#but my crack ship I only really ship because I find the concept of it hilarious lmao

[sweetandglovelyart]

Instead of drawing some Metadede art or Taransusie art for Valentine’s Day I’m considering drawing some art for my Kirby crack ship instead, just because I think the concept of this particular ship is hilarious. It makes zero sense on the surface, but in a weird way I think that it could actually kind of work if certain things were addressed.

I won’t reveal what the ship is right now, but if I have time to draw something for it for Valentine’s Day then I’ll reveal it on Valentine’s Day. I don’t think that anyone will be able to guess what the ship is, but I’ll give you all a hint: both characters debuted in the same game. Not saying which game in the series, but they first appeared in the same game.

[lilybecca1]

Hi! Can I ask your top 5 fav BKDK fics recs? Thx so much 🥰

Hi! Sure! *Pulls out a list*

Okay just kidding

I've read like a TON of bkdk fics so far but the ones that actually got to me are just a few.

Starting with: The Way You Used To Do by edema_ruh

Yeah, no one can say that it's overrated because it's the absolute best bkdk fic I have ever read out of, well, A LOT. It's also the first ever bkdk fic I have ever read, which doubles the attachment I have towards that fic cause imagine being introduced to the world of fanfictions about your favorite ship and starting out with THE saint scroll of BakuDeku 😭 that fic set the bar higher than the freaking Mount Everest and it left a lasting scar in me so yeah, I don't think any other fic will ever top that one. It's a must read, if you're a BKDK shipper and haven't read it yet that's illegal. TWYUTD is my shrine.

Second one, I would have to say In the Dark by Jane_Harl0w. Actually, my top 4 fic recs are all some of the first fics that I have read so that probably contributes to the reason why I have such high expectations of bkdk fics 😂 Like the beginning of In the Dark, holy sh*t. Almost as good as TWYUTD. And the ending freaking broke me. (Spoilers ahead). I remember reading the second to last chapter and I kid you not, I was in DISTRESS, cause there was only one more chapter left and no way the story was going to have a good ending cause they were kidnapped and there's no way in hell they would survive and escape when there's ONE chapter left. And then I clicked on the last chapter and saw the "Trigger warning: s**cide" and I broke 😭 I'm pretty sure I cried for hours cause I seriously believed they were gonna die and the absolute DREAD I felt when I knew the story wasn't going to have a good ending. But then it actually did have a good ending, and that's the only reason why In the Dark isn't number 1, because I would have been traumatized for life if the story actually ended how I thought it would.

There was also a lot of fluff and I loved their interactions, it reminded me of how they would have been like as childhood best friends. Although I kind of hated all the smut ngl, that ruined it for me a little. Without it, In the Dark would definitely rival TWYUTD for me.

Number 3: The Devil Ships ZeKu by xairylleactually. I had no idea what the fic's title was for such a long time cause my stupid ass didn't save it and I haven't been able to find it for MONTHS but someone finally found it so THANK YOU. It was about Deku and Bakugo finding out that fanfictions exist about each other and a whole lotta pining through it all. This one wasn't even finished, but it was the first time I ever came along this concept and the way it was written was reaaaaaally good.

Number 4 is Operation BakuDeku by ratnotfound

It's a crack fic, I remember it being hilarious af, also there's a lot of fluff. Really loved the texting theme in it and the class interactions. Even Mineta lmao. People can hate on him as much as they want but he can be funny as hell sometimes.

I actually wasn't sure what to put on the number 5 spot but I ended up with Fire Lily by EtherealBeing. The reason I loved this fic so much is because of the world building. Cause like goddamn I could make my own fanfiction about the world alone 😂 the angel world, the demon world, the lore behind God and the Deep, everything was so genuinely interesting to read that I swear I enjoyed the world building better than the actual bkdk in it lmao. (Although that church scene was kinda top tier ngl)

Also honorable mentions:

Deku Enchanted by s_the_queen (didn't finish it but the beginning was hilarious af, I swear it's one of the funniest I've read out of all of them. Deku basically gets hit by an obedience quirk which makes him obey whatever people ask from him, creating a lot of...interesting situations lmao )

They ship us? by Raltaya (don't remember it much but it was pretty good. It's about Bakugo and Deku finding out about their ship and then pining for each other)

If I Have You by dommymommy (it's not finished yet but the ANGST and it's not even the typical kind of angst, it's actually good and it deals with more mature feelings than just simple pining and being flustered around each other. Their relationship is much more grounded in this one, but with a lot more heavy feelings than other fics. I definitely recommend reading it, it filled my soul with warmth. It's the perfect example of when you know you love each other but it hurts too much to be together)

I've read tons of Villain Deku fics but so far Forget Me Not by Scorned_By_Thornz (WynterThornz) was the only one that actually made me believe that he COULD become a villain. The pure angst, humiliation, and sickening feelings between them is just wow. Prime example of how a relationship can turn bitter even though you love each other. Has a good ending, but man I feel sorry for Izuku for how they treated him in the fic.

Dreams Change People by FireRuby1 (it's a time travel fic where they get stuck in the past and relive their childhood experiences. Lots of good moments but the moment when Bakugo relived the river scene was what sold me.)

To Stand by Your Side by aeronines (also didn't finish this one cause I was too impatient...yeah, I have commitment issues, anyway...but this fic was actually really good, Bakugo is younger in this one and Deku is a pro hero, and it was very interesting to see their dynamic this way)

Hero Class Civil Warfare by RogueDruid (Icarius51) (Not specifically bkdk but Deku is really f*king smart in this one, the plot twists are insane, like fr kudos to the author for coming up with them cause I for sure would have never been able to. The story itself is about a competition between the Hero and the Villain team, and Bakugo is the leader of the Hero team while Deku is the leader of the Villain team. The Villain team is low-key badass in this one)

Mirror Image by Eleke (Bakugo gets sent through the multiverse in this one. Pretty interesting AUs appear, and I liked the ending a lot)

In Another Life by Hollandvice (A part of me died with this fic. But in a good way. Like it could have had the opportunity to complete break my soul if the ending went down differently, so thank f*ck that it didn't, I narrowly avoided future heart problems. It's damn well written and I recommend it to everyone who wants to read an emotionally impactful story)

Get on my Level by Mikacrispy (this time Bakugo is the pro hero and Izuku is the younger one. Lots of fluff and I really loved the ending, it was very touching)

To Win You Again (with trembling hands) by DoesItSaySassOnMyUniform (this fic was amazing, especially the ending. I absolutely loved their confession, it was the most realistic confession I have ever seen in any fic so far)

That's it, I hope you'll like these fics too! 💚

[rachetmath]

Favorite Jaune Ship

Okay, let me do this. My Jaune ships. Other ships I’ll do later.

Lancaster/SilverKnight (Jaune x Ruby);

This ship still holds a special place in my heart and to me was supposed to be one of the factors of the show. Jaune and Ruby's relationship started at Beacon. Jaune was Ruby’s first friend and was the first thought of being a part of a team besides her sister. Unfortunately, she was stuck with Weiss and Jaune had a crush on her. Ruby has times when she and Jaune talk but were always cut short for reasons. However, after the fall of Beacon, I was happy to see her and Jaune team up. But my hopes were short-lived when Weiss and Oscar came onto the scene. Now, because of them, the one relationship I could support died because the story tries its damndest to push Whiteknight and Rosegarden together. (Like seriously, this is one of the reasons why I hate Oscar to this day. Volume five, to this day, I believe Jaune should have unlocked his semblance for Ruby instead of Weiss.)

DragonKnght/GoldenKnight/DragonSlayer(Jaune x Yang);

Now normally this is a crack ship. This ship is just two people boning for almost no reason, but I can see a story behind this ship with Jaune and Yang being an alternate version of Tai and Raven. Jaune is Raven because both  have supportive semblances, use swords, and have a distaste for Ozpin’s methods. Yang is Tai due to mainly being raised by him alone. Throughout the story, we see how Jaune and Yang interact and how their relationship differs from Tai and Raven’s. How Tai and Raven fell apart and what they should’ve done to maintain it. How Jaune and Yang handle situations differently they’ll always find a way to bounce back by talking it out and giving each other space. Though I believe Bumblebee fans would be offended and probably say, “Blake could add that same effect”, I still stand by this.

SilentKnight(Jaune x Neo)

Cute, deadly, and very sad. I haven't read the book but I have heard about it. Also, I wish they made a movie starring her or gave us an episode but… okay. Back on topic, I find this ship enduring. They have only one thing in common but that's enough to create a dynamic between them. However what makes the ship sad is that Neo will be the only one hurt. Image Neo trying to be Ruby just to be with Jaune only for him not wanting to be with her. Loving and caring for Ruby more than Neo. Neo hates and becomes jealous of Ruby because unlike her Neo has no friends. Roman died. And Cinder betrayed her. Jaune probably being the best thing in her life but she will never have. So sorry folks, Silentknight was a no-go.

Topaz (Jaune x Emerald)

Same as Silent Knight except it's Emerald’s loyalty to Cinder getting in the way of her having any relationship with anyone. Jaune probably would talk to her but trusting her could be too much of a stretch for him. Emerald might as well be one of the few who could talk to Jaune one-on-one and be real with him but still, I don't think neither of them is looking to like each other.

