#but i only really know the vibes of it and absolutely not the spelling

[screechingsandwichhologram]

AUGGHHHHHH !!!!! HAVING LANGUAGE ISSUES !!!!!!

my grandmother calls my mom and also me sometimes this one word. it sounds like it would be spelt "pit" but i'd wager its not that. i don't know what exactly it means and i don't know how to spell it but its french canadian and is a term of endearment. help.

[louscartridge]

HIII omg youre like the only active person writing for Henry Danger and i would like to request dating headcanons with Henry!! (x female reader please!)

A/N- omg no fr it makes me so upset that there's so little fanfics (especially good ones💀) for the danger verse😭

CW- ngl these are kinda halfassed and writen on like 3 hours of sleep, not proof read (only spell checked), physical touch, the L bomb, angst, death, and suggestive if you do the squintiest squint, thats it??

❥ his love language is physical touch and words of affirmation. fight me.

❥ hes gives kinda golden retriever bf vibes, but not like overly or whatever yk??

❥i feel like for your first date, he might want to try hard and do something nice or whatever, especially if you guys weren't friends before hand, but he prefers to just stay home with you and hang out.

❥ i feel like he said 'i love you' first tbh.

you were in (yet another) life or death situation, and he was like kinda panicking. he was getting annoyed with how slow shwoz was working to try and save you or whatever, and he started ranting and somewhere in the rant he ended up saying he loves to, however you heard him say it.

once you were very much so alive and ok, you said it back to him.

❥you'll never miss the chance to sleepover at henrys house. ever. even if you guys have had an argument that same day, or the day before. then however, instead of sleeping in the same bed as him, you'll sleep on the couch that up in the corner of his room.

❥ at first piper definitely tells you that you can do better 💀

❥ you know about his past minor loyalty issues, but he quickly gains absolutely all of your trust once he finds out that you were overthinking it.

❥jasper lowkey be your hype man ngl

❥i wouldn't necessarily say that gift giving is one of his love languages, but if its yours or you want something, hell have absolutely no issue in getting you whatever it is.

❥ when you guys first started dating, you would sneak through his window at night all the time, or after school. one time tho, henrys dad ended up catching you. surprisingly tho, he wasent really upset. he was just like "omg this is awesome this is like the most 'rebellious' teenage activity we've ever gotten out of him" and after stifly waving at you he just walked away.

❥ henry stutters alot when you make him nervous. (which by the way is quite easy to do)

❥ he pays attention to the little stuff just as much as you do tbh.

❥ i feel like he'd make forts with you 😭 he likes making them at night tho, cause then they have less of a chance of getting ruined by his sister. plus, then you guys can go to sleep in them.

❥ catches your hand from a high five so you end up holding hands.

❥ whenever he get jealous, for the most part hes chill. he knows you'll be good on your own, but hell keep a close eye out just incase.

❥ hes pretty protective tho. once again, he knows you can handle yourself, but sometimes people are so rude to you and it makes him mad. however, he tries to keep his composure for everyone sake, and embarrassment.

❥ i feel like hed want to play with your hair?? like you guys would be laying so your back was facing him, and you just feel him start to play with your hair. you could tell he started to attempt to braid it. "henry stop you're gonna make it all tangled" "you want me to make it all tangled?"

[lunavrse]

WHAT YOU HEARD pt 2

LANDO NORRIS

summary ★ : streets are saying yn finally broke up with her loser boyfriend and guess who couldn't be happier? if you guessed lando, you'd be wrong, it's actually her (but lando's a really close second).

category ★ : smau.

notes ★ : as always times and dates are irrelevant and spelling mistakes are intentional. longer than the last part but worse 🫶. and when i use those harry styles and taylor russell pictures again, mind your business🤫 poll at the end!!!

pt 1

tagged: visavni

Liked by landonorris, monaspencer, zendaya and 1 154 748 others

yn_ln back to your regularly scheduled content of my face 🤗 did a fun little shoot with with a friend

View all 4 755 comments

user ugh face cardddd

user it's giving retro realness

user ur face card rlly is sum serious

visavni this was sm fun!

yn_ln thank u for always delivering

user always something amazing when y'all collab

user 1st slide is giving scream for some reason

user real "please don't kill me Mr Ghostface, I want to be in the sequel" vibes

user serving 70s editorial

user Already added to my Pinterest board 💞

user gagged, died, dead

user And I eat it up everytime.

