#but thats not a good enough deal i guess
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lmao tried to quit my job but im a huge fucking pushover so my boss spent 40 minutes begging me to stay and it stressed me out so bad I wanted to cry so I said I'd fucking stayyyyy LMFAO WHY AM I LIKE THIIIIIISSSSSS
#i AM going to actually have to grow some balls and learn to say no someday#clearly tho today was not that day#i even said id stay for a month or more til he could hire and train someone else 😑#but thats not a good enough deal i guess#and then he asked me IF I USE HARD DRUGS AND THATS WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME??????#i was like holy fuck bro if i dont go home right now im going to start!!!!killing!!!people!!!!!!!!!!
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i often really do feel like an .. unwanted part of the fandom, i dont draw beautiful landscapes, i have unpopular but strong opinions im constantly annoying about and rarely change, dont like/dont draw the pretty young popular twinks and hot gurls to fanboi over nor do i turn characters into one, the opposite moreso, draw only one ship no ones heard of really, got little energy to interact with the few people that are nice to me and send me asks so it probably looks like im ignoring everyone and unfortunately but still rarely get so stressed i get overwhelmed and emotional about pehaps seemingly minor things and spiral almost into a breakdown feeling super embarrassed about it afterwards but the damage is already done and i look like a freak or agressive weirdo
#ganondoodles talks#also probably sounds like self pity#but this feeling hits everytime i see a super popular artist be the popular cool artist#i am a little weird i know that and thats not somethign bad i think#but the internet never gets to see that much of me#i tend to write posts when i am at my worst bc it has to go somewhere#so the image it tells people is that im a weirdly strong opiniod freak that gets breakdowns over nothing#i also dont feel like im otherwise -cool tm- enough to balance that out#i dont think my art is as stylized or as inventive as others nor am i cool to interact with bc idk how to be cool to interact with#i feel double bad when i misstepped with someone i used to talk to bc of something stupid ... or just dont know what i did wrong#im guessing its especially when i am in that spiraling state of mind where i really am not myself tbh#it still feels very bad bc i feel like i can never make it up to anyone again#sorry i acted like a jerk my brain was exploding in emotions in a desperate attempt to deal with something idk how to deal with-#-and made me not act like myself but now i feel really dumb about it#doesnt sound like a good excuse#... i want to thank those that do stick with me#even if i acted strange sometimes- even if i disappointed sometimes- even when i couldnt keep a promise#there are little things that still make me angry at myself#like that one time i asked in the tags whod read as long as the end of them and if someone did shoudl send me an ask so id draw a lil thing#and i got two#and i kept trying to remeber oh shit i need to do that and forgetting again/not having energy for it in a loop#i still feel like a jerk about it but now its probably too late#i wish i could answer all asks i get but man my energy for that is always rock bottom#no matter how much i enjoy the ask#and i love getting asks!!!#im sorry :((
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i wish it wasn't so normal for people to complain about unfinished wips or fics that take a long time to update. because sometimes i think i have a really fun idea for a fic but it'd take a while for me to write, and i like talking about my work as i do it and i don't like writing entire fics over like 20k without sharing, because i lose steam. so if i were to write and post that cool fic idea, it'd be as a wip. and then i think about all the people who just refuse to engage with wips, or all the other people who would just go "update pls" all the time, and of how people only really comment in the first 24 hours something is posted and then it's lost to obscurity, and then i just go "actually whats the point in going through the effort writing this out? i'll just daydream about it now and then and be done with it." and then i don't write it. alas!
