#but we’re past that and it’s all ok now because they love my book!

[prncssguya]

no one is talking enough about lumon wanting to use ricken’s book as a new propagandist tool against the innies

[luveline]

hi! i just remembered a scene from friends where chandler says to monica it's ok she's high maintenance cause he likes maintaining her and i think this is soooo spencer and bombshell!reader coded. you're ok with writing this as a request? love u jadey

ty (ily)!! fem!reader

Spencer’s feet ache dully with each step he takes, but you have your hand in his, and you’re pulling him along with a smile. Your smile could cure anything, he thinks stupidly. It’s completely outside of his beliefs, goes against every book on medicine he’s ever read. 

“Why are you frowning?” you ask, swinging his hand as you turn the corner together. 

“I’m not.” 

You step closer, arm stuck to his arm, nearly one body walking together against the summer breeze. “You’re frowning, Spence. You have a very obvious pout. It is so so cute.” You lean in to kiss him quickly, his heart turning to a pitter-patter under his ribs. 

“I’m tired,” he explains, not wanting you to think his bad mood has anything to do with you. 

“You’ve had a long day, that’s why. When we get back to your place I’ll give you an incredible foot massage and everything will be okay again.” 

“I don’t want a foot massage. My feet don’t even hurt,” he lies.

“Don’t bother.” You untangle your fingers from his and wave him away. “I know all your tells, baby boy,” —he laughs through a wrinkled nose— “nothing gets past me.” 

“Why’d you choose a dry cleaners so far from your apartment?” he asks. You could’ve picked the one beside work, which has a yellow pages worth of fantastic reviews. The one second closest to his place is new but raved about at length. This dry cleaners is nearly twenty-five blocks away.

“They do things exactly how I like it, I guess. I never have to worry about it when I give them my best clothes, and it’s kind of expensive if they were to accidentally ruin something, right?” You have expensive taste; you like things sturdy, fitted, and fashionable. 

“Do you think I should get someone to do my laundry?” he asks. 

“You can afford it. But maybe not. There’s nothing wrong with your own washing machine and a steamer.” You side eye him carefully. “Maybe I’m over the top.” 

“You’re high maintenance,” he agrees. “Is it expensive, getting your clothes dry cleaned all the time? I could pay for that.” 

“What? Why would you pay for it?” 

“‘Cos we’re together?” He’s more worried than dry about it. “I’d like to pay for your manicures and your hair, too, but I didn’t think you’d let me.”

“And I won’t… s’kind of nice you want to though. Really nice, um.” You’re blinking funny. “I think that’s more of a husband thing. You really want to pay for me to get manicures?” 

Spencer pays for lots of your stuff because he loves you. Good food mostly, but treats, clothes, anything he might think you’re interested in, actually. He likes to spoil you. You tend to spoil him back, if not with money then affection. “I like maintaining you.” 

You curl your arm through his. “That’s a funny way to say it.” 

He laughs at your obvious delight. “I like taking care of you,” he admits. “You like being high maintenance, it makes you happy, and I like making you happy.” 

“Thank you very much,” you say, softer now as your hand works up his neck and you turn his face to you, the sidewalk and the streetlines melting away under your warm touch. “You make me happier than you know.” 

His cheeks turn pink. He doesn’t need to see himself to confirm. It’s a high statistical probability. 

“Kiss?” you ask, voice still soft. 

Spencer walks you back nearer to the side of a building and out of the way, his hands at your neck and waist as he leans down just a touch to close your gap. He acts selfishly, perhaps, taking your hand from his face in order to hold yours in both of his without anything in the way of it. He kisses, he breathes you in, his head tilting more heavily to the side as the kiss lengthens, lingers. You’re like a flower in his hand, blooming slowly under the effects of a little heat. 

“What if you pay for my dry cleaning,” you begin, a smile evident in your voice though Spencer keeps his eyes closed. Tracing the hill of your cheek with his fingers just a moment longer. “And I pay for yours?” 

Spencer thumbs along your jaw. “I don’t want anything from you, just you.” 

“Well, what if I treat us to some Indian takeout tonight?” you ask. “Would you eat that? Or am I enough to sustain you, my love?” 

He could enjoy being taken care of in turn, he thinks. 

[hcsiqs]

wait “bad idea right?” was cute 🥹🥹🥹 i need more kate x singer!reader! perhaps singer!reader moving her life to go live with kate in vegas? 🥹 please please pleek and thank you !

| we really were timeless

• pairing: kate martin x fem!reader

• summary: reader is on tiktok live showing her new home in las vegas and her fans get a glimpse into the life of her and kate.

• word count: 1.1k

• find part 1 here

“Heyy!” you waved into the camera with an unknown background behind you, that your fans had seemed to question as soon as they noticed the room. “No, I’m not in Iowa” you laughed, setting the camera down in the bedroom you and Kate shared. The bedroom was decorated with plants and books all along the room as well as small photos and polaroids the couple had taken of themselves as well as photos of their friends.

“I moved!” you said dramatically using your hands to show off the room behind you in all of its glorious adornments that you and Kate had managed to set up in the past few weeks. “I’m a Las Vegas girl now” you smiled, standing up from the bed, “What if I give a house tour? But, mind you we have barely had time to decorate anything, so it’s a little bare!” you giggled, holding the phone close to your face as you walked through the house. You moved your head out of view as you entered into the living room and lowered your voice to a whisper as you spoke to your blonde girlfriend, “I’m gonna do a little house tour, alright?”

“Wait, can I be like the tour guide?” Kate asked cheerfully as she looked up from her phone and put her full attention to you.

“Mhm” you nodded, biting your lip trying to hold back a smile. Kate then got off the couch and planted a soft kiss on your lips off camera. “Ok guys I have a special guest for y’all!” you smiled, hovering your finger over the flip camera button. “Kate!” you exclaimed, turning the camera around to proudly show off your girlfriend, who did a stupid little dance causing you both to fall into a fit of laughter.

they are my favorite couple ever

stop kate is so cuteee

“Ok, ok!” you laughed walking towards the front door.

“So, when you first enter the house we have this lovely bench where you can take your shoes off” Kate spoke displaying the area, before you turned the camera around to face yourself, “Because we don’t want no one’s nasty shoes on our floor,” you turned the camera back around to show a nodding Kate who was in agreement.

“Then straight off there is our living room!” the blonde announced, showing off the plush couch that sat in the middle. “This is y/n’s favorite part” Kate pointed down at the green rug on the floor. You just rolled your eyes behind the camera because the rug was fully Kate’s choice because she said it would be perfect for the house. “But yeah, not much in here yet beside the PS4, so I can play games, and the couch,” Kate shrugged.

“And if you come this way,” Kate used her hands to direct you and the camera to follow her, “our kitchen! I know it’s all white and bland at the moment but we’re working on it” she laughed showing the kitchen island and then walking over to the fridge and opening it, “Oh!” you both let out as the fridge revealed to only hold some take-out food from the night before and a thing of pink lemonade.

“We’re working on grocery shopping” you laughed from behind the camera.

“Yeah, we’re doordash feens” Kate responded, pointing her finger at you. She then closed the fridge and brought you over to the small table you two had bought the other day. “This is our newest addition,” the blonde smiled, showing off the table that had been set to look fancy.

The tall girl kept showing off the home until getting to a room she thought that you should take over and show off to the viewers on live. “Babe, you wanna show them?” Kate’s voice was in a whisper, but it could still be heard by viewers, which caused the comments to go crazy.

DID Y’ALL HEAR THAT???

UGH I NEED WHAT THEY HAVE

“Yeah” you nodded, handing the phone over to Kate and appearing in front of the camera for the first time since the start of the live. “Kate was so kind to let me use our spare room as a little music room!” you said with a smile never leaving your face, as you opened the door and revealed the soundproofing pads on the walls and the different music equipment showering the room.

“This is where all the magic happens,” you said, running your hand across the piano, allowing random notes to be played. “Guys! This right here is my most prized possession!” your face glowed as you pulled a guitar off the wall and showed it to the camera, “It was signed by the one and only Taylor Swift! I still can’t believe it” you shook your head slightly recounting the memory of when you had met her.

“Still jealous you met her and not me” Kate said behind the camera, clearly showing her jealousy.

“Maybe, I can pull some strings for you, hm?” you cocked your head to the side resting your hands on your hips. Your eyes caught a glimpse of Kate’s blue ones from behind the camera and you found yourself wanting to look into them forever, but you knew you needed to move on with the tour. “Anywho! Let’s continue!” you laughed dragging Kate out of the room to have her follow her.

After a couple more minutes of the tour and being on live you decided it was time to go, so that you could spend time with Kate before she had to head off to practice.

You two were sitting on the couch, your legs draping over Kate’s as a tv show played quietly on the tv. “I’m so happy you’re here with me” Kate dropped her head into the crook of your neck, as her hands found their way around your waist.

“I’m so happy to be here with you,” you giggled, feeling her breath on your neck that almost tickled. She then began to place small kisses on your neck and exposed collarbone, that sent a shiver down your spine. “Kate, you have to get to practice” you groaned.

“But, I wanna stay here with you” she whined, still leaving kisses on your shoulder.

“Come on, time to go,” you got off of Kate and held your hands out to pull her off the couch. Her hands reached up to yours and you pulled her off the couch. She placed a small kiss on your lips before walking over to get her keys.

“See you late, love you” she smiled, circling the keys on her finger.

“Love you too” you smiled back before she walked out the front door to head to Aces practice.

allie’s corner.

i hope you like this!! they’re so cutie

[jobean12-blog]

Cozy in Love

Pairing: Joel Miller x female reader (Lumberjack AU)

Word Count: 1,572

Summary: Your man is the best way to keep warm when it's cold outside.

Author's Note: Just a bit of domestic lumberjack fluff and a bit of blantant oogling because let's be honest, if I had a Joel Miller lumberjack to stare at all day I WOULD! My daydreams are getting me through these days so I'm just sharing them. Thank you so much for reading! Much love always! ❤️❤️❤️Divider by the lovely Daisy, thank you @firefly-graphics

Warnings: soft and sweet and cuddly and flirty and fun

Joel Miller Masterlist

His soft hair slips between your fingers as you mindlessly run them through his messy curls. He’s been asleep for the past hour, his head nestled in your lap, keeping you warm as you read your book.

Your hand moves down the back of his neck, lightly scratching before you slide your fingers along the edge of his beard. When your fingertips graze his lips, he extends them for a soft kiss and then grabs your wrist, holding your hand to his mouth as he presses kisses to your palm.

His eyes remain closed but his dark lashes flutter against his cheeks as he slowly wakes.

“Hey darlin’,” he murmurs with a small stretch.

You lean forward and kiss the back of his hand that’s holding yours. “Hi,” you whisper. “Have a good nap?”

“Mm,” he hums as his hand lifts and his warm fingers grasp the back of your neck to pull you closer.

After a sweet kiss he releases you and slowly sits up.

When you lock eyes your mouth turns up in a smirk as you take him in.

“What?” he asks, rubbing his hand over his face.

You giggle.

“Darlin’,” he grumbles and falls forward, wrapping you in his arms and taking you with him as he lays back down.

He stares down at you, now trapped under the weight of his body, and raises his eyebrows expectantly.

“Your hair,” you state and squeeze your lips together to try and stop more laughter.

“What about it?” he asks.

You reach up and pat some of the strands that are sticking straight up while pulling at the curly ones.

“If it looks a mess it’s your fault,” he says.

“I like it,” you whisper.

“Good, because we have to get to the store before the storm hits or you aren’t gonna have any snacks for the next few days. And I don’t feel like fixing my hair.”

“But Joeeeelllll,” you whine. “It’s cold out. And you’re so warm and cuddly.”

You tug him closer and nuzzle your face into his neck. “I don’t want to go,” you mumble into his skin.

“I can go myself darlin’. You stay here and keep warm.”

“NO!” you squeak. “It’s never warm enough without you.”

He pulls away and his eyes wander over your face. He’s clearly trying to figure out a way to make you happy and before he can offer more suggestions you sigh and say, “ok, ok, let’s go and get it over with so we can come home and I can get warm again.”

He gets up and starts to unbutton his flannel. You watch as his long fingers work open each button and reveal more of his skin.

“If this is your way to motivate me to leave the house you’re doing it all wrong,” you breathe out.

“It’s for you to wear while we’re out,” he says with a wink.

Once he has it off he drapes it over your shoulders and slips just out of your reach as you grab for him.

“If you start touchin’ me…,” he says with a warning look. “We’ll never get out of here and then when you’re hungry and we’re out of snacks we’ll both be in trouble.”

You huff as you dramatically push your arms through the sleeves of his flannel. “FINE!”

You can hear his chuckle as he disappears into the bedroom to get another shirt.

When you’re bundled up and buckled in the pick-up truck you head into town to the store. The parking lot is busy considering everyone is preparing for incoming inclement weather.

“They better have some good stuff left!” you pout.

Joel gives you a lopsided smile before he hops out of the truck and comes around to open your door. You slide out and into his arms.

“Come on darlin’, we’ll make this as quick as possible.”

You nod and snuggle under his arm.

As you make your way down the aisles and peruse the shelves, Joel pushes the cart, his smile growing with each snack you add.

“We should definitely get cookies…because cookies…and definitely some chips, and I want to get the ingredients to make muffins…and let’s make soup!”

You ramble on with your list but Joel remains silent, listening and keeping his smile.

“Think that’s enough?” you ask with a sigh of relief.

He stops in the aisle along the shelves of sugar and spice. “Perfect darlin,” he smirks, his eyes intense.

“What?” you ask with a suspicious glare.

“What nothin’,” he says as he leans over the bar of the shopping cart. “Just thinkin’ about how beautiful you are and how I can’t wait to spend the next few days stuck in the house with you.”

“Oh,” you say as his sweet words wash over you like a warm caress. “I can’t either.”

Back at the cabin he unloads the truck and ushers you inside.

“I’m just going to put these away then we can get right back on the couch,” you tell him as you practically skip into the kitchen.

“While you do that I’m gonna go chop the last of the wood darlin’. We don’t have much left and if the power goes out we’ll want a fire.”

“Are you saying you aren’t enough to keep me warm at night Joel Miller?”

Your response is dripping with sass and you waggle your eyebrows.

Your words stop him dead and his hands land on his hips as his jaw sets into a firm line.

“Is that a challenge?” he shoots back.

“Maybe,” you shrug.

“Mm, alright then darlin’. Forget the wood.”

You drag your bottom lip over your teeth before you quietly add, “but I love to watch you chop wood.”

His head drops toward his chest and his shoulders shake with his chuckle before he grabs his suspenders that hang over the hook on the coat rack.

“WAIT!” you shout as you round the island and rush to him. “Let me.”

The side of his mouth tilts up into a boyish smirk and he hands you the suspenders.

You reach over his head and put the band around his neck, flattening the material against his broad shoulders as you smooth the straps down his chest.

“Turn around,” you say softly.

He does as you ask and you clip the back part onto his jeans and then with a squeeze of his butt you turn him back around.

“Couldn’t resist,” you giggle.

“Don’t mind at all darlin’,” he winks.

When the front clips are secured onto his jeans you grab the two straps and tug him forward, meeting his lips half way for a kiss.

His hands settle on your waist and slip under your shirt.

“That’ll keep me warm…for now,” he murmurs against your lips.

When you break apart he starts for the door and you rush toward the front window and push aside the curtains.

“Hurry! The sun is going to set soon and I won’t be able to see!”

He shakes his head, his exasperation clearly feigned by the sparkle in his eyes.

“Wouldn’t want that now would we darlin’,” he murmurs.

“No…this is like foreplay.”

His eyes go dark as he holds your gaze and with one last grind of his teeth he opens the door and steps outside.

You press yourself to the glass, unperturbed by its coolness and stare as he saunters over to the woodpile. His profile is silhouetted by the last rays of the low hanging sun and when he starts to roll up the sleeves of his flannel you sigh dreamily.

When his forearms are free of the fabric he bends over to wrap his large hands around the handle of the axe. His warm breath comes out in wisps of condensed air before he rears back and takes one full swing to the piece of wood.

It splits in two with a crack and the pieces thud to the ground.

A moan slips past your lips and you wiggle on your feet, waiting for him to gear up for the next swing. You watch him take swing after swing, the pile of chopped wood growing with every passing minute.

