#but i was actually in the process of writing it anyway
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SVT reactions on finding out their partner reading smut
Author’s note : it truly has been a while since I posted anything at all.. I honestly have been passively using tumblr. I hadn't been motivated much to write even though I have ideas in my head. I wish I can write more, but for now I'm just gonna focus on my life and post on rare occasions like this when I feel like it. This one is just a sudden thought because some ppl at work are making this book club but they’re sharing all these high literature books. Like no hate, it just requires more brain power for me to read, so I don’t read them as often and I gravitate more to those easy to read spicy romantasies if you catch my drift. But anyway, they don’t need to know what I read in my free time so I just pretend I didn’t see anything lol But yea, it got me thinking about how SVT members would react when they found out the kind of literary corn their partner is reading hihihihihi Obviously, this is just a work of fiction, in no way I know how they would actually react and I wrote this solely for entertainment purposes. Please enjoy and lemme know what you think!
Rating : not sure how to rate this. I guess, there are some innuendos, but nothing explicit.
S.Coups
He walks into the room, sees you quickly shut your book, and immediately gets suspicious. "What are you reading?" He reaches for it, but you hold it tight. Now he has to know. When he finally peeks at a passage, his whole face goes red. He stammers, "I—uh—I didn’t see anything!" and power walks out like he’s on a mission. Later that night, he awkwardly asks, "So… Can I borrow it when you’re done?”
He immediately notices the playful glint in your eyes and before you could say anything, he quickly added, “It’s nothing, I’m just curious!”
Jeonghan
This man is a menace, he’ll have a field day. He would say things so casually just to watch you implode and be like “Aha~ so that’s what you like~” Before you can react, he snatches the book and starts reading out loud in the most dramatic voice possible. "‘His hands traced down her—�� Oh? Interesting." If you try to take it back, he holds it above your head and laughs. Later, he leans in, whispers with that shit eating smirk of his, "I should start using your books as references, huh?" and leaves you completely speechless. And the worst (best) part? He’d bring it up at random times too, like when you're least expecting it. "Hey, which chapter was your favorite? Asking for research purposes." 💀
Joshua
Bro is blushing when he reads what you were reading. He doesn’t expect that kind of scene when he joins you in bed and then reads along with you out of boredom. "My goodness… Is this what you love to read?" You, unaware that he was reading behind your shoulders all along, quickly closed your book as blush crept all over your face. "I—uh—I didn’t mean to intrude!" He hugged you and encouraged you to keep reading as he pulled you closer. But later, as he was on his phone with one hand while the other wrapped around you, he suddenly muttered, "So… do you, um, read those often?" and instantly regrets asking. He’s too polite to tease, but his brain is racing trying to process it.
Jun
Your book was laying on the table unattended as you were busy with your phone. Jun slowly picks it up, reads a line, and gives you a knowing smirk. "Ah… so this is what you like?" He savors your embarrassment. "You should’ve just told me~" Then, for the rest of the day, he randomly brings it up— "Would you like me to act out a scene for you?" Like he would say it completely seriously with that innocent but dangerous glint in his eyes. He’d lean in, smirk, and be like, "You know… I’m pretty flexible. We could test it out, purely for science." And then just grin knowingly when you start blushing.
Hoshi
He gasps so loudly you think something is wrong. "BABY. WHAT IS THIS?!" He dramatically grabs his chest like he’s about to faint. But then he gets curious. "Wait… lemme see that." Next thing you know, he makes it a whole event. He’d flop down next to you, stretch dramatically, and be like, "Okay, hear me out—I could definitely do this." Then he’d actually start attempting the position in the middle of the room, while you’re just sitting there face palming at his antics, "Babe… please—"
Wonwoo
Wonwoo would glance at your book, read a few lines, and then give you that poker face of his. Then, with the straightest face, he’d say, "Is the writing good, or do you just read it for the plot?" You stammer, and he smirks, "I should borrow it next. Expand my literary horizons." He won’t tease you outright, but you’ll catch him randomly quoting suggestive lines just to see your reaction. "Ah, so this is what you meant by 'intense character development'? 😏"
Woozi
He catches a glimpse of your book and immediately looks away. Ears red. He pretends he didn’t see anything, but later, he can’t help but ask, "So, uh… that book. What is it about?" If you try to explain, he’ll awkwardly nod and mumble, "Yeah. Okay. Got it." But if you tease him, "Do you want to read it with me?" he will malfunction on the spot. "Wh—NO. I mean—why would I—" and then he’ll be avoiding eye contact for the rest of the week. Dude is traumatized lmao
DK
He sees the book, skims a sentence, and literally jumps back like he got electrocuted. "WAIT—IS THIS—?!?!" His face is pure shock. "BABE, I THOUGHT YOU WERE INNOCENT!" He covers his eyes like he just walked in on something scandalous. But later, when you’re reading again, he peeks over your shoulder and whispers, "…What’s happening now?" He’d stare at the page, tilt his head, then look at you like, "Wait… is that physically possible? Are human spines supposed to bend that way?" Then he’d probably try to reenact the pose just to prove his point, and now you’re sitting there watching your boyfriend nearly sprain his back because of a book. He’d pause, look at you with wide eyes, and say, "Okay but… HOW?! Like, WHERE are their legs at this point??" Then he’d proceed to read the entire passage out loud just to make it sound even more ridiculous, laughing so hard he can’t breathe, but then he keeps reading because "Now I need to know how it ends."
Mingyu
He’d walk in, glance over your shoulder, and freeze. Then, after a solid three seconds of silence, he’d gasp so loud and grab his chest dramatically like he’s in a K-drama. "WAIT. HOLD ON. A REVERSE HAREM?? AM I NOT ENOUGH FOR YOU??"
He’d literally act heartbroken, pacing around the room, muttering things like:
"I give you all my love, all my attention, and THIS is how you repay me?!"
"So what, you want four more guys? Is this why you’ve been reading so much lately?"
"IS IT BECAUSE I CAN’T MULTIPLY?!"
And if you try to explain, he’s not hearing it. He’s already on his phone googling “how to kagebunshin no jutsu” while fake-sniffling in the corner. Bro is dramatic AF, but then he’s also the type to proceed to borrow the book (for research purposes he said), and end up getting way too into it. He’d come back blushing and stuttering like, "Sooooo I read it… and uh… I have some thoughts?? 😳"
The8
He’d glance at the book, shrug, and say, "Cool, do you like it?" before going back to whatever he was doing. But if you explain the plot, he might actually get curious and ask more questions in a totally nonchalant way. And when you least expected he would be like, "Hmm, it actually sounds kinda interesting… Can I read it after you?" but completely unbothered, like he’s asking for a normal book. He'd probably even come back after reading the book like, "Honestly, the plot wasn’t bad. The world building was solid. 4,3 stars out of 5"
He would even be willing to have an open discussion about the book and dissect it if you wish to. BUT!! He'd still take his chance to tease you by randomly dropping spicy one-liners just to fluster you. "I see why you liked chapter 12. 😏"
Seungkwan
The moment Seungkwan catches you reading a spicy book, he already knows something is up. You’re too focused, flipping pages way too fast, and your expressions keep shifting between wide eyes and bitten lips. His senses are tingling. So, of course, he just has to know.
