#but really proud with what I could do ♥

[carnal-lnstinct]

Fic Author Self Rec

I know me and the moots have been delivering some beautiful writing since this first went around so we're bringing it back before the end of the year! Post 5 of your favorite fics you've written and share a little about it ♥♥♥

Tagging: @yeowangies @actuallysaiyan @dreadsuitsamus @beneathstarryskies @emmacornell @missnebulaa @vegeta-bananabluish + anyone else who writes and sees this please share and talk about your favorite things you have written

My five favorites from my own fics(of this year):

— Gogeta Soulmates Valentine

Plot-wise, this was definitely in the top three of my favorite vday requests and I really enjoyed writing the soulmate concept. Gogeta is still one of those characters that doesn't come as easy to me to write but when I get it, I get it! And he's always softer than what I intend for which I love.

— Bedtime Story

**JJK SPOILERS** I honestly ain't been the same since Toji's second death and what it reveals about him. First death? Well okay you died doing what you loved sweetie time to rest. Second death? Please sedate me I have not known a singular day of peace! 😭😭 But I needed a Toji fic that wasn't him just blowing out backs. So I just wrote him being a dad and husband, happy, existing in the same space at the same time as his wife and child while she tells a bedtime story to Megumi that becomes about them AND THEY ALL LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER. Wishing everybody but the Zenin clan and Mahito a very peaceful rest of the year.

— All My Soul Within Me, Burning.

Wrote this mostly for the Halloween season and Fn-f movie, also I weirdly had just noticed at the time majority of Gero's androids have the same blue eyes and wanted to do something with that. This is probably one of maybe two fics I wrote this year without any pairings or romance. With this AU, I toyed around with the idea of an angry spirit (a la fn-f lore style) being trapped inside his own body from his violent death, only now his body is this "bio-android prototype" shell and he represents Android 16 instead of canon 16. After Bulma fixes him, the spirit starts to regain some of his memory and fights against Gero's android programming. I wanted to continue this but of course SOTS took priority and now I think it's fine as a standalone one-shot for its little twist ♥

— Royal Pains

Praise to the only threesome I wrote this year! Virgin!Vegeta plot has to be the highlight of the year though, I love how involved everyone was with this concept and the many fics that were born from it. ♥♥♥♥ Consider this one a fave more for what the prompt inspired from a few of my favorite fic writers than what I wrote, but I'm always proud anytime I get to write a flustered Vegeta. It's the only way I know how to write him.

— Back At The Garden

Obviously ss4 Goku is in my faves. He is my king 😭♥ This one is just a plot bunny that got stuck in my head until I wrote it down. One thing about my TWYSILY fics, they're probably gonna get sequels nobody asked for and this is always a safe space for SS4. ♥

[kajibunny]

.⋆｡🍓࿔˚what their kisses taste like...⊹ ࣪˖🍰˚⊹♡ w/ wind breaker boys

✿ featuring: ren kaji, haruka sakura, hajime umemiya, hayato suo, jo togame, mitsuki kiryu ✿ contains: fluffy fluff fluff, looots of kissing, descriptions of the way they taste ✿ a/n: i honestly think they would all taste really good (•ᴗ<˶)✧₊ ⊹ that's it, that's the post i guess! happy reading, cuties! ♥︎ ✿ wc: 1.5k

ʚɞ kaji - 

kaji asked you to hold his lollipop for him, entrusting you with his half-eaten candy in your hands while he went to buy a drink from the vending machine.

you pop the sweet sucker into your mouth, an unconscious habit. ever since you two got together you've always shared everything with kaji, so sharing his lollipop should be no exception, right? 

"that's mine." his eyes are now fixated on your mouth, where his lollipop stick hangs out of, and he can't help but think about how it's just been in his mouth about ten seconds ago, and he wondered if you could taste him on it too. 

"i'll buy you some more tomorrow." you told him, with no intention of giving back his lollipop at all.

"it's okay. i don't mind sharing with you." kaji takes out the lollipop from your mouth and gives you a taste of his own lips instead, pressing it against yours fervently. 

oh, so that's what he meant by sharing. 

notes of peach faintly made its way onto your lips, and transferring over to his as well. "this is mine, too." he declares, once again staking his claim on your mouth, which tasted just as sweet as the lollipop he just had, maybe even sweeter. 

kissing you left such a nice taste, fueling kaji's desire for more, so much so that it made him contemplate about the thought of replacing his lollipops with your lips instead.

ʚɞ sakura - 

sakura is still so, so blushy around you, even though you two have spent multiple nights together, his face still flushes scarlet whenever you did your nightly self-care routine, your shoulder touching his while he was brushing his teeth over the sink. he finished up and rinsed off, while you waited for him with a huge, proud smile on your face.

"good job, baby!" you peck his lips, obsessed with the way he adorably heats up every time you praise him, this time it was for not forgetting to brush before bedtime.

"wh-what are you doing!?" he jumps up after he felt your lips on his, which tasted of spearmint from the toothpaste he had just used. 

"giving you your goodnight kiss!" you replied, with a matter-of-factly tone.

the next night, sakura brushed his teeth again in your shared bathroom while you hovered over the sink, your cleanser in hand. after rinsing his mouth, he just stood there expectantly, as if waiting for you to do something. 

he stared at you with a blush sprawled across his face. "y-you're forgetting something!" he blurted out. you shot him a puzzled look. "am i?" 

sakura's eyes darted down to your lips, giving you a hint of just what he needed from you. "oh, your goodnight kiss? if you liked it so much, you should have said so!" you giggled, smooching sakura's lips like there's no tomorrow. 

ʚɞ suo - 

to say that suo is playful would be an understatement. underneath that sweet, smiling face, lies beneath a naughty guy who has an obsession with the way you taste.

"you have a little teacake at the corner of your mouth." suo, feigning concern, points to the space beside your lips.

"where?" you ask as you try to search for it with your fingertips, to no avail. your eyes brought itself back to suo's scarlet ones, now inches away from your face. 

his lips captures yours in an unexpected kiss, and suo's tongue darts out to lick off the little crumb of teacake at the corner of your mouth. "there, all gone!" he hums happily, a grin on his face, drinking his tea as if his mouth was not latched on to yours just two seconds ago.

now you know why you barely ever get to see suo eat, it's because he'll only eat if it tastes like you. 

ʚɞ umemiya -

you were supposed to wake umemiya up from his nap on the hammock five minutes ago, but how could you? 

his eyes were fluttered shut, hair down and relaxed, umemiya's chest heaving softly, looking like he was so at peace. you hoped he had been dreaming about you, which he probably was, judging from the way a content smile made its way across his lips. 

you just couldn't help yourself as you angled down and gave him a quick little kiss. you giggled to yourself as you caught the aroma of fresh herbs from kissing him, he was probably picking and sampling them and decided to take a little nap afterwards.

umemiya's eyes slowly opened to the sight of you, him immediately wrapping his arms around you and pulling you into the hammock with him. "i didn't even feel that, can you give me one more? pleeeease?" he pleaded, nuzzling his head on your shoulder. 

you complied, giving him another kiss, and he went to deepen it by pulling you even closer. "can you wake me up like this all the time?" umemiya could definitely see himself quickly becoming addicted to your kisses. 

you sighed and giggled, tightly embracing him. how could you ever say no to this man?

ʚɞ togame -

togame was definitely tall, no doubt about it. of course it has its perks and advantages too, like he can reach things for you really easily, he gave the greatest piggyback rides, he was your human furnace during cold nights, and the likes. 

but one thing his height got in the way of was kissing. particularly whenever you wanted to kiss him.

you tugged on togame's robe in a futile attempt to pull him down closer to you. a "hmm?" escaping togame's lips, as a little smile made its way across. he continued drinking his ramune while his eyes made its way to your form. 

"you're too tall, jo." you sighed. even on your tiptoes, you failed to bring his face down to your level so you could kiss him. 

"that so?" he let out a slight chuckle. togame eventually lends you a little help as he leans down until his face was directly in front of yours.

"you could've kissed me if you tried just a little harder, angel." he caresses your cheek, lightly teasing you, his lips capturing yours in a long, slow and passionate kiss. 

"i wanted to kiss you properly." a pout present on your lips. togame loved your cute little pout, it made him want to kiss you more and more. 

"don't worry, we can do it again and again until you are satisfied." 

jo togame was insatiable for you, loving the way you taste, always hungry for more. 

ʚɞ kiryu - 

you have been crushing on kiryu for quite a while now, him being 'totally your type', as you talked about him on and on to your friends, them eagerly listening to you gushing about kiryu's pretty pink hair, soft gentle eyes, beautiful piercings, cat-like smile and not to mention his silly hotdog phone case. 

your friends told you to just go for it, be bold and just ask him if he was dating someone already so that you could cease daydreaming about him occupying your thoughts all day and night, preventing you from getting a proper good night's sleep. 

"kiryu, is there a girl you like?" you nervously ask him.

"there is, actually." he replies. "would you like to see her? i can show you." 

oh. so he had someone he liked already.

the way he smiled as he gave you a direct answer made you want to bury yourself in the ground and never come out.

"y-yeah, sure! i want to see. is she pretty?" you tried to hide the discouraged tone in your voice, thinking about how kiryu's thoughts are probably filled to the brim with his crush, like what you had with him. 

"she is! super pretty! this is her." he picks up his phone and flashes the screen in front of you. half of you did not want to see the object of kiryu's desires, but you were curious and the urge to peek won over you. 

on his phone was a picture of none other than you.

it was a zoomed in photo of you, smiling and laughing while you talked with your friends, and it seemed to be taken after you had just waved "hi" to kiryu. it took a while for you to comprehend that what he meant was that the girl he liked all this time was actually you. 

"she likes you too, kiryu." your cheeks were tinged as pink as his hair, and as pink as kiryu's kissable lips. 

speaking of kiryu's kissable lips, they were making their way onto yours now, brushing against yours, as you felt the cold metal of his labret piercing touch the bottom of your lip. his lips were so soft and warm in contrast to his piercing.

"i've wanted to do that for a long time now." the corners of his mouth turning upwards in a sweet smile. little did kiryu know, you wanted his strawberry chapstick flavored kisses just as much, and maybe even longer.

© kajibunny 2024 / all rights reserved

[harrysfolklore]

plsss can you make a fake instagram where the reader is a lawyer

you know how to ball, i know aristotle - op81

i really liked how this one turned out ! we love sino oscar 🥰 make sure to leave your feedback

MASTERLIST | MY PATREON

liked by oscarpiastri, logansargeant and 18,637 others

yourinstagram greetings from the library 🧐 keeping an eye on my angel boy who started kindergarten (aka formula one) last month

tagged: oscarpiastri

view all 498 comments

username1 serving cunt in the library we love to see it ♥︎ by author

username2 fellow columbia student right here 🙋‍♀️

↳ yourinstagram omgg we should hang out soon

username3 since when are you into f1 bestie

↳ yourinstagram since i’m dating one of the drivers 🤔

oscarfan1 THIS IS OSCAR’S GF??? SHES GORGEOUS ♥︎ by author, oscarpiastri

username4 i’ve been following for ages now but i just found out that she’s dating a famous athlete 😭

oscarfan2 i was ‪hoping that oscar was single but now that i found out that he has a beautiful AND smart gf i want them to adopt me

logansargeant I’ve been taking care of him in the playground, don’t worry

↳ yourinstagram i wouldn’t expect any less from you

↳ landonorris We haven’t met yet but I’m also taking care of little Oscah ♥︎ by author

↳ landofan1 OFC HE HAD TO COMMENT

↳ yourinstagram well thank you, little lando norris

mclaren When will we see you in papaya gear at a race? 🧡 Ps. The last picture is so real

↳ yourinstagram omg when college stops kicking my ass

↳ oscarfan1 i love her already

oscarpiastri I miss you so much, but I’m so happy to see you in your dream school, smart girl🤍 ♥︎ by author

↳ oscarfan2 IM SOBBING THIS IS SO SWEET

↳ yourinstagram i love you 🥺

liked by yourinstagram, landonorris and 457,296 others

oscarpiastri The smile on my face could only mean one thing: It’s home race weekend 🇦🇺

view all 12,027 comments

oscarfan1 BABYYYYY

oscarfan2 he looks so kissable

mclaren Australia’s National Treasure 🧡

oscarfan3 MANIFESTING A PODIUM SO HARD

logansargeant Good luck on your home race bro 🙌 ♥︎ by author

↳ oscarfan1 bestiesss

username1 i’m still waiting for his girlfriend’s paddock debuttt

alex_albon The superior papaya boy ♥︎ by author

↳ landofan1 LANDO WAS FOUND CRYING

↳ oscarfan1 i love them

landonorris I’m going to categorically ignore what alex albon just said

↳ landofan1 HES SOOOO😭

landonorris Don’t to fool your audience, your smile is because your girl is finally coming ♥︎ by author, yourinstagram

↳ landofan2 OMFGGGGGGGGG

↳ oscarfan2 OSCAR AND YN PADDOCK DEBUT CONFIRMED BY LANDOOOO

↳ oscarfan3 goddd i was praying for this

↳ yourinstagram but can you blame him? ♥︎ by author

↳ username2 I LOVE THIS RELATIONSHIP SM

yourinstagram i can’t wait to see you, squish 🥺 ♥︎ by author

↳ oscarfan1 SQUISH I COULD SOBBBB

↳ oscarfan2 they’re so adorable i can’t do this

↳ oscarpiastri ❤️❤️❤️

yourinstagram added to their stories

liked by alexandrasaintmleux, oscarpiastri and 47,836 others

yourinstagram took a break from law school to finally go to my first race 🕺 SO PROUD OF YOU @oscarpiastri

view all 611 comments

username1 AWEEE your wag era finally

oscarfan1 QUEEN OF THE PADDOCK ♥︎ by author

carmenmmundt It was so lovely to meet you ✨ ♥︎ by author

↳ yourinstagram likewise beautiful carm 💓

↳ username2 i just want to be one of them

oscarfan2 thank you yn for giving us a weekend of blushy and smiley oscar and the best boyfriend content ever

oscarfan3 COME TO EVERY RACE PLEASEEE

↳ yourinstagram i would love to but i have to get my degree 🥲

mclaren You’re officially a papaya girl now 🧡

username2 they make the best couple ever bc she’s all brains and he’s all muscle ♥︎ by author

landonorris Go get that degree now, I need someone who can get me out of jail for free

↳ landofan1 WHY IS HE LIKE THIS 😭😭

↳ yourinstagram 🫡🫡🫡

username3 she’s stronger than me because is oscar piastri was my bf and i had the chance to travel around the world with him and look pretty u would drop out of college already

↳ yourinstagram just a few months till graduation i can do it okay

↳ oscarfan2 I LOVE HER

oscarpiastri Having you here made this weekend the best ever. I love you ❤️ ♥︎ by author

↳ oscarfan1 BOYFRIEND OSCAR I CANT

↳ username1 why can’t my boyfriend simp for me like this

↳ yourinstagram i loveeee youuuu

liked by charles_leclerc, yourinstagram and 654,386 others

oscarpiastri The perfect home race weekend 🇦🇺 I miss you already @yourinstagram 🤍

view all 15,099 comments

oscarfan1 AWEEEEE

oscarfan2 MY HEART

georgerussell63 I need more of those grandma Piastri cookies ♥︎ by author

↳ danielricciardo Same

↳ username1 LET ME INNNN 😭

mclaren We love Australia 🦘🌏

oscarfan3 yn and oscar shouldn't be separated that's like a crime ♥︎ by yourinstagram

oscarfan4 THE THRID PIC MY HEARTTTT

landonorris Your girlfriend is cooler than you btw ♥︎ by yourinstagram

↳ landofan1 and teammate of the year award goes to lando norris

↳ logansargeant I agree

↳ username2 imagine the entire grid loving you

↳ oscarpiastri You're supposed to be my friend

↳ landonorris And she’s going to be my personal lawyer soon so

↳ yourinstagram 😭😭😭

yourinstagram i love you so much, angel. thank you for this weekend 🥺 ♥︎ by author

↳ username2 their relationship is the purest thing ever

liked by yourinstagram, georgerussell63 and 764,389 others

oscarpiastri Little mid season recharge. Visiting my favorite future lawyer 🤎

tagged: yourinstagram

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oscarfan1 AWEEEEEE

oscarfan2 we love softie oscarrrr

username1 oh to be a columbia student

landonorris My kids ❤️❤️

↳ landofan1 lando is the biggest shooter for this relationship

↳ yourinstagram you’re just two years older than me..

↳ landonorris And? You’re my kids

↳ oscarfan2 I LOVE THEMMMM

username2 yn’s curls are so prettyyyy omg ♥︎ by author

nicolepiastri Our smart girl ! 👩‍⚖️ ♥︎ by author, yourinstagram

↳ oscarfan1 aweee mama piastri

↳ yourinstagram love you 🥺

username3 imagine chilling in the library procrastinating some homework and you turn around and oscar piastri is there

yourinstagram i love you so much squish 🫶 ♥︎ by author

↳ oscarfan1 why are her pet names for him so damn adorable

liked by oscarpiastri, alexandrasaintmleux and 49,635 others

yourinstagram i can’t believe it’s my last week here and i’m going to be a real lawyer soon 😳

view all 633 comments

username1 GRADUATION IS SOOOON OMG

username2 i’ve been following you since you graduated high school and posted tips about college applications and now you’re about to finish college omg ♥︎ by author

oscarfan1 OMG OSCAR MUST GO TO HER GRADUATION

lilymhe congratulations smart girl 🤍🤍 ♥︎ by author

↳ yourinstagram thank you lovely 🫶

oscarfan2 THE LAST PICTURE IM YELLING

username3 she has the coolest life ever

mclaren Everyone in the papaya department is super proud 🧡

↳ yourinstagram ilysm mclaren admin

logansargeant How come you’re still dating my friend, who barely finished high school 😂 congrats!

↳ yourinstagram he’s cuuuuute 🥺

↳ oscarfan1 oscar’s friends are always dragging him help

↳ landonorris And can’t win a GP

↳ oscarpiastri You surely got confident after Miami, Lando Onewin ♥︎ by author, georgerussell63, alex_albon

↳ landofan1 STOOOOOP😭

oscarpiastri I’m always proud and in awe of you, but specially now 🤍 ♥︎ by author

↳ oscarfan1 I LOVE SIMP OSCAR

liked by oscarfan1, oscarfan2 and 2,936 others

f1updates “My girlfriend graduating from Columbia Law School next week so as soon as the job is done here I’m heading to New York. I’m really proud of here and I wouldn’t miss this moment for anything else.” - Oscar Piastri for SKY Sports

view all 288 comments

oscarfan1 OMFG IM CRYING

oscarfan2 smile heart eyes and blush make an appearance again

oscarfan3 he’s super proud you can tell by his eyes

oscarfan4 flexing his lawyer girlfriend as he should

oscarfan5 SO HIGH SCHOOL IS ABOUT THEM

oscarfan6 my definition of a simp

yourinstagram has added to their story

liked by yourinstagram, landonorris and 865,388 others

oscarpiastri My girlfriend is a lawyer 💙

view all 27,034 comments

oscarfan1 I LOVE THISSSSS

oscarfan2 WHAT IF I CRY

username1 that cake is too iconic i need it

georgerussell63 Congrats YN! ♥︎ yourinstagram

oscarfan3 the cake is that tiktok audio 😭😭

nicolepiastri We’re all so proud of you @yourinstagram 👩‍🎓🤍 ♥︎ by author, yourinstagram

↳ oscarfan1 mama piastri loves her they’re getting married

↳ yourinstagram love you! thank you for the unconditional support 🥺

charles_leclerc Well done 👏👏 ♥︎ by yourinstagram

lilymhe 💓💓💓 ♥︎ by yourinstagram

username2 imagine having a columbia degree AND a hot boyfriend i can’t relate

mclaren Our favorite lawyer 🧡 ♥︎ by author, yourinstagram

↳ oscarfan2 the mclaren intern just loves yn

oscarfan4 good time to remind everyone that oscar barely finished high school but he somehow bagged a lawyer girlfriend

landonorris Yooo congrats @yourinstagram I can speed while driving and pass red lights now that I have someone who can get me out or jail for free

↳ landofan1 LANDO PLEASE 😭

↳ yourinstagram please do not do that i beg you

landonorris You’re welcome for the cake idea btw

↳ oscarfan1 I KNEW oscar could never come up with that

↳ yourinstagram so it was you ! huh

↳ oscarpiastru Shhhh

yourinstagram i love you so much ❤️❤️ ♥︎ by author

liked by oscarpiastri, logansargeant and 69,736 others

yourinstagram you know how to ball, i know aristotle 🤍 proof that we’re both awkward for pictures

view all 904 comments

username1 CUTIES

oscarfan1 I LOVE THEM SO MUCH 😭

oscarfan2 they really said 🧍‍♂️🧍‍♀️ ♥︎ by author

mclaren 🧡🧡 ♥︎ by author

oscarfan3 they match each other’s freak

alexandrasaintmleux ❤️ ♥︎ by author

username2 you look so cute together

nicolepiastri My babies 🥺 ♥︎ by author, oscarpiastri

landonorris Hug your girlfriend wtf @oscarpiastri

↳ landofan1 😭😭😭

↳ oscarpiastri Don’t tell me what to do thank you very much

oscarfan4 that lyric is literally THEM

username3 pretty, smart and a swiftie we love to see it

oscarpiastri I’m the trophy boyfriend 🤍 ♥︎ by author

↳ username1 ugh i need a man like him

↳ oscarfan1 exactly oscar know your place

[clovers-housetree]

Activities for Regressors Without Caregivers! (or just fun regression activties!)

