#anyway yeah i want to smooch the jester

[snail-noodle]

"my my my... what do we have here?"

you shivered in fear at the gigantic being before you. you and your cookie friends had tried your best to seal the rift in the tree with white lily cookie. however, your actions proved pointless. white lily cookie's powers were still too weak and your time had run out. you all watched in horror at the towering cookie grinning down from above.

"it's been so long since we've seen new faces! we were starting to get bored being by ourselves in here..." shadow milk cookie smirked as he took a look at each cookie standing before him. when his eyes had reached you, his gaze stayed far more longer on you than the others. you trembled from his piercing stare, a small whimper escaping from your lips as you backed away and hid yourself behind pure vanilla cookie.

shadow milk cookie chortled at the pathetic display. "Oh, how I have missed the faces of fear from you cookies! Never gets old!" now that the rift had opened big enough for him to pass through, shadow milk cookie stepped out of the silver tree that had kept him and the others imprisoned for so long. the smaller cookies screamed in terror as they scrambled to get out of his way. every footstep he took practically shook the earthbread beneath their feet.

"pure vanilla cookie!" fear clouded your mind as you tugged your leader's arm in desperation. "what are we going to do?!" anxiety gripped your heart when he hesitated to think of a solution. one of the most powerful beings in all of cookiekind has just been unleashed and is ready to bring chaos to the world once more. just how on earthbread will any cookie be able to stop such beasts?

before pure vanilla cookie could even think of an answer, you cried out in alarm as you were suddenly lifted into the air. the other cookies screamed your name as you watched their forms grow smaller and smaller. you gasped as you were face to face with the grinning jester.

"what a cute little cookie you are." he eagerly examined you as if he were a child that had been given a new toy, turning you this way and that. "it's been ages since i had a little pet to dote on. you'll make a fine addition to my collection!" your mind raced as you tried to understand what you have just heard. a collection? a pet to dote on? what on-?!

your thoughts were interrupted as you heard a snap of... fingers? confused, you found yourself locked inside some sort of bird cage; the bars were thick enough to keep you from escaping. shadow milk cookie cooed as he watched you attempt to break free. "no-!" you tugged and pulled at the bars keeping you in.

"no! y-you can't keep me in here! Please!" you cried out to him in desperation. shadow milk cookie only giggled and shook his head, "ah, ah, ah! you're staying right by my side, my little cookie." you shuddered in fear as he began to summon his powers once more. shadows seeped out from your surroundings and from his body. multiple cold blue eyes stared at you and the cookies still down below.

"now, my dear..." with a clap of his hands, monsters of every kind stepped out from the shadows, ready to obey their master. with a manic grin, shadow milk cookie spread his arms out in grandeur to the cookies below. with a perfect view from above, you could only watch in horror as your friends were surrounded at every side by monsters of different sizes.

"let the show begin!"

[gentlebeard]

hi lets show some love for our mutuals. tag your favorite mutuals and tell them why you love them

thank you, dear anon. time to spread lots of love:

@blakbonnet - what would i do without meow? she’s so smart & kind & funny & so fucking talented. writing, painting, making gifs, clowning - there’s nothing she can’t do. we have one and the same brain and often send each other almost identical messages at the same time. she’s my biggest fan and greatest supporter. team beard brought us together and now i never want to be without her!

@sherlockig - my soulmate, my sunshine, my rock. not only is she incredibly sweet and one of my best friends in the world, she’s also the backbone of the ofmd fandom. she graces our screens with fantastically edited screen caps of our beloved blorbos. we’d be lost if alexz didn’t put so much love and energy into picking the perfect frames! i’m so grateful for her presence in the fandom and in my life.

@saltpepperbeard - jodi. my wifey. my one true love. nothing brings me more joy than seeing her gifs or reading her insane tags on posts. they’re better and more entertaining than any newspaper or novel. every time she has an insanely brilliant (or angsty) thought, i wanna propose to her all over again. her writing makes my brain tingle in the best possible way. btw all of you are invited to our next wedding 🥰

@bizarrelittlemew - one day i saw one of ida’s gif sets and was like: hell yeah, i wanna see more of that. i came for the gifs but stayed for her love of rhys darby, her kindness, her writing, her amazing vibe, her creativity, and her lovely self.

