#but my brain is telling me that if i do that i’m in awful selfish person who doesn’t care about other people

[yorktaylor]

.

[ponderingmoonlight]

How JJK men act when you have insomnia (can't sleep)

Pairing: Gojo x fem!reader; Toge x fem!reader; Megumi x fem!reader (special thanks to @belovedvamp for that jaw-dropping gorgeous Megumi requests, like wow)

Word Count: 2.5k

Warnings: nightmares, angst to comfort in everyone, I would like to point out that Megumi is my favorite part and that I'm thinking about doing a Part 2, so if you're invested definetely let me know 😭not 100% proofread yet

Gojo Satoru

„Huh, why are you still awake babe? Aren’t you tired?”

Satoru takes in your gorgeous sight, how you lay curled up in your shared bed with your sleepy eyes darted towards him. God, why do you have to be so stunning, why does the selfish urge to keep you awake a little longer become almost unbearable for him when he knows exactly why you’re unable to sleep?

The mattress gives in under your boyfriend’s weight next to you, his hand gently caressing your head. You feel drunk, as if your body doesn’t function properly anymore. No wonder, after all you were awake for more than 30 hours by now, fighting and fighting to finally exorcise a bunch of special grade curses while Satoru was busy somewhere else.

But you’re scared to close your eyes again, to get confronted with the horrible things you’ve saw today. After each and every mission, your brain haunts you with awful nightmares, reminds you of all the death, all the injured, all the things you’ve lost.

No, you just can’t take it. You’d rather stay up a little longer in desperate hopes to be spared than risking to have another bad dream.

“I’m fine. Don’t worry about it”, you mumble into your heavy blanket, eyes drifting to the window.

It began to rain, heavy droplets pounding against the glass violently, thunder erupting in the dark sky. Carefully, Satoru lays down beside you, wrapping his strong arms around your waist.

“I know you’re lying”, he mutters against your sensitive neck.

“Is it because of your nightmares?”

You turn around to face him in utter surprise. When did you ever told him about those nightmares? You always kept them to yourself, suffered through them on your own. After all, Satoru is a very busy man who shouldn’t have to worry about something like a bad dream. Yes, it seems pretty ridiculous to whine about your nightmares when the strongest of them all is the one you’re talking to.

“Don’t worry about that, I’m fine”, you lie into his face, gifting him a small smile to convince him.

But your eyes don’t lie. They show nothing but terror and dread, nothing but fatigue and alertness at the same time. Suddenly Satoru’s heart feels heavy. He should have realized it sooner, the way you always go to sleep after him when you were out on a mission. Why did it never cross his mind that all of this might be too much for you? Maybe because you’re so damn strong, maybe because you make it look so damn easy every time, carrying the weight of all those missions so that his students don’t suffer.

“It makes no sense to lie to me. Why didn’t you tell me about it, babe? I’m sure Shoko might be able to help you-“

“There’s nothing anyone could do about this”, you interrupt him immediately.

“Trust me, I tried everything out there. I guess this is just how my brain tries to cope with all those things, the people dying and stuff…”

“But you don’t have to go through this alone. We’re a team, remember? Why don’t you wake me up whenever you feel upset? Why do you go to sleep after I’m already passed out? (y/n), don’t do this to yourself.”

Gently, he cups your cheek with his hand, forcing you to look up at him. Oh, how much you hate that familiar feeling. That feeling of being useless, of being weak. Are you really too frail to even sleep after a mission? Why aren’t you able to handle the things you see like the others, like Kento and Satoru? All that training, all that power just to cry in your sleep over the things that happened hours ago.

Truly pathetic.

“Do you really think you’re alone? Especially in the beginning, Kento was plagued by nightmares each and every night so much that he couldn’t even fall asleep. Suguru and I…it is always rough, remembering the faces of those you weren’t able to save. But don’t let them keep you awake, don’t think you have to simply endure this. I’m here each and every night to hold you, okay? I’m here, you’re not alone (y/n).”

Oh Satoru.

Without thinking twice, you turn around and intertwine your body with his, desperately trying to keep your composure. How do you even deserve a man like him? A man who seems goofy most of the time but hast the softest side, a man who cares more about everyone around him than himself.

Your boyfriend, the strongest with a heart of pure gold.

“I hate when they haunt me in my sleep”, you finally give in, hiding your face against his warm chest.

“I know, babe. Trust me, we all do.”

Ever so gently, he strokes your hair and back, embraces you in his very own warmth. Satoru feels like home, like the perfection you are chasing each and every day. What would you even do without his loving arms as your home? Where would you be without his constant support? All those nights he stood by your side, watched a awful romantic movie so you’d feel good again. The countless times he cooked your favourite meal for you, only to throw it away and order food afterwards. All those times he rushed to your side when you got injured, how he always manages to be right by your side when you wake up. And oh, how tender is touch feels against your skin, how his warmth embraces you with every inch of his body. He feels so good, so comforting…

Satoru watches with a small smile as your lids grow heavy and finally close, your breath leaving your mouth evenly.

“As long as I’m the one holding you, no nightmare in the world will dare to wake you up, babe”, he breathes against your ear, holding you tightly in his arms throughout the whole night.

Inumaki Toge

You stare at the full moon blankly, mind racing. How are you supposed to get out of this alive? Are you even strong enough to lead your very own mission without someone by your side? This will be the first time you’ll be completely on your own. Without Maki, without Panda, without Toge…You trained hard these last months, you know what you’re capable of. But still…

Is it enough?

“Kelp.”

His tender voice rips you out of your poisonous thoughts immediately, glossy eyes shooting up to take in his sight. Why does he have to look so delicate with the moonlight highlighting his features? Why does his mouth have to be so damn captivating?

Why is it so easy to fall hopelessly in love with Toge Inumaki?

“Sorry, I thought y’all were asleep”, you explain visibly uncomfortably.

How embarrassing, getting caught by your crush while silently crying into the night about a damn mission. A silent yawning escapes your lips before you can stop it, tired eyes covered by a curtain of tears. God, you are so tired.

“Salmon roe.”

Before you even comprehend what’s happening, the white-haired boy takes his hand into yours gently, staring at you so intensely that you forget how to breathe for a moment. It’s like he wants to tell you that everything will be alright, that you have nothing to worry about.

“I don’t think I can do this alone, Toge. I don’t think I’m strong enough to do this…”, you finally give in.

“Bonito flakes”, he immediately replies.

Without thinking twice, he takes out a small notepad and begins to write frantically. You know he always carries a writing block with him for time that require more than a few words, more than gestures are able to say.

“Don’t be so hard on yourself, you worked hard these last weeks. And you’re great! Just do as good as you always do, I’m counting on you, (y/n)! Please try to get some sleep now :)”

With every word you read your heart beats a little faster, with every word your grin grows a little wider. If he only knew how much his words truly mean to you…

“So you really think I can do it on my own?”, you question.

“Salmon!”

“Thank you, Toge”, you mutter touched.

You don’t know why, but suddenly your eyes start to burn in tears. Toge holds nothing but affection in his gaze, hand still resting on yours while squeezing it ever so slightly. He truly believes in you and your abilities, shows no doubt in your save return. Maybe…maybe you’re actually able to do this. Maybe you are indeed ready for your first solo mission.

Toge stands up again, signalling you with a gentle squeeze to stand up as well. You follow him through the dark hallways of Jujutsu High, right into the dorm you know so well.

“Tuna”, he whispers into the night before pressing you against his warm chest.

You feel as light as a feather, too stunned to speak by the way his arms feel wrapped around your body. He smells intoxicating, so good that you can’t help but sniff in and out. Is this really the first time Toge Inumaki hugged you for more than 10 seconds? It definitely is hard to let him go again.

“I believe in you, (y/n).”

Did he…Did he just speak?

“Toge…”, you breathe out, watching as his smile grows even wider.

With a last wave, he is gone in the darkness of the night, leaving you standing in the middle of your room on your own with your feelings scattered all over the place. Toge Inumaki just hugged you. No, Toge INumaki just spoke. He told you that he believes in you.

“How am I supposed to sleep now?”, you mumble to yourself.

Fushiguro Megumi

Your eyes snap open in an instant, ice cold sweat running down your face. Where are you? Is it over? You…

You breathe out. It was a nightmare. Again.

“Fuck”, you hiss to yourself while rubbing your aching head.

Why do you have to get haunted by these horrible nightmares, when will it finally stop? Even Gojo-sensei seems to be clueless about your condition, about what keeps you up each and every night.

But you know something that will help you to get through this night. Or rather someone.

Your bare feet stick to the wooden floor ever so slightly while you wander through the dark hallways on your way to his doorstep. Is he even awake? Maybe he won’t open the door at all.

Little do you know that Megumi sits in his bed with his eyes wide open, staring at the door knob in sheer excitement for your return into his arms. He knows it doesn’t mean much to you and at the beginning, it didn’t mean anything to him either. You just came into his room from time to time, searching for comfort in his hug to chase your nightmares away. And since you were friends, Megumi had nothing against stroking your head gently and wrapping his arms around you.

But something seems different now. Something about the sensation of you visiting him late at night sends shivers down his spine, your moonlit features let his heart hammer against his ribcage. It’s like he wants to hold you even closer, wants your breath to brush against his face. Why does it dawn to him how delicate your curves look and how soft your hair feels? There is no use in denying it, no sense in fighting against the obvious.

Megumi Fushiguro has fallen hopelessly in love with you.

The knocks against his wooden floor send him to his door straight away, opening it before you’re able to think twice.

“Oh, I didn’t knew you were still awake, Fushiguro”, you mutter into the darkness.

God, how much he hates the fact that you always call him by his last name. What would he give to hear his name out of your mouth once?

“What do you want here, (y/n)?”

His voice sounds harsher than anticipated while it takes all his strength to not swallow you in his arms immediately.

“I had a bad dream again…”

The vulnerable tone of your voice kills him from the inside. Without saying another word, he steps aside, allows you to enter his dorm without hesitation. You position yourself on the left side of his bed like you always do, hiding yourself in his already warm sheets. Without hesitation, he crawls back into his bed, inviting you into his arms with a long breath.

You smell as good as you always do. Why did it take him so long to realize that you smell absolutely intoxicating, that the mixture of your shampoo, body scent and perfume is addictive? Maybe he should tell you about the way he feels, finally confess how you make his heart beat out of his chest. But how would you react?

Would you…reject him? For all these years of knowing each other, you were never more than friends. Good buddies, pals, but not more than that. None of you ever crossed the line of plain cuddling each other to sleep. Not once did your lips brush over his, not once did your hands move further than his chest. Would you even love him back?

“Come on, you have to have a crush (y/n)! Is it Chris Pine, Tom Holland? Are you more into Korean guys?”, Nobara inquired over and over.

You just rolled your eyes with a playful grin, almost making Megumi fall out of his chair next to Yuji.

“I don’t have a crush on anyone. I’m perfectly fine by myself”, you insisted.

“I like tall woman with a big ass”, Yuji interrupted out of nowhere, gaining a punch in his face by Nobara.

That was it, the first time he noticed something strange. The way his heart suddenly grew heavier than metal, sunk into his chest, took his breath away. He was hurt by your words. Megumi Fushiguro was hurt by the stinging fact that you didn’t say his name like he secretly hoped for, that your eyes didn’t even flinch towards him for the split of a second.

“Hey, are you alright? Why did you tense up like that?”, you mutter against his chest while drawing circles onto his t-shirt with your delicate fingertip.

“Oh, it’s nothing for you to worry about”, he lies into this tender night.

He presses you against his own body a little tighter, watches how your eyes grow heavy with every passing minute that you listen to his steady heartbeat. This shouldn’t mean more to him than comforting an old friend, it shouldn’t make his heart flutter and palms sweaty. But the soft snores leaving your mouth sound oh so lovely, the way your eyes move behind closed lids makes his heart skip a beat. You have to be the most precious creature on this earth, so valuable that he never wants to let you go again.

Until he has in the morning. Until you return back into his arms when nightmares keep you up another night.

Thank you so much for reading! Tags: @arehzhera @ploylulla @tzubaki @beatrexworld @dazaisdick @hellkaiserinphoenix  @lauv4chuuya @shadowfoxey @sindela @kayleegomez @sunshine7queen @magalimachete @gatitam @idontknow1123 @creative1writings @sanicsmut  @mynahx3 @sad-darksoul@chilichopsticks @hellkaiserinphoenix @chuyasthighs0 @ynackerman9499 @keepghostly   @froufrousnowman @tomiokathedepresso  @gojosrealwife  @coffeeluvr96 @mahi-tamashi @weebotaku21 @chaoticwinnercupcake @lees-chaotic-brain  @risuola  @sugurulefttesticle @wordskeeper @baku2345 @polarbvnny @ruixrei @bam-bam-bam-bame-blog @lavenderdrxp @localhehecat @alicerhr @kayleegomez @belovedvamp @wifenanami @dlwlrmas-world @oikawarz @darkstarlight82 @aeliusbbg

[xhoneygirlxx]

because work has been kicking my ass and i'm a wh*re for virgin Eddie, here is this small little blurb as a treat :)

virgin!eddie x reader (reader and Eddie are both in their 20s)

rated r: smut, oral receiving, swearing, mentions of sex. (18+ minors GO AWAY)

You and Eddie sit on the small couch in his trailer living room, the blue glow from the tv highlighting him in the most beautiful way. The eerie music of Halloween plays through the tinny speakers, the soundtrack of your night. Although the metal head has watched this movie more than he can count, you can’t help but notice your best friend has become instantly tense the moment Lynda’s tits appear on screen.

Eddie’s virginity wasn’t a secret in your friendship, he’d constantly asked you for advice on how to please his partner when the day finally came, but watching him squirm in his seat at glimpse of bare tits makes your heart melt. To be completely honest you had a crush on your bestie for as long as you can remember, to be fair who wouldn’t? You’ve thought about him a few times when your hands were in between your legs, fingers pumping in and out of your sopping cunt.

You’ve thought about offering taking Eddie’s virginity but you would hate to take something so special from him especially when it should be with someone he loves. So you kept your offer to yourself, helped him with any advice he’d asked, and remained supportive in his search of a partner.

The continuous bounce of Eddie’s knee pulls your attention from the screen, too entertained by his constant fidgeting. The scene that got him so riled up as now ended with the pretty blonde being killed but his growing length beneath his jeans continues to strain against the unforgiving material.

Even though it’s selfish and you’re dying to know what he hides beneath his pants, you give in and ask him the one thing you’ve been dying to ever since the two of you turned eighteen.

“Eds, are you good?” Leaning forward, you curl your legs underneath your bum.

His head snaps towards you, eyes bugged out and cheeks flushed. “M-me? Yeah I’m fine, m’good.”

Eddie nods his head slowly, not only trying to convince you of his words but also himself. Your face falls, mouth pulling into a straight line clearly unamused by his horrible acting.

“Okay let’s try this again but this time tell me the truth,” You say sternly, “are you good?”

Letting his head fall to the back of the couch, Eddie closed his eyes and lets out a harsh breath. “I’m just, the movie it’s,”

The nervousness in his voice won’t let him finish his sentence, every thought in his brain melting together in a bowl of mumbo jumbo.

Placing your hand on his thigh, a little higher than usual, you look up at him from under your lashes. “Her tits got you all hot and bothered, is that it?”

Snapping his eyes open down at you, he stares at you as you spoke in a completely different language. Having too much fun with his blush intensifying, you lean forward just a bit more putting your cleavage on display.

“It hurts, huh? Feels like you’re gonna burst at any moment.” Your voice is sweet like sugar, dripping with an intoxicating amount of intensity that Eddie’s never heard.

