#but i will die alone lol
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🎀Headcanons how Twisted Wonderland boys met you and what kind of family you'd have 🎀Hearstlabyul
‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗ TᗯIᔕTEᗪ ᗯOᑎᗪEᖇᒪᗩᑎᗪ Characters Riddle, Ace, Deuce, Trey, Cater x F!Reader Warnings none ‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗‗
🌹Riddle Rosehearts
Riddle first met Y/n in the hospital where they both worked. As a dedicated doctor, Riddle was focused on maintaining order and ensuring everything ran smoothly. Y/n, an ICU nurse, caught his attention with her compassionate and calming presence, providing a grounding force to his sometimes easily angered nature. Their shared commitment to helping others brought them closer, and amidst the hectic hospital life, they found solace in each other's company.
Y/n and Riddle have a lovely daughter who brings joy to their lives. They named her Lily, after her mother's favorite flower. Despite Riddle's strict nature, he melts into a caring and doting father when it comes to his little girl. He strives to be the best parent he can be, balancing his commitment to maintaining order with showering Lily with love and attention. They create a nurturing environment where Lily can flourish and grow, guided by her parents' unwavering support.
❤️Ace Trappola
Ace attempts to strike up a conversation with Y/n at the lively club, drawn to her magnetic charm. However, the blaring music proves to be a formidable opponent, drowning out their words in a sea of beats and bass. Undeterred, Ace flashes his signature mischievous grin and resorts to using exaggerated hand gestures and expressive facial expressions to communicate. He playfully points at the dance floor, inviting Y/n to join him for a dance instead. With a wink and a nod, he lets the music be their language, as they move together in sync, laughing and enjoying the night without needing to say a word. After that they soon got married and they’re now proud parents.
Ace and Y/n are proud parents of two children, a boy, and a girl. Their son, Arthur, inherited Ace's mischievous charm and cheekiness, making him a bundle of energy and excitement. Their daughter, Noelle, is a quick thinker like her father, and her honesty always keeps the family on their toes.
♠️Deuce Spade
Y/n and Deuce met at a blastcycle event where he tried to impress her but failed miserably. Deuce excitedly tried to start his blastcycle, but it failed repeatedly. No matter how hard he tried, the engine just wouldn't start. Feeling flustered and disappointed, he was about to give up when Y/n stepped in and comforted him, suggesting they try again later. Deuce felt relieved and grateful for her understanding. Instead, he took her on a wonderful date, and they both had a great time. As they spent time together, their hearts connected, and they fell in love. Y/n and Deuce are blessed with three children who bring laughter and happiness to their lives. Their eldest son, Oliver, is a reflection of his father's straightforward and hardworking nature. The twins, a boy named Bruce and a girl named Suzie, add double the joy to their family. Bruce has a playful and adventurous spirit like his mother, while Suzie embodies her father's nurturing and caring traits. Together, they create a loving and harmonious family that supports each other through thick and thin.
♣️Trey Clover Trey and Y/n's history goes back to their childhood when they were neighbors. They spent their days playing and sharing innocent adventures together, forging a lasting bond. Over the years, they grew apart, each following their own path. However, fate had other plans, and years later, when Trey worked in his bakery, they met again. The memories of their childhood friendship came rushing back, and they rediscovered the joy of each other's company. This time, their connection blossomed into something deeper, and they fell in love, cherishing the past and looking forward to creating a beautiful future together.
Y/n and Trey's family is filled with love and femininity as they have three wonderful daughters. The eldest, Jenny, takes after her father's laid-back and rational nature, radiating a calm and soothing aura. The middle daughter, Hattie, brings a playful and mischievous side to the family, always keeping things lively and fun. The youngest, Ella, is the light of their lives, with her innocence and love bringing warmth to their hearts. As a father of three girls, Trey couldn't be prouder, cherishing each moment with his precious daughters.