"EXCUSE ME—WHAT ARE YOU READING?!" He snatches the book, skims a paragraph, and squeals. "OH MY— SWEETIE, THIS IS FILTHY!"
But then, it happens, the performance of his life aka reading it out loud dramatically while also reacting in real time.
“He traced his fingers down her—OH MY GOD, WHY IS IT STARTING LIKE THIS?!”
"His breath was hot against her ear as he whispered—" he pauses to look at you, scandalized. Cue his signature BOMBASTIC side eyes. "WHAT KIND OF LITERATURE IS THIS?!"
"She gasped as she felt his— NOPE. NOPE. NOT IN MY HOUSE."
But it doesn’t stop there. Oh no—he’s acting out the dialogue like he’s in a full-blown historical drama.
One moment, he’s dramatically dropping his voice to play the male lead, "You don’t know how long I’ve wanted you, my love."
Then, without missing a beat, he switches to a high-pitched, breathless tone to play the female lead. "B-but what if someone hears us?!"
He keeps reading, while still adding his own commentaries.
"Excuse me, WHERE are their hands right now???"
"Are they in a library? A CHURCH?! Oh, these people are going straight to JAIL."
"How is she still standing after that? I would’ve collapsed three pages ago."
He gasps, clutches his chest, and falls to the floor like he’s been fatally wounded by the sheer audacity of the scene. Meanwhile, you are absolutely DONE. You’re trying to snatch the book away, but he’s holding it above his head like he’s holding the last piece of food at a buffet.
"OH NO, I NEED TO KNOW HOW THIS ENDS."
And yes, he will never let you live this down. He will bring it up at the worst possible moment. "Hey guys, did I tell you about the time I caught y/n reading a BOOK OF SIN?"
Vernon
He walks in, glances at the book, and just goes, "Oh, cool." That’s it. No reaction. No judgment. Just vibes. Later, when you're talking about books, he casually asks, "So is that one of your favorites?" You choke on your drink, and he just nods, "Nice." The next time you’re reading, he randomly goes, "Oh, this one is a classic slow burn enemies to lovers trope. Good tension." You looked at him in shock at the realization that your boyfriend had read the book before and he just looked back at you with his usual laid back expression. “What? Did I say anything weird?”
Dino
He stares at the book, then at you, then back at the book. "Oh. Um. Cool." But five minutes later, he suddenly blurts, "But WHY do you read that?!" He’s so confused, but he tries to act mature about it. However, if you tease him, "Do you want to read it with me?" he IMMEDIATELY runs away, only to come back literally a minute later. He’s a little hesitant, but curiosity wins. He’d be like, "Wait… is that what people are reading these days?" and next thing you know, he’s HOOKED.
End note : obviously, I got carried away with Seungkwan’s. 🤣
#seventeen#carat#svt#svt reactions#seventeen ot13#svt crack#seventeen reactions#carat writer#caratblrclub#caratwritersclub
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I’m so glad that you wanted to start writing again! I know it must’ve been hard given everything that happened but we all support and appreciate you for everything!
I saw that you were taking asks since could I request shinsou with a reader who’s friends with the Bakusquad and reader laughs at absolutely anything and everything. Because personally I have a problem with laughing at everything and then proceeding to laugh for too long and annoying people. Okay so what I had in mind is like Shinsou is in 1-A now and he’s dating reader and she convinced him to sit at the Bakusquads lunch table when some random sits with them and calls her annoying and makes fun of her for laughing. And while the Bakusquad is about to defend their friend her lovely bf shinsou absolutely wrecks the random for making fun of his beautiful gf. And he later provides her comfort when she’s insecure about laughing. Bc I could really use that comfort rn.
And once again, we all love and appreciate you!!! 👻💜✨
author's note: I hope this will offer the comfort you need <3
The Sound of Your Smile
Convincing Hitoshi Shinsou to sit with the Bakusquad at lunch wasn’t an easy feat. Not because he didn’t like them—he tolerated them more than most, in fact—but because their boisterous energy wasn’t exactly his scene. Still, after some gentle nudging, the promise of sitting next to you, and a few teasing bribes, you managed to coax him into it.
As you walked into the cafeteria, your hand firmly clasped in his, you could feel him sighing beside you. “Are you sure about this?” he muttered, his voice laced with skepticism.
“Hitoshi,” you said with a grin, squeezing his hand, “it’ll be fine. I promise. They’re not that bad.”
“Mm.” He didn’t look convinced, but he let you lead him anyway.
When you reached the table, the squad was already in full swing. Mina was dramatically recounting an event from earlier in the day, Kaminari was trying (and failing) to balance a fry on his nose, and Bakugo was scowling at Kirishima for some crime against his lunch.
“Y/N!” Mina’s face lit up when she saw you, and she waved you over enthusiastically. “Finally, you’re here! And you brought the boyfriend!”
“Wow, the man, the myth, the legend,” Kaminari added with a playful grin. “Shinsou’s actually joining us? Didn’t think we were his vibe.”
Shinsou gave a small smirk as you slid into a seat next to Kaminari, pulling him down beside you. “Don’t get used to it.”
The squad laughed, already jumping into their usual routine of playful banter and inside jokes. The air was loud and lively, but to you, it was just another day at lunch.
As always, you couldn’t help but laugh. Everything about your friends was funny—the way Mina overacted every story, the dumb puns Kaminari threw out, and even Bakugo’s sharp retorts that were more bark than bite. Your laugh rang out loud and clear, uncontainable as you leaned into the warmth of the group.
Hitoshi, for his part, watched quietly, his usual reserved demeanor softening whenever his gaze landed on you. He loved your laugh—how bright it was, how it lit up your face, how it was impossible not to smile when he heard it.
But not everyone shared that sentiment.
It started when a random student approached the table, someone you vaguely recognized from another class. They slid into an empty seat, uninvited, and gave a half-hearted wave to the group.
No one paid them much mind—until they opened their mouth.
“Geez, do you ever stop laughing?” they said, their tone dripping with mockery as they turned to you. “It’s kind of… annoying.”
The laughter at the table came to an abrupt halt.
Your smile froze, the heat rushing to your face as their words hit you like a slap. You opened your mouth to respond, but nothing came out.
Before you could process what was happening, Hitoshi spoke up.
“Excuse me?” His voice was calm—too calm.
The random student blinked, clearly unprepared for confrontation. “What? I’m just saying. It’s loud and distracting.”
Hitoshi leaned forward, resting his chin on his hand as his violet eyes locked onto theirs. His gaze was intense, his tone low and dangerous. “And what exactly gives you the right to comment on her laugh? Or anything about her, for that matter?”
