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Interview with my Ex - Bang Chan Oneshot Fanfic
General Masterlist
Request me a story
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Pairing: Bang Chan (Stray Kids) x OC/Reader (Story is written in 2nd person, OC is called Eun-ji)
Genre: light angst, strangers to lovers to exes (to lovers?)
Word Count: 8.8k
Warnings: swearing, non-explicit mentions of mature themes
Summary:
You have been invited to participate in a show titled ‘Interview with my Ex’ together with Bang Chan. Will you go and confront him for breaking up with you one year ago, or will you miss out on this opportunity?
This is just a story that doesn’t describe Bang Chan or other mentioned Stray Kids’ members true characters in any way. It’s just a product of my imagination and should be treated as such.
This story is also on Wattpad (click here) and AO3 (click here)
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A/N: As any other writer out there, I would appreciate reblogs and your comments on this story. Please let me know if you enjoyed it, and most importantly, have fun!
© all rights reserved by skzhocomments (Tumblr), skzho (Tumblr)/ storminsidemycore (Wattpad), storminsidemycore (AO3)
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Interview with my Ex
---
What the heck is this?
Your eyes are stuck on the screen, unable to believe the E-mail you’ve just received.
---
“PROPOSAL to Mrs. Eun-ji Park
You have been invited to participate in our show titled ‘Interview with my Ex’ together with Bang Christopher Chan.
The show is scheduled to be filmed on XX.XX.XXXX. You will be able to talk openly to your ex about your relationship and your break-up through a series of questions we’ve prepared.
Please let us know if you are interested in this proposal and if you are available.
Thank you,
The ‘Truth Behind The Scenes’ Team”
---
Reading through the lines, your eyes widen in shock.
You look up the E-mail address the message came from and find that not only is it legit, but they have a YouTube channel with millions of subscribers, which would explain why your ex – Chan – would be invited to it and would want to participate.
Although you haven’t kept up with what he’s been doing, you know that he is preparing to release an album to launch his solo career, and he’d probably want to promote it as much as possible.
But still, isn’t it a bit cruel to invite you to something like this? Would he really promote this album at your expense, after knowing how much he’s hurt you?
It’s been more than a year since you’ve broken up, but still, your heart still hurts whenever you read his name. You don’t think you’d be able to face him without feeling pain creeping in from every crevice of your body.
You miss him terribly, and ever since he left, you weren’t able to fill the hole he left behind. Once in a while, you wonder if he’s ever tried reaching out and you almost unblock his number, but quickly change your mind because the possibility of talking to him again scares you.
You are scared of your heart swelling up with hope in your chest again, you are scared of confessing that he was the best thing that’s ever happened to you, and you are scared he most likely doesn’t feel the same.
Still, you are curious. Maybe it wouldn’t be a bad idea to participate in this show – to talk to him more or less openly about the whys and the hows, so you eventually decide to reply to the message, and you clear up your work schedule for that day.
~
As the day approaches, you get more and more anxious about having to see him. Initially, you decide to dress to the nines, to show him what he’s been missing out on, but the more dresses you try on, the more uncomfortable you feel.
Why should you try to be someone you’re not just to try and impress a man who’s left you?
You shouldn’t.
You don’t care to impress him anymore. You should just be you, and you should wear something you’re feeling good in, even if that’s just a plain black shirt and some matching black jeans and shoes.
You decide to do your make-up as you’d usually do for work – a soft glam paired with a glossy lip balm, and glancing once more in the mirror, you sigh to yourself and get out of your apartment, taking the bus until you reach the address you’ve received in the last message the Truth Behind the Scenes team sent you.
As you reach the filming studio, someone takes you inside a room with a table and two chairs, and Chan is already there with his back turned to you, speaking with someone you don’t recognise.
Your heart skips a beat at the sight of him, and you hesitate for a little while, but eventually decide to approach the table with a soft smile.
“Hey.” You say, and seeing you, Chan immediately stands up and smiles brightly.
“Hey! I wasn’t sure you’d show up.” He chuckles, taking you into a hug, and oh, how much you missed his embrace, even if it’s short.
“Yeah, I wasn’t sure either.” You reply honestly. “But here I am. So, how does this work?”
“Well, I thought we would have a conversation of some sort, but apparently there’s some questions on those cards each of us has to draw from those two boxes-” he points towards the table, “and the other has to reply.”
“I see.” You nod and sit down, and he follows soon after.
The team instructs you to draw the first card, and as you do, you begin reading:
“How did we meet?”
“Oh, alright. Well…”
---
Rubbing his tired eyes, Chan looked in the corner of his computer screen and cursed out loud when he noticed how late it already was.
3:52 AM.
“Shit.” He leaned back and closed his eyes tightly, and when he opened them again, they started stinging.
He rubbed them again while contemplating if he should go back to the dorms or just sleep on the sofa in the studio. Although uncomfortable, it would do until tomorrow at 10 when he’d have to be back to the building.
After some more minutes and deep breaths used to try and calm him down, he eventually decided against sleeping on the sofa and getting God knows how many neck cramps in the morning when he’d wake up.
He got up and shut down his computer and his laptop, of course after making sure a million times that he’s saved the progress made on the track in the past few hours of the night. He had a good feeling about this new song, even though it would probably not see the light of day in a few years.
Still, it’s better to work in advance and be prepared, especially in an industry as competitive as the one he works in.
Walking into the hallway, he eventually reached the elevators and called one of them. He glanced one more time left and right, and made his way inside, thinking of how peaceful the company is so late into the night. This was probably the only thing he enjoyed about staying up late cramped in his studio: the quietness, the emptiness, the fact that he can take the elevator all the way down uninterrupted-
“Oh.” A woman’s voice pulled him out of his trance, as he stood bewildered looking at the elevator’s doors that opened on the 6th floor. “Wasn’t expecting someone else to be up and about at this time.” The woman continued, and Chan smiled out of courtesy.
You got in and pressed the button to close the doors, and the elevator started moving again, until it suddenly came to a halt.
The lights followed, leaving you in complete darkness.
“What the fuck…” Chan mumbled, taking his phone out of his pocket.
What a great day to have 2%.
He turned the flashlight on, nonetheless.
“Is this a blackout?” You contemplated out loud. “Ouch.”
“Oh, I’m sorry!” Chan apologised, putting the flashlight down. He unintentionally blinded the poor woman. “Yeah, I think so.”
“Great.”
“Tell me about it… What do we do?”
“Is there anyone you could call to tell them we’re here? I forgot my phone on my desk. Shit.”
“Yeah, let me try and call my manager. He’ll probably kill me tomorrow morning for interrupting his precious sleep, but he’s our only hope.”
“Okay.”
Chan searched up his manager’s name and dialled his number, but before the call could connect, the phone shut down.
“No more battery.”
“No way. Are you fucking kidding me?” You asked, but despite the harsh words, there was no annoyance in your tone. Instead, Chan was able to hear slight amusement.
“I always charge it.” He mumbled once more under his breath.
“Do you think the power went out in the whole building, or is it just the elevator?”
“Hmm. Not sure. Probably the whole building.”
“So, we’re stuck.” You concluded, and Chris started hearing a slight shuffle. “Might as well be comfortable. I’m down here.”
“On the floor?”
“No, dummy. On the ceiling.” You laughed.
“Okay, okay. It’s 4 AM, be a bit more lenient on me for the stupid questions.” Chan laughed as well and sat down, hoping he wouldn’t accidentally sit on you.
“I’m Eun-ji, by the way.”
“Chris.”
“Nice to meet you, Chris.”
“What are you doing here so late?”
“Same as you, probably. Working.”
“Damn, what department are you in?” He asked, trying to keep the conversation going.
“Financing.” You shrugged, although you knew he wasn’t able to see you.
“I see. I’m from Stray Kids.”
“Yeah, I know.” You chuckled at the absurdity of the situation. Of course you knew, since you were up so late because of this guy and his team’s never-ending resources for their million albums, merch and tours.
“Really? How so?” He asked, as if taken aback.
“Uhm, I mean… you’re one of the stars of the company I work for. It would be kind of weird to not know, don’t you think?” You asked plainly.
“I guess so, yeah…”
“So, do you think we’d be here for long?”
“God, I hope not. I’m so tired I could sleep right here.”
“Do it, then.” You shrugged again. “Do you want to put your head in my lap to be more comfortable?”
“What?”
“I asked, do you want to put your head-”
“No, I heard what you asked.” Chris chuckled. “I was just taken aback.”
“Well, you don’t have to. It was just a solution to the problem.”
“Then, you should be the one to do it and get some sleep, I bet you’re as tired as me.” He countered.
“No, I’m fine. Sure, I’m tired, but I have a day off tomorrow, so I can sleep in once I get home.”
“Oh… do you live far away?”
“Just a couple blocks over.”
“I see.”
“You?”
“Same…”
You hummed and nodded, and the two of you stayed silent for a few moments, until Chris started speaking again.
“So… do you like your job?”
“What?” You chuckled. “That was so random.”
“I’m trying to make conversation!” He retorted.
“I can’t say I dislike it, but I also can’t say I like it. It’s just a means to a way, I guess.”
“Mhm.”
“What about you, Chris? Do you like your job?”
