#but you can’t get people to cooperate ig

[sixsidedsex]

Man. Never doing that again

[your-averagewriter]

"Only for you, darlin'"

Summary: Cooper heads into town in search for some RadAway for you when he stumbles upon a cute gift (Cooper Howard x fem!reader).

Word count: 1.0K

Warnings: needles, kissing (slightly ig)

-

-

Stalking through the desert, he heads towards the town in search of some RadAway for you, the radiation reaching too high of a level for Cooper to be comfortable with, especially in his presence.

His boots echo through the makeshift tunnel made of old tubing before sunlight peaks out of the other end, exposing the market on the other side, countless signs decorating the stalls. He pulls his hat down slightly in order to cover his irradiated face more, less because some people find it unsettling and more so people don’t recognise he’s a ghoul.

He walks along the stalls, searching for any RadAway and some other supplies that need topping up. 

Signs stick out to him yet none offer what he needs until he reaches a store with various niche medical supplies as well as bandages and the like. Walking up to the store, he looks over the small bottles and pills decorating the side but doesn't see anything Stimpaks or RadAway.

“Ay,” He gets the attention of the store owner. “You got any RadAway?” He asks, looking up at the man covered in shredded clothes. He shakes his head before looking down at what looks like an old graphic novel. “You sure? I got plenty of caps.”

“How many?” He asks, accent showing he’s not from around here.

“Plenty.” He reinterrates, shaking his bag causing the rattling of the caps and the man puts the graphic novel down, heading further into the shop before returning with a pouch of liquid with a strip of duct tape on, scraggly writing on it.

“I keep it in the back, people nick this stuff the most. 50 caps.” 

Cooper scoffs. “50?” He asks, confusion mixed with annoyance in his voice. “30.”

“45.” He counters. “And I’ll throw in a Stimpak.”

“Fine” Cooper counters and the seller sighs before pushing it towards him whilst Copper pushes the caps on the side. “And you got the good deal there, you should feel lucky I’m willing to pay for this.” He snatches it from the side, rolling his eyes before moving on to finding other items but glad he’s got what he came for.

Strolling through the town, he looks in the store windows, something catching his eye in a junk store. He pushes open the door, a bell ringing making him wonder if it’s a trap but why would there be a trap when someone is trying to sell junk?

“Hey darlin’, feel free to take a look around.” An old woman says, crazy hair covering most of her face making him feel uneasy that he can barely see her eyes. He nods before heading towards the window display, boots hitting the wooden planks underfoot noisily as they creak.

A toy rabbit sits in the window, no more than a foot tall with fluffy ears and a cute nose. He swipes at it, examining it and dusting it off before looking for some sort of price label.

“How much for this?” He turns to face the woman who pushes her glasses up, scrunching her nose as she squints at the item.

“8 caps, but for you 4. Who’s this for?” He pulls out another five caps and drops them on the table before carefully putting the bunny in his bag, making sure it’s tucked in and the clasp is shut properly. He pulls on the latch, checking its security. Secure. 

“My girl, she loves bunnies. Thanks.” He grumbles, walking out the store and off to the base again.

He walks back through the desert, kicking the sand as he goes, mumbling to himself and even whistling slightly. He lifts his hand to keep the sun out of his face as the base appears in his field of vision. Base is a strong word for a couple of broken down buildings just by the trees that are more secure than you would think. It provides cover and hides flames when it gets cold.

He can’t help the edges of his lips quirking up at the sight of the base and his girl.

Under an hour later, he returns to the base, stepping through the ‘door’. “Sweetheart?” He yells through the base.

“Cooper, that you?” You ask, sweet voice ringing through the walls.

“‘Course it’s me.” He grins to himself, following your voice.

“I don’t know why you wouldn’t let me come with you.” You say before being interrupted by a cough. After moments of coughing, Cooper rubs your back and once you start speaking, he reaches into his bag.

“Did you get a Stim-” You start but he passes it to you with a brief kiss to the cheek. “Thanks.” You smile before looking down at the Stimpak wrapped in a cloth. Taking it out, your eyes are immediately on the needle, you take a pause and deep breath before injecting it into your thigh.

Letting out a breath, you drop the used Stimpak and look back to Cooper who wears a smirk, holding back a laugh.

“What are you laughing about?” You cock an eyebrow.

“You ain’t scared of no mutants, no raiders, nothing but needles.” He chuckles, his accent prominent. “It’s cute.” He says before remembering the bunny toy in his bag. “I got you something in town.” He says, rootling through his bag.

“More RadAway?” You ask, knowing his paranoia about you getting too much radiation when being around him. 

“Yeah, but I got you something else too.” He pulls the bunny out of his bag. “Now I know it ain’t much, but I saw it and thought you’d like it…” He presents the bunny, quickly brushing off some of the sand from the journey.

“Aww.” You can help but coo at the cute bunny, taking it off of him and holding it gently, picking up one of the ears and letting it flop back down. “You didn’t spend too much on it, did you?” You look back over to him.

“Y’know it’s rude to ask about someone’s finances, sweetheart.” He teases. “Besides, the lady gave it to me for cheap, probably knew I was getting it for my girl.”

“Probably knew you were a softie.” You tease.

“Only for you, darlin’.” He picks up your hand and leans down, kissing it playfully.

-

AN: I can't believe I haven't posted anything for over three months… sorry I've had exams and extra and it's just been stressful so hopefully I can get a bit more on track.

I hope you enjoyed reading!

[blarefordaglare]

A very horrible, bad, never again prom

Gonna try to go all out with a modern AU in this one! Or in other words: time and malon adopted and raised/raising 8 children because why not. 

This takes place when sky is like 17 btw, so someone plz help me do the math for the rest, but just assume everyone is like children ig haha, this is Junior prom because I never went to any prom and Junior year is kinda easier maybe to write with? Because it’s just not the last one? Idk I sucked at school so what do I know

TW: swearing (uncensored), Overstimulation, alcohol, one small mention of sex, very poorly written high school dance scene from someone who had no experience with it so it sounds straight from Hollywood. 

_____

“How come I can’t go?” Wind whined,   tugging on Time’s shirt, his grip stretching the grey fabric, “It’s not fair.” His brow creased, lips forming a pout.

Time sighed, detangling Wind’s hands from the cloth, “You’re going to get wrinkles like me if you keep scowling like that,” he chided gently, “And second graders have no major academic accomplishments to celebrate.” 

“I’ll let you know I memorized all my addition facts up to ten!” 

The conversation seized to a halt as soft footsteps pattered past the doorway, revealing Sky, hair finally combed, and a dark green suit fitting loosely around his physique, “Mom?” He called out, “Where did you put my tie?” 

The red haired mother in question peeked out from the kitchen, “I thought you didn’t want to wear one?” She sighed as she reached over to the kitchen counter, “Knew you’d change your mind though. And please, this time no stains. You know juice is impossible to get out.” 

The brunette nodded as he looked over to his father, “Can you please help me put it on?” He sheepishly asked. At seventeen he should have known to properly tie a tie, yet his fingers would never cooperate in said fashion, “I’m sorry.” 

Time gave a sympathetic smile, shaking his head, “We’ll learn another time, but it’s your big night tonight.” He quickly adjusted the fabric around the teenager’s neck, centering it to complete the outfit. 

“Freshman should be able to go,” Legend grumbled by the couch, flipping through channels, “Give me a break from all these menaces in here.” 

“Says the one who wears underwear with bunnies on it like a baby!” The long haired blonde shoved the boy, trying to steal the remote from him, “Give me that! I want to watch my shows! Not your boring ones!”

“Boys!” Time called, “This is no time to argue, now say goodbye to Sky.” The man’s head pierced with a developing headache, making a mental note to take some Tylenol later. 

Wild and Legend looked up at their older brother in shame, before slowly walking over to give him a hug, “Bye Sky, we’ll miss you.”

“I’ll miss you guys too,” He wrapped his arms around the children before quickly pulling away, “Love you!” He waved a quick goodbye before sprinting out of the house. 

“I’m worried for him.” Time deadpans, looking over to Malon, “First dance, no date.” 

“I didn’t even have a dance fairy boy.” 

A quick jog later, and the high school doors flew open. The room held a dark sprinkled with lights of color that the teenager didn’t even know existed until then. His eyes quickly scanned around the vast room, attempting to find someone-anyone-he remotely knew. 

“Hey man,” Sky quickly whipped his head around, stumbling on the ground that shook from the dancing, only to be met with a familiar red hair, confident smile, and amber eyes, “How are you enjoying the party?” Groose asked, “In my opinion it’s pretty boring.” 

Boring? Boring? Sky took a second to process what he just heard. It’s loud, flashy, and many people here, how could it be boring? “Yeah, it really could use some spicing up.” He quickly forced, trying to save face. 

As Groose waved a goodbye, Sky made a beeline for the food stand, silently praying to Hylia that the vast amount of options would give him the chance to focus on something and not go insane. 

His eyes of hope quickly went to eyes of disappointment as the options lay in front of him. Everything looked gross, nothing like mom’s cooking at home. He wanted to go home. He was going to stay and make the most of this party, prove that he’s mature enough to handle these kinds of situations. 

Grabbing a cup of fruit punch, the brunette quietly retreated into a quieter corner of the room, granted it still was bursting his ear drums, but at least there was a minuscule amount of peace involved. Bringing the plastic cup to his lips he attempted to down some of the liquid, yet his mouth felt a bitter taste as his eyes widened with panic at the unfamiliar sensation, and without a second thought his hand froze, dropping the punch onto the suit.

The moment of realization hit like a title wave, the suit! His mind screamed at him, go, clean it up! His body couldn’t move, frozen with embarrassment. His eyes burned with shame as his body wrapped in on itself, curling into a ball and finally resting on the cool, shaking ground.

The room spun around him, lights stabbing his sensitive eyes, music he hated waving over him like a title wave. Waves of anxiety washed through his body, his figure shaking perpendicular to the room. Fingers reaching out for his phone, he opened up messages.

Dad can help. Dad can come get me. 

His fingers tried to type an explanation, but it all ended up futile, the bright phone screen shutting down to an eerie black. No contact. No safety. No desire to stay. 

The held tears in his eyes finally released, saltwater falling down his face, a quiet, yet painful sob escaped his throat, his eyes shut closed, in attempt to block out the intensity taking place in front of him. 

“Hey, Mom told me you forgot your shoes-“ Sky blinked up at the voice above him, noticing a familiar blonde wearing a signature blue scarf, “Woah, what happened to you?” 

The brunette couldn’t find the words to describe the horrors of this dance, it wasn’t even a dance! It was a death party at best, “I wanna go home.” He mumbled, tears pooling onto the ground, “I hate it here.” 

“But prom is so much fun!” Warriors quickly spoke, then realized his mistake, “Well, granted I went to boarding school. Are you sure you want to leave?” He grabbed a cloth from his pocket, urging his younger brother to wipe his tears before standing up, “Come on, let’s go.” 