♦️Cater Diamond
Cater and Y/n first connected through the internet, forming a friendship based on their casual and easygoing natures. Their conversations flowed effortlessly, and they found solace in each other's virtual presence. As time passed, their bond grew stronger, and they realized that their connection was something special. Their friendship bloomed into a deeper affection, and they decided to take a leap of faith, meeting in person to explore the feelings that had developed between them. Their virtual connection seamlessly transitioned into a real-life love story, as they discovered that they were meant to be together, united by their shared love for life and each other.
Y/n and Cater may not have children of their own, but their love extends beyond blood ties. They adopted a beautiful girl named Janell, who captured their hearts from the moment they met her. Cater's peppy and easygoing nature combined with Y/n's nurturing spirit create a loving home for Janell to thrive in. They shower her with all the care and attention she deserves, and in return, Janell fills their lives with joy and happiness. Their bond as a family is unbreakable, and they cherish the special connection they share with their adopted daughter.
You can find the other parts here! Hearstlabyul (You are here) Savanaclaw/Octavinelle Scarabia/Pomefiore Ignihyde/Diasomnia
#twst#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland fanfiction#fanfiction#twst fanfiction#fluff#twisted wonderland x reader#twst x reader#riddle rosehearts#ace trappola#deuce spade#trey clover#cater diamond#god if i could have a family with one of these dream boots i would simply die#but i will die alone lol#daddy trey always has me feeling some kind of way#i carry their babies anyday
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i feel a bit bad for not posting so um.......... here. stuff i actually finished and didn't abandon.
#please don't look too close at ghe animation i will die#i do apologise gor like. NO posts at all. its been hard to draw thumbs up#cult of the lamb#cotl#cotl lamb oc#cotl lamb#cotl narinder#narilamb#technically. I DONT KNOW leave me alone#my art#hey lol does anyone want to hear fun facts about my lamb? no? okay. i have my target audience anyway (points at sam#cotl animation#....yeah. okay bye
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i think it is a TRAGEDY we dont have enough interaction with the two queens (mel and cait)
#is it obvious that im rewatching their fight scene tgt LOL#the showrunners knew we would all die from their presence alone (because theyre too amazing) hence why we dont have enough scenes of them#WE WERE ROBBED WE WERE ROBBED /jk#i hope i can finish these gifsets soon too#im also sad we dont have more of the flop duo in laws (jayce and vi)#oh well i can imagine them all in my head ig lol#personal tag
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Some instances that I feel show how some messages in MHA are detrimental, especially on how victims react to their abuser, can be gauged by responses that tend to be highly prevalent in the fandom.
(Definitely not every fan, but a great majority).
Endeavor is a great example. Whenever you post criticizing his approach to atonement (and ultimately criticizing Horikoshi’s writing), you get BOMBARDED by people either belittling you for not liking his character or essentially forcing you to like his character by frantically writing “at least he tried” arguments.
If I have the CHOICE whether to forgive his character or not, especially given he goes through an atonement arc and not a redemption arc, why is any form of criticism about his abusive behavior and essentially his abuse of power practically ignored by the story unacceptable?
The message was detrimental because people operate on the notion that for victims to be good people, they must forgive and even help their abusers. MHA presents people who choose not to forgive him as either a monster (Toya) or inconvenient (Natsuo). And if they are still unforgiving, they must admire the abuser for doing the bare minimum (taking responsibility; this is also about Natsuo).
Essentially, they are considered "imperfect victims" because they weren't merciful in their approach to their abuser.
The majority of the fandom tends to ignore the lack of actual consequences for Endeavor's actions because he vows to talk to Toya every day. Insisting that doing the bare minimum, which is recognizing his son's existence and suffering, became his "hell" is a wildly fucked up message, in my opinion.
It harps on the issue mentioned above that if a victim isn't receptive to forgiveness or doesn't act "demure," they are seen as an inconvenience—which is how the Todoroki family ultimately views Toya.
On a less critical note, I'll vent, so if you don't like this, just ignore it.
I'm so fucking tired of stories depicting imperfect victims as people who deserve death and torture. Plus, having to be on the brunt of so many people acting like you're morally fucked because you're not impressed with how a writer handled abuse. Horikoshi is not the first writer to try to atone a character who is an abuser (and he isn't the first to fail at that, either).
