#but i'm probably gonna kill him off in a few more videos

[draptorronin]

Q u b e y.

This time actually drawn by me (with a bit of editing in photoshop)!

[dannyphantom-zero]

Doctor Danny chapter 4

Ice cold water splashed on Danny's face, soaking his hair. Danny woke up blearily wondering when his roof had started leaking.

He opened his eyes hand almost gagged . He was met with the exact person he wanted to chew apart.

Jason was running across building at top speed. Danny's apartment was a wreck and he was nowhere to be found. Jason had only looked away for a few hours, who knew Danny would be targeted already.

Well there was the News that had displayed him the previous day.

"Wakey wakey hero"

Danny squinted as his vision became clear.

"A clown?"

"I saw your little show and decided to break out of Arkam sooner just for you. It's my turn to put on a show now"

Danny wanted to strangle him right then but there were people around. Well they were just henchmen, if he knocked them out then they would see anything.

More importantly he had a few ideas on how to handle the joker.

"Put on a show, how about I do to you what you have done to countless of my patients" Danny threatened glaring murderously.

"Patience, I'll kill you after I tune in out friends"

Danny rolled his eyes. Back in the cave Batman had received an alert that Joker had broken out of Arkham.

Apparently he had kidnapped a prestigious doctor too.

"Incoming video call" the bat computer alerted.

The screen went black for a second before a smiling joker appeared in front of the camera.

"Hello batsy"

"Joker" batman growled.

"My friend here-"

"Shut the duck up! We are not friends GOD!"

Batman was taken aback.

"I'm going to beat the everloving hell out of you!" Danny shouted.

"He's cranky, I'm going to kill him slowly, break his resolve-"

"NOT BEFORE I BREAK YOUR FACE!"

Joker looked seriously annoyed.

"Let's get started shall we"

Joker picked up a crowbar.

"Remember this batsy, this should be so much fun. I just love reunion's"

Joker smiled before turning away from the camera.

"Joker!" Batman shouted from the other end of the screen.

Joker raised the crowbar and brought it down crushingly hard into Danny leg.

Batman waited for the screaming, but it was silence.

"Oh my bad, ~ow that hurts so bad~" Danny mocked.

He had phased out of his bindings and was now standing off to the left of joker.

"What- how did you get over there?!"

Danny gave Joker a sadistic grin.

"I'm a doctor Joker, I don't kill, but I did promise someone that I would tear off your arms if given the chance" Danny said as he rolled up his sleeves.

Batman was frantically trying to find them before the good doctor did something he regretted.

"Get him!"

Danny smiled and took on the henchmen, knocking them out quickly.

"How in the hell?! Just how weak are those stupid-"

A punch to the face caught off Jokers words.

"Hey joker, buddy. It's time I break you, permanently"

"Wha-" screams of utter agony filled the room.

Jason had found the building joker was holding Danny. He hadn't started to worry until he heard screaming.

Jason ran as fast as he could. The sight he was met with was not what he was expecting. Joker was laying on the ground with his arms bent in ways they were not meant to bend.

"No,no wait, Im sorry for kidnapping you AAAAHHH"

There was a satisfying crunch sound followed by a pop. Danny turned his head sensing another presence.

"Oh hey!"

"Hey?"

Danny had his foot on Jokers back.

"I was just teaching him a lesson" Danny said with a shrug.

"But his arms are still attacked to his body, I thought you said you were gonna rip them off"

"Well I mean, I broke most of his fingers, hell probably need crutches to walk right after this anyway"

"MY LEGS ARE FINE" Joker shouted from the floor.

Danny shoved the crowbar through his leg.

More screams followed.

"Like I was saying, he's gonna need help walking, hey Hood?"

Jason tilted his head, "hm?"

"I'm not going to jail for this right, it's definitely self defense right"

"You'll be fine, I mean, you might wanna get out of here though. The bat daddy is on his way"

Danny nodded glumly.

"I want to make something clear" he said crouching down to the half conscious Joker.

"I'm not proud of what I did today, but I can't stand by and watch you kill or injury any more people. You, will never touch another person again or I will come back for you"

His tone was more menacing than he realized and the Joker was terrified.

"That's the dude that killed me"

Danny whipped his head around.

"What?! He's the one who beat you death with a crowbar?!"

Jason flinched.

"Sorry, I know that not a comfortable subject I shouldn't have brought it up"

Jason shook his head.

"It's not you who should feel sorry right now"

Danny grabbed the crowbar and Jason had to take it from him.

"Your not killing anybody today Doctor. You still have patients waiting on you"

Danny sighed.

"Alright, let's tie him up and get out of here then"

"What?" Jason asked. He wasn't sure why Danny was thinking about him.

"Well I'm not gonna leave you here to face off with Batman"

"Too late, both of you better start talking. Now" an intimidating voice ordered.

Danny half near jumped out of his skin.

"Um hey bat-babe. See, my friend here and I were just passing through and we'll be on our way now. Bye"

Jason grabbed Danny and shit his grapple hook at the nearest window.

Danny was pulled into the air, gliding as Jason swung. They landed on the nearby road and didn't stop running.

They crashed at Jason's place instead of Danny's.

Danny was out of breath by the time they reached Jason's apartment door. Once he was inside he fell the the ground laughing.

"Hahahah, I can't believe you did that!" Danny cried out as he tried to breathe.

Jason took off his helmet.

"Really? Well best believe it because Batman is a hard nut for sure. Your gonna be on his wanted list now"

Danny's laughter was cut short. Jason turned and saw tears.

"Danny? What's wrong?"

"I can't go to jail Jason! I'm too young, I have my career and I'll be targeted for my good looks!" Danny sobbed.

"Your not going to jail" Jason said sitting down in front of his couch next to Danny.

"And if the bat come for you I'll wrestle him alright"

"Mhm"

Jason stared in front of him.

"I don't think Joker will be able to hurt anyone for a long time, you did something amazing Danny. Your amazing you know that"

Silence...

"Danny?" Jason peeked around Danny's shoulder to see Danny's head slumped down.

He smiled to himself, today had been a hectic day especially for a civilian.

Danny twitched in his sleep. Jason picked Danny up carefully and laid him on his bed before turning him in.

Danny woke up the next morning on the floor not sure where he was.

Flashbacks of yesterday popped into his head without permission. Joker, Batman and...Jason!

Danny sat up and saw the mess he had made of Jason's bed. Everything was pulled off the bed, nothing survived Danny's late night wrath. Danny worked quickly remaking the bed with help from his skills earned during his intern days.

He only considered it finished once there were no wrinkles too be found.

"Hah, I need some water" he muttered before making his way around the unfamiliar space. On his way to the kitchen he spotted Jason on the couch.  His arm was thrown above his head and the couch looked entirely too small for the man.

"Pfft"

Jason opened one eye.

"Are you laughing at me?"

"Noo, I just noticed how manly you look today"

Jason sat up.

"Yea alright wise guy"

Danny was about to make a wise crack when his eye caught sight of the clock.

"OH MY GOD!" he shouted horrified.

"I don't report to work yesterday!"

Jason grabbed the panicking man.

"It's ok, I called the hospital and explained that you were in danger. They took a little to convince but I managed to get you the day off"

Danny almost fainted.

"I can't take a day off! What about the patients??"

Jason sat Dany down and kneeled before him.

"Do you not have faith in your fellow doctors?"

"I-I do"

Jason nodded.

"Danny, all you've been doing is looking out for your patients. In order to care for them you also need to be healthy"

"I'm healthy, look at me, I have muscles" Danny said jabbing his arm as if to prove it.

"I see that" Jason said unimpressed.

"But I'm talking about mental health. Take a day and just let someone else take care of you"

Danny scoffed.

"Yea right, like who?"

Jason smirked.

[foone]

The worst part of working at the Dimensional Nexus is that we don't get the regular internet there so you can't just watch your shows on Netflix or whatever. We gotta stick to analog media, since the digital stuff doesn't deal well with the temporal flux (the analog stuff doesn't either, but it's usually just a fuzzy image for a second, while your computer just crashes).