His hands that sit by his sides clench and unclench, jitters pouring through him at an alarming rate. Too dumb to speak he nods, curls bouncing with every motion.

“Awe baby, s’okay,” you coo as you hook your legs over his thighs, “if you want I can make it all better. Want me to kiss it better?”

Eddie stares at you unblinkingly, mouth parted slightly in awe. Again he nods but this time you tsk at him, shaking your head back and forth in disapproval.

“I asked you a question, honey, I need your words. Do you want me to make it better?” You pout your lips at him and he swallows harshly.

“Please make it better, hurts s’bad.” He slurs, already drunk off your touch without even really feeling it just yet.

“Such a good boy begging me so nicely.”

Slowly you move forward, capturing his soft lips into a needy kiss. Despite being a virgin Eddie does a good job kissing you, not going overboard with too much tongue or sloppy movements.

Taking a chance and wanting to take care of the growing pulse that grows in between your thighs, you begin to rock hesitantly over his hard length. The intense spark you feel jolting through your veins is verbalized with the wanton moan that rips from Eddie’s throat and vibrates into your mouth.

Picking up your momentum you can’t help but roll your eyes into the back of your head, the rough material of his jeans adding extra intensity to your pulsing bundle of nerves. Eddie isn't any better, his face is flushed red, bangs sticking to his forehead due to the amount of sweat that beads from his hairline, and his chest rattles from all the moaning sobs that leave his open mouth.

Opening your eyes you can't help but snort at Eddie's awkward hand placement. They hang in the air, itching to grasp at something but too nervous to give into the temptation.

Letting your hips come to a complete stop, you gently cup his cheeks in the palm of your hand. Hazy eyes open and look right at you, a thousand tiny specks of glitter shimmer in the big brown pools, sweeping you right into his vortex.

"Eddie honey, do you want to touch me?" Despite the dryness that lingers in your mouth, your words drip and saturate the boy beneath you in love and care.

"If that's okay with you, I don't want to make you uncomfortable or anything. So like if you don't want me to I won't-" You stop his rambles with a quick kiss to his lips.

Pulling away with a small giggle you look at him the same way he's looking at you, disgustingly in awe.

"I want you to touch me, Eddie. Bet your hands would feel so nice on me, so big and strong."

With the thought of it makes your underwear even wetter, so wet that you know when you get off his lap there will be a big wet stain. Not wanting to wait any longer you pull your shirt over your head, revealing the pretty white lace bra that holds your breast into place.

Eddie looks something like a fish, opening and closing his mouth with unspoken words that get caught in his throat. Although it's funny watching your best friend so speechless, you can't help but adore his childlike wonder.

Gripping his wrists in your hand and pull them towards you placing them on your tits, squeezing his fingers around the doughy flesh causing you to hiss in satisfaction.

"F-fuck you're so hot." It's breathless when it comes out.

Eddie follows your lead, fondling your round breasts in the palms of his big hands. The feeling of his grip causes you to resume your motions, grinding harder on his lap trying to relieve the hammering thump in between your legs.

You remember in the fog of your lust that this wasn't about you, it was in fact about your best friend who is currently trying to hold himself together.

Again you stop your movements, pulling his hands from your lace covered chest, and move from his lap.

"W-wait, what's- what are you doing?" Eddie is more than frantic, he's completely distraught with the absence of your weight on his legs.

Pinching his cheek sweetly, you push his legs apart to create enough room for yourself. Sinking to your knees, you move into the space you've created for yourself.

"I'm doing what I said I was going to do, I'm going to kiss it better." You drag your nails up his jean covered thighs, gazing up at him with doe eyes acting as if you aren't making one of his dreams come true.

"Yeah yeah, fuck okay." Babbling like an idiot, Eddie stares at you completely shocked as if you didn't promise this to him earlier.

Raising your eyebrows at him, you wait for him to catch on to what you're waiting for. It doesn't hit him until you clear your throat and point at the handcuff belt that hold his jeans in place.

"Oh shit, right. Let me just get these off." Going as fast as his shaking hands will allow him, he goes to undo his belt and push his pants just below his balls.

His cock bounces from their confines, hitting his tee shirt covered navel with a small thud. You can't help but gawk at the sight of him. Eddie's packing more than you ever imagined, long and thick with a prominent vein running along the underside. The tip is a pretty pink shade that shines from the pearls of precum that dripples from the slit.

Your mouth fills with saliva just from the sight alone. The dark brown thatch of curls that sit at the base match the hair on his heavy balls. You weren't someone who found genitalia appetizing but man oh man was did your best friend's look good enough to eat.

The small silence that settled between you two has clearly made Eddie anxious. His chocolate brown eyes look anywhere but you and the thick chunky rings that sit on his fingers have become his clear fascination, twisting them around and around his thick digits.

Not wanting him to sit with his thoughts any longer, you lean up enough to capture his kiss bitten lips in a passionate kiss. This time it's all teeth and tongue, spit swapping between the two of you.

When you both pull away you wish you could continue kissing him, fuck the oxygen that you need all you want is Eddie.

Sitting back down on your knees, you let spit dripple down onto his stiff shaft. Clasping your hand around him you begin to jerk him off slowly, not wanting the moment to be over fast.

Eddie on the other hand is fighting for his life, lip pulled between his teeth and his eyebrows pinching together. You drink it up like a plant in the middle of a drought.

"You're s'pretty, Eds and your cock, fuck it's so pretty too." You coo, to prove your point you press kisses up and down his length.

"Mmm s-shit, your ha- your hand feels so good." Eddie's voice is completely strained, his jugular vein pocking out every once and a while.

It doesn't take a rocket scientist to know that Eddie's nearing the end, the shaking and tensing of his thighs a clear sign. Wanting him to experience it all, you envelope the tip of his cock into your mouth, swirling your tongue around it and licking along the slit to collect the salty bead of pre that beads out of it.

Moving your mouth lower, you take him halfway into your mouth and allow your hand to jerk off whatever you can't take. The hand that braces itself on his thigh snakes its way to the heavy sack that sits just below his cock, kneading it in the palm of your hand gently.

Without needing instruction Eddie's hand finds it's way to your head, gripping your hair at the scalp and pulling out it with vigor. The pain and arousal that sparks within you causes you to moan around him, making him sob out in ecstasy.

"F-uh, oh don't stop I'm gonna- shit I'm gonna cum!"

Moving your head as fast as you can, you move to the tip to avoid chocking on the salty release. Still pumping your hand up and down on his cock you collect his warm seed in your mouth, letting it pool on your tongue.

Above you Eddie is a screaming mess, blabbing nonsense and groaning loudly. To no one's surprise Eddie cums and he cums a lot, so much so that it starts to dripple out the sides of your mouth with the string of your spit.

Once his breath returns to his lungs and his grip loosens on your hair, you let him fall out of your mouth with a lewd pop. When your eyes make eye contact with his own, you open your mouth to show him the pearly white of his release that sits on your pink tongue. Closing your mouth and swallowing it with a loud hum, you open your eyes to see Eddie completely gobsmack.

"Jesus sweetheart, you can't do shit like that unless you want me to get hard again." He says with an airy laugh.

You take his words as a threat, one that you'd be stupid not to take with the way your pussy flutters in need.

"Who said I was done, Munson?"

[neonoddeye]

Save room for us | Sanji x GN! Reader

The Sanji brain rot has been so intense lately, I had to do something about it! The fic is named after a song from one of my favorite albums ever by Tinashe, btw (you should listen to it).

CONTENT WARNINGS: kinda angsty but with a whole lot of comfort, takes place right after the events of whole cake

Heart goes numb

Perched at the edge of your seat in the aquarium, you awaited Sanji, five minutes before the agreed upon time. When the crew finally set sail from Whole Cake with the beloved cook and the crew got a chance to catch sleep, you caught Sanji after breakfast, stating bluntly that “we need to talk after dinner tonight.” You felt bad for stating the invitation in such a sinister tone, especially after the nightmare Sanji just emerged from, but your emotions got the best of you. The numbness shielding your heart was thawing away, and you couldn’t stand the pain of hiding your feelings for Sanji any longer.

These nights don’t get easier when I see you with her

A light knock on the door pulled you out of your running thoughts, and the man of the hour stepped in, holding a plate of your favorite snack and a cup of tea.

“I noticed you gave most of your food to Luffy at dinner, so I made you something.” You can hear the apprehension dripping from his words, and your heart aches knowing you worried the poor man.

“Thank you, Sanji,” you reply weakly, avoiding eye contact with him out of guilt as you speak. “I’m sorry I didn’t eat that much, the food tasted great. I just… didn’t have an appetite.”

“That’s okay, don’t worry!” Sanji assures you as he places the food and tea down gently next to you. “Tell me, what are you worried about? Is there something you need to tell me?” He takes a seat next to you, giving you more personal space than usual, and you finally look up at him, your eyes threatening to well up with tears as you see his beautiful blue eyes full of concern for you.

“Sanji I-“ you start, then take a shaky, deep breath. “I didn’t mean to worry you so much when I said we need to talk. I’m not mad at you, I promise. You’ve been through a lot these past few days, and I’m really happy to have you back. I missed you.” Your words are fragile and wavering as you try to avoid telling him your true feelings.

“There’s no need to apologize, y/n, I know you didn’t mean to worry me. I missed you too, and I’m really happy to be back-“

“No, Sanji,” you interrupt him, feeling the dam of emotion slowly break free with every word shared between you too. “I really missed you, it was painful without you around.” Your voice picks up a little bit, and you look him square in the eyes, finally gathering up the courage to spill your every thought. “I was so worried about you, getting married to some girl you don’t even know and seeing your awful family hurt me too. But, the more I spent time away from you, the more I realized it was more than just friendly concern.”

Sanji’s eyebrows furrowed in concern. “What do you mean?”

“I mean…” you sigh, and turn your body to completely face Sanji. “God dammit, Sanji, I like you. I mean I have feelings for you, and it hurt being away from you, and I know it sounds so fucking selfish but it hurt when I saw you with Pudding. Seeing her fawn over you was agonizing. I know you drool over every girl, I don’t care about that, but I was afraid the two of you actually had something special. It made me realize that I want something special with you, Sanji.” You sharply inhale at the end of your confession, not realizing you forgot to breathe between your words.

She will never love you, oh, the way that I do

Sanji’s eyes widen, and the two of you stare at each other in shock of your words as he begins to process. After a solid 30 seconds, he exhales, then gently pulls you into his chest for a hug, his long arms holding you as if you were made of porcelain.

“Honey, you should have said something before,” Sanji whispers, his chin resting on the top of your head. “I’m so, so sorry I was hurting you this whole time.” You can hear him begin to choke up. “If-if I had known-“

“It’s okay, Sanji, I’m not upset with you, I didn’t intend on coming across that way.” You look up from his chest, and your heart stings at the sight of tears welling up in his eyes. “You didn’t have a choice, I knew that. I’m so happy you’re here with us. I’d go through all of that again if it means I get to be here with you every time.”

You’ll come back for us, someday

Sanji brings his hand to your cheek, delicately wiping away a tear you didn’t even notice came out with his thumb. He’s disregarding his own tears, smiling down at you with true warmth and contentment.

“Is it too early to say I love you? Because I really, really do. I’ve wanted to be with you ever since you joined us. I know it’s difficult for me to show that to you right now, so will you be mine? So I can continue to show you how much I love you?”

“I’d want nothing more.”

The last thing you see is your new boyfriend grinning ear to ear before he squeezes you into his chest, breaking any sort of tension that was previously between you two. The happiness is radiating from him like morning sunlight, grazing your skin and making you feel warmth for the first time in days. Tears of happiness and relief flood out of you, and mumble out an apology into his chest for dampening his shirt. He doesn’t have a care in the world. Once you break free of him to catch your breath, you gasp slightly, noticing how close your face is to his. He’s still holding you by the waist, and you can feel his shallow breaths against your face as he keeps you close. You then notice he’s staring at your lips, and in an act of newfound bravery, you place your hands around his neck and close the distance. His lips meet yours with the same gentle care that he holds you, and you both linger for a moment, basking in the sensation and bliss of contact you both craved for so long. He pulls away, only to give you a forehead kiss, lingering a bit longer into the warmth of your skin. When you get a chance to look back up at him, you swear you can see hearts in his eyes.

“Sorry, I couldn’t wait any longer,” you whisper, feeling your cheeks and ears paint themselves red with bashfulness.

“Never apologize for that. Please do that more often, actually.” You swear you can see blood begin to trickle out of his nose, and you giggle. You can absolutely tell that Sanji is truly in love with you.

“Oh! The food! I can’t waste this, would you stay here with me while I eat?” You ask Sanji, much more lighthearted than before.

“My love, could I stay with you for the whole night?”

“Please do.”

The two of you talk about everything and nothing as you eat your late night snack made by him, all the while basking in the relief of finally being with one another. Truly, you’d go through every fight on that god forsaken island again if it meant you’d be in Sanji’s arms.

‘Cause we were built in dreams of gold

(Just save room for us)

[bpdetrimental]

I recently reconnected with the girl of my dreams who I’ve loved since I was 16; she was my first everything and I was her first everything. I’m bisexual and I helped her learn who she is.

I left my previous partner for her, and everything was perfect and fine until I recently had a meltdown about two weeks ago. I was selfish and not taking account of what she was/is going through. Since I was “normal” with her, I didn’t expect her to become my fp…but naturally she did when I came to my parents house. She said she wanted to marry me before I came here. She hasn’t been able to give me the attention my stupid brain thinks it deserves. So naturally I do the thing where I spam text her and freak out and make her feel really bad and feel like she isn’t enough. We haven’t spoken in almost a week and it’s killing me. She either leaves me on read or doesn’t even read my messages.

I am terrified I pushed her away and the “real me” slipped out and scared her, as I did not have these feelings when we were together in person. For several months I didn’t have this go on. It’s been years since I’ve had a meltdown this bad. She knows I’m bipolar but I haven’t told her about my BPD. I’ve gone from angry to understanding to sad and talked about suic1de a lot, and I know that scared her.

She said she we both needed to heal and work on ourselves two weeks ago and that’s what sent me to spiral I think. I’m not sure what to do and I feel like the girl I’ve loved for so long is now too annoyed and overwhelmed to talk to me, or even want to be with me anymore. I gave up everything so I could have a chance to be with her and she’s always said she loved me and wanted to be with me, she said we felt the same. And I feel like I ruined it.

My friends say I need to give her space but when I get bad I spam text. How do I handle this situation? Please help. I feel awful and I don’t want to lose her.

A situation like this can be especially difficult to handle. From a rational perspective, she is entirely in her right to feel that way, seeing as you mentioned you made her feel really bad and as if she isn’t enough. There, you may have messed up quite a bit. On her end, she may be doubting the feelings you have with her, and seeing you spam her may come across as you regretting having done it for selfish reasons.

This is why I really think you should be open and honest with her. To be vulnerable and to expose yourself is not something to be taken lightly. I know how uncomfortable it can be, to lay your cards out all on the table and allow them to make their decision.

Do not spam.

Write out your thoughts and gather them first before trying to contact her again. But I believe it’s what’s best to do. Every time I have made irrational decisions with my partner, I had to self reflect and come back to him, telling him my feelings and he helped me find ways we could overcome the problem, or would be reassuring.

Tell her about your bpd, tell her about how you’ve been feeling. But make sure to do it rationally. Try your best to not let your emotions dictate what you’re going to say. We tend to be led by our feelings, and that’s when things come crashing down.

