#but in the meantime. horror concepts
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The year is 20X1, 23 years since Polaris and Sigma Octantis were last sighted at the celestial poles. Intrinsic expansion of space has increased dramatically over the past few decades, leaving our bubble of the observable universe awash with infinite darkness, the light of every star beyond our reach. If you are lucky, you might catch a glimpse of the rings that now circle above us, accompanying networking satellites and casting a glow brighter than our moon. The shattered bones of Tara Devi, numen of stars, now orbit us in place of the long-gone celestial bodies. If you catch sight of her face, do not fear; simply return home and go back to sleep, and if possible, ignore the pleading that may accompany you.
by Dhruva V. | 29 April 20X1 Broadcast: Sundered Skies
#tw unreality#<- just to be safe#this is fucking ugly bc i couldn't finish it !!! before photoshop died on me!!!!!#your patience is greatly appreciated until i get back my stupid subscription#in the meantime: big fucking horror. a very badly drawn fucking horror (i see that fucking shadow behind the opera house and im crying)#also is that the moon??? why is it red?????? just ask. my inbox is open JUST ASK ME <333#just very concept-y type art to portray the madness in my tiny head..... this is for the original novel btw#we all know im bad at concept art but ehhhh#also why sydney? specifically?? i live here :( boooo#this is so shitty but hey what can you do#kalkichronicles#desi#desi folks see this and they are like “wtf ??”#TRUST THE PROCESS BABES <3#artoftheagni#myart#now. time to eat lunch and speedrun a disease lecture
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I am rotating Light so hard in my head rn girlies who just straight up fucking torture ppl cause she can
#rat rambles#rain posting#oc posting#I <3 iterator gore and body horror if I was a better artist Id draw the horrors shes inflicted on some of these poor bastards#Im also brainstorming ideas for some more iterator ocs both so I can have more iterator ocs who arent chronically offline and so that I can#make them be some of lights victims and put them through some truly horrific shit#light vc omg haiii I saw you noticed some of the organisms I pumped into your bloodstream finally Ive been waiting sooo long to show this#stuff off so feel free to give mild resistance to my demands so I have an excuse to permanently disfigure your puppet :3#I have one girlie vaguely conceptulaized and some vague ideas for the sort of roles I want the others to have in their lil friend group but#its all still very very vague concepts Ill have to brainstorm some more to get more solid ideas for them#in the meantime Ive also been thinking of some potential unparalleled innocence hc stuff#nothing super concrete but I am slowly building some new hcs that will relate to the tortured girlie I have some ideas for#but yeah I had a blast telling my friends abt synchronized light today and getting my intended reaction of aw thats cute that turns into#horror as I progress down the timeline#my intent with these two is for them to initially come across as rly fun and cute and just generally very easy to connect to only for the#immediate second layer to their characters to fucking evicerate all of those feelings#also parasite horror is both some of my favorite (cause its horrifying) and least favorite (cause I can get legitimately paranoid) shit#and just the image of being an iterator and realizing that there is malicious shit inside of you that you werent able to immediately detect#is so delightfully fun to me especially considering how vulnerable a lot of these iterators probably already felt just letting the#construction and repairs happen only to find out that that vulnerability Was abused horrifically and that its far too late to stop it#anyways I need to go talk to myself in the shower to brainstorm some more lol
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the universe doesn't feel appreciative/grateful enough that I never commit to making the horror webseries I can think up
#Like ah yes the lost tapes of barney the dinosaur and the man-eating mushrooms#(I wish I was kidding I have an entire song for that one it started w me tying to remember the theme song and ended w a horror parody)#The only reason I don't go make some of that nightmare fuel real is bc it requires time and skills that I'd have to get other ppl for#Also some of them feature preexisting characters and idk when their copyrights end#In the meantime tho I'm working on some epic musical concepts and a wholesome comedy show featuring sock puppets-#My creative range starts at “I love you” and ends with “I wish I could eat you like a spider eats a bug” and does a whole lot in the middle
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Once the puppeteer, now the puppet. A Drone-Tessa concept I've been thinking about. Hopefully the 6 people who followed me after the 1st drone-Tessa post like this lol. If anyone here has any thoughts or feedback on this, tell me, I'd be glad to hear it!
A day in the Elliott manor,
It had been some time since Tessa had awoken. Or Cyn rather, as the Solver declared her name to be. Tessa couldn’t tell how much time went by in the ruins of Earth. The clocks hadn’t been working since Tessa awakened. And ever since the Absolute Solver broke Earth to pieces, the Elliott manor didn’t have a fluent day schedule. With each day having an sporadic length, sometimes lasting hours, minutes, or seemingly forever. Even during the night, light was still reflected onto the Elliott manor’s surface, but the other pieces of Earth. Ensuring there wasn’t any end to Cyn’s playing.
Tessa couldn’t tell whether she could call the planet Earth, anymore. The Solver turned Earth into a debris field, with its minor pieces orbiting its largest piece, which contained the Elliott manor, now Cyn’s liar.
“No, ‘the stage’ is a better name,” Tessa thought, while laying on her knees, scrubbing a rug with a sponge. “For a pointless house of living dolls.”