When he gets to the last piece he rests it on the tree stump and then sets his axe down against it. He reaches in the back pocket of his jeans and pulls out his handkerchief, wiping his brow and the back of his neck.

He wraps it around his hand then reaches for the axe again. The last piece of wood splits just as the sun reaches the horizon and he begins to gather as many pieces as he can carry.

He turns toward the cabin, walking slowly with arms laden with chunks of wood, his corded forearms flexing and his jeans pulled tightly over his powerful thighs.

A gust of wind moves across the yard and blows his hair over his forehead and the collar of his shirt spreads open even wider, exposing more of his muscled neck.

Your whole body is thrumming and before he reaches the porch you’re at the door and holding it open. He strides past you and sets the wood down by the fireplace.

“That should do it,” he says as he wipes his hands.

His eyes sweep over you from head to toe as he wears a perfectly smug smile, knowing full well he’s got you hotter than any fire ever could.

@hiddles-rose @blackwidownat2814 @kmc1989 @lorilane33 @littleseasiren @lizette50

[juniperskye]

It had to be You.

Sneak Peek: Modern Day AU! (kinda think late 90’s early 2000’s) Running into your ex at your mutual friends’ engagement party, that was something you had expected and were mentally prepared for. Him looking that damn good and the chaos that ensues…you were not expecting. Flashbacks are bolded.

Eddie Munson x Artist! Fem Reader

Angst/ Fluff (at the end)

Word count: 2301

REQUESTS ARE OPEN - not edited - please be kind. Feedback is welcome if it's constructive!

Warnings: READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!!! My blog is 18+, minors DNI, explicit language, past relationship, mention of reader having a troubled past, Steve, and Nancy are together in this (they work ok…sorry not sorry), nobody is dead!, no use of y/n, lovers to enemies to lovers, Eddie is unnamed until the end...idk I felt that it worked for this story (despite you knowing it's him), let me know if I missed any!

I do not consent to having my work translated or reposted to any other site. That being said I do not own the characters portrayed in this story.

You were elated when you got the call. Steve had called you to let you know that he had officially done it, he had asked Nancy to marry him! You knew he was planning it, hell, you helped him pick the ring for her, you just didn’t know when. You expressed your excitement and congratulated the happy couple asking them about the possibility of an engagement party. Nancy had let you know they weren’t planning one but would love it.

You immediately begun planning the party, creating an evite and curating the perfect guestlist. You called Enzo’s to see if they could accommodate a party of this size. Once that was confirmed and booked, you made sure to call in some reinforcements.

You had called Robin, Chrissy, Max, El, and Dustin. Chrissy had stayed in Hawkins; she went to the community college there and now teaches at Hawkins high. Max, El, Dustin, along with some of the others (Will, Lucas, and Mike) were finishing school at Indiana University, Robin had gone to Butler, and currently resided in Indianapolis. Nancy and Steve had recently moved back to Hawkins after finishing school in Chicago, Nancy was offered an editing position at the Hawkins Journal.

You on the other hand had been living in New York City ever since graduation. It hadn’t happened exactly as you had planned it…which is the exact reason you were nervous to return to Hawkins.

“We’re gonna graduate, then we will pack up the van and hightail it out of here babe.”

“I was thinking New York. You know…that way you can pursue your music, and I can pursue my art.” You replied.

“That sounds perfect baby! Just a few more weeks and we can go.” He grabbed your hand and the two of you laid back against the pillows in the back of the van.

**One Month Later**

You pulled up to the trailer with your car packed full of your belongings. You were ready to get to New York and start your life! You were even more excited to start your life with him. You stopped the car and made your way up the steps, knocking gently.

“Hey kiddo.” Uncle Wayne greeted.

“Hey Wayne! Is he ready to go?” You asked.

“He better be, with all the noise he was making. Head on back.” Wayne gestured for you to go down the hall.

“Babe! Are you packed and ready to…” your voice trailed off as you entered his room, noticing the severe lack of moving boxes or suitcases. “What the hell? Why aren’t you packed?”

“I uh, I don’t think we should go.”

“What do you mean? We’ve been planning this for months; you were the one who always said once you graduated you would get the hell out of here.” You shouted.

“I know, but I just, I don’t think it’s a good idea. I can’t just leave Uncle Wayne, and who’s to say we don’t get to New York, and everything goes to shit? At least here we know things work.” He challenged.

“We’ll never know if we don’t try. Also, we’re stronger than that, just because we move doesn’t mean this is automatically falls apart.” You replied.

“I can’t go, why don’t you understand that? It’s not going to work. We can stay here and build a life. I have a job at the garage, and you can paint here.” He huffed.

“Well, I can’t stay here.” Your gaze drifted to your feet. “Hawkins is too small, we were destined for something bigger, which is why I need to go to New York.”

“So that’s it then? You’re just gonna leave?” He muttered.

“No. You don’t get to do that. You don’t get to make me feel guilty for following through with our plans. If anyone should feel guilty here it’s you for tricking me into thinking that you were actually going to come with me. But instead, you’re bailing on me, just like everyone else.” You bellowed, quickly making your exit.

That day you had left for New York and didn’t look back. You had travelled to Indianapolis and Chicago to visit your friends, but you hadn’t stepped foot back in Hawkins since then, and you really weren’t looking forward to it.

You spent the next week coordinating with everyone, in hopes of planning the best engagement party for your friends. You guys worked on decorations, who would get the happy couple to Enzo’s on time. And in just two weeks, you’d find yourself standing in the nicest restaurant in Hawkins Indiana.

“Oh my gosh, you look gorgeous!” Chrissy squealed, jogging over to embrace you.

“I could say the same about you! Congratulations by the way.” You beamed, gently caressing Chrissy’s now prominent bump.

Chrissy and you caught up with one another, and as the others arrived you greeted everyone and began decorating. Pretty much everyone had arrived except for Robin, she had been the person you assigned to get Steve and Nancy to Enzo’s.

You had been placing the last floral centerpiece on its designated table when you heard his voice. Loud and boisterous as always, greeting Dustin, and the other boys as he made his way back to where you were setting up.

“When was the last time you spoke to him?” Max inquired.

“The day I left for New York.” You replied, shaking your head as you straighten out the vase.

“You know he came to New York.” Dustin mentioned, having butt into your conversation. “It was about six months after you left, he went to the studio you were renting and saw you painting, he said that he didn’t want to mess anything up for you and that he wanted to make something of himself before he saw you again.” Dustin concluded.

You couldn’t help the look of shock that took over your features. “It doesn’t change anything. He made his choice.” You said with a sense of finality and walked away.

Fifteen minutes later, Robin entered the restaurant with Nancy and Steve trailing in behind her. The room erupted in cheers for the newly engaged, the two of the were passed from person to person for a warm embrace. There was nothing to do but smile at the radiant glow that the two of them wore. The longer you were surrounded by all this happiness, the tighter your chest became, you needed air.

The minute you reached the exit, you felt relief, the cool night air surrounding you, finally allowing you to take in a deep breath. You took a few steps away from the exit and leaned up against the brick building.

“Was the cheerful mood suffocating you too?”

You’s recognize that voice anywhere. It was once something that made you swoon, but now it felt like a knife to the heart. You wanted nothing more than to run far away and hide forever. You had really hoped that by the time you needed to confront him, you’d have already moved on and started a new life.

“I didn’t realize someone was out here. I’ll just go.”

A hand gently gripping your wrist stopped you. Your head whipped around, fully ready to tell him off, but the look on his face stopped you dead in your tracks. He wore an expression that you were very familiar with. It was the same one that stared back at you when you looked in the mirror. Sunken eyes, dark circles, dull looking skin, clearly missing that glow that your best friends currently wore.

“Please just talk to me.” He pleaded.

“I have nothing to say to you.” You murmured.

“Then listen. Please, I have something I’d really like to say to you.” He released your wrist and his gaze shifted up his eyes begging you to stay.

“You have five minutes.” You didn’t have it in you to hold back the eyeroll.

“Thank you!” He hollered. “Okay sweetheart, where do I begin? I um, the reason I didn’t go to New York with you was because I was scared. And I know that sounds like some bullshit excuse, but I mean it. I was terrified that we would get there, and you would become this successful artist and I’d just be like this bum that was holding you back from being great. I just figured that if I stayed here that I’d have the band and the job at the garage, and nothing would have to change. Only everything changed, the guys graduated and went off to college, the band broke up and worst of all, you were gone. I really fucked it all up, which is why I worked so hard to make something of myself.” He explained.

“Dustin told me you came to New York. Why didn’t you tell me?” You asked.

“When I saw your studio, I saw you working on this piece, it was a big charcoal piece, and I don’t know. I guess I just didn’t want to fuck things up for you more than I already had.”

“The charcoal piece, it uh, it was. Did you see what the piece was?” You pressed.

“No, I didn’t. I bet it was great though. Sweetheart, I uh, can I show you something?”

“Okay.” You nodded.

He led you over to a motorcycle, he grabbed the helmet and went to put it on and turned toward you, offering you the spare. You glanced from the helmet to his face, and he offered a subtle nod. You placed the helmet on your head, and he reached up to tighten the chin strap for you. You let out a sharp breath at the contact, releasing a cough to try and cover it.

The two of you rode through the city, stopping in front of a garage you didn’t recognize. The logo was in large red letters outlined in white. A bright contrast of the black painted brick. He assisted you off the back of his motorcycle and led you into the building.

“This uh, this is my shop.”

“What do you mean?” You asked.

“So, uh after high school, I kept selling for a while, saving up my money. Then Rick got picked up and sent to prison. So, I got the job at the garage, I worked as many hours as possible, putting in the work. Anyway uh, I got pretty close with the owner and he uh, he left me the place when he died two years ago.” He replied.

“This is great. I’m really happy for you bub.” The nickname slipped out faster than you could comprehend.

“I have something else I’d like to show you.”

“Okay.”

This time, he drove you through a neighborhood you recognized from your youth. It housed beautiful (affordable) family homes, the ones that you had imagined raising your family in. These were the homes you still visualized when you pictured your future. And he was the man that you woke up next to in these images.

When he pulled into the driveway of one of the homes you were confused. He had always expressed his distaste of these homes. You had always known that the reasoning behind his upset was that it was the childhood he was robbed of.

Once you were dismounted his bike, he ushered you to the front door, gesturing for you to enter. Your breath caught in your throat as you looked around the home. You couldn’t help but notice all the details in this particular home, it had a large bay window with a window seat, a big open kitchen, and a breakfast nook.

“What is this?”

“It’s not done, I still have some work to do. But Wayne has been helping me put in all the things we had talked about. Upstairs we put in a clawfoot tub, and we’re working on the flooring.” He gushed.

“This is all a bit much, I uh, I…” Before you could finish, you were out the door and desperately trying to catch your breath in the front lawn.

“Hey, sweetheart, I’m sorry. I’ve been working on myself, trying to be better for you. I was gonna come to New York when the house was finished and talk to you and ask you to come home.”

“Bub, this isn’t home anymore. Hawkins isn’t my home. It never was. That’s why we planned to go to New York. Ugh! I just…fuck! You bailed on me; don’t you get that? You did the one thing that I begged you not to! You broke your promise and you let me believe that I meant nothing to you.” You sobbed.

“Sweetheart, I know I fucked this up before, but please give me another chance? I will spend the rest of my life trying to make this all up to you.” He begged.

“It’s my turn to show you something. Drive me back to Enzo’s.” You demanded.

He drove you back to the restaurant and pulled up to your car per your request. You dragged him to the trunk and opened it to reveal a folded-up canvas, a box of your art supplies and a photo storage box. You reached into the trunk and grabbed the folded canvas, slowly opening it to reveal the piece you had been working on when he had come to New York. When you opened it completely he let out a breath.

“It’s me.” He whispered.

“They all are.” You stated.

You opened up the photo bin to unveil hundreds of photos of your work, all varying portraits of the man in front of you. You looked down to your shoes, watching as you dug your toe into the gravel parking lot.

“You see, I realized something through my art. Hawkins isn’t my home. But New York isn’t either.”

“What do you mean?”

“Eddie, you’re my home.”

Let me know if you want to know what happens next!

[myfictionaldreams]

All Eyes On You // Mafia!Stucky x Fem!Reader

Summary: “Do you know what we would have done if we had turned up to that restaurant and seen you all dolled up like that? We would have bent you over the table in front of everyone and shown them exactly who you belonged to". - Steve Rogers.

Quote from my other fic titled 'The Fun Game'.

Tags: 18+ readers only, smut, threesome, exhibitionism, voyeurism, possessive sex, dom/sub, rough sex, table sex, praise kink, deep throat, throat bulge, creampie, multiple orgasms, sir kink, oral sex, size kink/difference, hints of subspace

Words: 4k

my masterlist 📚 AO3 Link

“How far away are we Sam?” you asked your bodyguard from the back seat.

“Only a couple more blocks, Boss Lady. Not much longer”, he remained calm to try and counter the anxiety that seemed to be rolling off of you.

“Ok, thank you”. Taking in a deep breath you allowed it to loosen the tense muscles throughout your body for a moment before releasing it out of your nose. The moment's peace only lasted for that, as your stresses went to other areas such as your palms began to sweat as you mentally cursed yourself for not remaining calm.

Adjusting your dress for what felt like the 50th time that evening, you looked out the window, beginning to recognise the area as close to your destination.

You were late—more than late. In fact, it was past the point of being fashionably late and you were beginning to look straight-up rude now, but it hadn’t been entirely your fault.

Ok… this was a slight lie as you had woken up late from a nap, rushing to finish your make-up and get dressed before meeting Sam in the car outside of your home where he laughed at your rushed expression.

“It’s fine sweetheart, we’re only a few minutes late”. This was true until one of the tyres went flat and then there was the traffic which was horrendous.

Of course, you’d called Steve explaining what was happening and he was swift to calm your nerves, “It’s fine beautiful, don’t rush, we aren’t going anywhere. Can’t wait to see you…”. His voice was low as he spoke through the phone, it was the type of tone that had your thighs clenching together and anticipating pumping through your veins.

Today, was your weekly, “fancy date” - as Bucky referred to it. Where the boys wanted to take you out to the beautiful restaurant that Steve had shares in, and knew the owner as well as the chefs. It was famous throughout Brooklyn for its reputation, only the highest of nobility could book a table and even then, it had to be done months in advance. But due to Steve’s connections, every week the exact same table was booked in the centre of the room, underneath the exaggerated crystal chandelier, a pianist in the corner and a scattering of other tables surrounding yours.

But now, you were late for the first time ever, having always been the punctual one in the relationship, it filled you with dread to be late. Not only this but you just wanted to be with them both already because they’d been out from the crack of dawn, attending meetings and phoning manufacturers.

“Here we go”, Sam’s voice snapped you out of your thoughts as he parked right outside of the restaurant. Your bodyguard and friend promptly exited the car and opened your car door, holding a hand out to help you to also climb out of the car.

“I’ll catch you tomorrow, Boss Lady”, he then announced after opening the front door for you to enter. As you were now with Steve and Bucky, the building was always being scouted by guards and was safe for Sam to go and enjoy his evening off. Giving Sam a quick hug before he left, you finally walked further into the restaurant until you found the waiter at the entrance to the seating area.

“Right, this way Mrs Rogers-Barnes”. Your cheeks warmed at the name.

You weren’t married to either of the boys yet and they loved to tease you with the possibility of this in the future but for now, it was more something they loved to call you to show just who you belonged to, showing their possessive side.

Rubbing your hands anxiously together, you refrained from running across the room to take those few seconds off as you finally caught sight of Steve and Bucky, sitting patiently and waiting in their usual seats. Releasing the breath you hadn’t noticed that you were holding and wiping your palms against your dress, Steve’s eyes soften as he saw you behind the waiter.

“Hey, I’m so so sorry I’m late”, you were quick to rush out as the waiter left the three of you for a moment. Both of your boyfriends stood, placing their drinks on the table as you stared up at them, smiling sheepishly with embarrassment about the situation. But soon, that smile was fading away as you took in their stare.

It was almost predatory, your instincts were to look down at your dress, thinking maybe it had come undone. However, you found that it was all perfectly in place, completely hugging your body perfectly as it had been handmade and purchased as a gift from Bucky. It didn’t even reveal that much, stopping just before your knees so that couldn’t be why they were looking at you like they were able to gobble you up.

