#but she burned out. she did shitty things. she really hurt people and people he cares about no less
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faebriel · 2 years ago
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calling out sick bc i thought about niki finding the tnt underneath the podium on nov 16 and quietly replacing the dirt that covered it again
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nemesyaaa · 3 months ago
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do revenge // mean!rafe cameron x camdoll!reader
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summary ; you were tired and sick of the hell life the well-known kook prince give you. so after being for so long his favorite victim, you decided to fight back.
warnings : dark content. insecurities. revenge plot. bully!rafe. poker face!rafe. sick behavior and toxic attitude. smut. oral(m. receiving). dollification. blackmailing. dubcon. shitty kooks behavior. bad thoughts. quickly mentions of some kinks. self-justice. pogue/kook hate/unfair dynamic. free hate. masked reader. threatening. power imbalance. baddie attitude. minors dni. please, be careful with the warnings.
author's note : the girl on the gifs is not a faceclaim, it's only to show what kinda mask she wear. it's the first time i think i do something like that so......and it's a one-shot, so it's maybe a little too long 💀
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you worked as a waitress in a small restaurant. you hated this job but you had to make money and today the place was a little empty so you thought you could relax but that was before Rafe showed up with his gang of kooks. you had started shaking as soon as you saw them. you felt so small and trapped, your breath sped up. there was like a lack of air in your lungs because you knew how rafe was with you, how much he hated you but above all, how much he loved to humiliate you. it was his favorite pleasure: being cruel to you. and damn, he knew how to hurt you better than anyone. he must have broken so many things in you, your ego, your heart, your self-esteem, your confidence, your joy of living that you wondered how you were still standing in his presence.
with a tense smile, you approached them because you also couldn't escape the group. you hugged your notepad to your chest, pressing tightly the page against your breasts. you were about to open your mouth when rafe cut you off.
“i understand better why this restaurant is so empty…” he commented, looking you up and down. “ but what i don’t get is why you haven’t been fired yet when you’re scaring customers away.”
“apparently not everyone since you're here...." that was what you wanted to answer but you preferred to kill yourself rather than make a remark to rafe that was going to cost you your life. and you wouldn't want to give him this pleasure.
“have you chosen what you want? ” you said, addressing everyone, preferring to ignore the leader of the kooks group.
“it’s so cheap here. ” he had commented. “ very cheap. ” from his insistent look, you understood that he was including you in his criticism. he was very childish.
you nervously tighten your grip on your pen. of all rafe's friends, topper seemed the most sensitive to what you were going through but he always stayed quiet. this idiot finally ordered cocktails. the words had to be ripped out of his mouth.
when you came back with the drinks, you delicately placed them on the table. you were embarrassed by the way rafe stared at you like you had something on your face, like he was planning another nasty remark. and it didn't take long, because the next minute, he had managed to make you cry and made everyone laugh.
when you handed him his glass, he purposely knocked it to the ground.
“what are you waiting for, pogue? clean it. it's not like it's new to you, you're used to cleaning up other people's shit. "
burning tears started to come out of your eyes, you bit your trembling lip. your throat was tight, and you hated everything you were feeling right now. the shame, the humiliation, the fear, it destroyed you.
you brought something to clean before bending down. he hadn't apologized. he never did it anyway. you kept all this grudge inside of you, even if it killed you.
he picked up your rag with a smirk. “you don't need that when you can use your tongue. ”
you looked at him with wide eyes, as if you had heard wrong. topper had intervened before you did. “hey dude, no need to go that far.”
“shut up, topper. i really need to show you that all women are fucking dirty and disgusting sluts. so stop protecting them, and watch the show i put on for you. and for free. ”
"rafe...listen..." you said softly.
“you better listen to me if you don't want to be fired. you know how good i am at making your life hell.” you started to kneel down, bringing your face closer to the ground. “yes, you understand very easily, maybe you can show your ass to the camera too. record it, kelce. lick it well, sweetheart. don't want to see your ugly face on the screen. “
this day was the last straw. it was worse than anything. it was completely degrading and nasty.
and it was surely at that precise moment, that night to be exact, that everything had changed in you. that you had decided that this couldn't last, that you had to play into the enemy's game to defeat him, that sometimes you had to be unfair when he cheated, that when someone was bad, you had to be tougher and stronger.
it had been several years that you had endured criticism from rafe and kooks about your physique, your pogue condition, that your face was the center of mockery and the worst jokes, that it lasted to the point that you had surely become the funniest joke or meme in the island.
but you had grown up. you had prepared your revenge over several months. because you couldn't pretend it didn't affect you. but all the hatred you had felt for yourself had started to turn towards rafe, to give you a reason to live, a purpose because he had given you a furious and crazy idea.
he had humiliated you. and he was going to taste his own medicine.
deep down, you weren't just doing this for yourself but for all the pogue girls who had suffered harassment from kook boys, for all the girls who had received bad treatment because they didn't look like princesses, for all the girls who were made to believe that they deserved nothing because they did not meet the physical standards. you had to put an end to this nonsense.
so after five months, you had become what rafe loved the most. you had become a very popular online camdoll for kooks. you wore a mask that hid your facial identity enough to not be recognized. you had a completely different style. you were surely prettier, more magnificent in his eyes. because he had fallen into the trap. he had this slightly superficial side. you knew you had succeeded from the moment you felt the difference. not only did he want you, but he wanted to possess you.
he was one of your loyal viewers. he didn't have his first name as a username but you knew it was him. his messages had the same tone as when he spoke to you.
he was pathetic, because he paid to see your content, to talk to you, to hear you touch yourself, to do dirty things to you. no matter how much you charged.
he even sent you a video of him jerking off on one of your lives. you couldn't lie, you had watched the entire video. his fist was wrapped around his painfully cock, moving up and down, the leaking tip disappearing and appearing with the speed of his thrusts, the way his boner grew bigger the more he thought of you. he was going so fast that his bulge was literally slapping against his hand with a loud, obscene noise, his sagging balls moving in rhythm. his hair was messy, there was a quiver in his lips every time he made a grunt. “ fuck...fuck...fuc'...gonna fuck that dollface one day...gonna get this dick all in your dumb pussy. ” his length was very feverish and at the same time hard, shaken with spasms. the veins pumped by his strokes. he had come in such a short time, loads of cum exploding all over his sweating chest. he had wiped everything with a pack of tissues. and just when you thought the video had come, he started again.
you never responded. only downloaded the video and stored in a confidential folder.
but one day, he spoiled you a little too much. however, you weren't doing anything really crazy. you fulfilled clients' requests — which involved masturbating with a vibrator, playing with your breasts while riding a dildo, putting as many fingers as your viewers wanted in your pussy, letting them dress you however they wanted, letting them make you crazy stupid and vulnerable, doing little shows and hauls until you end up naked, playing with the food on your body, recording your orgasms, filming you when you slept naked or took a shower.
you had decided to thank rafe for his expensive gifts by asking him to come to your house. you had a studio that you had decorated, enough to make him believe that you lived well, and that you could be a kook. obviously, he had accepted and of course, he was hoping for sex when you told him you had a surprise for him.
it was, he was going to have sex. and you a revenge.
rafe had always assumed that he hated you, the shitty, ugly pogue, that he would never sleep with you. and to quote his own words “even for a million, i could never fuck such a disgusting thing. ” and it was always in public, in front of people. then you were going to do the exact same thing. you were going to fuck with him, and if he loved show that much, he was not going to be disappointed.
on the day, you had prepared yourself for the occasion. while you were getting ready, there were tons of flashbacks in your head, scenes, words that kept coming back. all this cruelty that could make you vomit.
“i really thought alcohol would help me find you attractive but no, you're still just as ugly. i thought it was a pogue thing baby but actually it's just you. ” it was rafe.
“ i felt like i had hit you in the face ten thousand times with my golf ball. ” it was still rafe.
“the difference between you and the other pogues? is that you angel, you will never be able to hide the fact that you are one. all the misery shows on your face. ” always rafe.
and it was each time heavier, more hardcore. he reminded you of your condition, but also of how much he couldn't see you. you were too horrible. you never told anyone about this treatment, about all this hatred. but you had now learned, from the best, how to make noise.
you wiped away your tears, and brought the mask to your face. “i can do it. ” you muttered to yourself as you began to get slightly anxious. you were afraid of breaking down in the middle of the act, of finally not being sure you wanted all of this. you felt mixed feelings. was it really good to do that, was it really right? but on the one hand, what had justice done for you until now? absolutely nothing. like everyone else, she had watched you get humiliated. so it was just common sense?
the door to your studio rang. you opened it. you couldn’t lie that rafe was really handsome and smell good. but the first thing you noticed was his smile.
he was completely different. you could see in his eyes for the first time, something positive towards you.
" welcome. ” you said with a smile, inviting him inside.
oh he resisted the urge to kiss you, his hands were in his pockets but they were nervous and unsteady. they wanted to be on you.
“do you want to drink something? ” you added the name of the cocktail he always had at your restaurant. you had done it on purpose but he hadn't noticed. he nodded.
“are you going to take off your mask one day? ”
“without it, i am no longer what i am. so it's better that i keep it. isn’t that all you want me to be? a doll. ”
“no, you’re right. then at least i know you're not a fucking pogue. ”
“it would be bad for your reputation too. i already see the headlines and the taunts "rafe cameron fucks a pogue" and people will laugh at you, and you hate it being humiliated. no one likes it. ”
“you look really nice, doll. i mean, kind.” he replied.
“i am but i believe that some people. ” you pressed the word, and gave him an honest look. “have abused a lot of this part of me. that's why i'm a doll, i don't have to feel anything, just do what people want me for. you can fulfill your every desire with me. do you want to see me in a certain dress? let me change. do you want to release your anger in me? let me help you. do you just want to fuck me? i am literally made for this. ”
“you are made for me. ” you smiled through the mask because in a way, he was right. he had created your character.
“do you mind if i film? i really want to record this. you are the first customer I have met. it's special for me. ”
" no. at least people will know to who you belong. ”
“that’s exactly it. ” you lied when starting the live. “let’s get started. ”
you had removed his pants and his boxers, placing yourself between his thick tighs, he was so much bigger than you that you looked like a small caged thing.
you placed your outrageously manicured hands on his open legs, your mouth sinking and wrapping around his hard cock. your tongue had started rolling around the girth, you could feel the small drop of precum going down your throat. this part that he was soon going to get fucked strongly and hard.
you wanted to drive him crazy, see him sweat like a pig because you were so good, because you did it all too well. he had wrapped your hair in a grip to make it easier to pull on it. “yes...suck that cock...just like that...let me ruin that mouth...fuck…”
your dripping lips were stretched by the size of his length, and the way it was getting completely hard inside of you. you could feel the drool running down the sides of your mouth. you felt every inch of his penis fucking your throat. and through your mask, you saw his smirks. he pulled your hair, and you took all of him, until your face came into contact with his pelvis, every bit of him was in you. you almost gagged.
he had barely pulled out of you before he entered you again. his cock worked against your tongue, brushing it harshly, the tip tapping the back of your throat. your cheeks were sunken, and your lips drowned between spittles and saliva. “you're perfect, doll...you really know how to suck...i could really take advantage of the situation if you keep this up...” at his words, you sucked him faster, pumping efficiently while his hand stroked your hair. his fingers moved along with your head.
he was completely using you, doing whatever he wanted with you. and you let him do it, because you wanted him to be proud of himself and to be seen on camera. he had pushed his cock onto your mask, decorating it with saliva, your own currently drooling. “so pretty. ” he had commented. he pushed his cock back into your mouth without warning, taking it ever deeper. you felt fizzy. your lips were open and used for several minutes non-stop, your throat puckered and pummeled. your jaw was starting to hurt, but you didn’t show it. you had to be perfect, packaged the way he wanted. your tongue flickered around him, teasing his girth.
“ need to be inside you...so bad...you make me feel so good. it's your face, doll. you're divine.”
maybe he had a mask kink to say that, to also be turned on by a fucking plastic object. or maybe it was the face he imagined behind it all? you didn't know.
he had thrown you on the bed, opened your legs in two and pushed your body against his hips, pulling you by the waist. his cock had twitching, purring some pre-cum, at the contact with your soaked cunt.
“ i could never sleep with a pogue. but especially with you, just thinking about it makes me vomit. “ it was perfect that you remembered that in the moment, as he thrust into you, his hips moving slowly.
your pussy clenched around his cock, barely letting him move without hurting you. “ fuck, you're so fucking tight, doll....need me to stretch this pretty little cunt. i'm gonna make you so dumb. “
you couldn’t hide that you still got wet, and damn, he knew how to fuck and you couldn’t be his first time. he had started pounding into you once your pussy had started to ease around him.
it was really intense, his body slamming violently against yours, the strike echoing through the room. your weak moans but which he heard very clearly, and which encouraged him to go even further within your walls. he pushed himself even more to hear you scream. he had a goal and he wanted to make you so stupid that in the end you wouldn't be able to do anything.
he buried himself inside you, his powerful thrusts stretching your pussy, your body twitching beneath him. he was on top of you, staring into your eyes. you were a little fascinated. his shoulders were broad and muscular, his arms heavy and toned, and his abs were perfect arranged into six packs. his hair fell on his forehead.
he couldn’t see the emotions on your face, nor clearly define what you were feeling. he only had your voice and the reactions of your body.
your pussy hugged him with each strokes, he filled you completely, making his way to your spot. your puffy slit was spread, capturing his bulge. you squeezed him harder, he startly getting down, the wet and dirty sounds of his hips rocking your body. you could see the vein on his neck, his contracted muscles covered in sweat.
he had placed his lips on yours, his mouth kissing yours. you wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him closer to you, gently guiding the kiss with your tongue.
he continued to fuck you, while playing with his tongue in your mouth, kissing you without limits, until your lips and jaws were covered in drool. you waited for him to cum inside you. but he hadn't pulled out while you were flooded, loaded with his cum, and some orgasms you'd had. it dripped from your slit onto the sheets. he had placed the tip of his cock back in front of your entrance, picking up where his enjoyment had left you off.
this time it was a little gentler. it was like you had established a little intimacy even though you knew it wasn't true. after a few minutes, he stopped.
" are you always being that kind ?…”
“ you think i'm a mean person ? ”
“ you never hurt people ? never in your life ? ” you asked him, with a friendly tone.
“ what if ? ”
“ don't freak out. everyone has a mean side. now, you got me curious. can you tell me the worst thing you have done to someone ? ”
“ maybe it was to one of that trashy pogue…” it started, and you forced yourself to not react when you saw the smile on his face. even after years, it didn't regret anything. because obviously, he talked about you.
“ thank you for confessing this story to me. now, i have a gift for you…” you said with a fakely soft voice. “ it was not the sex part. i'm willing to let you see me without my mask. i really want you to see me because i trust you. ” was obviously a lie.
“are you sure? ” he was so surprised by your proposal. “ don't you want to tell me something worse you did to someone too ? ”
“ oh, it's part of the gift, rafe . ”
at this moment, he knew. he fucking knew.
he had removed your mask.
because of the shock, he took a step back.
his face was indescribable.
“oh no, you can't pretend to be disgusted, not after fucking me like you've wanted this your whole life. ” you smiled. “what did you say before? that you could throw up? liar. you came so hard in me. and, it is still dripping. come on, don't run away, give a closer look. maybe i should make you clean the mess you made with your tongue. like you did to me. maybe, this time you will vomit. but i'm not sure, you're such a pathetic hater. and i'm just not afraid of you anymore. ”
“what the fuck is wrong with you, pogue ?! did you have fun?”
“ pogue ? ” you mocked. “ was babydoll, sweetheart, a few minutes ago. now, it's pogue ? how it feels, rafe ? how does it feel to be humiliated ? i think, it's better for you to apologize for all these years. but not only for me, for every pogue. ”
a crazy laugh escaped his lips, as he came closer to you. “ really ? what make you feel that i will apologize ? especially to you. ”
“ because now, the game is over. it's a war and i'm gonna fight back. it means, i will drag you down. every secret, every weakness, every move that you want to hide from me will be from now my first concern. i'm glad that you hate me because it's only the beginning. ”
“ you really think that you have some power over me ? be serious. ”
“ it's not about power at all. it's about justice. ”
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i also wanted to thanks @bunnyrafe @rafecameroninterlude and @bimbotrashcan who helped me a lot, and trusted me for this !! tysm, i'm very grateful <333
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feyhunter78 · 9 months ago
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Jealously, Jealously
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Couldn’t find a fanart I felt fit so have a gif!
Nerd!Miguel Masterlist
You’re not jealous, you can’t be jealous, because Miguel isn’t yours. You’re friends, study buddies, lab partners, platonic, platonic, platonic, so why do you feel so shitty watching him and this random girl—Ava she said her name was—flirting?
Maybe it’s because she’s flipping her long silky black hair over her shoulder, batting her thick naturally dark lashes up at him, laughing at his jokes with a laugh that sounds like music, and Miguel’s eating it up.
You’ve never seen Miguel so confident, and it hurts. You’ve been friends with him for ages now, and he’s never been so forward, so clearly sure of himself when he’s with you. He’s talking, leaning down to hear her better, letting her touch his arm, his chest, even his fucking neck.
You stew in silence, arms crossed, watching them from your place behind the Sig Epp letters.
You were supposed to be getting lunch, walking, and talking with Miguel, only stopping to say hello to Brett, but then this Ava girl showed up and all of a sudden, she and Miguel have to speak privately.
“What’s got you all heated?” Brett asks, bumping his shoulder into yours, joining you against the low wall, behind the giant painted letters.
They’re what four-five feet tall, painted in the Sig Epp colors, made of plywood and some other material you don’t really recognize, and don’t care to. They’re good to hide behind, and that’s what you’re doing.
“I’m not heated.” You tell him, rolling your eyes when Ava playfully squeezes Miguel’s bicep, her laugh ringing out through the courtyard.
“Tsst, ouch.” Brett says, jerking away from you dramatically, acting as if touching your shoulder burned him.
“You’re not funny.” You deadpan, averting your eyes from Miguel and onto Brett.
“I’m a little funny.” He says, “remember when I got Dr. Blevins to do that TikTok trend with me?”
“The one where you tried to guess which of the other professors in the department he hated?” You snort, turning to face him, leaning against the sun-bleached bricks.
It was pretty funny, Dr. Belvins wasn’t the nicest man on the planet, but who would’ve known he had such a hatred for Dr. Vervid? Though you shouldn’t be too surprised, there weren’t many people who liked the Organic Chemistry professor.
“See I’m funny.” Brett says, wriggling his eyebrows victoriously.
“You did one funny thing.”
He presses a hand to his heart. “You wound me y/n, truly, down to the deepest chasm of my very soul.”
“Alright, Shakespeare,” you laugh, “time to phone it in.”
Brett takes an exaggerated bow.
You roll your eyes but giggle. Brett is a goof, and while usually you find it all a bit ridiculous, it does the trick, the uncomfortable emotions you’re feeling lessen.
“No, but seriously, you seem upset, is everything alright?” Brett’s voice takes on a more serious tone, and he gives you a sympathetic smile. “I know we’re not close like you and Miguel, but I do consider you a friend, and if I can help, I’d like to.”
Are you crying? You think you might cry. “Shut up, why are you being so nice to me?”
“I’m a nice guy, not like that, an actual nice guy, a nice person.”
You sigh and roll your neck, letting it hang to one side as you look at Brett. “I think I might be jealous?”
“Oh, of Miguel and Ava? Yeah, I see them hanging out sometimes, she’s hot.”