(Although you're always welcome here if you'd like any form of comfort anyway! ^w^)

This one's kind of a long one, after the few tips I list, I've mentioned an app I use called Finch, which will be talked about below the cut.

Since that's the case, I'll put my little ending message here instead:

Knowing how to take care of yourself can take a lot of work and practice, but I believe it's worth the effort, because then you'll be a happier and healthier you! Especially if you can find ways to make it fun!

I'm more than happy to be here for you and offer my support in any way I can, anyhow! I'm proud of you for doing what you can, I know it can be very hard.

I myself don't have a caregiver for when I regress, so most of the time I end up taking care of myself! Here are some fun activities and things I do when I regress to keep myself calm and happy! ^w^

Paci mentions/pics not long after the first section for those of you who'd rather not see 'em.

♥ Arts and crafts! I absolutely LOVE coloring and making bracelets with beads, something not too complicated for little hands, but also something fun!

With coloring, you can buy coloring books, or draw something of your own to color in- even printing out a page you find online, coloring digitally, or tracing over something to color in could work! I prefer coloring more than drawing personally because I don't draw all the time, but I bet I could learn a little thing or two from the artists around here!

For bracelets (and other jewelry), strings can be hard to knot with little hands (at least they aren't those small, slippery clasps!!), but the beads shouldn't be too hard to handle if you're careful! Even just planning out patterns is fun!

Here are some My Little Pony bracelets I made, and the decorations I did for my pacis!

♥ Making playlists! Dancing is fun, and a good way to get the zoomies out, but you can just make playlists for any occasion! I have playlists that help me pet-regress, songs with sounds I like, adventure playlists... (Well- a lot of these are still in progress, but- you get the point!)

I also love those playlist videos on YouTube! Animal Crossing, Super Mario Galaxy, Minecraft and music box music are typically my go-to to help me settle or just make for comfy background music! Here's one of my favorites, shadowatnoon has lovely Nintendo music mixes!

♥ Playing with your plushies! You can take them on adventures, or make your own!

Like Toby, climbing The Great Pillow Mountain!

(This is Toby by the way, he's one of my best friends and a VERY good hugger!)

You can play games with them, too! Toby's REALLY good at hide and seek... Maybe you can find him for me? :0

♥ Finding shows to watch! I really like Paw Patrol and Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles at the moment. Plus, you can look at agere content and fics from shows you like! People make really cool stimboards and moodboards, for example, and I like reading through all the fun stories people write!

Here's a silly picture of Rocky I found! :3

Finch

Finch is a self-care app where you take care of your very own little bird friend by taking care of yourself!

You can set daily goals, or for each day (or more specific ones as well I think.). By completing these goals, you give your bird energy to go on adventures! They usually come back with a funny little story or silly questions, because they're learning, too!

Through completing these goals (or daily, at least), you can get Rainbow Stones, which you can use to buy clothes for your bird, make them different colors, or give them furniture for their house!

They're also LGBTQ+ and disability-friendly!! :3

This is my little bird, Honeydew! You're welcome to friend me as well if you'd like, my code is: Z3E2T7VRK6

It's helped me learn a lot about taking care of myself and keeping track of my goals, and I get little rewards for it! I've used the app for several months now, and it's helped me out a lot!

"Fluttershy protects this blog! SFW interaction only, please and thank you! ^w^"

"Wouldn't show a kid? Doesn't belong here!"

[candy-rat]

☀️ˏˋ°•*⁀➷✧Puppy Love✧

♡ Percy Jackson x Fem!Apollo Reader

♥︎ Summary: you attempt to teach the cute boy you may or may not have some feelings for how to better work a bow and arrow. || Percy blurb!

☆ Warnings: None!

(ofc i know the relations between Apollo, Zeus, And Poseidon but the readers relation w Percy and the reader is the same w him and annabeth so use that info as u must) 

★ A/N:  I’ve only ever read the first and a bit of the second book + the two movies so this is based off the new series(Walker Scobell) + plus I have the BIGGEST crush on Walker Scobell.

♪ Credits: Ty Bunny’s RPH for the divider<3

+Barely Proof read

It was another sunny day at Camp Half-Blood, kids either chasing each other around or actually putting effort to train and what nots.

Surprisingly the archery field was as empty as ever, which is why you find yourself here.

As the daughter of Apollo you tend to neglect your gift of archery rather finding yourself in simple socialization, but today you thought differently.

Your dad would be proud, wouldn’t he?

As you were in the middle of your archery session you swore you heard the sound of bushes rustling.

The sudden noise caused you to turn around, trying to identify where the noise was coming from.

You were met with the sight of a boy.

Not just any boy.

Percy Jackson.

With earlier memory you can recollect, the boy was definitely not the best with a bow and arrow, so why would he be here?

“Uh, hi” the boy spoke up.

“Oh uh, hi?” You responded in a confused yet optimistic tone.

There was an awkward silence for a moment.

You’ve seen the boy on multiple other occasions, you never really talked to him before.

To be honest with yourself, you probably had the slightest crush on the boy.

The tiniest one of course, you barely knew him.

“So, do you need something? Or?” you spoke, breaking the silence.

“Oh! Uh yeah I did, yeah.” He replied with a slight crack in his voice.

Another moment of silence.

“Uhm, what do you need, uh Percy was it?” You questioned.

You didn’t need to ask, of course you knew his name.

It’s not creepy, word just gets around you know?

“Yeah uh that- that’s my name, you’re (Name) right? Daughter of Apollo?” He asked.

“Oh yeah, that’s me.” You replied.

“You’re like really good at archery right?” He asked once more.

“You could say that, being the daughter of Apollo kinda you know comes with it, but my older siblings are definitely better.” You confirmed.

“Well I was uh wondering-“ he responded.

“Mhm?” You simply hummed in reply.

“If you could, i don’t know uh teach me how to get better at archery?” He finally let out.

You looked at your bow and back at Percy.

You wonder exactly why he asked you.

Maybe he just came here in hopes to ask the first person he sees, or maybe he was looking for you specifically.

That’s a nice thought.

“Really?! Okay, I don’t mind!”you replied.

“You don’t?!” He replied.

“Of course not! I don’t have much to do anyway.” You giggled.

Before anything you told him the basics, how to stand, how to correct your breathing, and how to aim better.

The day went on.

Percy missed the target completely most times.

But once he finally got remotely close, you had to say you were proud of the blonde.

You were happy to even spend time with him.

“There you go Percy! That was great, you’re getting better!” You chuckled, swinging you arm over his shoulder squeezing him a bit.

He froze at the sudden contact for a moment.

“Thanks! I really c-couldn’t have done it without you, you know!” He went on blushing.

“Awe don’t sweat it, it comes naturally so I never need to put much in to it, but thanks!” You thanked the boy, feeling your face heat up.

Percy handed you the bow back queuing the end of your lesson.

“You know if you ever want me to teach you again I’d be happy to, just swing by cabin 7 I’m usually there.” You mentioned.

“Yeah sure, but about that-“ he started.

“About what?”

“Well uh, seeing each other again you know? Like not during training” He blushed.

“O-oh! Yeah i wouldn’t mind at all, I enjoy your company!” You responded.

“Really?!” Percy added.

“Yeah really.” You confirmed.

“I uh- like being around you too.” Percy smiled.

The two of you got along perfectly.

Like a puzzle piece.

You definitely had a crush on him.

He might like you back.

Percy definitely is too scared to confess anytime soon.

And maybe that’s good.

Love takes time.

Especially puppy love.

A/n: innocent puppy love is deff the vibe I’ll always go for with my Percy fics so hopefully I’ll have time to do more      (Miles 42 fic in the making!!!!)<3

[magics-neptunes-things]

Bang, Bang.

Hi guys!

So this is from this request and it won't be an happy one. It might contain some medical things who aren't right, but I'm not a doctor even if I made some research to write something logical.

Please enjoy and thanks again dear anon for your perfect request ♥

Also no proofreading for now, sorry!

TW : Fight between lover, gun, shooting, bleeding, hospital, coma, sadness and a lot of angst.

Champion’s league finale. You are playing with your team against Barcelona and more specifically your girlfriend’s team. The Spanish are looking for another cup to continue to break all the records, but your team is very motivated to stop them. It would be the first Cup for your club and for you, too. It’s not ideal playing against your girlfriend honestly, but you knew when you start dating that it was a risk to take.

Alexia and you are together for more than two years now, your forever crush becoming reality at a point during the Euro and when Alexia did her ACL. It’s not easy being away from your girlfriend, even if you are playing in Manchester city with some of your national teammates and friends (Laia Aleixandri and Leila Ouahabi).

The game is tough, at the end of the ninety minutes, each team has scored two goals. At the 93 minutes, you manage to take the best on the defender who is marking you, using your full speed after having received a very good pass from Laia. You can hear the crowd screaming, City’s fans encouraging you while Barcelona’s fans are booing. But when you are facing the keeper, you shut everything and send a cannonball in the upper corner of the net. The keeper can’t do anything.

You don’t have time to register that you just scored 1 minute before the end of the adding time, your teammates tackling you on the ground. This is a mix of jersey, hair, hug and pat on the head for several seconds, before the referee ask you to go back to your position to start the game again.

She made you play two minutes more to catch up the time you lost while celebrating, but Barcelona don’t score. Then the whistle resonate in the stadium and you just won the UEFA Champions League. Not knowing how to react, you stay still for many seconds, before someone jump on your back to train you in a group hug.

You don’t stay a long time though, you want to check on Alexia. You easily find your girlfriend sitting on the ground, her jaw clenched. There is no one around her, so you chose to go to see her. You promised each other that you won’t be resentful to the other, whatever the ending of this game is.

So you think nothing more than being a recomfort to your girlfriend when you arrive next to her.

“Hi” you say softly.

You don’t know if Alexia realized your presence before you talk, but the eyes she lays on you aren’t really friendly. But you decide not to stress about it, kneeling next to her to put a comforting hand on her arm.

“You played very well. I’m so proud of you for the way you leaded your team. And this goal was something else.”

You smile, referring to the second goal, a real banger from Alexia. She doesn’t answer anything, so you just continue talking.

“You can be proud of yourself too, you know? You did everything you could and gave all you could. It’s –“

“Can you please shut the fuck up?”

Alexia doesn’t look at you when she cuts you, but you can tell how angry she is just with the tone of her voice. You are surprised enough to stay quiet and she continues.

“Don’t act like you have all the merits on this win. Your team is lucky that some girls are injured and that we don’t have our usual team playing tonight. If we had all the players, we would have crush you. Don’t take your win for what it’s not. You are just lucky, this has nothing to do with talent.”

Well, you didn’t expect that. Alexia has always been supportive of you, but more generally she always has been respectful and fair play to her opponents. You realize that there is Leila and Patri standing behind you when Alexia gets up to go somewhere else.

“Alexia.” Patri says in a tone of reproach.

But your girlfriend doesn’t answer anything, still walking to the Barcelona’s bench. You can only look at her leaving, stunned by her reaction. You take Leila’s hand who helps you to get up.

“Don’t listen to her” Patri says before hugging you. “You were amazing.”

“Thank you” you mumble.

Leila hugs you tightly too, not without looking at Alexia with reproach too. After that, the ceremony has a bitter taste for you, to be honest. It can’t be seen on picture, you are smiling between Alanna Kennedy and Laia, raising the cup or kissing it. Or being kissed on the head by Laia.

But in reality, you just want to talk to your girlfriend. She didn’t look at you when she passed between the two lines of your team when she goes to take her silver medals. And then she just went to the locker room, not even watching you raise the cup. It hurts, as much as her words did.

But you try to be understanding, you know how bad your girlfriend deal with the idea of losing anything, probably taking all the mistakes on herself. You manage to catch her, hair down and wet, before she leaves with her teammates to take the bus to go back to her hotel.

“Alexia!” you call her.

You don’t see her sigh and roll her eyes, which is good otherwise you probably will be hurt a little more. She was walking with Irene and Ona and turn around to look at you. You already talked with the two others after the game, so you smile back at them when they smile to you before leaving both of you.

“What do you want?” Alexia says harshly.

You are a little stunned, by the tone of her voice and the question. But you don’t say anything, trying to ignore the strange feeling in your stomach. Alexia never talked to you that way. You almost never fought since you are together.

“Talk to you? Can we at least have some minutes together?”

There is a moment of silence.

“No. I don’t want to talk or see you right now.”

********

The celebrations are strange after that. You make all the efforts you can to keep a smile on your face and not ruin your teammate’s joy. Alanna and Leila are looking at you with intensity and you’re pretty sure that Leila told to Alanna what happened between you and Alexia. But you manage to keep them away from you enough to be able to leave as soon as Kerstin.

You tried several times to call Ale when you go back to your hotel, but she doesn’t answer. You prefer to think that she’s asleep and not ignoring you. You send her a message after that, hopping to have an answer during the night or in the morning.

You didn’t.

The morning after, when you wake up, you realize that there is no message from Alexia. Your social media are full of notifications but nothing from your girlfriend. You haven’t post anything either, not wanting to upset your girlfriend even more.

You were supposed to stay in Paris, where the finale was played, together for two days before going back to Barcelona. But with Alexia not giving you any news, you are really scared that she chose to go back to Barcelona without you.

After reading the list of your friends in the Barcelona’s team, you chose to try to call Ona. You can’t help but smirk when you hear Lucy’s voice instead of the Spaniard. But your friend comes several seconds after, and you are finally able to ask if she has news from Alexia.

You are relieved to learn that she’s still in Paris, and even more when Ona accepts to make you sneak in the hotel. Your plan is to go buy some flowers and chocolate for your girlfriend; this is her guilty pleasure. You discovered that during the first weeks of dating her.

After some research, you chose the best chocolate shop around your hotel and go to it to buy some. You take some time to select them, being sure that Alexia will enjoy every single one of them. When you are happy with it, you pay the box but add a cute white teddy bear sitting next to the cashier. No one seems to recognize you, which you are glad for. Like this you can take all the time you want.

You decide to walk to go to the florist, situated between the chocolate shop and Alexia’s hotel. The weather is great, sunny but not too hot. It’s still hotter than Manchester though.

The florist is very nice, and you look around while she’s serving other people who were already here when you arrived, right now it’s a family with a small girl smiling at you. You love the smell in here. The roses are amazing, and you ask the florist something with red roses in it. You look at her ease to make a wonderful bouquet with amazement.

“Tout le monde les mains en l’air !“

You hear the shout before you see the man, but the sweet florist’s face is suddenly very white. You don’t understand what was told, so you turn around to look what is happening.

There is a man with his face hidden behind a mask who is pointing a gun in your direction. You are glad that the family with the cute toddler left.

“A genoux!”

You don’t understand and you have to look around to know what he’s asking. The other raised their arms and are now kneeling, while you are still standing without moving.

That seems to make the man very mad. When you turn your eyes to him once again, he says something that might be a swear word. Then there is a sound of gunfire and the pain you feel is worst than anything you felt in your life.

You hit your head hard on the ground and suddenly the people around are screaming, but you don’t understand why. They are talking in French, and you have trouble to understand anything. It seems to you that the man got the money he wanted before leaving. The rush in your ears is very unpleasant and when you look at your chest, you realize that there is a big, red spot on your white shirt.

Suddenly there is a woman kneeling next to you, grabbing your face to make you look at her. It’s the florist.

“Hey! We called the ambulance, they are coming, ok? Stay awake, please.”

“I need to call Alexia” you breath, while taking your phone from your pocket.

“OK. I’ll press something on your stomach to stop the bleeding, ok?”

You just nod. Your hands are shaking while you open your phone, and your vision is blur when you look for your girlfriend’s number. It’s not hard to find though, she’s on the top of your list. You let the phone ring for several longs minutes before accepting the fact that Alexia won’t answer.

“She’s maybe still asleep” the girl points.

“No” you whisper shakily. “She’s mad at me. Those were supposed to be gifts for her”

“I’m sure she’ll love it”

You start to have trouble to breath. You close your eyes and try to take a big breath. You start to feel anxious too. Are you going to die without having heard your girlfriend’s voice a last time? Without being able to tell her how much you love her, how much she means for you?

You suddenly feels very tired, you understand what it’s mean. Fighting to open your eyes, you look for the woman’s eyes before talking. It seems like you don’t speak very loud, because she leans on you to understand.

“Will you tell her that I love her? Please. She always meant the world to me and I’m sorry that she’s so upset. Will you tell her?”

The woman’s eyes are wet when she talks to you.

“You will tell her yourself, Sweetheart.”

You know you won’t be able to. So you need her to promise you.

“Please. There are no words strong enough, but I love her more than anything. Will you give her my presents too? I wrote a card with the bear”

Your words are hard to pronounce, but you manage to say every single one of them, being sure to be understand. The woman nods and you feel relieved.

“I’m sure she loves you too.”

The woman cup your face and you decide to believe her. You close your eyes again and let yourself being wrapped by the memories you have with Alexia. The best of your life.

********

Alexia is sitting in a chair, her head in her hands. Everything seems unreal. Her eyes are red from crying, her throat is dry, and her head is pounding painfully. And she wonders if her breathing will be normal again at a moment.

She feels awful.

She was the worst girlfriend in the world for you and you never deserved it. You took the time to find her to talk to her even if you were probably drunk with the adrenaline of the win. You said sweet words to her, took the time to comfort her and she still had this behavior.

To be fair to her, she was really trying to find a way to come back to you to apologize. She was showering when you tried to call her after being shot, not knowing that you already made a plan with Ona to come to her.

Then, she received the worst call of her life. She’s the number one on your emergency calls so the hospital you were transferred to call her as soon as they could. It was three days ago, and she never left this room since.

You had a surgery and when she arrived in your room at first, you weren’t even here. Then they bring you in it and she learned that you probably won’t make it. But it’s been three days, and you are still here, your brain seems to still work correctly, and your heart is still beating.

You lost a lot of blood though and several of your organs got touched by the bullet. You are healing and it’s only because you are an athlete and in a very good shape that you are still alive.