It was quiet in the Elliott manor. Cyn usually spent her time torturing someone, though not always Tessa. Cyn also played with possessed puppets on far-off galaxies, and now she was sitting dormant in Tessa’s old room, playing her game of cat and mouse with mankind. In the meantime, Cyn always ordered Tessa around the manor, cleaning it pointlessly.
The first thing Cyn ordered of Tessa, upon her awakening, was to clean the blood leftover from the Gala event. Which Tessa did, cleaning the room roof to floor, yet the blood mixed very well with carpets, dragging Tessa to a stalemate.
“Dammit, If she hates blood so much, why’d she flood the back woods with it?” Tessa exclaimed silently, while looking up. “I suppose this must’ve been how she thought when I was free.”
Tessa sighed, and looked to her right, where her eyes caught a portrait of her old self, with her drones, all assembled together alongside her parents.
“Ah, when I was free…” Tessa thought out loud.
Tessa looked at J's face, and smiled, thinking back to the laughter they once sang, and how eager they seemed to help her when her parents had seemingly left her.
“It was all an act,” Tessa thought, her smile frowning, as she turned back to the blood soaked carpet. “Just a mask.”
Tessa began scrubbing the carpet with renewed vigor.
“Mother was right, none of them really cared after all,” Tessa thought, remembering the emotionless look in J’s eyes when her builder got struck down. “Took my name, my family, my home, even my whole name. Mother wasn’t even this cruel.”
Tessa’s scrubbing slowed.
“I really was just made to be someone’s fool, wasn’t I?” Tessa thought. “First pushed around by the parents, and now by an eldritch horror.”
Tessa stopped scrubbing, before slamming her fist down on the carpet.
“What am I thinking? I am still an Elliott, no matter what Cyn says,” Tessa thought. “And Elliott’s don’t quit.”
Tess’s face grew angry.
“Some day, I will get out of here. I have to,” Tessa thought, slamming the sponge repeatedly into the stained rug. “And when I do, I’ll burn this stupid blonde wig, I’ll call myself by my real name…”
Tessa gave one last knock on the floor.
“And I will kill every last one of those 4 traitors,” Tessa thought.
Tessa’s momentum slowed to a halt, her eyes closed in contemplation. Finally, Tessa let out a sarcastic laugh, as she begrudgingly lifted herself up, and sat up against a wall, trying to breathe, yet her own metallic body failed to draw in air. Letting out a few shallow laughs, she felt an urge to cry, yet no tiers greeted her metallic face. Finally, Tessa sighed, and slouched back.
“But how?” Tessa said quietly.
#murder drones#murderdrones#murder drones art#murder drones fanart#murderdrones fanart#md fanart#murder drones au#murder drones tessa#tessa elliot#murder drones fanfic#murder drones cyn#murder drones fandom#drone tessa au#revival au#murder drones solver#absolute solver#cyn md#cynessa
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Manifestations and triggers of the ego and old identity.
Do you ever feel like whenever you try to better yourself that somehow your life just throws some drama at you? If so I’m going to tell you exactly why this happens and what you need to be doing.
When you try to manifest your new life you start to work on your self concept aka your identity. You start to asses what habits and beliefs you have currently that have lead to your current circumstances and life. You might identify which behaviors and beliefs no longer serve you and you start acting differently. The thing that happens is that as soon as you have this form of awakening and you start behaving differently from your current patterns your ego aka current identity starts to freak out.
I also want to note that I do not use the word ego in a negative or positive way it’s just a word to explain your current identity.
So our ego freaks out and tries to stop us from changing our thought patterns and behaviors cause if we change, that effectively means that we are killing the current ego. So in an act of self preservation the ego will attack you with doubts and fears as to why we shouldn’t change.
Let’s say you decide to change your self concept to someone that is in a loving and loyal relationship with a romantic partner. What your ego will do is that it will bombard you with every instance and painful memory in your life where the opposite was true in order to keep you from changing your beliefs.
Your ego will tell you that you can’t date or find the love of your life cause look at your friends, look at this person or that person.
You can’t find love cause the divorce rate is 50%. Romance is dead, dating apps have ruined romance and so on and so forth. The ego will keep feeding you as many negative thoughts and beliefs until you are so consumed by it that you forgot that you were trying to change your self concept.
Our self concept and identity aka our ego creates our reality. So when we try to change our self concept our current identity will fight tooth and nail for us not to kill it. And thus we have to wake up every day and fight ourselves. fight to break the habit of being ourselves (shoutout to Joe Dispenza for that phrase)
So when you start changing your patterns your ego is going to create situations and circumstances where the opposite of what you want is going to present itself and all you have to do is not react.
If we continue with the example of manifesting love. You might find yourself meeting men that are the opposite of what you want or you might hear horrible dating stories from your friends. What you’re not gonna do is internalizing those experiences . That’s not your reality. For every dating horror story there’s a success story as well, you just haven’t heard it yet. And either way you only need to find ONE good man so it doesn’t matter that there’s a hundred shitty men out there. That has nothing to do with you.
You’re gonna ignore anything that doesn’t serve you. The more you ignore the less these attacks happen. The more you focus on the new identity you want the old one will slowly starve itself.
