#but the cgi was... yikes

[dangerliesbeforeyou]

no disrespect to the guy who played aladdin in the 2019 remake but if i was jasmine and marwan kenzari as jafar proposed to me i'd just marry him, regardless of how 'evil' is was or whatevs

[theres-whump-in-that-nebula]

It’s funny and oddly poetic how Peter Cushing played Victor Frankenstein, a sinister, scientific necromancer; then years after he died, his image was resurrected via a different, equally sinister scientific necromancy.

[asclexe]

hii adam’s dad ^_^

[nodominion]

Mayfair Witches production value felt like a cross between a CW show (random slow popish song during dramatic moments) and the newer Lifetime adaptation of Flowers in the Attic (my guilty pleasure).

[aspenwitch]

He looked like this the whole movie

[shutupineedtothink]

okay a few other notes about ep 5:

OBSESSED with the way that a) Rio was the only one who said the brooms were a good idea and b) she and Agatha INSTANTLY started doing the ritual together, like they’re done this a thousand times before. Amazing choice to show their history yet again without actually saying anything. Show don’t tell baby.

We all love the way Agatha looked at Rio when they were flying, but I also love the moment of pure bliss on her face when she closes her eyes. She loves flying. And she probably hasn’t let herself fly in centuries.

The CGI on the broom flying scene was the exact amount of cheesiness I wanted, A++

Jen has absolutely no patience for Agatha, and I get it, but I have a feeling she’s going to be the first to realize that Agatha is actually telling the truth and forgive her. I’m assuming this will happen whenever the truth is revealed about Nicky.

They all heard the “Stop, mama” not just Agatha. Also confirmed that was a CHILD not a baby, double yikes.

I can’t BELIEVE this episode was basically 30 minutes flat what a RIDE

Okay FINE he’s Billy I’m jumping on the bandwagon now jeez

I didn’t point this out but somebody said Agatha confirmed he was Billy once he said Nicky’s name out loud bc otherwise the sigil would have prevented it and THAT’S SO GENIUS OMG also maybe it was the final nail in the coffin to get her to lash out at him bc she still wanted him to be Nicky

Rio hung back to kick that ghost’s ass you can’t convince me otherwise - “I hate ghosts” yeah I bet you do.

The way she started laughing when the ouija board spelled DEATH I can’t

“Sweetheart you okay?” And “Woah! Where’s she goin, what’s she doin” are easily top lines of the ep

Catch me psychologically analyzing this shit for DAYS

How am I supposed to sleep now???

[melonteee]

Since you brought up the OPLA den den mushi… I honestly think they’re pretty unimpressive as far as animatronics go. Both in their construction and how they’re used in the show.

Not only are the den dens far less articulate than the animatronics seen in shows of a similar caliber (see: Farscape) but they don’t even achieve the level of articulation of most hand puppets. To me it sums up what sums up how the overall production just seemed to have weird priorities; $10,000 a pop to give these snails realistic skin textures, human lips with moisture glisten, human hair, and off-putting bloodshot eyes only for those elements to be squandered on lifeless mouth flaps.

But they also just don’t work in how they’re framed by the show. In the original series, the Muppet-like simplicity of the den dens’ designs is used to help sell that the mundane whimsy, which combined with how characters treat the den dens makes their relationship with humans feel mutually beneficial. The live action though? If the “kill me” expressions weren’t enough, it’s clear that the directors treated the den dens as set props instead of living animals in the context of the world, and that bleeds into how the characters interact with them. The only characters who use den dens in the whole show are antagonists, Nami’s ear bud den dens sputter and squeal in pain after being submerged in salt water and she throws them back in the water in annoyance when they don’t work, and worst of all Garp flips his desk in a tantrum with his den den still on it where it gets smashed on the floor. Replace the den dens in any of these scenes with a carrier pigeon or a ship cat and the tone suddenly shifts into a huge “fucking YIKES.”

Which to me is a crying shame, because the prospect of seeing Muppet-esque den dens and similar creatures was kinda the only thing that piqued my interest. One Piece is absolutely a series where you should be able to visualize the characters having in-depth conversations with most Jim Hensen creations, but it feels like the show’s budget is already bursting at the seams given how this same issue is prevalent in other areas of the production. I can already tell that the existence of the den den earbuds means they’ll likely phase out the den dens at some point in favor of having characters talk into the middle distance. The Golden Den Den Mushi that triggers the Buster Call to Enies Lobby might end up being a Golden Bluetooth if the series gets that far.

Yeah it feels like the Den Den Mushis were treated so cruelly in the live action, which is just adding to the 'edginess' of the world I guess ??? And it's a shame cause when Sanji crushed the radio in water 7, Oda got someone asking if the Den Den Mushi was okay, and Oda said don't worry! The radio isn't actually the Den Den Mushi, it's just placed on it! So Oda has taken very careful care in his own world to not hurt these little snails, but it feels like the live action just shoved them in not to world build but...like you said, just as props HHH

And yeah the lifeless form of the Den Den Mushi animatronics really aren't that impressive are they, the original Den Den Mushis have little arms that flail around while they openly laugh and scream and cry. Every time a Den Den Mushi got a distress call and acted it out in the manga/anime, I remember thinking "good job little snail." But the live action Den Dens are so...nothing?? They just don't even feel like living creatures lmao

The live action Den Den Mushis feel like a good sideshow attraction where u can let people talk through it for the mouth to flap, but otherwise...why in the world spend 10k (or whatever it was) per Den Den Mushi if you could just make a hand puppet, or even include some CGI, for a LOT cheaper and have MORE movement and expression??? Like you said, the priorities of production were bizarre.

[finalfantasyx]

Thoughts on Dashing Youth - Blood of Youth

I HAVE THOUGHTS AFTER FINISHING BOTH DRAMAS. Spoilers ahead if you haven't seen them.