Just when she thought that nothing could get worse, she received a visit that she didn’t except. She frowns at first when a cute girl entered your room with a teddy bear, a chocolate box and flowers. But then the florist explained to her what you ask her to do and that the precise moment where Alexia lost it.

You parents and Alexia’s mother join you in the hospital to be there for you, but for Alexia too. Ale’s mother never managed to get Alexia out of your room. Alexia sleep on the chair, Alexia eats the awful hospital’s food, Alexia takes shower in the bathroom of your room.

Sometimes she cries, sometimes she just looks at you. No one never heard her voice since she’s here. She’s so hurt that she feels like she can’t speak anymore. She only speaks to you when you both are alone. She’s so hurt, too, that she wants to rip her heart of her chest.

Alexia lost track of time, her mother and your parents left several hours ago now, and the sky is dark. The bips from the monitoring are still in the background, but Alexia doesn’t pay attention to them anymore. Unless they are making strange sounds, like yesterday. Your heart was suddenly in great difficulty.

The nurses explain to her after having stabilized you that it’s because your body need a lot to heal, and it could be hard for your heart.

The Spaniard keeps thinking that her behavior probably had hurt your heart so much that she’s responsible of your state. She is wrong of course, even if she was bad after the game, it’s not in any case of her fault.

When Alexia raises her head again to look at you, you are still with your eyes closed, your skin paler than ever. You are Spanish too, you have a natural tan skin, but now you look… ill. Alexia hates it.

“Mi Amor” she whispers while taking your hand in hers, her throat hurts when she talks. “I know you are doing everything you can to heal and come back. You don’t know what your life means to a lot of people here. Your parents, your family, your friends, your fans… Me, of course. But I don’t know if you steel want me after everything that happened. You got hurt because of me.”

If she wasn’t a little shit, you wouldn’t have been in this flower shop. That’s what she shouts to her sister when Alba tried to make her leave your room. Tears are rolling again on her cheeks, and you would probably kiss them if you were awake.

“I am so sorry. I’ll give everything to be at your place. I’m not able to ask it, but please come back. I need you so much. I don’t know how I am supposed to continue without you. You weren’t at Barcelona, but it’s seems like you are everywhere every time. Everything makes me think about you. I need you. Please. I’m so sorry.”

Alexia lost her father several years ago and it was heartbreaking, of course. Her father was her model when she was younger. Her guide. But you, you are the love of her life and she is convinced that she won’t survive your lost.

“Take the time you need to heal and then I’ll do everything for you to forgive me.”

Tears are rolling freely on her face, but she doesn’t care anymore since a very long time. She rather kisses your hand, relieved to feel the warm of your skin on her lips. Alexia frowns slightly while looking at your fingers though. They had to remove the ring you were usually wearing on your finger; the one Alexia offered you for your one year together. Alexia wears it around her neck on her chain, her fingers being too big to wear it on her finger.

“I love you. I’ll stay with you every second until you wake up.”

She means it and she did it. Even when they were other games played, she never left your side. They talked about transferring you in England, where you live, but Alexia refused, and your parents agreed with her. They never doubt about the love Alexia had for you; you never hide from them how good Alexia treated you during your time together.

You weren’t really aware of that to be honest. You were somewhere over the rainbow, far away from your girlfriend and the one you love. Even if it isn’t the case for Alexia, it’s better for you. Seeing Alexia’s distress would probably break you. You sometimes feel lighter, but you like to think that it’s the time when Alexia takes your hand or kiss it.

********

“We would like to make her try to breath without monitoring. We need to see if she’s able to breath alone.”

“No.”

Alexia’s answer is harsh and cold, but her mother puts a hand on her shoulder to calm her. Your mother is more diplomatic about her answer.

“Isn’t it risky?”

“Everything is risky” the doctor says, trying to ignore Alexia’s glare. “But her organs are better, and we need to revise her treatment. We will stop the monitoring for an hour, and we will check her oxygen constantly during the process.”

“What if she stops breathing?” Alexia asks.

“The chances are very rare. In fact,…”

“What. If. She. Stops. Breathing.”

Your father smirks when your girlfriend talks again, carefully articulating each of her words with cold anger. He always loved Alexia and he probably loves her even more right now.

“We will put her back on monitoring and try something else.”

Alexia snorts and crosses her arms on her chest. She hates that idea; she hates the idea that they are putting you in danger without any reason. She doesn’t say that it’s bullshit just because her mother is here and she is always careful about the words she chooses when Eli is around.

“I won’t leave her side a single second” she rather informs your medical team.

She doesn’t when they try, her eyes being on the screen with the indicator of your oxygen in your body or on your chest, watching it raise every single time. When one hour is passed and you are still breathing normally, she feels a little better. The medical team decided to let you like this for now, wanting to see if you can make the night.

The night pass and you are still breathing. Then a whole day.

“I’m so proud of you” Alexia whispered against your forehead before kissing it softly.

She explained to her mother how she treated you the next time you saw her, the guilt was eating her alive. Her mother didn’t try to tell her that she’s wrong to feel that way, Eli agreed with Alexia about how bad she was. She nevertheless comforts her daughter with words she knew were true. She remembers to Alexia how much you love her and that you still went to grab her presents before wanting to come to her.

Three days without monitoring and you are still breathing like you are peacefully sleeping. They are still feeding you with your catheter but other than that you don’t need anything to be alive.

Everything was fine and that’s why she panicked when you start to whine suddenly. Hands shaking, she jumps from her chair looking around before pressing the button to call the nurses. She doesn’t know what she managed to say, but the nurses start to talk way to fast in French, one of them taking her phone to call the doctor.

“What is happening?” Alexia asks, her breath almost impossible to take.

“We need you to leave the room for a little time” one of the nurses asks her.

“No way!”

“Alexia…”

Eli’s voice makes her daughter looks around, but the blond doesn’t move. She just shakes her head, informing every single person in the room that she won’t leave you. Bad or good news, she will be here. She needs to be here.

The three women don’t have the time to convince Alexia a little longer, because the doctor suddenly comes into your room, talking in French too and Alexia wonders if she will explode from frustration soon.

She sees several monitors coming into your room too and when your mother-in-law comes to your girlfriend to pass her arms around her shoulder, Alexia looks at her with lost eyes.

“Is that it? Is she dying?” she whispers.

Eli feels her heart break, but she doesn’t answer. She doesn’t know. She just cups her daughter’s face and keep her face on her chest. Eli doesn’t move when Alexia grip her arms pretty hard, tightening her daughter even closer to her, trying to protect your girlfriend from another lost.

The next minutes were agonizing for your girlfriend, and she can’t open her mouth when the doctor comes next to her. She doesn’t understand all the bip from the different monitors around you. She doesn’t know if you are still alive or not.

“She is ok” he says at first, having learn to understand Alexia through the days, and your girlfriend feels like she might faint from relieving. “I think she is trying to wake up. The next hours will be decisive.”

After that, Alexia sits even closer to your face to have a better look at you. Every night her mother goes back to the house Alexia rent for her and your family so they can be close to you.

She hasn’t sleep since more than twenty-seven hours when you move again. But this time you open your eyes and look around. You seem scared, your eyes looking around you.

“Sh Bébé, can you hear me?” Alexia whispers after having regained some composure.

Her hand is on your face, soft like a feather. She manages to calm you quickly and you nod very softly. Alexia sees it anyway.

“You are at the hospital. You are safe, ok? Just try to breath a little slowly.”

You keep looking at her, trying your best to calm yourself. You don’t know how many minutes have passed before you swallow your saliva and open your mouth.

“No. Don’t talk. Keep your energy, ok?” Alexia whispers again.

As your memories come back, you are relieved to see that Alexia is by your side. She looks like she hasn’t sleep or eat in the last two weeks, but you don’t leave her face with your eyes, even when she moves to let the doctor and nurses check several things on you.

You tiredly let them do what they want with you and Alexia never left you with her eyes either. She watches the medical team to be sure they are doing things right with you. When they talk to you in English, you are way to tired to understand what they are saying. Luckily, your girlfriend is here to translate in Spanish.

“They want to know if you are hurt somewhere. Don’t shake your head, just close your eyes two times if you are hurt and one if you are ok.”

You blink slowly one time. You are not hurt, you are tired. Your answer seems to relieve everyone around and you close your eyes to rest when they are talking in English again. Alexia answers something and you trust her to make things right. They are talking for several minutes before the silence is here again.

You open your eyes suddenly, scared that Alexia has left too. But she’s here, typing on her phone, informing your parents and family that you are awake. She seems surprised to see you watching her when she puts her phone down.

“I thought you fall back asleep” she says softly, turning her body to look at you. “Do you want to drink?”

You blink once and she almost run to get you a glass of water from the bathroom. If you were able, you probably have laugh at her. You hope to have a little of water in your mouth can help you to talk. Alexia uses the buttons of the bed to make you seat and is very careful in every of her move to help you drink.

“They said a little bit at time”

You oblige and the feeling is amazing honestly. You look at your girlfriend and you focus on your sentence before talking, not wanting to waste any energy.

“Did you get my presents?”

Your voice is awful, but it’s not a surprise. You don’t really know since when you are here, without talking. But you need to know.

Alexia turns in your direction and suddenly her eyes are wet with tears and her hands are shaking.

“I did. That sweet girl came in here to give them to me the first day. The flowers are here” she points them. “Thank you, even if you shouldn’t needed to get me any of this. We will talk about it later, but Y/N/N I’m so sorry. You didn’t deserve the way I treated you. You are the sweetest and most perfect girl in the world. And I love you more than anything.”

“Alexia…”

She puts her finger on your lips, putting you in silence.

“Keep your energy for when your parents are coming.”

You roll briefly your eyes and for the first time in weeks, Alexia smiles. Not her sometimes awkward smile, who makes you think about that Friend’s episode where Chandler is supposed to smile for his engagement’s pictures. You always teased her about it.

“I love you more than anything too” you whisper when she takes her finger back. “Stay with me?”

“Of course I will”

You don’t know that she never left your side since you are here. Just like her mother several hours ago, she cups your face with extra care before stroking your hair. Right to her words, Alexia never left you for a second and wait for you to be able to go back to Barcelona for your recovery.

********

Several Months Later.

“What would you think about me coming to play in England?”

In shock, you spit out the pudding you were innocently eating. Like every morning since your hospitalization, Alexia and you are talking over FaceTime while you are eating your breakfast. Like always, Alexia just came back from her morning jogging and is eating her breakfast too.

“What the hell are you talking about?” you ask, the choc passed.

“Me playing in Manchester? I really want to be close to you. I hate being so far away from you and being able to have you in my arms only for two weeks every two months.”

You probably are dreaming or hallucinating. You look at your girlfriend on your screen like if you were waiting for her to tell it’s only a joke. That’s what you are waiting, to be honest.

“Alexia, you will die in the English weather” you point. “And they are eating pudding and beans on a toast for breakfast here, I don’t know how you would survive.”

Your girlfriend rolls her eyes – just like she hates you do – and seems suddenly to find her tortilla very interesting.

“Don’t you want me there with you?” she asks with insecurity.

Since you got shot, you sometimes have the impression that she’s just waiting for you to break up with her. Something you will never do, how in the world are you supposed to live without your reason to breath?

“That’s not the point Cariño” you assure her with a smile. “I would love to be able to wake up every morning next to you.”

“What is it then?”

She’s almost pouting and you want to squeeze her cheeks with your hands.

“There is something I haven’t talked to you about.”

She looks panicked when she raises her eyes on your, turning your head back on you so quickly that you wonder if she hurts herself.

“What?”

“Don’t be mad, ok?” you begin, starting to eat your porridge again. “But I might have received an offer from Barcelona. I haven’t talk to you about yet because I wanted to be sure that it’s a real offer and that they are serious about it. City seems ok with me coming back to Barcelona, but nothing is signed for now.”

“Do you want it? Coming back?”

You look at your girlfriend thoughtfully. You understand where this question comes from, Alexia just wants to be sure that you are not doing things for her, but for you and your career.

“I miss Barcelona. I miss the Spanish weather, I miss my family… Sure I’ll miss Laia and Leila and the RFEF is still shit, but I want to give it a try.”

“Ok” Alexia smiles.

You can see that she’s thinking about something, but you don’t pressure her to talk. You know that it will comes when she will be ready. You finish your breakfast, talking about everything and nothing while Alexia looks at you from the corner of her eyes. The thoughts haunting her mind come out loud several minutes later.

“Are you going to go back to your parent’s?”

“Like living with them?” you raise an eyebrow before continuing when Alexia nods. “No, of course not. I’m 24 years old, I’m way to old to live with my parents again” you laugh softly. “Why?”

“I was thinking that there’s enough room in my closet for both of us. If you want it.”

“Are you asking me to move in with you?” you smile tenderly.

“Yes, if you want to?”

“I would love it, Ale.”

______________________________________________________________

To be honest with you I wanted to make R died but I can't stand a sad Alexia.

[icallhimjoey]

Almost, Always

♥ ♥          Joseph Quinn x Fem!Reader 

Summary: Happy endings aren't for everyone, so it seems, but that doesn't mean that you can't stop trying for one. Question is, are you actually star-crossed lovers that can figure something out, or just absolutely blind to reality and really fucking stupid?

CW / disclaimer: rpf, fem!reader, language, adult themes, smut, cheating

Author’s note: i want to thank @lfdybadgirlsdiw again, bc she sent in a small request that mentioned 'former lovers that keep going back to each other, even if they are seeing other people' which then sparked this whole story into existence 🖤 i also want to sincerely apologise to all the girls that have reached out and taught me that none of us lead unique lives (which in this case is terrible, but also, really comforting) thank you for reading! i hope you enjoy this last part, and i'd love to hear your thoughts!

Wordcount: 7.2K

part one - part two - part three - part four - part five

The world felt muted. Dull, and empty. Deeply hollow, and completely void of colour.

There was only so much shit a person could take before enough was enough, and finally, after accepting the bare minimum from Joe for far too long, you decided you no longer wanted it.

The sky hung heavy, and the beginnings of what would eventually feel like an endless winter promised to keep the mood low and bleak for the rest of the season. There was an under-skin discomfort only the passing of time was going to be able to shed.

You broke up with Joe.

It fucking sucked. There was confusion, and deep hurt. Anger. Defeat.

And yet, you felt weirdly proud of yourself.

“It’d be better for you to leave him.” Emily had told you time and time again. Finally, you’d listened. You knew she was going to be so proud, which gave a small sense of relief.

Everything else felt bleak, though. Like time had stopped on the moment of impact. Hands of the clock frozen in time, forever showing the point at which it truly landed for Joe.

Joe hadn’t felt like this for a long time. Didn’t know if he had ever felt like this before, if he was honest. There was a difficulty in processing the shock, in accepting there was even a shock to begin with, but he knew you were right. It was why he couldn’t stop saying it.

“Don’t feel bad, you’re right. You’re right.”

It felt wrong to be right, and you didn’t want to be right ever again if this is what it’d be like.

The little sliver of pride inside of you wasn’t getting the attention it deserved in the moment, but that was okay. You’d get to it later. And maybe, one day, Joe would too.

“Will you,” Joe broke the silence, voice hoarse and throat in pain. He cleared it, which didn’t help much, and hopefully finished, “Will you stay the night?”

You’d been sat in the quiet dark for quite a while, just listening to each other breathe. It started with Joe perched on the very edge of his sofa, leg shaking as he tried to come to terms with what you were saying.

You’d sat down next to him then, and he’d immediately pulled you close, hands gripping and trying their best to hold onto whatever there was for him to hold onto still.

Just was a shame there wasn’t much left for him to grasp.

“I don’t think I should.”

You wanted to.

Badly.

But you genuinely didn’t think that would be a good idea.

You felt how Joe shifted a little, arms moving to wrap you up differently from how they had been. He was unsure of how to hold you, but tried his best to find a way that made you want to stay.

“Yea. No… you’re right. You probably shouldn’t…”

If you weren’t absolutely determined, the soft brokenness of Joe’s voice would’ve made you give in instantly.

“But will you?” Joe tried again.

“Joe…”

“I know, I know, please, don’t…” Joe faltered. There were a lot of things Joe didn’t want you to do. Please don’t say it. Please don’t repeat yourself.

Please don’t leave.

There was a stillness that had taken over the room - the world - when Joe realised that you weren’t joking. A stillness where even the wind outside hesitated to stir. You weren’t saying shit just to get a reaction out of him. You weren’t trying to get him to say words you wanted him to say. You’d been serious from the second you’d walked into Joe’s flat, and Joe felt stupid how he had just… immediately dismissed you. How he hadn’t even really listened as you spoke to him.

It had been a few days since you’d seen each other, and you’d secretly been collecting and saving bravery. You’d avoided Joe for a few days whilst you kept busy, storing all the courage you could find in a secret spot inside of your body, waiting for it to be enough to drive you into just fucking saying it already.

Joe hadn’t questioned the stupid excuses you’d come up with to not see him a couple of nights in a row. Hadn’t questioned it at all, didn’t seem to really care about it either, which only added to your valour. To the ‘he doesn’t even give a shit’ narrative that you needed to believe with your full heart, because if you didn’t, you wouldn’t have decided to spontaneously text him, “on my way over” before flying out the door.

If you could stop your hands from shaking, that’d be great, but you were going to do this. You were going to ride this wave of determination, without or with a shaking body.

When you stepped into Joe’s flat, sick with nerves and heavy tension, Joe was hunched over a messy open drawer of a side cupboard.

“Have you seen my earphones? Wired ones?” he rummaged through with both hands.

No hi. No hello. No I’ve not seen you in days, come here, let me kiss you silly.

Have you seen my earphones.

The real important stuff.

“My wireless ones, the left bud has stopped charging itself…”

And you knew exactly where Joe’s wired earphones were.

For a second, you debated giving in. Debated using this as your out. Debated smiling, rolling your eyes all fondly, being the helpful girl Joe needed in this moment. It was tempting to forcibly forget about the one sentence you’d repeated inside of your mind over and over and over again since you’d walked out your door.

Fingers rubbed over the hems of your sleeves as you stood in the doorway still, and you felt where you’d rubbed literal holes into the fabric. 

“Pay a fucking fortune for nice ones and still, it’s the same bullshit, nice or not, it’s…” Joe finally turned his head to look at you when you remained silent. He watched you for a second before he stood up straight.

“Hey… you okay?” he frowned, hands fiddling with whatever junk he’d found instead of what he was looking for.

“I don’t… I don’t think I’m very happy anymore…”

There.

The words were out.

You’d said them, and even though you’d expected the world to maybe crack open and for everything to immediately go to absolute shit... nothing happened.

But you’d said the words, and the tiniest littlest speck of gratification popped up inside of your chest.

You had to actively remember how to breathe, but if you’d leave right now, at least you had said those words.

“All right,” Joe frowned a little, and cast his eyes back down to whatever his hands were doing. “What needs changing then? You can turn the heating up, if you want.”

Joe’s casual dismissal felt sharp as a blade, severing any hope of fixing this. Of saving it. It was completely mismatched to how tense you felt.

“No, I’m not…” you felt your knees shake as Joe continued rummaging. Suddenly, you were way more nervous to say those exact same words once again. “I’m not happy. Anymore.” You had to swallow straight after, mouth dry, tongue thick.

“All right,” Joe made an annoyed face at a random electrical wire he found, and continued, “So what needs changing then?”

His slight annoyance fed everything bad inside. Joe was unknowingly coaxing you into the exact right headspace for what needed doing.

“This.”

Joe still wasn’t looking at you.

“This what?”

Part of you wanted to show your frustration. The anger. Wanted to clench your fists and exhale roughly through flared nostrils to show him, to make him see. You wish you wanted to raise your voice and fight. But the unrelenting defeat of the moment rooted itself deeper inside of your body. The lack of care coming from Joe, the attention he wasn’t giving you, the dismissal of what you’d just told him, because his wired earphones were obviously so much more important than you were... it all combined into nothing more than a simple shrug.