Knightshade (Jaune x Blake)

These two never had a single one-on-one conversation. Like really they barely interact with each other. I would not be surprised if they both got drunk somewhere and were found sleeping in the same bed by accident. But I believe they are good friends.

Knightfall (Jaune x Cinder)

Okay, this can go either way. Jaune is done playing the good guy to a bunch of girls who are favored by everyone and want to destroy the world. Cinder decides to be a good person and wants to redeem herself. I highly doubt this would happen but I love the concept. Imagen Jaune has to tell Cinder to chill out all the time. Then having to be the most patient with her especially when following a plan. Cinder trying to be nice but pushing her feelings down so she doesn't show weakness is funny, sad, and insane.  

Martial Arc and Nora's Arc(Jaune x Ren x Nora)

You two do not deserve him. You had four volumes to talk with this man but you didn't. Ruby knows your leader better. Yang treats your leader better. Shit Weiss treated your leader better. Ya’ll barely maintain a relationship with each other. How will you two be in a relationship with this guy if you can't contribute or commit to it? F*** the both of you.

Whiteknight(Jaune x Weiss)

Okay, now this may be my f*** all worst ship. First, I’ll admit Jaune was just a fanboy seeing his female idol for the first time in real life. But as he continues he eventually gets over her a bit. Then in some way, he does try to get with Pyrrha, who was an upgrade. What I don't like about this ship is unlike Lancaster it feels forced. Like in volume five Weiss got stabbed by Cinder for no reason. It should have been Ruby considering Jaune traveled and spent more time with her than Weiss. And Cinder hates Ruby. Then in volume seven she basically used the man to get away from Bumblebee. And the only time she ever acknowledged this man was in volume nine when he turned out to be her favorite character in a story. I may be wrong but no, this is not my favorite.

[lopposting]

guys.

I think I did it.

I think I cracked Lies of P.

(me rn)

i keep going back and forth on carlo's death.

i know i was adamant before, on him dying from the petrification disease. i think logically he would have to have had it because of ergo.

but here's another weird point about his death,

i just realized why we intrinsically think he was killed.

Carlo is wearing his school uniform when his stalker finds him, and on the floor at that. That's quite odd. Maybe not being on the floor, but the uniform. Why the uniform?

"He didn't even come to your graduation?"

For the son of an aristocratic family, would this be the image of a deathly ill son in care? Did Geppetto know? Wouldn't he be in palliative care, as Lady Antonia could afford?

Why wear the uniform after graduating?

"Oh, she's here! Grab her!"

"...Gemini, get rid of them! I'm off!"

Was his death literally right after his graduation, on the same day?

And also, Gemini is a little lamp guy. (She doesn't look to be carrying the lamp.) Why does she tell him to take care of the boys? What can he even do? Tell them off?

Here's another funny thing... We NEVER see Carlo outside of his school uniform. (at least, in the "past", "real" Carlo time line).

And as we know, the school uniform has a prominent Sailor collar, the type that is associated with nautical outfits [down to the three stripes, supposedly called a "naval collar"]. The Graduation pendant that he gives to Romeo is of an anchor. [I know that these are all artifacts of the charity house. but they are nonetheless associated in tangent with Carlo]

When we find Carlo's painting, it's right next to this one of a ship. [also, two bottles on the counter, perhaps representing the "two lives" of Carlo and Pino]

also... when Carlo's memories materialize... it's in the sand. Only on the seaside.

Remember, Romeo seems to be associated with a fire element, and Pino with water, the same seems to go with Carlo. The original novel of Pinocchio itself seems to have a strange fixation on the ocean.

And now, might I present to you:

The DLC images are also of a ship and some kind of water turbine.

Director Choi (in pre-release interview): "I'll put it this way: there are more stories I want to tell in Lies of P, so I hope [it] does well."

Also: "There sure are stories we could not introduce in the game" (talking about the story being adapted into another form)

[basically, that there was more to the story than what was really present in the final game.] I'll leave all this to your consideration without adding my own just yet. (I'll add it in a reblog on my own blog without tagging it) Just kidding I want to keep wasting everyone's time

Perhaps after the events of the game,

This is some sort of effort by Pino to either learn more about the deceased Carlo or try to remember his "previous life" as Carlo, by taking to the sea.

Maybe even after the game, Pino will STILL attempt to "awaken" as him so to speak [:(].

[Maybe he actually will.]

Again, Carlo is strongly associated with nautical elements. Again, he is never seen outside of a sailor suit, basically. Also, when we gain the memories of Carlo, they materialize on the sand, at the seaside. Remember, he DIED in the sailor outfit

Maybe we are to take the "sand memories" more "literally" as they are in the sand?

Did Carlo drown and his body wash ashore, which is why these memories materialize in the sand? Why is he so associated with ships?

Pino is also depicted in the water, remember, including what looks to be concept art that was used for the OST? Maybe it isn't "just" a motif? [even simple things like his "official" coat and his eyes being blue, blue blood's tailcoat, and him being associated with the colour blue in general]

Which is why Pino is pictured in the water, since he was "born" from Carlo's death... He was birthed in the water the same way Carlo died in it?

[more notes in reblog]

[paradoxlemonade]

Mirror Mirror

Fandom: Double Life SMP

Dynamic: Etho & Joel

words: 1313

Warnings: body image issues, insecurity

Ao3: Here!

Summary: Etho doesn't like how he looks. Joel does not know this. Hurt/comfort ensues. (This is my @mcytblrholidayexchange present for @kyleknight! I hope you enjoy ^^)

— — — — —

Joel likes to think he’s a pretty funny guy in his own humble opinion, thank you very much. People laugh when he starts cracking jokes, and those that don’t are probably just peeved that they’re the subject of his mockery—after all, when there’s a punchline, someone has to be the one to get decked. It’s all in good fun!

It’s… disconcerting when someone who’s supposed to be in on the joke isn’t smiling along with it. 

And it’s not like Etho’s even the one on the receiving end! The whole point of the thing is how they—as soulmates—can ruin everyone else’s thumbnails together!

It’s a bit of Etho’s that Joel has always found fun as long as he’s known about it: hiding another layer of visual data in his player code only visible upon lookup is a fantastic prank for messing with one’s friends, since it’ll only show up when they pull his image to build the thumbnail. Etho himself, who doesn’t bother with that sort of menial technicality and just whips out a camera from his back pocket when he spies a good thumbnail, is immune. And sure, sure, Joel doesn’t actually know how to replicate the effect and just went for a plain t-shirt with the face painted on in crooked lines, but it was still funny and would show up on the lookups (And Etho’s pictures, but that’s what hiding the shirt with armor is for).

Joel was grinning like mad as he showed off the creation, hands waving and detailing the concept. Etho gave an affirmation, but he hadn’t seemed particularly enthused with the concept; the mask hiding his face stretched with a smile even as his eyes skittered to the side and hid under knit brows.

So. Joel tries not to let it bother him and simply enjoy the thought of his friends being annoyed with him.

He picks at the hem of the t-shirt as he paces about the Boat Boys (not Small Etho!) base area. The day passes as usual: chaos reigns, problems are caused (all on purpose if asked, mostly on purpose in actuality), and Joel enjoys Etho’s company. Really, the man is a delight—Joel knew of him more than he knew him personally before the latest season, but every new interaction reveals something new about Etho that he didn’t know, and Joel’s actions and mannerisms in turn to him.

Everything seems fine, until. Until, until, until.

Etho removes the secret layer. Joel finds out about it in between sessions and tries (fails) not to take it personally.

It… stings.

The start of the next session and Joel’s ire do not roll in like thunder, but instead stumble in on unsure legs like a fawn. Sure, he’s irritated (and a little offended, and a little hurt), but it’s Etho. So Joel leans on the edge of The Relation Ship and drinks in the sight of the server.

A creaking floorboard from behind him and a gentle wheeze of breath belies Etho’s awaited arrival. 

Without turning around, Joel begins, “I see that you’ve changed your skin?” It’s light as he can manage with a slight chuckle of incredulity, but from the tightness in his jaw, it does little to masquerade much of anything.

“I did, yes—”

“You took the face off? Was it because I—”

“Yeah.”

Joel huffs. “Wow, brilliant.” He pushes off and turns in a single motion, and—

Freezes.

…Any plans Joel has for a polite (but frigid, but pointed, but sardonic) questioning evaporate once he gets a look at Etho’s face.

He looks tired, bags like smudges of coal languishing, shifting with every blink. Every step is upheld with an air of casual nonchalance, but the slight tremble in his fingers betrays him. His pale hair is dull and falls over his scarred eye.

“...You look like a wreck.”

Etho scowls for a bare moment but beats it down to a practiced neutrality. “It’s nothing. I’m fine.”

Joel snorts. “Considering that I hadn’t asked but you tried to deflect anyways, say that I don’t particularly believe you.” He grabs Etho by the wrist and slides past, leading him down to their chests. “Did you sleep at all between now and the last session? Because your eyebags have eyebags. Bet we could fit a whole stack of items in there.” Before Etho can respond, Joel pops the lock on a chest and picks out a loaf of bread. He drops it into Etho’s hands with a nod of finality.

