#but yeah very interesting questions!
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after seeing this post by the artist afkeii on instagram, i got inspired to write a poem... and then i drew something to make it into a zine...
the way i feel about romantic love is... complicated... but i've known i'm on the aromantic spectrum for over a year now ! yippiee !
if you'd like to have a physical copy, feel free to [download the print version here] , and check [how to put it together / make a 8-page zine here]
#zine#personal zine#art#aromantic#aromantic spectrum#my art#id in alt text#that was very... interesting to write and draw about#dont ask me how i feel about romantic love its too tiring to explain#(<- thats a lie- do ask me about it as much as you want i have so many thoughts on it. probs more questions than answers tbf tho)#also yeah the black ring on my middle finger and right hand is bcs im asexual too#but ive known im ace since i was 13 so i dont have nothing poetic to say about it cuz its been just a normal thing for me for so long lol#aight its getting late and i need to go sleep byeeee
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[Zac] was just trying to tell me to be happy with the win, and I appreciate that about him. Because I can get lost in, just like everybody can, you get lost in the adversity of the season. You can't take winning for granted and I've tried to get better at that.
#important characterization notes#i do agree that they asked wayyyyyyyy too many questions about the outburst (if you can call it that)#and like....one question about the browns lol#but! i did think this was very interesting#because like. all zac was trying to do was be like 'chill out. we won. be happy!' and joe responding#FUCK THAT IT'S FUCKING EMBARRASSING!!! 😡😡😡#is precious to me#this lil perfectionist. never happy with just winning.#even in a season where those have been exceedingly rare#just like the raiders game! (and i do think it was interesting that he said he can let himself have these outbursts#when they have the game in hand. but they should be blowing out their opponents#like the raiders like the titans. but they aren't. but he feels comfortable anyway.)#verrrrrrry interesting#so calculated even when he seems to be 'losing it'#and then to tie it back to joe'marr. because of course. it's me.#thinking back to that ravens post-game insta live that ja'marr had#of joe apologizing for playing like shit (and not focusing on the fact that they. you know. won the division for 2 years in a row)#and ja'marr assures him he's good and all but doesn't tell him to just be happy#he tells him yeah. you did fuck up on some stuff. but you're good. you're good.#i dunno. ja'marr noted joe handler! versus how zac handled it lol#(also joe emphasizing that he didn't want the yelling all the time in your face coach.)#(let's not forget he dealt with that already with urban lol)#and even in this response saying that he appreciated what zac was doing#ANYWAY just rambling at this point#joe burrow#zac taylor#cincinnati bengals
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"LOVE and FEAR" M/V Teaser
#xdinary heroes#jooyeon#junhan#jun han#gaon#jungsu#ode#gunil#lee jooyeon#han hyeongjun#kwak jiseok#kim jungsu#oh seungmin#goo gunil#forfreddy#oh boi the most difficult part about this gifset was.... picking gifs#should i use them all? should i make separate gifsets??#it also made me realize....#why isn't there a 'twisted' jooyeon shot??#is he the one behind it? causing it?#it feels very interesting but they'll probably just drop it for the actual mv lol#yeah i'm still not over the mood film#i had SO MANY theories and i was looking forward to the mv to answer my questions#and then................... nothing#ah damn i forgot the tws#tw: flashing lights
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just out of curiosity: for friends and followers with schizophrenia, psychosis, or any other mental disorder causing delusions/hallucinations, how do you feel about suitcase ii being a representation of that?
ii doesn't have the best track record for mental disorder representation as it is (cough cough paper cough cough bomb cough cough cabby), so i have reason to be skeptical about suitcase... from my perspective, as someone without any such disorder, the handling of her mental disorder is unnuanced but well-intentioned at best, and a tacky, cliched attempt to create drama at worst. but i'd like to hear what other people think! thank you!