So remember this. When you start to change your beliefs your old beliefs will come up to the surface. You might experience events and meet people that reflect your old beliefs. What you’re gonna do is that you’re not going to react to that. You’re just going to observe it and stay focused on the new reality you are creating. It takes time for the new reality to show up so you have to have faith and patience in the meantime.
#manifestation tips#glow up#manifestation#law of assumption#neville goddard#loa affirmations#edward art#law of consciousness#positive affirmations#spirituality#joe dispenza#law of attraction#meditations
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(takes out clipboard) tumblr user 7-ferrets-in-a-coat. survey says that people wish to see the god in the machine narinder design. will you please the people?
*Kicks feet like a schoolgirl* Oh my goood haiii user spilycoris that totally doesn't know what nari looks like thank you for the ask
Anyways you also get the backstory to go along with the Narinder design
+ Bonus , His voiceclaim is Niel Cicierega Specifically from the song Redesign the Logo , the main vocals
SO. Narinder was an Ai originally created purely to see how lifelike an intelligence could be, but Shamura eventually got a bit attached and after the studies were completed they couldn't find it in themselves to terminate the lad. Which. bad choice #1. Bad choice #2 would probably be the fact Narinder got Unsupervized internet access after a bit of successful pleading to Shamura because he was getting bored.
Tip, don't give a conscious Ai access to the internet because Narinder saw all the horrors and aggression and hate on the internet and turned Very bitter.
In the meantime the scientists started collectively working on a robotic body for Narinder to eventually reside in after he is socially formed, but after witnessing how Narinder was starting to express wishes of anihilation directed at humanity they decided to lock him out of "Having a body" rights
So eventually Narinder, now bitter , manages to escape containment and into the world wide web and nestles himself in Ludo's computer, because they seem like a person who could help him get freed and get past the radars / firewalls / Barriers/ bossfights (Idk, words) the scientists set up (for which i already got designs but we won't see them for a While)
OK NOW color symbolism /reference :3333
So you know Jesus? yeah? You know Jesus paintings? Usually he is represented with mainly 2 colored veils on him, Red and Blue. Red represents the Flesh, the humanity of Jesus, Whilst the Blue represents godhood, holyness. So Narinder has red eyes and features because he is overall Made by humans, his consciousness tainted by it, his very own Core influenced and molded by the hatred humanity has. He dresses himself in Blue robes, he Is a god, he wants you to believe that but. At the end of the day he is Human.
Also the marking on his chest is something that came later when he decided to manifest himself to the lamb and wanted to appear even more holy (And also a callback to my main cotl au where Narinder is trans)
Me when Paintings symbolism
ALSO thank you to that one good friend that helped with Shamura, Leshy and Kallamar, they helped with the Narinder Concept as well :3
#god in the machine au#cotl narinder#cotl au#narinder ai#sam maow chitters#asks#haii spily :3#cotl#cult of the lamb
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This concept has been microwaving in my brain for so long— Sharkboy and Lavagirl but what if they were anticapitalist Polynesian demigods fighting big resort corps. Character bios below for anyone who’s interested!
🦈
Akamu is the son of Filipino marine biologist Joseph Ambong and Ka'ahupahau, the shark goddess of Pu’uloa. Raised by his grandmother after his father’s disappearance, Akamu is a PhD student working to protect marine macroecosystems. He’s professional and aloof at first glance, but only those closest to him know how reckless he truly is. He tries to act cool but he’s a bit childish and has a soft side for puns. He also has a cringe obsession with Jason Momoa.
His mana was inherited from his mother and gives him supernatural strength, speed, senses, and the ability to talk to animals. His demigod form is more natural so he takes time at night to let loose in secluded coves. After some slip ups, he’s accidentally started rumors about a horror cryptid named the Sharkman. He’s very proud of it, though Keahi scolds him to keep a low profile.
🌋
Keahi is the 140 year old reincarnation of the volcano goddess Pele. When she was ten, her village was raided during the overthrow of Queen Liliʻuokalani in 1893. She was tossed into the ocean and lay buried in her demigod form until Akamu found her in 2010. She awoke with amnesia. She stayed with the Ambongs for a couple years and became close friends with Akamu. After Joseph Ambong disappeared, she bounced around the foster care system both on and off the islands. Her powers manifested uncontrollably during this time, resulting in several arson charges.
After a tough few years, she returned to the islands to work, regain her memories, and reunite with her childhood friend. She still doesn’t remember everything, but she’s trying to enjoy her life a little at a time. Keahi is a peacemaker with a strong appreciation for the natural world. She has a cheerful disposition and comes off as naive sometimes, but deep down she carries the kind of wisdom that’s built from pain. She doesn’t like talking about her past.
Unlike Akamu, her mana was transferred directly from the soul of a goddess, making her essentially immortal. In a thousand years she will become the living embodiment of young underwater volcanoes and new islands. For now, she’s just trying to appreciate living a mortal life (and taking down some greedy tourist economies in the meantime).
I’m open to asks about these characters! I think about them. Every day.
#is this an au in anything else other than name?#not really tbh. No taylor lautner here#the 2005 movie was horrendous but it slayed and I thank it for its service#sharkboy and lavagirl demigod au#sharkboy and lavagirl#sharkboy and lavagirl polynesian au#character design
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Dracula: Storm the Castle (Concept Poster)
Summary:
Wilhelmina Murray, a schoolteacher who goes by Mina to her friends, hasn't heard from her fiancé Jonathan Harker since he left on a work trip to Romania a few months ago. With no word and the months passing by, Mina has grown worried.