“I slept just fine. And I ate too, if that’s what you’re getting at by this.” He gestures helplessly with the bread. “I told you, I’m fine.”

Joel shrugs. “And I said I didn’t believe you. I can play this game all day, especially since your face isn’t helping your argument.”

Etho scowls again. “Stop saying that.” 

“Saying what? That you look like you’ve been fighting phantoms? And losing?”

 “Joel, please…” His shoulders are drawn in close and his grip on the bread grows tighter, more desperate.

Joel falters.

“Are you… okay?”

Etho makes a face and stalks back onto the ship. “You don’t need to rub it in, you know.”

Joel trails behind him, his sense of assurance drying up. “You’re gonna need to be a little more specific than that, mate. Rub what in?”

He laughs. Laughs. Something dry, something quiet, something brittle. Etho keeps his gaze trained on the bread crust he picks at aimlessly. “I know I’m nothing nice to look at. I’ve known that basically forever. So you don’t need to rub it in; I already know.”

Joel blinks. He stops following Etho’s pacing and stands in place. What does he say to that? “You’re kidding, right?”

Mm. Probably not that.

Etho gives him an unimpressed look. “Why would I be kidding about this? You’ve been saying it yourself all morning.”

Wait, he thought that… and then Joel…

Oh, goddammit.

Joel rubs a hand across his face letting it trail up to drag through his hair. “You look tired, man, not ugly. You’re not a supermodel—so what? Neither am I. And neither is anyone else that we hang out with. You’re in pretty good company.” His feet finally unstick from the floor and he manages to scoot next to Etho, their shoulders brushing. “You’ve been thinking about this the entire break, haven’t you?”

Etho shrugs, as if it hides the way his shoulders droop with the weight of his thoughts. “I don’t… I try not to think about my face too much. Not ever since”—he waves his free hand at the long, ropy line bisecting his face—“that. No mirrors in any of my builds or anything. I guess your silly t-shirt just reminded me that everyone else is looking at me when I talk to them.”

Joel kinda feels bad for taking that personally, now.

He shakes his head. “If you told me what was up, I would’ve ditched the shirt. Here, like this.” He reaches up with one hand and yanks it off by the neckline, tossing it across the ship in the same motion. It hits the wall and slides to the floor in a crumpled heap. “There, now it’s gone.”

Etho takes a minute to gather his thoughts. After a pause, his eyes trail over to meet Joel’s. “Thanks.”

Joel leans over and bumps him, never breaking eye contact. “Bothering people is fun. Hurting them isn’t.”

The moment passes, and Etho turns his attention back to the bread. He slides his mask down and takes a hesitant bite.

— — — — —

Joel leans back and kicks a foot over his leg. “Besides, I can still think of, like, at least three different people who would throw themselves at you in a heartbeat if they thought they had a chance of getting you into bed with them.”

Etho chokes on a mouthful of bread.

[girlfriendsofthegalaxy]

tuesday again 5/7/2024

i have Got to read a book i enjoy this week or my brain will turn into something the consistency of dried tomato paste on a kitchen counter

also i have lost track of the timing and rhythm of the seasons so for the first time in a very long time there is no may starred war tuesdaypost

listening

Chapstick by COIN off my weekly recommended spotify playlist. i don’t think this song is particularly interesting or well-executed as a whole, but the lyrics

She’s a friend of mine, and an alibi

And the getaway car in overdrive, like

Hey sharpshooter, I like the way you’re moving

i think the use case for this song is a telecom company trying to get you to switch by promising some portable Bluetooth speakers for your summer parties and this is playing diagetically as we slip in and out of various summer parties, following one TV-hot woman in a sundress

-

reading

i am once again not sleeping well and have shoved a lot of mediocre books into my gaping maw. i have read a good fuckin chuck of the jason todd outlaws runs. i like jason todd/the red hood bc i feel a certain kinship with someone trained for an incredibly specific thing who are then thrown away the second they stop conforming. darth maul also but that’s a different post.

i have several bones to pick with writer scott lobdell. i know this was the early teens but can we chill with the misogyny for a singular page. why themes of addiction only when it is needed to fill a narrative lull? and why are you continually going to put jason in interesting situations where he might confront his trauma or grow despite his trauma and then. not have him confront his trauma or grow at all because of it??? i like snatches of the early issues of the run, when the outlaws are figuring out how to be a polycule team on the most beautiful deserted island and crashed spaceship you’ve ever seen. i liked the art in most issues and these had just enough fun flashes of character (about every other issue) to keep me reading. but im annoyed by it.

i finally finished Wilkie Collins’ The Moonstone, the first physical paper book i have finished in a long time. the flaw of being the first in the english detective fiction genre is that everyone who comes after has a lot of time to perfect it. i felt the actual perpetrator was a little beyond belief and the ending was fumbled. however it was very good at sustaining my interest for like 400 pages. not my picture bc i cannot be bothered to find my copy and bother a cat, but this is the penguin edition i own. i don’t actually know if i will keep it on my shelves but maybe it’s more of a trophy of me getting back into reading physical books?

Alexis Hall’s Mortal Follies also annoyed me. i do not think this author’s strong suit is in longer books. i have read previous books in two hours and change and while i found the ending here satisfying from a fairytale perspective, i did not enjoy the path we took to get there. i thought we were ending and wrapping things up at least three times, and the number of Things that happen in order to carry us on to the next Thing does not feel gleefully madcap but sort of frantically shambling. a very classic three-days time limit is introduced in the middle, it is met, and then we continue on for several months. also the author introduces the concept of shipping your friends with an equally made-up word as shipping through one of the more tiresome characters in the novel and this…cracking? chip? in the fourth wall? fucking annoyed me. it felt very out of tone with the rest of the book. surely there was a better way for this character to express that she wanted the two leads to be together

-

watching

Hammerhead (1968, dir. Miller). this is leaving tubi soon and sometimes the heart needs a silly little James Bond ripoff. had high hopes for this one bc it was rated R and the baddie was obsessed with collecting vintage erotica. i don’t really know why this is rated R. the erotica we see is almost all prints of Fine Art Nudes. there’s a lot of cleavage and undergarments and bikinis but not like. full frontal at any point. no man has their chest out except for an enterprising motorcyclist near the end.

anyway this is a deeply unserious film, as you may surmise. it’s not much fun, especially when it’s not very good at getting everyone to the next scene. Vince Edwards is kind of a cold fish, i do not know why every woman is throwing herself at him. Judy Geeson makes every scene she’s in better (there’s a very funny scene in a post office where they play both keepaway and the thimble game with an important package) but she cannot hold the whole dragging movie up by herself. god they made leading ladies fucking tiny back then. very throwable

-

playing

not fallow but i don’t have anything interesting to say about genshin this week. a friend started playing fnv after several months of subtle hints, i was only able to join his streams after twenty hours in and promptly let him know the inventory is sortable if you click at the top. how had he been going through his whole fucking inventory for twenty hours like that. a man singularly obsessed with both inventory management and min-maxing caps. he had like 8k caps by the time he got to Novac, taking the normal route. people sure can play games in different ways huh

-

making

put some dijon mustard and some broccoli in some macaroni and cheese. that's about it

[raileurta]

Ranking atsv ships

Spiderdads 9.5/10

This ship is really good! I love the dynamics of Peter and Miguel, they're so interesting to me. The only reason it's not ten is because MJ isn't included.

Flowerpunk 3/10

It's not my thing and it low-key makes me uncomfortable. (I headcanon Hobie to be 17)

Lego99 7.2/10

This is actually the first thing I started shipping in this fandom! This is one of my favorite crack ships period.

Ghostflower 6/10

I think they're cute. I also like the way they incorporated their romance in the movie. (Which is a high tier complement coming from me)

Holofang 8.7/10

I find the idea of these two getting together really intriguing. Robot x human is a very delicious concept for me.

Spiderparents 10000/10

This is the best ship in the entire fandom. Miguel my babygirl deserves to be in a Parker sandwich. Peter has two hands you know?

Punkfang 1/10

While this could technically be legal if Hobie is 18 in canon it's still weird as hell.

Ben99 5/10

I'm kinda indifferent to this ship. I don't really like or dislike it.

Flowerbyte 4/10

I know people will ship anything (I relate) but honestly I don't get the appeal.

Ghostpunk 3.5/10

Same thing with Miles x Hobie but Gwen is 16 so it's okay if Hobie is 17. I still don't like this ship as I see him as an older brother figure to Gwen.

Peni x anyone 0/10

She's like 13, she shouldn't be shipped with anyone period.

Miguel x spidersonas 7/10

It can be a mixed bag sometimes but the good definitely outweighs the bad. I love when people draw their spidersonas [redacted] Miguel especially when he is being [redacted] on [redacted].

Flowerfang -999999999999999999/10

There's not enough words in the English language to describe how disgusted I am by this ship. I should be used to this shit by now but it somehow still surprises me.

Fangbike 6.4/10

There's some extremely tasty fanfiction that I have read of this ship. I won't really seek it out but I won't say no.

That's about every popular(ish) ship I could think of. You can let me know in the comments if I should have included another one.