Pushing past the submissive instinct to look away from the stare, your eyes flicked up between Steve and Bucky, waiting for them to say anything. They were not rushing to make any moves however as they simply stared at you, taking in every single detail.

This gave you the opportunity to do the same with both men as Bucky wiped the corner of his mouth with his metal thumb, his eyes lingering on your heeled feet. Steve had forgone his jacket that now lay over the back of his chair, leaving him in a crisp white shirt, the top two buttons undone exposing some whisps of chest hair. Both sleeves were rolled up to his elbow, the muscles of his forearms tense and the black harness of his gun holster strapped tightly across his chest, not hiding his guns from the other patrons.

Then there was Bucky, wearing a slim-fitting black shirt that was unbuttoned the same amount as Steve, exposing the chain from his dog tags and a black and white checkered blazer to match his trousers, something you had bought him a few weeks ago for his birthday and your mouth was almost watering taking them both in. They were breathtakingly gorgeous and hulky, spending a lot of their time working out so they could easily beat up people that pissed them off but that came with the job role of being in a mafia gang.

Your body was beginning to react in a different way, core clenching in arousal, legs automatically squeezing together to try and rub against your clit to ease some tension. A move that Steve noticed immediately, the corner of his lip flicking up in a smirk before leaning towards his friend, whispering in his ear which set his friend into motion as you watched Bucky strut past, heading in the direction of the entrance where the waiter stood.

Turning back towards Steve, you jumped slightly as he finally took a step closer to you. Even though you were in heels, your neck had to strain back to look up at his abnormally large height. He and Buck were always the two to tower over everyone around them and it was something that you adored the most.

Steve’s ocean-blue eyes smoothly danced across your face, inspecting every pore almost. It made you feel slightly self-conscious, even if his stare continued to become more intense but you lost your cool, once again submissively glancing towards the floor and admiring the shine in his shoes.

“Don’t I get a kiss or something? Or am I in trouble for being late?” You had attempted to sound like you were joking but it came out as a whispered inquiry. Biting your lip on instinct, you finally found the courage to look up into his handsome face, freshly shaved and he was close enough that his expensive aftershave had your insides warming in a different way.

Before Steve could answer, Bucky returned standing directly behind you, bumping his chest against your back.

The waiter had returned with him and began to clear the table of the glasses, cutlery, napkins and even the candle in the middle until only the white tablecloth was left.

Your heart began pounding in your ears as you watched the waiter closely, only being forced to look away as Steve lifted his hand, finally touching you with a single finger underneath your chin, making you look directly at him.

“Tell me what your safe words are”.

A heavy breath rushed past your lips, fanning across his face, your eyes becoming unfocused slightly. Oh, so this was the kind of night you were having.

“Red, yellow, and green. If I can’t talk, three taps”. Your voice was low as your pussy throbbed, knowing what was coming.

Steve was very much an exhibitionist, loving knowing more than showing off what was his and on many occasions, would simply pull up your dress and fuck you no matter the audience, whether it was in the car with Sam or other gang members, or in the middle of a restaurant, he didn’t care. 

This was also why he paid so much money into this particular business, to pay people off on what they saw. It wasn’t a weekly occurrence that he was fucking you in front of everyone but it was also thrilling, especially with how possessive Steve and Bucky got in moments like this.

Steve nodded briefly at your correct terms. Bucky then shifted even closed behind you, lowering his mouth until it was hovering next to your ear. “Tell me Doll, what name did they use at the door?”

Once again your skin warmed, looking over your shoulder at Bucky, admiring for a moment his fresh buzzed haircut before giving him the answer he wanted. “Mrs Rogers-Barnes”.

Bucky groaned as soon as the words spilt past your lips, he pecked your cheek once and then continued, “That sounds so good coming from your mouth… I want everyone to know who you belong to”.

His stare was intense down at you, eyes continuing to flick down towards your parted lips, watching as you breathed the words, “I’ll always belong to you both”.

Steve then began to run a finger down your soft cheek, making you look at him and away from Bucky, “Yeah? Say it again”.

You made sure to speak slowly, emphasising each word, “I belong to you and Bucky. I am yours”.

Steve’s chest vibrated as he released a deep groan, his trousers tenting at your beautiful voice, eyes darkening slightly in the low light of the room. Your heart was pounding in your chest, absolutely loving seeing them both like this, like you were the only thing they cared about in the world as if they were holding onto a thin thread that once snapped, they’d go absolutely feral on you.

“Damn right you’re ours, and everyone in this goddamn building is going to know about it”, Steve finally growled out. Then he was kissing you, or more, possessing your mouth with his, dominantly, feverishly and breathlessly.

With one hand resting heaving against your hip, the other glided over your jaw, gripping it and tilting so that he was completely in control of the kiss, tongue pushing into your mouth, ready to explore and taste everything that made you, you.

Your chest ached from needing air but you didn’t pull back, needing to feel his body on yours, trying to keep up with the way his lips were moving against yours in a bruising pressure. Both of your hands eagerly gripped onto his shirt, creasing the material but wanting to feel the abs beneath, moaning from the back of your throat as his teeth scraped your bottom lip.

Then Bucky was joining. His hands circled your body to reach for your hand, tugging them away from Steve and behind your back, easily holding the both in one of his larger hands. This gave him the perfect position to grind his hips against yours, his cock now in line with your hands so that you could feel his throbbing cock trapped in his pants, your instinct to squeeze was met with a desperate groan from the man.

Kissing along your exposed shoulder, he muttered, “Dirty girl, do you like feeling how hard you make me?”

With Steve’s tongue still twisting and exploring your mouth, you were unable to answer, instead, you moaned and squeezed him again in response. His noises were spurring you on, wishing to feel more of him, hear most of his desperate sounds of arousal that only caused yours to increase, knowing that you were the reason he felt like this.

Steve finally pulled back enough for you to greedily gasp in the air, his tongue sensually licking your lip one last time before pushing your head back further, giving him the perfect opportunity to lick the entire column of your neck. Your lips tingled from the assault, your eyes had closed on the initial impact and you kept the closed, savouring the warmth and solid bodies you were surrounded by.

“Fuck I want to taste you so bad,”  Steve admitted desperately, returning to hover over your lips.

“Then taste me” you encouraged, wanting this just as badly.

“I will but later, I want- no NEED, to be inside your sweet cunt right now. All day it’s all I’ve thought about, watching my cock pumping in and out of your warm, wet hole”.

All you managed to was mewl in response, in between your legs dampening further as Steve lifted the edges of your dress up to your hips before easing your panties down your legs, helping you to step out of them.

The mafia leader didn’t waste another second before easily manhandling your body, turning you on the spot until you were facing the table, pushing on your shoulders, and bending you over. 

Your skin instantly cooled with now being immediately surrounded by either of your boyfriends and feeling extremely exposed as your dress remained bunched at your hips. Glancing over your shoulders, you admired the way that Steve and Bucky were taking a moment to appreciate your dripping pussy that was on full display for them.

As you watched them, you tried to not let your eyes trail over to the latitude of people also in the room with the three of you. There were the other guests, eating and drinking, as well as the servers, the cooks, the musician and the managers. So many eyes.

But you simply did not care. They would leave if they wanted to but also, you knew that Steve had a special connection with this place, giving hefty payouts and only allowing certain people to book on the days that the three of you were attending. This was all to fuel the addiction of exhibiting you off to everyone, needing people to know that you were only Steve and Buckys.

“So fucking beautiful”, Steve praised, almost drooling at the sight before him. “Open your legs a bit wider for me baby”, he encouraged, knocking his foot against yours.

You opened the stance of your legs so that he could stand between them. Then he unzipped his pants, gasping under his breath as he squeeze his shaft a few times, “Gonna make you mine, make sure that everyone knows that you are mine”. And with his last word, Steve’s tip was slipping through your folds and pushing into your hole. No foreplay, no teasing, just straight into it.

“Oh, fuck”, you gasped as there was a mix between pleasure and pain as you stretched around his cock. He was so big as he kept pushing inch after inch in.

Steve’s hand was on the top of your back, keeping you pushed down against the table that was thankfully screwed to the floor, having made the mistake of fucking so hard on it before that it had skidded across the floor. “You’re taking me so well baby girl, relax for me, just a little bit more”.

Releasing another heavy breath to try and relax the tension throughout your body, your greedy cunt took nearly all of him until his tip was brushing against your cervix. You wanted to tell him how good it felt, to be stretched around him, to feel him throbbing inside of you but you couldn’t muster up the words.

Steve took a second to look down at where your bodies were joined before finally beginning to thrust slowly in and out, attempting to give you time to adjust properly but as you let out a particularly high-pitched mewl, something within him snapped. The mafia leader began to fuck you, animalistically, hips snapping viciously against yours, your hips almost definitely going to have bruises beneath the skin with the way your body was being propelled into the table.

You were in blissful heaven, wanting nothing more than just this, feeling his heavy balls slapping against your clit, your walls clamping around his member as he smacked a quick hand against your arse cheek.

With the enthusiasm of the way you were being fucked, sweat began to form and drip over your body, causing the beautifully styled make-up on your face to melt into the white sheet that you were laying on. Once again though, you didn’t give a single fuck, becoming even louder with your desperate moans, even more so than the piano that was continuing to be planned in the corner of the room. In fact, the restaurant was continuing to run as usual, people still eating and drinking, not risking the wrap of either Steve or Bucky, they could only watch, but this was it.

Steve continued to pound into your cunt, hitting every beautiful spot that had you seeing stars. Bucky then knelt next to your head by the table, watching intently at your face, not that you could see with your eyes closed in pleasure, eyebrows knitted together in concentration and mouth gaped open to not hold back the beautiful sounds you wanted to admit.

The tightening was suddenly overpowering in your core, the release teething on the edge as you smacked your hand on the table. “Steve, Sir, please don’t stop”.

“Cum for me honey”, he encouraged out of breath, his hair sticking to his forehead from the amount of energy he was using. Your thighs clenched as you came hard, screaming out as your cunt fluttered around his cock, muttering Steve’s name repeatedly.

You weren’t even given a second to gather your breaths before Steve was pulling his cock out, once again manhandling your body with his large rough hands, turning you over so that you were now laying on your back across the table. Your head was leaning off of the edge of the table so you raised it up, looking at Steve as he positioned your legs up his body, feet resting against your shoulders.

Then Steve was fucking you again, just as voraciously as before, hands holding onto your thighs to keep them in place and give him something to pull back on with each of his thrusts. You admired the way he looked, tips of his cheeks now tinged with pink, muscles bulging under his holster and shirt, face completely overwhelmed with lust.

An ultra-cool hand was suddenly tilting back your head over the edge of the table so that you were now looking upside down at Bucky’s cock that he’d pulled out of his trousers. Instinctively, your mouth opened, knowing exactly what was coming and what you wanted.

“Gonna make me feel good, Mama?” Bucky asked, his voice husky and thick.

“Yes, please”. Your boyfriend groaned at your polite response, sliding his cock into your mouth. In this position, it was difficult to take control of the blowjob, instead trying to concentrate on sucking on the girthy member, feeling the veins popping and tasting the precum that was already leaking from the tip.

Working in time with Steve, Bucky made was in complete control as he thrust into your mouth, grunting in pleasure as he pushed your throat to the very limit, seeing it bulge before pulling out and allowing you to breathe.

You were dizzy with your head being in this position and the absolute domination of Steve with your cunt, continuing to fuck you hard. The adrenaline was pumping as you had to concentrate on your breathing but the overwhelming pleasure that was being pumped into you was almost blinding and eliminating all rational thoughts from your mind.

Steve was also quick to remind you between thrusts, “You’re ours, only ours!” He became more frantic and you knew he was going to cum, and as his hips suddenly stuttered, he released one of your thighs in the process, your leg flopping to the side giving him more space to rub against your clit.

Steve's hot cum was pumping into you, soaking your walls as you too were pushed over the edge, your convulsing cunt helping to milk Steve’s cock. This only caused your throat to constrict along with the rest of your body and without being warned, his orgasm came as a shock to him as well as Bucky was too spurting cum into your body which you rushed to swallow on instinct.

As he eased out of your mouth, tears had begun to leak out of the corners of your eyes, completing the cock-drunk look that had taken over you. 

“Easy Doll,” Bucky soothed as he helped you to sit up, holding up your body as the blood rushed from your head, Steve’s hands wandered up your thighs as he remained in position but your legs were now hanging off of the edge of the table.

Steve bent down first, kissing your cheek to bring you back to the moment, asking, “Do you want to stay here, or go home?”

“Go home”, was your honest answer.

Steve easily tucked himself back into the restraints of his pants, shouting to the manager, “Kyle, we’ll take our food to go”. Then in a much softer voice to Bucky, “Take her to the car, I’ll join you in a minute.”

As Steve moved away, Bucky replaced where he stood, still holding you up as you swayed slightly from the hard fucking session, you could feel the cum dripping out of you and onto the table and onto your thighs. Still not risking the glance around the room to see if people were staring, your eyes were glued to a button on Bucky’s chest instead.

“You ok, hot mama?”, Bucky asked with a hint of concern etched to his beautiful features, eyebrows raised slightly.

“Yeah”, your voice was only just audibly to him and you made the effort to look up into his eyes, the sight calming as he looked at you like you were the only thing that mattered in the world. You were feeling a little bit spacey so seeing his emotions so visible on his face, helped to ground you slightly. “I... I don’t think I can walk”.

“That’s ok, I’ve got you honey”, his face physically relaxed as he leaned in to kiss your temple, taking off his jacket to pull around your shoulders whilst also helping to pull your dress back down. Once you were covered, he eased a hand under your knees, a hand on your back to pick you up into his arms. 

You gripped his neck tightly, hiding your face as the two of you left the restaurant, moving towards the car that waited for you three. Bucky helped to ease you into the back of the car, easing the seatbelt across your chest before sliding in next to you.

“Hey Romanoff, just waiting on the boss”,  Bucky greeted his bodyguard Natasha from the driving seat. She nodded her head before turning in her seat to look at you, smirking widely through her dark lashes.

“Hey sugar, have a good meal?” Natasha teased causing you to smile and flush.

“I don’t quite think I’ve had my fill yet”, you joked back, grasping Bucky’s arm for comfort and warmth. The red-haired women’s smirk broadened into a grin before she faced forward. You got on well with Natasha and enjoyed having her around as much as you did Sam.

Leaning your face against Bucky’s arm, you breathed in deeply, savouring in his aftershave, ready to eat and be naked once you all returned home.

[amourdivine]

PAC ઉ YOUR CURRENT ENERGY!

Hello, lovelies, I know it has been some time, but I missed you. I hope everyone is doing ok these days. Let's look into your energy today, shall we?

paid readings are closed as of february 2024

none of the images are mine unless stated otherwise!

pick a card masterlist & information

the piles.

1 → 2 3 → 4

how to choose your pile.  take deep breaths for a few minutes & look at each and every one of the piles separately. see which one brings you to a feeling, a place or a memory. take your time and feel free to come back to it later.

amourdivine. 2021 - 2024 © do not copy, redistribute or edit my content.

disclaimer. this is a general reading! tarot is a divination tool & is not a substitute for medical and professional advice, nor is it meant to be taken as such. i do not take responsibility for any choice(s) made by you or others regarding my readings.

PILE ONE

queen of cups ✧ death ✧ ace of swords ✧ the high priestess

Before I shuffled, I couldn’t help but feel lonely, like there’s this pang in my chest whenever I think of life and the current state of the world. It reminds me of the term “loneliness epidemic” and how so many of us are struggling to make friends or maintain pre-existing relationships. I think you are beginning to find emotional fulfillment in different things than you did before. Nothing may have worked out - at least, the things that used to work out aren’t working out anymore. There’s this voice inside of you begging for a new beginning, for clarity, and it’s slow but surely coming towards you. Where your energy is will wildly depend on how much you’ve listened to that inner voice already, but it’s a calling towards something new, regardless.

I think you’re scared because you haven’t done this before. You may be discovering things about yourself as well that are quite surprising, like new hobbies or gifts. It’s refreshing too, both painful and refreshing. Sort of like the concept of growing pains - growing up is not easy and there are no guidelines, no roadmaps. Often, we discover things through trial and error. 