landonorris real

user ofc instagram user landonorris on a yn_ln post

user not even f1 driver💀

user seeing different concepts from you is my absolute fav thing ngl

landonorris you look leng.

user anyone else side eye at this comment?

user honestly? not really, i'm sure he's said worse things

user legs are legging...

user what does this even mean

user the girls that get it, get it💋

user gah dam why are you legs so long🤤

user she's so overrated

user now why are you manspreading 🤨 do you want people to sit in ur lap???

user me wondering if that seats taken

monaspencer you've done it again! it's giving everything it's supposed to give🔥

yn_ln tysm ml🫶🏾

landonorris so she gets a reply but not me🫤

yn_ln now what was i supposed to say?

landonorris thank you?

yn_ln you're welcome.

landonorris oh that's no- ykw, you're right, i should be grateful

user damn right

user if he's not like this i don't want him

user He really said when a bad bitch tells me to shut up, I do it.

user i just know that ezra is somewhere sick to his stomach

user personally, I'd never recover

zendaya your shoots are always so good

yn_ln tysm queen. means a lot coming from you<3

user girl you do damage to me🥴

user amazing shoot 😍

yourfriend7 slenderman proportions🤩

yn_ln and if i kill myself, what then?

yourfriend7 😘

yn_ln spawning in your room🔜

yourfriend7 not beating the allegations pookie

user 😭😭😭

user love seeing your face pop up when i open insta

user the only reason people care about you is bc of ezra

user you're joking...

user you're delusional just like ur fav

user and yet here you are, on her page

tagged: landonorris, yn_ln

motormouth Lando and Y/n spotted out and about via friends and fans. New wag or just friends hanging out? Let us know what you think!

Liked by user, user, user and others

View all 854 comments

user tagging them is so messy.

user well it is a gossip page

user but still... the audacity

user man like lando norris yeah

user friends can't hang out?

user The way that one picture looks really romantic until you realise Mona's cropped out

user Ezra was right to dump her😒 She never deserved him and she's mid anyway. Never did and never will get the hype.

user stacy why aren't you watching your kids instead of commenting on things that don't concern you? user yeah stacy, why aren't you being a mom to your kids? user stacy is a man who, instead of paying attention to the kids he only gets to see certain times, is out here dick riding someone who doesn't know he exists. user damn, someone named a baby boy stacy? user Well, my mom wanted to be Stacy's Mom but only decided on having one kid, and unluckily for me, I was that kid user born in 2003, named stacy and has kidS (multiple!), yeah, no wonder he's on a gossip page instead of watching those kids.

user he really wasted no time

user i hope he knows he's probably a rebound

user the way y'all purposely hid the fact that mona was also there in the 3rd slide 😐

user this the type of timing i need to be on

user i just know that one twitter user is laughing rn

user she's just using him😕

user he's so weird for this, like she just recently got out of her relationship and now this??

user love the fact that they get to hang out more

user It's still too soon since her last relationship, so I'm thinking they're only friends.

user she probably broke up with ezra just to be with lando 🤢

user did she or Ezra tell you that? no? yeah, shut up

user and who would blame her? NO ONE

user mona erasure, i will not stand for this!

user the way he's looking at her😵

user fellas is it weird to hang out with your friends?

user only if your friends are the opposite sex, it seems

user they're probably laughing at this (if they even see it)

user i just know lando is giggling

user fr, like dating rumours with her?

user mans is kicking his feet

ezragallagher has uploaded to their story.

user: what you over here being messy for ???

user: bro move on!!!

user: i support you, toxic king🙌

user: ezra, baby, you can do better

sashabardot: really ezra? what the actual fuck is wrong with you

user: bros going through it

user: this is kinda pathetic don't you think?

user: someone's paying attention to their ex

user: babes this isn't your cf

user: don't you have work to focus on?

user: the way this would make me get back with you

user: ☕☕☕

user: this feels targeted

user if only i had half the confidence and audacity that you did🙂‍↔️

user: this is an... interesting song choice

user: see, me personally, i would never show my face on the internet but you do you💪

user: better as in you?

user: hope you guys get back together 🤞

user: God, I see how you've given some people the courage of lions😂

user: might as well have tagged her

user: just how i like my men... toxic and pettty 😍 *pretty but petty works just as well

user:

yn_ln has added to their story.