As they exited through the big doors, Sky could feel his ears burn. Everyone else was having fun, so why couldn’t he? Stupid, his mind rang out again, couldn’t even handle a small dance. 

As he stepped into the passenger seat, he couldn’t deny the mix of relief and shame swirling in his heart, as he gazed longingly at the window, he felt the urge to speak up, “Are you going to tell dad?” He knew that he tried to text him before, but the feeling of embarrassment wasn’t any less.

“Only if you want me to.” His brother’s eyes were focused on the road, hands gripping tightly, but not tensely on the wheel, “My first dance I got laid and you didn’t see me tell them.” 

A wet giggle escaped the other, tears finally drying onto his face as he looked down at his socks, how did he forget shoes? “Well you’re gonna have to come up with a lie on why we are home so early.” 

“Who said anything about going home?” Pulling over to a small cafe, Warriors urged Sky out of the car, “You must be starving, and no spoiled drinks this time, I promise.”

“How did you..?”

“Please, it’s a room full of teenagers that finally get a night out, who wouldn’t want to remember, or I guess, forget it?”

[asordinaryppl]

A3! Main Story: Part 4 - Act 14: DREAM CATCHER - Episode 1: To The Next Season

Ibuki: Hmm… Something’s not right.

Ibuki: What about this angle… Hmm.

Ibuki: (I can’t really decide… I wonder if I can find some inspiration somewhere.)

Ibuki:  …

Ibuki: (Even TikTak has been full of promo videos for theater companies lately.)

Ibuki: Ah, “Get To Know MANKAI Company”?

Ibuki: (MANKAI Company, eh…)

Iv has entered the chat momo: eugh… i probably messed up… Iv: wassup? momo: no… i just got a little carried away… ig Kar: idgi shiki: you’re always free to tell us if something’s bothering you

-

Sakuya in the video: “Thank you very much!”

Masumi in the video: “Thank you very much.”

-

Muku: *dreamy sigh* … The RomiJuli sequel was so good.

Tenma: Thinking back to your debut really does make one emotional.

Kumon: It’s so awesome how you can tell how much they’ve grown as they play the same role!

Yuki: It’s like their growth as actors is linked to their characters’ personal growth.

Kazunari: Pretty much. It’s like there’s some synergy going on~

Misumi: I can’t wait for our “Water Me!” sequel~

Muku: Me neither! I wonder what kind of story it’ll be?

Tenma: We have to show that we’ve grown just as much as the Spring Troupe has

Muku: … Huh?

Izumi: What’s wrong?

Muku: The boy in the audience in this video… Isn’t he Masumi-kun’s fan?

Izumi: Ah, you’re right. That’s Towa-kun.

Tenma: Is that the fan that came to talk to Tsuzuru-san the other day?

Izumi: Yeah.

Muku: So he managed to get a ticket for the first day. I’m glad.

Izumi: He said it’d be his first time watching a performance in a theater, he must’ve been very emotional.

Izumi: (If anything, he was a little too emotional. I’d have never expected him to say what he did…)

[Flashback starts]

Towa: … Tsuzuru Minagi-sensei!! I want you to write a script for my troupe!! Please!!

Tsuzuru: Eh? … EHHHH!?

Tsuzuru: You want me to write a script?

Towa: Yes!

Sakuya: That’s amazing! Have you created a troupe?

Towa: Um, I plan to start creating it from now on…

Izumi: Have you gathered members?

Towa: N-No… I plan to start doing that.

Masumi: In other words, it’s just you right now.

Towa: But I… want to create a troupe just like MANKAI Company!

Towa: When I participated in the Spring Troupe's workshop, I learned a little about how plays are created, and what it feels like to stand on stage...

Towa: And I became more interested in theater.

Towa: And then, when I actually watched the Spring Troupe’s performance in a theater, I was moved in a way I’ve never been before.

Towa: Thanks to the hard work of many people, the play takes on a real form on top of the stage, and the actors truly shine…

Towa: It made me think that I want to stand on that stage as well. I want to try shining the way everyone does…

Towa: This may be too simple, and my way of thinking might be naive, but…

Towa: I feel like fate brought me here, to find what I want to do, and to discover theater!

Tsuzuru: … I see. Fate, huh?

Towa: I’m sorry, this probably seems really stupid to you…

Izumi: Not at all.

Tsuzuru: I’ve also felt this way, so I get it.

Sakuya: I also felt that way when I first experienced theater.

Citron: We totally understand Towa’s feels~!

Izumi: Moments like that do happen. I believe that if you feel like you’re destined to act, then that means you have the talent for it.

Tsuzuru: I understand your motivation, and I’d love to cooperate with you. But when you’re the only member in the troupe…

Tsuzuru: Performing a one-person act as a beginner is pretty difficult, so I’d rather your troupe has at least 4 members.

Towa: I need 3 more…

Towa: … I understand! I’ll find them!

Tsuzuru: Alright. I’ll be waiting.

Izumi: Do your best.

Sakuya: We’ll be cheering for you!

Towa: Thank you very much!

[Flashback ends]

Izumi: (I do wonder how things are going with Towa-kun’s company, but I have to prioritize the Summer Troupe’s performance.)

Izumi: (Our ranking may have improved, but we’re still far from the Fleur Award…)

Izumi: (The new companies are all rapidly gaining momentum, so we need to keep our guard up as we move to 2Q…)

previous episode (act 13) | masterpost | next episode

[that-sarcastic-writer]

Upon a second watch of the trap and analyzing it from a psychological perspective (not taking into account the silly direction and at times nonsensical plot holes and character choices) and not a horny perspective, I think it’s so facilitating. Gonna leave my in depth thoughts below.

I think it’s fascinating how cooper just bullshited his way through the entirety of the concert. He didn’t know what the fuck was happening but he adapted to his surroundings and manipulated every single person he encountered in such a clever and cold way. He smiled in people’s faces as he listened to the police radio, he sneaked into a swat meeting and was even like “wow! You guys are huge!” (Which like lol no baby YOU are with your 6’3 mf ass). And his switch of body language as soon as he stepped out. He just seemed to know exactly what to say and what to do, and if it didn’t work, he thought of something else. I also want to note I find amusing that he almost thought of it as a game, in typical sociopath fashion (which yes ik is an outdated term but saying APD seems a little too clinical for my horny blog), he kinda enjoyed the chase and was even making faces at the description of himself (he also laughed at lady raven when she was like “you’re such a good boy”). He was very unbothered and collected up until he realized his perfect life was ruined, that the perfect image his family had of him was gone (the two lives mixed). Which is very on par with his antisocial personality traits.

Though I will acknowledge the fact that man actually was being dumb asf going back to the house knowing Rachel was the one that ratted him out (yes ig he didn’t know for sure but he suspected it, and let’s be real, he’s smart enough to piece it together without Rachel telling him verbatim). Unless maybe he wanted to get caught? It just seemed like very impulsive thing to do, which doesn’t seem on character for his more cold and calculating personality. His survival was the most important to him (other than his perfect dad of the year and upstanding member of society persona) and I don’t think it made sense for him to go back to the house and top of that eat something from Rachel when he suspected her, but then again maybe he wanted to get caught (or this is just bad character choice).

I also think it was incredibly dumb on his part to straight up tell lady raven he was the butcher. When this happened my expectation was that he’d kill her before she told everyone? I mean I can see why logically that’d be complicated but I expected a better outcome. It didn’t sit right with me that suddenly the focus was shifted to her and in the process they made him panic and make impulsive decisions (i.e run after her and pound on the bathroom door in front of his family, try to kidnap her instead). For someone who was shown to be incredibly smart and calculating and was described to never panic, this seemed like a very rash choice. Like what did you think was going to happen? But this movie does have character flaws and plot issues so I can’t be too critical.

Going back to the positives, another thing I found fascinating is once again his ability to manipulate every situation to his favor. Realistically speaking, in no sane world would a bunch of swat officers allow a suspected serial killer to grab something, they’d be dragging him to the van. But they allowed him to fix the bike. And the reason why I think Cooper knew this would work was because he already knew they knew he had OCD, so they knew if he had a “compulsion” he had to do it or else he would potentially lash out or get violent (this is typical when a compulsion can’t be accomplished there is a lot of anxiety that may lead to aggressive behavior or some type of breakdown). The thing was, this wasn’t a compulsion. He didn’t need to fix the bike. But the cops didn’t know this. Hence why (in my in movie understanding, regardless of logic) he was able to get the metal thing. But what’s funny about this is that you can see it in his face as he’s undoing the cuffs he’s like ooh and he laughs. I think cause he realized that he actually got away with that, that he manipulated everyone to his advantage once again, even when he was supposed to be “under control” and “subjected”. Even in cuffs he manages to be in control of the situation by coming up with ways to manipulate people to benefit his survival.

And I think that’s wonderful. I often enjoy seeing sociopaths actually be sociopaths (from a scientific standpoint as a psychology major) Like the level of manipulation and calculating cleverness (Dexter is my biggest example of this). Regardless if this movie is good or bad (I think it’s alright but it does fall apart after the concert), I think Josh (my hubby) did a fantastic job with what he was given. His mannerisms and facial expressions were so on point you could tell when he was being himself and when he was putting on the act. It was fantastic.

Anyway Josh I love you and everything you do, you’re so perfect you made this nonsensical silly movie enjoyable <3

[burnwater13]

Grogu looked at his drawing and sighed. It wasn’t quite right. He didn’t like when that happened. It made him sad and kind of annoyed. He had an image in his head and he wanted to replicate that image and his hands just wouldn't do it. 

He had tried to blame his tools, the crayons and markers that the Mandalorian gave him, but his dad said it wasn’t their fault. Wow. That was mean. If Grogu couldn’t blame his tools that meant he was to blame. Ouch. 

He was just learning and trying and he wished the crayons were more like IG-11 and could learn to do what he wanted them to do without him having to all the work all the time.

Oh, he knew that Din Djarin hadn’t meant to be harsh. He was trying to get Grogu to appreciate that he needed to understand and practice with the tools more and slowly build up to making the perfect art he was attempting. 

Apparently that’s how Mandalorians learned everything. Slowly, through practice and relentless repetition. But he thought that was far too slow. He just wanted to be good. Like instantly. No long hours of practice required. 

When he explained that to the Mandalorian, Din had laughed and shook his head gently. 

“Grogu, people aren’t just born doing things perfectly. It all takes time.”

Uff. But he didn’t have time. He’d heard that High Magistrate Karga’s naming day was coming up and he wanted to make the leader of Nevarro a great present to celebrate. He knew his dad had already purchased a container of medallion polish for the their friend. Uff. Grogu couldn’t get him more of that! He needed to make something that the High Magistrate could appreciate for years to come. A work of art.