#melonposting#inanimate insanity#ii#ii suitcase#<- maintagging only to get more perspectives! :)#i don't think her writing is malicious at all. but it does seem pretty stereotyped#i think it has been utilized in interesting ways both for suitcase as a character and for the narrative as a whole#especially when her visions were juxtaposed to mephone's flashbacks in ii13. i think that was really fascinating#but the very fact that it's some *ambiguous* delusion/hallucination disorder makes it seem like... a way to stir the pot as it were?#like they made her have her own reality-questioning issues just to make the whole existential threat of late ii2 more dramatic?#which admittedly ties into people's critique of cabby's memory issues being used to foreshadow everyone's lack of backstory before ii#and that critique is understandable. but i don't feel like her mental disorder was written explicitly for that purpose#but as someone with memory issues myself i can weigh in on that#i don't have a mental disorder like suitcase's so i can't know how nuanced her writing really is#and so i'm more likely to err on the side of caution in her case#but anyway... yeah :]
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imo karlach’s soul coin usage seems like it should have been a little more significant than it was.
she only ever really stops to consider the magnitude of burning through a person’s soul for power during an origin playthrough—otherwise she rationalizes to the player that they’re doomed anyway, and if using them gives her an edge in combat, why not use them for good instead of leaving them to be used by evil? the dialogue with lann tarv in act 2, where he tells the story of each soul he's handing over to her, tries to humanize each soul coin, and still she doesn’t really budge and disapproves pretty heavily if she's told no in regards to using them.
it just seems like something that could have caused some kind of conflict between her and wyll, given he sold his soul to a devil in dire circumstances and takes issue with the player for sleeping with mizora, because she 1) is mizora, and 2) similarly expends tormented souls during her romance scene, even if for a different purpose. but it just... never really comes up?
i love karlach. but that seems like it should have gone Somewhere, from a writing standpoint? karlach values wyll as a person but is willing to use currency forged from souls like his for the sake of a temporary power up. she knows the soul is consumed when she uses them. that whole exchange with lann tarv is there to emphasize that every soul coin she destroys was a person once. but it all kind of loses narrative purpose if this combination of factors doesn't mean anything? karlach doesn't change at all in her willingness to use soul coins, no matter what the player says or how much she cares for wyll.
idk. missed opportunity that wyll doesn't have any dialogue about this, of all things.
#destroying souls is otherwise unambiguously portrayed as A Pretty Bad Thing To Do in bg3. so it just seems weird to go#yeah using this destroys a soul but it makes me stronger and it feels GREAT!#and stick to that no matter what without really questioning it much#ethel's vicious mockery line about her selling every soul but her own just doesn't hit right if it flat out doesn't. matter at all.#plus. idk. something something soul coins apparently are difficult for non-evil characters to even have in their possession#so using them and fully destroying the souls within seems kind of. idk. significant from a character standpoint#disclaimer: not character hate obvi. i love karlach and her relationship with wyll is very good.#but idk. conflict is interesting! and that seems like somewhere it should have happened if you have both in the party#karlach sans wyll might never question using soul coins but karlach with wyll probably should have?#in the same way wyll's character changes somewhat whether he chooses to kill karlach or spare her#as it stands this is like how using the tadpoles makes a grand total of one roll in the game harder. there's no bite. no consequence. idk#not every character has to change to be good but idk. idk!#it all seems set up to make her reconsider at SOME point#and that she just doesn’t is in itself a pretty significant moral compromise on her part#that is just not. recognized or discussed basically ever#karlach#karlach cliffgate#bg3#baldur’s gate 3
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I’m watching Voltron: Legendary Defender for the first time and here is what I have had to say per each season (this is 1-2) (3-4) (5-6) (7) (8)
Pre-Watch Knowledge
->big transformers type robot
->pretty alien girl that looks like princess yue from A:tLA
->they are the epitome of color-coded characters
->space??
->there was crazy people in the fanbase that sent cupcakes laced with something to the creators
->queer baiting (this one in particular got me)
->klance.
->^honestly I only knew that because people were comparing it to zukka and I wanted to check it out
->my friend really likes it
Post S1 thoughts-
->that cliffhanger was crazy imagine they weren’t renewed for a s2
-> i went on tumblr after and youre telling me they made that show IN TWO YEARS?? EIGHT SEASONS. IN TWO MF YEARS?? that is insane. props to the writers bro they fr must of known what they were doing.
->all of these characters already scream “doomed by the narrative”
->my fav characters are pidge and lance
->I definitely did NOT expect yue Allura to be British
->bonding moment.
