#but that is no longer possible
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Still in a state of zonked out misery
The allergies this year. Wtf?
My face looks like it was punched.
.
.
Add in the extra misery of not having good sleep for the past two months for reasons mostly out of my control (good sleep should return this Saturday night, hopefully, when a whole bunch of new furniture finnnnnnally arrives).
And then there is the recovery from ??? Which left my digestive system in a bad place (now recovered although I am still on a medically strict/controlled diet but slowly adding safe-ish foods back in).
My eyes are so red and crusty. Fucking trees.
#fwiw: I prefer to sleep alone#bc all the space— I need it#but that is no longer possible#due to other circumstances#so now I am in a state of misery#until this king sized mattress and bed#arrive#and hopefully that is enough room#for two people and two LARGE BREED CATS#ugh
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i blacked out sorry
#vbros#venture bros#the venture brothers#dr girlfriend#dr mrs the monarch#the monarch#vbros sheila#malcom fitzcarraldo#admin draws#fanart#still no idea how to tag anyyything#anywaygjquick doodles#i mightbe had more to say but ive been forgetting to post these for 3 days now. possibly longer
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Getting shrunk down by some enemy’s devil fruit and being only about six inches tall, and so Sanji now has to take care of a very small you. You sit on his shoulder or inside of his front pocket for most of the day. You switch around from hiding behind his collar and curling up against his neck to dipping behind his ear so you can rest up against him as you talk. He can barely contain the love that swells in his chest as he gets to cradle all of you in his hands. He is always gentle with you, but now he has to take it to a new level, and somehow becomes even softer with you than you thought possible.
Playing hide and seek, too, in the kitchen. Hiding behind the spices and containers, and once he’s close, dashing off to some pot or jar and clambering in. Running about and playing as he cooks. He sees flashes of you as you hop about, but let’s you have your fun, thinking that you’re outwitting him. It’s only when you peek out and fail to see him—carefully stepping out and staring out toward where you swear you saw him last—that he’ll come up from behind and snatch you up, delighting in the sounds of surprise you let out.
#one piece#one piece x reader#black leg sanji#vinsmoke sanji#sanji x reader#I might have more for the this the longer I think on it KDKSK#a lot of possibilities perhaps
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I think about the fact Anya locking herself in the infirmary with Curly to kill herself and how it is in way reclaiming a space that was initially hers from Jimmy.
Not to mention how she must've been aware of Jimmy's obsession with Curly and the idea that he would lose his power over the both of them (based on the fact she likely thought they would never get the door open) and having to face the responsibility of two deaths being on his hands as acting captain.
It was her final act of agency stuck on that ship with her abuser and it says something that she chose to die next to Curly, despite his inaction, leaned against him as if they were just in a casual conversation before her death. Despite everything, Anya made the final decision on her own terms and it speaks volumes considering her treatment and demeanor up until that point.
#sadly this did not work but I slso assume that she chose to use all the pills because she did not htink theyd be able to keep curly alive#too much longer without her knowledge and seeing how everyone died almost immediately following her death well...#I think Anya is merciful and would've killed Curly if she did not feel like Jimmy would retaliate as she would understand being at the merc#of someone who only resents you and sees you less than a person now. Like do i think she fully forgave him for not doing much and possibly#crashing the shit? no but i think she can understand his hesitation just a bit better in those final moments#also small headcanon is she knew he likley didn't cause the crash just due to how Jimmy talked of it and Curly being at fault because you c#even tell when Jimmy is avoiding the truth or lying in a lie and he was much to eager to constatnly talk down to Curly rather than wonder#why his closest friend would also do something like that much like Curly was confused and shocked Jimmy actually did it and she died knowin#Curly was at least innocent about that#anya mouthwashing#mouthwashing anya#curly mouthwashing#mouthwashing curly#captain curly#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#mouthwashing spoilers#suicide tw#tw suicide
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hey, have you ever thought about the fact that ian gets the courage to come out to fiona while sitting in his little twin bed? the same little bed he sits on to get ready on the morning of his wedding? to yank his fiance forward? to kiss him and promise him their future? hmm?