“I—I didn’t mean anything by it,” they stammered, suddenly shrinking under his piercing stare.
“Didn’t mean anything by it?” Hitoshi repeated, his voice sharp. “You insulted her for laughing. For being happy. That says a lot more about you than it does about her.”
The random student shifted uncomfortably, glancing around the table as if looking for backup. But they wouldn’t find any here.
“Seriously, who invited this extra?” Bakugo growled, glaring daggers at the intruder.
“You’re lucky she’s too nice to tell you off herself,” Mina added, crossing her arms.
Kirishima nodded, his tone unusually serious. “Not cool, dude.”
Kaminari, ever the instigator, smirked. “You’re just mad because your own laugh probably sounds like a dying goat.”
The student flushed red, mumbling something incoherent before hastily getting up and leaving.
As soon as they were gone, the table erupted into cheers, Mina and Kaminari high-fiving while Kirishima clapped Shinsou on the back.
“Dude, you destroyed them,” Kaminari said with a grin.
“About time someone put a jerk like that in their place,” Mina added.
Shinsou, however, wasn’t paying attention to them. His focus was entirely on you.
“Are you okay?” he asked softly, his voice low enough that only you could hear.
You nodded quickly, but your forced smile didn’t fool him.
The rest of lunch passed in a blur. The Bakusquad did their best to cheer you up, throwing jokes and reassurances your way, but you couldn’t shake the sting of the random student’s words.
Later that evening, back in the dorms, Hitoshi found you sitting alone in a quiet corner.
“Hey,” he said, sitting beside you. “What’s going on?”
You sighed, fiddling with the hem of your sleeve. “It’s stupid,” you muttered.
“Try me.”
You hesitated, but the look in his eyes—so full of patience and care—made it impossible to hold back. “I know I laugh a lot,” you admitted. “And I know it’s loud, and sometimes it goes on too long, and it annoys people. I try to stop, but I just… can’t help it. And when they said that…” You trailed off, your voice cracking.
Hitoshi’s expression softened, and he reached out to take your hand.
“Y/N,” he said firmly, “don’t ever apologize for laughing. Your laugh is one of my favorite things about you. It’s loud because it’s real, and it’s long because you’re happy. And anyone who has a problem with that can deal with me.”
You blinked back tears, your heart swelling at his words. “You mean that?”
“Of course I mean it.” He cupped your cheek, his thumb brushing away a stray tear. “You bring light into every room you walk into. Your laugh makes everything better—it makes me better. Don’t let anyone take that away from you.”
A small smile tugged at your lips, and you leaned into his touch. “Thank you, Hitoshi.”
He smiled back, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead. “Anytime.”
And for the first time all day, you laughed. It wasn’t forced or hesitant—it was pure, unrestrained joy. Hitoshi’s smile widened as he pulled you into his arms, content to listen to the sound he loved more than anything.
Feel free to request <3
#mha shinso hitoshi#bnha shinso hitoshi#mha hitoshi#hitoshi shinso x reader#hitoshi x reader#hitoshi shinsou#mha shinsou#shinsou x reader#bnha shinsou#shinsou x you#mha x reader#my hero academia x reader#baku no hero academia x reader
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I wish I was cool enough to write this. Imagine a three part opener of parallel tales: Buffy's insane life with Glory and the Scoobies tracing her existence through increasingly rare and hard to translate occult texts. They have no idea what she's been through: just that she's called The Hand of Glory and Prophecy and some word that Giles says translates as both Sunlight and Lawbringer. When summoned or traveling by magic, she rises from bodies of water. The earth-residing descendants of Glory's home dimension now absolutely remember Her Majesty, the Lamb With Teeth, she who is knife and axe and open hand; they say that she is invoked to protect the most vulnerable, to pass judgement on the corrupt and the power mad, and to end wasteful bloodshed and excessive chaos in the realm. Her idols and devotional portraits show her cloaked in red and black, wrists heavy with chains, face hidden.
Instead of resurrecting Buffy, they forcibly summon Buffy back from Glory's home dimension. And by they, I mean Willow and Cordelia because I'm Coffy trash. And Dawn. Dawn helps. Do they account for "Buffy is 1200 year old demon warlord slash Murder Goddess now"?
They are certain they can handle it and also Willow modified the Ben/Glory imprisonment spell she's like 82% percent sure she can make Buffy normal-Buffy strong, not Badass Immortal Hellbitch strong, at least long enough to help her remember herself.
Instead of her affair with Spike, her ongoing secret from her friends and family is "I'm trying to figure out another dimension hopping spell. No, I'm not going back to my wife--my mistress--GLORY-- Bad Hair Slut. I'm not going back to Bad Hair Slut, I'm going Anywhere But Here. I'm gonna travel the multiverse until I'm happy, because Willow's spell did NOT work, I am very much still Prophecy."
Cordelia is very awkwardly trying to get close, get a picture of how her ex something is actually coping. "What was the restroom situation in YOUR hell dimension? And what kinda crazy bows did people do when you showed up? The bows were my favorite, at first. Got sick of them, quite frankly. Quit pressing your strange, unwashed forehead to my OBVIOUSLY expensive floors!" Buffy feels things she doesn't understand. A few hundred lifetimes ago, she'd said Glory reminded her of Cordelia, but she now realizes that while that IS true, that doesn't mean Cordelia reminds her of Glory. She doesn't. At all.
Willow and Tara can't stop rehashing this argument about bringing Buffy back like this. Tara is scared to say "Buffy could be dangerous"; Willow is more or less daring her to say it anyway. Dawn is furious and confused and weepy that Buffy is so, so different and so, so distant. Xander can't process that Willow told Cordelia and not him and keeps getting more and more hurt about it.
We still get Dark Willow. Glory does return, looking for Buffy, and Willow powers up to destroy her. She starts to get VERY carried away, ends up consuming several other magic users she knows in order to be strong enough. She and Buffy are originally fighting Glory together...until Willow leeches her down to OG Buffy Strength (and nearly kills her, tossing her aside before tearing Glory to pieces). She goes on a vengeance spree, and YES it eventually escalates into Lets Destroy The World.
Canon Divergent fic where instead of dying and going to Heaven, Buffy ends up in going to Glory's hell dimension and spends a thousand years as her sex slave/queen and when she gets rezzed in Season Six she's actually recovering from a really fucked up abduction.