#rimi talks#shoutout to that one person who followed me from resi fandom and commented on one of my dc fics like ''pls update that resi fic''#also shoutout to all those tumblr posts about how theres nOthInG wOrSe than finding a GoOd FiC but its uNFiNIsHeD#i used to really like writing longfic but these days i kind of shy away from it bc it rly does get discouraging#like they say ''write for yourself'' and i do but i certainly dont share just for my own satisfaction yk???#anyways. i already have space fic and theres no need for me to start another fic. even if it would be fun.#ive also just been in a Mood about writing since yesterday and thats not helping matters 😔#but it feels like a stupid thing to be in A Mood about. idk. whatever jdlksk hopefully itll pass and ill be normal tomorrow :/#bc talking to duck earlier today we came up with a really fun mermay fic premise. but. writing? me? multichap again? lol. lmao even#like i would love to!!!!!! having two ongoing multichaps wouldnt kill me i like to pingpong between wips#but dealing with people whining about update times or telling me they refuse to read bc its a wip...... dunno if i can do that again fellas#okay. enough woes and whining. i guess i will go play a video game
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the masculine urge to take a saucepan off thr draining board and bash myself repeatedly over the head with it until I pass out and no longer have to experience feeling Bad 😍
#struggling to tolerate this one ngl its fucking dire this weekend. i just cant do this man#thr things i would fucking do for attention please. just one person to notice and care in the slighest i feel like im losing my fucking#mind out here how does every single person who has ever mattered to me in my lifr see me in distress and choose to ignore it or maybe they#dont even recognise im ij distress in the first place i dont know whats worse i dont think i hide it well at all im just so done#listen like ultimately its fucking fine. i will get myself through it like ive gotten myself through everything else in my fuckijg life#i dont even feel bad that often these days im doing so so so much better and its so much more tolerable to only have to deal with this#once or twice a week instead of it being a struggle every single day like i dont think i could go back to feeling like that again ever i#dont know how i managed to get througyh it before jesus fucking christ. but i can deal with it i can deal with this#ik ill feel fine tomorrow. its just thr fact im so desperately fucking alone with it that makes it so much worse than it has to be#i fucking hate repression i hate being so incapable of expressing myself that its easier for me to injure myself than it is to talk about#how i feel to anyone i hate being trapped in this stupif fucking torture labyrinth and not knowing how to get out of it and never being#given a single avenue anything to hold onto i hate having to do it alone every single fucking time and when i do try i just freeze out#entirely i cant form a coherent thought my brain enters total fucking shutdown pure static white noise fuzz and i dont know why please#its so unfair i dont think its that much to want a little comfort. just once just for someone to stay with me while i cry it doesnt have#to be more than that i just dont want to be alone like this i just want to feel safe around someone just close to someone just once#and well ill survive without it bc i always have i guess. so far at least. and there are many things im grateful for and i do in general#feel pretty okay my life is pretty good at times even. i feel so pathetic and stupid and ashamed for even feeling like this#but do i have to go my entire life without ever experiencing any kind of real intimacy with another person emotionally that is#i mean physical is nice too and they go hand in hand in some ways but i just want to feel seen and safe over anything.im tired#i feel like i try.but not hard enough i know its all my fault really but i dont know how to try any harder but nothing will ever change if#i dont i cant expect anyone to do anything if i cant rven communicate in thr first place. oh i dont want to think about it anymore#i have a headache from crhing and its not even 8pm ugh. okay. well it is what it is.#ill breathe until i calm down and then tidy up whatever i left in the kitchen and get my work stuff ready for tmr#and polish my boots maybe. and read and go to bed at 9:30 i think. and ill feel fine in the morning#my fault for thinking about it earlier i know i shouldve nipped it earlier on its such an easy spiral to fall into i need to get better#it happens. okay anyway. no cause for concern im good guys. weakly thumbs up at the camera all covered in blood#my period is late actually thats probably all this is lmao. makes sense thinking abt it#cant wait for it to finally start and all earthly desire to leave my body so i never experience pain again amen#.vent#ignore this sorry for being mentally ill im not even that mentally ill anymore so no excuse rly ummmm. bit embarrassing innit.
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sometimes the popular interpretations of a character can be very wrong/kinda boring. maybe referring to sephiroth here….
