#but message me so we can talk more!!!

[perseephony]

as another kaladin enthusiast : hiiiii! i love how much you love him!! i'm cracking up because you mentioned having an album of just kaladin art and i was like hey!!! SAME! anyway i hope you're having a great day :)

also, i would loove to hear more of your thoughts on moash and kaladin and how they dealt with pain! that post was so interesting. you don't have to elaborate if you don't want to. it's just such a poignant take i didn't even consider, because I've been sympathetic to moash post row. but now it's recontextualizing a lot for me.

Ahhh this such an amazing question! I have so many thoughts about Moash & Kaladin but since I’ve just finished Wind and Truth, I feel like I may not be able to articulate them very well, so sorry if this sounds jumbled or ramble-y. Also if you haven’t finished W&T, I feel like I could enter spoilerish territory with some stuff here so please don’t read on if you don’t want to!! I’d love to talk about this more with you and hear more about your thoughts!! ❤️❤️

Honestly we didn’t see much of Moash in W&T, and what we did see was basically him giving in fully to the Vyre persona. I feel like before this, it was easier for me to sympathize with because, yes, he was a coward, but choosing to avoid experiencing pain and guilt is an understandable decision, even if it is weak and cowardly. That positions him as opposed to Kaladin, who experiences pain and guilt and accepts it, but does not let it define him. But in W&T it’s kind of a 180, and I’m still trying to figure out how i feel about it. Moash accepts his pain but instead of using it as fuel to do better, like Kaladin and even Teft, Moash sees his pain as an excuse which feels even more cowardly to me idk!

That being said! I really really hate how Kaladin is portrayed as a “good victim” of oppression and is constantly told to give up on his hatred and anger for the ruling class. I especially hate how Moash is portrayed as super evil, partially because he gives in to his hurt and rage. I suppose this is another way in which we’re meant to see them as opposites: Kaladin hates lighteyes, but accepts his duty to protect and sticks to his oaths no matter what, whereas Moash completely gives in to his hatred and never chooses control or mitigation. He’s either all passion, or completely passion-less.

[dykedvonte]

You ever just see a Mouthwashing take that makes you want to bang your head into a wall? I literally just saw someone claim Curly couldn't have been emotionally abused by Jimmy before the crash because he was in a higher position of power than Jimmy.

-Shrimp Anon

The mouthwashing fandom has shown me that people genuinely do believe that certain types of abuse are not as detrimental as other types especially when they deem those immune/resistant, ergo, believing one is objectively worse no matter how it affects the person nor the intersections of power, history and dynamics at play.

Get ready cause this is a yap session:

Cause like it's heavily implied that Curly and Jimmy's friendship was toxic and abusive, pointedly in the direction of how Jimmy uses Curly's belief/comfort in him. Curly wasn't forced to enable Jimmy but he was emotional and mentally on edge around him in almost every scene in some way. Mental and emotional abuse are not contingent on what positions you have at work. Yeah, he's Jimmy's boss but he was Jimmy's friend first and it's like getting into Psych discussion to talk about how social power tends to overshadow any perceived organizational power in the human mind. People are concerned about their jobs ofc but they tend to hang onto and put more value/investment into their personal relationships, hence why there tends to be laws and restrictions around mixing the two.

I always see the sentiments that "Curly is a grown ass man", "Curly is bigger than Jimmy", "Curly is Jimmy's boss", "He just needed a backbone" as criticisms of Curly and while I do agree that on the surface level all of these to be true and viable ways Curly could've taken more control of the situation, I often look at the parallels of Anya and Curly as victims of Jimmy pre/post crash.

The way Jimmy talks to Anya post crash is how he talked to Curly in the pre-crash segments. It's hard to pin-point mainly because we know he hates and wants nothing to do with Anya compared to his contrary but similarly handled obsessions with Curly. It's a weird sort of "honey-moon" effect of abuse Jimmy does in terms of emotional and mental victimization. He is always horrid to Anya, always talking down or questioning her abilities and thoughts in a situation, this of course includes the harassment and assault. However, he has a moment of attempted gentleness/conditioning when he question her about the mouthwash when she's contemplating drinking it at the table. The key difference is he has no personal investment in Jimmy outside wanting nothing to do with him, meaning there is no sort of romanticized version of him that he can condition her off of. He knows this, hence, why he always reverts to trying to make her to scared to oppose him.