She has told you she’s loved you, that she wants to marry you. Feelings do not fade over night, so I have no doubt she still does. For you to be honest and open with her should not change anything. You are still the same person she fell in love with. The same person who helped her find herself. Sure, you may have messed up. But things like that are bound to happen in a bpd relationship. What’s important is you let her make the choice. If she chooses to, you get the chance to prove yourself.

If you do not have a therapist, find someone trustworthy to talk about your feelings to. That way you do not lash out at her. Make a blog, as I have done, to get your feelings out somewhere. Find time to gather your thoughts, take deep breaths. Think about the core reason as to why you are feeling these emotions towards her and remind yourself that she is not the problem, she didn’t cause your trauma.

She was right, you both have to work on yourselves. But that does not mean she hates you, or that she loves you any less. You need time, find the best ways to cope. And approach her gently. She may be like a wounded lamb, you need a gentle hand to heal her. Do not push her further away.

[rubberduckrobin]

hi there im feelin a bit blue, i wonder if u can do some belphie comfort writing? like when uve just had a terrible day feelin like everything downed on u and u came to him for console :,) hes my favorite character so if u do it tyvm! if u dont thats perfectly ok too!

Hey Anon! Tysm for this request - it means a lot to me! I’m sorry to hear you haven’t been feeling good but I hope you’re doing alright <3

Enjoy the fic! (ﾉ´ヮ`)ﾉ*: ･ﾟ

𝘾𝙤𝙢𝙛𝙤𝙧𝙩.

Fandom: Obey Me!

Pairing: Belphegor x GN!Reader

Type: Fluff, comfort

Word count: Around 1k. (rounded up)

Summary: After a long, difficult day you seek out Belphie for comfort, hoping that you’ll find what was missing from your day, in the warmth of his arms.

AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51474559

TW: Nothing I can think of.

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁ᶻ 𝗓

Prologue:

Please love me. Please tell me you love me. Please tell me you love me and brush my tears away. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆

Part 1: The dark stormy clouds bring satisfied fields of flowers. 

Fortune is something you believe in. And from the moment you woke up, you knew you weren’t on cruel luck's side. 

Even your morning’s dream was a nightmare. Even the little comfort you found in the day’s rainy skies, your favourite type of weather, cannot overcome the underlying feeling of needing something more. 

Needing to let out anger, at the strangers that pushed against you, let out sadness at the loss of the day that could have been productive.

You need something.

Today was awful. Today was a day you wish hadn’t happened. 

But a part of you knows that seeking comfort in Belphegor afterwards is what would make it so…worth it. 

You hate feeling as though you’re taking advantage, and that you shouldn’t want to have such a terrible day just to be able to come to Belphie for help, but his warmth is irresistible, like a blanket in bitter cold. 

This wasn’t the first time you found yourself outside his room, staring blankly at his doorknob, a debate with two sides of your brain, the ‘considerate’ and the ‘selfish’.

Should I knock? Should I leave? 

If he denies your presence, you’ll be left empty, unloved, another reason for wanting the horrible day to end and for the earth to cave in under your feet. 

However, he could also be the one to stop everything; your memories of the people that pushed past you, the lack of effort you put into your work, the torment you endured from family, acquaintances, friends. Everything. Everything that happened.

The doorknob clicks open.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆

Part 2: Security Blanket

As you reach for the door, it opens from the other side.

“Y/N? What are you doing here?”

Your swollen-eyed gaze meets Belphegors and it only takes him a moment to realise what’s happening.

“Another one of those days, huh?”

You can’t respond.

Everything…

“Alright. Come in.”

Everything…

Belphie wraps around you by the waist almost instantaneously, cold hands curling warmly around your stomach; his warmed breath paces against the line of your neck, tickling you gently. 

He runs circles on your back whilst leading you towards his bed. 

“I was just feeling sleepy. I’m glad to have a new pillow.”

Still holding your hand, he gets under his duvet, ushering you in with soft breaths. 

Everything…

You’re pulled into the comfort of his blanket, and he repositions his arms to be around your torso again, burrowing his head into the crook of your neck. 

“Mm.”

Everything…

“Are you gonna tell me what happened?” he asks, in nothing more than a whisper.

“It’s just…not a good day today.”

“Alright…do you want to stay here with me? Like this?”

“…yes.”

Everything.

Time stops. Memories stop. 

It’s only you and him. 

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆

Part 3: As gentle as mournful melodies tribute to joy. 

He begins to hum, the vibrations running down your aching body. 

The song is not one you know, but it provides a sense of familiarity. It’s similar to the feeling of completing something small, like a puzzle, or something big, like your day. 

As he runs his hands through your hair, you find your mind to be indulged in nothing but the sensation. The feeling of his fingers winding their way through each strand, the pause when he goes to start from your scalp again.

You feel pampered.

Everything.

Through newfound drowsy thoughts, you begin to speak.

“Everything today was just so…”

Before you can find the word to complete it, he speaks.

“Difficult? …mm…”

“Like the world was…”

“…Against you?”

“No. More like…crashing in on me. But yeah, that too.”

“Okay. It’s okay. That’s life…”

“Life sucks then.”

“Yeah…it really does.”

Everything.

“…what can make it better?”

“I don’t know.”

“…is there anything I can do?”

“I don’t know.”

“Alright. Do you want to sleep? …Or talk?”

 “I don’t…”

“Know?” His laughs are muffled against your body and your heart just melts - you’re so lucky to have him.

It’s unusual how you aren’t anything more than friends, but you are together as though more. His tenderness as he holds you seems more than just what you are labelled. 

“Hey, Belphie?”

“Hmm?”

“Don’t you think its weird to be like…this? You know…”

“Huh? Oh. No? You were upset. And you looked exhausted. I don’t see a problem with this.”

“Don’t you think this is something for couples?”

“No. But…”

“But?”

“It’s nothing, go to sleep. You’re tired.”

Nothing more is needed to be said, and nothing more is to be done, aside from you just staying in his arms as you dream.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆

Part 4: Dreams.

I dream of idle moments in your arms. The weight of your body against mine. The sink of my heart before the flutter. The stars in the sky as you watch with glistening eyes.

I think of how stupid this is, how stupid this all is. How ridiculous it is to think such romanticised thoughts.

Then I think of you.

Everything stops and all there is is my heartbeat against yours. 

Nothing less, nothing more.

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁ᶻ 𝗓

End Author’s Note: I hope you enjoyed it! To whoever is reading this: please be kind to yourself and have a great day/night! :)

[dominimoonbeam]

Totally Normal Meet Cute Script - Part 2

warnings: it's not a normal meet cute script at all... it's a slasher. you're in a slasher. Happy Halloween!

Performed by Jouska over on his youtube and his patreon!

Part 2 - Slasher 101

[muffled hallway sounds]

Good morning, glasses.

[walking the halls together, background sounds, rain outside or muffled voices.]

Aw, you always look so grumpy in the morning… Here’s your coffee.

What do you do on days when your first class isn’t with me?

I know I don’t have to bring you coffee every time… But I’m picking up mine on the way so, why wouldn’t I grab yours? I’ve filled like two punch cards this month because of us.

Really, it’s selfish on my part. I need that brain of yours sharp, study buddy.

You—Wait, really? [smiling] You got me a muffin?

[bag crinkle] Cranberry orange? [pretends to choke up] Glasses, you sentimental softy! You do like me!

No, no, you can’t have it back. It’s mine and I will cherish every crumb.

[pause]

[smiling] Ouch. Drink your coffee. You always like me more after your first coffee.

What?

[serious] I can’t believe they still haven’t figured out what happened to that girl… Or arrested someone. Yeah, a guy in my building disappeared last week. No, it’s probably a prank. Everyone is so freaked out and they still haven’t found that couple from last month. If they ran off, someone should have heard from them by now, right?

I heard a theory that maybe the couple had something to do with Casey’s murder and made a run for it. I don’t know. It sounds like a stretch, doesn’t it? Why would they run when it doesn’t seem like the cops have made any connections. They hadn’t even found her body when the couple disappeared.

[stop walking]

Hm? A note on the door?

If class was canceled why not send a text? I could have slept in or we could have gone to breakfast. Oh… glasses, we can still go to breakfast. There’s a diner not far from— Why are you opening the door? The note says we’re free!

[laughing] Checking for assignments? If we have any assignments I’m sure we’ll get an email or…

[door opening, walking in]

Okay, yeah, the note on the door is pretty old school so why not—

Oh fuck! [dropping coffee and grabbing listener]

Don’t look. No, trust me.

It’s… It’s bad. Just… We’re backing out of the room. Okay, glasses? I’ve got you, just, walk with me.

[door closing, hall sounds] Okay. Okay, you can open your eyes. I’m sorry I grabbed you like that but… I didn’t want you to see that. It was…bad. Fuck. We… We have to get someone.

It was… Oh, god, I think it was that couple… They were propped up in the seats at the back of the room. Shit. Shit. Shit. Who the fuck would…

What? No, I’m not going to leave you here to guard the door. Someone… [whispers] Glasses, someone killed them and put them there. They weren’t…fresh.

I’ll stay here and make sure no one else goes in. You go find someone, okay?

Wait!

No. No, don’t.

I know it was my idea! But it was a bad one.

Because someone did that and they might not be far and… people disappear, remember? Casey was between classes and the couple was walking to the cafeteria when they vanished. I’m not going to send you off by yourself.

No, I’m calling the police. You can call the office and tell someone there.

What? Oh, your hand. Sorry, yeah, there you go, just don’t run off. I will chase you, glasses, and we both know you can’t outrun me.

Of course, joking would be inappropriate right now. Luckily, I’m not joking. I would sooner tackle you than let you out of my sight right now.

Thank you.

It’s ringing…

[on the phone] Hi. I… I think we found some bodies… Yeah, like the dead kind.

[sound fade]

-

[dorm room, maybe rain patter outside or low music]

[sounds of someone writing or typing]

[knocking]

[stops writing]

[knocking]

[glasses hesitates to answer]

[whisper yelling through the door] Glasses! Open up! [knocking]

[unlocks and opens door]

Oh, thank god. Let me in?

[smiling] Really? Why? Because I ran through the rain with all my worldly possessions to your doorstep. Have mercy!

Please, glasses. My whole dorm building got closed down. It’s a crime scene, I guess. They kicked everyone out.

I was going to crash at this other friends, but he’s already got three guys from my building sleeping there and I don’t want to be in that dogpile.

Please? Pleasepleaseplease?

I know you don’t have a roommate. I won’t get in your way. I’ll camp out on the floor. I’m great at camping. My dad used to take me on these weeklong trips in the woods.

[door opening wide]

Yay! Thank you! I promise, you won’t even notice I’m here.

[door closing and locking]

You are my savior! I owe you!

So, this is your room… Nice. This is bigger than I thought. Look at all this floor space, glasses. And you have a fluffy rug. It’s like it was meant to be.

Huh? Oh, the crime scene… Yeah they… they found the missing guy from my building. After what we found in the classroom the other day, I guess the cops were doing a more thorough search of the whole campus with… [winces] cadaver dogs. They found him in one of the basement storage rooms…

I don’t know. I didn’t see it and they weren’t telling us more than that when they kicked us out of the building. I think they want to search all our rooms, like they think it was a student that did it.

I got out of there with my shit before they could start doing bag checks on the way out.

Because I was hoping to find a place to crash before everyone else I know. Somehow those guys were still ahead of me…

Well, no, you weren’t my first choice.

[laughs] Don’t take offense! As much as you think that irritating you is my favorite hobby, it’s not. I’m trying to make you like me and hanging my wet hoodie on your door and snoring on your floor isn’t exactly the smartest move. …Although, getting to show you how I look shirtless and how cute I am when I wake up could be exactly what we need.

Maybe this was for the best.

No, not the murders, I’m not a monster. I meant my other friend’s floor space being filled.

By the way, cute pajamas. If I’d known we were having a slumber party, I would have at least worn something matching… I was in bed when they started kicking us out.

I think a bunch of them are bunking in the library.

[laughs] That does not sound like fun! It sounds drafty and creepy.

I would much rather sleep on your floor. Speaking of… do you have an extra blanket?

Perfect, thanks. [gasps] And a pillow? You really know how to treat a guy…

You even have a mini fridge and a microwave in here! Oh, we’re set. [pause] Is…Glasses, is that a nightlight?

Don’t hide it! It’s too late. I already saw it. And it was shaped like the moon!

No, it’s adorable! Leave the nightlight in.

Wait, you’re still studying? Shit, I thought for sure I’d be waking you up. No wonder you’re always such a grump in the morning. What time is your first class tomorrow? You know, assuming they don’t cancel those too.

My first class isn’t until ten, but I get up around seven to go for a run. Do you want to come with?

[laughs] I’ll take that look as a tentative maybe…

[settling in] This actually isn’t bad…

[glasses getting into bed. Light flicking off]

It’s a cute nightlight.

Don’t worry, glasses. I’m sure it’ll just be for one night. [yawns] But, you know, now that I know where you are and that you have your own microwave that doesn’t smell like someone’s overcooked tuna, I’ll probably be over more often.

[pause. falling asleep]

Hm? [serious. quiet] I didn’t really know him. I think he lived on the first floor but I’m not sure we ever met. …Do you think it’s really a serial killer like everyone is saying? I don’t think they’ve been able to find any connection between the victims. It’s like it’s just random.

No, you’re right. Somehow that’s scarier.

I don’t know. Some of my classes have already switched to online this week. I guess they could close the campus and send us home… Where’s home for you, glasses?

That’s far away.

Um… My dad had a place upstate.

No, I wouldn’t go home if they closed the campus.

I don’t know. Maybe I’ll crash with some friends in the city and wait it out? I mean, if there’s no one left on campus then our serial killer will have to branch out too, right?

What about you? Would you go home?

You could stick with me… Worst case scenario, we take that road trip we talked about.

[smiles] Okay, that road trip I talked about.

Really? You’ll consider it? Oh, glasses, you’re really into me now. [joking] It’s kind of embarrassing… You were so tough and mean when we started talking.

[laughs quietly] Okay, okay, I’m shutting up.

Good night, softy.

[stretch of muffled storm sounds]

[waking up. groggy] Glasses?

Did you turn out your nightlight?

[lamp switch flicking]

The power?

[muffled distant screams]

Yeah, I heard it.

[thump on the door]

[getting on the bed with listener]

[whispers] Shh, it’s okay. I’m right here.

No, hang on. It’s probably a prank. Those are the same screams you hear in the gymnasium when the lights go out. Some of the assholes from my building probably messed with the power in yours to scare people.

No, we’re not checking. We’re going to sit right here and just give it a minute.

Because even if it’s some guys being jerks, there is an actual killer out there somewhere and you are not going out there in the dark. It’s like, Slasher 101, glasses.

Shh, I know it’s dark.

No, don’t turn the light on on your phone.

Because… [sighs, still whispering] Because if there is someone creeping around in the hall, they might see it shine under the door.

Yeah, you can hang onto me. It’s going to be okay. We’ll just—

See, the light’s back on.

[laughter muffled through the halls]

[muffled voices in the hall outside] You guys are assholes! Go to sleep! That’s not funny!

[exhales a nervous laugh] See? Told you.

Yeah, I’ll admit, I’ve been with the assholes playing pranks enough times to see one coming…

Hey… Were you crying?

Oh, shit, glasses. No, it’s okay. Here, let me clean you up. You’re okay.

Yeah, just take a few deep breaths. I’ve got you.

Of course, I’m staying. I’ll be right there on the floor.

Stay… You mean on the bed?

Yeah. Sure. Here, lay down. [smiling, trying to lighten the mood] Do you want to be little spoon or big spoon?

[settling in together] Okay?

Yeah, of course I’m good. The only place better than your floor is your bed.