@not-nervous-jester - jams is the hottest person on this hellsite. they’re just so effortlessly funny and amazing. their brain has the most wrinkles because they’re so fantastic and intelligent. i invite jams to make out with me regularly because i’m secretly (or not so secretly, i guess) obsessed with them. anyway, i’m smooching you and your brain, jams!

@skysofrey - kaitlin is the sweetest human ever. sunshine in a bottle. kindness personified. seeing her yellow hearts in the tags improves my mood instantly. she deserves to have a perfect day every single day.

@stedebonnets - another 10/10 human being. how anyone can be so sweet and supportive is almost unbelievable to me. ara will make you feel like the most special person on this planet with just a few words and sweet emojis. i bet ara’s hugs feel like coming home after being gone for years.

@dickfuckk - i once called josh the bts king because he’ll know or find anything that is just slightly adjacent to ofmd. his dedication to @ourflagmeansbts is insane to me. on top of that: nice & funny dude, hilarious videos, my dj archive 😌

@rainbowcrowley - after just casually communicating over tags we have finally moved our relationship to the next stage (dms & laughing about shitty memes about politicians, apparently). addi will tell you they make “mediocre gifs” but that’s just a blatant lie. their gifs always look fantastic. a very sweet bean.

@darkinerry - marlena will come out of nowhere and throw spectacular taika gifs into your inbox or just make a straight up insane gif set of that man with clips they probably had to kill someone for. idk how else they do it or where they get them, it’s a mystery to me. excited puppy energy 24/7.

honorable mention goes to olivia aka @snake-snack-stede who is, hands down, the most hilarious person in the ofmd fandom. i’m looking forward to your s2 shenanigans as much as the episodes!!!

if i didn’t mention you, know i still love you. and you’re amazing. 💕

[blindrapture]

FRIDAY JUNE 17TH, 2011 (Going Brazilian)

8:10 AM TOO FUCKING EARLY SHUT UP

3:27 PM That’s better. I’m all rested up. Four and a half hours left. Shit, this is gonna either be really awesome or really, really get me killed. Or worse.

4:52 PM Just remember, Jordan. It’s for Donnie. It’s for Donnie. It’s for Donnie.

5:21 PM Prog. Prog passes the time away quickly.

6:19 PM Taking the sharpest rock,you cut the titan loose from his bonds After all you have been through, you'll be damned if you fear the sea anymore Only takes several cuts, and the tentacles all withdraw from the trench "WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?" Down comes lightning Strikes the titan All of those tentacles concentrate on you now Steam vent opens beneath And you are dragged to Hell

7:57 PM Door’s knocking. Paul Blackwood, you put it best in “Lowest Point” when you wrote Ready to end, ready to dissolve into atoms that are no longer your own.Then again, you also put it best when you said Draw a stairway for my God to spite the sofa of my faith. Hahahahahaaa… it’s for Donnie, it’s for Donnie, it’s for Donnie. >.<

7:58 PM Miiistreeeeess! :DDD Do you mind if I write this stuff down? I mean, it is an historical moment, our first date and everything. O: "Of course! I'm flattered! And also hungry. Let's go." …yes, let’s. x_x;