user: uhhhhh

user: is this what i think it is?

user: oh!

user: please tell me this is in response to ezra

user: beabadoobee mention!!!

user: I love this song.

user: the way fucking batman wouldn't be able to get this out of me

user: this is wild

user: stop being so cryptic! is this about ezra or not

monaspencer: messy asf😭

yn_ln: he started it, so idgaf also, it could've been worse

monaspencer: true, you could've posted to still your best

yn_ln: lmaooo, can you imagine💀💀

user: taste>>>

user: have you ever thought that maybe you were doing something wrong if he cheated on you?

user: oh no

yourfriend: do you ever wonder...

yn_ln: YOU'RE FUCKING SICK😭😭😭

user: You know what you're implying w this right?

user: publicizing the fact that you've been cheated on is insane

user: ezra fucking gallagher, count your days.

user: ok i alr know this is about ezra but who is the girl???

user: are you not embarrassed?

user: 🤨

user: ik you guys dated and everything but he wouldn't cheat🙄 you're just making up lies to slander him

tagged: lukacyr, yn_ln, landonorris and 3 others.

Liked by lukacyr, yn_ln, landonorris and others

monaspencer spent some time with some of my favourite people... and lando

View all 1 787 comments

user you and luka are so 🥺

lukacyr that's my baby!!!

monaspencer 🩷🩷🩷

user dare i say... couple's trip???

yn_ln hot girl alert!!!

monaspencer love youuu

user lando catching strays?

lukacyr so gorgeous, im so lucky🩵

monaspencer i love you pretty boy🩷

user wish i was that cat

landonorris and lando? damn i thought we were besties😔

lukacyr we all know she loves you

monaspencer 🤥

landonorris thanks luka, knew i could count on you for the truth❗

user wait, whose cat is that?

user love how they're all just living their best lives.

user oof uno w yn and luka? I just know there was lots of yelling

user them making up their own rules and frustrating those of us who play the game properly 😭

lukacyr sorry you guys are boring 😔

user ughhhh miss spencer you are looking teww damn foineee 🤤

user sprinted to this post when i got the notification

user mona + yn = the prettiest friends. ughhh, love them

user you and Luka make me feel so single and im in a relationship!!!

user that's -

user just smile and wave

user game night is back baby!!!

user adding the song to my playlist immediately

user slayyy

lilymhe can't wait for the next dinner!

monaspencer you and alex are hosting nexts babes

yn_ln i have a meeting that night

landonorris me too

lilymhe alex will be cooking

yn_ln i will be in attendance

lilymhe hey! i'm not that bad

lukacyr sureeee

alex_albon you are not talking, mr i once set fire to water

user how tf

user i love tht Luka buys her flowers whenever he can

user i have so many questions

user do you and Luka want a third?

user 🔥🔥🔥

user your nails in the first slide is everything to me

user not mona and yn having matching rings,,, i love them😭😭

user very on brand for them

user they all look so cool, I wish i was apart of their friend group

user real, they all look like so much fun

user TV girl>>>

user face beat is so FAB imo

user wait what's happening to me... 🧍‍♂️🚶‍♂️🧎‍♂️🐈🐾

user the dress from the last slide is EVERYTHING

Liked by monaspencer, landonorris, lilymhe and others

yn_ln 1st slide is me after thirdwheeling my (girl)friend and her boyfriend 😴 and the last slide is literally them, I'm sick😞

View all 1 853 comments

user girlll

user this said so much and nothing at all

user how can someone be so cute and hot at the same time???

monaspencer ik you're not talking lol

user what does this meannn

lilymhe i would never treat you like that bbg

landonorris don't you have a boyfriend? matter of fact ﹫alex_albon come get your girl

lilymhe snitch😒

alex_albon lily???

maxfewtrell dinner was great, sending mine and p's thanks again

yn_ln tell her she needs to join us for game night next time and you're invited too ig

maxfewtrell im starting to think you like my girlfriend more than me

yn_ln i do!

maxfewtrell fairs, i like her more than you

user last slide unlocked a memory

lukacyr and proud of it

lukacyr you're just mad she likes me more

yn_ln thats so funny considering she's in my bed rn

landonorris should've been me

user I jus know Lando took that 5th photo

user and you know this how...