Everyone brings in their favorite media from home on old analog tapes (or laserdiscs. They're analog too! And we've got a couple hardened players on the lounge, so we can watch them).

Anyway while you're on-base (which could be for months or years), all your (video) media consumption ends up being on CRTs and piles of tapes you brought or traded with coworkers. Most people bring in a second suitcase of tapes so they'll have something to watch.

I brought in some letsplayers I stuck on a few VHS tapes (yt2vhs is a great program), and box sets of Star Trek: TNG and DS9.

About a month in, the trades really open up, as everyone has watched their own tapes and wants more. I got a good deal on a laserdisc of the Soviet version of... Well, nevermind. But let me just say, in my defense, the author of the books never went off the deep in in that universe, and the Soviet version wasn't made with her cooperation, anyway. I know that's sometimes a little difficult for people from the 91-verse to believe, but that's not the author's reputation in the rest of the Nexus.

Anyway I traded my TNG episodes for VOY. I've seen TNG a dozen times, so I figured it was time to go back over VOY.

It seemed to be pretty similar to what I remembered (other than them killing off Seska of all people at the beginning of S3? Who kills off your series's main villain?!) but at the end of S3 I hit the big divergence between our universes:

Seven. They introduced him early on in Scorpion, part 1, earlier than I remember.

The storyline goes mostly the same, with just a little less 7/Janeway romantic tension (do they even get together in this version? I'm gonna have to wait until season 5 to find out!)

Harry Kim lives in this version of Scorpion, too. I'm not sure why that is, they were clearly setting him up to die? Probably some executive meddling or something. I don't have access to Trekpedia (especially in that universe!) to check.

But yeah. This is one of the universes that got the twinky Seven instead of the catsuit-girl version (Not that this version wears any fewer catsuits). They got 9 seasons instead of the usual 5, so I'm excited to see if those extra ones are any good. When I was picking up the tapes I was surprised how many there were, and Josh told me in his universe they get home in season 6 and the remaining 3 seasons are a sort of spin-off/reboot done when Orbita took over from UPN.

Can't wait to see how that goes. More Star Treks need a post-script season (or three) made in the USSR!

Anyway I'm already looking forward to finishing this because I've already gotten a lead on a copy of TNG where Yaphet Kotto said Yes to the Picard role (sadly that version doesn't have the quintessential Jeffrey Combs as Riker, but I hear some people swear by the Gregg Marx Riker).

Still looking for any copies of the Kim Miyori-as-Data version of TNG. That one wasn't as popular (not it's vault! They had the US Doctor Who and both the Star Wars shows to go up against) so it's less likely to be brought in, but I'm always checking video libraries whenever I'm in that universe. Someday I'll find it. I found that fucking CED of the Walken A New Hope, I'll get the girl!Data TNG one of these days!

[wishful-thinking64]

One Hell of an Unpopular Opinion #03

Characters like Barbie Wire, Chaz, Crimson, Octavia, and Stella only exist as plot devices to garner sympathy for other characters. _______ I knew fully well that Chaz and Crimson were going to merely be plot devices for Moxxie the more I watched Exes & Oohs. And sure enough, Chaz was killed at the end of that very episode and Crimson is yet another wacky cartoon villain that the narrative expects for you to take seriously. Both of these characters existed so that the audience could gain sympathy (or at least pity) for Moxxie being raised in a Mafia family and having been abused as a child along with being betrayed by his ex-boyfriend (who also happened to be Millie's ex-boyfriend for some reason.) Other than Moxxie's Mafia family upbringing making zero sense the more you think about it, Viv has basically done this exact backstory before in the form of Angel Dust (with the whole mobster backstory who was also abused by his father.) However, the Exes & Oohs episode and title actually stems from one of the HH mockup episodes that was originally about Charlie and Vaggie coming across Charlie's ex, Seviathan (yes, that's what Viv named him), and his sister, Helsa, while they were at a dinner party.

Now, do I think Chaz and Crimson could've had the potential to be good characters? In all honesty, no. Especially not Chaz. The guy is a harmful stereotype of pansexual people and how, "They'll sleep with anyone," which no, they won't. I'm not pansexual myself but that thought process is as gross as it is fucking stupid. The only person who I've seen even re-writing Chaz has been Loves Art23 (I mainly know her for YouTube videos being critical on Hazbin Hotel + Helluva Boss along with other shows like the disaster known as High Guardian Spice) and I think she's done a fairly good job so kudos to her for making him work. Personally, though I'm scrapping him as that gives me one less character to worry about when re-writing HB. Crimson would have to be heavily and I mean HEAVILY reworked/re-written in order for him to make any actual sense. That and I'm tired of every character having some variation of the same daddy issues in the Hellaverse. Which means he's also gonna get axed from me. Moving onto the ladies I mentioned, let's start off with Barbie Wire.

Having been foreshadowed since the pilot of I.M.P. (as seen when Tilla was still Barb's and Blitzo's older sister rather than their mother) Barbie Wire was an anticipated character by fans for years! And then her actual appearance finally happened in Unhappy Campers, an episode hated by practically everyone who saw it, and no one really cared about her showing up, other than the fact that the writers thought that having her seduce a BARELY legal adult would make for a good joke, when in reality, it only made everybody uncomfortable and several people dislike Barbie because of it. Sure, near the end of the episode she had that "emotional" scene with Blitzo that wants the viewers to feel bad for him and Barbie before she left but in the long run it didn't matter as fans barely even talk about it because of how uneventful it truly was. So, with that out of the way, would I keep Barbie Wire around for a rewrite of HB? To that I say, yes! There are several paths Barbie Wire's overall character could go in. If you're mainly sticking to canon, then what you have to work with is a former circus performer who lost her mother in a fire caused by her twin brother that left his own best friend to rot and be disabled for the rest of his life. It's very likely that this very fire, caused her to be out of a job and probably even homeless for a bit which could explain why she ended up becoming both a drug attic and a drug dealer. Homelessness is one of the few things that nobody wants to experience. It causes people to be filled with a sense of overwhelming loneliness and desperation as many of them either believe that there's nothing they can do or they do anything and everything that they can to get out of it even if that means resorting to crime. If you wanted to have her be loosely based on canon instead, you could make it to where she never learned about who started the fire and actually stuck with Blitzo well into adulthood. Have her become one of the members of I.M.P. and later down the line have her learn through someone like Fizz or maybe Cash (her and Blitzo's father) what actually went down that day. Have her be rightfully pissed off at Blitzo for screwing over multiple people along with being the one responsible for killing their mom. Anyway, let's proceed onto Stella and her daughter Octavia.

As much as the narrative wants me to hate Stella with a burning passion cause she hurts Stolas, I can't do it for multiple reasons but I'll list my top three. #01.) Stella's just as (if not even more so) stuck in this arranged loveless marriage as Stolas is. #02.) If the man I had no choice in marrying not only cheated on me with a man from one of the lowest classes in all of Hell but IN OUR OWN HOME & SHARED BEDROOM NO LESS? OH, FUCK NO!

#03.) This woman had to spend 9 months having to nourish and care for a baby inside her stomach that she had with a man that didn't even want to sleep with her. On top of that, she had to have become pregnant with Octavia when she was a young adult since current day Stolas and Stella are only in their mid 30s. I need you to let that information sink in.

In short, I can't hate Stella for loathing Viv's pathetic self insert bird twink with every fiber of her being.

Having said that, would I have Stella in my HB rewrite? Well, considering that I plan on keeping the war that happened in the bible that caused Lucifer and several angels to fall from grace, one of which being Stolas. Kind of. Allow me to elaborate, I would keep Stella as Octavia's mother but I wouldn't have her marry Stolas. I'd have her be a surrogate mother that way Stolas still gets an heir and Octavia could still exist. Speaking of Octavia...