First things first: I heard of The Blood of Youth when it first came out and have had it on my backburner to-watch list for a long time, but I never got around to it. H O W E V E R, I didn't hear peep about Dashing Youth until it was airing and youtube threw it into my face. Dashing Youth automatically got bumped to the top of my watchlist because I will die before I miss a period/xianxia/wuxia drama starring Neo Hou, just saying.

Ergo, I watched Dashing Youth before I watched The Blood of Youth while thinking, "huh why does every drama have [Shao Nian] in its name nowadays?" only to find out later when I was watching the first few episodes that it was the PREQUEL to The Blood of Youth when my mom walked past and casually asked what this was because the names that were mentioned were in The Blood of Youth (she watched it a while back and recommended it; she's been right on the money so far with good recs--Mysterious Lotus Casebook was also hers and both of these dramas ended up on my top 3 favorite dramas list). A quick google search later told us as much.

That meant I had no context to the world we would be in for the next 80 episodes prior to watching Dashing Youth, and I had no idea who these people were and what would happen to them in The Blood of Youth (which, thank goodness. I would have been in tears the entire time if I watched it the other way around).

To begin--Dashing Youth sucked.

I said what I said; Neo Hou couldn't save this one. The story was bad, the CGI was...not great, and the pacing was THE WORSTTTTTTTTTTTTTT. The *only* thing the producers got right were the characters, because those were A+ spot on. Neo Hou and Xia Zhi Guang and He Yu were SO GREAT in this, and Zhang Chen Xiao was a welcome familiar face after Cang Lan Jue.

Side plug, did y'all know there was a scrapped romance subplot between Dongfang Xunfeng and Dan Yin in Cang Lan Jue??? I am so angry; we could have had all the good things, but no, we're not allowed.

I also absolutely adored the other disciples of Jixia Academy, Baili Dongjun's shixiongs. Lei Mengsha, oh my GOD he was so funny and I laughed every. single. time. he did his gremlin laugh on screen. The others also really grew on me, like...hold on, let me check my notes.../looks at scribbles on hand

The da shixiong who showed up for one arc and like two episodes, after which he was dropped like a sack of potatoes and never seen agani, third shixiong--the sword one with the badass wedding arc in the beginning who we don't care about, the fourth shixiong--Liu Yue, the pretty one, the fifth shixiong--the "ugly" (??? he wasn't???) one who I'm not convinced isn't in some sort of relationship with Liu Yue, the sixth shixiong--the music one whom we know nothing about--OOOH OOOH OOH I KNOW THIS ONE, the seventh shixiong--Prince Langya, Xiao Ruofeng!

Yikes. I wish the show would do these characters more justice, because the actors did GREAT in bringing them to life only to have them nuked because of screentime restrictions and lack of dialogue if they weren't Lei Mengsha, Liu Yue, or Xiao Ruofeng. I literally have the most barebone ideas of who they are. And even Liu Yue got nuked later on. Ugh.

Speaking of characters, I really loved Yue Yao and her drive to do what was right as the story progressed. She was so interesting when she decided to take charge of things instead of letting them happen to her, and then LOOK WHAT THE PRODUCERS DID WITH HER. Sidelined her and made her arm candy to Baili Dongjun when they could have been a badass fighting couple. A N D based on the timeline we got in the drama, they were together for like seven years and you're telling me they didn't get married until post-drama??? I don't believe you~

I literally powered through this drama, though credit must be given for the soundtrack, which I thought was overall better than The Blood of Youth's (save for a few songs, but I would sooner listen to the full OST for Dashing Youth without skipping songs than The Blood of Youth).

There was a lot of story and a lot of characters to cram into this drama so that it would set up for The Blood of Youth properly, which was by then a very established drama. Retconning is a nightmare, but the producers and screenwriters somehow MADE A PREQUEL WORSE because there were a lot of details and characters that dragged on for too long, took up too much screentime for NO purpose whatsoever (like Baili Dongjun learning the sword and dao technique that he maybe used like once?), and then caused the rest of the actually important details that need to set up The Blood of Youth to be SUPER rushed.

The pacing. Dear GOD, the pacing. If your drama requires multiple voice-over timeskip cuts, you're doing it WRONG (see: shoving in the Four Guardians of Tianqi without actually letting us see this badass team interact even once...nuking the seven disciples of Jixia Academy while then bringing back Liu Yue and Mo Xiao Hei at the end to fight Nanjue with Lei Mengsha ALSO without actually letting us see them together and then saying that they went back to jianghu after the battle without mentioning how Lei Mengsha died while fighting Nanjue in The Blood of Youth...how on earth Li Hanyi became the second City Master when Sikong Changfeng was explicitly namedropped by Luo Shui, the previous City Master of Xueyue...I could keep going).

This is bad writing at its finest and I am angry that the drama turned out this way when source material was actually so good.

--Then, The Blood of Youth.

This drama was everything Dashing Youth wanted and tried to be, but even with a template in front of them, they still managed to get it wrong. The audacity and freedom and shackles of youth, the adventure and the beginnings of romance, the court politics and the complexity of jianghu--The Blood of Youth did it RIGHT, and with excellent pacing and development.

[yeahiwasintheshit]

i watched poor things, and it was good. i cant say i loved it or hated it. it was very showy and kinda "look at me", in terms of direction and use of camera work and different lenses... and there were color scenes and black and white scenes, it was… alot. but it also kinda worked... mostly. the production design was also wild and fun to watch. visually interesting. tho the cgi, esp of the ship was like 1990s level of bad. like dont give me that it was supposed to look like that cause of the style or whatever... it look like absolute dogshit. emma stone was really good, her performance really made the picture. mark ruffalo and willem dafoe were also great. i wont spoil any plot points, but in the beginning it was looking like her performance might be like a rosie odonnell or jodie foster or leonardo dicaprio level of yikes, but in keeping with the plot, it... progressed beyond that. it was sort of this twisting plotline that felt kinda new but also familiar, and was way more sexual than i was expecting. the movie had a sort of emmanuelle or barbarella kinda feel about sexual discovery or exploration, which was kinda fun and a little campy. overall i liked it. i dont see me watching it again, but maybe. it is over 2 hours, and man does that seem like such a long time to commit to something.