You may have withdrawn your energy as well, especially from old social circles. I get the feeling you were unsatisfied. Things felt stuck. They may still feel stuck, boring and completely lost in the routine of it all. It’s okay. You’re growing. Bones can hurt when they heal and grow. The same goes for you. I see snakes here, shedding their old skin. In your case, I don’t think you have found a “new skin” already, but you’ve shed your old life either way. It’s okay to want more, pile one. It’s okay to change. We’re ever-evolving. What suited you then won’t suit you now, that’s how life goes, with the changing of the seasons. It’s beautiful to witness - and when you look back you’ll realize just how much we can shift, how many places we’ll go and how much more there is to life than our old selves.

It’s okay to let it go. You’ll be okay even if the waters are muddy for now.

This is a very spiritual pile! Make sure to cater to your emotional and spiritual needs, taking care of your physical body and being around soothing, comforting or quiet places while you tend to this new self.

channeled messages & songs: white snakes, ring, scarf, life path 8 (or 8 in general), silver jewelry, bodies of water, sleeping, bed-rotting, kundalini awakening, modern loneliness by lauv, scorpio, pisces and cancer, hermitting, social batteries, introvert, epiphany, books, the bible, prophetic dreams, chocolate, ego death. 

PILE TWO

six of cups ✧ the hanged man ✧ eight of cups ✧ seven of wands

You are returning to yourself, it feels like a sort of homecoming. Fighting for your peace while, at the same time, learning to accept what you can’t control. You have walked away from old beliefs, from restraints of the past and renewing your faith in yourself. Even the picture you’ve chosen is a close-up of someone’s outfit walking away. You’ve found dignity and you’re not willing to sacrifice it anymore. Maybe you’ve left a situationship or relationship that was draining you, molding you into someone you weren’t. Props to you for that. It’s not easy and I know it.

Your guides are proud - they’re very serious and regal. They think you deserve more than what you’ve had. Not in a self-serving way, don’t mistake it for self-indulgence, but in a human, dignified way. They see you as royalty, too. They don’t want you to settle for breadcrumbs in life anymore. No matter how difficult it’s been, they don’t want you to stop believing that things can get better.

For most of you, this is a time when you’re shifting into a more peaceful but assertive phase. You’re taking charge of your joy, your future and your responsibilities without clinging to self-blame or guilt. Maybe it took you a long time. I heard “recovery” in my mind and this has possibly something to do with a specific illness or disease you’ve battled for so long. There’s a huge feeling of relief, of taking a long breath after a tiring day. 

It’s okay, you’re home now, you’re safe now. You can relax. You’ve got this, pile two.

channeled messages & songs: therapy, journaling, barbie or baby doll, sage green, green tea, pastels, tiktok, doomscrolling, healing, “i’m not the girl i used to be”, rainbow by kacey musgraves, self-acceptance, shadow work, “i’m still standing”, camping, nature, libra and taurus.

PILE THREE

three of swords ✧ the hermit ✧ the star ✧ queen of pentacles

Your heart is broken. Someone or something has left you to lick your wounds and tend to the bruises they gave you. You’re in pain, so much pain that it may be unbearable to wake up everyday. You’re questioning your worth, your self-esteem has crumbled.. and you don’t want anyone to find you, to see you in such a vulnerable state. All you do now is hope for better days, pray a rainbow comes after the storm because the current is heavy and has taken you astray.

Unfortunately life can’t always be what we want or expect. Allow room for these heavy emotions - this too shall pass. It’s okay to be disappointed, to feel betrayed and hurt by what happened. If the ground was pulled beneath your feet, was it ever really that solid to begin with?

This is the aftermath of something painful. And that’s okay. You can’t force yourself to feel good. In the meantime, you can take it slow, nurture the hope for better days and hold onto it. I know we tend to view hope as mostly something negative and passive, but you can take baby steps towards emotional fulfillment. The Queen of Pentacles suggests you take it slow - there is no rush to healing, nothing to be accomplished, there is nothing for you to prove. You’re human, and therefore, worthy of compassion, patience and healing. Remember the Wheel of Fortune: what comes up must go down, what goes down must go up eventually. You’ll feel better, pile three. I promise.

channeled messages & songs: taking a walk, flower pot, cacti, heartbreak anthems, olivia rodrigo, punk rock, “i’m angry all the time”, hurts like hell by fleurie, capricorn, saturn, personal year 5, backstabbing, depression, navy blue by muna.

PILE FOUR

the hanged man ✧ the hierophant ✧ six of pentacles ✧ the star

You’re learning and teaching. Giving and receiving. Letting the scales balance themselves out, remembering that balance is not always fifty fifty. All the piles have had somewhat similar themes, so I wouldn’t be surprised if you have felt drawn to either pile one or two, but this one feels like a continuation of it, so it could be that you’re transitioning from one to another. Naturally, please take only what resonates for you!

You may have found a new job, a stable relationship, a good circle of friends. You know, despite the positive feeling of these cards, I can’t help but wonder if you’re waiting for it all to crumble again, feeling like the shadows of your past are going to haunt you forever. I keep wondering if you’re okay, I keep wanting to ask you. You’re scared, you’ve got your guard up. You can’t really trust it will last - and while it’s true that it all comes and goes, you can trust nothing is ever wasted. 

Let your guard down. Not everyone has your worst interests in their heart. Maybe self-isolation suited you before, didn’t it? You weren’t used to being loved, you still aren’t. But you still deserve it. Sometimes it’s easier to endure the hard things because they’re all we expect. It’s difficult to take in the good things, isn’t it? To feel worthy of them. To realize there is more to life than survival. You’re finally living now - and that’s a good thing. Uncertainty is scary, but in a way, so is the familiarity of hurt, of unrequited lovers and callous friendships. Are you ready to be loved, pile four? You can ask for the good times as much as you want, but when it is here, you have to remember to enjoy it, to not be on the lookout for the bad things so much.

We’re rarely in control. I know it’s difficult, but that’s often a good thing. Not being in control means you can worry less. You can fret less. You can take it day by day, knowing that the outside forces will do what they must and we’re all silly little souls on a giant floating rock.

PS: You’re doing well, I promise.

channeled messages & songs: self-sabotage, nightmares, attachment issues, bulletproof by la roux, bones, candles by daughter, earrings, 2024 planner, five year plan, entj, istj, quiet singing, “the pen is mightier than the sword”, studying, sweater weather, stress cleaning, autumn girl.

amourdivine. 2021 - 2024 © do not copy, redistribute or edit my content.

[poisonpercy]

Ok just finished the 3rd episode of the show. From a completely outside perspective without comparing it to the books, it’s a fine episode. The writing does fall flat imo, and it doesn’t keep my attention. It’s also still very hard to see what’s happening when it’s supposed to be dark. When will Hollywood let dark scenes be visible again?

Ok, now for more specific thoughts:

The scene with the Oracle sucked in my opinion. Idk it just seemed so much more grander in the book. The scene in the show lacked the mystic and off putting nature of the Oracle, so it kinda just didn’t work for me. I did like that they remembered that Gabe was the voice of the Oracle in tlt, so that was nice

How Percy chooses his quest mates in the show is different in the show than in the books. This isn’t a bad thing, but I do miss Annabeth volunteering herself to be Percy’s 3rd quest mate like she does in the books. Idk I just think it really showed her eagerness to prove herself and get a quest. The show scene doesn’t do that, but I’m not mad at the change

The interaction between Grover and Percy when Percy tells Grover he was chosen to go on the quest was so cute. I love those 2 boys. Besties for life

Percy telling Luke that he thinks the drachmas are from Chuck E. Cheese was hilarious

With Luke in mind, I love how manipulative he is. Like he is so nice, but it’s because he has ulterior motives. I do like that his manipulation is not overt, so you don’t know that he’s the one that ultimately betrays Percy

I personally didn’t find the “she met a pine cone’s fate” line that Percy said funny. It honestly came off kind of rude. It’s definitely something that Percy would say in ttc when Thalia and him are beefing, but not when he finds out about her death. Percy is supposed to be kind and empathetic, and he shows so much sympathy for Thalia and her fate when he hears her story in the book. Idk just felt like that line was ooc during this moment in time

Grover’s song was so cute and funny, it had me cracking up fr

Percy trying to get all of them to vote throughout the episode is hilarious. My boy just wants to have a say in things

Annabeth grabbing all that candy was perfect. It really shows she’s just a 12 year old girl that didn’t get to experience the joys of childhood (also, I feel like overall that the show is forgetting that Annabeth is not a stoic character. Like she very much acts her age. I hope the writers let Annabeth have more personality in later episodes)

I miss the book fight sequence with the furies on the bus. It was so chaotic and there was so much tension. Percy steering the bus and crashing it and the bus exploding was perfect, and I’m sad that they got rid of that in the show. The fight scene in the show was just so underwhelming. I feel like those should be the knock out moments of the episodes but they breeze past them so fast and give no tension. It just falls flat (curse you Mickey Mouse!! I know it’s your fault!)

I do appreciate that Grover keeps trying to diffuse the fights between Annabeth and Percy. They are both his friends, and he can see why they keep butting heads. If only the 2 would listen to him

I do miss how the trio finds Auntie Em’s in the book. Like Annabeth and Percy were dumbass 1 and 2 that followed their stomachs while Grover freaked the fuck out. That was so fun. The show had Grover find and follow the smell instead which is fine, but the og scene was better imo

That being said, they guessed that it was Medusa way too quickly in the show. I like the mystery of Auntie Em’s identity in the book better tbh

“I definitely trust my mom” <- Percy exceeds the momma’s boy standards

I don’t mind the change to Medusa’s character. I actually really enjoyed her (the actresses voice is so gorgeous and calming). I like how she’s like “we’re not our parents until we choose to be them.” It really sets up the ultimate direction of the series imo

Regarding the fight scene with Medusa, it sucked. To begin with, you can hardly see what’s happening bc it’s so dark. Also there was no tension or chaos. It kind of just happened? I also didn’t like that Medusa was killed when Annabeth’s cap was on her. I know it’s because Disney probably thought the death would have been too graphic or whatever, but I would have liked to see what happened

It was cool that Percy used Medusa’s head to kill Alecto

I felt so many emotions when Grover said “He’s not like the others. He doesn’t look afraid” about his Uncle Ferdinand

The beginnings of Percy’s and Annabeth’s friendship is so good. Annabeth not taking the deal with Alecto to give Percy over and killing her sister. Percy not taking Medusa’s offer to get rid of Annabeth and Grover so he can save his mother. It’s perfect. They’re going to become each other’s chosen person and they don’t even know it yet

LMM as Hermes jump scare. Still not a fan of the Hermes casting

Anyways, overall the show just isn’t working for me. I do appreciate Walker, Leah, and Aryan because they are perfect. They are honestly doing such a great job! The writers, however, are not. I’m trying so hard to think of this show as its own entity so I can enjoy it more, but I haven’t been able to so far. Despite that, I am excited to see where the show ends up going (even if I end up not liking it)

[maleficent-cannoli]

random thoughts about dm and how it would work to have happened in the past

Ok so I agree with what everyone’s been saying about devil’s minion and the chase and all that having happened in the past, but there’s one question: why would Armand EVER choose to leave Daniel if that were the case. In the books, once the chase era starts he’s with Daniel near constantly and then eventually turns him. So what happened to make Armand leave the love of his life for several decades until Louis decided to pick the interview back up again? I mean clearly it had to be something massive.

One thing we’re all clear on about Armand is that he is incredibly controlling. He has continually shown a willingness to fuck with the memories of, as Jacob put it in the episode 6 BTS, his “kept things” just to keep them close. So why, after building a multi-million dollar prison for Louis, would he cut Daniel loose? 

At first I thought it had something to do with the theory that Armand is Alice and the line where, if that theory proves to be true, Armand essentially expresses that he refused to turn Daniel not because he loved him but because he didn’t yet trust him. But that still didn’t feel quite right because, while there is a basis in QotD for Armand denying Daniel the Dark Gift, it was always him following after Daniel and waiting for him to, as always, return. 

There was one thing Armand referenced in the original Devil’s Minion chapter about him being unable to protect Daniel from the more powerful vampires under vampire law, and I’m thinking that maybe that’s why he chose to leave him. I’ve seen a couple people suggest that the Groan might be Lestat and/or Those Who Must Be Kept being imprisoned somewhere in the tower, and while there’s a good chance that might not be the case, I do think that Akasha might have something to do with it. If Armand is currently in possession of Those Who Must Be Kept, then maybe the reason he left Daniel then but is allowing him back in now is because the situation became too volatile then but isn’t now, or so he might think given that QotD will presumably be adapted in season 4.

Ngl I’m not sure this made a whole lot of sense, it’s mostly just my random thoughts but idk

[jerzwriter]

OK @icecoffee90 , I'm banging them out now! lol Thank you for this ask, too! Once again, this is in the "better late than never" category. LOL. I hope you enjoy it.

Book: Open Heart (Book 3 Timeline) Characters: Jackie Varma, Casey MacTavish (F!MC) Rating: Teen Words: 1,087 Summary: Jackie's been giving Casey the cold shoulder and Casey's intent on finding out why. Who is at fault, and can they patch things up?

A/N: Participating in @choicesjanuary2025 - Prompt - Forgiveness. I rushed this on, so please be kind. :)

Casey sat quietly at a corner table in a coffee shop that once felt like home. She loved being back in her old neighborhood, but it felt anything but. She picked absent-mindedly at a loose cuticle as she glanced at her watch. Jackie was late. It was probably because of the rain, she reasoned, but given how odd Jackie had been acting the past few days, she couldn’t be sure.

Jackie was always direct. In fact, that was one of the things Casey liked about her. She found the sarcasm and acerbic wit that others could find offputting amusing, and she knew the woman underneath it all. Through the years, they had become the best of friends... or so she thought. It wasn’t like Jackie to ignore an issue. But she had stopped replying to her texts; she was avoiding her at work, and when she reneged on dinner last night, Casey knew it wasn’t all in her head.

The front door finally burst open, ushering in a cold breeze and there Jackie stood, looking as composed as ever. She folded her umbrella as she approached the table with her usual air of confidence.

“You made it,” Casey said with a tentative smile.

“I said I’d be here,” Jackie replied as she slid into a chair. The sharpness in her tone left Casey unsettled, but she forced herself to remain calm.

“Thanks for meeting me. I wanted to check in with you because… well, you’ve been kind of distant with me the past few days. Can you tell me what’s wrong?”

Jackie shrugged, stirring the coffee the waitress had just placed on the table. “I’ve been busy, I guess.”

“Jackie,” Casey groaned. “Come on. You’re one of my best friends, and you haven’t replied to my texts in days. We haven’t gone this long without speaking to each other since our falling out during intern year. What gives?”

Jackie leaned back in her chair, letting out a sigh of frustration. “Fine! If you want to talk, then let’s talk about this.” She pulled out her phone and tapped the screen furiously before handing it to Casey.

An Instagram post that Tobias had shared a few days before was on the screen. It was a picture of their adjoined hands as they walked along the Charles River at sunset. The caption read: “To the woman who makes every day brighter. Today, tomorrow, always.”  

Casey blinked, obviously confused. “This?” She asked. “This is what has you so upset?”

“Do you think I shouldn’t be?” Jacki replied sharply. “I’m supposed to be your best friend, and this is how you tell me?”

“Tell you?” Casey started, but Jacki interrupted.

“Did you think I wouldn’t see it? Or were you going to wait until the wedding invitations were mailed to clue me in?”

“Wedding invitations?” Casey questioned. “What are you talking about?”

Jackie was incredulous, her arms folded in front of her chest. “I don’t know... isn’t it normal to tell your best friend when you get engaged? Or is accidentally learning on social media proper etiquette nowadays?”

“Jackie,” Casey sighed. “We’re not engaged.”

Jackie’s eyes narrowed. “Then what is this?”

“It’s Tobias being... Tobias,” Casey said, rubbing her temples. “Jackie,  please! You mock him mercilessly for being whipped every chance you get... don’t you know him by now? And what in this post says we’re engaged?”

“I don’t know,” she replied defensively. “Maybe all his friends commenting how happy they are, congratulating him, or saying they knew he’d find the one eventually?”

“Yeah! Because they’re still shocked that Mr. Single-for-Life is dating me, that’s all!”

Jackie stared at her, not entirely sold. “All right, so what’s this?” she pointed to a sapphire ring on Casey’s finger, the same ring that adorned her finger in the Instagram post.

“This?” Casey scoffed. “Tobias bought this for me when we were in St. Thomas. He saw me admiring it and surprised me, but it’s not an engagement ring! It’s not even a diamond; what made you think it was?!”

