#but this is probably going to be a bad series that we know is bad but watch because fun

[lamentationsofalonelypotato]

@waynes-multiverse

Hi Wayne!! I was so excited to see your wonderful feedback 💚 I'm also very sorry this took me so long because April was long and May is already starting to spiral 😅

Aww, he’s already saving her. Why do I think that means something? 😂

Maybe.... 😉

Of course he did. Ben really always knows how to talk to the ladies 🙈

I know. He's soooooo charming isn't he? Doesn't he know just what to say to make a woman swoooonnn? 😒

Ooooh I’m sensing he doesn’t want her to walk home alone either. Someone already seems to have caught a little bit of feelings 😏

Pssshhhh... Girl, What? That's crazzzyyyy? Why would SB ever have feelings?

And I love that we have the same HC, Lee! I totally believe too that SB would just obnoxiously stare at a girl he likes – to the point it gets a little weird – and then cover it up with whatever stupid line comes to his mind lmao

Aww yay! I love that too! I honestly believe that the staring would be so uncomfortable- but he's just a baby (not for realsies but a baby when it comes to feelings LOL 🤣) and he doesn't know how to say what he's feeling! Well, doesn't know how to say what he's feeling in a healthy way 😭

Yep 💯 I’m already scared what Kripke will do to him in S5. At one point, is fanfic writers will have a hard time to redeem him 😅

Oh my word- ME TOO! I'm so scared that he's really gonna take him to the unredeemable place... I also feel like SB is gonna do something really bad in Vought Rising too and I'm frightened 😅 BUT that is what's fanfiction is for LOL

Ooooh? 👀 I’m guessing this is the finale at Vought Tower. I’m curious to see how you changed that ending. I always found that super hard due to Ryan (unless we pretend that kid was never there, which I’m fine with lol)

You're right! It is the finale at Vought Tower! 🤗 I don't go into too too much detail on that, but pieces of it are sprinkled through the fic 🥰 AND yes! For me it's kinda hard to write around the finale, because it's pretty set in stone. And I always give Ben the same job after in all my fics 😅 But it's funny because I just realized that I never mention Ryan in this fic at all 🤣 Whoops? Guess I forgot the brat LOL! But yes, let's just pretend he wasn't there 🤣

Oh, burn 😂

I was so proud of that zinger let me tell you 🤣

And I absolutely love her powers btw!!! 😍🌿🪴 Can I tell you a secret? My favorite superhero powers have always been either time or plant powers 😂💚

YES! Plant powers and earthbending powers are my favorite (time travel is super cool too)! I thought it was such a travesty that we haven't seen a plant supe in the Boys yet. I've got my fingers crossed for S5- if they do it justice 🤞🏻

Awwww, I hope she gets it 🥹 I honestly wanna give her a big hug. She sounds a little lonely (but maybe that won’t stay this way for long 😏)

She does deserve that though! I too wanted to give her a big hug when I was writing this. But I'm also happy you highlighted this little snippet, because that's a theme through this entire series. It comes up quite a lot 😅

And that high school boyfriend sounded like a real winner 🙄 (But good for her for locking that douche in a tree lol!!!)

Oh he was terrible 😒

Ah yes! Every woman’s worst nightmare 🙈 I’d be scared shitless for her, but knowing she has superpowers helps immensely with the anxiety. And I have a weird feeling SB will pop up, too, because he still didn’t want her walking home alone because he *cares* 😏💚 (That’s probably a curse word for him lol) And seriously, her powers are so freaking cool!!! 😍💚🪴🌿

Yep. The dreaded walk home 🫣 Oh yeah, definitely, the powers make it a little bit better, but still writing it I was anxiety city. I'm dead at "*cares* 😏💚 (That’s probably a curse word for him lol)" 🤣🤣 It's SO true- the one curse word he won't say.

Knew it!!!! Oh, Ben aren’t you just a fucking softie inside… Why you gotta be like this? 😂🙈💚

He's a big ol' softie- with a black heart of gold LOL. And I just had to drop in the touch her and die trope... because I can't be stopped. It's compulsion at this time point.

Also I love modern family, so watching Gloria beat up Jay like that on the gif was wonderful 💗

Oh, of course! Why am I not surprised, huh, Ben? 😏

He might have been taking a bigger interest in her well-being than he wanted to admit lol.

I’m sorry – you were gonna say? Before what, hmm? Oh, he’s already a complete goner, isn’t he? 😅💕 And of course he gave her an excuse and won’t admit to shit. A stroll? That’s what he’s going with. Who will buy that, Ben? You don’t look like the typical 2am stroller in the rain 😝 And it’s obvious he likes and that she’s at least attracted to his face when his mouth stays closed, but I’m honestly so fucking excited and curious to see how he will pull this off and win her over 👀 And I love his fucking argument of his attempt on her life being already a month ago 🤣🤣 Like bro, it ain’t the magic sentence you think it is lmao

Mhmm, man is already smitten.

Oh definitely... Ben always strolls in the middle of the night in the pouring rain. Doesn't everybody? No? LOL.

She is "attracted to his face when his mouth stays closed" 🤣☠️! I'm excited that you're excited to see how he wins her over! It is a wild ride, I'll say that much without saying too many spoilers lol.

And you're right, Ben is really out here like- it was a month ago, get over it! HE TRIED TO KILL HER! 🤣

Ugh, I hate when he’s a little right 🙄

He is. The one thing about the current century he understands 🤣

Whyyyyy, Benjamin?? Why are you like this? 😩

The toxic masculinity really coming in clutch at this point lol

Because dicks are hard 😏 I see myself out…

Actual footage of when I read this 👆🏻 GIRL STAWPPP, I'M DEAD 🤣🤣

Pffff, this is honestly so cute 😆💕 Yes, you use that excuse, gramps lol

I mean... imagine how awkward that is. THE POWER flickers! And Ben has supe hearing! I mean he's a little bit of a pervert, but I don't think he enjoys hearing that LOL.

Oh, Mike, you poor soul… 😂 And the fact that Butcher mocks him and he’s just oblivious to it all. Seriously poor guy lmao And of course, he was immediate cannon fodder for SB 🙈😆 But it says a lot when even Hughie had a hard time being nice to him lol But honestly, as much as she hated it, SB peacocking as her boyfriend probably gave Mike the rest. I was laughing so hard during that entire exchange 😂

The poor Mike trope is gonna trend this whole fic. Just wait til you meet Jake 🤣 And I know! Mike is one of those people who is just too precious for this world and he doesn't understand social cues like that 😭

Yep. The IMMEDIATE targeting system Ben has when he sees men who might be a little awkward and not so good around the ladies 🤣 I'm still cackling at "cannon fodder"- I love that usage here. BUT yeah, if Hughie is having a hard time then it must be almost impossible.

And yay! I'm glad you liked the exchange (peacocking LOL). It was my favorite part of this chapter- just the awkwardness and Ben being teasing and just (sexy) annoying.

Oh God 🫠🫠🫠 What I’d give to make out with this asshole 😩 (Probably had to give up feminism lol)

Ah yes, the day feminism took a vacation. I think I've seen that special, just like the "The Year Without A Santa Claus." 🤣 But oh yeah, my feminism would have to just shut it's eyes and put noise canceling headphones on.

Dead. I’m wheezing over here, Lee!!! 🤣🤣

Okay, hear me out. I love Mike's mother. She is literally my favorite side character in this entire fic. And she's just so wild, so unhinged (she's all of us). The more you see her in this fic, the funnier it is.

I’m sorry, my boy… but when exactly did we let you move in? God, he’s so fucking obnoxious sometimes 😂 So that’s his plan winning her over? Forced proximity? Why am I not surprised this is the best he could come up with. He probably thinks the Stockholm syndrome will help with his flirting lmao

Not the Stockholm syndrome 🤣🤣🤣 He really is obnoxious and the reader is just an inch away from throwing him off the roof!

I absolutely love that her apartment is full of plants!!! Total boho vibes 😍🌿 But hey, how neat! If they ever get together, she can grow weed for him 😆

Yes! Her apartment is the dream. I love plants so much- I have them all over my house so it was just so wonderful to write a reader like that 💚 And it's funny that you mention weed...

Gaaaah, I’m so hooked! I love their dynamic and can’t wait to see if she gives him a chance, and what he’ll do or how he’ll change to deserve it!!! Such a fantastic start to this series! 💚💚💚 And sorry for not getting here sooner or checking in with you more this month, friend! April was a little rough and I’m still majorly catching up with everything, but I’m so glad I finally get to read this wonderful series 🥰

Yay!! I'm so happy you like this one! It is again, another fic that was supposed to just be one chapter, but I fell in love with the reader and Ben and got turned into a series 😅

And oh no! Please don't apologize! I'm so sorry that I've been awol and haven't been able to read Time After Time! I loved the first chapter so much and I've just been running around like a chicken with it's head cut off for April and it's starting up again for May 😭 But it was so wonderful to read you comments friend! I hope that May is better for you than April 💗

Chapter 1: Are You Always Like This?

Pairing: Soldier Boy x f!reader, Reader POV

Summary:  When you decided to work with Butcher and his merry band of supe hunters to take down Homelander, you never expected to be saddled with a sullen, grumpy, jerk like Soldier Boy when the job was done. The more you’re around him the more you hate him, but you can’t help but wonder, is he really as big a jerk as you think? Reader is a supe with plant powers. This takes place in an AU about a month after the end of The Boys Season 3, in which Butcher has let Soldier Boy continue to work with him on his team. (I'm real bad at summaries, please forgive me!)

Tropes: Enemies to Lovers (Implied/Eventual), Age Difference (Reader is in her 20s), Protective Ben/ Soldier Boy, Fake Dating

Word Count: 7.4 K (OOPS)

Warnings: I'm going to label this 18+/Mature because Soldier Boy (he's a warning and everyone knows it), swearing, mentions of sex, sexual innuendo, sexual tension, violence. Ben/Soldier Boy might be a little bit OOC.

Note: This is told from Reader's perspective. Any references to the reader is made using you or your. There is minimal use of y/n. I tried my best to proofread, but nobody's perfect. If you don’t like, don’t read, but if you do like, you’re my favorite!

Internal monologue is in italics and is in first person.

A/N: I know I know, I should be working on "You Call It Madness But I Call It Love," but this idea was swirling around in my head and I had to write it.

Spotify Playlist 🪴

Masterlist

Take A Chance On Me Masterlist

You Call It Madness But I Call It Love

"Alright Butcher, I'm done." You sigh closing the file in front of you and standing from the worn wooden table covered in empty Chinese food containers and stacks of papers almost as tall as you. "If I read another word about trying to stop an electrical current, I'm going to commit toaster bath and I'm taking you with me."

It was late, past two in the morning, but Butcher had a lead on a B-list supe that had been using his electrical powers to steal cars and run a chop shop business downtown. You had been close to catching him yesterday, so close in fact that your eyebrows were still a little crispy from when he shot a bolt of lightning at your face that you only dodged in the nick of time when Soldier Boy grabbed the back of your shirt and yanked you out of the way. Unfortunately, your shirt hadn't survived, it had ripped and you spent the rest of the day wearing one of Butcher's oversize Hawaiian shirts all the while Soldier Boy told you that it was a waste to keep a pretty little figure like yours covered up.

I hate him so much.

When Butcher had initially asked you to join his team a month ago you were excited, but then you found out that you were going to be stuck with Soldier Boy. The supe, that despite Annie's arguments should be given back to the government and put on ice, was allowed to join Butcher's team after he took down Homelander. Who was currently frozen on ice, somewhere. As long as Homelander was far from you, you didn't care. The guy gave you the creeps.

But the team still couldn't figure out where the electricity manipulating supe was hiding or where he was dropping the cars, which meant you had spent the past twelve hours staring at files and a computer screen so hard that you felt like your brain going to melt out of your ears.

"Do whatever ya want kid. I'm not ya damn babysitter." Butcher grunts, his face hidden behind his own file. His boots were on the table and he was leaning back in his chair so far that you were tempted to tip him over, all it would take was a good solid kick.

You smile at him. Butcher was adept at pretending that he didn't want you around, of course you knew how antsy he got when you weren't there to offer your opinion. You figured that he just liked pushing people away and given his history you understood that.

Annie sits up from where she and Hughie are cuddling on the couch. "Why don't you stay?" Her brow furrows with worry. Annie was big on the whole, "women not walking at home alone at night thing," which normally you didn't, but you figured that whatever was waiting outside the apartment was probably less intimidating than Homelander. And you could handle it.

"Because I'd like to sleep in my own bed tonight and not that godforsaken rickety cot in the corner that Frenchie got. Can't stand that one spring that always seems so happy to see me." You pull your leather jacket off of the back of the chair and whirl it around your shoulders, before bringing your hair out from under the collar.

Hughie snorts.

"Hey, that cot is an antique!" Frenchie crows from his highbacked chair spewing a mouthful of smoke into the air. Kimiko was sitting at the coffee table in front of him working on her writing, a thick black marker clutched in her hand. MM was taking the night off, but you thought he was probably trying to avoid Soldier Boy.

"Yeah well, that cot is about as old as grandpa over there." You gesture to where Soldier Boy is sitting in another one of the armchairs in the corner watching you while puffing on a joint.

He was always watching you and due to your inability to read his mind it made it difficult for you to gauge what he was thinking, but you assumed that it was the usual macho crap he spouted 100% of the time. But he wasn't checking you out, well this time he wasn't. You had caught him staring at your butt more than once, and he'd made several comments about exactly what he'd like to do to you, but right now an emotion glimmered behind his eyes that you couldn't place.

Soldier Boy stands from the chair. He was wearing a dark t-shirt that stretched over his chest and a pair of blue jeans that fit him just right, well, if you were looking at that. You were, but it was easier to pretend that you weren't. It was easier to pretend that he wasn't the most attractive man you'd ever seen in your life.

Damn it, why does someone so attractive have to be such a dick?

 "A lady like you shouldn't be walking home alone this late." He frowns at you.

"Like me?" You arch an eyebrow.

"Good thing she ain't a lady." Butcher chuckles at his joke

You punch him hard on the arm, not enough to break it, but enough to make it hurt.

“Bloody hell woman.” Butcher rubs his sore bicep shooting you an angry look.

Not many people could look intimidating while wearing a Hawaiian shirt, but Butcher pulled it off. Not many people looked good in a Hawaiian shirt either, but Butcher pulled that off too.

"I'm serious." Soldier Boy's eyes narrow.

"Oh now you're so chivalrous?" You cock your hip to the side, planting your hands on your hips. "Didn't you try to kill me last month?"

"To be fair, you were trying to kill me-"

"Because you were trying to kill Annie. Where was the chivalry when you tried to tear me apart with your bare hands?"

"There are plenty of other things I'd like to do to you with my bare hands sweetheart." His grin turns wolfish. "I'd be happy to show you sometime, perhaps you'd like some company?"

"I'd rather spend an hour with that ancient spring than roll around with you." You tap your lip thoughtfully. “Then again I’m sure that cot is the same age as you and it can at least get it up.”

Annie muffles a snort behind her hand.

“Last time I checked everything was working, perhaps you’d like to see for yourself?” Soldier Boy smirks.

 "Can't you keep in your pants for once?" Butcher sighs, tilting the file downward to glare at Soldier Boy.

You can't help but smile at Butcher's response. Butcher might have tried to push you away, but even you could see his protective instincts. That became wildly apparent whenever you went out on a mission alone and although you would think that it was annoying for someone to think they needed to protect you, in Butcher's case you made an exception.

Soldier Boy rolls his eyes. "She shouldn't walk home alone."

You wave your hand over the wilting fern on the kitchen counter, eyes shifting to green for a moment as it perks up. It was the only plant in the house and although six people lived in this apartment, not one ever remembered to water it. "And you shouldn't butt into my business."

Soldier Boy opens his mouth to speak, but Annie interrupts his train of thought.

"Wait y/n. Coffee tomorrow?" Annie asks ignoring them. She's sitting up from the couch, her body turned towards you with both of her hands on the back cushions. 

She was one of your best friends, well, really one of your only friends. You'd grown up together and when Annie moved to New York you had decided to move and take some college classes in the city while you worked at a small garden shop after class part time.

The owner still couldn't figure out why nothing you cared for seemed to die.

You usually kept your status as a supe on the down low, and only used your powers when you really had to, which wasn't often before you joined Butcher's team. You'd only lasted two semesters before Annie came to ask you for help finding Soldier Boy and after that, Butcher asked you to join his team for shit pay. You accepted but you still worked at the garden shop part-time, also for terrible pay, but you loved it there.

Your powers made it easy to make sure nothing died and sometimes it felt like home being surrounded by plants. Caring for them was the one thing you seemed to be good at, and sometimes they felt like family.

You didn't have much family left, beside your grandmother and your older brother who still lived back in Des Moines, and sometimes it was lonely in the city. Annie was the only person who you'd been able to connect with since you moved, and now that you weren't going to classes the friends you made in college didn't really understand what you were doing with your life.

And telling them "oh I hunt down supes for a living and sometimes kill them" didn't really sound like something you could say in passing. It also did wonders for your dating life… NOT.

"Sorry babe, I'm at the shop tomorrow. But I'm off at 3 if you want to get coffee after?" You hold open the front door of the apartment, looking back at her expectantly.

You hated blowing Annie off, especially since the two of you hadn't been able to hang out outside of missions mostly because she was spending all her time with Hughie.

"Sounds great!" She beams.

And with that you disappear out down the hallway and into the night.

It's raining as you walk down the desolate streets. Cars splash water over the gum covered sidewalks that soaks through your tennis shoes and makes every step against the ground squish. But you ignore it.

You usually loved when it rained, loved to feel the cooling water pool against your skin, loved to hear the soft patter of it against the windows of your apartment, loved the earthy smell that came with the drops, but not tonight. You were still thinking about Soldier Boy.

You don't know why you let him get under your skin so much. You'd met men like him in the past and it was usually easy for you to brush them off, but not him.

I mean yes he is gorgeous, and maybe kind of charming when he's not trying to get into my pants, but I don't want just a one night fling. I want what Annie and Hughie have.

You think about your best friend and her loving boyfriend. You tried not to be jealous, but it was hard when the last time you had a lasting relationship was your first boyfriend back in high school who, when he found out you were a supe, was only interested if you had the power to shape shift into someone 'a little more busty.' The relationship ended with you locking him in a tree and the fire department having to come cut him out. He was fine, maybe a little more green than a normal person, but...

You'd heard that he got a job from the Green Giant Vegetable Company doing cameos as the Jolly Green Giant. So if anything, you helped him have a career?

Annie and Hughie were both head over heels in love with each other, knew everything about each other, didn't have any secrets, and it wasn't just sex, it was a close relationship with someone else who understood every part of you. You wanted that; and as much as you had avoided relationships in the past due to your supe status, you still hoped to find a supe that was kind and didn't think that they were a god for what they could do.

Why do so many have a god complex?

You think again about Soldier Boy. That wasn't the first time he had tried to coax you into bed and it wouldn't be the last, that was for sure. At first you had hoped that he would give up, it had been a month since you'd met, but he was still going strong, despite having a different woman in that apartment almost every night.

Maybe he's just really horny after being trapped in a lab all these years. Then again- You remember all the articles you read about him from the 80s, the ones that recorded his numerous escapades and think about his founding of Herogasm.

Maybe he's always like that, but he never comes on to Annie or Kimiko, only me. And I've threatened castration multiple times. You'd think he would care more about that than anything else.

You consider with a frown, clutching your jacket tighter around you. Rain trickled down from your hair and under the collar of your jacket to soak into your t-shirt. Your once light blue jeans were soaked to a dark navy with the amount of water that splashed up from the road and dripped down your back. For the first time in forever, you wished that it wasn't raining.

Probably should have just gotten a cab, but it's so expensive and-

"Hey baby." Someone calls from behind you.