8:32 PM "Wow, I like this place. My pet, I praise you for good choice in atmosphere." Well, you know me. ^w^;; Always trying to please. "I'd be blushing if it weren't for my perfect wooden skin. When do we get to eat?" That’s entirely up to you! You’re the boss. >w> …she leaned over the table and smooched me on the cheek. Then she snapped her fingers and now we have a puppet waiter. "I'll have the steamed lobster, and my pet will have a large pizza, with pepperoni, spinach, and anchovies." o: How do you know my favorite food? "Oh, I know everything about you." .....god I hope not. but I just smiled. :) The waiter’s gone off to fetch our food. …SO, Mistress. I know it’s not my place and everything, but c’mon, it’s a date! Can you tell me about yourself? What’s your name? :D "Well, as you've probably gathered, they call me the Harlequin. I don't want you ever using that name, though. My title fits your lips just fine. ..besides, 'Harlequin' is back from when I was just a puppet…" …Mistress, you were once just a puppet? o___o "I know what you mean; how could I ever be someone's puppet? How could I fall for someone who just wants control over me? Someone who doesn't actually love me for who I really am? I.. don't really know, sometimes. ...I just don't know." ...o_o;; "I guess I'd may as well tell you this. If you're really, like.. going to be in my life, if you actually want to be around me, I can.. trust you. There was once a Master. Once. Before he met me. Oh, he was the cock of the walk, he had everyone eating out of the palm of his hand, he commanded respect, and you wouldn't believe, I mean even if I told you you literally wouldn't be able to believe just how many powerful people there were who did all he said. Again, before he met me. I was just another one of his victims at first. He had no reason to keep me alive. I was nothing, I was just a fucking girl, do you know I'm not much older than you? But he saw something in me. I think I reminded him of someone he knew. I don't know, I never worked up the courage to ask him, I really don't think he'd have told me. But he kept me around. He had me work for him, killing many innocent people. And I gained the epithet 'The Harlequin,' much like your 'White Jester.'" Wait. Really??? "Yeah. Funny, how things go, isn't it? I killed people, I was feared for it, and my master's pride in me grew and grew until, one day, he and I were properly in love... kinda." Kinda? "Yeah... I mean, I wasn't like you. You're, like, naturally submissive, so you came to the Pet lifestyle quite easily. I was... I am... naturally dominant, it's who I am, it got me into a lot of trouble back in my.. old... life... and, anyway, I didn't like serving some big honcho. So I did a very nasty thing." Did you.. kill him? "I did far worse than kill him. I made him wish he was dead. I had help, one of his friends, a guardian angel... he backed me up, and we made that fucker pay, together. That night, that 'friend' visited me again and gave.. gave me... my wooden skin. Which makes me invincible. It makes me a goddess. And I'm... thankful!!" ...I.. don't think you are. "Not what? Invincible? We can go toe-to-toe, you can fight me if you dare, you'll see, nothing can kill me. Nothing can even harm me! Nothing gets in my way. Nothing stops Rosa Syclus." ..Rosa. o: "You are never, and I mean never to call me that. Never repeat it. That life is over now. I will rule forever!" Of course, Mistress. "You're a good boy. Thank you for all this." It's. ..it's fine. c: Our food's here!

9:13 PM That was a delicious meal, Mistress. (Even though I never directly saw you eat; every time you left my sight and I looked back, you’d just have less food.) "I agree. Oh, and I have a present for you!" Aw, a present? .w.; Really? What? "I think you'll love it." (…motherfucker, there’s Tiger Stripes!) May I? "I don't see why not. Here, play us a clickity-clackety song, young Springsteen!"

9:14 PM Now that I have Tiger Stripes, what do you say we play a game, Your Greatness? "God, you're just so cute when you're trying to propose ideas. I'd love to play a game." Well. It’s simple. If you can get Tiger Stripes off me, you win!

9:19 PM RUNNING KITCHEN The puppets aren’t in here. I guess Mistress is really enthusiastic about playing along. Okay, I know where to hide, but the B-4000k isn’t open. Fuck. C’mon c’mon c’mon open open open oh my god open OPEN MY GOD THAT WAS LOUD KAY, I’m ducking. In front of the oven, behind the table. I should be obscured from Mistress’ view when she comes in. …"I like this game; it’s like my pet is playing hard-to-get." fuckfuck she’s in the kitchen now shhhh "I could swear I heard the sound of a pencil scribbling on paper!" ..welp. “Oh, was that Tiger Stripes hitting a table? Oh, not just any table, that was thaaat table right there! I think I’m just about to dominate you, bitch.” Her giggles, oh my god here she comes “AH. There’s my bitch.” She’s coming, just gotta be ready to swing… “Maybe after I ram that guitar up your ass, you can choke on my hairy pussy.” Sorry, Harly.. but this time, *sunglasses* you’re going Brazilian. Swing DIRECT HIT OH MY GOD CLOSE CLOSE OVEN CLOSE CLOSE OVEN CLOSE CLOSE OVEN CLOSE RJK(AGDJ YES OHHHH MY GOD THAT WAS ACTUALLY A FUCKING BADASS ONE-LINER I SAID BURN, YOU FUCKING PSYCHO. BURN. BURRRRRRRRN. BURN IN HELL WITH THE REST OF YOUR FUCKING PUPPETS. I can hear her screaming, oh my god, that’s pretty… disturbing. x_x;