[saintsenara]

I’m obsessed with your unhinged ship opinions! They’ve really gotten me thinking about interesting combinations which is such a fun activity for the subway

My submissions:

- Narcissa Malfoy/Petunia Dursley

- Voldemort/Molly Weasley

- Nagini/Crookshanks

- Walburga Black/Barty Crouch Sr.

ahhh, thank you so much @epigaea-repens - light of my life and producer of the finest piece of fan art i've ever seen - i'm genuinely delighted to discover that somebody other than me gets something out of doing these.

narcissa malfoy/petunia dursley

i'm oddly partial to a bit of draco/dudley - entirely because the idea of vernon trying to out-pompous lucius is funny to me, as is the fact that they'd clearly both think harry would care and harry's actual response would be 'who's draco?' - and i have to confess myself partial to this too.

narcissa's narrative mirror is molly weasley - both of these women share a certain fierceness [and, especially, a fierceness and strength one might not expect of them at first glance], but they also share a certain disconnection from the rest of their family, and an undercurrent of loneliness can be detected in their characterisation.

this is present in the way petunia is written too - the implication of canon is both that she's married "up" in terms of social class and that vernon is quite a bit older than her.

[and her fandom reception is a victim, i think, of the aging up of the adult cast of the films - petunia is, at most, twenty-four when lily dies. like her sister, she marries and has children young, even by the social standards of 1970s/1980s britain, and having to take on harry changes the trajectory of her life when it's only just started - i am absolutely wedded to the idea, for example, that harry being placed in her care means that she gives up a plan to have a second biological child.]

she is, of course, also confined in a prison which is directly of her own making - the bland domesticity of her perfect little house, all of which is an artifice constructed so she doesn't have to admit how deeply she once longed to be magic. narcissa experiences the same - i always read her as someone who leans heavily on the gendered conventions of the wizarding world as a way of coping with how utterly both of her sisters defied them, and as being someone who is very concerned with keeping up appearances [hence why her wildness and desperation when she goes to see snape in half-blood prince is so shocking]. i think you can imagine that she runs malfoy manor to have the same nothing-wrong-here vibe as number four privet drive, and i think you can do something very interesting indeed with the idea of two women who live behind masks being forced to drop them when they find each other.

lord voldemort/molly weasley

does, in fact, exist, in the form of a story i will recommend to everyone - come slowly, eden by paimpont - which, like all the best rare-pair fics, takes two implausible characters and creates a genuinely meaningful love story between them, through a lovely character study of molly and her ability to notice when people [and, especially, when people who are very much in want of a mother] are hungry.

nagini/crookshanks

i had to look up crookshanks' gender for this - which is a wild thing to say on a weekday afternoon - so that i could confirm... flopping. nagini's a lesbian, crookshanks misunderstood when she said she liked pussy.

it's fine in the end, though. nagini's got something happening with one of the malfoys' peahens, and crookshanks can go back either to the enemies-to-lovers thing he's got going on with mrs norris or to the soulmates thing he's got going on with sirius.

walburga black/barty crouch sr.

i am completely obsessed with this concept, i don't even think it can be considered a crack ship, and i would like to see it written immediately.

debilitating grief at the son you thought you knew disappearing - whether literally or metaphorically? delicious.

[alagaesia-headcanons]

There's something inherently ugly about how you ship Murtagh with Orrin. It's one thing to not like the main ship for a beloved character as set up by the author - valid - but it's another to push half of said ship away to force in your fave pasty white boy. You can write meta after meta after meta all you want about how poor Orrin is done dirty, or how that meanie Nasuada hurt him, or how the books don't put your fave background character on a pedestal, but all your writing amounts to is the fact that you've imprinted on Orrin and are now using him as a vessel for your original character. In your writing, he's not a character from the series anymore - he's your OC wearing Orrin's face and bearing Orrin's name. Which, it isn't bad to expand upon a sidelines character. But it's the way you turn around and spew how fandom fave Murtagh is in love with your OC that really shows the truth and the rot festering in you. You can cry and bemoan the romantic love Paolini has written between Murtagh and Nasuada, but your essay won't amount to jack shit if you're just going to turn around and replace Nasuada with your OC and suddenly sing it's praise.

Before you start decrying all of this, ask yourself: why are you so desperate to discredit canon's romance? It's one thing to think they should both remain single after the trauma they experienced throughout the series - fair take. But then why are you so eager to prop up your own ship? Is "Orrin" inherently more worthy of of Murtagh's love? Or is Nasuada simply not worthy, but instead in the way, in your eyes? You can wish all you want for people to love your writing, but that doesn't hide the rotten foundation of your ship: sidelining Nasuada to uplift your white fave and wanting him to have all that she does. No amount of rambling meta about how they're a "good ship" and they would work will ever cover up your inherent biases and -ism's that your poor sad white boy's ship is built upon.

For the love of god.

Anon, let me just say this to you directly- block me. It's that easy. Sending something like this instead is an embarrassment. But since you've already said your piece, I'll go ahead and say mine.

Let me first bring up what you oddly wouldn't directly accuse me of (maybe even you knew what a blatant straw man it is), that being racism. I'm not going to make light of this. Racism in fandom is a real issue, and separating a ship with a character of color to ship white characters can be a symptom of that. I have never turned a blind eye to this and I make a continual effort to remain conscious of it because it's incredibly important to me that I'm not contributing to this kind of prejudice in fandom.

This pairing started years ago when I thought of a crack ship polycule with all three of them. Over time as I considered that, the idea of shipping Murtagh and Orrin developed into a distinct concept which I found more intriguing than shipping Murtagh and Nasuada. At that point, I made an active decision to examine my interest and determine if it was grounded in the way canon presents the individual qualities and dynamics of these specific characters, independent of the broad groups any of them fall into, or if it lacked any such basis in canon and only stemmed from an unconscious bias of mine. And if I didn't find any substantial elements of canon that supported the idea, I intended to put it away and work through my bias.

So I looked, and I found I could fully explain the reasons the ship appealed to me through the details in the books. I never made some public announcement about taking this issue into full consideration because it shouldn't be performative. Holding myself accountable is a basic personal responsibility which I take seriously, not something to make me look better. But it’s always felt meaningful to simply convey that I care about putting thought and reason into my ideas and my preference for my ship isn’t baseless. I’ve done that, but it seems I should be more direct here.

So let me lay out my thought process. Why am I not interested in shipping Murtagh and Nasuada? The things that deter me personally are both emotional and logistical issues. The major emotional issue to me is how disparate their priorities are. Murtagh prioritizes protecting loved ones, which causes issues when he accepts and complies with awful acts while trying to defend them. Nasuada prioritizes the good of her cause, which causes issues when she dismisses another person’s wellbeing when it’s in the way of her goals. Murtagh’s character arc is about learning the best thing he can do for his loved ones might be accepting their willingness to make sacrifices, suggesting he becomes aware of his issue and would try to correct that going forward. However, Nasuada still doesn’t seem aware of her issue after the war, given her policy about magicians and her minimal concern for Roran, so that still presents an underlying problem that would badly exacerbate their serious trauma until it’s addressed.

None of that is a moral judgment on anything. Both of them could cause any number of other issues; it’s just stating where they stand. And I still think they could be written in a way that stays true to their characters while working through those issues so that they stay together. I think it’d be exceptionally challenging, and it still might not be to my own taste, but it has that potential. But there are also logistical issues. Nasuada is queen in Uru’baen. I genuinely feel like this is so meaningful to her character, a very fitting culmination of her aspirations, and if she were to take substantial spans away from her throne, it would be a disservice to how she was written. That said, with the way I characterize Murtagh, I really don’t feel that he would want to openly settle in a place defined by politics and power struggles. I feel like it would be very unfulfilling for him and Thorn, especially in the city of his tumultuous childhood and their tortuous enslavement. So given the dissatisfaction if Nasuada left the rule she wants and deserves and the discontent of Murtagh living in Uru’baen, I struggle to imagine them as more than a distant, intermittent relation.

So that’s why I personally don’t enjoy shipping them. Of course, it’s subjective, but I feel like it’s also fair, and you seem to suggest that you do too. So let’s move on. So now the question is if a potential relationship with Orrin would present the same or equivalent issues that I overlook just because he's a white man.

Naturally, this is subjective too, but I say no. Of course there are still possible emotional issues between them (if there were none it’d be boring), but they’re different. Given the way specific way Orrin grieves for his friends and struggles to have faith in their cause when he sees the risk of his people being killed, I believe he is also more focused on looking after individuals than pursuing a cause. I feel like that lays a smoother groundwork with Murtagh, who has been hurt by people who dismissed his wellbeing, and that reduces a lot of underlying pain between them. Orrin’s other struggles, like defeatism, fear, and hopelessness, as well as yearning for recognition and autonomy, align with Murtagh’s experience more in a way that makes their emotional issues more interesting to engage with.

With logistical issues, obviously Orrin is also a king. But I don’t find that presents the same issues either. I interpret that Orrin didn’t want to be king and isn’t content in that role. When the matter of Murtagh’s desire to avoid being openly tied to Surda’s seat of power arises, I find a much more interesting and balanced potential story where Orrin also hopes to leave his crown and they support each other in their search for a home that they can both make their own. The discrepancies I personally find so bothersome between Murtagh and Nasuada don’t come up with Murtagh and Orrin, so I enjoy their ship more. It’s just about my interpretation of compatibility. That is the crux of my thought process. No one has to agree with it, but I believe it stands as a fair assessment.