Can't I just walk home without being hit on? One time?

"Not interested." You shout back, continuing to squish down the cracked sidewalks.

Three shadows peel off the wall of shops to your left blocking your path forward. Each is wearing a dark colored hoodie hiding their faces from view.

Is my luck really this bad? I never hear about Annie getting mugged or Hughie. And Hughie definitely looks wimpier than me.

"Don't be like that baby." The man behind you says.

You half turn your body so you can see all your supposed attackers at once. There are actually two men behind you, both wearing similar hoodies to the three now standing on your right.

Oh look they color coordinated their outfits… cute.

The man opens his mouth again.

"I'm gonna stop you right there." You hold up a finger. "I've been dealing with a horny 104 year old  geriatric man all day long. Please don't push me right now." It was an attempt to warn them, but you knew they probably wouldn’t listen to you.

No one ever does.

"Sounds like you need someone to relax with." The man smirks steeping forward to grab your arm. "I'd be happy to ease some of that tension baby."

"Look. I'm going to give you a chance to walk away. To avoid making one of the biggest mistakes of your life. Because honestly you all have the worst luck in the world." You jerk your arm away from him.

"I like em feisty.” He purrs stepping forward again while the others laugh. “Come on baby-“

He doesn't get to finish his sentence. You grab him around the throat, lifting him in the air like he weighs nothing, your eyes beginning to glow a brilliant green.

“I did try to warn you.”

"She's a supe!" He shouts struggling against your grip.

You throw him backwards into the other man standing to your right before facing the men on your left. Each one has pulled out a knife preparing to rush towards you.

"I get it. Y’all are out late, you bought matching outfits, but do we really have to-“

The first one rushes you, waving his knife through the air in a frantic dance. He doesn't get the chance to make contact with your arm. Vines erupt out of the pavement, breaking through the cracks in the concrete, binding themselves around the man who lets out a savage cry, quickly silenced while the vines continue to wrap around his body until there's nothing left but a mass of struggling green foliage on the pavement and some muffled screams.

He's lucky, could have had him dragged back under ground.

His friends stand there for a moment, eyeing one another as if they're not sure what just happened. You can practically see them trying to decide if you're still worth the trouble.

“Anyone else?”

The battle that follows is swift, the sound of cracking bones and the soft thud of punches landing echo over the soft patter of rain in the night as you dodge their blows and land your own against them. The vines continue to spread outward snatching up the men who fall to the ground in front of you, dragging each one up the street light above that sends yellowed light over the desolate streets. By now each bound body hangs from above like a sack of meat in a meat cooler, moving with the struggling men inside while the muffled cries shatter the still silence of the night.

Sometimes it's really too easy.

And as you begin to turn back someone grabs you by the hair, yanking you into their sweaty embrace. The leader's hot breath sticks to your cheeks, the cool metal of his switchblade pressing down so hard on your throat that you feel the pinprick of blood begin to form under the tip.

“What are you gonna do now bitch?” He snarls in your ear.

"Give you one more chance to surrender." You spit.

Like I'm going to give him the satisfaction of me begging for my life.

"I'm gonna enjoy this-" The man begins to say, pressing the knife deeper into your throat, but the rest of his sentence is cut off with a strangled cry as he's pulled away from you.

 What the hell just-

You turn around, freezing in shock.

Soldier Boy is crouching there in his t-shirt, jacket, and jeans over the man who just had a knife to your throat. His fist rising and falling as he punches the man in the face.

"Don’t you ever touch her." Soldier Boy snarls. His fist is already covered in blood, the man’s face a mass of bloodied tissue and bone.

"Stop you're going to kill him-" You run forward to stop Soldier Boy, but he doesn't stop even when you try to grab on to his hand.

"I said STOP." You shout louder, this time manipulating a vine to wrap around Soldier Boy's arm and restrain it.

Fuck he might already be dead.

"Let me go." Soldier Boy's eyes narrow. The usual green was replaced by a darkened pit with his rage. You'd only ever seen him this mad a handful of times, one of which was when the supe tried to zap you like a fly in one of those insect traps two days ago.

Why is he angry?

"I'm not going to let you go, until you promise not to kill him."

"I should." He snarls back at you.

"What are you talking about?"

He stands from the body, eyeing the last attacker who runs full speed down the sidewalk and vanishes into the darkness.   "I should kill him for trying to hurt you." Soldier Boy says simply.

You wave your hand allowing the vine to let go of his arm. "Where do you come off so high and mighty? You literally tried to kill me last month."

"That was before I-" He shakes his head angrily, eyes still blazing.

"Look I don't need you to protect me. Given what I've had to deal with all day I was looking forward to kicking some ass."

"You did." He smirks nodding his head in the direction of the men hanging from the streetlamp above you. “I just thought that you were outnumbered.”

"Why are you here?" You sigh pinching the bridge of your nose.

"I wanted to go for a stroll." Soldier Boy shrugs. He flexes his hand, before wiping the blood on the front of the sweatshirt of the man on the ground.

"Uh-huh. Well I don't need you to protect me." You say again, crossing your arms over your chest. "I had this handled."

"You sure doll?"

"Look I get it- you think that you're some knight in shining armor because you have this macho complex. But I'm fine on my own." You begin to step around the bodies of the men on the ground moving in the direction of your apartment, but Soldier Boy follows you.

"Where do you think you're going?" You turn to look at where he falls into step beside you.

"You shouldn't be walking home alone."

"Well you're sure as hell not going home with me."

His lip turns up in a smirk, towering over you. Soldier Boy is easily a foot taller than you, so broad that it's impossible to look past his imposing figure. It would be attractive if he wasn't so damn annoying. "Come on sweetheart, I know you want me to go home with you." He purrs with a smile. "I think you'd really enjoy it if I did. And I'll even let you tie me up with those pretty vines of yours." Ben leans in towards your face and you take a step back.

"Hard pass. So what? Is this your big move? Acting all chivalrous just to get a woman into bed with you?"

"That depends, is it working?"

"No. Now go back to the apartment, before I send you there in pieces." You turn back to squish down the sidewalk at a faster pace, hoping he will get a hint and leave you alone. But you knew he wouldn’t stop. He practically thrived on teasing you, had been the bane of your existence since you met him. And nothing seemed to dissuade him.

"What is your problem with me?" He jogs to catch up. "And don't say that it's because I tried to kill you, that was last month-"

"I think that's applicable to this week and the week after that and the week after that." You count out with every finger to further emphasize your point, but you know that Soldier Boy won't give up that easy.

"Are you always this fucking angry?" He almost laughs.

"I don’t know. Are you always this fucking annoying?" You turn to face him narrowing your eyes.

Soldier Boy chuckles at your look, running a hand through his hair that has darkened in the spray of water, his green eyes watching you curiously. They were shinning now, not the blacked pits of hate they were when he was beating the guy two minutes ago. For a second, just for a second, you see how handsome he is all over again.

"Come on, give me a real answer and I'll leave you alone." He's smiling at you now, giving you one of those boyish grins that, if it were anyone else, would make your heart stop.

He just wants sex. He doesn't care about you. He won't ever care about you. Breathe.

"Fine." You sigh. "You might say you're a supe, but you're not a hero. People like you and Homelander, you don't care about anyone but yourself. You use your powers for you and on your own terms. You were going to kill that guy-" You gesture back towards where the body is still on the ground, the man's heart beat is dangerously low.

"He was threatening you. A thank you might be nice." Soldier Boy's cheeks flush as he glares down at you with darkened eyes, his anger surging back in his chest.

"Yes he was threatening me, but I'm okay and you could have just taken him to jail. You didn't have to beat his face in."

"So you're saying if he had been attacking someone else you wouldn't have done the same?"

"I would have subdued him and then waited for the police to get there. The men hanging from the streetlight aren't dead. We aren't the law-"

"Right so those guys can get off with a warning and then go on and do the same thing over and over again." He scoffs rolling his eyes at you.

"It doesn't give you the right to kill them."

"I suppose you don't believe in the death penalty either."

"I believe in the death penalty Gramps. I just don't believe it is our job to carry it out." Your temper was flaring against your skin distracting you from the chill of the rain as it soaked into your clothes.

"Do you have any idea how many women would love to be saved by me?" Soldier Boy asks. He shakes his head as if he can't understand you.

You didn't blame him, most people didn't, that was why you spent most of your time alone.

"I'm not one of them. So leave me alone." You turn to go.

Honestly, why is this the kind of guy I attract? You roll your eyes to yourself. Oh you mean, tall, dark, handsome, gorgeous- The other little voice in your head whispers in your ear. NO. You tell yourself. Please I just want one guy who's not a total dick. Why is that so hard?

"I still don't think it's a good answer." He huffs.

"Of course you don't." You roll your eyes and begin to walk again. The streetlamps above send an eerie yellow glow over the parked cars along the road and over the crackled pavement. If Soldier Boy wasn't here bothering you, you might have stopped to admire the water as it splashed underneath the suspension bridge beyond the crowded buildings, but you wanted to get home. Without him if possible.

You glance over at Soldier Boy again. He looks normal right now, always does when he's not wearing his suit. And when he shut up you could see why people were so in love with him. It was when he opened his mouth that it reminded you exactly why you didn't like him.

You stop in front of your apartment building and force yourself to smile. "Thank you for walking me home." You say through tight lips, hoping that the false sincerity will make him leave.

He gazes up at your building with a frown. "This is a pretty shitty apartment building."

"Thank you. Not all of us inherited millions of dollars from our parents."

He pauses for a moment continuing to look up at the building, before he sighs loudly. "Look, I-." He sighs again. "I can't take listening to Annie and Hughie fucking. They go at it every night and she always makes the power go off."

You knew that already. It was another reason why you didn't like staying at the apartment, because listening to your best friend get railed by her boyfriend was not your idea of a good time.

You look up at Ben, and for a second you see a glimmer of the truth, just a flash of something that wasn't like the misogynistic attitude he usually had and it made you pause. He almost looked, sad and it made you feel bad for him. Of course you felt bad for him before, when you found out his entire team just gave him away to be experimented on and when probably the woman that he'd come the closest to loving really didn't care about him at all.

It must be incredibly lonely to come back to a world where almost everyone you know is dead. Guilt builds in your chest at the thought. I had lost my fair share of people, but not everyone in my life and I certainly didn’t learn about it on the same day.

"You know I think that's the first honest thing you've ever said to me." You say quietly shifting from foot to foot.

He half-smiles. "Maybe."

You chew on the inside of your cheek considering. You weren't afraid of him. You knew that with your powers you could take him. You were stronger than most and harder to kill. And despite the bad things you thought about him and knew about him, you kinda thought he was relatively harmless, well, you didn't think he was a rapist.

"Fine. But you're staying on the couch. And if I wake up and you're anywhere near my bedroom, I'll castrate you." You warn as walk up to the front doors and type in the code to unlock them, with Soldier Boy following behind you.

When you make it to the third floor, you raise one hand to stop him from going any further. It falls against his muscular chest and you fail trying not to admire how it feels beneath your hand.

Why am I so thirsty?

"If you wanted to grab my chest doll, all you had to do was ask-" Soldier Boy begins to say, but you raise the hand to cover his mouth.

"Shh." You hiss. "We have to be quiet or Mike will come out-"

"Who?" He asks, muffled against your hand.

You hear a door down the hallway creak open, spilling yellowed light onto the dark blue carpet of the hallway. "Shit. Too late."

Mike steps out of his apartment with a wide smile as soon as he sees you. "HEY y/n!" He crows, waving his free hand enthusiastically. "I didn't know you were getting in so late, but I wanted to give you this." Mike holds out a giant casserole dish filled with something that you can't identify. It's multi colored with multiple layers, one of which looks suspiciously like rice and the next layer looks like cake.

There's no way I'm eating that. Maybe if I force feed it to Soldier Boy he'll leave me alone.

Mike was your neighbor, your neighbor who had lived next door to you for the past 2 years and was shamelessly in love with you. And as sweet as he was, there were a few things that you couldn't get past, most namely that he lived with his mother and that he had a mullet.

One time you'd had a nightmare about it ripping itself from his head, breaking in to your apartment, and smothering you in your sleep.

Not fun.

"Hey Mike." You smile tightly at him, dropping your hand from Soldier Boy's mouth. "Yeah I'm sorry I was out with some friends."

"You should have asked me to come! I love your friends." Mike smiles so wide you're afraid that it's going to break his face. “Especially Butcher. He’s so funny. Always joking-"

Poor Mike.

Every time that Butcher had come over to talk shop, he would mock Mike endlessly. And Mike was just too sweet to realize it. Hughie was the only one who actively tried to be nice to Mike, but even he found it difficult. Annie was the worst though, she'd tease you constantly about what your children would look like and had taken to photoshopping mullets onto pictures of babies and sending them to you at inopportune times.

"Maybe next time." You cough out an awkward laugh while Soldier Boy snorts behind you.

You continue down the hallway towards your apartment, the door next to his, and hope that he'll go back into his home, but no such luck.

“My mom made this for you!” He holds the dish out towards you.

“Oh um that’s so nice of her. But I can’t except that-“

Mike's mother comes to stand in the doorway of their shared apartment. She was wearing a bright purple Mumu, her makeup caked thickly on her face and her eyes accentuated with bright blue eye shadow. “Sure you can sweetie. You’re Mike’s special friend.” She winks before trailing her eyes up and down your body. “And you’ve got such a cute little figure.” His mother does a little shimmy as if trying to get you to do the same.

Kill me now.

“That’s what I keep telling her.” Soldier Boy purrs behind you.

“Don’t make me kill you.” You mutter back, knowing full well he can hear you with his super-hearing.

Oddly enough Mike does look suspiciously like his mother, they are both the same height, exactly three inches under you, and have the same mullet, but hers is a shocking blue-gray and his is jet black.

He blushes at her words. “Aww mom.”

Soldier Boy muffles a laugh before disguising it into a cough. You elbow him hard in the stomach.

“Well thank you.” You take the casserole dish with one hand, hoping that you can open the door and usher Soldier Boy in before he makes a comment. "I've had a long day and it's really late-"

“I helped her make this one.” Mike interrupts scooting closer to you, so close that you get a lungful of his terrible cologne, the one that the super sells for four dollars and smells like baby powder and Cheez-its.

“A man who can do it all.” Soldier Boy whispers to you.

Mike looks above your head as if noticing Soldier Boy for the first time. “Who’s that? I thought I knew all your friends.”

“He’s certainly very handsome-“ Mike's mother blushes from the doorway.

“Your brother?” Mike offers.

You can see his expression turn hopeful.

Probably thinking about how he can become friends with "said brother" and that will escalate our "relationship." 

“I’m Ben.” Soldier Boy says, stepping around you to shake Mike’s hand. “I’m y/n's boyfriend.”

Your cheeks bloom a bright pink, unable to respond to the ridiculous statement that he just made.

Murder. That's what sounds good right now.

“Oh.” Mike’s face falls. “I didn’t know you had a boyfriend.” His eyes flick back to you, disappointment swimming in the irises.

You watch Mike’s hope begin to circle the drain.

“Well actually-“ You begin, but Soldier Boy interrupts you.

“Sorry I’ve been out of town for a while. We've been trying to do this long distance thing- you know how it is, late night phone calls-“ Ben trails off with a wolfish grin before dropping an arm around your shoulders. “But I just couldn’t take the long distance. Missed her too much. Phone call isn’t the same as sleeping in the same bed. Definitely not as satisfying. Not to mention there’s only so much my hand can do.”

Your cheeks bloom an even brighter red at his insinuation.  That’s when Soldier Boy does something even more unforgivable, he pulls you tighter against him and kisses you right there in front of Mike and his mother. The kiss is searing, making everything in your mind go blissfully blank. It had been so long since someone kissed you, since someone had held you this close to them without trying to kill you. His tongue teases your bottom lip and before you can stop yourself you open your mouth wider to let him in sighing softly against his lips, while you grip the front of his jacket.

For a moment you can’t remember why you didn’t want him to kiss you, why you denied yourself of this for so long. And then Soldier Boy's hand slides from your back to grab a handful of your ass.

Right.

You slap him so hard across the face that you're sure it would have broken the cheekbone of anyone who wasn’t a supe.

But Soldier Boy only grins wider, squeezing your butt again. “She knows that I like it a little rough.” He turns his lazy gaze back to Mike.

You open your mouth to cuss him out.

“Well we should probably get going.” Soldier Boy breezes. “Probably going to be a long night. If you know what I mean. But we’ll try to keep it down. Then again my girl's a little loud.” He winks at your poor neighbor who looks like he might cry, while his mother stands behind him fanning herself like Soldier Boy is everything she wants in a man.

He's ten for ten with the older ladies I'll say that.

“Oh right. Well I guess I’ll see you around y/n.” Mike turns to go.

“Mike wait-“ You try to say but he’s already vanishing through the door.

“Nice to meet you Mark.” Soldier Boy calls at his retreating figure, getting his name wrong on purpose.

You don’t even use your key to open the door you're so mad, the plants inside let you in. As soon as it opens, you haul Soldier Boy by the front of his jacket through the doorway and pin him to the wall just inside.

The casserole dish lands on your counter and by some miracle doesn’t break.

“What the hell is your problem?” Your hand is fisted in the front of his shirt, eyes blazing with anger and embarrassment.

He only grins. “You didn’t want me to play along? Sounded like that guy had been trying to get into your pants for a while. Unless he already has been or you want him to?"

You flush a deeper shade of crimson. "That is absolutely none of your business!"

“Well if we’re going to be living together doll, I’m pretty sure it is my business.”

“WE AREN'T LIVING TOGETHER I'M JUST LETTING YOU CRASH ON THE COUCH TONIGHT AND THEN YOU'RE GONE.” You shout.

“I think you’re gonna get pretty attached to me sleeping here. Maybe even  you let me sleep in your bed and even fu-“

You knock him back against the wall again. “If you finish that sentence I’m going to throw you out the window.”

“If you keep knocking me around, Mike's going to think you’re into some pretty kinky stuff.” Soldier Boy smirks down at you. “It’s actually turning me on a bit. Is it turning you on?”

“I don’t have to let you stay here.” You growl, releasing him.

“I think it’s because you like me.” He teases.

“I don’t.” You frown grows. “Okay couch is there goodnight.”

You point in the direction of the worn leather couch. You'd hauled it up three flights of stairs with Annie when you first moved in after you found a guy online selling it for nothing. And when you showed up to get it, he presumed to say it would be free if you let him take a picture of your feet. And after, when he had a black eye and a fun story to tell his wife, he gave you the couch for nothing as promised.

“No kiss goodnight?” Soldier Boy pouts his lips innocently.

“You already had one of those.” You snap thinking about slapping him again and trying hard not to think about how much you wanted to kiss him again.

Get a grip.

“Right. You liked it.”

“No I didn’t. And the next time you shove your tongue into my mouth I’ll bite it off.”

“You’re really violent for such a little thing.” Soldier Boy eyes you up and down as if sizing you up.

“And you’re really dick-like for someone who’s supposed to have the wisdom of the ages.” You turn towards the hallway intent on going to bed to avoid any more conversation with him.

"Whoa." You hear Soldier Boy say as he looks into your living room.

It was the reaction that everyone had when they entered your apartment. You had a small one bedroom apartment on the third floor of a building that you believed might be older than Soldier Boy. The kitchen and living room was mostly one room, the kitchen to the left with outdated appliances and a small circular wooden table with three chairs that served as your kitchen table and desk, and was separated by the large leather aforementioned couch that faced the wall that held two large windows. Beyond the front door was a small hallway that held the only bathroom in the apartment and your bedroom.

But that's not what was surprising.