Get some sleep. I’m right here.

[the-cookie-of-doom]

Pregnant Kim anon here again, please know that after I sent that I decided to “warm up” by outlining an entire fic and didn’t get any novel writing done lol. I would love a snippet full of ANGST because I think Kim deserves it right now for what he’s done to my brain

asdfjhagsdjfh VALID! ALL OF THAT IS VALID!

Here is your angst, my darling. I realized I actually don't have a ton of the pregnancy itself written yet, so here's a little bit (lol. it's over 1k, I got carried away) that happens soon after the birth. Kim has horrible post-partum depression thanks to everything that happens in this fic. TW for graphic description of depression and implied suicidal ideation

Chay entered the bedroom to find Kim beneath the covers still, at nearly three in the afternoon. Curled up on his side, tears steadily leaking from the corner of his eye every time he blinked, making a wet spot on the pillow beneath his cheek. He wasn’t even really crying. His eyes were just wet, and that wetness was dripping, and Kim had long since given up on trying to stop it. 

Chay didn’t ask, are you okay? Because he already knew what the answer would be. Instead he climbed onto the bed and spooned up behind Kim, and asked him, “What are you thinking about?”

“It’s not real.”

“What isn’t?”

“This. The depression. All of it. It feels real. It feels awful. But it isn’t. It’s just hormones and chemicals. It’s not me.” Kim didn’t sniffle, or sob, or sigh. His voice didn’t change from the even, monotonous quality it always had when he was trying not to feel. He just breathed. Closed his eyes against a fresh wave of tears, not that it did anything to halt their fall. “I thought once it was over, everything would be okay. I would be free. But it’s never going to stop, is it? There’s no normal for me to go back to. Just this.”

“P’Kim—” Chay’s voice cracked. He swallowed back what sounded like the beginnings of a sob and buried his face in the back of Kim’s neck. Weeks of exposure to Kim’s moods hasn’t made them any easy to handle, not least of all because he knew there’s nothing for him to do. He couldn’t take away this pain. “Please don’t talk like that. It is going to be okay. This isn’t forever. The doctor said it would take at least a month for your medicine to start working—it has to build up in your system, remember? Then everything will be okay.”

Kim didn’t say that the antidepressants only made him feel worse. Blunted him. Blurred any scrap of goodness he could cling too, until it was part of the same empty haze as everything else. He didn’t say that there was no drug strong enough to mask the bone-deep repulsion he felt every time he cradled his daughter to his breast to nurse. Nothing that could make him forget her conception when the pain of her birth was a constant reminder. He didn’t say anything at all. 

Chay squeezed his arm around Kim’s middle, between his aching, swollen breasts, and his aching, swollen incision. Squeezed tight enough that it should have hurt if Kim were capable of feeling anything at all. 

“You’re scaring me, P’Kim,” Chay whispered, holding Kim so tight he could hardly breathe. That was alright. He didn’t need to breathe. 

“I love you, Chay. Thank you for staying with me. I… I’m sorry I didn’t say it sooner. Or that I did, I shouldn’t have—right before—” Before he nearly died. He shouldn’t have said it then. In what he thought were his last moments, he needed Chay to know. But it was selfish to let those be his last words to the boy. 

“Thank you for telling me. I’m glad you did. And I love you, too, P’Kim, so much. You are so, so loved, and someday soon, all of this is going to be better, okay? You just have to hold on until then.” Chay’s voice turned near-manic as it fully dawned on him just what he was bargaining for. “Promise me, Kim. Promise me you won’t leave again.”

“I promise.” A mechanical admission in that dull voice, but no less true. Kim found Chay’s hand where it was pressed over his beating heart and laced their fingers together. 

Kim knew Chay would no doubt tell their brothers about his alarming mood, and they would no doubt take him back to the doctor. He knew about the lists Chay had printed out and hidden away in his desk, spread across three pages and outlining the symptoms of baby blues, postpartum depression, and psychosis, with little checked boxes to track him. He’d filled out nearly half the page for depression before ever leaving the hospital. 

Kim wondered how many ticks he got on the last page before they took him away for good. Before they took his daughter away. Maybe they should; she would no doubt be better off without him. He hadn’t even wanted to keep her. Had nearly bled out moments after meeting her. Maybe it was a sign he wasn’t meant to have her at all. 

“Make sure Kiah’s taken care of,” Kim said softly, his face half-buried in the pillows. “I can’t—I’m not good for her. If I can’t take care of her, you’ll find someone who will, won’t you?” Kim went through too much to bring her into this world, he wouldn’t let her suffer for his own unwillingness to give her up, if that’s what it took to offer a better life. 

Behind him, Chay swallowed thickly. 

“Of course, P’Kim. I’ll make sure she’s always safe and loved.” 

The weight that’s been hung around Kim’s shoulders since he made the decision to bring Kiah home finally lifted, a relief he didn’t know he needed. He sighed and sank back into Chay’s warm embrace, the tension finally melting out of his body, and squeezed the hand still lying over his heart. 

“You’re safe and loved, too,” Chay said. “You have me, and Porsche, and your brothers, and P’Pol, and P’Arm, and P’Big. We’re all going to make sure both of you are safe and loved and taken care of. I won’t leave you alone again, P’Kim. Not ever.”

Kim didn’t doubt it. He never had. All this time, Chay’s love—the love of his family—has been an unwavering presence, cutting through the misery that’s cloaked him these last nine months. Kim didn’t know how to express that to Chay. That there was nothing to worry about. Kim wouldn’t hurt himself, with or without their constant supervision. He didn’t want to. He was only acknowledging the unrelenting misery he felt every waking moment, and accepting that it would likely follow him for the rest of his life. He didn’t prefer it, but he knew it was inevitable that these feelings would continue to be his constant companions. 

However he may feel, Kim knew he owed it to his daughter to be the best father he could be for her. And if his best wasn’t good enough, he would find someone that could give her what she deserved. Even still, Kim appreciated the reassurance. Appreciated Chay, for the way the younger boy has stayed at his side for so long, seen him through so much horror and heartbreak, and would show that appreciation however he could. Even if the most he could do was hold his hand and promise not to leave.

[fanartandfanfiction]

From the diary of Ominis Gaunt

Entry one: There’s a new fifth year. I couldn’t care less but Sebastian won’t shut up about them. Apparently in defense against the dark arts they beat him in a duel rather quickly. Perhaps now his head will shrink enough to fit through the doors.

Entry two: I don’t like the new student. We’ve only spoken a handful of times, but from Sebastian’s stories they seem rather arrogant. They wear the most ridiculous flashy outfits (Sebastian said only they could pull off such a bold look) and show off in battle. Apparently they asked Sebastian to accompany them to Hogsmeade. There was a troll attack and Sebastian went on and on about how brave they were and how they made the troll hit itself with its own club. Tell me that isn’t showmanship. Personally, I wonder how someone four years behind on magic is such an excellent fighter. I think there’s something they’re trying to hide.

Entry three: The absolute AUDACITY of Sebastian never ceases to amaze me. I was going to the undercroft when I heard someone leaving. It was the new student. I asked them how they’d discovered it and they claimed they found it by mistake. I knew they were lying. Sebastian and I got into a heated argument and he said he’d shown them so they had a place to practice their magic. I told him it was not his secret to share. I’m still furious with him.

Entry four: I cannot even put into words how upset I am. Sebastian found out about Salazar Slytherin’s scriptorium and had been begging me to help him. I flat out refused. Then the new fifth year approached me and I’m not sure how they did it, but I agreed to show them the scriptorium. It was just as awful as I’d imagined. We ended up trapped in a room with the remains of Aunt Noctua. As if that wasn’t upsetting enough, the only way to get out was to cast crucio on someone. I wouldn’t do it. Not again, never again. Sebastian said I was being selfish and we would all die because of me. I don’t know what’s gotten into him, but he’s changing. While we argued, the new fifth year interrupted and said Sebastian could cast it on them. I begged them both not to do it. It alarmed me how easily Sebastian was able to cast it. You have to mean it for crucio to work. There was no hesitation. I can still hear the screams of the new student as they were tortured. As soon as the door opened, Sebastian abandoned them to enter the scriptorium. They could barely walk. I helped them to their feet and supported them as we exited the room. Sebastian said he found something exciting but I didn’t care. He could have killed them. This ordeal did make me see them in a different light. They agreed to be tortured to save all our lives. Perhaps I was wrong about them.

Entry five: It appears I’m the only one with a functioning brain. I walked in on Sebastian and the new student having a heated argument. He asked them not to tell me and thankfully, they refused and said I should know. Apparently Sebastian’s discovered a dark magic relic that he thinks will help Anne. And the new student agreed to go with him to find it. I followed them through the catacombs. I was alarmed to hear Sebastian offer to teach them imperio, an unforgivable! I don’t know how he even knows that! Luckily they refused. Sebastian got the relic and wanted to take it with him. I confronted him and we got into another argument. The new student, either the voice of reason or Sebastian’s secret weapon, convinced me to let him go. They said he’d leave with it one way or another and this would be the last time we messed with dark magic. I agreed and let them go. It worries me that Sebastian said he’d leave with it one way or another. I don’t want to think about what his words meant.

Entry six: I’m holding on to my sanity by a thread. So much has happened. I never thought he’d go this far. He killed Solomon. He cast the killing curse with ease. Anne is destroyed. The new student is a wreck. And I…I can’t decide if I’m angry or deeply upset. Perhaps both. I’m grieving for the person Sebastian was. I don’t know how he got so far off the path into this darkness. Could we have done something more to stop him? Could we have saved him from this darkness, saved Solomon’s life? Now we’re left with a gut wrenching decision. I need to meet with them in the undercroft and discuss what we want to do. I’m dreading this conversation.

Entry seven: I am gutted. We decided not to send him to Azkaban. Though he did something horrific, I still love him and can’t imagine him spending the rest of his life in prison. We’re giving him a second chance, though I don’t know if I can ever forgive him. I helped Anne leave. She said she couldn’t be here anymore, couldn’t live in that house. I don’t blame her. I gave her some money and put her on a train. I’m grateful that the new student, though not so new anymore, is by my side. I can’t imagine facing this hardship alone. I don’t know how we proceed from here. Nothing will ever be the same. Hopefully the rest of the school year will be peaceful.

[hollywoodxwhore]

wanted (part 16)

Colson x Original Female Character x Pete

I promise I'm wrapping up!!!! I just can't help myself with these boys!

Warnings: tiny bit of smut, mentions of mental illness/not eating due to mental illness, swearing, mushy feely stuff

I’m physically sick with guilt. 

But maybe it doesn’t even matter. It’s been almost three weeks now since Colson kicked me out of his room. I haven’t talked to Pete, either. I’ve been isolating myself at home, avoiding all of my friends and focusing solely on school and writing. It hurts too much to try to go along with my normal routine knowing Colson isn’t by my side, or even Pete.

I’m on my couch, curled up, watching some reality TV show that I couldn’t care less about. My stomach cramps; I haven’t been eating much. But I just shift positions until it goes away. I’m dozing off when someone knocks on my door. Frowning, I check my phone. 7:14 PM. I get up cautiously and peer through the peephole. My heart seizes in my chest when I see Colson.

I take a deep breath and open the door. I don’t look at him. I’m too terrified of what I’ll see in his eyes. Regret? Anger? Decisiveness? Do I need to prepare for a break-up? Did Pete tell him? 

“Hey,” he says. I’ve missed that voice. Finally, I muster the courage to lift my eyes to his, and my breath hitches. His blue eyes are filled with remorse and anguish, and something else - love. So much love. A sob sneaks out before I can hold it in. “Fuck,” Colson says, stepping forward to wrap me in his arms. I’ve missed him so much and everything is all too much. I cling to him, sobbing, and then, guilt crashes into me. But so does anger. I get that mental illness is serious. I struggle, too. But I didn’t deserve cruelty or neglect. 

I shove him away, harder than I intend to, and then cross my arms, curling in on myself. “You left me,” I mutter. I’m not entirely sure that’s exactly true, but I felt so rejected for almost a month, and it still hurts. 

“I know,” Colson says quietly, looking down at his feet. “I’m so sorry. Alex….”

I sniff and turn around, going to sit on the couch. He takes it as a silent invitation and steps into my apartment, shutting the door behind him. After he takes off his shoes, he sinks into the couch beside me. 

“Alex,” he says after a moment. God, all I want to do is stare at him, rememorize his face. Somehow, his hair seems so much longer. He’s definitely lost weight, which worries me because he was already so thin. But he does seem better. 

“Alex,” Colson repeats, and finally, I look at him. His throat bobs. “I…I can’t control myself when I get like that,” he says slowly. “I don’t even know who I am. All I know is that I want to be alone and wallow in my own misery. I know it hurt you - I know that I hurt you. I am so sorry, baby.”

I sniff and quickly wipe my tears. “That really hurt, Colson,” I say.

“I know,” he says miserably. “I know. But Alex…”

I look at him then, hearing the serious tone of his voice. My brow furrows in curiosity.

Colson wets his lips and sighs, studying my face. “Alex, I love you,” he says finally, and I lose my breath.

It seriously takes me a few long seconds before I can breathe again, and when I do, I suck in a ragged, shaky breath. God dammit. I need to tell him. “Colson-”

“You don’t have to say it back,” Colson says. “But I mean it. I felt it before all this, and I’m sure of it now. I love you.”

“Colson, Pete and I slept together,” I blurt, and I’m a little shocked that a wave of vomit doesn’t follow my words. I feel wretched. Awful. Selfish.

Colson blinks, considers. “Oh,” he says. “Um. Do you…love me too?”

I blink, too, staring at him. “That’s…all you’re going to say about it?” I ask slowly, confused. 

Colson shrugs and scratches his head. “Am I supposed to be mad?” he asks. 

I shake my head, trying to clear away the confusion wrapping around my brain. “But…you and I, we’re together. Not you, me, and Pete.”

Colson shrugs. “I mean, the three of us kind of are. Together, I mean,” he says.

I give him an incredulous look. “Wait, what? Did y’all make a decision and forget to include me?” I ask. “Because last I checked, you and I were together and Pete was an occasional third who’s afraid of commitment.”

Colson cocks his head and gives me a knowing look. “You tryna tell me it’s just sex with Pete?”

I sputter and trip over my words. “I-I – what?” I shake my head. “Colson.”

“Alex,” Colson says with a chuckle. He sets a hand on my knee. His eyes are playful, and slowly, the knot in my stomach loosens. “You have feelings for Pete, too. I know it.”

“I-I–”

“So do I,” he continues. “I know he likes you, too. And me. We all like each other. Well, I love you,” he corrects, and my heart flutters. 

“Wait…you’re okay with this?” I ask. 

“If you are,” Colson says. 

“We need to call Pete. I’m so confused,” I groan, covering my face. 

Colson chuckles. “Polyamory is a thing, Alex,” he says. “There’s room in my heart for both of you. I think it’s the same for you, and for Pete.”

“But Pete doesn’t date,” I say, shaking my head again. My temples throb. 

Colson shrugs. “Not before us, really,” he says. “But I can almost guarantee if we told him we wanted to date him he’d say yes.”

I massage my temples. “Call him. Tell him to get over here.”

Colson chuckles and does as he’s told. 

Twenty minutes later, Pete walks in with a confused look on his face, and fuck, Colson was right. I really do have feelings for Pete. He kicks off his shoes and looks between me and Colson. “What the hell is going on?” he asks.

“Pete,” Colson says, guiding Pete to sit in the armchair. “Alex and I have something to tell you.”

“Oh Jesus,” he says, eyes widening. “Are you pregnant?”

“Fuck no!” Colson and I exclaim in unison.