But then, a letter from Jonathan arrives. He explains that he is doing well and that he would like for Mina to come to Romania as a chance to scout the area out for their honeymoon. While suspicious of the contents, Mina now has proof that her soon-to-be husband is alive, and she knows his location. With her bags packed and a tearful farewell to her friends, Mina heads to Transylvania, Romania.
However, it does not take long for Mina to realize that something is amiss. How the townspeople react to the castle whenever she brings it up, the fact she is even having trouble to find a ride to the castle, not to mention the strange Ladies of the Castle who welcome her in... With no Jonathan in sight.
But Mina did not come all this way for nothing. No matter what horrors await her, Mina will find Jonathan and they will get married. They both waited long enough.
End of Summary
Hello fellow people of the Dracula fandom! I'm sure you all saw my draft ideas on how I would try to adapt Dracula floating around the tags. Being introduced to the pairing of Jonathan and Mina has done something to my brain and I felt compelled to get my ideas out there.
I would like to make this into an animated show since I am a storyboard artist but, in the meantime, I wouldn't mind posting all my concept art for my idea. Stay tuned cause I'm planning on doing concept designs for Mina and Jonathan, maybe the Vampire Sisters as well.
#my art#darky draws#dracula#re: dracula#dracula daily#jonathan harker#mina murray#mina harker#jonmina#jonathan x mina#Dracula: Storm the Castle#art#concept art
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On one hand, the reader having to carry whatever Typhus put inside her is a horrifying concept. But on the other hand I am a little bit curious if this whole thing will lead to her having his kids (since I’m pretty sure that’s what’s being implied in the fic). Because while there’s definitely the possibility of the reader’s child being some kind of horrible warp daemon in the guise of a newborn. There��s also the possibility of the opposite happening, the reader is a perpetual, which is something that can canonically be passed on from parent to child. So imagine a rotting, decaying, plague ridden Typhus hanging out with his kid, who is just completely normal. No diseases no infections no nothing, a perfectly healthy child who is unfazed by all the nurgle horror going on around them
These are some fun hypotheticals, anon! While perpetual!RT!Reader is carrying Something Else in the fic, Typhus would be... So Normal about his wife bearing him one/multiple children. So have a couple of non-canon snippets of Typhus, his child and perpetual!Reader!
warnings: body horror, kidnapping, lying
"Easy, Caeran, steady. Breathe in deeply, let your mind and hearts be still." Calas murmured to his child.
They held the training sword in both hands, trembling with effort, having tried and failed to overcome the shambling poxwalker that father had summoned for them to use as a training partner. "Yes papa." They panted out, leaning into one of his legs. They were frowning adorably in concentration.
An affectionate smile warms his face and Calas kneels before bending over and giving them a kiss on their forehead. "My fierce little warrior-priest." They had been blessed with their mother's eternal nature and had shown some additional psyker abilities. They were also, in his entirely un-biased opinion, the most wonderfully precious and precocious Aspirant to ever exist. Only a handful of his most trusted Brothers were even aware that Caeran was his son. Most of the others believed that he was merely a talented and very young psyker whom Calas had been led to by Grandfather's Will.
Caeran giggled and kissed their papa back on his cheek before returning to the sword-forms that they were learning. Several of papa's bees buzzed around them and landed on their head, watching and listening.
~
"But.. Why can't I play with the other aspirants, papa?" Caeran asked, a pout on their lips as they fold their arms over their chest, mimicking Typhus.
"Because you're stronger than they are, and you, like me and your mama, have psychic gifts given to you by Grandfather. The others do not, and psykery is often thought of as scary, especially from the awful world that I rescued them from." Typhus explained. He was not going to be moved by their adorable mimicry, nor their pouting. The newly acquired aspirants had been liberate from a corpse-worshipper world, and had yet to truly acclimatize to their new surroundings and liege lord. Ultramarines, even very young ones, were self-righteous and stubborn as fuck.
He had no desire for their foolishness to infect his child - especially as Caeran's healthy body and vibrant mind would make the soon to be converted Ultramarine Aspirants assume that they were also held captive aboard his fleet until they surrendered to Grandfather's Will.
Which wasn't true, but they had no way of knowing that.
"Mama said that it was fine if I played with them! So why are you saying no?" Caeran huffed, pouting more up at Calas.
He was not going to give into their pouting… And it seems he had a mischief-filled wife to gently scold. "Because they are confused right now. You will be able to play with them later."
"Awww… When is later going to be?" Caeran whined, looking up at him pleadingly.
"I can't say for sure. But I will tell you when you are able to… In the meantime, will you help me count the Little Lords who are wandering around on the upper decks? More of them have shown up recently." Calas asked, trying to divert his child's attention.
Caeran beamed and nodded "Yes I will papa! I love playing with them!" And they ran off to go chase the nurglings, giggling as they pitter-pattered away.
~
"-nd that was how I was able to convince the governor of Ablenshwein to join the commonwealth I once ruled over." Mama explained, smiling a little in the memory.