This sort of give and take of "kindness" doesn't work on her because she knows he is just doing it to take more from her than whatever he could possibly give but it reflects even the "softer" scenes between him and Curly where he always rewords or rephrases Curly's sentiments and concerns to sound more shallow. He is feigning a deeper understanding by reworking Curly's emotions into something bad and needing to be hidden. Everything is laced with envy and resentment, an outburst just around the corner, I mean he even slams the table in the birthday party scene, a tactic in emotional manipulation to set the victim on edge and cloud their ability to respond. Even if Curly knows Jimmy won't get physical in that moment, the physical actions is intended to make him back down in the confrontation in case it does. This is something that is just not person specific. It ingrains itself into how you interact with the world and life and it shows in major and minor ways with Curly.

Post-crash, the abusive nature is more in tandem to the physical victimization Anya went through and the stripping of voice and autonomy we see take place. Like the parasite in HFIM, Jimmy speaks for Curly most of the time and puts words in his mouth, similarly to how he takes Anya's plans as his own. He very commonly, with the both of them mind you, supplements the worst aspects of himself into them; pettiness, selfishness, lack of understanding... And tries to cover himself with their best qualities; kindness, planning, initiative, etc...

These parallel are just to say that positional power has little to do with if a person can be abused and how it can even be flipped to further the abuse. There is no doubt that Curly could've picked up on Jimmy's envy of his position hence another reason he never confronted him as a Captain but as a friend as doing so would immediately put Jimmy in a space to be confrontational/combative.

I think the disdain some people have when they talk about the heavily implied if not implicitly stated emotional/mental abuse Curly experienced being Jimmy's friend is when treating it as an excuse to why he didn't do more. I can understand that completely because it is not an excuse to why he didn't do more but is a very real reason people in his position in these scenarios can experience whether in the context of a work or social environment. However, I also think the way people talk about it really does demonstrate a bigger problem when talking about abuse when somehow who is/was abused is either part of the issue or enabled it.

Harkening back to the sentiments about Curly's inaction regarding Jimmy, I think the exact phrases I used/have seen show how there is an inherent belief that it is easier to overpower the effects of emotional/mental abuse that go in tandem with the perception of Curly as someone who should be able to. There is not an age you suddenly stop being susceptible to abuse nor a set point or low where you realize how it has affected you. You don't suddenly know to stand up or put a face on to face your abuser nor admit that you inadvertently enabled them to subjugate someone else to the same treatment. Maybe it's my psych brain but their is this growing belief that direct action is somehow easy or always the best method with the game shows you instances where it is not always the case. In real life that rings true too. He should have done more, but it's not impossible to see why he struggled to find a way or didn't even if it makes us mad.

It's not easy to suddenly gain a "back-bone". You don't immediately want to resort to aggression, especially if it mirrors the type you were a victim to. You don't want to believe you allowed yourself to be treated this bad, let it get that bad or allowed something bad to happen to someone else. It is easy to be in denial, to retreat to your thoughts or make excuses to avoid the painful truth. It's frustrating but in a way we know is relatable. It why we both hate and love Curly for it. We know we'd be better, we think we'd be better, we like to think we wouldn't falter in the same ways but it's always easier to say that from the outside looking in. It's easy to see what he was doing wrong because we are seeing it, not him, but the game really does make you picture what you would do if this was your raw reality and it's why this debate about Curly seems so never ending/contradictory. We can all say what we'd do but bottom line is that's much different when you're in the moment with all the emotions and human feelings attached.

I personally think Mouthwashing tackles the themes of rape culture, enabling, toxic masculinity, types of abuse and patriarchy in ways that are meant to deconstruct the typical straightforward views we mostly have of these concepts and how little subtilities of them are just as, if not more, detrimental than the overt/obvious parts. The game deals with the idea of little details and bigger picture in a way to show that sometimes the bigger picture is not the issue but the little details that make it up. It's why I have a personal dislike of depictions of Jimmy as the typical horrible person who would of course do something like this because the game is about noticing the little warning signs, the foreshadowing and foresight.