Colson shakes his head. “Pete, no,” he says. “We…we don’t want to just fuck anymore.”

Pete’s face falls but he tries to hide it. “Oh. That’s fine,” he says quietly, averting his eyes.

“Jesus, Cols, way to scare him,” I admonish, shoving Colson’s shoulder. “Pete,” I say, waiting until he looks at me before continuing. “We don’t want to just fuck anymore,” I repeat.

Pete frowns but then clarity washes over his features. “Oh. As in…you guys want more.”

“Yeah,” Colson says, looking at Pete. “We want more.”

Pete swallows. “How does this even work?”

“I don’t know,” I confess. “But do we have to figure it all out now?”

“I guess not,” Pete says. “But…”

“Pete,” Colson interrupts. “Do you have feelings for Alex? For me?”

Pete nods, cheeks flushing slightly. 

“And we both have feelings for you,” Colson says, and now it’s his turn to blush. “So who says we can’t be together? All three of us.”

“No one, I guess,” Pete says. “Is this…legal?”

Colson and I laugh. “It’s not illegal,” I say. “I don’t know how marriage works exactly, but I think we’re a long way out from that.”

“Definitely,” Colson says with a laugh. 

“Do you need time to think?” I ask Pete.

Pete looks at me, then at Colson. He gets to his feet and comes over to me, cupping my chin as he drops to his knees before me. “No,” he says quietly. “I know what I want.” Then, he kisses me, and my heart soars in my chest. Holy shit. Is this really happening? I don’t have to choose. There’s room in my heart for both Pete and Colson. 

Pete breaks the kiss and then turns to face Colson. The blonde grabs the other man’s face and pulls him in for a kiss harder than the one Pete and I shared. My heart pounds and my stomach squeezes with affection as I watch them together. I hadn’t known something like this was possible, but the joy I feel is like nothing I’ve felt before. 

They break apart and Pete joins us on the couch. “Colson?” I say, and they turn to me. I bite my lip, cheeks reddening. “Um. I love you, too.” Colson beams, pulling me close for a kiss. When we pull back I look at Pete. “And Pete, I, uh, I love you, too.”

Pete grins and so does Colson. They pull me in and I’m lying across both of their laps now, and we’re laughing and kissing and cuddling. “I love you guys, too,” Pete says. 

I feel giddy, squished against these two men that I get to love and who love me back. Colson bends to kiss me and as I shift, my stomach cramps and I wince. 

“You okay?” Colson asks with a frown. 

I smile sheepishly. “I kind of haven’t eaten in a while,” I say.

Pete’s eyes narrow. “In how long?” he asks. 

I shake my head. “It doesn’t matter,” I say. “But I think my appetite just came back.”

Half an hour later, my coffee table is shoved out of the way and the three of us are on the floor with Chinese food and Cards Against Humanity. Pete groans when Colson chooses my card again. 

“Al, how are you so good at this?” he asks. 

I shrug, swallowing a bite of orange chicken and rice. “It’s a gift,” I say, and Colson snorts. 

Pete lifts a black card and, after Colson and I lay down our white cards, I pause to observe the room. The moment. The three of us, all together, really together, and I get a glimpse of our future. It feels so safe and warm and comforting and exciting all at the same time. 

I come back to earth at the sound of Pete’s voice repeating my name. His eyes crinkle as he grins amusedly. “Where’d you go?” he asks. 

I smile and take the black card, another victory. “Nowhere,” I say, looking between them. Pete - sweet, warm, and funny. Colson - sexy, sensitive, and intelligent. Two men that are utterly perfect for me. Suddenly, my stomach clenches with desire. Colson looks too delicious, long legs spread out before him, wearing sweats and a t-shirt, hair messy. And Pete, his brown hair having grown long, in sweats and a sweatshirt. They sit side by side leaning back against the couch, their shoulders touching. They’re every woman’s fantasy and they’re all mine.

I shove the cards aside and the boys watch me as I move closer, straddling them so that I have one leg over one of theirs. Colson’s hand finds my hip and Pete’s tucks my hair behind my ear. First, I lean into Colson, his eyes fluttering shut as I kiss him deeply. Pete’s hand moves down my side, caressing my curves as I kiss Colson deeply, humming in pleasure. 

Colson makes a husky little sound when I pull back, and his eyes are darker when he opens them. I smirk lightly and lean into Pete next, and his warm mouth welcomes mine with a kiss so hot that my body tingles down to my toes. Heat settles between my spread legs and I press closer to them. 

I pull back from Pete and Colson takes the opportunity to wrap his hand around my hair, tugging it so my head falls back just slightly. He leans in, grazing lips and teeth gently over my throat. I shiver, swallowing thickly. 

“Tell us what you want, baby,” Colson mumbles into my skin. His hand strokes my leg slowly, moving higher until the pads of his fingers press into the soft flesh of my inner thigh. 

I bite my lip, going quiet when it occurs to me what I want. Why does it feel so stupid to say out loud?

“Hey,” Colson says gently, noticing my sudden hesitancy. “What is it, love?”

“That. That’s what I want,” I blurt.

Colson’s brow furrows in confusion but then a gentle hand cups my chin and Pete turns my face so he can look into my eyes. “Love,” he murmurs, warm, brown eyes fixed on mine. “That’s what she wants.”

I glance at Colson who nods slowly, understanding. Then, he smiles softly, the corners of his eyes crinkling. White teeth peek out to bite down on his lip. But then, the warmth fades from his face, replaced by…fear? Discomfort?

“Col?” I ask quietly, touching his face. “What is it?”

He swallows hard, fingers twitching on my thigh. I look at Pete helplessly. Pete studies Colson for a moment and then nods once. “Let’s go to the bedroom,” he says decidedly. He and I get to our feet, and Colson hesitates for a moment before getting up. I reach out for his hand and he takes mine, avoiding my eyes. I frown and lead the way to my room. 

Pete sits on the bed first and then reaches for Colson. “C’mere,” he says gently. Once Colson is tucked up against Pete’s side, Pete gestures for me to join so Colson is sandwiched between us. Pete’s arm is wrapped around Colson’s shoulders so I snuggle into his chest, draping my arm over his waist. 

We lie quietly for a few minutes. Pete starts to play slowly with Colson’s hair and I steal a glance up at them. Pete looks thoughtful, like he’s considering what to say. Finally, he turns and presses a kiss to Colson’s forehead. “It’s okay,” he finally says, voice soft. I watch as Colson’s lip twitches. He looks so upset. What is going on? Did I say something wrong?

“Col?” I ask quietly. “Baby. Tell me what’s wrong.”

Colson’s eyes open and he looks up at Pete who nods. “It’s okay,” Pete assures Colson. “I promise.”

“I’ve never done that before,” Colson finally mutters. My brow furrows but then understanding washes over me. He’s never made love before. Shit. Neither have I, really. 

“Me neither,” I say quietly.

“Me neither,” Pete adds.

“So let’s do it together. The first time for all of us,” I say gently. “It’s okay to be vulnerable. No one’s going anywhere.”

“Even me,” Pete says. He gives me a sad look. “I’m sorry I left, Alex.”

It still stings, Pete’s ghosting of me after we hooked up the first time. I give him a wobbly smile. We all are still carrying so much pain, but we can move past it together. I know we can. 

I scoot up the bed just a little so I can reach Pete’s face, and then I lean over Colson’s body to kiss the brunette. “It’s okay,” I murmur against his lips. “We’re okay.” Then, I cup Colson’s cheek and turn his face to mine. He’s a little tense, clearly so scared, and as I kiss him, I hope this is enough to show him he can trust me, he can trust us. I’ll never hurt him. I’ll never hurt either of them. I swear it to myself in this moment that, as long as I live, I’ll live to make these two people happy.

[letmeoutofthebasementt]

Feedback: Please feel free to publish this publically if you want.

Thank you so so much for my reading 🙏. It was beautiful 💙. I was so touched by the msg. I've actually been asking the same question from a lot of readers but I've never received any msg from my FS as my reply, I always get something else delivered, usually what I should be doing to improve my chances of meeting my FS :) I do understand that's because that's what the cards show them. That's why I was really losing hope and had been wondering to myself that my person has no msg for me? Really? Nothing at all? Thing is I suffer from severe social anxiety due to which I rarely go out and my house has sort of become my prison.

Anyways, moving on. The very first paragraph that you gave me hit a cord with me - "I know you're going through a lot right now, and you feel like maybe you're meant to be alone. But just know that rather than being meant to be alone, you're meant to be with me. It's selfish of me, I suppose, but there's a part of me that's slightly happy that if I ever meet you, I know that i'll be able to have you instead of us being kept apart." This is literally, literally what I think to myself as well. I mean it - literally, I think the exact same thing to myself to justify my eternal singlehood. Right at this first paragraph I was like whoa!

I also liked the part where you mentioned that he said our relationship will be build up with caution and that's what will provide us stability. Coz this is very, very apt for my age.

This line really made me very emotional, it's all I ever wanted to hear 😢 "I'm coming into your life as quickly as I can, though once i'm there, just know that I don't plan on letting you go." And then came this part and I was balling my eyes out 😭 "We'll find one another in the place where we feel most comfortable and when we do...Well, we will become the place where the other feels most comfortable."

I was awed when you mentioned that he said that he'll give me a stable home even though I might feel selfish asking for it. I've never ever gotten this from any reader, and it's so SO true! I come from a very chaotic family, unfortunately I still am in it. It's again one of the reasons I'm not able to find anyone coz I don't want to date locally, I want to go far away from here. And I want nothing else except for a small home cozy home with my husband, just the two of us, and spending the rest of our days in love, peace and happiness. But I do feel selfish expecting this from him. Coz in my mind I go like that's putting too much expectations on him and maybe i shouldn't be doing that. But then again, it's all I want, nothing more, nothing less. So my brain and my heart are in constant state of tussle over this. I was also shocked when you said that it doesn't matter that I don't have much experience, he'll always be by my side. Coz i actually don't have much experience in such matters coz of my severe anxiety, that is one of the reasons I have been wondering if maybe I'm not meant to experience that part of life, like at all. It was amazing that you said this 💙.

Just like your first paragraph, your last lines sealed the msg for me - "Sorry to keep you waiting, but just hold on a little bit longer. I'll make sure it's worth it." 💞 So so beautiful 💞. You have no idea just how much I wanted to hear these words from him 🥹.

Thank you so, so much for making my day 🙏. I'm so immensely grateful to you from the bottom of my heart 🙏. Wishing you the best in your tarot journey 🕊️

I’m glad you liked it! I’m also really glad it struck home and resonated with you. And just from the reading I can tell you and your FS are both amazing people who’ll be perfect together. I’m wishing you the best as well! 🫶🏽

[fleur-de-violette]

Fire keeper

AO3

Summary:

There are very few examples in history of people actually sharing a devil fruit, but the most common theory is that the one who takes the first bite gains the power, as well as the curse.

There is, however, a lesser known legend, that stipulates that while the former is true, two people who shared a devil fruit are forever linked. They either die together, or not at all.

Or: Deuce is there in Marineford. Things turn out differently.

Note:  

Am I trying to go through all the “what could have gone differently” about Marineford? There is nothing you can prove.

Warning for imminent death and grief, and some free interpretation of the lore. Hope you’ll enjoy the story!  -

“Hey… Somebody… He needs a doctor.”

Luffy’s voice barely gets out, in contrast with his usual loud tone.

There is blood everywhere, and Ace’s body is heavy on his, but it will be alright. It has to be.

Ace promised, after all. So, he would be okay. With some rest, some food, and a lot of love, he would be okay. There was no alternative.

“Luffy. Please, listen to me. It’s too late.”

Ace’s arm starts to slip on him, and he does his best to keep it in place. “No, no no no, don’t talk like that. We’re going to find you a doctor, and…”

Nobody is moving. It’s like the world has stopped, and people are looking at them in pity, and Luffy doesn’t do well with pity. He never did. He’s an active person. When he sees someone in pain, he doesn’t pity them: he acts to make things better.

Ace is probably in pain right now. He’s probably been in pain for a long time, and Luffy doesn’t know how to fix this. He needs help, he needs a doctor, and no one seems to be doing anything.

Some part of him thinks absentmindedly that if Chopper were there, he would already be working on Ace’s wound. But he’s not here, is he? Stashed away with the rest of Luffy’s crew. His crew he was supposed to protect.

Robin’s eyes will forever be engraved in his brain. He told her he would protect her, and she trusted him. He told them he would protect them, he promised. And yet…

But Ace is different. Ace is not him, and he will keep his promise. Because Ace is reckless and a bit stupid, he has a hard time controlling his feelings and he can be a bit of an asshole, but he keeps his promises.

Big brothers do that, after all.

But Ace’s arm keeps weakening on him, and all of sudden he feels cold, so cold, and he needs Ace to half hug him and tell him everything is going to be okay.

He needs the warmth of his brother’s fire, and everything is so, so cold.

“Please, I can’t…”

He can’t. He can’t do it on his own, he can’t be left alone, being alone is terrifying, it’s worse than being in pain. Because the world is big -so, so big- and that’s usually something he says with awe, but right now it seems too big, too cold to be alone in.

He knows it, he’s not stupid, or, maybe he is, a little, but he is self-aware enough to realize that he’s selfish. He’s loud and he imposes himself on people and he fights to keep them, he fights for them, but it’s not for them, not really. He’s just so, so scared of being left alone.

He will take the pain. He will take the pain a hundred times if it means not being alone.

“Of course, you can. You’re strong. You’re so strong and I’m so proud to call you my brother.”

This is not what Luffy wants to hear. He doesn’t care. He doesn’t care if Ace is proud or not. He doesn’t even care if Ace hates him, if it means he’s still here.

It’s selfish, maybe, but who cares? He’s in so much pain, and soon, he will be all alone in this world. Can’t he be a little selfish?

“My only regret,” Ace’s voice is barely above a whisper now, “is that I won’t be able to see you fulfill your dream.”

“Don’t say that,” Luffy repeats, because what more can he say? He will fulfill his dream. And then he will come back to Ace to brag. Because Ace hates being the son of the previous Pirate king, but maybe, just maybe, he will be proud to call the next one his brother. But for that, he has to be there. He has to stay there, no matter how much it hurts, no matter how hard it is. He promised.

“Don’t leave me alone.” Luffy doesn’t care if he’s pitiful, he doesn’t care if Ace calls him weak or a crybaby afterwards.

There is a soft, weak laugh next to his head. “Come on. You’re not alone. Don’t you have a crew waiting for you? You made incredible friends, so you won’t ever be alone.”

Ace coughs, and something wet and warm falls on Luffy’s shoulder. “And neither am I. You came, you all came. Someone like me, who is good for nothing…”

Luffy wants to correct him, not let him deprecate himself with his last words, but he doesn’t dare say anything. Ace is crying now, and he doesn’t want to cut him off. Not now.

“Thank you, for loving me.”

And then…

Nothing.

The word shuts down. Everything becomes dark and cold.

In a small corner of his mind, Luffy realizes this is the end. He failed. Ace is dead. But this feeling, as painful as it is, is swallowed beneath the immensity of the nothingness.

He’s just cold. He’s just, so very cold. He’s been to winter islands, he’s climbed a mountain during a snowstorm carrying both Sanji and Nami on his back, and yet he’s never been this cold in his entire life.  

He’s so cold.

Until, slowly, gradually, he starts to feel warmth.

On his back, his chest, around his shoulder, he starts feeling something warm. There is a light, so small, that brings him back to the present.

Ace’s body is on fire.

“Ace?”

He picks him up, manhandles him so he can get a better look at the injury. He barely notices that the fire isn’t burning him, just gently warming his ice-cold skin.