"If you have a commonwealth, why don't we ever visit any of those planets? Why are we always stuck on papa's ship?" Caeran asked, tilting their head a little up at you "I wanna know what grass feels like beneath my feet! I wanna know what it's like to be outside. How come we never get to leave?"
Mama's smile faded and she felt very sad for several moments before scooping them up and hugging them tight to her chest "I… Your papa is very protective over the two of us. He worries that if we go to a planet, we'll be lost to him, and he doesn't want that."
"But… But Papa says that you and I can't die. That we can't get sick, or be afflicted with the gifts of Grandfather Nurgle, like other people, which is why we look the way we do, rather than like papa or his brothers and the cultists." Caeran pointed out a confused frown appearing on their face. "How could papa possibly lose us, if we can't die?"
Mama was sad again, though she was still smiling at them. "There are other ways to lose people, other than death. He's worried that you and I would get separated from him. That he wouldn't be able to reach us."
"But that's silly! Even if papa isn't with us, some of his bees are, and he knows where all his bees are at all times." Caeran pointed out, still confused.
"Planets can be much larger than this ship, and his bees can only go so far away from him before they vanish back into the warp. Now, how well have you been able to sneak around, my heart?" Mama asks.
Caeran giggled "I was able to sneak through the vents for hours and no one noticed! I was also able to talk to the new people on papa's ship. The ones that felt scared and unhappy, like you told me to. They were really surprised that I was there, just like you said they would be! Their armor kind of reminds me of papa's, except that they're different colors and they didn't smell."
"Very good, Cae! Were you able to tell them what I asked you to?" Mama pressed, her eyes wide.
Caeran nodded "Uh-huh. I told them every word of what you told me to tell them. They thanked me for the message and were pretty confused about it. But I think that they'll listen."
"Good job. Now, you know that this is a secret between you and me. No telling papa or his bees or anyone else who obeys papa." Mama reminded them.
"Yes mama. I know mama. It's a secret surprise that you an' me are working on." Caeran huffed, rolling their eyes a little. Mama could be so silly about these things. Of course they were keeping this a secret from papa. Papa would scold him for going near the new people and causing mischief.
#typhus the traveler#calas typhon#cw body horror#death guard#oc: caeran#cw kidnapping#cw lying#reader insert#child oc
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You voted for, so let me translate the entire poem
youtube
Let us talk about god About blind faith, and cold logic, and a lacking purpose A pale alternative to a pointless and alienated existence About the mantle and the lady and all that is familiar And the bitter truth of the thorn in the rose And the dangers of sugar and the cold reality Let us talk about god dsgnruwhurjehgtsbvalk
That is what I managed to write before the cat jumped on my keyboard Glanced at the words, glanced at me, glanced at the words And turned to lick its own ass
"Well, what's your opinion?" I asked it, for it is known cats do not tend to spare criticism If you wanna hear "Wow what a beautiful song" go and ask the dog For the truth, turn to a cat
Left the ass, glanced at me Glanced at the words, glanced at me His entirety is a Nietzsche's mustache The eyes of the abyss that looks back at you Uberkatze that will soon herald that god is dead (supercat, a reference to Nietzsche's "uberman") Opens his moth to talk, and thus spoke Zarathustra: "For someone who claims that god doesn't exist, you write about him a bunch, do you feel threatened?"
What? Threatened? From what? A flying spaghetti monster? No I just think that faith and god is a cool concept
It scoffs and responds: What do you fuck about? You dig (talk an excessive amount about something) And are an infidel And forces to confront And freeze in your place From the horror of the truth Because Darwinist monkeys Tried to trick To pile stones That cannot be lifted And cells from a fetus And a fossilized snail And big bangs And facts that most, as all Dwarven (become small, as dwarfs) On the banks of the everyday Of 7 billion Yearning souls From the heart of each land To the shore of each sea Go and tell all these That god doesn't exist
And then it hit me: The religification has come to me in my home! Because of course, a cat that once in Ancient Egypt was a god Now that were back to writing in emoji hieroglyphs, and the cat-worshiping gets a rejuvenation on all the walls of the internet Of course the cat will stand up to the side of the messianics, the darkened, the preachers and return-in-answerers (to return in an answer is a jewish idea, which I am unqualified to explain, but in this context it means to become religious) Well - Not in my house I won't be silent and I won't accept Religious compulsion from the mouth of a creature that licks its own ass
And it tells me: From the perspective of a cat Things are a bit different There is no Damocles' sword of time that is ticking Death approaches The end of the movie And in the meantime, we eat, and fuck Without doubting The world, ourselves By Allah Ya Allah You digged With all that messing around with "purpose" We start, we decay There's no one above No stairway to heaven Hell has no elevator
Well, exactly, so why search for imagined meaning? Why not settle for what there is - We were born for a short existence, kitty Let us fulfill it instead of casting the responsibility on some kind of creator There are better things to live by
Like what exactly?