It's why I dislike the typical discussion of "bro code" and "boys will be boys" for the game because the game makes a point to avoid the standard depictions of such. It is about the type of men who still enable despite not condoning, agreeing or even perpetuating harmful beliefs because they can't see the little details or the ways it seeps into their everyday. The severity is not obvious to them as it was not obvious to Curly, Swansea or even Daisuke the way it was to a woman like Anya. There are little details about Jimmy that should ring alarms but if you are too naive like Daisuke, too distant like Swansea or too conditioned like Curly, they are just off markers.

There is 100% more constructive/concise ways to say "Curly was a victim of Jimmy's abuse on an emotional and mental aspect that clouded his judgements and perceptions in the scenario" while also critiquing on the side of "Curly still had a responsibility to protect Anya as a crew mate and Captain that he failed to do due to biases and stigma's he failed to surpass" without the weird condemnation people give him about should've knowing better than to let himself be manipulated by a person he considered a close, if not family/best-friend and had his own reasons to trust initially. Also stop being weird about victims of abuse in general with this fandom, like sorry not everyone has a like social epiphany the moment someone's nasty to them. People are treating it like you immediately know when you are in a toxic relationship immediately or comprehend when a person is actively dangerous and either it's your fault for not knowing how to leave/cut them off or you deserve it. Like the hypocrisy of people believing how certain fans treat the story reflect their irl views but not their own is crazy.

End statement is: I honestly don't even know man, I've been writing this too long and just like no man on that ship was perfect or really helped Anya when it mattered and I feel like pitting them against each other in discussion on who did the least or most or how it was justified sucks cause in the end Anya always did the most and best thing for herself.

[ink-the-artist]

forgive me if you've been asked this before or if its annoying, but how did you learn to use colored pencils like that? your art is so special to me.

ty :) I took an art class for a few years where our teacher had us buy prismacolor pencils as one of the art supplies and had us use them kinda like paints, pressing down hard right away and blending the colors together. its not how youre supposed to use them she was just trying to teach us to use color and ig this was more to the point. I picked them up again years after i stopped going to that class just bc they were there and i wanted to play around w them a bit and ended up actually enjoying it when doing it on my own terms lol

[necrotic-nephilim]

in lieu of having posted any writing/headcanons/asks in the past few days because i have been *so* busy and unable to do anything fandom-related which is terrible and evil, i have a poll out of morbid curiosity and self-indulgence. i've been meaning to ramble here about how i feel about DC's lack fo Deaf representation and which Batfam members i would personally make Deaf, but i am mildly curious about the larger opinion and now i will subject you all to the question, i would love to hear thoughts/opinions/headcanons on any specific choices. (would love d/Deaf/HoH opinions esp but i'm mostly expecting this to reach the hearing crowd, so opinions from hearing ppl are ones i'm very curious about. if you've never given it thought before you are going to now or else /lh)

[lycanthian]

they need to make a way to interact with mutuals that isnt scary

[scoriarose]

Psst, other snake caretakers

I have an idea for April Fools-

who wants in? Private message me for deets.

[quietlyblooms]

i love that i just made that post but then feel very shy as i ask: is anyone wanting to ship?

[street-corner-felines]

Zero Day (2002)

[ducktracy]

Does it ever feel pressuring (no pun intended) to work on a show with such a legacy and history as SpongeBob?

