c-ptsd. Like, 100%, I'm sure the nurse/psychologist whose name I forgor would agree with me

-I'm pretty sure Wu just died by some falling island or something like that. Or he could've died by the storm, that would be cool.

-I know he said that swearing is a sign of weak verbal skills but I feel like Jay would start swearing more for comfort. Like, Nadakhan hated it but never truly did anything horrible to him because of it :)

most of the scenarios in my head play out with the ninja being captured again

-for example, Jay using his internal electricity to shock someone when they all have vengestone

-or them getting tazed and Jay sending the current back like he did in the electric chair

-or they're all traped and saying shit like "there's no other option" or something and Jay replying with "suicide's still an option" like that's a normal thing to say which obviously worries the others

And then there's the non captured scenarios

-something something Jay falling into autopilot after being told/asked to clean to ship and ends up also cleaning the hull "Why are you cleaning the bottom? We're in the air and you're not even tied to anything???" ".... trauma response?"

-or just straight up Jay having a panic attack out of seemingly sowhere (Cole said he wished he could eat cake again)

Anyway, those are the things I could think of right now, there's more but it's 3:39am and I'm tired :3

Hope it's not too long lol

Yep! As of ch 15. Me and hat have been chatting for a while and I bug them for feedback on Art accuracy so I help them with some writing corrections too!

I have been working on beta reading earlier chapters as well currently half way through 4. It is certainly an experience but now I yell my feelings into comment instead of just the void

*reaches through horrific horror to correct spelling mistake.

Yup Hat is alive! They were just fixated on something else for a while but they are back.

Ok now for scenarios

-Cole remembering bits……. I will refrain from giving my thoughts.

-Pixal and Zane’s falcon died pretty early so I do think they may remember up till then but It probably wouldn’t help understand much.

-I don’t think Wu died? But it’s not impossible.

-CPTSD?

I will ask hat about this one but seeing as bbnb events qualify as at least 4/6 of these causes of it AND ptsd is a tag I’m going to give it a yeah. Cause non complex ptsd is typically less prolonged.

-the swearing I do think he might do more but not necessarily for comfort

-For your head scenarios I am not sure all the ways hat is planned show how the events of the fic messed him up. But I know they’re a big fan of consequences for events…

From what I’m guessing he is going to be trying his best to hide everything and it’ll be somewhat canon compliant? But to be fair He is pretty consistently the most mentally unstable ninja. Take This with a big grain of salt I’m saving the analysis for my skybound video, but his behavior does generally line up well with SA surivers. the first time that Jays a prisoner post Skybound is when he says “You don’t argue with a man who’s navel is that close”

Which

Drives me insane by the way

Side tangent, I’ve been doing a lot of Skybound digging for my eventual video essay. And my current best theory on why this is a line has to do with SA of men being played for laughs.

Like older audiences are supposed to hear that and find it fucking funny. It’s unfortunately not uncommon in kids programming. My quest to best explain why S6 is so uncomfortable has been… enlightening. Terrified of approaching a controversial topic so I have been learning a-lot about approach and how to not be awful. But my fixation is being channeled led into the eventual Skybound video.

Hope I answered what you wanted to know and It wasn’t purely my Adhd rambling

[kickthecanrevolution]

Round 4 infusion day:

I started the day very anxious, a colleague of mine reached out and let me know that she was also in treatment and it turned out that it’s my same exact cancer.

Some of the things that she said triggered a lot of questions for me, it was hard to go to sleep. My initial heart rate in the first lab was really elevated and they were slightly concerned, and then it got even more elevated as I sat in the chair. I was asking the staff and my doctor a ton of questions but I wasn’t listening to the answers, I was just talking over them.

R gently observed that I was in a lot of anxiety and it was likely because I had inadvertently violated my boundary of not wanting to know much about my type of cancer and that I would only ask questions and get information from my doctor. My colleague was obviously very well intended but it turned out to trigger a lot of anxiety that showed up physically for me today. It was just such an insightful observation and I know it’s going to lead to some important shadow work.

My physical experience during the infusion was also different today, I had some pain, the cold capping was hard, I was very dizzy and absolutely exhausted. I basically slept for four or five hours straight, I would wake up for Cold Capping but would almost fell asleep in the middle of it.

When I finally woke up, R showed me some pictures that she had taken and we absolutely died laughing, the kind of belly laughing that sears into your memory. So much so that the nurses came in to see what was so funny and they said how amazing it was to hear so much fun and joy in a place that’s so hard.

We ended up sending the picture to the head of Retail Into a few others and just left even harder. Our dark humor got dark, just the way I like it. The “You Shall Not Pass….literally” was the cherry on top of the sundae.