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unconditionally
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#yuji itadori#megumi fushiguro#itafushi#fushiita#fanart#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#megumi#yuuji#im shaky and numb the way this took years off my life#genuinely cannot believe i thought it was smart to make it a comic i could have stuck at a painting and it would have been fine#but nooooooo in my hubris i thought Surely im an expert at this longform stuff now Surely i can do it :)#and then it killed me it killed me dead this is like over twice as long as the train comic and 4 times as detailed#backgrounds . angles. i yearn fr death.#AND I HAD 2 WRITE THEM ACTUALLY TALKING GGSDH i am actually so insecure abt the way the dialogue flows gomen....#i wanted to add more to it to fix how clipped and rushed i think it reads#but that would mean drawing more expressions would mean drawing more panels would mean more gd hyDRANGEAS#so ultimately i decided 2 have the conversation take the hit because let me tell u.#if i have to draw. one more blue petal i will snap i will lose it#i knew tht would happen n wanted to alleviate some of the pain so i found a few brushes that helped speed up the process#but the thing w a lot of premade flower brushes is they also come preshaded n look uniform in a way that stands out badly against my style#so i had 2 render over them anyway........#yuuji's domain rly putting me through the wringer first the train station now death by a bajillion petals smh#all that to say tho . my labour of love . i am going to take a nap#hina.comic
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Happy 1 year anniversary to Mr Sherlock Holmes! Here's a litttleee celebratory comic from me
#sherlock & co#sherlock and co#writing these tags on the 29th of september#which is when john and sherlock ACTUALLY met <3#so there you go#uh once again shout out to candy for letting me talk through some of my processes#it helps immensely and i really wanted to be sure i was getting across what i wanted to with this one#speaking of which - usually i yap a lot in the tags of these bcus i love talking about art#for this one...im not sure i want to comment too much#because i'll be here forever and i think most things can speak for themself#but let me say this one thing#for the first five pages i was drawing john on paper and sherlock on the computer exclusively#and then bringing them together..#uh it really made me think of paul and harry. recording on opposite sides of the world. brought together by the power of editing#its not a particularly emotional scene but i hope ive infused it with. something.#anyway thats it from me#if u want to ask about any particular aspect i would love to yap about the process but i'll just leave it here for now or i'll never shut u#happy 1 year podpals#patsart#oh yeah i will say i did have to take quite a bit of liberty with the audio in order to do what i wanted. forgive me#or dont idc
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PAGLUIB
way back in like. march?? I took a stab at writing some kind of kabitserye type of story but it was a mess: it kept veering off into murder mystery drama territory because I was reading a lot of murder mystery novels around then and it Wasn't Good because I hadn't tried writing mysteries, let alone murder mysteries, before lmao
I did write a handful of short mystery stories since then, so next year I might take a stab at this idea again now that I'm no longer jumping head first into a genre pool I don't know how to swim in :)
#now for the part where i have to fight off the impulse to write in some b movie horror elements because ive been thinking about#reanimator a lot lately. ehghghh. thank god for the editing process. to wrangle my thoughts into a linear state of creating#anyway i read an article. interview? on the popularity of infidelity dramas in the philippines and it was poetry to me#and i also enjoy the really intense social melodrama in lino brocka's films. specifically the appearance of morality to cover up/justify#ugly behavior. or like. man i'm tired. whatever was going on in murder by tsismis. that's the thing. someday i'll get more into it#and post excerpts from the actual analysis of the film that actually explains the dynamic im talking around here#komiks tag#original tag#also there's some. vague lingering thought about ikaw lamang in here. not in a way that matters#but in a 'the first episode that i saw was not the first episode of the drama itself and it made me go. oh everyone has rotten vibes'#which is not. well. if you saw ikaw lamang then you know the characters. this is not the takeaway from the show. HOWEVER#i did invent a whole different show in my head between that and when the next episode aired. so.#fake ikaw lamang. ikaw lamang if it wasn't even remotely like ikaw lamang. on the topic of ikaw lamang here's a cringe story for you#still following along. BEFORE i had watched the show. i saw a notebook with franco on it but i didn't recognize the character#i just saw jake in a suit and went oh! cool! i will now Buy This!#anyway i still have the notebook lmao
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working in a factory has you thinking so much about the insane chain of labor & transport that goes into making literally anything
#like first you realize that You are making & doing things that you previously had thought - if you'd thought abt it at all - were automated#& you become incredibly aware of how all the materials you're working with came from somewhere - these plastic clips are from france; this#fabric is from india etc. and that there are people in factories there making those things and that they are also probably getting their#materials from somewhere#one of the little things that makes me think about this the most is we have these 50m rolls of cotton banding we see onto canvas & nets#and in theory it should be all one piece but sometimes it's actually two pieces which you discover when you get far enough in the roll and#find that there's a join where it's been stitched together by hand (!). which is a little annoying bc we can't use that bit so you have#to cut that but out & stitch it together again on the machine which interrupts what you were sewing before & slows you down But it's so#striking to me bc like it's really easy to look at this banding & it's so exactly the same & obviously machine made it's Really easy to#forget that there are people there running these machines. who notice there's a break & have to stop what they're doing & get a needle &#thread and stitch it together. by hand! like someone somewhere has handled exactly where I'm touching it & i don't even know where in the#world they are!#the other place this happens is often on the selvedge edge of the fabric there's writing in pencil i don't know ye meaning of but evidently#was important to the process somewhere & someone wrote that out#idk like it's really easy to watch those videos of really specific machines in factories & convince yourself that everything is automated#but the truth is the vast majority of stuff is not & is made by people doing that. & even when it is there are people running those machine#<- and i'm not saying this in a soppy way tbc. this whole system is a nightmare of exploitation & to some degree I'm just continually amaze#by how insane this whole process is & also how completely un-transparent it is unless you are made to think abt it#another thing is noticeable when you look at our orders that most of what we sell isn't to customers it's to shops who then sell to custome#which then makes you think like. those plastic clips from france are they actually made in france or are we just buying them from france?#are they actually made by underpaid people in a country the name of which is completely lost to the chain of production at this point#anyways none of this is new it's just when you are working in a factory using this stuff you start wondering like.#what's the factory like that the person who stitched this banding together like. what's their day like there#wish we could talk abt how fucked up this all is - for them especially probably - together#thoughts
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heeyyy gaaanggg
the pose and the background of the album version (left) are based on oingo boingos only a lad album art. not cause i think he has anything to do with it but just cause ive been wantin to draw that pose for like. weeks and i didnt know who to put there. so why not my latest bug man.