VERY much so, but in a good way, if such a thing exists! one of our mantras on our little storyboard plussing team is “pressure makes diamonds” and it is a very applicable saying

when i first started, i was TEEEEERRRIFIED! i really felt like i had no idea what i was doing, and there have been so many times where i’ve turned in a section and genuinely thought “oh my god they’re gonna fire me for this it’s so bad.” working in animation is frazzling enough! but not only are we working on a cultural mecca, with not only the kids of today to entertain, impress and inspire, but to maintain the integrity of the series and entertain/impress/inspire the kids like us who grew up with the show, we are also working with literal animation legends and animation veterans!! it’s pretty surreal to be working on the same show as someone like Bob Camp, who’s been in the industry for 40+ years… and even more surreal when he says he’s a big fan of your work 😵‍💫‼��‼️‼️‼️

THANKFULLY, i’ve made a lot of strides in curbing some of my storyboarding stage fright. it used to be really bad when i started, like genuinely panic attack inducing! the constant patience and guidance and encouragement of my peers and consistent practice from these past three years have really allowed me to grow and blossom. now, when i feel a bit claustrophobic in remembering the pure scale of what we’re doing, i weaponize it for good!!

i think of how inspired and amazed and obsessed with SpongeBob i was as a kid. how it inspired me to draw, how i remember drawing along to episodes and commercial breaks. my brother and his wife are both elementary school teachers and routinely update me about how their kids are still crazy for SB (and they both brag about me to their kids heheh). i think of all the kids watching, all the kids realizing that getting to draw these characters and interact with them and live in their world is something you indeed can do, all the kids who religiously catch each new episode like i once did… it just fills me with so much confidence and hope and love, and that motivates me to deliver and do my best and try to do what i can to help make each episode be better and more fun than the last

SpongeBob is for everyone, obviously! that’s one of the great things i love about working on it: i get just as much enjoyment watching our finished episodes as our target audience. but i do bring up the kids particularly often because, at the end of the day, that is who we are doing it for and i also just can’t help but think back to how my SpongeBob obsessed self as a kid would have had her world rocked to know i’m doing what i’m doing. i want to give those kids, who i used to be and still essentially am, the same joy and spark and all consuming inspiration i felt and still do

there are definitely some days where the gravity of what we’re doing hits harder than others! some days are a lot more difficult than others. this is an absolute dream job, i’m not just saying that, i always fantasized about maybe one day being able to work my way up to working on SpongeBob and now it’s my first animation job—but it is very easy to get overwhelmed by just how big of a legacy we’re carrying on our shoulders! how many other mega talented people work on this show! there’s a lot to juggle. but we juggle it well. there is so much love and heart and care poured into this show. we do everything we can to maintain the integrity of the characters and the show’s core, and it just makes me love what i do all the more and makes me more determined to do it

TLDR: YES! but i’m much better off for it, because it reminds me of why we’re working so hard to begin with. we all want this show to be the best it can—to maintain its core 25 years later, but still have fun doing it. i mentioned this on Twitter, but when i met Bill Fagerbakke last month he was saying how cool it is that fans who grew up with the show are now able to work on it and i couldn’t agree more. it’s the greatest honor imaginable being able to carry such a monumental torch, and i hope i’m able to keep at it for a long, long time.

[bleue-flora]

I didn't say they don't believe in the staged finale, but they think it's a retcon. A retcon is when something is added to the story that contradicts past information, rewriting it, so they think the finale was originally real and c!dream wanted to do all that, and only closer to the prison break, cc!dream decided to change that part of the plot or something

and it's funny because theories about the discs finale being staged started popping up literally right after that stream and a lot of c!inniters were making fun of or even harassing people who were creating such theories, and also, the content creators themselves admitted that it wasn't a retcon and that a limited circle of people knew about it, it was just kept a secret from everyone. I just really think it's pointless to talk to people who thinks everything is about c!tommy and who think that all of c!dream's actions are centered around c!tommy, that, well, they continue to believe that even though it's refuted by the plot and by the content creators and by the people who love and analyze the character.

it's just, ugh, what kind of conversation can you have with someone who believes that c!dream is a one-dimensional character who was only written to be obsessed with c!tommy and be the "perfect villain" for the "perfect victim", who believes that all characters are just an extension of c!tommy because to them c!tommy is all that matters in the plot. it's simple, these people hate dream smp and they don't care about the efforts of content creators to create interesting multifaceted characters, they are only interested in c!tommy. you can't get a sane dialogue from a person whose brain is so washed that he believes in the stupidest conspiracy theory in the world, and with some c!tommy fans the same🤷‍♂️