We finally got home, ordered some food for dinner and then she helped me arrange my furniture - when you walk into her house, it’s immediately beautiful, comfortable and pragmatic all at the same time, and she also has three cats so she knows what it means to be a cat lady. I wanted to use some of that expertise and so asked her if she had any ideas and we ended up changing so much – it made me emotional, I love it so much. We also bought a couple of really beautiful plants the day before to bring some color and life, some good additions to all of the white in here. I can’t wait for them to get here tomorrow.

All the sudden I had to go to bed, I got pretty tired again. I hugged her for a really long time and told her a grateful I am that someone who loves others so well – better than anyone I know - is in my life. It’s an example to me of love and grace I don’t deserve but I am so thankful that I have it. How she makes me a better human being.

It was a lot for her to go through today, people who love us who have to see us vulnerable, in pain can suffer - there was a lot she didn’t expect. But she did it and she still made me laugh. What a friend. 

[enden-k]

i’m absolutely hooked on your grimms games story.. feel like an orphaned kid (youri) begging for more scraps! please sir... can i have some more 🙏🙏. i have a good load of questions though tehe... feel free to ignore any, i know its a lot

1. you mentioned that the games are all played for the entertainment of others, but i wondered what you meant by that? does this mean there’s a higher organisation that watch these games for fun... or are the games broadcasted to the people of the city for their entertainment?

2. how long do these games typically last? i assumed they happen every year.. but do the teams have a set time frame to complete the game by, or are there no time restrictions + the game simply ends when there’s only one team standing?

3. do the games only consist of fighting, or are there external forces involved in tricking and endangering the players? for example.. collapsing buildings, natural disasters, acid rain? (which makes me wonder whether the games are held in a controlled arena, distant + abandoned grounds, or within the city and among the ppl)

4. shorter question! but how do people enter the games? the fighting siblings and the surrounding team members?

5. does kaia like women.. would she perhaps be interested in kissing girls.. just asking... for a friend.. 🫣🏳‍🌈..

ALSO I’M REALLY SORRY, I KNOW THERE’S A LOT OF QUESTIONS... i’m not expecting an answer for all of them dw, only answer whatever u feel like answering 🫶 but omg i am SO hooked on this story, on ur characters.. (particularly izayah, kaia and tay) sending u all the love!!!

!!!!!!!!! thanks for the interest and asking!!!!

2) the game starts once both siblings set foot into the city and ends when the first sibling dies. the losing sibling will be eaten by the entity, finishing the ritual and once it hungers again, the games will be repeated and hosted by the winning sibling. until then, they rule (usually nothing less than 10 years), having all their wishes fulfilled

1) for this, i have to babble a bit abt the story/inspiration behind it. when i first drew this story, i was 14 and inspired by a fairytale my adoptive father used to read to us every evening when we were younger. idk if the story of hansel and gretel is known to all of you (i think it should?) but its literally the story my comic used to be heavily based on until i made changes over the years n stuff.

in my comic, i mentioned a ritual and sacrifice etc. its all for a strange, demonic entity who lured the first siblings into the woods centuries ago and the games were eventually made for. the sacrifices, the deaths are all for its entertainment, the souls to feed it. in return, it nurtures, powers and protects the cursed city

3) the entire cursed city is their battlefield and there are few safe zones where theres no fighting allowed and where they can encounter each other on a neutral basis (hospital, central part/main business district, ...). other than that, its pretty much purge-style. no rules, everything is allowed

4) the siblings are chosen by the entity itself early on, destined (cursed) to find their way into the woods and the city, lured by the entity. this goes only for the siblings, the main players.

for fairness, each team has fixed, same roles where the possible players are lit raised for it (like youri. he was taken in and raised to be the "guardian" among many other orphans). all members get picked by the siblings themselves, theyre responsible for their teams quality and quantity

5) kaia doesnt like much, shes entirely driven by hatred................but to answer that, yes she does jkjsbdjk

some answers are quite short, i came home from work and am a lil dead tbh but yea maybe ill pick these up some time again and elaborate more or so!!

[hxhhasmysoul]

Can I ask from this ask game : https://www.tumblr.com/toomanyfandomsthings/749729499738996736/send-me-a-ship-and-a-number-and-ill-tell-you?source=share

No. 2, 10, 11, 12, 15 for KilluGon and SukuIta.... Thanks ......🌻

I did it all of those, they looked fun I hope you don't mind.

KilluGon

1. Which one is the better cook?

Canonically neither is a good cook XD But I think Gon can cook some basic stuff even if it’s not amazing and Killua is a spoiled rich boi who just can’t cook at all. In AU I still think Killua just wouldn’t know how to cook most of the time unless he ran away with his sisters and had to step up, maybe he could know how to bake if he stayed with his family. Gon would know at least the basics of cooking, because Mito wouldn’t let him move out if he didn’t. 