Every open space in your apartment was covered in plants. There wasn't a single piece of unused space in your apartment. There were large standing monstera and fiddle leaf figs shoved into every corner and pots of dark green pothos bolted into the walls trailing vines to the ground so that every wall looked alive. Jasmine crept along the wall behind the tv that sat on an antique credenza between the two windows, sending the bright scent into the living room.

There was a large rectangular box bolted in the space above your sink where herbs and tomatoes hung down, probably a fire hazard, but you didn't care. The vibrant smell of mint, the spicy smell of rosemary, and soft tones of oregano and basil fused the air in your apartment with a life force that was impossible to ignore.

A large apple tree grew in a pot as big around as you next to the couch, with brilliant red apples hanging from it's branches, while a lemon tree and a tangerine tree intertwined their branches just behind the kitchen table.  The refrigerator, once white, was covered in the tangled vines of blackberry and raspberry, hanging with full fruit, while a potted strawberry plant sits prettily on top of the kitchen table, the bright red fruit enticing.

It was a lot. You knew it was a lot, but helping plants grow was the only thing you were good at, the only thing that felt right. One day you hoped that you could move somewhere and open a farmers market, but today you were stuck here, with Soldier Boy, who probably thought that you were crazy.

"I mean. I knew you had plant powers but this is-" He begins to say.

"A lot. I know." You roll your eyes. "The bathroom is down the hall." You gesture with your free hand towards the darkened hallway. "I guess I'll get you a pillow."

Ben is still looking around the room dumbfounded, as if he's never seen anything like this in his life, and he probably hasn't.

He's been in a Russian Lab for the past forty years, I mean he's probably not used to seeing anything this green.

You find the extra pillow in the linen closet along with one of the crocheted granny square blankets you made last year when Annie and you had a Jaws movie marathon, and a towel, before you move back into the living room.

Ben is still standing awkwardly by the couch as if he's not sure what to do, and it's the first time you've seen him look lost.

"Here." You throw him the pillow and the towel before you drape the blanket over the back of the couch. "One night."

"Why are you working for Butcher?"

"What?" The question catches you off guard. You were expecting him to make another pass at you, maybe check you out again. He was looking at you, but it was different, his gaze was softer, curious.

"You don't seem like you-" He gestures around the room. "Like you fit."

You blink for a second. "Um."

"I mean Annie used to be one of the Seven, Hughie does whatever the fuck Butcher tells him, but you you're different." His brow furrows together as if he can't figure you out.

"I really don't want to do this with you."

"This?" He looks confused again.

"Opening up with one another. You're here for one night. That's it." You force yourself to say, but the reality was you were still surprised, surprised that he actually seemed to care.

Stop. He's changing tactics because nothing else worked. He's pretending to care about you because he still wants to sleep with you.

"Please."

You can't answer for a second. It was the first time that he'd said that word in front of you before, or acted this way. It was also the first time that it had just been the two of you, before Butcher had been there or Frenchie or Annie and Hughie, but this was the first time that the two of you had been left alone.

Maybe that's why?

You hesitate before you answer, he was the last person you really wanted to open up to.

"I don't know, it's not all that bad." You shrug. "Before I didn't really use my powers all that much except like this." You gesture around the room for emphasis. "And when I went to college everyone was so serious about their futures and I didn't really like any of the classes. The only thing I enjoyed was using my powers at Please Don’t Die, the plant store I work at. And then Annie asked me to come help her out-" You bite your cheek. "She's my best friend and maybe I wanted to spend more time with her."

"But is it what you really want?" He cocks his head to the side, holding the pillow in one hand and the towel in the other.

You'd never seen him look so calm before, relaxed, like being here with you was washing away any anger or frustration he still had about the past. It was confusing, and at the same time you could feel your heart beginning to betray you. It was hard not to fall for him when he looked so good, eyes soft, dark hair falling into his eyes, clothes still dripping rain on your hardwood floors.

No. I will not fall in love with him, I will not fall in love with-

"Goodnight Soldier Boy. I'll see you in the morning." You turn to go, ignoring his final question.

"You can call me Ben." He almost whispers it, the sound of his voice a low rumble that sends a shiver down your spine.

"What?" You look back at him.

"You never call me Ben. But you can, if you want." He shrugs his shoulders, before he shakes his head as if he's annoyed with himself for suggesting it. "Never mind, just fucking forget about it-"

"Goodnight Ben." You feel the end of your mouth twitch up into a smile and with that you disappear into your bedroom, locking the door behind you.

And deep down you know that it's not to keep him out, but to keep you in.

As always, thank you so much for reading!

If you liked this story be sure to read my follow up fic that takes place in the future:

Open Mic Night!

Or if you'd like to read another series please try:

You Call It Madness But I Call It Love!

If The Stars Wish It So

A/N: I know it's crazy to start another series right now, but I'm kinda feeling this reader and Ben together? What do y'all think about it?

A/N: Update I've made a huge mistake and started another series.

If you'd like to be added to the taglist please let me know!

(Photos for series picture from Pinterest)

Taglist: @roseblue373 @mrsjenniferwinchester

[bie-tch]

To be completely honest, I don't really think Kai will become a centipede monster. I knowww it's sad but my reason as to why is pretty agreeable I think.

Usually, whenever a character is transformed into a monster or just a non-human in general, it's always been about accepting and overcoming parts of yourself youd rather hide. When Zane was revealed to be a nindroid, he learned that the others would accept him as their brother no matter what, and soon enough, it became a strength for him. Literally, he gained his true potential shortly after. He no longer sees him being a nindroid separate to his identity. He went from Zane, a ninja, to Zane, the titanium ninja. He's still him, always will be, just shiny :)

When Jay was turned into a Venomari, it became a reflection of his insecurities, the parts of himself he tries to mask with flashy bravado and exaggerated stories, especially around Nya, who he had a massive crush on. It ended similarly to Zane, where Nya said he would accept him no matter what. Flaws and all. Knowing this, He was able to gain his true potential too. Realizing that being himself was far better than covering it up with glitter and foundation.

Then when Cole became a ghost, it was a tragedy. He no longer felt like himself, no longer saw himself as a person. Instead a living husk of his former glory. But, with the encouragement and unyielding support of his teammates, his family, he learned to accept this new body of his, as inhuman as it was. It symbolized trauma, and the strength it takes to see the good in every bad situation. It carries later into the show, where even though he's back to being a human, the scars are still there. They will never truly go away, but he learned to accept himself as himself, weird ghost scars and all.

Lloyd is the definition of grappling with identity. From being the son of Lord Garmadon, to becoming the legendary Green Ninja, then the ultimate Spinjitzu Master, then returning to simply being the Green Ninja, knowing hes half Oni half dragon, and ultimately just Lloyd? He carries many versions of himself, each with parts he struggles to accept. He’s the textbook case of change: from idolizing his father to fearing he’ll become him. It’s this internal conflict that makes it so hard for him to see himself as anything other than a ninja. While we see him begin to accept his identity later in the series, DR shows us that he still has some ways to go before he truly feels at home in his own skin.

Nya's transformation was also just.. unwanted, in my opinion. It was about doing everything you can to protect the ones you love, even if it hurts you. She's very similar to Kai in this regard, and it's very realistic that they share similar ideals when it comes to how they view their role in the team. Nya thought that merging with the sea was the only option, and faced with Jay unconscious after drowning, she had no choice. It was unwanted change, similar to Cole. This time, however, instead of Nya bringing herself back, it was the others who brought her back. It's a beautiful way to show that family will go through hell and beyond if it means protecting the ones you love.

What does this all mean, however? Why do these transformations matter?

Well, here's an answer. Despite everything, despite the hardships, they all came out of it better. They came out of it having learned something positive about themselves, even though it scarred them tremendously. Think of it like a caterpillar. In order to transform into butterfly, they have to break down and rebuild. In the end, the transformations ended up becoming a reminder to stay strong and steadfast. And it's nice that everyone had a moment like that.

Weeelllll.... not everyone.

Kai is the only one who hasn’t undergone a non-human arc, and that’s surprising, considering he’s probably one of the first characters you'd expect to experience one. With his personality and tendency to hide things from others in fear of being shamed or shunned, an arc like that would benefit him. Right?

This is where monstrosity comes in I fear. And not in a good way.

I think this series will be contradicting what those arcs symbolized. I think it will become the opposite to what the other ninja experienced. I dont think Kai will turn into a centipede creature or just any monster in general. No, not really. And that might be confusing, because In order to survive the land of the monsters, you need to become one yourself, right?

But i still think Kai will be the only one not to undergo a non-human transformation. Not because it wont happen, but because he doesn't need to. In fact, I think it matches the others perfectly. Everyone in the team became a monster physically, but they stayed the same. Same likes, same hates, just with different colored skin or lack thereof. They didn't change, their views didn't change, their morals didn't change.

But Kais did.

And Kai is.

He is a monster.

Maybe not physically, maybe not literally,

But mentally. But his actions were.

And that's enough, isn't it?

[xjulixred45x]

I just need to say that I LOVE your work, especially the ones that can be read as platonic.

So as an inverse of the parent Yuu post, let me suggest a child!Yuu, you can decide the age, but I was thinking like under 10 because

1. It is very funny to imagine a kid being involved in all the teenager drama.

The way that thing would go is just so funny. I am a pacifist, guilty, fan of Papa Crowley, but imagine him as a person who still would give Kid!Yuu the tasks as the original one is hilarious.

3. Platonic twist boys, my beloveds.

And I think that Kid!Yuu could be those kids who are a little up on the time; ngl, I like neglect Reader/Mc/Yuu content a lot so lets put a little a bit of it too.

I guess this is it; it sounds more like me divagating than anything else, but okay. Remember to eat something, stay hydrated, and keep up the good work.

-🐦‍⬛✨

Aww, thank you so much! I love the platonic content in any series, but especially in Twisted Wonderland because I relate to many of the characters' struggles (I had a really difficult period of depression as a teenager, among other things), so part of me just wants to go and give them a hug.

Technically, I already have a series of posts as Child! Yuu, but I understand what you're saying and I like it!

Probably Child! Yuu did something rash like letting go of their parents' hands while crossing the street and was hit by the black carriage and transported to TWST. Either way, at first they didn't see the gravity of the situation, precisely because of the childlike mentality of now being in their own version of Alice in Wonderland (not in those exact words, but definitely with that train of thought).

In this way, they quickly becomes friends with Ace, Deuce, and Grim. After all, there isn't much to do while Crowley tries to "bring them back home." So they tries to have fun however they wants, without worrying about anything until the incident with the monster in the mine (perhaps it happens slightly differently here, but with the same essence and result). It's from this point on that Child! Yuu is generally more protected by Deuce, Ace and Grim.

Crowley lets Yuu live within the institution instead of Ramshackle, and is surprisingly present when it comes to the little child from another world. It's not uncommon to see Yuu sleeping in his office, stealing his hat, or even tucked into his coat when there's nothing else to do. When they ask Crowley about it, he simply says he allows them this kind of closeness because he's "very kind," but the truth is everyone can see the clear favoritism (which is why, if any student breaks something, they blame Yuu directly, knowing it will simply be swept under the rug. If it were any other student, it would be an instant detention).

Riddle is sincerely concerned that Ace and Deuce will be bad influences on Yuu, so he lets them know that he won't tolerate any out-of-character behavior with such a young child present (things like rude gestures, swearing, obscene signs, as he says, will be severely punished even without Yuu's presence). However, he also has his restrictions for Yuu, such as a limited amount of candy (he doesn't want the kid to get cavities so early in life), they can only play with the hedgehogs for the same amount of time they studies/reads a book, etc.

Riddle post-Overblot is much softer on Yuu as a child, especially if Yuu themself has a history of neglect from their family in their world. Riddle himself has fresh childhood wounds, so he doesn't want this GOOD child to end up swallowed up by pain and trauma the same way he was. If he can contribute to making Yuu's childhood happier, then he'll gladly do so.

Leona doesn't like children; I think we can consider that a universal truth. At least not loud and nosy children, and Yuu initially counted as loud and nosy, though one thing Leona found funny about them was that the child acted much older than they actually was, as if they could do something to him. Yuu isn't scary, not one bit, but they're not afraid of anything, so Leona respects their courage.

There are some things Yuu says that show they didn't have a good upbringing in their world, and that leads to something new: sympathy. Leona isn't easy on the kid, obviously, but he doesn't leave them to fate (whether it's sending Jack to make sure the kid stays alive or Ruggie to bring em something extra). Let's just say that Yuu and Leona, in a weird way, understand each other.

Azul definitely tries to take advantage of Crowley's favoritism toward Yuu to get him to make a deal with him, but fortunately Yuu understands the concept of "stranger danger" and avoids him at all costs. After Book 3, however, Yuu started stopping by Octavinelle if he wanted something better than cafeteria food (or the food Crowley gave them). Floyd especially loves to play (non-lethal way) with Yuu; it's not uncommon to see him running around campus with Yuu on his shoulders (usually screaming, either from happiness or fear, that is the question).

I don't think Child!Yuu can join the first-year classes for obvious reasons, but Azul is quite willing to give them private lessons so they doesn't stagnate in their education (with a small fee that Crowley has to pay, of course). Though sometimes it seems like it's just an excuse for Yuu to come to Octavinelle when they're too overwhelmed by Crowley's disasters.

Kalim finds Yuu adorable! He has some trouble taking his hands off them—he just wants to squeeze their face, hug them, and GHAAAAA! He totally has bouts of cute aggression. With Kalim's massive amount of siblings, you can expect him to be especially empathetic and protective of younger Yuu; he can't help but see them as his little sibilings.

Kalim gets really sad whenever Yuu mentions anything that implies they didn't have loving parents or a happy childhood in general, which can lead to a cuddle session on his part, assuring Yuu that they'll never want for anything while in Scarabia (and Kalim makes sure he lives up to that promise). If it weren't for Crowley (and his age), Kalim would have already adopted Yuu as a little sibiling.

By the events of Book 5, Yuu is already showing more signs of nostalgia and missing their world than before, even to the point of changing attitude. Vil is probably one of the people who notices this change when he sees them interacting with Ace and Deuce (during their time in Ramshackle). Vil isn't gentle with anyone under any circumstances, but it worries him a little to see this normally cheerful and energetic child suddenly so downcast and sad. That doesn't look good, honey. No child should look so broken.

Vil is probably the only one of the dorm leaders who goes directly to Crowley with his concerns. Even if he takes the director's promises with a grain of salt, he does make it his mission to make sure Yuu is okay, both physically and psychologically. This includes using an outing or event as an excuse for Yuu to have fun, or even turning a blind eye to things he normally wouldn't allow (eating sweets or junk food, getting dirty while playing, etc.).

Idia knew about Yuu from the rumors surrounding them, but he didn't really think they'd ever really interact until the events of Book 6. After that, there's a good chance Ortho and Yuu became good friends (being the closest in age to Yuu), so Idia went from never seeing Yuu to seeing them a few times on an average day. Sometimes the older brother instinct extends to Yuu too (maybe because they reminds him of Ortho in a way), in things like keeping Yuu from touching things they shouldn't, patting them on the head when they gets an answer right, etc.

Idia is...awkward for comfort, but he tries, genuinely tries. Besides, it's very likely that he himself is looking for a way to get Yuu back home, not only because he KNOWS Crowley isn't doing shit, but because there are surely people going crazy looking for Yuu in their world (maybe not the parents, but another family member must surely be very worried about them).

Malleus was always curious about the human child who unexpectedly arrived in his life. Not only was they not afraid of him, but they saw him in a way that Malleus could only describe as fascination and curiosity, something truly incredible to him. For this reason, Malleus constantly followed Yuu, whether to prevent the kid from hurting themself or being hurt by others, but he also ended up enjoying their company, their simple way of seeing the world, even seeing him.

For this reason, Malleus quickly noticed when his young friend began to become more discouraged, struggling to keep up with the tasks the adults assigned them (quite irresponsibly, he could say). Malleus understands to a certain extent (he compares this to how he used to miss Lilia when he went on trips), so if Yuu needs someone to listen to them the way they listens to others, Malleus has his arms open.

________

(ESPAÑOL)

Awwww muchas gracias! Amo el contenido platónico de cualquier serie, pero especialmente en Twisted Wonderland porque me identifico con muchas de las luchas de los personajes (tuve una etapa depresiva muy difícil en la adolescencia, entre otras cosas), por lo que una parte de mí solo quiere ir y darles un abrazo.

Ya tengo técnicamente una serie de posts como Child! Yuu, pero entiendo lo que dices ¡y me gusta!

Probablemente Child!Yuu hizo algo precipitado como soltarse de la mano de sus padres al cruzar la calle y fue golpeado por el carruaje negro y transportado a TWST. De cualquier manera, al principio no veían la gravedad de la situación, justamente por la mentalidad infantil de ahora estar en su propia versión de Alicia en el país de las maravillas (no con esas palabras exactas, pero definitivamente con ese tren de pensamiento).

De esa forma se hace amigo de Ace, Deuce y Grim bastante rápido, después de todo no hay mucho que hacer mientras Crowley trata de “regresarlo a casa”, asi que trata de divertirse como quiera, sin preocuparse por nada hasta el incidente con el monstruo en la mina (talvez aquí pasa de forma ligeramente diferente, pero con la misma esencia y resultado). Es a partir de aquí que Child!Yuu es mas resguardado por Adeuce y Grim en general.

Crowley deja que Yuu viva dentro de la institución en vez de ramshackle, y es sorprendentemente presente cuando se trata del pequeño niño de otro mundo. No es raro ver a Yuu durmiendo en su oficina, robando su sombrero o incluso metido en su abrigo cuando no hay nada que hacer. Cuando le preguntan a Crowley al respecto, el simplemente dice que le permite este tipo de cercanía porque es “muy amable” pero la verdad todos pueden ver que hay un claro favoritismo (por lo mismo, si algún estudiante rompe algo, directamente culpan a Yuu, porque saben que entonces simplemente será barrido bajo la alfombra. Si fuera cualquier otro estudiante seria detención instantánea).

Riddle sinceramente está preocupado de que Ace y Deuce sean unas malas influencias en Yuu, por lo que les hace saber que no va a tolerar ningún comportamiento fuera de lugar con un niño tan joven presente (cosas como gestos groseros, malas palabras, signos obscenos, como él dice, serán severamente castigados incluso sin la presencia de Yuu), sin embargo, también tiene sus restricciones para Yuu, como un número limitado de dulces (no quiere que el nene tenga caries tan temprano en la vida), solo puede jugar con los erizos el mismo tiempo que estudio/leyó un lbro, etc.

Riddle post Overblot es mucho más blando con Yuu niño y más si el propio Yuu tiene un historial de negligencia por parte de su familia en su mundo. Riddle mismo tiene heridas de la infancia frescas, por lo que no quiere que este niño BUENO termine absorbido por el dolor y trauma de la misma forma que él lo hizo, si él puede contribuir que la infancia de Yuu sea más feliz, entonces lo hará encantado.

Leona no le gustan los niños, creo que podemos considerar eso una verdad universal. Al menos los niños ruidosos y entrometidos, y Yuu al principio contaba como ruidoso y entrometido, aunque algo que Leona encontraba gracioso de él es que el niño actuaba como si fuera mucho más grande de lo que realmente era, como si pudiera hacer algo contra EL. Yuu no asusta, ni un poco, pero no le tiene miedo a nada, por lo que Leona respeta sus agallas.

Hay algunas cosas que Yuu dice que dejan ver que no tuvo una buena crianza en su mundo, y eso lleva a algo nuevo, simpatía. Leona no es suave con el niño, obviamente, pero no lo deja a su suerte (ya sea mandando a Jack para asegurarse de que el niño siga vivo o Ruggie para llevarle algo extra). Digamos que Yuu y Leona, de una forma rara, se entienden.

