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phosphophy11ite · 2 years ago

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Neon Genesis Evangelion Ep 2 "The Beast" -> Review/analysis ^_^

the second ep opens with the sachiel and unit 1 fighting. it's not going so well. while shinji has been able to sync amazingly with the eva, he still has no idea what he's doing and is pretty defenseless to sachiel's attacks. we get a glimpse that the eva might be more than a robot pretty soon in the series:

what kind of robot bleeds?? the fight scene then cuts to shinji waking up in the hospital, confused and disorientated. we don't know what happened between unit 1 and sachiel, but shinji must've defeated the angel as seen in the next scene shows the government cleaning the damage from the fight. shinji won, but the viewer still doesn't know how. episode 2 also introduces us to seele. gendo is shown discussing the battle with seele officials, who allude to the human instrumentality project, telling gendo it's his largest priority. one member also makes this comment, which again highlights the selfishness of war and that the government really does not care about the wellbeing of the eva pilots (which are just tools and weapons to them). 'this' refers to the appearance of the angel.

misato and ritsuko discuss the battle together. it's a miracle that unit 1 won, though it's not been revealed how to the viewer yet. misato is concerned about shinji's mental and physical state after the battle, and ritsuko reveals why shinji's in the hospital. in the exchange below, ritsuko takes an analytical, objective-type approach to shinji's injury as a scientist/doctor would, while the emotional misato snarkily corrects her: since the injury impacts shinji's psychological state, it's his heart that's getting hurt. this little interaction features ritsuko being more removed and less empathetic, and misato criticizing her for it. this conflict between the two of them will continue and escalate throughout the series, with misato seeing ritsuko as cold and robotic and ritsuko seeing misato as overly-emotional-- though she sympathizes with her. remind you of any other two female characters?

misato then picks shinji up from the hospital. shinji and gendo have an awkward exchange, and shinji breaks eye contact with gendo angrily. this is his way of telling gendo that he didn't pilot unit 1 for his father's approval, but i do think his father's approval played a role in his decision. gendo and shinji don't want to live together. they've spent most of shinji's life separated, and their relationship is obviously not the best. the ikaris both find it easier to isolate themselves to avoid conflict and/or connection with others.

misato, feeling bad for shinji, invites him to live at her apartment. they stop at a grocery store on the way over, and shinji overhears a conversation between two women about the dangerous battle the night before and how they're leaving tokyo because of it. reminder that shinji still can't recall exactly what happened. once misato stocks up on beer and snacks, she takes a detour to look over the city with shinji. they comment on how beautiful it is, and misato tells him this is the city he saved. shinji still doesn't remember what happened. i think it's quite possible that he's blocking the memories out on purpose.

once they arrive at misato's apartment, it's revealed that misato is a real slob. there's nothing in the fridge besides beer, ice, and snacks, and the entire apartment is littered with takeaway containers and miscellaneous boxes. this mess further exemplifies misato's immaturity. during dinner, misato acts quite childish.

but when shinji leaves to go take a bath, it is revealed that (most) of misato's antics were a ruse to make him feel more at ease. she worries he's seen through them.

meanwhile at nerv, ritsuko and gendo discuss the evas and the battle with sachiel. ritsuko questions if its just to force the children to pilot the evas regardless of their feelings and gendo, unsurprisingly, says it's fine. ritsuko is really not as cold as she appears. like most of the characters in the series, she puts up a wall between the feelings of others and herself to protect herself, but we'll see more of that later... the next shot shows a motionless unit 0 attacking the observation desk where ritsuko and gendo stand. this is why the robot was out of commission, and it offers a glimpse at the conflict between mankind and their creations.

back at misato's, misato is taking a bath and calls ritsuko. misato wonders if shinji will continue to pilot the eva and ritsuko says he should as long as he is still "operable". ritsuko's word choice hints that shinji is a tool, though we know ritsuko has her own doubts about the morality of the whole operation. doubts she doesn't show misato (lack of communication, failure to connect with others... these are flaws that are present throughout the cast). misato hangs up and reflects on the day before, where she urged shinji to get into the eva. she feels guilty:

shinji is now in bed, and the memories of the fight flood back to him. right when sachiel had him cornered, about to go in for the final blow, unit 1 goes berserk. the nerv scientists, ritsuko, and misato are shown watching the ordeal with horrified looks on their faces while gendo smirks. they fear this machine they've created, maybe even more than they fear the angel.

bersek unit 1 attacks sachiel in a ravenous manner. it does not fire its guns but uses a piece of debris to stab sachiel over and over again. this is not the cold, calculated violence of a machine but the overwhelming anger and fear of a crime of passion. it's terrifying. sachiel self-destructs, but unit 1 remains intact. the battle has been won.

shinji is fished out from the eva, and gets a glimpse of what it looks like under its armor:

what is this thing? how much control does nerv have over it?

this episode is titled "the beast", and while we first think the beast refers to sachielf, it becomes overwhelmingly clear that the beast is actually the evangelion. now that shinji remembers the ordeal, how is he going to react? find out next time dundundundnnnnn

#my writing #neon genesis evangelion #i rly love this episode

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gotyouanyway · 10 months ago

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the next life anon here! thanks, at least knowing there’s something relevant to their dynamic at the end makes it sort of worthwhile. re the creed of the kromon - yeah for me it was the misogynistic torture porn. in my specific case anything pregnancy related is just a super hard no so that’s why i found it so personally offputting. that’s just me though, not really a reflection on the quality of the story.

in terms of comparing it to scherzo or tnhof - in the first place i think in both cases, the story is just a lot better, which insulates them from any grossness by at least making listening to them more enjoyable. and in both cases there’s something else going on to the body horror or sexual assault. scherzo obviously is very consciously using its body horror as a vehicle to examine love and codependency but even tnhof is interrogating agency and the lack thereof under a totalitarian state. (i read the reference to rape in tnhof as a direct allusion to 1984 but idk if im right on that). i don’t love the way tnhof references assault, i don’t think the story really needed it, but it did at least have some use within the story.

creed of the kromon, on the other hand, subjects charley to metamorphosis purely for the sake of it - the worst part, and what really seals for deal for me in terms of it being unsalvageable, is that she doesn’t remember it and as of halfway through the next life it’s literally never brought up again. so we don’t get to hear her process it, there’s no examination of what this might mean for her as someone who yearns to be a mother, there’s no character moments whatsoever. l’da’s fate is classic fridging, which would be misogynistic but not really worse than other big finish audios, and so at least provides a lot of character work for c’rizz, but there is literally no point whatsoever to it happening to charley other than for the listener to hear her being subjected to it. that’s why for me anyway creed of the kromon is so egregiously bad.

to be really clear though i’m not trying to make a sweeping moral claim here! i personally did not enjoy it for those reasons but i can totally understand that what’s a dealbreaker to me absolutely wouldn’t be for someone with a higher tolerance for body horror etc. and i would be a real hypocrite to say that i’ve never enjoyed a story where a main character is tortured! those are just the reasons why for me i find it much harder to listen to than other audios with a comparable level of body horror.

ironically i do think if the stuff with charley and l’da wasn’t in it creed of the kromon would rank relatively high on my list of divergent universe eps - the story is pretty decent and i certainly found it much more interesting than the last, which i thought was just so boring. and i would put the next life below creed of the kromon in and of itself i think just because christ it’s a slog. not to mention the racist overtones and the crime of finally having daphne ashbrook in an audio and giving her a role basically indistinguishable from an early bond girl (highly derogatory). anyway, thanks for your support in these trying next life times and hope this answer is a bit helpful too!

i totally get this!! you're definitely in the majority here. it's not that i never noticed all the misogyny (i don't want to come across as someone who needs these things pointed out to me lol), i think i just responded to it differently than a lot of other people did (less disgust, more exhausted disappointment). and that's why i didn't *quite* understand the popular opinion, but i get it better now.

and i totally agree about charley.. but again i think the reason most of this stuff wasn't a total dealbreaker for me is that it's unfortunately not that unique. scherzo is never brought up again either, charley forgets what happens in the last, she doesn't even seem to give a shit when c'rizz chokes her out twice.. it's an ongoing problem of charley being hurt and not being allowed to deal with it, so to me creed is just another unfortunate example of that :/

i said more stuff in the reblogs/replies of your original ask btw! and thanks for the explanation <3

#p #asks #sorry if this is incoherent i've been talking about it for like over an hour now and i feel like i'm dying

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a-tad-bit-obsessed · 1 year ago

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I fully realise this is mainly for my own reference on Friday, but now, 2.05

How long do we think it’s been then since Tai and Van have seen each other?

And Van’s morning routine has another dimension now we know

How young does someone need to be to not know what VHS is?

Still, Tai in her letterman’s jacket saying ‘happy wife, happy life’ is the greatest thing ever

Van in Lottie’s sessions says about the cold, how it makes her feel alive, is this in contrast to nearly dying in a fire (several times)

Akilah’s little shrug at Tai of I have no clue

Dead dickish cop, just because you haven’t kissed her, doesn’t make any of this even vaguely right

Now I know the end of her story, I see Crystal’s character very differently (you know, now I’m not expecting her to kill Ben for Misty or something like that). It’s just all so tragic

WHAT QUESTIONS SHOULD WE BE ASKING ABOUT THE MOON LANDING, MISTY?

The dripping is in the background of the scenes when Van is watching someone’s home tapes (and a few other times in the modern day timeline)

Akilah’s explanations on superstitions and faiths, that if it felt good, if it helped them feel better, then why not do it

Just Akilah and Tai’s friendship this episode, all of it

Wait, I’ve just realised, we might never know if the reason why Javi isn’t speaking is because he saw Snackie

Is Nat just annoyed at Misty because she thinks Misty will ruin her plans to sneak into Lottie’s place?

Okay so there’s clearly rocks just above Crystal’s body, I want to now see how visible they are when Misty comes back

When do we think Van told Taissa about her mother, in the wilderness? When they were rescued?

Also Van’s ‘people reassess their choices when they know they’re about to die’, that’s May reference quite a bit (Van currently, Nat in the past when being hunted etc)

The fact that Taissa went to Van for help with sleepwalking and Van seemed to understand why Van went to her specifically

Travis may not have died in the snow but he did get fridges for Natalie and Lottie’s character development

And like is Javi’s ‘friend’ Other Taissa on times she’s got away from Van? Javi seemed to be near the tree with the symbol and Other Taissa did find several of those

Yeah the dripping is in the background for several Van scenes (and there was that one with past Van a few eps ago of it dripping in time with Van blinking)

And look, Other Taissa missed her girlfriend (and Van doesn’t seem to be that scared of her, not like Taissa is)

If Nat stayed as a non-believer whilst out there, then I can imagine her admitting there was something out there it’s be terrifying to Lottie

#yellowjackets #yellowjackets spoilers

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oneweekobsession · 7 years ago

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Violet Creams

A CTM fic.

Val gets a telling off. Set in 7.5 (also here, without the typos: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13850883)

Phyllis reaches over for another licorice torpedo and then, with it halfway to her mouth, she sits up suddenly. 'Which fridge?'

Val, her mind still on Lucille's problems, is slow in catching up.

Phyllis is unforgiving of her mental tardiness. 'Which fridge? Which refrigerator have you put the violet creams in?'

Fully in the picture now, Valerie opens her mouth. She closes it again. She has made a fatal error.

'Nurse Dyer, we've had words about this once this month already.'

Phyllis, Val can tell, is winding herself up to unleash chapter and verse of the Nursing Regulations, no doubt with a hefty serving of the Nonnatus House Code of Conduct mixed in for good measure piled on.

