#but it also makes me laugh

[inkskinned]

she's singing in another room and my dog is asleep at my feet. my grandma asked me why i haven't found a man yet and i laughed. oh, you know. i like my house clean.

my girlfriend is also my man is also "my partner" if i'm in a professional setting. yesterday we went to a ren faire and a man mimed at me - you're together? and at my delighted nod, his baffled, you're gay? made me laugh. a woman with rainbow hair said i love the two of you together. you're both so beautiful it's absurd.

my dad introduced my partner as my "..... friend. or whatever" the other day. he knows we're dating. in the same way, i was never able to get my sister's husband to stop saying that's gay like it's 2008. he still uses the word fa***t, and my sister's defense of him has always been well, he's just kidding.

my lover and i dance to old music in a tiny kitchen. we judge new music together and take food critique very seriously. we watch love is blind before we fall asleep and agree that if they had a queer season, it would be bloody but also make for excellent tv. of fucking course queer people would know someone for only 2 weeks and agree to get married. what are you saying.

at a bar with friends, a man puts his hand on my wrist. got a boyfriend? and yes, i do have a boyfriend, she's amazing. i am texting her while i wander around a gas station named after geese. i am visiting a swing state for a wedding. in the candy aisle i overhear: she's actually like a lesbian it's disgusting. two teenage girls with packaged sandwiches in their hands, giggling. no literally, like. i'm not, like. okay with her being there while we're all, like, naked and changing.

my girlfriend and i tailgate, drink gin and cider out of cups. from the frat group beside us, a man corrects himself with one of his friends: bro, i mean, nonbinary entity, and it makes everyone around him laugh, myself included. he razzes his friend the same way i would have killed for at 19 years old - like nothing happened, he continues: you apply sunscreen like an alien. he does a little sassy (and fairly accurate) dance interpretation of the motion. his friend is laughing so hard they're crying.

i am lucky, i live in a safe neighborhood in a safe state. my masc passenger princess comes up from DC. i drive her for an hour to where all the leaves are a violent arrangement of color. we walk along the trails, letting autumn into our blood. in this part of the state, there's a lot of pickup trucks and trump signs. when we chastely kiss before getting into the car, i accidentally make eye contact with a woman holding her child's wrist. she looks disgusted. she looks fucking pissed.

two hours later my girl and i are eating dinner on a patio, soaking in the last warmth of new england sun before the chill of winter sets in. we are giggling and trying to talk through plastic vampire teeth. at another table, i see a young woman sit up straighter. i watch her watch us. she blushes and takes her partner's hand from across the table. shy, like the taste of evening has just become something deeper.

it's worth it for this moment, i think. my lover is still humming the same song she's been singing for four days straight and i don't want to kill her for it. her guitar is beside my bed. her toothbrush is in my bathroom. in a few moments i will make us lunch. we are lucky enough to have found each other. it is lucky enough to be in love.

[polarsirens]

Blimey.

[salamispots]

dream wip

[coveredinsun]

rewatching lotr, and rewatched the hobbit trilogy like 2 weeks ago, and i must say. i love this franchise for all its “i knew a guy who knew a guy” relations. like to give just one example, gimli presumes for a second, like the whole fellowship, that frodo got injured by the cave troll in moria. but he’s actually just fine! because frodo just happens to be gimli’s dad’s boss’s situationship’s nephew, and therefore has the mithril shirt that gimli’s dad’s boss gave to his situationship right before gimli’s dad’s boss led the company to battle against, among others, legolas’s dad. legolas’s old situationship from like last year (60 years ago) was also there and chose, get this, gimli’s dad’s boss’s nephew over him. i love yall

[braisedhoney]

okay but can you imagine—

[nimuello]

when you forget to check in with your bf before a date at the claw machines

[benevolenterrancy]

i'm sure this joke has been done before but i'm new here so now it's my turn -- the bing-ge vs bing-mei extra sure is something huh

[zenlesszonezero]

Join Zenless Zone Zero with Tsukishiro Yanagi, the deputy leader of Hollow Special Operations Section 6! Beneath her ordinary office lady exterior lies a meticulous, emotionally intelligent big sister to the team.

[egophiliac]

I've had a beast of a cold for the last few days, but I wanted to get this out before the new year! while I've sort of made my peace with my first take on Lilia's UM poster, I really wanted to do a version with the new context that chapter 6 gave us. because. c'mon.