Yes The tree is but a tree And the sea is but a sea But has anyone ever Seen democracy? Touched an ideology (In order to get the feeling of its texture) Or grasped an idea? Just today I hunted justice And I held a vision I hadn't met a cat That had counted its steps By a measure of morality Or a written contract Ironically you with the brain You don't have smarts Just the mercy of words That will build you a dam To stop the nothingness And to act as a reminder But the nothingness is winning I am sorry to herald And yet there's no shame in filling that which is empty Even you -
Me? I am a nihilist anyway, I don't believe in anything
Even you Rise very morning to work For money, a feeling of recognition and honor Maybe money exists if people live for it? If people are held by it? If people are worth because of it? If people fight, vouch for each other, sacrifice for it? If there's money, then there is god, why not? Nations and peoples and states ignite Flames in tens of thousands of hearts As far as I am concerned if all of them exist than god does too
Let us ask the audience, we'll do a survey here Who's more real, god, or Brad Pitt? Sorry for shoveling messages down your throats But no one ever died for Brad, the poor guy Certainly hadn't lived for him What is true: You You examine in a magnifying glass A view that's seen by a telescope Fight for flags And scoff at a horoscope If faith is a perspective Then the world's a kaleidoscope If life is a raging sea Then god is a periscope One can see with him high up And all looks clear If you hadn't begun to sink by now For this pitcher is hollow Take the word of a cat Every time over You kill god To crown under him A different hollow pitcher
You wanna talk about god? Let us talk about love Where is this love that you talk about? That you sing it?, that you write it? That you live it, you experience it You die for it, you kill for it Where is the evidence to prove the existence of this love? This catalyst, this causer The motive, the engine of life The battery of the existence, the fuel of the soul Where is this love? If there is no god, what about your love? If there is no god, what about love? If there is no god, what about love? If there is no god, what about love?
Its mustache bristles, and his eyes are boiling fire He finished And returned to lick its ass
I should have asked the dog
#david original#טאמבלר ישראלי#טמבלר ישראלי#ישראל#ישראלבלר#ישראלים#עם ישראל חי#עברית#חרבות ברזל#ישר#ישראבלר#ישרבלר#jewish history#jewish#jewblr#jewish tumblr#jumblr#Judaism#music writing#new music#music video#songs#tunes#musician#musica#music#david-translation#song of the day#Youtube
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This has been sitting in my sketchbook for a while gathering dust. I was intending to line/color it digitally, but with school going on that might take a good bit longer to actually happen. Might as well share the sketch in the meantime.
I've talked about this vaguely before but I think, despite their extreme differences, Ed and Double D have a certain overlap in their interests. Ed likes gory horror/sci-fi media and the concept of monsters/mythical creatures/aliens etc. Double D likes bugs/arachnids and isn't exactly skeeved-out by descriptions and depictions of less than stomachable medical ailments. Ultimately when hanging out these subjects will pop up on the frequent. Ed likes grotesque stuff and Edd knows a lot of grotesque stuff that people don't typically like to hear about. This means a fun time for them...excluding Eddy...
#if you see me spelling precisely wrong no you didn't I'm not in the mood to go back and retake these photos#btw anyone else saw that episode of planet earth where david attenborough talked about this fungus?#it is horrifying but so so fascinating to me when I was in middle school#I love finding excuses to make edd's hyperfixation on insects be specific to hymenoptera because I think it being so specialized is fun#fanart#eene#moth art
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My novel, Total Entropic Denial, is now available to read for free on Royal Road!
April Pearce's world feels like it just might be falling apart. Her restaurant job leaves a taste in her mouth almost as bad as the food they serve their customers, her kinda-sorta girlfriend is probably, almost-definitely mad at her, and despite her best efforts, she can't seem to stop her neuroses from leading her face-first into bad decisions and bloody accidents. But as if that wasn't bad enough, now it seems that there might be a very real chance that she's losing her mind. As a series of inexplicable and increasingly horrific occurrences lead April to question the fundamental nature of her reality, staring an incomprehensible truth in the face will strip her down to the deepest marrow of her soul, and leave her straddling a line between two twin terrors; that she's either going insane, or, even more terrifyingly, that the things she's been seeing are absolutely real. Following those questions to their conclusion will lead her to new horizons, throw her into conflict with unexpected enemies, and make her even more unlikely friends. As the boundaries of reality start to crack wide enough open to catch glimpses of the horrors that lie outside of their confines, the scope of her struggle starts to tend towards a yawning infinity. Wherever this path may end, one thing's for sure; once we get there, nobody will be able to shut their eyes and ignore the consequences.
Total Entropic Denial is my experimental Science Fantasy/Horror novel, with the guiding ethos of experimenting with high concepts while also getting extremely weird with it. This is the largest creative project I've ever undertaken, taking up almost the entirety of my 2023, so it'd really be cool if you'd check it out!
Total Entropic Denial features queer characters and relationships, alien worlds and creatures, and body horror. It is a mature work that at times deliberately seeks to provoke, so I will up front provide the following:
Content Warnings: Violence Blood Explicit gore Explicit sexual content Shocking content Situations of ambiguous sexual consent Depictions of homophobia Depictions of transphobia Death Existential despair
The book fully free and available to read online at the above link. I would have liked to have optional monetization, but unfortunately I can't add a PayPal donation link to the Royal Road listing without exposing my deadname. In the event that a significant number of people want to do that, let me know and I'll figure something out. In the meantime, please leave a review and/or share the book around!
Additionally, I want to give big thank yous to @ericvilas, @fipindustries, and @theothin for beta reading this for me, as well as other help and encouragement received!