'The refrigerator in the clinical room is not to be used for the storage of confectionary. It is not - as you are well aware - an appropriate repository for the stockpiling of comestible items. It is, as you also know very well, neither a hygienic nor particularly safe environment for food, and as for the dangers of cross contamination...'

Once Phyllis gets going, Val knows from experience, she can keep going for a while. Phyllis has remarkable stamina in the issuing-of-reprimands department. Even in this heat. Valerie makes another feeble effort at interjecting, but Phyllis waves it away, and keeps on. Valerie reasons she'll be lucky to get away with being rota'd for extra shifts on deep cleaning duty at this rate.

As Phyllis keeps going, Lucille catches Val's eye, sympathetically. Valerie feels an odd fondness tug at her heart. It gives her courage, of a sort.

'But - ' she tries again.

'No buts. You will take those chocolates out of that fridge at your earliest convenience. Hiding them away like that like a secret - I'm surprised at you. Most of all, it's not like you to be so - ungenerous.'

That stings, a little. See, that's the thing, really. It isn't that Valerie's not generous. She is - to a fault, her dad would sometimes say. But the first lesson anyone at Nonnatus House learns is that if any sweet treat is left unattended anywhere on the premises, it will, fairly promptly and not-so-mysteriously disappear without a trace. And - well - to put it bluntly, Sister Monica Joan is banned from the fridge in the clinical room.

'I'm not hiding them. They aren't a secret. I've just told you where they are.'

Phyllis harumphs. 'Well. You will take them out of that refrigerator, and then you will make sure that the whole area is spotless. I don't want any hint of contamination anywhere near it.'

Lucille gives Val another small smile, but there's laughter in her eyes. That fondness tugs at Valerie's heart again.

Because that's the thing. That's the thing. It's not like Valerie was ever planning on keeping the chocolates to herself. Because ever since they were handed to her by Mrs Hagger, Val's had this little bubble of a growing idea. Just a couple of days earlier, she and Lucille had spent a pleasant tea break in swapping stories about the food that reminded them of home ('Just wait until you try my auntie Edie's pie and mash' - 'It'll be nothing to my mother's special saltfish' - 'I dare you to say that to auntie Edie' - 'I dare you to say that to my mother!'). Val couldn't help but thinking of that when Mrs Hagger put the sweets in her hand: violet creams were Val's mother's special treat, bought for Christmas, birthdays, and other, select, special occasions.

And so, this little bubble of an idea that Val has - a silly idea, perhaps, but it's one which since it occurred to her Val has become strongly attached to - is that she'd like to share the violet creams with Lucille. It's daft, she knows, but somehow, she feels like she needs to show Lucille that little bit of herself, and her history, and her family, and her Poplar. But when she'd got back to Nonnatus, the sweets were not at their best: over-warm and sweating and claggy to the taste, and so she had put them in the fridge to spare them from Sister Monica Joan's embrace for one evening at least and - well, trying to explain all of this to Phyllis seems far too complicated, and so Val decides not to try.

'I'll sort it,' she says.

'See that you do.'

****

'So these are your secret sweet treats,' Lucille says, the next afternoon, while she's on call and Val's just returned from her rounds. Lucille picks a chocolate from the bag, and popping it in her mouth.

'They were never a secret,' Val says.

'No,' Lucille agrees. 'The refrigerator is looking spotless, by the way.'

'But what do you think?' Val urges. She's not sure why, but Lucille's opinion on the matter somehow seems to matter quite a lot to her.

Lucille tastes again. 'Different,' she says. 'Very - you.'

The ringing of the telephone prevents Val's reply.

#aaaaah after about five billion years of not writing i have written a fic #i am very much long out of practice #i don't know why there doesn't seem to be any fic yet about these guys #and because i wanted it and there was none i decided i had to write it #i have not written for a long time and it turns out i have forgotten how to finish stories #what i have not forgotten (alas) is how to fixate upon an object #as if it is somehow significant and freighted with meaning #(previously: pyjamas; currently: violet creams)#nor how to write quite a lot of words with out any actual literal actual plot #anyway anyway #this is about low-key lucille/val #with a side order of phyllis being grumpy #basically i don't know whether lucille/val will be canon #but what i do know is that the reference to the fridge in this ep was a call back to the chocolates in the fridge #in the magda ep #and that valerie's persistent misbehaviour in this regard has for many months been getting phyllis's metaphorical goat #ctm #my fic #(this isn't properly proofed so forgive typos etc)

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outerspacesteve · 4 years ago

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The Falcon and the Winter Soldier Wishlist:

In honour of tfatws coming out, here’s a list of things I want to see in the show, except they are all unrealistic, random, almost certainly won’t happen, and would serve no purpose to the plot:

[minor spoilers for tfatws ep. 1]

Sam looking for the shield, only to walk into the kitchen to see Bucky eating cereal out of it

Sam and Bucky play frisbee with the shield

“Let’s hear it for Captain America!” (but this time Bucky says it in reference to Sam)

Bucky detaching his arm when Sam is tugging on it and annoying him, so that Sam is just left standing there, holding Bucky’s metal arm, while Bucky just walks away

Bucky keeping his metal arm in the fridge until it is freezing to the touch, so that he can shock Sam by touching the back of his neck with his freezing fingers

“Don’t think I’ve forgotten about when you pulled me out of the sky in DC. Watch your back, Buck. Watch. Your. Back.”

Bucky taking the piss out of Sam for not being able to throw the shield perfectly on his first attempt (see here for a whole drabble I wrote for this headcanon😼)

Bucky not being able to figure out how to use a mobile phone, and either Sam refusing to help him, or Bucky refusing help from Sam (I was going to add that Sam films him struggling, and sends it to Nat so they can all laugh at him but then I remembered she’s dead IM SORRY)

Bucky smiling.

Sam saying “I’m not perfect but I never was that person. I’m Samuel Wilson, raised by Paul and Darlene Wilson to fight people like you for a better world. And like it or not, n*zi — I am Captain America.” like he says in the comics

Sam asking Bucky to pay for the damage he caused to his car on the bridge in The Winter Soldier, even though the insurance company paid for it, and he’s already gotten a new car since

Sam trying to make Bucky wear some of the most outrageously horrendous clothing by attempting to convince him that this is just what the fashion is nowadays

Honestly just Sam lying to Bucky about the 21st century. Like trying to make him believe that certain things exist in the 21st century, or that the 21st century has certain things you couldn’t even dream of in the 40s

Sam sending Bucky to the supermarket, asking him to buy a product that doesn’t actually exist

Sam signing Bucky up for bingo night at the local bingo hall with all the old people, except it backfires, because Bucky loves it, and begins to drag Sam along (Sam hates it)

Sam tries to convince Bucky that he did a bunch of increasingly crazy/strange/questionable stuff over the decades as the Winter Soldier, and Bucky just has to go with it because he doesn’t have any knowledge suggesting otherwise (+“Buck, I can’t believe it was you who killed JFK🙄. Do you remember that one?” “Oh, yeah, no I actually remember that one.” “Wait, what— you— WHAT?”)

The set of dog tags that Bucky wears has one of his tags on it, and the other belonged to Steve. They exchanged tags during the war, after Azzano so that they’d ‘never be too far from one another.’ Bucky lost his set while he was with HYDRA, but Steve went into the ice wearing his, so they came to the future with him. He wears them religiously, refusing to take them off - it’s all he has left of Steve (presuming he’s dead, which obviously he isn’t - he’s just on the moon), and all he has left of himself from before HYDRA

PUNS. Sam says awful puns all the time, and each time Bucky is just like 🙄🙄

I can’t decide if I want “Buck” to be a sacred/exclusively Steve-and-Bucky thing, where Sam repeatedly tries to let Bucky call him “Buck,” but each time he does it, perhaps after a mission where he feels like they’ve bonded or something, Bucky is always like “Nope.”/“Is your name Steven Grant Rogers?”/“Did you grow up in depression era Brooklyn?”/*murderous glare until Sam backtracks and corrects himself*/“Absolutely not. Try again,” or if I want Bucky to eventually let Sam refer to him as “Buck.” I don’t know

Sam making fun of Bucky for owning a flip phone

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shinylitwick94 · 3 years ago

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Ok, so Wheel of Time initial thoughts before I get too influenced by the wider internet

I liked these first few episodes!

I’m not a huge WoT fan, but I know enough about the characters and setting to care about adaptation issues here and there, but for the most part I was fine with the changes or actively in favour of them.

It’s not groundbreaking amazing tv, but it is a pretty solid show.

It’s not Shannara, it’s not Eragon. It’s not GoT or LOTR either (please stop comparing everything to those two). It does manage, at least so far, to hold its ground and do its own thing. I would at this stage put it alongside the Witcher in my own personal ranking of fantasy shows. Good, but not extraordinary, and with some issues that will hopefully be polished in later seasons.

If you’re not allergic to fantasy tropes (I understand, personally, I’m allergic to superheros), I would recommend you check it out.

Proper thoughts under the cut because spoilers (books and show)

I think cutting the prologue was a bad idea. I get that for some reason people in the anglosphere seem to hate prologues, but this one specifically was what kept me reading through an otherwise very bland and generic Eye of the World.

Knowing upfront why the dragon is so dangerous raises the stakes a lot right from the get-go, and seeing the madness up close also makes us understand why they go after male channelers so hard. It also ties the ‘chosen one’ to something tangible and not just to the chosen one concept. But ok, whatever, they chose not to do it.

Still on the topic of the Dragon, I personally love the gender-neutral dragon. Few things irritated me more in-story than the girls not being ta’veren. I get that that was partially to keep the ‘surprise’ in the books about which of the boys was the dragon, but frankly there was never any surprise in the books, since it was blatantly obvious from the fact that the book is from Rand’s POV, that the dragon is Rand. Like, there’s no reason why Nyneave with all that she accomplishes later should not be ta’veren when Perrin is. So I’m glad they’re put on the same footing here.

I liked hte changes with Perrin. I’m sure this will be very controversial in some circles, but I’ll take anything that actually gives him a reason for his broodiness.

I still have trouble with the LOTR references, even though I know why they’re there, and I understand that it was just the way things were at the time. Every time the Third Age and Mountains of the Mist get mentioned I am paralyzed by second hand embarrassment.

I liked ep 2 and 3 more than ep 1, I feel like 1 was a bit clunkier in some ways.

There’s an irritating amount of stilted dialogue, especially in Ep 1 village scenes, and the direction feels a bit basic, but it’s not annoying enough to make me not watch.

I kind of expected the show would move extremely fast, but I didn’t think it would be as far as it is by episode 3. It makes sense from a perspective of this show surviving at all (it needs to go through the EotW stuff fast, and get into the things that actually make WoT interesting), but it does leave you with relatively little time to breathe.

Rosamund Pike as Moiraine is absolutely perfect, and the rest of the main cast is amazing too. Lan and Nyneave have a great on-screen dynamic, Egwene and Rand feel just the right kind of awkward and annoying, and Mat and Perrin are both more likeable than their book versions at this stage.

Not very cohertent thoughts, but I’ve enjoyed it so far, and I’m definitely going to follow this one all the way through.

EDIT: On the fridging. I agree, it is undeniably fridging, no question about it, and that’s not good. But it’s worked ok in this story, and the story has plenty of other female characters who do have their own stories and agencies and are very definitely non-fridgeable. Also its implications for Perrin’s developement are significant and not just there to make us feel bad. So, i can live with it.

#shinylitwick watches tv shows #wheel of time #wot #wot show

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faelapis · 5 years ago

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a few things i noticed in a lot of the very bad and basic anti-SU future rants:

1. keep referring to steven as a “psychopath”, which, oof.