“Yeah, a whole lot.” He smiled, and although you couldn’t see it, you heard it from the tone of his voice.
“Isn’t it stressful, though?”
“It is, but it’s also very rewarding. I wouldn’t pick anything else for the world.” He continued with the same excitement.
“That’s incredible. I wish my job and I had the same relationship honestly.”
“Hey, does your offer still stand?”
“Sorry?” You asked confused, and then realised what he was referring to. “Oh, yeah, of course. Come here.”
You found his shoulder in the dark and raised your hand until you found his nape, guiding his head towards your lap.
“There you go, are you comfortable?”
“Yeah, I am. Sorry about this, I’m just very tired and feel like I might pass out.”
“Don’t worry.”
You placed your other hand on his head and figured out he had a cap on, which you haven’t noticed earlier when you could see him.
“Mind if I take this off?”
“Why?” He asked immediately.
“Just figured I’d massage your scalp to help you sleep better?”
“Oh, no. I haven’t washed my hair.”
“So what?” You chuckled. “You’re such a kid.”
“I’m not a kid! Okay, fine, whatever. Take it off.”
“Good. Now, don’t get worked up and focus on sleeping.” You chuckled again and took off his cap, starting to scratch his head softly, and not even a few minutes later, you heard his steady breathing, signalling that he must’ve fallen asleep.
You wondered how long this power outage was going to last, and time seemed to pass by extremely slowly, and you eventually ended up dozing off as well. The next thing you remember is waking up blinded by the strong white lights inside the elevator, with Chris still sleeping peacefully in your lap.
“Hey.” You nudged him awake, and as he sat up, he looked more confused than ever.
“What’s up? Is the power back on?”
“Apparently.” You smiled softly, yawning.
“Thank you for being my pillow.” He said and stood up, putting his cap back on, then gave you a hand to help you up as well.
“No issues.” You chuckled and accepted his help.
“Need me to drop you off?”
“No, don’t worry about me. I live really close by. Besides, I still need to go back upstairs and grab my phone, so you get going and get some more rest.”
“Alright. Good night, Eun-ji.”
“Night!” You waved as he exited the elevator, unable to believe the interaction you just had, but still way too tired to think too much about it.
---
“That was one of the best sleeps I’ve ever had, believe it or not.”Chris says with a laugh as he recalls the memory.
“Yeah, you mentioned about it a whole lot and always made me scratch your head before sleep whenever you’d come over.” You laughed as well with a shake of your head and watched as he grabbed another card from the deck.
“When was our first kiss?” He asks, and you tilt your head to the side.
“You mean, the date and time?”
“I think it’s more like… if you remember how it happened?” He replies, quite confused as well.
“Ah, I see. Of course I remember.”
“During our first date?”
“No.” You chuckled again. “I told you before that you don’t remember that one time!”
“Ohhhh!” He exclaims. “Yeah, sorry, I think I was drunk out of my mind when that kiss happened.”
“You make it sound like I took advantage of a poor drunk man.” You joke, and Chris laughs as well.
“No, no, nothing like that. But come on, tell the story.”
“Fine.” You playfully roll your eyes.
---
“I can’t believe we’ve been invited to this party!” Your co-worker exclaimed happily as she applied and reapplied her lipstick, making you laugh at her antics.
“Why? It’s literally just a Christmas dinner, babe.”
“No, Eun-ji. It’s not just a dinner, everyone will be there. Everyone.”
“No clue what this means, but whatever.” You chuckled again.
“It means, even the idols! I told you I met Yeji last week and she was such a sweetheart! I wonder if she remembers me!”
“I doubt it, with how much foundation you’ve put on, babe.”
“What, am I not beautiful?” She pouted.
“You are extremely beautiful, but you look very different compared to your day-to-day look. Wait, your lipstick smudged a bit. Here, let me wipe it off.” You grabbed a napkin and carefully worked around your coworker’s lips, making sure the lipstick looked cleanly applied.
“Thank you so much! You’re dressed so plainly, though. You should always dress to impress, Eun-ji! Let’s get you in a dress!” She exclaimed, but you were quick to shake your head.
“No, thank you. I’d much rather feel comfortable. Besides, it’s just a dumb dinner. It’s not like I’ll meet the love of my life or anything like that. I don’t care to impress anyone either.”
“You’re literally impossible. Fine, wear your lame-ass black shirt and jeans, then!” She stuck her tongue out, and you replied in the same manner, before you two ended up making your way towards the elevators.
A few floors up, the elevator stopped, and the doors opened, revealing two men.
One of them, you knew.
“Oh, hello! Eun-ji, right?” Chris spoke, and you smiled slightly.
“Hi.”
“Are you girls going to the last floor too?” He asked, noticing the striking discrepancy between how you and your co-worker were dressed.
“Yeah, we are.” You replied, trying to ignore how hard your co-worker was gripping your arm. You were sure she was freaking out and in dire need of help, since she couldn’t seem to keep her cool in front of these two.
“This is Felix, by the way.” Chris introduced him.
“Hello!” The other man replied in a low tone with a nod and a sweet smile, and you acknowledged him with a short nod.
Of course, you also knew who Felix was, but it was never a big deal to you that they were famous or whatever. They were still people, just like you and your co-worker, who didn’t seem to think the same way, however.
The elevator ride was short, and you got to the last floor in no time, waving goodbye to Felix and Chris and heading towards your assigned table.
“You didn’t tell me you knew freaking Bang Chan!” Your co-worker scream-whispered in your ear, still gripping your arm.
“Because I don’t.” You retorted with a shrug.
“Yeah, you do! He even knew your name! How did that happen?”
“We just happened to meet in an elevator and got stuck for about two hours or so.” You shrugged again.
“What? When?”
“A few months ago, maybe?”
“How could you not tell me? I thought we were friends!”
“Because there was nothing to say!” You replied slightly annoyed, and she rolled her eyes, just as you reached the table.
~
The air was so stuffy in the large room, you could barely breathe. There were too many people – most likely almost everyone in the company, be it idols or mere workers.
It was so hard to hear your thoughts over the loud music, that you decided to simply make a run for it and disappear. It was getting late anyway, and you were tired, and quite honestly sick of the noise.
As you got back to the elevator and reached over to press the button and call it to your floor, your hand collided with someone else’s.
“It appears we meet again.” Chris chuckled.
“Yeah, what’s with us and this damn elevator? I don’t get it.” You laughed as well as you both stepped inside, and you pressed on the ground floor.
Chris also reached out to the buttons and pressed on another floor, but you didn’t pay it any mind.
The doors opened and he got out with a little smile and a “Goodbye!”, but then, just before the doors closed again, he placed his hand in-between them, making them reopen.
“Yes?” You asked in surprise.
“Do you, uhm… do you wanna come see my studio?”
“Why?”
“Might be cool to see.” He shrugged. “I have a bomb song idea and, you know, the creative process and all is quite interesting.”
“The creative process.” You chuckled. “Alright. Why not? As long as it’s quiet.”
“It is, it’s the best room in the building, trust me.” He smiled excitedly and turned around, so you followed him out of the elevator and into the studio.
“It’s so cramped!” You exclaimed the moment you saw it.
“Yeah, but it’s cosy, and it’s mine.” He smiled and offered you a seat on his sofa, which you were quick to accept.
Chris initially sat down at the desk, but after a little while of him pressing buttons and you admiring every corner of the room in silence, he decided to stand back up and come sit on the sofa next to you.
“No more working?”
“No more working.” He shook his head. “I can’t focus.”
“Oh, is it because I’m here?” You replied, slightly embarrassed. Maybe you shouldn’t have come.
“No, of course not! It’s because I’m drunk as fuck and nothing on my screen makes any sense.” He replied quickly with a warm laugh.
“Oh. It’d be best to head home and sleep, then.”
“Eun-ji, I’ll be blunt. Your lips look so incredible right now…”
“Wh- what? My lips?” You immediately put your fingers on top of them. “Must be this new lipbalm I’m using. It’s called-”
“No, it’s not that.” Chris chuckled. “I just wanna…” He grabbed your hand softly and dragged it away, his body coming closer to you, until your lips collided.
For a few seconds, you were taken aback by what was happening, but as the kiss deepened, your hands found the back of his head and you brought him closer.
His tongue was hot on yours, and in no time, you found yourself sitting in his lap, still making out like you were thirsty and his mouth had the only water left on Earth.
One of his hands travelled under your shirt on your naked back, and the other went down to your bum, squeezing it softly, and you let out a moan muffled by his mouth on yours.
---
“Yeah, thinking about it, it was you who initiated that kiss, so you can’t blame me for your drunken mistakes.” You chuckle.
“That was anything but a mistake, Eun-ji.” He replies with a smile that you couldn’t quite read, however, there is a slight longing in his eyes, which makes your heart skip a beat. “And it was quite funny, really. I literally couldn’t remember that we made out, but the next thing I know, I’m looking at my phone and see that we have a date planned in the next few days.”
You chuckle again at the memory, remembering how confused he was when you messaged him to confirm the details about the date.
“Alright, it’s my turn.” You say, deciding to stop pondering on your first moments as a couple and ignore his expression, as you aren’t sure you’d be able to keep a straight face for much longer if he keeps looking at you that way.