You remained calm, protectively flat, and just… shrugged.

“This.”

You repeated yourself once more, and when Joe didn’t even seem to properly hear you, you looked at the open door that lead to the hallway which had his bedroom at the end of it.

You knew where Joe’s wired earphones were.

What followed were slow and measured footsteps that carried you over into Joe’s bedroom where you found the wired earphones in one of his bedside tables before you slowly made your way back over to him.

With a soft hand, you reached for one of his and held it in yours, palm up, to place the earphones into.

“Oh! Where did you find–”

“I think I need to stop thinking that things are going to ever be different…”

You looked Joe in the eye, and it was like he only then noticed what he was looking at. Like the earphones being found closed a chapter, and now there was attention for you and, oh, you didn’t look very happy.

“It’s never going to be different… is it?”

You looked very sad, actually.

Sort of drained of life.

Really tired.

“Hey, are you all right?” Joe discarded his earphones to the side and grabbed hold of one of your elbows, pulling you a little closer.

“Things aren’t going to ever be different, are they?”

You saw how Joe copied the knit of your eyebrows, face going from a little confused to very suddenly filled with deep worry.

“Wait, what do you mean?”

“Like, with us. This.” You stepped back, just slightly, creating distance.

“Are you… are you being serious right now?” And Joe stepped forward, moving right along with you to close that distance again.

“I think...” you sighed, eyes closed but back straight and chin up. Strong. “I think I need a change.”

“Baby… a change like what? What are you talking about?”

One of Joe’s hands cupped your cheek, thumb pushing underneath your jaw, taking the weight of your whole head as he tipped your head just right for eye-contact.

“Joe, I’m not… this isn’t what I want.”

“Me?”

No.

“Us.”

“Oh…”

Joe’s eyes moved between yours, searching for the slightest little bit of softness you still had for him.

He found it easily.

“I’m sorry.”

But he hadn’t expected the compassion there to be sympathy and pity for the situation you were placing Joe into.

At first, there’d been a surge of angry confusion. Of Joe stepping back and jokingly accusing you of being daft. Of telling you that your heart had frozen over because he probably hadn’t turned the heating up high enough. He asked if you’d eaten. If maybe you’d been drinking. Anything to make sense of what was going on, of why you’d walked into his flat on a random evening to tell him things he didn’t want to hear.

Then, there’d been yelling. Hurried large steps got paced around his living room, his arms flying about in unrestrained wild gestures. “You keep referring to past mistakes! You always say you forgive and forget, but you’re not forgetting shit!”, “Have you been hanging out– did you just come straight over from Emily? Has she been planting shit into your brain that you– you can’t actually be fucking serious right now!”, “God, this is so fucking annoying! You’re being annoying!”, “Are you sure this is what you want to do? The worst. Just the fucking worst!”. Joe’s voice went up as he screamed, cracking when he got too passionate, and you wished that had been new information to you.

Eventually, there’d been a weird composed faux acceptance that felt like a manipulative tranquility that Joe adapted to simply show you that you didn’t actually want what you were asking for. A childish, ‘Fine, I’ll give you what you want, see how it sucks?!’ just to prove to you that you were wrong.

When you didn’t budge, and it all finally really landed, everything changed.

Joe turned soft.

Went from frantic movements to suddenly sighing the deepest sigh he’d ever sighed to slowly making his way over to you, hesitating slightly when moving in to hug you, but then going for a full both-arm-tight-wrap-up when you didn’t flinch away.

After about a minute of tightly embracing, you heard Joe sniff close to your ear, and you realised he was crying.

“Joe, I’m sorry, I–”

“No, no.” Joe pulled back, used his sleeve to quickly wipe at his face before going, “No, look at me. Look. You’re right. I’m the one- no, look. I’m the one who’s sorry. I’m sorry. Don’t– you’re right, you’re…” Joe moved both his hands into his hair, a flash of panic, and had to take a few steps as he inhaled deeply.

“You’re not annoying.”

You saw how his jaw clenched. How he rapidly blinked to keep further tears at bay.

“I don’t know why…” Joe started, sitting down on the edge of his sofa as he rubbed a hand across his face. “It just… it never even occurred to me that you had the option to… to go anywhere. But you’re right.”

You didn’t care about being right. It didn’t feel nice to be right about something so devastating.

Looking at Joe, broken boy unsure of where to steer his thoughts and his emotions, you knew this wasn’t what you wanted. This wasn’t what you’d envisioned for the both of you. But, to be fair, almost nothing about what you’d become together had come about because you’d envisioned it that way.

You moved to sit down next to Joe and got immediately taken a hold of.

“Will you stay the night?”

“I don’t think I should.”

“Yea. No… you’re right. You probably shouldn’t... but, will you?”

“Joe…” you couldn’t tell him you would. Couldn’t reply with the ‘I will’ he wanted from you.

“I know, I know, please... don’t…”

If you weren’t going to stay the night, at least Joe would have this. Long quiet minutes, sat on his sofa together. Touching. Staring into nothingness. The longer he could keep you there, the better.

He found new ways to hug.

Different ways to hold.

Arms moved, swiped, squeezed and felt, mapping your every inch in a desperate bid to remember.

Joe took hold of the back of your neck in the exact way he knew you liked, thumb pressing into the dip at the base of your skull, rubbing small circles there.

And you gave him that.

Gave him this moment, frozen in time, just before you’d eventually walk out without plans of ever returning.

“You do know,” Joe started off, voice barely there in a whisper, words pressed into the skin just behind your ear. “You know that I really do love you, don’t you?”

And the world shattered.

The first real and sincere I love you that you’d ever gotten from him.

That wasn’t meant to hurt like it did.

“You know that right?”

All you could do was give a small nod that Joe felt with his face as you fought with all of your being to not burst into tears.

“I love you.”

The cruelest goodbye present you hadn’t asked for, thrusted into your lap at the worst possible time, and you had no other choice than to just simply accept it.

“Yea... love you, too.”

You can see him in the reflection of the window that the treadmills are aimed at, leisurely strolling into your line of sight. Towel over his shoulder, wearing his grey hoodie, wired earphones already in his ears, and eyes on his phone as he seems to sort through a playlist.

It’s been a day.

One single day.

One day since you’d woken up on his sofa.

One day since you’d said yes to a morning coffee that you probably shouldn’t have said yes to.

One day since you’d called the guy in your flat and had to explain why you’d left him in your bed on his own in the middle of the night.

One day since Joe sat across the table from you, coffee in hand, and listened to you stutter through vague excuses.

One day since you’d groaned at yourself for being so fucking stupid, and asked Joe, “What the fuck are we doing...”

One day since he’d shrugged and regretfully told you he wished he had an answer to that question.

To all of your questions, for that matter.

Joe showing up to your gym isn’t coincidental. It simply can’t be. It makes no sense for Joe to go to the gym that’s right around the corner from your flat.

There’s also no way he hasn’t seen you.

There’s not a chance he doesn’t know you’re here.

This is what Joe does, what he did just a short while ago, and he goes about it in almost the exact same way.

His slow pace gives him away.

The fact that he stops just as he has passed you, giving the free treadmill next to yours a quick glance as if he’s only just decided, yea I can do a bit of cardio here, why not, gives him away.

The moment his fucking awful purple pumas touch the machine next to you, you stop looking at him in the reflection. Eyes straight ahead. You keep them firmly trained on yourself instead, and keep a steady pace.

Yea. You hate the gym.

But you’re here to work out, and work out only.

Not to socialise.

Not to potentially run into someone.

Not to prove to someone, to anyone, that you’re a person that goes to the gym now.

No.

You’re there to work out. Guilt has been slowly eating at you until the anxiety of it all, the extreme criticism aimed at yourself, became too much and physical exercise seemed like the only healthy way out.

The only healthy way through.

You’re working out to feel better about yourself, about the choices that you’ve made, and you fucking hate every single second of it. But, you’re only about halfway through what you’d set out to do, and the plan is to fucking finish it. To do the full routine, no ifs ands or buts.

From your peripheral vision, you can see how Joe turns the machine on and how he throws the screen of yours an obvious glance.

Then, he sets the speed to just a little faster than yours.

Idiot.

For a little while it’s easy to ignore him. Makes sense, since you’ve gotten a lot of practice over the years. You could look right through him if you wanted to, face blank, eyes all hollow. Sometimes that was just what he deserved, and you remember how it always felt shockingly good to push his buttons by simply pretending he wasn’t there.

You’re an expert in driving this man insane.

But driving him insane isn’t the end goal here – instead it’s trying to hold yourself together, to harden yourself just enough, to not let him drive you insane.

So you ignore him.

Focus on your breathing. The whirring of the treadmill. The miles you’ve already run. How may more you have to go. Your own heartrate. The position of your feet.

Left. Right. Left. Right.

Breathe in, in.

Breathe out, out.

God, you fucking hate running, but there’s something that itches you about the fact that Joe put the speed of his treadmill a half mile per hour faster than yours.

And it’s not a fair race – which is what this fucking is now: a race – because he’s just wandered in and you’ve been going for a while already.

But maybe that’s actually good.

This guy’s not warmed up. Just got on the treadmill and started bolting.

Idiot.

It doesn’t take long for Joe’s breathing to pick up. For it to become audible to you, and you know he’s not going to be able to keep this up much longer. 

Just when you think Joe’s going to reach over and lower the speed of his treadmill, you decide to double down on this inevitable win and press the plus button twice.

Twice.

And fuck, you immediately regret it. The burn in your legs is merciless. An unforgiving persistent ache, yet the burn in your lungs is worse.

In, in. Out, out. In, in. Out, out.

Some of the sweat that’s dripping down your face gets stopped by your eyebrows, yet some also gets past and goes straight into your eyes, but fuck off, you’re winning.

You can do this.

You can pretend you just wanted to run extra fast for a minute. Maybe two.

Four minutes.

You manage four minutes before your start getting scared your legs are going to turn into actual jelly. For fear of tripping over your own feet and launching yourself backwards across the gym floor, you have to slow it down.

The second you do, Joe does as well.

It feels like your lungs have forgotten how to absorb oxygen, but you’re walking, and it’s fine. You did slow down your treadmill before Joe did, but you ran faster than him and, all together, ran for much longer, so it’s a win.

You’ve won.

You’ll die on this hill– you won and Joe lost and he is a loser.

There’s another moment where you can see Joe glance over, and even though you’re both at a walking pace, he still goes to adjust his speed so it’s higher than yours. Then, he removes his earphones.

Time to acknowledge his presence.

“You don’t go to this gym.” You manage to say before Joe gets a chance to get a word in.

Shit, you’re panting.

“I don’t?” But so is Joe. “Weird place for me to be then.”

You give him a look.

“Why are you here?”

Joe pulls a face he always pulls when he’s about to make a joke. It’s a stern face that’s hiding a smile so well, it just looks like he’s a frowning asshole.

“Hmm. Why... am I here?” he repeats seriously, pensive, like the answer escapes him. Then he looks around and uses an arm to showcase the gym he’s in, like it’s obvious he’s there to work out. It makes you feel like he’s making fun of you, which immediately stirs up animosity inside you.

“Well,” you start collecting your things. Towel, water bottle, phone. “Good luck. Get swole, or whatever.”

And you’re off.

“I’ll see you for a coffee, after!” Joe calls after you, and when you turn your head, you see him smirk as he wipes his towel across his forehead.

“No thanks!” you make yourself sound as polite and upbeat as you can whilst turning him down.

Joe watches you walk away, past some of the rowing machines, and he sees how other guys glance a look at you.

He doesn’t blame them.

If he’s honest, he doesn’t really know what he’s doing here, just that he wants to be near you. If that means going over to yours unannounced just to see you cross the street and enter the gym, rushing back home to get his own kit and making his way back over to get a guest pass, and then super casually accidentally ending up on a treadmill next to you, well, then... that’s what he’ll do.

Joe doesn’t know what he’s doing.

What you��re doing.

Why he’s been excited every time he’s seen you over the past couple of months. Why he’s been sad every time you parted ways again.

He doesn’t know why you keep coming back after you ended it all, but what he does know is that it must mean that it’s not over.

Not fully.

There’s a door there, still open enough for him to squeeze through, and yesterday, he realised he would actually rather hurt himself whilst struggling to get through your door, than pick any of the other doors that girls are holding wide open for him.

Joe watches you make your way over to the weight machines and you decide to pretend Joe’s not really there. Decide to pretend that there’s not something dangerously delightful about seeing Joe all sweaty and out of breath.

You get on with your work out routine.

Do the leg press for a bit. Some leg curls. Some extensions.

Nothing for the arms.

You have no upper body strength, and Joe’s watching. You’re very much doing your best to pretend he’s not there, but, you still find yourself secretly checking if you’re being watched.

And you are.

You ignore the furious blush on your cheeks and tell yourself it’s just because your exercising. The heat you feel in your face is just there because you’re moving. S’got nothing to do with Joe, who’s in your peripheral vision the whole time.

He’s strategically moving across the gym floor, standing in front of mirrors that reflect the best views of you, and yea, sure, he’s holding weights in both his hands, but he’s not really doing much, is he? He’ll curl an arm up every couple of seconds, but there’s barely any effort there.

Which makes sense.

Joe’s busy watching.

He’s watching you work out as discretely as he can.

He knows you’re aware of it too. Knows you’re following his whereabouts. Sees you check over your shoulder a little more often than seems normal to check your surroundings. Knows you’re having the absolute worst time because you hate physical exercise like this, but he watches as you power through.

Watches as you seem to finish up.

Watches you leave for the changing rooms, and he quickly does the same. Drops the weights he was still holding right where he’s standing and rushes to get his things because he wants to be ready and waiting by the door when you walk out.

You’re faster than expected.

Joe’s only just left the men’s changing rooms, zipping up his jacket, when he sees you emerge from the women’s.

You see him too.

Of course you do.

But you look right past him as you leave the building, and Joe has to scramble to get the door before it smacks him in the face as he follows you out.

“That was a quick shower.” Joe muses, following your tail.

“I shower at home.” You simply answer, looking for traffic both ways.

“Yea? Can’t tempt you into getting a quick coffee together somewhere?”

Joe dashes after you as you cross the street and comes to walk next to you.

“I’ve got coffee at home.” You dismiss him, but Joe hasn’t given up half his morning for you to suddenly use your sound, responsible mind. Not after yesterday.

“Oh, great. Even better.”

For whatever reason, even after all the interactions you’ve had with Joe post break-up, this feels like the first time it means something. Maybe it’s because it’s been a literal single day since you woke up next to him on his sofa, or maybe it’s because it was a little difficult to look at yourself in the mirror after.

You stop walking abruptly and it takes Joe two whole steps to realise you’re no longer next to him.

“What are you...” you falter, brow furrowed as you look at him.

“Doing?” Joe finishes for you, then shrugs. “I don’t know. I’m doing what we do– what we have been doing.”

He says it so plainly, like there’s not a million things wrong with that. Like he hadn’t invited you over to stay the night at his flat when there was a whole other person in his bed, likely wondering why the fuck she woke up on her own, just like the guy you’d left in yours.

You’re terrible people, and what Joe is meant to do, is self-loathe in his own time until the feeling has faded enough for a new bout of dumb decisions. You know, like you’re doing.

“You can’t just–...”

“Can’t what?”

Your eyes fall to Joe’s stupid trainers, his faded ugly purple pumas, and you hate how you like that he wore them.

This is never going to be over, is it?

You know with every fibre of your being that you shouldn’t.

But, fuck.

You want to.

You really, really want to.

“Don’t you feel bad?” you ask, hoping that at least Joe will confirm that you’re not overreacting.

You should feel bad.

The both of you.

There’s the slightest moment of introspection from Joe that you see across his face before he smiles at your rosy cheeks and goes, “I do. But not... not about this. What does it matter if I want to go and have a drink with you? Hmm? Who cares about that?”

Well.

Probably that girl that slammed the door of his flat yesterday. And, you also kind of hope that he cares, but it’s difficult to sort through and articulate your thoughts and feelings about that in the moment.

“Do you feel bad?” Joe asks, a hand reaching over to touch you on the arm.

“I feel terrible...” you admit on a heavy exhale. You also feel sweaty and sticky and gross.

“I’m sorry.”

“Yea, well... you should be. Because it’s your fault,” you show the slightest of smiles and fall back into step. “And because your shoes are ugly.”

Joe watches you walk away for a bit, trying to wrap his head around it. Around you. Finds that he was right before: he just wants to be near you, still.

He just wants to be near you always, actually.

He’s lucky you’ve got the same issue.

It’s why you let Joe into your flat.

Why the first thing you do when you get in is make Joe a coffee since he was so adamant about having some.

When he sees that you’re not making yourself a cup, he goes and does it for you. Makes you the perfect cup of coffee, exactly how you like it, and you have to really hide how giddy that makes you feel. Can’t give away how that means something to you. So instead, you make him laugh when, in lieu of sugar, you slide a salt shaker across the table, just because you think Joe needs to know that he’s welcome here, but that he’s not really... welcome here.

“You’re so annoying, my God.” Joe shakes his head, fondness practically dripping from the words as he smiles. He’ll make you a million more cups of coffee if it means you’ll make him laugh like that.

In turn, you laugh at jokes Joe makes about you going for your shower, telling you that you must be exhausted and he’ll gladly help out and hold you up. You know, no big deal, even though he remembers that your shower is small and barely fits two people in.

“We’ll just have to stand really close together.” you quip, joining the bit.

“It will be so awkward for me, but I’ll self-sacrfice, not a problem.”

You laugh together, and Joe drinks the coffee you made for him, and you drink the coffee that he made for you. There’s a moment of silence before you semi-seriously say, “I’m really not meant to have you over.”

It’s complicated. It’s fine, but it’s not.

“Yea... you probably shouldn’t. You’re right.” Joe flirts. “You’re right.”

“I don’t know what I was expecting though...” you sigh, leaning back in your seat. “We’re not to be trusted, I don’t think...”

Joe eyes you for a short moment, then leans forward a little and carefully says, “You’re allowed to set your expectations aside every once in a while, you know... we can just enjoy our time. Nothing wrong with that.”

You can’t help but smile, because the sentiment is sweet, but unfortunately, it doesn’t really work like that. Before you know it, you’ll be back right where you were before, kicking yourself over placing yourself back in that same crappy situation.

A grimacing discontented nose-scrunch does all the talking for you.

“All right,” Joe says on the back-end of a sigh, slapping both legs as he gets up, already heading towards the door. “I know when I’m not wanted.”

You put an arm out and get a handful of his sleeve before he gets even close to leaving, and Joe turns his head to grin at you like you’d played directly into his trap.

Which, you probably just had done.

Had been doing.

“Oh?” Joe startles playfully. “Am I wanted, then?”

The handful of shirt gets pulled into your direction until Joe’s standing really close, and you have to tip your head back all the way to look up at him.

“Do you want to hear me say that I want you?” you challenge his neediness as one of his hands finds your cheek. You know exactly that’s what he wants to hear.

“Is that hard for you?” he challenges your obduracy right back, thumb softly rubbing the skin under your eye, knowing full well how hard of a time you have with sharing your feelings in the moment.

It’ll never be lost on you how there’s so little you can hide from one another. It’s comforting in the most perilous of ways.

It helps that Joe is very upfront about his wants. He’s in your living room for a reason, which makes it a little easier to admit to a truth you can no longer deny.

You wouldn’t have invited him over if you didn’t want him here.

Obviously.

It’s a big ask to set expectations aside in the long-term, but in the short-term, temptation and comfort always seem to win all too easily. Hence the handfull of fabric you’re still holding.

That doesn’t meant that Joe deserves the satisfaction of hearing you say that, though.