2. What do their love letters look like?

Gon is super suave, he has his way with words. He’d quote poetry or movies. He would attach dry flowers to the letters. 

Killua would be awkward, he wouldn’t know what to write, there’d be few words in the letter, He’d use colourful ink though, and cute stickers, especially rare ones, like ones you win in some way.

3. Which one outlives the other, and how do they cope?

I think Gon could live longer because he has a better diet. But if he was old he’d wither slowly once Killua died, it just wouldn’t be the same.

4.What do they do on date night?

That’s Gon’s ballpark, he’d make plans. Each date would be different. Some would be small and intimate, some grand and with many events along the way. Killua would try to plan something sometimes, probably something geeky, Gon would indulge him.

5. How many kids will they have?

In canon? Likely none, they would jump from one adventure to another, there wouldn’t be time for kids. In AU that’d depend on the story. Like in my political clans AU, I imagine them having a kid eventually, though it would be a difficult choice because Gon travels for work in that one. It’d take negotiating and him taking a more stationary job at least when the kid was small. Also In my magical creatures AU they would have kids eventually, they would both be really into it and commit to it. But for example in the Regency AU, or the cyberpunk one I don’t think they would.

6. How do they decorate their bedroom?

Like the rest of their house. Gon has his geeky shit connected to plants and animals, Killua has his geeky shit connected to games. It’s chaos. I’m sure Killua has a Gold Dust Girl bodypillow, they both sleep on it. On their blanket there is a huge frog.

7 Which one is the worse driver?

Killua, the road rage is high with that one.

8. What do they argue about?

The canon stuff, like their self-destructive tendencies, overreliance on each other, etc. They aren’t great communicators and situations that could’ve been talked out escalate to arguments.

9. Which one swears more?

Gon, that’s just canon. Killua doesn’t really seriously swear.

10. What TV shows do they watch together, and which ones do they hide from the other?

They watch all the stuff together, they can be cringe with each other.

11. What was their first impression of each other?

“He’s so cool”, for both of them.

12. What do they do for their anniversary?

Something wild, likely they go on an adventure together.

13. Which one makes a bigger deal of birthdays?

They both make a big deal of birthdays.

14. What nicknames do they call each other?

I’m not really sure, they don’t seem that big on nicknames. When I come up with nicknames for them in AUs it’s tied to the AU and not canon.

15. What would they change about each other?

Their communication skills, their self-destructiveness. Like both of them really are against the other sacrificing himself and yet they just don’t listen.

_____________

SukuIta

1. Which one is the better cook?

Yuuji, unless it’s an AU where Sukuna is a pro chef, then he’s either better or they are equals. 

2. What do their love letters look like?

Sukuna’s look like proper Heian love letters, written on the paper matching the season, containing a well crafted tanka. 

Even if Yuuji writes a tanka back, it’s a bit humorous but likely still has the seasonal word. It’s on Hello Kitty paper because Yuuji knows Sukuna is secretly a Kitty fan.

3. Which one outlives the other, and how do they cope?

Yuuji lives longer because he’s younger. He compartmentalises it, like every loss in his life it just adds to his general sense of misery. 

4. What do they do on date night?

Something kinky. 

5. How many kids will they have?

I feel like none, Sukuna’s the baby kind of… XD

Though in an AU setting they could have kids, it depends.

6. How do they decorate their bedroom?

I feel Sukuna generally has an expensive and snobby taste so he really pushes for a fancy house/apartment. I feel he likes it traditional, or in Modern AU, modern meets traditional. But I think in the bedroom Yuuji managed to get some cute elements, possibly a big Kitty plush, maybe even a Kitty duvet or bed sheets.

7 Which one is the worse driver?

Sukuna, the road rage is high with that one.

8. What do they argue about?

Ideals, their world views are not the same. Where and how they live, Yuuji doesn’t really desire opulence. Sukuna’s better than thou attitude. Yuuji devoting too much time to others. They have a lot to work through. 

9. Which one swears more?

I feel Yuuji more casually but also less harshly. When Sukuna swears it’s like a punch.

10. What TV shows do they watch together, and which ones do they hide from the other?

They watch Yuuji’s horror movies and anime together, and discuss it together. Sukuna doesn’t always manage to win the “this is trash” argument, Yuuji’s good at noticing cool and poignant stuff in pop culture. They don’t watch Jeniffer Lawrence films together, Sukuna gets jealous. Also Sukuna hides that he sometimes watches sappy romance, to criticise it of course but also when Yuuji is aways and Sukuna is lonely.