He looks at you as if he’s still in love, which makes no sense to you whatsoever. It’s been a year, and even though you are probably still very much in love with him, he is, after all, the one that got away.
You draw a card and read out loud.
“What’s your most treasured memory with us?”
“Oh, tough one.” He replies quickly, his brows furrowing.
“Why? You can’t think of any of them?” You ask, slightly dejected.
“No, it’s not that, Eun-ji. It’s just that… I treasure all of our memories.”
“All of them?” You counter back.
“Yes.”
“Even the fights?”
“Even those.”
As he replies, you don’t know what to say any further. You want to ask some more about it, but before you get the chance to formulate a proper question in your head, he begins talking again.
“If I were to pick only one, however… I think I’d go with that one time you surprised me by coming to our concert in Europe.”
---
“Thank you! You were great tonight, and we can’t wait to come again!” Chris shouted in his microphone before heading off-stage, completely sweaty but still high on the adrenaline from being on stage in front of such a large crowd.
No matter how many times he’s done it, he could never get used to it.
“Good job, boys.” He complimented his team members with a large smile plastered on his face. “Are you ready to party for the rest of the night?”
“Oh, Chris. The manager just informed me that you have to go back to the hotel. There’s apparently something wrong with your room.” Felix frowned slightly as he approached Chris, but was unable to contain his excitement for long, so he made sure to turn around just in time for him not to notice the large smile on his face.
“An issue with my room…?” Chris contemplated with a shake of his head but decided to take the driver anyway and go back to the hotel.
After all, he could always meet up with the boys and the staff later and party, after he fixed whatever was wrong with the room and saw what the emergency was about.
He inquired about the issue at the reception, but they only informed him to head upstairs, and so, he followed suit and went to his room.
As he opened it, however, he noticed that there wasn’t anything wrong. In fact, it was the exact opposite.
There you were, in his room, sitting leisurely on the bed and smiling gleefully at him.
“You’re finally back!” You exclaimed getting off the bed, and Chris just stood silent in the doorway, as if unable to believe his eyes.
“Eun-ji?!” He asked, confusion plastered across his face. “But… how? You told me you couldn’t get off work!”
“Yeah, well, surprise! My co-worker finally agreed to switch shifts with me, so I’ll be here until you leave to the next city!”
“That’s, oh my God, I’m freaking out!” He exclaimed, immediately running towards you and hugging you tightly against his chest, peppering your face with kisses.
“Eww, you’re so sweaty!” You joked and pushed him away.
“Let’s take a shower together! How does that sound?”
“Don’t be lame, Chris. I already filled the tub, let’s have a bubble bath instead!”
“Damn, you’re the freaking best.”
“Damn right.”
You two made your way towards the bathroom, slowly undressing each other in-between kisses, and when you were completely naked, you went into the tub and washed Chan’s back, kissing his neck slowly and hugging him from behind.
“By the way, Chris, you were amazing on stage.”
“Don’t tell me you’ve also seen the concert!” He exclaimed surprised.
“Of course I did! Well, some of it, anyway. But you know what? I’m quite pissed at you. I should be the only one who gets to see these.” As you replied, you moved your hand lower until it reached his abs.
“You’re the only one who gets to touch them, baby.”
“That’s not even true. Your make-up staff touches them all the time.” You pouted, and Chris started laughing at your antics.
Although he couldn’t see you, as you were still hugging him from behind, he knew you well enough to know the face you were making.
“I missed you.” You whispered.
“Me too, baby.” He replied and turned around, making sure to splash a ton of water on the floor in the process, and kissed you again. “Wanna get out so I can show you how much I’ve missed you?”
“Hell yeah.”
---
“That’s a good memory, yeah.” You chuckle, your cheeks growing slightly red remembering the steaming night you two shared, and the morning sex afterwards.
You couldn’t deny that Chris was the best you’ve ever had in every way, and your body already got hot at the thought of him touching you like that.
“So, I guess that makes it my turn.” Chris says with a clear of his throat, and you wonder if he is thinking about the same things as you.
“Go ahead.” You smile and point him towards the cards on his deck.
“Have you slept with anyone else since we’ve broken up?” Chris reads out loud, but before taking his eyes away from the card, he continues by saying: “Wait, you don’t have to respond to this. Can we skip this question?”
He looks at the staff members and places the card down, but you don’t have anything to hide. It wouldn’t have mattered anyway if you slept or didn’t sleep with anyone else. It’s not like it’s any of his business to care and get affected by your reply.
“I didn’t.” You say quietly and reach towards a new card but decide to ask as well. “Have you?”
“Eun-ji…” He frowns.
“Sorry for asking.” You shrug and then turn your card up. “The next questions reads-”
“I haven’t.” He cuts you off and averts his gaze, moment when you look at him confused.
“What?”
“I haven’t… slept with anyone else.” Chris confesses, leaving you utterly speechless.
“Oh. Alright… uhm… the next question says… what was the worst part about our relationship?” You tuck your hair behind your ear, a habit you have whenever you get nervous.
“Oh, that’s an easy one.” He chuckles. “It was definitely me.”
“What?” You frown. “Chris, you know that’s not true.”
“But it is… the fact that I was never there when you needed me…”
---
“So, I went shopping today. What are you wearing on Saturday? If you wear a tie, we need to get one in the same colour as my dress.” You spoke in a breath, kissing Chan's cheek.
“Saturday? What’s on Saturday?” He asked, genuinely confused.
“What?” You chuckled in disbelief. “My childhood friend invited us to her wedding, remember?”
“Oh, right!” He exclaimed. “Wait, let me check the date real quick.”
He stood up from the bed and ran to the living room, picking up his phone and opening his calendar.
“Shit. Babe…?” He smiled sheepishly.
“Don’t tell me you have other plans.” You frowned.
“I talked to our producer, and we are supposed to record some parts from that new song I told you about on Saturday… but it’s okay! I’ll make sure to finish in time so we can still go to the wedding! Don’t worry!” He immediately responded and apologised.
“Chris, the wedding is 3 hours away by car. I promised her we’d be there at 2 for the ceremony as well, not just for the party afterwards.” Your frown only deepened.
“Do we really need to go to the ceremony, though? Aren’t they… I don’t know… boring?”
“Are you being serious right now?” You sat up, annoyance plastered in your tone. “Chris, she’s my best friend. Of course we have to go to the ceremony too!”
“Eun-ji…” He started, and you got even more annoyed. It was like he wouldn’t take accountability for anything.
“I told you six months ago, Chris. How much time ahead do I have to tell you to make sure you’d clear up your schedule?”
“I’m so sorry, baby, but you know that our release schedule is really tight…”
“Why can’t I be a priority at least once, hm?! At least for a weekend!” You felt your eyes watering up. You knew his job was the most important, however, you were getting tired of always being put in second place by your boyfriend.
Hell, you were so disappointed right now. You asked him to clear up one single weekend, and he couldn’t even remember to do that.
“You know what? You’re right. I’m going to call up the producer right now and reschedule for next week, okay?” He pleaded with you, but you were already beyond disappointed with this situation.
He’s already made sure not to prioritize you, so you decided to just stop bothering him about it altogether.
“You know what? Don’t worry about it. I’ll just go on my own.”
“Eun-ji-”
“Besides, you don’t know anyone there, anyway, whereas I’ll just catch up with all my friends from school, so don’t worry. Go record your song.”
You got out of bed and made your way to the bathroom, turning on the water and hopping into the shower, trying to wash all the tears away.
---
“That was certainly… one of the lowest points in our relationship.” You reply, remembering the event with bitterness.
You ended up going alone to the wedding, and despite having fun and catching up with your old friends, having to go there on your own and having people ask you about where your boyfriend was truly hurt you.
“Mhm… I agree. I was such a dick. I’m so sorry, Eun-ji. If I were to turn back time, I would’ve never done those stupid mistakes.” He smiles apologetically.
“It’s fine… it’s all in the past anyway.” You return the same pained expression as he draws another card from the pile.
“Why did you accept to come here today?”
“Is that the question?”
“Yeah.”
“Hmm, I guess I was just… I don’t know, even though we’ve broken up on relatively good terms, if you could say that... I guess I just wanted to talk to you again?” You smile briefly and draw another card. “Do you think I was a jealous partner?”
“You?” Chris chuckles. “God, no. If anything, I was the jealous one.”
“You were?” You laugh as well.
“Yeah… You, however, were never jealous, no matter how many people I’d interact with. Even though it was never inappropriate, I really appreciated that you trusted me, no matter what.”
“Of course I trusted you.” You smile. “You never made me doubt you, not even once.”
Which was true. You knew that he truly loved you during the brief two years of your relationship, and he’s never put himself in any compromising position with anyone else to make you jealous.
“Anyway… the next card reads: Why didn’t we work out?” You read out loud and wait a few seconds for Chris’ reply.
“I think the first time I started to doubt if our relationship was fair to you was when you got fired from the company because… because you were dating me. That’s when I knew that something was fundamentally wrong with us being together, because instead of me giving you anything positive, I just ended up causing you pain.” Chris speaks slowly, letting out a long exhale at the end.
“It was… a really tough time for me. Although my job was not ideal, it was something I worked very hard for, and once our relationship became public and suddenly everyone knew about us…” You shake your head.