Azul definitivamente trata de aprovecharse del favoritismo de Crowley hacia Yuu para que asi haga un trato con él, pero afortunadamente Yuu conoce el concepto de “peligro extraño” y lo evitaba a cualquier costa. Después del libro 3, sin embargo, Yuu empezó a pasar por Octavinelle si quería algo mejor que la comida de la cafetería (o la comida que le daba Crowley). Floyd especialmente le encanta jugar (de forma no letal) con Yuu, no es raro verlo correr por el campus con Yuu en sus hombros (normalmente gritando, de felicidad o de miedo, esa es la cuestión).

No creo que Child!Yuu pueda unirse a las clases de los de primer año por obvias razones, pero Azul esta bastante dispuesto a darle clases particulares para que no se estanque en su educación (con una pequeña cuota que Crowley tiene que pagar por supuesto). Aunque a veces parece que es solo una excusa para que Yuu venga a Octavinelle cuando esta muy sobrecargado de los desastres de Crowley.

Kalim encuentra a Yuu adorable! Tiene ciertos problemas en quitarle las manos encima ¡simplemente quiere apretarle la cara, abrazarlo y GHAAAAA! Completamente tiene ataques de cute agression. Con la cantidad masiva de hermanos que tiene Kalim, puedes esperar que sea especialmente empático y protector con un Yuu más joven, no puede evitar ver en ellos a sus hermanos pequeños.

Kalim se siente muy mal cada vez que Yuu menciona algo que denota que no tuvo padres amorosos o una infancia feliz en general, lo que puede llevar a una sesión de abrazos por su parte y asegurarle a Yuu que nunca le faltara nada estando en Scarabia (y vaya que Kalim se asegura de cumplir esa parte). Si no fuera por Crowley (y su edad), Kalim ya habría adoptado a Yuu como hermanito.

Para los eventos del libro 5, Yuu ya empieza a tener mas signos de nostalgia y de extrañar su mundo que antes, incluso llegando a cambiar de actitud, y probablemente una de las personas que se da cuenta de este cambio es Vil cuando le ve interactuar con Ace y Deuce (durante el tiempo que estuvieron en ramshackle). Vil no es suave con nadie bajo ninguna circunstancia, pero le preocupa un poco mucho ver a este niño normalmente alegre y enérgico, de la nada, tan desplomado y triste. Eso no se ve bien, cariño, ningún niño debería verse tan acabado.

Vil es probablemente el único de los líderes de dormitorio que va directamente con Crowley con sus preocupaciones, aun si toma con un gran gramo de sal las promesas del director, lo toma en sus manos asegurarse de que Yuu esté bien, tanto física como psicológicamente, ya sea usando de excusa alguna salida o evento para que Yuu se divierta, incluso haciendo la vista gorda de cosas que normalmente no le permitiría (comer dulces o comida chatarra, ensuciarse al jugar, etc.)

Idia sabia de Yuu por los rumores que había a su alrededor, pero realmente no pensó que llegarían a interactuar de verdad hasta los eventos del libro 6. Después de eso, hay una buena posibilidad de que Ortho y Yuu se hicieran buenos amigos (al ser lo más cercano en edad a Yuu), por lo que Idia paso de no ver nunca a Yuu a verle unas cuantas veces en un dia promedio. a veces el instinto de hermano mayor también se extiende a Yuu (talvez porque le recuerda de cierta forma a Ortho), en cosas como evitar que Yuu toque cosas que no debe, darle palmadas en la cabeza cuando dice bien una respuesta, etc.

Idia es…incómodo para el confort, pero lo intenta, genuinamente lo intenta. Además, es muy probable que el mismo este buscando una forma de regresar a Yuu a su casa no solo porque él SABE que Crowley no hace una mierda, sino porque de seguro hay gente que está perdiendo la cabeza buscando a Yuu en su mundo (talvez no sus padres, pero otra familia de seguro debe estar muy preocupada por ellos).

Malleus siempre sintió curiosidad por el niño humano que llego de forma inesperada a su vida, no solo no le tenía miedo, sino que lo veía de una forma que Malleus solo podía decir que era fascinación y curiosidad, algo verdaderamente increíble para él. Por lo mismo, Malleus seguía constantemente a Yuu, ya fuera para evitar que el niño se lastimara o que lo lastimaran, pero también termino disfrutando de su compañía, de su forma simple de ver el mundo, de verlo a él incluso.

Por lo mismo, Malleus noto rápidamente cuando su joven amigo empezó a estar más desanimado, a tener problemas para estar a la altura de las tareas que le dejaban los adultos (de forma bastante irresponsable, podía decir). Malleus entiende hasta cierto punto (compara esto con como el solia extrañar a Lilia cuando se iba de viaje), por lo que, si Yuu necesita a alguien que le escuche de la misma forma que el escucha a los demás, Malleus tiene los brazos abiertos.

Shares, reblogs and comments are very welcome!

[salt-clangen]

Moon 19 pt 1

Leaffall

AN: before anyone says anything, yes I’m now aware both these names have been used in canon. I didn’t know when I chose them, but found out after everything had been planned out. I’ve only read the series up until the Power of Three and haven’t read any of the prequels so there’s a lot of names I’m not aware of.

Ripplepaw and Otterpaw sat before the clan, their faces bright with eagerness as they stared up at Wolfstar.

In the crowd, Nightleap lingered in the shade, still recovering but well enough to attend, the cool leaf-fall breeze ruffling her black fur. Just behind the brothers sat Snowspeckle, SaltClan’s deputy and their proud mother, her tail flicking with excitement.

“Today is a glorious day for SaltClan,” Wolfstar began, her voice carrying clear over the crashing waves. “As we welcome two new warriors to our ranks.”

She paused as the clan’s cheers rose and fell, a smile curling on her face.

“Ripplepaw, Otterpaw, you both showed bravery and strength befitting true warriors during the nest ambush last moon,” she purred. Ripplepaw and Otterpaw sat up even taller, their chests puffed with pride. In the shadow of Wolfstar’s perch, Shadowdive quietly signed the words for Ripplepaw, his deaf brother.

“And now that your wounds have healed…” Wolfstar continued, her tone turning solemn, reverent.

“I, Wolfstar, leader of SaltClan, call upon our warrior ancestors to look down on these apprentices. I commend them to you as warriors in their turn.

Ripplepaw, Otterpaw — do you promise to uphold the warrior code and protect this clan, even at the cost of your lives?”

“I do!” the brothers answered in unison, Ripplepaw’s voice a little louder and tremulous, but just as fierce.

“Then by the powers of StarClan, I name you: Rippleclaw, for your adaptability and determination — and Ottersplash, for your loyalty and spirit!”

The clan erupted into cheers once more, voices echoing across the dunes.

“Rippleclaw! Ottersplash!”

Thistle wrinkled her nose as she dragged a bowl of water closer to Lynxdawn. “It was probably that trout,” she said with disdain, setting the bowl down with a thump.

Lynxdawn lay prone in her nest, trembling as she tried to resist the next wave of nausea. She whimpered, her voice thin. “Don’t talk about food, please.”

She looked more green than blue-pointed at this point, her usual soft glow dulled by sickness.

“Unless you’re pregnant,” Thistle added dryly, only half teasing.

Lynxdawn nearly gagged. “Don’t even joke like that,” she whined, tucking her chin into the moss as if she could disappear into it.

Thistle snorted and glanced over the herb shelves like she could make sense of them. “How long before your herbs kick in?”

“It’ll be a while,” Lynxdawn sighed, slumping further into her nest. “Thank you for helping.”

Thistle shrugged off the thanks, face drawn in her usual scowl. “The alternative was what? Stand around like a bump on a log while you cry and puke?”

Despite herself, Lynxdawn chuckled weakly. Thistle’s rough-edged way of speaking and odd phrases reminded her so much of Capri and Jade—dear friends she missed with an ache deeper than her stomach cramps.

“Ugh, I’m going to get so behind,” she mumbled, her mind drifting to all the tasks undone.

“It won’t be so bad,” Thistle said, oddly upbeat. “I can help. Those apprentices you sent out already got half the stuff you asked for.”

Lynxdawn rolled onto her side, purring softly. “My daughters are so helpful.” Her gaze softened as she spotted Coralpaw in the corner, gently entertaining Briarkit.

Thistle’s face twisted into a sneer again, but she lowered her head, settling stiffly by the den entrance.

“She should be out there learning, not kit-sitting,” Thistle muttered. “Her mentor’s walking around like she didn’t just keel over from heatstroke. She ought to be doing her job.”

“I know,” Lynxdawn sighed, her stomach churning again. “I spoke to Wolfstar. She’s splitting the apprenticeship between herself and Nightleap. I just… I wish there was someone who could take Coralpaw on fully.”

“Why can’t Wolfstar or someone else just do it completely?”

“Training a mediator or historian isn’t like training a regular warrior,” Lynxdawn explained, her voice gentler as she focused through the fog of her illness. “It takes so much more—history, diplomacy, philosophy… Wolfstar’s stretched too thin. Snowspeckle’s already mentoring an artisan. Ottersplash and Rippleclaw are too young, and Mallowstripe’s our only camp keeper.” She paused, grimacing faintly. “And Shadowdive’s a brilliant warrior, but…”

Thistle barked a short laugh. “He’s about as diplomatic as a fox in a henhouse. Got it.”

They both laughed, though Lynxdawn didn’t know what a henhouse was. Still, she enjoyed the company.

She tilted her head, studying Lynxdawn. “What about me?”

Lynxdawn’s ear twitched. “You?”

“I’m nearly walking normal again,” Thistle said, her tone almost casual. “And it’s not like mediators only fight or run. I could tutor Coralpaw until my back’s healed—then show her some real hunting and fighting. I’m not half bad at either.”

Lynxdawn turned the idea over in her tired mind. Thistle was sharp, no question about it, but she’d never seen her hunt or train. Still… there was something steady about her.

“You have a kit though,” Lynxdawn murmured. “I can’t take you away from Briarkit. Those first moons are everything.”

Thistle didn’t argue. She only ducked her head, her eyes fixed on the floor.

“You don’t want to miss that,” Lynxdawn said gently. “I think you’d make a wonderful mentor. Just… not yet.”

Silence settled between them, but not a heavy one. Thistle was a creature of quiet—calm even in disappointment.

“You could still help,” came a bright voice from behind.

Both cats jumped, spinning to see Coralpaw standing there with Briarkit tottering beside her, babbling nonsense.

“Eavesdropping, were you?” Thistle growled, but her tone was playful.

“You talk way too loud to spy on,” Coralpaw chirped, and Lynxdawn lazily swatted at her with a paw.

“But really,” Coralpaw went on, ignoring their bemused looks, “I like having Nightleap as a mentor. And I like everyone stepping in to teach me. It’s probably better for a mediator to learn from lots of cats.”

Thistle chuckled. “You’re pretty smart for a grey cat.”

Lynxdawn gasped in mock outrage and flicked a pebble at her. “Be nice to my kit!”

Briarkit, not wanting to be left out, babbled loudly at Coralpaw, drawing giggles from the older cats.

“Well, Corals,” Thistle said, her voice rich with amusement, “I’d be honored to give you a lesson or two. As you can see, I’ve got plenty of experience handling difficult personalities.”

The trio dissolved into light-hearted banter, playful jabs traded back and forth, only interrupted now and then by Lynxdawn’s queasy groans as the lazy afternoon stretched on.

It was midmorning when Wolfstar gave Dropletpaw and Kelppaw their first solo patrol—solo without mentors, at least. A light, misty heat clung to the rocks, the leaffall wind too lazy to stir it away. Somewhere out near the tide pools, gulls shrieked and fought, their cries high and wild.

Dropletpaw adjusted her herb belt for the third time. The weight of it dug into her hips, pulling uncomfortably at her fur. She shifted from paw to paw, heart already beating faster than it should.

“Hey,” Kelppaw said brightly, pawing at a plant. “Does this look like dock to you?”

Dropletpaw tugged the crinkled dock leaf from her belt for comparison. She sniffed it instinctively—earthy, green, a little tangy. She pressed her paw against the live plant’s veins, feeling for the roughness.

“Yeah,” she said at last, voice soft. “Definitely dock.”

Kelppaw beamed and neatly snipped a few leaves free with her claws, tucking them into her own pouch.

Dropletpaw tried to breathe through her nose and focus. Focus on the plants. Focus on the job.

Not on the way Wolfstar had looked when they dragged her back over the sand. Not on the way the blood had clumped in her fur. Not on the way Dropletpaw had done nothing but stand there like a kit.

“Look!” Kelppaw said, trotting ahead. “Chanterelles! Like the ones Rippleclaw likes. Let’s grab some.”

A patch of lumpy yellow mushrooms clustered at the base of a fallen log, their caps gleaming faintly in the damp.

Dropletpaw’s stomach twisted. Her mouth felt dry. “Maybe not today,” she said, stepping back. “We could grab the wrong kind. I don’t want anyone to get sick.”

Kelppaw just shrugged and moved on, the leather ties of her belt bouncing against her side. Her confidence was new, like the first green shoots of newleaf after a storm.

“I wonder if Mom got sick from eating the wrong mushroom,” Kelppaw said, half to herself.

Dropletpaw’s chest ached, but she said nothing.

Kelppaw didn’t seem to mind filling the silence. She chatted easily, weaving around thickets and stones.

“Shadowdive caught a fish with no eyes or fins the other day. Isn’t that weird? Mallowstripe said it could be a sign from Lostclaw. Do you think that’s bad?”

“I don’t wanna talk about that,” Dropletpaw muttered quickly, the fur along her shoulders prickling.

Kelppaw just nodded like it was the most normal answer in the world and kept going.

“The Artisan Knoll was awesome, though! I made a real clay bowl. It went into the oven and everything. Oh! And I’m learning cordage too. I’m gonna grab some bark if we find a good tree.”

Dropletpaw let Kelppaw’s voice wash over her, warm and steady. She focused on the feeling of her paws in the cool mud, the rustle of leaves above her, the distant crash of the surf. Steady. Steady.

Harvest carefully. Leave half. Check the stems. Check the roots.

It should have been comforting. But lately even the simplest rituals felt brittle.

The border ambush still clung to her like a second skin. She hadn’t been there—she hadn’t fought—but she had seen the aftermath. Heard the frantic shouts. Smelled the coppery blood that had soaked the sand.

A shadow fell across her paws. She blinked up to find Kelppaw waving a paw in front of her face.

“Hello?” Kelppaw said, half-laughing. “You’re zoning again.”

Dropletpaw’s ears burned with shame. “Sorry. I was, um. Thinking.”

Kelppaw just grinned. “I asked what you’ve been learning with Wolfstar.”

Dropletpaw dug her claws into the earth for grounding. “Um… I learned the first three leaders of each clan.”

She knelt beside a clump of yellowhead, the petals drooping like tired stars. She brushed dirt away from the roots with trembling care.

“That’s so cool!” Kelppaw said. “Tell me!”

Dropletpaw stole a glance at her sister. She was bright-eyed, expectant, bouncing slightly on her paws.

Somehow, that made it easier. The words tumbled out, halting but growing stronger:

“OakClan was the first clan ever. Their first leaders were Oakstar, then his daughter Bitestar, and then her son Duckstar.”

Kelppaw snickered. “Talk about favoritism.”

Dropletpaw laughed—a real, warm laugh that surprised even her. “It was actually pretty common back then.”

The border to the twolegplace loomed nearby, so they veered toward the clan graveyard instead.

The graveyard was a sacred place, filled with flowers covering the few graves they had. Recently, they had buried the body of the unknown cat found near the border—no name, no clan, but still deserving of a respectful resting place among their own.

“What about the other clans?” Kelppaw urged, brushing her side against her sister’s.

Dropletpaw didn’t hesitate this time. “DuskClan had Duskstar, then her adopted kit Scorchstar, and after them Longstar. HoneyClan had Honeystar, then her apprentice Petalstar, and then Ashstar, Honeystar’s nephew.”

Kelppaw’s eyes widened. “You’re amazing! I can’t even remember what I had for breakfast. You’re gonna be the best historian SaltClan ever had.”

Dropletpaw’s heart twisted—not with pain this time, but with something warmer, shakier. Hope.

“You’re amazing too,” she mumbled. “Your bowl sounds awesome.”

Kelppaw twined their tails together, brief and sure. “When we get home, I’ll show you. I was also thinking about making grave markers too. Thistle said twolegs do it—make symbols for their loved ones. I think it would be nice to make something for Ma and Fennelheart.”

Dropletpaw nodded, swallowing a lump in her throat. She thought of the unknown body buried alongside their dead—the nameless cat from the beach. They deserved to be remembered too, even if no one knew their name.

“That sounds… nice,” Dropletpaw whispered.

Together, they turned toward the graveyard, belts heavy with herbs, paws light on the sandy earth.

The salt wind finally stirred, tugging at their fur like a mother’s touch, carrying them forward into the day.

“You have no business being here,” Wolfstar growled, her claws slicing small cuts into the damp earth. The sharp wind tugged at her fur, carrying the salt-sting of the sea — and of danger.

Archstar stood a few paces away, their sleek pelt rippling like a the river behind them. Their amber eyes shone with unsettling warmth, as if they’d arrived only to share a pleasant morning.

“Oh, but I have every reason to visit you, dear Wolfstar,” they purred. “I heard about last moon’s little… incident.”

Wolfstar’s hackles rose.

“A trial was held,” she snapped. “The perpetrators have been dealt with.”

A sly smile tugged at Archstar’s mouth, their gaze sharpening.

“Oh no, no, not that,” they murmured, almost tender. “I meant the other tragedy.”

A cold shiver scraped down Wolfstar’s spine. She refused to glance over her shoulder, refused to search the misty trees for the being she could feel breathing down her neck.

Her voice dropped, brittle as frost.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Archstar tilted their head, studying her.

“It must’ve been terrifying,” they said, voice dropping low and sweet like poisoned honey. “Finding her like that. So small. So wrong.”

Were they talking about Nighthowl or the body?

It was impossible to tell without revealing too much, they shouldn’t know about either event.

Wolfstar’s paws itched to run — or to fight — but she forced herself still. Her breathing grew shallow.

“Get off SaltClan territory before I make you,” she hissed.

But Archstar only smiled, their tail curling lazily behind them.

“Darling,” they said, “don’t you want to know how she got there?”

The air seemed to tighten around them. Wolfstar sucked in a breath, the smell of wet earth filling her nose, grounding her.

“I heard you were asking around,” Archstar continued softly. “About Tall Water’s rogues. About the old sea cats.”

They lifted a paw, studying their claws like the whole thing bored them.

“You know, I wasn’t always a clan cat either. Before StarClan gave me a name, I was something…else.”

“I know what you were,” Wolfstar spat. “Are.” Her voice cracked with anger, but underneath was fear. Sharp, choking fear.

“Are you saying you put her there?”

Archstar chuckled — not meanly, almost pityingly. They didn’t answer.

Instead, they stepped closer, enough that Wolfstar could see the riverwater beading on their whiskers, smell the faint iron tang beneath their sweet breath.

“You could ask me,” they whispered. “I could tell you about the tides. About the things the sea brings back, no matter how hard you try to drown them.”

Wolfstar’s legs trembled, paws pressing into the cool earth until she could feel the heartbeat of the land itself.

“No.”

For a moment — just a moment — the mask slipped. Archstar’s smile faltered, their eyes softening into something almost desperate.

Wolfstar saw it. And she hated them for it.

“I don’t want anything from you,” she said dismissively. “My clan will notice I’m missing soon. When they find you, we’ll tear you apart.”

Archstar looked at her — really looked — the way a historian might study the stars, crumbling and proud.

“There’s nothing you want to know?” they asked one last time, voice almost childishly hopeful.

“No.”

Silence. Only the push and pull of the river against the stones.

At last, Archstar turned, the wind tugging their thin frame sideways as they walked to the stepping stones. Halfway across, they paused.

Then, without facing her, they said, almost gently. “Before I go, there’s something you should know.”

