#but it was the only option they had
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#sorry had to repost this i accidentally set it for 24 hours#hate that the options are only 24 hours or a week it's so annoying#anyway i'm on job 8 if we count babysitting#but if we don't count it or jobs i've had less than a month then i'm on job 5#and i am 24
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thinking about the cycle of: women do better in school - more women become teachers - men are socialized not to listen to or pay attention to women - men do worse in school
#I’m wondering what the ratio of female to male college professors is and if it’s been increasing or not#obvs the majority of grade school teachers are women but academia still seems to me to be a male dominated area#I am 100% down for more female professors. I would always choose a woman professor in college if I had the option#but unfortunately most of my required classes for my major were only taught by men#if you have the option to choose a woman first CHOOSE A WOMAN. even if you have to go out of your way to do so
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Too many thoughts, too many questions and a liiittle bit of mixed feelings. @percico-nicercy-events
Edit: Added Percy's eloquent blob under the cut! Just be warned that some parts are alright, but some others are pretty dumb 🙈
"He’s ALIVE and just now comes to save my ass and THIS is the first thing he says to me, seriously?? What the hell I can’t believe he’s taller than me, wow, unfair. Alright so brain get your shit together, we get Riptide and go help, get up Jackson! It’s time to stop running, if you run away again Niccolò I fucking swear to Tartarus I’ll go after you and no matter where in this godsforsaken world you try and go this time, I’m getting your ass back this time around. Also is that a trident but with two prongs? Like dad’s? Alright I need one of those, that looks so badass and he seems to just whirl it around so effortlessly, with that damn leather jacket and the piercings?? I mean where was this kid I swear, I don’t even know if I’m mad or really, really glad to see him again after all this time, who knows where he has been and how many monsters he has destroyed all alone just like that. I can’t understand why this feels like a complete miracle at this point brain please cooperate right NOW-"
#percico#nicercy#percy jackson#nico di angelo#It's time! So excited!#Hiii guess who decided to do something for day 1 at the last moment#I had only two other pieces planned for this week but let's see if I can finish more!#Nico's shirt was supposed to have a cliche band logo on it but couldn't decide which one#what would Nico Di Angelo listen to? Death metal? Thrash? Glam? 2000s emo boybands? Too many options
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To warm up before the tournament itself, and to help me a little with bracket making:
Please reblog for a larger sample size, and follow if you haven't already and would like to participate!
#dinosaurs#dinosaur#poll#polls#saurnament#IT WAS VERY HARD TO GROUP AS MANY AS POSSIBLE TOGETHER IN 12 OPTIONS OKAY#is it obvious that this list became increasingly less scientific as i realized i only had 12 slots lol#reblog please#a large sample size would be great#going to be a little embarrassing if not many people see this#but hopefully enough people do that i get a good idea of how to matchmake
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Anyways, I was messing around making those characters of mine I've talked about all of twice and
LOOK AT THEM
(Kallen)
(Ophelia)
THEY LOOK SO GOOD
No feeling greater than finally finding a picrew that is perfect for your character. Like everything is just exactly what you need to bring them to life
#Kallen and Ophelia#first time I have been able to fully visualize them because when i draw them it SUCKS#Kallen's has slightly more feminine features than what i envision him having#but it was the only option they had
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We don't talk about how long ago I started this haha (there was supposed to be more parts but let's worry about that later).
You should roast Sampo all the time as a Belobog citizen duty.