He was trying to recapture that moment when his dad and Cobb Vanth had fought the Krayt dragon on Tatooine, because he’d heard the High Magistrate say that if there wasn't a vid, it didn’t really happen. But it had happened and Grogu was going to prove it by drawing a holo-realistic picture of the moment when they realized they’d needed a bigger boat… load of munitions. Cobb’s tiny missile from his Mandalorian armor just wasn’t going to do the trick. 

Grogu knew it was a complicated scene and that he needed to show a lot of details and get them correct and layered into he drawing in a compelling but still realistic way. And he was doing pretty well until Lefty and Righty got out of control. Lefty being his left hand and Righty, well, you get the vid. 

Lefty was in charge of crayons and Righty was in charge of the markers. Generally that worked well, but Lefty had grabbed a marker to do an outline and Righty reached for it, but since it wasn’t there it had grabbed the wrong color marker and now he had a bantha that was blue instead of brown!

His dad had said he thought the High Magistrate would like that, but Grogu knew he was just being optimistic. If Grogu had more markers, then the whole mix up could have been avoided. As it was a blue bantha was all the proof the High Magistrate would need to say it never happened and was just a dream or a ‘concept’.  Uff. It was not a concept! It had been reality for a teeny, tiny amount of time. No, Grogu would have to start over and that was disappointing. 

“Buddy, can’t you just color over the blue?”, his dad asked.

Grogu sighed. He’d been thinking about getting a snack because he was so annoyed and kind of sad. Food always made him feel better, at least for a little while. Could he just color over the blue? He didn’t think so. That was how he’d planned things. But… maybe? 

“I thought you could make brown from mixing green with orange?”

Grogu almost snorted at that. Of course you could make brown from green and orange! But he had blue… on the picture. Hmm… green was just blue and yellow… ha! He could do that. If he was careful and if Lefty and Righty learned to cooperate. It could work… that would save a lot of time! 

He’d have to run a test first in case he and his dad were wrong, but if the test worked, he would have a solution to his problem. Yippee!

Grogu hopped down from his chair and ran over to his dad and gave him a hug. Well, he gave his dad’s neck a hug. Same thing. Maybe he didn’t really need new tools. He just needed a little help from his dad. 

Nah, he needed more crayons and markers, but he was really glad the Mandalorian had figured out a temporary solution for him. This must be the Way. 

[natalie-k-pan]

10 Ways the Loki show Disappointed Me

part two

6) The trailer was misleading advertising. Marvel’s done it in the past with little to no backlash:

Iron Man 3 presenting the Mandarin as the ultimate foe for Tony to defeat, only to find out he’s a charlatan in a minor role.

Falcon and Winter Soldier was presented as a light-hearted buddy adventure, only to tackle darker themes about nationalism and racism. (Not saying that those themes were bad, just that the TFAWS’s trailer was not truthful to the story).

In the case of Loki, the trailer presented the plot as Loki making time-traveling shenanigans and being captured for breaking the timeline. They included the D.B Cooper clip, and the scenes of Loki in New York and as king in Asgard. These clips never show up in season 1. The D.B Cooper scene was a off-the-cuff moment, and the highly-anticipated (imo) President Loki was around for five minutes.

The trailer shows the storyline being about Loki breaking the timeline, with Mobius saying in a voiceover, “You picked up the tesseract, breaking reality. I want you to help us fix it.”

Marvel’s publicity team knew what story we would want to see from the character. And that’s not what we got: it was a mix of Loki tagging along with Sylvie to take down the Timekeepers, and detective-esque  scenes of trying to overthrow the TimeKeepers. 

It was never about Loki having an adventure, breaking the timeline, and having to fix it.

There’s a difference between having scenes that don’t make it into the final product, between not revealing enough of the story to spoil plot twists...and deliberately choosing certain scenes and quotes  to present a false version of the story.

I guess Marvel was worried that no one would watch it if they showed us the real product.

7)    Loki’s powers were wildly inconsistent, especially compared to what we’ve seen before.

In the past, we’ve seen Loki do illusions, duplication casting and in Thor 2, some very light telekinesis. After hearing of his mother’s death, he throws several pieces of furniture in into the cell walls with his mind. This is after losing the person who probably mattered most to him at the time, and feeling responsible for her death--it’s a powerful move showing his magical capabilities.

In the show, in Episode 3 we see him pull a Roomba towards himself in order to use it as a shield during a fight--pretty in-line with what we saw in the Dark World.

One episode later, an entire flipping tower is falling towards them, and he reverses it with his mind alone.

It was in the face of death, you say. Of course he was going to pull some cool new magical move.

Sure. In the face of death, I could see him jumping from throwing chairs to something heavier, like maybe a crumbling wall or a fruit stand.

BUT A TOWER?

 WHY?

 HOW??

He’s never done anything on that scale magically. In episode 2, he got tossed around by a (human) Alabama man. Why would he not use that move to bring the roof crumbling down if he was fighting for his life then?

So he’s got massive telepathic power when a building is falling but can’t use it in a fight against regular people.... okay?

Honestly, due to the fact that they’ve weakened him so much, and when Loki said, “I think we’re stronger than we realize”, I’m betting Season 2 will include Loki discovering the extent of his magical powers. 

 I don’t like this idea because again, it contradicts the previous canon. In Thor 1, Hogun literally calls Loki a “master of magic”. He went toe-to-toe with Thor and the Avengers and now can’t beat regular humans. A thousand+ year old being unaware of his own untapped potential doesn’t seem correct (yeah, they did that with Thor in Ragnarok, I know).

This Loki’s power levels jump up and down according to the plot, trying to make us believe that due to his spoiled past, Loki needs to apply himself to learn more about his powers.

 8)  Loki was out of character.

His lying and scheming was way too obvious. I was incredibly confused the first couple of episodes because it would be strange how he would be a pathetic buffoon  one minute and yet The only moment I was sold on his competence as a liar was episode 2 at the renaissance fair where he attempts to fool  the TVA. He was actually competent for once, but he gets caught, and goes into apologizing and sucking up 30 seconds later.   

He gets drunk when they’re on the mission on Lamentis. This didn’t make sense--when he was trying to conquer Earth, he had the opportunity to also goof off and he’s always been shown to take things seriously, with the exception of Ragnarok.                                                 

The “I’m a narcissist” scene. While Loki is the type to crave attention--in Avengers, Tony calls him a diva who wants his name plastered to the skies--it comes from a place of feeling overshadowed, never able to match his brother Thor.  Which we can see has some basis:

In Thor 1, his adopted parents raised him to hate his race,

lied to him about it,

 and when he was hanging over an wormhole, his father finally rejected him.

In Avengers, Thor tells him in  that his slights are “imagined”. 

 Thor 2, his adopted father told him his “birthright was to die”.

While it doesn’t excuse his actions in Thor and Avengers, it’s pretty clear that his family, particularly his father, have let him down.

So to make him experience character development and understand why he does what he does...the writers took him back to Asgard, and had Sif beat him up repeatedly until he admits he does terrible things because he’s a...narcissist.

It was pretty hard to watch that scene, especially because I related to Loki as someone who felt overshadowed and overlooked. He tried too hard to be what his family wanted, to show that he was “the worthy son”.

But here in the fantastic year of 2021, this show decided to throw away all of that emotional nuance away.

 9) The costumes were bad.

The brown variant jacket with its ugly orange block letters.

The guard suit on Lamentis looked like a cross between a purple sweater and a plague doctor mask. honestly makes me shuder to see it

Loki’s green-and-gold costumes are some of the most distinct, instantly recognizable outfits of the MCU. And he almost immediately loses it in the first episode. It ends being given to Sylvie, (like most of Loki’s better characteristics) and he stays in a detective skinny-tie suit instead. The costume is okay, but it lacks the flair and style he’s had previously, and he never gains it back.

10) The season finale really did showcase this show in the best way-- ig hype followed by disappointment.

For five episodes, we rushed towards the ultimate villain, the mastermind behind it all. Episode 6 was like...being handed a pack of bubble wrap, swinging your hand hard, expecting that satisfying pop! only to have it slowly putter out with a sad little sound.

First, Kang looked like he got his costume from Party City. The purple cape isn’t doing him any favors. Then, the man sat there and monologued for forty minutes, making jokes, telling us how he set the plot up, and how the multiverse worked.

 I know Marvel gets flack for there always being an CGI climactic action scene, but…they had 6 episodes leading up to the Big Bad, and for it to end that anticlimactically with a man in a Party City purple cape was a letdown. The finale had no menace, no teeth. In the words of Mobius, it was just…talkie-talkie.

All in all, this show really suffered from ignoring Loki’s past, where he would realistically be emotionally-wise, and a lack of focus on its title character’s development. Settings and costumes being better/unique would be also be nice, especially given its popularity. At the end of the day, I don’t see the character I empathized so strongly with in this show.

[suckmybigtoeoikawa]

Can you do a Tsukishima x black fem reader where he teases them alot about being dark skinned. Maybe lightly angsty, and can end up NSFW? 👉🏾👈🏾

Suree 😛👀

warning: slight angst(?) (bullying ig), sub reader, dom tsukishima, fingering, outside (so like public), if you really look hard enough there’s cum eating

***

Being black in Japan was hard. people always looked at you and would sometimes come up to you and touch you, like on on your arm or your hair. Children would say things like “why is she so much darker than me?” and you can’t blame the child but damn, you just wanted to beat the shit out of that kid

and it didn’t really get any better at school. People would be so ignorant at times it’s scary. Tsukishima would just sit there and watch as they would tell your insecurities. Sometimes Tsukishima would tease you too.

“Hey chocolate” he would say

“..”

he sits down behind you and you focus on your class. The teacher says that they have to do a group project and you can already feel yourself tense up. Your mind was all over the place you were thinking about who you did wanna be paired up with and who you didn’t. Ofc Tsukishima was one of the people you didn’t want to be paired up with.

“this project will be a month long so let’s all get used to each other” the teacher says

you wanted to be with your friend and you were praying that you get to choose your partners, but guess whattttt… you couldn’t.. and then on top of that you had to work with Tsukki 😀

you turned around to look at him and he just looked right back at you dead in the eyes and said “okay come here coco puffs”…………..

“please don’t call me that”

“okay coco”

dis nigga 🤨👊🏾

“okay so are you gonna come here” you say completely ignoring his comment

“no you come here” he responds, it’s like he was testing you. like really, and it was so irritating.

“i’m not gonna argue with you today”

“i’m not gonna either, so come here” tsukishima says with a grin

you huff and walk over to the open seat next to him. you rest your head on your hand and don’t say a word to him.

“coco, the project isn’t gonna work it’s self” he says

“if you call me by my name then i’m going to work with you”

“y/n”

your not even gonna lie, him calling you by your name gave you butterflies. The way he said it like he needed you, made you so flustered.

You slowly looked at him and he looked at you so plain.

“yes” you say

“stop looking slow and work on this project with me”

and just like that your butterflies went away, telling him that you didn’t like the names he was calling you didn’t do anything because he would keep on going.

week 1

the first few days of the project were really hard with him because he wouldn’t cooperate. but soon you realize how sweet he could be and how nice he could also be. You learned a lot about him when you went over his house to work on the project.

his mom and brother would always share stories about him when he was younger and the photos on the walls were share so much about his childhood.