#my art#digital art#digital painting#fanart#resident evil 7#ethan winters#goddd PLEAAASEEEE#i havent known if i was gonna post this or not multiple times in the process of drawin this. but ultimately i spent too much time on it to#NOT post it. embarrassment be damned#but at the same time what am i even doin yknow. what is this what is goin on pleaaseee PLEASEEEEE#I DONT KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT RESIDENT EVIL!!! I DONT KNOW N O T H I NG I KNOW LESS THAN NOTHING#HOW?? HOW DID I GET HERE??? WHY DID THIS HAPPEN???? i know exactly the answer to all those questions but it still boggles me how fast this#happened. usually it takes WEEKS if not MONTHS for me to start makin fanart. this was faaasttttt TOO FAST and im like. genuinely constantly#thinkin about this game. im ALWAYS thinkin about this game. part of why this took me so long to do is cause i always wanna play re7 or thin#about re7 in a strange and deranged way. ive actually genuinely been SICK WHAT HAPPENEDDDDDD#im losing it!! anyways this took me a looonggg ass time and i redrew it soo many timmmessss#i did like. 3 lineart passes. the album version i did 3 shading passes. i really struggled!! and ultimately i dont know how i feel about it#like i kinda resent it. for takin so long and makin me suffer so much#never again. never again will i spend that much time on a drawing. i HATE when drawins take a long time. i HATE that. it makes me madddd#ive been insane. ive been so insane. and im not gettin better like i cant sleep sometimes cause im thinkin about this game and this guy and#that gal like i think about them!! so! so much!! oh my god!!#in the time it took me to finish this ive done like 10 sketches for other pieces like. and ive had like 3 ideas ive written down.#and like 50 that i havent written or sketched.#IVE WRITTEN POETRY!! P O E T R Y !!!#i write the occasional poem when im feelin some kinda profound emotion but i NEVER write poetry about media SOBBING#anyways thats the post i think this is the beginnin of the end so lets hold hands and pray. ugh sorry if i get sick. im shakin.
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[ cw: risk taking behavior / circumstantial self harm kinda / ignoring of injuries / self-depreciation / slight ooc-ness but for a reason! / ]
Post invasion, Leo is fine.
More than fine! He’s better than before, even. That is, if you don’t count the slightly cracked shell and still healing bones, but those are only a problem when the weather wants them to be!
Leo really is better in the ways that matter.
He’s not as cocky, not as self-centered, and overall just more heroic in general if he does say so himself.
Raph even said he was proud of Leo!
So obviously things are going well.
But.
It’s not enough.
Leo’s better, sure, but he’s still got work to do.
So - and here’s something that will probably make his brothers faint on the spot - he needs to train.
_____
His brothers do not faint, but it’s a near thing for Raph. Mikey has to fan the snapper’s face and Donnie almost brings out the smelling salts before Raph shoots back to his feet with an excited grin.
Leo’s big brother gets teary eyed soon after and envelops him in a bear hug, saying once again how proud he is that Leo is growing up.
Leo lets himself be hugged, even hugs back as fiercely as he can, because unbeknownst to Raph, this marks the end of Leo’s childhood.
He lets himself be hugged like a kid one last time, looking through the hole in Raph’s shell all the while.
_____
Leo only trains the regular way with his brothers and occasionally April and the Caseys, but most especially Raph.
But of course that’s not enough, it was never going to be.
So he goes through the motions of the stretches, the spars, the meditation, and then he leaves.
He makes sure to have his excuses ready, usually defaulting to Hueso as his go to since his brothers are easily bought off with the promise of pizza. Leo hasn’t yet found the tracker Donnie installed in him, but when he does that’ll be dealt with too! But for now, this should be good.
See, the invasion made him realize something.
It’s not about him, but it was his shortcomings that led to everything going to hell.
So he just…needs to get rid of those shortcomings.
He’s working on it, gaining fighting skill in training, but there’s more he needs to do, more skills he needs to train.
Leo watches intently as Repo Mantis swindles someone, he memorizes the sleight of hand that Hypno performs, he sneaks back into the Mystic Library and is so quiet the hush bats forget he’s there, he talks Big Mama into honing his manipulation, and he even sneaks into human hospitals and reptile veterinary clinics to get a clue on more serious injuries.
And after any of these, he heads to Run of the Mill to compete in the Maze of Death.
_____
This is his twelfth time going through the (newly remodeled and even more deadly) Maze of Death, and would be his fifth time winning. The first three times had him waking up in Hueso’s office, and each time he wakes his old persona shines through.
He always waves off Hueso’s annoyance and questions and insists on trying again next time before he steals some pizza and bails.
The skeleton actively tries to stop him from entering the Maze after the first time, but hey- mystics are allowed before you enter.
It’s easy enough to teleport on by.
Harder to meet Hueso’s - and later his brothers’ - eyes when he fails again.
When he first actually won, Hueso congratulates him in that typical deadpan tone of his.
“Ah, felicidades, Pepino. Now you can move on, sí?”
“Hm? Nah, boneman! That run was sloppy!”
And then Leo runs off before Hueso can stop him.
He doesn’t even look at his picture on the champion wall when he next comes around. It’s not much to look at anyway.
_____
His second win is much like the first, and only his third win is actually acceptable.
But he knows the field too much now. He needs a challenge.
When he attempts to go through it blindfolded, he’s quickly shown how much he doesn’t know the Maze. So, obviously, he loses again.
He got a bit more banged up that time around.
“Pepino, basta ya, you’ve already won. Where are your brothers?”
“I can’t stop yet, señor! This is for my brothers - no les digas, please.”
Even if Hueso wanted to tell Leo’s brothers, they haven’t been in enough for him to get to, and it’s not like Hueso has their number since Leo’s the one Hueso usually contacts. For now, Leo’s safe to continue as is.
Though his injuries are getting harder to hide, and there’s only so much his shell in particular can take.
So to speed things up, he incorporates the blindfold into his regular training.
His brothers question it, of course, but hey, he initially got the idea from seeing Lou Jitsu do it in the third best Lou Jitsu movie, so it comes as a great excuse now.
He’s only a little put off by how fast Mikey adapts to it when the others try.
“I dunno-“ Mikey shrugs when asked, “You guys shine so brightly anyway, a mask doesn’t do much.”
Seeing their mystic energies is pretty cool, Leo can admit.
He just wishes he could grasp that himself - and that it was useful for a death maze.
_____
Leo’s training pulls off eventually, and soon, after a few more losses, he wins a forth time. But it’s a near loss, and a near loss is the difference between someone living and dying.
He’s gotta go again.
Hueso’s more insistent than ever, though.
“You must stop, Pepino.”
“But I can do better-“
“You don’t have to! Your shell is bleeding - ¡por tu propio bien, poner fin a esto!”
“I told you, this is for their own good! For everyone’s own good!”
He forgets the pizzas when he leaves. He claims sickness when he hides under his covers.
He ignores how childish the act makes him feel.
_____
Leo’s getting better, and his reflexes and tact in training shows this. His other training of his subterfuge and medical skills also prove to be useful.
He’s pretty good at hiding injuries, now! Though not so good at hiding a pained shell. Even Donnie looks at him with blatant concern (and understanding) when Leo can’t help but take a sharp breath whenever he lands on his back.
It’s hard not to go right back into waving everything off with jokes like he used to. Deflections are easier when they’re annoying!
But- this is just another reason that he needs to get better, right? So his brothers won’t worry. He doesn’t need the spotlight anymore - he’s over that, thanks.
He squashes down the part of him that perks up when Splinter says he’s growing up. He actively kills the part of himself that cries at the same phrase.
_____
So. Yeah. This’ll be his twelfth time running the Maze. And, hopefully, his fifth win. Maybe he really will move on after this.
The Hidden City is pretty big! There’s probably a bigger challenge somewhere.