You insist that I ask myself why I prefer one ship over another. I've done that. I've already been doing that the entire time and will continue to do so. You keep whining that I make a lot of meta analysis about aspects of the characters and how I feel like they would or wouldn't mesh together, and yeah. That's the whole fucking point. In the same way I just did, those posts explore and articulate the concrete reasons one ship appeals to me and one doesn't. For years I've diligently asked myself why I'm drawn to Murtagh/Orrin more than Murtagh/Nasuada and I'm fully secure and confident in my answer that it's the emotional and narrative possibilities they have that appeal to me more. If I was given all the details of these characters, stripped of any names, descriptions, genders, ect. I know I would still really love this ship.

And that's not even to say that it's somehow "better" (it's just different in a way that suits my taste), or that Murtagh and Nasuada's relationship must be meaningless or non-existent if it's not romantic. In my story where I ship him and Orrin, he and Nasuada go through struggles, but as they grow, they're able to reconcile and learn to better support each other and their relationship ends in a much better place.

(Also, if you're talking about my “essay” that Murtagh's true name doesn't change because he fell for Nasuada, that's irrelevant to shipping them. The series could end with them getting married and they could be my all time otp, and it'd still be true that falling in love didn't change his true name. It's just a separate part of his character arc.)

For another thing, Murtagh and Nasuada are NOT a canon ship, and that does matter. For example, it has very different implications to change an interracial ship that is happily married in canon. In the IC, it is canon that they're attracted to each other, but nothing beyond that. (And I've never even discredited that! In fact, I've said their attraction is well written and in character. It's included in my story; I didn't overwrite it.) They're never in a relationship and there's no set up that implies romance is inevitable for their stories. You yourself acknowledge that there are very valid reasons to interpret that a romantic relationship wouldn't work between them!!! So if it's fine to not ship Murtagh and Nasuada as a couple, why is it suddenly heinous to imagine Murtagh with someone else?

It’s not. Your claims are far more baseless and distasteful. Why do you act like Nasuada couldn’t possibly be respected or worthy without Murtagh’s affection? Why do you act like pointing out her mistakes condemns her entirely, as if she’s not allowed to have any flaws? Why do you think a relationship with Murtagh is equivalent to all that Nasuada has? I won’t make your kind of moral accusations about a stranger, but I will simply say that I find that very objectionable. I love Nasuada for being such a unique, flawed, and fascinating character who is so much more than all that. And if you made such a volatile, deplorable, inappropriate response simply to the idea that Murtagh- a fictional character- could love someone else, you might need to take a step back. You’re being cruel.

(Also, I don’t feel like going through the whole “u just made orrin into an oc” shit tbh. This is long enough. I take care to draw my characterization from canon, but y’all can read my stuff and decide for yourself if you’d like. Although, saying I imprinted on him is the funniest part of this ludicrous message. You know what, yeah. I’ve tricked you all. You thought this blog was being run by a human being? WRONG. Baby duckling.)

[tempests-bards-and-birds]

venti

I’m sure you don’t talk about him enough ; )

ah anon. you know me so well. anyway *cracks knuckles* here we go

how i feel about this character: i think about this character so much it's probably worrying. he's just so complex and compelling - from the moment you first meet him you realise that he has a really unique relationship with the world in general, and just. every time he makes an allusion to something that he doesn't expand upon either because he feels he shouldn't yet or because he's perhaps trying to protect himself i simultaneously want to throw him in the horse plinko and hug him. how do you even live after the first person who was ever really your friend, whose wish was to see the sky from beyond the barrier that was made by a god, dies after you fought for that with him and barely even got a glimpse of the freedom that he strived so hard for. how do you live after you take his form when you end up becoming the very thing that was the cause of your friends' suffering because you maybe feel that it's the only way to keep his ambition and hope for freedom living on after he died because maybe having a god's ideal be a human's wish for freedom is one of the only ways to negate the inherent respect that godhood commands but also probably because you just can't bear to let him go, at least for a period. how do you- *gets dragged forcibly off-stage*

all the people i ship romantically with this character: i can appreciate a lot of the popular venti ships however the only two that have ever really appealed massively to me are xiaoven and zhongven. you can see my post for this ask game about xiao for some my thoughts on xiaoven (i can elaborate if need be though) but for zhongven i just find their relationship sooo fascinating. they've lived through wars together, so chances are they've seen each other do utterly unspeakable things, and even that by itself can produce a very close kind of relationship. on the surface they're polar opposites but when you actually think about it they are fundamentally quite similar, despite their opposing natures. idk something something about a mountain that can erode and change but won't fall or move and the wind that comes and goes as it pleases but can still change it's course and can still come to rest sometimes. you get it right

my non-romantic otp for this character: *chanting* venti and jean. venti and jean. venti and jean. venti and jean-

ok but in all seriousness i just think that explorations of jean's religious devotion to barbatos being put under insane amounts of duress after the events of the mond archon quests very interesting. what do you do when you find out that the god that you devoted your entire life to is not just a concept and is, in fact, a person who's probably pretty depressed. idk. "met god and he's just some guy" type shit

my unpopular opinion about this character: uhhh i can't really think of anything right now? maybe how i actually think he's way more moon-coded as a character than sun-coded but i don't see many people on here actually talking about that so idk

one thing i wish would happen/had happened with this character in canon: hehe. haha. forced barbatos reveal to all of mondstadt babyyyyy i feel like backing him into a corner and stopping him from running away from his problems so much would be good for him in the long run

[isagrimorie]

As much as I’ve made peace on Year of Hell just being a two-parter (and I don’t think the characterizations are all lost because the characters still pick up relationships and the characterizations from Year of Hell) but stumbling on what could’ve been for season 4, for a Year of Hell season sounds so intriguing. It really would have moved Voyager from good to greatness of what DS9 was. As we all know, Rick Berman really is the villain of the Trek stories.

The writers of Voyager wanted to go bigger, they wanted to swing for the fences, from TrekMovie.com:

The podcasters and Fuller acknowledged that eventually Voyager found its voice and delved into some high-concept science fiction ideas. Fuller gave a lot of credit to showrunner Brannon Braga and Braga’s writing partner Joe Menosky, while pointing out their struggles with Voyager co-creator and executive producer Rick Berman:

Brannon Braga should be given a lot of credit – Brannon Braga and Joe Menosky – and it really was their two voices more commonly than anybody else’s. I think what was interesting in the evolution of the show was you could sense the creative struggle. I witnessed the creative struggle when I was working there. There was an appetite for these bigger, bolder science fiction stories. And there was a lot of resistance from Rick Berman in embracing them because he was chasing The Next Generation and was not allowing Voyager to be the show that it could be.

But the one I am really interested in, what

Year of Hell could have been

Bryan Fuller: The “Year of Hell” and the behind-the-scenes drama not only to craft episode, but that season, was fascinating because we wanted “Year of Hell” to last the entire season. We wanted to see Voyager get its ass kicked every episode and through that season was going to be marbled the story of Annorax and the time ship that was changing things. So, we would go back to it every once in a while to remind the audience that is the larger story. But [it was rejected] because Deep Space Nine made Rick Berman allergic to serialized storytelling, violently so.

We are really going to be on the outskirts of the galaxy and we are going to be fighting enemies that are kicking us when we are down. The crew is going to have to separate and we are going to be following episodes that are going to deal with people on shuttlecrafts with escape pods that are electrically buoyed together. There would be an episode where you never saw Janeway and never saw Voyager because you are with the people who are on the escape pods trying to find a new source of power or safety. It was like creative crack for the writers’ room, because all of a sudden there were so many opportunities.

I remember Brannon going over to Rick’s office with all of this enthusiasm and coming back broken and his head hanging low and having to break it to the writing staff. We all felt like we were doing it, we are making great Star Trek. For him to come back and say we can’t and we can only do two episodes as opposed to twenty-two, it was heartbreaking. There was an interesting division between what Rick Berman wanted the show to be, which was episodic and for the syndicated audience, and how we wanted to be creative storytellers playing with the Star Trek toy box. “Year of Hell” is such a fascinating point in Voyager history.

This was the part where I had goosebumps:

The crew is going to have to separate and we are going to be following episodes that are going to deal with people on shuttlecrafts with escape pods that are electrically buoyed together. There would be an episode where you never saw Janeway and never saw Voyager because you are with the people who are on the escape pods trying to find a new source of power or safety.

Because one of the more affecting parts of Year of Hell, part 1 was when Janeway was saying goodbye and then telling them that they will see each other again, and the escape pods started jettisoning. My imagination ran wild, I wanted to follow the rest of the crew as they struggled through the year of hell, in Krenim space, that’s constantly shifting in time, trying to survive. And Janeway and the rest of the senior staff finding the rest of her crew. Finding most and failing, maybe, on finding the others in time. It really was fertile ground.

It’s almost comical how much of a Disney villain Berman was just crushing the spirit out of the Voyager’s writer’s room. IMO, this room was the most disheartened group of writers in the whole of 90s Trek. Because they were ready and willing to go the extra mile but Berman was there to swat them down because they could.