“aww look at your smile” you say cooing at the baby photo of Tsukishima

“oh my gosh, let’s go” he said shooing you out the living room, while blushing.

“you used to be such a happy child, what happened?” you say

“y/n just come on”

“nooo tell mee” you protest

“i’ll just tell you in my room come on”

“alright but i want the full story”

you guys both make it into his room, that you were now familiar with. the shelves that held dinosaur figures, his jersey nearly hanging up next to it. you sat down on his bad and he sat in the chair at his desk.

“so care to explain why you don’t smile like that anymore”

he explained why in the most vague way possible. but you kind of understood it really was hard for him to explain. He wasn’t 100% comfortable with you just yet and clearly this question was hard for him to answer.

“hmm, well thank you for telling me, now let’s start with the project”

“alright”

week 2

Tsukishima was starting to treat you nicer. He started to protect you more and stand up for you more in school. His height was scare your bullies away, and once again you weren’t complaining.

Even outside of school you guys started talking more. A lot happened over the 2 weeks and everything was so nice. He would still tease you but it would’ve about your skin, and he would call you by your name and some dumb as fuck nickname.

“you know i can talk for myself right?” you blurt out

you and Tsukishima were at a park working on the project. The area was secluded by trees and there was a table in the middle of the beautiful area.

“yes i know” he responds

“Hmm okay”

he continues to type away on his computer and you do the same but not as much. Resulting in him asking you: “what’s wrong”

“hmm, nothing” you say quietly

“bullshit, tell me”

“…. okay, i was just thinking about why your so nice to me all of a sudden, like you went from calling me names, to almost punching someone in the face over then saying something about me”

“… okay and” he says vaguely and continuing to type

“tsukki, i’m just curious”

“about” he says

you noticed that the conversation wasn’t gonna go anywhere. Not unless you confessed that you liked him, but you didn’t want to mistake him being nice to him liking you. So you just backed down

“nothing, can you tell me what you got for lesson 3”

week 3

Your time with Tsukki was running out and you wanted to tell him that you liked him. the time was ticking. you didn’t know how to tell him and your kid was racing with different ideas. like: ‘does he like me back’ ‘ if i tell him i like him will he stop talking to me’ ‘if i tell him i like him will he tease me’ ‘would he tell everyone?’

The anticipation was killing you and every time you saw him you felt like your heart was gonna jump out your body. You just felt like you needed to tell him by the end of the project, BUT HOWWW

you decided to tell him straight up.

It was a nice warm day and you guys decided to meet his house. you were oddly quiet and even tsukki picked up on this.

“y/n what’s happening”

“hmm. oh nothing i was just thinking about something”

“what was is it”

THIS WAS YOUR TIME!!!

“uhm, i like you”

silence not only filled the room but embarrassment fill you up too.

“okay in sorry forget I said that”

“…ok”

DID THIS NIGGA JUST SAY “ok”

you guys continue working not saying a word to each other.

week 4

you guys still worked on the project but you couldn’t help but still be embarrassed, you hated that you did that it was on you mind the whole week. this was the last week you and Tsukki were working together.

you guys both met at the park from last 2 weeks ago, in the same spot. once again you guys were both quite around each other, only asking questions if you needed to.

the strange thing about today was that Tsukishima was sitting next to you. he usually kept his distance from you and sat cross from you. he was sitting fairly close to you too. if this was happening 2 weeks ago you probably would have asked him why he was sitting so close, but you didn’t have the strength to ask him today.

“y/n” he says out of no where

“yes?” you respond still invested in the project

“look at me please”

RUNNING LAPS HOLD UP

you look at him and he continues

“so i’ve been thinking about what you told me last week and.. uhm.. i like you too”

OH MA GAWD, LAWD HAVE MURTHY

“wait what 😀” you say

“yeah i like you too” he places his hand on you thigh

you slowly look down at his hand, in utter shock

“and uhm” he starts to rub your thigh “i was actually think about.. how good of a couple we’d be”

WHY IS HE SO BOLD

truth be told, he actually thought about you a lot, and he thought about how beautiful the contrast between your skin was to his, and how each time you guys stood next to each other heads would turn because of how beautiful you too would look together. (girl i’m writing this getting butterflies stfu)

he would fall asleep at night thinking about you moaning.

his hand moved to your chin and pulled you into kiss him.

the kiss was so passionate. it wouldn’t be bad to say that he was apologizing for all the teasing he said in the past through this kiss.

your other hands are now in his hair pulling him deeper into thee kiss. kind of like you were accepting his apology.

he pulls away from the kiss. “come here” he stands up and walks to the end of the table. you walk over to where he is and he picks you up onto the table. His licks go straight to your neck.

“wait, wait, we’re outside” you say

“okay.” he continues to kiss your neck

it’s not like anyone was gonna see you, the area was hidden away from the rest of the park.

“no one can see us” he says, still pecking at your neck

he stops kissing your neck “i mean, you don’t have to do this, we don’t have to do this” he continues

you eagerly respond “no no, i want to”

“good” he continues to kiss your neck

you hold onto the nape of kiss neck as he continues. you feel him smile in your neck as you whimper a little bit.

he hands rubs up and down your thighs, and it’s so slow, it’s painful. you wanna know what he’s gonna do next.

“lean back” he says pushing you back.

he takes off your skirt and starts to rub his finger over your clothed cunt. you jump at his touch and move a little.

he takes off your underwear and you move your hips a little due to the breeze of wind.

“be a good girl and stay quiet, okay?”

“okay” you whimper

he starts to rub his fingers around your pussy, making you whimper louder.

he starts to rub around your clit painfully slow, making you even more wetter. he starts to rub his finger over the opening of your pussy.

“please” you moan

“please, what?”

“please, put one finger in”

“mm, wait princess”

despite him saying “wait” he still puts one finger in, and pushes your leg back. Just as you were getting comfortable, he pulls his finger back out and rubs a circle around your opening again.

you whine in desperation, hating and loving the feeling.

“remember.. you have to stay quiet.. can you do that” he says still rubbing your opening, this time a little bit faster.

“yes yes i know” you say quickly

“good..” he sticks in one of his fingers and your pussy just sucks him in.

you start to let loud a low moan, feeling his long finger inside you. he keeps on pumping his finger in back and forth and you grip down harder each time.

“damn.. your just sucking my fingers in, aren’t you” he says lowly

you nod your head in pleasure and throw your head back. he goes a little bit more faster and pushing your leg back even more, and without warning he sticks in 2 fingers.

you let out a louder and lewder moan and cry out his name.

“shh, shhh, shh” he says leaning in to kiss you

he pulls you into a desperate kiss and he keeps on rapidly moving his finger in and out of you.

“auuh, i’m gonna cum” you let out

“okay then do it, cum on my fingers, right now”

you feel your stomach twist and turn as you feel like your about to cum

“cum on fingers, right now, baby” he whispers in your ear

he keeps moving his fingers and the lewd noises from your pussy and your moans fill up the quiet area, and Tsukki loved it. he loved seeing how much of a slut you were for him.

“tsukki” you drag out his name and hold onto his wrist but your not able to hold on due to how fast he was going

“come on do it, be a slut for me, mm”

and from those words you came on his fingers. He kept on pumping his fingers in and out still but slowly, as if he was tryna savor the moment. He finally remove your fingers and sticks them in your mouth, the same fingers he was fingering you with.

“good girl”

******

MasterList

IM SORRY IF THAT WAS TOO SHORT 😅 I WAS REALIZING HOW LONG THIS WAS TAKING ME

(and yes i am working on some other request too so be ready for that 😃)

I hope you enjoyed it 🤍 Please Like,Reblog, comment what you think and follow 🤍 have a great day 🤍

[hrtiu]

Why The Believer is my favorite episode of The Mandalorian

There are a lot of unforgettable moments in The Mandalorian. Maybe your favorite episode is the season 2 finale, with those iconic Chanel boots. Maybe your favorite episode is The Jedi, with Ahsoka and her Thrawn teaser. Maybe your favorite episode is the finale of season 1, with IG-11′s sacrifice. All valid choices! But my favorite episode is S2E15: The Believer, and I’ll tell you why.

From the very first episode, Din’s relationship with being Mandalorian and the Code is framed as religious. He kneels in front of the forge while the Armorer makes his pauldron, he speaks formally to her, and lays the beskar and the payment for his last bounty out like an offering. 

It’s also not difficult to see parallels between covering your face and some real-life religious tenets (though these are imperfect parallels and be careful how you use them). As someone who follows a specific dress code due to my faith, I definitely immediately related to Din as a religious person.

Din’s devotion to his faith is, for the most part, positively framed in the show. The Creed’s emphasis on protecting and raising foundlings is a large part of why Din decides to rescue Grogu from the Imperials. In the prisonbreak episode, Xi’an suggests that it might be his Code that has made Din soft. In S1E4, Omera is tremendously respectful of Din’s faith even when it means he has to turn down her affection.

 His devotion to the Creed is what sets him apart from other bounty hunters. Sure, he’s a brutal, harsh man more than capable of violence, but he also has a strict code of conduct by which he lives his life.

Then we reach Chapter 6,  an episode that felt painfully familiar to myself and many other people of faith, I’m sure. The way Mayfeld asks Xi’an if Din ever takes his helmet off, as if Din isn’t right there in front of him. The way Xi’an mockingly parrots, “This is the Way.”

My situation obviously isn’t exactly the same as Din’s, but these scenes remind me of the prying questions, the teasing pressure to break my religious commitments, the mocking of beliefs I hold sacred. It really hit home.

Then things get complicated in season 2 when we find out that other Mandalorians consider Din and the Death Watch a cult.

I appreciated this in the sense that it demonstrates the wide variety of beliefs even within the same religion--but at the same time it had me worried. Was this going to be yet another “losing my religion” story? Was this going to be a tale of disillusionment and breaking free of Din’s restrictive past? I’ve seen a lot of stories like that before, and I was hoping to see something different.

Even before Din meets Bo-Katan, we see him gradually softening his adherence to the Code. He starts off meeting Cobb Vanth by challenging him to essentially a battle to the death for wearing Mandalorian armor, then cooperates for the rest of the episode with him to defeat the Crate Dragon. They part ways as friends.

In S2E6, Din is upset when Boba first demands the Mandalorian armor, but he’s not very difficult to convince to accept Boba as the owner of the armor after they fight together.

As a viewer who loves baby Yoda, we’re happy to see him make exceptions to keep Grogu safe. But as a person of faith, I was a little worried about where this might be headed and how it might undermine what I saw as a very positive message in season one. Then we get to Season 2, Episode 7: The Believer.

Right off the bat, Din sees himself forced to stretch the limits of his adherence to the Code in this episode. He goes with Mayfeld into the Imperial facility, covering his face with the helmet of an Imperial driver. Mayfeld immediately picks up on the inconsistency.