“No.” you smile, eyes casting downwards. “But… do you want to know what is hard for me?”

Without any hesitation, you let your hand find the bulge in his jeans, and Joe flinches at the contact, his other hand immediately around your wrist to control your next move, grip tight, like he’s using it to not lose his balance.

“Don’t.”

With his eyes shut, he exhales a slow breath.

“Oh?” your eyebrows shoot up in the same way his had done earlier. “Am I wrong, then?”

Joe has to bite back a smile, and there’s a moment where you’re just staring each other down, your hand touching growing parts of Joe, and his hand keeping it right in place. It’s hard for him to look away from your eyes and the sparkle they look at him with.

It’s a big ask to set expectations aside... when you haven’t really got any to begin with.

Joe’s voice comes out a little gruff when he says, “How about that shower?” all lowly, giving a slight nod up in question as he bites into his bottom lip.

The only way out seems through.

But, just before you give in all over again, something pipes up in your mind that turns you solemn. Something Joe said the night before.

“You um...” you swallow thickly and slowly remove your hand from Joe’s jeans. “You said we weren’t the best, before...”

This dance between heartfelt earnestness and teasing banter is becoming a little confusing, but, to be fair, everything about you and Joe is confusing.

Joe’s hand on your cheek is warm, and you let the words you’d just said linger. Let them speak for themselves. You haven’t asked Joe a question that needs an answer, but you wait for him to figure out what you mean all by himself.

Why should you go have a shower with Joe if he doesn’t think you’re good together? If things can’t be better than before?

“Before...” Joe repeats and then slowly lowers himself next to your chair and leans on a knee so he’s more at eye-level with you. He’s choked with tenderness for you, especially when you look like this, not unlike what you looked like when you barged into his flat a night ago. “Before, yea. But that was–...”

Then.

This is now.

Joe’s hand is still on your face, his steady touch unmoving, but now his fingers curl under your jaw and around your ear, and it burns your skin. You want to allow yourself to enjoy the gentle touch, but you can’t. Shouldn’t. Your wants are too risky.

Anxiety swells and you can feel how your fingers are searching out a bit of fabric to run along, but you’re not wearing long sleeves. It’s why your next question comes out all choppy.

“Will it b-be different?”

Your question implies a whole lot. Implies a want for something new. For something better. Something different. And, perhaps most terrifyingly, it implies a want for something together.

You think if Joe is going to be completely honest with you, he should tell you no. However, logically, you also understand there’s a current heavy throbbing in his underwear that might influence things slightly.

Still.

You want to hear his answer.

Want to know what he’s really doing here.

What his expectations are.

Joe can’t predict the future. But you desperately want him to.

“It can be.”

Instant disappointment.

In Joe, and within yourself.

It can be.

It’s the most non-committal answer Joe could’ve given. It’s guarded. Evasive. Without clear indication or attitude of feeling.

You hate it.

But then you watch as he slowly grabs hold of one of your hands and guides it to the sleeve hem of the hoodie he is wearing where your fingers immediately find home and rub to their hearts content. It’s embarrassing how your shoulders instantly relax.

Joe clears his throat, cradling your face in both of his hands now, and adds, “It should be.” which he makes sound like a promise.

It should be.

It should be because you are both older and wiser and have learnt lessons and have grown. It should be because you are new people, with old habits but with new intentions.

It should be because you really want it to be.

It should be because Joe is really going to try.

That’s all you want.

All you need.

It should be makes you whine and drop your head fully into Joe’s hold.

It should be has you accept Joe’s lips that press firmly against yours.

It should be allows you to be picked up and lead over to your bathroom where you both undress at lightning speed.

It should be has you under the stream before the water’s even fully warmed up, standing really close together, and not just because the shower’s small.

Emily’s absolutely going to kill you.

But she’s allowed.

She can murder both you and Joe together, and you’ll continue doing what you’re doing right now in whatever the afterlife even is until the end of time itself.

Time can stop, for all you care.

Joe touches you in the shower until your legs can quite literally no longer carry you, and then Joe touches you in your bed until every single cell of your body is violently shaking in pure delight.

It should be different.

It will be different.

And different starts right fucking now.

“I love you.”

Joe pants the words heavily into your skin. Into your neck, your collarbone, your shoulder. Wants them to settle there and never leave. He seals them in with kisses, and repeats mumbling praise that he hopes will cling onto you for a while as well.

You’re convinced he’s just saying things because it feels right in the moment. Because he wants to prove to you that he’s right.

You lay together, bodies on top of each other, and it takes longer than feels normal to come back down from what you’ve just done. Joe holds you in place on top of him, both his hands wrapped around your arms, and when you try to move, when you try to let yourself slide off and fall onto the mattress next to him, he only further strengthens his grip.

“I love you.” He then says more clearly, and he sounds like he’s admitting it to himself just as much as he is to you. Like it’s something that he needs to hear himself articulate more than it’s something that you might need to hear.

It’s unbelievable that he’s here, right now.

He fully thought you’d be done with him by now, yet, here you are, wanting more of him. Different. Yes. But more all the same.

“Love you, love you, love you.” Joe punctuates with kisses.

Joe finds that he’s still as full of emotion for you as he was when you were still together, but there’s a huge difference in voicing it. In saying things aloud for other people to hear.

For you to hear.

“Yea,” you smile, tickled by the tone of Joe’s repeated confession, convinced you’ve pulled the words straight from his dick. “Yea you do.”

There’s no way Joe is thinking with his brain right now.

A soft scoff comes from him before he tries his best to sound like a schoolteacher as he demands, “Say it back.”

You huff a laugh to that, still feeling a little floaty and too far gone for a coherent response. All you can think about is how Joe’s still inside of you, and how he is keeping you there.

Then one of his hands lets you go, but is quickly followed by a well-aimed poke to your side that has you squirming. Joe remembers all your vulnerable spots, knows exactly where they are, fucking dick.

“Say it back! Say, I love you too, Joe.”

In your giggling, you manage to sit up a little and glare down at Joe, but you’re smiling, which completely ruins the effect, and it turns him a little soft inside. You then lean back down a little and give him a peck by his ear which serves to shut Joe up.

He decides it’s enough of an answer, close enough to an I love you said in return. He knows you do, anyway.

In your next move, you snuggle into him, cheek rubbing into his skin, and, fuck, Joe’s done for.

“Yea… yea, you love me too.”

“Shut up.” You whisper, giggles stuck in the back of your throat that you try your best to contain, ones that Joe lets out easily.

“Too bad you’re so annoying.”

“Yea.” You squeeze Joe tighter and let your teeth scrape the skin of his chest. “I’m the worst.”

There’s no phone buzzing on the bedroom floor.

There’s no other people hiding in a different room in your flat.

No... Jessicas, or whatever. No Jaspers.

You’re in the centre of your bed together, no sides picked or chosen, and the temperature inside reflects neither icy Antarctica nor the Amazon rainforest.

It should be different.

Better.

It already is.

Are you risking making the same mistakes all over again? Yes. Are you willing to still go ahead and give this a try? Also yes.

“Will you stay?” Joe quietly asks, silently and warily bringing up how vulnerable he felt when you broke it all off months ago.

You move your head to look him in the eye for a second.

“I should.” you whisper back, reassuring you in same way Joe had reassured you.

“Will you stay?” you repeat Joe’s question, but know what he’s going to say before he even opens his mouth.

One of his hands snakes around to hold you by the back of your neck.

“I will.”

the end

---

The Taglisted

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taglist currently full, apologies!

[pink-amethyst-tarot]

🤍 Why You Should Be Proud Of Yourself 🤍

credit to @crystallilytarot for the idea 💕

P I L E 1 P I L E 2 P I L E 3

Close your eyes, take a deep breath and choose the pile that you think is the one for you ♥

P I L E 1 - You have come so far! Four of Swords, The High Priestess, Two of Pentacles, Eight of Pentacles, Ten of Pentacles, The Fool, The Magician

The first thing I heard before even pulling cards is The Party's Just Begun by the Cheetah Girls and that feels like a sign that you should be having fun, dancing and living your life to the fullest! Your life can be so beautiful if you let it.

You know much more than you think that you do. I feel like you are back and forth between losing faith in yourself and feeling like you are finally breaking through. (I know what that's like, I've been there too much.) You've got to cut yourself some slack. Yeah, it's not perfect now but, you have made so much progress and that is important. You are so much closer to the finish line than you realize. Don't give up now. You've worked too hard and have come too far to give up now.

party cuz you know the future's all yours // dance 'til your feet don't touch the floor // celebrate the day you've waited for // party like you're ready for so much more // do it like you know it's never been done // go a little crazy // have too much fun //today's the day, c'mon everyone // the party's just begun //

Channeled song - The Party's Just Begun by The Cheetah Girls

P I L E 2 - Going With The Flow Two of Pentacles, Nine of Pentacles, Two of Wands (Reversed), Six of Pentacles, Justice, Queen of Pentacles, Eight of Swords

Despite your fear of change, you have overcome, finding your balance in your life and either now or soon, you will be enjoying the fruits of your labor. That could be financial abundance for this pile - it seems pretty likely, considering all the pentacles. You have been a very giving person and now it's time that people start giving to you in whatever way that may fit you.

You should also be proud of yourself for getting yourself to a point where you don't feel sorry for yourself. You've done the work to really see the truth of the situation - where you have been both right and wrong - and you've seen that you aren't as stuck as you once thought.

P I L E 3 - You've opened your heart again! King of Cups, Ten of Swords, Seven of Swords, Seven of Pentacles, Ace of Swords, Eight of Pentacles (Reversed), The Moon, Ten of Cups

You've been through some hard times. I feel like your heart was really bruised and batter but, despite the things you have been through, you have taken your lemons and turned them into make lemonade! I can see some of you turning to writing, journaling, or posting on social media. You have been working on yourselves and you are so happy with the progress you've made. You should be proud of yourself; I know I am! This work you have done on yourself is leading you to a new beginning in your life, a change of pace that you have be dying to have!

Your dreams are coming true and your intuition is spot on! You are about to get everything you wanted and then some so you can relax and know that your life is about to change for the better.

If you are looking for a personal reading, you can look on my shop on Etsy at PinkAmethystTarot, DM me or send me an e-mail at pinkamethysttarot@gmail.com

If you feel called to tip:

C@SH@PP: $oddlycozycottage

P@YP@L: @oddlycozycottage

KO-FI: @oddlycozycottage

Thank you all so much for interacting with me and my readings, it really does mean the world to me!

Page Divider by @cafekitsune

LEGAL DISCLAIMER: FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY. THESE READINGS ARE FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY. no guarantees are implied. These readings are not a substitute or replacement for any professional help or services. My readings are not a substitute for any form of professional legal, medical/psychiatric, relationship, religious/spiritual or financial/ business advice nor consultations. You should always see a professional legal/trained adviser for help in any matter. I am not responsible for any decisions/ actions you take.

[eringobragh420]

🖤 Pairing — Damian Priest ♥︎ f!Reader 🖤 Summary — Sequel to Hatefucking. Reader thinks she can bad-mouth Damian live on Raw and get away with it. She’s very wrong. 🖤 Word Count — 1.9k 🛑 Warnings — NSFW. Face-fucking, hatefuck (the characters do not like each other), degradation, cum 18+ 🖤 Taglist — In the comments. If you’d like to be added, please click here! 🖤 Requested By — @miss-kuki-nz. Hope you enjoy! 🖤 MASTERLIST, KINK LIST

“You know, Damian Priest and I used to be really … really close,” she purred into the microphone, glancing around the arena as the audience murmured. “But I had to end it not too long ago.” She shoved her bottom lip out, blinking, leaning on the top rope, feigning sadness. “Honestly, I just got so tired of saying just a second … I have to get the tweezers every time he took his pants off.” The crowd erupted, mostly in boos, and she simply giggled. “And then,” she continued dramatically, “after he finished—” Her eyes slid sideways to the camera in the corner of the ring. “—that is, if he finished …” More hatred from the crowd, and she shared a proud smile with Liv Morgan.

Damian’s music blasted through the arena and the titantron came to life, and she and Liv unknowingly reached for one another. Surely he wouldn’t come out and try to attack two small women, no matter how big their mouths were. He was probably coming out to try and save face, defend himself from the harsh words they both knew to be a huge lie. When Damian slowly appeared in the entranceway she and Liv had just come from, she thought for sure that’s what was about to happen.

Until he broke into an all-out sprint, and the women scrambled out of the ring, over the barrier and into the time keeper’s area. They turned briefly to see if Damian was following them, and with his long legs and speed, he was already nearly on them. The Judgment Day’s music hit, causing the big man to pause only briefly, but it was long enough for the girls to put a bit more distance between them and disappear into the backstage area. Liv suggested they split up, and the two of them headed down separate hallways in an effort to divide and conquer. The thorn in Damian’s side broke off to the left, into a darkened corridor, grinning wildly because even if he did catch her, what was he really going to do? Yell at her? Chokeslam her? She hadn’t forgotten about the hatefuck from a few weeks prior, certainly not—sometimes, even now, she could still feel the sensation of his thick cock painfully stretching her asshole—but this hallway was a very public place, more public than behind an unlocked door. If she just laid low here for a while, until most everyone had departed the arena for their flights or hotel rooms, Damian included, she should be able to sneak out unnoticed and, more importantly, unscathed.

That’s when she noticed it. The shift in the atmosphere, the rise in temperature only on the back half of her body, the unusual sensation of not only being watched, but that whomever was watching her was incredibly close. The sum of all these parts sent her sprinting for the hallway in front of her, but she didn’t get very far—a hand clamped over her mouth, an arm came around her midsection, and she was yanked back into the dark corridor. Her heart pounded and she kicked her legs, but she never once attempted to scream as Damian wrenched her back deeper into the darkness. Eventually he returned her to her feet, and she would proceed to ignore the disappointment she felt at the loss of his hard body against her as he spun her around to face him. She could hardly see anything with the lack of lighting down this particular hallway, but if she didn’t know it was Damian before, the familiar hand around her throat, forcing her into the nearest wall, made it crystal clear.

“I am so fuckin’ tired of your mouth,” he growled. One side of him was a shadow, but all of him was huge, imposing, formidable. 

Her heart threatened to crack her ribcage, thighs twitching, pussy throbbing. He could throttle her at any moment if he wanted, and she just bet he wanted, which slowly formed a wicked smile on her wet lips. “Aww, did I hurt your feelings?” she pouted. A tiny trickle of fear slipped down her spine as she remembered what he’d done to her ass, realizing he could do it again if he wanted to. It would be risky and it would hurt and she would hate him, but wasn’t that just exactly who they were? A little toxic, a dash of disdain, and a whole lot of sexual chemistry? “What are you gonna do about it?” It was a question only half of her wanted the answer to—the half that Damian Priest happened to own.

Damian said nothing, which was a hell of a lot more unnerving than when he was degrading her or splitting her holes open, and the hand on her throat forced her body down until she collapsed to her bare knees on the concrete floor. He released her neck to fist her hair, forcing her head back, as his other hand worked stealthily to unbuckle his belt and open his jeans. He pulled his still-hardening cock out without the barrier of underwear, and she smirked—he’d either been planning or hoping.

“What else do you do with a filthy mouth?” he asked, stroking his length directly over her face, and she could smell him, that sexy man musk she always smelled whenever her mouth was about to get pummeled. She bit her lip, forcing silence on a desperate moan threatening from her throat, because yes, of course, she wanted this, but she didn’t want anyone to catch her wanting it. “Fuck it until it apologizes,” Damian snarled, still fisting his solid cock, so close to her face now she could feel his fingers grazing her cheek, and she salivated at the now constant craving she had for Damian Priest, especially his big dick—the very one she’d just told millions of people was tiny. 

However, the mere thought of apologizing had her mouth falling open in what would have been raucous laughter if not for the cock that was instantly shoved inside where it didn’t stop until it poked the back of her throat. She gagged, hands coming up automatically, and Damian’s much larger hand smacked both of hers away, his other grip tightening on her hair. After a moment, he pulled almost completely out of her mouth, knowing better than to give her an opportunity to clench her teeth, and then he stuffed himself in the wet cavern again. A deep, vibrating moan came from above, but it was muffled by her coughing and gagging, and she worried she’d be the one to give them away. But fuck, she loved it. She hated the douchebag, egotistical little boy he acted like most of the time, but she’d be a dirty, rotten, filthy liar if she said she hated the way his body made her feel, how much she yearned for his cock in her mouth, even more so in her pussy, and it may have hurt for a week after, but she wanted him to take her ass again. Nobody could satisfy her the way Damian Priest did, and she would never, even upon threat of death, admit to this fact.

“These are the sounds you should be making,” Damian growled. He was pumping into her throat at a leisurely pace, but his length and girth quickly caused her jaw to ache, the corners of her mouth to burn, and the drool built up from the foreign intrusion began seeping down her chin. “Nobody wants to hear you talk,” Damian panted, “we all just wanna hear you gag on my cock.”

Sometimes it’s all she wanted to hear, too—again, a fact she would never share with anyone—but then he forced himself all the way down her throat, her nose bumping his crotch, and she lost the ability to breathe. It was hot until it seemed as though Damian wasn’t going to pull out, and he allowed her this time to slap at his thighs and claw at his jeans before he yanked his cock out of her mouth. She gulped and gasped for air, a dense bridge of spit and drool and precum stretching from the head of his dick to her tongue and lips.

“Fuck you, Priest,” she blubbered, trying to collect herself by steeling her knees to the concrete and wiping her chin with the sleeve of her shirt, and she could feel her own arousal dripping down her thighs

“Yeah, fuck me,” Damian mocked quietly, the wet sounds of him jerking his length echoing throughout the hallway. “Fuck you.” 

She opened her mouth to retort, her words forced back down her throat by Damian’s cock, and he had both hands tangled in her hair now, and he wasn’t even thrusting anymore—he controlled her head, pushing and pulling, using her mouth like it was a fleshlight that felt no pain and had no gag reflex. Her fingers were vices on his jeans and she felt one of her nails crack, but she wouldn’t speak the safe word. Never in a million, trillion years would she allow Damian Priest to break her, to allow him to believe that he was just too much for her, that she wasn’t able to handle him. So she let him have his way, neither encouraging nor discouraging as he fucked her face, gagging, coughing, sputtering when she had to, and gulping down as much oxygen as she could when he allowed it. At some point, her own fingers had snuck within her slick folds, flicking gently against her clit before her middle finger slipped inside her aching cunt.

“Fuck yes,” Damian groaned, “this is what they should be paying you for.” She smiled around his dick, a breathy laugh coming from her nose—she couldn’t argue with the logic; her head game was fire, and the evidence was currently obstructing her windpipe. “You like that idea, don’t you?” Damian chuckled darkly. “Well, I don’t have any cash on me, and I guess you don’t take credit cards.” He was jerking her head back and forth at an uncomfortable pace, though her fingers kept a similar velocity in her pussy. “So I’ll just have to pay you in cum, huh?”

She really didn’t want it any other way, and she added another digit inside her pussy. Her jaw screamed, her throat would be raw for days to come, her knees would likely be bruised, maybe scraped, and she was a little pissed about her nail, but she loved every minute of it. And once she was alone in her hotel room later, she would pull out her toys and think of this very moment. Damian mumbled and repeated obscenities above her, pulling her hair and squeezing her skull, and she was so close to cumming herself that a roar tore through her chest and neck, consequently vibrating down Damian’s cock. He cried out through tightly closed lips, his length buried to the root in her throat, her nose crushed against him, and she could feel him twitching, but she never tasted his cum.