Maybe Big Mama has a more secret Nexus hidden away, out of the public eye.
Well, whatever. That’s a future problem for him to figure out, yeah? For now, he carries on like usual, teleporting to the entrance of the Maze and diving right in.
Even blindfolded, he works his way through, dodging and weaving and feeling as he goes. He even tries to evoke his inner Mikey and calls on his mystic energy. Not enough to cheat, but enough to feel.
Usually, when Leo teleports, he swears he feels every part of himself disperse into particles. Now, with energy thrumming under his scales, he can feel particles everywhere.
It’s not refined enough to tell him everything, and he gets a fun new burn and a nice whack to the back by getting distracted. Still, it gives him more than he had before. It makes him more aware of everything, like he licked a finger and held it in the air to feel the direction of wind, but every direction blew wind, all in different ways.
He makes it to the end with minimal injuries after that, and sure, his shell is screaming at him now, but he thinks he did a shell of a good job.
…Ah, he needs to cut that out, huh? Man. Maybe Donnie’s collar idea was a good call after all.
Leo needs to be a hero. Not a face man. Not a failure.
Not a kid.
_____
Leo doesn’t smile when the Minotaur takes his picture again for the champion wall, and he doesn’t listen when she tells him to “go home and never come back.”
He doesn’t plan to, anyway, yeesh.
He’s tired as he trudges out of the exit, and Hueso catches him when he stumbles.
Hueso doesn’t say anything. Leo doesn’t either.
Or, he doesn’t, until he feels a familiar large hand helping him up as well.
Leo’s face whips up as he flinches back, eyes wide as they meet with a worried (so, so worried) Raph’s.
“You told them?” Leo asks Hueso in betrayal, heart thudding wildly in his chest.
“Pepino…”
“Told us what?” Mikey pipes up from behind Raph, coming closer to get a better look at Leo, “Leo, what’s going on?”
“Your shell has been having pretty big setbacks on its healing, is this why?” Donnie demands, glaring fiercely as he motions toward the Maze.
Leo feels unmoored. “I-“
“Leo.” Raph interrupts, and no Leo doesn’t want to hear it- “Are you okay?”
And Leo wants to say “it’s not about me”. He wants to say anything that proved he learned his lesson, that he’s not a liability or worse, an active danger to his own family.
He wants Raph to continue being proud of him. He wants his brothers to trust him.
Instead, he passes out.
_____
The next time his eyes open, Leo’s on his side, staring at his blue lava lamp.
He knows without looking that his shell is re-bandaged. He knows his other injuries have been dealt with too.
And unless Leo learned how to do some pretty impressive medical sleepwalking, he knows he’s not getting away this time.
All three of his brothers being in his room prove that.
“What’s been going on, Leo?” Mikey asks, and his voice cracks partway through.
He’s looking at Leo like he’s searching for something, but Leo doesn’t have anything to show. Nothing’s hidden, he just did some light spring cleaning is all, throwing out all the parts he didn’t need.
All the parts they didn’t need.
And yet despite everything, he can feel himself falling back into old ways, a grin tugging at his beak and lackadaisical deflection on the tip of his tongue.
Maybe he should let that part of him show, just for once. It wouldn’t seem like too much of a setback would it? And he could really use a fun pun right about now-
No.
No it’s not about him. He needs to remember why he did all this in the first place.
“Okay- sorry, guys.” He smiles, softly, quietly, “I guess I got too caught up in training. I’ll work at it some more, don’t worry.”
“Oh, I see. Training. That’s all it was, huh? Training.” Donnie hisses more than says, nearly vibrating in anger.
“…yeah?” Leo nods slowly, because, uh, that’s literally the most honest thing he said. It was training.
“If it’s just “training” then why the secrecy, hm? Why in Curie’s good name did you prefer to sneak around rather than, oh, I don’t know, tell your family?”
Leo feels his shoulders rise at Donnie’s aggression, defensiveness welling up in him, “It was my training! Nothing went wrong, I’m getting better!”
“Better?” Raph asks incredulously, “Leo, you’re wasting away. A tap to the shell stuns you for minutes, you lost weight, and your dark circles are worse than Raph’s ever seen them! You aren’t getting better-!”
“YES I AM!”
The words rip out of Leo before he can stop them.
The room is silent as his brother look at him, all wearing expressions of hurt that Leo put there again.
“Yes I am.” Leo reiterates, shaking, “Because- if I’m not-“ He squeezes his eyes shut. “If I’m not-“
Then what was all this for?
Arms slowly wrap around him, and he knows now from the feel of the mystic that it’s Mikey.
“You’ve gotten faster, and sneakier.” Mikey says quietly. “When I accidentally cut my hand, you knew exactly how to take care of it.” His voice grows firm, and he backs out of the hug, “But those are your skills. You, though, you’ve been…you’ve been…”
“You’ve been dilapidating before our very eyes, and trying to hide it.” Donnie finishes, jaw tight. “You think we wouldn’t notice? After everything?” To Leo’s horror, Donnie’s voice is hoarse with tears, “You absolute dumb dumb.”
“I- but I need to train. The Maze is-“
“Leo, we don’t care that you ran through the Maze. We care you did it alone.” Raph says quietly. “We could have joined you, any time.”
“But- but I’m doing this for you-“
“Listen to your brothers, Blue.” They jump as a new voice joins the fray, heads turning to see Splinter make his way into the - frankly crowded - room.
“Dad, I-“ Leo begins, but trails off, suddenly more unsure than ever in the face of his father.
“It’s good you’re finally picking up training! Especially for your brothers’ sakes! But there’s such a thing as going overboard, you know.” Splinter pokes a sharp claw into Leo’s plastron, “Just because you’re dragging it out this time, doesn’t make this any less of a sacrifice. My son, you’ve taken after Karai an awful lot, haven’t you?”
Leo just looks at his father. At his brothers. Then, he looks down at his calloused hands, bandaged and scarred from overuse.
He swallows dryly. “Is that a bad thing?”
He feels his family crowd in around him, feels his father’s hand on his shoulder.
“It’s not wrong to want to be better, Leonardo.” Splinter says, softly and with so much grief and guilt that Leo can never begin to understand, “But you were never bad to begin with.”
Leo’s breath hitches.
“And-” Splinter’s hands rise up to frame Leo’s face. “You are much too young to ever consider sacrifice the best answer.”
“You got me to relax, Leo. So I’ll do the same for you.” Raph grins, eyes wet, “We’re still kids, right?”
And-
Leo smiles, watery but genuine. “Yeah, Raph. We are.”