He picks right back up with the mockery and not-so-subtle digs.

Then we get a bit of a peak into where Mayfeld’s derision is really coming from. Yes, Mayfeld is speaking aloud the insecurities that Din is facing himself--the doubts about whether it actually means anything to live by his Code, the question of if his chosen way of life actually makes any difference. But Mayfeld is also revealing the source of his own derision as well.

See how the focus switches to Mayfeld? How his voice gets soft and he’s looking off into the distance? This is a man who is talking to himself. This is a man who’s trying to convince himself that every bad thing he’s done in his past is fine because everyone is equally guilty.

When faced with the terminal that requires a facial scan, Mayfeld actually tries to protect Din in his own small way by not even asking him to scan his face.

Mayfeld then hesitates to help Din when Din’s having a hard time with the terminal. He peeks in on Din, and you get the sense that he’s actually hesitant to disrespect Din’s code by looking at his face. Of course, when Din is confronted by the Imperial officer, Mayfeld steps in to help.

Then they talk with the Imperial officer who actually believes what Mayfeld acted like he believed before. That they’re all the same. That all moral codes--or lack thereof--are equally flawed and that therefore nothing matters. This is when we see the guilt that Mayfeld has been trying to hide all this time--the guilt that Din and his strict Code constantly remind him of.

This is the moment that has been haunting Mayfeld--one of perhaps many atrocities that weigh heavy on his soul. And as a viewer you can see how differently this event sit on his heart versus how it sits on the officer’s heart.

This is very reminiscent of what Mayfeld said earlier in the episode, but we can see that this officer genuinely believes it, while Mayfeld does not.

And this is where Mayfeld reaches his breaking point, where he can’t keep pretending that he doesn’t care or that everyone is equally bad.

And this is when Mayfeld turns from critic into ally and protector. He respects Din’s integrity, he understands that being imperfect doesn’t mean it’s not worth it. And this is what I was so happy to see. I was afraid that as soon as Din took his helmet off, the story would suggest that he’d finally seen the light and broken free of his restrictive Code. And yes, Din is likely going to be more liberal with his adherence to the Code in the future. We see this when he takes his helmet off in the next episode to say goodbye to Grogu. But he isn’t throwing it away.

So what’s the message of The Believer? To me it’s that faith is messy. Faith often involves evolution. In fact, faith generally requires evolution. But just because you mess up, just because you’re a hypocrite, just because you can’t always live up to your ideals, doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t have them.

And we can separate this from faith, too, if you want. Think about what’s right and wrong, examine the way you live your life, develop a moral code. It won’t necessarily be perfect, and you won’t always live by it, but at least you’ll have something. It’s always better to try than to give up.

And in Mayfeld’s immortal words:

[aster-aspera]

for writing: do what i do (:

just get really emotional and project onto characters. but like. in a fluffy way.

this is my way of telling you to make characters cuddle and love eachother.

maybe anxceit for projection reasons? (although if you take this idea i may overanalyse what you write for virgil...)

Oops, this one got a bit personal, but you did give me permission to project :)

Warnings: Bit of an existential crisis ig? idk tell me if it needs any other warnings

Pairing: (queerplatonic) anxceit

Janus was lying on the floor, watching the rain drip down from steely grey skies as the occasional gust of wind blew through the open window, shuffling the papers on his desk around. It picked up something he had been reading, pressing it against his door before letting it fall to the floor. Janus shivered slightly as the chill ghosted along his arms, caressing him like a lover, like a ghost.

Somewhere outside, the sun emerged from behind the clouds and the sky brightened just slightly, casting the grey world in golden light. The patch of sunlight let in by his window didn’t quite reach him, stopping just at his feet. Something in his chest stirred, tempting him to move and curl up in the light, letting the warmth fill the emptiness in his bones. The flame was snuffed out by the grey stillness in the rest of his body and he continued staring at the raindrops hitting his window, wishing they would wash him away too.

He imagined it, dissolving into the rain, being washed down into the soil and trickling between the rock layers, to eventually end up in a great ocean somewhere, a small drop amongst millions, insignificant in the vastness.

Maybe he needed to get up, do something else than have an existential crisis over rain. Or maybe he could stay here and hope that if he wished it enough, the world would disappear, leaving just him, alone in his room with only the rain for company.

His phone buzzed where it was laying on the ground beside him, jolting him out of his existential crisis. His phone overflowed with messages. People from classes pestering him about work, family asking him why he wasn’t talking to them anymore, friends worried about the fact that he hadn’t replied in days. He cast his hand about clumsily and grabbed his phone, turning off the sound.

He had no idea how long he stayed there, staring up at the heavens and rubbing his fingers along his stinging wrist. It was long enough for the sky to turn dark, the occasional star winking out from behind the clouds. It was long enough for the streetlight to switch on, the orange light illuminating the mist wreathing the streets.

There was a quiet, timid knock on his door and Janus looked up apathetically, brain trying to come up with a way to deal with the fact there was someone in front of his door.

“Janus?” Virgil’s gentle voice called, “I ordered dinner, you coming down?”

Janus felt something wet trace down his cheeks and he furrowed his brow in frustration. He didn’t want Virgil to see him like this. But his body stayed heavy and uncooperative on the floor.

“Janus, love, can I come in please?”

Everything in Janus screamed at him to say yes, to show all his broken, crumbling pieces to Virgil. He wanted someone to hold him, to tell him it would be alright. To tell him the lies in his head were just that.

And the other part, the sensible part, told him to wipe away the tears, to tell Virgil he was perfectly fine. It was selfish, to need Virgil to comfort him. To take his comfort when he could barely offer the same in return.

It seemed he took too long to reply, because Virgil pushed the door open, worry clearly written on his face. His eyes immediately locked onto Janus and the worry softened into concern. He kneeled down next to Janus, took his wrist in his hand and rubbed gentle circles into his skin.

“Bad day?” he asked. Janus just nodded.

“How about you go lie down in bed? This doesn’t look comfortable,” Virgil suggested. Jnaus tugged his hand closer, till Virgil nearly toppled over on top of him. He looked up at him imploringly. “Hugs,” he mumbled.

Virgil sighed, lying down next to Janus so he wouldn’t fall onto him. He wrapped an arm around his waist and pulled him against his chest, pressing a soft kiss to Janus’s hair. “So needy,” he murmured and there was no reproach to his voice, just that familiar fondness. Janus felt something warm stir happily in his chest.

His body finally gave in and cooperated as he turned to bury his face in Virgil’s chest, hands gripping his hoodie tightly, almost desperately.

“This would probably be more comfy in bed,” Virgil chuckled. Janus whined plaintively. “Don’t want to move,” he groaned.

“You’re going to have to get up at some point.”

“No,” Janus said decidedly, “I’m just staying here forever. And you’re staying here with me.”

“As much as I would love to, we do have to eat.”

Janus gave him his most serious look. “No.” he said again, trying to hide his fond smile.

“How ‘bout this?” Virgil said, pressing another kiss to his hair, “You go lie down in bed, and I’ll bring up some food, and then once you’ve eaten we can cuddle for as long as you like.”

“Or,” Janus argued, “We could stay here and cuddle.”

“You,” Vigil said, leaning up on his elbow and flicking Janus’s nose lightly, “are absolutely impossible.”

Janus smiled up at him, realizing the sadness that curled up in his bones like a heavy fog had lifted slightly, the bright rays of sunshine that accompanied Virgil breaking through the grey.

“I love you,” Janus said, sudden and soft.

Virgil looked at him with surprise at the words. Then his face softened into the most beautiful smile and Janus wanted nothing more than to hold that smile in his heart, as a memory of the sunlight that chased away the clouds. He brushed the corners of Virgil’s lips with a soft finger.

“I love you too,” Virgil whispered, voice filled with so much love and warmth Janus felt like he was choking on it.

Janus pushed himself up off the ground too, groaning when his back protested. “Maybe the bed would be more comfortable.”

Virgil’s triumphant smirk almost made Janus reconsider the love thing. But then Virgil stood up with him and wrapped his arm around his waist, bumping their hips together playfully and he felt just as besotted as a few moments ago.

Janus sat down in bed and pouted at Virgil as he kissed his forehead, promising he would be back with food in less than a minute.

As soon as Virgil left the room, the grey settled back in and Janus dug his nails into his wrist, the sharp pain helping to drive away the fog. He closed his eyes, sinking into the pillows and straining to hear Virgil in the next room, clattering around in the kitchen.

Virgil reappeared in the doorway, balancing a tray filled with take out containers and two glasses of water, a heat pad tucked under his elbow. He sat down on the bed, placing the tray on the side table and giving it a stern look, as if that would stop it from toppling off the ridiculously small table. He handed the heat pad to Janus.

“Here, your back can’t feel too good after lying on the ground for so long.”

Janus scowled at him but accepted the heat pad, tucking it behind his back and melting into the warmth as it loosened his tense muscles.

Virgil sat as close as he could as they ate, their legs tangled together, their sides pressed into each other. Janus occasionally got an elbow in his gut but it was something he could bear for the sake of getting to sit so close to Virgil.

Once Virgil had put away their empty dishes, Janus took no time pulling him into a hug. He had waited far too long for the cuddles he had been promised. He crawled as close to Virgil as he could get, pressing his face into his chest and basing in the glorious warmth that chased away the cold chill of the rainy day.

Virgil pressed a kiss to the top of his head, and then another to his neck and cheeks. He slid down a bit, settling into the pillows more comfortably and adjusting Janus so his head was resting at his collarbone, his arms circling around his waist.

A warm weight snuggled against Janus’s neck, settling down on Virgil’s chest and Janus looked up with a smile as their cat started purring happily. Virgil scratched her ears gently.

“Next time you’re having a bad day, you know you can always just tell me, right?” Virgil whispered and Janus nodded. “I know,” He whispered as he closed his eyes, every sharp edge softening, melting into a puddle of warmth and contentement.

Janus woke up first the next morning, as he nearly always did, curling up contentedly in the mellow light of the morning, letting sleep soften the morning as he stared at Virgil, lit by the golden rays filtering through the windows they hadn’t bothered to close, hair sticking up in a million different directions, face relaxed and unguarded. The warmth of Virgil curled around him, the quiet of the city this early in the morning, it all threatened to drag Janus back into sleep. He probably would have given into it, if his stomach didn’t take that exact moment to start complaining.

He sighed softly, figuring he might as well take advantage of the situation to do something for Virgil. He carefully peeled Virgil’s arms from where they were tightly wrapped around him, shushing him with a soft kiss when he muttered something in his sleep.

He padded into the kitchen on bare feet, their cat appearing from somewhere and winding between his legs. He bent down to scratch her along her back, smiling as her tail curled around his arm.

He hummed softly under his breath as he searched through the cabinets for the ingredients needed for crepes, mixing the batter from memory, the movements ingrained in his memory. He put on some quiet music as he waited for them to bake, swaying along to the music, his eyes closed and his body relaxed.