11. What was their first impression of each other?

Sukuna’s impression of Yuuji: “What a naive fool. Would be an easy to fuck if he didn’t look like he’s needy.” Or to translate it into normal language from repression and denial: “Fuck he’s cute, he fasicnates me, I want him so badly but I’m terrified of commitment.”

Yuuji’s impression of Sukuna: “What a stuck up jerk! Nice ass though, why the fuck do I want him? What is wrong with me?”

12. What do they do for their anniversary?

Something really kinky that takes most of the day/night. There’s also a fancy dinner/breakfast after the kinky stuff. 

13. Which one makes a bigger deal of birthdays?

Yuuji because he wants big parties. 

14. What nicknames do they call each other?

Sukuna’s for Yuuji is obviously “brat”, sometimes something like “sweet/cute brat”.

Yuuji’s for Sukuna, in the beginning it’s likely “pompous/snobby jerk”, later just “Kuna”. 

15. What would they change about each other?

Their respective world view. Sukuna wants to bring Yuuji down to his level. Yuuji just wants Sukuna not to be a menace to society.

[bloxtales-dawn-of-timeau]

{"Hey Sheddy... There's people with us..."}

"I know. I don't want to acknowledge them yet."

-🗡---⏳️---🌐---🔨---🍗-

[EDIT: I'm gonna edit this shit a lot. Please expect changes]

📝INFO - Heya this is an Ask blog/Story blog for My Blocktales AU, Blox Tales: Dawn of Time. Also, I made this Blog intending to have a Shedletsky Ask Blog with my twist, but I decided to include him alongside my Main OC, Coiler also known as Player or Daniel! It'll be mostly text with some Gacha Life 2 images (ADHD is a nightmare). But If I had enough motivation, there would be drawings! (I'm not a great artist. Believe me) Also, this is my first ask blog!

🚫DNI REQUIREMENTS - No pedophiles, or other gross stuff. The Poster is uncomfortable with those stuff, so stay veryyyy far away.

💖SHIPS - The Main Ship is between Shedletsky and Coiler, but any ships are indeed allowed and They can be shipped with anyone you want. (Pls note: Shedletsky and Brighteyes are just friends in my AU and are not married)

📔AU - While this is not yet a complete Au, it's still an AU. Which means a lot of things will be different. If you don't like that, you can create your own Ask blog. Nothing is stopping you. But please note, this is fanfiction and any person that is mentioned or appears here is only the character and not the real person.

Anyway, This is my AU:

This is a Block Tales x The Robloxian: Until Dawn au but there are major changes. (Like Myths, YouTubers, and popular Players exist, and other games appear are mentioned) The Crossover is only gonna be between the characters, and Coiler's flashback.

The Guardians are a special rank in the administration group, and have a weaker version of the admin command. They are the wielders of the SFOTH swords and have been assigned by the swords themselves to protect it. Though sometimes, the sword goes rouge and kills its wielder to be wielded by a new one (For example, The Ice Dagger killed its user and handed itself to Cruel King)

Roblox (The character) is the one that send Coiler and Guest 333 back in time to save Builderman and Erik.cassel before its too late.

Instead of being alone, Coiler is joined by his past self, Dylan (Before he became a Guardian), Noobin (Saw noob past self), and Gust (Guest's past self).

They are also joined by Guest 333 also known as "Viewer" or "Viny", He's a white hat hacker (like Inc0mu) fighting against the evil myths/hackers/admins/players, He died but he managed to give Roblox a piece of his code that serves as his current vessel. He's a replacement for the Heal pads and will not be fighting as he's still recovering.

No one except Shedletsky, Mayor Thaniyel, and The bosses know that Coiler has a team as they often split up and then regroup when near the boss area, and everyone thinks that he defeated the bosses alone

In Demo 3, instead of fighting 4 emotions, he'll be fighting 5 emotions. GREED and SOLITUDE are replaced by DOUBT and ENVY. The new emotion, GUILT, will replace HATRED as the final boss, They each represent each party member's strongest negative emotion. (DOUBT = Gust, ENVY = Dylan, FEAR = Viny, HATRED = Noobin, and lastly GUILT = Coiler)

Griefer survives stabbing his food, but his right leg is now gone. He still hears voices but it's faint, He's sometimes dragged by Gust to join them, much to Noobin's annoyance.

Coiler, and sometimes the entire group visit the other places when they get bored, and often had to fight rouge player

It's been 6 months since Coiler and Viny start their journey to prevent the future. Because why would it take just a few days to get the swords? They have to atleast have breaks and challenges.

[IF YOU WANT MORE LORE OR INFORMATION, JUST ASK ME. I'll RESPOND IF I HAVE THE TIME]

👤CHARACTERS - The Main characters will be Coiler, and Shedletsky. And the side characters will be Viny, Dylan, Noobin and Gust. But other characters can appear and take over too!