9:26 PM Okay, it’s been long enough. Time to get out of here. …that noise didn’t sound like banging. That noise sounded like lifting. Tiger Stripes, give me strength. ..oh! Hi, Mistress! I see you lifted the oven door from inside! And I also see that you’re kinda on fire! Like, wow, you’re hot! Literally! Hahah, I mean.. you’re not mad at me, are you? See, that’s.. how you win the game! You shove the other person in the oven! I’m running now BONES YOU TOLD ME THAT THING WOULD BURN HER THEN AGAIN NO YOU DIDN’T YOU JUST GAVE ME THE RECEEEEEEIPT

9:30 PM OUT OF THE KITCHEN OH GOD THE RESTAURANT’S FRONT DOOR IS BLOCKED BY FIRE WHERE THE FUCK DID THAT FIRE COME FROM MISTRESS IS BEHIND ME ..AND SHE’S ALSO MELTING OH MY GOD THAT’S PRETTY BADASS She’s scorching black and her paint’s dripping off and she looks pretty hot! …oh, kissing your ass won’t work this time? Fuck.

9:31 PM WAIT, can’t we just cuddle? :DDD …STUPID QUESTION YOU’RE ON FIRE STAY AWAY Okay okay okay okay what to doooo OKAY NEW IDEA THERE ARE TWO DOORS TO THE KITCHEN SEE YA

9:32 PM I think I made it to the restroom without her spotting me. I think. Oh god I’m actually pretty scared, this is the fucking Harlequin we’re talking about. I can hear fire approaching and paint dripping to the floor closer and closer. Oh god shhhh

9:34 PM She’s walking away. I think I actually fooled her. Oh my god. ..wait. She stopped. …SHE’S CHARGING THE DOOR HIDE

9:35 PM shh

9:36 PM ..she’s not moving. Oh god, I’m in a stall, this is just like when we first met. Do I dare look under? …go for it oh my god. OH MY god she’s bending over, looking at me, yep. Except her face is mostly missing, except for one eye, staring at me, glaring at me while dripping to the floor. And she’s on fire.

9:37 PM ..I do not want to look again.

9:38 PM Then again, we’ll be here all night otherwise. She’s patient. …o_e She’s now officially faceless. Still on fire. Three stalls away. …….o___e Two stalls away. …………o_____e RUNNING, STICKING OUT TIGER STRIPES SO SHE WON’T TRIP ME

9:40 PM OH MY GOD HIDING UNDER ANOTHER FUCKING TABLE IN THE KITCHEN SHHHHH

9:42 PM She’s not saying anything at all and it’s really fucking creepy. She’s just melting. Slowly. I think, if I just avoid her for now, I’ll be good.

9:43 PM I HAVE AN IDEA I’ll whack her with Tiger Stripes again. Maybe, since she’s melting, she’s weak against it or something! C’moooon, Tiger Stripes. C’mooon Tiger Stripes. BATTER UP