Arms wrapped around his waist suddenly, startling him out of his reverie and he smiled as a kiss was placed at the base of his neck, Virgil’s gentle voice rumbling in his ear. “Good morning love,” he said, voice still rough and heavy from sleep.

“Good morning buttercup, I trust you slept well?”

“Mhmm, perfectly, definitely with you there.”

Janus turned to press a kiss to his cheek before going to flip the crepes onto a plate.

“And what did I do to earn this fancy breakfast?” Virgil asked, leaning back against the counter with a cup of coffee in his hands.

“Can’t I just want to make my boyfriend some crepes?” JAnus said lightly, stacking them on the plate and setting them on the table. “I was mostly just in the mood to bake something, but making you happy is always a plus.”

“You’re so sappy,” Virgil chuckled as he sat down on the floor to pull the cat into his lap. Janus smiled at him as he smothered the cat in affection. “And you say I’m the sappy one.”

Virgil looked up at him, brow furrowed in adorable confusion. “What?”

The cat made a noise of protest and he returned his attention to her. Janus rolled his eyes and finished setting the table. “Once you’re done there, how about you come eat those crepes I so painstakingly made for you?”

Setting the table ended up being redundant, as they curled up on the couch to eat, the cat sandwiched between them and some cartoon Janus wasn’t paying attention to playing on the tv, talking quietly about all sorts of things.

[xoxo-ren-xoxo]

Rating the Films I've Seen This Term in University In a Completely Arbitrary and Subjective Fashion

Because I'm getting a degree in Film Studies. This is also a recommendations list go watch all the 8/10 or above ones. Also I'm separating these by which module of my uni course I watched them for, with recreational viewings at the end.

Film History:

The Immigrant (Chaplin) 8/10 the funniest and most down to earth Chaplin film I saw this term

Easy Street (Chaplin) 7/10 again very funny but didn't have as much to say imo

City Lights (Chaplin) 6/10 too long I'm sorry I got bored. Also not as funny to me

Strike (Eisenstein) 7/10 communism :)

Battleship Potemkin (Eisenstein) 8/10 communism plus the staircase scene very iconic

M (Lang) 4/10 you could literally skip the middle and you wouldn't miss anything

The Cabinet of Dr Caligari (Wiene) 6/10 not my thing but if you like weirdo German horror shit then it'll be your thing. Nice stylisation

Grand Hotel (Goulding) 7/10 if you like old Hollywood glamour you'll like this. Lots of good supporting cast. Entertaining

Bicycle Thieves (De Sica) 8/10 fun and sad but not too sad, a lot of class commentary

Rome Open City (Rossellini) 7/10 based on true stories much much sadder still good tho

Contempt (Godard) 6/10 kinda boring, there's like four characters and barely two storylines, but interesting contextually

Day for Night (Truffaut) 7/10 more entertaining, tragic, big supporting cast, lots of storylines, interesting!

Young Mr Lincoln (Ford) 7/10 honestly better than I thought it'd be ngl

Game Change (Roach) 4/10 I don't care about Sarah Palin

Lagaan (Gowariker) 10/10 the 70 minute cricket match was so fucking worth it and ily if you have seen this. I have all of the songs stuck in my head

The Official Story (Puenzo) 5/10 I get it but also eh

Rojo (Naishtat) 6/10 history

Visual Cultures:

Persepolis (Satrapi) 8/10 brilliant animated work and beautifully adapted from the original graphic novel

American Splendor (Berman and Pulcini) 10/10 made me cry, is very hard to watch in some places, definitely doesn't shy away from difficult topics, again brilliantly adapted from the comics

Spiderman: Into The Spiderverse (Persichetti) 10/10 do I even need to tell you this

Scott Pilgrim Vs The World (Wright) 9/10 Edgar Wright can't write women but he can write a damn good film, go watch it if you haven't but you're on Tumblr so...

Theories for Film Studies:

Rear Window (Hitchcock) 8/10 love a story set in one room

American Psycho (Harron) 7/10 hey did you know that rich people can do crime and get away with it. Or maybe they can't.

Falling Down (Schumacher) 8/10 Joker before Joker. Unfortunately one of those films like Joker and Fight Club where certain men watch it and miss the point completely

King Kong (Cooper and Schoedsack) 1/10 it gets one point for the dinosaurs being cool

Bad Boy Bubby (de Heer) 2/10 I get it and yes it's a decent film but no you didn't have to do any of this actually

Bhaji on the Beach (Chadha) 8/10 girlboss

Paris is Burning (Livingston) 8/10 a good introduction to ballroom culture, there is however a lot of discourse surrounding the director and what her intentions were with making the film so keep that context in mind ig

Bamako (Sissako) 6/10 you need to know a bit of contextual stuff before watching and it's pretty boring but I guess it's kinda moving too

As Good As It Gets (Brooks) 9/10 every kind of prejudice is in this film, still slaps pretty hard tho

The Piano (Campion) 6/10 woman has piano and plays it. yeah

Film Analysis:

Rebel Without a Cause (Ray) 6/10 I had to write an essay on this so it's kinda dead to me but it was alright. Amazing cinematography.

Touch of Evil (Welles) 5/10 sorry Welles this kinda sucked ngl

The Shop Around The Corner (Lubitsch) 9/10 very fun very cute again it's the ensemble cast which did it for me I love them yes yes

Blow Out (de Palma) 9/10 absolute banger film tbh very interesting and made me feel emotions

La Mala Education (Almodóvar) 6/10 kinda cool kinda confusing I get what they were going for. Also the guy from Y Tu Mama Tambien is in this which is cool I love that film...

Recreational Viewings:

The French Dispatch (Anderson) 10/10 fuck yeah I even wrote an editorial piece about it. Beautiful and amazing

Passing (Hall) 5/10 it didn't make me feel the emotions I think it wanted me to feel. It felt quite empty but not in an existential way? I understand the importance of it and the Point of the film but it just didn't resonate

Seven Samurai (Kurosawa) 10/10 I understand why people call this the best foreign language film ever. It was insanely long (3 and a half hours) but I loved every second. A masterpiece.

[chrisjake-cp]

History 3 Trapped Filming Diary (full English translation) - Days 1-10

Just before you start reading, a little note of explanation: the author of this diary will frequently use the character’s name when they mean the actor. I have added the names of the actors between square brackets sometimes to avoid confusion. Also between square brackets you will find some words that are implied, so I added them in the translation to make the translation a bit smoother, but they aren’t included in the Chinese text. 

The book’s author will also talk in the first person POV sometimes, refering to themselves as either “I”, “we” or “this little editor 小编”.  So each time you see me write “I”, it is not my own opinion I’m inserting in the text, but the author/editor’s. If I have anything else to add or explain myself, I’ll add it in a note at the end of the text.  

I’ll repeat: I don’t own the book so I can’t post my scans of the pictures that came with every day. So I posted some other pictures of the scenes that were being filmed with each day. These pics belong to LINE TV or Choco Media, or I’ve taken screenshots. 

Day 1-10 under the cut. 

Day 1

The first day of shooting happened to coincide with ‘Li Dong’⁕ but the temperatures of that day soared to 29 degrees. The crew was going sleeveless, but the actors were all wearing sweaters or dress shirts. Tang Yi, who had on the most, was wearing a turtleneck sweater and a suit jacket on top at one point, but he didn’t sweat very much.⁕ Meanwhile A De [Stanley], wearing a shirt and a suit jacket, was [clad] the ‘thinnest’ at the scene. When he got off work and took off his sweaty shirt, the wardrobe department exclaimed: “This shirt is so wet!”

Officer Meng’s scenes for that day consisted of eating from 10 am in the morning until 6pm in the evening. He basically ate from when he got to work until he got off work. All in all he had two large bags of rice and poured 4 liters of coca cola. Junhao [Jake] will start sweating profusely and start flushing when he eats spicy food, so as soon as the director yelled ‘cut’, the crew would immediately pass him a plastic bag so he could spit out the spicy Kung Pao Chicken he was eating.

⁕ Li Dong 立冬 literally means ‘establishing the winter’, so it is some kind of winter solstice in Asian culture. In the Gregorian calendar, it falls on 7 or 8 November. According to the IG stories of some of the cast of Trapped, it was indeed 7 November 2018 when shooting started. 

⁕ Chris apparently doesn’t sweat much, no matter how hot he gets. He says as much in his vlog as well. I envy him, because I’d just be sweating buckets like Stanley. 

Day 2

The first meeting between Tang Yi and Wenhao is also the second time that Chengyang [Chris] and teacher Jiakui [Chen Jiakui, the actor who plays Chen Wenhao] worked together. They cooperated for the first time on a movie. At that time teacher Jiakui served as the movie’s drama teacher. When Chris had gone through make-up in the early morning, he sat alone in a corner with the script. You could easily see that he was conflicted and upset. [For the other movie] teacher Jiakui was Chris’ mentor, but here Wenhao was the target of Tang Yi’s revenge.

In the process of their scenes where they faced each other, the director hoped that Tang Yi could hate Wenhao even more, but Tang Yi’s personality is subdued and calm. So how could he fly into a raging fit and still keep his calm? In a part that was not captured on camera, teacher Jiakui aggravated some lines to make Chris more infuriated. Afterwards teacher Jiakui also said that the role of Tang Yi is not easy to perform. [Tang Yi] is a young mob boss, The hate in his eyes must therefore also carry a bit of youthfullness, which is difficult to experience for normal people in the course of their lives.

Day 3

Today was the first time that Zhaozi arrived on set, and while he was bored waiting for his scenes, Zhaozi started to act as the shop’s clerk to sell suits. Apart from suits, bowties and regular ties, he even managed to sell shoehorns. By oneself, the words just kept on flying out of his mouth which left Shaofei beside him looking dumbfounded (if you want to see Shaofei’s dumbfounded meme-like look, you have to absolutely watch the behind-the-scenes on the DVDs)⁕. [Shaofei] continued to shout “If you buy a shoehorn you get Zhaozi for free with it, please someone take Zhaozi away, Unit 3 can’t stand it anymore.”

Boss Tang was tired, and took a nap in his own shop. ‘Just a little while will do. Shaofei and A De, you two be on the lookout for me, and if the director is coming, remember to wake me.’

⁕ Excellent advice. Please do watch the behind-the-scenes after finishing this book, because a lot of what is written here is visualized in the bts. The bts are arranged per episode though, and not per filming day, but it’s still amazing to be able to see what went on. 

Day 4

The set for the offices of Investigation Unit 3 is actually the office of LINE TV’s Choco Media branch. The contemporary industrial style caused the atmosphere among Unit 3 to be even more lively. 