We all know that she exists to make Stolas look like a better person as several stans of this show love to say how much of a good dad Stolas is when he isn't. He neglects Octavia frequently in favor of Blitzo and only pays attention to her when she's gone although EVEN THAT doesn't last long as shown in Seeing Stars where HE KNEW Octavia was missing on Earth but rather than ACTIVELY look for his daughter, what does he do? HE SITS THROUGH A STUPID LIVE COMEDY SHOW CAUSE BLITZO IS PERFORMING! HE COMPLETELY SIDELINES HIS OWN DAUGHTER IN FAVOR OF A LIVE COMEDY SHOW!

God, Octavia deserves so much better than to have a dad like him. I'm keeping Octavia for my HB rewrite so that this poor girl not only realizes how much of a bastard her dad is but eventually gets the found family she deserves. I don't plan for it to be through I.M.P. though. In closing, the characters of this show deserve to be better developed but especially the women in them.

_______

That was a long one to get through cause it's been on my mind for a while. Thank you all for reading through it and bye for now everybody!

[rain0tes]

No words can express how much it is doing HEHEUSVJSGSJZBWKUE to me, thank you for writing this, I shall take it and bite it

Can I request on how the other character staying in the hotel feel about the reader?

Of course you can, nonnie! I'm so glad people like hacker!reader so much 😭

How the other residents at the Hazbin Hotel feel about hacker!reader

Angel dust and you would not get along at first. His hypersexual nature puts you off, which he teases you for.

"what? can't handle a bit of teasing, sweet cheeks?"

"stay six feet away from me."

Eventually, when he does tone it down, he finds that he enjoys your company quite a bit. You're pretty down to earth, and probably the sanest resident in the hotel.

That doesn't make your conversations any less weird.

"so basically you can use 'ussy' as a suffix for anything that has a hole."

"So, like, spidussy?"

Collective groan from everyone else while you cackle uncontrollably.

Teaching sinners gen Z lingo aside, you two would get up to mischief very often (much to everyone else's annoyance). The whole "replacing every porno video with a rick roll" was actually his idea. Petty revenge!

Husk is mostly indifferent about you, up until he realizes that Alastor is interested in you in one way or another. He tries to warn you not to have anything to do with him. He would know. But then again you've never been one to be told what you can or can't do.

Annoyed when you make a deal with Alastor regardless of his warnings, but at least you didn't give up your soul(?)

You two get pretty close afterwards. Something about looking out for you since you're so impulsive.

He's the one who helps you adjust to hell, telling you about things you need to know.

Learns very quickly that once you've put your mind to something, there's no persuading you out of it.

"Husk! Let's go eat at that fancy restaurant, my treat."

"It takes months to get a reservation to that place. And neither of us can pay for it."

"I bumped our reservation for tonight. Besiiiiides, I don't think the Vee's would mind if I take a couple hundred dollars off of their account."

You're gonna get yourself killed one of these days.

He's gotta make sure to prevent it.

Vaggie does not appreciate you messing with the V's.

You try to assure her that they wouldn't find out, but she's still skeptic.

Point taken, you just hide what you're doing from her as much as you can.

She wonders if you really did stop but has a nagging feeling that you're just doing it behind closed doors instead of doing it in the hotels lobby.

"You're endangering everyone else in the hotel!"

"They're not smart enough to find out. Did you know that they have surveillance around the hotel? I can turn all of that off."

Well, so far, they really haven't found out.

But the moment you endanger anyone in the hotel, you're out.

Charlie was ecstatic the first time you came to the hotel after it had just been rebuilt. After a while of staying there, that excitement dies down as she realizes how much of a handful you are.

Still, she's glad to have you around. No one said that redeeming souls was an easy task.

Realizes way too late that you're not really interested in redemption.

Like a few months in way too late.

But at least they have a new technician? You're pretty adept with anything that works on electricity and the help is really appreciated. Especially now that they're confident they won't be spied on while you're around.

Also worried about you constantly messing with the V's, but she's more worried about your safety.

But her dad seems particularly fond over you, and Alastor said he'd make sure you won't get killed. You should be fine, right?

(masterlist)

[creative-clawmarks]

So I wanna talk paralytics and paralysis in regards to Alex's venom (bc I like going on random science deep dives) SO- as I understand it- there are a few different types of paralytics which affect different bodily functions via different methods, but when most people think of temporary paralysis, they think of neuromuscular paralysis, which is what doctors use during surgeries, and some species of jellyfish and snake use to be absolutely terrifying.

Neuromuscular agents won't knock a person out or prevent pain, they just prevent movement. The problem here is that the diaphragm is a skeletal muscle and is affected by neuromuscular paralysis, meaning that without a ventilator or another breathing apparatus, suffocation is practically guaranteed. Really this applies to all neuromuscular agents/neurotoxins.

Here's the interesting thing I found however- Tick Paralysis, which doesn't always affect breathing. Usually starts out as acute ataxia (muscle weakness) and can progress to muscular paralysis if the tick isn't removed. While tick paralysis is also caused by a neurotoxin, my guess is that because ticks are so small the venom isn't particularly potent, and they don't produce a ton of it.

For Alex's venom to not outright kill via asphyxiation, the potency would probably have to be low enough to allow for diaphragm movement (though probably still weakened) but high enough to trap prey, which is a hell of a needle to thread. That, or it's a neurotoxin that specifically avoids effecting the diaphragm, which doesn't really exist as far as I know (then again, vampires don't either)

TL:DR - Neurotoxins are scary as hell and it's likely that someone envenomed by Alex would experience weakened breathing, if not outright suffocation.

(there's a 2008 movie called The Burrowers where the monsters use a venom that effectively causes Locked-in syndrome, but the science is kinda iffy. Roanoke Gaming as a video on it)

You've given me the perfect opportunity to go into depth on this.

So there's this trope I see in vampire stories where something about the vampire's bite makes it so their victims don't struggle. Usually this is due to supernatural influence, a charm or compulsion that makes the bite pleasant instead of painful.

But I wanted the bite to be painful, and more than that I wanted just the idea of being bitten to be terrifying. So I though, what is something naturally occurring that makes it so that something can't move but can still feel pain?

Why, paralytic venom of course!

(I then proceeded to do zero research lol.)

With this new information I can confidently say that, yes, Alex's venom is a neuromuscular paralytic. It makes it so that his prey cannot escape but leaves them conscious and able to feel pain. It does not, however, bring a risk of asphyxiation, because if Alex is going to kill someone I want it to be on purpose. I suppose that means his venom doesn't target the respiratory system, which considering we're talking about fictional monsters I'm gonna say we can suspend our disbelief here.

Humans stand basically no chance against something like that, but other monsters could fight if off much faster due to their regenerative abilities. That's how Tim survived Entry 56/57, Alex was banking on his venom to keep Tim down but instead he shook it off and managed to flee. He would've gotten away if it weren't for the Operator.

Ok, that should be everything...

"But wait!" I hear you cry, "If Alex's venom is super scary and not at all pleasant, then why does Jay like getting bitten by him?"

Because Jay is a freak. Next question.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

KO-FI

[ozzy-boy]

Hii! Volks, Scale and Cole's reaction (separately) if someone calls their s/o ugly?

Volks:

-Volks doesn't do social media. He doesn't have any and he doesn't look at it either.

-He finds the whole thing kind of ridiculous anyway- why would you care what strangers online have to say? You show him cute videos of dogs sometimes though, so he figures it can't all be bad.

-When Volks notices that you're a little downtrodden, he doesn't suspect that social media would be the cause.

-You brush him off and say that it's stupid when he asks what's wrong, which immediately rubs him the wrong way.

-He's your boyfriend- he doesn't care if it's stupid, if something is bothering you, he wants to know.

-If you keep trying to avoid it he'll end up putting his forehead against yours and staring into your eyes until you say it.

-You eventually give in and admit that someone called you ugly under one of the new pictures you posted.

-Normally Volks would probably agree that it's stupid to be upset over a stranger's opinion, but that kind of thing doesn't bother him. You're more sensitive than he is though. (unbothered king)

-He assures you it isn't true and is extra sweet for a while to make you feel better. He also goes on your phone later and deletes any comments that aren't compliments (even if it takes him a while to figure out how bc he's an old man with technology 💀)

Scale:

-Scale isn't huge on social media either, but he makes accounts so he can like your posts and so you can send him things.