[skarsgardsnark]

He could mean about his career. As of now, it seems like he peaked with IT, and everything since then has been kinda meh. He’s gone up for different parts and seems like he didn’t get them, then had to take whatever was left over. It might seem to him like some of his acting peers are doing better than him. He’s type cast in horror, can’t break free. I see the talent in him in his performances, he has the looks, and the height…but it kinda seems like for the past 5 years or so, good roles have alluded him. Hopefully, Nosferatu will help change that.

I love questions like these!

We all know IT launched him into worldwide fame and put him on the map. Let’s take a look at his filmography after 2019. Nine days is a good movie but not many people know about it because it was a small film that made less than a million dollars. TDATT had a lot of hype and even oscar buzz..... until the movie premired. His role was small he probably had 30 minutes of screen time. During 2020 he chose to film Clark over The Northman. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, it was a bad choice and he should’ve done The Northman instead. He had more say in Clark and I know how proud he is of it but I think this is what started a “stall” in his career. Naked Singularity was filmed in 2019 but wasn’t released until 2021 and made 14k at the box office. Eternals, small CGI role that people either don’t know it was him or are barely finding out. Barbarian, a beloved role within the fandom, but once again a small 30 minute role. For as big as he was in 2019 he has now been relegated to play small supporting characters. Burn all my letters, my favorite film of his but it’s a Swedish production so not many people saw it. John Wick, main villain but still a supporting role. He picks up some steam with this one. BKW, his first big leading role in a long time! Unfortunately it had zero dollars for promotion.

“It seems like he peaked with IT, and everything since then has been kinda meh” YES I agree. That’s why I keep saying Nosferatu will be a comeback for him. Imagine if he hadn’t gotten the role and he only had BKW and The Crow this year.... yikes. Talk about a fall off. What he chooses to do after Nosferatu and how he takes advantage of that will be interesting to see.

Yeah I remember him saying he has lost out roles in marvel and star wars. I’ve actually spoken about how other actors like Butler, Powell, Elordi, Keoghan, and Mescal have risen while Bill’s career stalled. In my opinion, he needs to take a break from the dark characters and step away from the horror genre for a minute. He has already solidified his place as a scream king so now he needs to try new things. Maybe a drama or try out for a tv show. It’s crazy how big he was before Covid hit yet his filmography doesn’t really show it.

Thanks for the question!

[reliquiaen]

i've slept on it. here's my alien romulus review

Alien Romulus

Starting with the callbacks and references to other movies, I have to say: I don’t tend to enjoy that, personally. It makes it feel like the movie wasn’t confident in itself enough to be able to stand on its own and the references often come across as a crutch. That said, the only reference in Romulus that felt gratuitous to me was when Andy saved Rain and said “stay away from her, you bitch”, but that moment was cool enough, and I liked Andy enough, that I just enjoyed it. Plus it’s a cool line and David Jonsson’s delivery was perfectly in character so it came off more fun than insecure.

The set design was very visually similar to Alien and Alien: Isolation and the opening scene with the ship coming online was, if not a shot-for-shot recreation, a clear reference to the opening of Alien. This could’ve felt like a bad way to start the movie – being too similar to something else runs the risk of failing to establish its own identity – but frankly, it was so nice to see the same chunky tech tying everything together, and it utilised the atmosphere super well to set up that creeping, slow terror, especially with the combination of close-up shots on the computer screen and the wide, empty shots of space – it perfectly juxtaposed the two scariest parts of the Alien franchise: the claustrophobic interiors where anything can be hiding, and the vast uncaring space outside. A lot of the shots inside the Romulus station were clearly inspired by the game Isolation, too, but not to the movie’s detriment. Isolation was fucking terrifying  and the movie capitalised on that nicely. There was a shot looking down an escalator that launched me back to playing Isolation and the fear of not knowing what was around the corner, or up the hallway, or in the next room and the movie used these hallway shots to the same effect.

Ian Holm’s cameo was fun. The special effects and CGI were not. Obviously they couldn’t get him back (rest in peace), and they wanted to use the same android model for effect, and it worked! But yeah, yikes, the CGI was bad, especially at first. You can say the slippery way his face looked like his skin was sliding around was an artistic choice to show how damaged the android’s body was but I don’t believe that for a second. What I will say is that they used this new android, Rook, really well. His explanation for what happened to the xenomorph they found (and I have no idea how that xenomorph was within the wreckage of the Nostromo when Ripley ejected it from the Narcissus pretty far away from the Nostromo and also after it had self-destructed but whatever) and, importantly, WHY THEY WANTED IT. Oh my god, the vague “they want it for the military uses” is super annoying and that was the only logic we’ve ever gotten about why Weyland-Yutani was so interested in the alien in like forty years. But the set-up and pay-off of this reveal was beautiful. We saw in the opening scenes of the movie that life on other worlds was hard and dangerous and thousands die and people are exploited and it’s horrible. And then giving Weyland-Yutani this “we actually want to help people adapt to harsher environments” as a perfectly noble goal that got twisted by capitalism, but this movie is set like… in the in-between. Before the capitalist dogs ruin the science. This movie is the beat before the fall and that’s… so great. So different.