📝TEXT GUIDE -

Texts associated with Coiler is Pink

Texts associated with Shedletsky is orange

Characters like Viny, Noobin, Gust and Dylan will have their own colored texts, while other characters has their unique texts

Coiler and other Admins talks with a curly brakets, Viny, Benjamin, and Zabriel (Kitchen Wizard) talk with a Parentheses (because they're considered dead), Gust talk with square braket cus he's mute, and other have quotation marks.

🔖TAGS -

#"{What's Up?}" - Coiler & Shedletsky ask

#"{Living the life}" - Coiler & Shedletsky post

#<Um... hi?> - The poster interaction

#{"Can answer that."} - Coiler ask

#{"I keep seeing memories...} - Coiler post

#"This is a good distraction from my life." - Shedletsky ask

#"I'm worried about my mental health" - Shedletsky post

#(You feel like being watched) - Viny mentioned

#(A wild code appear!) - Viny featured

#*Causing Chaos* - Dylan/Noobin/Gust mentioned

#"The kids are here!" - Dylan/Noobin/ Gust featured

#"I wonder where are they..." - other characters mentioned

#"There you are." - Other characters featured

#<OOC TIME!!!> - OOC/Normal posts

#<If only it didn't happen...> - Backstory Posts

#<Back to Game!> - Story posts

[Note: Some tags are the posters reaction]

[v2berconfessions]

IMPORTANT INFORMATION REGARDING THIS BLOG BENEATH THE CUT. PLEASE READ BEFORE FOLLOWING, OR SUBMITTING ANYTHING!!!

This account is 16+!!! I will be swearing and occasionally discussing NSFW topics on here, and my likes will contain tumblr-friendly lewds. I do not feel comfortable with anyone under the age of 16 following or interacting with me.

Rules (for submitting confessions):

1. The asks MUST be related to vtubers one way or another.

2. Do not use any lgbt-phobic or ethnic slurs.

3. Horny-posting is allowed, but please put a trigger warning.

4. Similarly, please post a trigger warning if the ask is regarding anything serious, such as allegations of sexual assault, stalking, sexual harrassment, etc.

5. Violent threats or fantasies regarding vtubers are not allowed, no matter the reason.

Examples of what is not allowed:

"We need to kill *insert vtuber* with hammers."

"I hope *insert vtuber* gets murdered by one of their fans."

"Somebody needs to hit *insert vtuber* with a car."

"*insert vtuber* should've died in that accident."

6. I reserve the right to ban any topics that I grow tired of hearing about. Currently, no topics are off-limits, but please do not continuously send asks about one subject matter.

Rules (for shilling vtubers AKA candidates for Vtuber of the day):

3. You are allowed to submit shills of their merchandise, streams, and events as well, but please keep it to a minimum.

1. Candidates MUST be at minimum 18 years or over. No freshly turned 18 vtubers, at least 6 months must've passed since their (public) birthday.

2. You MUST submit a link to their channel on their main streaming platform.

4. Candidates who were creating content long before getting a vtuber model do not count. (Ex. JaidenAnimations, Kwite, etc.)

5. Candidates for VtuberOTD itself must not be extremely popular in the scene (Ex. Shylily, Shxtou, Ironmouse, etc.)

6. I reserve the right to blacklist any vtuber who makes me uncomfortable. Currently, I'm attempting to remember the previous blacklist.

7. If any posted candidates have had serious allegations brought against them, please notify me immediately. The post will be hidden until the allegations are either confirmed or debunked. If confirmed, the post will be deleted, and the candidate's current and future identities will be blacklisted from the blog forever.

Info about Mod:

-I am a legal adult, but I do not feel comfortable stating my age.

-You can refer to me as "Alice".

-I have lots of opinions on certain controversial topics that I will try to refrain from speaking about on this blog.

-I am American, so I may not be all too familiar with cultural differences when it comes to vtubers from other countries.

-I'm not white, I only say this because I know there are very annoying people on tumblr who want to know your race before you talk about anything.

-Please refer to me with she/her pronouns.