-Honestly if he didn't have the whole 'assassin secret identity' thing going on, he'd probably post stuff about his workout routine. He's fine just sending those videos to you, though ;)

-He likes to go to your insta and look at your pictures when he's having a rough day with training, just as a little pick-me-up.

-Though, today he notices a comment under your most recent post.

-Immediately confused. ("Huh?")

-Refreshing the page constantly, as if expecting it to be a mistake. ("Who?")

-You? Ugly??? ("What?????")

-Genuinely dumbfounded. He's never heard something so ridiculous in his life.

-You're equally confused a few hours later when you log on and see your boyfriend getting in an online slapfight with a random person under your post.

-It's very endearing that Scale is so willing to go to bat and defend you but you're gonna have to give him a lesson in online safety and teach him how to block people that make him angry and move on -_-

Cole:

-Cole is your number 1 fan he has all your accounts on notification. He is your first like on every post.

-He kind of hates that your pictures are online for anyone to see but he deals with it. He has his own collection of pictures to admire but he often refreshes your pages to see what you're up to.

-While you're out together one day you decide to take a quick photo and post it since you're feeling cute.

-It's not until a while later that Cole watches you check your phone, only for a sad look to pass over your features. He quickly investigates, and finds a bubbling anger rising in his chest when he finds that someone's insulted you.

-'I have to kill this guy right fucking now-'

-'No, no, calm down Cole. You need to keep your cool in front of Marshmallow.'

-'Wait a second, they look sad. I'm going to kill-'

-Cole does a few deep breathing exercises, gets his head on straight and repeatedly tells himself that he can't run off to track down an internet stranger while you're sad.

-"My darling, have I told you how wonderful you look today...?"

-He spends the next several hours spoiling and complimenting as much as you'll allow.

-After all, you need no one else but him.

[steddieas-shegoes]

love doesn't wait

for @corrodedcoffinfest prompt 'this one's for you'

rated m | 685 words | cw: implied/referenced sex | tags: famous corroded coffin, side steddie, jeff's love story, love confessions

💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓💓

Jeff didn't really think much about finding love, his focus too honed in on becoming a rockstar for most of his childhood and young adulthood. He hooked up, sure, but it was rare, and never lasted more than one night.

Love was for later, after he had hit singles and Grammy awards and music videos.

But love doesn't wait, and it certainly doesn't come when you plan for it.

Amy came out of nowhere.

She was front row at a show, and Jeff swears the spotlight stopped right on her. Eddie jokes that it was the angels pointing her out just for Jeff.

He managed to get security to find her right after the show, invited her backstage, and they were barely apart ever since.

She was on summer break from college, so she had nothing but time for him for two months.

It was fast, it was a little stupid, and it made him realize that being a rockstar wasn't everything he wanted.

On the last night that Amy would be with him, she stood backstage with Steve and Sam, watching with a fond smile as they performed.

"It's been great being so close to home, Indy!" Jeff yelled into the mic. "If it's okay with you, we're gonna take it slow for the next song. I've got a special someone here with me tonight. She's heading back home tomorrow and I'm gonna miss her pretty bad. This one's for you, love."

Jeff wasn't a big fan of playing acoustically, reserved their slow songs for Eddie's serenading of Steve most nights. But this was his way of saying what he'd already wanted to say for a while, and the guys had supported him.

"You get used to it," Steve nudged Amy's arm towards the end of the song, smiling at her as she wiped tears from her cheeks. "Kinda. Don't know if it's possible to ever get used to being serenaded in an arena full of 15,000 people."

"Yeah. This is a little crazy." She laughed when Jeff finished the song and threw a wink her way. "I don't wanna go back."

Steve looked over at her, curious, searching for any sign of her lying. When he didn't find any, he smiled. "Then don't. No one said you have to go to school right now. Life happens out of order sometimes."

Amy couldn't take her eyes off of Jeff as she nodded. "My parents will kill me."

"I've got plenty of experience with murderous parents." Steve placed his hand on her shoulder, squeezing once. "What you've got here is worth more than their approval."

He walked away, probably to get snacks for the guys ready in the room backstage. They only had a couple more songs before they'd be done for the night.

Amy watched Jeff finish up.

She knew what she wanted. She knew it would be hard to do.

She knew it was worth it.

****

"I'm gonna stay," she whispered to him that night in bed, still coming down from the high of the show and the two orgasms he'd wrung from her so easily. "Can I?"

Jeff's arms tightened around her. "What about school?"

"I can go back in a few years. I don't wanna miss this with you."

"Won't your parents be mad?" He asked, tilting her face up by her chin to smile down at her.

"Yeah. But they aren't the ones who have to live my life. I love you and I wanna be with you."

"You love me?"

She slapped his chest, laughing. "Of course I do! You just sang a song for me in front of a huge crowd after two months of holding my hand everywhere we go."

"Well, when you put it like that..." Jeff rolled over until he was hovering over her, smiling down at the love of his life. "I think it's pretty clear I love you too."

"Maybe you could show me one more time tonight?" She kissed his neck, smiling against his skin as he groaned.

"You're lucky you're so hot."

"No, you're lucky I'm so hot."

[petrssecrethideout]

"Bro, do you wanna hear about something crazy?"

"I mean sure, go ahead,"

"Alright, so I was just relaxing, scrolling TikTok,"

"Already a bad idea."

"I know, I got beef with that fuckin' algorithm let me tell you. I follow a couple of bodybuilders, post a couple of gym vids and suddenly my For you page is filled with the biggest assholes alive. Anyway, I'm scrolling, and I see this guy, he's doing that whole 'alpha top dog' thing even though he's not that big."

"Okay wait pause, how big is not that big?"

"I don't know, I have more muscle in my arms than he has in his whole body, real gym influencer type."

"Alright, for anyone listening to the pod at home, I should probably just say that this guy could be anywhere from 150-300 pounds from Dale's description of him, okay? He's not good at judging what normal guys look like anymore."

"Yeah, okay, you got me. Anyway, this guy keeps going on about his great advice, so I stick around to hear it. You wanna know what he said? 'Stop Cumming, its killing your natural testosterone' What kind of bullshit is that!?"

"I mean that is a big part of the current fitness world, these guys will say anything to get more followers, and a lot of their followers are so desperate for progress that they'll take whatever advice they're given."

"It's a shame, because he's also wrong! I tried that whole 'No Nut Whatever' and its been the only time in these last 5 years that I've plateaued."

"... Really?"

"Yeah! If I'm not cranking a load out every day I can kiss any potential gains goodbye."

"Wait,"

"Like after my workouts, when I got a huge pump going, I just have to crank one out, like what good workout would it be if I didn't"

"Dale c'mon,"

"And its not like I can just hit up a guy on Grindr and go to town every time I need to, there aren't enough guys on Grindr for that."

"Uggggh dude, we are never getting a sponsor with you talking like this."

"What, so all the straight alpha dudebros can talk about semen retnetion and get a ton of followers, but I get censored for talking about jacking off and getting tons of ass?"

"Yeah, we will."

"Well then, listeners, go subscribe to the patreon so that I can talk about my actual tips for growing, and so that you can help Mark get bigger. I'm telling you, I'm gonna make this boy huge with your help. Audio listeners make sure to check the videos so you can see this boy get huge. Now bro, help me out here. You don't want those Tiktok gymfluencers to win do you? How often are you jerkin off?"

"Oh god I can't believe I'm answering this... A couple of times a week maybe?"

"A week? That's fucking crazy. My average is like 4-5 times a day. More if I'm really feeling horny. If I'm being honest I jerked off a few weeks ago on the pod, like I forgot to before I came here. One of the comments mentioned something about my grunting that episode."

"Jesus christ dude, how do you even manage that?"