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt leo#rottmnt headcanons#rise leo#rise fanfic#WHOOPS#did not mean to write all this#my only regret is not including April#anyway I was like wow Leo sure is acting different at the end of the movie huh#then I thought hey he’s actually acting a lot like previous iterations of Leo rn#then I ran with it and tripped down the stairs in the process#thus this was born!#I am tired so more tags later#but dang oops a bit too angsty gotta do smth lighthearted soon huh#also yes he DOES go back and apologize for putting Hueso through so much#he gets a smack on the head and a head pat immediately after#‘don’t do it again Pepino - not until I finally get the Maze shut down’ ‘okay wait what-‘
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The Housecat Philosophy - Ep 37
Ep 00 || < Prev || Next >
Read the next four episodes on Patreon || support me on ko-fi~✨
#the housecat philosophy#artists on tumblr#original comic#webcomic#original art#my sketches#ah i love writing sal and lu in the same place#can't wait to get deeper into them they have probably the most ridiculous relationship i've ever made up#anyway as a psa#i was actually hoping to post this one with an announcement that the comic was finally on webtoon but!!#the process of prepping it for the site is turning out to be surprisingly long ????#apparently my meant to be read top to bottom comic is too meant to be read top to bottom for the read top to bottom site#i've drawn panels that were nearly too long for the max length allowed by the site hahaha........#wow cropping strip 38 is gonna be a nightmare#ANYWAY just to let you all know im working on it#who would have thought letting 37 strips pile up would mean having 37x the work to do not me that's for sure#i absolutely did not call this upon myself in no way whatsoever
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just thinking about trent having an embarrassing twitter account that's like, idk, priv and/or just like an anonymous jokey account sort of thing and it regularly tweets things like "The weighted blanket is not enough. i need a man to lay on top of me horizontally and crush me to death. lovingly." and "Just made finger guns at my crush instead of doing what I intended to do, which was apologize. I think maybe I should be shot into the sun?" and "Sorry for being rude. I got anxious and scared. It will happen again" and "'Not all men' you're right. Ted Lasso would never do this to me" <- everyone assumes that's a general celebrity crush/just a joke about a famously really nice guy and like, coach beard actually likes/retweets it so it goes mildly viral and trent is like. This Is Fine. most people assume that this account is run by like, a female tumblr user in her late twenties. no. this is a middle-aged single father and no one realizes this until he tweets something like "My ex-wife just set me up with a man who looks exactly like my straight crush, but worse. You know, because she's evil, and also the funniest person alive. anyway guess who i ran into on the date" or "i am a single middle-aged father and i only JUST NOW found out i have autism. My parents knew when I was three." which is then updated by "WHAT DO YOU MEAN MY EX WIFE KNEW TOO" (she thought it was kind of a given) only to confuse them again when he mentions that time he was pregnant
#and then someone from work discovers it's him and is like TRENT???? TRENT CRIMM???#im picturing this is like late s1 to post canon and it just gets increasingly... something. like there is a process occurring#trent crimm#tedependent#actually way funnier but also way more embarrassing to the point i literally couldnt write it out of sheer secondhand embarrassment#is crack scenario wherein trent running some fucking hornyposting ted lasso account#picturing this started as an extremely drunk ''''''joke'''''''' where he created it (pfp is a blurry photo of him in the press room that#NO. trent did NOT take. and it has a rainbow filter) and then was like#'[picture of ted with his sleeves rolled up or smth] i wan t him to get mre pregnan t'#and then people thought it was really funny and also got several 'same brother' replies etc and now trent's in hell.#at least no one knwos it's him!!!! 🙃#ANYWAY back to the first scenario just think its very funny he accidentally becomes#a hashtag relatable meme funnyman or whatever and it's anonymous so no one knows it's Trent Crimm Middle-Aged Journalist#ALSO TRANS TRENT CRIMM LIKE ALL MY POSTS SUCKERS!!!#gertspeak
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VARGASTOBER - day 1 : memories
#vargastober#vargastober2024#HELLLO#HELLO HELLO IM EUPHORIC . GOD#it ended up looking even better than i expected !!!!! hhhell yeah !!!!!!!!#i'm like LOOK GUYS ( pointing at the screen ( I MADE THIS#i had to work on this one yesterday actually#i won't be home today . so i had to make sure i could actually get this one posted on time#it's currently 3:40AM . this will be posted idk at 1PM#i need to write a whole entry of the process but i didn't take any screenshots of it . great#i banged this one like in 5 hours . LIMITED TIME#NO TIME TO TAKE SCREENSHOTS OR WRITE NOTES#anyway don't want to talk too much here . I ENJOYED WORKING ON THIS ONE#vargas#scriabin vargas#vargas zarla#scriabin#zarla s#sunny's art#I HAVE A BUNCH OF EDGAR / JAKE DOODLES AND I DON'T KNOW IF I WANT TO POST THEM RIGHT NOW#two posts in a day is that too much#i'll save them for later . maybe i can make more in the meantime
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Trainer Bakugou who you're a little terrified of the first day you're paired with him. when asking for a trainer at the gym, you had expected the friendly redhead who always looked so sweet and encouraging and cut as hell. you weren't expecting his grumpy looking blond counterpart, who was all glares and shouts for his clients to keep pushing themselves.
you were hesitant at first, before you quickly realized that it was all a ruse, for the most part. he pushed those who needed that extra encouragement, but was more lenient to people like you who simply wanted a professionals guidance. so, after a few weeks, you liked him for the most part, and his looks damn sure made it easier to cozy up to the big guy.
the only issue you've been having with Bakugou though are the...coregasms, as you've seen them been named on social media, that you keep experiencing. the first time, you weren't sure what it was, why your stomach and pelvis kept tightening up. you couldn't have...climaxed, or anything. you hadn't even been touched!
but, as the weeks go by, and the workouts get more strenuous, they've become harder and harder to subside and ignore, and so had Bakugou's commands to keep going when you suddenly stopped. you can only lie and say its cramps so many times before he realizes that something is up.
you're midway through a good morning, when that familiar feeling starts tightening in the pit of your gut. you clench your eyes shut, shaking your head a little, as if you could ward off the impending feeling. bakugou notices though, frowning at your almost pained expression in the mirror, walking up behind you to stop you as you pull yourself back up. his hands are on your waist, and as you come up, you feel his bulge glide over the curve of your ass, and something in you snaps.
you gasp, buckling over, one hand on your knee as the other reaches back for bakugou's hand to keep you up as your thighs shake. you can feel yourself spasming, clenching and unclenching around nothing, secretly wishing you had something that could fill you up, something that you felt throb against you as bakugou leaned over your form.
"Another coregasm, huh?" he asks you lowly, his lips brushing your ear as you bite your bottom lip to hold back your moan. your eyes buck open though, when his words sink in, head tipping back to look at him in the mirror, only to find his gaze already on you.
"You knew every time?" you ask quietly, panting now that its finally starting to pass over you. but bakugou doesn't let you up from this position, especially since the area you're in seems to be desolate for now.
"It's hard to ignore how pretty you look when you cum, sweetheart." Bakugou seals his words with a firm press to your ass, his cock rubbing the seam, and you can practically feel the heat and veins of it through your thin bottoms. you groan under your breath, getting lost in the feeling of him grinding against you, when he suddenly speaks again.