This reveal did two things very nicely: it tied together the stupid and ridiculous genealogy crap from Prometheus and Covenant (I don’t like those movies and I won’t pretend to) with the other, better movies. If we disregard David’s attempts at playing god (and believe me, I do my best at this every day) then this whole ordeal with the alien was simply that they are highly adaptive due to the black goo (chemical [stupid designation here] – 15) and the company wants to use that to help humanity (be easier to exploit) survive in space. Makes sense! Alien mutations are a nasty by-product, unfortunately, just need to perfect the science.

The main thing that bothered me with this movie was the… white man alien at the end. It was very inspired by the Newborn in Resurrection which I also did not like. (I enjoyed the CONCEPT of the Newborn, but the visuals were just… not great to my mind, not even in the satisfying body horror kind of way, either, just… kind of ugh and meh and wtf did you do to his nose?) This was the same but reversed: a human gives birth to a part-xeno-part-human child and faces the consequences. (And why did Kay even inject herself anyway, she was going into cryo she didn’t need it, she’s just fucking stupid.) Given what happened to the rat in that box, I was expecting (and hoping) Kay would have some sort of horrendous lumpy mutation burst out of her skin and ruin her but leave her alive in this Scorn kind of way (trapped in a fleshy and dysfunctional body, aware but unable to do anything, knowing you did this to yourself and also that you have no way to revert it, perhaps even hurting those close to you and having to watch that happen, helpless to stop it). But no. Birthing an acidic vag-pod was… fun and distressing, obviously, but I didn’t find the slenderman looking white-boy very scary at all. It landed squarely in the uncanny valley, for sure, but idk the design just didn’t do it for me. And I understand the fun part of this: the horror of childbirth (Kay had a lot of that going on, after watching Navarro give birth from her chest and DIE, she was not having a very nice pre-childbirth experience), the visceral rejection she felt, the child eating the mother, that was all very nice, very intense, loved it. (I’m one of those weirdoes who thinks that the predalien turning that lady’s pregnancy into alien: quintuplets was extremely fun and I’ve always wanted to see that expanded upon.) But Kay herself didn’t seem to have any adverse reaction to being injected with the goo, only her baby. I wanted her to have a negative reaction, I wanted Rain to have to face her down, I wanted a little of that ‘Romulus killed his brother to found Rome’ energy here. (And it would’ve tied in nicely with what Rook said about humans having too many emotions and not wanting to believe the best choice is to kill someone. Make Rain face that herself!!)

Otherwise this movie was a fucking masterclass and I enjoyed every second. The visuals, the sound design, the practical effects, the – and I cannot stress this enough – the CAMERWORK. The slow rolls of the camera to mimic the zero gravity? The close-ups on the horribleness so we definitely don’t miss a second of what’s going on? Outstanding. The grungy, drippy, dampness of everything was 10/10, the alien having a vaginal-themed chrysalis (thank you, I’ve waited years for this moment), the cattle prod going into it and coming out melted? Yes, oh my god, yes. The tail spine emerging slowly? And piercing back? OH MY GOD, YES!

The inherent horror of watching your brother become a monster and having to save him from himself? Andy’s part in this movie was so fucking stellar I’m in love with it. David Jonsson absolutely stole the show for me. The symbolism of it all; if you drink from the capitalist wellspring, you become a monster who doesn’t care about anyone, not even those who you counted as family. The moment when he clapped his hand over his ear to stop Rain from removing the chip? How many people have to deal with family members who have drunk the Kool-Aid and won’t hear different? This was that on screen.

And I have to say, this was the best cast of characters an Alien movie has had in… idk a while. They actually felt like distinct people with some personality which was refreshing considering Covenant had a bland bunch of faceless people I couldn’t tell apart and didn’t care about anyway. This movie knocked that one out of the water, it’s really a night-and-day comparison. Even though none of the characters in Romulus had super-fleshed out backstories, they were all going through something and had distinct arcs: Rain and Andy struggling to get off-world and not end up like their parents, Kay’s pregnancy being a secret, Bjorn losing his mum to Android Logic™, Tyler feeling like he has the burden of keeping them all alive and together and failing. Navarro died first, she had the least characterisation, and I don’t mind that, but she at least had on-screen presence and was memorable for what happened. Her last words “don’t let me die” whispered in such a pitiful way because she knows she’s going to die but that’s not really what she’s asking, she doesn’t want to be forgotten. Like. That’s heartbreaking. And she WAS memorable because of it, not just as the pilot or the one who did the cool thing with the xray light.

The zero-grav scene where Rain shot all the xenos in the hallway was extremely fun and novel and NEW, having to navigate through a maze of acid blood wasn’t just a cool visual, it tied nicely into the themes: they were navigating the metaphorical acid maze that Weyland-Yutani left behind. And oh, the continual conflict of going back for someone versus saving yourself? That was good. Bjorn leaving everyone else behind to save Navarro, Tyler watching Kay get alien-napped and then going back for her later, Rain going back for Andy directly into the alien nest. Bravo.  

Overall, I had a blast with this movie, it was really good. Definitely the best Alien movie in a long time. I felt it missed a few opportunities, especially at the end, I appreciate the effect they were going for with the Offspring creature but it felt like a miss to me when they could’ve done something fun with turning Kay into a monster and continuing the thread about humans trying to save each other. Maybe the Offspring will grow on me with a rewatch, like how the Newborn did, but eh. Was a good movie regardless.

[ambrosia-ghostie]

i am so upset.

here are my real-time thoughts from tua series finale, i guess:

- is gun control not a thing in this timeline? jeez

- i don’t even know where i’d get a gun lmao

- this is giving MAGA… yikes

- i love meghan so much. national treasure. AND she can sing. EGOT, please.

- lila isn’t the only one hiding stuff from her husband 👀

- diego talking about lila with a new lease on life 🥺

- awh this is very “it’s a wonderful life”

- lila’s family is fab. the spinoff we need.

- i love how many actors get to perform as other actors performing another role on this show

- the whistle !!! call him out dr. jean !!!