[context a & b]

Kinda the same thing isn’t it? Eh whatever. Regardless, you make a good point though I’d stray away from derogatory terms when talking about people’s opinions even if they aren’t based on fact. It’s honestly less of a conspiracy theory and more just ignoring the truth. Conspiracy theories are somewhat based on the unknown, in this case all the info we get comes from the same place - so you either believe streams and the cc!s and lore they make or you don’t and if you don’t then that’s not a “theory” that’s just an opinion based on misinformation and the lack of truth. Which you are right is rather unproductive to discuss if we can’t agree on the facts, but also we are on a public platform so I kinda see it as also having the discussion with all the other 400 something notes lol. Anyways, even if it was rather unproductive, I kinda came out learning something new and thinking about something in a new way, so I had fun which is the whole point of being here anyways. :)

Now what is kinda funny to me is this whole retcon, rewrite, discounting lore thing anyways, because for example c!Dream was originally supposed to fight with Pogtopia but because everyone was joining their side, cc!Dream had to switch to balance it out so they can even have a war at all and created the revive book so that it made sense for his character. So one of the moments I see used against c!Dream to show he is heartless and doesn’t care about friendship and stuff, is actually more so an instance of a rewrite… and yet we all take it at face value and base whole arguments on it, because at the end of the day, it is the lore we have. What’s interesting to me, is that part of the fun of the Dream smp is that it’s a mess, something cc!Tommy talked about recently. A mess, I personally like to take and look at things in a way to see if there are ways and angles where things can make more sense. That’s part of the fun of this crazy story telling. It’s why I started writing fanfiction in the first place, to fill in gaps or plot holes in lore. If you want a structured story more so centered around a protagonist’s specific suffering then go read Harry Potter (not to reduce that story to just that of course don’t come after me that’s not the point). But to take out things or not look at certain things in the context of other things that happened because they don’t follow the less messy dream smp timeline you’ve created in your mind, is to defeat the point. What will you decide wasn’t intended next, if Tommy burning down Tubbo’s house isn’t important, if staged finale wasn’t supposed to be a thing, then what about Tommy finding Techno’s house, didn’t cc!Techno say how that wasn’t supposed to happen? What about the revival book experiments, they were from a video not even a stream can I say those are a retcon and unimportant since the timeline doesn’t even make sense and actively contradicts itself? What about Tommy’s beach party, could the ccs just not come so they had to improvise and rewrite it so it’s empty on purpose? Like why are we deciding was is and isn’t lore or important lore? You wouldn’t discount a book or movie or tv show because it doesn’t make sense, you’d either try and understand how to make it sense or rewrite what you think would have been better - but at that point it is fanfiction it is your world now, you can do anything you want there but that doesn’t make it canon. Honestly to look at the dsmp as anything less than its entirety is a disrespect to the Tommy, to Dream, to Technoblade and everybody else c!s and cc!s alike. And that’s why I reblogged in the first place, because I felt like it was disrespectful to Technoblade and that felt very wrong to me. You can slander Dream all you want, but don’t discount or take away from part of Technoblade’s legacy.

[artnerd1123]

Finally watched tadc ep 4 and ;_;

Gangle……..

(Spoiler talk in the tags)

[ginjithewanderer]

[Tetora Nagumo] What I Like 4☆ — The Back of a Man Among Men

Writer: Nishioka Maiko || Season: Winter Character appearances: Tetora, Arashi

"What about you, Tetora-kun? Have you found anything you like yet?"

Translation under the cut

Tetora: Hmhmhmm…♪ I’m back~

Arashi: Oh? Tetora-kun, welcome back.

Arashi: Are you done with work already? You're back surprisingly early. Didn't you say you might be late? I thought for sure that you wouldn’t be back until late at night.

Tetora: Ossu. That's what I thought, too, but I got done earlier than I expected~

Arashi: I see. Well, I'm glad you got done without any troub—

Arashi: Kyaah!

Tetora: Woah!? Wh-what's wrong? You startled me just yelling all of a sudden, y'know?

Arashi: Tetora-kun, this is bad! Your ear! Your earlobe!