"Well, you gotta work up to it. I couldn't do that starting out, but once I started growing I was so horny I had to do something about it. I think that's what these guys don't get. You gotta get those balls working, give them a reason to keep making that sweet testosterone. How are you supposed to do that if you aren't jacking it? Honestly dude, I feel like I gotta prove these guys wrong now."

"What, you're gonna be a cum warrior?"

"Hell yeah man, I'm gonna be fighting the war on jerking it, on the side of jerking it!"

[stillfrownyclownlol]

Oh nooooo somebody stole my Aidlyn/Ashden headcanons so now I have to write more ... ✨️

(SORRY IM SPAMMING THE TAG 😭😭😭)

Some of these are based on my dad because he has bpd and he really reminds me of Aiden.

-His sense of humor is so broken like. Probably makes "that's what she said" and "your mom" jokes. Ash thinks he is the unfunniest person alive 🤡 and she STILL laughs at him (but never when he's trying to be funny). I think he'd be on Vine a lot lmao. He would laugh at that video of the bread slice falling over no cap.

-Aiden Clark, Professional Doomscroller. Maybe an itty bitty bit addicted to social media cuz "omg easy dopamine hit" even if he doesn't post a lot. Would prolly be chronically on TikTok if he was a teen today 🤡 Ash WILL steal his phone and hide it so they can "do something productive" (which alternates between her trying to teach him basic life skills to him falling out of a tree because they went outside for five minutes)

-her parents also gave him a truly awful shovel talk. He came out of it, kneeled in front of her, and said if he broke her heart to kill him before her parents did 💖 Tyler and him bond about their "scary in laws", although he has a better relationship with Mike and Emma than Tyler does with Mary and James 🤡

-convinced her to go to prom because "free food" and managed to wrangle out a slow-dance from her. He already likes dancing, SHE likes dancing...he wants to dance together ^_^

-She really likes his normal smile, when he's not forcing it. He takes good care of his teeth, so he's got a real bright smile :)

-Aiden tried to teach her how to skateboard a few times. She can...stand on it without falling off and roll around, but no tricks lol. Ash still thinks it was just an excuse for him to grab her hands or waist while she was balancing.

-Some problems in the relationship: they are not very good at communicating how they feel, so there's a lot of misunderstandings between them unless the gang intervenes haha ":D Sometimes Ash feels very suffocated by him and she really dislikes his apathy towards himself, and Aiden sometimes feels like Ash doesn't care about him nearly as much as he cares about her.

-his depressive episodes alternate between "I'm just gonna lie here and hope I die" to "actively trying to self destruct", sometimes he might go on a binge (overdosing on his meds, and when he's older he might sometimes drink too much or go on really dangerous joy rides, he's an awful driver), they really freak Ash out :( Recovery is a very long road with no end destination. She's trying to get better at reassuring him and he's trying to...just get better.

-both of them suck at remembering their anniversary 🤡 Aiden is a littleeeee bit better

-They have a knife collection they share ❤️

-he has her as "love of my life 💖✨️😍" on his phone contacts and has a special ringtone for her and everything. Absolutely not embarrassed about it, Ash...definitely is 💀 (she has him as "Aiden")

-sends her really bad poetry he wrote for her because writing his feelings down by himself is easier than saying it in the moment. Ash keeps all of them in a shoebox in her closet.

-she's not really good with touching and stuff but she feels better touching him, like a good stim. Really likes holding his face (no eye contact). Also enjoys him holding her hand.

-Secretly a little insecure about how she looks. She has never really thought about it before because she never cared about it, but now, in a relationship, she's kinda self conscious about him perceiving (read: constantly staring) her. She's very short and thin (even with muscles from ballet and training) and feels like a "late bloomer." Aiden thinks she's the closest thing to physical perfection that exists and will tell her this constantly ^_^

-She actually likes how he smells (grâce à: his really expensive soap lmao) but she would die before telling him lol

-The first time she kissed him her brain kinda shut off and she just squished their faces together while puffing her cheeks up. He bust out laughing and completely murdered the mood 💀 They'll figure it out...eventually

[faketrex]

More cakegate bodyswap? More cakegate bodyswap. Part 3, in which our heroes are remarkably ill-suited to subterfuge.

To be continued.

...

SHARING A SLICE... part 3

RWRB, rated T, 650 words (this part).

(click here for part 1) (part 2)

...

As much as Alex hates agreeing with Henry about anything, they see eye-to-eye on this: they can't tell anyone. No sisters, no best friends, no Secret Service or PPOs. This secret is theirs and only theirs.

Alex had never imagined he would share any secrets with Henry, let alone one that could cause an international incident.

Well... a second international incident. The caketastrophe probably already had to count as one.

Keeping the secret makes Alex's video call with Zahra complicated.

“—you're going to sit your butt in the residence, go to class, and not get papped until we do damage control.”

Henry-as-Alex makes a pissy face. Off-screen, silent and out of range of the phone's camera, Alex kicks him. “Assuredly, by all means,” Henry stammers.

Alex scribbles in his notebook and turns it around, holding it in Henry's line of sight and shaking it to get his attention. TALK LIKE A HUMAN. Henry’s frown deepens.

“If anyone asks about the prince, you stick to ‘no comment,’ is that clear?”

BE A HUMAN YOU DUMBASS. Alex taps the paper for emphasis.

“Alex. Is that perfectly clear?”

“Bloody crystal,” Henry mutters.

Exasperated, Alex throws up his hands. Never mind his mom, Zahra’s gonna kill him, which means she'll kill Henry since he’s still in Alex's body.

ISN'T YOUR DAD AN ACTOR?? he scrawls. WHERE DID THOSE GENES GO??? When Alex turns the notebook around again and Henry reads it, he recoils as if Alex had slapped him, mouth dropping open.

“You have no—” Henry starts, but Zahra doesn't let him finish his thought.

“What the hell, Alex, are you listening to me?”

Subterfuge is clearly a lost cause where Henry is concerned. Alex has to intervene. He crosses to sit next to Henry, deliberately coming into frame on-screen.

“Oh, your royal highness—”

“Please,” Alex says, “call me Henry. I'm sorry to interrupt, but I wanted to inform you of the plan.”

“The plan,” Zahra repeats slowly.

“Yes, it hasn’t been fully vetted by my staff—” Henry makes a noise and Alex pinches his thigh to shut him up, “—but hopefully you can help expedite things from your end.”

“I can certainly try. God knows your country loves protocol.”

“In the interest of resolving this as soon as f— as soon as feasible,” Alex clears his throat, “we've agreed Alex should remain in London for a few days. We’ll put on a horse and pony show for the press to demonstrate there are no hard feelings.”

It's Henry's turn to step on Alex's foot, but Alex ignores him. They hadn't had time to discuss a plan before Zahra had called. Piloting Henry's body around the White House wouldn't exactly go unnoticed — and Henry taking Alex's body home while Alex stays in England and pretends to be a prince sounds like a nightmare.

Henry had been right earlier: Alex can't leave yet.

“Alex,” Zahra is saying, “I can take this up the ladder, but you need to promise you'll hold up your end of the bargain.”

“What—” Henry begins.

“It's a decent plan, but you need to sell it.”

“I—”

“You need to act like the sun shines out of his dick, do you hear me?”

Henry's mouth snaps shut.

“I'm sure he'll excel,” Alex jumps in. “Who wouldn't be thrilled to have the company of a prince?”

Zahra snorts. “Alex?”

Alex can see Henry’s face pinching again, but he nods. “It's the best plan we have.”

That bar is really low; it's the only plan they have.

“I'll be in touch tomorrow,” Zahra says. “And Alex?”

“Yes?”

“No funny business.”

“Of course not,” Alex-as-Henry protests, syrupy-sweet. “I assure you, my family takes foreign diplomacy very seriously. I even drove an American car, once.”

The screen has hardly gone dark before Henry smacks him with a decorative pillow. Alex doesn't regret it.

...

(Part 4)

[autisticshadowthehedgehog]

Knuckles Arc Anon here for the third and final time, there's a few lore decisions that I just remembered that confuse me.