- THAT WAS SO UNNECESSARY

- dr. jean deserved better !!! 😭

- i love the fast food lady (featured extra). she understood the assignment.

- “it smells so nice in here!” why are me and klaus the same person but completely different?

- call back to viktor drawing the umbrella tattoo as a kid !!!

- holy shit, ben is the fly

- body horror is so cool

- oh hey! they’re seeing each other and it’s neither a wedding nor a funeral

- klaus still eating because he deserves it - just give him all the nourishment, please

- why do they always wait to tell each other the most important thing ??? one brain cell - i stg

- “not during christmas” - oh, diego. for those of us with chaotic families, it’s always on christmas

- klaus scooping up five’s empty seat is such big family/sibling energy

- “i didn’t see that one coming!” klaus, luther, and allison look just as confused as i still am

- THIS IS SO WEIRD AND RANDOM

- LITTLE GRACE NOOOO

- time travel is wild. five was right in s1 - i am not smart enough for it.

- “do you love him?” 🥺

- cronenberg would love this. i wonder how much of the virus effect is practical vs. cgi

- klaus’s clothes make a lot more sense for the final showdown since he probably borrowed from one of lila’s relatives

- luther’s borrowed clothing is a bit too luther to be believably borrowed tho

- this is my favorite van 🚐 set piece since little miss sunshine

- allison pulling the emergency brake is the ultimate mom arm 💪

- i too, like five, always end up in the subway (as a new yorker)

- oh shit, i just realized that no one probably told klaus how ben really died - ugh

- but, you know what, allison probably didn’t want to overwhelm the poor guy with more trauma so i’ll let the lack of communication slide this time

- “i can fly now! oh it hurts”

- aim for the tanks… like jaws… the… 🦈 ?

- sigh, five and diego beef is just really not necessary - i’m annoyed

- “my hand is stuck in its ass” !!!

- FIVE AND DIEGO STOP THIS NONSENSE

- WHO CARES ??? this romance is not that important, dude. you’ve been trying to save your family for decades, my guy 😭

- oh damn - is five going to find the right subway station now?

- if they all forget everything like fucking dorothy in kansas, i’m going to be so mad

- holy shit - PET CEMETARY, but like PET SEMETERY !!! you can’t bring someone back, not really… that’s the show 😭

- netflix loves their stephen king

- this is also the lesson in 11/22/63… JFK… yeah

- i could write a thesis on this rn

- we got our coffee shop AU ?!?!

- can i be “cheesecake five”?

- oh… oh no

- THE COMMISSION! THE FOUNDER! AHHHH

- no no no

- don’t make my children not exist 😭

- THIS ISN’T WHAT I SIGNED UP FOR

- i’m sobbing… out of hurt and anger, tbh

- the children/family are on the lifeboats 💔

….

….

…

i’m not going to be ok for a while

klaus didn’t find out how ben died ???

wouldn’t ghost ben have been able to tell him ???

they really did borrow from stephen king because the alien reginald plot was pointless (i’m looking at you, under the dome)

all in all, i’m glad i got to spend time with these characters… we could have gotten even fewer seasons based on how netflix operates. but this ending could have been written/executed so much better.

i would have even smiled if the last scene was with everyone in the void. but no. we get the original ending of the little mermaid with the marigolds instead of sea foam 😫

there were parts of it i did like - especially the cleanse - but i feel like we all deserved better…

i dedicate this post to the memory of dave, sissy, ray, and every other beautiful character who ultimately became disposable. 💔

[stromuprisahat]

In a weird way, I’m kinda sad that sab got canceled. I wanted to see how bad they could make it, you know? Sure, it was no masterpiece (season 1 was decent imo, but season 2 yikes), but i just want to know, what was their actual plan if they were to have gotten a third season? Mal just sailing around? Zoya turning into a badly cgi dragon? Kaz just cleaning the crow club for the spin-off? I just wanted to see it, like if you are going to make it bad, it might as well be funny, yk?

I just love drama ig lol

[imsparky2002]

Barbie in the Nutcracker: First Thoughts

The following is my thoughts while watching this for the first time.

Credits look awful. Still, it’s 2001 and this is the first installment so I’ll give it a pass.

Only know the basic Nutcracker song and theme but nice that it uses an orchestra

Barbie herself doesn’t look too bad but her little sis… yikes.

Kinda weird to see these dolls moving like mocap performers.

Heh! Barbie’s voice actor has the same name as her little sister.

Kelly very clearly sounds like an adult woman trying to do a kiddish voice.

Lipsyncing is odd, looks more like generic flapping.

Surprisingly decent snow effects.

I’m assuming Clara’s parents are either dead or abandoned them. Or they could also just be on vacation.

Is it wrong that I find Grandpa cute? Gives off a very distinguished vibe. Especially that voice.

They call gingerbread houses “christmas boxes”? That’s… interesting.

Kinda wish they gave Clara a different voice from Barbie, or at the very least a different hairstyle.

The lighting is actually pretty good! Nice warm hues, makes me feel like I’m at a cozy inn.

Her little brother looks like the kids who played Fortnite and would tease me in high school. Of course his name is fuckin’ Tommy.

This CGI is reminding me of early PS2 cutscenes.

Aunt Drosselmayer’s got that 90’s Leo DiCaprio/Hugh Grant parting in her hair. Bleh.

Why is Clara the only blonde in the family?

Ooh! We’ve got some family drama between Auntie and Grandpa. This is getting juicy.

Elizabeth is giving me confident bisexual vibes with the voice and manner of movement. Bet you that’s why Grandpa doesn’t trust her.

Looking at the wiki I just found out that Trixie’s VA voices the Aunt, Starlight’s VA is Barbie and Cadence’s VA is one of the kids! Must be a Canadian production.

I will never not find the word “nutcracker” to be hilarious.

Clara, why tf are you fighting over a toy with your lil brother? You’re like… 17? 18? I dunno but it’s way too old.