It was a very difficult time for you to put yourself out there and find another job when the whole country was aware of your relationship with Chris.
“However… no matter how hard it was, I could get through it only because you were there with me.” You frowned. “I never blamed you for my job, or anything like that… ever.”
“I know… But still, how could I not blame myself? I felt so guilty… Heck, even now, a year after we broke up, I’m still sending you money to help you out with rent, even though I know you have a new job and all.” He chuckles.
“And I always send it back.” You smile.
“Wait, you do?” He frowns. “Really?”
“Mhm.” You nod, and he pulls out his phone and opens his bank app, and his expression only becomes more downcast.
“Eun-ji, why?”
“It’s alright, Chris. I really don’t need it. You’d better spend it for something else.”
“But I-”
“Really, stop it. Read the next card.” You blow him off, dismissing his words, and he lets out a sigh.
“What was our worst fight?”
“Hmm… I think the most soul crushing one was when I got that new job…”
“Right, I was also thinking of that one. See? I told you I was the more jealous one in our relationship.” Chris chuckles with a shake of his head.
---
“Thank you for dropping me off.” You smiled sweetly at one of your new co-workers, who offered you a ride home in his car since you were on his way.
Ever since you got fired from JYPE, you were struggling to find a new job, but thankfully, an opportunity came your way, and you didn’t think twice to accept it.
However, the new job was quite far away, and the hours were longer. You missed your short commute home, but you were simply unable to find anything else in the area.
You got out of his car and waved him goodbye, and when you turned around, there was Chris, with an angry expression on his face.
“Who was that?” He asked immediately.
“Is this how we say hi to each other now?” You tilted your head, unable to understand why he seemed so pissed at you.
“Eun-ji, answer the question, please. Who the hell was that, and why is he dropping you off so late? Where were you?”
“At work. I started a new job, remember?” You frowned, not understand what he was trying to accuse you of, or why.
“It’s almost 9 PM, and I see a random man dropping you off home. Do you think I’m stupid or something?” He fired back, angrier than before.
“Excuse me? What are you insinuating?” You retorted.
“I’m not insinuating anything. I’m just asking you a damn question, Eun-ji.”
“And I’m answering!” You almost started shouting but decided to take a deep breath in and ask Chris to talk inside.
He followed you upstairs, but his demeanour was cold, which gave away the fact that the fight was far from over.
“Alright, we’re inside. Care to explain now?”
“There’s nothing to explain, Chris. That was just my co-worker.”
“Just your co-worker. Okay, sure. And why the hell was he giving you a ride home?” He continued to ask in an accusatory tone, which pissed you off to no end.
“I don’t know, Chris. Maybe it’s because my boyfriend is way too busy to make the time to come pick me up or at least send me a damn cab!”
You found it hard to keep your composure any longer, so the way you replied came out a bit too loud, and so began a screaming match between you two, and by far the worst fight you’ve ever had, which ended in Chris leaving your apartment and you crying your eyes out until 5AM.
---
“I am not proud at all of how I acted that night…” Chris closes his eyes and breaths in, and you can almost hear the pain in his voice.
“I can’t say I handled it too well either.” You sigh. “I mean, I always gave you my unconditional trust, and there you were, doubting me because I decided to accept a ride from my co-worker. It was really shitty of you to do that…”
“I know… I’m sorry.” He apologises, and you draw a new card.
“Who broke up with who?”
“It was me... I knew how much I was hurting you, and I just… I guess I decided that breaking up would be better for the both of us.”
---
“Are you mad at me again?” You frowned, hearing the 10th sigh getting out of Chan’s lips in the past 5 minutes.
“No, I’m not mad at you.”
“That’s what it looks like.”
“I’m just so incredibly stressed, Eun-ji. Can’t you understand that?”
“No, Chris, I’m just a child, I need you to spell it out for me.”
“Now you’re just mocking me again.”
“What the hell is wrong with you? It’s like the only thing we do lately is fight.”
“You’re right.” He let out another sigh. “I wish we wouldn’t fight anymore.”
He stood up and cupped your cheeks, pressing a firm kiss against your lips.
“Me neither. I love you, Chris. I really do.”
“I love you too, Eun-ji.”
You continued kissing slowly, your hands exploring the other’s body, and your clothes started disappearing one by one, your naked bodies collapsing on the bed on top of one another.
You made love and kissed each other again and again, until there was no space on your bodies that the other’s lips haven’t touched.
Then, you laid your head on Chan’s shoulder and closed your eyes, almost falling asleep before the sounds of a whimper stirred you awake.
“Hey, you okay?” You asked, concern plastered across your face.
“Eun-ji… I’m so sorry baby.”
“What for?” You frowned.
“I think…” Chris started, his voice immediately cut off by a cry as he separated himself from you and sat up on the bed, not even looking at you.
“What’s wrong?” You sat up as well and placed your hand on his naked back, caressing it softly.
“I think we should break up, Eun-ji.”
As he said this, it felt like your whole world collapsed around you. His words took your breath away, and as he stood up and got dressed, you began shaking your head repeatedly and trying to talk some sense into him.
“Chris… no. No, no, we can’t. What do you mean, break up? No…” You stood up and followed him out of the room and into the hallway, watching helplessly as he began putting on his shoes.
“I’m so, so sorry. But it’d be better for us to break up. All we do is fight, and I… I ruined everything…” Chris cried, and so did you, as you hanged onto him for dear life, hugging his back and trying to stop him for going through that door.
“Please, no. Please stay.” You begged. “We don’t have to break up. We can make it work, hm?”
“No… No, we can’t. We’ve been trying for so long, and yet… I put you through so much… you’d definitely be better off without me, Eun-ji.”
“You’re so fucking selfish!” You shouted, crying your heart out. “I love you so much, and yet…”
“I’ve never loved anyone as much as I love you, Eun-ji. But…” As he said this, he chocked on a sob, coughing slightly and wiping his tears away rapidly. “I just think it’d be best to stop this before I end up hurting you more, hm?”
"I'm the one who should decide if you're hurting me, Chris, not you!" You countered back, but he wouldn't hear any of it.
He turned around and hugged you tight, and the only thing you could do was beg him not to go.
He didn’t listen to you, and he left, and the house felt unbearably cold, and your bed was so empty, you loathed looking at it, knowing that just hours prior, you’ve made love on top of those sheets, and he loved you, and you loved him.
You tried calling him numerous times for the next week, but his calls would instantly get redirected to voice mail. At first, you left messaged for him, raging from disappointed, to sad, and even angry as the days passed and he wouldn’t return any of your calls, and after two weeks of no news from him, you understood that his decision was final, so you decided to finally block his number, and you haven’t looked back since.
---
“You were so incredibly cruel about that.” You reply, feeling tears well up in your eyes. However, you swallowed back the lump in your throat and didn’t allow yourself to cry in front of him again.
“I don’t know what I was thinking… To be honest, I’ve been considering breaking up for a while, but… the way I did it was indeed way too cruel, and that’s something I still regret. I just ended up hurting both of us in the process…”
You let out a bitter smile at his confession. You wanted to tell him how much it still hurt, how the break-up was still fresh in your mind even a year later, and how much you wish it never happened, but you couldn’t say anything.
You point him towards the cards, and he draws one and reads:
“Who do you think had the harder time after we broke up?”
“Honestly?” You chuckle. “I’ll selfishly say it was me. Did you have a hard time at all?”
“God, you have no idea.” He chuckles as well.
“Really?” Your eyes grow large. “But you didn’t even return my calls.”
“And when I did, I found out you blocked my number, so…” He scratches his nape.
“Oh.”
“Yeah…”
You don’t know how to react to this new information. You’ve been wondering all this time if he’s ever reached out, and now that you found he did, you heart broke.
Maybe coming to this show was really a mistake, because your heart doesn’t seem to heal at all – it’s quite the opposite. It’s weighing heavier in your chest, and it hurts so much, and it doesn't seem like you'll get any closure.
You draw another card, but the question gets cold on your tongue, and you barely find the strength to ask it.
“Did you… uhm… did you ever see yourself marrying me?” You clear your throat and look at Chris, who’s showing you the most compassionate expression, so full of love, like you haven’t broken up a year ago.
“Yes.” He replies plainly, and this finally breaks you.
You avert your gaze as you feel your eyes swelling up with tears.
“I’m sorry, can I please have a moment? I need a break.”
You take in a few deep breaths and refuse to look at Chris anymore, because you can’t help the growing feelings in your chest and the pain ever-present in your heart.
“Alright… when?” You ask after a little while, trying to wipe away any tears that might’ve fallen on your cheeks.
“I fell in love with you quickly, but… I think I knew for sure that I wanted us to… uhm… to be more than just a couple… when you first met my family.”
---
“I’m so anxious! What if they won’t like me? What if they’d think I’m not good enough for you? Oh my God, Chris, where are the presents I bought??? Did you forget to pack them? I explicitly said-”
“God, Eun-ji, calm down.” Chris chuckled. “It’s just my parents. And I put the presents right there in the bag, just as you’ve asked me to.”
“I’m so anxious, I can’t help it!” You pouted. “Where exactly?”
“Here, let me look for them.” He offered, and you plopped on the bed in Chan’s old room, almost on the verge of crying.