And because, it seems, after Piller and Jeri Taylor left, Brennan Braga was too green to butt heads with Berman.

DS9 had Ira Stephen Behr, who wasn’t afraid to go against Berman, as the article goes, the podcast hosts asked Fuller why and how DS9 got away with serialized storytelling:

Bryan Fuller: Ira was like, “I don’t care, this is what we are doing and if you don’t like what we are doing, fire me… If you are not behind it, then I suggest you find someone else to do my job.” He was kind of fearless about it. He was righteous creatively and knew that this was the right direction for Deep Space Nine.

Anyway, this is why I love learning about the Behind the Scenes of shows because it gives context of why and how stories were released the way it did. And it gave Voyager more texture of what it could have been, hampered creatively both by Network and by an Executive Producer who had no imagination.

[sweetertreats]

Honk

A story about a Clown

Sweet Tooth’s very own lil guy circus, now travelling Kalos! A performance where only one man comes out on top, the clown himself. Aged somewhere between middle aged and “Young as a berry”, this clown will have you wishing you never crossed paths with such an entertaining enemy. He won’t wipe your party without cracking a few jokes along the way. He’s not afraid to play dirty, but for the sake of good showman ship he’ll start off fair.

Which would be fair information if I didn’t write it myself, huh? You never know when the shows gonna start, so make sure you have your tickets ready! Or don’t! You didn’t really have a choice. Participation IS mandatory! My pronouns are He/Him, but if don’t worry about forcing the words out of your mouth when you’re warning your friends about the c-c-c-c-c-c-clown. 

[There is a ref below the lil dude intros ;o)]

What do you think? Good show? Bad show? Be honest. I don’t really like liars. 

What a magnificent turnout! I wonder who’s on the cast list?

Machete: A rather interesting looking Honedge with a bit of edge. Pretty sharp, if ya know what I mean.

Mimo: A Mr. Mime with a wonderful outfit! A Fire/Psychic type with a cute outfit to match her trainer’s, what’s not to love!

Vani: A Strawberry Flavored Vanillite with a very creative name! Cherry on top and sprinkles! 

Pretty Kitty: A sylveon that isn’t really expected to fight, just to look pretty for the show! All dressed up with the cutest little outfit, they’re the perfect distraction for any ambush. (to be designed) 

Dizzy: They say no two Spinda are alike, but they can be if you make yourself dizzy enough! This dude’s all dressed up in his clown best! A classic puffy little outfit that’s sure to make you forget the trainer behind him. (to be designed) 

Squishy: A Banette with a rather silly look to her. There’s no time like the present, and Squishy’s little tricks will have you rolling on the ground with laughter! (to be designed) 

now for some ooc info.

hi! names padfoot! i am an adult, so this entire blog is adult run. this is my first time running something like this on tumblr!!! so i am very excited! Sweet Tooth is adapted from the Twisted Metal series! I say adapted because he has been tweaked just a bit to fit the setting, but he’s still a loveable evil clown either way. everything will be tagged either with basic pkmnirl or rp tags :)

as far as everything goes, the concept of adapting him in this way, his design, and his first three pokemon are all credited to @moderator-monnie and @lazy-charlie ! the current pfp and the forever existing reference art was done by lazy-charlie! 

pfp and banner will be updated with the full cast at some point or another, but for now its just the truck and such. the other three pokemon will be drawn up and posted whenever i’m able to do digital art again, so far now text based description is all you get :( 

dni is basic, no nsfw (suggestive is ok!!!), no type of hate fuelled phobias, no slurs, no zoos maps or drama starters.  if i dont respond please dont get too upset about it, i will try and make responses to everyone that i can but if i miss you feel free to try again! just dont spam. as stated, i am an adult so i do have an adult life i need to tend too alongside this silly little project. 

for now responses will remain text, in the future some may be drawn if i cant find the words for things but we will see!

messages are open for rp requests, story building, or things like that :3 please respect that i am free to deny, block, or ignore any requests that make me uncomfortable. 

yahoo yippie wahoo! little dance! you made it to the bottom! do a little dance!!!

[rriavian]

Unofficial Business

So @jessamydreams wanted Corintheus cuddling and ever since Deliverance I've really loved soft!Corintheus ideas and them cuddling is currently one of my favourite things haha. So I posted a little snippet a while ago and I've finished the main/first bit of it. So I hope you enjoy!

-

It’s dark in the Dreaming.

Not shade, this is the sun going out—sudden, unexplained, cold—a lack of it even for the residents of the Dreaming, for the King’s creations, for the Corinthian, for even all who see with more than just eyes. This lack of light crosses from spectrum to concept because the idea of light has gone, the Corinthian’s sight remaining only by touch, by teeth licking the air, by feeling the breeze still caressing his tongues. Nothing else seems amiss, the Dreaming remains whole, but there is an uneasy murmuring amongst the dreams and nightmares that live here.

He senses the glances in his direction, feels their regard as a bitterness on his tongues, resents how they seem be waiting for him to take the cue to check it out.

The Corinthian will not.

He expects Lucienne will soon be exiting the palace with an explanation, will not linger for it as if he takes his lead from her, even curiosity not enough to win a fight against pride. Then Matthew finds him, the raven a sudden brightness only a star by contrast—glossy eyes a silver glow, the only light left outside it seems—passes on a summons, one from the King, and that is far harder to ignore. This time curiosity does win out, drives him to slink inside the palace, and there the Corinthian first finds flame.

He finds corridors lit by torches.

The King's room lit by Dream.

The Corinthian can see the glow through the cracks before he even opens the door. Then for a moment he can’t see at all—this light the only kind that can blind him, the only kind that does—then soft twilight, safe to blink in, the one that makes it safe to open your eyes. Dream is filtering it down, has done so without him even having to say a word, and it’s moments like this that make the Corinthian believe he really is his kings favourite.

Dream’s cheeks are flushed.

It’s subtle, just a light rosy pink, a crack in marble nonetheless, giving the game away because this delectable shade now highlighting sharp cheekbones is a clue to blood beneath. This a treasure map, where to dig or perhaps where to mine, this glimmer of quartz coyly announcing a vein of precious ore. The Corinthian wonders how deep it goes, wonders how this shade might darken, wonders how he can find out. Dream’s eyes are glassy, dazed, this starlight fever bright—how uncharacteristic for a star, how like flesh and bone—an answer to another question.

Outside the palace the Corinthian knows that the Dreaming is dark.

The sunset’s blushing here.

“You sick or something.” The Corinthian says abruptly.

He’s unable to help himself, unbalanced, blindsided to the point of almost not knowing what to say. Perhaps it’s because his eyes can finally feast, teeth no longer skittering off, sinking deep into a weakness he’s been built to taste and yet always been denied.

“Yes.” Dream replies.

The Corinthian has a look at that.

Dream is curled up under black sheets; not huddled, but leaning, testing the crutch of resting to see if it suits, sinking into the pillows. He’s sinking into it like waves pulling a ship beneath the sea, greedy not for softness but for novelty. It’s white skin displayed like sheets of ice against sheets of black, pink lips curving, a shade too dark for the quartz of his blush. Dream’s hair is tousled as ever, delicate and soft and oh; this is pleading, begging the Corinthian to come closer, to get hands on him, to get fingers in his hair.

To twist tight to make him whimper, to croon that he should make that sound again, that he should make it louder.

The Corinthian finds he likes it.

He likes it very much.

“I didn’t think you could get sick.” The Corinthian drawls.

“The alternative was unacceptable.”

The response isn’t so much clipped as insufficient, no hint of embarrassment for being seen here like this, because as always Dream just isn’t inclined to explain. It seems he is inclined to frown, brow furrowing unhappily as the Corinthian stands and stares, leaning against the door frame but not taking a single step inside.

His lips are dry, Dream licks them, swallows.

“You will join me.”

“In bed?”

“Yes.”

The Corinthian smirks. “Sure you—”

“Not for that.” Dream rolls his eyes as if he’s being foolish, then follows up with something so outlandish the Corinthian can’t believe it’s said with a straight face. “I would like for you to stroke my hair.”

There goes his belief that the king was at least lucid.

Dream’s eyes narrow dangerously.

“Now.”

The Corinthian laughs as he begins to approach. “So damn prissy today.”

The mattress dips under his weight.

Dream’s shoulders are bare above the blanket, the silk tucked up around him, and the Corinthian’s fingers deftly find the edges of it. He dips them under, brushes against skin, raises a brow.

“Are you naked under there?”

“Of course.”

The tone isn’t perplexed—Dream never is, even when surprised—treating this unexpected inquiry as a statement against what’s obvious. The Corinthian is far too intrigued to call him on it now, lifts the blanket so he can get under it, lays back against the cushions of this luxurious bed. Dream doesn’t lean against him, for all he’s asked the Corinthian to join him here he doesn’t inch closer, remains looking up at him expectantly.

Impatiently.

It seems this is still the Corinthian’s move.

So he gathers the King into his arms—picks him like plucking an apple from a tree, lush and ripe for him to taste—arranges Dream so that he lays curled against his chest, one cheek pressed against the Corinthian’s shirt, legs a deliberate tangle. For once he finds a subtle warmth beneath Dream’s skin; those ice sheets are melting, it seems, heat seeping beneath the Corinthian’s clothes, burrowing through fabric to find bare skin, and when he raises a hand to Dream’s hair the King himself arches into it.