"You still feel it?" he asks, voice low as he looks at you through his lashes. you nod, biting at your bottom lip as you meet the steady rock of his hips, watching how he smiles before slotting his lips against your ear.
"Want me to help make it go away?" and he does, in the employee locker room after hours. he makes it go away, and rebuild, and go away again and again until you're hoarse and your legs are weaker than they typically are on leg day. bakugou helps the ache go away, but not for that sweet redheaded coworker of his, whose fists have fucked his cock the entire time of watching bakugou rail you over the locker room bench again and again.
#remember when I said in my lion bkg tags that I would write that long fic#sorry but I lied 😔#idk its been so hard to write long fics for me lately!!#I thought it would be better since the brunt of everything in my life has passed#but the creative energy isn't all the way there yet#so I won't rush the process of it!!! when I let it come to me I typically bang out like#3-5 fics in two weeks lol so im waiting for that feeling#but anyway!!! I love trainer character aus they're so seggsy#also I had to throw in eiji sorry what else could I have done#NOT put him in this somehow???? I don't think so#okay bye im gonna write another Drabble ive had in my drafts for a few weeks now LOL#—new treat in the streets! 🍫#bakugou treats! 🍬#also has anyone ever actually experienced a coregasm before??? I saw it on insta and was amazed LOL#I need to start working on my core more to get one lol if im LUCKY
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I know this is just a silly bad quality random screencap of a screencap that I found on facebook lol, BUT it's a succinct enough image to easily describe the concept in a quick/accessible way hopefully :
-
(and of course, feel free to elaborate in tags, etc.! (especially elaborating about other senses as well.. can you "hear" in your mind just as well as you can "see"? taste? etc.) It's an interesting topic to me, as someone who's like a 4.5 at MOST lol. I'm curious what option will be the most common :0c )
#tumblr polls#hrmm... a little poll perhaps.. about a subject I find interesting.. since this image came across my facebook today#still really not feeling that well. no longer shaking violently and such but I still feel weird and weak much more than usual#They did say my markers for like infection or inflammation were elevated but that they werent sure of the cause so hopefully#it's nothing too serious. they did also say a lot of different things can cause that thing to be higher than normal but didn't go into spec#fics of what. maybe some of them are relatively benign or something. I still havent felt much back to normal since#I got really sick that one time though. I feel fine on and off but then little bouts of feeling weird and sick happen. hrmmm#ANYWAY.. looking for small ways to be productive. such as little doodles on evil ipad or editing game videos#or posting polls or cat pictures or some other like not very labor intensive things#I WISH I COULD FOCUS on writing HHRGGhh... I need to finish my game.. it would be so freeing.. a project that's been looming#over my head for like 5 years even though througouht that 5yrs I've probably spent a total of 3 months working on it lo.. ANYWAY#I still partially really cannot beleive that people CAN see stuff in their heads. There's always part of me that's thinking like. well mayb#e everyone DOES see the same exact thing but we just describe/conceptualize it so differently that we think we're talking about#different things when we're really not. But I have been assured by people I've talked to about it that they can GENUINELY really see#stuff in their heads like as vivid as an actual picture in real life or something. And the other senses are neat too. Like for exmaple I#can hear in my head much better than I can see imagery. I still CANNOT hear vividly like as if I were listening to actual music out loud..#but I think it's developed more than my sight. AND interesting how this varies the creative process. a friend I was talking to on the phone#said they write by literally just watching stuff play before them like a movie. where my process is COMPLETELY different. AND that affects#the content/what details we focus on as well as our individual styles of writing have differences that can be traced back to that.. hrmm
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we talk all the time about how those characters would NOT be having well negotiated kinky sex, but i think of all the mxtx couples moshang would really benefit from a beginners course in bdsm or at the very least they should read a manuel and draw up a contract, like given their history, their communication styles, and their dynamic at the end of the novel, it would be a net positive for them
#im not say thing that they ARE i am saying that they SHOULD#i also this were they to do this#there is a high likelihood that they’d actually stick to it#like i think clearly stating boundaries and establishing safe words would obvs help#but also like i think sqh is genuinely fine with mbj roughing him up they just need it in writing that it’s like#fine now and that they’re both on board#so yeah i think they’d try it and they’d never go back they’re basically already in a D/s relationship in canon it’s just not negotiated#for the record i also think bingqiu would benefit greatly from the same classes + contract#but there’s no way sqq would sit thru the embarrassing process (it’s not embarrassing he just has a face of tissue paper)#and afterwards it wouldn’t matter bc they wouldn’t stick to it anyway (sqq’s fault mostly…)#anyways#svsss#moshang#shang qinghua#mobei jun
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come to me
His relief at seeing her is tangible, primal, as he quietly insists he’s just tired – the relentless intensity over the last week, or two, or even dear gods has it really been three finally easing up. Although maybe, in its own way, that easing was part of the problem.
He says it’ll pass soon; he knows there’s no hiding it but he’s hoping that’s the truth, and the last thing he wants is to worry her.
He doesn’t quite succeed.
With a frown of concern, she watches him take his coat off, an unspoken exhaustion laced through his movement as he increases the hearthfire’s intensity, and she passes him the steaming cup of jasmine tea she’d made for herself only moments ago. He gratefully accepts its welcome small warmth with a soft thanks, love, and she doesn’t miss the edge of congestion in his consonants, nor the dullness in his usually intensely vibrant eyes, the encroaching hints of pinkness to his nose.
They take a seat together on the couch and he puts the teacup on the table, apologises to her for all his absences lately, sniffles at first softly then harder, sharper. At his catch of breath she passes him a tissue, and quickly another, as his expression crumbles in surrender to the recurrent insistent need he’s been unable to shake: urgent, unforgiving and imperative, the vestiges of his energy rip-torn ravaged as he hurriedly turns from his beloved, unable to fight it, sneezing in urgent, violent triplicate – heavy, throat-tearing, disorienting.
Her heartwarm blessing is a cherished sanctuary as she trails gentle fingers through his hair, drawing him closer, and oh she always loves his touch but he’s far too warm, the thickness in his breathing impossible to miss. She murmurs soothing softnesses, presses a lingering kiss to his forehead, and holds him a little closer as
“Ahh-HEHHTSShhuu!”
she’s not sure about this passing soon at all.
---
#a completely random snapshot of my darlings because that's where my brain fixated right now for some reason despite WIPs in waiting?#absolutely yes#my ocs incognito#cerbia#snz fic#anyway so my writing process is the world's stupidest thing; i should know how it works by now but i really have NFI#me in the bath: mmm going to bed after this!#me once dry: you need to write this scene! YES now!#half past midnight. perfect time for it.😅#so anyway i am doing an absolute rarity and posting this without my usual overnight wait-and-make-sure edit process#here's hoping there's no glaring upfuckeries lol#(he's actually really sick here; he just doesn't fully know it yet)
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