For Unit 3’s first scene together, the director used a one-shot to have everyone appear on the scene, which meant that the first time all the actors were present, they had to have a ‘chemistry’ test. But apart from the actors, chemistry also had to be there for the whole staff, as the directing crew, the camera crew and the sound crew, really everyone, also had to follow [the actors] along⁕. I still remember that by the 20th take, everyone’s lines ran very smoothly, the shot was satisfactory and everyone was where they were supposed to be. The director and the crew were holding their breath in concentration, and just when they thought they’d succeed, A Zhi [character Zhou Guanzhi, played by Kass Tsai] forgot a line in the very last sentence hahahaha. In the end, this round took 27 takes.

⁕ The author uses a metaphor/reference here. They write 乾坤大挪移 which means something like ‘The Great Shift of the Cosmos’ and is apparently a kind of martial art from a martial arts novel. It consists of 7 increasingly difficult skill levels, whereby the 7th level is almost unattainable. In other words, shooting this one-shot scene required the whole cast and crew pulling off this great cosmos shift, and thus was a big, big challenge. 

Day 5

After we shot the scene where the two idiots from Unit 3 [Shaofei and Zhaozi] got into trouble and received an explosive scolding by Dapao [Shi Dapao, the name of Unit 3’s Captain]⁕, the director told Shaofei that she wanted to add a scene where he sat next to the window thinking about Sister Lizhen, continuing in the same mood [as the previous scene]...Everyone in Unit 3 felt that Shaofei was continuing to set his teeth into a meaningless old case. If there had only been some progress in the investigation...but [Shaofei] not only didn’t find any new leads, but he also got into trouble everywhere. If Sister Lizhen would still be alive, he wouldn’t be like this now...Shaofei really, really missed sister Lizhen. Rather than say that the director added this scene at the last moment, it’s more like she deliberately didn’t tell Junhao [Jake] that she would add this part. 

When they were shooting, the director played the music from the music box through the megaphone and from time to time talked as well, to provoke moody feelings in Jake. In the end Jake grabbed his phone and scrolled through his mother’s Facebook, and to all our surprise Jake started bawling, so much so that even after the ‘cut’ he couldn’t stop, until the director walked over and lightly patted him on the back. To be able to cry like that in a short amount of time, even he himself hadn’t expected that.

⁕ How much fun is it that the name of the Captain of Unit 3 literally means big cannon, when he explodes in anger all the damn time? 😂 I am quite convinced that in the hospital scene where Shaofei tells Tang Yi of his fortune-telling and that only a cannon can strike him down - he uses the exact same wording ‘dapao’ - it’s actually an inside joke and he may not have meant ‘cannon’ literally. 

Day 6

Today’s weather couldn’t be called very fine, and when we were shooting until 3 or 4 P.M., the daylight was almost gone, just when the filming location had large windows in every corner that reached the ground. Our funny director said “Why did the production team run out of light after 3 P.M.? Did they forget to send notice⁕ to the sun?” This caused the crew that was present to not know whether to laugh or cry. But in the end, before the sun got off work, everyone else smoothly finished their job as well.

⁕ the term “to send notice” is quite literal, but the word is indeed an entertainment industry term as well, that means to hire someone for a short amount of time or for a specific show, without there having to be a longer-term contractual agreement. So it could also be translated as “did they forget to hire the sun [to star in today’s scenes]?”

Day 7

It was a day with complicated feelings for Shaofei and little Tang Yi, as Shaofei discovered Tang Yi’s past history. 

Before going to meet the adoptive father of his lover, of course Shaofei had to straighten himself out first and shave his beard to leave a good impression. In the evening, today’s final scene was shot. Before starting filming, the director hoped that [Tang Yi’s] adoptive father could guide little Tang Yi’s mood, because the intensity of this scene needed to bring out the reason why Tang Yi’s feelings for Tang Guodong ran so deep and make everyone feel the warmth that Tang Guodong brought to Tang Yi even more. 

Under the constant conflict of raising [little Tang Yi] through much difficulties, a loud and clear slap came down heavily on little Tang Yi’s face. The silence at the [shooting] site caused the loud sound to be infinitely amplified, and the director and the crew were all shocked. When the ‘cut’ sounded, little Tang Yi instantly started crying, and the director rushed to the room immediately. On every crew member’s face was reluctance and shock. Meanwhile the adoptive father sat with his head down on the sofa, full of remorse. 

An extra tidbit from the same scene: the crew’s love for little gadgets

There are always a few conspicuous toys in front of the director’s monitor. She explained that these were toys that members of the crew who are close to her gave her to alleviate stress. I don’t know which toy is the director’s favourite?

 Day 8

For the setting of the toilets of Unit 3 we actually used the toilets in a department store. Zhaozi, who arrived at the store very early in the morning, was hit on by an older lady who was just coming into work. The lady said: “Aren’t you Zhao Youting [Mark Chao]? You definitely are Zhao Youting!!” Even though Zhaozi went on to deny it, the lady didn’t listen and believed that this handsome guy in front of her was Zhao Youting himself. 

Actually, Zhaozi passed on the above story [to us], and no one actually saw this older lady. Zhaozi often tells bluff stories with a straight face, but I [this little editor] have my reservations about its credibility. But be as it may, after he was told that he looked like Zhao Youting, Zhaozi’s acting skills immediately leveled up. So okay, whether or not the story was real, we thank this lady ‘from the legends’.

Day 9

Can I call you dad after this hug? 

I still remember the story of a friend coming out to his mother. He said to his mom: “I’m sorry if this thing disappoints you. I don’t dare to ask for your blessing. I just hope that you can show some understanding.” Through a chat message, his mother could only briefly reply: “If your other half is a good kid, I will give you my blessing.”

Many people in a same-sex relationship don’t dare to confess to the older generation and they don’t dare to ask for their blessings. Their only hope is not to be hated. It’s like that facing this society, and it’s the case when facing your beloved family. When Wenhao and Shaofei met each other, Wenhao gave Shaofei a hug. This hug must have carried [Wenhao’s] unspoken blessing. 

No worries, dear father-in-law. I, Officer Meng, will take care of everything (pats on the back). 

Wenhao and Guodong together brings its own hint of romance.⁕ The fighting was very intense that day, so much so that the police dispatched a Quick Fight Force team in concern [for the situation]. 

⁕ The term that the author uses is 腐味 (fuwei, the taste of fu). The first character, ‘fu’ is the same ‘fu’ that is used in terms like fujoshi 腐女子 and fudanshi  腐男子 (which are Japanese) but it’s the same pronunciation for that first character. So the author implies that there might have been something more than friendship going on between Chen Wenhao and Tang Guodong. They imply the same thing later in the book as well (day 60, where the two are called a CP). 

Day 10

A Mei [Stanley] who portrays A De, said that he was the expert in getting beaten [in this drama]. I say that Stanley definitely dedicated himself to taking on that role. Many times his head bumped into the wall and the crew told him to take a break, but Stanley couldn’t stop yelling “no no, hurry up, I’m familiar with it now!”

All the way through the end Officer Meng and Vixen⁕ no.1, A De, cheered each other on before ‘Action!’ [was called]. 

⁕ The word for vixen is ‘fox spirit’  狐狸精 in Chinese. I love that and I could probably write essays on this subject. In classical Chinese literature, foxes were most of the time portrayed as (mainly female) temptresses who seduced males for sex and then didn’t shy away from sucking the soul out of them, kind of like a succubus. If anyone is ever in the mood for some academic literature about foxes in late imperial China, I've got you covered  https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/3237790-alien-kind

So A De and Andy are constantly referred to as these foxes who want to seduce Tang Yi and snatch him away in front of Shaofei’s eyes. 

[twinferns]

loki ep 1 exhaustive recaps bc why not

im just gonna cut to the chase bc im so excited

***SPOILERS BELOW THIS LINE***

- it kinda hurt seeing the og avengers together at the beginning

- anyone else see the ironman parallels with loki's crash landing in the desert?? it makes me think that this case will follow the kinda of character development that tony had and i'm excited

- the tva just rolls up and fucking vibe checks loki so hard he starts moving in slow motion

- they just treated the tesseract so casually?? hello??

- the little machine that took loki's clothes was super cute

- MARVEL NEW WHAT THEY WERE DOING WITH THAT LOKI NAKED SCENE

- you're telling me that loki has only said that much?? i feel like there should be more paper

- loki would have an existential crisis checking off the "i am not a robot" thingy

- miss minute is kinda terrifying tbh but tara strong voices her so that's groovy

- this whole timeline thing is so confusing bc didnt steve go to a different timeline to be with peggy bc it didnt effect the normal timeline, but now there's one sacred timeline??

- wanda's a nexus being so uhh we'll see how that plays out

- ngl i thought the little girl was joan of arc at first lmao

- if i see a single mephisto theory i'm gonna loose it

- wooooow it's owen wilson!! - i love him but loki is such a hardass, affectionately ofc

- nightmare reference?? like the villain in multiverse of madness?

- but highkey the tva is super cool

- loki is a believer in lizard people pass it on

- the fact that loki is db cooper and the only reason he did that is bc he lost a bet to thor is absolutely brilliant someone needs to tell shane and ryan

- im watching the db cooper ep of unsolved as i write this

- oh so he's getting tough love therapy?? i mean go off ig

- CASEY SUPREMACY I LOVE HIM

- they're using the stones as fucking paper weights? nat died for that, and they're just sitting around in a drawer? what the fuck

- was that?? peggy carter?? in the background getting taken in??

- the scene where he rewatched everything by himself gutted me like a fish. everyone was so upset that this was pre development loki and he wouldnt like thor, but he's always loved thor. and watching him watch freya die?? ouch dude. he's just a kid (like developmentally) and to be told he can never grow and he can only be a villain to further the growth of others? that's soul crushing i cant imagine how that would be

- loki's really just having the time of his life blipping that lady in an out of the room. what a mischievous scamp <33

- my first thought was "is that agatha??" then realized that's the wrong series lmao

- my theory? it's lady loki, it has to be

i literally can't wait until next week, see you then!!

[daesungindistress]

The five hands pic was posted alongside a pic of his screen, noting the time on New Year’s. Maybe he was trying to mark a new beginning since it is a new year. But then, he's always been difficult to read.

Mark a new beginning by bringing back something old? You might be onto something ;) I’ll explain below.

Alright y’all, I’m back, and with a new take on his post. One that, though I had a half-formed idea about it the day he posted, New Year’s Eve my timezone, I didn’t have the peace of mind or mental clarity to make sense of it at the time, there in the thick of so much unexpected emotion, yours and mine.

While I’m undecided about how much stock I want to place in this, preferring to take a guarded approach to Jiyong and his characteristically cryptic Instagram posts from now on, I think it's worth considering. The few fans I’ve shared it with privately have agreed that it “sounds a lot like Ji.” Disclaimer: this is not an excuse for the disturbance he caused or the pain he inflicted, whether he meant to or not, whether he’s out of touch with fans or just doesn’t care. Think of this more as a genuine, good faith effort to understand what could be going through his head. Because, no, putting aside my initial impression heavily colored by the years (literally years!) of negative experiences here, I can’t agree with the shit stains of this fandom and their misplaced gloating. Jiyong did not “say BIGBANG is 5.” But he did say something. And I think his message without words deserves a closer look.