#thank you ray for: 1. letting me yell at you about this. 2. encouraging my insanity. and 3. for telling me to post it. lub u 💙#please don't mind the blurriness of this i can't possibly look at it any longer#shameless#gallavich#ian x mickey#ian gallagher#mickey milkovich
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"my my my... what do we have here?"
you shivered in fear at the gigantic being before you. you and your cookie friends had tried your best to seal the rift in the tree with white lily cookie. however, your actions proved pointless. white lily cookie's powers were still too weak and your time had run out. you all watched in horror at the towering cookie grinning down from above.
"it's been so long since we've seen new faces! we were starting to get bored being by ourselves in here..." shadow milk cookie smirked as he took a look at each cookie standing before him. when his eyes had reached you, his gaze stayed far more longer on you than the others. you trembled from his piercing stare, a small whimper escaping from your lips as you backed away and hid yourself behind pure vanilla cookie.
shadow milk cookie chortled at the pathetic display. "Oh, how I have missed the faces of fear from you cookies! Never gets old!" now that the rift had opened big enough for him to pass through, shadow milk cookie stepped out of the silver tree that had kept him and the others imprisoned for so long. the smaller cookies screamed in terror as they scrambled to get out of his way. every footstep he took practically shook the earthbread beneath their feet.
"pure vanilla cookie!" fear clouded your mind as you tugged your leader's arm in desperation. "what are we going to do?!" anxiety gripped your heart when he hesitated to think of a solution. one of the most powerful beings in all of cookiekind has just been unleashed and is ready to bring chaos to the world once more. just how on earthbread will any cookie be able to stop such beasts?
before pure vanilla cookie could even think of an answer, you cried out in alarm as you were suddenly lifted into the air. the other cookies screamed your name as you watched their forms grow smaller and smaller. you gasped as you were face to face with the grinning jester.
"what a cute little cookie you are." he eagerly examined you as if he were a child that had been given a new toy, turning you this way and that. "it's been ages since i had a little pet to dote on. you'll make a fine addition to my collection!" your mind raced as you tried to understand what you have just heard. a collection? a pet to dote on? what on-?!
your thoughts were interrupted as you heard a snap of... fingers? confused, you found yourself locked inside some sort of bird cage; the bars were thick enough to keep you from escaping. shadow milk cookie cooed as he watched you attempt to break free. "no-!" you tugged and pulled at the bars keeping you in.
"no! y-you can't keep me in here! Please!" you cried out to him in desperation. shadow milk cookie only giggled and shook his head, "ah, ah, ah! you're staying right by my side, my little cookie." you shuddered in fear as he began to summon his powers once more. shadows seeped out from your surroundings and from his body. multiple cold blue eyes stared at you and the cookies still down below.
"now, my dear..." with a clap of his hands, monsters of every kind stepped out from the shadows, ready to obey their master. with a manic grin, shadow milk cookie spread his arms out in grandeur to the cookies below. with a perfect view from above, you could only watch in horror as your friends were surrounded at every side by monsters of different sizes.
"let the show begin!"
#i believe in giant fallen heroes#just imagine them actually being much larger than normal cookies#anyway yeah i want to smooch the jester#this is short but i do plan on writing more; possibly make longer fics#just need some motivation aaaaa#not really a canon x self#but it could lead into it... hmmmmm#anywayyy enoyyyyyy :]#shadow milk cookie#cookie run#cookie run kingdom#shadow milk cookie x reader#crk#crk x reader#cookie run kingdom x reader#fanfiction#selfshipping
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Danny dies every night.
So! Danny's secret Ghost Powers remained a secret for about 6 Hours.
After turning back into a Human, he had immediately gone back to his room and tried to fall asleep, pretending none of it was even real, that it was just a dream. The idea that he had just died was understandably hard to swallow, not to mention the fact he had somehow come back.
All he wanted to do was rest and figure it out later. It was a problem for Future Danny.
Except when he woke up, something was wrong.