“Happy?”

“Yes.” Dream says softly; dazed, softening like he’s shaving into snow, still pushing into the fingers combing through his hair. “Continue.”

The Corinthian does.

He glances down, gets stuck there, stuck tracing the profile of the King’s face from afar—ocular tongues can’t help but lick the back of the Corinthian’s teeth, want to lick him, want to trail along both cheekbones—the blushing quartz perhaps a touch darker now. The Corinthian’s fingers are so close to Dream’s cheek, could press down on skin, could slice with a nail and see how close to the surface this vein of precious ore really is. For now he repeats, fingers curling through dark strands with a half completed urge to pull, satisfaction in the doing, pleasure even as the motion ends in a soft caress.

The Corinthian decides to use a little more of his strength, massages the King’s scalp, tugs as he withdraws, slides back to touch again. It provokes a questioning sigh that quickly melts into a pleased hum.

Dream doesn’t speak for a moment.

“I believe when humans are ill they are given soup.”

The Corinthian pauses with his fingers twisting in Dream’s hair.

“I’m not feeding you soup.”

[sunshine-in-a-bottle]

hello, suds :D

i come with six ships for the shipping bingo card (pick and choose which ones you want to do): c!dreamnoblade, c!dreamza, c!awesamdrunz, c!aswesamdream, c!awesampunz, c!drunz (for the first two you can also use the bingo card from here (https://www.tumblr.com/sunshine-in-a-bottle/764332055865835520)

I am frothing at the mouth. God you are being so nice to me right now and letting me be insane. I appreciate you so much.

DNB^. I did both because of course I did. I love your template I Needed To Use It.

DNB obviously got a lot more for the second bingo than the first because they are objectively the healthiest possible pairing you can get here. Look at them. Theyre perfect for each other. Theyre narrative foils, theyre parallels going in opposite directions but forever side by side in their path. It would have to be a very specific universe for them to even BEGIN to be able to make each other worse.

I know because of the way things worked it couldn't be called something canon, but in a world where the DSMP was made in a different medium, DNB would have been an excellent endgame for both of their characters. It maximizes their healing. They both get to be understood at a fundamental level, and seek comfort that they just wouldn't be able to get from other people.

Techno gets to take care of someone who really needs that care, someone who laughs at his jokes and finds him funny, someone who is rewarding to try and make laugh, because god knows Dream tries so hard to be insurmountable. Dream gets that personal attention he so desperately needs without being enabled or placated, or shut down for expressing clear boundaries. Literally my only gripe with the pairing is that its so healthy that I can't go batshit insane about problematic behavior like I like to do.

But honestly the yearning can be so intense that it makes up for anything else. My god can these two yearn, quietly but intently.

Dreamza^. By god this is the greatest crack rarepair to have ever existed in the history of ever.

Its so incredibly unlikely to happen just because of how canon went, but they have so much hidden potential as both a character study and for Shenanigans. They're both admins. They meet for the first time because Philza broke into Dream's server. Philza's son has made Dream's life miserable. Dream is like a younger version of Philza in all the confidence and control and burgeoning power that leaves Philza with both a sense of deja vu but also makes him feel like he's back in the old days, when things were a little less complicated. Dream is reckless and has no self preservation, but even if he has the skill to back it up, Philza still can't help but want to watch his back. Dream's trust is fragile and intense and hard-earned, and doesn't it feel good to earn it? To see this silly young man who endures the world feel safe to reach out a hand to Philza and let Philza take it?

Also the AU concept of Dream being an insane coder with no training VS Philza who actually knows what he's doing and is fascinated and horrified by how Dream runs the server is funny, okay?

Also Kristen can watch them fuck, no notes.

^Awesamdrunz. Listen. Listen. I experience mental illness. I'm going directly to super hell. There's so many things wrong with them, and with anyone else this would go terribly but somehow they make it work. This is somehow the healthiest relationship they could achieve. They can make each other so much worse in some ways (excusing each others crimes) but they could also make each other so much better in others (Dream heals, Sam is redeemed, Punz feels less alone.) I read 100 fics about them and they were all my own. I too want to be an evil necromancer who is consistently loafed on and gets self care.

I didn't mark "I wish more people would ship them" because honestly I'm pretty content with the amount of people who do ship them already. This ship is one part porn, one part crack, one part angst, and three parts kidnapping, I'm not expecting everyone in the fandom to turn around and go THERE IT IS. THE SHIP OF ALL TIME when its such a specific flavor of insanity and doesn't have a ton of canon merit. I like being able to bother my friends about it, and everyone who wants to sit with me on tumblr and ao3 and rotate it with me is nice and good. This feels comfortable.

^Awesamdream. I had to take a break from writing this and came back wondering "why didn't I put that they were perfect for each other." maybe it was for Torture in Prison reasons??? Maybe I was thinking about how they aren't a ship that is perfect in a healthy sort of way, theyre both so mentally ill about each other from prison after all, and Sam's control issues don't naturally blend with Dream's control issues.

But I kind of don't mind that they aren't perfect for each other? I don't think they need to fit like a glove, weaving in and out of each other and completely complimenting the other. Their hands don't fit perfectly- if its post prison, especially, since Dream's lacking a couple fingers- and Dream steps on Sam's feet when they dance. But it feels good to write them a little messy, a little fucked up, but still able to Be Good to each other, Sam towards Dream especially. Not healthy, but happy.

(admittedly, I had to write them like that myself for the most part when I first joined the fandom. Most of what Awesamdream was at the time was torture porn and angst, because YKnow, Prison, but I really wanted to explore them Being Happy and wasn't sure where to start. I'm really grateful for the dreblr discord server for giving me a place to write a lot of my early fics for them.)

^SamPunz. Do you understand how delightful these two are? Do you understand The Vibes that they give when they're together. Listen I'm rapidly running out of braincells but I love to imagine just. In the CKAU the way that Punz fundamentally changes Sam for the better by forcibly instilling boundaries that Dream can't instill on his own.

The way that Punz is so misanthropic, so distrusting of people and so angry at the world and at Sam for what he did. Punz isn't sure they want to believe Sam's capable of change, because in their mind it would be so much easier to kill him and be done with it.

But Dream wants and hopes that Sam can be better if they just try, so Punz is forced to Not Kill As A First Solution. Punz is forced to deal with the an absolute travesty of a creeper. Punz goes from "humanity can't be saved lets kill the server and everything on it and becomes gods" to "actually people might be able to change and become better. I don't like having feelings about this. I don't like having to reckon with my own humanity. Goddamn it Sam."

Listen I'm just rotating Punz pushing Sam against the wall, holding the Communication Knife to his throat, and threatening him. Sam is trying very hard not to find this extremely attractive. He is failing.

I need them to fuck.

[jelzorz]

Crack quartet timeline 2: electric boogaloo

BC I'm bored and waiting for a) the 6x03 answer and the 6x04 clue, and b) my last two essays to be released

Some housekeeping for those only just now stumbling on the concept of the crack quartet:

The tdp post-canon crack quartet refers to rayllum and the following set of insane sounding ships: corterry, sorpeli, and claudiez

Yeah I know I'm a nutcase, it's cool

In my defence, I got talked into the other three by @raayllum but when they're right, they're right

Part one of the crack quartet timeline and hcs is here!

A reminder to everyone that the crack quartet can only ever happen years and years after canon when everyone involved is significantly older and able to consent, so please keep that in mind before y'all come at me

Also I share some of these hcs with @raayllum but they also have their own hcs and would be absolutely thrilled to talk about them so please go and encourage them so I'm not the only one in the sorpeli tag

Now that that's out of the way!

When we last left the crack quartet timeline, Viren had returned to Katolis castle and was causing absolute mayhem in the crack quartet family unit. At this stage, Ezran's council consists of Ez, Callum, Rayla, Soren, Barius, Opeli (resigned from High Cleric but still on the council as per Ezran's request) and Clio (the new High Cleric). By now, Callum and Rayla have a little girl called Sarai, Ez is formally courting Claudia, and Soren and Opeli have been told they're expecting twins.

If you haven't read the snake (which I swear I'll finish), our gang agrees (for a very loose definition of agreeing) to give Viren a trial. Callum is furious and has been an absolute asshole about it but it goes ahead with Callum prosecuting and Soren begrudgingly representing his father (because if it's not him, it's Opeli and she is heavily pregnant at this point so...). Viren is found guilty but Ez refuses to execute him (he Doesn't Want To Be That Kind of King) and exiles him instead.

Claudia finds herself with a decision to make: she has always wanted to keep her family together and now it's being torn apart again. The others are SUPER CONCERNED for a hot minute, because if she leaves and breaks Ezran's heart and chooses her father AGAIN after everything that's happened, they will not be able to forgive her a second time. In the end, it's not that difficult a decision to make. Ezran is here. Soren is here. She will have two brand new nieces in the summer. She chooses to stay.