user idrk but you can always tell when he's the one taking her pictures bc something about it just makes her look.. especially stunning ya know? like you can tell someone who's in love w her took the pic

user you're actually so right

landonorris a whole slide of just me? yeahhh you want me so bad

user i aspire to be this type of delusional

yn_ln oh absolutely

landonorris so glad you're admitting it to the world😌

user i cannae tell if this is sarcasm or not

user it's ok, neither can lando

user in the words of one troye sivan, "face card, no cash, no credit"

user when he sang "look, look at you", he meant her

user and when he sang " baby, I'm first in place" he was singing about Lando

user swear i saw you guys at that restaurant but was too nervous to make sure

user i would have said hello ngl

user i didnt want to disturb and like i said, i was so nervous.

user have i mentioned that i love everything that is happening here, bc i do

user genuinely thought the 2nd slide was y'all eating sushi and was amazed that you got lando to eat it

user same! but i didn't even question it and just scrolled

user would honestly be flattered if i was compared to arnaz and breanna, they were such a cute couple

user true but i still can't get over the fact that her dad was called Flex lmao

user eye cant get over the shows theme song, like i still think it's good

user not to mention Breanna was in her fashion bag, girlie was serving LOOKS.

user Check out my profile for art of your favourite artist's favourite artist!

user omg that's crazy haha, i have 10 lambo's btw, like i am super rich and you'd never be tired around me bc i'd make sure you get 10 hours of sleep (2 extra hours bc you deserve it, must be exhausting being so gorgeous)

landonorris this person literally set fire to my house and is stealing from their job. please report them so i can have some peace of mind🙏🙏

user YOOO, this is NOT TRUE, NOBODY REPORT ME FSTHSNTH

user idk man, why would Lando lie :/

landonorris exactly, for what reason?

user ik this is a lie but imma do it anyway lmao

landonorris why would i lie?

user bffr.

user: i know we're all focused on yn's beauty(and rightfully so) but can we take a moment to appreciate that picture of lando???

user: like hello, he looks so hot

user 💖

user LIVING it up

landonorris: you ever see someone so beautiful you start barking violently? cause thats me rn

landonorris: got me acting unwise❗

yn_ln: please calm down you freak

landonorris: mmm call me a freak again😩

user: what the

user: he's so real for this

user: jesus h christ

user: think i've had enough of instagram today, peace out✌

landonorris has added to their story.

user: mona's miss steal your girl well not really your girl🤣

landonorris: blocked

user: i want someone to look at me like that

user the art in the background is so pretty

user: damn, you're never making it to relationship status

user: she's wearing orange... interesting...

user: art and art/two masterpieces in one photo

user: guess i need to ask Mona and Yn if they want a third instead

user: i'd say deserved 🤷

monaspencer: you're both such liars

user: waitt,, the fits are eatinggg

user: they literally look like they're in love

user: women *sighs dreamily*

yn_ln: damn, i look good wait when did you take this picture

landonorris: yeah you do. orange is really your colour, you should wear it more often

monaspencer has added to their story.

user: not them getting "this you"-d💀

user: they are never beating the dating allegations

user: exposed in a single photo

user: you're an absolute legend for this

user: this just in, yn ln is a LIAR!!

user: i don't know why you're friends with her🙄

yn_ln: you make my ass itch

monaspencer: funny, i was thinking the same thing about you

yn_ln: why do you do this to me?

monaspencer: suffer x

user: my otp!!!

user: ugh, what a eyesore(i'm violently jealous)

user: They look so good together, they should just date already smh.

user: now it definitely seems like y'all went on a couple's trip👀

landonorris: send me this🙏🏻

whatyouhe4rd has posted a new article, based on your likes, this may interest you. check it out?

landonorris has uploaded a story.

user replied to your story: you're jokinggg, this is a joke

user replied to your story: you didn't actually post this, im clearly just seeing things im just gonna pretend that it didn't happen since you deleted it

user replied to your story: When I tell you I burst out laughing seeing this, I'm not lying.

maxfewtrell replied to your Close Friends story : you did not delete the 1st one just to post it on your CF

landonorris: it was an accident?

maxfewtrell: an accident that's going to end up on hundred's of gossip sites

landonorris: rachel is going to kill me, isnt she?

maxfewtrell: seriously surprised she hasn't already

yn_ln replied to your Close Friends story : Rachel is going to kill you

landonorris: i just told max the same thing, we're soul mates fr

yn_ln: i'm being serious

landonorris: so am i but did it make you smile?