“Well, you! You always said you didn’t want a traditional diamond ring!”

“No,” Casey rolled her eyes. “I said I like it when people use other gemstones, but I didn’t say that’s what I wanted. And please, have you met his mother? Do you think Vivian Carrick will allow her son to propose to me with anything but a diamond?”

Jackie sat back, slightly abashed. “You’ve got a point there. Besides, if you had gotten engaged, I’m sure I would have heard Vivian screaming all the way from DC.”

“Exactly!” Casey concurred. “Come on, Jackie! Do you really think I’d get engaged and not tell you?”

“So, what you’re saying is, I’ve been simmering over this for three days... for no reason at all?”

“Mmm-hmm,” Casey smirked. “Feeling pretty dumb right about now, aren’t you?”

Jackie leand onto the table. “This is all Carrick’s fault!”

“Uh, how?”

“Look, I don’t hate the man, but if he weren’t such a pathetic simp, none of this would have happened.”

“Oh, yeah, that’s the reason,” Casey laughed. “It’s not because you overreacted and didn’t just ask me like a normal person would.”

“Shut up,” Jackie spat, sipping her coffee to hide her embarrassment. “Maybe I should hate him.”

Casey chuckled softly. “You may as well because he actually thinks you do.”

“Wait, what?” Jackie’s lips curved into a smile, and her laughter filled the quiet space. “Why does he think that?”

“Come on, Jackie! Not everyone is used to your delightfully snarky disposition. It’s an acquired taste. I know for a fact the man has lost sleep over it.”

“Good!” Jackie said, her smirk widening. “Let him believe that it will keep him on his toes.”

Casey reached out and squeezed Jackie’s hand. “You should come and spend more time with us. You’re welcome at our place anytime. You’re my best friend, and just because I moved out doesn’t mean I don’t want to see you.”

Jackie softened, though she rolled her eyes. “Don’t get all sentimental on me, MacTavish. I might throw up.”

“I’ll try to keep it in check,” Casey grinned, feeling better than she had in days.

“Good. Now, tell your boyfriend to cool it with the mushy shit before people start thinking you’re expecting twins.”

“People, or you?” Casey laughed.

The two women fell back into their usual rhythm and spent the rest of their time catching up, ribbing each other, and promising never to let a misunderstanding come between them again.

@choicesficwriterscreations @opnheartfanfics

Tagging others separately.

[smutracha]

Vellichor I

Mafia!SKZ Yandere!SKZ afab!reader POLY!SKZ 

tw: violence, blood, guns, knives, nicotine, drug abuse, alcohol, ptsd

Vol 1 Vol 2 Vol 3 Vol 4 Vol 5 Vol 6 Vol 7 Vol 8 Vol 9 Vol 10 Vol 11 Vol 12 Vol 13

Third person POV:

Y/n loved the smell of this little bookstore she visited every Saturday and Sunday afternoon, the smell of coffee wafting past her as she sat under the magnificent cherry blossom tree with her new book of the week. This same tree that had sheltered her in rain and covered her in petals while she was just a student and new to the country and even now as an adult.

And when she abandons her beloved tree, he knows it is not for long. She will be back with a fresh tea and a pastry, and for him a brand new poem. So, he watches her go.

“She is heading back into the bookstore, boss. I really got to tell you I do not think there is any reason to be watching her.” “It will dawn on you all the longer you watch her.” “I’ve been watching her for 6 months, she’s beautiful but what’s with the obsession.” “Just wait.”

“Y/n you know most kids your age go out drinking and drink coffee more than anything else, and why you insist on looking after that rickety old tree I don’t understand.” “Aunty, you know I grew up reading books back home, every second I had away from school would be spent reading. I love it. It’s an escape that I need. And so, when I moved to Korea and found this place and that beautiful tree, and when I saw that you sold the rooibos we sell back home, well I fell in love. This became my escape. And that tree became my friend. The hominess of this place makes me feel almost at home, like my soul is home.”

And after she returns to the tree with a poem and tea, she sits quietly, pondering a thing or two…

“Hey, I like rooibos tea too” “You know Innie, you suck at stealth” “Where’d you two come from?” “Oh, nowhere really” “You are so dumb” “I HEARD THAT YOU DOG”

“Are you guys ok?” “We’re fine.” “Just here to enjoy the scenery.” Oh, then sure sit with me. You want my tea?” “Yes please.” “Seung, you can’t just take her tea.”

And in silence the girl read poetry to the tree while the two mysterious boys watched. And when she stopped she announced her resignation.

“We should walk you home.” “Yes, a woman should never be alone at night.”

“Say what is your command captain?” “Okay, you’re sweet. Follow me boys.”

They walked for a while, deciding outside of a convenience store that late night snacks and soju would be an amazing idea.

A little further up the road they got to a tiny but cosy loft apartment, briming with greenery and books. Simple and earthy. That is what y/n is. That is why all this fuss about her existed, they got it now. They knew now, tonight they would see the way they needed her.

She went to put her TV on. Some show about a mother and daughter who drank loads of coffee came on, she insisted that Gilmore Girls was the basics of comfort shows. They decided that she was right, because this was her and she would be right in anything she declared to them. 2 bottles of soju later and she was gone, of course Innie and Seung only had like 2 shots each. So, while Seung was getting her settled in and comfortable Innie called the boss.

“Oh yes tell that pretty boy Jisung m with her right now. She is so beautiful when she is asleep, wonder what her lips feel like… who knows? Oh well, we will be staying over here to look after her and clean up. Y’all can meet her tomorrow. But God hyung, you were right about her.”

[justagalwhowrites]

Lavender - Ch. 21

When someone you dread comes to the QZ, Joel takes matters into his own hands. A continuation of Lavender Ch. 1-20 found on Tumblr here.

Pairing: Joel Miller x Female Reader

Warnings: Description of past SA, PTSD response, torture. No use of Y/N. 18+ only, minors DNI!

Length: 7.2k

Friday, April 17, 2015 - Four Years Later 

“So you’re not going to be Dr. And Mr… Fuck, what was his name again?” Andrew snapped off a bite of jerky. 

“His first name was Simon,” you said. “I’m not actually sure if I ever got his last name.” 

“So you’re not going to be Dr. And Mr. what’s-his-name why?” 

“Because he had a weird problem with the fact that he’d sometimes have to share a bed with my best friend,” you shrugged. 

Jess groaned. 

“He was fine with it at first when he assumed the best friend had a vagina and he thought he could finagle a three way out of it,” you said, taking a drink of water. “Got a little less OK with it when I said the name Andrew…” 

“You guys don’t even do that much anymore!” Jess said. You and Andrew both looked at her for a moment. She sighed. “You do that every time I go outside the QZ don’t you.” 

“It’s like you don’t know me at all,” Andrew kissed her temple. She sighed, leaning into him. 

“Almost like he’s attached to his wife and has a hard time coping when she’s out dealing with the end of the world,” you said. “He’s just strange that way…” 

She rolled her eyes. 

“Who knew I’d be a part of the codependency club…. Well, hopefully now that the new batch of guards are coming in they won’t need me as much,” she sighed. “They’re supposed to be getting a few other people who are equipped to go help with field psych evaluations with this bunch…” 

“I’ll believe it when I see it,” Andrew muttered. “They’re only after muscle, they don’t give a shit about anything else.” 

“Isn’t this group supposed to be pretty big, though?” You asked. “We’ve got Marta coming in to help with processing for health screenings in like an hour…” 

“You say that like it’s not going to just be more goons,” Andrew said. “With all the shit that’s going on… There was a shoot out just a few blocks away the other day. FEDRA’s losing their grip.” 

“They ever bug the clinic break room we’re going to be next on the executioner’s block,” you muttered. 

“Makes me nervous, talking about this stuff here,” Jess said. “No one likes it but…” 

You were quiet for a minute. 

“Any other dates coming up soon?” Jess changed the subject. “I still liked Sean…” 

“He did stick around for a bit,” Andrew nodded. “He lasted, what, four months?” 

“Yup,” you nodded. “I liked him, too. But, you know…” 

They didn’t respond. They didn’t need to. Sean had said “I love you” and had expected to hear it back. You just weren’t comfortable lying to him. He didn’t stick around long after that. 

“Nothing on the books yet,” you shrugged. “We’ll see what happens.” 

“You’re just going to end up fucking Tommy again,” Jess narrowed her eyes at you. 

“Yeah, I don’t know if I should be proud of you for figuring out how to have casual sex or if I should be frustrated with you figuring out how to do it with just one person,” Andrew said. You glared at him. “Don’t get me wrong, it’s very on brand for you…” 

“Hey,” you cut him off. “Why are we talking about my sex life? I don’t get to talk about your sex life…” 

“Ours is boring,” Jess shrugged. “Yours is way more fun.” 

You weren’t sure if fun was quite the word you’d use for it. 

Yes, you’d managed to branch out a bit since your split with Tommy. It took a few months but, when a guy in line for rations had asked if you wanted to hang out sometime, you’d said yes. Sure, you ended up having nothing in common with him but it was a start. Something you were now comfortable doing. Now you were having dates somewhat regularly. Even if you weren’t always sure you understood the point of it. 

You’d only been broken up with Tommy a few months when he showed up at your door late one night, just before curfew. You were already in bed when he knocked on your door. You frowned. Even months later, you recognized the knock. You all but jumped out of bed and tore the door open. 

“Hey Kid,” he gave you his signature, cocky smile. His bicep was bloody. 

“Of course you’re bleeding,” you sighed, opening the door. He smiled sheepishly but came inside. “You’re always fucking bleeding.”

He sat on your bed where he always had as you’d stitched him up and shrugged out of his shirt, hissing as the fabric passed over the cut on his arm. You gathered the supplies and turned on enough lights that you could see what the fuck you were doing. 

“Who’d you piss off this time?” You asked, cleaning the knife wound. It was jagged. 

“The usual,” he said. “Believe it or not, this isn’t how I wanted to see you again…” 

“Weird that you still go out and get into trouble then,” you muttered, checking the wound before starting to suture. 

“I’ve been thinking about coming by, saying hi for a few weeks,” he said. “Missed you. Weird not seein’ ya all the time. This was just… the push I needed.” 

“Everyone else OK?” You asked, glancing up at him. 

“Fine,” he said. “Tess made it out unscathed. Joel’s leg is better. He just got decked in the face this time out, which he probably deserved for somethin’ else stupid he’s done lately.” 

You laughed a bit at that. 

“Probably did.” 

By the time you’d stitched him up, it was past curfew. 

“I can take the couch,” he said, but you waved him off. 

“We shared a bed for a year,” you replied. “Just shower first, you’re gross.” 

You were reading when he climbed into bed beside you. 

“Kind of a weird place to ask it but, think we could be friends?” He said. “Meant it when I said I missed you. Don’t expect anything else but I’d like to be friends.” 

You looked at him for a second, the shadow of familiar longing in you. You ignored it. 

“I’d like to be friends, too.” 

And you were just friends, for a while. It took some adjustment but you liked Tommy as a friend. He was funny, he shared a lot of the concerns you had about FEDRA and what was going on in the world, he was unfailingly kind. 

A few weeks after you broke up with Sean, the two of you were sitting on your couch, watching a movie Tommy had found on his last trip outside the QZ, Cruel Intentions, something you’d never bothered to see before. You liked it well enough but the sex scenes… you hadn’t had sex since the split with Sean. The scenes were making you fidget on the couch, rearranging yourself to try to get some kind of relief from the ache between your legs. 

The movie finally, mercifully, ended and Tommy looked at you. 

“Proposition,” he said. 

“Shoot.” 

“We have sex.” You raised your eyebrows, he pressed on. “As friends. We’ve already done it, I have a good time, you have a good time…” 

“You’ve just got a one track mind,” you rolled your eyes at him. 

“No,” he said. “I can just tell when you’re turned on and I’m tryin’ to be a gentleman.” 

You glared at him. 

“No strings, no pesky feelings, just sex when we both want it,” he said. “That’s it.” 

You thought for a second. Could you do that? You supposed the last time you’d had sex with Joel it had been just sex. You’d kind of hoped it would be more but you knew that it wouldn’t be. 

“Just sex?” You asked. 

“Just sex,” he nodded. 

Just sex with Tommy turned out to be pretty damn fun. It wasn’t something you did all the time but it was enough to you from being too focused on the sex part on the rare occasions you did try to date someone new. It was easy enough to cut off when he found someone he was interested in or you did and easy enough to fall back into when you were both single again. 

It was during one of the “just sex” periods that Tommy brought you to meet some of his… friends. 

He’d just gotten back from a smuggling run and had a pack full of stuff when he showed up at your door with a broken finger. 

“Figured why try to fix it myself,” he teased you. You just rolled your eyes and let him in. 

“So I’ve been thinking,” he said slowly as you set his finger. You just raised your eyebrows at hm. “I’ve got to run this stuff to a meeting tomorrow night. You should come.” 

“What kind of meeting?” You frowned. 

“Just some like minded folk,” he shrugged. 

“You’re being awfully cagey, Miller,” you said. He shrugged again. You smirked a little. “I’m not going to a swingers club with you…” 

“Damn, killing all my dreams here, Kid,” he teased back. 

The next night, he came by the clinic as you were finishing, the pack on his back, and led you across town to a building that FEDRA hadn’t done anything with yet. 

Your body tensed. It reminded you of being outside the QZ, like a clicker or a raider was going to jump you at any second. 

“You’re OK,” he said quietly, leading you down a hall. There was a firefly insignia painted on the wall where he turned.

“Tommy,” you hissed. “Are you mixed up in…” 

“Just listen to what they have to say,” he said quickly. “It’s not what you think.” 

“Don’t know what the hell kind of death wish you have,” you muttered. He ignored you. 

The meeting was informal. It was Tommy, a handful of other people and a woman named Marlene who seemed to be running things. They didn’t seem to want to talk openly with you there, but they seemed to have enough understanding of whatever the fuck it was they were doing to not need to say much explicitly. Something told you that Tommy had mentioned bringing you along before. 

After the meeting, you hung back with Tommy and waited until Marlene was alone. 

“This is the friend I told you about,” he said, nodding at you. Marlene looked you over. 

“So you’re the doctor,” she said. 

“So they tell me.” 

“Tommy says you’re doing some research,” she said. You glanced at him. “I’d be curious to learn more.” 

“Not a lot to say at the moment,” you shrugged. “I’m trying to use some preexisting research on slowing the growth of fungal infections to see if I can develop a way to stop cordycep progression after transmission. Like an emergency injectable or, maybe someday, a vaccine. So we can have time to excise or amputate the infected tissue. I haven’t found anything that works yet, though.” 

“What if you thought a little bigger,” Marlene said. 

“Bigger.” 

“Bigger,” she nodded. “Bigger like a cure. Like it doesn’t matter if you’re bitten beyond needing some stitches. Bigger like we get our fucking planet back.” 

You laughed for a moment before you realized that she was being serious. 

“You’re talking about developing a cure for cordyceps,” you looked at her. 

“I am,” she said. “And I’d like your help. You don’t have to only develop what FEDRA wants…” 

“FEDRA barely tolerates the work I’m doing now,” you scoffed. “I’m not developing this for them, I started doing this on my own and my boss was willing to let me use some facilities to do it in…” 

“But a cure…” 

“A cure is so far beyond unlikely,” you said. “We have nothing to build a cure off of. Right now, I’m looking for a bandaid…” 

“Bandaids don’t do much for bullet holes,” she replied. 

“When you’re the one patching people up, you come talk to me about bandaids,” you snapped. “Until then, let the professionals handle it.” 

She laughed darkly. 

“Didn’t think you’d be such a supporter of FEDRA,” she said. 

“I’m not,” you replied. “I’m just a realist. I wish FEDRA just didn’t exist but they do and we’re stuck in the reality we’re stuck in. I’m not going to sit here and wait for some magical cure to manifest, I’m going to work with what I have and try to do what I can to make it better.” 

She considered you for a moment. 

“If your research pans out,” she said. “Would you consider sharing the formula with us?” 

“Yes,” you said. “Of course. I plan to give it to anyone who asks for it. A hope for survival shouldn’t be a tool for power, I don’t intend on just giving it to FEDRA to leverage as they see fit.” 

“We have a lab,” she said. “Out west. We could provide you all the support you’d need…” 

“No,” you shook your head. “No, I’m not going out there with infected and raiders if I can help it. And my life is here. My friends are here, the clinic, the kids at the school… I’m not going anywhere.” 