I'm not about to dick-ride every decision every author makes. Especially if the message convinces some audience members that victims are inherently broken if they can't bring themselves to forgive and/or admire someone who hurt them.
#me: no systematic consequences for Enji's abuse is frustrating#some MHA fans: well what the fuck is he supposed to do then? die?#me: ... why does everyone in this fandom believe dying is the solution for every crime?#MHA: twice's death is justified toga's death is justified tenko's death is justified people the HPSC killed aren't brought up again#me: oh yeah lol#the experiences I had with the MHA fandom on TikTok so far have been the most toxic interactions I've ever had in fandom#like I used to think the bad rep was just normies being introduced to fandom for the first time#but no#people were right :v#if you like Enji and you're triggered by this#please leave me alone#also please don't try to convince me the end was good or that the story is good#I'm legit so tired of having to deal with that#each to their own#mha critical#bnha critical#anti enji todoroki#anti endeavor#todoroki family#todoroki touya#touya todoroki#todoroki shouto#shouto todoroki#todoroki natsuo#natsuo todoroki#RIP natsuo#you had some rebellion in you#he had to have a little bit of boot-licking by the end#the poor thing
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thinking about how eiji's a pole vaulter and how ash talks about eiji "flying" and how eiji's associated with bird imagery and how eiji's free (unlike ash) and how eiji comes in on a plane and leaves on a plane and how ash cannot fly, ash cannot be free, how nyc is ash's prison, and how ash is the leopard who dies climbing the mountain, unable to live at such elevation, how he was trying to reach the sky and be free but was always stuck to the earth, how he chose to die instead of climbing back down, how he chose to die where he could see the sky and hope and freedom almost like a bird with eiji's letter right in front of him rather than letting everything go wrong and ruin it once again, how eiji's a failed pole vaulter anyway, how a bad fall ruined his career and grounded him (physically and emotionally), how it took flying to america and meeting ash and needing to save him and skip for him to try flying again, how he landed hard and harsh and still the thought of that escape compelled ash to protect eiji at all costs because if he could fly that means something to him, even if he doesn't think he can fly, how eiji is the manifestation of his hope and how when he breaks and asks eiji to stay with him a while he folds himself over his legs and weighs him down and traps him and grounds him, how ash fights like hell to keep eiji alive not because he thinks he can be like him (hopeful, flying, innocent), but because he makes him forget the gravity of his situation, and so he can see eiji fly again. how he wants to see him escape. how eiji is a bird and ash is a wildcat and how ash never once saw eiji as prey. how eiji never saw ash as a predator. how it is eiji's naivete that first endears ash to him, how it is his freedom and flight and removal from darkness and his ability to leave that darkness that really roots eiji in ash's blood as something essential to him keeping on living in this hell of nyc. how it is that distance from the violence and that hope for the future that ash chooses to surround himself in as he dies. how ash dies in a dream because he feels more than anything that he can't fly like eiji, that he can never leave. how his violence is a part of him and will be forever, how it weighs him down. how he wants to enjoy the view from the mountainside rather than looking up from the ground below. as if they can both fly. as if he is with him up there and not grounded. eye-to-eye with what he can't have, seeing eiji's homeland: the sky. how he dies trying to reach the top because he couldn't take retreating and trying again. how ash, tired and tired and tired and convinced it will go on forever if he crawls back down the mountain, chooses to close his life deluged in eiji, in eiji's insistence that they can fly together, in eiji's hope for him and for them, in eiji's beautiful dream. how ash dies without trying to realize that dream. how ash, in dying, destroys it.