He felt Cold, Colder than he had ever been before. It was as if he had a chunk of pure Ice stuck in his Chest, the cold spreading across every part of his body. With a start he realized that his chest wasn't moving at all, either from the beating of his heart or the breaths he was supposed to be taking.
He wasn't breathing. His heart wasn't pumping. The Ice in his chest was the feeling of his heart not pumping, still and unnaturally cold. At that realization, he felt his Heart begin beating again.
He ran downstairs, hoping to get his parents help. He didn't know what was going on exactly, but they must be able to help him right?! They were the leading experts on Undead Biology, they must know how to help him!
When he reached the kitchen, he saw his parents and Jazz huddled together at the table, crying together for some reason.
"Mom! Dad! Jazz! Somethings wrong! I don't know what happened, but last night I-"
He stopped when he saw their faces. Their cheeks were tear-streaked, eyes bloodshot, but the thing he noticed first was the grief and absolutely confusion in their eyes. They were staring at him as if they had seen a Ghost, figuratively of course, and they seemed to he trying to connect the dots in their heads.
"Danny?" Jazz asked in a shaky voice. "Is that you?"
"Jazz?" He asked in return, "What do you mean, of course it's me?"
She looked hopeful for a moment, before his mom stood up.
"No." She said, her voice held a hard edge. "It's not."
Danny almost fell over when she said that. "W-what?" He asked, "What are you talking about Mo-"
"DON'T CALL ME THAT!" She yelled. She gripped the Blaster in her hand tighter, aiming it at him. "I checked everything when we found Danny's body! He had no Pulse, no Brain Activity, and his Ecto Levels were far higher than normal! Danny is Dead! And you killed him!"
"What?!" Danny yelled in shock, "I didn't kill hi-I mean, I didn't kill me-I mean-What are you talking about!?"
This time his dad answered, getting up from the table himself. In his hand was another Blaster. "Danny's Ecto Levels could only have been that high if killed by something with a large amount of Ectoplasm, enough to leave such a mark. The Portal was open for hours last night before we found it and sealed it up, and that's when you got through isn't it!?"
His Dad leveled the Blaster to him.
"No! I'm not a Ghost, it's me! It's Danny!?" He pleaded, "Mom, I always baked you a cake on mother's day! Dad, I helped you clean up the lab the last time you blew it up! It's me!"
"Nice try." His mother said, "Die again, Ecto Scum."
That day, Danny ran away from home.
...
Ever since that day, Danny had been running as far as he could from Amity Park.
After he got out of the house, he tried to find any place he could hide as he figured everything out. His first try was Tucker, but his parents had anticipated that and beat him to the Punch. The same happened when he tried to go to Sam's, he barely escaped that situation alive(?).
At first he tried to stay in Amity, hoping he would eventually find a way to convince his parents of his true identity, so everything could go back to normal.
He abandoned that hope about a week later, when his parents got the local authorities on their side and issued a public service announcement stating he was a Murderer who killed their son, and to contact the Police if anybody saw him. The mindless Ghost they captured and presented on the Local News cemented the publics view on him.
So he ran from Amity.
The first few weeks on the Run were the worst. He wasn't used to surviving on the street, much less evading the Law Enforcement that seemed to keep finding him. He had to constantly stay on the move to keep away from the pursuit of his Parents, the Police, and the weird guys in white suits who had shown up once he passed the State Border.
His new Ghost Powers were the only thing that had let him get away most of those times. He could turn into a Full Ghost whenever he wanted, unlocking all of his powers for the time being, but also seemingly sending up a Beacon to whoever was looking for him. He found it was much easier to use their weakened versions in his Human Form.
As for his Undead-ness, he had mostly figured it out. His body was lying to him. He was Dead, but his Body was just pretending to be alive for his own sake. He didn't need to breath anymore, and his heart didn't need to pump, but they did because he felt that they needed to. He probably didn't even need to eat anymore.
The problem was that it couldn't keep it up when he was asleep. No matter what, every time he fell asleep his Body would die again, and when he woke up he would have to make it Live again.