(don't worry, Lilia can carry ALL HIS KIDS AT ONCE)

[aethersea]

I do think Blazing Saddles handled its one depiction of native americans very poorly, and the full extent of its representation of chinese workers on the railroad is they were literally just there. not even one single speaking line. unclear if this is worse or better than the redface.

it's fucking phenomenal at lampooning antiblack racism though. extremely blatant, extremely funny satire, which is constantly and loudly saying "racism is the philosophy of the terminally stupid at best and morally depraved at worst, and we should all be pointing and laughing at them 24/7"

plus the main character is a heroic black man who has to navigate a whole lot of bullshit but is constantly smirking at the extraordinarily stupid racists and inviting the audience into the joke. the one heroic white character is a guy who was suicidally depressed until he met the protagonist and they just instantly became buds, and he's firmly in a supporting role the whole time and happy to be there. the protagonist saves the day with the help of his black friends from the railroad, and uses the position of power he was given to uplift not only those friends, but all the railroad workers of other minorities too, in an explicit show of solidarity.

anyone saying "Blazing Saddles is racist" had better be talking about its treatment of non-black minorities. it had better not be such superficial takes as "oh but they say the n-word all the time" or "they have nazis and the kkk in there!" because goddamn if that's the full extent of your critique I very seriously suggest you read up on media analysis. there is too much going over your head, you need to learn to recognize satire.

[inkskinned]

having good & true friends will literally save and protect you in a million unfathomable ways. like okay we have written so many times about lovers. but the way a platonic friend laughs and cries with you. the way they hold your hand at 14 years old and at 34. the way they keep a little silver tie to you, touching base over and over and over. how you can go years without talking, only to re-meet and discover: oh shit! you're still cool!

there are people who have been in my life for more than half of it, and i have loved every version of them. do you know how fucking beautiful that is. yeah love will save the world. but the way friends love you is gonna save the you.

[laviejaguardia]

personally victimized by this show's soundtrack choices

[zenlesszonezero]

Join Zenless Zone Zero with Tsukishiro Yanagi, the deputy leader of Hollow Special Operations Section 6! Beneath her ordinary office lady exterior lies a meticulous, emotionally intelligent big sister to the team.

[ryan-sometimes]

A man in Brazil stopped a robbery with a katana.

As a Brazilian person, I feel it is my duty to occasionally bring to you wack news coming from my country. Lucky for me, about 2-3 weeks ago on August 13th, a man in Belo Horizonte stopped a robbery at his building by charging at the thieves with a katana. He has been dubbed “the samurai of Belo Horizonte”.

Here’s some real videos of the incident:

Here’s part of a news report on the incident from CNN Brazil. I did my best to translate it to English:

A man used a katana, a traditional sword used by samurais in Japan, to chase down a group of suspects who were attempting to steal bicycles from a garage in a condominium in Belo Horizonte, Minas Gerais (a state in Brazil).

Alisson D’jean, who became known as the “Samurai of BH” [Belo Horizonte] went viral when the images won over social networks on Friday the 25th. The robbery attempt, however, occurred on August 13th.

In an interview exclusive to CNN, Alisson says it was his mother who first noticed the robbery, after hearing noises of someone breaking into the garage doors.

The “samurai,” who is a physiotherapist, reported the experience on his Instagram stories, and said he decided to act on his own accord after the military police, according to him, did nothing after three previous break-ins to the condominium [by the same suspects].

After checking the security cameras, the [fourth] invasion was confirmed. The samurai put on some clothes, grabbed the katana, and ran to the elevator, where he met up with the building manager [who was checking the security camera footage on his phone].

“I grabbed this samurai sword, a handmade katana, a weapon of war, really, because I didn’t know what I was walking into, I didn’t know how many [invaders], I didn’t know what kind of weapons they had,” reports the physiotherapist, who says he began using this type of sword almost 30 years ago.

According to Alisson, the decision was taken with the sole intention of protecting himself, his family, and the other building residents. “At no point was I concerned with the bicyles. I don’t even own a bicycle,” he says.

In the images, it’s possible to see Alisson and the building manager in the elevator. After getting out [of the elevator], the “samurai” begins running after the suspects, who, scared, ditch the bicycles and flee. No one was injured. In the days following this incident, no other break-in attempts were reported.

Original article (in Portuguese).

[userarmand]

Interview with the Vampire ‣ "No Pain"

[flickering-nightfall]

If they release iterator plushies I'm gonna scream

[tofixtheshadows]

No offense to Mithrun but he really was dumber than a 14 year old. Thistle had that shit locked down for ONE THOUSAND YEARS. Sure he wasn't having a great time for most of it but in terms of duration that Minecraft kid was the most successful Dungeon Lord in history. Mithrun's fake little tea party collapsed and got him eaten within 5 years. The hubris of snake pussy. Meanwhile the Winged Lion had to orchestrate Delgal's escape to the surface and a whole fake hero prophecy just to get out from under Thistle's littlest jester boot.

[lady-raziel]

right wing trolls acting up on tumblr always fascinate me like what are you doing making a fuss about pronouns on the pronouns in bio website you’re in enemy territory like are you lost or something