#banana fish spoilers#I'M HAVING A FUCKING MOMENT#mutual reblogged exactly one (1) piece of ash fanart and sent me on A Multiple Hour Long Thing and now im rewatching it lol#yes i am only on episode 2 yes i am still going to write big long analysis posts ANYWAY#whatever hope this makes sense. anyway#banana fish#okumura eiji#ash lynx#asheiji#hhhhh i can't believe i've only watched this twice in like what 5.5 years?? sheesh#anywayyyyyyy i care about them a lot ok. god#and yes i DO kinda have beef with the decision to kill ash off at the end but it really does say so much About his character#that he chose to die in the way that he did even though he's been throwing his life away since episode 1#dying in peace in comfort in solitude rather than in some chaotic battlefield.... ough...... in the peace eiji alone could give him.....#anywayss i relate to ash a little more than i should so. this one's for us cool guy bottoms up#edit i uh.... i forgot it was a leopard.... in the story..... but whatever it doesn't really affect the symbolic meaning it's just embarras#ing that i forgot >;/
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if i wake up and dont find this fiend under my tree in his lil tube i WILL throw up
#snap chats#'snap didnt you say youd be terrified if magneto was real let alone in your house' ok and. the fear is part of it we're moving on#increasing favorite genre of magneto is him being in goofy prisons bro get him OUT OF THERE !!!#evil bisexuals go into the tube of shame....#i watched Pryde of the X-Men last night. hi. is this just an excuse to post about that Maybe Idk You Dont Know Me#someone remind me i need to gif like two things from this short jaerLKJVealkjelkj#it was cute ... i really dug the art style ..... also the animation was nice#not super crazy or anythin but there was some small things bout it i appreciated#still very confused why logan was australian like the first xmen movie wasnt even a concept yet ..... whats all this then lol ...#OH ALSO this is the thing where magneto's like. 6'10 💀 tall prick can he die.#anyway im off to sleep. merry christmas my friends !!!!!
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Okay but what fucking alloromantic says that they’re aro just because they can’t get a date?!
#how does your arophobic brain think I’m not romantically attracted to anyone means I think I’m going to die alone?!#aromantic#aro#aromanticism#arophobia#lgbtqia#queer#funny#lol#humor
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i think you can be as critical about the venezuelan opposition and maría corina and edmundo as you want but arent venezuelans allowed to choose for themselves even if the options arent perfect? are you willing to justify electoral fraud and police brutality, class inequality, bad management of resources, lack of maintenance of the country, breach of the law, lack of investment in health services and education etc etc just because the person doing it is someone you like or because you don't like the other option? are people at fault for wanting something different?
#i don't like idolizing politicians either in fact i dont think anyone should#a government official being good to the people would literally just be doing their job#but there are reasons for how much people love maría corina as of now and it's because shes one of the few members of the opposition#that has not completely given up on us or just sold themselves to the regime#from the days of chavez and when nobody would pay attention to her or think she would accomplish anything#people are allowed to have hope#and im very sick of this tendency to dehumanize other countries(particularly those from the third world)#and act like they cannot defend themselves or choose for themselves#when they try they are told not to and to let others do the job. how fair is that?? who are you helping?#if maría corina and edmundo fail us it would just turn into what we are already living through. we know it already#if they keep their promises and things go well or at least better then yay!#but we know what's going to happen under maduro#the country will keep deteriorating until everybody either dies or leaves#or people will keep living miserably#i thought people liked the idea that you shouldnt have to work out of your ass to have your neccesities covered!#well people are exploited here on the daily and don't have access to half things they need#let alone pursuing their dreams. theyre not allowed to dream#it's either we die or we don't die for me#i want to see my country healing thats all. you think maduro will give us that? absolutely not#it's always like this with countries that others view as just a land of natural resources or as a land of dumb poor people to project onto#just allow us to see where this goes. it's what the people chose. respect it.#oh ok vent over#Venezuela#this is very messily written i havent had breakfast yet#not to mentionnnnnnnn people on other places know what it's like having to choose for the lesser evil but when vzla does it it's wrong. lol#chavismo is not going to save anyone other than the regime. even chavistas themselves die under it#a lot of us were born under chavismo and want to see life outside of it
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i'm thinking about the guards outside aventurine's room in the reverie. stuck working a boring security job on THE planet of festivities, stationed outside a room in boring reality where someone's literally just sleeping all day. absolutely jackshit to do.