“Straight down your fuckin’ throat,” Damian mumbled. She could feel the warmth of his cum as it fell down her esophagus, and it was the strangest thing to swallow something that was never in your mouth to begin with, and she still couldn’t breathe, and Damian was blissfully riding out his orgasm on her face, and it was finally her turn to topple over the edge, coating her hand in her own juices, body quivering. He pulled out and took a few steps back, and she collapsed onto all fours, coughing, spitting, still drooling a little. A filthy mess. After tucking himself away, Damian squatted down in front of her. “No more talking about my dick on live television,” he advised.

She snickered, sitting up on her knees again. “Why? I only like you when you’re angry.”

[daphwritesworld]

Would you write for player x player x reader???

If so could I request a Leah x Alessia x Reader fic?? I feel like they'd be the perfect combination of strict and soft, so interchangeable too!

Leah x Teammate!Reader x Alessia

content: Top!Leah, Bottom!Reader, Top!Alessia, overprotective!Leah, peacekeeper!Lessi, strap on use (R receiving), pussy eating (R & Alessia receiving), nipple play, squirting, overstimulation

warnings: talk of passing out & being unconscious, little bit of Leah semi shouting but only bc she’s worried about you, Reader pushing herself too hard

synopsis: You push yourself too hard your first game back on the pitch. It’s a good thing you’ve got two extra worried girlfriends to remind you to properly rest.

word count: 2.8k

!! 18+ NO MINORS !!

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━♥♠♥━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

They warned you. Told you to be careful and not to push yourself at your first game back…but did you listen? Absolutely not. Why would you listen to them? The two people who care about you most. Why listen to them when you’ve got a thick skull and an even thicker will to do whatever the fuck you want.

Sure they’re just looking out for you, but your need to prove yourself to everyone in this stadium is overwhelming. And the need to prove it to yourself is suffocating. Like a pair of invisible hands around your throat— squeezing and squeezing the life out of you until you go out there and score.

So that’s exactly what you do. You get put in the last half of the game, fire coursing through your veins as you run out on the pitch. Your brows are furrowed as you stay focused, you see Leah in the midfield shooting the ball, and next thing you know it it’s coming right at you. You let the adrenaline take over, your brain realizing you’re blocked in.

So without hesitation you do the only thing you can think of— you kick the ball towards the goal. You don’t even turn around, too scared to see your failure play out in front of you. But the boos never come, a wave of cheers erupts within the stands as your teammates surround you as they scream words of encouragement towards you.

Alessia and Leah are the last to leave you, giving you quick forehead kisses with whispered “Good job, darling!” & “So so proud of you, love!” before they run back out to their positions on the pitch. The energy pumping through your veins is enough to drown out the dull ache in your head. You’re fine! You’ve been cleared to play, and you’re starting back on restricted time. At least that’s what you keep telling yourself. That’s what you tell yourself as the seconds tick down, your foot making contact with the ball as your vision starts cutting in and out. You can hear the cheers from the crowd and then all you see and hear is black.

You come to in the med room. Each of your girlfriends on either side of you as you slowly blink open your eyes. You groan out as you get use to the new light source— two heads snapping up as you do so. “How are you feeling, love?” It comes out so soft and pillowy light.

“Like she fucking pushed herself too hard, that’s how she’s feeling!” A less sweet voice cuts through the air. You dart your eyes down at the tone, eyes filling up with tears as your teeth bite down into your bottom lip. You really don’t want to break down in here, praying you can at least make it to the car. “I-I’m really sorry. Can we please just g-get in the car..then you can yell me all you want. Okay? I..I’m sorry,” you’re picking at your fingers as you say it.

Your body language is so drawn into yourself— you know you messed up. You’re shutting down right in front of them as you retreat into your own body for comfort. Leah lets out a sigh, her anger dissipating as she leans down to bring your eyes up to meet her’s. “I’m sorry, too. I was way too harsh, my love. I know you just wanted to play good, and you did. You scored us two goals, and the winning one with only seconds to spare…” her voice trails off as her eyes get a little more serious. “But then I had to watch you go down— again. No, we did. Me and Alessia. We had to stand by on the sidelines and watch a bunch of doctors work on your unconscious body as they hooked you up and wheeled you away. We were terrified, darling.”

You look up to meet her eyes, tears filling up in hers mirroring yours as the weight of everything finally hits you. She pulls you into a hug as you both let it out. Crying into each other as she caresses your back. Alessia stands up to lean into the embrace. A hand on the back of Leah’s head and the other one runs up and down your arm. She’s trying to be strong for the both you— take the brunt of the emotional tax. She can calmly kisses your foreheads and tells you both it’s gonna be okay. One of you has to hold together, and right now that’s Less. Like the glue you always say she is, she bonds you three on that small little medical table. Held together by nothing but sheer love and adoration.

“Come on lovies, let’s go get in the car,” she says it so soft, to not disturb the comfortable silence you’re all bathing in. She tugs you both a little, urging you to hop down. You untangle your arms as Leah helps you hobble off the uncomfortable table. Alessia walks up behind you both, a hoodie of hers ready to be put over your head. You lift your arms as she slides it on, planting a kiss to your cheek as she fixes the hood for you. They both lead you out of the building and into the chilling night air of London.

Alessia gets in the back with you, letting you snuggle up to her as Leah climbs into the drivers seat. It’s a short ride to your flat, thankfully being a home game this time round. You don’t even notice that the car’s stopped moving. Not until Leah’s opening the backseat and Less is rubbing your back as she coaxes you out of your sleepy daze. “Come on, love. Gotta get inside so you can eat.”

You sigh before leaving her warmth, climbing out of the car as they once again surround you, on either side as the guide you into your shared home. They set you on the couch before Leah settles down with you, letting you climb into her lap as you get comfy. You know she won’t be cooking, letting Alessia do all the work as she focuses on keeping you awake. That’s always how it ends up…well usually a little more R-Rated, but you don’t except her to want you after pushing her and yourself like you did today. You lean your head up to rest on hers— forehead to forehead as you speak so softly you’re not sure if she can even hear you, “I am really sorry, baby. I hope you’re not still mad at me.”

She lets out a deep sigh before tapping a finger on your cheek, you direct your gaze to hers already knowing the telltale sign. “I’m not mad at you, love. But you will be getting punished after dinner. I’ve already discussed with Less. No if, ands, or buts. She agrees you deserve a little lesson on pushing yourself, too hard. You understand?”

A smile pulls at the corner of your lips as you giggle a bit at the realization. “Yes ma’am, I understand.”

“Don’t look so happy to get punished. What are we gonna do with you, darling?”

Dinner pasts smoothly, all of you eating as you finish a new episode of the show you’re watching together. You lay there for a while after you’ve all finished, bellies full and end credits rolling across the screen. You almost forget about your fate upstairs, that is until they’re both sharing a look before turning to you. Trapping you in a corner to the couch with only them to turn to. “I’m gonna do the dishes, and by the time i’m upstairs you better be listening to Less’s every word. Are we clear?”

“Yes ma’am. We’re clear,” you swallow between words. Fire running through your veins for a whole new meaning now.

She backs away from you as she collects the dishes on the coffee table before you. Alessia starts guiding you up to your shared bedroom where you know you’ll be pulled apart and put back together. When Leah’s harsh and by the book, Alessia is lenient and bending rules for you. But don’t be fooled— they can switch at the drop of a dime, too. They fill in whatever roll they need to, anything to balance out exactly what you need.

You’re being laid down into the bed before you know it, Alessia pulling away the articles of stained clothing that separates your body from her. She’s being so sweet and gentle, kissing your naked body as it’s gifted to her sight. You swear you could fall asleep like this. That is until your other girlfriend comes into the room, laugh light on her breath as she walks closer to the edge of the bed. It sinks down as she climbs forward on it, stalking her way towards you. Like a predator and its prey. You lie still as you watch her with wide eyes, body cowering as you think of all the things she could do to you.

“Spread your legs for me, sweetheart,” She licks her lips as she says it. A dark color overtaking her irises as she keeps looking at your exposed body.

You listen, spreading them as far as you can before her, presenting yourself to her fully. You know you’re dripping wet— you can feel it. You’ve been able to feel it ever since you sat on her lap before dinner. She groans out at the sight of you. Her fingers pulling your pussy lips apart as your face flushes at the way she’s studying your cunt. Like she and Alessia haven’t had you like this too many times to count— their little personal fuck doll.

Leah can’t hold herself back before she’s sinking her mouth down onto your clit, sucking on your bundle of nerves as Alessia starts playing with your nipples. Her mouth switching between them as her hands hold yours down onto the sheets. Can’t have your pesky little hands pushing them away because you’re too drunk off their touch. You swear you can feel every nerve in your body responding as it jerks around, pleasure wrecking in through waves. They’re toying with the your most intimate parts in ways you haven’t felt in weeks. You’ve missed there touch so much— craved it even.

Leah’s tongue moves down to your hole as her fingers come to rub on your clit, her eyes never leaving your face. She loves tasting you like this— when you’re so helpless. Pinned down and shaking like a leaf, spread out for both your girlfriends’ enjoyment. She’s being so messy tonight it’s making your head spin. She’s shaking her head with her tongue held out, pulling back and spitting on your clit, and just straight up making out with your pussy. At this point it’s all for Leah’s pleasure. She’s eating you like this because she wants to, and who are you to deny her? It doesn’t take long for that familiar burn to start brewing in your belly. A fire starting that you can’t put out. “I-I’m gonna cum!”

“Go ahead. No ones stopping you, love.”

You look up at her in disbelief, thighs clenching as you hold back your orgasm. There’s no way she’s letting you cum after today..right? Your eyes are bouncing around as your brain scrambles.

“Y/N. It’s okay. Don’t worry this is still a punishment, you’ll see,” Leah says it as she rubs little shapes into your clit. Kissing your inner thigh before shoving her tongue back inside you, tongue fucking you at a rhythm you didn’t even know was possible. You’d have to remember to pamper her later— you know her jaw must be about to fall down off after this. “Cum for us, love,” this time it comes from Alessia as her tongue starts circling around your nipple, her wet fingertips mimicking her tongue’s pattern as it goes around your other bud.

Your vision starts to get blurred and you clench your thighs around Leah’s head— an ungodly noise ripping from your chest as you cum on her face. Cum painting her nose and cheeks as she moans into the liquid gold leaking out of you. Alessia’s running her hands up and down your arms, leaving little kisses on your face as she tells you what a “Good Girl,” you’re being.

You go to open your mouth, but get cut off by a whimper leaving your mouth. Your hips go to jerk away, but Leah holds them down. Tsking at you as she shakes her head with a smirk. “I told her this was still a punishment, didn’t I, Less?”

“Mhm. You sure did, Le,” Alessia says while straddling your head. Her fingers never leaving your sensitive clit as she keeps rubbing into it. They both share a laugh as they look down at you between Lessi’s thighs, your big wide eyes staring back up at them. “Be a good girl and make Less cum, baby.” Then she’s sinking down onto you, silencing you as she starts grinding down onto your face.

You get lost in the task— moaning up into her as your hips grind against the air. You’re not sure where Leah went, but you’re not too worried at the moment. Which is unfortunate…because if you were listening close enough you would’ve heard the bedside drawer opening and closing, or maybe the unmistakable sound of Le sliding on her favorite harness. Maybe then you wouldn’t be bright red with embarrassment— hiding your face between Alessia’s thighs from the way you squirt on just the tip of Leah’s strap. Making a defining silence take over the room as both girls stop their ministrations. She’d barely got it in before the liquid shot out and sprayed both her, Alessia, and the sheets below them. A loud high pitched moan breaking out of your chest and into Less’s cunt that had her cumming early all over your face as well.

You’re about to say something— defend your busting early, but Leah beats you to it. With the way her hips pull back and then slam down into your slick heat, “Someone’s missed my cock, huh, darling?” she’s making out with Less as she says it. You can’t tell if she’s talking to you or your other girlfriend, but it doesn’t matter. You wouldn’t be able to respond anyways with the way your brain is turning to mush. Less is still sat on your face— pussy wetter than ever as your tongue keeps exploring her.

You don’t know if you’d wanna respond anyways..Leah gets so cocky when she has a fake dick tied around her waist. Her mouth can be deadly in the best of ways when she knows she’s making you feel good with it. She’s had you cumming in minutes when she runs her mouth, telling you how much your pussy loves her, “Ohh look darling, she’s practically begging. Crying out for me isn’t she?”

That’s what she says when you’re wet— that your pussy is crying out for her. She can be the nastiest of talkers when she wants to be, talking straight to your pussy as she leans down to finger fuck you open to take her cock. She’s even shushed you before, “Shhh, baby! I’m not talking to you. I’m talking to your pussy.”

But Less is always there to balance it out, with kisses to your furrowed brow until the wrinkles there are gone and your relaxing back into the pleasure. Leah may love to tease you, but Less always knows when to reassure at the right times. The yin to Leah’s yang.

Before you know it, you’re cuming around her again— Alessia’s fingers still rubbing tight circles into your clit as you squirm away from her touch. Leah’s grabbing your hips as she starts fucking you faster, a new found energy to render you boneless. “I told you this was a punishment, love. You wanted to push yourself on the pitch? That’s fine. We’re gonna push your record for most orgasms in a night. Aren’t we Less?”

“Mhm, you’ve got four more to go, darling! Almost there,” She hops off your face as she plants a kiss to your lips. Disappearing behind you as their words sink in. Your arms go to Leah’s shoulders as she changes angles a bit, throwing one of your legs up over her shoulder. You don’t even notice the bed dip back down, or the buzzing sound infiltrating the air now…but you definitely feel the vibrations on your red, puffy clit. Sending tears to your eyes as your legs start to shake, screams and pleads skipping from your kiss swollen lips as you cum once more. Then Alessia’s leaning down— licking up the tears from cheeks before she presses a button on the wand vibrator..sending it up into a faster setting. Your nights truly only just beginning. Lord be with you.

[crheativity]

Hello! I'm not sure if you're taking regular requests, but can I request hcs for the Malleus, Deuce, Epel, Ace, and Azul finding out that the reader has a crush on someone from their dorm but it isn't them? The reader actually has a crush on one of the NPCs, and that NPC requites the reader's feelings. How would they react?

It's ok if you don't want to do this also. No pressure

-💀💅

SUMMARY: They find out you have a crush on someone from their dorm… that isn’t them.

WARNINGS: Cut-off swear in Epel’s section, angst D:

NOTES: why must you do this to me. I love these boys sm. how could you do this.

(Also, sorry for the delay D:)

There’s a hole inside of him that can’t be plugged with your friendship anymore. Almost everyone knows something is up - everyone except you. Around you, nothing’s different. He’s the same happy, goofy guy he always is. But the minute you’re not around, the smile fades, the joy is gone. He has zero motivation to do anything. And yet, he’s gotta continue being your friend. You don’t have a whole lot of people here for you. He’ll hide himself until he’s numb if it gives you the support you need.

“…”

He’s calling his mother, in tears, as soon as he gets a moment to himself. He doesn’t know what to do - he’s never really dealt with love before. His mother, fortunately, knows just how to soothe him, and he begins to move forwards and onwards. He distances himself a little out of respect - at least, until it all goes away. He doesn’t want to make you uncomfortable - especially since he tends to wear his heart on his sleeves. As soon as he can act normal around you again, he will, but please give him the opportunity to move on first.

“Hey, mum? …what do I do?”

He hated himself. Of course it wasn’t him. Of course it was another Octavinelle student. What was he thinking?! It’s just like those kids would tell him - he was slow and chubby and stupid, and that’s not counting the overblot incident, why would someone like you even look at someone like him? Azul isn’t proud of it, but he finds himself looking for dirt on the student. He’s not gonna use it or anything, but he needs some kind of way to cope, and throwing himself into his work seems the best possible course of action. At least, until his silly hopes and dreams stay shoved in the trash can where they belong.

“…those kids were right.”

It’s because he looks like a girl, isn’t it? He KNEW talking to Vil and Rook about this kinda thing was a bad idea - look at where it got him! Now he’s gotta live with the fact that he’s always playin second fiddle with you. Makes sense though - who’d wanna date a girly boy like him? Although, maybe if he proved to you that he’s the better choice, you’d like him instead? Or, maybe he could fistfight that other prissy pomefiore kid. He’s honestly not sure what would help him feel better right now. He feels very uncertain - like the world is both shattering and strangely familiar at the same time.

“I’m gonna beat his a-“

He’s sulking. You’re in love with someone else and he’s sulking. What is he supposed to do now? It’s entirely unfair that you are his everything, his happiest dream, yet he’s barely in yours - at least, not in the way he wants to be. He’s avoiding you for a while, locking himself in his roomm. The rain seems endless, thunder and lightning acting as proof of his bad mood. Sage Island almost floods. Lilia and Silver respect his wishes for you to be around less but think he’s being a bit dramatic.

“Malleus? It’s been storming for weeks now. Can you come out of your room?”

♥Thank you for reading!! I hope you enjoyed it!!♥

[baileysturnz]

𓂸𝘣𝘧!𝘮𝘢𝘵𝘵 𝘹 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳!𝘨𝘧 𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘯𝘥 𝘢 𝘳𝘢𝘪𝘯𝘺 𝘧𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘢𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘯𝘰𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘰𝘨𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳❥

𝗐𝖺𝗋𝗇𝗂𝗇𝗀𝗌: 𝖥𝖫𝖴𝖥𝖥, 𝗄𝗂𝗌𝗌𝗂𝗇𝗀, 𝗉𝖾𝗍 𝗇𝖺𝗆𝖾𝗌 (𝖻𝖺𝖻𝗒, 𝗌𝗐𝖾𝖾𝗍𝗁𝖾𝖺𝗋𝗍, 𝗉𝗋𝖾𝗍𝗍𝗒 𝗀𝗂𝗋𝗅...), 𝗌𝗈𝖿𝗍!𝗆𝖺𝗍𝗍 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋!𝗀𝖿, 𝗎𝗌𝖾 𝗈𝖿 𝖸/𝖭, 𝗌𝗎𝗀𝗀𝖾𝗌𝗍𝗂𝗏𝖾 𝖼𝗈𝗆𝗆𝖾𝗇𝗍𝗌

𝖺/𝗇: 𝗉𝗋𝖾𝗍𝗍𝗒 𝗆𝗎𝖼𝗁 𝗃𝗎𝗌𝗍 𝖿𝗅𝗎𝖿𝖿! 𝗆𝗒 𝖿𝗂𝗋𝗌𝗍 𝖾𝗏𝖾𝗋 𝖻𝗅𝗎𝗋𝖻 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗂𝖿 𝗒𝖺𝗅𝗅 𝗐𝖺𝗇𝗍 𝗆𝖾 𝗍𝗈 𝗍𝖺𝗄𝖾 𝗈𝗎𝗍 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖸/𝖭 𝗂 𝗐𝗂𝗅𝗅 𝗋𝖾𝗉𝗅𝖺𝖼𝖾 𝗂𝗍 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝖺 𝗈𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗋 𝗇𝖺𝗆𝖾. english is not my first language

have a good read!

ꨄ𑁍シ

y/n and matt found themselves on a rainy day in y/n’s apartment. their limbs intertwined on y/n’s couch. they were watching a tv show, those old sitcoms from the 2000s.

“we should do something” matt suggested. y/n got up from her spot on matt’s chest. “what would you like?” she asked with bright eyes looking at matt. “well i know you’re pretty damn sure about what i wanna do”. matt teased with a grin. “matt!” y/n hits him in the arm.

matt sits up. “no but really what could we do?” Y/n asks. “bake something?” matt suggests. “yes! ive been wanting to bake some cinnamon rolls”. “yeah, lets do it sweetheart”.

matt and y/n got up from the couch and went into the kitchen. they gathered all the ingredients and y/n started putting all of the ingredients for the batter in a bowl.

“matt”. y/n says not looking away from the recipe. “can you get me some vanilla extract please?”. “ofcourse baby” matt says as he goes to search for it.

y/n is still stiring and reading the recipe while matt sneaks up behind her and puts his arms around her waist.