Seriously they gave Tommy the most punchable face ever. Not that I’d ever punch a kid but I can see why other kids his age would deck him.

Magic shenanigans are ensuing.

I like the medeival look of the rats. The CGI actually fits them well.

Clara wakes up to see an anthropomorphic warrior rat right next to her eating something and is just like “goddamn it, git ya varmint!” I love it.

Oh, she thinks she’s dreaming. That makes sense to why she’s so calm.

Hmm… I feel like the Rat King should look a bit more evil, and larger as well. Still, TIM CURRY! I’m gonna LOVE this.

Woah! We’re getting a fight scene! A swordfighting scene to be exact!

Oooh the Rat King’s magic and can shapeshift his weapon. That’s metal AF.

Tim Curry putting everything into his performance as usual.

I’m kinda surprised we’re already getting a Nutcracker-Rat King battle. I’d have thought they’d save that sorta thing until the third act.

Did they really have to change it to Sugarplum Princess? Fairy just sounds more powerful.

Wow! This snowy cave is beautiful! Something out of a classic painting.

EWWW THESE LIL SNOW FAIRIES LOOK DISGUSTING!

Did this nutfucker not realize that an icy fortress would have ice for the walls?

The fairies doing ballet looks weird because they have nothing to stand on.

Please don’t tell me the small fairy is staying, I hate her.

Dance is currently reminding me of Fantasia.

“The fairies probably went off to make a blizzard somewhere”. The way he said that nonchalantly had me cackling.

The effect of Clara’s footsteps turning into flowers is beautiful.

Pimm sounds like he’s an absolute troll online. Also gives me Psychicpebbles vibes (though I know it’s not him).

Wow the Rat King is a straight up genocider.

Why do all the kids look like Kelly?

OH DEAR GOD THAT LITTLE BOY LOOKS HORRIFYING.

Wait Prince Eric? Are they legally allowed to call him that? We all know how much Disney loves copyrights.

Man these kids are little shits and their outfits are gagworthy.

Major Mint definitely got a big personality, and the voice actor does a good job with it.

Ok Mint is hilarious and is so far the best part of the movie.

Nice to see some Asian rep with Captain Candy.

Wow, Rat King turns his failed employees into stone. Dark!

The zoom in on the Rat King as he says “that’s it?” made me giggle.

Thomas Astruc looked at the Rock Golem and got his first idea for an akuma.

Wait how the hell does Clara know that the Nutcracker is Prince Eric? I mean I already assumed because of the plot of the original ballet, but how does she know?!

The bridge scene gives me the willies, since I’m afraid of heights.

Wow this flower fairy is the only kid-looking character that has a decent design.

Didn’t expect a song to be interrupted by an enemy.

Lol, the Major’s monocle falls off as he sees the giant.

Glad to see the fairies serve a purpose other than dancing. Kick that giant’s ass!

Captain Candy’s a better man than Mint, as he actually makes sure that he gets saved.

Once again, the island is beautiful! Reminds me of Oz with the colored roads.

Ooh clever! At first I thought the castle’s backdrop looked really fake but I just factored it was because it’s 2001 CGI. But it was actually a trap!

Nice we see a test of Clara’s character that she passed.

The invisble hand touching Clara’s hand is actually making me feel kinda teary-eyed internally.

The Rat King definitely has a Napoleon complex.

Loving the character arc for Nutcracker with his final duel.

Ah! So now the Rat King is growing. Fits for the climax.

Huh… Prince Eric looks more like Jimmy Pesto than a prince.

Lol Major Mint realizes he’s been shittalking the prince.

Huh, so Clara’s the princess? I guess it sorta makes sense since it’s her dream.

For those princes out there who are hated by the public, all ya gotta do is fight a giant mouse.

Mint and Candy got the moves! Best dancers of the entire movie.

The final dance between Eric and Clara is absolutely gorgeous.

The villain was taken down by a snowball… I love it.

God Kelly Sheridan and Kirby Morrow really put everything into the scene where Clara disappears.

Lol Kelly’s Canana accent shows up when she says “It’s not a story”.

“What’s all this foolishness about mice kings and bats, Clara? Enough of your womenly hysteria! Time for a lobotomy!” Grandpa, basically.

Actually now that he’s in a suit, Eric looks a lot hotter.

I’m surprised Barbie’s little sister had the attention span to listen to a 1 hour story.

I'll be making a full review of the film soon. Let me know thoughts in the comments and reblogs. @artzychic27 @msweebyness

[opinions-about-tiaras]

Hoo boy. So the first look trailer for Wicked is out and... well, I'm concerned. Thoughts below the cut.

Let me add my voice to what everyone else is saying first and get that out of the way; it looks awful. Visually, I mean. "CGI sludge" is an apt description. I get that they're trying to evoke the feeling of the Judy Garland Wizard of Oz but yikes, it looks terrible. Just a riot of color that evokes nothing and feels flat. The wonder and majesty of Oz this ain't. Even the costumes look cheap and ill-considered.

And look, I get it. This is a movie adaptation, of a stage adaptation, of a book that's basically Wizard of Oz AU fanfiction. They're going to do their own think. But Wicked (The Musical) already sanded off so many of the rough edges of Wicked (The Book) and it looks like this thing is gonna continue in that vein.

But at a certain point when you pour enough water into your wine, you're just drinking water, and it really feels like we've passed that point.

This is an enormously big-budget musical that seems almost ashamed its a musical; you wouldn't know this is musical theater from the trailer, at any rate. That's not a great sign. Neither is the fact that they appear to be doing some sort of "Elphaba's magical power is driven by her being overly emotional and out of control," which is a questionable choice to make when you've cast a black woman in the role.

Actually, let's talk about casting.