#honkai star rail#sampo koski#trailblazer#serval landau#lynx landau#this was truly started ages ago and i only did the lynx part today but#gotta share it despite being INCREDIBLY behind in HSR and oof#being denied my game rights bc laptop refused to load the game and was just a black window no loading#then desktop needed to update and took over 45 minutes so i didnt play after cause i was napping while it finished#but then it didnt finish bc my comp went to sleep on its own#so then i had to CONTINUE to update and havent tried since but i should be able to play a bit today (hopeful)#despite what the trailblazers say here i answered every single option i could with happiness to see sampo cause it was funny
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if doctors looked for hypermobility in children you could give them appropriate physical therapy exercises from a young age as their muscles grow, orthotics to correct leg/foot placement, and where necessary additional support like professional k-tape application or other mobility aids before you obtain essentially permanent overtraining injuries from your poor muscles trying their best to stop you comedically collapsing into a pile of bones
but no it's just growing pains. kids don't have things wrong. it'll go away
#i'm also bitter because i have tibial tosion (my tibias grew rotated instead of straight)#this makes my feet point inwards aka pigeon toe#and because kids don't have pain. or whatever. nobody even FUCKING noticed untl i was 17#if anybody bothered before i could have had orthotics that wouod have gradually eased my bones back into the correct position#while they were still malleable#by 17 it was too late for that and the only option would have been breaking my legs#twisting them#and putting them back with a plate in the middle#and then re-learning how to walk#i did not do that
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not sure if anyone on here has seen it yet but the chances of arospec / aromantic melinoe have grown exponentially large. honestly may be canon atp
((screenshot from: @/TheScruffyCat on twitter))
#hades 2#hades game#hades ii#melinoe#melinoë#hades melinoe#hades melinoë#hades 2 melinoe#hades 2 melinoë#hades supergiant#melinoe hades#melinoë hades#aromantic#arospec#sippin coffee#i think it would be SO incredibly funny if melinoe only had one romance option (icarus) and didnt gaf about the rest because shes arospec#i genuinely cant feel any romance vibes from any other character unless its icarus or Maybe arachne#so i think supergiant could do the funniest thing and tease everyone with all these romance options#and then only give the players one#because mel personally just doesnt care#as someone whos arospec. i would love that immensely#as someone whos arospec. i would also love waxwitch immensely
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On the left we have yak and on the right baby alpaca and together they become the softest most annoying thing I've ever spun
#spinning from the fold appears to be my only option with how little the yak cares about staying put in my blend#destined to be a knit hate for my father-in-law#the staple length of the yak is at most 1.5“#wishing I had something like bfl or polwarth to bulk it out#hand spinning#yak#alpaca#wool#fibre#yarn#handspun
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It's a pretty cool name.
Loki + the progression of saying Mobius' name for @percheduphere
#mobius#loki#lokius#mcuedit#lokiedit#marveledit#owen wilson#tom hiddleston#tysm for the amazing request because GOD did making this hit harder than i'd even expected??#like it's kind of a given mobius fell first#but i've been so swamped all month i basically only had time to finish maybe a gif per night#and let me tell you watching loki progressively fall harder with each and every scene was uh. an experience all right 🙃😳#in S1 loki's so obviously trying to keep their guard up until mobius gets pruned protecting them and it's like a switch flips#the walls come down and you see the power of being believed in the pure RELIEF mobius' presence brings#how much he's valued and needed and LOVED as loki tries to hold him close only to lose him again and again#leading to desperation building until the only option left is to sacrifice everything not realizing now they're both left wanting#y'all i'll never recover 😭#marvel#owenwilsonedit#dianagifs
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not enough discussion about the gavins' complicated relationship with feminine-coded/beauty products, i don't think.
#for klavier because it's not as direct it's about how we never see him actually wearing lipstick? even though apollo literally attends#a concert of his which is where you'd most expect him to wear makeup. but apparently he just doesnt. or at least not in public#klavier gavin#kristoph gavin#i feel like there are several ways you can read into it. the misogyny/toxic masculinity one is really obvious clearly with kristoph's#singling out of men specifically and klavier's (probably accidental?) condescending manner of calling women 'fraulein' plus his general#mildly patronising attitude towards many of the women in the game (also probably unintentional)#(i think he's trying to be charming and it's coming off wrong to some of them. like ema. and me.)#but i feel like there's also maybe an element of... inherent perfecfionism to it? like both of these products are conventionally beautifyin#products and kristoph while he is open to showing people he uses nail polish specifically chooses one that's clear and missable unless you#see him apply it. he also feels the need to justify his use of it and specifically spell it out as something he chooses to do rather than#needs to do even though duh. that should be obvious.#idk there's just something about his seeming need to take control of that narrative that i find interesting. his need to spin it into a#'there's nothing wrong with my nails but I had the foresight to see that even the smallest parts of my appearance should be kept immaculate#and it's a choice i'm making to refine an already adequate part of my personage /not/ to cover some unsightly defect.' the need to emphasis#that specifically is so. hm. and with klavier i could see it being a case of him liking makeup liking the pops of colour yet being unwillin#to admit to it because he's afraid that other people might see it as him being dissatisfied with his own appearance regardless of if he is#or isn't. or even just perceiving colourful makeup as being unseemly because it's so overt and unnatural.#like i can see this as them both viewing 'real' beauty to be that which is inherent to a person and seemingly effortless#thus somehow negating the beauty which one achieves through cosmetics or other external means.#and if you want to use external means to achieve beauty or neatness or whatever then your only valid options are those which blend into you#natural state. like clear nail polish. or really awful spray tan.#i feel like klavier's less confined by these ideas (if they hold merit at all) considering he actually owns coloured lipstick and he wears#jewellery (admittedly quite 'masculine' jewellery no gems or pearls or anything like that but jewellery nonetheless) but i think it just#makes it more interesting that he doesnt seem quite able to cross the line anyway. like it's that ingrained into his system.#anyway that's all i've got. you guys should tell me what you think too#annotations
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Transmasc Summer 🐋🐚 Sims4 CC Masterpost
Top surgery - RFF Phalloplasty - Hysterectomy
───── ⋆ 𓇼°˖🌊 ───── INFO ───── 🌊˖°𓇼⋆─────
I've wanted phalloplasty scars in the sims4 for eons now as a few of my OCs (pictured above) have had bottom surgery, but no one had made any yet, so I decided to make my own.