9:44 PM …..o_____e I, uh.. well.. Tiger Stripes destroyed her wooden skin, alright. Now it’s shattering like a big piece of glass. And now esgjk9fb.. ..asrjgwemiefwmiefiwe. mwirIW$wrwirein! D: It’s Rosa Syclus. At least, what’s left of her after all these years of puppetry. She’s.. I mean, the wood’s gone, and the fire stopped with the wood. So now it’s just Rosa. And me. She’s in a dark-crimson dress. She’s a ginger. Freckles. And, well, okay, she’s more of a corpse than anything else, a living corpse. Except her eyes aren’t anything like any zombie I’ve ever seen. Her eyes are conscious and calculating. There’s no rage in those eyes, no impatience, no desire to rush and catch her prey, even though I’ve just been standing here like a sitting duck, writing for a while now. ..she’s put a hand on her hips. She knows I’m writing down her appearance. I don’t think she’s just creepy, journal; I think she’s a deductive genius. I think she can tell everything about you just by looking at you. Like Sherlock Holmes, but better, ‘cause she’s a dominant fucking girl! She’s just in the crimson dress. Nothing else. I think. …she just flashed me her naked crotch; yeah, she’s both wearing nothing else and she’s a deductive genius. And much hotter under the wood. ….no, Jordan. Don’t think about how hot she is, nor how brilliant and respectable she is. She’s a psycho. She’s a psycho. She is a psycho. Remember how she’s been forcing sex on you all this time? ”Forcing sex.” There’s a word for that, Jordan. Okay, Rosa. I don’t know what you’re planning, but right now I’m after one thing and one thing only. Revenge. You’ve caused too much trouble and I’m talking too much THIS IS FOR DONNIE! Rjsdgguig BEING SAT ON IS ACTUALLY PRETTY ENJOYABLE RIGHT NOW

9:50 PM RAGH BEING UNABLE TO GET FREE IS ALSO VERY LOVELY BUT I REALLY NEED TO.. GET GOING. …FJK(FEAJKEA MKI FUCK. FUCK. F(JICJI FUCK! ..RAGH OH MY GOD THAT WORKED SHE'S MUCH LESS HEAVY WITHOUT THE SUIT GOTTA RUN

9:52 PM KAY KITCHEN HIDE shh OH HI YOU’RE SMART I FORGOT OH GOD

9:53 PM FREEZER, slammed door shut, holding it shut, cold in here, fuck. This is pretty intense and terrifying. But if she was able to find me that easily then… What if she’s known I was planning this all along? Fuck. What if I really can’t kill her? How do you stop someone who’s fucking invincible? …I think I’ve got an idea.

9:55 PM Okay, this is gonna be extremely dangerous. And risky. But I’m gonna risk it. This time, I’ll write out the fucking plan before I do it so I don’t write during the action. Okay? Okay. So the plan is to open the door and get her to run in here, then for me to run out and slam the door shut and move something in front of the door. Then she can either freeze to death or for all eternity. Okay, kicking the door down in 3, 2, 1, GO

9:56 PM FFFFFF RHA HEY FUCK YUP GOTCHA TRAPPED OH MY GOD. …HOLY FUCK, DONNIE!

10:00 PM Donnie’s holding the door shut; I’m running to get something to keep the freezer shut with. …how heavy’s the oven? oh my god, why was this so expensive, even I can move it. I’ll move it in front of the door anyway.

10:01 PM Donnie and I are relaxing now. Rosa’s banging on the door. I haven’t heard one peep out of her since I set her on fire. Donnie’s shouting at Rosa, saying how we’re not afraid of her anymore. “We’re not afraid of being under your control, because we’re smarter than we look.” …Rosa’s stopped banging. Is she crying? o_o;

10:15 PM We decided to wait another fifteen minutes before we started moving out. Y’know. Just in case. Now we’ve left the restaurant. Over the fifteen minutes, I filled Donnie in with as much as I could. She can read this journal if she wants the full story, anyway. Donnie says she’ll fill me in on her story later, but the important part is she wanted to risk coming back a day early, so she entered a rabbit hole on the way back. I thanked her so much for it.

10:19 PM Donnie wants to stop by the house we’ve been staying at one last time.

10:34 PM Donnie’s telling me to come upstairs; there’s something she needs to show me.

10:36 PM Oh. :D Right. The promise I made before she left. Well. The puppetry is over, so maybe the genuine emotion can really begin? In the meantime, goodnight, journal. You’ll always be my first love. ;D …note: Donnie, if you ever read this, don’t kill me please.