Wolfstar stayed rigid, every instinct screaming not to listen. But something in their voice — low, almost mournful — pinned her in place.

“Mothers leave pieces of themselves behind, Wolfstar. Some pieces don’t rest easy.”

They glanced over their shoulder, amber eyes glinting sharp as broken shells.

“You might think you know where you come from,” they said, voice carrying across the water, “but blood runs deeper than rivers. And some blood calls back the dead.”

Wolfstar stared, hollowed out by cold confusion.

Archstar gave a little bow, mocking or sorrowful — she couldn’t tell — and stepped lightly onto the stones, crossing the river until the mist swallowed them whole.

She stayed there long after they vanished, the ocean’s roar filling the silence, her paws numb against the sodden earth.

The graveyard crouched against the cliffside, ancient and half-forgotten. The grass grew wild here, tangled with salt-bitten weeds. Gentle flowers, now gone to seed, marked the sleeping places of SaltClan’s dead.

Wolfstar stood among them, her breath misting in the cool air.

The moon wore a thin veil of clouds tonight. Silver light struggled through in patches, staining the grass and her white pelt in ghostly grey.

She found Lostclaw’s grave easily.

The earth was still disturbed, the grass not yet reclaiming the broken ground. A small shell, left by someone — Lynxdawn, maybe, or Kelppaw — rested near the crest of the soil.

Wolfstar sat slowly, her tail curling around her paws, her bones aching with weariness she couldn’t shake.

“You got a grave,” she whispered to the dark earth. “You were honored. Why does it feel like it isn’t enough?”

The night answered only with the endless hush of the ocean below.

Her mind flashed, unbidden, to Sparkclaw’s words at the trial:

“There was something standing over her.”

“A shape. Wrong. Cold.”

“It was like the stars were hiding from it.”

Wolfstar shivered, digging her claws into the dirt as if to anchor herself.

She thought she should feel peace here. She wanted to. Instead, the air pressed heavy against her fur, like a storm waiting to split the sky. The grave almost seemed to hum — not loud, not a sound exactly, but a pulse, like a heartbeat deep underground.

A wave crashed against the rocks far below, the spray rising like mist over the cliffs.

In the curling fog, she thought — for just a moment — she saw a figure.

Small. Hollow. Watching.

She blinked and it was gone.

Wolfstar swallowed hard.

“You were seen,” she said aloud, not sure if she was speaking to Lostclaw or to herself. “You mattered. Isn’t that enough?”

A sudden gust of wind tore through the graveyard, rattling the driftwood marker.

It tapped against the shell behind it, tap, tap, tap, like restless paws.

Wolfstar’s chest tightened.

“We need to settle this…you and I.” She said, her voice unlike her own. “This has to end.”

She rose to her paws. Backed away.

The ground beneath her seemed to sigh as she left, or maybe it was only the sea breathing below.

As she reached the edge of the graves, she hesitated.

Glanced back.

The grave lay still.

But the feeling in the air — that pulse, that presence — clung to her. It was not angry.

It was… restless.

And not finished.

Cat allegiances:

Wolfstar- 25 moons. Leader. Responsible. Compassionate. Natural intuition. Apprentice- Dropletpaw.

Lynxdawn- 20 moons. Lead Cleric. Thoughtful. Faithful. Good teacher.

Snowspeckle- 36 moons. Deputy. Artisan. Loving. Thoughtful. Good singer. Apprentice- Kelppaw

Nighthowl- 76 moons. Warrior. Insecure. Lonesome. Watches humans. Condition: pregnant & Torn pelt.

Nightleap- 40 moons. Warrior. Insecure. Sneaky. Incredible runner. Apprentice- Coralpaw.

Thistle-30 moons. Warrior. Troublesome. Thoughtful. Keen eye. Condition: Broken back & recovering from birth.

Mallowstripe- 26 moons. Camp keeper. Nervous. Careful. Strange dreamer.

Shadowdive- 24 moons. Warrior. Blood thirsty. Loyal. Good swimmer. Apprentice-Sandpaw.

Ripplepaw→Rippleclaw- 12 moons. Warrior apprentice. Troublesome. Adventurous. Fast runner. Permanent condition: Partial Hearing Loss.

Otterpaw→Ottersplash- 12 moons. Warrior apprentice. Insecure→Competitive. Childish. Good swimmer.

Dropletpaw- 7 moons. Historian apprentice. Skittish→Nervous. Shy→Lonesome. Interested in clan history. Mentor-Wolfstar

Kelppaw- 7 moons. Artisan apprentice. Charming→Charismatic. Quiet→Responsible. Plays in mud. Mentor-Snowspeckle

Coralpaw- 7 moons. Mediator apprentice. Noisy→Flamboyant. Bossy→Confident. Never sits still. Mentor-Nightleap

Sandpaw- 7 moons. Warrior apprentice. Impulsive→Fierce. Noisy→Confident. Moss ball hunter. Mentor- Shadowdive.

Briarkit- 1 moons. Inquisitive. Shy. Picky nest builder.

Prev

Next

Moon 0

[codthefishgod]

Analysis post for episode 83 of Faroff, AKA Truth: Part 2

Split below for spoilers!

I am VERY sorry that this is late LMAO, this is probably one of my longest analysis posts so far and I haven't read through it all again yet so I hope it makes sense--knowing me I probably forgot something. 💀

Okay, unfortunately I did skip last episode's analysis post (I've been in a crappy place recently, I'm recovering more now though), BUT I'm BACK and THANK FUCK BECAUSE HOLY CRAP THIS EPISODE WAS JUICY-

First off, Tobias getting really and properly angry for the first time? Tobias in general seems to make a point of never showing ANY extreme emotions, happy or sad or otherwise. He's usually in a state of neutrality, and there have only been a handful of times where he's done otherwise (example of one of these times below.)

Fun fact, when I first saw this panel it was because someone on Instagram had it as their profile picture (they had it before the episode came out to non-Patreon subscribers), and I genuinely didn't think it was real (as in a canon panel) because I didn't think Tobias would show that much emotion until I actually saw the episode myself!

This is yet another way that he's the polar opposite of Fenn, considering Fenn is almost always showing extreme emotions and it's when he's calm that's odd for him.

Obviously this isn't because Tobias doesn't experience extreme emotions, but because it was dangerous to express any sort of vulnerability when he lived with his family. It's become ingrained in his behaviour.

So.

Him being genuinely, seriously, all out PISSED for the first time in Faroff history. Occurring at the same time as him being truly vulnerable about his past for the first time. It's no wonder that he has a lot of pent up anger about his past, considering everything, but what IS interesting is how it's manifesting, considering Tobias has never really directly spoken about his feelings towards his family on screen.

Most of his anger doesn't seem to be directed at his family for treating him badly, but at himself for not meeting their expectations.

He blames himself for them not showing him any love or attention. And he also seems to believe that maybe, just maybe, if he does the right thing or is in a bad enough situation, there's still a chance for them to accept him.

There's this panel to show that, not to mention that I've thought for a while that this is the reason behind why he's looking forward to going back to Vaylin (not so much since the Edward announcement but 😬.) I think he thinks that if he just does what they want for long enough, or at least stays out of their way, they'll care about him. If he fulfills this imaginary role he thinks he's supposed to, they'd love him. Of course, we know this to be untrue--just look at Edward--but one of Tobias' main motivations throughout this series has been shown to be the desire to be loved. And when all he's ever been taught is that usefulness = love, of course he's going to gauge everything by that.

Speaking of this panel specifically, this is actually kind of news to me, considering I've suspected for a long time that Tobias purposely failed out. Turns out that's not the case. He is genuinely, seriously, horribly bad at being a soldier.

Which brings me into my next point.

Fenn being forced to consider a new type of worth.

Throughout this series, Fenn has shown several times that he values himself entirely (or at least mostly) by how good a soldier he is. To him, that is All That Matters--serving your country and doing it well. Tobias has always acted as if he thought this was dumb, but it's being revealed to us now, that NO--Tobias was ALSO brainwashed for as long as he's been alive (though in a different way), and he ALSO values himself by how good a soldier he is. He's just a lot better at hiding that fact.

And this isn't a situation where Tobias actually is good at it and is just being hard on himself. He's the real deal. He fucking sucks at being a soldier.

But we also know that Fenn doesn't think Tobias is useless. We know Fenn values him. And Fenn knows that too. So he will be forced to confront this--that maybe being a soldier ISN'T all that matters, and there's more than one way a person can be important and worthy of love. Not only for Tobi, but for himself.

Continuing on the note of Fenn...

This also tells us some new information. What Fenn says about Tobias has a much bigger impact on him than previously thought. Similar to what I was talking about earlier, Tobias has always acted like Fenn's insults don't mean anything to him. But Tobias bringing up what Fenn has said about him in the past tells us something different--they DO hurt him.

I'll admit that I've seen the similarities in how Fenn (particularly early Fenn) sometimes talks to Tobias and how Tobias' family talked to him. But it's never been exactly clear how much this affects Tobias. It seems that he's been internalising at least some of the stuff Fenn says to him.

Now this is a dark take on this whole situation, but. Abuse victims are more likely to end up in abusive relationships because they're used to abusive dynamics, and may even see normal/healthy relationships as uncomfortable. I am NOT saying Fenn is abusive--he has his own reasons for acting the way he did, many of which are completely understandable from his perspective, though misguided. I AM saying that Tobias has acted uneasy and/or confused in the past when Fenn has acted in a way that contradicted his family's abuse (telling him his art is great, that his ideas are worth listening to, etc.)

This is part of why I think Fenn and Tobias aren't quite ready to be in a romantic relationship yet. There is a certain number of things that Fenn can show Tobias through treating him right, but Tobias shouldn't be dependent on Fenn to know what he deserves and what he's worth. And he should know what sort of treatment isn't okay. He should be able to tell Fenn if something he says hurts him.

Fenn would never hurt Tobias on purpose, but things happen when a person is prone to not speaking out for themselves. Tobias needs to have more character development so they can both have a more healthy relationship in the long run.

...Alright. Moving on.

Minor detail but it was confirmed that Tobias kept his identity a secret because he was afraid of Fenn reacting badly to it. I think most of us suspected that, though.

On a MUCH more positive note, we're about to get into Fenn's reaction!!!

In the past, Fenn has usually only helped Tobias when he's making an excuse for why it's okay, or when he's put their circumstances out of his mind and is refusing to think about them. For example, Fenn cooking for Tobias in the beginning and making the excuse that it's unfair if he's better fed than Tobias, or Fenn pretending that he and Tobias aren't enemies when they were slow dancing together.

But this time, there were no excuses. If he was following the law, he would report him. There was no ignoring their situation or putting it out of his mind. Hell, even Tobias himself threw it right in front of Fenn.

And yet he still chose to help him. I don't know if this development will continue as strongly after this episode--after all, Fenn tends to have a slight development regression after major steps in their relationship--but to me this is showing that he's at least getting closer to not needing some sort of excuse to justify him caring about Tobias. He's getting closer to being able to admit to himself that even if he didn't "have" to interact with him, he would still want to. And he's getting closer to being at a point where he would readily pick Tobias over Sona.

Not only that, but something else was missing as well.

You might've noticed that Fenn sometimes shakes before making a decision that'll bring him closer to Tobi. [Examples below]

I think it signifies internal conflict and struggling with making the decision.

He didn't do it this time, which to me means that this was not a difficult decision to make for him.

And that's not even mentioning the fact that Fenn called Tobias TOBI for the first time!!!

The way this went is quite vastly different from the way the first time Fenn called Tobias "Tobias" went. When that happened, as we remember, it was quite....DRAMATIC. Fenn basically regretted his decision almost immediately and flipped his shit.

But this time around, it was actually a very natural delivery. There was not nearly as much fanfare around it, and so far Fenn is not having the same sort of negative reaction as he did to calling Tobias "Tobias" for the first time. This makes a lot of sense to me, because the two names mark significantly different steps in their relationship.

Calling Tobias "Tobias" was the first proper break into "MAYBEEEEEEEEEEE he isn't the scum of the earth." Fenn reacted very dramatically to it because he had only just accepted that a truce between them was possible and was still deep in Vaylinians-are-inherently-evil-ville. He saw it as himself slipping up and I don't think he even really understood why he chose to do it the first time.

Calling Tobias "Tobi" for the first time, though? Definitely past the "maybe he isn't a bad person" mark. They already have a sort of relationship at this point, unlike the first situation where their "relationship" was basically them just shouting at and insulting each other. Calling Tobias "Tobi" is almost... A term of acceptance to me, if that makes sense? As in, "I'm NOT just doing this because we have a truce, or because I just feel guilty, but because I care about you and you specifically." There is no real excuse for him calling Tobias "Tobi." The only explanation is that he wants to, because he cares about him. It's calmer because it's accepting that. It was deliberate.

They also represent different things. I've talked in the past before about how Fenn says "Vaylinian" when he sees Tobias principally as an enemy, and "Tobias" when he sees Tobias as a real person. I think "Tobi" is not only seeing Tobias as a real person, but as an important person. A good person.

I also think "Tobi" is the signifier that Fenn and Tobias are officially friends now. Before, they always felt like they were this weird in between. Not friends, but not really enemies either. Now I think we've crossed the line into friendship.

And, though I may be wrong about this, I don't think Fenn will be calling Tobias "Vaylinian" at all after this episode. I just don't think Fenn will see Tobias in that way anymore, and now that he knows that Tobias has such low self esteem, I feel he wouldn't want to contribute to it.

Actually, I think this change may be one of the most permanent ones, purely because I don't think Fenn could bring himself to be mean to Tobias again knowing everything that he already thinks of himself. Tobias already thinks that he's useless, that he's a bad soldier, that he's a failure, that he's not someone worthy of love or friendship. Fenn is too good hearted a person to encourage thoughts like that. He can't just change his mind and go all "oh actually I hate you again," he has to think more about how what he does and says actually affects Tobias, and I think he'll become more considerate as a result. I even think Fenn will become more forthcoming about initiating physical contact and other positive interactions. (Speaking of physical contact, this isn't the first time they've hugged, but it's the first time Fenn has hugged Tobias and the first time they've both been an active part of a hug. The other time was kinda just Tobi hugging Fenn and Fenn being too in shock to respond LMAO.)

Overall, I think they're both going to be closer as a result of this interaction. This is the first time Tobias has been truly vulnerable with Fenn, and this is a great sign that the trust in their relationship won't be so one sided anymore (I do believe Fenn has trusted Tobias more than Tobias has trusted him on an emotional level.) Fenn's reaction was VERY important, especially considering Tobi's main reason for not telling Fenn about this was in fear of his reaction. It's proving Tobi's fears wrong and assuring him that it IS safe to tell Fenn about these sorts of things. This is INCREDIBLY important if we want Tobias to get some proper character development. I've always said that I don't think Tobias could get real character development until Fenn got his, and I think this proves that. This is the starting point of Tobias' development arc, and it would've never happened if Fenn hadn't gotten the development he needed to react the way he did. Tobias needs a safe person that he's never really had before, and it's starting to show that Fenn can be that for him, so he can begin to confront his past and realise he deserves better. Fenn's influence especially will probably help him accept the idea that he might not be in the wrong. :)

(I also think the more they both grow away from the people and forces that brainwashed them, the more receptive they'll probably become to the idea of trying to avoid being sent back to their home countries. Escape arc when? 👁)

Thanks for reading!

[frogsinflannel]

ohohoho I need me some more 🦸‍♂️ but also cannot resist resist a random WIP 🎲 and 4

oh hell yeah~

Here’s a superhero snippet:

“Okay, Evan,” Tommy said. He shook his arms out, popped his neck, bounced a little on the balls of his feet.

And Buck. Well, Buck had never been more ready, had never felt as eager as he did right then to get some answers, to finally find out what the hell is going on. “Yeah,” he said. He nodded and squared his shoulders. “I’m ready.”

But nothing happened. Tommy looked him up and down, worrying his lip between his teeth, a thumb tapping curiously at the side of his jaw. “Okay,” he said again, finally. “I think—Well, bridal carry would be the easiest, probably, but I can throw you over my shoulder, piggyback…” He squinted a little, still thoughtful. “I could grab you around the waist but I think the dangling legs might get in the way.”

“Uh… wh-what are you talking about?”

Tommy met his eyes and for an interminable moment they both just stared. Buck swallowed, nervous—but excited, too, the thrum of finally, that anticipation of the explanation he’d waited for his whole life zipping through his veins like a current through a power line.

“Just.” Tommy’s mouth twitched, like he was trying to smile. He never broke eye contact. “Just trust me,” he said, stepping closer. “And hold on tight.” And then he scooped Buck up, effortlessly, one arm under his knees and the other supporting his back. Buck wrapped his arms around Tommy’s neck and clung tight. Tommy took one small step to the side and then bent his knees, sinking down for a moment into a shallow squat.

And then he was launching himself up, springing off the ground with the force of a train. Buck clung tighter, letting out a quick yelp of surprise, as Tommy corkscrewed up, up, up into the air.

~

Aaaand on the random list we got “thanksgiving” which is a cheeky way to describe a series of ficlets in which uh…..well basically Buck gets stuffed

(This is BT set shortly after 7x06)

He wraps one hand around Buck’s waist and leans in to nuzzle at his neck. “I don’t mind at all when it’s the right guy.”

“And am, uh.” He swallows again, trying to force out the words. Tommy’s mouth is busy, pressing gentle, sucking kisses up his throat. “Am I… Am I the right guy?”

“I don’t know, baby, are you asking me to get on my knees for you?”

Buck whines. Tommy laughs, warm and fond, and he pulls back so their eyes meet. Buck blinks, a little dazed, and he’s about to say something–something smooth and clever and sexy, obviously, this isn’t his first blow job–when Tommy squats, grabs him by the thighs and hoists him up. Buck grunts, surprised, but helps arrange himself around Tommy’s waist. “Fuck,” he whispers. He’s got his arms around Tommy’s neck as Tommy walks them the few feet over to the kitchen island. “You’re… you’re strong,” Buck says, because he’s gone horny-stupid and he’s not sure what else to say. His whole body is thrumming and he wants Tommy–he wants him so fucking bad.

Tommy plops his ass down onto the island. “I am strong,” he says, all breathy, his eyes tracing from Buck’s neck down to his waist. “And you’re a big guy.” He licks his lips as his hands find the button to undo Buck’s pants. “You’re the right partner, Evan, I’m dying to get my mouth on you. Make you feel good. Swallow down that huge cock.” He strokes Buck through his pants as he says that, and Buck throws his head back and groans. “But if you want me to get on my knees… I think you need to learn how to ask for what you want, kid.”

“I w-want… Oh fuck, Tommy, please.” He takes in a deep breath and Tommy helpfully undoes his fly and together they shimmy off his jeans. He lifts his hips and Tommy peels off his date night briefs. He waits a moment, hovering over Buck, to see if he’ll speak. But all he can do is gape, helplessly, at the man before him.

~

[n0t-evenhere]

Welp, my dear people. We are on the second to last chapter of the series. “The Star at night.” The finale is going to be soon. Probably this week. I will admit, I did t have an idea of what to draw this time for the story. It’s also a lot shorter this time. I hope you enjoy the read all the same.

⚠️ warning ⚠️ death, gore, bones, knives, unusual death.

“The star at night”

Part 4 “you before me”

Ray pov

How sad, the anguish in the poor face of (you). Ray knew she was going to run, the woman named Carol saw it in her mind. There were many things that he saw in Carol's mind in a few different times he read her mind. He knew Carol would try to sacrifice you to him. Even before she actually went through with it. Carol had been out for herself since he showed up, she planned to leave you and everyone else behind. He almost felt bad for you. Almost.