but there's no way aventurine would trust just any old grunt to guard him when he's that vulnerable; they had to have been hand-picked, personally vetted over years of working for him. it's no small feat to become someone aventurine trusts not to stab him in the back, even with the built-in insurance that if you shank your boss, he can't sign your paychecks anymore.
so they were familiar enough with him to know how he works, i.e., pulling off insane stunts and doing it solo. i have to think they're the kind of people who would've wanted to join him - not because they're sore about not getting to see the dream, but because they want to guard him IN the dream. you have a whole team of us, boss! put us to work!
and he keeps insisting no, he has to do it alone. it's too risky.
what could notorious gambler aventurine possibly find "too risky?" it's not that he thinks they'll slow him down or get in his way; it's not that he just prefers working alone or hates relying on others. that's what other people, in other departments, might think.
but these guys know: he does these missions solo because he doesn't want to risk their lives - that's the unacceptable risk to him.
(they also know not to ever say so aloud, because said notorious gambler has a reputation to maintain, and "worries about his employees' wellbeing" does not fit the image.)
#alright it's finished percolating#i realize the conclusion isn't like. saying anything new. but he has to have SOME employees he can trust (inasmuch as he trusts anyone)#and i want to know what they're like. aventurine's top men. the rare few in the company who don't hate his guts#idt he's the kind of boss u could mouth off to but could they say “director this plan sounds nuts you really don't have to go it alone”#obvs he'd never take that particular advice lol but i like to think he appreciates the candor of a (select) few over a bunch of yes-men#u gotta have a henchman or two who's not just a simp. it's like trace minerals in ur diet. zinc and savvy henchmen#hsr#hsr meta#aventurine#also i bet these guys felt like absolute SHIT when they found out what happened to him in the dream wrt nihility & sunday#like what do u MEAN u didn't know u wouldn't die. what do u mean u got branded with a harmony timebomb that would just up and kill u
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Imagine a like minds summer. Same characters same time, just summer. How would Alex and Nigel meet? Interact? What different exterior force would force them to meet. Or would Nigel seek Alex out due to him being in his radar. (due to his beliefs of their father’s club) lol imagine Nigel stalking Alex and planning a special meet up only for Alex to blow him off.
Alex also living at the school. Imagine the bullshit they’d get up to in a mostly empty school all to their selves.
What were Alex’s father’s rules during the summer when everyone else was gone? (I just know Alex broke most of them) what other types of mischief did he, Josh, and Raj get up too. When and where (if) did they meet up?
Maybe they couldn’t meet up much and Alex would be left even more alone. (Which is perfect for Nigel to get to him)
Alex and Nigel could have also met if both of their fathers brought them to one of their meetings or whatever the club does, and they meet in the early summer. Having around two months. I bet they’d only have a few days or couple weeks of them not bickering.(or trying to hurt one another)
All the victims would still be dead of course, just slightly different situations leading up to the events.
Perhaps one of the rare times that Alex gets to meet up with Josh is when they plan to mess with Nigel. Making Nigel come ‘meet up with Alex’ then drugging him and getting him in the train. Then Josh dies and Alex feels even more guilty.
They could meet Susan at a corner store where she’s working for the summer. Alex would know her because he goes there often to get snacks and better food than the school food. Nigel would still see her as Alex’s Maraclea and would kill her.
Viewing it as a film, I think it would have a bit of a lighter feeling than the original, but still have its dark undertones. A lot of scenes would be at dusk and dawn. (I’m a firm believer in sunrise Alex and sunset Nigel)
Nigel’s death would come with the same fate. It would still be at the train tracks and it would be raining, but the sun would rise just a bit earlier and the clouds would eventually drift off, and Alex would be faced with it all.(being dragged away from Nigel’s body just as the sun peaks through, he is reborn) 9 months from August would be May.
I’d like to think that it would be the summer in-between the last school year. Alex coming back after missing the first month of school due to being detained for questioning. And being known as the faulty son who watched as a boy killed himself after killing his parents. (If the public even knew that) Alex would be absolutely haunted throughout that year. Quiet like he’s never been before. Then in May he disappears and no one can find him. He’s now carrying on Nigel’s legacy. Susans card is found and he becomes a suspect for her death.