2. very, very disappointed steven was able to heal jasper, because of course they are. the most basic, “just started watching nostalgia critic yesterday” people always think that they’re blowing your mind by insisting death should always be a permanent consequence and that there can be no real stakes outside permadeath. despite the fact that steven still feels like a killer, that’s the whole point, and you don’t need to actually fridge jasper to get that across. psychological horror is apparently something they’ve never been exposed to. the absolute power over life & death that the diamonds hold as Absolute Creators of gemkind is a part of the horror. it doesn’t matter what the work itself is trying to say, or how steven is only MORE horrified by his ability to “fix” everything and get away with it, all that matters to these people is making a blanket statement that revival is always a cop-out no matter the context.

3. simultaneously very uninterested in the diamonds as characters yet fully convinced that they’re supposed to just be perfect people now with no more growing to do, as if seeing them continue instances of denialism and microaggressions means nothing, and steven’s counterbalance that actually, that kind of power over others + neglect of the self is horrifying isn’t meant to at least make their happiness over being useful to others ambiguous.

4. big mad they didn’t get to live vicariously through steven taking his revenge out on everyone and destroying beach city in monster form, as if him smashing his own head against the temple cliff and acting like most confused, hurt and terrified corrupted gems we’ve seen before wasn’t a tip-off this is supposed to be a mental breakdown, not a revenge fantasy.

5. big, BIG mad that steven’s support network were there for him and hugged him. really, really think this means “the conflict was solved by a hug!!1!” and Does Not Compute the importance of support networks in trauma. also don’t seem to understand why steven didn’t accept their help earlier, nor how many little ways we’re tipped off in the next ep that steven has slowly been trying to recover for months, such as the gems walking on eggshells around him, him maintaining routines and exercise, getting a therapist, or how he knows he needs to leave in order to not fall into these toxic patterns of codependent selflessness again.

like. hey knuckleheads. steven didn’t accept help earlier because he thought their relationships were contingent on him being a “good person” who “deserved” their help. he thought they would never accept him as a literal or metaphorical monster. therefore, they needed to see him at his worst and still accept him for steven to believe they truly accepted all of him, not just the good parts. its the challenge of how to help a genuinely messed up person, not just the “angel” steven conceptualized he had to be to deserve help. and y’all calling him a psychopath - which, woof the ableism - sure does imply you think so.

#steven universe #su future #why are people like this their tastes are so boring and their analysis so shallow aaargh #i was fearful before because i was avoiding these videos and were afraid they would change my mind but woof #they're just really dumb! turns out!

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bluenet13 · 4 years ago

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It's All In Your Head (Chapter 1/2)

Written for @badthingshappenbingo

Fandom: Chicago Fire

Characters: Matthew Casey, Sylvie Brett, Kelly Severide, Stella Kidd, Wallace Boden, Firehouse 51.

Prompt: Hair Matted with Blood

Summary: Post-ep to S09E09 "Double Red." Casey's life continues to spiral as his friends worry around him; or what happens when no one notices Casey is struggling and our captain is too stubborn to ask for help. AKA, I enjoyed the ep but needed more angst, h/c, and Brettsey, so I'm fixing it.

Links: ff.net / AO3

Playing basketball with Severide probably wasn't his greatest idea, because by the end of just one round with Stella's new arcade machine, Casey's head is throbbing and the whole room is spinning.

Barely suppressing a grunt, he stumbles backwards until his back hits the column in the middle of their loft. Taking advantage of Stella and Severide being focused on their new furniture, he takes a second to rest his head on the pillar. Eyes sliding closed as he massages his temples, another barely suppressed grunt escaping his lips when he touches the swollen and tender spot on the side of his head. Moving his finger around the area, Casey makes a mental note to take a shower before work the next day as he can still feel the cut from when his head hit the ground and dried blood sticking to his hair around it.

As soon as the machine plays the sound that signals game over, Casey quickly opens his eyes and rights himself. His mask continuing to slip away as his pain continues to increase.

Turning towards the kitchen, Casey does his best to avoid his roommates' stares as their eyes search the place where he had just been standing. He moves quickly to the kitchen, grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge, before he gingerly makes his way to his room.

"Going already?" Severide shouts from the living room.

"Yeah, man. Just tired. So I'll grab a quick nap before beating you again. God knows you need some alone practice," Casey says, trying to get the attention off him, while doing his best to sound convincing and not slur his words.

"Are you okay, captain?" Stella asks carefully, knowing how the boys get when you fuss over them. She is standing a few feet away from her boyfriend and is looking at Casey with clear worry in her eyes. They're all usually tired after a shift but their last one wasn't particularly bad and Casey always likes to take advantage of his days off to do some construction or work around the apartment. And it wasn't even 6pm. Definitely early for Casey to turn in.

"Yeah, yeah. All good. As I said, just tired. I'll see you both later. You guys enjoy yourselves," Casey says, throwing what he hopes is a reassuring wink their way, and making a point to hide the side of his head where blood might be visible.

Stella nods, but she can't shake the feeling that something is off. The previous day's events play on her head and she wonders if the accident did more damage to Casey than everyone thought.

Turning to her boyfriend as soon as Casey's door clicks shut, Stella grabs his shirt and draws Severide to her. "Did Casey seem off to you?" She wonders, not able to stop herself.

"Hmm, honestly? Since that night last fall, he always seems a little off," Severide answers sincerely. Both automatically knowing which night he's referring to.

Thinking back to the last few months, Stella can't help but agree. Remembering how the captain tends to spend his free time on shift closed down in his quarters, and how often he loses his cool and snaps at people now. Not to mention, how little they see of him at home, with Casey spending most of his days off working his construction job or locked inside his room. His occasional trips to Molly's usually ending soon after Brett makes an appearance with Grainger.

"Yeah, you're probably right," Stella concedes eventually. She then grabs the basketball and proceeds to put the ball in the net from where she's standing. "Come here and let me school you. And maybe next time you can actually beat Casey," she teases, picking up the basketball and scoring another point.

Severide mumbles something under his breath but he's smiling to himself as he stares at his girlfriend proudly. He waits until she's done, beating both his and Casey's scores in the process, before he takes her hand and pulls her alongside him towards their bedroom.

-x-x-x-

As soon as the lock clicks shut behind him, Casey slides down the door. The short walk to his room left him winded, and made his headache evolve to include nausea and a ringing in his ears that makes him feel as if his PASS device is active. But unlike in that scenario, there is nothing to turn off now because this sound comes from within, as his skull seemingly threatens to break in two.

Taking a tentative sip of water, Casey stops as his stomach tries to revolt. Closing his eyes, he takes slow, deep breaths willing the nausea to pass so he can drink enough water to down the two pills he managed to grab without Severide or Stella noticing. Now wishing he also had the presence of mind to grab some nausea medication from the kitchen.

After minutes tick by and his symptoms don't ease at all, Casey decides to forgo the water and just down the two pills dry. They scratch his throat but, at this moment, he couldn't care less.

With a groan, he then drags himself through the floor and awkwardly climbs into his bed. Not even bothering to take his clothes off and just collapsing into the mattress. Hopefully a good night's sleep in his own bed is all he needs and he will wake up feeling refreshed and like the last two days had just been a bad dream.

-x-x-x-

He doesn't.

Sleep is elusive all night long. And he spends the whole night tossing and turning because of the pain in his head, and then having to take deep breaths to calm his worsening nausea because of all the tossing and turning.

His awake moments also mix with dreams of cars and sad smiles. Leaving him feeling even more miserable and exhausted than the night before. So much that the last two days do in fact feel like a bad dream, while this night feels like a full-blown nightmare.

-x-x-x-

The following morning, knocking on the door wakes up Casey, and he groans as soon as his eyes land on the clock sitting on his nightstand. He's late for work.

"Case? You alright? We need to leave soon or we're going to be late." Severide's voice comes from outside his room and Casey briefly wonders if it's too late to call in sick. He feels like hell but all things considered he should probably feel thankful he's still alive and that his head is still in one piece. Even if it feels like someone is trying to crack it open from the inside.

"Sorry, man. Just getting ready. Give me a minute," Casey shouts, wincing as his own voice hurts his head. With no time to shower, he just spends a couple minutes getting ready in the bathroom, mostly trying to fix his hair that's sticking up in every direction.

"Let's go," Casey says, stumbling out of his room, and going directly to the front door so his roommates have no time to take in his appearance.

Or so he hoped. "Are you really okay? You look like hell, and you're wearing the same clothes you had yesterday." Severide asks. "And is that blood on the side of your head?"

Looking down at himself, Casey frowns, taking in his wrinkled look, before moving his hand to the spot where he knows the cut is and sighing as he can feel new crusted blood around his hair. He must have reopened the wound with all his tossing and turning the night before. "Didn't have time to do laundry. Will get on that after shift. And why would I have blood? It's probably red paint from my construction job yesterday." Casey settles on the first excuse that comes to mind, hoping they're already so late that Severide won't have time to question him further. "I was working on a barn," he adds as an afterthought, shaking his head and promptly regretting the movement as it intensifies the pounding on his skull.

Severide and Stella look at each other. Both knowing Casey is not the type to neglect his housekeeping duties, and also remembering the captain had actually done laundry last weekend. But, they're both more worried about what looks nothing like red paint and definitely like blood on the side of Casey's head.

Does he really think he can fool a squad lieutenant and firefighter/paramedic/future lieutenant? Stella seems to ask as she shares a look with Severide.

Severide nods, then shrugs and walks to the kitchen, grabbing a styrofoam mug and a plate with toast and eggs. "Here, we left some breakfast for you. You can eat in the car."

Casey's stomach does a backflip at the sight of the food and he has to use a lot of his remaining energy just to push his nausea down. "Thanks, man. But not really hungry. I will just take the coffee," he says casually, trying to sound normal.

Severide and Stella share another knowing look, but both decide to let it go for now, instead Severide sets the plate on the fridge and passes the cup to Casey. Then everyone grabs their keys and bags and they're out the door.

For a moment, Severide worries that maybe he's imagining things and Casey is totally fine. But looking at Stella out of the corner of his eye, noticing his own worry reflected in her brown eyes, he decides to trust his intuition and ask her about it later. He has been Casey's best friend for a long time and he knows they need to tread carefully when it comes to the man sharing his feelings and opening up about what's ailing him. Because something clearly is.

For his part, Casey is barely able to follow Severide and Stella down the stairs and towards the parking lot, and in his struggle, has the sudden, very obvious realization that he shouldn't work like this. All his energy is going into just taking one step after the other and he's in no condition to be anyone's captain today. But he made it this far so he can at least make it home. Once he's there, he can just tell Chief Boden he's not feeling well and spend the day out of the field and doing paperwork. It would be good for Stella too. She can be truck lieutenant and get some more preparation for her upcoming exams.

With that decision made, Casey then spends the next half hour sitting quietly in the backseat of Severide's car. The cup of coffee getting cold in his hand after his first tentative sip was received with his body threatening to throw up. What exactly, he wouldn't know, given he had skipped both lunch and dinner the day before.

When Severide parks his car in the street in front of Firehouse 51, Casey takes a second to close his eyes and compose himself, then slowly gets out of the car and makes his way inside. Not sparing his roommates a single glance.

Ignoring everyone who is already in the common room, Casey walks directly to the bathroom and closes himself inside a stall. After taking a minute to make sure there's no one inside, he finally lets go and proceeds to try to throw up the emptiness in his stomach. With nothing to come out, Casey just coughs and dry heaves. By the time he's done, he is sweating and shaking. And not for the first time realizes he's in no condition to go out into the job. Matt Casey has never been particularly good at self-preservation but he is the best at protecting the lives of the firefighters and paramedics under his command, and he would never willingly put their lives in danger.