He dragged you by your arm down the hall, even as you resisted. “Please! Please just let us go! We’ll leave a-and we won’t come back I swear!” You pleaded in his arms. Pleaded for your life and who else remained. Ray sighed, no…you get mercy. None of you deserve it. Not after what you unknowingly started. Was it petty? Sure, but Ray had every right in his mind. Trying to steal Steel sheriffs mask. The man who had tormented him day in and day out for too many years of his liking.

Suddenly he yanked you off your feet, not even your feet roughed the ground. “Let you go?” He inquired. “Promising you won’t come back.” Ray feigned consideration before her look you dead in the face. “No.” Venom dripping in his words. A hate rooted so deep, he wasn’t even sure it dealt entirely with any of the people here. “That’s not good enough. I see you dead.”

(You)

Your heart sank at his words, this was doomed from the start. In that moment, looking into binary Star’s eyes, you saw a deep seated hare. An anger that felt consuming, but it felt different. Wasn’t directly at you or anyone here specifically. It’s a hate that marinated over time, or had been sitting deep down until it erupted without warning. Maybe there was hope? Maybe you could reason with him. You want to reason with him, you didn’t get that chance though before the locker room door opened.

When the door opened, you felt your body suddenly fly through the air before colliding with another body knocking the wind out of you. “AH!” Carol cried out, both you on the floor laughing and heaving in pain. There wasn’t a chance to try and get up before being grabbed by the ankle and dragged back. “No! No!” You try and fruitlessly grab and hold onto anything. Anything that could give you leverage. Nothing. Just nothing to hold on to. “Let’s begin our little chat hm? I think we need a little heart to heart. As I said before.” A pressure on your back kept you in place on the floor. No doubt his foot resting on your mid back. Even with little pressure, your failure and effort to get away was useless; he held fast as if your own strength meant nothing.

Binary Star let out a little chuckle. “No, you aren’t going anywhere. As for our Carol here, I have to make sure she doesn’t go anywhere either.” He hummed, thinking. “How should I ever do that? “Ah, I have it. I know exactly what to do.” Just as Carol got to her feet, she suddenly began to rise into the air for a moment before being slammed against the wall, in the next moment crashed to the floor with a gasp. A nearby locker began to groan as it tipped forward before slamming onto Carol’s knees with a nasty crunch. Carol's screams of agony made you cry out for her. You so desperately wished to save her. Even if she meant to lean you behind. Even if she really didn’t care for you at all…it’s hard giving up a love that you have for so long.

The absolute pain etched into her features made your heart ache deeply. “So, let’s start with a bit of truth, seems fair right?” Binary Star pressed his foot a bit more into your back, emphasizing his words, making you whimper a little. “So, Carol. Let’s start with you, yes? I did a little digging if you will. From the moment (you) mentioned the locker room exit, what was the plan, I mean, your plan?” Binary Star asked, an air of arrogance to his question. Carol shook her head, “I don’t- I don’t know what you are talking about.” Binary Star nodded. “So close.” He smiled. “Wrong.”

The locker rose off of her, Carol's knee caps on full bloody display. Torn flesh, exposed bone. Enough to make anyone gag. That’s not what you were worried about right now though. “Stop! Please Stop! Stop! Don’t-“ you screams on protests went unheard as the locker inched up before slamming down on Carol's hips with another sickening crack, Carol shrieked in agony. Binary star crouched down to you. Grabbing a fist full of hair pulling you head back as far as he could manage, just so he could look at you. “I’m doing this for you. You know. My actions aren’t motivated only by anger. I’m exposing more than one crime here. I want to expose as many things as possible, as they come of course.” Binary Star regarded you before standing up again.

He turned his attention to Carol. “Ah, Carol, I haven’t forgotten you. Promise. Let’s try again, yes? I’ll give you a second chance because I am just that nice. When you learned about the locker room. What was your plan?” Carol looked at you, tear filled eyes and guilt. “There it is. That’s what I’m looking for. Knowing and admitting.” Binary Star said quietly above you. “I- I was going to leave.” Carol confessed, Binary Star gasped audibly. “Leave?” He grabbed you by the hair, taking his foot off of you. Lifting you up. His fingers come up to squeeze your cheeks. “But, how could you do that to someone you love?” He asked with fake shock.

He looked at you, he seemed almost…kindly curious. “How could you be so stupid? Loving someone who doesn’t love you? Not for the right reasons. I’ve seen a lot in my life, more than I’d like to admit. I know when people are just using you. These people,” he shook his head. “There’s no real love for you. Only for what you have.” Carol cried out, “that’s not true! I-I love you (you). I love you like your own daughter!” Binary Star’s face dropped into an annoyed look. His attention turned to Carol. “I’ve been in your mind Carol. The minute you learned about that locker room. All you could think about is escaping and going to the beach. Retirement. Lying isnt a good look for you Carol, so shut the fuck up.”

You lip curled,”Don't talk to her that way.” You hissed at him, the anger prevalent in your tone. He laughed, a laugh from down deep. “Are you any place to be making demands sweetie? I don’t think so, why would you care anyway? Hm? She was just leaving you to die.” Your eyes look to Carol, who is still in pain on the floor. “Because I love her. Even if it’s true. I love her. She’s human, she’s scared.” He looked at you, pity. “You naive little thing. No wonder you were so easily exploited.”

A locker closer to Carol's head began to tremble. “No, no, no! Don’t do this! I’ll do anything please!” You knew where this was going. He didn’t even look at you. “No amount of begging will make her live. The best thing you can do? I accept it. No one’s going home. Not tonight.” The locker leaned forward before it slammed down, a wet crunching sound echoing in the room, blood and brain splattering from under the locker on impact. You could help but gag and throw up at the sight.

Suddenly there was a new sound in the sudden quiet, Binary Star’s grip loosened on you, looking to the right, you see it, a knife stabbed into his triceps brachii. “That’s for my wife you sonofabitch.” Joe…it was Joe! He was alive! Joe took the moment to grab your arm pulling you away from Binary star, he pulled you along out of the locker room. You could help but look back. Binary star didn’t scream pain, in fact it’s as if he felt nothing at all. Didn’t even seem bothered. Removed the knife letting it clatter to the floor. That’s all you saw before he was out of view.

“Joe! Joe, you are alive.” You cried tears of relief. “I thought I lost you. I’m-I’m, we lost everyone. I’m so sorry, I tried to-“ Joe stopped you from continuing, strain on his own voice. “I know. Just- let’s just focus on getting out of here.” The front door was down the hall up ahead. Joe who was ahead of you suddenly fell to the floor with a cry of pain, your hand slipping from his. Causing you to screech to halt. Turning back, the knife he used to stab the hero was now lodged into his calf. “Joe!” You rush to his side, taking him under his arms to drag him. “No, we're almost there! Come on!”

The knife pulled from his leg stabbing him in the back causing him to cry out. You look up, Binary Star making his way to you. No, no, no, no. Not Joe. If you could save just one. Only one. “Stop!” You scream at the hero, anger and helplessness. The knife lifted again, you took a hold of it to try and stop it, but it plunged down again, into Joe’s side. Tears prickling in the corner of your eyes. Joe, even face down, took your hand. The knife is still pinging in and out of his body. “Go, you can’t stay.” feverently you shake your head. “No,” you choke out. Joe gave your hand a squeeze. “I’m not leaving you. I’m not leaving you. I’m not leaving you. I’m not leaving you. I’m not leaving you.” You chant, it’s as if you lost it. You repeat the phrase over and over as if it gives you comfort.

Joe’s POV

(You)…the young one he helped so long ago. Help give a new life to. One where you would be comfortable. Wouldn’t work like a dog. Sure, at first it was all business. As time went on though, he could help but fall in love with you like his daughter. When his own daughter, Carmilla, left, You filled that hole in his chest. Carol was set on Carmilla, and wouldn’t settle for anything else. Not that Joe settled, he just…he loved you like his own. He ignored the pain that radiated through his body.

Joe slid his hand up to your cheek with a wheeze, “It’s the end of the line, (you). You gotta go. Let me go. Run. Don’t look back.” With one look, one glance into your eyes Joe knew. He knew you wouldn’t run. Didn’t want to leave his side. Couldn’t bear the thought of leaving him behind. You had seen so much tonight. He knew that much. He took a deep wheezing breath. “Just close your eyes kiddo.” He said softly. Joe didn’t want you to see him die. He also knew you were next, maybe Binary star would give him the mercy of giving you a painless death. Quick. The world started to go to black. You had your eyes closed as he began to fade. “I…love…you…s-so…much.” Tears pricked his eyes. “Don’t you…for-get it…”

You POV

His words were choppy, dying. His hand slowly slipped from your grip. You didn't have to open your eyes to know he was gone. Everyone was gone. There was only a beat of silence before you let out a wail of emotional agony. All morning you didn’t get the time to do. It all just exploded, here and now in this moment. You grab Joe and pull him close. Cradling his body to you. He was heavy, still warm. .

[crazydestinymilkshake]

Caitlin Clark x Kate Martin Ch 23 PART 1

AHHH we're so lucky we got such an amazing CC game today. Was sad Kate wasn't with her at Carver and inspired me to crank this out.

This is a series of team & CC/KM vignettes from Caitlin's sophomore Fall, ranging from ~ September - Halloween when the season picks back up on Nov 1.

Wanted this to be lighter so more head canons of team at college, scavenger hunts, doing dumb college shit together and bonding. I consider the other half of this chapter really one with this, but apparently i write too much bc i had too many character's for one post and I wanted to split it up at an appropriate time. So Halloween half will come tomorrow :) worth the waiit! (Read chaps seven & eight halloween freshman year here for more context).

NSFW: WLW, Smut, Edibles/drug use, plot. All revious chapters below.

Disclaimer: This is my first time writing a fic! Any feedback is welcome. Friends -> lovers, Caitlin's gay-awakening. I obviously don't own any of the rights to these characters etc.

Kate walked across campus with her hands deep in her hoodie pocket and heat still sitting low in her spine. Not adrenaline. Not nerves. Just… something solid.

She was sore. Not the bad kind. The kind that reminded her what she’d given Caitlin earlier that day. Caitlin had pulled her in, sharpened her, kissed her slowly, and said you’re back like it was already true. Maybe it was.

Now, Kate moved with purpose. Sunglasses on. Hood up. Headphones in—Drake playing low. Just enough to keep her thoughts quiet.

Caitlin was probably still on the couch. Loose-limbed. Glowing. Sore in a way Kate didn’t let herself think about too long.

There was film. Strategy. Leadership meetings.

If they were going to be great—actually great—it wasn’t going to be by accident. Not because Caitlin had to hero 40 minutes a game. Not on hype. Not luck.

It would be because they built something tight. Disciplined. Real.

She hadn’t said it out loud. Not to Caitlin. Not to anyone.

But the thought stuck to her ribs: What if she leaves?

She hadn’t meant it the first time. But now it showed up too easily. Her parents were back. NIL conversations were taking over for every athlete, not justin Caitlin. Nothing next year was guaranteed.

So Kate left a note. Sharp. No frills. YOU’RE EVERYTHING. DON’T FORGET.

By the time she stepped into the film room, her jaw was set. Her body was calm.

Monika twirled a pen like she meant to use it. McKenna leaned back like the chair was hers. Coach Bluder had her coffee and her calm. Jan stood by the wall, arms crossed. Watching.

Kate nodded once. Sat down. Crossed one leg over the other. Back straight. Hands still.

She didn’t speak. She didn’t need to—not yet. The room smelled like dry-erase markers and disinfectant. A whiteboard hung behind them, still haunted by last week’s notes.

Coach Bluder broke the silence. “Alright. Let’s talk about goals.”

McKenna raised her hand. “No losing.”

“Great,” Bluder deadpanned.

Monika shrugged. “Win the Big Ten. Make the elite Eight minimum.”

Kate didn’t say anything.

Jan tilted her head. “Katie?” Kate looked down once, then back up. Her voice was even, clipped. But the edge was there if you listened.

“We have a shot. A real one.”

Bluder nodded. “We do.”

“But only if we stop waiting to get serious. Not in January. Not when we’re 4–0 and feeling good.”

“We will be 4–0,” McKenna said.

Kate didn’t flinch. “Not the point.”

Monika raised a brow. “You think we’re not locked in?”

“Caitlin wants a championship,” she says. “Not just for herself. For all of us. But she’s not going to wait around forever for it.” Kate sighed. “I think we’re not aligned,” Kate said. “We train hard. We know plays. But we don’t know each other. Not the way we need to. Not for March.” She leaned forward, elbows to knees. “I’ve been on teams with talent. I’ve been on teams with chemistry. This year has to be both. This year has to be everything.”

She didn’t say: We have the most-watched player in the country, and she might not stay if we blow it. Didn’t say: She finally believes in this place again. I can’t be the reason she stops.

But Jan heard it anyway. Her eyes narrowed. Not harsh—just sure.

Bluder looked at Kate. “So what’s your pitch?”

Kate sat up straighter. “Structured team bonding. Captains running extra lifts. Accountability pods. Small group check-ins. And we lead it—top down. No exceptions.”

Jan raised an eyebrow. “You want a culture reset.”

Kate nodded once. “I want to do whatever it takes to win with the people I love.”

Silence.

Then McKenna, leaning forward. “I’m in.”

Monika smirked. “Tell me where to be, Captain.”

Jan didn’t say anything. Just watched her niece, quiet.

Later, when the others filed out, Jan stayed back.

“You’re doing good,” she said.

Kate shrugged. “Just trying to lead.”

Jan gave her a long look. Then: “You’re scared she’ll leave.”

Kate exhaled through her nose. “She loves it here.”

“But you think if it stops being enough—if it gets too hard—she’ll go.”

Kate didn’t answer.

Jan stepped forward. Rested a hand on her shoulder.

“Then make it more than enough,” she said. “Don’t chase her. Lead like she already chose you.”

Kate nodded once, slow. Breath tight in her chest.

Later that night, she opened the team group chat.

KATE: 7:30am lifts start tomorrow. I’ll bring the aux. Don’t make me regret it. GABBY: So can I DJ? KATE: define “DJ” SYDNEY: does this mean i have to wake up before 9am? MCKENNA: lfg everyone's coming. yes sydney i'll pour ice water on your head tomorrow at 7.

Kate didn’t respond.

She just dropped her phone on her nightstand, pulled her hoodie over her head, and set her alarm.

—-----------------------

The weeks slipped by fast and loud. Not soft. Not easy. But good.

7:30 lifts turned into law. Kate never made a speech about it. She didn’t have to. She just showed up, every day, already warm, aux plugged in, waiting. 

The team followed.

Sydney brought complaints. McKenna brought spreadsheets and chaos.

They weren’t perfect, but they were building something.

The mornings bled into workouts. The workouts into practices. Bodies sore. Voices hoarse. Monika ran point on pod check-ins. Nobody said it, but it was starting to feel real.

Caitlin didn’t say much. She didn’t have to. But she watched.

Watched Sydney show up on time, even when she was dragging. Watched AJ stay late to rebound. Watched Gabby bark orders and do extra sets. They weren’t trying to impress her. They were trying to belong.

And that meant something.

She hadn’t asked for any of it—hadn’t expected them to care this much. But every time someone dived for a loose ball, stayed to stretch, checked in without being told... She felt it. That tug in her chest. The one that used to only happen during fourth quarters and film sessions.

Maybe she wasn’t the only one who wanted this. Maybe she wasn’t alone in it anymore.

And that scared the shit out of her. But it also made her want to play harder.

For them. With them.

She didn’t say any of it. Just nodded when Monika handed her the practice notes, and said, “We’re getting there.”

--------

And then came the Camp Games.

Gabby claimed it was “team bonding.” McKenna called it “chaos with cones.” Monika just muttered, “This better not involve glitter.”

No one knew who actually planned it. They all just showed up on the rec field at 4:00 PM sharp—water bottles, cleats, Gabby with a whistle she definitely stole from the training room.

Gabby shouted, arms wide like she was announcing a revolution. “Today we test your strength. Your stamina. Your soul.”

“You’re not God,” Sydney muttered.

Gabby clapped her hands like a camp counselor on espresso. “Alright! Team One: Caitlin, McKenna, Monika, and AJ.”

Caitlin fist-pumped. “Let’s go.”

“Team Two: Kate, Gabby, Sydney, and Jada.”

Kate raised a brow. “Seriously?”

Gabby grinned. “Random draw.”

“You are the random draw,” Kate said.

“And I’m here to cause balance,” Gabby replied, deadly serious. “Also? To beat Caitlin Clark into the dirt.”

“You wish,” Caitlin called from across the field, arms crossed.

Kate met her eyes across the grass. “Try me, superstar.”

“Don’t tempt me,” Caitlin shot back, already tying her laces tighter.

The first event was dizzy bat relays. McKenna spun so hard she careened into a cone. AJ ran backwards on accident. Somehow, Caitlin still carried them to a photo-finish win.

From the other side of the field, Kate pointed at her. “I’m still not scared.”

“Give it a minute,” Caitlin said, jogging past her.

Next: tug-of-war. Gabby wrapped the jump rope around her forearms like she was entering the octagon. Kate stood anchor, feet dug in, biceps flexing.

Caitlin stared from across the rope.

“I’m not afraid of you,” Kate said under her breath.

“You should be,” Caitlin said. “I’m competitive and petty.”

“You’re also small.”

“Fast,” Caitlin corrected.

“Still gonna lose.”

“Over my dead body.”

Gabby blew the whistle.

They pulled.

AJ screamed. Sydney cursed. Gabby cackled.

Caitlin dug in, legs burning, teeth gritted.

Kate grunted and gave one last heave—and Team Two won.

Caitlin dropped the rope and stared at her, breathing hard. “Enjoy it. It’s your last one.”

Kate smirked. “We’ll see.”

Third event: human knot.

Gabby shoved her team into the mess like it was dodgeball tryouts. “We’re flexible and emotionally intelligent,” she yelled.

“Speak for yourself,” Sydney muttered.

McKenna attempted yoga. Jada nearly punched Gabby in the face. Monika gave directions in three languages. Caitlin, in the center of it all, shouted, “Can we get organized for five seconds?!”

“You sound like my therapist,” AJ said.

Kate’s team finished first. Barely.

Gabby did a cartwheel to celebrate.

Final event: the gauntlet. Cones. Leapfrogging. Dizzy spins. One mini hoop zip-tied to a trash can.

Caitlin cracked her knuckles. “This is mine.”

Kate leaned in, close enough to catch her eye. “You sure?”

“I was born for this,” Caitlin said.

“Then show me.”

Gabby blew the whistle.

Caitlin flew. Over cones, around bodies, through chaos.

Kate watched from the sidelines, heart hammering. She knew that posture. That fire. The way Caitlin didn’t hold back, didn’t slow down, even when it was supposed to be a joke.

She spun. Shot.

Swish.

First make all day.

She threw both hands in the air and shouted, “LET’S GOOOO!”

McKenna tackled her. AJ high-fived her. Monika yelled, “MVP of pettiness!”

Kate walked over slowly, clapping once.

“That was hot,” she said.

Caitlin raised a brow. “That was victory.”

Kate tilted her head. “Pretty sure it was a tie.”

“We won by vibes.”

“Debatable.”

“Eat grass.”

“You wish.”

They stood there, flushed and smug and way too happy for two people who just spent an hour pretending this was all just fun.

Later, in the dining hall, Caitlin collapsed next to AJ with two grilled cheeses and a gallon of Gatorade. Her face was red. Her voice was hoarse.

She still couldn’t stop smiling.

McKenna was telling someone about her “elite leapfrog form.” Sydney swore she saw God mid-spin. Gabby recapped the day in third person.

Later that night, the hallway buzz had died down. Group chats slowed. The only sound in the common room was the muted hum of a fridge and the occasional clink of ice in someone’s water bottle down the hall.

Kate was already there—hoodie half-zipped, knees pulled to her chest on the couch, remote in one hand, half-watching a muted episode of Shark Tank. Her hair was damp. Her body looked like it had finally remembered how to rest.