yn_ln: yes?

landonorris: then it was worth it and i'll die happy

yn_ln: you're so cheesy🙄

landonorris for you i will be mozzarella, parmesan, chedda, gouda, brie, cottage, feta, swiss, burrata, cream, etc.

user replied to your story: this is iconic, lando norris, my fav malewife

randomfriend replied to your Close Friends story : i think you've been on tiktok too much

charles_leclerc replied to your Close Friends story : your head must be a fascinating place to be in, how do you do it?

landonorris: my brother in christ and racing, you can not be talking

user replied to your story: you're so right and you should say it

user replied to your story: Sometimes we don't have to share what's on our mind with the world

user replied to your story: I'm fucking creasing

⤷ end note ‧ ★ : heyyyy, how y'all doing🧍... sorry for the wait, i really did have most of this done and in my drafts but then writer's block hit and i left it for a while. also, i kinda suck at making articles lmao. thank you to everyone who reads and/or interacts with my smaus, ily<3.

taggingᯓ★ : @firelily-mimi and @appl3-0rchard

[littlejuicebox]

Milk.

Back again for the third time today, this time with some porn with a plot.

I'm really on one with the Dadstarion fics. Something has been unleashed inside me, people.

I need to edit all these headers at some point.

Warnings: babies, angst w comfort, smut, nipple play, breast milk, breast milk drinking, breeding kink, daddy kink, teasing, dirty talk, a bit of soft dom Astarion vibes, 18+ only please

A/N: Most of you already know I'm a degenerate.

-----

Astarion had been uncharacteristically melancholy this week.

Sure, it wasn’t unusual to witness him in one of his moods of irritation or frustration, particularly when some business deal or another was not going particularly well, or a contract he’d already drafted more times than he could count came back to him with more rebuttals.

But to witness this cloud of sadness around your husband, especially after Gale’s birth, was odd. He’d been the picture of domestic joy and fatherhood, completely over the moon in his new role. He even wore the sleeplessness better than you in the first few months, happy to assist where he could so that his little love could get more valuable rest.

However, just recently, his mood had become detached and distant. Everything he did and said seemed tinged with worry or sadness. It reminded you of the spawn version of Astarion from several years ago, almost always caught in a poor memory or concerning line of thought. That version of Astarion hadn’t shown up in a while. You couldn’t be sure what triggered it.

“Gale’s getting quite good at holding his head up,” You inform your husband as you crawl into bed with him after just putting the three-month-old down for the evening.

“That’s wonderful news, darling.” Astarion replies, with that same distant, pensive air he’s addressed you with all week as he focuses on the book in his lap.

You sigh, and put your hand over the book, obscuring the pages and forcing the elf to acknowledge you, “What is it, Astarion? You’ve been in this… mood all week and I’m beginning to worry you’re regretting parenthood.”

Your husband’s eyebrows crinkle as he places the book on his nightstand, staring at you with a mixture of shock, hurt and confusion, “Darling, do you truly think that? What have I done besides absolutely dote on Gale? And on you!”

You realize you’ve misspoken. You see the wounds on your husband’s face as he assesses you, and your hands come to his cheeks, searching his eyes, “No, no I didn’t mean it like that. I’m sorry. I know you don’t regret Gale… I just. I’m worried, Astarion. You seem… sad. Lost in thought in a way I haven’t seen in years and… I don’t know why.”

There is a moment of silence as Astarion’s eyes flash through several thoughts, filtering through a week's worth of garbled noise within his mind. And then he sighs, “I…” he pauses and blinks, forcing himself to meet your gaze, “I’m worried that I won’t be the right masculine role model for Gale. That I’m not strong enough to show him… to show him how to be a good man.”

Your mouth falls open in shock. You cannot even think of something to say, because this certainly wasn’t the direction you thought Astarion would take. He was always quite self-assured in his talents and never hesitant to be the true version of himself after the parasite fiasco over a decade ago.

He continues, “I don’t live in the woods, or whatever it is exactly Halsin does. I’m not an especially talented spell caster like Gale. And I’m fair with a blade but it’s been years since I’ve had use for one and I don’t have the level of training nor regular practice like Wyll nowadays, dear. I review contracts and make investments; I run the winery. I embroider. I’m not exactly the picture of masculinity in comparison to… others.”