(Attached: see following log.)

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[naffeclipse]

So, about that specialty as a fanfic writer post! I've been thinking about it a bit and wondering what to say that isn't just repeating all my gushing I've already done about your writing in general, but then I realized the post says fanfic author specifically so I'm gonna focus on just that! (thinking about fanfic as its own kind of genre in a way, even though definitions like that can get pretty complicated on what constitutes what but I digress and it's just the start of the ask fkjghskjdgh)

So anyways! I think your specialty as a fanfic author, regarding what I know about fanfic, the communities, and all the shapes it can take, is the construction of a story and the way you put the characters of the source material in it. And I know this might sound pretty general for fanfic (your writing is so good in general after all XD), but I'd explain it like this:

You are incredibly good at creating a world, a plot, with its own rules that might be completely different to the source material, and yet the way you build the characters is very recognizable. Of course when it comes to Sun and Moon, there really isn't that much that canon offers to us, but the few aspects that we do have, the fandom has kept secure and transformed, analyzed, subverted and played around with them to create many wonderful scenarios! And I just absolutely love the way you play with all of them! And not just Sun and Moon! You clearly know a lot about fnaf in general and you apply that to make the AU you are working on all the much richer! The way afton is always this looming evil figure, in whatever version you are using (glitchtrap or the man himself), how you have had different versions of Vanessa, from a vicious antagonist, to a friend trapped by the circumstances (just like it's up to interpretation in the games!) and how there is also glimpses to such a wider story whenever you mention characters like Michael or Charlie, or even Freddy.

But then you are also very good at sticking to your plot! Fanfic is, of course, a medium to have fun and exploring all sorts of branches to a story is fun (and you do that a lot in your blog too, which I absolutely love and will always be excited about!), but when it comes to a world you have planned, the specific fanfic you are writing, I'm just so impressed how you can choose what to focus on, and while you imply things, you know what is relevant to the story you want to tell, and how to stick to it, even though worldbuilding about all the rest of the source material tends to be very tempting, but might not be what the story requires from a technical standpoint. Again, I feel there's no wrong way to go about fanfic! It's just the method you use is very, like, precise? And for what you want to achieve i'ts just perfect! You figure out what your structure is, what your plot needs, and the fun thing is that if we wonder about the rest, what goes beyond the story or little details you feel might not be able to be included, we can still send asks about them! So it's not like it's lost or anything. You have your beginning, your middle and your end and you nail them every time! It's so cool!!

So yeah! I think your specialty as an author of fanfic in particular, is your way of figuring out what you want to do with your story, structuring and building it really well, and knowing how to make the characters fit the world while maintaining all those little references to canon, no matter how different the world is to the source material!

Sources (aka fanfics I had in mind while writing this XD): Deep Dreams, Sleuth Jesters, and Cryptid Sightings.

Chaotik, I've been rereading this over and over and I am completely melted. I'm just a puddle now, thank you ♥ You are so sweet and kind, ahhh! I'm gonna smooch you on your head *smooch*

[sillyjesterart]

Jester omfg I think I hauve covid... who let him show torso... u tellin me u get to smooch THAT every day? Mad jelly... but then again, u DID say we could share him, so... uhh yeah he's all covered in lipstick stains now sorry bout that, it should come right off. He needs to shower anyway, he was STEENKY

(oh btw, I think Stun's romance repulsion gets triggered by your selfship posts, and I always tag anything I feel he wouldn't want to see with "not for stunfiskz," we talked a bit ago and I made that tag and he blocked it so they'd automatically be filtered on his end... not saying "you gotta use it to," it just genuinely occurred to me that others could use the tag too, so maybe consider it, idk, I just worry about Stun a great deal and don't want to risk upsetting him... ugh, the poor boy)

Omg I feel so bad now, I obviously didn't know but still. I'll make sure to use that tag from now on! I don't want to make anyone uncomfortable at all with my content and I do apologize if I did for him.

I would also suggest for him to block out "selfship" tag in general if that helps any! Again I do apologize for all that.