But he is free. The weather is warm and Alex is reminded of Nigel, he must complete the cycle.
I would totally write a fic but I have no knowledge of what a teenager 2006 British summer looks like. I don't even know what a 2025 British summer looks like.
#I love spewing nonsense#imagine them getting an ice cream treat - Alex would totally get a brain freeze#idk if it’s obvious but I NEEED summer rn I miss the sun so much#nigel would look almost ghostly in the sunlight cause he wouldn’t tan he’d just burn#Alex’s freckles would double in number#that is if either of them go out lmao#I wonder if that damn school would have good air conditioning- it really depends it looks old but rich so who knows about the student dos#dorms**#hmm would Nigel’s parents be away for most of the summer and he’d be all alone to his own devices#omg he’s such a freaky little shit#they’d come back and then die lol maybe like the same night or the next day after coming back#oh and then poor Susan just doing her job and gets murdered by the emo kid who came in with the cute redhead who stops by a lot#maybe I should write a fic even if it’s not fully accurate- problem is I’ve never written a fic before#but there’s always a first for everything#it was above 5 degrees Celsius so I’m very happy rn that’s why my thoughts are all over the place#I’ll probably edit this later cause omg is this absolute shit 😭#like minds#like minds 2006#nigel colbie#likeminds#alex forbes
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We’ve been waitin’ for you, now.
#lost#lostedit#tvedit#lost spoilers#jack shephard#nikolatexla#don't even think about listening to jack's theme while looking at this#it's time for me to get a life and forget about this series lol#when i become obsessed with something i feel terrible#my favourite thing about this finale was surely vincent :')#live together die alone. it's like vincent was there so he wouldn't die alone :')
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love thinking kipperlilly spends her afterlife looking for lucy in a familiar forest
#not art#fhjy#fhjy spoilers#like. does she have a mean of knowing lucy and yolanda got sent to cassandra's domain to hang out for a bit#kipperlilly's isolation means so much to me. she is punished for everything she's done she just doesn't pick up on it#until the moment she dies! one more funky thing that mirrors riz in which he's actively tried to cultivate a community and denied it#until the bad kids. while kipperlilly does not want or care about a community she just wants someone who validates her#but she does Need a community so she latches onto the person she lets closer to her to fulfill her emotional needs#she took the ritual willingly so this might genuinely be her first death. probably terrifying#probably not even enough bandwidth to feel mortified. maybe immediately seeking something comforting out of instinct alone#lmao honestly thinking too much abt fantasy high afterlifes gives me a headache And a visceral fear#Im not religious but I grew up in a culture with a dominantly buddhist/taoist cosmology its Scary that u just go to A Place after u die!!#and then ur still urself!!! thats scary to me what do u mean u stay like that forever. thats fucked#but yeah I think this influences how I see kipperlilly turn out a little bit. in a sense I think of her as being a ghost now#yknow. trying to solve something from life so she can move on and. stop living this life etc#man the reveal that lucy took being killed pretty seriously and is like yeah the others are decent and even sweet#and probably was just trying to hold her party together and do what she thinks is moral by hearing kipperlilly out#lol lmao etc. gods I gotta wonder how kipperlilly's mindset handled jawbones' help#it really is damn tragic tho. I stand by what I said folks like this will complain and be nasty to be around#but they dont have enough desire to inconvenience themselves to off the bat do something abt what they find unfair or whatever#its when theyre handed the seemingly very easy means to be right that they'll start being dangerous#its horribly tragic that the supposed metaplayer and the self-perceived mastermind turned out to ultimately be just an useful idiot#yknow what. I think personally in my heart kipperlilly moves on from her afterlife the moment she says sorry#doesnt even have to be to lucy but that's probably gonna be who received it#ah.... teenage rebellion. teenage gamejacking
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I feel like Vi should have gotten a monologue. Vi should have gotten an 'is there anything so undoing as a daughter?' moment where she really thinks about her relationship with her sister– just vi and her thoughts. her real thoughts. I want to see why she finally felt okay with letting jinx go. I want to see her consciously deciding to choose herself for once, instead of just being dragged around by the rest of the characters' motivations or trying to do what she thinks is best for other people. I want her to be selfish and not regret it. I wanted to see Vi making the (unforced!) decision to choose her own peace over trying to help her sister. I feel like jinx saw it and wanted that for Vi, and I wanted Vi to realize that, too.