My Oshis (⭐️is for kamioshis of the branch/company):

True Kamioshi: Gawr Gura (Hololive EN) ⭐️⭐️⭐️

Hololive-

EN

Gawr Gura, Takanashi Kiara ⭐️, Hakos Baelz, FuwaMoco Abyssgard, Shiori Novella, & Cecilia Immergreen

JP

Inugami Korone ⭐️, Nekomata Okayu, Sakura Miko, Usada Pekora, Houston Marine, Takane Lui, Ichijou Ririka

ID

Airani Iofiteen, Kureiji Ollie, Anya Melfissa, Kaela Kovalskia ⭐️, & Kobo Kanaeru

Holostars

JP

Minase Rio ⭐️

EN

Gavis Bettel

Brave Group (EN speaking companies)-

V4Mirai

Serina Maiko, Kou Mariya ⭐️, Dr. Nova(e), & Rara Rocora

Globie

Bonnie Barkswell & Rhubarb N. Kustard ⭐️

Idol

Roca Rourin & Nikki Rei ⭐️

[yoonkinii]

We Were Human

Pairing(s): Ascended!AstarionxReader

Part 4:

Synopsis: Astarion died as soon as he became something the world has never seen before. No one noticed the damage before it was too late and the Astarion everyone loved was lost to the new one. No one could notice when the turn was slow and silent. He slowly lost the playful glint in his eyes. Lost the love he gaze upon me with. Lost everything that made him the man I loved. Oh, how I would give anything to get him back. I would gladly give up my damned soul for him.

Aka you are transported back to the past in order to prevent ascended Astarion from losing himself the only problem? You don’t have a lot of time.

-

Warnings: Gore, blood, cruelty, cursing, death/murder, mentions of using oneself unwillingly, abuse. Its ascended Astarion, prepare for the worst.

Masterlist

Note(s): For the sake of the plot- Astarion will not automatically be damned from the start. In this world, Astarion becomes lost to the ascension overtime until he becomes the ascended vampire we know him to be in the game. Another note that should be highlighted is that this story will be told from the first person perspective since it benefits the story more than any other perspective.

You will also notice various things being different from the game. For example, Karlach will be able to stay in the ‘human’ world and she fixed her heart. (I love my girl, I’m not sending her back), Szaars palace has a different layout cause the one in the game was stupid. There will be more that you will notice in the future so beware.

Thank You.

Sorry this part is so short compared to the previous ones. I had to cut it off at that point or else this part would've been crazy long.

-

It wasn’t long until Astarions breathing returned to normal but even then he was unresponsive. The two of us laid there in complete silence, the echoes of life sounding outside of the tent. My hand wadded through his silver locks, gently tugging out knots that appeared in his nightmarish sleep. He clung to me like a lifeline, his fingers clenching the fabric of my shirt, his nose pressed into the pulse point of my neck. We were lifeless in that moment, neither of us moving or talking, simply laying like entwined corpses. Perhaps we already were corpses when we both changed, my heart stopped as soon as I turned into a spawn and his has been gone for centuries. I didn’t know how long had passed since Astarion had woken up as him but it seemed like enough time to finally break the silence.

“How long has this been happening, Astari?”

The nickname fell from my lips without a second thought. I had rarely ever called him that, not since he ascended for the first time in my other life. If I closed my eyes and thought hard enough, I could still remember the way Astarions body paused above mine, his assault on my lips ceasing. At first, I had thought I made a mistake and it wasn’t until he asked me to repeat it to him over and over. Each time the name fell from my lips, a kiss was pressed against them. 

He was silent for a while and I had begun to think he wasn’t going to answer until his shoulders rose as he inhaled. A very human thing he did when there was no need. I could not judge though, I still did it even though I was already dead. My body couldn’t get rid of that habit and it seems neither could he.

“Ever since I ascended.”

The hand that was running through his hair halted, a pain of worry bolting through me. “What?” I asked breathlessly. The hand that wasn’t running through his hair, cupped the side of his; guiding him to look at me. My lips pinched into a fine line as I gazed at the man I loved with my entire being. His ruby eyes were shrouded in grief and a pain I’ve never known before. His eyes which were once filled with light were now weighed heavy with hidden grief. His carefully articulated mask of contemptment had fallen and I was finally seeing the true extent of his torment. His shoulders were hunched, as though he was trying to close in on himself. 

“Why haven’t you told me this?”

Inhaling sharply, my mouth opened to ask another question at his silence but was halted as Astarion suddenly pulled away from my embrace and began pulling on his boots. Lines of confusion appeared between my brows, “Where are you going? We need to talk about this.” 

“We do not need to talk about anything.” Astarion responded through a clenched jaw. He stood and on instinct, I grabbed onto the hem of his tunic, 

“Wait-”

“Let go of me.” He said sharply, “I do not need or want to talk about it. You have been told everything you need to know.”

He didn’t wait for my reply before he exited the tent, leaving me alone. My lips quivered, the familiar burning sensation of frustrated tears brimming my eyes. 

“Gods dammit.” My voice sounded into the air. I was all too familiar with this scene, he did it when he was a spawn. He closed himself off, a defense mechanism he could never part with. It wasn’t him pulling away from me that made the cold grip of anxiety take hold, it was his voice. At that moment, it was not Astarions but his voice commanding me once more. Demanding that I obey, that I bend at his will no matter what. 