Gut punch.
“You’ve seen them hanging out?” You dig your nails into your palm to try and keep the emotion out of your voice. Thankfully it works.
“Sometimes, used to see them hanging out before you two got close, but it’s picked back up recently.” Brett says, casting a surprisingly subtle glance over at the dark-haired pair.
Double gut punch.
“Oh…cool.” You reach for your phone preparing to either hide in it or text Miguel and tell him you have to miss lunch, either way you’re pretty sure you’re going to start crying.
Brett snaps to attention and reaches out to put a hand on your shoulder. “Shit, y/n, I didn’t even—I’m sorry.”
“No, no, Miguel and I are just friends, I don’t care who he hangs out with, it doesn’t matter to me.”
Totally doesn’t matter that he defended you against Kron, that he said he wanted to have a daughter with you. That you almost kissed, that he’s coming with you to the semiformal, that you eat lunch together every day during the week, totally doesn’t matter.
“Oh well...I don’t think they’re dating or anything, Miguel isn’t like that, he wouldn’t…” He rubs the back of his neck sheepishly. “He’s not the kind of guy to lead someone on.”
“I said we’re just friends. Bye Brett.” You snap, shoving your phone back in your pocket and readjusting your backpack as you speed walk in the opposite direction of Miguel. Hoping fervently that you can make it back to the Humanities Building, then to the parking lot, before he notices you’re gone.
Of course, you have no such luck, and you can hear Miguel calling out to you, then your phone lights up in your hand.
“Hey.” You say, keeping your voice calm.
“Y/N, where are you going, I thought we were getting lunch?” His voice is so sweet, so concerned, and you hate him for it.
“I forgot my next class was canceled, and I have a big essay coming up, I’m just going to go home and work on it.” You lie, digging your car keys out of your backpack.
“Oh…okay…” You can picture him, standing there all alone, looking down at his feet, clutching the strap of his backpack protectively, his voice thick with disappointment.
You hate yourself for feeling guilty, but then you remember he’s not alone, he has Ava.
“Just go eat lunch with Ava, you guys seemed pretty cozy, don’t let me interrupt.” You can’t stop the venom from dripping into your voice.
“Interrupt? Y/N, you wouldn’t be—no, I’m not—Ava is just—it’s not like that.” Clearly, the words are spilling past his lips faster than his brain can process them.
“I don’t care, go, have fun, do whatever you want.” It’s petty, and unreasonable, you know, but you’re hurt, and you want him to hurt too. You hang up and put your phone on do not disturb, slamming your car door shut and heading home as you burst into tears.
Directly connected parts are: Flowers On Your Doorstep and Semiformal Kisses and Cat Fights
TL: @bat-bae, @nyctophilic0vitnir, @smokeywhalee, @obi-mom-kenobi, @prowlingforfood, @penggion, @crystal-crax, @oharasfilipinawife, @generalkenobitrash, @melsimps, @chrishy973, @farrowroyale, @palesatan, @scaryplanetdestroyer, @denzmallows, @36namey
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needtoloveoutloud · 4 months ago
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Shadows Of Our Past, Present, and (possible) Future — Series
My Hero Academia — Female!OC Fan Fiction on AO3
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Part One (Completed — 93k words):
The one where Shota Aizawa stumbles upon a back alley full of stray cats and ends up adopting a child
“Fine, then a cat? We both know how much you love those little furry…things.” At this, Shota paused the game and turned to the pushy blonde next to him. “I actually have considered that.” “And?” “And: also, no. It makes no sense.” Hizashi looked almost scandalized. “Makes no sense?” “I made a pro and contra list.” “Of course you did.”
When underground hero Shota Aizawa, twenty-two years old, is out on patrol one Friday evening, he doesn't expect that a single meow from a cat would lead him to find a homeless girl called Yoru. From then on, Yoru and Shota grow up together, make mistakes together, and try to overcome every obstacle life throws at them.
>> Read on AO3 <<
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Part Two (Ongoing, regular updates — growing long fic — 359k words so far — READ PART 1 FIRST, PLEASE AND THANK YOU):
The one where Yoru Aizawa tries to navigate through life at U.A.
Two days after her fifteenth birthday, Yoru decides to drop the bomb on him. “I want to go to U.A.” “You want to go to U.A.” Her Dad puts the book he's been reading down on the glass balcony table.  “Yes, I want to go to U.A.” She slumps down on the outdoor couch next to him, grabbing the discarded book. “What are you reading?” ‘A Book of Five Rings by Miyamoto Musashi — The classic guide to strategy ’. She raises an eyebrow. “Reading that for fun, huh?” “Why do you want to go to U.A.? You never cared much about heroes. Besides Edgeshot, that is.” Yoru smirks up at him. “What, jealous?” “As if.” “You know, even if they sold Eraserhead posters, I wouldn’t hang them up. It would be super weird.” “Good to know where your loyalties lie.” He rolls his eyes. “Back to the topic at hand, why do you want to go to U.A.? Because Shinso wants to go?” “No.” Pause. “Okay, that may be part of it. But I’m serious. I’ve been thinking about it for a while now, and I really want to go.” “That might be so, but you still neglected to tell me why you want to attend there.” Yoru plays with her hair, noting how it’s time for another hair cut when she finds some splint ends. “I wanna be a hero.” Her Dad blinks. “A hero?” “Yes. Well, I want to help people and do some good with that shitty quirk of mine.”
When Yoru tells her Dad that she wants to attend U.A., she expects it to be a difficult path. She didn't expect all the awkwardness, blossoming friendships, confusing feelings, and near-death experiences, though.
>> Read on AO3 <<
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Please heed the warnings/tags (TWs in the author's notes of chapters where they apply to).
Also: because someone asked this before - you can read it as a reader insert if you want. I don't mind at all. Feel free to imagine yourself as part of the story. Just know that Yoru (the OC) will have descriptions of her visual appearance.
This story is a mix of:
Slice of life
Hurt/Comfort
Angst/Fluff
Humor
Dadzawa
SLOW BURN Romance — Enemies to Lovers (Bakugo x Yoru)
SLOW BURN Romance — EraserMic (but it's a subtle slow burn)
Growing up, coming of age (hopefully lol)
Teenage awkwardness
Mixed media (pictures, music, chat screenshots (later on in Part 2), etc. — chat screenshots will always have the written text below, to make it accessible for visually impaired folks or people who use screen readers)
and more...
Author: NoBecksPleaseNo on AO3
Please don't copy or plagiarize the work, the character, the premise, etc. Also, no cross-posting anywhere, please and thank you.
Disclaimer: Yoru's image is AI generated and then edited/adjusted by the author. The other character images in the header are from Pinterest (besides the one of Present Mic/Midnight, that one's from the light novels) — unfortunately without a source. If you're the artist, and you're not okay with me using them, please message me and I will remove them. If you're the artist and are okay with me using them, please tell me, so I can credit you.
Besides the OC characters, I don't own any already existing characters from the My Hero Academia Universe — that honor belongs to Kohei Horikoshi.
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littlelou22 · 2 years ago
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pretend | joel miller x fem!reader
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summary: joel ends things with you, leaving you in the dark as to why. will the two of you get back together or stay apart?
warnings: angst, hurt, mean!joel, insecure!joel, eventual fluff, age gap (reader in undefined age but young, joel’s canon age), language, men being TRASH, violence, y/n used like twice, probs shitty writing, idk let me know if I miss any
divider credit: @saradika
word count: 6.2k
author's note: my first post, let me know what you think :)
requests open!
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The two of you stood on opposite sides of the bed in your – his – room, chest heaving as you stare at Joel. You didn’t know what had gotten into him, the two of you were fine when you returned from patrol a few hours earlier. Joel had gone to help Tommy with something and you had taken Ellie to see whatever movie was playing tonight.
“I don’t understand why you’re being so cold with me,” you spoke, shaking your head. 
And you truly didn’t. You and Ellie had stopped at the Tipsy Bison to pick up dinner for the three of you after Joel was helping Tommy. Ellie had run off while you waited for the food, seeing Dina stationed at one of the tables. You passed the time at the bar, occasionally making forced small talk with the other patrons. Even though you had been in Jackson for a few months, you still didn’t feel quite at ease with most of the people here.
After you got the food, you ventured off home with Ellie to wait until Joel was done. But he never showed, not until after you and Ellie had eaten and the younger girl had gone off to bed. Joel had stormed in, kicked off his boots, and immediately went upstairs, not sparing you a single glance. Obviously, you had followed him, but you have no idea how you ended up here.
“I’m done with this,” Joel says, eyes everywhere except on you. “I’m done with you.”
“What?” You take a step back as if his words had physically pushed you.
“I needed you for her. That’s it,” Joel snapped at you. “Now that it’s over, I don’t see a reason to pretend anymore. Understand?”
You felt as if the air had been sucked out of you, as if Joel had kicked you right in the stomach. You thought you finally had a grasp on Joel, that you could finally read how he was feeling. But as you stared at him from across the room, he felt more like a stranger than the man you fell in love with.
You wanted to scream, to cry, to plead with him to not do this. To not leave you like everyone else did. But you didn’t – you couldn’t. Before you could even process what was happening, you were nodding.
“Okay,” you breathed, nodding your head. You felt the tears burning behind your eyes, begging to be released, but you refused to crack in front of him. Refused to let him see how much his words had made your heart ache. “If that’s how you feel, then okay.”
So, you left. Out of his bedroom and down the hall, passing Ellie’s door where you knew she was inevitably listening to the fight. Down the stairs and out the front door, letting it swing closed behind you. Your feet carried you down the dark street until you couldn’t go any further. The tears burned behind your eyes, a sob escaping you as you stumbled into the stables, barely making it to one of the hay bales before collapsing in on yourself.
You didn’t understand what happened, what had changed since you got back from Salt Lake City. Since the three of you tried to integrate into the community. Since Ellie started at school. Since you and Joel started to patrol and help wherever you could in Jackson. 
Did you do something that upset Joel? That made him rethink whatever it was between the two of you? The two of you weren’t officially together but your relationship wasn’t nothing. At least, you didn’t think you were nothing.
Clearly, you were wrong. What you thought was a relationship was actually just a means to get by, a way to pass time for Joel. You get it, you really try to. The road was long, it was tough, and it was lonely. The three of you had seen, and done, unthinkable things to get Ellie to the Fireflies. Obviously, that didn’t go as planned, landing the three of you back in Jackson. Where it felt impossible to return to some semblance of normalcy. So, how could you blame him for using you as an escape?
You just wish he would’ve told you from the beginning what it actually was.
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It was morning by the time you dragged yourself out of the stables. Thanking whatever higher power there was that you didn’t have morning patrol, you made your way to Tommy and Maria’s. If Joel didn’t want to pretend, then neither could you. You couldn’t pretend to be okay with being around him after what had happened, so you decided to avoid him at all costs. But, you couldn’t abandon Ellie, not after everything the young girl had been through. Even if she was more distant after Salt Lake, you couldn’t bring yourself to up and leave her. You wouldn’t.
With a deep breath, your knuckles rapped against Tommy and Maria’s front door. You knew it was early, the sun barely just peeking over the horizon but you couldn’t wait. You and Joel were assigned second patrol, and you’d rather not be subjected to that after last night.
“You look like shit,” Tommy said after answering the door. You knew you did, sleeping on a rectangular stack of hay could only offer so much.
“Good morning to you too,” you force a smile at him. You liked Tommy, you had become close with him and his wife after settling in Jackson but you didn’t want to see the younger Miller brother right now. You knew it wasn’t his fault, but you couldn’t help the deepening pit in your stomach at the sight of him. “Is Maria up yet?”
“She’s out back, hanging laundry on the line,” he answers, eyes scanning over your puffy eyes and pale face. “You okay, bug?”
“M’fine Tommy, thank you” you grimace at the nickname. Joel had gifted you the name when the two of you met and upon arriving in Jackson, Tommy took up to calling you that as well. You make your way to the back of the house where you found Maria, true to Tommy’s word. Sighing, you grab one of the shirts in the basket, joining her at the laundry line.
“Good morning,” Maria muses, a playful smile on her face as she turns to you, wiping her hands on her jeans before resting them on her hips. “What can I do for you?”
“What makes you think I need something?” You can’t help but respond. Maria was the closest thing to a friend you had in Jackson, it was hard not to feel as though you could be yourself around her.
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you up and out this early in the morning,” she says, glancing back at the house to see Tommy in the window, watching the women through the glass. He shrugs, answering her silent query. “What’s wrong?”
You sigh heavily, pinching your nose between your fingers after hanging the shirt on the line. “I need you to switch my patrol partner.”
“Trouble in paradise?” Maria asks, voice gentle as if you were a frightened deer.
“No paradise to have troubles in,” you mutter, shaking your head. “I don’t want to talk about it. It didn’t work out, I just need you to switch my partner.”
Maria stared at you, narrowing her eyes as she, like Tommy, surveyed your condition. You knew she saw right through you. Knew there was more to the story than you were letting on to.
“Okay,” she nodded after a minute, looking at the watch on her wrist. “There’s still fifteen minutes before first patrol, go let Alexander know he’s with Miller now. You can patrol with Marcus now.”
You let out the breath you didn’t know you were holding, relief filling you to the thought of not being around Joel. The relief soon left at the mention of your new partner, but you couldn’t be picky here. “Thank you Maria, I won’t let you down.”
“Yeah, yeah,” she replies, crossing her arms in front of her chest. “You better get going if you want to make it.”
“Right,” you say, turning on your heels to start the walk back to the stables, knowing the morning patrol people would be there by now.
Maria watches you leave, only making her way inside once you are out of her sight. As she enters the kitchen, Tommy appears before her with raised eyebrows.
“What was that about?” He asks, passing her a cup of warm tea.
Maria sighs, shaking her head. “I’m not sure, but your dumbass brother might.”
“Joel?” Tommy questions, confused as to what might’ve happened between his brother and the woman he is obviously infatuated with.
“Do you have another brother that I don’t know about?” she raises her eyes at her husband, shaking her head. “She wanted to switch patrol partners, wouldn’t tell me why or what happened.”
“Shit,” Tommy sighs, leaning back against the counter before muttering. “What did you do, Joel?”
“I have no idea,” Maria shrugs before setting her mug in the sink. She pats Tommy’s shoulder before making her way towards the stairs, turning to face her husband before she climbs them. “But have fun letting him know!”
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“That was fun,” Marcus smiled at you as the two of you rode your horses through the front gates after patrol. Eyes zeroing in on your hips as they rise and fall with each step of your horse.
You force a smile at him, half listening to him as your eyes dart back and forth in search of Joel. You knew he was due to head on second patrol and the last thing you wanted to do was see him. “It sure was.”
“Alex never looked that pretty when taking down Infected,” Marcus continues, not picking up on your disinterest in him. “Glad there was a change up, I was beginning to get bored of watching him.”
You don’t offer him a response as you continue towards the stables, preoccupied with hoping and praying that Joel and his new partner had already left for patrol. For once, whatever higher power out there was on your side as you find the stables vacant.
“Thank God,” you mutter to yourself, sliding off your horse, Luna, to guide her towards her stall which was thankfully far away from Marcus’. Once you got her in her stall, you began to take off her saddle and get her ready for the night. As you did so, your mind wandered to your new patrol partner. 
You weren’t oblivious, you knew what Marcus was doing. It wouldn’t be the first time that he tried to sweet talk you. The man had been adamant to gain your attention since you stepped foot in Jackson after the Firefly incident. Whether it was at the stables, the Tipsy Bison, or at movie night, Marcus tried everything to engage you in a conversation.
Any chance he got, Marcus would try his best to make an impression on you. To ask you out on a date. None of his advances ever made it far, you weren’t interested in the men of Jackson and had made it clear. At least, you thought you did, especially after yesterday’s event at the Tipsy Bison.
While you were waiting for the food, Marcus and his friends were putting the ‘tipsy’ in Tipsy Bison. When drinking, Marcus liked to get a little handsy and his previous rejected advances did not seem to deter him trying again. In good Marcus fashion, he attempted, again, to get you to go out with him. You rejected him, as you had many times before, by sliding his arm off your shoulders before moving to a different part of the bar. Luckily, your food was ready soon after so you didn’t have to endure his stares any longer.
“Penny for your thoughts?” A voice rang out in the stall, causing you to whip around to find the intruder.
Ellie leaned against the opening, arms crossed over her chest as she watched you catch your breath, clearly you had not heard her enter the stables.
“Jesus, Els, you can’t sneak up on people like that,” you breathe, shaking your head at the young girl. You eye the backpack she throws onto the ground before she flops down onto the stool you had brought in earlier. “Aren’t you supposed to be in school right now?”
“It’s boring,” she answers as if it was an acceptable reason. “You gonna tell Joel I’m skipping?”
You stiffen at the mention of his name, glancing at Ellie before answering. “Nope.”
“You want to talk about what happened last night?” She presses, confirming your previous suspicions of her eavesdropping tendencies.
“Nope.” Exiting the stall, you make yourself appear busy to avoid further questioning from the girl.
Ellie follows, picking at the end of her sleeves, shifting from foot to foot as she watches you flit around the stable. You spare a glance at her, knowing that her mind is running a mile a minute as it gears up before speaking.
“You okay, Bellie?” You ask, halting your work.
“You aren’t gonna leave, right?” Ellie asks after a moment, eyes avoiding your face.
You sigh, setting down the pail of food you gathered before walking up to the girl. You place your hands on her shoulders, giving her a gentle shake. “Of course not, I promised you that I would never leave you, remember?”
The girl nods, “I remember.”
“Good,” you smile at her, ruffling up her hair before giving her a gentle push towards the stable doors. “Go back to school before you get us both in trouble.”
After Ellie leaves, you putter around the stables for a few hours before you hear the clopping of horses approaching the stables. Peeking out of the window, you see Joel and his new patrol partner.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. You think, immediately running back to Luna’s stall. You frantically grab your things and hightail it out of the back entrance of the stables. Leaning against the back of the barn, you wait until you hear the men enter before making your way back to town. You had no idea how you were going to avoid Joel for the foreseeable future, but there was no way you were ready to face him.
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The next few weeks went by similarly. You left the house before the sun rose, before anyone in the house was awake. You would go on patrol, endure several hours of the torture that is Marcus and his antics before returning to the town. You’d wait to watch Joel leave for patrol before going to the house you shared or going into town. Once he was back home, you’d return to the stables where you would spend your evenings, only returning home in the late hours of the night. One day while he was on patrol, you had moved all of your things into the third bedroom that was now your own. It worked, you rarely ran into Joel. When you did, you would turn and go the opposite direction or retreat back to your room. 
It worked until it didn’t.
You were at the Tipsy Bison, leaned against the bar with a drink in your hand as you listened to Maria. She had to practically drag you out here after days of begging for you to socialize. To be a part of the community. You partly did it to get her off your back, but as you listened to the conversation around you, you felt happy that she managed to get you to come out. It had been a long time since you stayed in one place for longer than ten minutes without constantly checking over your shoulder.
Maria had been recounting a story about Tommy from early on in their relationship when you felt it. Felt eyes burning into your back. Stares that felt like ice water spilling down your shirt, sending vicious shivers up your spine. It felt uneasy, putting you on edge. The longer it lingered, the more uncomfortable you grew.
Turning to give the establishment a once over, you noticed two things. One, Joel was in the corner with his brother, hands full with glasses of neat whiskey as they conversed with one another. Eyes on Tommy, not on you. And two, your oh so lovely patrol partner making his way over towards your group.