There is a moment of quiet between the two of you. Concerned tears form in your husband’s eyes, which he quickly blinks away.

“Astarion… you are the strongest man I know.” You murmur, running a finger along the elf’s cheek as he scoffs and shakes his head. His eyes jerk away from your face; clearly, he does not believe you.

You gasp in shock as you cup his face harder, willing the elf to understand how serious you are. You continue, vehemently, “My love. You cannot seriously believe otherwise! You have endured more than any of us could ever imagine. Over 200 years of… horrible atrocities. And then you came out on the other side of that, after having sacrificed so much — and Astarion, do not ever forget how much you willingly sacrificed — to be better. To choose differently. To be so much more.”

You are ripping the blankets away and crawling into your husband’s lap now, wrapping your limbs around his torso. His head comes to the side of your neck as you hold him, hoping to convey the love and respect you have for the elf with the warmth of your arms. Your fingers latch into the curls on the back of his neck as you speak in a reverent whisper, urging him to believe you.

“I watched you endure years without the sun in more stride than I could have possibly thought. And you are perhaps softer than you were when we met, yes. But this version of you gives me and Gale everything we need and more. I cannot imagine someone stronger or more courageous than you, my love. And I think you have forgotten how much strength it took for you to become this soft in the first place. I love this version of you. And Gale has a wonderful, loving, strong father in this version. Please do not ever doubt that.”

A quiet hum of acknowledgement comes from your husband, but no other words escape him as he lifts his head from the crook of your neck and envelopes your lips in a soft kiss. A thank you.

Your heart is pounding from the passion with which you spoke, and when Astarion’s lips press into yours, that passion and love begins to flow throughout your body. Pieces of you start to wake.

It had been a while since you two were intimate. Not since before Gale's birth. Days and nights had recently been filled with parenthood and left little time nor energy for much else. But as Astarion pushes forward, wrapping his arms around your back, you feel the stirrings of desire deep in your core. A soft moan leaves you as a fire begins to grow where mere glowing embers had been left several months ago.

Astarion must be feeling the same pull, because his hand trails from your back and sneaks under your nightdress to brush along your thigh. He slowly traces up the length of your leg to cup your bottom while he deepens the kiss with a soft, breathy moan of his own. He’s flexing his hips up toward you, the growing bulge in his trousers begging for further stimulation. Your lover’s tongue swipes along your lower lip, asking for entry, and your mouth opens to accept the swirling heat of desire from the elf.

He explores your mouth and caresses your bottom for a while, tenderly, slowly, and in no rush to further things along despite the mutual growing desire between your two bodies. It’s you that finally breaks the kiss before ripping your night dress over your head, exposing two heavy, milk-laden breasts in the process. Astarion brings the hand not kneading into your ass to cup your breast before thumbing the pert nipple.

You gasp, and your husband’s brows crinkle for a moment as he pauses his ministrations.

“Too sensitive?” He asks, pressing a soft kiss to the top of your other breast.

“No, keep going,” You urge him, closing your eyes and rolling your hips forward to grind into his groin. He bucks forward to meet you instinctively.

He tentatively thumbs the nipple again and you moan in response. Without thinking much about it, Astarion brings his mouth to the other breast and wraps his lips around the bud before sucking gently. You release an ecstatic keen in response when his teeth graze against the tender flesh. You are continuing to roll your hips into him when he suddenly retracts from your chest with a shocked gasp.

Your eyes snap open, and you catch the final glimpse of your husband wiping breast milk from the side of his mouth as his cheeks and ears slowly turn pink. And then you feel your own embarrassment growing as rosy patches flush across your chest and cheeks. You quickly move to cover your breasts.

“I-I’m sorry,” You whisper, “it slipped my mind. I forgot about the…”

You’re thinking the moment’s ruined, and moving to climb off your husband, but he quietly brings his hand to your waist and stills you. His eyes search yours silently for a moment, and you’re still so consumed by your own embarrassment that all you can do is stare dumbly back at him, eyebrows furrowed.

But then Astarion lifts one of his hands to your own, slowly lowering it from where it had been covering your breast. He keeps his eyes locked on yours as he once again leans forward and wraps his lips around the nipple, sucking gently. Warm milk flows into his mouth and you inhale sharply, unable to look away as your husband removes his lips from your breast, opens his mouth to show you the white liquid, and then closes his mouth and swallows.

He swallows.