Callum is not happy about Ez's decision but he can't keep disagreeing with him like this either, and together they agree that they both might benefit from a little bit of space. Callum never really wanted to be a prince anyway, and Ez needs the space to come into his own and find his own way, without being parented by his brother. It's tearful, but ultimately for the best, and they're still going to be brothers no matter what. It's the end of an era, but the beginning of a new one too. Callum and Rayla pack up and head for the Silvergrove. Ez et al see them off and promise to come and visit once they've settled in.

Callum and Rayla run into Corvus and Terry on the way who are, to their surprise, living happily together in a partnership no one expected and have been quietly keeping up with the Katolis Castle soap opera. They're glad everything's settling down and gladder still to meet baby Sarai. They catch up before Callum and Rayla continue on their way.

Soren and Opeli's twin girls are born the following summer. It's a tough labour, but the three of them come out fine and Soren heads out to Temple Hill in a rare show of faith to thank the goddesses his wife had once devoted herself to for keeping his family safe. Callum and Rayla return to the castle to offer their support and so Sarai can meet her new cousins. Ez and Callum are reunited and happy to be together again. Tentatively, Ezran tells his brother that he is considering marrying Claudia. Callum takes it well! He's just happy that Ez is happy, even if he's still a little apprehensive about Claudia's presence in the castle.

Claudia takes it less well. She knows what she is and what she's done. She knows how this will look to people who know of her crimes but don't know her. When Ezran asks, she says no. Then she disappears.

Callum is Fucking Furious. How dare she. How dare she hurt his brother like that. How dare she leave. This isn't digging up any old wounds At All. And although he promises Rayla that this has nothing to do with what happened when they were kids, Rayla still remembers how much she hurt him and can't help but wonder if he still feels that sting, even after all this time. And she wants to fix this! She can't stand seeing her boys hurt like this. And who would know where Claudia went better than

Soren. The poor man is exhausted. Y'all thought one newborn was bad—try two. He and Opeli take turns with the girls but the added stress of Claudia disappearing isn't doing them any favours. But he has enough brain left in him to guess the one place Claudia might have gone.

He reaches out to Corvus and Terry who are a hub for information at this point, and they point him the direction of a small town in the Independent Isles. There's an ex-mage over there that they keep hearing about. Apparently he was exiled from Katolis last winter. Does that help at all?

Sure does. But who to send? Ez can't go, and Callum shouldn't go, and Rayla can't go by herself. Soren doesn't want to leave Opeli but, in her words, their duty is to Ezran, and Ezran needs help. Claudia is his sister too and Opeli insists she'll be fine with the twins. He should go with Rayla. Reluctantly, he goes, and they're halfway out to the Independent Isles when who should they find stowed away in the back of their carriage but Ezran, who is sick and tired of having other people deal with his problems for him. If anyone's going to convince Claudia to come home, it's going to be him.

They find Viren helping to rebuild a village on the coast of one of the Independent Isles. It's awkward, but Viren is definitely better than he was when they saw him last, and he's glad to know that Soren and the twins are doing well. He hopes to meet them one day but won't hold Soren to that if he doesn't feel comfortable with it, but Soren surprises them both with "maybe one day". Viren tells them that Claudia was here but left again not long after. He asks Ezran what happened. Ezran won't say. Still, he tells them Claudia went to Del Bar and wishes them well.

@raayllum and I have discussed this At Length, but they find Claudia hiding in Del Bar and seeking guidance from Lissa. Lissa is more surprised than anyone to see the King of Katolis at her door with her son and an elven ambassador, but ultimately, whatever happens next is Claudia decision.

What happens next? I don't know yet! But Claudia does eventually come back, and everything does eventually work out. If I ever finish the snake, I'll write this too. And I might be crazy but the Katolis Castle soap is never ending and full of drama and I love that for them.

[thefirstknife]

Something I've been thinking a lot about has been the TFS Collector's Edition book. Yeah, it's not out yet and all, however. On the preview for it on the store, you can see two pages. And the full text is readable if you zoom in and I transcribed it in full and I've been losing my mind about it for a while now.

So first and foremost, there's two books of some kind. I'm not sure what the one with signatures and symbols is: it's called "Collectio Autographorum" which would be a collection of autographs:

That's not the one I want to talk about. I want to talk about the other one, which is given a description on the TFS store page:

As the final confrontation with the Witness draws near, Eido scours the solar system looking for clues, messages, and intel on the origins of the Witness to share with Guardians. During her travels, she finds a gift to honor your service—a Light to accompany the Darkness.

It's a text from Eido! The book is called "Entelechy" and here's the two pages visible on the store:

I'll put the whole transcript under read more, but before that let me describe what the text is about because it's fascinating.

The left page starts mid-text so a lot of the context is lost. It's seemingly a conversation between two unidentified people that are designated only with a random string of letters and numbers: one is "RS6243199" and the other is "HNW047622." Several lines include uncertain translations. The two discuss the concept of the final shape.

The right page, the one in blue, is text from Eido. The first section features footnotes about parts of the text that we can't see. All three footnotes refer to something that's not visible on the preview. It includes Eido's notes about the way these two individuals talk about the final shape, Eido's confusion about what the Consensus is and finally a note about some sort of "computational assistant" that shares a naming pattern with Vex minds.

Eido continues by talking about some sort of "Scribe Archive" that might be referring to the conversation of the two unidentified individuals she's analysing (this archive is also referenced in the first footnote). She says she followed crumbs of data to a databank from a "Rainship" (ship from the House of Rain) that originally crashed on Mercury. Saint and Osiris help her get this information and the trio talks about Mercury; how it used to be a garden world, how the sun never sets there and how Eido is eager for Mercury to be returned from the Witness' grasp so that she may visit.

We don't know the timeline of this of course so we have no clue when this conversation is happening and therefore we can't say what's up with Mercury and its possible return. The only thing I'm mildly sure of is that this conversation is probably taking place around the same time period we're in now; Eido is currently travelling and investigating things in order to help prepare us for the fight in TFS. It's certainly happening after Ahsa's reveal about the Witness because down in the text Eido identifies the individuals in the text as ... members of the Witness's species. Its precursors. It's her speculation and leads her to believe it's the first ever mention of the concept of the final shape, as discussed by the people that would later turn themselves into the Witness.

Very interesting! Most of all what's interesting is the implication that Eido somehow found records of a communication log from literally the most ancient of times and the possibility that this log was being kept on an Eliksni ship that crashed on Mercury (or at least that this ship had some sort of a code to crack this communication's log; it's not very clear because again, we're missing quite a lot of context). It's an interesting possibility! And of course, a really intriguing look into what the Witness' species was like and how they talked before they became the Witness. At least two of them!

Also I have no clue what the images on the left page are. It's incredibly hard to see even if you zoom in. Because of the mention of Vex minds and Mercury, my brain immediately tried to identify it as something Vex, especially because of the colouring as well, but I genuinely don't know. It could be anything.

Something to think about while we wait! I'm super excited to see more of the stuff on the Witness' species and the conversations between these two (perhaps more) individuals in the rest of the book.

Full text below:

Left page:

...Bountiful/Swarm] on their path to their great, fatal error. It did not stop the [Conquerors/Primacy/Sovereign] from using the gifts it granted for subjugation. Are we to accept that these, too, were meant to happen? If you reject the notion that destruction can be a final shape, how are we to accept that the Gardener allowed us to make such grievous mistakes? [RS6243199] Even after all these millennia, there is much we do not understand about the Gardener. Perhaps we will not understand until we have achieved the final shape for ourselves. [HNW047622] And when we have reached the final shape, will it all make sense? Will we all be able to live in a universe where people act, as they have always acter, for the self-evident good? Where evil does not exist because we do not allow it? Where all aligned without suffering or doubt? [RS6243199] This isn't like you, my friend. I am coming to see you. All will be well. TRANSCRIPTION ENDS

Analysis by Eido:

SCRIBE NOTES * The final shape is no longer described with a sensory semantic cluster (c.f. SCRIBE ARCHIVE X1-2-4A), but HNW and RS continue to use that structure to describe other concepts. Potentially reflective of semantic narrowing? ** Given the terminology, this Consensus might have been some sort of governing body, or a source of philosophical guidance. *** From this context, some sort of computational assistant? There appears to be some etymological overlap with the names of Vex Minds. Something to investigate later, perhaps! My cross-check for the identification code in SCRIBE ARCHIVE X1-2-4A proved quite fruitful. The trail of datacrumbs led me to a databank retrieved from a Rainship originally downed on Mercury! The Saint and Osiris were kind enough to share it with me, along with a pot of tea. Our conversation was most illuminating. I understand that Mercury was a scorched wasteland before the Great Machine's arrival. When it had finished, Humans could walk unprotected on its surface. What wonders the Great Machine can work! I can only hope that Mercury will return from the Witness's clutches, released as Titan was, so that I may see it for myself. I hear that, thanks to Sol engulfing its sky, one could study without pause... or at least until exhaustion proved greater than the desire to learn! Perhaps I could catch up on some light reading... In any case, the concept of the final shape has worn many faces. From your encounters with the Disciples of the Witness we know that they all had their own understanding of this concept – that they all saw what they wished to see in it. But this communications log, here, appears to predate all of them. If I am correct, and the parties communicating are among the Witness's precursors, then this may be the concept's original form. We can see in this log that HNW and RS, at least, were preoccupied with the concept of a higher purpose. They sought...