She sighed. 

“Well, Tommy knows how to reach me,” she said. “If you change your mind. Which I hope you do. You would be an asset to our mission.” 

Tommy walked you back to your place in silence. He stopped outside your door and you just sighed. 

“You’re being an idiot with them,” you said. “Don’t let it get you killed.” 

You doubted he listened to you.

Marta poked her head into the break room. 

“Just got word from the front gate,” she said. “They’re heading our way.” 

“That’s my cue,” Jess said, getting up and stealing a kiss from Andrew. “See you when you get home. Try not to wear yourself out.” 

“I make no promises,” he said. She rolled her eyes, waved by to you, and left. 

Andrew looked at you. 

“Ready to get fucked by FEDRA?” He asked. 

“Sounds like your average Friday to me,” you replied, cracking your neck, downing the rest of your water and heading to the exam area. 

Things went smoothly at first. Marta and Andrew divided the men up, each of them handling intake for half of the 100 or so troops FEDRA was sending in from other QZs and training facilities. Then, the men went back to the exam area where you and the other doctors and nurses did quick exams and sent them on their way. You were on your 14th exam when you knocked once on the exam room door and went inside, without paying much mind to the name on the chart. “Hello,” you said, opening the file. “I’m…” 

“I remember you.” 

You looked up. Your stomach clenched. You had to swallow to keep from vomiting. Your heart pounded. Your hands shook. It took everything you had to not run. 

You looked down at the file in your trembling hands, skipping over the first name and going to the last, even though it was burned in your memory, just like his face. 

McCarthy. 

“Always wondered if you’d made it through,” he smirked at you. “You look good, hardly know it’d been 12 years. How old were you then?” 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” your throat was dry. “I’m just here to do a quick exam.” 

“Oh, c’mon now, I know what we had was more memorable than that,” he said, looking you up and down. Your stomach turned. “Know it was for me. You had… Well let’s just say, been looking for a girl to measure up since.” 

“I just need to take some vitals,” you managed, getting the blood pressure cuff off the wall. 

You barely remembered taking his vitals. Everything sounded like a high pitched whine, you could hardly hear or register anything he said. You were hyper aware of the feel of everything in your body, of every blood vessel, every muscle, every function. Breathing took conscious effort. So did blinking, swallowing. All you wanted to do was throw up. 

After what felt like an eternity, you stepped back from him. 

“You’re all set, Officer McCarthy,” you said. 

“Have to look you up now that I’ll be in town,” he smirked. “Good to know that I can just start here.” 

You knew your eyes must look like dinner plates, so wide and afraid. He seemed to like that. 

“See you around, Doc.” 

He winked, closing the door behind him. The second he was out of the room, you locked the door and doubled over the trashcan, throwing up. Your body just rejected everything you’d eaten that day, coughing and choking in its rush to expel it. 

You’d spent the last 12 years pretending that McCarthy didn’t exist. That it had never happened. When he came to mind, you tried to shove the thoughts down, tried to avoid them, deny that there was anything to think about to begin with. 

You rinsed your mouth out in the sink and tried to keep your tears under control before you rushed out of the exam room to find Dr. Lee. 

Thankfully, he was just stepping out of an exam room when you did. 

“Lee,” you said quickly. “I need you to cover for me, I have to go home.” 

He groaned. 

“Come on, we’re slammed…” 

“I know,” you said, looking up at him. “But how often do I ask to go home early? I have to go home, I can’t…” 

He looked at you and frowned. 

“Yeah,” he said. “Get out of here.” 

You all but sprinted for the door and out into the sun. You took moment when you got outside, doubling over with your hands on your knees to catch your breath before starting your walk home. You needed to curl up under your blanket, feel safe in your own space. It seemed like you might snap in half if you didn’t. You’d just started to calm down, to get your heart to stop racing, when McCarthy stepped out from an alley and grabbed your wrist, pulling you back down it with him. 

You froze as he put your back against the wall, his arms caging you in. 

“Now I know you remember me, pretty thing,” he smirked. “I’m the guy who saved your life, the lives of those kids you were with, you wouldn’t forget a guy like me…” 

“You have me confused with someone else,” you could barely talk. He ran his nose over your cheek, smelling you. 

“Bet you still feel the same,” he said. “Bet I could find out…” 

“Please,” you choked. “I just…” 

“Hey!” 

Suddenly McCarthy’s body was pulled away from yours and Joel was in front of you. 

“The fuck is this?” He asked, facing McCarthy. Your hand went to your chest, clutching the fabric of your shirt, desperate to get your heart to slow down. “Because it looked an awful lot like you were hasslin’ this girl.” 

“No trouble,” he said. “Just… an old friend. We go way back, all the way back to the outbreak. Don’t we, Sugar?” 

Joel looked over his shoulder to you but you couldn’t bring yourself to look at him. 

“Get the fuck out of here,” Joel snapped. “Catch you botherin’ her again you’ll regret it.” 

“Careful who you talk to,” McCarthy tried to step up to him, but Joel had several inches on him. “Probably don’t want to piss off a FEDRA officer.” 

“I don’t give a shit who I piss off,” he growled. “Get the fuck out.” 

He stood there and watched him go before he turned to you. 

“Hey, Baby,” he said gently, reaching for you. You flinched back, your stomach turning. 

“Please don’t touch me,” you managed. 

“I just want to help…” he began but you cut him off. 

“I know,” you said. “But just… don’t touch me, please don’t touch me, just don’t touch me…” 

“Won’t touch you,” he said, hands up. “Promise.” 

You nodded quickly, trying to not hyperventilate. 

“Want to talk about it?” He asked, standing close enough that he could catch you if you fell, far enough that you didn’t feel like you needed to cower away from him. You managed to shake your head. “Want me to get someone? Like Andrew or Jess or… I could get Tommy.”

You just shook your head again, holding onto the wall, trying desperately to ground yourself. Joel hovered, watching you. 

“I’ll be fine,” you glanced up at him. “You don’t need to stay…” 

“Not going to just leave you here like this,” he said, voice gruff. “Especially if you won’t tell me why.” 

“Doesn’t matter,” you said, standing up straight and leaning back against the wall. You took a deep breath, closing your eyes and focusing on your diaphragm, pushing it low in your stomach to draw as much air into your lungs as you could. You breathed out slowly. 

“You left work early for it,” he said. You lifted your head off the wall and opened your eyes, looking at him. He shrugged. “I try to stay away from you. Usually safe over here right now.” 

You scoffed a little. 

“Didn’t know I made it unsafe for the big bad smuggler,” you tried to smile but you weren’t sure that it worked. Judging from Joel’s expression, it didn’t. “Really, it’s fine. I’m just going to go home, have a drink, put on some music. Maybe take a bath. I’m fine.” 

“Who was the asshole?” He asked. 

You winced. 

“I really don’t want to talk about it, Joel,” you said. “I just really don’t, OK? Please don’t make me. And please don’t say anything to anyone about it, I’d just rather pretend this never happened, OK?” 

“Tell me who he is and I’ll drop it,” he said. “Won’t tell anyone.” 

You searched his face for a moment. 

It had been a long time since you’d been this close to Joel. Probably since the night you’d walked him back to the QZ with his broken leg. 

It hadn’t been as complete of a shut out as the year before, at least. Not this time. You’d occasionally bumped into him when out running errands. He’d give you a nod of acknowledgement, which was better than you’d really expected. He’d come into the clinic once - you saw him in the waiting room - but Andrew put him with another doctor. You’d even seen him once at his apartment. You’d come by when Tommy said to meet him there, he’d said not to worry about Joel. But Joel came home as you stood in his living room, waiting for Tommy to grab the last of whatever it was he needed for whatever it was you were going to do - you’d since forgotten all that, too distracted by seeing Joel. He’d just stood there for a second, frozen, looking at you. You’d smiled tightly at him. He just went to his room, brushing past Tommy on his way by. 

His hair was starting to gray, but otherwise, he looked the same as he had for as long as you’d known him. His picture was still on your bedside table. You slipped it into a drawer if you were having Tommy over or you were seeing someone but outside of that, you had a reminder of what he looked like before beside you all the time. It still killed you to look at him, made your heart ache with missing him and who he was to you once. 

In spite of everything that had happened between you, you didn’t think he would hurt you on purpose. 

“I don’t know his first name,” you said, looking down at his feet. “His last name is McCarthy.” 

You managed to look back at his face. 

“Please, Joel,” you begged. “Don’t tell anyone, please don’t tell anyone. I just want to pretend like it never happened and I can’t… if people know I…” 

You were starting to hyperventilate again. You closed your eyes and forced yourself to take a deep breath and hold it for a moment before releasing it slowly. You looked back at Joel. 

“I’ll do just about whatever you want, just please don’t tell anyone,” you said quietly. 

“Won’t tell anyone,” he said. 

You nodded, relieved. 

“I’m walkin’ you home though,” he frowned. “In case that fucker shows up again.” 

You just nodded, not feeling up for fighting with him. You tried to gather yourself for a moment and then started off, Joel staying an almost awkward distance from you as you made your way through the QZ. Like he wanted to be close but not so close that he might risk accidentally touching you or have someone thinking you were walking anywhere together. He didn’t say anything, just looked over at you every minute or two like you were a bomb he was expecting to explode. 

“Thank you,” you said, stopping at the communal door to your building. “I appreciate your help with him. I wasn’t prepared for that, I will be now.” 

He just nodded gruffly. 

“It was…” you paused. “I don’t know if good to see you is the right word but… It was nice. Seeing you.” 

He paused, looking you over for a moment. 

“You too.” 

He crossed his arms, watching you. It took you a second to realize that he was waiting for you to go inside. You opened the door. 

“Night, Joel.” 

“Night, Kid.” 

***

Joel waited until you were inside to go lean against the building opposite yours, in an alcove where he was tucked away and largely out of sight. He was pretty certain this McCarthy fucker hadn’t followed you but he wasn’t about to take any chances. 

Whatever that asshole had done, it was bad. Joel had only ever seen you that horrified once, when a raider had his hand around your throat. The way you’d panicked when he’d reached for you… 

He ground his teeth. He needed to know what this man did to you so he could make sure it wouldn’t happen again. 

Joel stood sentry outside your apartment for hours. After the clinic closed, he saw Andrew go up, but he was only there for a few minutes. You must have lied to him, he doubted he would have left if you’d told him the truth of it. He waited until curfew was only minutes away and went home, making it inside just in time. 

“Out late,” Tommy observed, sitting on the couch. 

“Got held up,” he said. 

“Trade go bad?” He asked. 

“Turned out OK,” Joel replied. 

Tommy didn’t press. He wondered if you’d ever told Tommy whatever had happened. The two of you had stayed close after breaking up, you might have told him something you’d never told Joel… 

He could think of just one person who would almost certainly know. McCarthy had mentioned the outbreak. Andrew must know, must have some idea. 

Tommy went to bed but Joel stayed up. He’d told you that he wouldn’t tell anyone. You’d begged him not to tell anyone. But he needed to keep you safe and to do that, he needed to understand the threat. But what you didn’t know wouldn’t hurt you. 

The moment curfew lifted in the morning, Joel was out the door, walking quickly to Andrew’s. He had to pound on the door a few times and it took a few minutes for him to answer, looking half asleep. 

“Miller,” he said, stifling a yawn. “Thought I wouldn’t have to deal with your shit anymore.” 

“McCarthy,” Joel said quickly. “FEDRA guard. Name mean anything to you?” 

Andrew’s eyes went wide for a moment before he grabbed Joel by the shoulder and pulled him inside, closing the door behind him. 

“Where’d you hear that name,” he asked. He looked wide awake now. 

“Not important,” Joel said. “Who is he. What’d he do to her.” 

“He here?” Andrew growled. 

“Tell me what he did.” 

He looked Joel up and down before he laughed darkly. 

“God, you never even tried with her, did you?” He asked. “To busy with your own shit so she never told you…” 

“What did he do.” 

Andrew glanced down the hall, making sure Jess was still asleep and looked back to Joel, his voice low. 

“He fucking raped her is what he did,” he spat. Joel’s stomach twisted. “She’s never called it that, she never calls it anything. She likes to pretend it never happened but that’s what it was.” 

“What happened.” Joel’s teeth were clenched. His whole body was coiled like a spring. He needed to hit something, the energy and rage needed to go somewhere. 

“We came to a check point,” Andrew said. “Two guards, both armed, three of us. I was a kid, I was 18 but I was a kid and Jessica… She was trying to take care of us. They had guns and he told her the way to get through, made it clear he’d start shooting if she didn’t listen. She gave me the gun, told me to protect Jessica, he took her to the woods… She never told me what happened, she never talked about it. She just came out different. I should have fucking killed him, I should have shot him the second she gave me the gun…” 

Joel felt like he was going to be sick. He’d left you. You’d been alone with two children and his child inside you and you’d been forced…

“Where is he?” Andrew snarled. “I’m going to rip him apart…” 

“One of us needs to be there for her and it can’t be me,” Joel replied. “Needs to be you. She trusts you. You take care of her, I’ll take care of him.” 

Andrew looked like he wanted to fight him for it but eventually he gave him just a single, stiff nod. Joel turned to leave before he turned back to him. 

“Pretend you don’t know,” he said. “Promised I wouldn’t say anything but… Couldn’t protect her if I didn’t know what I was protecting her from.” 

“When are you doing it?” Andrew asked. 

“Today,” he said. “I’m going to hers now, make sure he doesn’t show up. I’ll get her to work OK and take care of him, dump him somewhere tonight.” 

“He shows up at the fucking clinic and I’ll kill him,” Andrew said, his voice eerily calm. “I don’t give a shit.”

Joel nodded once. This was the first time he remembered ever really liking Andrew. He could leave you in his hands at the clinic and you would be safe, that he knew. 

He all but ran to your apartment, leaning against the building across from yours, waiting for you to come downstairs. He’d been waiting for about an hour when he spotted you. You’d French braided your hair, like you were expecting a long day. You hadn’t put on ribbons. 

He caught you quickly. 

“Good morning,” he said, falling into step beside you. You nearly jumped out of your skin. “Sorry, wasn’t tryin’ to scare you.” 

“What are you doing here?” You asked, frowning up at him. 

“Making sure you get to work safe,” he said. You clearly hadn’t slept, you looked exhausted. 

“I’m fine, really,” you said, continuing on. Joel walked beside you. You frowned at him again but didn’t argue the point. He walked you to the front door of the clinic in silence, you just giving him a tight smile and a small wave before going inside. Joel found a spot near the door he could wait, make sure McCarthy didn’t come in before Andrew got there. 

Andrew spotted him on his way in, stepping over to him and keeping his voice low. 

“He probably came in with the transfer guards that showed up yesterday,” he said quietly. 

“Temp housing,” Joel said. 

“Exactly,” Andrew replied. He looked Joel up and down. “Good luck, Miller.” 

With your friend on site, Joel finally felt safe leaving you. 

Moving to hurt the man who hurt you quickly eased the tightness in his chest. He may have failed you 12 years ago but he wasn’t going to fail you now. 

He went home and got supplies. He didn’t intend to make McCarthy’s death easy. He needed to make sure he had what he needed to make it worthwhile. 

Joel stood at the edge of the small market that was near the temporary housing for FEDRA employees. He figured McCarthy would need to come through here at some point. He was right. 

Shortly after noon, McCarthy came through the stands, pondering what there was to buy. Joel waited until precisely the right moment, reaching out and grabbing the man by his collar and pulling him into a darkened alleyway. He yelped but it wasn’t loud and it didn’t take the man long to recognize Joel. 

“You again,” he smirked. “Here to apologize?” 

“Here for information,” he growled. “What did you do to her.” 

“To who?” The man smirked challenging him. 

It was a dumb move. Joel was so mad he couldn’t see straight. He grabbed the man by the throat and thrust him into the wall, hard enough to make him cough and choke. 

“Tell me,” he demanded. 

Now, the man just looked scared. He punched McCarthy hard across the face, enough to knock him out, and slung him over his shoulder, moving quickly for the abandoned building he’d spotted earlier. 

He ducked inside, going for an interior room where his screams wouldn’t be heard. 

There was a chair in the room, and old folding one. He tied the man to the chair and smacked him to bring him around. 