“Maria,” you start, turning to your friend, attempting to say your goodbyes before booking it out of the bar when a rather large and heavy arm is slung around your shoulders.
Marcus steadies himself on your shoulder, the smell of alcohol seeping from his pores as he surveys your group, eyes lingering on you for too long. “Ladies! Looking fantastic tonight!”
“Why thank you, Marcus,” one of the women, Fiona, in your group respond, smirking at the obviously drunk man. She bats her eyelashes at him and you feel sick. “How can we help you?”
“Just wanted to talk to my patrol partner here,” Marcus turns to peer down at you, offering you a smile as he squeezes you to his side. “Tommy told me we are patrolling a new area tomorrow, so I figured the two of us could talk strategy. Maybe over a drink or two.”
You grimace, trying to shrug his arm off your shoulder but he is gripping onto you impeccably tight. “It’s late, Marcus, and I was just about to leave. We can talk about it tomorrow.”
“How about he walks you home?” Maria suggests, raising her eyebrows at you. You throw her a look, hoping she picks up on the obvious disapprovement you have over this idea. But she doesn’t, the other women in the group joining in on the idea. “The two of you can discuss it on the way back.”
“It’s the least you can do,” Fiona nods at you, cutting you off when you go to protest. “You did force him to change partners, you can’t blame the man for wanting to make sure he’s safe tomorrow.”
Sending Fiona a hard glare, you push Marcus’ arm off of your shoulder to slip on your coat. “Fine, let’s go.”
You wave off the group’s goodbyes before beelining for the door. The faster you get out of here, the faster you can get home and away from Marcus. On the way out, you glance at the table that Tommy and Joel were residing at, finding it vacant. At this point, you didn’t care if you would run into Joel at the house. Anything was preferable to spending any more time than necessary with your insufferable patrol partner. 
After exiting the building, you start towards home at a quick pace, hoping to shorten the usual ten minute walk into a five minute walk. You don’t feel Marcus at your side, hoping that you lost him in your haste out of the bar. Your thoughts are silenced when you feel his hand wrap around your wrist, yanking you to a halt and into one of the allies in the town square.
“What’s the rush, sweetheart?” Marcus smirks, pulling closer to you as his grip on your wrist tightens.
“Got the kid waiting up for me back home,” you quickly lie, tugging your wrist back in an attempt to free yourself. “QZ schools weren’t the best, she needs help with her homework.”
He chuckles, shaking his head at you before backing you into the brick wall of the alley behind you. “I’m sure her dad can help her with that. We have some things to discuss.”
“It would be best to discuss whatever it is in the morning,” you gulp, pressing closer to the wall to create more space between the two of you. “When we both haven’t been at a bar for the night. With clearer minds.”
“Baby,” Marcus breathes, “My mind has never been more clear.”
He ducks his head, pressing his lips forcefully against yours. His hands move to your hips, pressing himself into you. You desperately try pulling your head back to avoid him, but the brick wall behind you prevents you from moving away. Panicking, you sink your teeth into his lip, biting down until you taste the metallic tang of blood. Your hands move to his chest, pushing him off with all your strength. Marcus stumbles back, hands dabbing at his lip to feel the damage. 
“What the actual fuck are you thinking?” You seeth, wiping the taste of him away with the back of your hand. You stare at him for a beat, bewildered, before pushing off the wall to make your escape.
You make it a few steps before Marcus surges forward, arms encircling your waist to pull you off the ground. All attempts of your struggle are thwarted when he throws you onto the pavement, hands wrapping around your throat as he straddles your stomach, your arms pinned to his thighs.
“You disrespectful, little bitch,” he spits, hands tightening at your throat. “Your daddy ever teach you manners as a young girl? Like all girls need to be taught?”
You gasp at the lack of oxygen as you try to squirm your way out of his grasp. Your constant struggle only seems to agitate Marcus more as he pulls you off the ground before slamming you back down. The back of your head bounces off the hard pavement beneath the two of you. All efforts to fight cease as dots begin to swarm your vision. 
“You respect men that want to talk to you,” Marcus growls, smirking at your dazed face. His hands continue to tighten around your throat. “You’re lucky to even have my attention.”
Your vision is starting to go dark when his weight is suddenly pulled off of you. Coughing, you roll onto your stomach, attempting to gain your bearings. You hear fighting next to you, propping yourself on your hands and knees to try to see what’s going on.
“So help me god,” Joel practically snarls, one hand gripping Marcus’ collar while the other delivers a nose shattering punch. 
“If you ever go near her again, I will kill you.” Punch.
“If you look at her again, I will kill you.” Punch.
“If you even so much as breathe in her direction, I will kill you.” Punch.
“Do I make myself clear?”
You watch from your hands and knees as Joel delivers punch after punch until Marcus is whimpering under him, gasping for air like you were only moments earlier. Once he believes the message has been received, Joel drops his hold on Marcus and backs away, chest heaving.
You must make a noise as he turns to you, eyes quickly scanning your face before his gaze settles on the hand prints adoring your throat. He’s rushing to you before you know it, gentle hands helping raise you to your feet.
“Can you stand, bug?” Joel whispers, softly turning to check the spot where your head had kissed the payment. Today must be your lucky day, no blood appearing on his fingers after he gently ran them through your hair.
“M’fine, Joel,” you rasp, embarrassment pooling in your stomach. While you were thankful that he came by when he did, you couldn’t help but wish it happened to be anyone else. 
Joel sighs, running his hand down his face. “You sure you’re okay?”
“I said I’m fine Joel,” you pull yourself out of his gentle grasp, wrapping your arms around your midsection tightly. You take a few cautious steps back, stumbling but steady enough to walk.
“Let me get you home, angel,” Joel steps forward, hands reaching out to help you. “Ellie’s been askin’ bout you.”
Shaking your head, you continue to take tentative steps away from him. “I can take care of myself, Joel. You don’t have to pretend anymore, remember?”
And with that, you turned on your heels and began to make your way back to the house. You knew he was trailing some feet behind you, but you couldn’t bring yourself to care at the moment. All you wanted to do was crawl into your bed and forget that the night ever even happened.
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“It looks like the bruising should heal in a few weeks,” Rick, Jackson’s one and only doctor, assesses, fingers gently pressing against the prominent hand marks on your neck. “The petechiae should clear up within the next few days.”
You nod, readjusting your collar whenever the doctor leans back to scribble down some notes. In the corner of your eye, you see Tommy and Maria share a glance before whispering, as if you weren’t even in the room.
“Any new loss of consciousness? Confusion? Dizzy spells?” Rick asks, pen pausing on the paper.
“Nope,” voice still scratchy but nowhere near as bad as it was a few days ago. “Can I go back on patrol now?”
With a sigh, Rick sets his clipboard down. “Sweetheart, what you went through was a traumatic event. You need to let yourself have time to recuperate mentally too, not just physically.”
“I take that as a no then,” you deflate when the doctor nods.
After answering the rest of Rick’s questions, you’re finally able to leave the infirmary. It seemed like you were there for hours, so to feel the sun on your face whenever you exited felt like sweet relief.
“Y/N,” Maria starts, guilt practically dripping from her.
“Maria, if you apologize one more time, I think I might implode,” you interrupt her, turning to face her. “You didn’t know, I didn’t tell you what he had been saying on patrol. This isn’t your fault.”
“But –”
“No buts,” groaning, you grab her shoulders, giving her a playful shake. “Some drunk asshole’s actions are not your fault. There was no way you could’ve known what would happen.”
“Darlin’, she’s right,” Tommy intervenes. “It’s no one’s fault but the man that did it.”
You hum in agreement, rolling your eyes at the way Maria practically pouts. “Just don’t give me another shitty patrol partner and we can call it even. Okay?”
Maria nods, pulling you into a tight hug. You gently pat her back, knowing the hug is more for her sake than yours, so you allow yourself to enjoy it, just this once.
You’re about to walk away but Tommy stops you, hand gently on your wrist. “Ellie wanted me to tell you to meet her at your house, said she needed help with somethin’.” 
“Little shit skipped school again?” You groan. “What would be so important that we have to do it now instead of after dinner?”
Tommy shrugs, smirk playing on his lips. “You really think I'm privy to how she operates?”
“I wish I was,” you mutter, waving your goodbyes before trudging back to your house.
You were going to have to talk to Joel about this. Ellie skipped at least twice a week and you thought the last discussion you had about it got through to her, but apparently not. You understood why she struggled with it, being one of the only outsiders in a building full of kids that had never been outside the walls of Jackson. People looked at you guys funny, you and Joel got it too. Even in the apocalypse, school was important.
After what seemed like an eternity, you crossed the threshold of your home. “Ellie?” you called.
No response.
“Ellie Bellie?” You called again, hanging your coat on the hooks by the door. You knew Joel was on patrol so you began to wander to find the girl.
After checking the entire upstairs, you began to worry.
“Ellie!” You yelled, thundering down the steps and into the kitchen.
“In the basement!” The girl finally responded.
With a breath of relief, you descended the basement steps and found the girl sorting through boxes, various tools of Joel’s spread around her.
“What did we talk about?” You approach, tugging on her ponytail. “No more skipping school, kid.”
“Yeah, yeah, whatever,” she waves you off, pointing to the door behind her. “The water heater is in there, right?”
“How am I supposed to know?” You shrug. “The old man takes care of that stuff.”
Ellie rolls her eyes, grabbing your arm and pulling you towards the door. “Well the stupid fuckin’ thing stopped working and I want Joel to be able to have a hot shower when he gets back from patrol.”
“So call Tommy, Els,” you resist her tugging. “I can’t fix it.”
Pouting, the young girl bats her eyelashes at you, putting on her best puppy dog face. “Please, please, please?”
After a few more seconds of her insistent begging, you cave in. “Fuck, fine. Just stop with the face. Promise you won’t skip school again and I’ll see what I can do?”
“Promise!” Ellie smiles in victory, holding out the worn owner’s manual to you.
You grab the dusty book from her before shouldering the door open, wandering into the room. It’s pitch black and you can’t seem to find the lightswitch.
“Els, where’s the light?” You ask, blinking to try to adjust to the lack of light.
“Don’t be mad, okay?” You hear the girl plead before the lights flicker on and the door slams shut, lock clicking.
A tired looking Joel sits in front of you, one hand handcuffed to the gas line of the water heater. You gape at him, part of you impressed that Ellie was able to get the one up on him.
But then the reality of the situation sets in and you start to bang on the door. “Ellie, open the damn door!”
“You can come out when the two of you work out whatever shit happened,” Ellie’s voice is muffled through the door but her message is loud and clear. A key slides in from under the door. “Unlock him if you want to.”
“Great, just great,” you mutter, forehead resting on the door. “Looks like we’re never going to get out of here.”
You can hear Ellie stomp up the basements and slam the door, off to do god knows what with both of her guardians locked in a room. Turning, you look to see Joel, his eyes watching your movements. You take in his appearance – right hand cuffed to the flimsy gas line of the water heater, left hand resting in his lap, both legs extended in front of him with crossed ankles. Under different circumstances, you would have laughed.
“Would you mind givin’ me that key?” Joel asks, motioning to the key resting on the ground by your feet.
Nodding, you kick the key to him, praising yourself that it slides within reach of him. You watch as he uncuffs himself, rubbing his skin where the cuff adored his wrist. Joel slowly stands, exhaling as he stretches himself up right. Once he’s upright, you take into account his bruised knuckles, undoubtedly from the other night.
The two of you are silent. The tension is palpable – too thick to cut with a knife, maybe even a chainsaw. You watch as Joel awkwardly shifts foot to foot. You can tell that he has a lot on his mind, but you aren’t sure if you want to know what he’s thinking.
You clear your throat, already regretting your next words. “Thank you, by the way.”
Joel nods, staying on his designated side of the small room. “I’d never just let that happen to you, y’know that.”
The awkward silence lasts a few more beats, neither of you know what to say to the other.
“You don’t have to avoid the house and town,” Joel breaks first, clearing his throat. “We can be friends, can’t we?”
“Speak for yourself,” you mutter, turning around to see if the door is actually locked. It is, to your dismay.
“Bug…” Joel starts but the nickname sets you off.
“Can you, like, not call me that?” You snap, whirling around to glare at him. “You lost any and all privilege to that the second you decided to use me for your own personal pleasure. Without regard to how I would feel, may I add?”
Joel scoffs, shaking his head, “I didn’t use you for my ‘own personal pleasure’.”
“Really?” Laughing, you feel insane with how worked up he has got you in one sentence. “Then what exactly did you mean by, and I quote, ‘pretend’.”
Joel opens his mouth to respond, but you cut him off.
“Or what about ‘I’m done with you’?” You step into his space, practically chest to chest. “Because being done with someone doesn’t really leave room for friendship, now does it?”
“That’s not what I meant, y’know that!”
“Do I, Joel? Because it doesn’t feel like it!” You can feel your hands shaking as you shove him back. “You are so hot and cold. You give me fucking whiplash. I can’t stand it! You–”
His lips press against yours, hands settling on your waist to keep you in place. You freeze, the feeling of his mouth moving against yours is a foreign after not feeling it for so long. You feel yourself melting into his arms, your own wrapping around his neck as you kiss him back, lips fusing together as if they were made for each other.
Until you realize what’s happening.
“What’s wrong, bug?” Joel whispers after you throw yourself back, chest heaving.
“You can’t just do that,” your voice shakes and you feel small under his gaze. “You can’t fuck with my feelings like this.”
Joel lets out an aggravated sigh, hands running through his curly locks. “I’m not tryin’ to, sweetheart.”
“Then what are you trying to do, Joel? Because I can’t do the back and forth.” You desperately try to blink away the tears pooling at your eyes. “One minute you want me, the next you don’t. I don’t know what you want from me.”
A tear slips down your cheek.
And all of Joel’s resolve breaks.
“Baby,” he breathes, hands cupping your cheeks as he thumbs away your tears. “I…shit, hold on.”
You wait. You wait as his eyes squeeze closed. As he inhales and exhales deeply. As he shakes his head before looking at you again.
“I love you,” Joel admits. “But I’m no good for you.”
“Joel–”
“Please,” he begs. “I can’t protect you, or Ellie. You saw what happened with the raiders at the university, I almost got the two of you killed because I’m not as young as I once was. I’m not a good man, bug, I’ve done so many bad things that I will never deserve someone like you, no matter what I do now.”
You listen to all of his reasons why he doesn’t think he deserves you. You watch the pain of his past hold him back from ever realizing how much he is worth.
“Is that why you did that?” You ask quietly, hands coming to rest on his chest. “You pushed me away because you think you’re too old for me? Too much of a burden on me?”
Joel nods, tucking a piece of your hair behind your ear.
“But, Joel, those are your reasons,” you breathe. “Your thoughts, your opinions. Not mine.”
He shakes his head. “But–”
“But nothing,” you interrupt. “I love you because of all of that. I love everything about you, your past included, Joel. There is nothing that you could do or say that could ever possibly change that. Why do you think I avoided you for weeks?”
“Because you hated me?”
“Because I couldn’t be around you thinking that I loved you when you hated me.” You laugh, leaning up to briefly press your lips against his. “Next time, how about you talk to me before you make all the decisions?”
Nodding, Joel leans forward and slots his lips against yours. You wrap your arms around his neck, locking your hands together. You feel Joel smile against your lips, a feeling you had missed, before pressing yourself as close to him as possible. Your kisses become more feverish, Joel backing you up against the door as his hands run down your sides to your hips. His hands snake around your waist, lowering themselves to your butt, groaning at the way you react to him.
A loud bang on the door startles the two of you apart.
“As much as I love that the two of you figured it out,” Ellie yells through the door. “I don’t want to hear those noises. Ever.”
A giggle escapes your lips as you hide your face in Joel’s neck, a smile spreads across your lips when you feel his arms encompass your waist.
“Are you decent? Can I let you out now?”
“Yes, Ellie.”
“Thank god,” Ellie unlocks and swings the door open. She smiles seeing the two of you wrapped up together. “I was beginning to think you’d never figure it out.”
Joel shakes his head. “Shut up.”
“You mean ‘you’re welcome’,” Ellie teases before escaping up the stairs, pausing at the top. “Just don’t suck each other's faces around me, got it?”
“Yes ma’am,” you salute her goodbye before turning back to Joel, who is pretending to look annoyed at the teen.
“By the way, how did she manage to handcuff you?”
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missmonsters2 · 2 years ago
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Your Touch is My Shelter
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Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x Fem!Reader
Summary: 6 months later, Natasha returns from the dead. It's a tightly kept secret as it's unknown how she returned, but everyone claws and fights about who will keep watch over her like savages. You're far down the list of people who should protect her, but you find yourself unable to leave her be.
Warnings/Tags: hurt/comfort. undisclosed trauma. physical and mental signs of trauma. angst. somber assisted bath time. sad hair braiding. emphasis on hurt AND comfort.
Note: This takes place after endgame :-) the dates might be inaccurate idk i did my best 🥲 ha-ha enjoy 👁️👁️
Masterlist || Library Blog || AO3
Reminder there's no taglist but you can follow my library blog for notifications 💘
Count: 5.2k
Please do not copy, repost, or translate my work anywhere else.
⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷
You heard the news through Bruce. 
Well, it was through Bruce telling Pepper, and you just happened to be at the coffee machine getting shitty coffee. The quality drastically dropped since Tony was gone, and you've been putting off telling Pepper she needed to literally buy anything else. 
You didn't really know how long was the appropriate time for someone to grieve before you could ask if they could buy another brand of coffee.
Tony was gone. 
A part of you thinks you keep putting off telling Pepper because then you'd have to face—really face—he was gone. 
Steve was gone. 
What did it matter, really, in the grand scheme of things? Coffee was just coffee, and it'd probably taste fine if you just put a shitload of sugar and creamer in it. 
Vision was gone. 
Honestly, you only really noticed because it was the same brand as whatever was stocked up at the Avengers Compound. 
Natasha was gone. 
But perhaps the coffee always tasted bad at the Compound and it had nothing to do with Tony being gone. Natasha used to bring coffee into the office most days for people, and Clint filled in the other days. 
Maybe Tony Stark just liked shitty coffee, and you were only now just noticing it. 
Natasha was back. 
Your hand faltered at the coffee machine, spilling a little of it on your hand, and the burn stung immediately.
"Are you okay?" Bruce asked as he noticed you inhale a sharp breath.
"Yeah, I'm fine." You smiled awkwardly at him before looking at Pepper. "Morgan's fine. She just has the flu and her fever's gone down. Make sure she gets plenty of rest and fluids. I'm going to set up a humidifier for her and help her settle into bed with a movie and wait for her to fall asleep before I head out."
Pepper let out a heavy breath, putting her hand over her chest in relief. "Oh, perfect. Thank you so much for coming suddenly. I just—Morgan doesn't really like going to the hospital, and suddenly she started throwing up and having a fever—"
"It's fine, Pepper," you waved off her ramblings after you wiped what you spilled on the counter. "You can always call me if you need me."
"Seriously, I think I might just employ you full-time as a live-in doctor if you say that," Pepper joked, and you laughed. 
"I am already your live-in doctor, just for one of your research labs. instead."
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You don't think about Natasha—at least, you try not to. 
You heard things here and there about it through Pepper. Apparently, she's being held in a government facility similar to The Raft, detained like some criminal they needed to study instead of the war hero who sacrificed everything to save the world. 
It made you sick to your stomach. 
But you hear that Clint, Bruce, and Nick Fury have been fighting to get custody of her, so you don't think about it. There were people who knew Natasha far better than you did and were way closer to her than you were. 
She was in good hands. 