Ace blinks back at him. He’s still covered in blood, there are tears tracks on his face, but he’s there. The flames had covered the horrible wound on his chest.

“What?”

Luffy slowly becomes aware of his surroundings again. The general feeling in Marineford seems to be the same one as the one Ace and him are feeling: confusion.

Luffy isn’t one to pass on a blessing, but he saw Ace die. And now his brother is burning. This is little too much for his exhausted brain.

Taking advantage of the general puzzlement, someone comes up to them. Luffy initially tenses when the unknown man enters the careful bubble where they are sitting, but Ace seems to relax when he sees him.

The guy has shoulder length blue hair and a mask on his face. He’s tall, but doesn’t seem built like a fighter. He’s wearing expensive looking clothing.

He’s also, and that’s maybe the most noticeable thing, on fire.

Like Ace, he doesn’t look distressed by the flames. He just looks like he has no idea what’s going on either.  

Ace jumps in his arms, like he had suddenly remembered something important.

“Ah, I need to introduce you. Luffy, this is my ex-first lieutenant and crewmate Deuce. Deuce, this is Luffy, my little brother. I told you a lot about him.”

Luffy extends the hand that is not holding Ace toward Deuce, not ready to let go of his brother just yet.

“Nice to meet you.”

Deuce shakes his hand, still looking confused. “Nice to meet you… wait, now is not the time to make introductions!” His face colors slightly in red as he screams, and something in him reminds Luffy of Nami or Zoro when they reprimand him. “Do you know what’s going on?”

Ace shakes his head. “They shared a devil fruit,” says someone, probably a Whitebeard pirate, somewhere. Luffy blinks. What does that have to do with everything?

“When two people share a devil fruit, the most common theory is that the person who took the first bite gains the power, and the curse.” Luffy turns toward Ivankov, who just talked. “But there is another theory, the idea that sharing the cursed fruit links the fates of the ones who do. That they die together… or not at all.”  

Deuce seems to think about it for a second. “That’s got to come with a price,” he says, more to himself than to anyone else. “All miracles do.”

Ace looks at him with wide eyes and Deuce seems to realize what he just said, he swallows and says with a forced smile, “But we will deal with it, right? Nothing can stop us. Spades pirates, right? Or, not really, now, I guess, but-”

“Deuce.”

Ace is talking more to the ground than to his friend, and Luffy can’t help but tighten his grip on him a little. “I’m sorry, I got you involved in this. I got you linked with me forever and I-”

Deuce falls to his knee next to them and takes Ace’s head with his still burning hands. “You don’t get it, do you?”

Ace doesn’t say anything and Luffy just stays there, feeling like he will interrupt something if he talks, but also not ready to completely let go yet.

Deuce takes a deep breath, before letting it go. “I love you. I love you. I always did and I’ll repeat it as much as I need. You didn’t get me involved in anything. I do the things I do, I keep on following you, not because you made me do it, but because I chose to. I follow you because I love you. I never told you, I never found the words, I didn’t want to mess it up, but now I realize I should have said it. I should have said it so many times. I love you. I thought you would realize it, I thought you would notice, but that’s like expecting a fire to notice the moths gathering around it.”

“Please don’t call yourself a moth,” says Ace weakly, his voice a little wet.    

“But that’s what it is, isn’t it? You just keep going, and you never stop, you don’t think about the people around you, you don’t think about me, and please, don’t start apologizing now, because you never apologized for anything you did to me. You know, I had a plan, I knew what I was going to do with my life, but then you had to come and destroy it. You made me a pirate; you made me who I am. I was no one, and you made me. You think you linked us when we shared that fruit? That’s wrong. You linked us the second you set foot on that island. You came into my life without knocking and you made yourself at home in my heart, and you gave me a name, and then I blinked, and you were gone, further away, faster and faster in the way of your life, as if you were rushing toward its end, and I couldn’t stop you. I couldn’t catch you, and the thing is, I didn’t even want to.

You know, I have never fallen in love before, all my knowledge came from books, so I thought that when you love someone, there is a part of you that wants to hold them, to possess them. But I never felt that way. Because I knew, I always knew, you aren’t someone who can be caught. So, I just accepted it, I accepted that I’d stay in the big shadow you cast, and I wouldn’t not try to hold you, try to catch you, because that would be like trying to catch the sun itself. And just now, I felt like I had lost my light, and that I’ve been powerless to stop you from extinguishing, and I realized… After everything, I never told you. So, here we are. I love you. And you don’t have to say anything back, because I know you, and I know you won’t stop for me. But, I love you.”

Deuce gets his burning hand in front of his face. “And, no matter the consequences, I am so glad we got a second chance.”  

All three of them just stays there in silence for a while, before Ace open his mouth, closes it, and opens it again to say, “Deuce-”

“I’m sorry to interrupt your moment,” says a voice above them and Luffy turns his head to see the phoenix-pineapple guy standing there. “But this is still a battlefield, and we need to get out of here. Now.”  

There’s a movement, and Luffy feels himself being lifted from the ground, held tightly by Ace’s arm. A strong Talon is clenched on his brother’s shoulder. All three of them, still tightly interlocked, are being lifted into the air by the phoenix, and for a second Luffy allows himself to forget everything about the events of the past few weeks to just enjoy the feeling of flying.

But it only lasts one second and then they hit the deck of a boat, and the phoenix guy leaves, probably to get some more people to safety.

Luffy stays there, sitting on a boat, for a moment. Now that they are all safe, he can feel his body relaxing.

He blinks. The ship is rocking. Everything is blurry.

He let himself fall back on the wooden deck.

“Luffy!!”

Suddenly, Ace’s face is in front of his, eyes wide in worry.

“It’s okay,” he says, “it’s fine, I just need to sleep it off.”

“No, it’s not, you need- Who are you?”

There is apparently someone else on the ship, because Ace turns his back to him to put himself between him and the stranger. Now that he sees it, Ace is still bleeding. So, whatever happened healed him enough so his life wouldn’t be in danger, but didn’t heal him completely.

“I’m a doctor,” says a voice he might have heard before, but he can’t really remember at the moment. “Let me help him.”

Ace doesn’t move and Luffy can clearly hear him say, “Don’t come any closer! Don’t touch him!”

When he was a kid, he once tried to save an injured fox. Turns out she had pups, and even as he tried to help her, she would stay defensively in front of her hole.

He doesn’t know why he’s remembering that just right now. For now, he just closes his eyes.

-

He blinks. He’s on a bed. There are machines around him. He’s probably still on a ship.

“You’re awake,” says a voice above him. It’s the man from earlier, who said he was a doctor. Now, Luffy recognizes him; he was in Sabaody. Tra…something.

“Is Ace okay?” he asks. This is his first important question.

The man sighs. “Yes. I had to sedate him, but he’s okay.”

Now, for his second important question: “Can I have food?”  

That gets him a half smile. “Yes. Don’t move, and I’ll get you some.” The man stands up and slowly walks toward the door. Just as he reaches it, he asks, “Don’t you want to know why I saved you?”

Luffy just looks at him with blank eyes. The answer is obvious. “If it’s important, you’ll tell me.”

Again, he gets a half smile for his trouble. “That’s fair,” the man says before leaving.

Now, he knows this Tra-guy told him to stay here, but he’s not taking orders from him, and he’s not good at staying put, so about a minute after the door closes, he gets up and starts exploring.

Not long into his exploration of the ship, he runs into what he was looking for: the kitchen. Someone is there, eating. When he approaches, he recognizes him.

“Oh, hey, pineapple guy! Thank you for saving us.”    

“It’s Marco,” says the pineapple guy. “And shouldn’t you be in the infirmary?”

Luffy just shrugs and takes some of the food in front of him.

“Hey,” says the man without heat, “I was eating that.”

“So what? Don’t pirates take what they want?”

Marco groans. “Go ahead, then. After all, this will never be as good as…”

He trails off, and Luffy observes him for a second. “Are you okay?” he asks.

“Yeah, I’ll be fine. Nothing for you to worry about, kid.”

After a few moments of silence where Luffy is eating and Marco is staring at nothing, he adds, “If it’s Ace you’re looking for, he and Deuce are in a room following this corridor.” He points toward said corridor.

“Are they okay?” Luffy asks.

Marco marks a short pause before answering, “Worried about you.”

“I see.”

He eats a bit more before asking, “And your old man?”

Marco looks at the ceiling and takes a long breath. “He’s still alive, yes. We have the Surgeon of Death to thank for that. Without him… I don’t like to owe a rookie, especially one that seems so eager to collect, but we didn’t have a choice. But again, nothing for you to worry about.”

He looks tired. But, as he says, there isn’t much Luffy can do about it, so he finishes his plate before standing up. “Alright, then. Thank you for the meal.”

“You stole from me,” says Marco as he walks toward the room the man showed him.

Ace is still asleep when he enters, and only Deuce rises to look at him.

“You’re awake,” he says.

“You guys slept together?” Luffy asks.

For some reason, that has Deuce turning red. “No, we didn’t… what?”

“I mean, you guys slept in the same bed.”

“Oh,” the man seems to regain his composure. “Yeah, yeah, that. It happened often when we started sailing and I guess we both needed the familiarity.”

Luffy lets himself fall on a chain near the bed, humming. “Thank you, for saving him.”

Deuce sighs. “I mean, I didn’t really-”

“You did.” He succeeded where Luffy failed. “It’s nice to know he has people like you looking out for him.”

Ace is sleeping, his face peaceful on the comforter, his back against Deuce, mouth half-open. If he were awake, he would probably mock Luffy for talking like this. Insisting that he was the oldest, and it was his job to worry about Luffy, not the other way around.

But he’s not awake, and it’s just Luffy and Deuce right now, so he can say it.

“I know my brother can be a lot to handle,” he says. “But take care of him for me, okay?”     

-

Hope you enjoyed the story! Many thanks to @ohmytoddhewitt for beta reading!!

[jhilsara]

Can you add the rest of the notes?

Part 7 *v* (aka the last of my notes lol)

When she starts her first day of her master’s program, the house hold feels different. No one talks during breakfast, and it’s something in the air. She bites her tongue, still thinking about how maybe… maybe she’s being selfish wanting the boys to stay by her side if there’s a war happening.

Damien also notices these thoughts, and low key… agrees.

At uni Diana is posing as a professor, stopping MC.

She freezes upon entering her first lecture. She wants to scream and literally call for Sam. But she doesn’t. She has to talk to the succubus. “Diana, why are you here?” She asks her after the lecture, the two women alone in the room. She raises a perfect brow at how polite the human seems. “I told you why, I need them to come with me. I just need one of them to marry me and then I can destroy their father before he destroys the abysall plains.” She says in irritation. “Why does one of them need to marry you? Can’t they just go with you and fight?” She asks in genuine confusion. Diana bristles, “It’s not that easy. If I want in, I need the political power and safety of a marriage. Fake or not.” She says. “Their father will forgive them if I waltz in with one of them on my arm, easy.” “They deserve their freedom just as much as you Diana… why does it have to be complicated?” “Do not tell me how my domain works human!” She presses into her, her magic pooling around her, “I am a direct descendant of Lilith, I will marry one of them and I will take down that tyrant if it’s the last living thing I do!” MC holds her ground, “I don’t understand why you can’t just ask them for help!” “A human like you could never understand, so just run along back to your life. I will take them with me and you will forget they were ever in your life.” MC get’s closer to her, glaring, “They won’t leave without a fight, and I’m telling you…it would be easier to have them work with you. Not against.”

When MC gets home shes fummmmming. Damien checks on her cause her brains just screaming at him. If she wants it to or not.

“You’re pretty worked up… wanna talk about it?” Damien “I don’t understand why she cant just ask you all for help? Why does it have to involve marriages and politics? If your father is so awful why… “ She bites her tongue. “Why don’t we just go and help?” he finishes “I didn’t mean it like that… I understand not wanting to go back to a known abuser… especially if this is one who also murders. I just don’t understand why she is trying to force you all to help instead of just asking.” Damien sighs, “It’s the world we grew up in. Demons aren’t accustomed to having to ask for help. It’s always a battle for territory. So to her, marrying one of us is winning a territory battle. It’s all she knows. And she knows war… trust me.” MC sighs. “Would you help her? If she asked I mean?” she prods. “I would… I- I don’t know about my brothers but I think it’s our duty to take him down if we’re being asked. It’s selfish of us to escape and not offer that to the abyssal plains.” He says softly. "I know I wanted out, and they followed with me... doesn't make it right." “Diana needs a new tactic, cause the forced marriage will never work, and it’ll just piss them off.” MC tells him. “It’s already made them upset…” Damien states with a chuckle. She grabs Damien’s hand and squeezes it. “There’s no right answer here. You guys are victims too… you don’t have to go back. It’s your decision.” She tells him. He nods and hugs her tightly before standing up. “I’m going to talk to them.” Damien states.

MC is in the study, looking through the magical notes James wrote out for her, and she is practicing. As much as she can anyway.

There's a knock on the door and Sam walks in, avoiding her gaze

“Do you want us to leave?” He asks, voice a little accusing. She balks, “What?” she asks standing and moving closer to him. “Damien… we were talking about what to do…” He says through gritted teeth, still avoiding her eyes. She reaches out to him. Grabbing his face. “Sam…I don’t want you to leave. I do want you to do what’s best for you… which if that means going back,” she takes a shaky breath, “then I’ll support you. Whatever choice you and your brothers make I’ll support.” She tells him softly. He scoffs but looks at her, with furrowed brows. “I want to be with you… and not worry about demons or devils anymore.” He bites out. She takes a shaky breath, “I want that too…” She whispers to him. He wraps his arms around her waist, pulling her tightly to him, pressing his face into her neck. “I… fuck…” he hisses out. She runs her fingers through his hair, trying to sooth him. “It’ll work out Sam, I promise.” She whispers to him. His grip tightens, “You don’t know my father…” he scoffs. “I know you, and your brothers… I think that’s enough. I believe in you guys.” She murmurs pressing a soft kiss to his temple.

Diana doesn’t show herself for another month. (OCTOBER) It’s enough to put everyone on edge, but also, they’ve been thinking on what to do.

MC is walking to one of her classes, and suddenly she’s being pulled dimensionally.

She ends up, disoriented, on the ground in front of Diana and an assortment of other demons. “I -what the hell is going on?! You’re kidnapping me now?” MC shouts at her. Diana looks just as surprised, “What? No! We…” she turns sharply to the man who is shrouded in all black, “I told you to take what the Demon Lord wanted!” The man looks equally confused, “I did… he wants… a human girl?” The larger man in the corner is holding an imp, who’s squealing and trying to pry itself free. “What is this imp?! A joke?!” the larger man shouts. “Demon lord said to grab human witch! Put spell on her!” the imp says with a shout. Diana’s head whips to MC. She has a face of sympathy. “What’s happening? What happened to me!” MC demands. Diana crouches down, “I’m sending you home… but you should warn those brothers their father knows what is important to them.” She turns to the cohort behind her, “That already took so much energy succubus. Are you sure you want to try sending this mortal back?” Diana sighs, “She doesn’t belong here, besides, it would just be too much trouble having to manage her.” MC is confused as hell. Another portal opens, Diana has bags under her eyes, as she helps with it. “Go. And like I said, warn those dimwitted brothers.” She growls out. MC tries to walk through, confusion clouds her brain. She gets knocked back. Thrown across the floor. Diana does too. The two women landing in a pile together. “THE HUMAN SHALL STAY IN THE PLAINS, TRAPPED TIL SHE IS JUST REMAINS. DEATH OF ONE OR THE DEATH OF MANY IS THE PRICE OF THE DEMON LORDS DISDAIN.” A voice roars amongst the room. Rattling them all. MC looks at the portal as it closes in fear, her brows furrowed. “I… what? What’s going on?” she whispers on the floor looking at Diana with tears pricking her eyes as panic truly sets in. “What’s going on?!” Diana groans as she sits up and shoots a glare at the MC. “You’re trapped here… either until you die or we kill the demon lord. He’s cursed you.” She says in irritation. "Ezaeur!” One of the other rushes to Diana and goes to pick her up, cradling her close to him.