Caitlin dropped onto the other end of the couch, stretched her legs out. They didn’t speak for a minute.

Caitlin stretched out her legs with a quiet groan. “My legs are destroyed.”

Kate smirked. “You did try to out-sprint the laws of physics.”

“I won two events.”

“You nearly face-planted into a garbage can.”

Caitlin grinned. “Still counts.”

They sat for a beat. The light from the TV flickered across the walls.

Then Caitlin said, softer, “You felt really... present today.”

Kate blinked. “What do you mean?”

“I don’t know.” Caitlin shrugged. “You just seemed locked in. With the team. With all of it.”

Kate nodded slowly. “Trying to be.”

Caitlin looked at her. “It matters.”

Kate raised a brow. “To who?”

“To me,” Caitlin said. “To all of us. When you lead like that—when you’re really in it—it changes the whole room.”

Kate let that settle. Then, gently: “Why does winning matter so much to you?”

Caitlin frowned. “What do you mean?”

Kate turned toward her slightly, knees almost touching. “Winning. Pushing. Needing to be the best at everything. Even in a dumb relay race with Gabby screaming about glory. You don’t ease off—not ever.”

Caitlin opened her mouth, then closed it again. Her fingers found the frayed edge of her hoodie sleeve.

“It’s not about proving something,” she said. “Not really. It’s about… what happens when I’m in it.”

Kate tilted her head. Said nothing.

Caitlin exhaled. “When I’m locked in—when the ball leaves my hand and I know it’s good before it even hits the net—something clicks. Like the world slows down. Like I’m outside of it, but also exactly where I’m supposed to be.”

Her eyes stayed on her lap, but her voice steadied.

“I can remember every step of a play. Where everyone was standing. The angle of their feet. The arc of the pass. I can feel it—like it’s still happening. I play it back in my head like a movie. Like... I don’t know. Like instant replay, but in my brain.”

Kate raised an eyebrow. “Yeah?”

Caitlin nodded. “You remember Indiana last season? Senior night. Tie game. 63–63. Twelve seconds on the clock.”

Kate blinked. “That fadeaway?”

“You had #14 on you—Daniels. Six-one and twitchy. She overcommitted on the screen and you split it anyway. You faked the drive, pulled back baseline. Two dribbles. You planted your left foot just inside the hash and rose. That little kick you do with your right leg when you shoot off-balance?” Everyone thought you were gonna pass out to McKenna, but I knew. You had that twitch in your shoulder you get before you spin. I watched their forward bite early, and you—God, you were already in the air.”

Kate let out a breath. “Jesus.”

Caitlin wasn’t done. “The arc was clean. Ball left your hand with 1.2 seconds left. I watched their 5—#44—start to crash the boards before the buzzer even sounded. And I knew. Before it even dropped, I knew.”

Caitlin kept going. “And I can still see it. The arc. The release. The way your wrist snapped. The girl under the basket flinched before it went in, because she knew too.”

Kate swallowed.

“And it’s not just your shots,” Caitlin added. “I remember my own too. Sophomore year of high school, state semis. We were down by two. I got the inbound with six seconds. Drove right, crossed left at the elbow. Their guard trailed. I pulled up from thirty. My right foot landed just behind the volleyball line. There was 0.3 left when it went through.”

Kate let out a low whistle.

“I didn’t even watch it fall,” Caitlin murmured. “I just knew. The net sounded right. My balance was perfect. It felt… holy. Like something outside myself was moving through me.”

She looked up at Kate, eyes soft but electric. “That’s why I push so hard. That’s why I care. Not to prove something. But because those moments? That feeling? The divine one? It doesn't just happen. I have to earn it.”

Kate didn’t speak for a long beat. She just stared at her, her throat working.

Then she reached over and took Caitlin’s hand.

“You,” she said, voice low, “are not normal.”

“I think it’s my gift,” Caitlin said. “And I don’t mean that in a cocky way. I mean it like—I was built for this. Like God or the universe or whatever just handed me this thing and said, go be a superhero. And if I don’t live up to it, if I don’t try to be the best every second, I’m wasting it.”

She finally looked up, and her voice dropped lower. “Sometimes when I’m on the court, I feel like I could do anything. I feel... holy. Like I was meant to be here, doing this. Like nothing can touch me.”

Kate didn’t speak right away. Her throat was tight. She reached over, slow and certain, and rested her hand on Caitlin’s knee. “I’ve never heard you talk about it like that,” she said quietly.

Caitlin shrugged. “I don’t. Most people just think I’m competitive and crazy.”

Kate’s thumb moved in a slow arc. “You are. But not in the way they think.”

Their eyes locked. Something settled between them. “I love that about you,” Kate said.

Caitlin swallowed. “What?”

“That you know what you were made for,” Kate said. “That you chase it without apology. It’s not just intensity. It’s... devotion.”

Caitlin’s eyes shone, just a little.

Kate leaned closer. “And if you’re a superhero,” she whispered, “then I get to be the one who keeps you human.”

Caitlin’s breath caught.

Kate’s voice was low. “You think we won't see you anymore? If you lose?”

Caitlin swallowed. “I don’t know. I think I’m scared to find out.”

They sat with that. The only sound was the soft shift of fabric as Caitlin leaned her head back against the couch.

Kate reached out and ran a hand along Caitlin’s shin, light and steady. “I think you're a super hero whennot scoring forty.”

Caitlin looked over.

“I think you're meant to be where you are when you’re laughing" Kate said. “When you’re trash-talking McKenna. When you’re tying your shoes too tight before practice and muttering about rebounding drills.”

Caitlin gave a small laugh.

Kate’s voice dropped. “I saw you today. Not just because you were winning. Because you were with people. Letting them see you back.”

Caitlin didn’t answer. Not out loud.

But she leaned in.

Their knees bumped.

Kate nudged her gently. “I want to win too, you know.”

“I know.”

“Not just for the title.”

Kate looked down at their legs, pressed side by side.

“For us,” she said quietly.

Caitlin nodded. “Okay,” she whispered. “Then let’s.”

Kate turned, just a little, enough for her knee to press more fully against Caitlin’s. Her hand lifted — tentative, careful — and brushed a loose strand of hair from Caitlin’s face.

Caitlin didn’t pull away. She leaned into the touch.

Their eyes locked. Steady. Open.

Caitlin tilted her chin up first. “I’ve been waiting for this all day.”

Kate didn’t smile. Not really. She just leaned in and kissed her—slow, deep, reverent. The kind of kiss that spoke fluently in silence. That said, I choose you. Right here. Right now.

Caitlin’s hand slid up the side of Kate’s neck. She kissed back like she meant it. Like she’d been waiting for it all day. All week. Maybe all year.

Kate’s fingers brushed Caitlin’s cheek like they’d done it a thousand times, like it was instinct now. Caitlin turned into the touch, eyes fluttering shut for half a second. When she opened them again, there was no hesitation.

“Come here,” she murmured.

Kate leaned in, slow and sure. Their mouths met—no fireworks, no frenzy. Just warmth. Just weight. The kind of kiss that deepened as it moved, like water finding the shape of something it already knew.

Caitlin’s hand slid up to cup Kate’s neck. Kate tilted her closer, kissed her again. Deeper now. Caitlin exhaled through her nose, breath catching as Kate’s thumb traced the curve of her jaw.

No rush. No fear.

Just this.

Caitlin shifted first, unfolding her legs to straddle Kate’s lap slowly, knees pressing into the couch cushions, one hand bracing on Kate’s shoulder. Her body folded into the space like it had always belonged there. Kate pulled her in tighter, their foreheads pressed together, breath shared.

“Still feel like a superhero?” Kate whispered, voice rough.

They didn’t undress fast. They didn’t need to. Caitlin pulled her sweatshirt off and let it fall behind them, then pushed Kate’s up over her ribs. Skin met skin, slow and warm. The kiss never broke—just shifted, deepened. They moved together like they had time. Like they were learning each other all over again.

Caitlin guided them back, Kate easing her down onto the cushions, fingers drawing quiet paths along Caitlin’s waist, up her spine. She whispered her name like it was sacred.

And when Caitlin whispered back, “Don’t stop,” it wasn’t about sex. It was about being seen.

Later, tangled in each other under a blanket that barely covered their legs, Caitlin lay with her head tucked under Kate’s chin. Their bodies slick with heat, their limbs humming, the window cracked open to let the early fall air in.

“I meant what I said,” Caitlin murmured.

Kate pressed a kiss to her forehead. “I know.”

“You’re not just the one who keeps me human,” Caitlin said. “You make me feel safe in my own skin.”

Kate closed her eyes.

They didn’t speak again. They didn’t have to.

The only sound was the soft rhythm of their breathing, perfectly in sync. Like the pulse of a team. Like the beat of a win already beginning.

—------

Two Fridays later, McKenna blew up the group chat at 6:03 p.m.

MCKENNA: chaos begins at 6:30. MCKENNA: locker room. MCKENNA: wear shoes you can run in or you forfeit your dignity.

Sydney replied with a string of question marks. Gabby replied with a selfie wearing a glitter headband and war paint. Caitlin sent a thumbs up and then threw on a hoodie, already half-laughing.

When they got there, a whiteboard waited with three columns: Teams, Points, and Dares. The markers were already bleeding. Someone had drawn a stick figure puking into a trash can. Beneath it: Last year’s loser.

No one admitted who made the board. Everyone blamed Gabby.

“I’m not saying I organized this,” she said, dramatically holding a clipboard she absolutely brought from her room, “but if we don’t make memories tonight, I will file a grievance.”

Kate raised an eyebrow. “With who?”

“My future therapist,” Gabby said. “Now shut up and team up.”

By 6:15, the locker room smelled like dry shampoo, lip gloss, and adrenaline. Someone was blasting the “Hot Girl Megamix” from a Bluetooth speaker duct-taped to a water jug. Jada rolled in with a glitter fanny pack. Gabby wore war paint (lipstick). AJ brought a notebook labeled “Team 2: Kill List.”

Caitlin stood near the whiteboard, sipping half a Gatorade and watching the rules take shape in real time.

DARES:

Convince a stranger to dance with you (video required)

Find a bathroom with a bidet

Take a selfie with someone named Dave

Steal a frat flag

Do a shot mid-challenge

Kiss a stranger on the cheek

Make a TikTok on a dining hall table

Climb something taller than you

Get a picture inside a moving vehicle you do not own

Bonus: get Professor Lasky to say “ball don’t lie” on camera

And twenty five other random ones.

Teams were chosen Hunger Games style—one captain picking, then the next, no trades allowed. Caitlin landed with Gabby, Sydney, and Jada, Kylie. Kate got Monika, McKenna, and AJ.

Gabby screamed, “LET’S GO YOU ABSOLUTE MENACES,” and immediately shotgunned a White Claw.

“I’m not saying this is rigged,” Gabby announced, “but I feel spiritually aligned with this team.”

“You’re literally carrying a whistle,” Jada said.

“It’s for ambiance.”

Kate didn’t argue. She was already watching Caitlin across the room. Hoodie pushed up to her elbows, hair tied back, smile tugging at the corners of her mouth.

Relaxed.

Kate hadn’t seen that in a while. Not like this. Not without some kind of edge.

McKenna clapped her hands. “You have ninety minutes. Each dare is worth between five and twenty points. I’m the judge. I accept bribes.”

Gabby raised her hand. “What kind of bribes?”

“Surprise me.”

The teams burst out of the locker room like it was a playoff sprint. It felt like a game. Like something no one had to be good at. Just in.

The first dare was get a selfie with a professor.

Monika saw her old psych prof across the lawn. Sydney yelled “DR. HARTMAN, WAIT” while Caitlin speed-walked backward into frame. Ten points.

Caitlin’s group sprinted across campus for “photo in the fountain”. Caitlin ripped off her shoes, splashed in barefoot, dragged Monika in with her, and screamed “JUSTICE FOR MID RANGE JUMPERS” at the top of her lungs.

Somewhere, group of freshman stared. Sydney waved.

Kate’s phone buzzed in her hoodie pocket.

MONIKA: ur girlfriend is unhinged. SYDNEY: send help. CAITLIN: [attached photo: soaked, grinning, standing in the fountain like it was the Olympic podium]

Kate grinned despite herself. “Jesus.”

Gabby elbowed her. “You’re in love with a menace.”

“I am,” Kate said.

She didn’t mean to sound proud. But maybe she was.

Half an hour in, the scoreboard was chaos. Steal a cone had been completed by everyone. Kiss a stranger on the cheek nearly started a fight, until Sydney found a drunk grad student in a cowboy hat who agreed “for democracy.”

Gabby convinced four ROTC boys to harmonize a sea shanty. She conducted them with a baguette.

Across campus, Kate's team scaled the side of the business school loading dock to get a group photo with the hawk statue. Monika sweet-talked a security guard into letting them ride an elevator to the roof. McKenna sprinted to the old gym to reenact her freshman-year concussion fall for “historical accuracy.” AJ filmed the whole thing while eating Cheez-Its out of her hoodie pocket.

Kate’s team earned twenty points by finding a statue and recreating its pose with full dramatic commitment. Caitlin’s group got fifteen for leapfrog down the quad hill. Monika tripped halfway and Caitlin laughed so hard she rolled into the grass and stayed there.

That was where Kate found her.

“Where’s your team?” Kate asked as she passed Caitlin near the library steps.

Caitlin was barefoot, dragging a foam finger and grinning like a problem child. “Gabby stole a golf cart.”

“Jesus.”

“I think Sydney’s kissing someone for points on a scooter.”

“Of course.”

“Are you jealous?”

Kate smirked. “Should I be?”

Caitlin stepped closer. “You tell me.”

Then she took off running—bare feet slapping the pavement, hair flying, laughing in that full-body way Kate had only started to hear again this semester.

Kate shook her head and jogged after her, breath caught somewhere between admiration and disbelief.

By 8:00pm, the quad was alive. The group chats were unhinged.

GABBY: who has the bidet?? AJ: why did you bring glitter SYDNEY: she told the bartender we were in the olympics JADA: technically we are athletes MONIKA: technically i’m tipsy MCKENNA: technically i just got us a selfie with the dean

They reconvened outside a house near campus—McKenna’s new off-campus grad housing place. The lights were on, music thumped, and there was a box of lukewarm pizza on the porch.

Kate leaned against the railing, drinking a spiked seltzer and watching Caitlin hold court by the fire pit. She was flushed, giddy, eyes bright in a way that had nothing to do with alcohol.

Gabby threw an arm around her and shouted, “THIS WOMAN STOLE A FLAG.”

“It was already falling down,” Caitlin said.

“You scaled the porch!”

“I’ve got good balance!”

Gabby declared herself MVP anyway. Monika tried to file an appeal. 

Jada held up a phone. “Proof,” she said, grinning. “For the record. This team carried me.”

Kate walked over, handed her a water, and touched her lower back. “You good?”

Caitlin leaned into the contact. “I think I might be,” she said. Quiet this time. Real.

Kate pressed her fingers into her hand.

Across the lawn, Monika chugged from a Solo cup and declared, “This is culture.”

McKenna yelled, “Postgame breakdown, let’s go!” and gathered everyone in a giant circle on the grass.

They went around, one by one, recapping wins, losses, mistakes, near-arrests, and Sydney’s newfound romantic interest in Max-the-scooter-guy.

When it got to Caitlin, she shrugged. “We didn’t win. But I kind of loved every second.”

Kate nudged her. “Even the foam finger part?”

“Especially the foam finger part.”

The circle turned into a pile. Someone brought out a speaker. Someone else started dancing badly. Someone passed around a bag of marshmallows, half-melted and completely unroastable.

Kate sat behind Caitlin on the grass, arms wrapped gently around her waist. The night had quieted around them—buzz of laughter still humming in the distance, the sky soft and wide above. Caitlin leaned back into her chest, fitting there like she’d always belonged, her breath steady, her body warm.

Her voice came quiet, almost careful.

“I didn’t think I’d have this,” she said. “The stupid dares. The mess. The laughter. I thought it would always just be me. Playing hard. Going home. Keeping it all inside.”

Kate didn’t answer right away. She just let the words settle. Let them stretch out between them and soften.

Then, with steady hands, she laced their fingers together. Her thumbs brushed the backs of Caitlin’s knuckles like a promise.

“You’re not alone anymore,” Kate said, low and certain.

Caitlin nodded, eyes half-closed. “I know,” she whispered. “I just didn’t know how much I needed this. How good it could feel to be… held. And still myself.”

Kate pressed a kiss to the top of her head, lingering there a second longer than she needed to.

And Caitlin leaned in closer, letting the safety wrap all the way around her. Letting herself believe it was hers to keep.

—------------------

Caitlin wasn’t sure who declared it “Academic Reset Sunday,” but McKenna brought whiteboards and color-coded schedules, so nobody dared argue.

They spread out across the library’s quiet second floor—pods of athletes hunched over laptops and notebooks, highlighters scattered like confetti. Sydney tried to quiz Jada on macroeconomics with flashcards shaped like basketballs. Gabby kept shushing everyone, loudly.

Kate had claimed a table in the back corner, far from the stairs, tucked beneath a skylight and a crooked poster about plagiarism. She looked unfairly good in a crewneck and blue-light glasses, legs kicked out in front of her, laptop open but untouched.

Caitlin slid into the chair beside her, a little too close. She didn’t open her laptop.

Kate didn’t look up. “Are you planning on studying?”

“I’m planning on pretending to.”

Kate leaned back in her chair. “So you came here to flirt?”

Caitlin tilted her head. “If I flirt in APA format, does it count as work?”

That earned a quiet laugh. Kate reached out, tugged Caitlin’s chair even closer with her foot. Their knees bumped under the table. Caitlin’s breath caught.

She opened her laptop, finally. But didn’t touch the keyboard. Instead, she pulled out her phone.

Two seconds later, Kate’s screen lit up.

CC: Your legs look illegal in those jeans.

Kate’s eyes flicked over. She didn’t react, at least not visibly. Just typed back.

Kate: Focus on your readings, superstar.

CC: I’m trying. But you keep flexing.

Kate didn’t look away this time. “You’re incorrigible.”

“I’m focused,” Caitlin whispered. “Just on the wrong subject.”

Another buzz.

Kate: You want me to drag you into the stacks and make you earn this A?

Caitlin’s throat went dry.

Her laptop was open to a syllabus. She couldn’t read a single word of it.

Across the room, Gabby giggled at something McKenna was scolding her for. Sydney threw a pencil and missed. But the back corner stayed still. Quiet. Charged.

Caitlin’s fingers hovered over the keyboard, then typed:

CC: Say more.

Kate didn’t reply. She leaned in—just barely—and said, low, “If I do, you’ll fail out.”

Caitlin blinked. Swallowed. Sat very, very still.

They didn’t touch. Not technically.

But their knees stayed pressed together. Their bodies tilted just slightly in. The air between them practically hummed.

A shadow fell across the table.

“Hey—uh, Kate?” a voice said. “Sorry. I heard you took Econ 203 once ?

It was Emily, a freshman with a messy bun and a nervous grip on her syllabus. She clutched a textbook like it might bite her.

Kate blinked, sitting up straighter. “Yeah. You in Barnard’s section?”

Emily nodded. “Her slides are insane. I don’t even know what ‘inelasticity’ means.”

Kate smiled—gentle, warm, professional. The version of her that wore a captain’s band like armor. “Alright. Show me what you’ve got.”

Caitlin stayed quiet. She scrolled meaninglessly through her open doc, every word blurring past. Her body still buzzed with what Kate had texted. What Kate hadn’t said out loud. Her knee kept brushing Kate’s. Her skin was too hot for a library.