One of the main reasons he kept getting caught recently was because well-meaning civilians would report to the Police that there was a Dead Teenager under a Bridge, or on a Park Bench, or on one memorable occasion in a Ditch. He would wake up in a Body Bag, escape, and be reported to his Pursuers.
At least his pattern of movement was untraceable so far.
Turns out, the Portal's opening had much more of an effect than his parents had anticipated. The Shockwave in the fabric of Reality when they punched a hole through it (and him), had caused dozens of Natural Portals to form across the Country, opening and closing in random places, soaking the area of Ectoplasm.
As an apparent Ghost, Danny was somehow drawn to these places. Whenever he got to one he felt rejuvenated, as if the stress of the past few days had never happened to him. He could only assume that he was Absorbing the Ectoplasm in the area to feed himself, based on a few of the things he remembered from his parents constant ramblings.
Whenever he would go to one of these places, he would find a bunch of Ghosts. Some were friendly, defying all of his expectations, while others were...less so.
They seemed to resent the fact that he was still half-alive, some simply jabbing insults at him, others straight up attacking him. It seemed that Life was a sore subject among those guys. Or maybe it was him stopping them whenever they attacked humans...that was probably more accurate.
Sometimes the Ghosts he would meet were in the middle of attacking humans to fulfill what they called their "Obsessions". He learned that all Undead, and basically all Immortal Beings, have Obsessions. They are their Sole Purpose in existence, a built in defense mechanism against insanity by giving them something to dedicate Eternity to.
He didn't know if he had an Obsession, but if he did he hoped it was easier to manage than theirs seemed to be. One of them was obsessed with attention, but got it by hypnotizing humans into adoring her. She chilled out after a while. Another loved the thrill of the Hunt, but only wanted rare game. He chased after Danny a lot in pursuit of his "One of a Kind Pelt".
He fought then off and saved people whenever he could, although sometimes it was risky. Many of them were older and more experienced than him, so he was forced to use his Ghost Form against some of them, sacrificing his hiding spot to save the people being terrorized.
He sort of enjoyed it. Whenever he helped people, saved them from danger, he felt better about his situation. As if he was making the best out of the horrible situation his life had turned into by helping as many people as he could. He always felt a bit more motivated to keep going every time he helped anybody.
Maybe that was his Obsession? Helping others? He didn't really think so, he was nowhere near altruistic enough to consider that a possibility. Maybe it was Space? He always felt that same relief when he would camp out away from the Cities. Eh, he'll probably never know.
This cycle of finding a new hiding spot, getting discovered, and running away again continued for a while. Years even.
Danny had Died at 14. He was now 17, and had been homeless for 3 years.
He hoped this next hiding spot would last a bit longer than the previous ones. This one felt different, the Ectoplasm he was wandering towards felt older than the other places he had gone. His previous hiding spots had always been the site of a recent Natural Portal, and the Ectoplasm in the atmosphere would feel Fresh and Wild.
But the Ectoplasm where he was going tasted Older, Stronger, more Set in Stone than the others had. Wherever he wad headed to next, it had been soaking in Ectoplasm for far longer than any other place he had ever been, even in Amity.
He walked up the the Sign at the side of the road, introducing the City to newcomers.
"Welcome to Gotham City" it said.