Moving to the sink, Casey washes his face and mouth, before reaching inside the stall for his discarded bag and taking off his now sweat soaked t-shirt and changing into his white captain's shirt. He spends the next five minutes carefully scrubbing the blood that's matting his hair, before he arranges it in such a way that it covers the cut on his left side. Then taking deep, calming breaths, he schools his features and exits the bathroom.

As soon as he turns the corner towards Chief Boden's office, Casey collides with Severide and he can't help the grunt that escapes his lips. "Here you are. I've been looking for you. Case, are you sure you're okay?" Severide asks, concern evident in every single one of his words.

"Yes, man. Stop worrying. You're acting worse than Stella last time you got hurt," Casey says, as the previous day, trying to take the attention off him and direct it back to his roommate.

Severide says nothing, but looks at his best friend intently. Easily noticing how tired he looks and how the dark circles under his eyes are even more pronounced than anytime in the last few months. His skin also looks flushed, cheeks reddish, and he keeps squinting at him. Casey hasn't particularly looked good since his failed night with Brett, but he looks like shit now. But before Severide can steel his resolve and call him out, Casey seems to dismiss him with a shake of his hand and continues on his way.

"Going to speak with Chief Boden, I will see you later," Casey offers, then he is gone.

-x-x-x-

"Casey, good morning. What can I do for you?" Chief Boden asks from his desk, signaling for Casey to close the door and sit down.

"Hi Chief, I wanted to request the day off," Casey begins, but stops at the shocked look on his chief's face and the sudden way his eyebrows go up. Casey knew it was uncommon for him to voluntarily request time off but he wasn't expecting his chief to look so surprised. "Must have eaten something bad yesterday because my stomach is not agreeing with me today," he lies, inwardly wincing.

Matt Casey never lies, but sometimes he likes to color the truth. After all, his stomach is really not agreeing with him. And, as if trying to add more truth to his statement, Casey's stomach does another flip.

"Alright, Casey. I will tell Stella to take command of truck for the day and you go home and rest. Let me know if I can do anything to help," Boden agrees easily. A small seed of worry settling deep inside him because his captain rarely takes himself off the lineup voluntarily. But if he says it's just a bad case of spoiled food, there's nothing he can do and they just need to let time do its magic.

"Thank you, sir. But, if you're okay with it, I'd prefer to stay here. I can just lie down in my quarters for a bit, then take advantage of the time to get ahead on some paperwork," Casey proposes, knowing his situation is a lot more complicated than food poisoning. He doesn't want to go to the hospital as he fears this might be the time the doctor mentioned where another head injury could really put a damper on his career as a firefighter. And even if he hopes that this will all resolve on its own with time, he would still like to be close to an ambulance and paramedics in case it all turns worse before it gets better.

As it turns out, he does have some sense of self-preservation after all.

"Whatever you think is best, Casey. But if you're feeling worse, don't hesitate to go home. Or ask Brett or Mackey to check you out. They can give you something to make you feel better," Boden instructs. Like always being the type of leader that likes to point out what he believes to be the right path, but ultimately, wanting to give the men and women under his command the chance to decide for themselves.

Casey nods, even knowing that Brett is the last person he would ask for help right now. He almost did yesterday, then spent the whole night dreaming with her sad eyes when he had broken her heart. Being honest with himself, he knows he wants nothing more than to talk to her and let her comfort him. But he has done enough damage already; now she wants space, and the least he can do is give that to her.

"Thank you, chief." Casey bids his boss farewell before he walks straight to his quarters. Closing the door and lowering the blinds, then promptly falling face first onto his bed.

Five minutes later the alarms go off, calling all five units to a vehicular accident. The alarms and sirens only intensify the throbbing in Casey's head and a sob escapes his lips as he tries to shield himself from the noise by covering his head with his pillow. When the room is back to silence, he sighs in content, glad he doesn't have to get up and worry about being Captain Casey right now. At this moment, he has more than enough just worrying about how he feels like he is dying.

Barely shaking his head, Casey wills those thoughts away from his mind and closes his eyes. With the whole firehouse out on a call, he can finally get some rest and hopefully this time actually wake up feeling better than before.

-x-x-x-

After Casey more than dismisses him and walks to the Chief's office, closing the door behind them, Severide has the familiar need to follow him and find out what's going on. But he doesn't want to get on his friend's bad side, so instead, he follows the path where Casey came from, and decides to find some clues on his own.

Seeing the locker room empty and intact, Severide walks into the bathroom and quickly notices the discarded cup of coffee on the trash. The entirety of the black liquid spilled on the bag. Sighing, Severide decides to go wait for Casey outside of Boden's office so he can talk to him about it. Something is clearly wrong with him, and Severide needs to do something about it before Casey's stupidity lands him in trouble. Severide knows he's not great at taking care of himself, but some days he thinks Casey is even worse.

Getting to Boden's office, Severide finds the door open and the chief alone working on some paperwork. Briefly considering talking to Boden about it, Severide eventually decides he doesn't want to go over Casey's head, so he turns around and walks to the officer's quarters.

From a distance, Severide can already see that Casey's door is closed and the blinds are down, so he's probably inside, but before he has time to knock on the door the alarms go off as they're all called to an accident downtown. Staying in place for a few seconds, Severide waits to see if Casey will come out so he can make sure he's really okay before they go into a scene. But there's no movement inside, and Casey never comes out.

Hearing the engines of the trucks, Severide shakes his head and runs towards the apparatus bay, coming face to face with Boden as soon as he exits the door.

Seeing all of truck, but Casey, sitting at their usual spots, and the seat next to Stella empty, Severide turns to his chief. "Sir, is Casey alright?" Casey can get pissed off if he wants, Severide thinks. After all, he wouldn't need to be asking their boss if the idiot had just opened up to his best friend and roommate, instead of avoiding all his questions.

"He said he has food poisoning, and requested the day off. Stella, you're in charge of truck today," Boden all but shouts, both answering Severide's question and informing the rest of the house that they will be going to work without their captain today.

Food poisoning? Severide wonders, scrunching his face when he remembers he hadn't seen Casey eat anything since the day before yesterday. Something is clearly up and he will find out as soon as they're back from this call.

Nodding, Severide jumps into the squad truck and turns on the sirens as Cruz hits the gas. For a brief moment, as he passes the apparatus floor, he catches Stella's eyes, and again, sees his own worry reflected in them. They briefly spoke when they got to the firehouse, and even though Stella also felt something was off, they both agreed this might all be in their heads and was just another side-effect of Casey's current distance from Brett. Still, they can't help but worry. And if that wasn't enough, Severide then turns to Brett, who's sitting on the driver's side of ambo 61, and sees an unasked question on her gaze, her face also showing concern.

-x-x-x-

Sylvie Brett prides herself on always being ready to do her job and help whoever is in need. Or rather, almost always. Because a certain fire captain has the uncanny ability to draw her thoughts away from the job and towards his beautiful blue eyes and deep gaze. Even when the man is not even in the same space, her mind is an expert in conjuring his face whether she wants to or not.

So now, even as she exits the ambulance and goes to the back to find her med bag, Brett tries to catch Severide or Stella's eyes. At any other time, they would be the ones seeking answers from her, but nowadays, she knows Casey is much more likely to share personal details with his roommates than with her. It's not the first time she has that thought, and as every time before, a sad smile escapes her lips with the realization.

Brett can't deny that she is in love with Casey and wants to be more than friends with him, but mostly, she just misses her best friend. And wishes things would go back to normal, when they would communicate like no other, and share with each other what neither dared share with the rest of the world. That's how she knew that whatever was happening now, wouldn't be happening at all if she hadn't sought Casey that night. Then she wouldn't have asked that question, and he wouldn't have broken her heart with the power of his honesty alone.

Shaking her head, Brett gives up trying to attract Severide or Stella's attention and instead focuses on the current call. Grabbing every instrument and item she might need, she follows Mackey to the accident, and together they stand to the side, while squad works on getting the victims out of the three cars involved in the crash, and truck, minus Casey (as her mind helpfully points out), works on extinguishing the few flames that had already sparked and making sure no others join.

When that's done, Brett and Mackey do quick work of taking care of the victims and getting them stable while they wait for additional ambulances to come and help them transport the victims to Gaffney Chicago Medical Center. Only for that brief moment she forgets about Casey, taking some time to stare at the young paramedic, her partner for two more shifts, as she ponders why another partner is leaving her. Maybe she's a good paramedic, and just not a good leader? Because there has to be some reason why no partner is able to stick with her for more than 2 years, while the previous Ambo's 61 PIC was able to spend years with just Shay and then Brett. Apparently Casey is not the only one who prefers Dawson.

Sirens getting closer draw Brett away from her own pity party and she joins Mackey in letting the new paramedics know the state of the victims they just treated and helping them get everyone inside an ambulance. As she proudly stares at Mackey, hearing her confidently recite all the patients' stats and known injuries, Brett makes it a point to remember to congratulate the young woman again and wish her good luck in her new house.

That thought also makes Brett realize that even in a very small way, she's still a part of Mackey's success and the fact she so quickly got the recognition she deserved by being considered for a future PIC job, an achievement which took Brett more than a few years. She should feel proud of that, for both of them. Plus, she's always been good, some would even say great, at her job. So there's no reason for Brett to be feeling down on herself.

But then she remembers Casey, and her conviction crumbles. Whatever is happening to him now wouldn't be happening if she hadn't let their personal lives mix with their jobs. And even if it is just food poisoning, which she doubts, it would still be her fault, because any firefighter should feel like they can reach out and ask her for help, however minor the injury or illness might be. And Casey clearly hadn't thought he could. But then again, he had tried to ask her a question during the last shift. It hadn't been her fault that, as usual, they got interrupted, but it was her fault not to ask him about it later.

Same as it was her fault that she didn't check Casey after the incident last call. And deep down in her gut, she is certain that is the real problem of whatever is happening to him now.

Sighing, Brett forces her mind to return to the present and closes the door of Ambo 61 after Mackey climbs inside next to the stretcher. For now, she will focus on doing her job to the best of her ability, but she knows something is up, and she will find out what, as soon as they're back at 51.

-x-x-x-

Again, Casey doesn't wake up feeling better than before. In fact, the pain in his head now reaches a new level of misery and the room is spinning so much that just getting out of bed is a struggle.

Closing his eyes, Casey pictures what he remembers of his small quarters and tentatively makes his way to the door. Resting his head on the wood as he wills the world to stop moving.

Opening his eyes again, he unlocks the door and slowly makes his way to the common room in search of Brett, Mackey or anyone that can help him. But the room is empty and with a sinking feeling he realizes the call lasted longer than expected or maybe he just didn't sleep all that much.

But then Casey hears the telltale sound of the firehouse's units and his friends' voices and with the last of his energy follows the noise to the apparatus bay. Every step is a new challenge and by the time Casey crosses the threshold and stands on the garage, the ache in his head has worsened. He moves a hand to message his temple, hoping to alleviate the ache in his head and frowns when his fingers come back sticky with blood.

When the trucks and SUV are close enough for Casey to see them, or rather, their blurry outlines, he raises his hand, hoping to get Brett or Severide's attention, and in his disorientation, frowns again when he sees blood staining his hand. Wanting to get closer to his family and the only people that can help him now, Casey takes one final step but it's too late and his whole world collapses on him. His dizziness and nausea take over, the room around him disappearing as the blurriness gives way to full-blown darkness and the familiar sounds of the firehouse are reduced to interminable silence.

And before Casey can process anything of what's happening, the world seems to tilt off its axis and he feels himself falling...