“What the fuck?” He looked around, straining against his ties, his eyes wide. “You don’t know who you’re fucking with…” 

“I know exactly who I’m fucking with,” Joel said. “I think it’s you who doesn’t know.”

He pulled out his knife and took the second chair and pulled it up close to McCarthy’s, getting right in his face. 

“Tell me what you did to her,” Joel said. 

“Look,” he said quickly. “It was the outbreak…” 

Joel sighed, opening the knife and shoving it into the man’s thigh. He screamed, doubling over as well as he could given his bonds. Joel smiled. 

“You’re going to tell me what you did to her,” he said. “I want to know it all. Tell me what you did to her.” 

“Please,” he whimpering now. “I swear…” 

Joel pulled a pair of pliers from his pocket. He held McCarthy’s head still as the man started begging and pleading. It fell on deaf ears. He pressed the pliers around his one of his middle teeth and pulled. 

It felt good, expending energy this way. He was taking action, doing something. It didn’t even feel like he needed to pull that hard. 

McCarthy screamed, blood pouring from his mouth. Joel gave him a moment to catch his breath, watching him bleed. He liked his blood. He wanted to see more of it. 

“What did you do to her?” He asked through clenched teeth. 

“She wanted it!” He sobbed. 

“Wrong answer,” Joel ripped the knife from his leg and thrust it into his shoulder. The man screamed again. “What did you do to her.” 

“Took her into the woods!” He screamed, panting for breath. Joel gave him a minute to pant. He could wait. 

After a minute he spoke again. 

“How did you get her to the woods, McCarthy?” He asked. The man’s eyes glistened with tears. 

“I…” his voice cracked. “I told her I could give them a code to get through the other checkpoints in exchange…” 

“In exchange for what?” Joel patted the man’s knife wound on his leg. He cried out again. 

“In exchange for sex!” He cried out. “I told her I’d trade sex for safe passage, said I didn’t know the next time I’d see a woman, I didn’t want to waste it…” 

“Did you have a gun?” Joel asked. The man looked confused. He grabbed his face, holding his cheeks harshly in his fingers, forcing him to look at Joel. “When you told her you’d trade for sex, did you have a gun?” 

“Yes,” he sobbed. “Yes, I had a gun…” 

“So you threatened her,” he said. “You threatened her and the children she was with.” 

“No,” he man moaned. “That’s not… I swear, it wasn’t like that…” 

Joel sighed and pulled the knife from the man’s shoulder before he thrust it into his uninjured leg. McCarthy wailed. 

“I threatened her!” He panted, gasping. “I knew what I was doing, I wanted her and knew how I could get it so I threatened her…” 

“And you took her into the woods,” Joel said. The man nodded. “With your gun.” He nodded again. “What did you do then?” 

“Told her to get undressed,” he groaned. “Told her she had great tits… once she was naked, told her to lie down…” 

He choked and cried. Joel sighed, reaching over and smacking his face, forcing him to look at him. 

“Then what,” Joel’s voice was harsh. 

“I…” he swallowed. He looked terrified. “I got on top of her…” His voice broke. “Please….” 

“What. Next.” 

“I put my dick in her,” he groaned. He was crying now. “I fucked her…” 

“That’s not what you did, is it?” Joel grabbed his hair, holding his face close to his own. “Call it what it was McCarthy!” He screamed it. “What did you do to her!” 

“I raped her,” he sobbed it out. Joel released his hair. 

“Where’d you touch her,” he asked. He looked confused. “You touched her when you raped her, right? Where.” 

“Her chest,” he sniffed. “Hips, waist…”

Joel remembered the parts of you that made you freeze when he touched them, parts of you that never made you freeze before. He wasn’t sure you even knew you did it. Now he knew why.

“That it?” Joel asked. He nodded. “You cum in her?” 

“Please…” 

Joel pulled the knife from his leg. 

“You don’t seem to fucking get it,” he growled, getting in his face. “I like hurting you. I want to hurt you. I don’t need much reason to but you saying please? Makes me want to hurt you more. I want to fucking flay you alive every time I hear you beg. So answer the goddamn question,” Joel thrust the knife into McCarthy’s other shoulder. “Or I will do what I want.” 

“Yes!” He cried it out. “I did, I came in her…” 

Joel sat back, panting for breath for a moment, looking McCarthy up and down. He was covered in blood. He was weak, slumped over like he couldn’t hold himself up.  

Joel wasn’t done with him. 

“You know she was pregnant when you did that?” He asked. McCarthy lifted his head just enough to look at Joel. He shook his head. “Well, she was. With my kid.” 

He stood up, rolling his sleeves up to his elbows. 

“I wasn’t there to protect her then,” he said, flexing his fingers before curling them into fists. “But I am now. Can’t let you live with what you did, McCarthy. I have to kill you for her. But when I make it hurt? That’s for me.” 

He swung, punching him in the middle of his stomach, knocking the air out of him. 

“And I’m going to like it.” 

***

The clinic had been fairly quiet that day, quiet enough that your mind wandered to places you didn’t want it to. 

Andrew was no help. He was oddly withdrawn, only really responding when prompted, not initiating much conversation himself. But he didn’t fight you when you put on Joni Mitchell, so you were taking what you could get. You were dreading going home but didn’t have a reason to tell Andrew you wanted to sleep over, either. You were debating about how up front you wanted to be when there was yelling outside the clinic. 

“Help!” Someone screamed. You looked to Andrew for just half a second before running for the doors. 

Two FEDRA soldiers were hauling in a third man, holding him by his underarms and knees, the man’s body totally limp. He was so covered in blood you were almost certain he couldn’t still be breathing. 

“Jesus Christ,” you said before yelling over your shoulder. “Kristen! Trauma!” You turned your attention back to the men. “What happened?” 

“Don’t know,” one said. “Just found him like this, he transferred in with us there’s no way someone here hates him enough to do this yet…” 

“Let’s get him back,” you said, Kristen running up to you as you headed back toward the exam rooms and the surgical suite. “We need O-, a lot of it…” She glanced around you to the injured man.

“Not sure that’ll make a damn difference,” she said but she ran to obey. 

“We’ll start him in an exam room,” you said quickly. “Want to try to maintain a sterile area in the OR but I’m sure we’ll need it…” 

They carried him into the exam room and lifted him onto the table. You quickly washed your hands and gloved up before diving in, looking the man over. Kristen ran in with the O- and quickly hung it as you cleaned up a place on his arm to start a transfusion. 

“Do you even know who this is?” You asked the men who carried him in. The man’s face was beaten beyond any kind of recognition. His lower lip was barely hanging on, eyes swollen shut, nose crushed. 

“He had his dog tags,” one man said. “It’s Lewis McCarthy…” 

You froze, your stomach twisting. Your head spun. 

“Doc, I don’t think we can do much here,” Kristen said from McCarthy’s side. “He’s lost so much blood…” 

“We should try,” you said, on autopilot. You tried to find the worst injuries on the man. He was missing teeth. He’d been stabbed numerous times. His whole body was covered in blood and bruises, not a single inch of him left unscathed. You swallowed before pulling down his pants to see what might be on his legs when you saw it. 

“Oh my God,” you jumped back from the table and into Andrew, who’d come into the exam room at some point and you hadn’t noticed. He caught you. 

“What?” Kristen asked before looking herself. “Oh!”

She jumped back, too. 

Where McCarthy’s penis had been, there was nothing. Just an open wound. One of the men who brought him in gagged and ran for the trash can, throwing up. You stared at it, the place where the part of him he’d weaponized against you had been torn away. Andrew held onto you. 

“We’re losing him,” Kristen said, her hand on his neck. “Doc, I don’t think… there’s nothing we can do here, there’s nothing we can do with this.” 

You nodded, shaking as Andrew kept you upright. He looked to the men. 

“You should go,” he said. “Don’t need to see this.” 

They nodded, trembling as they left. 

“I’ll go get a bag,” Kristen said, staring wide eyed at him. “Stuff to start clean up…” 

She left you and Andrew alone with the body. 

“Andrew,” you whispered. “Did you talk to Joel?” 

“He had questions,” he said, voice flat. 

“Oh my God,” you stared at the body. “What did he do?” 

“The right thing,” he said, squeezing your shoulder. “The right fucking thing.” 

A/N: AHHHHHHH THE McCARTHY CHAPTER. I've been waiting for Joel to go off on him since chapter 8 and we finally got here. So satisfying to write, hopefully satisfying to read!

There is a taglist for this story! If you're interested in being added, comment below. If I've missed you in the past, please comment and let me know!

Thank you, everyone, for reading and commenting! It's been a dream to see how people feel about this piece while I'm writing it. Love you all, thank you for taking the time to read my work <3

Taglist: @paleidiot@ayamenimthiriel@ginger-swag-rapunzel@drewharrisonwriter@flugazi @pedropascalsbbg@taoyuji@starstruckmusiciansartghost@splendsay@bigboiseason123@jpbplvr @ashleyandring @mrsyixingunicorn10@sloanexx@ninaminaromina @lady-bellyn

[stars-and-inkpots]

Ok- sorry I’ve never done this before. But I was wondering if you could do a Gale fic/ oneshot where tav/reader somehow finds a way to like remove his orb but instead of getting rid of it all together it goes to them? Like now they have the orb in their chest and they have like all the pain and the possibility of going boom? If not that’s completely fine- I just had that idea and I felt you’d be amazing for it! I hope you have an amazing day!<3

OKAY! I know I've been gone for like five months, but I finally got motivated again! (Those new patches have thrown me right back into my hyperfixation) I know this is so very very late, but I hope you enjoy! I really liked this idea, and it honestly might end of a part of a multi-chapter thing if I get around to it. This is set before the events of the game.

(p.s. it's 3 am and I haven't really read through this, so I'm sorry if there are some mistakes that I won't catch till I've slept)

What's Yours is Mine | Gale x Reader

After months of research, you finally find a way to get rid of the volatile orb in Gale's chest. Of course, things don't work out exactly the way you intend them to.

Pairing: Gale/Reader

Tags: hurt/comfort, angst, brief allusion to suicide(kinda?)

Ao3 Link: Baldur's Gate 3 Requests

Word Count: 1249

You know it isn’t going to be easy. It’s taken months of research, and even now as you look through the large practically ancient book, you aren’t entirely sure that this is going to work. Gale is sceptical too, he doesn’t want to get his hopes up. He also knows that when it comes to old magic like this, there is always the chance of something going wrong. It wasn’t like this was simple magic either. The nature of his condition is complicated and volatile, and this could easily cause problems.  

Gale sits in the centre of the chalk circle while you finish drawing the runes around it. 

“Are you sure about this, my love?” 

You’ve been talking in circles like this for the past twenty minutes while you’ve been preparing for the actual ritual. 

“Yes, Gale. We’re so close to a solution now.” You draw the final line of a rune and walk over to kneel in front of him. “I’m sure. If there’s a chance to help you, I want to take it.” You kiss his forehead and he gives you a small smile. “Are you sure you’re okay with this?” 

“I’m sure,” he answers, and kisses you quickly before you stand again. 

With the circle of runes finished, you move to grab the book. The page you need is bookmarked, and you flip to it to study the words on the page once more. Between the lines are notes and annotations in both Gale’s and your own writing. You added reminders on how to pronounce some of the words, and Gale had marked the translation. You look at Gale once more, and he gives you a reassuring nod. 

You start reciting the lines from the book. Immediately, you can feel the air begin to buzz with magic. Three lines in, and you can taste copper, which is a common side-effect when it comes to older magic like this so it’s not too concerning yet. What is a little worrying, is the sheer amount of power you can feel moving through your body while you speak, and the slight purple glow that is spreading across your arms and steadily growing brighter. You chance a glance at Gale and notice that he too seems to be feeling the same effects. There’s a growing apprehension in both of you as you continue to speak the words on the page. By the time you reach the final line, the feeling is almost unbearable. It’s like the pressure in the room has increased tenfold, like a weight has been dropped on your shoulders and bears down on your lungs.

Once you utter the final word, everything seems to slow for a moment. 

Then you feel it. 

A horrible pain wracks through your body. You let out a scream. It feels like something is tearing open your chest- or is it clawing its way in? You can’t tell; you can’t think. Your vision is dark, and you aren’t sure if it’s because you’ve blacked out or because pain has forced your eyes shut. Everything feels cold, far, far too cold, but also so terribly hot. 

Finally, the pain lessens enough that you can take a full breath, though it is interrupted by a sputtering cough. When you eventually open your eyes again, you realise that at some point you must have fallen to the floor. You can feel Gale’s arms around you, he is shaking. 

“Did it work?” You ask, despite how much it hurts to speak. The burning feeling in your chest hasn’t entirely left yet. 

“That doesn’t matter. Are you okay?” 

You try to sit up and wince with the effort. Gods, your chest hurts. 

“I’ll be alright. Gale, did it work?” You ask again, looking for the tell-tale mark on his chest and neck. You find the scar still, skin sunken in some parts and raised in others, but it is no longer the usual, shimmering purple. Now, it just looks like a normal (save for the shape) scar. You smile, because at least the spell did its job. Then you see a look of horror cross Gale’s face. 

“No, gods no,” he whispers, tentatively brushing his fingers along your collarbone. You hiss in pain. It feels like he’s brushed his hands across a fresh burn. 

You bring your own hand up to feel the centre of your chest, and your stomach drops. You know the shape, having memorised it from the number of times you ran your hands across Gale’s scar. This spell worked, but not in the way it should have. 

“We have to do it again,” Gale stands, pushing a still shaky hand through his messy hair. He stares at the special candles that have already burnt far too low to make it through the ritual a second time, and lets himself believe that they will be enough. “I am not going to let you carry my burden like this. Get in the circle and I can start the ritual again.”

“You know that won’t work. The candles are out, and all the herbs and incense are burnt, not to mention the crystals. It will take ages to find those again.” You don’t blame him for this, no matter how much he might blame himself and how much he might want you to blame him. “I’ll be fine, Gale. You managed it for so long, and now it’s my turn. We’ll figure it out.” A part of you remembers what Gale said of his power and how the orb drained it, but you quickly silence those thoughts before you can worry too much about your own magic. 

“No. This wretched thing is the consequence of my mistake. I will not let you suffer through it. I can’t.” He’s kneeling in front of you again, cradling your face in his hands. “What if it becomes unstable? I can’t-” Gale tries and fails to keep his voice steady. “That cannot happen to you.” 

“And it would be better if it were to happen to you? It is fine for you to die with it?” You return, perhaps too harshly, but surely now he might understand how it felt to hear him say such things when it was him with the magic bomb in his chest. 

“I’m sorry,” is all he answers after a few moments of silence. You aren’t sure what exactly he’s apologising for, but you wrap your arms around him and rest your head on his shoulder. 

“We’ll figure this out. We always do. I promise.” The pain still hasn’t subsided completely. You can’t imagine how Gale has managed to grit his teeth and bear it on his worst days if this is how the orb feels when it is, more or less, stable. You feel him press a kiss to the crown of your head. “It’s like we always say, remember? What’s yours is mine.” The phrase was common between you two. It was one of the first things Gale had said when you moved into the tower with him. ‘What’s mine is yours,’ he had said with a grand sweeping gesture. Since then it has been used whenever either of you had to borrow something from the other, anything from books to warm wool sweaters you had no intention of returning anytime soon. It seems strange to say it now, but you hope it gets your point across regardless; by the slight shake of Gale’s chest as he laughs softly, you figure it has. 

[dragonrider9905]

Celebrating You!

Hi guys! I’ve been on here for a bit now and while I never had a follower goal, I do appreciate you guys who have decided to follow me! So now I’d like to celebrate you!

In light of TBB ending, and how much we'll be missing the boys, I thought this was as good as a time as ever!

Here’s the idea! I’m opening a prompt request for the dates of April 5th through May 5th, 2024 (you may start submitting now though!) and choose from the prompts below! You can choose one from each category, or just one category. It’s ok if it is just the prompt or the prompt and a brief idea. If you have a fun idea or prompt not listed, please share!

Rules: I only write SFW. I typically write for clones; I reserve the right to refuse requests which make me uncomfortable for whatever reason. I have had a few requests in the past that really unsettled me for various reasons. Or if I don't know the character. I'd hate to try to write something then upset the person because it is so ooc that it's cringy. (But if I said I would write your request and haven't yet, I just honestly haven't gotten to it :D I like to do well on the stories you guys entrust to me so it does take me a bit :D)

This is supposed to be fun so lets keep it fun!