So, you continue on with your daily routine to pass your monotonous days, unaware you're waiting for some kind of update.
⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷
The next time you heard about Natasha Romanoff, it was Clint and Bruce cornering you at your lab.
"What?" You panicked, tensing up. "Why me?"
"You're the only person Natasha ever sought out to treat her," Clint answered, and you felt even more lost at the fact he knew. "Natasha allows medical professionals onsite to help her, but there were times she left to go see you. That has to mean something."
But, of course, he knew. He was Natasha's...best friend. And Clint was an incredibly nosy person, even if Natasha didn't tell him. 
"I've only treated her a handful of times—literally only five times. I don't know her that well," you shook your head, trying to walk around them. "I didn't even know she had a sister until you told me."
"Please," Clint begged. "I'm fighting to get her out, and the doctors they have looking after her are shady and callous with her. I can only visit her with Nick's influence, but it's not enough to get her out of there."
"And what do you suppose I can do?"
"You're a renowned cellular biologist," Bruce cut in. "If they're holding her for research, we want someone on our side who will at least treat her like a human being. The faster we get answers, the faster we can get her out."
"Please," Clint begged again. "Natasha needs help. She's...different. And it's only going to get worse if she remains in there. She's not talking, and they won't let her go until they can find some answers."
It felt wrong. 
You don't want to study Natasha Romanoff like an animal. Despite being a scientist with an inquisitive mind, you don't care about how she returned.
But it sounded like Natasha would be researched whether you liked it or not. And if that was the case, you do wonder how the other doctors may be treating her.
"Fine, we're going first thing in the morning," you gritted out, unable to block out the handful of memories of times you've treated her.
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June 2012
"Oo, that looks painful," you hissed in sympathy as a redhead with a busted lip and nasty gash on her temple entered the med bay.
There was a snort that sounded like a half-grunt. "It looks worse than it feels. I hope I'm not intruding, but Tony said I should see you to be treated."
"Natasha, right?" You asked slowly, gesturing to a seat for her to take as you grabbed some medical supplies. 
"Yes," Natasha replied, equally slow with caution.
"Tony talks about you a lot," you tried to reassure her of whatever paranoia she might have. It probably didn't help that Natasha was still in her catsuit and probably would've preferred to be called by her alias.
"Well, don't believe everything he says," Natasha gives a light but somewhat tight smile. 
"Oh, so you aren't a unique woman with high intellect, sneaky, and rightfully smug?" You teased, and it was flattering that you could make a superhero laugh. 
You began treating Natasha's wound carefully. 
"You're pretty good at this, doc," Natasha commented as you blew on her brow, even if it didn't sting. "You're pretty gentle. Must be why Tony says you're his personal doctor."
You chuckled. "I'm actually a cellular biologist. Tony is funding my research and pretty much my lifestyle. With the money he's paying me, he can come crying about his boo-boos anytime. Although, he doesn't really come to me for serious stuff. It's usually if he has something ridiculous like a papercut."
"But you can treat wounds and other medical things?" 
"I was on my way to becoming a medical doctor before I decided to go into research instead."
"Huh," Natasha hummed, raising her brow at you. "Smart cookie."
"I'd like to think so," you finished cleaning Natasha's wound and putting a bandaid over it. "Feel free to come see me if you need any other basic medical aid. For a pretty redhead, it's free of charge."
"And if I come back blonde?"
"We'll cross that bridge when we get to it," you smiled, and Natasha smirked back at you.
"Smart and funny. Tony has it too good."
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April 2014
"This is the worst bandage job I've ever seen. Who did you go to see for this? A grocery clerk?"
Natasha grunted. "Hi, to you too, doc."
You looked at Natasha, noticing how different her hair is now. But it's been about two years since you have seen her. Despite your offer for her to come to you anytime she needed help, she never did. Or she rarely did, you supposed. 
You could only deduce that Natasha was used to caring for her wounds on her own. That, or she didn't trust you. 
"Alright, let's go to my office," you sighed. 
"Am I interrupting?"
"Not really, kind of hit a brick wall."
"Oh, me too."
You looked over at Natasha, who had a straight face, but you noticed the bruise on her temple outside the obvious gun wound on her shoulder.
You pursed your lips. "Will you hate me if I laugh?"
"Not at all. On the contrary, I may like you less if you don't."
⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷
June 2015
"You know, when I told you that you could come for me for basic medical aid, I feel like you didn't understand the meaning of basic."
"Is this too complicated for you?"
"No."
"Then am I unwelcomed?"
You pursed your lips at the redhead, who stared at you with a tiny upward quirk on her lip. "No," you sighed. "Just not sure why you'd want to see me for such serious wounds. There are other more experienced doctors."
You lift Natasha's shirt up, looking at the long gash on the side of her stomach. "We're gonna need to stitch this up. I've been doing research with Dr. Cho, and we have a new machine that can help with cell tissue generation. It would be faster than me manually stitching—"
"It's fine," Natasha declined. "I'd prefer if you manually did it."
You frown lightly at the fact but relent to the redhead's wishes. Another year passes, and Natasha's hair has changed again. 
You worked silently on cleaning Natasha's wound, and she also declined the anesthetic. You focus on stitching up the wound with precision and care.
"I like to go to you for some things because your touch is gentle," Natasha said quietly, but it felt so loud in the silent room. "It makes me feel human when I can feel your touch."
You looked over at her face briefly, but Natasha wasn't looking at you. You don't take any deeper meaning into it. She's someone who's probably felt dehumanized most of her life. The machines that can heal her twice as fast would be fine for life-threatening injuries, but it probably all feels clinical. 
You looked back down at the stitch. "Well, as long as you're a redhead, it's free of charge."
"Don't kid yourself, I would look perfect blonde."
"Yeah, you keep telling yourself that."
⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷
September 2016
"What are you doing here?" You hissed as you pulled Natasha in quickly, peering outside before shutting the door. 
"Why? Am I unwelcomed now?" Natasha's tone sounded a little hurt, and you scan her body. She didn't seem to be bleeding anywhere that required immediate attention, but you did notice crusted blood at the edge of her nostrils. 
"No, but you could get caught here," you shook your head at her. "They're looking for you and the rest of team cap everywhere."
Natasha shrugged. "I highly doubt Tony has your place under surveillance. We don't meet enough for anyone to consider looking for me through you."
You sighed, not sure what to feel about the statement. "I suppose. I don't work for Tony anymore, anyway."
Natasha's brows furrowed.
"Why?"
"I don't agree with what he's doing."
"So you're on Steve's side?"
"No, I think Steve was obstinate too. They're both stupid. Men are stupid."
Natasha laughed before wincing as she held her nose.
"What happened?" You brought her over to your couch before finding your first aid kit.
"I broke my nose," Natasha shrugged. "Can you believe breaking my nose saved millions of girls?"
"With you? Yes." You smirked as you tilted her head to look at the injury closer. "Lucky you. Looks like you don't need surgery. Do you always come here immediately after you save the world?"
"Yep."
"Couldn't even clean your nose before you did?"
"And deprive you of giving me care? I wouldn't dare."
You snorted, carefully cleaning the blood in and around her nose. It was silent again before Natasha spoke up.
"So, what happened with your research stuff now that Tony's not sponsoring your work?"
"Pepper is funding it, even though she knows I won't share anything with Stark Industries at the moment. She doesn't want me to sell my research or provide any data to other companies."
"Smart cookie."
"And a really hot blonde."
"This feels targeted. It's like you know I might dye my hair blonde soon."
"You're still a redhead; I have no idea what you mean. I like your hair, though. Braids look good on you."
⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷
June 2018
Natasha showed up at your front step, holding her rib. There's a look of genuine relief at seeing you.
"You're still here," her voice sounds empty and hollow. "You're still here."
You pulled her inside gently. You're still in shock yourself. You were on a walk when people started disappearing left and right. The sheer panic on the streets was chaos as you were dialing Pepper frantically, almost crying when she picked up the phone. Then there were actual tears when you called other people in your life, and half of them didn't pick up...and they weren't going to. 
"I'm here," you swallowed. "What happened to your rib?"
"I don't know." Natasha looked so lost. There was the look of failure and self-blame all over her face. 
"Does it hurt?"
"I don't know."
You grasp her wrist, carefully moving her hand away from her rib before gently putting your fingertips against them. Your fingers trail up, down, and around. 
Suddenly, Natasha broke into tears. 
"Does it hurt?" You asked, panicked.
"You're still here," was all Natasha choked through her tears.
You didn't know what to do other than treat her wounds more gently than ever before while reassuring her you hadn't disappeared. You were one of the many people on this planet still here. And when she was better, she'd get the rest of them back. 
It was a long and exhausting night, and Natasha fell asleep in your bed, and you made sure she was comfortable before leaving to sleep on the couch.
Natasha's hair has changed again.
"You look good blonde."
That was the last time you saw her. 
⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷
Natasha's hair has changed again. She's gone back to being a redhead with blonde tips. Her hair was a mess, barely brushed, and looked knotted. 
The room was big and had padded walls, a singular bed in one corner, and a toilet and sink in another. There were lights in parts of the cell but also areas of darkness. It looked like a fucking prison cell. 
You were looking through an unbreakable glass window, the middle holding up a microphone you assumed was linked to the speaker in the room.
Natasha stood in the middle of the room under the light in a hospital gown falling off her shoulder. Her hands were covered in scars, and her lips were so chapped, you were sure they'd split even if Natasha breathed the wrong way. 
Natasha was only a few feet away from you, but it felt like she was a million miles away.
They let you see her alone under the guise of privacy as you saw her.
You felt you weren't supposed to see this—see her like this. 
A sense of dread filled you at the blank expression on Natasha's face at what she'd gone through—what she was still going through. 
She was a hero, and this was how they were treating her? This was someone who had fought wars repeatedly for this stupid country and the rest of the world, and they had her locked up like a mental ward patient from the 1600s.
You thought the government had gotten better. There were reforms and peace after people came back from the snap. This wasn't how they were supposed to treat someone who'd given up their life to ensure everyone got theirs. 
It shouldn't matter that she came back; she had still given it up in the first place for them. 
Natasha didn't even seem to recognize you through the glass as you stepped closer to the microphone. She looked past you as if she could tell the exit was somewhere behind you. 
"Natasha?" You said into the mic, and it bellowed into the room.
Nothing. 
"Nat?" 
Natasha's eyes were listless. She was a broken, empty shell that seemed more like an animated corpse than actually being alive.
You swallowed, trying one more time. "You're still a redhead. Looks like it's still free of charge."
Natasha's eyes flickered this time, her head tilts towards you as she blinked with focus. It was just a spark, but it was something, and relief spreads through you. 
"Not completely." You could barely hear her voice, but it was coarse. Cold.
There should've been a joke about some kind of discount, but Natasha didn't make it. You were speechless.
You didn't know what to say. Don't worry, you're trapped in here, but I'm going to help with the research, and hopefully, we'll get you out soon?
It was like prolonging a death sentence. You were horrified.
"Just—wait for me," the words flew out of your mouth so fast but you meant them with every ounce of your being. "You're gonna go home with me today."
Natasha's eyes sparked at the words but just as quick as you saw it, they died out, falling back into listlessness. She turned, stepping into a darkened corner away from your view and prying eyes of the cameras as she said, "No, I'm not."
You realized she's probably spent weeks watching Clint, Bruce, and Fury try to get her out unsuccessfully.
The resignation made something lurch in your throat and eyes sting with desperation and rage. 
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"So, we can send you a contract—"
"You're going to release her to my custody," you cut off some government official. He was old, wearing some kind of toupee that was slicked back to hide his balding head. 
He looked at you in disbelief, almost laughing like you were some stupid, naive young girl. 
He looks at Clint and Bruce, who are also just looking at you in shock.
"As I've told your friends and Nick Fury, this is out of their hands. The Accords are still intact as of right now, therefore—"
"I don't care about the Accords. You will release her into my care. I'm more than qualified and I have the resources to find the inane answers you're looking for while rehabilitating Agent Romanoff," you cut him off again, able to tell that it was irking him. 
"That won't be necessary as you can see we have the resources here," the government official raised his brow at you.
"Your resources can't compete with Stark's resources."
It was no secret that Tony had left a very sizable fortune to you in his will, outside of everything he gave to Pepper and Morgan. And it was also no secret how close you were with the surviving Starks. 
"Doctor," the government official sighed, obviously making it sound like you were a nuisance. "If you're not here to join our research team, I suggest you go on your way and remember the NDA you signed."
You glared at him even more. "I'm not leaving without Agent Romanoff. You will hand her over to me, or you will regret it."
"And exactly how will I regret it?" The government official looked smug, and you smirked back at him.
"I'm still in talks with the government regarding my research, and I will pull out and sell that information outside of this country as I'm free to do so. I know Dr. Cho is in talks between the US and South Korea about her nano-technology. One word from me, and America can fall behind on those advancements as well." You pulled out your cell phone in a threatening manner. "Pepper and I will pull out all of our money from the very same banks and company investments that you're supporting and make you watch as they collapse one after another."
"You'd ruin our entire economy—our country by doing so!" The official was red in the face. "You'd put your entire country into chaos?" He sneered at you.
"I will if you don't give me Agent Romanoff!" You sneered back at him. "It's not like you won't eventually get your research and answers if she's in my custody. It works in both our favor."
The official is staring at you, glaring and seething.
"I imagine your colleagues and superiors will pin the blame on you if this entire economy and country goes into ruin because if I have to do that, I will say that it's the government's fault. The NDA said I can't specifically talk about Natasha and this place, which I won't. But I'm sure some journalist will discover the truth and plaster all over the news what you're doing to a war hero," your voice was so vindictive; you're not sure if you've ever been so cold before. 
"So," your voice was flat, devoid of emotion now. "What will it be?"
⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷
It was agreed that Natasha would stay in a cabin that Pepper owned out in the countryside. You were to provide monthly updates on your research and rehabilitation progress. And while this was in headway, neither you nor Natasha was free to leave the country or this planet. 
Clint initially wanted you and Natasha to stay with him and his family, but you declined. You pointed out that it would be hard for him and his family—his children, especially—to see Natasha like this. 
Pepper had everything prepared while you gingerly collected Natasha.
"We're going home, Natasha," you said softly, shrugging off your jacket to wrap around her shoulders. But Natasha still didn't react, even if she let you take her hand and drag her out of the facility. 
During the car ride, you mentally planned what you needed to do. Natasha needed to eat, take a bath, and rest. 
"Have you eaten yet?" You asked the redhead, sitting stoically in the car, straight as a rod. 
There was no answer. Natasha was peering out the windshield, her hands perfectly on both thighs. Clint looked worried as he looked at you.
"Natasha?" You gently placed her hand over hers. You could feel the bumps of the white scars over her hand. A part of you is too frightened to ask where she got these from. 
Natasha looked down at your hand over hers before looking at you. Her eyes were so empty. Such a dull green like dying grass.
"Did you eat?" 
Natasha nodded once before looking back outside the windshield. 
You looked at Clint, trying to give him a reassuring smile, but deep down, you were afraid you had no idea what the fuck you were doing. 
⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷⋆⊶⊷⊶⊷⊶⊷
"Pepper says you've been here before, but let me know if you need help finding anything," you brought her into the house where Natasha just stood, looking at nothing in particular. 
"Um," you took a shaky breath. "How about a bath? I'm sure it'll be good to get the grime and stale air off of you." 
Natasha didn't move on her own, so you began to lead her up the stairs to the bathroom. 
It was a detached tub near the high window to get plenty of sunlight without anyone being able to peer in. 
"I'll just get this started for you," you offered. Turning on the tap and pouring in a liquid that formed into bubbles. "Just make sure to check the temperature and adjust. Pepper says that sometimes that faucet can be a little finicky."
You turned to Natasha, who stood there, staring at the wall. She was unmoving, making no gesture if she was waiting for you to get out or to start undressing.
"Do you, um, need help?" You asked, but there was no answer. 
Maybe it would wake her up a little once she was in the water. 
"I'm—" you took a long breath in. "I'm gonna help you undress and get into the tub. If you get uncomfortable at any point, let me know and I can stop or do something else."
It wasn't like you've never seen a naked body before. You've seen plenty both in your sex life and field of work. You've even seen parts of Natasha's body when you've treated her. You just never thought you'd see Natasha fully naked. 
You slid your jacket off her shoulders, letting out a puff of breath. You looked past her as you undid the string of her hospital gown. You looked up when you slid down her underwear before guiding her towards the tub. Your gentle guiding seemed to spark Natasha into mechanically climbing into it herself the rest of the way. 
"Okay, cool. Um," you stuttered. "I'm sure you've been through a lot. Once you're done, we can get you into bed and if you're hungry later, I can make you something."
You were getting used to the lack of answers, but it didn't make your stomach drop any less. "Just let me know if you need anything."
You don't wait for a response this time, leaving without shutting the door fully. Down the hall, you leaned against the wall, swallowing harshly. 
It feels like you brought a lifeless shell home. A part of you wonders if Natasha really did return or if this was just some lifeless doll. 
You didn't want to think about it anymore, so you pushed yourself off the wall and into a bedroom with a suitcase and unzipped it open to grab some clothes.
When you were heading back, you heard the water still running and frowned. 
"Natasha?" You called as you opened the door. The tub was overfilling, and you rushed to turn off the faucet, trying to not slip.
Natasha was sitting how you left her, staring ahead at the running water but not really looking at it.
You sighed, relieved that the bathroom floor was designed with wood and curved so that any water would naturally run towards a drain in the floor. 
You go to check the temperature of the water and find that while it was initially fine when you turned it on, Natasha hadn't attempted to adjust it, and the finicky faucet ran nearly scalding water. 
"Jesus, Natasha, you're going to hurt yourself," you yelped. You braced through it and stuck your hand in to drain the tub halfway.
You inwardly sighed, knowing you would have to help Natasha through the entire process. You began to refill the tub, monitoring the temperature and shut it off when it was filled adequately. 
"I'm going to help wash you if that's okay," you muttered. "Just let me know if you prefer to do it yourself at any point."
You grabbed a nearby stool and sat on it before grabbing the loofa. You began with Natasha's shoulders and arms, trying to wash parts of her that were easy to access.
Natasha tensed as you washed her, so you tried to be more slow and careful. 
"It's just me," you said softly, trying to reassure the redhead. "I've always taken care of you."
Natasha said nothing, but her shoulders relaxed slightly as you continued. There wasn't much dirt on her, but the stale air that was surrounding her began to fade away. 
Her knees were propped up, folded to her chest, and you washed down her thighs and legs, trying to not think of anything too much as you did it. You tried not to think about the scars on her hands and feet. 
Readjusting your stool, you went to sit behind her. You used a cup to wet Natasha's hair, trying to detangle some of it gently first. It was then you discovered a shaven spot in the back of her head, where there was a large scar. You realized that was where Natasha's head hit the ground when she—
You swallowed, trying to suppress the anger that they shaved her head to get a look at something so private. 
You squeezed a considerable amount of shampoo in your hands and gently rubbed it into her scalp. Natasha tensed at first before your fingers massaging her scalp made her relax, her body leaning back against the tub and her head into your hands. 
It was quiet as you did this. You shampooed her hair twice before slathering it up in conditioner and finally getting out the rest of the knots. You drained the tub, grabbing the shower head to rinse her down once more before you grabbed a towel and helped her out. 
You helped put a bathrobe around her to help dry her as you didn't think you had the gall to fully dry every part of her by hand. Grabbing her clothes, you led her to her bedroom, setting her down on the bed. 