Tetora: Huh?

Arashi: Your earlobe is bleeding!

Tetora: Hm…?

Tetora: Ah, it really is. My piercing hasn't healed all the way yet, so I guess it might be bleeding because my earring got caught on my clothes or something.

Arashi: Uh-uh. You can't just wipe it off so casually like that! What if it gets infected!?

Arashi: Okay. Come here. I'll give you a hot soak.

Tetora: H-'hot soak'…? What's that? It sounds kinda like 'hot soup' in English, so I guess it's something yummy?

Arashi: Nope. A hot soak is when you use warm salt water on the affected area to help it heal better.

Arashi: Piercings are delicate, so you can't use regular disinfectants.

Arashi: Don't worry, this won't hurt. Come on, come here and sit still.

Tetora: Ossu. I'll take you up on that, then.

Arashi: Dab, dab…And, there.

Arashi: Oh? This earring…It's not the one you usually wear, is it?

Tetora: Ah, yeah. Today's work was kinda formal, so I wore this clear one that isn't really visible from a distance.

Tetora: I wonder if this piercing is even worth it for me if it’ll keep getting caught in my clothes~. It probably started bleeding because it got caught on something in a weird way.

Arashi: Hmm, that is strange. I wonder if it keeps getting caught on things because you’re not used to it yet.

Arashi: You can’t take the earring out until it heals up, though, or the hole will close up…

Arashi: I know. How about we go shopping for new ones the next time we’re free? I’ve been meaning to look for some small ones for myself, too.

Arashi: I can recommend you a shop, but would you be okay with that?

Tetora: Oh. Can I? If it’s one you recommend, I wanna go, too!

Arashi: That’s decided, then ♪ Let’s go out the next time we’re free.

Arashi: Kyaah ♪ All of them are so cute. With this many choices, I’ll never be able to decide.

Arashi: Oh, well~. Even though there are so many cute things, I want to save money this month…They’re all so tempting.

Arashi: Ah, I can’t get distracted and have fun on my own like this. I’m not here to shop for myself today.

Arashi: What about you, Tetora-kun? Have you found anything you like yet?

Tetora: U~myu. Let me think…Ah, these are nice and simple.

Tetora: I like this kinda thing, but I don’t know how fashionable they are…

Tetora: I don’t really have much of a fashion sense. That’s why I wanna hear your opinion. What do you think of these?

Arashi: Hey. You don’t need to worry about every little thing like that. After all, the most important part of fashion is wearing what you like!

Arashi: Besides, it’s not like you don’t have a good fashion sense. These earrings are nice, aren’t they? I think they’ll suit you.

Tetora: You think so? If they have your seal of approval, I’ll get them~♪ That said, which ones do you like, Narukami-senpai?

Arashi: Me? Well—

Arashi: I like these, and earrings like these are nice, too…Ah, these! I like these ones. Mmm, it’s too bad I can’t buy them. I’ll have to come back when I have some more money.

Arashi: Oh, well, that’s okay. Our main goal today was to get you some earrings. We did achieve that.

Tetora: Ossu. I’ll go pay for these, then!

Arashi: Okaaay, see you in a bit. I’ll go look around that clothing store over there. Please do call out to me once you’re done.

Arashi: I’m so glad you could find something you like.

Tetora: Ossu! It’s just as I’d expect from a store you like. All the accessories there were designed really well. It was really neat.

Tetora: I wanna go there again. Thank you so much!

Arashi: Hehe. Just hearing you say that makes it feel worth recommending it to you.

Tetora: —Also, here.

Arashi: Huh? What’s this package?

Tetora: It’s thanks for today. I’m sorry it’s so small.

Arashi: Huh!? You don’t need to thank me, though!

Arashi: But…thank you. I’m glad. Is it okay if I open it?

Tetora: Of course!

Arashi: —Oh, my! These are the earrings I liked from that store! When did you…

Tetora: Heheh. I’m not great at giving presents, so I wasn’t sure what would be good enough as thanks, but…

Tetora: Obviously, you’d want to give anyone something they’d like, right? That’s why I didn’t buy anything beforehand. I just quietly did my research and bought these earlier.