And then he smirks up at you with a self-satisfied, mischievous glint in his eyes that causes the slickness between your legs to instantly double.

Gods, this man.

You are convinced your entire body is flushing red at this point as Astarion slowly brings his other hand up to palm the flesh of your breast.

“Would you like daddy to do it again?” He purrs before his tongue laps circles around the side of your heavy tit.

“I— gods, yes.” You respond, blinking down at the elf.

“Okay. But you have to ask me very, very nicely, little love.” He responds teasingly as he trails kisses to your other breast, waiting for you to say something.

“Please suck my nipple,” You whisper, eagerly rolling your groin into your husband's raging erection.

But Astarion doesn’t do what he’s asked. Instead, he’s teasing the bud with the flat of his tongue and humming contentedly, waiting for something from you.

“Please suck my nipple, daddy.” You amend, and the elf instantly engages his lips around your other breast with a soft groan. He’s drinking with vigor as your hands find the curls at the nape of his neck and take hold. Before long he’s retracting again, his mouth full of liquid gold.

And he pulls the same maneuver. Mouth open, flashing the white liquid as he looks directly into your eyes. Mouth closed. Swallow. Devious smile.

“It’s delicious, you know.” He murmurs as you stare at him, still in shock and still somewhat embarrassed by the fact that you are actually enjoying this. His hands come to either breast, both now significantly lighter, and he fondles the soft tissue.

“You shouldn’t be so surprised that you like this darling, I distinctly remember a time when I made you orgasm by mere nipple play alone.” He whispers, a glint of that cocky rogue playing across his face before he trails kisses up your chest and along your neck.

“Gods, Astarion,” You respond, “I need you inside me, now.”

You’re done with the foreplay. Your husband has you ridiculously hot and bothered, and it’s been far, far too long. You're on your knees, which are straddled on either side of his hips as you urgently tug at the waistband of his trousers, trying to work his pants and underclothes off in one motion. But your husband is purposely resisting and refusing to lift his hips, watching you with that same arrogant smile.

Oh, he's toying with you.

“Darling, why am I always the one dirty talking you?” He asks, pulling back from your neck and cocking his head just slightly as he studies your face.

“I— what?” You ask, still pulling insistently at his waistband.

“I’m always the one charming the pants off of you, dear. In over ten years, it’s never really been the other way around. But you know that I love to hear your beautiful words.” He continues, moving one of his hands to stroke between your still-clothed folds.

“Astarion, please fuck me.” You try as you struggle to keep your composure. The slickness of your cunt is making obscene noises as he expertly maneuvers between your slit, watching your expression attentively as you come undone.

He chuckles darkly as he brings his lips to your breast once again, trailing kisses along the side of the flesh, “I think you can do better than that, my love.”

You groan in dismay as the bastard continues to tease you. Several months without sex and somehow you’re still the desperate one while he’s effortlessly maintaining his cool.

“What do you want daddy to do to you, darling?” He purrs, teasingly, as his other hand that isn’t stroking between your legs trails across your skin to fondle your ass once again.

“I want you to fuck me and fill me with your seed.” You whine as his ministrations on your clit become more insistent. You’re trying to play into his desires, to convince him to stretch you open with his thick cock.

Your legs are trembling now. He’s going to make you come embarrassingly fast. You know it. He knows it.

“Won’t you beg me, my love?” He murmurs as his eyes trail across your chest, admiring your larger-than-usual breasts before his gaze locks back onto yours, fingers still strumming your clit, now adding more pressure, “You know I love to hear your sweet little pleas.”

“Please— Astarion. Please, daddy. Please fuck me. Breed me like your good little wife and fill me with—“

You gasp and then moan as your orgasm rips through you with little warning, drenching your husband’s hand in your arousal. The release causes your legs to turn into jelly, and Astarion uses the opportunity to quickly maneuver you into a new position. You are sitting on the side of the bed, and he is now standing, quickly lowering his trousers.

His cock springs free, and the sight causes your eyes to widen in shock. It’s so engorged that the head is slowly turning from that gorgeous pink to a deep purple, begging for release. Thin rivulets of pre-cum are falling in strings from the tip; much of his shaft is glistening from the same evidence of his arousal.

Astarion glances down at his own erection and then warns, “It’s been a while darling, not quite certain how long I will last.”