1.Pachamac's character being completely different. I'm aware Sonic and friends are slightly different than their game versions but there's still the essence of them. Like Sonic still keeps his basic core concept of being a representation of the average teen/kid for example and extreme oversimplication. But Pachamac, I have no problems with Knuckles not being related to him or Pachamac not being from thousands of years in the past. My issue is him being a completely different character especially with the context of movie 2.

Like in the games Pachamac is a bloodthirsty asshole who's desire for power led to the destruction of his empire, unleashing an ancient god, and eventually the extinction of all Echidna. Which knowing the lore in movie 2 would be perfect and easy to adapt (u could ignore Chaos for now)

Why is he chill? It's not even hinted at that he died with regrets and wished he made the right decisions in life to explain this massive change in personality. Personally my theory was while watching is that Pachamac was slowly going to be revealed as being a terrible person who would try to force Knuckles to stick in his warrior mindset.

2. Knuckles who was probably a child or preteen being able to kill or seal Iblis... I'm sorry what? Unless Solaris being split apart just instantly lowered the power levels even more in the movieverse this completely fucks with the power scaling. And normally I don't care about this but this is beyond suspension of disbelief. Like yeah the Echidna tribe warred with the owls since they got the Master Emerald but Knuckles didn't even have the Emerald or all the necessary combat training at like 6? Also Knuckles didn't even use his fire powers in Movie 2 but I think we are left to assume it was part of his quest to get the Master Emerald but we are shown he didn't eve need it.

3. Knuckles was gone at minimum for a few days and Maddie calls him her kid. Why is she not blowing up Wade's phone looking for her kid? Set up suggests him being grounded would come back around but guess not?

i dont think i got ur second ask but yeah. I DO feel like SOMETHING's being set up with Pachacamac, considering they made him specifically the bitch who shot Longclaw in the 2020 movie. I don't think they completely forgot his personality but they were setting something off that either didn't get paid off or hasn't been paid off yet.

Another thing I would have really liked from this series would've been more acknowledgement that Knuckles is a child. He's about 15 when this series takes place. He shouldn't be thinking like this, Sonic's right he should be playing video games and reading comic books. Once again I feel like the first ep was setting that shit up and then they just. Forgot.

but anyway that's enough negativity lmao i just woke up with some awful cramps so im gonna watch the second movie til i pass out

[lifesteal-headcanons]

I'm gonna put the glitch in glitch duo right now and rant about them and how their glitches work because I am so normal about them (lie)

Okay, so I barely got into Lifesteal like. Late last year because of Squiddo joining and I lowkey got really hyped for it and seeing Ash and Squiddo together I was like.. Woah.. New fav duo alert.. And then found that there was no fancontent and had to make it myself so.

Anywho! Ashswag, as we already know, has that lil.. Thing over his left eye (?) That a lot of us (me) has interpreted as like. Glitching. So to start us off, I believe that glitching can stem from messing with your own player code/others player code/server codes/using mods with like. Virus' or something idk im not that smart. And from the Ashswag videos I've watched we can kind of tell where Ash fits in there by like. Fucking with how servers work and therefore fucking up his own code.

Squiddo's code is glitched because.. Have you watched Squiddo's videos? Naw but fr, she's constantly putting the most cancer inducing mods on her game, playing mods that can definitely fry their pc, playing minecraft on a USB DRIVE?? Which would DELETE chunks to MAKE MORE OF ITSELF so like. You can see where I'm going with this. So obviously, their code gets fucked up and the more they do these mods and plug ins and - whatever the hell, the more their code because intangible and unable to be fixed.

So, with that, I'm gonna go ahead and explain how I think their glitching works and how it affects their body/like.. Everything else.

Ashswag's glitches, as we can see, are more visible to the eye. Literally over his damn eye. I'm gonna go ahead and assume that gives him some partial blindness in his left eye. Also, from some fics that ive read ive seen people give him like, back problems and chronic pain that he probably had before but the glitches DEFINITELY don't help at all and instead make the pain way worse than it already is so. Yay!

While Ash's are more physical, I feel like Squiddo's are more like. Mental? If you catch my drift? While Ash is stumbling down into a heap of pain on the floor because his back is killing him, Squiddo is standing in the hallway staring at him wondering why the guy from the one house smp is crumbling on the floor in front of them on a server they swore they were not on a few weeks ago.

So yeah. Memory loss Squiddo. Also inspired from a fic that I do know! I'll link the fics I got inspired from at the end because they are genuinely such good reads and great ideas.

But I decided that memory loss best fit Squiddo, because tbh they are pretty forgetful. And I take their goofy hijinks and shenanigans as just. Squiddo having to recollection of anything and just trying to do something (which she's probably done before) to job their memory but oh well. I feel as if the memory loss is more of a living in the farlands thing rather than glitched out fucked-up code inducing thing, but whatever. The only time we see glitched out Squiddo is on thumbnails! So I feel like whenever Squiddo joins a server or world that's previously glitched or like. They're already pretty glitched, it really takes its toll and fucks up the whole thing and makes it a memory loss disaster for Squiddo.

And because of Squiddo's horrible memory, they can never recollect and find out what the hell happened to the world to make it this glitched out when in reality she's the reason the world is so glitched.

Except when joining servers! Surprisingly, they don't experience those things when joining servers while when joining worlds the world would become discombobulated and delete itself just after a few hours. Funsies! Which they realize when they join the one house smp just to explore it and then they find ASHSWAG!! And then realizes that HE'S GLITCHED TOO!! YAYY!!! And then they absolutely BOMBARDDDD him with questioned like "why do my worlds always delete themselves?", "what causes someone to have a glitched code?" And "how are servers able to not glitch out?" Etc etc which Ashswag answers and then BOOM! FRIENDSHIP!!!

Basically the only reason servers are able to work for them is because theres like.. This other thing cody whatever that prevents it to idk im not smart. This is not compliant with my past fics written about this stuff but oh wellsies.

Another thing I have made up is 'glitch fever' where basically they just get sick because of their fucked up code and glitches. Yeah. Also based off a fic I read where being around Ashswag too much can make you sick and stuff. I feel like their are certain people who are immune to it like Reddoons (purely because of Swagdoons and nothing else) and Squiddo (because they also glitch tf out and Swagsquid/silly).

Another thing I've like. Headcanoned (because this is all just me reading too much into things and making too many headcanons about) is that their glitches also like.. Made their body tempature irregular. This is so random but it was just something I thought of and then I wrote a fic about it. Like, Ash is constantly fucking cold and on a hot ass texas summer day he'll feel a little warm. Same for Squiddo just vice versa. I love them. The sillies. I want to put them in a terrarium and study them.

That's.. All I have I'm pretty sure. Hello I am Swagsquid the #1 Glitch Duo Writer/Enthusiast and the #1 Swagsquid Shipper (the ONLY Swagsquid shipper..) and thank you for listening to my ted talk.

Fics I took inspiration from:

"Dear Diary: Today, I killed someone" by Fey_wilde on Ao3 (https://archiveofourown.org/works/52170592)

"I Feel Too Weak to Stand" by Eternal_Era on Ao3 (https://archiveofourown.org/works/48067240)

"fault lines" by garlic_sauc3 on Ao3 (https://archiveofourown.org/works/41924196)

Fics I've written based on this idea:

"Glitch fever" by (ME!!) Swagsquid on Ao3 (https://archiveofourown.org/works/53400835)

"The warmth of another's embrace" by Swagsquid on Ao3 (https://archiveofourown.org/works/53449573/chapters/135284551)

"Forgotten hot chocolate" by Swagsquid on Ao3 (https://archiveofourown.org/works/54350146)

(Please read the tags and ratings before reading some of the fics!)

.

[r0semultiverse]

From season 3 episode 10 Revelations Chapter Two Live Blog

that's so fucking real, yeah & I'm glad Jim is finally fucking listening

That is an interesting insight into the potential laws of physics or I guess thermodynamics in Fromville.