#Dpxdc#Dp x dc#Dcxdp#Dc x dp#Danny Phantom#Dc#Dcu#Danny is Dead when he sleeps#Danny is immediately found out#Nobody Knows AU#For about 6 hours#Sam and Tucker weren't there to corroborate Danny's story#Danny is Homeless#The Fentons locked up the Portal after they found out a Ghost killed their using it#The Rogues have to find more roundabout ways into the Human Realm and spread across the country#Danny still fights them and still befriends some of them#He just happens to show up at the same Portals they are exiting at the time#Wonder why that keeps Happening? (Looks at a certain grandfather clock suspiciously)#Danny actually has 2 Obsessions#His Ghost Half has a Protection Obsession but it is stifled because he spends as much time as possible in his Human Form#His Human Form has a Space Obsession which he gets to indulge whenever he camps out away from Civilization#He gets found quickly tho without humans energies around to camouflage in so he can't do it too often#Danny goes to Gotham#The Ecto there feels older and more powerful so he hopes it will keep him hidden for longer#Meanwhile with the Fentons:#They think that the Ghost who killed their son is traveling to all these portals to absorb their Ectoplasm and grow his Power#All as part of some convoluted evil scheme to take over the world or something#Meanwhile with the Batfam:#They has been a string of Murders where the bodies share the same description and then disappears a few hours after discovery#And they seem to trace a Path that is leading directly to Gotham as the next location
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gift/commission for a relative, 15"x20"
#rug hooking#fiber art#artists on tumblr#tried rug hooking my signature in the bottom right#idk why that didn't cross my mind till now HAHA#another thing off the to do checklist#also me: can I cram in a tiny comic for that's vaguely merm related for mermay hjgfgkhjd#we'll see if I get to everything else first#this one's my fav in terms of texture/hand scrubbing hshsh#I think the horse body could be a weeeee bit longer +rump a little bigger#maybe made the purple less stark/more ombreish?#either possibly adjusted the purple or change the light green but happy with how it turned out#little nitpicks here and there haha
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shout out to the Japanese translation of the game confirming the order of Nyx's children as
the Fates
Charon
Moros
Nemesis
the Twins (Than and Hypnos)
Eris
Honestly doing the heavy lifting the other versions of the games can't really explain without it being out of place
#the Fates (hades)#Charon (Hades)#Moros#Nemesis#Thanatos (hades)#Hypnos (hades)#Eris (hades)#hades 2#hades II#hades II spoilers#was reminded of this cause I kept seeing fanart where Mel and Nem are both kids/teens and yeah no#unless Nem was keeping her appearance younger than her twin brothers#she was an adult for a while as Mel grew up#which is possible we don't know how long Nem was actually at the Crossroads pregame#that being said I could see Nem keeping a teenage appearance longer than necessary#cause who is more retributative than a teenager#but I can't really see her letting her aging be influenced by Mel the same way Than was with Zag#If anything I think Eris probably pulled a Than with Mel
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forgot to specify on firearm possession when he posted that job ad
#dimension 20#fantasy high#riz gukgak#fabian seacaster#this is the space sweepers AU thing I posted that one sketch for lol#I think trying to preserve riz's canon deal with guns in any AU is a noble&worthy cause#and I worried it wouldnt work in this one specifically. I shouldnt bc it doesnt matter but I do anyway bc of who I am#but also I shouldnt bc it works out fine lol. I think the juxtaposition/gap moe comes through#for context theyre in the far future of the year 2092 about#and the majority of the crew are deeply involved with contemporary tech. half of them got body mods. one of them's a robot#riz is the navigator (fabian's the first captain and the one assembling the crew). he does everything on paper with a pencil#he has a school calculator from our current time. the crew's had to wrestle a comm link onto him#his translator link has been mutilated to stop all wireless transmission. he is also under 5 feet in height and looks Like That#I think its great that he honestly coheres very well despite all appearances. in every life possible it must be wild that he owns a gun#and also the idea of fabian slowly waking up to the realization that he's somewhat responsible for a buncha babies is awesome to me#good luck buddy. hold out for two more years and labour court will no longer be on ur ass
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ed is absolutely panicking in 2x7 bc he’s seeing stede having the time of his life being a famous pirate and he’s genuinely happy for stede but also he wants out of this life and he’s afraid stede will choose piracy over him and so he’s leaving first before stede can leave him again, all of which is bc deep down ed still thinks he’s unlovable and he’s scared to get hurt by stede again and he’s handling everything very badly
all that being said
the fact that ed has already decided that he can’t choose piracy for stede’s sake is so important to me
piracy was slowly killing ed long before stede entered the picture. and now that ed’s decided that he wants warmth and food and orgasms and he wants to live he’s not going to force himself to do a job that makes him fucking miserable. he still might not think he’s worth love and not worth choosing, but he’s at least moved past thinking he deserves to die. he’s past making himself so miserable that he wants to die. ed still has a lot of work to do but he’s making good progress and i’m proud of him.