You may submit as many requests as you'd like! The more the merrier!

Characters: Star Wars Clone Wars or The Bad Batch (as long as I know them. I know a lot of clones but alas, not all.)

Story genre:

Classic SW! (Pick an era if they exist in more than one if you wish)

AU of choice (modern, western, pirate, mermaid, time traveling, etc if I’m unfamiliar with the genre, I may have to change it or request more details)

Dialogue Prompts:

“Don’t go where I can’t follow.”

“If we’re going to do this we’ll need—“ “A plan?” “No! Code names! Cool ones!”

“I don’t need to be anything to you. I just want my life to mean more to you than my death.”

“You are playing a dangerous game without even a glimpse of the rule book.”

“I’ve never been terrified of death, til he set his sights on you.”

“What the hell are you doing here?” “Yeah, you’re not allowed to ask that in this situation.”

“Where’s your shoe?” “The giant mud puddle in the road demanded a sacrifice.”

“Love at first sight doesn’t exist.” “Then how else do I describe the feeling I got when I first saw you?” “You…love me?” “Apparently not, according to you.”

“A fate worse than death….” “They’re burnt cupcakes.”

“White paint has more color than your face.”

“Why is there a dragon in my fridge?” “It was hot.”

“Touch **, and you’re dead.”

“I am the law.”

“Do that again and I’ll throw you out the window. Wait, what are you doing?” “Checking how high the drop is; seeing if it’s worth it.”

“I’d rather have you hate me than loose you entirely.”

“I have a mission but don’t know what it is.” “Well that sounds incredibly counterproductive.”

“I would like to join you in acknowledging the difficulties in your life.” “You are the worst at this comforting thing.”

“I don’t know if you’re aware of this but I’m quite petite.” “Really? I had no idea in our twelve years of friendship that you’re shorter than I am.”

“But what is power?” “Loyalty.”

“Don’t you sign to me in that tone.”

“I’m with him/her for better or worse.” “It’ll probably be worse.” “I knew that the day I met him/her.”

"I'm sorry I tried to kill you." "It's fine, but next time you should try harder."

"C'mon, like I need an excuse to spend time with you."

"You're not as bad as everyone says you are."

"The only one who gets to kill you is me."

“blood loss”? well it’s not lost. I know exactly where it went. right over there.”

“How the mighty have fallen!” “It’s a dropped chocolate bar, stop being dramatic.”

“Shit, we’re gonna die” “Now I don’t want to hear that negative attitude, look on the bright side!” “Yay! We’re gonna die! Woo!”

“How do you do it?” “How do I do what?” “Pretend you are ok.” “I’m not pretending.” “Yes, you are. Every single day and it breaks my heart.”

“Hey, so I know things are pretty f**** shitty right now but I need you to breathe for me.” “Wha-wh-wh-” “You’re having a panic attack. It’s gonna be ok. Just breathe with me.”

“Please, my arms—I can’t wipe my tears, don’t let them see!”

"Smiles are contagious!" "Don't worry, I'm vaccinated."

"I don't want to get involved, it's too risky." "Please do it for me, you're the only one I can turn to." "It's not worth it. You really want to lose everything? 'cause I don't."

"Do you ever think of anyone other than yourself?" "No"---a long pause---"actually yes, at Christmas time"

"There is a reason I go through that door first, It's to make sure everyone else walks back out"

“I can’t leave you here!” “You can and you will.”

"OH! Are you alright? Are you alright?" "Apart from being trapped under here, and maybe suffering from broken bones and embarrassment beyond what I am capable of handling. . . I'm dandy, why do you ask?"

Oh no, are you alright? You're covered in blood!" "Yes, it's yours, Now will you please let me take you to the hospital?"

"What did love ever do anything for anyone anyway?"

"What the hell were you even thinking?!" "You told me not to think!"

"With love comes loss, that's part of the deal. Sometimes it hurts, but in the end, it was all worth it. There's no greater gift than love."

“'Temporary stitches' all stitches are temporary if you have a pair of scissors and aren’t a coward" "What do you....that better not mean what I think you mean......" "Am I just talking about sewing stitches or sutures too? Maaayyybe?" "NO! Absolutely not!"

"I made the calculations, and boy am I bad at math."

"It'll be over soon, I promise."

"Working together again, just like old times." "Well, not just like old times."

"I am many things but not your enemy."

Action Prompts:

Forehead kisses

Palm/hand kisses

Dramatic rain scene

Touching foreheads

Jealousy

Dancing

Last stand

Christmas/Life Day celebration

mistletoe

Accidental hand touch

First date

First kiss

Spending time with the family

Bad day cheering up scheme

Pranks

Going to a pet shop

Going to the movies

Always go after the girl

soft spoken person has loud, unnerving scream.

Lullabies

Nightmares

injury

amnesia

pretend/mistaken to be married/in a relationship

cooking

[dreamwritersworld]

Outgrown. Final part. (Miles morales x reader)

“Hey-“

Y/n attempted on closing the door but Miles stopped it so all she did was walk away letting him in.

“Please just let me say what I have to-“

“Say? You already did enough Miles. I don’t need anymore apologies or excuses. I’m busy.”

Miles took a moment to look at the textbooks spread out on the small coffee table and uncleaned dishes on the dinner table.

“I know that! Y/n please I’m sorry-“

“Y/n! We’re done!”

Miles was once again interrupted by the children letting Y/n know to help them.

“Ok miles. Just- stay here.”

His apology seemed genuine but…Y/n was so closed off to it, she wouldn’t allow him in so easily. Miles stayed in the living room for 15 minutes picking up the mess that was previously there while Y/n helped her siblings get ready for bed. He immediately froze hearing her footsteps..

“Look miles, I know what you’re gonna say. We’ve been through this before-“

“Please Y/n just let me finish what I had to say. I like-“

“Y/n!!!!! Lita hit me on purpose!”

Yet another interruption came across the pair, Y/n rushed into the bedroom of her two siblings as a calm Lita walked out nonchalantly sitting down of the counter opening a coloring book.

“I didn’t hit him! The book just fell on his head by accident!…so miles...”

Miles head turned towards a stern Lita with the most annoyed face. Lita was never one to beat around the bush.

“you messed up..terribly. But Don’t worry she likes your smile and fancy hair..I know, I read her diary.”

“She thinks it’s fancy?..”

“yup.”

Right then and there Lita gave his confidence right back to him and the little girl walked back out the kitchen knowing Y/n was coming back…she always did.

“Go to sleep-“

“I know! Don’t forget to tuck me in!”

Lita walked away and Y/n walked towards Miles bracing herself for the conversation.

When Y/n opened that door and saw miles her heart started to roll back to him and wanted more than just words. He was her heaven and hell. She wanted to ignore everything telling her to not come back.

“I love you Y/n and I know that doesn’t mean too much to you anymore. This last month has been terrible without you and I’m so sorry for saying things that aren’t true. You leaving was my reality check that not everyone was going to sit around and watch me cry and whine over someone who wasn’t there for me anymore….but you were. I love you for that, I love you for your family, for all that you do.”

Tears built up as both teens look at each other but Y/n tried so hard to just push him away…he was easy to love…but he was closed off and not easy to get love back from.

For miles he was willing to travel across the whole world for you, he just couldn’t see it and now he wants nothing more then you coming back to him.

“W-we can’t. We won’t, miles. I’m too busy, I have so much things going on. Our schedules and worlds aren’t the same right now. We’ve outgrown each other and that’s ok…you just realized it far too late.”

The last line burned into Miles heart and he was ready to accept his defeat…Y/n leaving and saying these words were enough punishment for all the things he’s done…but if he left now, he’d be giving her up on her too easily.

“We’ll make it work Y/n! I accept all of you. I’ve been watching you everyday for the past month, I know the new route you take home after hours of work. I see you taking care of Juan and Lita constantly. I know the reason why there was so many books on the table was because you’re tryin to pass all your exams. I know you’re feeling stressed and overworked…I know you’re trying to do better for everyone but Y/n your already perfect. You’re it for me.”

“Miles I can’t quit you…”

More tears and sobs fell from Y/n as miles stated all the actions and feelings Y/n had.

You see?…even with all the disagreements the pair had miles always gave Y/n a secure comfort spot. Much how Y/n was his way back to reality…he was her way to get away from it. They fit perfectly but too much built emotion pushed them away.

Miles rushed in hugging Y/n, suffocating her in his love and comfort in which Y/n couldn’t deny anymore.

“I’m sorry.”

That’s all he kept repeating to her as Y/n sulked into his arms. Within that moment Y/n went back to him. Once the tears went away the two looked at each other and shared a kiss, melting into each other.

Miles walked them back to the sofa and had them both fall onto it, sharing a laugh and now tears of happiness fell from Y/n.

“why are you crying..?”

“because I love you too..”

“I want my goodnight kiss too Y/n!!”

Their laughs soon became annoyed groans as they both get up and turn to Lita as she looks at them with a uninterested face.

“What? You promised me.”

Lita walked away with a stomp in her feet and crossed arms while Y/n got up from miles, walking away back to her duties.

She was walking mindlessly but turned to the sound of his footsteps.

“You can wait there Miles it’s fine I just gotta tuck them in.”

“I know I can but..I said I’d be here to love all of you didn’t i? I’ll help you.”

Y/n turned around quickly giving him one more hug and held his hand gently guiding him inside the room.

Both younger siblings were tucked in and as they walked out Juan and lita spoke again.

“Goodnight lovebirds!”

The door was shut quickly by Y/n in embarrassment as her cheeks heat up, turning red.

“Lovebirds huh? I like that name.”

Miles couldn’t get enough of the laugh and smiles Y/n let out, he embraced her one more time before saying goodnight and go.

They had outgrown each other…but they made another garden full of love.

!💜!

so sorry it took awhile to post I been studying for exams and this is my first week of summer 🫶 for some reason it’s not letting me tag some of you and I’m so sorry 🥲

Tag list: @justleila @tati-the-fangirl @kxllanxtdoor @abbersreads @abislays123 @not-aya @usernamepasswordsstuff @moralesluvrr @inluvwithneteyam @twinkletwinklenotastar @ilystarz @vodoo-heart @papichulo120627 @mashiromochi @sukisprettyface @sonaya101 @dorck26 @seokjinspinkslipper @planetliaa

[butdaddyilovehim-hs]

The Wedding

Y/N is stressed planning for their wedding and Harry can’t seem to do anything right.

Warnings: angst, sad ending, explicit language

Word Count: 1.2k

Y/N gazed at the bling on her finger, the stone catching in the sunlight. It had been 6 months since she had said yes and wedding planning was in full swing. Of course with Harry being CEO of one of the largest Fortune 500 companies in the world, their wedding was all any of the tabloids were talking about.

Harry and Y/N. London’s power couple. There were now less than 2 months before the big day and Y/N had everything under control. Well… she thought she did. Y/N sighed and rubbed her temples as she stared at the seating chart, a massive binder beside her. A steaming cup of coffee was placed in front of her as Harry kissed the top of her head before sitting down next to her.

“Y/N. You’ve been staring at those charts for the last two hours. Why don’t you take a break?” She raised an eyebrow before taking a deep breath.

“Take a break? Are you kidding me? Our wedding is in 2 months Harry. And the seating plan still isn’t finished. I still haven’t bought my dress, you haven’t been to get a tux and we haven’t booked the flowers. We haven’t booked the flowers Harry!” He chuckled before tucking a stray piece of hair behind her ear.

“It’s going to be fine Y/N. Ok let me help. We can have our parents seated together on table 2… wait. Your mom isn’t on this list?” Y/N sighed as Harry looked up at her quizzically.

“I don’t know if I want to invite her. We still haven’t worked out all of our issues and I don’t need her coming in and running the whole show.”

“Why don’t you invite her for a visit? You need to work things out and I’m sure she would love nothing more than to be there for you on our day.” Y/N took a large sip of her coffee, shaking her head violently.

“Nope. No way Harry. I can’t deal with her right now. I’m stressed enough as it is.”

“But maybe if you tried you could-”

“I said NO Harry. Stop pushing it.” She turned her attention back to the seating chart, shutting him out completely. Harry watched her for a few moments before shaking his head and walking to the study. She’s just overwhelmed, he told himself. We’re going to be fine.

~

3 weeks later Y/N felt like she was drowning. She had found her dress but it was the wrong size since she had lost so much weight for the wedding. Everyone was getting on her nerves. Even Harry. Well… especially Harry. She heard the front door open then close and tore her gaze away from her planner to see Harry come in through the front door. Noticeably, without a tux. He leant down to kiss her hello, before noticing her annoyed glare.

“Everything ok hun?”

“Harry… where’s your tux?” Y/N asked coolly. His expression turned to confusion.“Y/N, what are you talking about? You told me last week to pick it up on Wednesday. It’s- he checked the date on his phone- shit. I thought it was Tuesday. Doesn’t matter, I'll just go tomorrow.” Y/N slammed her book shut before glaring at him once more.

“You can’t just “go tomorrow.” They’re closed for the next 3 weeks Harry. You won’t have time to make any adjustments if it’s wrong. God why can’t you just listen for once?!” She bit out frustrated.

Harry laughed dryly.

“Why can’t I just listen for once? Jesus Y/N, I have been listening to you for the past 6 months complain about each tiny thing that has gone wrong. Big deal. I forgot to collect it. I’ll go and get it when I can. Calm down.” Y/N stood up from the couch seething.

“Calm down? Are you fucking serious? I am so busy Harry. I have a company to run and the wedding of the year to plan. Have you seen these tabloids? I am so sick of all of them asking whether or not I’m having a baby because I seem to have ‘gained a little weight’ lately. I’m asking you to do one thing and you can’t even do that. What have you done to help me Harry? I am so sick of you.”

“Oh my god Y/N what the hell is wrong with you? It’s our wedding, it’s not the hunger games. No one is dying if it isn’t perfect. I don’t understand why you-” The doorbell rang, silencing the both of them.

Y/N stalked over to the door and wrenched it open.

“My baby!” Y/N spat out a mouthful of blonde hair as she was brought into a bone-crushing hug.

“I’ve missed you so much! And a wedding? When Harry called me last week to invite me, I just couldn’t believe it!” Y/N tugged out of the hug shooting a death glare at her fiance.

“Harry did what?” Lauren Williams beamed at her daughter, oblivious to the tension in the room.

“He invited me to the wedding honey.” She repeated patiently. Lauren moved around to give Harry a hug.

“I can’t wait to help you with everything sweetie. Have you chosen a dress? Can I see? What about flowers? Because they can be hard to-”

“Mom,” Y/N said through gritted teeth. “I just need to have a quick chat with Harry ok?”

Y/N dragged Harry to the spare bedroom down the hall to make sure Lauren couldn’t hear them.

“Ok what the fuck Harry? I specifically told you I didn’t want her here!” Harry sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

“I thought it would be better for you guys to sort out your issues before the wedding but it seems like we have some stuff to work out ourselves.” Y/N huffed before crossing her arms over her chest.

“Yeah? No kidding. This is another example of you not listening. You don’t make an effort Harry and it drives me insane since I’m here fighting for this wedding. For us.” Harry snapped.

“Well if it’s so difficult for you then maybe we should call off the wedding! This clearly isn't working for us anymore! He yelled.

Y/N’s mouth snapped shut, her anger replaced with sadness. Her eyes glistened with tears and her bottom lip trembled.

“Are you… serious?” She asked quietly. “You just want to give up on us?” Because of an argument?” Harry pinched the bridge of his nose, his frustration evident.

“One argument? All we do is argue! I haven’t had a single conversation with you that hasn’t ended with one of us screaming in the last 2 weeks. I don’t know what you want from me Y/N! I’m trying. I swear to god I’m fucking trying.”

“So is that what we’re doing then? Calling it off?”

“No Y/N I didn’t mean that. I just-”

“No, you made it pretty clear what you meant.” She let the tears fall freely now, dodging around him to get through the door, grabbing her purse off the table ignoring the confused look from her mother.

“Y/N, come back! We can work this out.”

“I have to get out of here Harry.” She rushes out onto the street, tears clouding her vision, her one goal being to get to her car. She doesn’t hear Harry screaming her name until it’s too late. The car hits her just as she looks up, but she’s unconscious before she can even feel the pain.

A/N: 🫠

Taglist:

@lukesaprince @intimacywithceline @styleslover-1994