#Chicago Fire #matt casey #sylvie brett #brettsey #kelly severide #brett x casey #bad things happen bingo #chicago fire fanfic

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twdmusicboxmystery · 4 years ago

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10x22: Here’s Negan - Details

All right. Here are a LOT of details.

***As always, spoilers abound below for 10x22. Don’t read until you’ve watched!***

We start with Maggie and Hershel walking around Alexandria early in the morning. She calls him “a little rat” affectionately, which I’m side eying. Because of Carol’s rat last episode and because we already established parallels between Hershel and Beth from ep 17 in that he went missing and Maggie and Daryl searched for him.

Then they sing “you are my sunshine” together, which is the same song Carl sang Negan. Because the sun is a Beth symbol, we’ve always seen her in that song. I also wonder if it foreshadows Maggie losing Hershel in some way. I don’t mean him dying, but rather being kidnapped. A lot of us have thought about one or some of the kids being taken at some point, and their parents having to search for them.

Carol looks out a broken window (Broken Glass Theory) and sees the exchange. So, she leaves Alexandria and takes Negan with her.

Actually, the next thing we see is a dead rabbit she pulls from a snare. The rabbit is SUPER interesting. I answered an Ask HERE about the moon rabbit, and I really love this explanation of the symbol. It makes perfect sense for Beth because the moon rabbit sacrificed itself, which is exactly what Father Gabriel said cryptically in 5x16. “How you sacrificed one of your own….”

Plus the Moon rabbit is resurrected and combines the moon symbol and the rabbit symbol.

So what does it mean in this context?

Well, I still don’t want to go into too much detail, though I will soon. (I promise.) But if rabbit = Beth, I think this is yet another example of symbolism that points to Negan and Beth having a big arc together later. (And Carol will probably be thrown into the mix.)

That evening, Negan drinks by the fire. What he’s drinking is clearly moonshine. It’s from one of those big glass moonshine bottles. I don’t know where he got it. I looked a second time at the stuff they left for him, and it might be in there, but if so, it isn’t visible. It would certainly be interesting if Daryl left him moonshine, but I don’t see any super-obvious hint at that. If it’s already there in the cabin, well, that’s Leah’s cabin, so….

This is where he sees his old self from the trailer. Some of the dialogue jumps out at me as things Daryl might say about himself. Evil Negan says to his good self, “You are nothing without her.” That sort of thing.

The next day he goes back to the tree with the stained-glass windows where Rick cut his throat. One of the plate glass windows has a hole in it and the other one is lying on the ground.

My go-to explanation of course is that the one with the hole represents the bullet hole in Beth’s head. (We actually said this of the stained-glass window in Father Gabriel’s church that Sasha shoots a hole in in 5x16 as well.) And I always see someone falling down as a serious injury. So, when Beth belly-flopped in the elevator shaft with Noah, that was a foreshadow of her getting shot. So I’m kind of seeing the window lying flat on the ground in the same way.

Of course, Negan digs up Lucille, and then it goes into the flashbacks.

It starts of course with him being a prisoner of the biker gang. We do think this gang is a parallel of the Claimers from S4. Remember that I said, overall, Negan = Daryl, right? So, this guy (Craven) even kind of looks like Joe Claimer. They dress in a similar fashion, are rough-and-tumble kind of dudes. But also, Negan runs into them after he loses Lucille. He doesn’t realize she’s died at that point, but she has. Just like Daryl ran into the Claimers after being separated from Beth in Alone.

And we immediately see a blue cooler with IV bags inside. They’re Lucille’s chemo treatments. So blue cooler/Frosty Cola symbolism. Plus this can parallel to 6x06 when Daryl accidentally took off with Tina’s medicine when he met Dwight. Basically, these are both pointing to the same thing: a future arc involving Daryl and Beth. There are also 22s on the IV bags. So, 22 theory.

I will say that the format of this episode is a lot like 10x18 because so much of it is flashback. They even use the same font to show the time jumps. The main difference is that with Daryl, they started 5 years ago and then jumped forward, toward the present. Here, they actually move backward first and then forward again.

So it’s like a swinging pendulum. They go back 12 years to where he’s a prisoner of the bikers. Then it goes back 6 weeks to when he’s with Lucille in their home , and then it jumps back again to before the apocalypse when she first found out she had cancer, which was right about the time the turn happened. And then it moves forward to the two of them together in the house, and then back to him with the bikers.

Okay, so, “12 Years Ago” he’s telling his story to the bikers.

Then it actually says “Two or Three Days Ago” and it’s odd to me that they don’t specify which one it is. Negan says he found the mobile medical clinic 2 or 3 days ago, but there’s got to be a reason they don’t just go with one or the other. Anyway, this is when he found an RV with supplies. He tries to hold the doctor up and Laura (Savior) comes up behind him with a bat and hits him.

We also get a bit of a hallucination theme. When Negan looks at the RV and the dummy guards on the roof, his sight sort of warps in and out like he can’t tell for sure. When he wakes up, he’s also hooked to an IV. (Parallel to Beth at Grady.) The doctor says he was dehydrated, malnourished, and exhausted. So maybe, in addition to all the mental break stuff we’ve already said about Daryl in 10x18, we should add these to the list.

“Six Weeks Earlier” and it shows him and Lucille. The first thing we see is that she tells him he’ll have to kill the walker but he doesn’t want to. He just turns off the generator, hoping it will go.

So, she makes him read Pride and Prejudice to her. The Pride and Prejudice thing is really interesting. He only reads a line or two, but anyone familiar with the story will be able to pick out the scene. Basically, in the story, a man asks Lizzie to marry him and she rejects him. He doesn’t love her or anything. He’s just looking for a “suitable” wife, and she can’t stand him. After she rejects him, her best friend marries him instead. And this friend doesn’t care that it’s not a love match. She just wants to be settled in life.

So the scene Negan reads part of is where the friend, Charlotte, is coming to tell Lizzie that she’s marrying him instead. This is the part Negan reads:

"I see what you are feeling," replied Charlotte. "You must be surprised, very much surprised--so lately as Mr. Collins was wishing to marry you. But when you have had time to think it over…”

Here’s the thing. No way they’re putting dialogue from such a well-known book like this into the show without reason. And I know they said on TTD that it’s supposed to be an Easter Egg for Pride and Prejudice and Zombies. Fair enough, but it’s not enough of an explanation for me. In the past, there have been things Nicotero has labelled as homages to various horror films, and I’m sure that’s true, but they’re also clearly Beth symbolism.

So, you could say that Pride and Prejudice and Zombies applies to Negan and Lucille. It’s a true love story, but zombies are thrown in. That works. But why this particular passage? It’s about NOT marrying for love, or the passing of a man’s offer of marriage from one woman to another. None of that applies to Negan and Lucille. It would have made more sense to have him read a different passage between Lizzie and Darcy, you know?

So, what does this mean? We’re not entirely sure, yet. For me, I tend to think it foreshadows a future arc (I’m sure you’re shocked) and I’ll get more into that in the next few days.

@wdway suggested perhaps we could apply it to the Leah situation. Daryl is in love with one woman, but hallucinating a relationship with another. I think that works, too. For now, let’s just keep it in mind, shall we? ;D

Dialogue parallels include Lucille saying, “we’ll have to kill it,” which parallels Beth saying the same thing about the walker at the moonshine shack.

And of course then we get that all important scene with the green wig, “serious” mention, IV stand and bag, and walker in the eye.

We see Negan going out to look for more gas for the generator, siphoning it out of cars.

We also see them having fun together. Obviously them playing darts is a callback to Still. The part where they play darts is actually just like half a second in the show, which just goes to show that they did the promo shot because they wanted us to see the symbols in the scene. I want to draw everyone’s attention to the fact that the British flag is printed on the darts. This is part of the template I’ll talk about in a day or two as well. For now, I just want you to notice it. It’s important.

When they do the candlelight dinner (*coughs alone*) they eat DOG food. Sirius reference. She suddenly says “happy anniversary” and pulls out a present for him. He says, “You know what day it is?” and she says, “no, I just wanted you to have this.” So I think the idea is that it’s not really their anniversary. She just said that as an excuse to give him a present. It reminded me a little of the “New Years Eve” theme we saw around the Claimers. Not exactly the same, but a similar vibe. It’s not REALLY New Year’s Eve. They’re just saying it as an excuse to do something else (in that case, kill Rick). Here, it’s not really their anniversary, but Lucille is saying that as an excuse to give him the jacket.

When Negan says she doesn’t owe him anything Lucille says, “I stuck with you because I could always see the man you are right now, even when you weren’t.” So again, kind of a Beth theme of seeing the best in him even when he doesn’t see it in himself. That’s a huge theme throughout this episode.

There’s more refrigerator/cooler symbolism when the fridge defrosts, ruining the last of Lucille’s treatments.

Then it jumps back to before the apocalypse. There were some symbols here as well. The main ones I noticed were specifically around Lucille. After her diagnosis, she gets in the car and hears the broadcast about the virus victims eating human flesh. Kind of a callback to hearing the Terminus broadcast in 4a.

Then she gets mad and says, just play some g**d*** music. (Music reference.) When the car pulls out, you have to check out this license plate!

XVD-1144. The 1-1 you should recognize from @frangipanilove’s 1-1 posts. The 44 references the comic book issue where Andrea was shot in the head, and survived. And of course there’s the X. So then @wdway had the ingenious idea to ask what roman numerals X and D stood for. X=5 and D=500. So we basically have “X, 550, 1-1, 44.” Yeah, series number 55 was Slabtown. Beth was on the 5th floor. And all the rooms around them in the hallway at Grady were in the 550s. If that’s not proof that Lucille is a Beth proxy, I don’t know what is.

Plus, notice the type of car: mustang. We’ve talked about this before, but horse symbolism, and the type of car is always important.

Another thing @wdway with her eagle eyes picked up. Lucille is scrolling back and forth between Negan and Janine’s numbers, right? Notice the date:

November 12. Recognize that:

Yeah, not kidding. It’s a reference to the headstone in Alone. 👀

Back in the future again, Lucille asks Negan to stay with her. You don’t realize this the first time watching it, but clearly she’s ready to die, and just wants him to be with her, but he’s bound and determined to save her, an goes anyway.

A couple of things to point out. Negan looking for meds parallels to Daryl looking for meds at the veterinary college in 4a. Also, on TTD they pointed out that Negan is constantly putting Lucille in a position to be alone. Before the apocalypse, he left her alone to fool around with another woman, who was her best friend. He made her go to the doctor alone. (Lucille alone at the hospital could = Beth at Grady.) We see him constantly leaving her here to get supplies. And he leaves for like 6 six weeks to track the mobile clinic.

I think that’s mostly an anti-parallel to Daryl. Daryl never left Beth intentionally. But I also think it could be a future theme, not in the sense that Daryl will leave her, but I’ve always thought he would feel super guilty because they left her behind and now she’s been “alone” for 8 years. And again, not physically alone as we know she’ll be part of other groups and such, but without him and her family.

Back with the medical people again, Laura gives Negan her bat, the one she first beaned him with, since he doesn’t have any other weapons.

All they said about Laura on TTD was that they wanted to use her—someone the audience would recognize—but also someone who had a relatively minor role. So they talked about how they could have brought Austin Amelio on and had Dwight give it to him, but because Dwight is a bigger character, and because his onscreen relationship with Negan was much bigger, it would have made it a Negan/Dwight moment and they wanted to keep this episode focused solely on Negan and Lucille. So they used Laura.

And sure, that’s fine. But they could have used any Savior they wanted. And why did they even WANT a familiar face? Why the return of the Savior with the blond hair, you know? I’m just saying. ;D

Of course Negan tells the biker gang where the medical RV is and then goes back to Lucille, but she’s already dead. This really was a very tragic episode.