#ofmd#our flag means death#ofmd meta#ofmd s2 spoilers#ofmd s2#ofmd season 2#ofmd spoilers#edward teach#ed teach#edward teach born on a beach#blackbeard#txt#meta#mine#og#s2e07#idt it’s likely but i guess it’s POSSIBLE he’ll end up doing piracy a little bit longer w stede before retiring#but it’ll be like a very watered down version. they’ll make it their own thing#anyway ed’s mental health shit this season is hitting very close to home#not gonna get into it on tumblr dot com but let me just say. Oof.
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it's about...longevity? stability? it's about natsume believing he'll be somewhere long enough to plant flowers and see them bloom. it's about him taking touko seriously when she asks him to tell her what flowers he wants to plant. it's about making something with his own hands, building a future with the fujiwaras. it's about him repairing a rundown home for someone else, restoring it because it's beloved to them, because it's the home of someone they love. it's about him seeing touko's joy and thinking about the youkai saying we'd like to look upon her happy face forever. it's about the box garden making him think of the fujiwaras' garden and his parents' garden, about the flowers being both the memory of flowers that bloomed there before, and the flowers that he and the youkai planted earlier that day. it's about him waking up in both worlds with sensei. it's about touko finding the petal in his hair. it's about him feeling how he falls short and the youkai saying, but you have such gentle hands...
#watch this right after the ephemeral ones to die instantly. i assume. i haven't tried it#i feel like so many of the emotional beats that destroy me in this story come down to impermanence#accepting loss and change. finding the beauty in transience. treating every encounter as something precious‚ knowing it's ephemeral#and this chapter is about...also accepting renewal? allowing oneself to think about the possibility of love lasting#allowing oneself to put down roots. nurturing what is there. building foundations. doing it for and with people#god you know what else you shouldn't watch this after if you don't want to keel over dead probably. the childhood home arc#natsume can now think of the memory of sitting with his father looking at his mother's garden#and associate it with warmth instead of pain. because he's no longer afraid of losing it. because of the trust he has built#because he knows he can build something. the people here have made it safe for him and he has and he is and he will#i am crying so hard i should be collecting my tears for water reclamation purposes#natsume's book of friends#natsume yuujinchou#natsuyuu meta#my posts
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youtube
What ‘From the River to the Sea’ Really Means & Why Israel Can’t Win, w/ Vijay Prashad
#free palestine#israel#gaza#vijay prashad#worth watching just for prashad#he goes into the geopolitical context and implications of what's now happening in palestine#including the (possible end of?) saudi/israel normalizations#he also does a great job of explaining why the two state solution is no longer an option
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do you guys know how funny it’d be being in a polycule/throuple situation with zayne and sylus where you end up pregnant & they’re both seething with tension and banter about who the kid belongs to and the clownery is that you give birth to twins who resemble each man respectively
#so sorry to my peoples who dont like pregnancy content much but this is just . so hilarious#i refuse to keep this thought to myself any longer#i don’t even know if this is possible scientifically LMAO#sylus#zayne#love and deepspace#lads#love & deepspace#lnds#l&ds#sylus x reader#zayne x reader#sylus x you#zayne x you
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okay but literally what if buck and tommy end up together? like what if we get to see them moving in together or saying i love you for the first time or getting engaged or getting married? what if we get to see buck having a husband? literally what then...