Kate talked Emily through a few formulas, sharp but kind, drawing graphs on a post-it note. Caitlin watched her—watched the way she explained things like she wanted them to land. She knew this Kate. The helper. The one who stayed late. Who never asked for credit. Who always carried weight like she was built for it.

And even as her voice stayed steady, Caitlin could see it: Kate’s fingers still tense on the pen. Her foot tapping once, quietly, under the table. Like she hadn’t forgotten what had just passed between them.

When Emily finally left—grateful, still confused, clutching the sticky note like a map—Caitlin turned slowly.

Kate didn’t say anything. Just exhaled once.

“You’re such a good person it’s disgusting,” Caitlin murmured.

Kate arched an eyebrow. “Turned on?”

“Dangerously.”

Kate bit her lip to keep from smiling. “We can’t.”

“I know.”

“But you’re thinking about it anyway.”

Caitlin’s voice dropped. “Every second.”

Kate’s hand drifted under the table, her fingers sliding just above Caitlin’s knee. Not rushed. Not reckless. Just steady—like she knew exactly how close she could get without getting caught.

Caitlin’s breath caught. Her hips shifted the slightest inch toward her. Their thighs touched, warm through denim. Neither looked at the other.

Kate reached under the table, hand sliding up the inside of Caitlin’s thigh—just above the knee, not quite scandalous, but dangerous enough. Her thumb moved in slow circles. Caitlin’s breath hitched.

Kate texted again.

Kate: Meet me in the stacks. Five minutes. Or I’ll lose my mind.

Caitlin didn’t reply. Just stood, slow and smooth, and stretched like she might be going to refill her water bottle. She didn’t look at Kate. Didn’t have to.

Kate followed three minutes later.

They found the far corner of the third-floor stacks—silent, dim, one flickering overhead bulb and a stray copy of a science textbook on the floor. It smelled like dust and paper and something electric.

Caitlin backed against the shelf. Kate didn’t waste time.

Their mouths crashed together in a kiss that had waited hours. Built across texts, glances, touches under tables. It was hot and tense and borderline sacrilegious in a library.

Caitlin’s fingers gripped Kate’s sweatshirt. Kate’s hand found her waist, her hip, her ribs. She pushed Caitlin gently into the shelving like it might keep her grounded.

“I thought we were being subtle,” Caitlin breathed, forehead pressed to Kate’s.

Kate brushed her lips just beneath Caitlin’s ear. “No one’s ever made me forget where I am like you do.”

Caitlin swallowed. “I missed this.”

Kate’s fingers tightened at her waist. “You mean me?”

“I mean all of it. Your hands. Your mouth. That look you get when you’re about to ruin me.”

Kate exhaled, sharp. “Jesus, Clark.”

Their eyes met, close and dark and charged.

Kate’s voice dropped to a rasp. “Say the word and I’ll show you how much I missed you.”

Caitlin’s pulse kicked. “Why are you still talking?”

Kate kissed her—harder this time. Less permission, more promise. A crash and a prayer all at Kate’s hand slid up the back of Caitlin’s neck, fingers threading into her hair. Caitlin leaned into it, mouth parting slightly, heart thudding too loud in the quiet.

They stayed like that—lips grazing, breath shared, bodies barely touching but everything between them wide open.

For one suspended second, nothing else existed.

Kate’s fingers curled into Caitlin’s waistband. Caitlin’s breath hitched. She was seconds from undoing something.

Then—

Someone cleared their throat.

Deliberate. Loud. A cough, and a voice: “Oh my GOD.”

They turned. Frozen.

Gabby stood five feet away holding a spiral notebook and a Diet Coke. She blinked at them, deadpan.

“Well,” she said. “If it isn’t the Lesbian Shadow Society.”

Kate’s hand dropped like it had been caught in the cookie jar. Caitlin stepped back so fast a copy of Intro to Psych hit the floor.

“Didn’t realize ‘study break’ meant second base.” Gabby took a sip from her water bottle. “Don’t stop on my account.”

Caitlin covered her face. “Oh my God.”

“I came looking for the sociology section,” Gabby said brightly, “and instead walked in on The L Word: Special Collections Edition.”

Kate covered her face with both hands. “Please leave.”

Gabby grinned. “This will live rent-free in my brain forever.”

“Don’t tell McKenna,” Caitlin begged.

“Fine,” Gabby said. “I’ll keep it classy.” She started to walk away, then paused dramatically. “But next time you defile a nonfiction aisle, maybe don’t do it in the dolphins and sea animals section.”

She winked, sauntered off, and added over her shoulder: “Also—ten outta ten form. Proud of you both.”

Kate groaned. “You’re not going to shut up about this, are you.”

“Absolutely not,” Gabby said. “I’m gonna tell McKenna you were doing…research.”

“Don’t,” Caitlin begged.

Caitlin leaned her head back against the shelf. “I hate her.”

Kate laughed, forehead pressed to hers. “You love her.”

“I love you,” Caitlin said—too fast, too full, like it slipped past her guard.

Kate froze for half a breath.

“Good, I love you too.” she said, and kissed her again. Soft. Certain.

—-

The week after the library, everything felt a little lighter.

Caitlin didn’t flinch when Gabby raised an eyebrow. She didn’t duck out of team meals early or sit three chairs away from Kate just to be safe. She let herself be seen—still cautious, still private, but no longer pretending she didn’t care. The team noticed, of course. They didn’t say anything. Not directly. But Caitlin caught the way AJ smiled at her differently now. The way McKenna threw a wink Kate’s direction when Caitlin walked into the gym.

And when Gabby announced, “Team bonding. My kitchen. No questions,” no one said no.

They were walking back from practice when Kate asked, “You gonna come Thursday?”

Caitlin raised an eyebrow. “To Gabby’s stoner bake-off?”

Kate laughed. “It’s team bonding.”

“It’s a felony.”

Kate bumped their shoulders lightly. “You don’t have to get high.”

Caitlin didn’t answer right away. Her gaze stayed forward, tracking the familiar cracks in the sidewalk. “I don’t know,” she said eventually. “I’ve only ever done it once. And it wasn’t... here. It wasn’t part of this.”

Kate glanced over. “You’re worried about control?”

“I’m worried about a million things,” Caitlin said. “Testing. Judgment. Cameras. The fact that my body is basically government property.”

Kate nodded. “Valid.”

They kept walking. A squirrel darted across the path and Caitlin flinched, then rolled her eyes at herself. “Also,” she added, quieter, “I’m not great at relaxing around other people. Even when I want to be.”

Kate’s hand brushed hers once. Just once. “It won’t be pressure,” she said. “Just people who love you. And brownies that might kill us.”

That drew a smile. Caitlin looked down. “You’ll be there? With me? Through however it goes?”

Kate gave her a look. “Try keeping me away.”

Caitlin took a breath. “Okay.”

“Yeah?”

“If you’re there, and if no one expects anything from me... I want to try.”

Kate’s grin was soft. “It’s not a big deal, you know. But it’s also kind of a big deal.”

“I know,” Caitlin said. “That’s why I’m showing up.”

Gabby insisted she had the recipe from her older cousin. McKenna insisted she could “absolutely eyeball the dosage.” Sydney just brought a six-pack of Gatorade and said, “Whatever happens, I’m hydrating through it.” Jada and Kylie made everyone promise there'd be no phones, no recordings, no videos.

The team crowded into the kitchen like it was a challenge show. Someone turned on a chaotic playlist. Someone else lit the oven and forgot why. Kate stood at the counter pretending to supervise, arms crossed, trying not to laugh as Gabby stirred the brownie batter like it owed her money.

When the brownies came out, nobody waited for them to cool. Kylie burned her tongue. Monika claimed it tasted “a little herbal.” McKenna declared them perfect and immediately forgot where she put her phone.

Forty minutes later, Planet Earth was in full blast and chaos had taken root.

The carpet scratched lightly against Caitlin’s cheek as she let herself melt into it, limbs slack, laughter still buzzing faint in her throat. Around her, the apartment had descended into stoned chaos—Gabby narrating the penguin mating rituals like a Discovery Channel host possessed, Sydney whispering to a lava lamp, Monika and Jada deep in an argument about whether soup was a beverage.

McKenna sat on the arm of the couch, holding a tortilla like a microphone. “I just think,” she said solemnly, “that no one is ready for my mixtape.”

“You don’t rap,” Kate said from the floor, deadpan.

McKenna flipped her hair. “Yet.”

Gabby crawled over and poked Caitlin’s foot. “Do you think penguins are gay? Like statistically?”

Caitlin giggled. “What?”

“I’m just saying,” Gabby waved at the TV, where two penguins waddled in unison. “If they are, I support them. Like I support you and Kate. I would go to your wedding.”

Kate choked on her water. Caitlin buried her face in the carpet.

“You’re so high,” McKenna muttered.

“So are you!” Gabby shot back. “I saw you try to put peanut butter on a candle.”

McKenna paused. “And yet, it still tasted better than your brownies.”

Laughter echoed around the room. Kate’s head dropped back against the couch, grinning. Caitlin let her eyes drift shut, chest warm. The kind of warmth that came not just from the weed, but from being here. From being known.

The chaos simmered. Not gone, just lower—like someone had turned the volume knob halfway down.

Monika curled deeper into a pile of blankets. Gabby lay flat on the carpet now, blinking slowly at the ceiling. Someone sighed. Someone else shuffled to the kitchen for more Gatorade. For a second, it was quiet. Not awkward. Just open.

Kate was brushing chip crumbs off Caitlin’s sweatshirt when Gabby flopped down beside them like she’d just fallen out of orbit.

“Okay wait,” Gabby said, eyes wide, chin propped on her fist. “Can I say something without it being, like, a whole thing?”

Caitlin narrowed her eyes. “That’s literally never worked for you.”

“I’m being serious.”

Kate sighed. “This should be good.”

Gabby rolled onto her back, arms sprawled, eyes locked on the ceiling like it might explain her own brain to her. “So, like… I think I wanted to kiss a girl once. Maybe twice. But not in a gay way. More in a… ‘I bet she tastes like strawberry ChapStick and unearned confidence’ way.”

Caitlin snorted so hard she choked.

Kate turned to her, mock offended. “Wait—was it me?”

Gabby blinked. “No offense, but no. You scare me. Emotionally.”

Caitlin wheezed, head dropping into Kate’s lap.

“So who was it?” she managed.

Gabby hummed. “This girl from summer league. She wore cut-off sweats and had a lip ring and played pickup in Crocs. I thought that was brave. That’s when I knew.”

“Knew what?” Monika called from the kitchen.

“That I’m, like, at least a little bisexual under certain conditions,” Gabby yelled back.

“I support you!” Monika shouted.

“You should!” Gabby called. “I’m a goddamn pioneer.”

Sydney poked her head out from behind the beanbag. “You thought you were straight until twenty minutes ago.”

Gabby pointed at her solemnly. “And now I am an enigma.”

McKenna raised her Solo cup. “To bisexual chaos and strawberry ChapStick.”

They clinked invisible glasses. Laughter bubbled, bright and hazy.

Then it slowed. Not on purpose. Just the way noise does when everyone starts drifting at once. Someone muted Planet Earth. The jellyfish kept pulsing on the screen, slow and luminous.

AJ, cross-legged in the corner, didn’t look up.

“I kissed my best friend once,” she said. “In eighth grade. We never talked about it.”

The words weren’t loud. They didn’t need to be.

Gabby blinked. “Did you want to?”

AJ shrugged. “I still don’t know.”

A pause.

Caitlin felt Kate shift beside her, a slow exhale brushing against her temple. Their fingers touched, then laced together without ceremony. Caitlin didn’t look over. She didn’t have to. Kate’s presence was steady and close, like a hum beneath the noise. AJ nodded, then lifted her gaze—brief, deliberate—and let it rest on Caitlin and Kate.

Cleaner cadence, same content.

“I just think it’s cool,” she said. “The way you are.”

She didn’t explain what she meant. She didn’t have to.

And Caitlin felt it. That tiny tremor beneath her ribs. That subtle shift of being seen.

Kate didn’t speak. Just let their hands stay locked, her thumb brushing once over Caitlin’s knuckles like a quiet yes.

No one said anything else. Not for a long beat.

They just let it sit there—one more truth, one more weightless permission—in a room that, for once, could hold it.

“You make it feel… normal,” AJ said, eyes flicking away. “I never really saw that before.”

No one laughed. No one made a joke.

Instead, McKenna tipped her imaginary microphone toward AJ. “Bars.”

AJ snorted.

Gabby clutched her chest. “Are we all in love right now?”

“Shut up, Gabby,” Sydney said from behind the beanbag. “The lava lamp is about to climax.”

Laughter again—quieter this time. Softer around the edges.

And Caitlin sat in it, heart buzzing, but not with nerves. With something warmer. Fuller.

She hadn’t done anything. Hadn’t explained herself or made a speech. She’d just been—next to Kate, quiet, unhidden. And somehow, that had been enough to make someone else feel less alone.

She swallowed hard. Let it settle.

There was something sharp and new blooming in her chest. Not fear. Not shame.

Pride.

She looked around the room—her teammates half-buried in blankets and snacks, red-eyed and ridiculous—and felt, impossibly, like she belonged.

And then Kate.

Kate was sprawled just a few feet away, back propped against the couch, one knee bent, eyes soft and hazy. Her laughter had quieted into something gentler now—half a smile, slow breaths, fingers drumming a lazy rhythm against the floor.

At first, Kate didn’t feel much. Just a light fuzz behind her eyes and the way the couch seemed to breathe beneath her.

Then it hit her.

Not like a truck. More like gravity had been adjusted a few notches. Everything was a little slower. A little softer. The colors of the room leaned in. The voices got rounder. Her own body felt… heavy, but not bad. Weighted in a way that made her aware of every place Caitlin touched her—and every place she didn’t.

Planet Earth was still playing. Something was swimming upside down. Gabby was narrating it like Attenborough if he got laid at Coachella. McKenna had a tortilla on her face.

And Caitlin—Caitlin was in her lap.

Well, not quite. On her chest. Curled into her like they’d done this a hundred times. Like it meant nothing and everything. Her cheek was pressed above Kate’s heart. She kept whispering tiny things—you’re warm, this is weirdly nice, I love you the most—like every thought was too important not to share.

Kate’s brain moved like syrup, but her heart? Her heart was sprinting.

She wasn’t a talker high. Not like the others. The weed didn’t make her chatty. It made her aware. Of touch. Of silence. Of every single goddamn nerve in her body that came alive when Caitlin burrowed closer.

Her hand stayed on Caitlin’s hip, circling. Again and again. She didn’t know why. Just… needed to.

The room buzzed around them—light, laughter, someone saying “do fish have knees?”—but none of it stuck. Just Caitlin. The weight of her. The smell of her. The warmth.

Kate felt high, yeah. But more than that, she felt here.

Which was rare. Which was everything.

“Hi,” Caitlin murmured into her sweatshirt.

Kate tilted her chin down. “Hi.”

Caitlin exhaled a soft, wobbly breath. “This is… weirdly nice.”

Kate hummed, her fingers tracing circles on Caitlin’s hip. “You mean the part where everyone’s high out of their minds and Sydney just apologized to the blender?”

“No,” Caitlin said, a sleepy smile tugging at her mouth. “The part where I don’t feel like I have to be anything.”

Kate’s grip tightened. “You never do. Not with me.”

Caitlin didn’t answer right away. Her heart fluttered low in her ribs. She felt everything too much—Kate’s voice in her chest, the gentle warmth of her palm, the way her own body relaxed like it had been waiting for this, for the freedom to just exist.

And this time, when she whispered it, it wasn’t from fear. Or ache. Or need.

It was from joy.

“I love you.”

“Oh.” Kate’s hand stilled. Then she laughed too, the sound bubbling up out of her like relief. “Sure you do.”

“I mean it.” Caitlin nuzzled closer. “I love you the most.”

Kate said nothing at first. Just bent down and kissed the top of her head, slow and reverent. Then: “You’re high.”

“You’re warm,” Caitlin countered.

They stayed like that, tucked into each other on the living room floor, while chaos swirled around them and the city pulsed quietly outside. For once, Caitlin didn’t care how she looked. She didn’t care who saw. She just let herself be held.

The edible had softened her edges. Words melted off her tongue easier than usual, and for once, her brain didn’t shout over every moment. Just let it land. Let it be. Caitlin felt her breath match Kate’s—slow, steady, as if the rhythm between them had always existed and she was only just catching up.

AJ stood up to get another brownie and muttered something about how gravity was “suspicious,” which sent Gabby into a fit. McKenna tried to reenact slow motion in real time. It didn’t go well.

Kate didn’t move.

Neither did Caitlin.

At some point, Gabby flicked the lights off. Planet Earth kept glowing on the screen, a deep-sea jellyfish blooming in slow motion, every ripple casting blue shadows across the room. Caitlin tipped her chin up to look at Kate.

Later—maybe minutes, maybe hours—Kate shifted. “Hey.”

Caitlin blinked up at her.

“You wanna go to bed?”

Caitlin shook her head. “Already home.”

Kate smiled, tired and full. “Me too.”

They didn’t move again. Not when the screen dimmed to black. Not when Gabby fell asleep mid-sentence, still halfway through narrating the polar bear mating season. Not even when McKenna started snoring with a tortilla across her face.

The room faded into soft breathing and scattered blankets.

Caitlin stirred, just enough to press her lips to Kate’s forehead. She didn’t say it loudly. Didn’t need to.

In a room full of everyone—and no one really awake—she whispered it like a commandment.

“I love you, Kate.”

#wnba#kate martin#caitlin clark#wnba basketball#f/f fanfic#fluff#wnba players#womens basketball#katelin#kate x caitlin#katelinfanwrites#wlw#fanfic#headcanon#smut#wlw smut#uconn wbb#wbb#iowa wbb#iowa hawkeyes#wnba draft#uconn huskies#uconn women’s basketball#paige bueckers#paige x azzi#azzi fudd#paige buckets#iowa women’s basketball#wlw post#wlw nsft

[welcometogrouchland]

Noticing that TV and film will often have a character either have had an abortion in the past that isn't showcased on screen (and just used as part of the character's ~fucked up and twisted backstory~) OR contemplate getting an abortion in the present day but not to through with it. Just once I want to see someone delete that fetus within the events of the plot and not be like. Extremely majorly punished for it and/or be in the wrong

[lucky-slice]

low key i think to deny Riko's trauma is to deny his narrative importance in the story.

like Riko's trauma related to his father parallels neil's. His concept of brotherhood adds complexity to Andrew and Aaron's relationship. He acts not just as an antagonist but as a foil to other character's relationship to trauma and violence.

to solely view riko through the lense of his actions is to miss the point. He is a character in a story, not a real breathing human being.

[twilight-deviant]

But why was the writing so bad?

[nexus-nebulae]

oh my god. that one "oc" we wrote who had DID that we came up with before our syscovery. that was not an oc. oh my god cody and blake why did you take five years to make yourselves known to us-

[bmpmp3]

Getting into stuff that has a lot of pre-announced release dates is really good for me like vocal synthesizer products and new love live etc franchise music releases....I'll be lying in bed at like 2 AM with ur usual 20-something's fear and existentialism over time and the future and then I'll remember a piece of singing software or a new song related to cartoon characters I like is gonna come out like next month and I'm like 😌

[13eyond13]

Time to start reading The Queen of the Damned I GUESS

[12freddofrogs]

Very weird to be in that stage where a show is grabbing hold of your brain, but you haven't finished the show so you cant interact with fandom because spoilers, and you're watching it with someone else so you can't even just keep watching until you finish

[oveliagirlhaditright]

I'm just... I'm so angry at Square Enix right now, for them blaming Final Fantasy XVI for their loss of shares.

I could get into it, but I'm trying not to: I'm trying to breathe and calm down.

But I worry that this might not bode well for Square Enix's future, perhaps, or at least the future of the Final Fantasy series. *bites nails*