So here we go:

Quite a few VIPs are taking his post as a comeback teaser for a GD solo followed by BIGBANG. And while that may be the case, I wouldn’t be surprised if it... are you ready for it... had little to with G-Dragon or BIGBANG at all. Those two images side-by-side may have been a generic call for unity and cooperation for the world at large as we leave behind a year defined by distance and division.

First of all, it was his first post of 2021. The time stamp on his screen read 1:11 1/1/2021... really driving home the number 1. Unity, obviously.

In the background the painting Millionaire Nurse by Richard Prince is projected over him. He is wearing what appears to be a surgical mask, an instantly recognizable symbol of the sickness that dominated the year 2020, and a piece of protective equipment we carry with us into 2021 because, with cases still surging and restrictions tightening, the fight isn’t over. What’s more, of all the pics in this photoshoot, I noticed he chose one in which the word NURSE is highly visible in bright lettering across the front of his mask. A much-needed message of hope and healing for a world driven into quarantine by COVID-19. He hopes 2021 will be the year we’ll finally conquer this contagion that keeps us apart.

Still with me? Here’s where things get interesting:

In a recent interview promoting his Nike Paranoise 2.0 shoes Jiyong was asked about his one wish for 2021. “What is the 2021 'YOUTOPIA' you are hoping for?”

“I hope the world becomes healthier,” Jiyong answered. “I think that’s what everyone wants right now.”

Health and healing for the world. No mention of music, solo or otherwise. His mind is on the state of the world, not the state of BIGBANG. And he assumes everyone is on the same page.

But wait! There’s more:

That photo of interconnected hands was first posted to his IG back in 2016 but resurfaced recently in October 2020 when someone (presumably one of his or TOP's art friends, I’m not sure who this guy is) reposted it as a visual accompaniment to a rambling criticism of a country more fractured than ever before by politics and policy as its people grapple with this novel coronavirus. Jiyong came across it with his personal account and slapped a heart on it, liking it very much.

Thinking about it, trying to get a sense of where his mind may have been back then, this was roughly around the time his Paranoise shoes were being prepped for release, about which he explained, “Our footsteps are the result of our decisions. I believe you can completely change the meaning behind these sneakers depending on how you wear them.”

“Change the meaning,” he says. That isn’t limited to footwear, you know; depending on how it’s presented, it is also possible to change the meaning behind a photo. And that may be what Jiyong has just done. It's not about BIGBANG anymore, it's about something bigger than BIGBANG.

That IG post by Matt Carey Williams may well have been the first time Jiyong viewed that iconic photo from his past in a new light, through someone else's eyes, being applied broadly to something outside of BIGBANG. Perhaps he saved it and has been holding onto it in the months since, waiting for the right time to use it to make a similar statement of his own about the godawful year we’ve just left in the rearview mirror. One that will be remembered by (to name just a few) rigorous hand washing, religious mask wearing, and to the detriment of mental health worldwide (in an effort to preserve physical health)... widespread social distancing.

Like everyone, Jiyong is tired of the distance, done with the divide, fed-up with closed borders and stay-at-home orders. Fatigued by this seemingly endless cycle of self- and state-imposed separation. Family, friends, and fans advised (and in some cases required) to steer clear of each other? So this picture, this bold reminder in black and white of skin-to-skin contact, hands joined with other hands, connecting person to person... that is the return to normalcy Jiyong would like to see in the near future.

In another ask, anon observed, “It's entirely possible [Jiyong] just doesn't think Seungri has a right to infringe on his own memories or sense of ownership of BIGBANG.”

I thought that was insightful. And important to keep in mind going forward. Because unless they plan to ignore everything from their past and run from it forever (an impossible feat), sooner or later Jiyong, Youngbae, Seunghyun, and Daesung will have to take steps to take back BIGBANG. Take back their brand, their music, their art. Their memories together and their past work shouldn’t stay trapped with and tainted by their former member for the rest of their days.

This doesn’t have to be Jiyong signaling a return to the past, or even asking that we remember it; instead, I see it as him reclaiming it. Owning it in ways that are, well, his own, even if that means going about it with ambiguity. Infusing old things with new meaning in a new year ripe with the potential for new beginnings.

[maximumwobblerbanditdonut]

How does his boat change direction?

His career summary is key to getting noticed. But his IG account is all about him as an actor, not as an author.

If his goal is to move away from acting (his profession) and he prefers not to be an actor, he has to be ready to face whatever might come his way. Certainly, one thing is clear, being an actor, it was worth it once he gained a steady audience of 3 million followers, which he will never repeat into his new pretentious persona, believing he is an author ✍️ when he is not. Hiring a ghostwriter to write his book and compile an almanac, there’s no such thing as a writer's idea. It makes him look like a snobby person.

He pretends to be an intellectual, but does not learn or explore texts so that he can maximize his talents and expand his skills (if he has any under the sunlight)

He overlooks the obvious. You never become a dumb buyer when you get rich quick. He considers that having things makes him feel better. Not only that, but he has only renewed his emotional waste.

Intellectuals are people who read, think, learn every day of their lives because they need to; They can’t even conceive of not nourishing their brain as much as their bodies. It involves a lot of critical thinking, reading, research, analysing. He is also certainly very passive in that matter!

The reason he aspired to call himself “bestselling author” is because it increases his credibility and “personal brand.” He pretends to establish as an intellectual. Despite he supposes better get writing…😳😂 He’s able to convince that he not only wrote a book, but that the market has judged it to be better than other books out there (delusions of grandeur) It’s a status symbol, one of that cashes in on the prestige of one of man’s oldest past-times. At last, He had acquired this coveted title for himself.

If he has to do a job that doesn't align with his chosen career path, he’s going to be limited in terms of what he can do as an actor. How he communicates with others, whether if it’s through speech, influences how others perceive and evaluate him as a professional.

His ability to articulate his thoughts and ideas has a direct correlation to how he persuades others 🙄 an honorary doctorate didn’t convince anyone. Giving an academic qualification to him when he hasn't studied and done the course. I think it’s fairly clear. Well, that was ironic. That was making him sound ignorant.

Everybody remembers his university speech 💭 at the University of Stirling 🎓 badly prepared and self-promotion. Sam disrespected graduates and faculty at the Institution. He didn't inspire students or contribution to the university, not a role model.

If he’s still not sure about whether he wants to be an actor anymore or not, here is some clear sign that he’s just dragging his fans along and whatever relationship with his acting career has now is going nowhere. An alert to the Royal Conservatory of Scotland who trusted him and now he must prove that he is worth something.

😕 But, if he wants to act, stopped being obsessed with fame because he is more interested in being famous than practising his craft. He always seems slightly agitated, as if there’s something going on. He really is jumping off a moving train!

“I don’t approve of the John Waynes and the Gary Coopers saying ‘Shucks, I ain’t no actor – I’m just a bridge builder or a gas station attendant.’ If they aren’t actors, what the hell are they getting paid for? I have respect for my profession. I worked hard at it.”

Humphrey Bogart

[mygnolia]

gtkm

get to know me ? 

thanks yin/ @doievoir for the tag! I’m gonna do it on my writing blog just so y’all get to know me better!

what day is your birthday? jan 7 capricorns fucking up ur shit lets go

what’s your favourite colour? honestly i love anything pastel! but im also a kidcore fanatic so maybe bright blue? 

what’s your lucky number? hm, i don’t have one? maybe 8?

do you have any pets? MY LITTLE LOAF BABY!!! i have a bunny named cookie <3

how tall are you? uhm...162-3 cm.... don’t laugh (5′3)

how many pairs of shoes do you own? like. 3. i literally wear the same shoes everyday but i have flip flops and some more sneakers?

favourite song? less of you by keshi or mixtape oh! 

favourite movie? up.....IM GONNA CRY 

what would be your ideal partner? i don’t really have a type? just anyone who’s respectful and matches my energy!

do you want children? fuck no

have you gotten in trouble with the law? nope!

bath or shower? bath but my hands can’t be in them bc they prune too fast

what colour socks are you wearing? none. but i had black socks on earlier

favourite type of music? krnb, krap, kpop!

how many pillows do you sleep with? i sleep with 2 pillows but i have a body pillow (that i don’t use) and this square one thats really fuzzy and i use it to hold when im sad

what position do you sleep in? on my stomach starfish or just holding something on my side

what you don’t like when you’re sleeping? MY NIGHTMARES LORD

what do you have for breakfast? normally skip but yogurt with granola 

have you ever tried archery? d-does game pigeon count

favourite fruit? bananas, pinapple, uh...strawberries maybe

favourite swear word? hm i use insults more often but probably motherfucker or bitch LMFAO 

do you have any scars? i have a few scars from shit that happened but thats it!

are you a good liar? depends. about trivial things? yeah, i can lie abt it easy, but if it’s things that are important i’m not good at keeping my composer rlly

what’s your personality type? infp-t

what’s your favourite type of girl? idk what it means by favorite girl but my irls c and s are my favorite kinds of people?

innie or outie? innie

left or right handed? right handed but i can write in both

favourite food? idk ramen-

favourite foreign food? pho? i like asian food ig

are you clean or messy? messy 

most used phrase? “like??? hello???” “ur good” or “ic ic” 

how long does it take you to get ready? depends for what- if we just going out for food or shopping then probably 10-15 mins, 30 if it’s formal or i need to shower

do you talk to yourself? too often it seems

do you sing to yourself? whether it be 5 pm or 1 am i always sing

are you a good singer? not to toot my own horn but u should join army’s chillin karaoke if u wanna hear LMFAOOOO

biggest fear? being alone or not being loved

are you a gossip? idk if someone tells me something i don’t see any reason to bring it up again and if it’s a rumor i’d debunk immediately

do you like long or short hair? short fs, ive looked better in short than long

favourite school subject? science and english

introvert or extrovert? pretty introverted in new spaces, extroverted when i get more comfortable with my environment

what makes you nervous? DUDE my irls idc idc im scared of all of them 

who was your first real crush? whats a real crush ig- 

how fast can you run? mile time is like 8 minutes dont make fun of me pls

what colour is your hair? black with highlights

what colour are your eyes? brown

what makes you angry? people using non-reclaimable slurs being used like hello?? stfu-

do you like your own name? i unironically go by ren online and in real life so id say yes- 

do you want a boy or a girl as a child? girl but i dont want kids period

what are you strengths? good work ethics and a pretty good leader? work well and can cooperate with others and id like to think im pretty smart!

what are your weaknesses? too stubborn, too fake too often ig- im pretty bad at communicating with my feelings

what’s the colour of your bedspread? white with periwinkle floral ish designs

colour of your room? robin blue!

uh…tagging @jtrbluv @jinkicake @tomotae @maplecornia or anyone else who wants to do this!!