#can i be honest the likleihood of bucktommy lasting to me is hard to figure out for me. i think some people saying bucktommy bonessssss#or whatever are saying it for the wrong reasons but there is truth to the idea that there is a very strong possibility that it doesnt last#longer than a season#not cause of buddie. just cause bad writing. this isnt a show where characters can really move forward a lot so#with bucks love interests especially they dont stick around and i am afraid we're gonna keep buck in that revolving door of love interests#with no end point. which is why i feel like some of those ppl should stfu about “god i hope they break up 😡” cause like.#are you sure? do you want that? no no not for you ship i mean like for this character completely independent of that ship. do you want that?#does that better his character in any way? does that further any development INDEPENDENTLY of the ship you want to happen?#okay rant over but like !!!!! what if it happens?? what if we get to see buck be happy and flourish in a relationship???#what then#bucktommy#firefly tag
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Curly not immediately punishing Jimmy for assaulting Anya is something I don’t think a lot of people are viewing in the complex context for Curly as the superior to both of them and closest confidante they had.
Like I am in no way saying he didn’t under react or fail Anya by not being harsh or direct with Jimmy but it really is the case that he really couldn’t. Imagine being stuck in such a confined space with very little areas to genuinely hold someone if they commit a crime. It’s not like this was an event that occurred before they departed or that they have easy communication with The Pony Express to ask for how to proceed when something like this arises. Not to mention, Jimmy’s relative power in relation to Anya as the co-pilot and second in command, he has the knowledge and access to do something to her had Curly directly punished him in this setting.
They were also Curly’s friends. It’s not just the case of him mediating something between his subordinates but people he is personally invested in don’t want to see spiral further in Anya’s case while also not wanting believe his friend go that bad in Jimmy’s actions. They were both suicidal and Curly putting Jimmy’s stability first is both out of bias but also the fact he’s aware at some level Jimmy is a danger to himself and others if not constantly placated. Combined with the fact he was in denial or just not piecing together what Anya said it’s hard to say what he buying time for and what he had treat as urgent. This isn’t even saying he doesn’t care about Anya but he’s not going jump to the worst conclusions about his friends even if part of him acknowledges the evidence saying so. It’s a complicated thing but he’s still human and needed to process it on top of trying to keep a ship that already took on a lot of water from further sinking, metaphorically.
I just personally think that while Curly failed Anya, it was a scenario where there wasn’t much he could do to the best thing by her safely and like Jimmy, we are underestimating what a good leader would do in a very fragile and tense situation like he was in. By the time he may have been ready and had a plan, things were much too late.
#like in my one Anya still respected Curly after he didn’t punish Jimmy so I assume he still respected her or reassured her he’d do something#it just was never enough because sadly Jimmy just needed to be removed from the ship and that’s not possible#cause no matter what Jimmy was going to do something stupid to fix it and Curly had to be thinking of a way to avoid that but also trying to#play the subjective role of friend and objective role of captain with two of the people he is currently closest with#not to mention how he’s a big picture guy and it’s not an excuse but those little detail and subtle behaviors are probably lost if the big#picture looks fine still and he admits he’d drive himself crazy trying to look for it#like weirdly Curlys character is only seen through the people he tried to protect and we judge him on his failures but we don’t get too much#on his insights directly as Jimmy is unreliable and he tries hard to be gentle with Anya#personal note is I don’t think Curly underplaying Anya’s trauma is a guy code protecting my bud thing but more a flaw in his personal#character in where he just wants everything and everyone to be ok in the end and taking responsibility that isn’t his to bare like he can’t#make up for what Jimmy did but he tried and that’s the problem really cause he’s just used to actually fixing it for him and it’s the case#this is the one thing he really couldn’t like I think he’s a good guy but he’s trapped in his and a bunch of other peoples worse moments#anya mouthwashing#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#mouthwashing curly#curly mouthwashing#mouthwashing anya#jimmy mouthwashing#captain curly#nurse Anya#mouthwashing spoilers#rape tw#suicide tw#also last thought is how he like also was being emotionally drained by Jimmy constantly like Anya and his relationship with Jimmy parallel#each other in such a way that both him and Anya warily follow the words of the others abuser because they fear the physical or emotional#repercussions if they don’t like her not being able to really tell curly what happened and then curly not being able to do the same and how#jimmy assaults and dehumanizes both when they are no longer a service to him like god they are more adjacent than Jimmy and Curly like Curly#messed up in a already messy pile Jimmy mad it into a dumpster fire in a landfill they are not the same
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