Natasha sat silently as you towel-dried her hair with gentle hands. Her eyes fell closed as you began to blow dry it. Your soft fingers tousling her hair. 
So delicate. 
When it was dry, you set the blow dryer aside. 
"Hm, your hair is pretty sensitive and might be for the next week. It might be better to braid it so it doesn't tangle and break when you're sleeping," you commented, mostly to yourself. 
You took sections of her hair, delicately beginning to put her hair into a french braid. 
"You've always had beautiful hair, red or blonde," you complimented Natasha as you finished. You moved to sit in front of her to check if you did okay from the front. There wasn't a response, but Natasha opened her eyes. They focused on you, looking at you as they traced over the features of your face. She was studying you apprehensively. 
Natasha lifted a hand, slowly reaching up as her fingers brushed the side of your face. It felt bumpy from the scars, but it made the back of your throat burn. 
"Am I really here?" Natasha mumbled as she then traced your cheek before your lips. "Am I really here with you?"
Your eyes were burning now. You couldn't even answer right away because you were afraid your lips would start trembling. 
You lifted your hand, hesitating at first, before you held her hand against your face. "Yeah, you're really here."
The edges of Natasha's eyes began to brim with tears. 
"When I jumped, I didn't die right away," Natasha whispered. "There was a feeling that something bad was going to happen. It didn't get me yet, but it was going to."
You couldn't help the tears that began to fall over the edge of your eyes when they overfilled. 
"Something bad happened to me," Natasha's lip trembled. "It's still happening to me."
You gripped her hand tighter unintentionally, but it was like it grounded Natasha. 
"I was scared," Natasha admitted. "I was scared that even if you came to me, it wouldn't go away."
Then, Natasha grabbed your hand and placed it against her cheek. It was still warm from the bath and blow dryer. 
"But I can feel your touch," Natasha sighed like it was a relief. "It's gentle and I feel human. I'm scared I'm not really here."
"You are."
Your throat felt clogged with raw emotions, and you didn't know what to do with it. You've only seen Natasha a handful of times, and maybe it's because the more you do, the more emotionally charged you both feel. 
"You're really here," you told Natasha, using your thumb to caress her cheek. You didn't know what else to say. 
All you can do is offer her shelter under your touch.
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annaesterella · 6 months ago
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What if.. Darling just decided to sacrifice herself for the Batfam, and after that, she starts going into an loop of sacrifices for them, again and again.
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“𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯.. 𝘋𝘖 𝘐𝘛 𝗔𝗚𝗔𝗜𝗡”
𝘞𝘢𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴: Obsession, unhealthy habits, time loop, manipulation, yan themes, yandere undertones, yan-platonic bat family, romantic- yan Jason Todd --- English is not my first language, consider it (por favor)
Fem reader
Batfam is cray cray, they see you as their daughter(sis) in law, and Jason sees you as his lover (HE GOT THE BIGGER TOOTH PICK AND HE IS SO HAPPY BECAUSE OF IT)
Kid- Damian ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀Dad- Bruce
Teen- Tim ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀Brother: Dick
Alfred - granpa ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀Sister, family friends, animals: Cass, Duke,Steph and Babs, Alfred the cat and Titus.
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Again.. when did it all started? Well.. it started.. a 500 loops ago, it was.. at first an act of "accidental" sacrifice. A child, who she didn't know, being used as a hostage by some other stupid villain, she decided it would be "lovely" to give up on her life, which was already ready to end, after all, a child should live a happy and peaceful life, her life was already on her..? Fuck.. she doesn't remember, but still, he should live, live the life she couldn't; then she did it, she jumped, got herself shot and saw the world burn as the great Dark Knight and his lil hero frienda showed up. She smiled, as she looked up at the little kid. Slowly, she saw herself walking towards a door, only to feel some strong hands on her shoulders, pulling her back, she looked back only to see herself again in the mirror, again, as if what she done didn't happen, as if it was just a shitty dream of her dying, she got up, dressed up and went to her.. life? As if she could call *It* that way, haha..
The day seemed the same, just some things different, maybe it was all a dream after all, but still, it felt really..soft to be dead, she wouldn't kill herself, but still... Comfortable, then again, she heard a crash, looking in the way of the loud noise, as if the dream was becoming real, the difference is that this time it was and old man, and a building breaking behind him. She widened her eyes, running to the old man, she helped him to get out of there, only to look behind and see that large building making a shadow, she looked at the old man that screamed to her to get out of there, only to hear the deafening sound of silence and a thin sound, she smiled, before closing her eyes again, and seeing the door, she walked towards It, only to feel that rough hands pulling her back again, she again looked back, only to see the door and the room, before waking up again. She was now unsure if it was *again* just a dream
Again the day seemed the same, again just some silly things were different, she looked at the clock, 10:00.. an loud crash and an teen boy screamed at the top of his lungs, she looked at his way and saw a villain, threatening the boy while hurting his arm with something that seemed like a dagger.. she then grabbed some thing and with all her rage and strengh she tossed it on his head, she only saw the last 10 seconds, the villain letting the teen go, and going towards her, all very slowly, she just looked at the teen, screaming at her to get out, but again, she just smiled and then she just heard again that deafening sound, the door, and she runned towards It again, but then, she fell, feeling someone, of something, drag her again. *Again* she woke up, tired, but still.. what If she didn't got out the house? No.. she wanted to see what would happen now.
And That's how we ended up on this Goddamn loop. Again, but why she can't just die? Why she must come back every time? Who pulls her back? Who are those people who she saves? Does she know them? Would she know them if she lived? Would she? She saved all of them, *all of them* The kid, the dad, the brother, the sister, the friends, the granpa, even animals! all of them, in loops, she even tried to get their names, but it was always too fast, too late, but still, who pulled her back? Why she couldn't pass through the door?
There she was.. their little star, their lil savior.. still, it felt so.. mean of them to let her die, after the 10th time, Alfred had to stop going, or he wouldn't be capable to look at her without feeling guilty when it was their time to rescue her, his lil grand-daughter-in-law, it was how he would call her, again, they looked at her by some window, the window of that room, the one she can't get in, not without their help. Today it was his first and last time getting saved before they got her, after all, they already knew their little star, she saw them 499 times before this one, today it was the day of her lover, the one who picked up the bigger toothpick and got to be her soon-to-be fiancé, She is not his lil star, she is his sun, the one he must pull back to save them, again, to be saved. He got ready, jumping into the reality, seeing all her daily rotine, before seeing 10:00 on the big clock, he then heard a bomb and saw her running towards him, ready to save him, then he perked up, not giving a single care in the world about the bomb, only about his goddess, his sun.
She stopped dead in her tracks when she saw someone new, who was he? Still, she had to save him, when she heard the tick tock, it all clicked on her mind, she ran to him, as if slow motion, trying to get him out of there, only to get picked up by him, finally, something different happened, when she saw she didn't die, she saw the bank exploding and all, but she didn't die, SHE DIDN'T DIE! She started sobbing, as she saw Batman and his family flying through the air to fight the villains, as she cried in the arms of the big, tall stranger, hugging him as he walked, not seeing where he was taking her. She again fell asleep, she saw the door, and didn't try to walk towards It, again crying as she thought she died again, in the arms of her "savior" but then, the door opened, she felt that same strong hands around her, this time caressing her hand and in her waist, as she walked towards the door, she saw all of them, the people who she saved, in some kind of living room, waiting for her, with open arms, as the person behind her leaned in, saying in her ear, before kissing her cheek and snuggling in her neck, as she looked at his dark curls with an white streak.
“𝗪𝗲𝗹𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗲,𝘠/𝘕, 𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘵𝘭𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳.. ”
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reidspharb · 1 year ago
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The Moment I Knew
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*Part two
Summary: Spencer misses your 25th birthday and that’s when you realize your relationship can’t be fixed.
Word count: 800 or something idk ICBA shes a short one
Warnings: angst, Reid is a shitty boyfriend in this one
Note: hi this was written at 3 am and I’m new to writing so if this sucks sorry anyways but I got this idea from Taylor Swifts song by the Same name and I thought I would write it so yeah enjoy
Sure, you were so happy all your friends were there and everyone was having a good time… but you couldn’t help but think about Spence.
It was 10 pm, the party started at 8 and he still wasn’t there like he promised. You couldn’t help but think about him coming through the door right now, gifts in hand as he did on your last birthday with that baby I’m right here smile.
You knew he couldn’t be here, and you knew how much he valued his work, but, he wasn’t even on a case far away… he was here, in Virginia, and he couldn’t even call to wish you a happy birthday.
Your eyes were locked on the door most of the time as you socialized. People asked about him, about your relationship, and the most you could give them was a sad smile and a dishonest word about how great everything was going.
“So how have you been,” your friend Sarah said as she laughed and took a sip of her drink “I mean I feel like I haven’t seen you in forever!”
you plastered on the brightest fake smile you could and mustered up an answer just normal enough to get you by.
“I've been okay, you know, with work and everything.”
All you could think about was him, how he said he would be there. He told you- no he promised you weeks in advance that he would be here. But he’s not.
You felt stupid, standing there all dolled up in your tight black dress and red lipstick. You thought maybe if you dressed up nice he would make sure to be there, but then again, there you were with no one to impress.
You knew it was hopeless, there you were on your birthday staring at the door and watching the clock tick as everyone around you danced and laughed. You looked around the room, trying to spot him in the crowd but who were you fooling, you knew he wasn’t there.
As you listened to your loved ones sing happy birthday around you, you could only hear his voice in your memory. When you blew out those candles your only wish was for him to be there with you. You should’ve been so happy, but he was the one thing missing.
Then it was 1 am, and you were barely tipsy. you already had a nervous stomach, you knew drinking would only make it worse. By now you were sick of everyone being around you, you just wanted to be alone. You stumbled to the bathroom over some discarded red cups and locked yourself in there, tears burning at your eyes when you saw yourself in the mirror.
You did your makeup the way he liked it too so that if you sent pictures he really wouldn’t miss it, such a naive thing to think you told yourself. You heard a knock on your door and there were your two best friends, Tegan and Oliver, mixed with the emotions of seeing them staring at you with so much pity in their eyes and Spencer being away made you break down.
Tegan held you as you sobbed, mascara dripping down your cheeks with every tear.
“He said- he said he would be here…”
“I'm so sorry, love bug, I wish I could grab him and rip him into pieces. You deserve so much better.” Said Oliver, holding your cold hands.
You felt so embarrassed, sitting there in front of your friends crying about some stupid boy. But he was the one who meant the most to you and he wasn’t there.
The next morning you woke up on your couch, head pounding. Your apartment was trashed, there were plastic cups scattered all over the room. As you stepped over them to get ready for the day, you felt a sharp pain in your chest as you heard Spencer’s familiar ringtone playing from your phone.
“Hey doll, it’s me” he sighed on the other line of the phone.
“Hi, Spencer.” You mumbled. You knew it would hurt to say his whole name instead of the nickname you’d been calling him since the day you met him.
“I'm so sorry I didn’t make it babe I was caught up in paperwork and I lost tra-“ you interrupted his rambling, you didn’t care anymore.
“It’s fine. I’ll talk to you later Spencer.” You hissed into the phone before hitting the red button on the screen and setting your phone back down on the counter.
That was the moment you knew.
That was the moment you knew that this would never work out.
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angelsdxmise · 4 months ago
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Haunt me.
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sum: Bakugou is not a good boyfriend.
Contains: readers short story of how she spiraled due to her affiliation with bkg
warnings: mentions of suicide, bakugou hurts u once, angst, no comfort, profanity, you hurt yourself somewhat, reader goes insane, not proofread sorry
a/n: 1k words technically.. send me requests and consider reblawging 😝
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Your eye twitches as you hear your boyfriend's name.Yes, how lucky you were. Just keep remembering- keep remembering that he didn’t set his eyes on anyone else. Those lucky girls didn’t know what it was like, so you were technically saving them.
Due to your accidental sacrifice, your eyebags grew heavier and your false smile improved, which fooled everyone around. You sat on your bed as your nails dug into the flesh of your face. All you wanted to do was cry and scream.
You stopped once you felt a warm liquid trickle down your face and drip onto your thighs. You slowly pulled your hands back and stared at them. It’s not like it was marriage, you could just leave.
But then again, you couldn’t. What would you do without him, what would he say? What would everyone else say? It’s only so much time before you’d be free, right? Or maybe, just maybe he planned to unintentionally save you and break up with you himself.
That never happened. It would never happen because suddenly, he cared what people thought. The nail-indented scars left on your forehead raised questions from your classmates, but you dismissed them with a smile.
You wanted to drown yourself in lava when you truly realized you were going to be the cause of your own death. You had a run in with a villain and made your way back to the dorms, unable to even walk as you crawled through the dorm halls. Thankfully, it was late so nobody would see you.
Your pupils were blown wide as your fingers clutched the skin around your wound, the blood pouring out of you endlessly. Bakugou must have been awake and smelt your state as he opened his door and looked down at you. Pools of tears were beneath you as you held your head down, silently begging to be let in.
He granted you your wish, and hoisted you onto his bathroom counter. Saliva leaked out your mouth and snot ran down your nose as you groaned in pain, unable to form a single word.
“Clean up yourself, and stop getting your shitty problems all over my fucking bathroom. You’re disgusting.” You heard. Bakugou sounded like your own personal torture demon as threw a rag at your face, then shut the bathroom door.
You wondered what he would think if you really had lost it. Your teeth dug into the rag as your fingers pierced your wound, blood escaping from the gaps. Your eyes rolled upwards as your sobs were silent and painful. You removed your hands from your wound, and gripped your hair tightly before shoving your face in your knees and tugging at it in despair.
Bakugou really was a bad boyfriend. Maybe they were right, how could I have gotten into a relationship with him? You wanted to die, but refused as you had one singular thing to look forward to in life.
As you sluggishly made an attempt to move, you flinched as you heard the door slam open, revealing Bakugou. “God damn it, what’d I tell you..” He growled as he walked towards you, a venomous glare in his face that you saw as nothing but evil.
He ripped the rag from your hands as his own were placed on your sides. He wrapped it around your torso and tightened it to put pressure so it’d at least stop bleeding. He noticed your pathetic state, and it seemed to have made him angrier.
It didn’t seem so, you knew it did. The fear never left you from that moment, the moment his quirk had gone off while his palm was still on your skin. Thank the gods it wasn’t a full explosion, but the heat was so intense it had left a burn mark on your skin. You shrieked in pain as you used your legs to kick him off you.
He didn’t respond, and his usual frown didn’t leave his face. “Oh my god..” You faintly said. As you ran your hand over the scar, some of your skin had melted off and stuck to you. You nearly barfed as you darted out of his dorm. He stood there in shock with his head down, remembering what he had just done. He was in a top hero school, and he made the moves of a villain.
It didn’t matter anyway. In your world, he was Satan himself. He haunted your dreams every night, and even years later, after you’ve left U.A. due to them denying a request to change classes after you refused to provide a reason, you still hear his voice.
His voice that commanded you to do things you didn’t want to, but he forced you to keep his reputation and ego fully stocked. His scar was faded, but some parts were still a slight red.
You smashed your TV to bits and pieces, your apartment nearly being fully turned over at the destruction that had just occurred. A nightmare, the worst one had followed you everywhere you went. He was praised, and when it came on your TV, your mind faded away as you didn’t process what happened next.
You came back to yourself laying on glass shards, most likely from a plate or glass, in your kitchen. The dishes and cabinets were destroyed, and the fridge no longer had its familiar buzz. Some of the glass shards had pierced your skin, making you wince everytime you shifted around.
You’d never be free, and you never gave yourself another four years to mentally recover as you reached the top of your favorite building. You did enjoy it at U.A., classes were full of life and provided you with much entertainment. But even as you fell, he followed you down. As much as you wished he did—
He never died with you.
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songmingisthighs · 1 year ago
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Feelings, Feelings
group : ateez
pairing : wooyoung × reader (platonic)
genre : oneshot, hurt/comfort
wc : 1.4 k
warning : shitty friends lmao
a/n : requested by anon
buy me coffee ?
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You were not in the best mood and it showed.
The people who woukd usually greet and talk to you seem to avoid you because you looked like you didn't want to be bothered. If the look on your face didn't give it away, your hastened pace and rigid body language absolutely did.
See, you weren't having a bad day. You were actually on the verge of an emotional breakdown. It all started about a week ago when your group of friends talked about going for a night out, bar hopping or clubbing or something and they talked over you completely. One person actually had the decency to ask your opinion directly while the others only said things like 'oh she wouldn't like that' 'that's so not (y/n)' 'she'd just be in the corner being a bummer' and more. While you do realize they were just joking around and trying to be funny, it hurt you that they'd just talk FOR you. Sure, you really didn't like their plans but it HAD been a while since all of you met up and hung out.
So imagine your surprise to see your friends posting a picture of their drinks on their social media accounts.
You stood frozen in the middle of the grocery store when you saw one of their Instagram stories and you even had to sit in a corner as you scroll through your group chat that had been practically dead for 2 days, wanting to see if you missed any updates because as far as you know, they were only talking about a plan and not making actual plans. Now you know why those bitches were so fucking silent.
"Well, well, well, if it isn't 703," Wooyoung called, snickering to himself as he sidled up next to you who was waiting for the elevator. Usually, you wouldn't mind the younger guy because you had been used to his voice. How can you not? The first day you saw him was when he moved in for college. You had just finished your first week of internship and he had accidentally bumped into you. Literally, he dropped a thermos on your foot which prompted you to cry in front of a very confused and panicked 17 year old Wooyoung. Though he was unsure, he sat his boxes aside and just sat there while listening to you rant about how he shouldn't grow up, get out of college, and just go back to his parents' house because working and being independent was so overrated. Rather than focusing on how you were spewing your guts to a complete stranger, Wooyoung was more focused on why a 20 year old sounded like she had gone through 4 divorces and a public scandal.
It was odd how you were able to be vulnerable with him and it was even more odd to find him in front of your door that night with two packs of ramyeon and a huge grin on his face. He confessed he had bothered approximately every apartment on floors 1-6 and half of floor 7 looking for you because he wanted to make sure you were okay. You should've been embarrassed that a guy who's practically a child had to come and comfort you but you didn't. He made you feel comfortable.
Unlike now.
"Go away Wooyoung, I'm not in the mood," you sighed, shifting the grocery bags in your hands slightly. Wooyoung didn't listen, however, instead, he leaned his shoulder on the wall and ducked his head to meet your eyes which you avoided, "I thought you would've been busy with your friends tonight or something. I had to rethink of a new plan to make a move on you!" He teased.
The mention of your friends and hanging out, your blood boiled and your grip on the grocery bags tightened. "Wooyoung," you warned, jaw tightening as you felt your eyeballs burn. "I'm just saying, I thought my sexy little noona would've been out and about," he grinned innocently (despite the words he used).
You dropped your grocery bags and turned around, making way to the stairs. "Whoah, wait!" Wooyoung grabbed your hand and turned you around, "What's wrong?" He said with furrowed eyebrows, genuinely confused as to why you acted that way. He was even more confused when you yanked your hand off his grip and saw tears welling in your eyes.
"You can seriously shove whatever it is you think of me down your throat, Wooyoung," was all you said before you trodded upstairs to your floor.
It was a mistake for you to do that because once you finally made it, you were panting and the blurriness in your eyes was not only caused by your tears but also from the exercise. So you weren't sure if the sight of Wooyoung in front of your apartment was real or a hallucination. He even had your groceries in his hands.