You were thankful that his parents were away for a few hours to some sort of event, which gave you a little time to settle in their house and mentally prepare yourself for the impending meeting.
“What?” Chris asked puzzled.
“What?” You immediately sat back up, watching as Chris looked confused.
“I’m sure I packed them. Is this the wrong bag?” He tilted his head to the right, and you just about died.
“This can’t be true!” You exclaimed as Chris closed the bag and examined it.
“Shit, I thought you said I should put them in the blue one.”
“Chris!” You grabbed a pillow and threw it at him, and he started chuckling.
“It’ll be okay, babe, don’t worry.”
“No, it won’t! I came empty handed and they’re going to hate me, and-” You sniffed and buried your face in your palms, but Chris grabbed them gently and pushed them away, grabbing your face with his hands.
“They won’t hate you. They will see how much I love you, and they will love you too.”
“I put so much thought into those presents, though.” You pouted, thinking of the matching jewellery set you got for Chan’s folks that took you ages to decide on.
Before Chris got the chance to say anything else, you heard the front door open, and your heart stood still in your chest.
“Looks like they’re here. Come on, let’s meet them.” He dragged you up from the bed and you reluctantly followed him, and there they were, in the doorway, with large smiles on their faces at the sight of their son.
Chris introduced you and they immediately made you feel welcomed by taking you into a large hug, and then you had lunch together, when you talked and told them lots of funny stories from work and from your childhood.
Chan’s mother was more than happy to hear these stories and shared some of her son’s growing up as well, with a large smile spread across her face, and you had such a pleasant time together, hours ended up passing by, and day turned to night in no time.
By the time you were back in bed next to Chris, you wondered why you worried in the first place. These people were as lovely as him, and they apparently adored you too.
---
“My mom still asks me about you.” Chris chuckles.
“I also think about them often. How are they doing?” You ask with a soft smile, remembering the good times.
There were a lot of downs in your relationship, but more than anything – bigger than the pointless fights and sleepless nights –, you had some amazing moments together that you’d do anything to relive.
It truly doesn’t feel like a whole year went by with Chris not being in your life.
“They are doing well. Like usual.” He smiles back. “I believe we have two more questions to ask.”
“Yeah, it appears so.” You reply, unable to believe that a whole hour has passed already.
“My question reads: what have you been up to ever since we’ve broken up?”
“Hmm… you know me, just hustling here and there. I’ve found a new job that’s closer to home, I started going to the gym more or less regularly, I made some new friends and tried out some hobbies – which I ended up being too bad at to pursue.” You chuckle.
“Really? Like what?” Chan’s eyes sparkle with excitement as he’s placing his elbows on the table and his head steadily on his palms, showing you that you have his undivided attention, and it feels like no time has passed at all.
If you weren’t totally sure of your feelings until now, if you had the smallest doubt in your mind that you still loved him, watching him look at you like this made it clear.
You are very much still in love with Chris, and despite everything that went down, you wish things would be different between you.
You dread the hour being over and going back home to your life, devoid of his presence.
“Uhm, don’t laugh at me please.” You start, and Chris already lets out a chuckle. “I tried dancing, painting, boxing-”
“Wait, dancing?” Chris immediately erupts into laughter. “Eun-ji, you can’t be serious!”
“And why not?” You frown jokingly.
“I mean, you were always so bad at it whenever I’d try to show you any moves!” He continues laughing.
“Well, that’s your own fault for having hard ass choreos, not mine!” You retort, laughing along. “Besides, you promised me you wouldn’t laugh!”
“I didn’t promise anything!” He raises his hands in front of him in fake defence, a large smile adorning his face.
“Oh, fuck off!” You exclaim with a chuckle, drawing the last card from your pile. “Why did you invite me here today?”
“Oh.” Chris immediately turns serious and scratches his nape in slight embarrassment. “Uhm, you might know that I have a new album coming out… a solo one?”
“Yeah, I’ve heard something about it.” You nod.
So, after all, you were right, and he only invited you here to promote it.
“I don’t know what that has to do with me, though.” You continue, feeling your heart grow heavy.
“The album is about you, that’s why.” He smiles softly. “Would you maybe like to… listen to one of the songs in it?”
“Sure.” You nod again, your heart beating harder.
“It’s called Eun-ji.”
As he says this, he pulls out his phone and presses play on the song, and the calm beats begin surrounding you two, and soon enough, Chan’s pained voice.
It’s a sad song about a missed love, about regret and pain, about every unspoken feeling Chris had ever since you’ve broken up, and you found yourself tearing up and needing a few napkins to go through the whole thing.
Chris also begins crying, wiping his tears away repeatedly until the song is over, and when it is, he clears his throat and places his phone back in his pocket.
“Eun-ji, I… I’m still in love with you. Do you think that maybe... you would ever see us getting back together? Do you think you could ever give me another chance to fix my mistakes, to fix us?”
As he confesses this, you cry even louder and decide against replying. Instead, you stand up and go directly towards him, plopping yourself in his lap and hugging him tightly, and he immediately welcomes you, his arms circling your frame and pulling you tighter against him.
“I love you too, so, so much, Chris.” You whisper as you draw back, and his hands find your cheeks as he wipes away all the tears that are falling.
“My love, I was so, so wrong and selfish.” He frowns.
You shake your head, not wanting to think about it anymore, and press your lips against his.
Your first kiss after a whole year apart is long and sweet, and he hugs you even closer, and oh, how much you’ve missed him and everything about him. How much you longed to have him again…
“I missed you so much.” You confess, and he buries his head against your chest and sobs quietly in your arms for a few moments.
“Do you… uhm… do you want to get out of here and have some lunch? And maybe dinner, too?” He asks looking right in your eyes, and you nod, so he helps you up and grabs your hand, and without a word more, you two exit the studio together with the silent understanding that you’re back together, willing to work on your mistakes and to make it work this time around.
~The End~
#stray kids#stray kids fanfictions#stray kids scenarios#stray kids angst#stray kids imagines#stray kids x reader#stray kids x y/n#stray kids x you#bang chan x reader#bang chan x you#bang chan x y/n#bang chan angst#lovers to strangers#hurt/comfort#skz#stray kids masterlist#stuck in elevator#first meet#bang chan fluff#bang chan imagines#strangers to lovers#stray kids fanfiction#bang chan fanfiction#bang chan fanfic#bang chan oneshot#stray kids oneshot
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random hermitcraft/ life series headcanons cause my brains rotting over both ;^)
OVERALL:
- after each life series all the members come back to hermitcraft and throw some form of a house party
-no one rlly dies on hermitcraft, they just tend to gets lots of injurys(broken bones, sprains, concussions, all the fun stuff)
- they definitely have an infirmary there somewhere
-each smps like a city, for example hermitcraft and empires smp r neighboring cities
INDIVIDUAL:
- Joel, Grian, and Jimmy are all siblings cause i said so
-grians oldest, joels middle, jimmys youngest
i imagine a good majority of them played some sport/ activity before coming to hermitcraft so heres some cause idk y this has been plaguing me:
bdubs: volleyball, golf
cub: some form of student council maybe??
doc: golf, lacrosse (definetly js whacks ppl w his stick)
etho: ice hockey, lacrosse
false: field hockey, track
gem: field hockey, wrestling, lacrosse
hypno: hockey
iskall: wrestling
scar: student council w cub (convex ;))
grian: tennis
jevin: football, wrestling
impulse: football, shotput
joehills: yearbook/ newpaper club(idk i get the vibe)
keralis: soccer,gymnastics(i could see him js doing a roundoff backhandspring out of nowhere dw abt it)
mumbo: golf, photography club
pearl: swimming, cross country
rendog: THE theatre kid
skizz: football, basketball, baseball
smallishbeans: soccer, volleyball, baseball
stress: cheerleading, wrestling, volleyball
tango: baseball
beef: lacrosse, football
wels: volleyball, golf
xb: swimming
xisuma: golf
zed: some form of a science club,
cleo: field hockey, softball
bigb: swimming(idk i get the vibe)
inthelittlewood: theatre kid, soccer
lizzie: field hockey, cheer, lacrosse
smajor: cheer, golf
solidarity: soccer, tennis
these could go for a highschool au or anything but i imagine they did these in highschool and then move to “hermitcraft city” or smth and they still like practice all these andn stuff
monthy hangouts are set up by the magic mountain group, usually consisting of movies and games(always sleepovers at someones base)
cleo is the best cook on the server,she host bi-annual seever wide dinners (w the help of beef and false for cooking)
bdubs and joel draw out there bases together, only time youll see them not beefin w eachother
the redstoners r covered in burn marks due to redstone lighting at wrong times or js blowimg up
cub and xisumas are the servers doctors, running the infirmary if needed
if a hermit gets a cast, crutches, a boot, splint, etc, gem, bdubs, keralis, skizz, and stress make it a goal to decorate it as much as possible(they have a competition to see who can get it done first)
after parties, xisuma, impulse, hypno, and false are usually the ones to make sure everyone gets home, being “designated walkers”(they dont drink so they can walk everyone home)(no idk where im coming up w this stuff either)
team zits definitely have movie marathons weekly(they play uno to decide who picks the series)
mumbo and grian love watching dance moms(holly is mumbos fave, kelly is grians fave)
doc, etho, beef, and gem play eachother in lacrosse all the time, getting way to agressive each time (always some form of an injury outcome)
jevin is a weirdly good baker, makes the best cakes(taste and decoration)
pearl is rlly good at anything art related (loves painting/ drawing other hermits doing whatever)
ren makes the server put on plays (hes director and the main character in every one)(hes hires whatever hermits he can get to also act in them)
75% of the times tango sneezes, something catches on fire (theres fire extinguishers everywhere imaginable)
xb is the fastest swimmer on the server by a landslide, every hermit has tried to best him but he always wins by atleast 2 seconds
zed collects little trinkets, and leaves them in peoples bases as gifts
#life series#headcanon#smallishbeans#ethoslab#bdoubleo100#bigbstatz#cubfan135#docm77#falsesymmetry#geminitay#iskall85#goodtimeswithscar#grian#impulsesv#joe hills#keralis#mumbo jumbo#pearlescentmoon#rendog#skizzleman#stressmonster101#tangotek#vintagebeef#xbcrafted#xisumavoid#zedaph#ldshadowlady#jimmy solidarity#smajor1995#hermitcraft
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We were seriously cheated from a great character arc with JJ and Jarah's baby.