#theres a lot of them that i just…. don’t understand why they exist#liek idk i see ppl make him a womanizer/a total seductive asshole and its like.. did we play the same games?#he just wouldnt be like that. The only reason why that exists is bc of ppl being thirsty unfortunately#which takes up a good majority of seph fans.#not saying that’s particularly bad but it can impact how ppl view/interpret characters VERRY heavily#but aside from that i think ppl r too boring with him. i dont get to see true silly guy pre nibelheim seph#whats the deal… why…#honestly we should have more loser seph art. i need more nerdy seph content man#i cant just be tje only one that does everything….#SIGHHH…. whatever… I guess…#maybe if i tried hard enough nerdy lameo seph will become a popular thing#(acting like idgaf so it happens faster)#sorry. thats enough . this is too long#ill continue sharing my niche hcs on here… and hope they stick with someone
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💔
#waaahhh feeling BAD again.....#like few months ago my friend asked if i had new years free and i ASSUMED that meant we were like planning smth together?????#and today she mentions in a GROUP CHAT that shes spendingnnew years with her bf#and like. ok. fine. good for them i guess#but i just rly wished she woulda told me like before#and it happened while i was at a Christmas party toooo.... now im sad and just not drunk enough#feeling lonely#i rly thought i had like things going up things looking good finally friends and shit#and like obviously i know her bf is the most important person to her thats how it works#but likee feels bad yk#cause apparently to her this wasnt even that big of a deal cos she didnt bother mentioning it yo be before#and i have no one#my other friends invited us both (thats how i found out) but theyre a couple too so i dont wanns go third wheeling their new years yk#i just#u think its going so well#and suddenly i just feel like ughhhh#this is cringe even writing i might delete this tomorrow when im sober and awake#but like. everyones got someone and ive been trying to click with someone for 20 fucking years#and still#:(((((((((#and like it feels bad not being anyones most important person#and like i know so many ppl are in this situation im not trying to be like wahhh my suffering is unique but like it just feels bad#very bad esp when ur tired as fuck and alone and shit#:(((((#my post#everything SUCKS!!!!!!!!!
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#woof. if all goes to plan Tomorrow is the last day i have to take measurements forever. if all goes to plan. if all goes to plan. but im#not holding my breath bc thats asking for chaos. i think this week ive done a good job of not pushing it#in terms of not torturing myself and making myself insane. which is good bc its exhausting taking measurements with the ambient stress of#apartment hunting from across the country. ive toured 2 places from afar and applied to them. and im meeting with someone to talk abt#potentially being roommates tomorrow. which is terrifying bc i really just wanna beg them like pls pls like me so i can stop looking pls#like i have to rely on my charisma i guess when im a bit asocial and odd. not unlikable but idk maybe they want someone more normie idk#its exhausting. ive sent so many emails and so many places r like no u gotta physically visit. ugh#and i have to clean my whole apartment by Tuesday for my landlord to inspect bc i had to give them a 30 day notice or else they wouldn't#release my info for like referal on background checks. there should b flexibility in when i can leave tho. its just stressful#at least im doing this when im pretty stable and i stop taking measurements tomorrow but i haven't taken a break since last Saturday#and haven't really had time to properly draw which annoys me and apparently i wont get a break this weekend with all the cleaning i gotta do#but oh well. at least im better off than the other person i kno who is moving Tuesday across the country and currently doesnt have a place#to stay. so i guess theyre gonna b living out of their car for a while. im stressed enough a month out from leaving#sigh. im just v tired and my heart is beating too fast and i wanna start cleaning now but im sleepy#whenever we go sampling we joke that we have to make sacrifices to the weather gods for good conditions. i guess i gotta make sacrifices#to the housing gods 🙏 ugh. pls. i dont wanna still b doing this for another week when i wont have time bc ill actually have to focus on#things. ugh. cant wait to b in the future where i dont have to deal with this#unrelated
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oh my god ... i made it through the holidays with pmdd going on at the same time. christ. i should win an award or something honestly. someone should give me money for this. that's a fucking feat and a half.