Your leads are WAY TOO FUCKING OLD. I know that doesn't make a difference in a stage production. This is not a stage production. Ariana Grande is 30; Cynthia Erivo is thirty-seven. These people are not college freshmen, and expecting us to believe they are is insulting.

Yes, I'm also aware there's a long tradition of expecting us to believe people in their mid-twenties are high school students. There are limits and this pushes past them. The costuming and makeup departments are working hard, but the amount of makeup they're having to cake on Grande and Erivo in order to make them look like fresh-faced youngsters is extremely off-putting. We're not sitting a hundred feet away in a theater, the camera is doing close-ups a lot. Black Elphaba is an excellent choice, but you could have found a much, much younger actress for it.

They also made some... weird choices for diversification of the cast. Not in a "it is historically inaccurate for these people not to be white" kind of a way, but in a "you're sort of undercutting your own themes" kind of a way.

Wicked (The Book) is very explicitly about white supremacy, imperialism, and class. So is every other book in the Wicked Years, when they aren't also about gender fuckery. The musical cuts a lot of that away, but its still there. The Gillikinese (Glinda the Goods specific ethnic group in the context of Oz) are an explicit expression of this. They're economically, culturally, industrially, and socially dominant, and virulently racist against all of Oz's other ethnic groups (the Munchkins, the Animals, the Quadlings, the "Winkies") for whom they have a charming variety of racial slurs and race legislation towards.

Casting a white British person as Fiyero Tigelaar is absurd in this context. Fiyero's whole deal is that he's from a racially disfavored group and is treated pretty shitty because of it! Yes, I am AWARE the role on-state was originated by a white dude. This ain't the play.

Similarly, casting someone who isn't so white they practically glow in the dark as Madame Morrible is kind of a misstep. Madame Morrible is the enforcer of the Wizard's race policy.

And so I have to question... what the hell are they padding this out with?

The stage play is two hours and 45 minutes long. That would translate to the screen fairly handily, on the long side but about where you'd expect a big epic to be these days.

Only they're doing this as TWO movies, like Dune did. Is doing.

As this is likely to be marketed as a family film (I'm expecting a PG rating) they might just be making two ninety-minute films so that parents aren't off-put by the idea of their kids squirming in chairs for three hours. But given that the director and writers have spoken repeatedly about how this story was just "too big" to be contained in a single film, and that they're planning to add a whole bunch of stuff, that seems unlikely. I have a hard time seeing both movies clock in at a runtime of under four hours.

So what are you going to do here?

I had been hoping at first that they were going to re-add in a bunch of the themes and plot points from the novel. And maybe they are? But I sense that they're being timid here. That they're gonna pull their punches and make this a very straightforward, very paint-by-numbers story about a generically evil tyrant with the race and class stuff shoved way, way, way into the background. For that matter I expect them to dial the queerness back as well, which would be awful because my god is Wicked queer.

I dunno. This just seems like a lot of red flags.

[ladystrallan]

Once Upon a Time season 6B thoughts

I’m rewatching OUAT and I wanted to share some of my opinions on each season!

- Ooh Ruth pulling the knife

- I was wondering for a second where snow was

- I forgot she was cursed

- Dad???

- “If I wanted advice I doubt I’d take it from a pirate” low blow

- Omg the coin

- “That demon box” not the alarm clock

- Robin coming back is so stupid I can’t believe it

- Hook is going to propose!!!

- The ring is not that fabulous though

- Daddy issues David

- His lucky coin :(

- Yikes Robin

- Aw he did the deal pro bono :(

- Rumple… what a softie

- “The hearts of my enemies” why do you still have those???

- I don’t even care that they’re kissing this is just stupid

- Not them spinning around

- Pleasure Island!!!

- Omg Pinocchio

- “I’m also your father” ok strange man I’ve never met

- Knife fight

- Sad moment for David

- Great acting though

- Awww this is cute

- Omg hook killed david’s dad!!!

- Noooo this is not good

- ‘The first ogres war’ so there’s multiple???

- They need to trip them or something

- Not the wilhelm scream lol

- Slayyyyyy Rumple

- Ogre war redemption arc

- No bae :(

- #bullying

- Rumple :(

- Bae I thought you wanted him to be good

- Giving mixed signals here

- Omg he memory erased him so he wouldn’t turn dark

- Awwww this is so cute

- They’re engaged!

- I am so sick of the EQ just go away

- “I sleep in hay! … which is on dirt” lol

- Oh no

- Emma is really good at finding out things before hook can tell her

- Not the ring coming off…

- I bet the arrow is gonna point at her

- They’re going to sword fight???

- I knew it

- Are they just twins now or what?

- This is stupid

- I thought Regina couldn’t use that wand

- Plot hole alert

- I completely forgot about this

- Oh no

- Gideon no

- Can they not stop the submarine once it goes?

- Kraken hunting time!

- Aladdin and jasmine are back!

- Did he just make him into a sceptre???

- No one remembers achmed I guess

- CGI is looking a little rough

- What is this outfit Regina???

- Ariel! Love her

- That magic carpet cgi… bad

- Drunk snow lol

- Omg it was Jafar!

- “I can see my hovel from here” why does everyone have a hovel in this show???

- Awwwww captainswan

- Of course it was Gideon

- Ok kill the black fairy is not a bad thing to do

- Not the minor miners

- Ooh spooky intro

- Slay

- Nothing beats a good left hook

- “I’m your real mother” okay grandma (literally)

- Is rumbelle back together???

- Yasssss

- Omg Henry is possessed

- “Let’s get my pirate back” awwwww

- Omg I hate this ugly cgi spider

- Nooooo it was Roderick

- Omg not Isaac

- He’s so creepy

- Gideon what the fuck

- Ooh the lost boys are back

- Lots of returning people this season

- I wish hades would return :(

- Rumple slayyyyy

- Why do her guards look like they’re from Star Wars?