->^like yeah okay i get it now
-> the healing pods are a very interesting concept. Like, what if you get some ailment that it doesn’t recognize?? Do you just die??
-> genuinely felt so bad for Not Yue. Allura. Allura when they had to remove her father’s memory thing. Like yeah I know the castle was corrupted or wtv but bro imagine. Your entire race is dead. your mom, who you previously knew alive is now most likely dead. You already had to go through losing your father once, and now you have to lose him again. Any sliver of hope you had of staying connected with him is gone, because the entirety of his essence is now gone. She’s stronger than me, I would have never given him up so easily. I admire that about her.
->I also made the horrible mistake of going on ao3 after
yk for gits and shiggles… and when I go to a new fandom I always search by hits to see the classics first yk
…
WHY are you guys so 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴𝔂… I genuinely shed a tear what. I was flabbergasted to say the least.
On that note the top 23 were about redguy/blueguy getting smoochy-smoochy with each other so I guess that should be a hint as to what you guys like
->the description of the show says the robot (voltron) is operated by “five teenagers” but that shiro guy has to be AT LEAST 25. He is pushing 30 you can’t convince me otherwise.
->for now it’s kinda giving atla except the war is intergalactic and lasted 10,000 years instead of 100.
->all the other characters seem to have a pretty clear background, but we haven’t yet heard about Keith’s backstory, so I want to know (I know now, this was my initial thought)
->shiros backstory/ptsd is very interesting, lots of angst possibilities i see
-> I had an inkling that pidge was…genderly different. (At first I thought she was transmasc)
Post S2
-> WHERE is my man. Where did he go.
-> Pookie please come back. Now. It’s not a suggestion.
->KEITH BACKSTORY I PREDICTED THEY WERE GONNA SHOW US YAY I LOVE BEING RIGHT
-> he’s galra! Soooo much whump opportunity
-> the whole “Allura doesn’t hate you she’s just a little upset to find out ur part of the race that killed off her entire peoples and family and okay maybe she does hate you” scene with keith and hunk is really giving that scene in atla: the southern raiders where zuko thinks katara hates him and sokka reassures him (badly) while he was just trying to get laid w suki.
->^ that’s gay
-> the aliens they met are going to be very important, aren’t they?
->^ oohhh so this is where the “langst” stuff comes from? he’s just kinda insecure i think, but it can’t possibly just be this episode that has that tag so high, unless flanderization is just really popular with you guys, but already suspect that unfortunately
->^Allura high key ate with this
->the “Blade of Marmora” people are definitely gonna be important later
-> the mall episode was soooo fun! fav s2 episode for sure!
->^gay. It’s literally giving “two bros chillin in a hot tub. five feet apart cus they’re not gay”
-> I know of 2 ships now. klance and allurance. I only see the former though, the latter seems more like a running gag/unrequited crush thing (for now i suppose)
-> Coran is an icon. I love that whimsical man. he’s beekeeping age per say.
-> I need pidge to find her brother and father man I feel so bad for her PLEASE DOBT TELL ME THEYRE DEAD ILL LITERALLY DIE.
-> pidge is sooooo cool i love her so much she’s literally the pookiest of the pookies
-> Who tf is gonna be the black paladin now. Keith sure as hell isn’t ready for that. maybe Allura?? Cus yk she kinda already leads them a little bit
These are thoughts I had compiled over a while now. I am on S5E3 as of now (07/03/24) but I wanted to document my thoughts either way. I will post on the tag “laura’s first vld”
#laura’s first vld#vld#first voltron watch#first time watch#I try to skip spoilers as much as I can but there’s only so much you can do when ur constantly yapping about ur hyperfixation to your phone#the healing pods are a very interesting thing tho#I’ll never let go of that. what if idfk ur appendix burst or something? do alteans have appendixes?? this actually raises more questions#alien anatomy is really interesting#even now i still don’t understand what ‘quinntessence’ is#“oh it’s like a life fuel/the essence of life” yeah no still confused. is it carbon?? cus that’s what makes organic life?? crazy#there’s a lot of hypotheticals regarding this shows scientific element#Voltron#voltron legendary defender
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Hi milgramblr questions guy is back
(try not to pick none, for my data's sake. None is there cuz t2s verdicts are more agreed on than t1 was)
There will be a second poll look out for that
EDIT: feel free to rb with reasonings!! I love seeing those
#milgram#milgram project#answer my questions boy#im not tagging the prisoners thatd take way too long haha#anyways personal answer? none really#if you remmeber me talking about amane back when it looks like id disagree with this outcome but honestly im neutral towards it#like. understandable+it will make t3 very interesting so i dont even disagree with the verdict itself#at most...mahiru? in rhat im just unsure as to how the vote would affect her#i get the reasoning and i did innocent vote her but. also.#yeah im picking none. oopsie#look out for the pair poll to this
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Thinking bout the time someone yelled at me because they didn't understand butches.