#we're not celebrating Actual new years bc of work schedules#we did our new years family party tonight instead fhdjfkl#so i am freeee except for a family video call tomorrow for an hourish but thats tolerable usually#anyways YAY YIPPEE WAHOO I AM NOT DEAD !!!! I DID IT !!! I SURVIVED!!! ALL WHILE DEALING WITH PMDD AT THE SAME TIME !!!#im a fucking legend for that truly fhdkdl honestly it wasnt looking good there for a bit but by god i made it thru#and with no new split-offs afaik which is great fjdkdl maybe we have enough parts in the brain to handle this shit finally#please please please no more fjdksl#but goddamn im actually rly impressed i made it thru god fucking damn !!!!! thats crazy!!!! lowkey didnt think i would!!! yay!!!#idk if i actually feel happy abt it tbh but i am amazed at my ability to cling on i guess#okay i gotta stop thinking abt this now otherwise we're going to get into rocky territory and i dont wanna deal w that at 1am#but yay yippee wahoo hurray etc good for me way 2 go gold star on my nametag etc etc etc#pippen needs 2nd breakfast
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Ignore
#delete later#did a good compromise today. my therapist will be proud. only minorly panicky now#and have been making my chainmail things and it makes me very happy#have started designing the arm bracers abd bought fabric glue for the material ill be using#probs gonna make it velcrow abd add decorative buckles so dont have to worry about flaps of material#have the shape sorted and am gonna experiment with foam and stuff#have a good idea pf how to attach thr chainmail to it. just how to make it all stiff enough that it keeps its shape#ive been using cardboard for a lot of things but i dont like using it for wearable stuff bc i worry about washing things#im a messy person i need to be able to wash things without it falling apart#i have a yoga mat that might be good. i would just need to figure oit how to set it in a certain position#i have a tube i can dry it over. it might be a douse in pva and dry over cellophaned tube sorta deal#the cape is going well. hood is finished. cloak itself needs to be sewed around tge bottom and the front edge hemmed#thrn its just attaching thrm and decorating#i have fake autumn leaves abd acorns and i want to sculpt some shelf mushrooms out of my super light clay#but idk if thats overkill. i mean its my costune so that doesbt matter i guess. im very proud of myself on this project and i love it#and i even nabaged to do sone work roday despite only being able to think about chainmail#legit spent entire morning making the main piece. needs lengthening but its looking good abd solid#OH ALSO I FUCKING CALLED THE DENTISTS. i havent been in four years bc of anxiety abd TODAY I CALLED A PLACE#REGISTERED THERE AND MADE AN APPOINTMENT FOR NEXT WEEK#i did SO WELL TODAY
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L m f a o I think I know who sent the "entitled little shit" anon last night actually
Not naming names but it's nice to actually be able to block them
#speculation nation#dont know for sure but it was someone who was following me who's not now#saw them in the tag and had an epiphany.#mostly guess-work but i have a good memory & i Know they followed me recently. only to unfollow.#im gonna stop complaining about this after this post but like. lmfao.#upon waking up i thought back to it and i Still think im right#calling someone an 'entitled little shit' due to justified anger in a place where they cant even SEE IT#is not that big of a deal lmfao.#i promise u there is so much more vitriolic stuff in other ppl's tags on that post & That's the hill u choose to die on? ok.#reads like someone who hasnt been on tumblr much. ive seen soooo much worse around. 'entitled little shit' is Tame#and frankly? the blatant truth! the person in that post is 100% entitled.#and i have the right as a writer to call them a little shit about it 😊#as for how i recognized them. i do look at new followers. blocking bots & checking to see if id wanna follow back#that sorta thing. im a little selective bc i dont want my dash to be too long so i dont follow back that often#but im generally aware of my followers. & i appreciate & recognize them when theyre nice to me. even if theyre not mutuals.#so yea this person was recognizable enough for me to notice their absence. & they so helpfully posted in main tag for me to see.#im not gonna start a fight directly with them but i sure as hell am gonna be a petty little bitch on my own blog#that's what this is FOR man! whats the POINT if i cant complain?????#anyways Yea thats all for that weird little bit of drama. putting Entitled Little Shit to rest.
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moving on with life and trying to heal and just live are all good concepts and i do love that for riza. but it comes at a high price and sometimes it's just hard.
it's not just the memories from war, or the guilt and remorse. all of that too ofc, but also the complete 180 in her life plans. having to find purpose in life and readjust her whole outlook on her objectives and who she is an individual and try to adjust to normalcy and ~ living in a society ~ which she never had the chance to do because she didn't think she would live for it anyways.
even having her son, whom she loves more than anything and brings so much happiness and contentment to her life, riza is still plagued with anxiety and frankly scared. it's not entirely rational, she knows this much. but a lot of her fears are grounded in very real concerns.
what if she's just not a good parent since she didn't have a good childhood? what if something happens to her baby and she has to bury him like the children she buried in ishval? what if someone targets him for what he looks like?
the best she can do is protect him for as long as she can and try to prepare him and give him all the tools to succeed in a world that is often unkind and unjust.
and i think that's also reflective of her work and how much she can realistically do to make amends.