I ended up going all out and also making a set of hysterectomy and top surgery scars to match the style of my phalloplasty scars.
This is my first ever cc!! So if anyone has tips or tricks or really useful tutorials pls send them over I'm very fresh to all this.
I've tried to make them all be Maxis Match and Base Game accessible!
Pose Used in the header image 🐚࣪ 𓈒
───── 🌊˖°𓇼⋆─────
Top Surgery Scars
Base game Compatible
Masculine Frame Only
Teen - Elder
21 swatches ( 7 top surgery types ((Double Incision, Inverted T, Keyhole, Periareola, Fishmouth, Lollipop)) with 3 transparencies each )
Can be found in the scar category ( front torso + right arm )
Free + No ads download
───── 🌊˖°𓇼⋆─────
Hysterectomy Scars
Base game Compatible
Both Frames
Teen - Elder
21 swatches ( 7 hysterectomy types ((5 laparoscopic + 2 open surgery)) with 3 transparencies each)
Can be found in the scar category ( fem frame in front torso + masc frame in left arm )
Free + No ads download
───── 🌊˖°𓇼⋆─────
RFF Phalloplasty Scars
Base game Compatible
Both Frames
Young adult - Elder
6 swatches ( left and right arm with 3 transparencies each )
Can be found in the scar category ( front torso + back torso )
Free + No ads download
───── ⋆ 𓇼°˖🌊 ───── DO NOT───── 🌊˖°𓇼⋆─────
Reupload (To here or any other sites, reblogging is welcomed though!!)
Put behind a paywall
Steal/claim the cc as yours
#my sims 4 cc#trans#trans sims#transmasc#trans ftm#sims4#sims4cc#sims 4 cc#ts4#ts4cc#sims 4 custom content#sims 4 trans cc#s4mm#sims 4 maxis match cc#maxis match#sims 4 download#sims 4 phallo#sims 4 phalloplasty#sims 4 top surgery#sims 4 hysterectomy#sims 4 scar cc#sims 4 scars#I wanted to make a few different options (ALT + Abdominal)#but I wasn't able to find enough references to draw something I felt was good enough to post#so I had to stick with only making RFF#that said#I'm really happy with how everything turned out :D#One of the laparoscopic hysto scar types is a replica of my hysto scar placement which makes me really happy#making my simsona that little bit more accurate to me is a really nice feeling#I hope this cc helps other simmers get to experience this feeling too !!
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sometimes you pull your knife on the thing that you assume is possessing your brother and demand it vacate the premises even though unbeknownst to you there's only one consciousness on the premises because when this entity took your brother's body it kind of immediately extinguished his mind almost without even thinking about it which is probably actually worse but also cmahn this entity is just a little guy
#art#oc#original#wormwood#connie#sometimes you just wanted to be a lesbian geologist and then your stupid transgender brother had to go on another fucking camping trip#and then disappear and be missing presumed dead by misadventure for like 2 years and yeah you are devastated bc you guys were so so close#but accidents happen in the desert and he knew the risks and so do you so youre trying to make peace#and then something shows up wearing your brother except it emaciated him and gave him effeminate hair#and you become so incandescently angry that the only option is violence#unfortunately the knife wouldnt even work to kill it but you dont know that#AND! YOURE HOMOSEXUAL#knife wielder is she/her#other is it/they
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He got dragged into a wedding dress butique at the girls' night out.