Arashi: …You’re amazing, Tetora-kun.

Tetora: Huh? Did you say something, Narukami-senpai?

Tetora: Ah! Are these not good enough as a thank you!?

Arashi: Nope. Not at all. I’m really happy with these. Thank you so much. I’ll treasure them ♪

Tetora: I’m really glad you like them! Let’s go home, then.

Arashi: (Mm~…And I thought you were still just a cute junior. I really look forward to what the future holds for you…♪)

Tetora: ? Narukami-senpai, what’s wrong~? You almost got left behind, y’know~?

Arashi: Yeah, yeah. I’m coming, Tetora-kun!

[bunnyboy-juice]

spent the first hour and change at work deleting some old files and am having a grand ol time laughing at myself for not realizing i was a lesbian sooner

[nyan-bynary]

I'm gonna have to wait out a few weeks to be able to complain about jjk's ending bc rn half the ppl are bashing everyone who expected more as ppl who just wanted gojo back

[rouge-fauna]

I think you’re talking about these posts [here & here], I don’t know if there have been others.

I'm not gonna say what I did was right, you are correct I should probably just not respond to asks getting me to talk about other people. I will say for these two posts those people had already blocked me I’m pretty sure, so it’s kinda hard to talk directly to them in that case. And I was not doing so anonymously and had not blocked them so I wasn’t hiding what I was saying. I did not follow them, I am not part of the innitor community, and not that that makes it right but I do think it is kinda different. Though you make a good point, perhaps we should stop this pattern of responding to asks about other blogs and such.

Still, the biggest thing to me I realized, back in elementary school when I first dealt with this, was that honestly all the time we talk about people behind their back. Talking about people when they aren’t always in the room is kinda just inevitable and part of socializing, however I think the important part is how you are talking about other people. It’s when you are insulting them, talking negatively about them to people they know, spreading false information and so on that it becomes not okay. Hopefully that makes sense.

In these cases I merely focused on the lore. I didn’t insult them or talk shit about them, as a person, as a blog or say their takes were stupid or they are stupid or speculate about their trauma or mental history. I just talked about reasons why I disagreed, or saw things differently and why we might see things differently. They were also not the only ones I saw to say similar things so I think in my mind I was making more of a general discussion, not trying to target them specifically. I didn’t post beyond that about them. But you are right, regardless it was probably not the right way to go about things.

But just to be clear, if I am a hypocrite it is not my intention. I haven’t vague blogged anyone or meant to vague reblog anyone. I think this week is pretty much the first time I’ve ever been not naming, passive aggressively talking about blogs, and even then I’m not trying to insult them, trying to cancel them. I’m just expressing that before you go off about how I’m stupid and unable to have a discussion about it, the very least you could’ve done was give me an opportunity to try.

[j-esbian]

i lost the post but i saw someone talking about how some of y’all act like being weird is a choice and like. YEAHHHHHHH.

that’s fine, it might be for you. but i just live like this and don’t know any other way. like yeah i’ve worked customer service, i can do innocuous small talk, but anything beyond that, i don’t understand what i’m missing. and it’s frustrating to see the tonal disconnect especially from people who are like “uwu embrace weirdness!!” where they’re like. dressing quirky and talking about bugs and listening to obscure music and eschewing small talk to ask Deep Questions on the first date and unlearning their tendency to not infodump. and generally have an idea of what Weirdness is supposed to look like. idk man some of us wake up and get out of bed and can’t figure out why the rest of their coworkers chitchat with each other but when they join the conversation it dies.

weirdness is value neutral. let’s stop trying to turn it into a badge because quite frankly, it’s not a choice for everyone. it’s fucking exhausting to never be on the same wavelength as other people and they’re going to react the way they do and label you the way they will without any conscious actions on your end. it’s difficult to talk about this without feeling like you’ll be dismissed as immature, a teenager whining “no one understands me” but the thing is. sometimes you don’t grow out of feeling alone and different, and there’s no good way to talk about it without feeling like people will think you’re just fishing for pity.