#i don't think we know enough about amestris to determine if sinophobia would be a thing there but#the possibility is there#and even though the conflict with ishval was essentially fabricated there's enough to believe the homunculi picked on them bc they were an#ethnic minority. idk. i'm not set on anything here maybe ppl writing these characters should add their 2 cents.#the point is. healing is good but it's also painful and an never ending difficult process.#and part of that process is for riza to realise there's a lot of stuff she won't be able to 'fix' in the world#stuff that her own child is going to have to deal with and she won't be able to shield him from it forever#idk i feel like thats a pretty clear illustration of how royai trying to make things better is still only two people#i'm sure they do a lot of good. but it's unlikely they would single handedly end racism and xenophobia and all systemic problems that#allowed the war to happen. sure they can still try and that's what matters i guess#that wasnt even what this post was about originally but uh#here we are i guess thank you brain#headcanons.#long post#cw child death mention
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maybe i WILL get to move back home
#the bin#i talked to my mom and things might go ok but idk#i just have to wait and see but i desperately hope i can move. i need to see a doctor so bad. my whole body feels horrible all the time#and my tooth has gotten so much worse. i can deal with it if thres an end date. i cant deal with it indefinitely. and i cant afford to get#it fixed without insurance. i would rather die than deal with this shit for another however long i have to i CAN NOT do that#esp bc i would need to go to work while experiencing it. idk. im shaky literally ALL the time and my insides alwyas hurt and my joints#hurt so much too. and half the time im at work my chest hurts and i cant see straight. i cant fuckin do this anymorew.#apparently my dad might be getting a new job so their landlord might be more willing to renew but idk. she said she should know on april 1st#which isnt that far away but idk. i mean. its not impossible theyll renew. who knows. i hope so.#i know at keast thst i have a way to get there if there is a place for me to live so thats good. my health cant take this anymore. and im#also not able to emotionally. idk what other option i have but. god. its hard enough as is. im having like a perpetual panic attack since i#found out i probs wont get to move. im tryna be optimistic. i dont think im physically capable of staying here any longer#it was hard enough to stay herenthis extra yearm ive been having breakdowns repeatedly over it. and my physical health keeps worsening#i miss my little sister. i wanna be able to see the people i care about. theres so few people in the world i enjoy being around and i dont#get to see them ever. instead i have to see my second least favorite person in the world in order to even just get groceries#hhhh. i want the time to pass so i can know for sure but i also desperately dont wnat it to cause im so scared itll be bad news#whatever. i will hope and believe that itll work out until i know that it wont. hhhhh. worst case scenario i guess ill just have to save up#and figure out moving there later on but like. i was really happy to NOT have to worry abt rent or working so i could focus on my health and#then i could go back that that stuff. oh well
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#personal#warning: suiciceeand selfharmn talk in this rant#i think these meds are making me feel worse and i dont know what to do about it#gettinf used to these meds in the first place was so hard. i cant do it again#and like. i dont know.#iwant ro kill myself so bad and the only reason i can find is “maybe it will make someone sad”#but even that uts like. thats not a reason for me#theres no benefits for Me staying alive#like holy shit sometimes i forget i am So suicidal and then i have a night like this#usually these thougjs come late at night which is whyni started going to bed earlier#but things are changing and its 7:09 and im dealing with these thoughts Now#like Wow i guess injust deal with these thoughts forever no matter what. cool...#and i domt know. feeling the scars rub up against my sleeve makes me feel so bad#like theyre healing super fast but its still not enough#i think the worst part is the relief i always have after. i feel ao bad but thus tike especiallu i was jusy like#i cant believe people are reying to stop me from doing rhis... its so good for me#but like the blood soaked towel is doing nothing to help anyone#idk. i dont kmow what to do to feel better anymore#💭
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Also in my current main oni playthrough I'm at 22 duplicants and my goal for the playthrough is to get all of them so I'm abt halfway there but god damn do I not have enough space for more of these fuckers I'm going to be able to shove some more into my two newest colonies on the two planetoids I've traveled to so far but one of them like Just got started so it's going to be a while before I'm confident in upscaling it, and the other one is mostly made up of radioactive biomes and salt water biomes with the only more livable biomes being at the very edges and the very bottom of the map, so while I do have a pretty stable base getting set up over there it's going to be pretty obnoxious getting the living space set up due to how little space I have in my current main base area and how far away the other forest biomes are from that. On the bright side I found the mysterious hermit home on the brand new planetoid so I at least don't have to worry abt him as much, although I'm gonna be real idk how I'm going to get food production up and running since there's like No dirt, and I don't rly want to have to send someone back up through the surface magma biome to pick up any dropped off supplies.