As much as i like putting robots in dresses, i hc that Omega honestly kinda dislikes/doesn't care for women's/fem apparel. In his eyes they emphasize all the wrong things (looking soft/dainty/sweet). Not to mention how impractical e.g. dresses are.
It took a lot of convincing get him to try the stuff on:
Rouge (currently rocking a party dress herself): “Do i give off [any of the words on Omega's list] vibes? How about Blaze (in a light summer dress) over here?"
Omega (who hasn't & doesn't associate either of them with "softness" etc.,): "mmmmmmmmmmm" (If he answers truthfully he's gonna get roped into "Say Yes to The Dress")
And Omega finds out that he doesn't mind some of the dresses. That a select few actually... look quite good on him:
They either clash nicely (depicted dress) in a way that accentuates his form by putting something soft & light against his angular & heavyset build, or bring up other positive aspects - things Omega only now learned to look for/analyse in fashion - e.g. boldness/grandness/fierceness. He doesn't mind that at all.
@generic-sonic-fan
#omega's got this weird bias on fashion... like if asked for Amy's vibes:#Amy'd be wearing something very femme & cutesy e.g. lolita w/ platformer boots#>Omega only regards the platformers - because they go in line with his perception of her noteworthy attributes#also#i'm a he/him or any/all Omega truther#but even if going by she/her - Omega's just very traditionally guy:ish#doesn't want to be seen as pretty or cute -type of masculine#especially “cute” is off the table > the depicted frilly cuffs had to go 😔 (i accidentally made the entire fit slightly too frilly)#(something a bit more shiny/lacy would probably do)#(maybe i'll draw some alt options but i dont have timeeee)#E-123 Omega#e 123 omega#rouge the bat#StH#sth art#my art#my hcs
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"are you asking me or making me?" is soooooo interesting to me because i think armand only asks it when he can't gauge whether he's letting louis down. it's barely even sexual - it's a hail mary. it's a show of trust, indirectly admitting that he wants to do something other than what louis expects of him, but that he's willing to obey louis anyway, for the sake of their relationship. it's sort of heartbreaking watching them at the sacré-cœur, because if louis had said "i'm making you" armand would've done it in a heartbeat. he would've taken it as a show of committment on louis' part, and he wouldn't have betrayed him. but louis takes the question just as an expression of disagreement, and so he doesn't play the game. ironically, he respects armand's independence too much to make him turn madeleine if he doesn't want to. and so armand isn't convinced of louis' commitment to him, and he betrays him.
and by the time we see them in san fransisco, louis knows what the question means now, and answers "no, arun, i'm not asking" without question. and armand accepts it without complaint, even as it pains him. companionship really is the most important thing in the world to armand, just like it is for lestat, and he's willing to do any number of horrible things to louis and himself just to keep him as a companion, just like lestat. louis' biggest mistake is not realising how to use that to his advantage sooner.
edit: HELP people are reblogging this again. i misremembered the context of the scene - louis is asking armand to witness the turning, not do it himself. still, if armand had gone along to witness, that would have 100% been taken as implicit permission for louis to turn madeleine (thereby adhering to the first of the great laws) and, in essence, "agreeing" with her turning where before he ordered claudia to drive madeleine out of town. this hypocrisy, and the further bending of the rules for louis' sake (he's given permission to turn a mortal despite neither of them being in the coven), would have been seen by the coven as betrayal. armand knows this; he doesn't think madeleiene should be turned for these reasons; that's why he asks, "are you asking me or making me?"
still. if louis had said "i'm making you" i think armand would've gone along to witness, implicitly giving his permissing for madeleine to be turned and functionally changing his allegiance from the coven to louis once and for all. so the core point of the post still stands.