#like i feel like she got there in the end but i really really wanted a scene where vi legitimately chooses her own happiness and needs#i think that the sex scene did that to some extent– but it also felt a little jarring?#i don't want an implication– i want vi to realize that her ENTIRE LIFE has been spent prioritizing her sister#and now vi needs to learn to prioritize herself#idkkkkk#i think i need to rewatch the act and form more thoughts tbh#but idk. family will ALWAYS come first for vi. she literally can't let her sister go and that was why jinx had to die#i'm glad that jinx recognized what vi had done for her and finally decided to put vi first instead of vi putting everyone else first#but i also wanted vi to put vi first lol#IDKKKK i'm sleep deprived leave me alone#arcane#arcane season 2 spoilers#arcane s2#arcane s2 spoilers#arcane season 2#arcane spoilers#arcane season two#arcane vi#vi arcane#jinx arcane#powder arcane#arcane powder#arcane jinx
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I have been seeing those videos of artists calling out people in the audience (particularly in the front/expensive spots) for not being enthusiastic or dancing along and though I get the sentiment especially when these artists then highlight the fans who are lively (those in cheaper spots) it does make me paranoid because I have been front row at shows where the artist can obviously see me and even if I am having a good time I do not really dance or move around a lot (I do sing along) because I am awkward and do not do that kind of stuff in public in front of people unless I am very intoxicated. at most I will like nod along. I promise I am having a good time I am not good with with social stuff. I know that I seem disinterested and high strung sorry. I could be having the time of my life and just be standing there nodding and singing
#I literally remember being like this as a kid like I’d rather die than do the chicken dance#if there is something mass synchronized or choreographed (dancing clapping etc) I do not like doing it idk why it makes me feel weird even#if everyone else is doing it. actually it’s the fact everyone is doing it and just following along#i am the exact opposite when alone though lol i dance a lot alone#< feel stuff like this is why I’ve had multiple people tell me they or other ppl we know think I am autistic
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Pokémon really gave us the quintessential big sister lol
#I know people don’t like her but I think Carmine’s great lol#like the way she interacts with her brother is just how siblings are lol#like them subtly fighting for who gets to be friends with the player is hundred percent what happens in real life lol#Have I played Scarlet and Violet yet? let alone the Teal Mask?#certainly not#would I die for Ogerpon? without a doubt#she’s the cutest thing#pokémon#pokémon scarlet#pokémon violet#teal mask#teal mask spoilers#not really cause she’s in the trailer but just to be sure#Pokémon scarlet and violet spoilers#pokémon scarvio#pokémon scarlet and violet#gen 9#pokémon gen 9#morpeko#carmine#carmine pokemon#sinistcha#blueberry academy#ogerpon#pokémon art#pokémon character
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every single time i post anything (other than when im asking for help, ofc.) i have to see all these ppl who dont talk to me anymore or who flat out ignore me, in my notes, and honestly just cant handle having to be forced to remember ppl and how theyre liking my shit despite all that as some weird bid. when i could instead just be talked to by any of anyone and have it take almost no time and id feel better easily just by not being alone. n this is why all everythings doing is just telling me i have to disappear and never love anyone or be thought of by anyone ever again. leave any chance for friends or betterment or hope for a better life or community behind. and i wish i could do more but im not given much choice <3
#im not mad. i just want fucking. help. i didnt wanna die alone. but im being made to and i hate it#and guess what lol? they will neither care or see this .#ill get 0 anything on this and ill cry all day about it#hhh just give me a fucking chance to be better#but.. never
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