“hows that looking, pretty girl?”. he asks kissing her neck. “really delicious” “here”. y/n says as she puts flour on her finger and pokes matts nose. “hey!”. matt exclaims stepping away from her laughing. y/n giggles. “really funny right”. matt grabs a handfull of flour and throws it at her face. she gasps and laughs. “oh youre so done”. she grabs another handfull and chases him through the kitchen. matts stops her and kisses y/n

after a little while the y/n and matt finished the cinnamon rolls and put them in the oven.

“i think we need to have a little time in the bedroom”. matt suggested. “matt!” she giggled as he picked her up and placed on the counter. he placed a trail off kisses from her jawline to her neck and chest.

safe to say the cinnamons came out a little burnt..

ꨄ𑁍シ

a/n: OMFG my first fic! if yall have any request id be honored to do them and if you guys have feedback on my fic pls tell me. im kinda proud of how this turned out to be my first fic. thank you for 21 followers!

𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘦𝘯𝘴

𝖻𝖺𝗂𝗅𝖾𝗒 シ♥

[dolliedyhard]

🔪Jeff The Killer Headcanons🔪 [PART 1]

I think is about time I posted my headcanons for him! BOY I did not plan this post to be sooooooo long, I HAVE SO MUCH TO SAY OMGGG!!! I LUV HIM SO MUCH (  ੭꒦ິ꒳꒦ີ)੭ ᰔ. I might have to make this into a multiple part series on my blog. These are all hc’s for adult Jeff, I have completely different ones for when he was a teen and I’ll make one for teen Jeff later on. None of these hc’s involve his relationship with Dollie or other pastas, this is all about him. All of this is SFW. Enjoy <3

AU: Paracosm of the Vagabonds

‼️TW: mentions of self harm‼️

♥︎A/N: btw this is my first time making/posting hc’s so plz don’t jump me if they’re bad- (/ _ ; )

♥︎Appearance & Attributes♥︎

He’s 25 y/o

6’4

Straight

White American

Full name is Jeffery Woods. I’ve always liked his name the way it was so I’m not changing it.

Muscular and lean. He’s got more of a sleeper build tho.

Despite being lit of fire he managed to heal his hair, it’s healthy now.

He loves keeping his hair long. He’ll never CONSIDER cutting it short. His hair is one of his favorite parts of himself.

He for certain wants his hair to be down to his waist one day

Hair type is 1c

Jeff’s hair is naturally brown. When the “incident” happened the fire made his hair temporarily black. (Ik that’s not how real logic works but cmon let me have fun >:c)

After a few months his hair went back to brown

Now he dyes his hair black bc he prefers it that way.

His tattoos don’t mean anything, he just got them because he thought they were cool.

He smells like incense and ash most of the time.

If he decided to finally wash his clothes then he smells like clean laundry.

He doesn’t wear cologne, he’s never cared for it.

He showers like twice a week. For the rest of the week he just wipes himself down this a cloth.

At least he uses a soap cloth (oh thank GOD)

When “the incident” happened his face scars would constantly bleed and wouldn’t close.

It was really sensitive and if he smiled or laughed to hard it would gush out again.

It took multiple years for the wound to permanently close.

It’s completely healed now it’s just deformed skin

The scars on his body are from fights, him doing stupid shit or self harm.

He’s not hairy, some underarm hair but that’s all

His veins are most visible in his forearms and hands

I don’t have a voice claim for him (YET!) but his voice is pretty deep and it has a raspy sound to it

He has dark circles under his eye from staying up for days at end

He got some sharp ass canine teeth. In my AU he got bit by a vampire. He didn’t get turned into one bc the transformation was stopped right after his vamp fang came in.

Warm to the touch. Doesn’t matter what season it is, his body manages to retain a significant amount of body heat.

His skin is very pale due to lack of sunlight and frequent blood loss.

♥︎Personality♥︎

When meeting him for the first time he comes off as an asshole.

He insults everyone and it’s hard to hell if he’s joking or not.

And if he’s really pissed he’ll get REAL creative with the insults.

Swears like a sailor

He’s distant and off putting to people that aren’t in his circle.

He loves showing off and will do it no matter what. Even if the circumstances are dangerous.

Jeff loves stroking his ego, it’s so obnoxious but he could care less.

Lowkey thinks he better than everyone

LAWD he’s handsome and he knows it

Doesn’t care about ur personal space

Will creep up on u to whisper shit in ur ear to scare you. And other stuff like that.

Gives people the nastiest stares of all time. And I dare u too say something to him about it, he’ll square TF UP.

Says some really offensive shit but he doesn’t care if you get upset because of it.

And he’ll say it loud and proud no matter how much of a dumbass he looks like saying it.

Jeff’s one of the most defiant proxies in the mansion

He listens to NO ONE and hates more than anything to be bossed around.

Though he partially listens to Slenderman, yk, bc he has to so he can live in the mansion. Masky too bc he’s Slenderman’s right hand man.

Can’t laugh like a normal person to save his life

Like he’s literally out of breath, red face, everything

“How do I befriend him?!?” I hear you say

Like I said before he loves his ego being satisfied so u could just blow smoke up his ass.

But to him you’ll be more like a “fan” than a friend.

And he will just use you for his benefit. He’ll step all over u since you’ve shown ur willing to be submissive to him ＿|￣|○

Show him you’re not to be fucked with but not to be intimidated by.

For Jeff it’s more about if you guys get along and have a good time together than having the same interests.

Jeff only plays favorites if he has a crush on you

Oh boy is he one petty motherfucker… He holds grudges over anything with anyone and is very vengeful.

He’s quick to temper too. He’ll go into a rage induced episodes and they can last for days at a time.

That’s due to his IED (Intermittent Explosive Disorder) and just him being a fucked up person.

He also has BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder)

He’s not trying to manage his IED by being more laidback and comedic but that’s not really helping.

Not a big fan of animals. So if you were to ask him what is fav animal was he wouldn’t say any.

♥︎Interests♥︎

Wannabe lead guitarist

He’s not good enough to be the lead but his ego says otherwise.

He owns a sick ass guitar tho

Started out being emo in his early teens, now he’s more of a metal head.

(I don’t know much about nu-metal or any metal at ALL so I can’t rlly say who his favs are. SORRY IM AN EMO FUCK AT HEART OKAY???)

Listens to goth music occasionally too

Loves going to concerts no matter who’s performing

If you happen to bring up a band he’s seen live before he will 100% without fail say “I saw them live at _!” And will proceed to info dump about what went down.

Even worse if they were in their prime when he went.

Fashion wise he dresses alternative but it’s nothing fancy.

A band tee + hoodie or jacket, jeans, shoes (cons, or boots), for accessories belt and some spikes bracelets. That’s about it :v

And yes he does consider his piercings as accessories.

Paints his nails black on special occasions

Likes to collect weird stuff

His biggest collection is of knifes

Some of them are ornamental and some he actually uses to kill

He gets the money to fuel his collection off the dead bodies of his victims

Also has a strange fascination with history

Specifically historical torture methods & atrocities

Sometimes he uses the same torture methods he learned about on his victims.

HUGE HORROR NERD

He collects dvds of slasher & horror movies

And of course you can’t forget about the vintage TV to play them on!

He’s not a fan of snuff films or gore videos

It just takes out the art out of film making. Why should he watch uninspired shock gore for 0% satisfaction when he can go cause it for 100% satisfaction?

♥︎Killing♥︎

To Jeff killing is something he does for 3 things. Survival, satisfaction, and emotional regulation.

Once he’s got you in his grasp you won’t make it out alive.

Jeff commits the worst murders when he’s having a IED or BPD episode.

He’s not a kidnapper type serial killer

He likes to get the job done by the end of the day at the longest

He loves the taste of blood and often licks it off his knife

He thinks he can train himself to be able to taste the differences between blood types.

He just likes inflicting pain on complete strangers, it’s thrilling to him.

And it’s usually not a stab and go kill, when he first started out that’s how it was bc it was more for survival.

Now Jeff has the taste for blood. And he’s got some horrifyingly creative ways to extract it.

Nowadays you’ll be lucky if it’s a stab and go. His goal is to make sure u feel the agony, every. second. of. it.

He would never consider hurting someone close to him, that would severely fuck with him.

Since the murder of his family he has no one. So he cherishes the few people close to him a lot more than he used to.

He’s never had any regrets about any of the many murders he has committed.

The one and only time he’s ever felt bad about inflicting violence on someone is his older brother Liu.

♥︎Vices♥︎

Jeff is a regular smoker (hence why he smells like ash)

He’s able to blow different shapes out of smoke

Prefers cigarettes over anything else

Hates vapes tho, he think they make you look like a massive pussy.

He’ll flat out refuse to fw you if you whip out your fruity-tuti flavored e-stick when yall go on a smoke break.

Jeff’s not a big drinker

Drinking just ups his already high sex drive to the max and he acts like a complete idiot when he’s drunk. Then after all that his hangover is fucking hell.

At the most he’ll get a bit tipsy cause the boost in arousal makes sex tenfold better.

Jeff’s never done any hard drugs and doesn’t care to.

Who needs a drug addiction when you have a murder addiction?

Okay so about the self harm earlier…

♥︎A/N: Btw in my au Jeff had a much shitter life than the og Jeffery Woods so all of this with context makes sense.

Jeff doesn’t s/h anymore but did it heavily in his teens before he went crazy.

His life was genuinely a miserable hellscape that was picking at his sanity and at every turn it only got worse.

His mother and father didn’t care about him at all. The only person that actually cared and loved Jeff was Liu. But Liu rarely showed any affection towards Jeff so it didn’t really matter how Liu felt about him.

No one knew what Jeff was doing to himself up until he ended up in the hospital with the gashes on his cheeks.

You have reached the end. TYSM FOR READING!!!

I hope you enjoyed reading my headcanons, and I will be doing more hc’s in the future for other creepypastas.

Stay frosty❄️ BAIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!

[ya-zz]

Can I request some headcanons with Cassidy, Hanzo and Reaper? Of them holding their newborn baby for the first time? The baby fever is going crazy feral for me rn

I thought I would've gotten to this sooner, but hello, it is finally here!

This was such a cute concept and I'm really glad I got to do this and to finish it! Thank you for the patience ♥

CASSIDY

He panicked when you mentioned you were going into labour, words fumbling out his mouth in incoherent sentences that made you question whether or not he was okay.

He was there with you the entire time you were giving birth, holding your hand, moving the stuck hair from your face, wiping the sweat off of your forehead.

He never once let go of you, wanting nothing more than to soothe you throughout the entire process. 

When the moment arrived, a screaming and crying baby in the nurses hands, Cassidy immediately felt the relief run through him. 

“I am proud of you, honey.” 

“You’re okay. Everything is fine.” 

When the nurses eventually handed the small infant over to you, he witnessed your features getting soft, tears pricking your eyes once more. They weren’t painful tears, but rather tears of love. 

The baby continued to cry for a minute or two longer as the conversation around the room continued.

Cassidy sat on the edge of the bed, hand still holding yours, watching you as you admired the soft bundle in your arms

When you turned to him with a smile on your face and asked if he wanted to hold his child, his heart almost stopped. 

He had felt overwhelmed before, but this time it felt different. 

His child was in his arms, bundled up in a soft blanket.

The cries had stopped, soft noises being made and when their eyes opened, looking at the cowboy, Cassidy felt the entire room spin. 

Finally, another reason to fall in love all over again.

HANZO

Hanzo was careful throughout every stage of the pregnancy. He’d listen to you, and get you everything and anything had wanted and needed. 

The moment Hanzo saw you grimace in pain, he knew exactly what was coming.

He was quick on his feet to get you over to medbay, hand never leaving yours as he helped you settle onto the bed.

The entire time he would whisper to you, sweet little words and praises to flood your mind and to take it off of the pain you were experiencing. 

“Stay calm, sweetheart.”

“My love… You are doing amazingly.”

He would keep his fingers laced with yours all throughout the birth of your child. 

The moment that new life was brought into the world, your hand squeezed your partners hand tightly, the relief flooding through your body.

His heart fluttered as the nurses brought the newborn over to you and him. 

Every emotion was heightened when he saw you hold the small bundle and when you offered for him to hold the baby, his eyes widened. 

His hands were gentle as he took the bundle to his chest, gently rocking his arms. 

He was almost a natural, and when the cries calmed down, he chuckled. 

Hanzo saw the pride within your face as you turned to look at him. The love for you and his child was overflowing.

The archer had another reason to keep fighting. To keep living.

REAPER

Everything changed rather quickly the moment you became pregnant.

The cold demeanour was suddenly calm and caring, something of which was what you needed during the pregnancy. 

When labour came around and pain was surging, Reyes moved fast, carrying you to the medbay.

He was worried and rightly so as you cried out in pain. 

Reyes kept his hand on your forehead, soothing what pained emotions you were receiving and letting out. 

Your body was on fire for your partner did what he could to make sure you were pain-free as possible.

“Stay calm, You’re doing good.”

“Almost there, don’t worry, you’re doing well.”

He listened to your cries and it pained him, but the moment that it fell silent and another cry was heard, Reyes felt warm.

His heart felt bigger as he watched you hold your newborn baby.

Tears spilled from your eyes, Reyes moved his hand to cup your cheek, thumb caressing the warm and damp flesh.

When you held out your newborn to your partner, he hesitated, but his arms opened up and accepted the small bundle of newborn joy.

His eyes softened and he smiled, a genuine smile that made your own heart flutter with joy. 

Reyes was happy. He was in love. 

[coichii]

CLEATS ✭

—(🎧)—> you’re a professional soccer player, going on for what feels like the biggest game of your life. so what happens when a girl “slips” and practically fucks up your whole season while your finance calms you?

pairing - fiancé!hyunjin ♥︎ professional soccer player!fem!reader

genre: injuryfic, angst, fluff, and comfort

word count: 2.0k

warnings: cursing

A/N: i really like how this story ended up, so please let me know what you think !! also I’ve never played soccer a day in my life…so

You can hear the cheers and roars of the crowd outside, giving you that feeling you’ve had since the first time you stepped on that field.

Undeniable excitement.

It was the first playoff game of the season, multiple championship titles were on the line. As one of the key players of your team, the pressure was on to give the best performances ever.

The feeling made your heart soar with pride, but also made your body tremble in fear. The thought of letting the ball slip right past your feet, or aiming right where the goalkeeper can block it, had you sweating bullets.

However, the game had to go on no matter what. So with a shaky breath, you were stepping out onto the field with the rest of your team, the cheers getting astronomically louder.

You’re face to face with the opposing team now, a rival team at that. They had practically kicked your ass last year. 2-6. It was embarrassing. You hadn’t cried that much over a game ever.

Your boyfriend, now fiancé, Hyunjin, practically had to bring you back to life. All the hate from your “fans” and media got to you bad, and he was scared. He had never seen you like that before. So vulnerable. So broken. You never wanted him to see you like that again.

So you silently vowed to not let that happen ever again as your captain called heads for the coin toss. The referee called out her choice and threw the coin up, the arena was silent.

“Heads! Home team gets the ball.” The referee announces, and the crowd goes wild. Your heart beat relaxes back to normal as you take position on the field.

Focus y/n. Focus. Focus. Foc-

A sharp whistle cuts through your head as the ball is kicked onto the field. Your head is completely locked into the game. Every movement feels dynamic and calculated. You feel as if you can see everyone’s moves clearly, and it feels good.

Block. Run. Run. Pass. Block. It all feels so clear.

Now it’s halftime, and you couldn’t be more excited than you were right now.

The score was 3-1, your team. You were drenched in sticky sweat, but you couldn’t care less. You wanted payback for what happened last year, and you were going to get it no mater what.

During the fifteen minute break, which you swear goes by way faster than it sounds, you receive a text from your fiancé with a small “ding!”

—

new message from “Hyune!💍”

Hyune!💍: I’m watching right now.

Hyune!💍: You’re doing so good, my love.

Hyune!💍: I’m so proud of you.

You: Thank you so much baby!

You: I thought it would be really hard to face them, yk, after what happened last time

You: But the fans have been very supportive!!! And so have you.

Hyune!💍: Everybody loves you baby, told you so.

Hyune!💍: I’m sorry but I won’t be able to watch the rest of the game :( I’m super busy! But I’ll text you right after.

You: Ok :) it’s fine. They’re calling us back on. Ttyl!

Hyune!💍: Love you, ttyl <3

—

The conversation makes you smile, but that can only last for so long. You need to get back in the game as you step back onto the field.

This time, you’re able to admire the the stands filled to the brim with fans. Team colors flying everywhere, some fans even adorning a jersey with the same number you wore. That always made you feel warm and fuzzy inside, so you wish you could think about it longer.

But another whistle blows through your mind, and it’s the same situation as before.

Block. Run. Run. Pass. Blo-

All of a sudden, the silhouette of a player on the opposing team is coming out of nowhere. They ran into you clean, not even looking at where they were going.

You’re knocked back far, hearing the distant oohs and ahhs of the crowd in the background, but you couldn’t care less. You couldn’t even focus on it, because all you could focus on is the splitting pain coming from your knee.

The pain is so heavy it makes your head reel. Flags go flying in the distance, or atleast you think they do; your sight is dizzy and blurred from when you hit your head on the hard, artificial grass, so you can’t really tell.

Immediately, your teamates are rushing over to you as they scream and call for the coach and medical team to come check on you, concern inadvertently evident on their face.

“Y/n! Are you okay? That was a really bad hit.” Your captains voice cuts through the ringing in your ears. “Y/n?”

“No. No I’m not. My knee hurts so fucking bad.” You weep as tears spring to your eyes.

No, don’t cry y/n. You don’t want the media to react the way they did last time, do you?

The medical team made its way over to you by now as the crowds surprise quickly dies down to hushed whispers.

They examine rather quick that you can’t finish the rest of the game, or even walk for that matter. They lift you onto the stretcher swiftly and precisely, but it still hurts like a bitch.

You’re transported to the hospital soon after that, teammates wishing you their goodbyes as you’re carted away. To say you feel pathetic would be an understatement. You feel terrible, guilty, and embarrassed all at the same time.

◂—♥︎—▸

“Well Ms. Y/N, you’ve seem to have torn your achilles. It’s safe to say you won’t be playing anymore games for the rest of the season.“ The doctor announces flatly, as if it was the easiest thing ever. But to you, it was completely different. It was earth shattering.

You sat there in silence as even more tears cascaded down your cheeks, the doctor muttering a small, useless sorry as he walked out.

I’m so dumb. How did I not see them? Now my seasons over. I let my whole damn team down. I should just-

“Y/N! Oh my god y/n. I saw what happened on tv and I came running. Are you okay? What hurts? What can I d-” He rambles, stopping when your tears come into his view.

“Oh baby.” He pouts as he envelopes you in a tight hug, and the tears fall even harder than they had been.

Your tears soak his hoodie, but he couldn’t care less. He just wants to comfort you, and he’ll do what he has to do to make that happen.

“I-I’m sorry. I let you down. I let my whole fucking t-team down.” You sob, pushing your head impossibly farther into the crook of his neck.

“Shhh. No you didn’t, angel. You could never ever let me down. I’m so proud of you. More than you’ll ever know. And I’m sure your team understands, it could’ve happened to anyone, baby.” He consoles, and it’s working a little bit. Your breath is evening out slowly but surely, and tears are still flowing down your eyes, just not as aggressively.

“I tore my achilles, Hyune. My whole seasons over. All because I made a dumb mistake. I wasn’t paying attention, and now I’m gone. I’m so usele-“ But he’s cutting you off.

“Y/N, baby, you are no where near useless, you hear me? I’m so so sorry you tore your achilles, love. I know that must be so painful. But don’t you dare blame yourself. That girl fouled you, and she was thrown off for the rest of the game too. You can’t blame yourself for something that absolutely wasn’t your fault.” His voice sounding a little more angry at the thought of someone fouling you. “You were fouled, angel. That isn’t and will never be your fault.”