"Go home, Woo," you sighed, sniffling as you fumble for your keys in your bag. This time he wasn't as vocal, only shrugging until you opened your door and slipped in together with you despite your clear expression of annoyance but you still let him in. You both were silent as you removed your shoes and settled your things, Wooyoung helping put things away which was how he noticed you buying your favourite cereal and milk, a comfort "dinner" for whenever you felt like your life was on the verge of tipping into pure chaos and you just don't have any time and energy to give a fuck about crap like dinner. "I'm not going to entertain you, Woo," you stated, voice cracking slightly as tears welled up in your eyes again all the while you tried to busy yourself by putting things away.
You hadn't noticed it initially but when you turned to kick him out again, you saw him with a bowl of your cereal and a soft smile on his face. "If what you need is me out, then I will go but not until I see you eat," he stated, putting the bowl on your counter and sauntering over to pull you so he could sit you down to eat.
In your head, you knew how ashamed you were for needing Wooyoung who's around 3 years younger than you to take care of you. But it felt nice to be tended to for once. Amongst your friends who were around the same age as or older than you, you were always expected to keep things together because they don't really have the time or energy to deal with what they labelled as "personal bullshit". Or maybe they're just a bunch of bitches dressed in fake prada and cheap jewellery that were slowly turning green with each wear. Wooyoung had once expressed how he doesn't like your friends because of what they were saying about you to your face even in front of him who was a stranger to them but they didn't seem to care. Heck, they seem to enjoy being annoying, catty bitches.
Thinking that you weren't going to eat in front of him, Wooyoung smiled and squeezed your hand once before turning to leave but this time, you stopped him. You grabbed him by the arm and with quivering lips, you looked up at him, "D-do you think y-you can accompany me eat on the couch? I-I think I'm gonna need company," you asked.
Without hesitation, Wooyoung nodded and pulled you into a gentle and warm hug. "Can this 'company' include watching A Man Called Otto? Because San watched it without me and he cried so I wanted to know if the movie was really THAT sad or if he was just being a bitch," he pulled away just as he heard you chuckling and felt you nodding, "Only if you have a bowl of cereal with me."
As you watched Wooyoung busy himself with getting his own bowl of cereal and making both of you comfortable on your couch, you realized that it was stupid of you to have been upset to be left behind by your supposed friends. Sure, it sucks to be singled out and heard how your friends make you sound so lame. But honestly? Being in your own home with Wooyoung loudly commenting about the movies as you spoon cereal and milk into your mouth, you wouldn't have it any other way.
network :
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taglist :
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creedslove · 10 months ago
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JOEL TAKING CARE OF YOU WHEN YOU HAVE PROBLEMS WITH YOUR MOM 🍓 - HEADCANONS
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No outbreak!Joel Miller x f!reader
A/N: this is so personal it hurts, my relationship with my mother is terrible and today was one of the days she pushed me to the edge and I thought I was going to explode with negative feelings until I broke down and I sobbed. Also, just proving my point that my life problems would decrease by half if I were married to Joel Miller 😢
TW: Shitty mom
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• Joel knows damn well the reason why people often tell mean mother-in-law jokes or why their reputation is so bad; and the truth is that it is not even because of the way your mom treats him, but because of how she treats you
• it just infuriates Joel at the same time it breaks his heart to see what she does to you; the way she's so manipulative and mean, the way she acts innocent after saying the worst things a mom could say to a daughter and pretend she didn't really mean that way, or you are overreacting
• and it absolutely shatters his heart to see that even after all the emotional pain she puts you through, he sees how you somehow look for her approval affection, no matter if he has already told you to ignore her, he knows it's deeper than that, it's just the result of a lifetime of emotional damage she's done
• being unable to help you more effectively, he does what he can: he holds you, he soothes you, dries your tears and reminds you you are more than what your mom says, he reminds you he knows you are telling the truth and that you aren't just overreacting, he knows that whenever she says "it wasn't that bad" it was indeed that bad and whenever she insists on saying that whatever traumatic experience she caused you she doesn't remember because it never happened, he is aware it left a deep scar on your mental health
• and even if Joel thinks this is not very effective at all, he has no idea of how precious and important this is to you, because it validates your feelings, it shows you you aren't alone, it shows that you are respected as an adult and overall as a person, it shows you that he loves you, the good kind of love, not the supposed kind of love that burns your mom insists on giving you
• Joel doesn't give a shit if your mom says she has anxiety or whatever other crap she uses as an excuse, no mental problem in the world gives anyone the right to treat another person, let alone a daughter, the way she treats you; it doesn't matter if she wants to pass as mentally unstable, he can see right through it, she is only unstable when it's convenient for her, so that leaves Joel with another adjective for her: cruel
• he knows your relationship with her has ups and downs, sometimes you are able to spend the whole day together shopping or just hanging out and having fun, but there are days she makes a living hell out of your mind
• and even if Joel isn't the most educated guy in psychology, he knew it wasn't healthy to bottle up these feelings like you often did, because sometimes you would explode
• and today was one of those days: something small suddenly became a huge thing and before you knew it, your mom was already screaming at you as if you were a child, making you feel worse and worse and all that rage you had bottled up exploded, because you were so tired of having to walk on eggshells, never knowing if you would have an easy day or if you'd have your mental health ruined again
• so when Joel got home from work, he immediately noticed something was off; you were sniffling and trying to hide your red puffy eyes, you were so sad and you'd completely lost your appetite and the moment he questioned you what had happened - having a pretty good idea of what you were going to say, you simply broke down and sobbed
• and at that moment he didn't think of anything else other than holding you into his arms, his body was so warm and comfortable and you felt relieved to have a grip on him, to feel his muscles, his beard, to smell his scent, everything reminding you of what a loving person really was
"shh it's okay darling, you'll be fine, you don't have to tell me what happened, it's gonna be okay, I'm here and I believe you"
• Joel whispered against your ear and simply didn't move until you broke the hug, seemingly to calm down for a while; and not only that, while you took the relaxing shower he suggested you to, he made you tea, because cooking might not be his strongest suit, but you take such good care of him, he wants to at least pay you back a small portion of it
• even after shower, he can tell the tears are easily going to spill at any minute, so he decides not to talk about it, instead, he suggests watching something to distract you, it doesn't matter to him if it's a movie, a tv show or that low quality soap opera you found on Netflix you swear you only watch it ironically but you got too invested in it, he just wants to see you smile for a bit
• cuddles all the way while you both watch tv, even if you're not paying attention because honestly why does he like to watch cars exploding so much? but the important thing is that you love Joel and you're so thankful for everything he does for you
• and to finally finish a terrible day, you both make love, not fucking, but making love. It's slow, gentle, sexy and intimate. Exactly what you needed, a full dose of Joel to make you feel better ❤️
____
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bluespiritshonour · 7 months ago
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Another thing I've been muling over: a complain I've seen about Maiko is that she keeps him from going on the right path—and... I agree.
For Mai, Zuko's well-being is her sole concern and the rest of the world could crash and burn and that's... Okay?
Realistically speaking, your support system should NOT be one person. One thing I love about ATLA is that (despite romance writing not being one of it's strong points) the lack of ships that follow the tropes.
Kataang is not an archetype. Neither is Sukka or Maiko.
Having your support system be just your romantic partner isn't healthy (for them or for you) or realistic. But most romances do that and until I watched ATLA it didn't occurred to me that that's not a good thing.
ATLA and Maiko are very realistic in that Zuko needs both the Gaang and Mai. He needs the Gaang to hold him accountable for every shitty little thing he did—and he needs Mai there to keep from spiraling and self-destruction.
Zuko and his uncle were de facto conquerors, so they had to do much more to redeem themselves than Mai and Ty Lee (mere soldiers, but NOT innocent) had to.
Zuko had to work hard to earn the Gaang's forgiveness (personal opinion: he should've grovelled more and he should've been called out on his racism against Aang) and Uncle Iroh reconquered Ba Sing Se in the name of it's people.
They both did reparations to the very people they hurt. And their crimes were much more direct and vicious compared to Mai and Ty Lee’s.
As someone not as responsible as them, Mai and Ty Lee's redeeming themselves was at the Boiling Rock.
And well, when Zuko is Firelord right after the war—he would be paying for the crimes of his ancestors. He needs the Gaang there to keep from acting like he did with Katara pre-Southern Raiders (everyone else seems to have forgiven me!) and he needs Mai to keep himself from actually spiralling into self-destruction and undeserved guilt (Sozin's and Ozai's faults aren't his even if he's paying for it and someone needs to remind him that)
So, yeah. He needs them both for different things.
As for Mai, her conflict was that she was never allowed to express herself. And loving Zuko made up for that—she finally stands up for something she believes in (not in the cause, but in Zuko) and Zuko didn't even have to do anything beside exist. He didn't “fix her.”
Although, again I do have the the complain that Mai has to do a lot of emotional labour for him and if you really are gonna shit on Maiko: it's Zuko who needs to step up, not Mai—well, Mai tried to “fix him” and she couldn't!
That's so important to me!—I’m tired of girl fixes boy narrative. And she couldn't fix him because only he could fix himself and Mai herself is used to making the best out of a situation and being selfish/passive/choosing the path of least resistance. She tried to do to Zuko what worked for her (or maybe didn't, considering she was coping)—and well—later when Zuko's Firelord it'll be Mai who keeps him from harming himself.
Zuko needs both to be balanced out.
He needs multiple people to act as support system and that's both healthy and realistic. Mai isn't everything and neither should she be.
I know what the comics did; don't bring them up here. It's not about the comics.
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dontmixpaintinyourcoffee · 11 months ago
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Rewatching Yellow Jacket, I can't help but really appreciate how the main trio are written, especially in regards to money. I feel like the easy way to go would be to have a story about greed, forgetting where you came from, ego, blah blah blah. That's the cliche cake you get from the ingredients set up in the first act. But I really, really love that they didn't go that way. Hannah doesn't want money for luxury. She won't say no to it, but her primary motivation is entirely about making Lex happy. There's no bullshit about how money can't buy happiness, because it kind of can. Not happiness directly, but it can sure as fuck buy security, stability, and resources. Ethan has never seen anything close to 100k in his life. And then what they do with a quarter of it is, objectively, irresponsible. Because they're still kids. What would be treated as frivolous in a less compassionate story is vital to these characters. They buy games and toys and ice cream, fill the house with arcade cabinets and a bounce house. Ethan gets so excited that he forgets to get a bed for himself and Lex, but he gets Hannah an extravagant water bed because he loves the kid with all his heart.
Lex has been working shitty minimum wage jobs since she was 16. She had to drop out of high school because she literally couldn't afford to not work for those 8 hours a day. She takes all the hours she can get, she sells whatever she can get her hands on, she takes the consequences onto herself, she takes the snide remarks, she takes the verbal abuse, she takes all of it because she refuses to let Hannah suffer the way Pam did. The hyper-awareness of money bleeds over to Hannah too, no matter how much Lex tries to protect her from it. She knows that a child should never have to worry about bills and medical expenses and if food is gonna be on the table tomorrow, and she doesn't want Hannah to feel the same anxieties that she does. But still, this kid, on her birthday, sees a tablet she could win, and her first thought is that she could sell it. Because fun is a luxury, and she knows it.
So Ethan blowing 25k on games and pizza and candy- it's not silly to them. It's not frivolous. He's giving them both, but especially Lex, the childhood that was taken from them. That was taken by late stage capitalism, and poverty, and a school system that let them slip through the cracks, and an abusive, negligent parent. It's not the most responsible thing in the world, but it's not about the games or the junk food. It's about the ability to eat the junk food and have time to play the games. It's about Lex not having to feel guilty for spending the day with her sister when she could be working. It's about being able to stay up late for Hannah's 15th birthday, because she doesn't have to take a shift the next day. It's about having the time and energy to study and pass the test without entirely burning herself out and hurting the people around her. It's about these three people finally, finally having the resources to feel real, safe, full joy in their lives, and more.
Thank you for joining me on this week's episode of Why This Scene Of Two Twenty-Somethings Sleeping In A Bounce House Made Me Cry, and now back to Dan with the weather-
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punkymaysnark · 5 months ago
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Father's Day is such a rough time for the Warriors of Hope, even after adoption...
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Nobody's in a worse mood than Masaru. All he can think about is how he spent the first ten years of his life in constant pain and fear. Trapped in a shitty dark house. Being forced to steal beer. Always hurting somewhere. There were days he was even denied food, or forced to sleep in the backyard. He touches the bandaid on his cheek. Under that bandaid is the cigarette burn he was given to scare him into never speaking the truth about his treatment. Just by touching it, he can still smell the smoke coming off that cigarette. Why should that...that bastard get his own day? He was rotting in prison where he belonged, but the damage to Masaru's psyche is done. He's sitting on his bed, clutching his stuffed toy, back facing the door. Yasuhiro tries to reach out, but his little buddy is unwilling to speak. Poor kid.
Finally, at the risk of being bitten, Yasuhiro gets the courage to walk right up to the boy, and land a hand on his shoulder. He winces, expecting Masaru to reflexively whirl around and bite. Instead, Masaru is slow, scowling at him. Hiro continues to smile. It's okay. I know he hurt you and he wouldn't stop hurting you and I'd like to have beat him up myself, but he's not here. I'm here. And I love you so much, so smile, okay? He strokes Masaru with his thumb.
Tears leak into Masaru's eyes. He whimpers. When it was the first weeks here, and Masaru was sick, cold, and utterly terrified, Hiro didn't give up trying to break through his trauma. This is the man who showed Masaru who a dad should be. He held Masaru in his lap and cuddled him for an entire evening. Masaru turns all the way around. Hiro understands the signal and scoops him.
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Jataro feels empty. He never saw Dad. Dad must've walked out when he was born. Dad hated him. His whole life, his only exposure to fathers was hearing Masaru and Kotoko rant about their own. He doesn't really know what to do about it. Despondent, he finally settles in Kazuichi's lap while the Ultimate Mechanic is performing his weekly assignment. Kazuichi is nice. Kazuichi...he's kind of like a dad. Kazuichi won't walk out on him and leave him alone. Jataro remembers Kazuichi's look of sympathy when they met the first time, even if it was when Jataro still wore that hideous mask. Kazuichi smiles and gives the boy a light scratching on the cheek. It seems that, after such a rocky start, Jataro finally accepts him as a father figure. And he deserves one. He deserves all the loving family figures in the world. Kazuichi looks back proudly on how he kept showing the little guy affection and concern, and never gave up. His only regret is that he didn't figure out sooner how bad Jataro's abuse had been.
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Kotoko is in a similar sour mood to Masaru, but she's better at swallowing it. Papa's in prison. She hopes he stays in prison until he's old and rotting. Speaking of rotting, did you know that rotting things are good for plants and bugs? Yeah. Maybe she'll plant some flowers with Kirumi today.
Papa can't hurt her...but the scars he left on her can. The way he forced her to earn money for the family. That ugly, smelly bed she was forced to stay on. That garish room with no escape. She's shaking. Papa's shadow is still clouding her vision. She still feels his hands on her shoulders sometimes, like right now. She still feels that loose clothing she was forced to wear. Helplessness. She gets the choking feeling of pure helplessness. Fortunately, Gonta notices her staring into space, trembling, mumbling under her breath. Gonta gentleman. When she starts to get a panic attack, Gonta knows to gently press a wet towel on Kotoko's forehead and keep it there. Gonta reminds her where she is. The little girl returns to reality. She is safe. She is truly loved here. Papa is in prison miles away from her. Patient and caring people like Gonta are here to protect her now, and they'll see her through the damage Papa did to her. She gives him an appreciative smile, works her hand into his, and they go outside together. Outside to find rotting things good for plants and bugs.
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Nagisa lays on his desk. Father. No matter how safe and loved he is in the academy's walls, it doesn't change how badly he failed his father. And now Father's in prison, too. Why did Nagisa run away from him in the first place? He had such high expectations for Nagisa, only for his own son to ruin everything. With a resigned moan, he slumps over the spelling words he was reviewing and tries not to cry. Byakuya takes notice, and rolls his eyes. How many times has he told Nagisa about his posture? Not that the boy could help but think of his birth father today, he supposed. He gently grips Nagisa by the shoulders and pulls him up straight, fixing his scarf.
Byakuya knows that expression well. Nagisa is worrying about Byakuya giving him expectations again. No, Nagisa. He will never stoop to the level of your father. He'll be here for you, unlike that scum. Byakuya gestures to the cup of tea left for Nagisa. Relax. You're almost done with your work, and you're doing well. He sits next to the boy with his own weekly task in his lap. We'll finish our work together. Nagisa's little hair sprigs perk up, as do the corners of his lips. Byakuya doesn't smile, but Nagisa's learned to detect the approving warmness in the Affluent Prodigy's eyes.
Byakuya hadn't believed that he would want a child in his custody. But on that day, back then, when he realized he was seeing his own childhood self within the lonely, anxious Nagisa, everything fell into place.
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Monaca is taken along with Makoto and Komaru to see their parents. She's scared. She tried to kill their parents. She doesn't know how to act for loving parents. She doesn't know if they'll give any love to her. Not that she deserves any. Hmph. Maybe she should try to kill them again. After all, Monaca's parents rejected her, why should she accept the Naegis' parents? During the ride, Makoto keeps giving her little gestures of affection. He's been so proud of her rehabilitation, but it was inevitable that she would slip back into her former personality on days like this. Komaru keeps gazing nervously at Monaca, what if she does snap and try something? She trusts her brother, but she also trusts her own past with Monaca. Monaca trusts her own past, too. Monaca remembers how much her papa beat down any happiness that came from his own half-daughter. Letting her do whatever she wanted just to keep her out of his hair. Hitting her. Insulting her.
But when they finally arrive at their parents' home, she finds herself swept up into the same family hug. Monaca knows these two adults are also nervous about meeting the girl who tried to destroy them, but the more they look at each other, somehow, the more relaxed they all become. After all, as their son assures, Monaca has been doing well in her rehab. Mr. Naegi asks her how she's been, if she wants anything to drink, if she can get to the bathroom all right. He pats her on the head and smiles at her. Monaca tries, but she can't feel much affection welling up in her heart. Her face is blank, which just makes him a little more nervous. Once in a while, she tries to open her mouth to speak, but...no. She just imagines everyone at the table glaring at her. Makoto is sitting next to her, speaking for her. The gentleness of his tone helps her relax, just slightly. Upon relaxing, jealousy boils inside her. He makes having a loving family look so easy.
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missmarveledsblog · 1 month ago
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Bet on it ( Bradley Bradshaw x reader ) part 7
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summary : y/n meets up with jake and bradley as she is waiting she runs into her boss and well the boys don't like him much .. they agree to help only to show up and help with making the party favors and the posters to get the kids more engaged while the whole time bradley comes to a realisation that makes him change his plans altogether.
warnings : not many slight angst but other than that it's grand
previous part
Of course  this would happen , of course the universe wanted to throw her into the situation that was going to be awkward as hell  . marcus couldn’t look at her and when he did he was like a wounded puppy .  she honestly would of flown out different ones if he had kept his mouth shut  or if her dad knew anyone else that was stationed and none were aviators .  of course when she got home there was flowers waiting for her at the door  , she felt the tears falling down her face , why was it all happening to her .  the time she thinks she can heal  and once again back in her life but it was different now it wasn’t so back and forth thing that she could handle it was fact her  heart was truly shattered this time and it wasn’t getting the chance to mend . each time she saw their faces the small pieces that would mend would fall right apart.  Now she was looking down at her phone ready to put herself in that position where she knew if it wasn’t how excited the kids would be , she wouldn’t be going through with it . 