- Nooooo she killed Roderick

- “This is on you, Gideon. And my boot.” Good line

- Omg she has his heart

- “Dark one junior” lol

- PTA meeting is getting intense

- RUMBELLE

- Omg she got through!!!

- She has such Coraline other mother vibes

- Lol peace out loser

- Omg tiger lily

- Omg underworld reference??? The flower growing in the crack

- Nice to see long hair rumple again

- Emma’s name was his curse break thingy!!!

- They’re going to burn him at the stake???

- Awwwww this is so cute

- Slay Leroy

- Get a room

- Omg they’re all asleep

- Oh good not for long

- Ooh zelena in the recap

- “Why don’t you practice on my axe” omg

- This is the tin man I know it

- Ooh you’re looking for trouble touching zelena’s baby

- Yikes captainswan keep it PG

- “Am I interrupting something?” Omg

- Omg is that the bassinet that Zelena was abandoned in?

- We love a girlboss that takes things into her own hands

- “I sacrificed hades for you” that was a mistake

- But seriously Regina is not one bit grateful for what Zelena did for her, give up her true love to save her life

- At a time when Regina had Henry and was friends with the Charmings and Zelena had no one

- And Regina even BLAMES her for Robin’s death

- Robin had it coming but that’s another thing

- Snow’s date with Whale…

- Slay zelena

- Like a lion could take her… let’s be real

- “Go back to Oz” LOW BLOW

- That was so unwarranted

- Maybe if you guys weren’t so awful to Zelena then she wouldn’t fall into those traps

- That is so selfless to give up her magic to help everyone

- She is amazing

- That apology is long overdue

- Omg not Malcom

- That pathetic little man

- Baby rumple!

- The perfect name? How did you end up with Rumplestiltskin?

- Omg Rumple was supposed to be the saviour! (I remembered that)

- Rumple smash!

- At least there was no glass involved

- OMG ITS THE BLACK FAIRY!!!

- AND GIDEON!!!

- Where did Regina get a green car?

- ZELENA HIT HER WITH THE CAR

- SLAYYYYYY

- Zelena 1, black fairy 0

- Twist!!!

- She is the evil omg

- “I need my power” Rumple really had no chance

- Nooo he named him that because he hated him

- Something is suspicious

- Awwww he asked Henry to be his best man

- I knew rumple was up to something

- Why is he doing this???

- I love this episode!

- I know a lot of people don’t like it but I think it makes so much sense for this show to have a musical episode

- Like the Disney movies are musicals

- And the songs slap

- Ooh slay intro

- Omg it’s just so good!!!

- Everyone is amazing but josh dallas has a great voice

- Ooh that neck brake choreo

- I’m not a Regina fan but I have to admit she slayed

- Lana did a great job

- “You’ve come to say goodbye” nooooo

- This is so sad

- Killian’s song might be my second favourite

- It just fits him so well and Colin slayed

- Poison dart!!!

- They should have brought Hades back for this episode

- Greg was in the obc of Assassins

- Rumple should have gotten a song tbh

- Zelena slays so hard!!!

- Wicked always wins is the best song

- Although they should have made a wicked reference

- Rebecca Mader is so awesome

- Rumple why are you being evil???

- It is a little silly that their plan is just sing at her

- Not Henry tossing the book

- That was kinda funny

- Slayyyy

- I love how her song is the OUAT theme

- Captainswan is so cute

- Their vows!!!

- I love happy beginning such a good closing number

- This is so beautiful

- “The black fairy’s curse, it’s here!” Slay Leroy we love an iconic line

- Awwww season 1 recap

- You know what I miss?

- THERE IS A TOWN IN MAINE

- Omg this is older Henry

- Oooh curse again

- Archie: Henry, I think you’re crazy

- Not Emma in the mental hospital

- Not Fiona being the new mayor!!!

- How many sons is she going to try and kidnap???

- Gold & Sons that’s kinda cute

- Lost their mother??? What happened to belle???

- Pull ups in the mental hospital lol

- I love a good hook and david team up

- “We fought for our love and we won” awwwww

- “She said she was going to the store and she never came back” noooo

- Deadbeat belle…

- Omg not the EQ

- Awwww he called Killian his son

- “Hmmm. Merlot” LOL

- A dragon… is that maleficent?

- NOT THE BADLY PHOTOSHOPPED PICTURES OF BELLE TRAVELLING

- I CANT OMG

- Rumple please tell me you don’t believe this

- Not the falling video

- Omg no don’t burn the book

- I can’t believe she did that

- “Hello there, mummy” KILLIAN

- Omg that is so funny

- She came back!!!

- Slayyy rumple

- Noooo tempting him with Bae

- “All magic comes with a price” slayyyyy

- Omg dead

- Lol slay Henry

- “Some honeymoon, huh?” Lol I love them

- Omg charming swearing now you know it’s serious

- Not his dark one self convincing him

- Yasssss Rumple character development

- Noooo he resisted but it didn’t work

- Wtf

- Omg gideon is a baby again

- A little weird but ok

- Awwwww rumbelle

- Of course Robin proposed gotta do that fan service

- And in the tackiest way too

- OMG RUMBELLE

- THEY ARE ADORABLE

- Awww this is so cute

- Everyone got their happy ending

- Honestly a perfect finale

- Idk if I’m gonna watch season 7 because I remember hating it and this is such a perfect ending

How I feel about the characters this season

Love: Zelena, Emma, Hook

Like: Rumple, Belle, David, Jasmine, Ariel

Neutral: Henry, Snow, Gideon, Fiona (she’s camp idk), Aladdin, Regina

Dislike:

Hate:

I honestly can’t hate anyone this season

Season rating: 9/10

Not my favourite season but actually a really solid ending to an amazing show. Some of it was dumb but a lot of it was awesome. I loved the musical episode and the finale! Tbh it should have ended here.