We obviously have a suicide theme here, and the fact that Negan never actually shoots or stabs Lucille in the head, both of which parallel Beth.

On TTD, YNB even pointed out that she’s wearing the same clothes as she was the day he left, which means she committed suicide the day he left. Most of the 6 weeks he’s been out looking for medical supplies, she was already dead. Super tragic, no?

We also see keys, matches, the blue cooler again, and Negan wrapping the barbed wire around his bat.

So, a couple of preliminary thoughts here. The 6 weeks was bugging me because they said it 2 or 3 times, really emphasizing it. I’m kind of wanting to equate it to 6 seasons. Because if Beth doesn’t show until S11 (and clearly now she can’t, unless she shows in Fear or something, but I’m not holding my breath for that) then it will be 6 seasons since Beth left the show.

And again, it’s more anti-parallel than parallel. For 6 weeks, Negan thought Lucille was alive, but she was dead the entire time. For 6 seasons, Daryl thought Beth was dead, when really she’s been alive the whole time.

And, of course, Negan burns the house down, much like Beth and Daryl did in Still.

But here’s the other thing @wdway noticed. Check out the similarities here:

Similar colors and structures, and both seem to be on fire at some point. And I don’t think the cabin in 5x09 was pointing toward Negan and Lucille. Rather, I think the symbolism in both instances point toward something we haven’t seen, yet. But the parallels and repeated symbolism are there.

When Negan leaves, he gets on his bike with Lucille (the bat) and drives away from the burning house. And interestingly, we see him smack his mailbox with it and knock it off it’s post.

Couple of things here:

The name “Smith” is written on the mailbox, so apparently that was their last name. And they mentioned it on TTD. Smith is such an everyman sort of name. It might be one of the most common surnames on the planet, so there’s definitely some interesting symbolism there having to do with Negan.

But I’m side-eyeing the actual mailbox, as part of the Communication Theme. And, on a very basic level, I’m thinking that the mailbox was intact when Lucille was still alive. He destroyed it after he lost her. So maybe it represents something along those lines, or even represents the person they lost. So mailbox = Beth.

The scene that keeps flashing in my head is from 6x03 when Daryl is riding around on his bike, searching for Rick, and he’s passing all these mailboxes in the background.

Then in 10x21, we see him walking toward the military walker on the train tracks (*coughs CRM, *coughs Rick*) and he passes the blond, Beth walker, but doesn’t actually look at her or see her. Do you kind of see the similar theme there?

Negan brutally killing the biker gang can parallel Rick doing the same to Joe Claimer in 4x16.

Negan tells Craven a story about how he lost his job. He got in a bar fight. It was their favorite because it had a JUKE BOX. And they loved the juke box because it played their favorite song (You are So Beautiful to Me.) He even talks about “seeing red” and how he now realizes he can do anything he wants (read: kill anyone he wants) so we kind of see his evolution into S6 Negan here.

And honestly, they leave a lot of loose threads here. We never learn what happens to Franklin (he’s still alive at this point) and obviously Laura stays with Negan long term, but they really could do more flashbacks about how he started gathering people and found the Sanctuary.

So then we come back to the present where he’s just dug Lucille up under the stained glass window tree. In the first scene at the beginning, we see a walker making its way toward him. Yes, it’s a blond, female walker, and I’m pretty sure she’s wearing Daryl’s shirt from when he was at the Sanctuary. Here at the end, Negan has been lost in his own thoughts so long, the walker comes up behind him and he turns around and kills it with Lucille.

When he does, the bat splits down the middle. Yet another symbol of Lucille’s death.

He goes back to the cabin and sits in front of the fire and talks to Lucille (both the bat and his actual wife). He says, “I’m sorry I left you…I made myself not feel anything…I miss you.” See how we could apply that to Daryl?

He also says, “I’m going to do your fighting for you,” which I take to mean he’ll honor her memory better, now, rather than go back to the old, evil Negan he was. Which was really just years of him avoiding his feelings about her death. (Kind of like Daryl has with Beth, hence the Leah situation.)

Then he covers the bat in a white cloth (clearly meant to be a shroud) and puts the bat in the fireplace, burning it. On TTD, they do say this is meant to be the funeral she never got. 👀

Oh, and at the end of the “in memoriam” on TTD, it actually says, “Negan is burning down his past.”

So, at the very end, he actually goes back to Alexandria. Maggie, Carol, and Daryl are near the entrance and he asks where the “A” team is going. Carol warns Negan that if he lives at Alexandria, Maggie will kill him at some point. I actually really liked this ending. It was a good way to kick us into S11.

That’s the end of the episode. So, I’ll say this again and it will be a good segue into my next post about what I think Beth’s arc will be in S11, and how she’ll appear. I’ll post it either tomorrow or Thursday.

Without getting too much into the weeds, I think Negan and Beth will have some major, future interaction. And I really think the symbolism here backs it up, for various reasons. The symbolism itself wouldn’t prove anything, as we’ve seen this stuff repeated with lots of different characters and especially true love couples, which Negan and Lucille clearly were, despite his cheating.

But on TTD, Hilarie Burton talked about how strong Lucille was. She said she liked the character because so often when cancer victims or victims of other prolonged diseases are portrayed on film, they’re seen as angelic, ethereal beings. And while that’s fine if that’s truly who they are, you don’t lose your personality just because you become sick. So she liked it that Lucille was a little rough around the edges. She says that even before the apocalypse, Negan was just fussy enough that he would need a strong woman to rein him in, and he would also be attracted to exactly this kind of strong woman.

Strong woman = Beth.

So, I’ll just leave it there.

Anyone find any symbols I missed?

#beth greene #beth greene lives #beth is alive #beth is coming #td theory #td theories #team delusional #team defiance #beth is almost here #bethyl

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hightownquccn · 3 years ago

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THE MUN WATCHES. Hawkeye Ep5.-Ep6.

That’s it. Sharon is adopting Yelena as her little sister to honor Nat. Her sarcasm makes Sharon so proud.

So many feelings from this show.

I am so happy to see everyone on this show. It might not be perfect but it is what I needed. It’s time to go reread all my Hawkeye comics. Which I’m pretty sure I read in the last few months but so much has happened I don’t remember things. lol

Oh noooo. It’s mummy. Of course it is. Called it.

Also I was totally looking at spoilers for episode 6 or rather that watch everyone has been after. I saw a rumor that is going to piss me off just as much as them making AoS non-canon. which is SUCH BULLSHIT. Are they really going to have Laura turn out to be Bobbi or something?? Because I fuckin loved Bobbi on AoS. I just don’t understand why they had it canon with the movies what with Hydra’s reveal and then suddenly retconned the whole series.

Ep 6.

So mama’s the bad person. Sucks for Kate. BONDING MOMENTS FOR HER AND HAWK!DAD. I am so here for this.

Aww. Kate made her little speech about seeing Hawkeye and not being scared and wanting to be a hero. My dad was walking by and just went ‘yeah. they die’ in reference to normal humans.

Yelena arriving in a NOICE green coat. I want it.

LFMAO. Hawkeye getting shot at and Yelena just gives him a ‘really? can you not go anywhere without something like this happening?’

I hope Kate makes Yelena feel how Yelena probably made Natasha feel.

That outfit reveal was so fucking cute. And the button pressing. THESE FUCKING BBIES ARE PRECIOUS.

Sharon totally runs into everyone after this party and is just like ‘.....what the actual hell Barton.’

These two are such sisters. I love it. They both need some family to keep them on their toes.

....STOP MAKING ME LIKE JACK.

Also, STOP BEING SO DAMN ATTACTIVE CLINT WTF. Takin off his tie like that with an open collar. Just me or does he make you want to say daddy. ( WHAT IS WITH SHARON AND OLDER MEN IN MY HEAD NOW???? I can not think of A SINGLE way that Sharon and Clint would ever be together - I don’t think they would even go well together?? But now I’m just laughing at her finding him attractive. Not sure if it is the looks or the good!parent. )

Bhahahaha

‘Kate where’s our backup?’ *LARPers walk out* ‘hahaha...we’re all gonna die.’

‘.....timbeerrrrrrr’

Such fight sequences! Clint and Yelena talking about Tashaaaaa

IS THIS WHAT HEROES DO. ARREST THEIR MOTHER’S ON CHRISTMAS

IT IS IF THEIR MOTHER KILLED SOMEONE. FUCK OFF. Don’t you dare make her feel bad.

The whistle :(

Clint giving Yelena what she needed. Just. *chef’s kiss*

God. I will never forgive the MCU for killing Nat off for literally no actual reason. It was pointless.

okay. they definitely are making his wife Bobbi. There is no way she isn’t. That shit said ‘19′.

Like I don’t *HATE* Bobbi. I love her. I just thought we already had her. I don’t see why they had to recast and rewrite the character when she already was a thing. I don’t care of AoS isn’t canon anymore. We had her. And I am still mad that Hawkeye has a fam. Not that I want female characters to be fridged for manpain but he didn’t have a family in the comics like ever. they were already gone. It just feels like they added it to keep a ship from happening. It felt like cheap writing to me. Ignore me and my anti-brutasha feels.

OMG IS THAT FUCKING ADAM PASCAL. ARE YOU FUCKIN KIDDING ME. I WOULD KNOW THAT POWERFUL VOICE ANYWHERE. Who is he supposed to be in this musical!? Coulson??? LMFAO. Just a random NYer?

*snort* they snuck in the word Rent while singing this NY song. I see you.

Fucking AntMan. GTFO of this musical. YOU WEREN’T THERE.

I will not stop laughing at Adam Pascal having been in this miniseries even for 2 minutes.

#◜ ❝ what the actual f$*@ ❞ ◞ // MUN COMMENTARY.

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dogcopter · 5 years ago

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Jane is Lore 2020

Ok, here’s the round up of the ghost part of the situation with @keepbeachcitysafe and @keepbeachcityweird.

Theory: Ronaldo’s girlfriend Jane is the key to figuring out Rose Quartz is not gone, largely via a constellation of background clues. If that sounds ridiculous, I understand. I’m Ronaldo. Actually I’m not Ronaldo, but hopefully I’ll have a post about him too soon. I hope we can all have fun together tho

This post is very, very long and involves a lot of images. It will be confusing at first, but please entertain the thought and keep reading, and I hope it clicks into place. I may need to update it later.

Three sections for supporting evidence:

1. Restaurant Wars, Jane, KBCW/KBCS blogs’ interaction & contents

2. Astral projection/ghosts/fusions

3. Dogcopter secrets

Restaurant Wars Saga & Jane’s appearances

So Ronaldo has a blog at @keepbeachcityweird - he also published a book based on his blog called Keep Beach City Weird: You Can’t Hide the Truth!!!, which is available for purchase.

On April 23, 2014, Lion 2: The Movie airs. Jane appears for the first time working the ticket booth at the movie theater and sees Lion and the kids fight a killer robot. Dogcopter 3 is playing at the theater.

April 23, 2014, Ronaldo at Keep Beach City Weird also posts about seeing Dogcopter 3 at the movie theater, where the parking lot is a mess, presumably from Steven, Connie and Lion’s robot training fight.

He mentions “First of all, it’s a huge mistake to turn the last Dogcopter book into THREE movies.”, but that’s less relevant to this particular post. The important thing is that he, like Connie, follows Dogcopter, who’s also associated with Jane. (We’ll get to Dogcopter’s appearances in SU in the last part of this once the context is established)

Ronaldo’s posts in general document specific events and details in his home Beach City, but that’s another post entirely.