Diana against her better judgement, let’s the MC stay. She puts her up in a room.

MC is standing with Diana and her group trying to figure out what to do, which is mostly, let the human roam the castle but stay the hell out of the way. Don’t touch anything and above all don’t try her little magic tricks she’s barely learned.

She begrudgingly agrees to these terms, before there’s another portal that opens.

The brothers fall through, landing roughly. Sam springs up immediately, seeing her, then seeing Diana. He goes for her throat. Literally. “I warned you and you didn’t listen! I’ll kill you!” Diana is thrown against the wall by Sam, and Saero in turn attacks the Sam. The two are circling each other like rabid animals. Diana grabs her throat, coughing and hacking, she glares at MC. “Call off your mut.” She bites out. MC bristles at that, but looks up at Sam. The other brothers easily get up and look at her, Damien coming to her side and making sure she’s okay. “Sam! Sam stop it!” She shouts to him, her voice tired from the exhaustion sweeping her body. Sam whips his head to see her and Damien standing next to her. “She’s fine Sam, look at her.” Damien says with a raised brow. Sam calms down, only a bit, and comes over to wrap himself around her. “Fuck, thought you were hurt…” he whispers against her. She wraps her arms around him. Saero is dotting on Diana, making sure she’s okay. “What… what exactly happened here?” James asks in exasperation. “Your rotten father happened that’s what.” Diana spits out. “Excuse me?” Erik bristles a little thrown back. “You heard me! I warned you and tried to end this sooner, but no. You just had to stay with the little humans!” she shouts in anger. Glaring at them. “Your father has cursed her. He found you just as easily as I did. And now your precious little human can’t go home. Its either her life or his. That’s how you end this.” Diana says standing full height, menacingly. The silence is loud as everyone looks around. Sam keeps a tight grip on MC, glaring over at Diana. “Then we kill the bastard.” He growls out. Diana nods

They get a run down over what they’re doing. They disappear into different rooms.

She tightens her hand around Sam’s, “Will you stay with me?” she asks, fear creeping in the edges of her voice. Sam nods in agreement. Pressing a kiss to the side of her face. “wouldn’t dream of anything else.” They lay down, the exhaustion seeping out of her body. There’s a dresser that Diana pressed some clothes into and MC changes into pajamas. By the time she’s in the bed with Sam, she takes a shaky breath and finally, she just sobs into him. Sam holds her to him tightly, whispering reassurance to her. “I know you don’t deserve this and I’ve dragged you into it… but I promise, it’ll be over. I’ll never put you in danger again.” He whispers to her. She tightens her grip on him. “Sam…I…” She hiccups past her sob. “I’m glad you came for me and I wouldn’t change meeting you. Ever.” She takes a shaky breath, “I love you… I’m just so afraid.” Sam’s breath hitches and he feels his heart skip a beat. He wraps himself around her, protectively, feeling something stir deep inside him. “I don’t know, what love is supposed to feel like, but I do believe I love you.” He tells her. Voice soft and gruff. She feels a new set of tears, but these are happier. As she presses a kiss to his lips. “I’ve wanted to tell you that for a while… just didn’t…I was afraid.” She murmurs. He nods pressing a kiss to her neck that makes her shudder. “I was too. I realized I couldn’t… I can’t lose you. I’d die before I let you get hurt again.” He tells him, voice determined.

And that's all I have note wise.... I need to replay the 2nd game to figure out what I'm doing but thanks for reading my notes and I hope you liked them!

[in-my-feels-probably]

Empyrean - Chapter Seven

Chapter 7

The next day, Kaz’s plan–that he conveniently had yet to explain to anyone–was set into motion.

Everyone started early in the morning, each having their own set duties. Inej and Elham finished first, waiting for Wylan and Jesper to return. When they finally did, Inej and Elham went to find Kaz to let him know they were ready for the next step.

They found him in an upstairs room of an inn, sitting in a chair as he stared passively out the window. He had a pen in his hands, flicking his fingers in a way that made the pen disappear from sight. Elham watched in awe, as if she hadn’t seen him do it a million times before. Sleight of hand was always a trick she wished she had mastered, valuing Kaz’s ability to use it just as much as she valued her own ability with a sword.

Inej broke the silence, pulling both Kaz and Elham from their thoughts. “Kaz, Wylan’s brought the compound. Jesper’s helping load it in.”

Kaz nodded, standing. His face grew solemn, and if he was anyone else, he would have already keeled over from the sheer stress of knowing what was coming. He spoke sternly, willing his words to stick.

“Listen to me, the both of you. If the plan goes awry, you have to go. Inej, get out of the city as fast as you can, find your brother, and never look back. Elham…go with her. And if you can’t find her, just go. Don’t come back. That’s an order. Promise me.” “What?” Elham asked, shaking her head. “You can’t ask that of us.”

“I can, and I will,” Kaz retorted with determination. “Promise me.”

Inej watched the exchange, and Elham could tell by the look on her face that she was at war with herself internally. On one hand, she’d finally be free to go find her family. The open seas, waiting for her. On the other, she’d be leaving behind the only family she had left, not knowing if her birth family was even out there waiting for her to come and find them. She kept quiet as Kaz and Elham argued, only speaking when Kaz asked them again to promise.

Inej took a breath, making her decision. “I can promise you only that Pekka will beg for his death.”

She was gone before anyone could speak. The room was left in silence after her absence, and neither Elham or Kaz could muster up the words to fill it. Elham turned back around to look at him, her eyes softening as she remembered what he was asking of her. If it went to shit, he wanted her to go. He wanted her to leave him. It was bold–and maybe ignorant–of him to believe that she’d ever truly listen to him if it ever came down to having to fulfill her promise. If promising him meant that she’d have to leave his side, then it would be a promise she’d have to break. And if that was the case, then why promise him anything at all? Inej was right to only promise what she did, and Elham followed in her footsteps.

“If you think I’m going to leave–regardless of anything that happens–you’ve gone mad.”

Kaz sighed, fighting her words. “El, please–”

“No!” She cut him off, determined to make him hear her. “I won’t go. My family is here. You’re here. I won’t abandon any of you just to save myself. I can promise you this, Kaz. If it all goes to shit, I’ll make sure Inej gets out. I’ll do what I can to make sure we all get as far away from here as possible. But if you’re asking me to leave any of you behind, I won’t do it. You can’t ask that of me. Not you.”

Kaz wanted to fight her. He wanted to scream at her. Scream, shout, and yell himself hoarse, anything to scare her into leaving. It was bad enough that he was putting all the Crows at risk just for the sake of taking down an enemy. And it was selfish to want them by his side when he finally did manage to take Pekka down, but Saints, he wanted them by his side. He wanted her by his side.

He decided he could let himself be selfish, just this once. If it meant his Valkyrie would be with him to watch the kingdom crumble.

So, he didn’t fight her. Despite his brain screaming at him to push her away, to tell her to run…he didn’t fight. Kaz took a deep breath, gripping the head of his cane tightly. His voice was soft as he spoke, barely a whisper.

“I’m glad you’ll be with me…to watch the King of the Barrel fall.”

Elham managed a laugh, a small smile on her face. She nodded, fighting back the emotion welling up inside her as she took a grounding breath.

“I wouldn’t miss it for anything.”

“Don’t tell anyone else,” he said after a moment of silence as she headed for the door. “About the end of the plan. The rest of them know the beginning, but you’re the only one who knows the rest. Not even Nina knows the true end. It has to look real–all of it–or this was all for nothing.”

She nodded, slightly hurt by the insinuation that she’d ever betray his trust. “I know. You don’t have to remind me of that. We’ve got this.”

—

Back in the city, Elham helped Wylan and Jesper bring in boxes full of festival decorations into a nearby cafe. She set hers on a table, her eyes watering from the cloud of dust that billowed up as she set it down.

“You know–in most places–Sankt Emerens is just a simple harvest festival,” Wylan said, giving Elham a grateful smile when she hurried to hold the door open for him.

Jesper kicked the door closed behind him, a grin on his face. “Well, in the Barrel, the Patron Saint of Brewers gets the respect he deserves.”

“Sankt Emerens drowned in a grain silo trying to drive out rats.”

Elham stood behind Jesper, quickly covering his ears with her hands. “Wylan, please don’t slander the name of the Saint neither Jesper nor I believe in. We pretend he’s real just for the day. This holiday is the happiest I see Jesper every year, and we can allow him to live in his delusions if he wants to.”

“That’s right, El,” Jesper smiled, throwing an arm around her shoulder. “Any holiday that mixes cold brew with a little light roleplay is fine by me.”

“Gross,” Elham muttered, shrugging his arm off her.

“You’re just jealous you have no one to roleplay with–”

“Shut up!” Elham scolded, knocking Jesper in the side with her hip.

Jesper stumbled over his feet, losing his balance. He set the box he was holding on the table down with a loud thud, making Wylan visibly wince.

“Careful! Break one of those and there’ll be an uncomfortable role to play for nine to twelve hours.”

Elham’s eyes widened in shock, her jaw dropping as she spoke in a hushed whisper. “We gave Jesper the box full of the powdery shit to hold? Have you gone mad? You could have at least told me he was carrying it, I wouldn’t have bumped into him if I knew!”

“Or–and I'm just spitballing here—you could maybe be nice to me and not dig your hip into my ribs.”

With one look from Elham, Jesper quickly retracted his statement, shaking his head. He opted for the much safer option, which was leaving her alone and digging through the box of costumes. Eventually, he pulled out a red mask with a bird's beak, holding it up to his face.

“Not many people can pull off a beak,” he smirked, lowering it. “Go on, then. Your turns.”

Wylan rooted through the box, passing various items to Jesper and Elham. “Oh, don’t forget your gloves.”

Jesper quickly took them, pulling them onto his hands. He placed a rather large red hat on top of his head, a feather tucked in the stitching to match. Wylan haphazardly handed a feathery green boa to Elham, along with a mask mimicking a white wolf’s face.

“I can’t wear this!” She huffed, rummaging through the box herself. “It doesn’t match.”

Wylan ignored her protests, pulling out a mask resembling a cat’s face. “Perfect! It covers my whole face.”

“I kind of like your face,” Jesper grinned, a twinkle in his eyes.

“For fucks sake,” Elham murmured, dropping her costume back in the box. “If you two are gonna be unbearable like this all day, I’ll be forced to pair up with someone else. Seriously, I can’t take it. You’re adorable, and it’s quite frankly nauseating.”

Inej entered the room coming down the stairs before Elham could complain any more, a costuming adorning her as well. Elham couldn’t even make out what it was supposed to be, but it still somehow suited her. “You look nice. I think green is your color. There’s a matching boa in that box if you want it.”

Inej grimaced, trying to pull the fabric away from her face. “These smell like they haven’t been washed since last year.”

Jesper made a face, but decided against speaking, knowing that was probably true. Suddenly, Kaz entered the room coming from the same way Inej did, immediately heading for the box from Wylan’s lab. He opened it, scanning the contents, before looking up at Wylan.

“It’ll mimic it in every way?” He asked.

Wylan only nodded.

Kaz closed the box, latching it shut. “Good.”

Reluctantly, he turned to face Jesper. He didn’t get a chance to speak, Jesper thankfully taking the lead on what could have been a painfully awkward conversation.

“You’re gonna say you can’t do this without me, yeah? And that you hate it when we’re angry at each other, but sometimes brothers fight. And that when all this is over, you’ll open a tab for me at the club of my choosing. Because when Pekka’s gone, you’ll take it all. That’s what you were gonna say. Yes?”

Elham could feel her heart swell at his words, lightly chuckling at the proud look on his face after he finished rambling. “Very subtle, darling.”

“There’s a cap on the tab,” Kaz finally answered after a moment of silence. “But otherwise, yes. To all of that.”

“You do have a heart in there,” Elham said exaggeratedly, feigning surprise. “I knew it.”

Kaz rolled his eyes at her dramatics, but he was biting his tongue to keep himself from grinning. He was finding it harder and harder to do that each day. And dwelling on that scared him, so he’d rather bite his tongue for now.

“The plan is this,” he started once he pulled himself together. “Jesper and Wylan, you’re gonna hand out Komedie Brute costumes and vials of the compound to all of the Dregs. Per Haskell’s gang: our gang, now. By sunset, the streets will be crawling with Sankt Emerens revelers. They’ll provide us with the cover we need. Hit all of Pekka’s business, the clubs, and the brothels. All to destroy Pekka’s reputation. Inej will cover Fifth Harbor, and when the chaos begins, she’ll hand the note to Pekka’s driver.”

Nina suddenly entered the room, looking rather upset. She held a cup of tea tightly in her hands, and Elham made a mental note to check up on her later, once all of this was over. She kept quiet for now as Kaz continued.

“Elham, Nina, and I will handle the Emerald Palace. See you there.”

“No mourners,” Jesper said determinedly, and Elham suddenly felt the weight of what they were doing hit her.

“No funerals,” she choked out with everyone else.

Everyone besides Elham, Nina, and Kaz walked out the door, leaving no time for extra sympathies or precautions.

Nina downed the rest of her tea, rubbing her hands together. “I hope you two are good actors.”

“We’ve done it before,” Elham shrugged, trying not to groan at the memory of that hideous dress Kaz forced her to wear when they went to the Archives. “Go ahead, then, love. But please don’t hit me in the face. I’m so sick of getting hit in the face.”

“No, don’t hit her,” Kaz said, shaking his head towards Nina.

Elham raised a brow in confusion. “What?”

“You heard me,” he said, his voice never wavering. “No.”

“Kaz, I can take it–”

“I know you can, but no. Nina, don’t hit her, just slow her heartbeat like you’ll do with mine. Pekka will be focused on me. El’s just for confirmation. He’ll know you’ve held up your end of the deal and that you’re not trying to trick him because you’ll have her, too,” Kaz reasoned, knowing how likely it would be that in the event he ever were to get caught, Elham would probably be by his side to get caught too.

“Don’t listen to him, hit me if you have to,” Elham said, ignoring the sharp look Kaz sent her way. “Piss off, Kaz. If it means keeping Matthias out of the fights at Hellgate until we figure out how to go get him, you can hit me. It’s alright, Nina.”

Nina nodded, taking a breath. “Sweet of you to offer, but no. I’m hitting Kaz. No offense, El, but he’s the boss, and it’s him who will be running things once Pekka is gone. He’s all I’ve got to free Matthias. And he’s right, it’ll make Pekka think it’s real. You’re just being dragged along for believability’s sake.”

Elham’s face soured, but she finally relented, knowing they were both right. “Fine. Let’s just get this over with. Do what you have to do.”

In one swift movement–leaving no time for debate–Nina socked Kaz across the jaw with a mean right hook. Elham stifled a gasp, wincing as he staggered back. He wiped his sleeve across his mouth once he recovered. He turned to face Elham, his eyes softening on her almost imperceptibly.

“Ready?” He asked her, his voice unnervingly gentle.

What a question it was. Was she ready to face Pekka Rollins, after the years of torment he had put her and the people she loved through? Was she ready to be a central part in pulling off one of the biggest tricks the Crows have ever attempted? Was she ready to watch Kaz be confronted with the man that has kept him going this long out of nothing but pure spite? Knowing he may or may not falter, and there was nothing she could do about it?