#iwtv#loumand#thunder rambles#it really makes me hysterical because louis just wants to fuck around and find himself now here come exclusivity and#amatanormativity to ruin it all. move‼‼#i havent known peace since i saw that reddit post calling lestat's behaviour in s1 'jobless behaviour'. all the vampires really hate louis#for having friends and hobbies and theyre gonna make it his problem if it kills them#anyway yeah. i really really believe this. armand knew he had a loose grip on louis at best#and i think he never wouldve sold louis out if louis had made him turn madeleine. ironically#louis' biggest crime is uhhh respecting armand's disagreement with him. and having a life outside of him (claudia and madeleine)#that he wants to flourish#its so sad though because its all in service of ruining the family dynamic anyway#louis is feeling the walls closing in on him and claudia and so he elects to let her go n for claudia to have her trad 1-on-1 companionship#with madeleine#and after this he intends to commit to armand in much the same way.#its sad because how are the only two options 'monogamous partnership' and 'coven cult'.#louis should be able to have his sister-daughter-throw pillow AND his daughter-creation-in-law#AND fuck anyone and everyone he wants AND maintain very sincere connections to other vampires without it necessiatating#a companionship#the true villain of iwtv is the lack of relationship anarchy you heard it here first folks#interview with the vampire
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There are multiple gods in the game that you can directly interact with and they all have ties to the narrative. You can interact with Shar via Shadowheart. You can interact with Mystra via Gale. You can interact with Myrkul via Ketheric when he takes on the avatar form. You can interact with Bhaal via Durge and in the fight with Orin. You can interact with Bane after killing Gortash and using "Speak with Dead" in which the soul you speak to is not Gortash, but Bane himself. I would include Vlaakith in this list but Vlaakith is not a god, she is a lich presenting herself as a god. And, of course, there is the Absolute which doesn't really become a god until it ascends into the Netherbrain (although that is debatable).
But, did you know that Lolth will also interact with you? As far as I am aware, Lolth is the only non-story related god in which you do have interactions with. One of them is only available if you are a Lolth-sworn drow, and the other is only available if you are a Cleric of Lolth (you do not need to be Lolth-sworn for it).
The first instance is in the goblin camp with the spiders in the pit. This does require that you are a Lolth-sworn drow and that you have the ability to speak with animals. When talking to the spiders, you will have the option to present yourself to the spiders as Lolth herself. If you fail the persuasion check, Lolth gets pissed off as she was listening to you and is not happy that you tried to present yourself as her. And she tells the spiders you are an imposter and they attack you. But if you succeed the check, Lolth doesn't do anything and the spiders will think you are Lolth. So, Lolth doesn't really have a problem with you pretending to be her. But if you are going to pretend to be her, you better do it right. If the spiders think you are Lolth, you can ask them about what's going on in the goblin camp and the spiders only talk about one thing. They immediately tell you that there is another drow in the camp who has forgotten her way and that she is forsaken. And, as I said, Lolth is here. She heard the spiders admit this. Lolth does nothing about it.
The second instance is in the Underdark with the Phalar Aluve. When you interact with the sword, you have two different checks, a Strength check and a Religion check. If you do the Strength check, you can just pull it out of the stone and be on your merry way. If you perform the Religion check, the narrator will tell you different things depending on certain conditions. If you are a Lolth-sworn drow and/or a Cleric of Lolth, the narrator will tell you that the religious rite to pull the blade from the stone is blasphemous as it pays honor to the weak. If you are of any other race and/or cleric of any other god, the narrator will tell you that the sword is of Eilistraee and the rite pays honor to the fallen. The religious rite is that you spill a little bit of your blood and the sword will rise out of the stone on its own. If you do this as a Cleric of Lolth (you don't need to be Lolth-sworn) you will feel hundreds of spiders crawl all over you as Lolth is warning you not to do shit like that ever again. Not only did you perform the religious rite of another god, you performed the religious rite of a god she hates. And she is letting you know how much she hated that.
These are the only two instances in the game that I have found in which Lolth interacts with the player but there are plenty of other moments in which Lolth could interact with you, but doesn't (such as with the Phase Spider, the baby spiders in Grymforge, Kar'niss, or the dead spider in the Gauntlet of Shar). Of these two moments where Lolth does interact with you, one of these instances is in the goblin camp, and the other is in the Underdark not too far away from the goblin camp. I don't think it is much of a coincidence that these two interactions occur in close proximity to Minthara. Almost as if Lolth has a reason to be in that area specifically to watch and monitor things, and you just so happened to be there. And the only things that compel her to interact with you is because you pissed her off. But, as long you don't piss her off, she will do nothing and she will say nothing.