#feeling some kind of way about telling queer stories lately#and what makes something “queer enough”#which. in my opinion is that any story I tell is queer enough because I am a queer person telling stories about queer characters#but there are always going to be people who call that into question if boys arent kissing boys and girls arent kissing girls#in easy uncomplicated ways#looking glasses is meant to be messy#everyone is at turning points in their lives. they're young adults whose identities and relatio ships aren't fully formed yet#but those complications (in my opinion) are what make the story queer#what are dess's pronouns? she/her but only because she hasnt had a chance to think about anything else#when an overbearing mother got her daughter back after they were missing for years#she might have a hard time adjusting to her child maybe not being her “daughter”#which is queerer: two women getting together or breaking up?#i dont think it matters#but I find these in between spaces interesting to explore#and it's my story that I'm doing for free#so even if dess looks too much like a man#i dont owe it to anybody to conform my story to someone else's expectations#(long ramble that probably isnt very coherent)#(i've just been thinking about some of this stuff lately. and this is the funniest response I've ever gotten to the comic)#(like yeah. she is a girl. good job!)#(i dont often get hate on the comic (which I'm glad for) so whenever I do I find the types of hate really fascinating)#(and dont worry. I got this months ago. I've just been thinking about it again recently and laughing)#nickel for my thoughts
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Something that just occurred to be is that is isn't extremely weird for Neku and Sho to only be allowed to use one pin at a time? Because we know for sure that in the og Neku was able to use six of them and we can easily guess that Sho could as well, given his Imagination level. It's likely that Beat could, too, but I'm not well versed enough in the og's gameplay to tell.
In any case, neither Neku nor Sho can use more than one pin at once. Another piece of dialogue from Sho also reveals that the level caps on the pins have been removed, making them usable by any player regardless of their level.
Those two factors are some pretty big changes—we see how surprised Sho is when he realizes the latter. My question is: how were they made possible?
There is no reason why Kariya or Uzuki, when in control of Shibuya, would make those changes. Joshua wouldn't have either, because they make no sense in Shibuya's Game. So that only leaves Shiba, who probably made them to fit Shinjuku's rules better. Only thing is, that Sho has been Conductor before, so he should have been aware that this was a possibility. Yet his reaction makes me believe that he never considered it possible (it is possible that he didn't consider it simply because he didn't think about it or because it wouldn't have helped him with his plans anyway, but I think he genuinely didn't know it could be done) which then leads to the logical conclusion of: only a higher power could've done this.