Exactly a year later, Ronaldo on April 23, 2015 posted about receiving a mysterious letter, which might be from Jane because (beneath a great deal of smudging) it appears to call Ronaldo the CUTEST GUY EVER! (This isn’t crucial or anything, just noting it as one of our first Jane points).

I GOT A LETTER TODAY!!! But for some reason it was all wet and I can’t even tell what it says. Is it a love letter? Is it a death threat? Please tell me! I need to know if I should lock my doors or open my heart!

Jane also appears in Beach City Drift. After Beach City Drift, keepbeachcitysafe posts an episode reaction blog, on July 22 2016, and takes special notice of Jane.

Hey did you guys notice that girl that keeps appear. We saw her when Steven took Connie to the movies and now she’s here. I wonder if she’s involved in something. Hmmmm. So Stevonnie raced Kevin down the hill in his Himitsu X12, that’s secret in Japanese.

(Kevin’s Himitsu X12 is his car, in the middle there. We’ll come back to this and what KBCS means in a second.)

July 25 2016, Restaurant Wars airs, the third of Jane’s four appearances in SU. In this ep, Jane comes a long way to return Ronaldo’s Koala Princess DVDs, and catches Ronaldo with Kiki and is upset.

KBCS posts another episode reaction blog, pays attention to Jane again, and says they plan to message Ronaldo.

Ronaldo says he can’t do it because of his girlfriend. Ooo, he has a girlfriend, that’s pretty cool, you just know whats gonna happen next.

Ok so, Ronaldo’s, GIRLFRIEND, (imagine me saying that in slow motion) showed up at the worst possible moment.

Everything was back to normal. Except poor Ronaldo, I should sent him a letter to cheer him up. Seen ya next week.

Almost immediately the KBCS and KBCW blogs play out a little interaction online:

Ronaldo goes through some stuff.

No post today. If anyone needs me I’ll be at Brooding Hill… where I’ll be CRYING. I usually cry at Crying Canyon, but it’s closed right because of some flash flood warnings.

Then Ronaldo posts KBCS’s letter.

Note how KBCW caps this message so the name is clearly visible? It’s referring to Ronaldo’s bio:

It’s not very cheering...but things work out shortly thereafter. Jane likes one of Ronaldo’s posts and all seems well.

I think it’s going to work out you guys. Thanks for all your support.

After this, Ronaldo doesn’t post again until Rocknaldo several months later, and one last time after publishing his book.

That’s April 18 2017. The KBCW tumblr is never updated again. KBCS’s final post is not long after, Jul 4, 2017.

Finally, Jane makes a cameo alongside Ronaldo in the very last scene of Steven Universe Future, “The Future.”

Koala Princess, Astral Projection and Psychic Ghosts

So some interesting patterns come up when you connect the two blogs, the clues associated with Jane, and some understanding of Steven’s powers. Let’s revisit Keep Beach City Weird, a Ronaldo’s primary blog, and Keep Beach City Safe, which contains mysteries too big for this simple Dogcopter/Jane-hime lore post.

Keep Beach City Weird - Ran from September 2013 to April 2017, with a lot of posts made in October 2015 and July 2016.

Keep Beach City Safe - Ran from June 2015 to July 2017, with most posts in 2016 of course.

Let’s look at a timeline of posts. I’m going to call out things that we’ll connect to the Jane lore at the end.

Keep Beach City Weird: Ronaldo’s blog

Nov 1, 2013, days before Steven Universe first airs: KBCW’s first post is all about Astral Projection.

Astral Projection! The ability to travel outside your physical body and into other planes of existence!

I began to feel lightheaded and before I knew it, I was floating above my body. Amazing! I walked out onto the boardwalk in my new ASTRAL FORM, and you know what the weird thing was? Nobody even said hello to me. I was COMPLETELY INVISIBLE! I mean, usually nobody really notices me, but this was a different kind of not being noticed. This was not being noticed on another plane of existence - so I didn’t feel bad about it.Anyway, after being ignored in the arcade and Fish Stew Pizza, I got bored and I went back to the fry shop to re-merge with my body.

Astral projection is a power Steven demonstrates a number of times, and you’ll see among these posts that certain powers of Steven involving this stuff are called out by the blog.

Connie: What? Where are you? How are you...? Steven: I’m not sure, but I think it’s a classic psychic ghost type situation. Connie: Ah, of course! So, what’s the plan?

from Reunited

Steven: Oh man. I fell asleep and had this weird dream. I opened the door and Lapis was there, and- Pearl: Well, that doesn’t make any sense. Lapis is fused with Jasper at the bottom of the ocean. Steven: You’ve never had a dream before, huh? Pearl: Uh, I don’t think so.

from Chille Tid

August 28, 2014, Joking Victim, Ronaldo posts about ghosts. And an arsonist from about 150 years ago.

September 04 2014, Steven and the Stevens, Ronaldo posts about "cross dimensional travelers”

And all the cross dimensional time travelers I know don’t want to go on the record about their experiences.

Not mentioning posts that don’t mention ghosts/astral projection/dimensions in some capacity, but in realtime Ronaldo liveblogs in response to episode events.

Ronaldo also answers some fan asks. On October 31 2014 after Keep Beach City Weird he answers this question about floaters with “BACTERIAL GHOSTS” in all caps, this one about his first encounter with the supernatural (the events shown in Horror Club, which aired February 12, 2015)

Nov 2014, Ronaldo posts twice about Watermelon Stevens and a review of the anime Soul Blaster, “Like every anime, Soul Blaster is about a high school student. Our hero is a cool dude, with even cooler hair named Kyosuke. He battles rogue spirits with the help of his Soul Blaster - which happens to be powered by the spirit of his deceased younger brother, Kettaro. “

On December 4, 2014 Ronaldo posts about Koala Princess, who will become important in this post when we get back to Dogcopter and Jane. Koala Princess is repeatedly used as a stand-in for talking about Steven’s journey. In this post Ronaldo says:

AAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Ok, so I just finished the final episode of Koala Princess and I don’t want to get too emotional on you guys but I CAN’T STOP CRYING! Koala Princess goes on a walkabout and enters dreamtime and finally MEETS HER KOALA MOTHER FOR THE FIRST TIME!!! SLKDJFSDJ:FS

I’ve got so many feels! These feels are the real deals! On wheels! WHAT AM I SAYING?! I’M GOING CRAZY!!!

Lion 3: Straight to Video aired on the same day as Ronaldo’s post. In this episode Steven meets Dogcopter in a dream, and then sees his mother Rose Quartz for the first time - she speaks to him via a VHS tape.

After Alone Together, Ronaldo posts about Stevonnie, who is a fusion. He also gets stuck under a fridge for a bit after Future Vision in January 2015.

And I want TO GET OUT FROM UNDER THIS FRIDGE!

He posts like five times about it in the same day because he’s freaking out.

And also I want my body to be shot into space with a print version of my blog so an alien civilization can find me reconstruct my body and worship me.

On February 19 2015 after Winter Forecast, he posts about using time travel to fix bad decisions:

Sometimes I think about all the bad decisions I’ve made and how they’ve affected my life, and I wish I could go back in time and change them. But unless I can find a way to break into the Pentagon and steal a time bike, I’m just stuck with having regrets.

After Political Power Ronaldo claims glowsticks are filled with ghost blood.

Anyway, then stuff happens.

January 4 2016, after The Answer, Ronaldo posts about seeing Dogcopter 4 and shares the poster for it.

One interesting thing about the poster is that if you invert it and mess with the contrast a bit, a strange diagram appears on the left. A true mystery.

And after months of avoiding and spoilers or teasers or trailers, I was in line for Dogcopter 4, and then some dummy walking out of the theater TOTALLY SPOILED EVERYTHING and was like, “I can’t believe that Dogcopter’s parents are actually cats.”

Coming back to Dogcopter in a minute, but these are relevant details.

Dogcopter dies defending the planet but then he comes back to life because he’s actually part cat and cats have 9 lives.

On Jan 5, Steven’s Birthday, Ronaldo posts about celebrating his birthday on a different date every year.

Every year, I celebrate my birthday on a completely different day. Why? To keep my birthdate a SECRET so that no clandestine government agencies can steal my identity!

July 2016, the saga with Jane and KBCS above happens. When he’s sad about Jane breaking up with him, the same day Kiki’s Pizza Delivery Service comes out (in which Steven astral projects into Kiki’s dream), he listens to sad music.

Ugh, I wish I had some sad music to listen to at work. All I have is a playlist of video game soundtracks and some EVP recordings of ghost hauntings. I guess ghosts are sad. I’ll just listen to those.

But if you’re feeling happy, I do suggest listening to the “Go-Go Gorilla Go-Go Kart Racing” soundtrack. Some solid 16-bit J-reggae.

This post may partly be a reference to the Sadie Killer song G-G-G-Ghost, which is performed in The Big Show and wouldn’t air for a bit, but is also astral projection related.

Why can't you see me? Why can't you see me? I think I might be A g-g-g-ghost. Can't you see that I exist? And I don't need an exorcist To let me out Look at me and I'll appear Why can't you see that I'm right here? That I'm right here? Why can't you see me? Why can't you see me? I think I might be A g-g-g-ghost. I'm calling you from the other side

Once Ronaldo has gone through grief and anger, he resorts to begging her to come back. This post is from July 28, the day Alone at Sea aired in which Jasper begs Lapis to return.

Much like Koala Princess’ vision in the Eucalyptus Jungle in Season 5, Episode 13 what you saw on the Boardwalk the other day was not what it seemed. I was only pretending to date Kiki to defend my family’s honor, just as the Kanga-ronin did in Season 1, Episode 3!

Here is another Koala Princess reference. There are a couple SU references in the episode numbers in this post.

The events of Season 5, Episode 13 of KP was not what it seemed: for Steven Universe, this is Your Mother and Mine, in which Garnet tells a story told to her by Rose Quartz. It later turns out to be a false origin story to cover the truth that Rose Quartz was Pink Diamond.

Kanga-ronin pretended at something to defend family honor in Season 1, Episode 3, which in SU is Cheeseburger Backpack - where Steven buys a novelty backpack so he can carry things on missions to be useful for the gems, fails his first mission and pretends he’s fine. The events of this ep are later referenced in The Test.

Finally, Koala Princess’ vision in the Eucalyptus Jungle is a reference to Stevonnie’s vision in Jungle Moon, which is Stevonnie’s first interaction with Pink Diamond via a memory dream. In this dream, all was not as it seemed either.

Then the KBCW blog doesn’t post until Feb 2017, after Rocknaldo. A couple ghost and dream-y quotes from here:

In my searches for THE TRUTH, I’ve done a lot of listening. I’ve listened to haunted houses to hear ghosts from other dimensions. I’ve listened to radio signals from the cosmos for signs of alien life.

I’ve also learned that HUMANS NEED TO SLEEP. I didn’t sleep for 48 hours and I PASSED OUT FOR DAYS.

Ronaldo’s final post is an ad for his book, which comes out during a hiatus, and he references Koala Princess again:

I did have a little help from some fellow truth-stigators I met on a Koala Princess forum, Ben Levin and Matt Burnett, but most of the work was definitely done by ME!

Now let’s look at Keep Beach City Safe.

Keep Beach City Safe: [???]’s blog

For KBCS, I’m only going to skim to address ghost/astral projection related content that comes back to the business with Jane, Dogcopter, Koala Princess and Rose. The rest of this blog is a little too big for right now.

It’s interesting that KBCS seems to have mostly flown under the radar, but between the Jane arc and a couple other things I believe it to be legit. Suffice to say I’m treating it as real and you will see why in a minute.

For KBCS I’ll mostly mention which episode a post is associated with, but not the date like with Ronaldo’s.