Imagine JJ "you don't want me around your kid" Maybank meeting little Jarah junior. This guy is convinced that having kids is not in his future because he'll just mess them up, and he doesn't want to do to any kid what Luke did to him. He never even considers being a father because he just knows on a deep, intrinsic level that he's not someone to be trusted around kids. When John B and Sarah's baby is born he tries to find every excuse to be away from the house as much as possible until John B finally forces him to spend some time with the baby.
At first he's super hesitant because he doesn't want to do something that will somehow affect that kid later on and he "doesn't know how to interact with kids," but literally everyone else can see how good he is with the baby. There's some challenges naturally and he still doesn't trust himself around the baby very much but one day he ends up being the only Pouge available to babysit. He freaks out about being left alone with little Jarah junior, but the longer he spends with the kid the more he realizes that there is no way he would ever be able to hurt them. Like, he can't even rationalize how anyone can look at a baby and think about doing any of what Luke did to him.
So after that moment he begins to trust himself more around the kid. He'd be the fun uncle who sometimes introduced questionable activities, but he'd also gain some (much needed, long awaited) responsibility. And you better believe he would be the most protective of that kid. Rivaling John B? Probably.
I can just imagine him realizing that he can choose to treat this kid the complete opposite of how Luke treated him, and taking every opportunity to do so. And eventually it hits him that despite how much Luke's abuse messed with him, it doesn't mean he has to let it control the rest of his life. Maybe he could be a dad after all and do his own kid justice, ya know?
Yup... it's safe to say that I can't get this story line out of my head and am 99% sure I will end up writing a fan fic on this exact premise at some point in the not too distant future.
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upon finding lana cornered by one of his work colleagues at their last christmas party, a variety of emotions had come over sully and all revolved around how strikingly protective over her he had become. it had taken a lot of back and forth to get her to confess as to what was going on but once the nature of her previous job had been announced, those feelings of needing to defend her only grew more prevalent. it had been a shock to say the least, learning that not only had she slept with a man like that but she'd done so for money, he didn't know if it would be better for worse if for some strange reason she'd done it of her own accord. the details of her previous employment had been kept brief, namely because he didn't know how to address it delicately but also because he doubted his wife would be pleased with the notion of having a former sex worker looking after their kids. by that point, both sully and his kids were far too attached to let anything get in the way of making sure she stuck around, even if that meant keeping secrets and lying to his wife about why he'd made such a big deal about ending the party early that night. learning about her past had naturally brought about questions, for the next week or so he found it nearly impossible to go about his day without picturing her in all kinds of situations, both fetishizing her for that work and worrying about the possible things she had been made to endure as a result. he put himself in a difficult position of both needing to protect her from anything bad happening again and craving things from her that would have to come from her very exploitation. "oh, i think i'll leave it up to your imagination." he chuckled awkwardly and took a glance down to the hand that had settled on his shirt, in part because he felt it was wrong to be discussing his past rowdy behaviour, especially when he had worked so hard to leave it all in the dust and build himself into the man he was. although, he was also curious to what she thought him capable of. he'd engaged in the usual drunken debauchery expected of a man in his twenties, allowed himself to submit to each and every whim that came about no matter the cost, it had been a fun life but ultimately not maintainable. she was clearly very intoxicated, he didn't want to take anything she said or did too seriously or make her feel bad for acting out of sorts. the imagine of a bunch of young guys throwing themselves at lana didn't exactly fill him with joy but when delivered in that low, sultry tone, how could sully do any but do as she wished and pictured him there to save her? his arm tucked tight around her waist as he pulled her out from the dance floor, his hand wandering down the curve of her hips till his fingertips found the hem of her dress and helped pull it down to cover herself up, his days in clubs were far behind him but it was a nice thought nonetheless, one he banished immediately after he let it play out. he offered nothing but a small hum in response and before he could even think to answer her next questions, that nimble hand had made its way down his torso to the waistband of his pants. he didn't dare look down again, instead he kept his eyes on the road and swallowed back the surprised gasp that had threatened to come out. she'd always been a bold, confident girl but never to such an extreme, he chalked it up to the alcohol and god knows what else she might've ingested that night and quickly realised he had to be careful with how he dealt with her suggestive proposal. "you don't need to worry about me." carefully, he reached down and pried her hand away from his crotch, then brought it back over to her lap where he set it down with a gentle pat. "just relax, we'll be home soon." it didn't need to be a big deal. maybe she'd forget about it in the morning and they could both pretend it didn't happen, or perhaps she'd come to him apologising profusely and he would have the chance to comfort her once again. either way, sully knew he had to turn lana down before he was too weak to do so.
there were many factors at play when creating the taboo nature of lana and mr. landry's potential coupling— for one, there was the age difference. she'd thought it rude to ask specifically, but from what context clues she could pick up on, she'd guess he and his wife were around twice her age, but no matter the number, it was clear she and sully were in vastly different places in life with vastly different maturity levels. then, of course, there was the matter of him being her employer, and her landlord, and he was already married on top of that, which all combined gave him a great deal of power over her, and yet she couldn't help but feel like she was the one pulling the strings as she gazed at him from the passenger seat. as if she wasn't already worked up enough, there was just something about a man driving that really got her going, and she found herself becoming transfixed not by his face, or his broad chest just barely concealed by a flimsy t shirt, but by his hairy knuckles gripping the wheel. "i'm glad you came," she purred, lips slowly curling up into a lazy grin. no matter how hard she studied him, lana could never tell how exactly he felt about her. when she'd first taken the job, she figured she'd be dodging his advances left and right to try and form some basis of professionalism, but he'd been nothing but polite and respectful. at times he'd treat her with the detachment common for a boss, though as time went on and she became further integrated into the family, their dynamic shifted, lines blurring as he came to look out for her like one would a daughter. now that the incident at the party occurred— now that he knew what she used to do for a living— lana didn't know how exactly he saw her anymore, if it had planted some seed of sexual curiosity within his mind, or only made him that much more protective of her in a paternal sense. from what she picked up on, her attraction was far from one sided; it was merely a manner of helping him accept that he could act on his desires without jeopardizing his whole life. who knows? maybe she'd stumbled into that interview for a reason. perhaps some benevolent god had dropped her right onto his lap to help reinvigorate his lust for life, and he was just too boneheaded to accept it. "yeah?" her eyes were practically sparkling with intrigue, ink black lashes batting as she reached out to toy with the front of his shirt. "tell me about it..." her imagination was active, but she wanted something more concrete— had he merely engaged in the typical amount of debauchery for a man coming of age, or had he been particularly rowdy before marriage and fatherhood straightened him out? she'd liked to have seen him back then in his glory days, if for nothing else than to know for sure whether a mustache like that came pre or post twins. "i always do." as long as alcohol was involved, lana always had a good time, but going out now was almost bitter sweet when she remembered what she had back at home. "i should take you with me next time! maybe that'll stop random guys from grinding on me every five minutes." it was delivered in jest, though when spoken in her erotically inebriated tone of voice and when coupled with her sultry gaze which had drifted down to eye the crotch of his pajama pants, it may as well have been an invitation into her bed. "when's the last time you and mrs. landry went out, hm? you're always so busy... work, work, work..." the hand on his chest began traveling, working its way down to the waistband of his pants. "you work too hard taking care of everybody, mr. landry... who takes care of you?"
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I've been musing on Mhin's curse and their relationship with monstrosity again now that we have a silhouette for their full monster form from their standee backing, and the differences between the Halloween artwork posted on RSS's twitter and Bluesky account, respectively.
Their monstrous form promises grotesque body horror: it's emotionally and physically painful, and it looks like Mhin retains a vaguely human silhouette. Their monster form is bipedal, and has what appears to be an arm that might be where their wings split from. Their spine is twisted into a tail-like appendage, and they drip gore behind them as they move.
In the Halloween art, we have two versions of Mhin: one, which is the Mhin we know. And two, with glitchy effects added, another version of Mhin, with the whites of their eyes blackened. I'm willing to bet that this isn't Mhin, but instead some emergence of their monstrous side.