I believe Kubo's the one who made those changes to Shibuya's Game, or Shiba, but thanks to Kubo's powers—in any case, it's a intervention of the Higher Plane. Sho isn't stupid and probably guessed it right away. I am thus adding this to the list of hints he got in order to guess who was behind all of this
#Neku couldn't have followed the same logic because he didn't know that conductors couldn't do that#and Beat probably didn't even question it. the Game is fucked up already he can't really bother with theorycrafting#anyway yeah it's not very interesting but it just crossed my mind so i'm sharing it#i think it's fascinating how Kubo and Shiba altered the Game and what it tells about the differences#between Shibuya and Shinjuku and what their respective Games looked like and what their aims were#while Shibuya was focused on personal development (more refined souls could use more pins#and more powerful ones); Shinjuku is more akin to an arena or a circus where all the players have access to all weapons#and it's up to them to use them and make the show interesting before they inevitably die (or miraculously end up winning)#(even if in neo it was impossible Shoka's story explains that it was possible to win back in Shinjuku)#(the secret reports also add that Shinjuku is a game that's focused on killing as many players at once as possible)#anyway. twewy rules#twewy#twewy spoilers#neo twewy#neo twewy spoilers#sho minamimoto#tanzo kubo#neku sakuraba#shiba miyakaze
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Hot take of the day is that I think sanderson not letting adolin murdering sadeas have any real consequences killed like 95% of interesting debate on the morality of it
#it serves some narrative point on some character arcs#but it could have been so much more interesting than sanderson made it#like right now it’s just kinda pointless#to talk about#nobody cares about sadeas so it’s not emotional#and the closest we can get to a philosophical debate is adolin and dalinar being kinda awkward about it#which again would have been interesting if anything actually came out of it#but it didn’t#now it’s just a question of whether you should be allowed to take the law into your own hands like that#which I think could be very interesting if we took a look at the power position adolin holds#as highprince and heir etc.#should he be allowed to make that type of decisions#sadeas was an asshole but how does this play into how he solves other conflicts#if not for his dad and cousin being the ones in charge would someone else be treated differently#this type of thing was exactly why people didn’t want to work with the alethi to begin with#what are the political implications#blah blah#even if saying ‘yeah it was right it was necessary and sadeas sucked’#it would have been more interesting if there was anything to compare it to rather than just#‘well now we don’t have to deal with sadeas anymore that’s convenient’
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au where mike narrowly escapes the upsidedown while on patrol and gets an obscure curse to be a catboy for a month. this is amusing to everyone but mike.
#catmike au#dont know if people will like this au of mine or not but ill keep posting doodles of it cause its funny#dustin is very interested in the curse and is also conveniently the onely one who has owned a cat#hes tests things almost immediately in such excitement#basically its just him seeing mike in the living room and running quickly to his house because he needs to grab some things#its also set vaguely post s5 so some of the byers share the wheeler house#lets just say the wheelers went off for the apocalypse#dustin comes back with a laser pointer and catnip (to the others it honest to god looks like weed)#then of course hes inspecting him and asking questions like seeing if his human ears are gone and if he can move his tail and all that#they find very quickly that he can purr when will comes over next to him curiously#this def disturbs other upsidown meeting because imagine nancy's talking and in the middle of it its just *LOUD PURRING*#mike does chase lasers (out of his control) and he can in fact get hopped up on catnip#which makes him go zoomies or purr crazy loud and it makes him shove his whole body all over will like a strange clingy 5 yr old#also his pupils can go big and small and as expected it goes massive when hes on catnip#everyone finds this hilarious and they make a game of who can secretly get mike catnipped#will is the unwilling victim because he's the cat's (and mike's ofc) assighned so he'll just be sitting and then he'll#hear running qnd suddenly mikes holding his arm up and rubbing against it while purring very loudly#anyways i may have written that for no one in particular but yeah theres some cat au!#st mike#mike wheeler#stranger things#stranger things fanart#byler#st mike wheeler#mike wheeler stranger things#will byers#byler fanart#st will#st will byers#its supposed to say that wills the cats favourite person idk tumblr deleted it cause something something formatting
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2023 reads
The Deep Sky
scifi mystery thriller
on a deep space mission traveling from an environmentally devastated earth with hope to restart humanity elsewhere
when they’re halfway, an explosion kills 3 crew and pushes them off course
the only witness is the Alternate who has no specific role, and she has to figure out who caused it & if they might continue to sabotage, while they're figuring out a way to get back on course with limited resources
flips between present and the past: of her childhood and training for the mission, her identity struggles, and relationship with her mother
questions the ethics of ‘restarting’ humanity elsewhere vs putting resources into fixing earth
#the deep sky#yume kitasei#aroaessidhe 2023 reads#i really loved this!!!!!#very intense but also a lot of interesting character introspection#love the virtual reality AI aspect!!!! though I do feel like. in the end I was expecting it to go way further with it?#(basically like instead of seeing the inside of the ship all the time they can 'be' in forests or aquariums or whatever)#no romance#(there’s side lesbians; and one flashback scene where she briefly wonders about kissing a random person; that's it)#emotional core about her mother and brother and best friend !!#i like that it gets into the flaws of 'humanity's last hope on another planet' bc like. yeah in real life things....don't work like that...#why is there zero acknowledgement that the concept of every one of them being expected to give birth being extremely fucked up?#like obviously everyone on board is there because they agreed with that but there’s not a single flashback of#when they found out that information; or mention of someone questioning it...#(for example a character mentions that they hid their mental health/use of a therapy animal bc they wouldn't have been let in and the -#eugenics around that is iffy to say the least)#but to me. pregnancy is horrifying and nobody questioning that was weird.#also there’s supposedly 80 people on board but we get to know less than 10 of them which felt a bit strange at points#Also! I love the cover. I can’t find the designer (the book info only credits the internal lllustrator..)#also: bird facts!
