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Northeast seasons

Nov 15-Dec 31: Winter (4pm sunset edition)

Jan 1-Feb 28: Icy inhospitable tundra

Mar 1-Mar 14: Winter 2 (5pm sunset edition)

March 15th: Exactly one sunny 56 degree day that makes everyone a little insane and people greet you like "beautiful day! maybe I won't divorce my wife"

Mar 16-Mar 31: Winter 3

Apr 1 - Apr 14: Wet (cold edition)

April 15: Exactly one sunny 65 degree day that makes people say "Maybe I will plant a garden! Maybe I'll hike! Maybe I'll quit my job!"

Apr 16 - Apr 30: Wet (less cold edition?)

May 1 - Jun 15: Beautiful. Gorgeous. What if you lived outside for a month? What if you sold your house and lived in the meadow? What if you started a farm? What if you finally opened that bakery? What if you lie face down in the flowers? What if you lie face down in the flowers forever (brought to you by the I don't have seasonal allergies gang)

Jun 16 - July 2: Well it's pretty humid now but at least it's not Texas yeah? At least it's not Texas. At least we're not Texas. Or Florida. You hear about Florida?

July 3 - Aug 31: Well it's hot and humid. But you hear about Texas? Florida? Florida? My friend in Florida's Chihuahua walked outside and got vaporized in a sun beam. At least it's not Texas. At least it's not Florida.

Sept 1 - Sept 15: Muggy.

Sept 16 - Oct 31: Look at our leaves. Look at our leaves. Look at the leaves. Look at our leaves. Have you seen our leaves? I have a picture of our leaves. This picture is old (2 hours ago) so you should look at the leaves now. Peak foliage is in 4 hours and 37 minutes. You should look outside. You should look at the leaves. You should eat the leaves. You should eat the leaves.

Nov 1 - Nov 14: Oh No It's Coming Back

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William Mason Brown (1828-1898) "Raspberries in a Wooded Landscape" Oil on canvas Located in the Crystal Bridges Museum of American Art, Bentonville, Arkansas

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how my wife and I communicate when we miss each other

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you'll never get away from the sound of the woman that loves you, or something like that

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it’s throcking absolute morton

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At a university interfaith event, I remarked to a friend in front of the Catholic Chaplin- “you know put Christ back in Christmas? Put ass back in Passover.”

He blinked at me, and slowly said - “you know… I’ve never heard this phrase before..”

And I’m now wondering if he thinks this is a widespread sentiment among the Jewish community.

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How does one contract scurvy from eating too many homemade pickles? And how many is too many?

when i first moved out and started cooking for myself i had a very poor diet. i think @lizardho has a picture of my fridge at one point, it was just various kinds of pickled things, and cured meats.

fast forward after like, three or four months of this, and i was at the dentist, getting my teeth cleaned, when the hygenist went ah, babs, your gums are bleeding. u need to floss more.

and i went i floss like, three times a day, and it always bleeds, and im always gentle, and you are lying bastard gum torturers. u can do what u need to, but dont stab my mouth and blame me when it bleeds.

the hygenist took exception to that. we didn't really shout at each other, but it was a tense exchange and i was just much more crabby than normal. eventually he left to get the dentist to sort things out.

cue the dentist coming back. he checked out my gums, gave me a lookover, then said hey. babs. are your joints kind of achey?

and i went yeah, i'm kind of hoping for another growth spurt, i'm 5'11 and it would be nice to finally hit the ol' 6'

and he went yeah, but you're 21, so that's not gonna happen. got any rashes? weird bruises?

and i had some decent bruises, and a weird rash on my leg, and he looked at them and we yeah you are quite vitamin c deficient. thats not easy to do in arizona. how much fresh fruit or vegetables have you had in your diet recently?

and i went does pickled count?

and that was his lightbulb moment. apparently pickling breaks down the vitamin c in things really well. he told me that i should just like, eat one or two raw bell peppers a day for a week and call him if that worked.

it did. my gums stopped bleeding, and my knees stopped hurting at night and my skin just felt smoother and nicer and i got a lot less crabby. no more mouthing off at dental hygenists.

i called him when the week was done, and i was embarrassed that i'd given myself scurvy like it was still the 18th century, and he said naw, not scurvy, but like. noticable deficiency. he said that it was a weird problem, but he'd run into it before - mostly with college students fresh out of the house. people trying to live off peanut butter and ramen for a few months at a time.

i took a multivitamin after that, but i also made an effort to try and eat like a normal human being. i failed occasionally but the effort made me feel a lot better.

my time in cross country gave me this sort of gnostic-feeling about my body. like it was a weak thing that i needed to overcome through will, and not like. me. at least not actually me. i think this was my first big wake up call that no, the body is not my enemy, i am my body, i am a physical object in this world, and if i don't take care of myself i am going to be worse at everything, including moral tasks, like not being a dick to the dental hygenist.

so. yeah. tldr, please don't spend months trying to live off pickles and salami. :/

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today's Wicked milestone:

just got a 2tb external drive because oops I have too many for all of them to fit in one place on a 1tb drive

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this man is the one true ally

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truly no matter how many times I see Wicked, I can never predict it

like

me: ooh, a Laurel Harris and Ginna Claire Mason! that's gonna be gay af!

GC: hell yeah it is, girl ;)

Laurel: actually I'm gonna play it p straight this time. just for funsies. just to see if i can

me: what? 😟

GC: what?! 😭