It''s been accepted that monstrosity is painful and abhorrent for Mhin. They despise monsters and monstrosity, repress it in any way they can, and they especially hate monsters who indulge in their own nature.
However, I have two questions as a result of this new art. Firstly, to what extent is their monster form a part of them? For example, is it their id made manifest, their worst impulses and desires unrestrained? Or is it akin to possession, where the monstrosity is imposed forcibly upon Mhin, some outside source implanted in them? Either way, I believe that this monstrosity is now a part of Mhin in a way they refuse to accept.
Secondly, I wonder if any small part of Mhin wants to indulge in monstrosity. Is part of the reason they're so focused on restraint and control and a cure precisely because there's something freeing about the destruction they enact? If Mhin sees themself in Vere and Ais, does a part of them feel jealous of the latter two's lack of restraint and hedonism? And, in turn, does this jealousy only reinforce their own self-hatred for considering, even for a moment, what it would be like to let go?
#liya.texts#touchstarved#mhin#im sooo excited for their monster form reveal you dont understand#there's also so many different paths rss could take with mhin's current issues#from what they've set up so far in the demo#and im actually so curious to see where mhin's character arc will go#but it's also fun imagining every possibility#anyways they wouldnt be so desperate and uptight#if a part of them hadnt considered what it would feel like to act like ais and vere lol#control issues mhin when their control slips: fuck. time to twist this situation in a way to further my hatred of myself and monstrosity
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modern au ft @crow-cap's oc sailor <3
the wood markings on xins face were inspired by @zah-likes-tea's art of them hehe
#its modern au(???) cuz its fun to imagine what theyd get up to if they had access to discord and minecraft#xin is the kind of minecraft player who fucks up the cobblestone generator every time <- speaking from experience#also sailors driving because it feels adjacent to sailing a boat and i wanted to be clever.. heh...#peep the lucky knot on the rearview window <3#the song xin is singing is homecoming serf by sidney gish partly because i imagine that as their singing voice#kind of soft and mellow not like a practised singer but still nice#also u dont understand im in love with the idea of xin having wooden markings on their skin UGHHHH SO COOOOLLL#zah that might possibly be the best thing ive ever seen THANK U#i tried to make it a small marking so it isnt too tedious to draw every time and its not a big deal if i forget it#myart#doodles#oc#friend oc#lmk oc#xin ya#sailor#little sailor
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some more telesphore :3
#the kingmaker histories#telesphore winterlich#my art#tel-only doodle dump partially cuz i love him dearly and he's fun to draw and i needed the practice drawing his handsome face ^^#and partially cuz depending on how you count it he's got like 5-7 fewer fanarts (on tumblr) than eisen/colette...#which is so so criminal eviltwisted and makes me so sad. so i took matters into my own hands :3#(though it'd be a fool's errand trying to keep the numbers even permanently LMAO. i also just wanted to draw a bunch of telsies)#(so i might probly fuck up the ratios later by doing this for eisen+colette lol...#i wanna get more consistent/comfortable drawing them all)#with this i have now posted (way) more telsie fanart than every other fanartist combined (excluding meg tuten's art ofc). yippee yippee#(it's not a competition) (but i am still keeping count) (i'm freak)#(but 'm not counting meg's cuz there's so much and i couldn't possibly find it all. plus i can't imagine how much is unposted)#(i just know there's Oodles and i love it all and that is enough for mee)#honestly this should've been hat practice as well but. i do not like drawing hats.#and i struggle with drawing the top of his head anyway so it's still useful practice lmao#if you asked me for my favorite character the answer would simultaneously be:#“i love all three of the protags so much!!! i couldn't possibly pick </3"#and “telesphore <3”#the margin? SO slim. i'm so very obsessed w/ all three of them#unimaginable fondness in my heart
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man everyone complains about snipers in splatoon and dont get me wrong, skilled snipers can, will, and do, wreck my shit, but everytime i see a sniper on the other team i do get a lil excited. enrichment in my enclosure. shiny thing to hunt and harass. sorry to all snipers i am targeting you specifically bc you are sooooo shiny and fun to harass. largely this is not an issue and i dont feel too bad about targeting snipers specifically bc I'm not good enough at the game for it to be some sort of unfairness. like i said. i frequently get my shit wrecked and never learn.
#toy txt post#splatoon#splatoon 3#splatoon 2#snipers out there ily. you ink like shit but youre so fun to hunt even when im bad at it. which is Often#i will always very fondly remember a series of matches i played in 2 where i had the undercover brella with ink armor and torpedo#and i think i had either haunt or thermal ink#and for some reason. Every Other Player Besides Me. was using chargers#i think it was just a couple at first but then ppl were like goofin?#and i was just. terrorizing them???????#and it was so fun#and i have to imagine it was fun for them too cos like#i mean they Outnumbered Me#and my team was also all snipers who werent leaving base#so i was just wildin#and at a certain point it was not possible to not hunt them bc. you know. i kept killing them#so. they Had to kill me#but like they Had to be having fun bc no one dropped out or changed weapons??? i was loving hunting snipers#and they seemed to be having fun trying to kill my desperate dumbass#back when i could Dodge Shit semi competently#i just want that again#that was back in 2. i think that contributed to skipper pavilion being one of my fav maps cos that was one of the ones in rotation#i thiiiink the other one was?#whats it called. it had the moving platforms?#PIRANHA PIT#didnt enjoy that one as much as skipper pavilion tho#anyway. it was so lovely id love to do that again but it doesnt feel possible in 3#for one thing. no way id have that many games in a row w the same lobby and no DCs all the way until map change#anyway if youre a sniper in splatoon dont worry about me hunting you. i am unfortunately so so so killable#one thing about me playing splatoon is that i be dying
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alright because it is now a list,
list of characters i want (need) to draw gore of:
My Elden Ring Tarnished
Linebeck
#salty talks#linebecks been on this list its my tarnished whos the new one. bc i was playing elden ring earlier#with linebeck is jsut like. i think itd be hot if he were covered in blood. yknow. the whole deal#with my tarnished its more me toying with the concept and it just working well with how i play her#as extremely aggressive n intending to Do Damage n just fighting through poison of scarlet rot or just facetanking attacks to get a hit in#im kinda interested in the idea that a tarnished can get pretty mangled up and keep going before getting killed#and i can have fun visual stuff with her since her face is covered by the guardian mask so i can play with clothing/armor damage#today i killed rykard (ridiculously fun fight btw. extremely fun) and thought abt like. her fighting recklessly and with the bloodthirst#to fight even while in the lava around him to the point where it melts away the bottom of her greaves and chars and damages her feet#i play elden ring like i play pokemon i intende to do as much damage as possible so dual straightswords and bleed buildup baybee#and my girl is absolutely just covered in blood covered in muck making a beeline for every boss every enemy#i like the idea that she joined the recusants specifically because she was bored and wanted more stuff to fight#i started off with the samurai background so thats interesting to factor into her- like she was fighting in that civil war#before she was compelled by grace to travel to the lands between and is kinda stoked to find out that she cannot die permanently#and is therefore free to take on everything the lands between has to offer. shes also probably a lesbian#siding with ranni using tiche as the main summon eager to help rya and probably nepheli#she likes women in some capacity. royal knight loretta is a fav. anyways. she prob gets torn to shit but if she can keep fighting she will#morgott was a very quick and frenzied fight for me i imagine she takes bad wounds during that but still pushes to keep up with him#she is. fun. this got beyond the point but also this was kinda an excuse to talk abt my tarnished
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You know, I have decided to go through a route with Impa that does humanize her, and I know why I did that and I like that I did that, but honestly there's absolutely room to interpret her as a Majora-grade villain, and that would both make sense, be terrifying, and be very interesting to unpack too
#thoughts#impa#oot#(I said oot but it would encompass every single one of her reincarnations)#I latched on the unquestioned servant angle because that is both how we are supposed to see her and also that it's normal and evident#which I wanted to challenge a bit#but#there's also the possibility that she lets herself exist as a tool#but has much more power over the course of things that we can even imagine#ready to sacrifice anyone and anything to make sure the Legend Keeps Occuring#she could be interpreted as the will of gods in a human shape#always there and always putting the pieces exactly where they belong#and that is also a super cool intepretation of her#I like Impa dead inside but Impa as the secret pin holding the cosmic horror show together is also incredibly compelling to me#(which she always is at least a little but I feel like there's levels of cognition and agency in that)#(and depending on how much agency she have she can either be pretty tragic or a full blown eldtritch horror)#(and both are fun honestly)
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Yeah of course I’m still thinking about plushies, what else (Patreon)
Most specifically thinking about magnets again - there’s the obvious of putting it in their hands so they can hold hands!