When Minthara was being tortured by the Absolute, she prayed to Lolth and begged Lolth to give her the strength to fight her enemies. But Lolth does nothing and Lolth says nothing. In fact, that was the full extent of Lolth's "punishment" for Minthara, nothing. All Lolth did was not answer Minthara's prayers and not show up when Minthara needed her the most. Lolth did not torture Minthara like the Absolute did, Lolth did not turn her into a drider, nor did Lolth eat her. All she did, was nothing. And yes, Lolth is known for abandoning drow and no longer interacting with them. A drow has to do something incredibly awful in order for Lolth to just back away from them entirely. But you cannot convince me that Lolth is going to let one of her Baenre's go so easily. It's not as if Minthara has done anything truly awful either to make Lolth that mad.
According to Minthara, she herself has sinned against the Spider Queen, but it's not as if she chose to abandon Lolth, she was forced away and mind controlled into being devoted to another god. But would this make a difference to Lolth? Does it really matter if Minthara was compelled to have faith in another god besides Lolth? It isn't until Minthara is freed and feels the absence of Lolth that she chooses to no longer follow Lolth. Minthara even mentions how turning against Lolth is a big no-no in Menzoberranzan. Minthara herself at one point has hunted down and killed those who turn their backs from Lolth so she knows the same will be done to her if she were to ever return home. In fact, if you are a Lolth-sworn drow or a Cleric of Lolth, you are given unique dialogue options with Minthara to kill her because she is a traitor to Lolth and these options continue to show up until you recruit her into your party and she joins your roster. Despite all of this, Lolth does nothing. Minthara spews anti-Lolth rhetoric left and right, and Lolth does nothing. If you take Minthara to the tabernacle, she will spit on a shrine to Lolth, and Lolth does nothing.
Minthara is also able to walk through the Gauntlet of Shar, which is in the Underdark, and Lolth does nothing. Sure, you could argue that its connection to the Shadowfell and the fact that Shar is there via Shadowheart is enough to keep Lolth away. The lore of DnD does not make it quite clear what the relationship between these two goddesses are. But I am willing to bet that Lolth is smart enough not to step on Shar's toes because Shar would annihilate her. However, there is a small little section of the Gauntlet where it actually does spit you out directly into the Underdark and into Lolth's territory. Minthara can walk right out there just fine, and Lolth does nothing.
But most importantly, Minthara's default ending is her returning to the Underdark with the sole purpose of destroying House Baenre and then killing Lolth. Destroying House Baenre could lead to a chaotic and political disaster in Menzoberranzan, and Lolth does nothing. Minthara quite literally wants to kill Lolth and has intentions to do so after taking House Baenre, and Lolth. Does. Nothing!
If Minthara goes into the Underdark and destroys House Baenre, this will cause chaos and death. And the Baenre's won't be the only ones she has to destroy, but any and all allies of House Baenre in which they do have a lot. And Lolth will feed off of all the death and carnage and chaos that Minthara is about to bring to Menzoberranzan because Lolth loves chaos more than she hates traitors.
Maybe, Lolth has not abandoned her as Minthara thinks she has. Maybe, Lolth has done nothing and said nothing because Minthara has not actually upset her. Maybe, Lolth has done nothing and said nothing because Minthara is already doing everything Lolth wants her to do. And all it took, was making Minthara think that Lolth abandoned her. There was no need for Lolth to answer Minthara's prayers, because Minthara always had the strength to fight her enemies.
#bg3#baldur's gate 3#minthara#minthara baenre#evil murder kitten#this game is all about the cycles of abuse and the characters choosing to break the wheel or continue the cycle#minthara is an example of someone who continues to cycle because she doesn't see that there is any other option#and the alternatives leave her vulnerable to abuse or death#she has had enough abuse in her life and most certainly does not want to die#when presented with the opportunity to rebound - either through bhaal or the absolute#she will choose it in a heartbeat as it is all she knows and she's familiar with it#if lolth ever speaks to minthara again - and welcomes and embraces her with open arms#i think minthara would completely relapse and devote herself once more to lolth because it is all she knows#and she expresses missing lolth and not knowing who she is or what to do without her#the only things that can pull minthara away from this relapse is you and her devotion to you#you are the only thing that can stop her from going back to lolth or embracing any of the other gods out of fear#because you are her reason to stay on the surface and you show her it is possible to defy the gods and live#you show her it is possible to have an identity outside of godly worship and that it is possible to live for one self#and to be devoted to one self#if you go with her to the underdark and successfully conquer house baenre and make your own house in its place#she's doing it entirely for the two of you#and i don't think she would accept lolths embrace and would continue to defy her
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