I inhaled deeply, settling back into the makeshift bed Astarion had set out. My mind wandered into the deep and darkest recess of my mind. Digging up a past or rather my future if I didn’t change it, searching for anything that could help me- that could guide me. Flashes of pain that stretched from physical to mental flashed across my mind and it was all for naught. I stared at the place that was once filled with Astarions presence, wondering what I should do next. Of  course I wanted to wallow in fear and hide from my other part of my damned soul but what could that do? I would just let him become a victim to become someone that isn’t him.

Do you even know who he is? Who he truly is?

I squeezed my eyes shut, willing the thought away as I turned to face the opposite direction of where Astarion was laying. Regardless of all the ‘what if’s’ and ‘whys’ that ran rampant in my mind, I forced myself to lay still and keep my eyes shut until the comforting silence of sleep took over.

-

There was a buzz in the air and it wasn’t just from the bugs calling to each other with the sun beating down on them. The trek to the goblin camps was silent. Astarion didn’t return to the tent last night and I didn’t have the courage to start an argument right when I needed to focus on fighting goblins. Goblins wouldn’t be a problem if it weren’t for the sheer number they gather in. While they were gathered by several higher ups that actually knew how to strategies, they were harmless without someone to lead them. 

“Do you always walk so loud, my dear?”

I blinked, casting Astarion a sideways glance, “Do you always have the need to storm off when we should communicate?”

Astarions lips quirked into a small frown, “I didn’t see the need to discuss anything.”

I scoffed, rolling my eyes as I walked through the dense forest- suddenly self conscious about the way I walk. It was no surprise Astarion thought I was heavy footed since he was a rouge that lived most of his life slinking in the shadows. Being a sorceress did not require being silent and hiding in the shadows, not when I could easily cast spells that could injure people efficiently. There was a time when Karlach, Lae’zel, and Shadowheart tried teaching me something else other than spells. They claimed that relying on the weave was too risky since I was constantly fighting. They tried their best but the most I could grasp was how to wield a dagger. While Lae’zel grumbled about ‘sorcerers being unreliable in combat’ under her breath, Karlach and Shadowheart deemed it enough. Shadowheart said I would be alright as long as I knew how to stab someone with something sharp. 

Even though his talents were needed more than anything- anyone could swing a blade and hurt someone regardless if it was on purpose or not- no one could grasp how he walked so silently through any terrain. Even now, with all the fallen leaves, bramble, and branches littering our path, I couldn’t hear a single step. Where I had to concentrate to walk softly (which was useless since I would end up  making noise anyway) he did it with ease. 

Astarion stopped for a moment and I froze, looking around to see if there was anything nearby that would have made him stop. He angled his head, tilting it as if he was trying to listen better. Wordlessly, he turned on his heel and started walking in another direction. I moved to follow him but he looked at me over his shoulder, 

“I think it’s best if we separate.”

I gave him a wary look, hands coming to rest on my hips, “What? Why?”

“Do I really have to explain everything to you?” He replied through a clench jaw, his gaze hard as he looked at me. 

My jaw fell slack, looking at Astarion as if he wasn’t real and standing before me.

“Are you serious right now? I have no idea why you are so angry at me when all I wanted to do was help.” I replied roughly, face pinched into annoyance. I knew I shouldn’t be pushing his buttons, not when he was still the same person that tortured me time and time again. He wasn’t the Ascended Vampire I was familiar with but he would turn into him if I didn’t help him properly. I could either be pushing him towards losing himself or pulling him away and I had no idea if arguing with him was helping. 

“You dare speak to me like that? Like you are not beneath me.”

My whole body tensed. I knew that voice, it haunted my dreams and lurked in my memories. Astarion- no, he stalked towards me. His body was full of grace but I knew every bone in his body craved for violence, to breath in the taste of pain that would soon coat the air. I stumbled back, feets getting caught in the uneven floor of the forest. My back thudded against a tree and I watched with fear blown eyes as he came closer until we were chest to chest. His eyes met mine and I forced them to look away, to peer straight at his chest. There was no rise and fall of his chest, there was no warmth to his skin, Astarion was him and I had no idea how to handle it. 

I flinched slightly as his hand ran through my hair ever so gently. My jaw clenched tightly, I was surprised my teeth didn’t shatter. My eyes snapped shut as his face got closer, his lips whispering against the skin of my cheekbone. 

“Oh Darling,” He said lowly, his voice a rumble in his chest. “Look at me.” Suddenly, his hand yanked my head back harshly by the hair at the nape of my neck. I yelped, pain bursting through my skull. Instinctively, I grabbed hold of his wrist, looking at him with fear driven eyes. He tutted his lips, a mocking pout playing on his lips, “What ever should I do with you” he questioned himself, his words whispered against my skin. 