Of course if they’re on the same side i.e. right hand gets south polarity, left gets north, they’d only be able to hold opposite hands, so no handshakes (but I think that’s fine personally haha)
But on top of hands they could also have magnets behind their mouth! Kiss-magnets! My only real concern is the fabric pulling and developing kiss-wrinkles from being pressed against each other haha
They’d also be able to giggle with their palms to their mouths hehe, how cute! It’d depend on their kiss polarity
Which would of course depend on ship compatibility! Max has to be able to kiss Dex and Caleb, so if that makes it that Caleb and Dex can’t kiss, I mean that’s just an unfortunate side effect haha
#Doodles#SCII#Helix#Max Vyer#Dexter Favin#ZEX#And kinda-sorta Caleb under the cut - mostly construction speculations#Gah I want themst as plushies so baaaad#Baby steps thataway - I'm still unsure with the fabric I'm using but everything testing! Every little step forward!#Just the thought of getting to play with them hehe ♪#Also personally-funny haha - that black shirt has a gold zipper pocket on the front so it's a little like VUX medals to me hehe#Fun fun#I'll get to play with them eventually!!! I will!#Until then the speculations are still enjoyable :) About the different accessories to have on offer hehe#Since they'd have static faces what would be a good way to imply sleepies? Too scary to be tucked in with wide eyes lol#A sleep mask makes him look sleepy <3 I wonder what his PJs are like :0 Even when I drew him wandering around at night#I still defaulted to his usual shirt style but I've seen him in a T shirt! :0 Comfy cozy#Guess it depends on the season as well haha tho I imagine the Vyer estate has central air hmmm#Anyhow lol - poor ZEX! It'd be too easy to cover his plushie in stitches to denote Them and his MU and everything :')#I also like the idea of little velcro/magnetic accessories to attach to the face - so like he has the empty socket and a little patch aw#Would like very much to try dry-dying(?) his hair with the green tips as well - like putting that plush-blush on the cheeks but hair instead#It should be possible right!#Speculating hair shapes for Max - I think bangs embroidered right to the face are very cool! But I like the idea of flipping his bangs up#Not like Super long to give him an emo fringe or anything lol but just enough to cover like his upper lash line :)#Attachment parts are interesting for sure - almost gotta make like a wig-style design to go over his head! :0#But imagining the final version with him so cute and self-pleased and squishy and throwable haha <3 He's too cute!#All the stuff under the cut is fairly well-contained explained I think haha#Looks strange in a kind of x-ray breakdown but hopefully it'd be invisible once they're constructed! No weird pulling hopefully hopefully#Sure doesn't make polyships any easier sheesh - what if I want them all to kiss! What if I want them to kiss everyone!!!#Magnets and their binary polarity smh just gotta invent a dual-attraction haha
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pondering the idea of drawing watanuki as luka in the tailor of enbizaka because watanuki doing Girl Horror and being driven mad by jealous misplaced paranoia and murdering a bunch of people because he thinks he's being cheated on then dressing up in all their clothes and then murdering doumeki sounds fun as a detached unrealistic juicy concept treat
#and YUUKO AS CONCHITA!!!#i am aware theres bigger context and a whole evilousverse but like i mean just within the contexts of the songs and vibes#i want to dress watanuki up in fancy outfits and make him play fun little roles every so often like an idol in a drama#bjdtanuki strikes again#ok but IMAGINE if watanuki murdered several people in a jealous rage#its not realistic but it would be fun to play with like smacking barbie dolls together#maybe i shouldn't be talking cause#despite my au being designed to be as in character but also self indulgent as possible#and being meticulously sorted out in my brain#i cant get the idea of a bad end verse out of my mind#the vn writer in me needs to see it#when that fic finally gets fucking written i promise ill write a fucked up chapter where canary snaps goes feral and kills people#canary is a complicated and fascinating old man beast and i think he is very hinged and definitely will not cause earth shattering anomalie#and death omens#anyways art idea#faffing about#xxxholic#i guess
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very busy babysitting a duo of kittens (only two months old) the last few days but i shall be drawing when i return home (this includes requests)
and also if anyone wants to see the babies send an ask and i can post them in response hehe i have taken SO many photos
#yew branch#also i just missed a step on the stairs going down and ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow#i am now trapped on the couch until my back stops exploding at least a bit#upside tho is that the kittens are playing together on the couch#sometimes right on my lap!! theyre so so so so cute#i adore them#BUT YEAH i shall be drawing when i return home provided my back allows me to sit upright by that time#bc it sure isnt rn GDJSGJS#im sad ill have to go home tho.. these kittens are some of the cutest beasts alive#life is worth living because every day kittens are playing and having fun#i miiiiiiight be able to indirectly take one#one of my best friends might possibly be able/willing to take one and keep her with her own cat for me#until i move out of my parents house mid next year#so i might get to have... kitten that ive watched grow up from newborns...#the story behind these kittens is that one of my other best friends took in a stray and she turned out to be pregnant#and had these two!!#im also watching the three adult cats in this house but theyre not nearly as much of a handful#as can be imagined this friend is very tired of having 5 cats in the house regardless of how small two of them are GDJSVSN#which is very very understandable#i dont think i would want five cats unless i had a fairly large house. if i had a large house and plenty of free time most of each day#to give them play time and tons of affection#as well as the physical ability to keep up with them all#then id gladly have five cats#who knows maybe someday ill have a nice big house and plenty of spare time and my ddd will be under control#but that doesnt seem likely#aside from ddd being managed! because i have a pain relieving steroid injection tomorrow and then ill be starting physical therapy!!#im excited and i have a lot of hope for at least the physical therapy to help#PLUS THEY HAVE A POOL FOR PHYSICAL THERAPY!!!!!!! AND I LOVE SWIMMING ESPECIALLY AS A GENTLE WORKOUT#and low impact things are very important for my body specifically i cant do high impact exercise or itll hurt me#plus i just love being in water i swear i was meant to be an aquatic elf from dnd
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having an almost comically bad couple days so i'm microdosing on all my fixations by alternating episodes of kids in the hall, night court, h2o just add water, and conan o'brien remotes. just having a normal one
#the fun part of being the child of my alcoholic dad and junkie mother is that my form of vice is old tv shows#as i try to zone out while stone-cold sober#i had a bad day at work which was the capstone to a rough couple weeks#which is why haven't really been on here#and i'm pretty sure i can't trust my own vision or whatever because i look at things and get told i'm wrong#and then i found richard moll died so i'm not doing so great#i am so sad#i'm just so so sad and scared#all the time and i hate this so much and i hate being a burden to the person i love#and i just feel so alone and not good at anything and not good enough for anything or anyone i'm just not worth anything#it's my fault for only being able to conceptualize relationships via the familial bond#so i take my boss who is normally sweet and patient with my stupid worthless self#yelling at me as rough as you can possibly imagine#she didn't even yell at me specifically but every time she came by i flinched and any time i said something she got mad and yelled at me#i don't know i'm sorry#i just want to disappear#i'm also on my period one more cosmic corkscrew of pain
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what's 'The Warden and the Bear King'? :D
[an anon also asked this, so I won't be answering that one :D]
The Warden and the Bear King is a Wingfeather Saga AU! I can go into detail but it contains some pretty heavy spoilers for the Saga, and I don't know if you've read it. If you haven't, spoilers below!
The original idea was Artham, while wandering the Blackwood after his exit from the Deeps, finds the way back into the Deeps with the water from the First Well, rescuing his brother. The greater part of the AU is the roadtrip arduous journey across the Dark Sea to Skree. There wasn't really anywhere for the AU to go after that (if it followed canon, eventually the ending might be worse, considering Artham would never be melded and Peet's Castle never built, not to mention would the kids be the Jewels if their father's alive?). It was a fun AU to plot and write though!
#the wingfeather saga#there are like five different aus in my wip folder that have to do with how many people get off the island and how#and various possible ways for artham to have a fun roadtrip with various people he knows#artham wingfeather#wingfeather spoilers#the warden and the bear king#the original au was titled 'wingfeather bros' for the longest time lol#before i finally came up with the parody title#also i have a ridiculous amount of fun imagining the poor fang who had to go up to gnag and say they'd lost EVERY SINGLE WINGFEATHER
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sry im like willing myself to get up and brush my teeth and all that but im literally like Maybe i should finally actually listen to tbi. as in the bifrost incident not traumatic brain injury which it would be insane if there was a mechs album named traumatic brain injury.
#i legit never listened to it idk why i think i got scared n then yk and blah blah blah and yada yada and my granny died and yeah.so yeah#basically i need 2 listen and also i sort of just need to listen to every mechs album bc idk that ive fully listened to either of the ttbt.#<- i know a few of the stand outs but i havent fully listened basically.... and i miss the mechs so bad rn its crazy. i think they would#killing eachother over mild disagreements#i say that like its a hc im pretty sure thats canon i think its awesome. if iiii was an immortal space pirate whos only exists#to power the narrative and i was on a ship with like 7 other immortal space pirates who only exist to power the narrative.#well 1 me and those guys would be having the most insane sex possible crazy shit guns would ABSOLUTELY be involved we would#be fucking in the airlock opening the doors just for laffs itd be fucking wild shit. second of all yes wed kill eachother at least once a#day r u crazy andf itd be awesome. id make a to do list of every single death i could imagine and id do each at least 10 times and itd be#crazy !! wah wah immortality 1. seems fun 2. they die eventually 3. legit whenever they want they can just kill themselves and not exist fo#an hour tell me that isnt my dream world i dare you.#also ik ive exclusively talked abt the crew members which is kind of one of my pet peeves bc they legit arent the focus#but im nostalgic for them and rest assured the albums make me craaaaazyyy#mdni#minors dni#sorry i forgot what i said about the guns and whatnot#nsft#a2t#covering all the bases here
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