#rat rambles#the good news is that theres sleet weat on the newest one so once I get a lil more established thats smth I can start farming#theres also grub fruit and sweetles so Ill probably we farming those for a bit too#I say for a bit because while there is a sulfur gyser there its in the magma and I dont wanna fuck with that right now at least#if I was better at this game Id totally go for it but Im not so Ill take the cowards route#hopefully I can print some other seeds into that colony although Im not rly sure which plants Id want#I guess bristle blossoms wouldnt be bad? most of the planet is quite warm tho so idk#its mostly wasteland and chilly biomes Im pretty sure so not the best but could be worse#the main big big issue is going to be oxygen production and water#for now Im probably going to start moving ice to a warmer part of the map to melt it but after that idk#I guess I could just get the hermit and then bounce#honestly thats probably what Ill do since I really dont want to have to deal with the limited water#all my other colonies have infinite water sources already so I might as well focus living quarters there#my first colony is gonna stay limited tho since its the rly cold starting planetoid#Ive gotten my main base warm enough but I dont rly want to expand too much from there#mostly because the left of it is my sleet wheat farm and the right is where my cold slush guyser is#which I rly Should warm up more but Im going to be real I dont want to go too heavy on the forced warming#I want to leave myself with room to build more machinery without burning my base up basically#my other main planetoid is basically paradise for the dupes living there tho theyre doing great my chef even gets his own personal bedroom#I have a great farm set up and have way way more food than even ten more dupes could ever eat#I have been considering bringing in more dupes there but I wanna up my oxygen production more first#I finally ran out of algae and while I could theoretically produce more Ive slowly transferring to the water eating oxygen producer instead#I say slowly cause the process of getting the steam guiser on that plannet to be a decent water supply has been rough#its still not done since Im trying to get a steam turbine cooling loop set up on the other planet to utalize both the water and steam#but its been real hard given the lack of usable space in that colonu#my main problem is that I cant get the temperature to stay at a consistent level due to using heavy wiring#which is really frustrating since these things have so much power flowing through them I absolutely cannot afford to use normal wiring#like I could try to implement power tranformers into the design but Id really rather not since thatd mean taking up even more space#I might just get a insulated heavy wire connector mod or smth I rly cant be bothered after putting this much time into this project#oni posting
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on that note. heyy wait no nvm what i was abt to say i think i just found the glitch in the matrix here.. OHHHHH I DID
#LETS GOOO I WAS WONDERING IF ID FIND ANYTHING ABT THIS SOON#imagine a whole ass country getting kh2 prologues photo'd. would that be fucked up or what#i love when the game gets ever so slightly fucked up lookin. i wish i could play this on a crt#'choosing someone to date is a little out of your comfort zone' Hello. aspec beam blasting siffrin rn#'WE HAVE ONE OF THOSE AT HOME'.... god#MIRABELLE ASPEC BEAM AS WELL????#oh my god these poor kids have to deal with amatonormativity too. as if the time freezing shit wasnt enough#oh my god?#SIFFRIN CONFIRMED ASEXUAL REAL?????????????????????#!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! H#0(-(#finally some good fucking aspec rep and TWO OF THEM AT ONCE we are so winning. hhhholy shit my heart#'how do you deal with it then' '[you dont]' yeah 👍#these 2 are very much my favorites. i already knew that before this lil thing but im so . !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#BOOSTS ALL OF HER STATS BY HOW MUCH??? CHRIST. OK#holy shit shes just busted now#AGH MY COMPUTER BATTERY#well i got thru Odiles thingy too at least. hers was vv good too.....#was trying to speed thru bonnies but i kept getting the questions wrong sjcbksbx#thats it for tonight i guess. bc i am Not getting up to get my charger rn#isat#isat spoilers
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oh we have moved onto Elton John fuck yes
#personal#okay also. so everyone i work with is in this band and they have this yearly festival here that i guess is kind of a big deal#and im just vibing like oh are these essentially local celebs? ill never know i dont go here#but ANYWAY sometimes. people who work together. dont communicate very well#and then i get to hear about it which on one hand is funny but on the other hand i am not separated enough from this to be#full blown hilarious. ya know?#so im like eheheh drama oh no! i am Here#no im not apart of the drama but what if someone asks my opinion. ill just start biting and surely thats not good for business#anyway what ive learned is Don't work for your friends#especially dont work for them for free#im the outlier truly bc EVERYONE here knows each other one way or another#perhaps they're even childhood friends#and i am not even from this state lol let alone the city or age group lmaooooo
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