You allow his words to soak in, coating the insecurities swirl in through your mind with a warmth that could never be matched.

The door creaking open interrupts the moment, a random doctor you hadn’t seen before and your team’s health advisor walking through.

“Y/N, we’re going to have to perform surgery soon to make sure the injury heals well.” Your advisor says, and your heart drops.

“S-surgery? I didn’t know I would have to get surgery.” You stutter, and Hyunjin can practically feel the fear coursing through your veins.

“The surgery isn’t very invasive, don’t worry. It shouldn’t take more than two and a half hours and you’ll be unconscious. If it goes smoothly, we should have you out here by today.” The doctor reassures. Her words bringing you some since of comfort, but you’re not all that convinced.

“Don’t worry baby, I’ll be here for you when you get out of surgery and I’ll take care of you well. You’ll be fine, I promise you.” He kisses your hand as he says this, knowing how it makes you feel fuzzy inside.

“Ok. I’ll do it.”

◂—♥︎—▸

You feel dizzy as you slowly wake up from your drug induced daze. The surgery had gone smoothly and just as he had promised, he was still waiting there for you in the hospital despite his hefty work schedule.

“Welcome back, angel.” He whispers gently, kissing you right between your temples. You look over at him, your vision still a little blurry as he calmly strokes your cheek, warm hands bringing you comfort.

“Mhm. Can we leave the hospital now?” You ask. In the back of your mind, you’re wondering if your team won, but that’s pushed back even farther as Hyunjin’s strong arms envelop you in a tight hug. He always knows just what to do keep you with him.

“Yeah, there’s just a little paperwork to fill out and we’ll be out of here.” And you hum in response. “Oh yeah, your health advisor said you would need to be completely off of your leg for a while, so I took a week off of work to help you.”

“What?!” You exclaim. “A whole week? Hyune, are you sure? I don’t want to distract you from your work. I know your schedules are so busy baby, and you’re missing some recordings too.”

“Shh. Don’t worry, it’s already taken care of so there’s no point in worrying about it. Plus, I want to take care of you, what kind of future husband would I be if I didn’t.” He assures, cracking a smile.

“Are you sure? It’s really ok.” You tremble, but it’s almost fabricated worry. You want him to take care of you; it feels really nice when he does.

“I’m positive. Cmon, let’s go baby.”

◂—♥︎—▸

“I think I can ice my own knee, Hyune.” You giggle at the way he’s laser focused on making sure he’s applying the proper amount of pressure.

It’s been three days since the match occurred. Your team still won, thank god, and your teammates came to visit you after the match had ended.

The media was still as cruel and heartless as it always was. You couldn’t even count how many times you were called dramatic by various 12 year old boys who had never even stepped foot on a soccer field before, but it didn’t matter as much to you as it usually does. You have Hyunjin with you, so how could it ever?

“Nonsense baby, this is my job now.” He winks at you, stifling a smile to keep the joke alive, but he’s doing a horrible job.

“Jokes aside, thank you so much for these past few days Hyune. You have no idea how much it means to me.” You watch as his gaze softens at your admission. He smiles gently at you as he lets go of the bundle of ice and grabs your hands in his.

“Stop thanking me, angel. It’s what I’m here for. When I say those vows, I’m going to mean every word of it, and I’m going to prove it.

And he does.

He proves that through thick and thin, through sickness and health, he will always be there for you.

No matter what.

back to masterlist

[magics-neptunes-things]

Kiss Me More

Hi guys :)

I had a request for the last chapter for the serie "Kiss Me", so here it is :)

I hope it will suits you, dear anon.

Enjoy ♥

TW : Mention of cheating

PART 1 | PART 2

______________________________________________________________

Being Katie McCabe’s girlfriend is something you were hoping to be for several weeks before it happens. You both needed a little of adjustment at first, Katie was sometimes a little bit reluctant to pass to much time with you. You were hurt at first, thinking that she finally wasn’t interested to the idea of making things with you. When she realized that she hurt you, you had an explanation, where she basically told you that she didn’t want things to go to fast. Because a part of her was always scared of something going wrong or something.

You were great now, she isn’t the most demonstrative person in the world, at least when you are not alone. You can live with that actually, both of you decided to hide your relationship to the public for now. Not all of your teammates know about your relationship, but the ones who are your friends know.

Katie makes a point to let you understand that she is in charge in this relationship, but as bossy as she wants to be, you can only see how much she looks for you. When you are not coming to work together, she always waits for you in the locker room to have her kiss before going to training. When you are eating with other of your teammates at the training facilities, she always sneaks her chocolate to you. And you can say that she remembers everything you tell her.

Your favorite chocolate, your favorite flower, your favorite color, the name of the cat you had when you were a kid, where you like to go for a walk, your favorite TV show… She knows everything and she is always proud about it.

That’s the kind of things that makes you realize that she really cares about you.

********

“Do you really need to go?” you ask in a pouting tone, wrapped around your girlfriend.

Katie needs to go, you know that. She has to go to Ireland for the national break. You stay in London yourself, your ankle being a little sore and Australia only playing friendly, both of your teams decide to let you rest. You’re a little sad not to go have fun with Caitlin, Steph and Kyra, but you will next time.

“Yes, I have to. But I still could take you in my pocket” she smirks.

“I think I’d like that” you smile back.

Katie laughs and you cuddle even more against her, trying to get as much from your girlfriend as possible. It’s only two weeks, but you don’t like when she’s not around. She seems a little less needy than you are, but she never said anything about your behavior with her. Katie being very honest, you know that she would have said something if she didn’t like something you do.

You feel her shiver when you take a big breath in her neck and you smile, letting your finger run on the skin of her abs. But she knows what you’re doing, because several seconds after, she takes your hand in hers.

“We don’t have time for that, my pretty lady.”

“Can’t make it quick?” you tease.

“Not with you.”

She kisses you and you let her, distractedly asking yourself if it’s a compliment or not. But you soon come back to reality, Katie will leave in some minutes now. You’re at her house, you’ve got her cat’s supervision while she’s away. Ella, her sister, has too but she will rejoin her for the game in Ireland in some days.

You will not, because it would be too risky to do it. People would easily understand what’s happening if you go to the game. And with the social media, it would be impossible to hide. You know it. You’re still a little sad, but you don’t say anything to Katie about it.

She seems a little sad when she says goodbye to you at her door. The way she puts your hair behind your ear before kissing you softly say it all. You don’t need Katie to words what she’s feeling because you can feel it too.

“Write me?” you ask when she takes you against her one more time.

“Course. You too, ok?”

You nod, not trusting your voice at this moment. You hide your face on her neck one last time, breathing her sent. But you know you have to let her go; her Uber won’t wait for her forever.

After a last-minute recommendation about Coopurr, she kisses you a last time before running to the car with her suitcase. You can’t help but smile, waving back at her when she does from the back seat.

********

Katie lost her first game against France and in your opinion, it wasn’t really deserved. Maybe you are biased, but Katie would have deserved to score the goal at the 86th minute. She’s still fuming about her teammates fail and you try to distract her while showing her cat.

It’s seems to work, Coopurr’s purring making her smile. Ella left this morning, and you feel a little lonely here. Thanks god, Lia is in London too and you have someone you like to pass time with you. She is dog-sitting one of the dogs of your teammates and you wonder how it would look like when some of them would have children too.

You were actually walking Calvin with Lia, when you receive a message from one of your friends. You don’t really like when someone send you a “Have you seen that?!” with an article. You were not walking fast because of Lia’s leg, so you don’t have to slow to read it. Maybe sitting on a bench would have been a clever idea though.

You are currently reading an article of a girl, explaining how she slept with Katie McCabe. Your girlfriend. You know that Katie had some hookup before things are getting different between you, but the timing isn’t good. Katie and you are together for four months now. And this girl is literally talking about last week, exactly the day when Katie and her teammates went to a bar to decompress from the training. When you said to Katie that you find it strange, she laughs and answered “Meh we are Irish. Beer is in our DNA.” Which made you laugh at the time, but you are far from laughing right now.

“What’s going on?”

You realize that Lia called your name almost two times before you raise your face to look at her. Not being able to talk, you just give her your phone. You watch closely at her face when she reads it, and you see her passing from questioning to shock. She looks at you straight in the eyes when she gives you your phone back.

“Do you think that’s true?”

There is a lump in your throat that keeps you from talking right. You try to swallow it before talking.

“There are a lot of details.”

Lia nods. There are a lot of details. About Katie and her flat in Dublin, the same one where Ella was living before coming to London too.

“Come on, let’s go home. You need to call Katie.”

********

You did not call Katie, but you didn’t answer her messages or her call either. You know it’s stupid and maybe a little immature. But you cannot face it now. The betrayal is too hard to support, and you cried so much that you are not sure that your eyes will be white again one day.

You still take care of Coopurr though, the cat not leaving your side when you are at Katie’s house. You know she can see you coming if she wants, she installed security cameras outside and inside the house. Other than that, you just go to your flat to sleep the most that you can. You do not want to face this, maybe if you keep hiding the pain will fade away.

It doesn’t. You are startled awake two days after, with loud banging against your door. You hesitate to go answering, but you are clearly in fear that the person will break your door if you don’t get up.

So, you do, trying to arrange your hair in a messy bun. You are wearing Katie’s Irish away jumper and a pair of black Nike shorts. You’re pathetic. But Lia seems to be more relieved than judgy about your appearance when she sees you. She has her phone in her hand, but the relieved soon let place to a frown.

“What are you doing?” she asks.

“Sleeping?”

She grunts and close the door behind her when she comes in your flat. Thanks god you cleaned last night, tired to be in a messy place.

“Why aren’t you answering to Katie?”

“I can’t” you whisper, following her in the living room.

Lia turns around to look at you and her face softens when she sees you. She hesitates several seconds, before handing you her phone.

“Well, do it now.”

You look at the screen to realize that she was already calling someone for almost 45 minutes already. It’s Katie. Lia encourages you to take it with another nod of her head. You sigh and take it, letting yourself fall in the couch behind you.

“Hello?” you mumble.

“Bloody hell, where were you?!”

You wince at Katie’s tone, Lia taping your shoulder in an attempt of recomfort before leaving for the kitchen. You appreciate the intimacy she offers you, but you would have preferred to have her with you to be honest.

“Why aren’t you answering to any of my text or call? What happened?”

Katie seems on verge of breaking down and that’s maybe what made you snap. You don’t shout with Katie; you know that it doesn’t make any sense to do it with her. She’s loud, but you were always able to talk about things without shouting.

“I don’t know, you tell me?” you say icily.

“I don’t understand.”

You can easily imagine her with her eyebrows frown. You sigh before rolling your eyes. If she wants proof, you’re going to give some to her.

“I’ll send you something. After that, if you have something more to tell me, call me back.”

You don’t wait for her answer before hanging up. You take your phone, looking for the article your friend sent you. You didn’t answer to him, but right now, it doesn’t matter. You sent the link to Katie, before going to the kitchen to give Lia her phone back.

“Do you want me to stay, or can I leave?” the Swiss captain asks.

“You can go, Wally. Thanks for coming.”

“Anytime. Call me, ok?”

You smile slightly and nod, letting her kiss your cheek before she leaves. You just have closed the door behind her when your phone start ringing. It’s Katie, requiring a FaceTime. You answer and Katie’s face is almost white when you see her.

“This is bullshit. I never did that, I swear.”

You sigh, rubbing your forehead. You are honestly so tired, the amount of sleep you had those past hours are not very good. And sad, of course.

“I don’t know, Katie” you whisper.

“No, it’s the truth! You have to believe me, baby please.”

“How can she know all of these things, Kat?” you say wearily. “She even knows that you have a birthmark on your tummy, or how your kitchen is decorated.”

“Ella always made TikTok in that flat before she comes to London! And for my birthmark, it probably visible on some pictures. You know that I give my jersey to kids sometimes after the game. People take me on picture every time.”

You let several seconds passed, trying to listen to her. The last part is true, you saw thousand pictures of your girlfriend in sport bra on the football fields. For the second part you don’t see her making things like this, particularly with the fact that you just have to go on TikTok to see if it’s the truth or not.

“Come on Babe, why in the world would I ask you out if it’s just for sleeping around soon after?”

“I don’t know.”

You are desperate. You want to believe her, of course you do. You know she has sometimes trouble with talking about her feelings, but you never thought about her cheating on you. She’s one of the most loyal persons you know.

“You know what? I’m taking a plane right now.”

“What?”

Katie is suddenly moving, and the noise of a suitcase that is open is audible from the phone.

“No Katie, you can’t do that. You have training tomorrow and a game in two days against England.”

“I don’t give a damn fuck.”

You almost roll your eyes.

“Katie, stop.”

She listens and look at you, her face dark and her eyebrow frown. She looks determined but she still stopped when you asked her.

“You can’t do that” you repeat.

“Well come to Ireland. I’ll sent you the ticket for the plane.”

“Katie…”

“Stop calling me that!” she shouts.

“Calling you what?” you ask, frowning.

“Katie.”

She says it like it’s a bad world or something and this time you can’t help but roll your eyes at her.

“It’s your name?” you point.

“You stopped calling me that after we start dating. Stop calling me Katie and come to Dublin. Please.”

********

That’s how you find yourself in a plane for Dublin, reserved by Katie who put you in first class. You roll your eyes when you realize it and sent her a picture of you in your seat when you are in the plane. Since your call, Katie almost never stops calling or texting you. You don’t understand how she managed to get the time to go to training, but she does. And the pictures of her on Instagram can say you that it’s the truth.

She warned you that she won’t be able to come to pick you at the airport, but you are surprised to see a man with your name on a paper waiting for you. He smiles at you, informing you that Katie sent him to drive you to her hotel.

He talks to you about Dublin and some places during the journey to the hotel, while you are looking by the window. You never went to Ireland before, only for football. Maybe Katie will show you around if you manage to forget your fight. And you definitively need to change the idea you made in your head that Katie really cheated on you.

You know that some of your friends saw the article too, but no one talked about it to you. Maybe because you were ignoring everyone, true.

When you arrive, you hide behind your hood because you don’t want anyone to recognize you for now. You’re really fearing to find yourself facing Ruesha, for example. Katie told you her room number and your hands are shaking when you knock on the door of her hotel room.

It took her several seconds to respond, but she finally opens the door. She looks tired honestly, but she’s at camp so it’s maybe not surprising. She froze a little when she sees you, like if she doesn’t believe that you will actually come. You’re the one breaking the silence, rather awkwardly to be honest.

“Hi” you whisper, waving your hand.

Thanks god, Katie doesn’t seem to mind. She doesn’t laugh, taking you against her. Hard.

“You’re here” she whispers while holding you.

You nod, finding solace in her embrace. You missed her, obviously. It would have felt better to find her without all this drama though. She lets you go only several minutes after, not only releasing you totally. She looks at you and you look back, both of you not knowing where to start.

“I’m sorry for the article” Katie finally says after some time.

You shrug, not knowing what you could answer to that. She doesn’t ask for it, cheating or not cheating.

“Do you believe me now?”

You know that the answer to the question is important for her. Like you said, Katie’s loyal. And it’s one of the things who are the most important for her. You know it, you know Katie.

“I think I do” you finally say very slowly.

You see that Katie is looking at your face and your eyes with attention, maybe looking for any trace of doubt from your part. You believe her, that doesn’t mean that the article was forgotten. The way you felt when you first read it is still very perennial in you.

“Yeah?” she asks softly.

You nod, smiling very lightly when she strokes your cheek. She gives you the impression that you are made of glass, and you don’t know if she ever been so delicate with you.

“Come sit down.”

She takes you by the hand and you let her drag you in her bed. You sit here, next to her, with your back against the headboard. Katie sits in front of you, playing with her thumb and her nails.

“I’m going to talk, but if you have something to say please feel free to stop me, ok?” Katie asks.

You nod, looking at her. You are curious to know what she might want to tell you. Does she even know that girl? Or did that girl create all this story?

“I know that I’m maybe not the perfect girlfriend and I know that our relationship didn’t really start like it was supposed to. I’ll always had a thing for you, but I was scared, I was an asshole, and it was honestly easier for me to just sleep with you and try to pass to something else. That’s what I tried to do, but it didn’t work. I was still thinking about you, even more than before.”

Katie stops to take a breath and you are still looking at her, not saying a word for now. You don’t know if Katie thought about what to say to you, but for now you understand what she’s saying.

“I never slept with someone else since our first time, I couldn’t even if I tried and that scared the shit out of me. It was so hard to deal with the breakup with Ruesha, not because I was still in love with her, but because it was so shit, you know? I really don’t want to have to deal with that once again.”

You nod slowly, still not talking. This point makes you a little uneasy to be honest. You knew that Katie’s ex will be here to the camp. And you don’t know how the hell are all the people doing, because it was hard for you to be ok with the fact that Ruesha was seeing Katie every day and not you.

“But then there was this damn girl hitting on you right in front of me and I couldn’t support it. I was only thinking that you were mine, but you weren’t. And at that point I didn’t know if you wanted to be mine or if my behavior ruined everything we could have. But you give me a chance, and I’ll be forever grateful for it. That’s why I will never do anything and take the risk to lose you, Y/N. I really care for you and you mean more to me than you think.”

Katie never talked to you about her feelings the way she is doing now. You are touched, of course. You were in love with her before you slept together for the first time, not thinking a second that she might be interested in you too. She seems so vulnerable now, her voice shaking a little at the end. Maybe it’s the emotions, maybe it’s because how much she talked. Maybe both.

You softly take her hand in yours, interlocking your fingers together.

“I really care about you too. That’s why this… things was so hard to read. I don’t understand why someone would invented something like that.”

“I dunno. For celebrity maybe”

Katie shrugs, not really having interest in that for now. All that mattered to her right now is being sure that you trust her. That you believe her and she didn’t lose you.

“Are we good?” she asks, searching for your eyes.

“You promise that nothing happened?”

“I swear on Coopurr’s head, babygirl.”

“Ok” you laugh, rolling your eyes.

You can’t hide the fact that this is the first time that you laugh since you red this article on the park with Lia.

“Hug?”

Katie opens her arms with a slight smile and you don’t hesitate once second before going for her. Your movement make you both fall in the bed and you smile when you hear Katie’s laugh. You missed it. You missed her.

“God I missed you” Katie mumbles from under you, reading in your mind.

“I missed you too” you say honestly, letting your head rest against her shoulder.

She just hums, stroking your back softly while steering at the ceiling. You feel yourself dozen, you haven’t really had a good sleep those last days. But soon there is knock against Katie’s door and you jump.

“McCabe, diner!”

Katie sighs softly and release you to sit on the bed.

“Is it now that I leave?” you asks, not able to hide your disappointment.

“If you want to. Otherwise, you can wait for me here, I’ll sneak something for you to eat and we can sleep together. Tomorrow morning I’ll make my sister come to get you and you can come to the game?”

“Won’t people ask what the hell I am doing here?” you arch an eyebrow.

“That’s not their business. Unless it disturbs you.”

“It doesn’t”

“So it’s settled then” Katie shrugs, getting up from the bed.

She kisses you one more time before leaving and you decide to take the time to shower. You fall asleep while waiting for her, only taking the time to eat the sandwich and snacks she takes with her in the room before falling asleep again. You slept better in her arms than you did since like forever.

And the next day, when Ella came to take you to Katie’s flat at Dublin, you are feeling good again. Katie didn’t cheat on you.

Ireland didn’t win against England, but you are prouder than ever of your girlfriend. You decide to wear Katie’s jersey and to watch the game with her family in the stadium. Your presence didn’t went unnoticed, but like Katie said, you both didn’t care. To be honest, you even have fun to post what fans like to call soft launch.