“ she wants to meet up “ jake looked down at his phone in disbelief  at the words on his phone wanting to pinch himself to see if he wasn’t day dreaming. 
“ when , where” bradley stood almost falling over the coffee table of their  AIR BNB  . 
“ tonight that bar , you think she might hear us out ?” he asked softly  the guilt of it all taking it toll on the blonde he never meant to hurt her this band , break her trust .  hell break ups hurt less than this . 
“ i don’t know man i really don’t i screwed it all up i should of never done the stupid bet … i never should of said those things back then either , honestly i don’t even know why she agreed to love me and once more i screw it all up “ he scoffed still so angry with himself , chance after chance and he blew them all. He knew he wasn’t worthy or even close to it but that love was too strong , that need for her was burning through him  and if he could even get a sliver of a chance to be in her life again he was going to take it .  
“ we ain’t wasting it so let her talk and get it out  i mean she won’t listen not when she has points to make so let her talk , she stubborn as you but once she gets it out she will at least listen . i’m not saying she will forgive so don’t get hopes up she might just be meeting to tell us to fuck off too “ jake explained . 
“ how come you both never .. .you know” rooster asked. 
“ i love her , i love her alot but not that kind of love if that make sense , she first person to see jake then hangman , she listens  , gives advice  and on shitty days she’d make my momma’s  pie just to cheer me up “ he smiled , a pained smile rooster never seen on the usually ego filled cocky blondes face .  
Sitting in the bar was sort of well shit , the bartender gave her a free drink and sympathetic smile which was just great .  eyes scanning around  looking at different groups  all there for different reasons. Happy couples celebrating anniversaries or families celebrating their kids or just life in general .  so lost in the people watching , she wasn’t aware of the new body beside her til she turned to see her boss sitting in the seat just inches from her . 
“ Dr. mitchell it’s good to see you “ he smiled completely different from what  he was like at the hospital  almost relaxed in a sense . 
“ please call me y/n “ she smiled back although hers were force. 
“ are the rest of our team here  am i crashing some casual meeting ?” he asked looking around . 
“ oh no sir , i’m meeting with the aviators to well ..know” she nodded uneasy eyes scanning the room . 
“  please call me jack less of the sir “
“ ok si..jack sir  .. sorry “ she snorted . 
“ you came highly recommended out of all the candidate honestly in all the years of the programme we never had such a praise of skill from your work to your bedside manner “ he smiled wider. 
“ well it’s been my dream since i was little i mean helping people get better and helping those that can’t so it’s not so scary you know?” . 
“ well i look forward to what else you can do ? .. i better let you get to it  enjoy your night y/n “ he winked heading off his hand on her shoulder lingering bit longer before he left completely .  as she looked up to see both aviators looking at her boss figure heading into the crowd. 
“ stop glaring” she rolled her eyes as she flagged down the bartender . 
“ who’s that guy” bradley being the first to break the silence . 
“ not that its any of your business but that is my boss  , lets just get table i’m hungry “ she got off the stool before walking towards the dinning section . 
“ bit close to your boss “ he mumbled making her head turn to him .
“ nothing is going on like that and even if it was i’m an adult and i’m single “ she growled. 
“ keep it together bradshaw” jake hissed. 
“ sorry “ he winced and yet he couldn't shake off the jealous feeling in stomach . 
“ so you’re wondering why  i called you right ?” she asked as they both nodded . “ well thanks to marcus he suggested that you come see the kids and said boss wants me to make it happen and as much as i would rather pretend you both don’t exist well its hard to when you keep reminding me “ she rolled her eyes . 
“ we will do it,  not a problem “ rooster spoke up . 
“ do this were even i’ll forgive you and you can go back and stop trailing me around like worlds worse stalkers which honestly bob would do a better job” she scoffed. “  i will forgive but it’s gonna take me awhile to forget maybe in time we can be friends again but that’s it friends nothing more  , nothing less but you need to give me time  you both really hurt me and honestly  being mad and sad is taking too much out of me so do this , go home and let me heal in peace please “ she said a lot more softly .
“ you know it was never set up to hurt you right , it was never meant to make you feel like a joke or anything” rooster looked at her. 
“ i might see it in time but at the moment i can’t all i can see is the two people i cared most for hurt me majorly and seeing you both here keeps making that pain resurface “ she sighed . 
“ i only did it to help you both my intentions were pure darling and i miss you so much that i cried like a lot in front of him “ jake said even she couldn’t help laugh at that. 
“ he did to be honest i think our leave was only approved to stop us “ bradley snorted . 
“ wait how long is the leave ?” she asked . 
“As long as we could get you to talk to us even if it did take up the whole 30 days “ jake shrugged. 
“ wait about going home for christmas “ . 
“ i could do christmas at the base or with him” he said. 
“ oh  .. well it’s in two days meeting the kids and stuff i’ll make the poster boards and stuff just show up and then well tell them the non classified  goodstuff “ she nodded as the trio went quiet once more. 
“ this is place is cool i mean its not san diego but..” 
“ yeah i think i might stay here after the two years you know start fresh  , you don’t need to worry i already told my dad” she barely looked up at the two . 
“ that explains why ?  “ jake mumbled . “ well if it what you truly want darling i’m .. we’re happy  for you” he smiled . 
“ we are?” bradley heart fell into his stomach til he saw jakes wink. “ of course we are if it make you happy then well we are “ he covered quickly. 
“ ok lets just leave it at this i can get food later … myself so stop sending shit to my place  my neighbor said thanks for the flowers  by the way “ she stood . 
“ so your boss ?” rooster asked. 
“ is my boss  nothing more  and again if it was more none of your business “  she walked out as they followed. 
 “ lets us atleast walk you home “ jake offered . 
“ its dangerous for a woman to walking alone through the city” bradley added . 
“ i think i liked it better when you two didn’t work together” she rolled her eyes . 
“ y/n you leaving ?” a voice called . 
“ yes um sir i mean jack .. these are the aviators i was telling you about they agreed to visit the kids put on big show “ she smiled weakly . 
“ nice to meet you both .. listen i live a block or two away from you would you like to walk together ?” he asked .
“ we already… “ 
“ i’d love to thank you jack … i’ll send you both the details and see you then “ she turned walking off with her boss . 
“ i don’t like that guy “ rooster glared . 
“ for once i will agree with you chicken something up with that guy “ jake nodded. 
Of course she was spending her day off getting supplies from local craft store ready to make up signs  add something to the experience making little medals for the kids to be given out . 
She got some clips from her dad and nat to show on a projector too really make up for the lack of show and impress the board members that where going to be there . she supposed that was why her boss suddenly friendly shift to her . even when he walked her home he talked to her like an equal like a friend would which was honestly refreshing considering how rough of start she had .  maybe he was just seeing if she was as good as her recommendations stated. It also confused her how welcoming the two aviators were to her staying in new york  was , she was sure that was going to get a rise out of the two and yet they fully supported it unless they said it to make her happy but then again she wasn’t sure if she actually knew them anymore but in all said and done she missed them , really missed it wishing she could get past the betrayal to have them in her life .  she was so lost in her thoughts til the door knocked and she rushed to open it only to see them both standing there . 
“ we wanna help with the stuff “ bradley blurted out . 
“ it’s all i brought coffee” jake added holding up the take away tray . 
“ ok come in but once it’s done well go “ she nodded moving out of the way  . 
“ where can we start i’m great with cutting “ 
“ stack over there , you can paint the poster boards “ she gave a little smile as they two instantly started on their tasks.
The three barely spoke, not much that could be said that wasn’t said before so if she was giving them this they would take it . they would take the silence to be in her presence  , listen to her orders of what to do . anything she said it that moment was their sole mission because it was a step of getting her back in their life.  Yet he notice how uncomfortable she was , almost making sure to keep her distance  both physically and mentally . 
“ so where are you both staying ?” she asked  . 
“ just a little place twenty minutes from here … this place is wow” .
“ yeah its never stopping  i do miss the beach i mean the beaches here are nothing like back home” she smiled weakly. “ but i can get my fill when i visit .. i mean here i got everything else and working a head  to better goals  that’s why tomorrow you gotta be on your A game i mean it , the board is also gonna be there so i mean big boys with big pockets “ she added .
“ yeah we’ll blow their socks off plus the social media cry out will help , how did you get that clearance by the way “ jake asked .
“ i got my ways  big people in big place plus navy helping out sick kids helps them to so win for all” she shrugged. 
 “ this apartment is great very spacious “ bradley smiled . 
“ no memories either” she whispered so low but he heard her , he heard the words as they were directly jammed into his guilt ridden heart . 
“ hope your happy here , honestly i do “ was all he said standing and leaving it all felt hopeless , maybe it was better if he did let go , he hurt her too much to the point she went cross to whole other state to be free from him . 
“ i guess i’ll see you tomorrow “ she called . 
“ yup and i’ll be gone by the afternoon  i’ll give you what you want after that “ he waved. How could he make it better , how uneasy his presence alone made her , how every time she looked at him it wasn’t of love it was of pain maybe this was what they both needed that closure of knowing it was truly done  that need to fight was fading as one  of giving her peace was stronger . 
“I’ll see you tomorrow darling just let us know when to be there” jake stood wondering what the sudden shift , the sudden change . 
“ will do “ she nodded opening the door as he walked out , he got to the lobby on for him to see rooster sitting head in his hands . 
“ i really fucked this up man i’m hurting her more being here “ he broke completely the realisation and the gravity of it all to much .  “ i love her more than i could love anyone else and i  fucked it up every bit of happiness is gone before i can fully enjoy it” he sniffled . 
“ your not fighting?” jake asked. 
“ i’m done fighting , fighting to keep her in my life when all i do is break her heart i love her too much to do that i love her too much to cause more pain … i love her to let her move on and find happiness” he sighed .
“ even if it’s with that douche doctor” jake asked. 
“ once he doesn’t hurt her i mean hell he probably treat her better than i ever did “ .
“ so we’re really going back tomorrow huh?” 
“ we have to let her get on with life maybe even get to have her as a friend  at  some point “ he nodded as he hope it would help  ,  even if it killed him to let her go well he would do it to make her never cry over him again .
next part
taglist : @djs8891 @shanimallina87 @peachmartini @paisleebubbles @kawaiiskeletondragonbanana @emosrkool
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jo-harrington · 2 years ago
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Corrective Action (Eddie Munson x Store Manager!Reader)
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Pairing: Eddie Munson x Reader
Summary: Reader and Eddie have been hanging out for a little while and a lot of people seem to think it’s ok to voice their opinion around her.
Previous Part: Interview Prep
Warnings/Themes: AU where the Upside Down doesn't terrorize Hawkins. Reader works at the Claire's at StarCourt. Eddie works at TapeWorld. Mutual pining and slow burn (yes still, always). Bullying, manipulative/helicopter parents, ACAB, all around shitty people that might trigger some things. Thick skinned reader who is sick of said shitty people. Sad boy Eddie. Hurt/Comfort. Pinky promises.
Note: I really hope this one is good guys, I feel like I wrote half of this in an airport wishing I was actually drinking (I did and I was, but I'm sober and kind of currently wishing I wasn't). If this is me fishing for compliments...I guess this is just yummy bait.
You can find my masterlist here for more featuring our resident Store Manager (in chronological order because I’m chaotic and I’m not gonna stop writing this way) and all of my other random Eddie Headcanons.
Please do not interact if you are not 18+.
Enjoy!
---
It started with Stacey at work.
You were sitting at the little desk in the stockroom, working out payroll and the next schedule, when she came to clock out.
“Hey, good job today on upselling diamonds,” you told her, incredibly proud. While she was great at customer service, she really had a hard time getting customers to add to their basket. You had worked on coaching her and she was quickly becoming your best sales associate. “I’m proud of you, you’ve been doing so great!”
“Yeah thanks! All of these rich PTA moms I swear to god,” she rolled her eyes. “I guess my mom was only a hard ass if I asked her to buy me things though. If anyone else tried to sell things to her, she always caved.”
She continued going on about her mom getting all the upgrades when she got a new car.
“…Mr. Harrington almost started singing when she finally signed the lease.” She laughed but then sobered up, glancing around the stockroom to see if anyone else was around. Stacey cleared her throat. “Hey I’ve been meaning to ask…”
“What’s up?”
“Are you, like…dating Eddie Munson?”
It would have been an innocent enough question if not for her tone. Or the way she grimaced and scrunched her nose, as if just saying his name put a bad taste in her mouth.
Eddie had been wary of your interactions with Stacey from the beginning, you recalled. And when you had asked him why later on, he beat around the bush a little before giving in.
She was someone who had been in his classes for as long as he could remember, she was not a cheerleader but certainly one of the popular girls, and when her jock boyfriend got a job at the local insurance office after missing his chances at getting an athletic scholarship, she stayed behind too and made all of the local gossip her business.
And for some reason, even if he swore he never remembered saying more than two words to her at any given time, she made rumors about him her specialty.
You’d been at a loss. On the one hand, you knew Eddie dealt with bullies and rumors even if he never outright admitted it to you. But on the other, you had no reason to distrust Stacey. All you knew about the people you worked with were just what they told you and what you were able to witness while working together. And you knew Stacey engaged in all sorts of gossip. But Eddie’s name had never exited her mouth.
Until now.
“What?” You were so shocked at the entire scenario that you didn’t even realize she would take that as an invitation for her to continue.
“Well he’s been hanging around the store and I’ve seen you guys sitting together sometimes. But like…well, haven’t you heard?” She got closer and sat in the chair next to you. “He, like, sacrifices virgins in the woods and has, I don’t know, summoned demons before. He’s a Satanist, a freak.”
You bristled at the name-calling and the accusations.
“Stace—“
”And you’re new so of course you don’t know—“
“Stacey I’m gonna stop you right there,” you held up your hand and she immediately shut up and sat up a little straighter. “First of all, it is incredibly inappropriate to ask me about my personal life. About any aspect of it, outside of what I willingly share with you. I am your boss, I’m not your friend, this isn’t high school. We are all entitled to privacy and I am incredibly uncomfortable discussing this with you.
“Second, again not that you need to know, but no. I am not dating Eddie. Eddie works here in StarCourt and you make friends with people when you work at a shopping mall. That being said, Eddie is not only an employee at StarCourt, but also a human being and a neighbor to all of us—”
“Ew no he isn’t. He lives in that—“ she started but you weren’t having any of it.
“And because of that he deserves some respect. Calling someone a freak and spreading rumors isn’t respectful. Which leads me to the last point.
“One of the values of this company is integrity. Doing the right thing, even if it’s hard to do. And I’m sorry but bullying, under any circumstance, is not the right thing to do. So even though you are off the clock, you are still on company property and you are certainly not operating with integrity. I’m incredibly disappointed that I have to have this kind of conversation with you, but I will consider this a warning for next time.
“If I hear talk like this coming from you again, there will be disciplinary action,” you concluded. “Do you understand?”
You hated to do it, you hated to put on the manager pants. You hated that Stacey’s eyes welled with tears the longer you talked and that she trembled as she finally nodded. But even if Eddie wasn’t your friend, you wouldn’t condone this kind of behavior. You held your team to an incredibly high standard and this wasn’t it.
You sent Stacey home and got back to the schedule with a sour taste in your mouth.
---
The next time, you were actually out with Eddie.
He had told you that the sunrise at the old quarry was second to none and when you confessed that you had never actually watched the sunset or the sunrise before, he immediately figured out the best day for you to go together.
He had put together a picnic with all sorts of breakfast foods, because apparently no one made pancakes, bacon, and eggs better than he did—
“Got an A+ in home ec, thank you very much. Didn’t help me get my GPA up but Wayne is pretty happy when I have breakfast waiting for him after a double shift.”
—and treats from the gas station since he insisted that you needed to experience all of the convenience food he loved. There was a thermos full of coffee and a boat load of blankets in the back of the van. He picked you up at your apartment, ringing the bell at ass o’clock in the morning looking way too energetic for someone who woke up so early.
“What do you mean? I never went to sleep!”
The radio was low as he drove you towards the outskirts of town; he’d also surprised you with a replacement of your old Boston cassette that you had nearly played to death, and he hummed along and tapped his fingers against the steering wheel along with Foreplay.
You reached a certain sign on the road signaling the quarry was up ahead, only for the tell tale lights and “whoop whoop” of a squad car to sound off from behind you. Eddie cursed and pulled off to the side of the road.
“Sweetheart can you grab me, uh” he motioned for the glove box. You’d already popped it open and dug through to find his registration as he pulled the wallet from his pocket. “Thanks.”
The crunch of gravel caused Eddie to look at this side mirror and groan a low, drawn out “fuck.”
“Munson,” the officer greeted roughly once the window was rolled down.
“Callahan,” Eddie replied. “Hopper got you on traffic patrol now huh?”
“Very funny,” Callahan deadpanned. “You know why I pulled you over.”
“Actually I don’t,” Eddie chuckled dryly. “License plates are up to date, I wasn’t speeding, and that tail light you busted last time you pulled me over is fixed.”
What the fuck?
"I don't like the tone you're taking with me, kid," Callahan spat. "Not a respectful bone in your body, any time I have to pull you over. It's for your safety after all. And the safety of the entire town."
How many times had this guy pulled Eddie over? 5? 10?
“Anyway, we just broke up a party over in Loch Nora about an hour ago, lot of kids high and wasted,” Callahan continued and there was no way you could have guessed the words that were coming out of his mouth next. “I know how you like to hang around parties like those, do a few deals. Maybe you decided to take advantage of some pretty girl who doesn’t know where she is.”
Callahan leaned down a little further and shined a flashlight into the van, directly at you.
“How you doing tonight miss? Can you tell me your name please?”
Your world was shaken to the core.
“Excuse me?” You scoffed, clenching your fists.
“You got your wits about you, or do I need to call an ambulance or something? Maybe your mom, if she needs to come pick you up?”
“I’m fine, officer, but I don’t like what you’re implying about my friend here.” You responded harshly. “Or about me. I am a grown woman, I am in this van of my own volition, with full mental capacities other than the fact that I’m maybe a little tired because I just woke up 20 minutes ago to go see the sunrise with my friend.”
Callahan stumbled over his words for a second, immediately backtracking as Eddie sat speechless in the driver's seat.
“We were never at a party in Loch Nora. Eddie didn’t kidnap me. Neither of us are drunk or high. So I’m pretty sure this is an unlawful traffic stop officer,” you concluded.
Both officer Callahan and Eddie looked at you with dumbstruck expressions.
“What, it’s true. So unless you have another reason to have pulled us over, officer?” You asked. “Can we be on our way now?”
He cleared his throat and handed the license and registration back to Eddie.
“Must have seen another van outside the party. An easy mistake to make,” he replied. “Got yourself a smart girlfriend there, Munson. Don’t fuck it up like you usually do ok?”
Callahan did another “whoop whoop” before pulling away and heading back to town, but Eddie continued to sit stiffly, refusing to move.
“You ok?” You asked, putting a hand on his arm.
“I can’t…he didn’t…” Eddie stumbled over his words. “I’m not like that ok? I don’t…I don’t take advantage of girls at parties. Fuck. Please don’t think—”
“I didn’t,” you assured him.
“Callahan always has it in for me, man,” He explained. “I don’t even know what I did. Caught me smoking weed on school grounds with the guys one summer way back and it was like a permanent target was placed on my back.”
“Small town cops with a big ego,” you explained, knowing fully well how douchebags like that were. “And you’re the resident bad boy.”
“You gotta stop calling me that,” he groaned in, what you believed to be, embarrassment.