“Should I leave you here on the brink of death, leave you just alive enough to remain conscious to feel your body piercing itself together? Or should I take away the privilege of allowing you to withstand the sun? Maybe then you will learn to appreciate the kindness I have shown you.” 

His threats left their icy marks in my heart. Fear invaded my senses, my breathing harsh and rapid which was ridiculous. My lungs did not need air but the notion still forced me to spiral. 

“Please, Astarion.” I stuttered meekly, the grip I had on him tight but it didn’t do anything to deter him. It probably felt like nothing on him. He raised a white brow towards me, his head angling to the side. Without a word, he yanked my head back further, forcing me to crane my neck at a painful angle. 

“You are talking to a vampire ascendant. I am a God and you,” He bit out, “Are nothing.” His face was passive, no lines of emotions on his beautiful features. Sunlight shined down on him, his lashes almost a blinding white. How could something be so beautiful and cruel at the same time. How could my dead heart only feel alive when it was around him.

“I-I’m sorry, Lord Astarion.” 

It was easy to revert back into the mold I was taught how to fit into. It was easy to obey and beg for forgiveness. I felt many emotions at that moment but I mostly felt annoyed at how right he was. He was something while he was my everything. Only through him I was safe from the sun, safe from the bloodlust, but I wasn’t safe at the same time. I wasn’t safe from my very own savior. 

I was so frustrated that tears bubbled my eyes, blurring my vision. I felt my throat tighten, the familiar pain of sobs wanting to erupt coming unwelcome. I didn’t want to cry, it was the last thing I wanted to do but the sense of helplessness was too overbearing. I had forgotten what it felt like to be in love with a monster. To him I was nothing, but he was my everything. All I was his spawn, a thing that is used to please him and nothing more. I had forgotten what it felt like to be looked at not as a person but an object. 

Abruptly, he pulled away like my skin burned him. He flung himself away so hard that he collided into a tree across from me. I stood there frozen, watching as my lungs heaved in relief. I blinked back the unfallen tears, running my hands through my own hair as though to take away the taint of his harshness off my being. 

Astarion was leaning on the trunk, his hand gripping his chest like he meant to tear out his own heart. I gulped, swallowing my own shame and taking a step forward. It did not matter how scared I was. This was not normal and I had to figure out why. At the sound of my step Astarion flinched, his downcasted gaze meeting mine. I inhaled a sharp breath at the sight of the man who threatened to leave me to die here only seconds before look at me with such fear. Astarion stumbled away, his skin clammy with sweat and glinting in the rays of sun. 

“Stay away.”

His voice was so soft that it strained my eyes to hear him. My eyes narrowed in confusion. He suddenly looked like an animal that was cornered. He coward away from me, every small step I towards home resulted in him shuffling away as if moving away pained him. 

“Astarion,” I said as gently as I could even with anxiety choking me. “What’s wrong? What’s happening?”

Astarion doubled forward like an imaginary force hit him from behind. He gritted his teeth, his own fangs piercing into the sensitive flesh of his bottom lip. Droplets of blood bubbling from the small wounds. Sweat dripped down his brow, into his eye causing him to blink harshly. He glanced at me with pain narrowed brows, mumbling,  “I’m sorry” before he abruptly stumbled away disappearing into the dense forest. 

I stood in shock for longer than I would have liked. My mind paralyzed with shock as it witnessed something it’s never seen before. This had never happened before, the way he was present one moment before disappearing another. I quickly gathered my thoughts, running through the memories of my ‘past’ life to account how Astarion was after he returned from this expedition by himself. He returned with nothing other than himselfs even though he left with a vast amount of supplies just in case. He only had one thing with him and it was himself covered with blood that wasn’t his. It was only then that the first instance of what people knew as Astarion began to diminish. He smiled less, got irritated more often, the lines of emotion on his face began to fade. He loved me less and wanted me more. He was shorter with me, not wanting to explain his decisions to me no matter how much I pleaded. He wasn’t him yet but he was starting to become him. 

This could only mean one thing, something happened during his time handling the goblin camp that no one was able to witness or stop him from doing. And going off with what just happened, it hasn’t happened yet- if going off I was going off the previous interactions we’ve had. 

I swallowed the lump of nerves building in my throat down, determination filling my veins. I had to find Astarion before whatever happened in the past happens in the present. Even if it kills me. The only problem is, tracking him would almost be impossible since he was always soft footed and careful of his tracks. I only had one thing to go off of and that was the direction he ran in- to a place I knew would be there. A Goblin Camp.