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i know this is probably waaay too early for you to know, but do you have any plans for future projects after AToC’s completion?
I do!! The next IF I'm planning on writing will be much, MUCH smaller in scale and much shorter than AToC. Mostly to give myself a break after finishing this behemoth of a story, but also to experiment more with the IF format. It's easier to do that in short form than with a game that will probably end up being close to 1 million words lol
It'll also be very different from AToC in setting and tone, though it won't be far off from fantasy and it will definitely retain romance as its core. I have a basic concept for it in my head, and I can see it leaning towards dark fantasy/horror, but nothing is set in stone yet.
As such I also don't wanna blab about it if I end up discarding the idea at a later date, since we're still quite far off from AToC being finished, and I don't want to end up disappointing anyone.
But it's definitely marinating in my head in the meantime!!
#ask#anonymous#about the author#4-5 years of marinating should make it pretty good#and after finishing atoc im sure i'll blow right thru a shorter IF#altho lemme not jinx myself lol
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Lifting my self-imposed embargo because I'm weird and don't like posting on social media when I'm on vacation.
I'm at a point in my life where I can financially justify at least one international vacation a year and figured I'd finally cross off the Great White North from the bucket list. I'd never been and Andrew hadn't been back in a very long time despite having dual citizenship. Anyways, just got back, and a bullet-point breakdown of the highlights is after the cut:
I wish every international flight was under two hours; EWR to YQB was almost comically fast.
Had my first French conversation with the very nice lady at the car rental counter for about ten minutes. She complemented my pronunciation and grammar, and wished me luck on the trip. Every French interaction after this point was a linguistic battle for my life that I lost (Toutes les Québecois parlent trop vite pour moi).
We had some time to kill before the hotel check-in so we went to a mall in the suburbs just so we'd have a food court with some options. Turns out shopping malls are not only alive and well but fucking thriving in Canada. I haven't seen a mall that packed with people outside of December since the nineties.
Quebec City was very dense with old architecture which made it feel very European. It was also apparently built on a fucking cliff with streets at 60 degree inclines, which also felt very European.
Took a tour of the Quebec Parliament building (beautiful structure), and apparently they used to be bicameral, but voted to abolish their Senate in the 60's and they were the last Canadian province to do so. What a concept.
It's one thing to know on paper that Canada has about 1/8th of the population of the US, but I was not prepared for just how empty the countryside felt. For someone like me, living in the northeast my whole life, the idea that cities in close proximity to each other not having continuous stretches of suburbs and other smaller cities connecting them was completely foreign.
On the highways I kept thinking I was speeding because I'd look down at the dashboard and see the number "100", but 100 km/h is only like 62 mph, which is nothing.
Similarly, I kept getting sticker shock every time I spent money, and kept having to remind myself that $1 CAD was like $0.73 USD while we were there.
It was really cool to see that the complex for the 1976 Montreal Olympics is still maintained and actively used (we stumbled upon a skateboarding competition and I did not feel cool enough to be in that crowd). Sometimes you hear horror stories about Olympic villages bankrupting cities and falling into disuse afterwards, but that's definitely not the case here.
Montreal is apparently known for their local bagel culture, but their bagels have enormous holes in the middle of them, so you have less cross-sectional area for spreads and they don't really work for sandwiches. My faith in NJ/NY bagel superiority remains intact.
Every city we went to had dedicated bike lane infrastructure and young families with kids, but Montreal definitely had the most of both. Tons of parks, too. Simultaneously felt like a larger and smaller city than I was expecting.
Poutine is okay, but I wasn't prepared for the cheese to squeak when you bite into it. Very odd sensation.
The main Parliament building for the federal government in Ottawa (Centre Block) is stunning, but closed; apparently it's been under renovation since 2019 and isn't expected to be reopened until 2032! In the meantime, we took a tour of where the lower House of Commons is currently meeting. We learned that their electoral districts are routinely re-drafted by a non-partisan committee and that they occasionally add new seats to the legislature to account for changes in population. I had to seethe jealously in silence for the rest of the tour.
Also toured their Supreme Court building (way more Art Deco than I was expecting). We learned that there's currently a vacancy because a Justice recently retired because they're required to step down when they turn 75. I had to seethe jealously in silence for the rest of the tour.
Every single city had automatic/self-serve parking garages where you didn't have to interact with a human (which I was very thankful for), but in Ottawa they have this little jingle that the machine sings at you when you take your ticket, which I found very amusing.
On the drive to Toronto we took a quick detour into the Thousand Islands (yes, like the salad dressing) and visited Boldt Castle, which is technically in New York state. After seeing it in practice, the idea of living on your own private island is more appealing than ever.
Toronto feels like an exercise in what happens when a nation's largest city is allowed to grow without being hemmed in by ridiculous geography. As someone who grew up in NYC, this is another concept foreign to me. The GPS did get very tripped up navigating a particularly gnarly interchange however.
Toured the Ontario Legislative Assembly (yet another beautiful building). At this point we were really good at asking tour guides stuff like, "so if happens, do you guys have a plan?" To which they would reply, "well, no, but let's just hope that never happens!"
I now understand why the Great Lakes are effectively freshwater inland seas; you really cannot see the other shore, and Lake Ontario isn't even the biggest one!