“No,” she answered truthfully, shaking her head. “But we have to do it, right? I’m ready if you’re ready.”

He nodded, turning to face Nina. “Alright, then. Do your worst.”

Nina sighed, raising her hands. With a look of pity, she moved her fingers, and Elham could feel her heart clench in her chest. She turned to Kaz with wide eyes, seeing that he had brought a gloved hand up to clutch at his chest.

“Go,” he muttered through clenched teeth. “Just walk, El.”

Taking as deep a breath as she could, they made their way together to Emerald Palace, where Pekka Rollins awaited their arrival.

–

A/N - Hi! Another update! We’re getting into the good shit now, I’m excited to write the rest of this. I know we’re far from that point, but I’ve been thinking about the dream sequence towards the end of the show, and I've definitely been coming up with some ideas. So, that’ll be fun. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this. As always, any comments or feedback is greatly appreciated. See you soon with another chapter :)

[rpmemestorehouse]

Until Dawn Real-time Fandub Starters: Part 2

Change wording as needed

“No! I’ll be fine! I will be fine.”

“What do I usually do to get un-scared? I tell myself jokes...”

“Oh man, I feel great. This is really, this is a great idea.”

“All right you son of bitch, and by ‘you son of a bitch’ I guess I just mean the general atmosphere which just made me uneasy.”

“I should have known that saying what that thing was would have made it leave. Just like when I called my wife a bitch and she left.”

“Heyyy! I’m a funny little hand!”

“AUGH DAGNABBIT! My fricken wingers!”

“Aaaah I’m sure there’s a way to pry this open, but you know what I always hated these two fingers anyway.”

“You know, that’s the thing about sharp objects. I don’t know why we stopped carrying them around.”

“Cavemen had it right when they were like ‘oonga boonga I take sharp rocks’.”

“WOOF WOOF WOOF!”

“Why can you talk?! Why can you talk!?”

“Wow. I just - my brain needs to catch up.”

“Did I scare you?!”

“Hey do you wanna hear a Chuck Norris joke?”

“I’m gonna put this jacket on even though it might have asbestos in it.”

“My telekinesis isn’t working.”

“WAIT WAIT WAIT DON’T SHOOT DON’T-”

“Did I just kill an inanimate object?!”

“OH MY GOD HE KILLED JIMMY THE TALKING PADLOCK!”

“You know, my favorite thing about today is that nothing has happened to us yet.”

“Well, I have a key right here, and it’s called an axe.”

“You think I’m just gonna climb through a secret hole for secrets?!”

“I’m not scared at all...I’m just - I’m not scared...”

“I was getting ready to scream but I guess I’m not going to fall.”

“You know I could’ve used my two-arm perk to get in here, but, I’m being selfish.”

“Ooh we were supposed to bring our DnD dice!”

“I’m going to roll my funny dice, but you don’t have any and you will not be using mine.”

“I’m just gonna. Risky my life and, and walk along this very steep edge.”

*reading broken sign* “ ‘Dan Cliff’. This must be Dan’s Cliff! I wonder where Dan is...”

“This bath water is fucking freezing.”

“Shit, I was gonna watch my SpongeBob on there!”

“HELLO?! How did I get into a movie theater?!”

“Wh...why aren’t you scared?”

“OH NO IT’S THE NON-COPYRIGHTED CHARACTER SIGJAW!”

“Oh shit the bugs got me...”

“Looks like the banishment spell really worked after all.”

“We haven’t had a vibes incursion this bad since, the echidna incident of nineteen-aught-seven.”

“Alright, ya’ll - y’all are chill, thank you so much.”

“GOD IS THAT YOU!?”

“I hate Chutes and Ladders, this is awful.”

“Wow queen, you’re so powerful.”

“Is it hard to climb with this light in your eyes? Is it hard to climb?”

“Oh my god. I’m so happy to be here. Um, my name is [Name], I am, [Age] years old...”

“Please don’t change the channel, it hurts us.”

“I love hearing all these crazy words and sentences.”

“You think they just want to say hello?”

“Did you hear something groan? I hear groaning.”

“Thank god I leveled up my agility skill...”

“He was SAWED in TWAIN. What is wrong with you people?”

“I’M COVERED IN HIS BLOOD!”

“I would love to live in a place like this.”

“No, I’ve never been surrounded by eyeless, plastic simulacrum of human beauty, no.”

“Oh fuck - they NAKEY. THEY NAKEY.”

“I’m getting them, I’m just not laughing because they’re not funny.”

“I want to be so fucking rude to everyone.”

“THIS ACCURSED MOUNTAIN IS KILLING ME!”

“She’s asleep you gotta be quiet-”

“Hi! How do you like my mask? Is it cooolll?”

“Well you know what else sucks? Having a pair of scissors in your shoulderrr!”

“MAYBE if you embrace the VIBES, you’ll live!”

“Rude Mountain is a conflux of negativity in your world. It is the natural disposal site of bad vibes. They go there to die.”

“Your little ritual has thrown the whole world into strife.”

“I have no interest in learning your name - that’s fine, you can keep it to yourself.”

“I’m really stressed, I don’t know if you can tell.”

“Please come get me, I’m so fucking scared.”

“If were to like, punch you sort of hard it would hurt, that is how unarmored you are right now.”

“I have no respect for streamers.”

“I was in the middle of somethiiinngg!”

“Phil Spencer could walk on water...Chuck Norris could swim through land...but I...I could fly through death, bitch.”

“OH I FELL An entire...one and a half feet.”

“Nowhere to go but into the funny cave.”

“I sure hope nobody sets me on fire right about now...”

“I’m really glad you’re alive [Name] but also that’s really fucked up.”

“I’m pretty upset that he’s alive considering everything that he’s done so far.”

“Listen, none of us are leaving until we calm Rude Mountain down...by giving into the VIBES of Rude Mountain!”

“Oh [Name], you fucking moron. The vibes have taught me so much.”

“I’m fucking rude now!”

“I don’t actually know why I’m doing this, I just love violence.”

“I can see past the fourth wall! I can see the comments! They’re so happy for you, [Name].”

“You’re a parody of the real [Name]!”

“You’re smarter than I am, fuck you.”

“The ultimate rudeness: manslaughter.”

“Listen, listen - if you kill me the vibes will only take ya quicker, boyo.”

“ ‘Uh oh you’re just as bad as I am’ - shut the fuck up dude, you don’t know what the hell you’re talking about.”

“I feel like you’re just saying stuff at this point, but that’s pretty cool.”

“You know the rumor, that Cortana jacks off Master Chief in the suit?”

“Whose Mister Chief?”

“Did you hear that? It’s the vibes.”

“I’m in so much pain...”

“This is the worst vacation in the entire universe!”

“You’re on Rude Mountain, home of the vibes!”

“I wanted to be rude to people I didn’t want them to be rude to me!”

“I’m escaping I’m escaping, I’m using my funny little tricks and I’m escaping!”

“Well, good thing nobody left me behind today, or else, y’know, things might have been a little bit easier!”

“Has anybody been dissociating for the past, like, two minutes?”

“It’s alright, just sit down, just sit down.”

“It’s been a weird fucking day, that’s all I can tell you. I want to hear something normal.”

“Are you okay? You sound like you’re having a panic attack.”

“It’s not like it’s me anymore, I’m thinking in terms of ‘[Own Name] is doing this”, I don’t know what’s going on!”

“Hang on, I think someone’s outside.”

“I’m a professional loomer, AND vibe scientist!”

“You’re not ready for it: you’re weak.”

“Those funny guys you saw are the crystallization of the negative energies that people have brought up here.”

“You see a funny guy? You shoot.”

“I, I feel like I need to broaden my horizons at this point.”

“Sneakin’ up behind you~”

“Oh god the curse is getting stronger.”

“I think we should just go home honestly.”

“This mountain fucking sucks.”

“There’s so much going on inside my head you can’t even po - I can’t put it into words.”

“You ever feel like you’re in a different time and place than you are? That you like know you are, even though it feels wrong?”

“It’s okay, we can turn these vibes around!”

“I can’t kill you, you know what I know, I can’t kill you.”

“Well that was fucking awkward.”

“I’m telling - I’m telling you that the, the vibes are taking him.”

“FRIENDSHIP KICK!”

“...This picture looks like a rabbit...”

“Holy shit dog, what the fuck is wrong with you?”

“How are you feeling about everything you’ve done here?”

“They’re seeing the bounds of the universe they live in.”

“I gotta say: real, real sad what happened to ya.”

“You wake up one day, you realise the world you know is... limited, and realise that you knowin' such means you can, play with it, tug on the strings of it. You look at that world and you think yourself some sort of god, don't you, son?...Are you ready to feel the wrath of a god, kid?”

“I-I hear people laughing...what the fuck is happening?”

“I’m gonna kill the next fucking person I see, I swear to God!”

“Hello! Hi! I’m so happy to see youuu!”

“I wish I could stream but I have no opposable thumbs.”

“I’m trying to have a conversation with you, bitch!”

“At this rate, you be one of us realll soooonnn.”

“This is my friendship machete!”

“I’m completely relaxed. I’m totally okay.”

“You really ARE rude, what?”

“Sorry, a bee stung me.”

“Like, I feel like I can’t die. In fact I feel like it’s guaranteed that I’m going see this thing through to the end, so I don’t even care anymore.”

“No, it’s not that you’re getting bad, it’s that I’m getting omnipotent. That’s not your fault.”

“Don’t fucking grab me and maybe I won’t shoot you in the face.”

“Your bullets won’t change the nature of the vibes!”

“[Name] please don’t shoot me - AUGH!”

“I need to get out of here, I need to get out of here!”

“Why...does it hurt so much...”

“Do you guys get the feeling that something bad’s happening to like, other people?”

“Sewer levels are my favorite! You go in there and it’s all stinky and sometimes there’s like, sewer monsters...”

“Did you just lock the door with the gun?”

“[Name] where the fuck have you been? Why did you just leave us?“

“You have no idea what we’re up against...”

“Oh, you think you’re the power of God, don’t you...”

“I see everything...I see everything!”

“I know I’m not real! I know YOU’RE not real!"

“You saw it, right? No, that’s exactly what I’m talking about! You saw what I just saw.”

“This is constructed! Do you understand?”

“You can’t be this - you can’t this fucking obtuse.”

“Listen [Name], you’re asking too many questions. You can’t keep looking into this.”

“No! I’m not connected to my body!”

“I wish they were my friends...”

“I don’t care! You know they’re gonna be fine, right?”

“[Name]. I get it. I understand. You know and I know and we know and there is a understanding.”

“I don’t want to be torn out of my body!”

“I’m not scared, I just know what we can and can’t do.”

“We can go up this way and we can just forget all this happened.”

“Well, I mean, obviously we have to construct this sort of, you know, bit that we’re in, where, we’re outside of the meta sense, and they aren’t.”

“And the tough part is that we also have to make it work within the construct of the story.”

“People don’t understand how much work and time and thought goes into this.”

“Oh, oh, that actually works! Sweet.”

“Man, oh my god, you scared the hell out of me...”

“[Name] - [Alt. Name] - whoever the fuck he is - left me down here...”

“Rude Mountain has been trying to get rid of both of us. Since we got here.”

“Ah-ha, you’re not gonna get the chance...I can hear you! I can smell you...”

“While I’ve been sitting - sitting here for the past hour doing nothing, I’ve seen all the realities.”

“Do you have the shimmy skill?”

“Reality’s falling apart - I gotta do something about this...”

“I literally don’t know where I’m going, I just climbed out of a cave. I’ve been underground for god knows how long, I’m just running in a direction!”

“Why are you trying so hard? Why are you trying so hard to keep things together?”

“I have to put this reality back together!”

“If I don’t fix this? Everything falls apart.”

“I can’t die. You know I can’t die.”

“The vibes of Rude Mountain become so potent...you lose yourself...you lose your memories!”

“There’s a gas leak.”

“This is the climactic ending of the game. [Name], you and I can put an end to this! It’s almost over!”

“[Name] don’t do it, we, we have real lives! I know it doesn’t seem real to you but you can’t!”

“Okay, listen: maybe this is all predetermined...but it’s still giving you a FEW SCARES, RIGHT?!”

“Something changed in you before you left. You lost something.

“THE BAD VIBES ARE POWERFUL! And they can make a monster of men!”

“Alright...it’s up to you [Name]...good luck...”

“Why don’t you open your mouth and try to do some exposition?”

“Really wrapping it all up together in a neat little bow, huh?”

“This was a fun vacation.”

“I learned about myself, and I think that’s what’s most important.”

“I like those guys! I think we should do this EVERY YEAR.”

“Maybe...I should record my podcast...for myself...”

“It’s just, enjoy what you’ve got while you have it, y’know?”

[corpseaten]

i am not too fond of loud noises either. the train tracks are in the woods behind my house, so i think that helps dampen the sound.. you can mostly feel them. aah, i could imagine that being dangerous. i do hope so, it would be nice to live somewhere less reliant on cars.

i shall second you a second ask with many photos! if you think their names are cute, wait until you see them.... i would say gundam is extremely good (in general terms. some of them are not that great. i say that like i have watched many, i have not, my motivation has waned recently), but it is definitely an investment. 45 years worth of shows and movies.. and more every year! that is interesting, ours do not really scream much. i think they view my mom as their mom, which is why they are so attached to her.

ah, good. nodding.... i understand that, sometimes my brain will just not allow me to start something too. that is quite a long time, but at least soundcloud is always there when you need it. aaaahh.

oh my . i think i also had realized about two days ago, or whenever it was that someone else had sent you an ask, saying they were lurking.. it had made me feel so awfully possessive. honestly, i had been thinking of ways to tell you since, but i could not decide how to go about it. i did notice, but i did not want to be too selfish and assume.... aw, that is quite cute. of course i will continue to give them to you, as long as you want them. it makes me very happy that you have been thinking of me as well..

i, admittedly, tend to do the same whenever i receive a response back from you.. and thank you for the support, it is a Lot, but your words really do help. right now all we really can do is wait. 

Ahhh . . . yes, that would muffle them a bit, mine were right outside of my garden, so, it was always very close to me, it was the worst, I’m sure there are plenty of places you do not need a car in . . i live in one, at least.

I have not opened the other ask yet, but I cannot wait to see, ahh! I love cats. There are multiple gundams? That is a little confusing . . tilts head. 45 years!!!!!!! That is so many years. Is there not a point where you stop and think maybe this is enough. Awww! My cat sees himself as the highest being in the house I believe . . . he does not listen to anyone and disrupts anything whenever he can . . in a way he Is mother.

My brain often wont let me consume new media, I try my hardest and it shuts me down ! I think is because I no longer have the capacity to like many new things outside of people . . . mental illness my beloathed. I love piracy so sometimes I will just download them from youtube and important them onto my Phone if they do not put a song I like up.

Aaaaaah is that so? It’s quite cute that we realised around the same time, isn’t it? You got jealous of that ? Interesting . . I’ll be sure to remember. I wonder . . . Do you want me all to yourself, your highness ? Whichever way you had told me, I would have reacted in this way — whenever you have that kind of thought . . I ask you to tell me. You can safely assume now, they are about you. I remember you posted something..that was similar to what you sent in my inbox, about being unable to use your words . . I had a suspicion that was aimed at me, if I am honest. I do want them, really, more than anything.

I’m glad you do, we are both in the same boat it appears . . . i wouldn’t mind being stranded out in the ocean with you though. I suppose you are right, just know my shoulder will always be here for you to rest your head on.