#but no it's actually him

[anni-aughta]

watching adventure time at 5am i thought i was hallucinating when i heard bandit heeler's voice come out of the screen

[paintedcrows]

Did anyone tell Ford (bonus doodles: Family Movie Night, 70s Classics)

[windwenn]

‘You were my new dream’ or however the fuck that scene went

[stealingpotatoes]

tried to tell my faithful eunuch Tucker that he was basically tumblr famous, but he was too focused on defending the homestead to care

[archi-pelago]

maybe never forgive. but things are different now. so we'll use maybe.

[magentasnail]

served my duty as an autistic artist and made a bunch of autism creature reaction images

[unsung-idiot]

don't show him modern technology; it won't end well

bonus under the cut:

[markwateneymemorialcrater]

Please note. The orange one is not included because A. He isn’t a billionaire. And B. Calling him obnoxious is too kind for him.

[demonicsuffrage]

Bruce dropped out of medical school and as much as he tries to hide it, his kids all find out. Ofcourse they never let him live it down after that

Emo 21-year-old Bruce: You're not my father, Alfred!

Alfred: Quite right. I have a medical degree, and you don't.

Bruce:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dick: Hey I'm dropping out of Gotham University

Bruce: What? You're quitting college halfway?! Unacceptable, you cannot just give up on your engineering degree-

Dick: I did not just hear the failed doctor say that

Bruce:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bruce, fuming: You left my side tonight to go and gallivant around with harley quinn? A villain?

Steph: So what if she's a villain, Bruce? Atleast the villain has a doctorate.

Bruce:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bruce, bandaging Duke's wound because Alfred was busy: There, all done

Duke: Woah, didn't expect that from a college dropout

Bruce:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bruce: Stop ignoring my orders in the field! You need to listen, I have more experience-

Jason, as red hood, with his PhD in English: Which one of us actually has a Dr in front of their name?

Bruce:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tim: So I'm dropping out of high school

Bruce: You too?! First Dick and now you?!

Tim: No, first it was you, then Dick, and now me

Bruce:

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bruce: Damian, your recent report card indicates you're falling behind in Biology

Damian: Tt. Must run in the family, then.

Bruce:

[itsgonnagetinspiringsoon]

FUCK

[isagaiia]

jayce is so greedy smh

[dante-mightdie]

your dickhead boyfriend who knows simon is obsessed with you and instead of confronting him about it, he just decides to “lower your value” in front of him except simon is too far gone now

revealing his pet peeves about you, what you’re like to live with. he thinks telling simon about how your hair clogs the shower drain or how you you forgot to flush the toilet after you peed this morning will turn him off but he’s never been hornier in his life

all he’s doing is adding fuel to the already out of control fire. you’re the love of his life, nothing is off-limits to him now. he won’t play this game with your boyfriend, no one humiliates simon’s wife.

“strange.” is all simon says, taking a sip of his bourbon

“what’s strange?”

“nothin’ jus… can’ imagine wha’ it’s like bein’ a pussy tha’s afraid of piss an’ hair.”

[hansoeii]

surprisingly, viktor is quite the hugger. Only jayce knows this, of course.

[master-thief-gray-shadow]

Everyone wants to talk about how Senshi is a tumblr sexyman but...Senshi is actually attractive. Like even aside from the fact that he's pretty good-looking he's a nice, sweet guy and he can cook and loves doing it. He's a perfectly eligible candidate for marriage, which kind of goes against the spirit of a tumblr sexyman.

Chilchuck, however? Chilchuck is a tumblr sexyman. What the fuck do you people see in him

[spookberry]

this came to me in a vision

[rin-sith]

One of my favorite post-EPIC headcanons is that Odysseus' family is just completely accepting of all the unhinged sh*t that he's done.

Odysseus, over dinner, some 2 months after his return: And then I finned the sirens, letting them drown. We ate the tails later.

Telemachus, starry-eyed: OMG GUYS THAT'S MY DAD!! THAT IS!! MY DAD!! (points excitedly) ISN'T HE INCREDIBLE?

Odysseus: And later when he wouldn't stop being in my way I stabbed a god repeatedly with his own trident.

Penelope, heart-eyed: That's my husband. My love. Love of my life. You slay, my king.

The rest of the people at the table are 100% freaked out and probably terrified, btw.