KBCS’s reaction blog to Nightmare Hospital includes a couple relevant lines:

Where was the Gem M.? I heard footsteps behind me. I turned around! It was mom!

Don’t tell me It’s on the other side of the hall corner. That would mean it saw mo- Connie’s mom!

KBCS posts a blog between Too Far and The Answer, in which they review a number of events. (They post another blog about fusions in which they describe Garnet and Stevonnie’s components as well)

During the movie the TV just shut down and they were being chased around by a “ghost”. It was actually a gem stuck inside the house, making the house seem like it was possessed.

They also get pretty excited about Steven’s birthday.

Only a few more minutes until Steven’s Birthday!

Eeeeh! Only a few mins left until midnight. We finally get to learn about Garnet’s past! Are guys happy, I know I am. I can’t even express how happy I feel, but I’ll try. And I will not act crazy while doing it, Imma keep it cool. So it’s like Peace and Love had a son, and his name was Steven! Then Steven fused with Connie, who was the daughter of Happiness. And they formed Stevonnie, who was made of everything right within the universe!

On Steven’s Birthday they also post about the Dogcopter 4 movie.

I’m gonna be a Smart Spoiler and drop hints in my post for you guess. Only those who have watched it will notice the clues. Yep, watching it 9 times.

This clearly references Ronaldo’s post about Dogcopter having nine lives, but KBCS is a little more considerate about spoilers.

In KBCS’s “It Could’ve Been Great” post, they’re still talking about Steven’s birthday. There’s a promo image attached as well.

To start things off I just wanted to say: I did see Steven turn into a baby? And I would also like to say: DID YOU SEE STEVEN TURN INTO A BABY!?!?

So, by now your probably wondering what the second image is aren’t you? We clearly it’s a pic of Rose holding a cupcake candle.

We, here at Keep Beach City Safe, thought that Steven would’ve liked to have his mom at his birthday party. Happy Birthday from all of us at KBCS. Hope you like it.

Future Vision reference. (Some of this is less relevant to the Jane thing but I’m pulling quotes that are related to fusion and stuff in the hopes it gets clearer)

This reminds me of the time that Garnet gave Stevens her future vision. I don’t know what happens exactly, but I think you see what’s going to happen in the future hence the name future vision. Being able to see into the future would be awesome, yet terrified at same time.

There’s a great post about Pie Day - in fact, KBCS posts about Pie Day a few times. They call out Pearl, too, which reminds me of a certain prolific fandom video editor’s handle.

You know who else knows about Pi. Pearl, but also Peridot.

Pearl Doesn’t Like Pie. Happy Pie Day!

This is not a good photo of Pear let’s see if we can find a better one. Now that’s better.

Sorry for the tangent. Let’s talk koalas now.

KBCS posts about The New Lars. They have thoughts about Steven’s ability to hop into other bodies, namely the question of whether Rose could do this as well.

Steven is worried that Lars isn’t being truthful about his feelings. So through his dreams, Steven jumps into Lar’s body, and trys to make his life better. But he only makes things worse.

Steven somehow possessed Lars’s body through his dreams. He’s done it before and he’ll do it again, we have a word for it now: Dream Possession. But he can also enter dreams.

He did it with Lapis, the Watermelon Stevens, and now Lars. That’s one gem, one sentient plant, and one human. Well with lapis he was merely communicating with her. This, new power, is seems to activates itself whenever Steven wants to help someone, but can’t because something getting in the way. Could this be a power passed down from Rose, or is this a power he himself posses?

#koala vs sloth

in The New Lars, koalas come up twice. Koalas in SU are associated with Steven’s astral projection powers. Remember how Koala Princess met her mother in the dreamscape?

Steven: For your consideration...The koala, a marsupial from the forests of Australia, and the sloth, hailing from the forests of South America. Who should be crowned the king of the "Hanging Around Doing Nothing" mammals!?

Steven in Lars’ body: Whatcha doing? Hanging out? Buck: Yeah. Steven: That's cool. Would you say you hang out more like koalas or sloths? Uh, I'm asking for Steven.

Steven: Um... I'm really, really sorry about yesterday. I got you a card, it's got a koala and a sloth.

From The New Lars. Steven references koalas three times.

KBCS gets to Beach City Drift. They take notice of Jane and of Kevin’s car.

Hey did you guys notice that girl that keeps appear. We saw her when Steven took Connie to the movies and now she’s here. I wonder if she’s involved in something. Hmmmm.

So Stevonnie raced Kevin down the hill in his Himitsu X12, that’s secret in Japanese.

So while we’re back on the subject of Jane, here’s something interesting about Dogcopter and the Himitsu X12. They both show up in advertisements together in the background of Empire City.

Mr Greg

Same Old World

This is what KBCS is talking about - Dogcopter has a secret.

For Kiki’s Pizza Delivery Service, KBCS has more to say about dreams.

She has a nightmare and Steven, coincidentally, falls asleep after eating and enters Kiki’s dream. Now Steven The Dream Warrior, must help Kiki battle her dream, and finally end this nightmare once and for all.

Steven, who for some reason keeps going into people’s dreams, goes into Kiki’s dream.

Steven fought for about week, and he’s was tired by day four. And we know from experience that a sleepless Steven, is a cranky Steven.

This is the same power Steven used in Chille Tid. and look who showed up again?

After Monster Reunion airs, KBCS posts a liveblog and includes a far-fetched accusation that Rose Quartz is Pink Diamond.

Think about it! A Diamond should have access to all gem controlled tech, right. And if Rose Quartz was Pink Diamond, which she is, then she should be able to too, right. And Steven has Rose’s gem. So now Steven can access gem tech. And one more thing to prove this theory once and for all.

But there’s one thing that doesn’t add up. Rose Quartz… is a Quartz. How could she be a Diamond?????? Maybe I’m wrong, she could have been just working along side Pink Diamond. Maybe this just a crackpot theory about the impossible. I don’t think gems can turn into different gems? who knows, I guess we’ll find out sooner or later.

When KBCS gets to Crack the Whip, they take note of Lion and tag him thrice:

Crack the Whip! Is it just me or is that foreshadowing?

Oh, did I mention that Lion was there. He was just there, when Connie opened the door, he walked up and just started hanging. It was so cool! It was like, Just Lion Things 2! So the snack break, that takes the whole day, ends at the beach, where the idea originally began.

Amethyst faces off Jasper, gem to gem, while Steven and Connie, and don’t forget Lion, fight the corrupted gem.

Lion was keeping the Gem Monster busy while all of this was happening. I was so stunned when Steven and Connie fused, without doing a fusion dance! How well they worked, together, they rode on Lion, and defeated Jasper, and poofed the Gem Monster all at the same time!!!

#just lion things 2 #lion fights #lion still fights

There’s also a weird Google Slides slideshow connected to the KBCS account, which includes this image featuring Lion, Tiny Floating Whale, (and Connie and Greg) and the word TRUE with Steven’s affirmative!

More Koala Princess

Two more Koala Princess references - although only one is immediately relevant -

In Gemcation, Ronaldo keeps texting Steven about Koala Princess. Steven’s lockscreen is a selfie with him and Lion.

Also, as a sidenote, Koala Princess is implicated in sneople trolls on anime message boards.

Dogcopter

These are just the Dogcopter appearances (Thanks to SU wiki as well as my brain) Dogcopter fights robots in at least one timeline, and the book is allegedly really long. Bold Dogcopters are the pink dogcopter, everything else is an ad or grey.

Lars and the Cool Kids - Poster

Lion 2 - The movie they all go see.

Lion 3 - Gives Steven advice.

Chille Tid - Shows Steven how to find Lapis. Meows. (Dogcopter’s parents are cats.)

Same Old World & Mr. Greg - Advertisement

Kiki’s Pizza Delivery Service - flies Steven away.

In Dreams and Growing Pains (Note this is grey Dogcopter) - Flies away in Stefan’s nightmare, proposes to Drew the driver (or at least offers them something) in the Dogcopter 6 Till Death Do Us Bark I Now Pronounce You Man and Woof trailer.

Snow Day - Pupcopter, a spinoff for babies.

And for Steven’s Birthday - Connie points out a Dogcopter constellation.

Astral Projection

Another quick summary. I’ve written a lot on this psychic ghost stuff so check my blog if you want the tags, idrc. Summary of astral projection powers Steven has shown:

Leaving his body (Reunited, Escapism)

Possessing other bodies (New Lars, Escapism, SWI)

Traveling to others’ dreams (Kiki’s Pizza, Chille Tid)

Interacting with fusion components within the fusion’s mind (Chille Tid, Mindful)

Regarding KBCS’s question of whether Rose could have done this, it doesn’t seem impossible - and as of Fragments and Homeworld Bound, we know that Gems don’t die when they are killed. (Lol.) That is, the personality/soul can appear in the same gem if it’s shattered and repaired. And Steven’s mom’s gem is perfectly intact, inside him.

Literally what is the point of all this

So after KBCS and KBCW spent so long talking about astral projection, ghosts, dreams, fusions, etc etc. they never actually got to the point - just pointed us in the direction of a bunch of clues that

Rose Quartz isn’t gone.

Obviously. She’s in his gem in him, like Lapis and the mirror, or the lighthouse gem. She uses astral projection to help Steven in his dreams as well as see him in Rose’s room, like other fusions speak in the mindscape. (There’s a lot more to this but this is enough to ask anyone to wrap their head around atm)

She also interacts with him through other bodies, the same way Steven takes over Lars’ body, or the Watermelon Stevens.

Remember this?

We, here at Keep Beach City Safe, thought that Steven would’ve liked to have his mom at his birthday party.

Who came to Steven’s birthday in which Connie points out that Dogcopter constellation?

Who gave Steven advice when he wished he could talk to his mom?

Who showed Steven where to find the tape?

Who else could have asked Steven, “What do you want” in Susan Egan’s voice?

(Why did they choose to hire Susan Egan to voice a cameo in Under the Knife in the first few seconds of Fusion Cuisine, where she says “It’s my son!” while Lion is onscreen)

Or reassured him that Rose’s tape was telling him the truth?

Who first brought him to Pink Diamond’s moon base?

Who knew where Rose’s armory was and how to train with it? (Note the giant penny)

Who showed Steven the location of Pink’s fallen palanquin?

Who found Rose’s lost scabbard?

and knew where Pearl would run to when she’s upset?

Who (reluctantly) brought Steven to the landfill and Pink Diamond’s ship?

Who showed him how to find Malachite?

Twice?

Who showed him how Pink Diamond tried to stop the Earth’s colonization, and who to ask for the truth?

Who tried to entertain him on Mask Island when he was trapped on Homeworld?

And then rescued him from the open sea?

Who showed Stevonnie the password to Yellow Diamond’s moon base?

Much like Koala Princess’ vision in the Eucalyptus Jungle in Season 5, Episode 13 what you saw on the Boardwalk the other day was not what it seemed.

So yeah Rose is Lion 2020. Thanks for reading this extremely long nonsense.

Also thanks to @babybeetlebongos for both mindscape lore and fixing Ronaldo’s cheek in the banner image, lol. I made a Twitter thread about this as well (and the more in depth Lion and astral projection theory threads are quoted at the top, if you need them. the #mindscape deeplore 2020 tag/tags on this post have stuff too.)

#steven universe theory #steven universe future #su theory #steven universe #rose is lion 2020 #mindscape deeplore 2020 #jane lore 2020 #kbcs lore #dogcopter #lion the mood #rosedemption 2020 #would you believe this isn't even the deep part of the rabbit hole??? im tired tho #i hope i left enough info for others to get into KBCS if anyone cares #i love this fool rose quartz

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