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trying to work out what exactly was going on in 73 yards
#got a LOT of thoughts on this one ngl#bethan talks about dw#dw spoilers#there was a lot i liked about it. some things i'm not too sure on. some things i will be rotating around my brain for like a week.#it also very much did not go in the direction i thought it was going to#in some ways i kind of wish we'd got a full folk horror ep bc that would've been neat#however i do think it was interesting as it was even if i'm not sure it 100% fitted together!#main questions though are a) who was the Woman. bc i'm not sure she was ruby before that last scene tbh#and b) what was she saying that freaked people out so much?#idk it felt a little weird for them to hinge so much of the episode on those two questions and then. never really answer them hm#but yeah not trying to sound too negative!! i think i did enjoy it on balance there's just a lot to think about haha 😅
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Sorry i saw your tags abt living on water and grew up in FL on a canal and a lake! There are plants that discourage bugs and citronella does help keep them at bay. We had bug lanterns for the stubborn ones but aside from a few mosquito bites or bees around the porch they were never a big issue
!!! INTERESTING...i love the idea of lakeside/seaside/rural/forest cottage living but i know the reality of living there is very different, like i didn't even think about how salt winds would be an issue for seaside living for example
i'm pretty afraid of bugs in the house though (especially the kind with lots of legs that live in the basement corners) but maybe a lakeside vacation one day.................
#anon#replies#thanks for chiming in!! i'm always interested in hearing about this kind of stuff#i'm always very appreciative that people take the time to answer random questions in my queued posts#but yeah every time i open the basement storage door i just stand there for a moment#with my eyes closed#so that anything that i startled can retreat into the shadows where I Do Not See It#i don't mind bugs outside though but i think that's because i expect them there#i don't want them inside the house.........................
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thinking about how my friend told me today that i picked a “safe” special interest in the netherlands.
#once she explained it it makes sense though#what she meant was its an interest wherein no one has negative preconceived notions about me when they hear about it#like when i was going through my germany phase a lot of people took that the wrong way unfortunately#which you know… it took me going to germany to challenge that two dimensional association too#like i knew obviously about the problematic past of germany but i wasn’t interested in it like that#i just loved the language and culture#and then you look at commmon special interests#harry potter? oh you’re a terf. disney? zionist. star wars? right wing#like yeah while the netherlands is very much problematic and has questionable history regarding colonialism#people aren’t exactly immediately going There#idk im yapping but i am still thinking about it
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.
#update on the crush situation for everyone reading along to my suffering (/lighthearted)#you know this feeling when someone just. looks so fucking good you can't even *look* at them?#yeah#there is this absolutely average looking man old enough to be my dad with his stupid mop of grey hair#wearing a black t-shirt with a silly little czech phrase on it and a grey jeans a little tighter than average#and he had one hand behind his head waiting for us to give an answer and thereby pulled up the shirt a bit#and i had to pretend looking at my notes because. idk. it certainly felt like he'd realize exactly what was going on in m head if i didn't.#and it certainly not dante i was thinking about#anyway#my stupid little crush#to delete later#who knew it could get worse than the sweater this morning#edit: also. the list of 'inappropriate questions i'd like to ask him' has gained another entry after 'are you by any chance queer?'#and it's 'are you religious?' because he made a very interesting throwaway comment about purgatory today
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