OKAY SO SOMETHING SIGNIFICANT HAPPENED AT THAT TRUCK IN THE PAST. MAYBE CHILD KIDNAPPINGS? IDK

YA GOT CAUGHT. lmao

Ellis probably wants to scream at this little boy, I get it, but oof this whole situation fucking sucks.

Well, that's unsettling to hear you say that so confidently. Not beating the you-know-where-she-is allegations that's for sure!

YEAH ACTUALLY, THAT SOUNDS PRETTY CRAZY! Once again, unsettling to hear you say that so confidently!

My brain: "Hey Shadow, it's me, the devil, like in the Bible!" /reference

Boyd, I think this collective influence hollow ghost waterlogged lady thing isn't gonna let him.

OH MY GODS, WAIT, WHAT IF THE VOICES WERE TALKING ABOUT THE LITTLE BOY IN WHITE? I'm probably super late to figuring this out.

Not if the chest burster from Alien or Predator or whatever it's called has anything to say about it.

Elgin, that also sounds absolutely not within the realm of possibility! Especially not with at least 2 more seasons planned (idk if greenlit or not though).

YEAH, LIKE I WAS SAYING, UNDERSTANDABLE REACTION! Poor Elgin though, he's hardly in his right mind. Fromville's got it's grips on his psyche right now.

DONNA ME TOO THE FUCK, HOLY FUCKING SHIT. THIS WENT FROM 100 TO 500 REAL QUICK!!!

Even Ellis is having some second thoughts here it looks like at least to me.

Oh shit and with that I'm hitting 29 images already. Better make the 30th one count I guess. (okay took out a few images actually I'll try to be more sparing with them)

What is Victor gonna show him that's gonna make him angry?? I'm so confused.

Buddy, that's your papa, I don't think he could hate you.

KHATRI'S ACTOR IS SO FUCKING COOL EVERY TIME. lmao

Ghost Khatri or whatever is making itself look like him kinda has a point.

Khatri's making some good points, but is it him or a mimicry? Kinda interesting to think about especially given Jade's earlier words.

FATIMA OH GODS THIS IS GONNA BE HARD TO WATCH ISN'T IT.

LMAOOOO OH NO POOR JADE xD that is the look of a man who is about to lose his shit on some ghost kids HAHAHAH I'm fucking screaming "something more to say than fucking 'anghkooey'" got me fucking cackling audibly

HOLY SHIT IT'S LIKE THE CICADAS ARE LAUGHING AT HIM WTF OR IS THAT JUST HOW THEY SOUND USUALLY?

OH BUDDY DON'T.... DON'T DO IT...

Even Ellis is trying to stop him. oh Boyd....

"Now I need to do what I need to do." OH FUCKKKKKK THAT LINE GOES HARD!!

Thank you Henry for being here for your boy even though it's a super traumatic moment. :(((

HOLY SHIT MUSIC LANGUAGE!?!? I was just listening to a Homestuck video about that! 🤯

Elgin, you aren't making a great case for yourself right now. Boyd, I don't even know at this point man idk.

Okay, but why "can't" he though? Is he literally physically unable to? Or will ghost lady fucking kill him if he does? I mean Boyd is about to if she doesn't so idk maybe just tell him.

OH GODS THIS IS HARD TO WATCH FUCKKKKKKK

HOLY SHIT WHAT IF QUE SERA SERA IS THE FUCKING SONG THAT'S BEING DECODED? IT'S THE FUCKING OPENING SONG I BET.

Tabitha, you're a fucking genius.

A STORYWALKER?????? Someone who visits chapters of the story that already happened huh... wait will this have a butterfly effect on things?

WAIT YEAH THE FUCKING ROPE, SO IT DID HAVE AN EFFECT..... WAIT HOLY FUCK SO.... HOW MANY WEIRD THINGS HAVE BEEN PEOPLE TIME TRAVELING??

'No one can change a story once it's been told." Okay so explain the rope thing then?? Time loops theory??? idk

Sara.... what are you doing hun? What's uhhhh what's going on? Oh gods is she gonna continue where Boyd left off?

OH SARA HONEY NOOOO OH GODDDDDSSS OH NOOO DON'T PLEASE DON'T BUT IDK SHITTT THIS WHOLE THING SUCKS

oh god SARA NO SARA NO SARA NOOOO YOU WERE DOING SO GOOD

HOLY FUCK SO HE COULD ACTUALLY TELL THEM, BUT OH NO SARA :(((((( OH GIRLIE.....

MUSIC TIME BABEY LET'S DO THIS TIME TRAVEL SPACE TRAVEL OR SPACE TIME TRAVEL SHIT LETS MEET SOME GHOST KIDS IDFK

Okay anyone know what song Jade is playing like actually? Or was it commissioned for the show? Man looks damn good playing that violin though! 🔥

WHAT THE FUCK WHAT'S COMING OUT OF THAT TRAP DOOR WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK

YEAH OKAY JUST GONNA PUT A SENSITIVE CONTENT WARNING ON THE POST MAYBE, WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK IS THAT?

"I'll be right behind you, okay?" Famous last words...😬

wait..... these stairs look like Tabitha's light house dream!

Well, you've summoned them with their song! 👀 The unofficial captions call it "Jade's melody."

WHAT IS THAT LIGHT????

THE THINGS THAT CAME OUT AT NIGHT SACRIFICED THEIR CHILDREN??? OH FUCK.... SO WAIT..... OH SHIT... OH NO IS FATIMA BECOMING ONE BY FROMVILLE'S HAND? OH SHIT OH NO OH FUCK PLEASE NO

Fromville's entity promised those former people they would live forever if they sacrificed their kids to it? Monkey's paw type of deal to make I guess given what it turns them into. 👀

The gang's all here! /reference

Oh gods please don't let Fatima become one.... oh no oh fuck.... oh god if she does there goes multiple main characters too... oh shit oh fuck im nervous.

THIS BABY IS THE SIZE OF A GROWN ASS ADULT WHAT THE FUCKING SHIT IS HAPPENING?!?!

OH NOOOOO THEY FUCKING BROUGHT BACK JERMA!!! 😭 Why is the fucking happy smiler back?? Stay dead!!!

ANGHKOOEY MEANS "REMEMBER" OMG

DID THEY JUST INHERIT THE MEMORIES OF THE FROMVILLE MONSTERS PRE-MONSTERFICATION???

Jim be less aggressive, but I'm right there with you, I'm also confused as shit. Did she make multiple bracelets to cope with the loss of Thomas? What's Jade's deal then???

"The reason I felt what Miranda felt is because I was Miranda." IM SORRY????? EXCUSE ME!?!?!? Like as in reincarnation?? Wait then who was Jade?? Was he Christopher??

HE WAS OH MY GODS WHAT THE FUCK

WAIT THAT'S NOT OUR JULIE!!! HER HAIR IS SHORTER!!!!! WOAH OK OKAY SO TIME TRAVEL REAL THEN TIME TRAVEL SUPER FUCKING REAL

MGM OR EPIX OR WHOEVER THE FUCK YOU BETTER GIVE US THOSE 2 MORE SEASONS BECAUSE WHO THE FUCK IS THIS AND WHY IS HE OUT DURING THE DAY!?!?!

Well, RIP Jade and Jim probably. Right as Jim became a likeable character too smh. 😔✌

THIS IS THE FUCKING PHONE GUY!?!??! "Man in the Yellow Suit" oh yes very fucking specific, thanks.

Never thought I'd be calling a 2nd character phone guy, TWO NICKELS!!