---
And it kept happening.
Whispers when you went out for pizza, eyes watching you at the grocery store with pity or disgust, you didn’t know for sure. The one time you both stopped in Montgomery Ward on lunch to get a new dress (and for Eddie not to spend his lunch alone) and the saleswoman kept hovering as though you were about to steal.
Well, not you. Eddie.
No one usually dared to say anything to your face but you could still hear it. “She hangs around that Munson boy. Ugh such a troublemaker. Poor girl. Someone should tell her. He’s a trickster, that one.”
And no, you knew it wasn’t everyone. Just the busybodies who didn’t know what they were talking about.
You’d usually roll your eyes and continue on with your day. You could take whatever was thrown your way—some people just sucked and they couldn’t keep their mouths shut—but you knew how it affected Eddie. You could see it when you were with him, how deflated he became.
Your friend, one of the best people you knew, regardless of your stupid crush on him. He became distant, shrunk like he wanted to take up less space in the world.
You just about had enough of it.
And it all came to a head one day, a week after you hired Chrissy Cunningham as a part-time associate.
Her mother dropped her off after Cheer camp one day and wanted to see the new store.
You had a pretty solid parent policy that you made known to your teenage associates, just as your old store manager did when she first hired you at 16. Parents could come in and visit, shop, sure. But they weren’t going to interfere with the business. No calling to complain if the schedules conflicted with family nights. No calling in sick on their kids behalf.
“If you’re old enough to take on the responsibility of a job, you’re taking all of the responsibilities, ok? Even the not so nice ones.”
Chrissy, just like the others, understood.
Chrissy’s mom, on the other hand, had a bit of a problem with that.
You were nice enough when they first got in, getting to hear how the whole family was so excited about her first job, how it would look great on college applications come Fall. Chrissy, of course, had told you all of this in her interview; she was a sweet kid who clearly was trying to take on a lot and once you met her mom, you understood where the pressure was coming from.
Your mom was like that too, in her own way. Picking and picking and picking.
“Oh actually,” Mrs Cunningham started and from her tone you knew it was just going to be the beginning of a whole to-do. “I was meaning to ask if Chrissy could change her schedule? I saw you had put her on Saturday afternoons. But there’s a junior cheer team at the park district that she helps coach and they have meets on the first Saturday of the month.”
The too-big, overly-whitened smile was an unspoken threat of “you’re going to give me what I want or else.”
You explained that weekends were a mandatory availability for your associates who were still in school, but it didn’t mean they would always be scheduled. You had already told Chrissy that you would give her the days of her meets off, if she let you know the dates at least 2 weeks in advance. It was only once a month, after all.
That smile fell, like it always did, when someone like Mrs. Cunningham, like your mother, like all the other Stepford-wife types in town, didn’t get their way.
She tried once again to explain, this was important to Chrissy and she could trade Saturdays for another day. Maybe Thursday afternoon? Only if she didn’t have too much homework, of course.
But there was no way to know that when you were writing the schedule two weeks out, you argued.
"Then I guess you'll just have to find a replacement for her shifts if she can't come in," Mrs. Cunningham argued.
“Ma’am, I leave the responsibility of schedule and availability to my associates when I hire them,” you explain. “Not their parents. You said you were excited for Chrissy to have a job. It’s only been a week. If she thinks she can handle Saturdays—or even if she doesn’t—I’ll leave it up to her. School hasn't even started yet; let's just give it some time before we try to make changes ok?”
And as one does when they feel attacked, she went after low hanging fruit.
“I wouldn’t expect you,” she sneered, “to know a whole lot about responsibility…or planning ahead for the future. You work in this little shop; it's not even a real job. I’ll bet you didn’t even go to college.
“And Chrissy said you’re friends with the Munson boy right? That he shows up sometimes to talk to you. He’s never known a day of responsibility in his life. He’s…he’s a drug dealer, a troublemaker—”
“Alright that’s it,” you interjected. “This is a place of business—my place of business—and we’re getting busy, so I will have to ask you to leave Mrs. Cunningham. Unless you want to stay for a piercing, I do have paying customers to tend to. I will discuss the schedule again with Chrissy. I promise.
“But for now, thanks for stopping by, it was so nice to meet you.”
---
“God she was such a bitch,” you complained as you watched Eddie throw cardboard boxes into the bailer.
This was typical for lunches spent together. You would both run trash down to the loading dock and complain about work while Eddie smoked—allowing you to luxuriate in his secondhand smoke for a little while—and then you would head to the food court to eat and just…spend time together.
Listen to music, talk about movies or books or whatever else came to mind.
This friendship was still new, there was plenty to talk about.
You kind of hoped there would always be something new to talk about. And that you two would be talking and having lunch together for a long time.
Best not get your hopes up though.
Currently, you were recounting the interaction with Mrs. Cunningham, purposefully leaving out the way she brought him into conversation.
What he didn't know wouldn't hurt him. Right?
“Poor Chrissy,” you sighed.
“Poor Chrissy?” Eddie scoffed. “Yeah, really sucks to be on top.”
“You know, she might be on top at school—”
“And her family might be rich, and she might live in a big house, and she might only need to work so it looks good on college applications. See where I’m going with this?”
“—but it sucks to have a parent constantly shitting on you. Even if they do it for ‘your benefit...'.”
“Why can’t you do anything right?”
“I stayed at home with you kids and this is the thanks I get?”
“I can’t make you respect this family. But don’t you have any self-respect?”
Maybe you were just projecting...
“Speaking of Queen Bee, here she comes now with her lover boy,” Eddie said, batting his eyelashes dramatically, and then he made a gagging noise. You were exiting the service corridors and spotted Chrissy, who had clocked out for the day, walking towards the food court with a very clean, athletic-looking blond boy.
“Now if you wanna talk about a bitch, look no further than Jason Carver.”
He proceeded to tell you all about how Jason and Jeff were neighbors, how they used to be friends as kids. How they stopped talking once Jason started up with sports, and he started picking on Jeff once he made varsity.
“He had some macho, roided up growth spurt last year, and that paired with the self-righteous bible thumping meant that Hellfire was an easy target. Those meathead jocks picked on us before, sure, but…I dunno, Jason is a whole other level of cruel. 
“And he doesn’t hesitate to beat up the younger kids, but if I’m around…well needless to say they’re a little scared of me, they don’t want to take a chance that I’ll put a curse on them or something.
“I’ll do whatever I need to, I’ll be their villain, if it means keeping those kids safe.” He rubbed the sleeve of his flannel against his nose and sniffled lightly. “But it’s not like there’s anything I can do aside from that. I have to just sit there and take it, let my friends take it, because if I don’t…if I don’t, then I become everything they say I am. Angry, dangerous, a menace, a criminal.”
“Eddie that’s terrible,” you grumbled, Chrissy’s mom and your own troubles forgotten. "You don't deserve to be picked on like that."
Eddie hummed in contemplation for a moment.
“Ok enough of them, do you want to share chili cheese fries?” He diverted. You hesitated, not wanting to drop the subject entirely, but also not wanting to push him. Eddie flashed you those big, pleading eyes, though, and you caved.
Asshole knew exactly what he was doing.
“Sure,” you smiled.
“And you’ll let me buy today,” he continued, holding his hand out before you could argue. “Because you feel bad for me you’re gonna let me do it.”
“What logic is that?!” You exclaimed. He giggled maniacally and motioned for you to find a table before he practically skipped to the line to order.
He was lucky that he was cute.
---
Chrissy approached you the next time she had a shift together; you were planning to pull her aside at the end of her shift to double check that she was sure about her availability and to go over the parent policy once again. It was kind of a relief that she took the initiative instead.
“I’m sorry about my mom,” she began timidly. “She shouldn't have come in here just to interfere. It's just that I do have a lot going on, and when I told her I wanted to work at the mall too...well, she just..."
"Chrissy, I understand," you interjected. "Really I do, you don't need to explain. I knew when I hired you that you had a lot on your plate."
"Thank you again, by the way."
"I just want to make sure that you're sure this is the right move. Do we need to look at your availability again?" you asked. "If your mom comes back to have this conversation again, I'm not going to stand for it. I need employees who are responsible for their own time."
"No I know..." she sighed. "I'll talk with her. I really do like working here."
"I like having you work here," you reassured her. "You're doing a really great job so far."
"R-really?" she smiled, eyes getting a little glossy. "Thank you. I'm trying. My mom...never seems to be happy with anything I do. If it's not what I do, it's how long it takes, and if it's not that, then it's how I look, and--" She was starting to breathe a little heavily and you sighed.
"Hey listen, I get it," you said gently. "Mom's...well, sometimes they can be the worst. They know exactly what buttons to push. And I don't want to sound insensitive because I want you to know you can talk to me any time, I'm here for you. But we are on the sales floor.
"I know your shift is almost over, if you want to take a few to go in back and settle down before you leave, you can," you encouraged her. It wasn't a busy day; you could afford to give her a few extra minutes to herself.
"You're sure?"
"Yeah, Mindy will be back from lunch in a few and I can come and grab you if I need you."
Chrissy gave you a watery smile and then headed back into the stockroom.
There were a few minutes of restocking bracelets before the shop bell rang as a new customer walked in.
"Hey! Welcome in!" You greeted brightly, mindlessly, before looking up to find Chrissy's boyfriend standing there. He smiled and nodded in greeting.
"Hey, I'm here to pick Chrissy up," he explained.
"You're a little early," you laughed, trying to be cordial despite Eddie's words about him echoing in your mind. "She's just in back finishing up. I'll let her know you're here."
"Nah, that's ok," Jason shrugged. "I wanted to talk to you really quick."
You frowned at him and narrowed your eyes.
"Boyfriends unfortunately don't qualify for the employee discount," you stated lightly, hoping that this was the only thing he had to ask. "So if you have a little sister or something--"
"No, it's about Eddie Munson," he continued. "You really need to stay away from him."
Yeah. That was exactly what you were afraid he would say.
Ugh, you were really getting tired of this.
And it wasn't just that you were sick of people meddling, it was this boy in particular who was really rubbing you the wrong way. Gossipy sales associates with jock boyfriends, useless troublesome cops, nosy housewives, and well-meaning grandmas were one thing.
But a high school boy who was still wearing a letterman jacket in July, with a too nice smile and the audacity to have a savior complex when he was the one tormenting other kids?
That was where you drew the line.
You just wondered if you were willing to lose your job because of him.
“I'm telling you this for your own good. The crowd he’s a part of…,” Jason leaned closer as though it was a secret. “They’re a bunch of wastoids, listening to that devil's music, trying to lure virgins into the woods to sacrifice. And if you want to sit with the right crowd at lunch when school starts--”
You barked a laugh at this, right in his face, and he backed away looking confused.
Ok, so this wasn't "lose your job" worthy.
You mentally pulled on both your Disappointed Older Sibling and Angry Store Manager pants to gear up for this fight.
"Ok kid, real talk," you started, clapping your hands like a coach would. "I'm not in the business of yelling at teenage boys. And as flattering as it is that you might think I'm still in high school, there is no way a teenager would be managing a store. So there's point number one. Number two, don't assume a lady's age ok? At all. In either direction. That's a life lesson I'm gonna give you for free.
"Number three, and not that this conversation isn't...just really lovely, I need to get a point across and I'm sincerely doubtful you're gonna listen to me anyway. I just need you to understand that...like, whoever is hanging out with who, or going where, or doing what, is generally none of your business. Especially your girlfriend's boss. It's really disappointing that a nice boy like you is gonna cause his girlfriend to lose her job because he can't mind his own business."
And that was the punctuation at the end of the sentence to make him look nervous and a little sweaty.
You felt a little bad saying it, because no, you weren't going to fire Chrissy because of this dumb boy. But hopefully this would be a lesson learned.
"E-e-eddie was hanging around Chrissy the other day," he stuttered, looking extremely out of his element. Never been the person who had to face consequences before; you knew the type. "I saw him in here when I came to pick her up. She said...you were his friend and he was just waiting for you."
"I'm sure he was waiting for me."
"He always had crushes on the cheerleaders," he explained. "He was sniffing around this girl Julie a few years ago and she found out he was into this satanic stuff...I figured either you or Chrissy were next..."
"Oh buddy," you sighed. "And you figured if you came in here and told me not to hang around him, I would be spared...and Chrissy would be too?"
"See? You get it."
"Except that's really not how things work in real life or at a shopping mall, kid," you said. "Everyone is allowed to go wherever they want and talk to whoever they want. And I, as one of the managers in this building, am able to assess what is a danger to myself and my employees and Eddie certainly isn't one of them. Except for his corny jokes, he is harmless.
"You on the other hand," you continued, savoring the moment Jason's eyes got a little wider. "Approached me with a very distinct and threatening energy. So unless you want me to call mall security and make sure you are no longer allowed on the premises, I will need you to...re-evaluate your tone of voice and your intention of visiting.
"So, what was your name again?"
"J-Jason Carver, ma'am."
Ew. Ma'am. Ok you weren't that old. But you could deal with it.
"Jason Carver," your tone changed immediately, back to the sickening Store Manager voice you defaulted to on a regular basis. Eddie had called it unsettling before, to hear you go from your regular tone of voice to that. Jason's eye twitched and you grinned maniacally. "It's so nice to meet you. Chrissy was telling everyone it's your anniversary coming up?"
His eyes shifted slightly, and he laughed nervously.
"Ye-yes ma'am," he agreed.
"And what are you planning to get her as a gift?" you asked. He froze again. Ok, no gift; Chrissy definitely deserved better than that. "I think a necklace would be really lovely. Not from here, I can see you looking at the jewelry wall. But there's a really nice jewelry store downstairs that has birthstone pendants and stuff. I think she would really love something from there."
"I-I think that's a great idea," he nodded vigorously.
The door to the stockroom opened and Chrissy walked out with her bag in hand, ready for you to check it.
"Ok, I'm all set to go then, thank you so much for--Jason!" Chrissy smiled when she saw her boyfriend. "I thought you were going to wait for me downstairs."
He cleared his throat and composed himself.
"Figured I would come up and surprise you," he grinned smoothly. "Met your boss, she's...really cool, just like you said."
Nice save.
Ok maybe he wasn't as stupid as you originally thought.
Chrissy waved goodbye as they left, and Jason had the right sense to keep his mouth shut.
---
You waited outside Tape World as the mall started to slow down and get dark. There was a little coin-operated horse right outside of the store and you leaned against it and wondered, if it was a real horse, how fast it could take you and Eddie out of this shit hole of a town, away from all of the people who said horrible things.
You had nothing to complain about though. Eddie had to deal with it for years. He did so much to protect his friends...all you wanted to do was to protect him too.
The gate opened up and Eddie ducked underneath, grinning at you once it was locked and he was upright once again. He muttered a quick goodbye to the associate who closed with him before he approached you.
"Hey, it's only Thursday," he laughed. "Did I forget we had plans? I thought you opened."
"No, I was a mid," you shrugged. "But I stayed because..."
Should you tell him? You didn't want to upset him, or have him pull away from you, like he always did whenever talk of his reputation around town was mentioned. You wanted your silly, carefree, wonderful best friend not to have to suffer because of narrow minded people anymore.
"Beeeccaauuuuseee." He hums for a moment. "Because you knew that I was planning a Little Debbie taste test for Sunday and that all of the snacks were in the van right now?"
"What?" you laughed. "Oh my God."
"You said you were more of a Hostess person. I am trying to change your allegiance to the Dark Side of the Force." He stood taller, theatrically trying to mimic Darth Vader. "What better way than with a joint or two and a shit ton of snack cakes at the lake."
"Eddie!"
"What? Don't tell me you have never smoked before," he said in mock offense. "What rock have you been living under? I'm going to have to call your parents, young lady. They did too good a job raising you."
You stared at him for a minute as he laughed and you couldn't help yourself; you quickly closed the distance between the two of you and wrapped your arms around his waist. He went stiff for a second before placing one of his arms around your shoulders and his other hand on the back of your head.
"What's wrong?" he asked quietly. "I mean, I know I did good with the Little Debbie, but you don't have to smoke if you don't want to. I was just kidding."
"No, it's not..." you sighed.
Hugging Eddie was nothing like hugging a girl friend--all squeezes and giggles over something silly and stupid--or hugging a relative--stiff and a little cold, your family not really ones for outward affection to begin with. He was just the right hug shape, his arms at the right height, the right length to wrap around you. His cheek at the right height to rest on the top of your head if he really wanted to (which you really hoped he did). His stupid waist that was perfect for you to wrap your arms around and soft enough that you could squeeze a little bit and he would actually give instead of just stiff and there.
An Eddie Hug was a perfect hug.
And hopefully your hug was perfect for him too, so that it wouldn't hurt him or scare him away as you told him...
"You remember last week?" you began. "You said Jason Carver is the biggest bitch I'd ever meet?"
"Y-yeah," he replied hesitantly, getting a little stiff in your arms, but he did nothing to pull away from you.
"Well, I met him and he is," you continued.
"What did he do?" Eddie asked, irritation evident in his voice. "If...if he did something, said something to you, I swear to God I--"
"I handled it," you cut him off. "He tried to scare me away from you. He said...well, it doesn't matter does it?"
"I'm sure it's what everyone says about me."
"And I told him he could get fucked," you said.
"What?!" Eddie finally pushed you away from him, hands gripping your arms tightly, as he laughed. "No you didn't."
"No I didn't," you shook your head. "But I might as well have. I think I scared him."
"Did you do the creepy voice?" he asked.
"Yeah," you giggled.
"I fucking hate that," he shivered.
"One day, Eddie Munson, you will answer the phone with a 'y'ello' and you will forever be turned to the Dark Side too," you mimicked his Darth Vader impression. "Just you wait and see."
"Never, I would sooner die!" He threw an arm across his eyes dramatically and turned away from you. After a moment had passed, he stood up straight again, hands fidgeting at his sides. "So, uh, are we cool?"
"Why wouldn't we be?"
"Because everyone tells you to stay away from me," he shrugged. "That I'm no good. That I'm a freak. I've been hearing it all my life. But I don't think I could stand it if I heard it from you too."
"Eddie," you started, worrying at your lip for a second. "I know how soul crushing it is to constantly have to hear how bad you are, how you're never gonna live up to whatever expectations others have of you. But listen to me, and listen good: you are absolutely wonderful.
"A wonderful neighbor, a wonderful coworker, a wonderful friend. Who cares what other people think about you; who cares, even...what I think about you?"
"I care," he shrugged.
"But it doesn't matter how many people tell me that you're bad, I'm never gonna think that about you ok? You're so many things but you're also just...good. Ok?"
"Ok," he nodded, eyes getting progressively more watery by the second.
"And don't you start with the self-deprecating shit around me anymore either," you weakly swatted at his shoulder and his torso, and he laughed. "I can't take it. Only one of us can be a miserable piece of shit, and I'm older, so I have dibs."
"You're not a miserable piece of shit," he chuckled. "You're wonderful too."
"No more of this...sad sackery then? From either of us?" you asked and held out a pinky to him. "You can't break a pinky swear."
Eddie wrapped his pinky around yours tightly.
"No more. Upon punishment of death."
---
Next Part: Standard Operating Procedures 1.04
Tag List (can I call you guys the Sales Associates? OMG, that's what it's gonna be): @gaysludge @storiesbyrhi @tayhar811 @spookybabey @word-wytchh @maidenofartemis @dreamlandcreations @wickedbelle
Let me know if you want to be added to the tag list! I'm sure I missed some tag requests, but I have been out of town with shoddy internet access so blame that, not me.
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