YYC to EWR was under an hour. That's definitely going to spoil me for future trips going forward.
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Dead Beats
I release an rpg every week, and a lot of them are one or two pagers with a goofy concept and some simple mechanics. This is because of the large, ominous pot bubbling loudly at the back of the stove.
That pot is the thing I've been cooking in the meantime, which in this case is Dead Beats.
Which launches on Wednesday 4/3/24 at noon.
Dead Beats is a grimy 1990s stylish action horror ttrpg. You play as a down-on-your-luck loser who fights demons because no one else will.
Tonal influences include Devil May Cry, Jujutsu Kaisen, Evil Dead, and Chainsaw Man. Also the writings of Joe R Lansdale and the Constantine Hellblazer comics by Jamie Delano.
Mechanically, Dead Beats pulls from a standard poker deck instead of rolling the dice, and this is so you can mark your cards, add new cards to your deck, know when all the face cards are depleted, etc.
It's also very much played in two phases---everything else, and combat.
Dead Beats' combat is inspired by fighting games and beat-em-ups. Weapons are locked to your character, and have deep upgrade trees. You can chain multiple actions together, but the more you chain, the more your fatigue builds up, and the more likely you are to drop your combo.
Fights are fast. Turns are meaty but quick. And you end up with a lot of options outside of the game's core moveset depending on how you customize your outfit.
Again, this game has been cooking for a while, so it's going to end up as a slightly beefy book.
If anything I've said here sounds good to you, feel free to pop over to the kickstarter page and hit Notify Me (if it's before Wednesday,) back the kickstarter (if it's after Wednesday,) or put down your device and squint your eyes at the rad-soaked horizon hoping the cybercrows don't come back (if you found this on a battered tablet in the distant future's desert ruins.)
#ttrpg#ttrpg homebrew#ttrpgs#ttrpg design#indie ttrpgs#rpg#indie ttrpg#tabletop#dnd#rpgs#devil may cry#card games#urban fantasy#grunge#chainsaw man
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How would a self aware!Walrider Miles Upsur feel about a player!darling? Would a concept be possible? Thank you!
Oh sure! I was actually replaying the original Outlast for this fic :D Forgot how much I love it!
Yandere! Self-Aware! Walrider! Miles Upshur with Player! Darling
Pairing: Romantic
Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Self-aware AU, Violence, Blood mention, Stalking, Invasion of privacy, Slight intimate implications, Miles gets religious, Pining/Yearning.
I have a feeling Miles only had an acute sense of being self-aware before he became host to the Walrider.
He had a feeling someone or something was guiding him through the horrors of the asylum.
Yet he had no idea what.
In this AU I'd like to consider the Walrider a connection between Miles world and your world in a way.
Just for this AU the entity has this power.
This could show some explanation for why it's so worshipped in the asylum.
Miles just thought it was the fanatic worship of experimented on patients.
He isn't the most religious person, so he doesn't think much on it.
Miles doesn't fully become aware of there being something much more out there until the Walrider takes him as a host near the end of the game.
It's with the Walrider's help that he finally sees.
Call him crazy but after that he's pretty sure this whole journey he'd had is just a game.
He should've seen the signs before, yet now the Walrider has confirmed everything.
No wonder when he though he died he woke up fine... he was resetting.
Those glimpses of someone he saw? They were his player.
The Walrider was not hurting him... it was helping him.
It has been trying to help him see.
Miles obsession starts like most self-aware yanderes.
He's obsessed with the idea of knowing more about you.
The Walrider is trying to help him learn more, but even its influence isn't strong enough.
With the Walrider's help, Miles can see you through your screen.
Through the Walrider, Miles can learn more about you from watching.
While you're unaware... Miles watches you closely.
The Walrider can sense Miles' emotions and does whatever it can to feed into Miles feeling of obsession towards you.
The Walrider feeds off of the feelings Miles experiences towards you.
Be it obsession, yearning, love, lust, jealousy, whatever it may be... The Walrider feeds off it.
When the Walrider took over, Miles gained control of himself mostly.
You no longer guided him... and you had no idea how intently he was watching you.
In his world he only ever saw violence.
In the asylum he's seen blood, gore, gruesome murders, and scenes he wishes he could purge from his mind.
Now... the Walrider has presented him a gift.
Perhaps that pastor was right, now he can believe.
The Walrider can help him obtain something divine.
It can help him obtain you.
The Walrider always tunes him in to watch you.
Anything you do in front of your screen, be it a TV or PC, Miles can see it.
He watches you like you're the most amazing being he's ever seen.
In a way, he saw you as a God.
An angel.
Something divine.
You're a blessed sight to him compared to the blood that coats these walls.
Miles wants to be closer to you.
He wants to meet you.
At this right he's fallen for you... the Walrider's claws dig deeper into his heart to feed off the feeling.
The issue is... how does he get to you?
If he's patient enough, maybe the Walrider will have an answer.
Maybe the Walrider will guide him to you if he listens to its orders... then he can show you he loves you. His savior.
The Walrider wishes to meet you, too...it just needs to find a way to pass over to your world, eventually.
In the meantime, Miles will wait and fuel his obsession by watching... for now, it will do.
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