"Well, RIP Jade and Jim probably. Right as Jim became a likeable character too smh. 😔✌" I WAS JOKING I WAS JUST MAKING A WITTY REMARK OR WHATEVER 😭😭

ALSO THE LIGHT HOUSE DREAM HAVING THE CHILDREN'S VOICES MAKES SO MUCH SENSE NOW BECAUSE THOSE SAME STAIRS LED TO THE MONSTER BIRTH SCENE & THAT'S INVOLVED WITH CHILD SACRIFICES

[genesisvirus]

What's the twiddlefinger mod?

oh man. time to look like a nerd (i'm also clueless af this is just what hyperfixating on this mod for two days does to you)

twiddlefinger is a fnf mod. i'm sure we all know what fnf is atp.. we're gonna ignore that tho. i'd probably recommend looking at this video first (link leads to youtube video), mostly cuz i think jumping into it without knowing wtf is going on adds to the humor of it all. i'm gonna explain more about the mod events surrounding it that i could uncover cuz tbh the absurdity of some of this stuff just NEEDS to be mentioned. so you can watch the video before or after the ramble tbh

okay so if you're like me you went wtf is this mod and why does the song kinda slap tho.. so here's the basics that i've found while trying to find info, as someone that lives under a rock

-the characters and everything are based on a youtube channel called max design pro, which is known for using the uhm.. gegagedigedagedago chicken nugget meme??? in their videos.. basically a content farm channel generating likes by making kids think their lives can help the characters in the videos. that's where the help = like mechanic in the mod came from

-the main character, max, is a monkey. i'm apparently one of few people that could tell immediately? i think i'm insane

-okay so this one's a doozy. this is part of a trend in fnf mods going on now where people make one-off mods based on typically children horror content with lyrical parts in the middle of the songs, and where the devs are hidden in anonymity. this was apparently started by endless aethos, a fnf mod based on.. supermariologan? analog horror shit?? trust me i'm WAY more clueless about that one. apparently the main dev used a one-off account but the mod got cancelled once people found out they were a controversial dev, so it's kinda becoming a joke now.

-the lore is there is no lore. i can't find it. the devs said they're gonna make a qna but from what i can tell it's not made yet, all i know is the mod is a love story, max was corrupted with SOMETHING.. cuz in the good ending he does revert back to normal once you save him. idk tho. also in the bad ending he accidentally kills nugget. oops..

-the animation in the lyrical part used to be a FAN ANIMATION?? i just gotta show that off cuz i'm like. obsessed with the art. the animation is so good and apparently the devs thought so too cuz they brought the dude in to make the animation in here..

-now for the crazy part. max design pro saw the mod. they first made minor references in a couple of animations but now more elements are showing up. max from this mod shows up in the animations now. the good ending of this mod is legit CANON to the channel it was based on now. they straight up made a fnf mod canon to their content farm channel i am not joking

-and before you ask "wait do they know the mod is lowkey shipping their characters-" they absolutely do. they referenced the ship art in their video. they fucking KNOW GUYS. i don't think y'all know how insane it is for a content farm channel to not only be aware of the content their fans are making but MAKE IT CANON IN THEIR VIDEOS.. LIKE WTF IS GOING ON

and that was my essay on a satirical fnf mod about a monkey wanting to eat a chicken nugget hope to see y'all guys once i draw gay angst again

[krystal-kade]

What's your opinion on the hazbin hotel songs?

(I've heard a few and i think they're okay..)

I'm so glad you asked bc I have some OPINIONS

(I'm not gonna talk about the pilot, just the episodes)

I've watched the first four episodes and they're better than I expected, but my expectations were on the floor

The first song is "Happy Day in Hell" from "Overture." Although this song/plotpoint should have been WAY later in the series, I like it. It feels like "Inside of Every Demon is a Rainbow" from the pilot, however both songs are on my playlist. It's a good song that serves as a recap of the pilot, showing Charlie's personality, motives, and her relationship with Vaggie (a little). It's a nice song with little substance, and feels like a Disney Princess' "i dream of something more" song. 7/10

In the same episode, we get "Hell is forever" sung by Adam. THE Adam. The first man Adam. Charlie meets with the Angels (just Adam and Lute, a girlboss exterminator who I think is in love with Adam?) and discusses her plan to redeem sinners. Adam laughs her off, singing "Hell is Forever," trying to convince Charlie that sinners can't change. Adam is such a dickbag that it's hard to like any part of this scene. He is really disrespectful towards women, grossly sexual, swears more than most characters in the show, and talks about being the "original dick." It wasn't unbearable, but it's probably the most forgettable song so far. 2/10

Next is "Stayed Gone" from the episode "Radio Killed the Video Star." It feels like a rap battle. It's a competitive song between Alastor and Vox that takes place over the radio and on TV respectively. A basic rundown is that Vox is kind of horny and down bad for Alastor, won't admit it. Vox is really pissed that Alastor came back (he was gone for 7 years) and is basically going on TV to shit on him. However, before he left, Vox had asked Alastor to join the Vees, (an influential group of overlords with names that start with 'V'; it's giving middle school popular girls) and Alastor refused. Vox is mad that Alastor didn't join, which leads Alastor to drop the iconic line "I said no and now he's pissy, that's the tea." This is probably one of my favorite songs in HH. It's catchy and unproblematic (which seems to be difficult for Viv). 8/10

"It starts with Sorry" is a song Charlie sings to Sir Pentious, telling him she'll accept him into the hotel if he owns up to his mistakes. It's an okay and forgettable song, but it's super ironic. A song about acknowledging you've hurt people, apologizing, and becoming a better person? In Vivienne fucking Medrano's show? Absolutely hilarious to listen to, if you go at it with a different perspective. Viv should take her own advice. 3/10

The episode "Scrambled Eggs" is based more around women (shocker, it wasn't written by Viv or Adam). The first song in this episode is "Respectless." It's sung by Velvette, one of the Vees, and Carmilla Carmine, an overlord. Velvette brings a decapitated angel head to an overlord meeting, and announces that angels CAN be killed, contrary to their previous belief. Velvette suggests they fight back against the angels and the exterminations, while Carmilla is adamant against it. The song's fine, but I especially love Velvette's lines. She has an English accent (Essex? I think?) and basically says "I'm not just a bitch. I'm THE bitch" and I love her for it. 5/10

Right after that, we find out that Carmilla killed the angel, which would have been shocking, but we only knew her for like, 5 minutes. The meeting's over, and it's just her and a few others. She says that she killed the angel to protect her daughters, and that going to war would endanger them again (basically "going to war endangers the people we started killing for"). She sings "Whatever it Takes" about protecting those she loves? I think, the song wasn't good enough to pay attention. This song's got a side-by-side with Vaggie, who's singing about wanting to protect Charlie. It's a sweet and nice song, but was just kinda mid. There's also a problem with Vaggie's singing, in which her voice is deep and monotonous, but her singing is light and high-pitched. 4/10

Oh boy. The next episode. "Masquerade." The first song is "Poison," sung by Angel Dust. It was released early, and got lots of hype and controversy. Similar to "Addict," it's a song where Angel talks about his struggles with addiction and his sexual abuse at the hands of his pimp, Valentino. Both of these songs are also on my playlist. It's catchy and fun to listen to, while also tackling deeper topics. Angel feels like his sexual abuse is his fault, and although he absolutely hates it, he feels like he has no choice but to stay. The song on its own? 9/10. Then the episode came out. The song shows Angel dancing and singing this song while graphic images flash behind him. Images of his rape and sexual assault. This episode had ZERO trigger warnings. The creators of this song were Viv and Raph (I can't find his last name right now). We can only speculate for Viv, but Raph 100% has a Rape kink. He ships Angel x Valentino, posts cosplay and art shipping them, publicly sexually harassed (asked for the nudes of?) a 15 year old, and essentially has admitted he finds rape and SA hot. He also lied about being an SA victim. Neither Viv nor Raph are SA victims. This song is just to fuel their rape kinks. Viv and Raph have yet to apologize for sexualizing SA, and have since doubled down on why this is "good representation." Truly disgusting, I have no choice but to say 0/10

"Loser, Baby" is similar to "Poison" in the sense that's it's fine until you REALLY think about it. In this song, Husk tells Angel that he used to be an overlord, but lost his power to Alastor. He says that he understands how Angel feels, since both their souls belong to overlords. The song is supposed to portray a "you're not alone, I understand what you're going through" message, but instead feels victim blame-y, with Husk kinda telling Angel that he should just try to ignore and move past it because everyone struggles. 6/10 song, 0/10 message

The songs were kinda disappointing, especially the last two. Fuck Vivienne Medrano