“Just get inside me already, daddy.” You plead and that’s enough to make your husband growl as he strokes his own member once, twice, prepping himself. He peels your drenched undergarments down your legs and tosses them aside.

As Astarion’s cock slides between your folds you gasp. Gods, it really has been too long. And then he’s pressing into you slowly, groaning deeply with the amount of effort it’s taking him to not release his spend right upon entry into your tight cunt. When he reaches the hilt, the elf stills for a moment and lowers himself down to kiss your lips before pressing his forehead against yours. And then Astarion is slowly rolling his hips, his mouth hanging open in a gasp at the delicious sensation of your walls clenching around him before he closes his eyes to focus.

It isn’t long before he's losing control. Your husband normally prides himself on being a consummate lover; it’s quite typical that he brings you to orgasm twice before finding his own release. But it has been quite some time and perhaps holding off in an attempt to hear your pleas wasn’t as easy for him as it appeared on the outside.

“Gods, darling. You feel so perfect.” The elf pants, almost breathless, his hips stuttering as he jerkily thrusts into you, trying and failing to maintain some rhythm as the pleasure overwhelms him, “So perfectly wet and tight.”

“Come inside me, daddy.” You whisper as you bring your hand to the side of Astarion’s face.

The command shocks him. Like you, he’s suddenly coming with very little warning. His eyes rip open as he’s spilling into you with a loud groan, his cock jerking inside your walls where he’s instinctively buried himself to the hilt.

“Fuck-- gods, Tav--" He hisses through the waves of pleasure racking his body as his eyes roll back. His thighs are trembling as his member continues to throb, spilling several streams of hot, thick seed into you as you watch his face in awe. Mouth agape, cheeks flushed. You love the way he looks when he loses control.

You smile and kiss your husband gently as he comes down from his high, your hand stroking his cheek. And then he’s laughing and pressing his forehead back against yours. A few of his curls fall haphazardly and you reach up to lovingly comb them back into place.

“You are… still full of surprises, aren’t you?” Astarion asks as he slowly withdraws from you, causing the slickness from your lovemaking to run down your thighs and into the sheets.

“I thought you would like it,” You offer shyly, now somewhat embarrassed at your own crassness as the tides of passion recede.

“Oh, I certainly did, darling.” Your lover reassures you as he bends down to retrieve his trousers from the floor, "You cheeky little degenerate."

Just then, Gale lets out a sharp cry from the nursery. You move to stand up, but your husband stops you with a gentle hand and a soft, adoring smile.

“I’ll go and get him. Don’t waste the seed still inside you, dear. Give it a few more precious moments to try and do its thing, hm?” Astarion says, partly teasing and partly serious as he shoots you a wink before heading out the bedroom door to retrieve the infant.

This one won’t take, you know as much. You aren’t ovulating. But as you watch the love of your life exit the room on his way to retrieve the other love of your life, you think you may actually be ready to start trying for another one sometime soon. You know Astarion is simply waiting for your cue.

Anything for daddy. 

[olderthannetfic]

Now I'm wondering how countries like Japan and China teach literacy.

Since kanji / hanzi don't really have that much in the way of phonetic elements, they kinda have to teach them by memorization and I don't think they have many reading comprehension problems over there.

(Although both countries do have supplementary phonetic writing systems in the form of bopomofo and pinyin for China, and the kanas for Japan)

--

FAVORITE SOAPBOX TOPIC UNLOCKED!

RELEASE THE KRAKEN!

It's a little closer to teaching vocabulary than spelling, but the same kinds of principles apply: You teach the building blocks, like the traditional radicals, which aren't so different from teaching Latin and Greek roots in an English class for English speakers.

And, as a matter of fact, lots of those radicals do predict pronunciation, just not in every single case. They can also be clues to meaning, but again, not absolutely consistently. Many characters have a sound-cueing radical on one side and a meaning-cueing radical on the other. It's just that only some are still useful in the modern day, while others are more like the English word 'plumbing' where knowledge of Roman lead pipes explains why this word comes from the one for lead, but the root probably wouldn't help a kid learn the word in the first place.

One similarity to teaching phonics would be teaching students to tell very complicated and similar characters apart: you want to help a student spot all the little building blocks of the character and then spot the ones that are different, not just glance at the whole character and get a general overall vibe. If you do a whole look-based approach, too many characters are too easy to mistake for one another.

Remembering a bajillion Chinese characters is hard if you're trying to memorize them in a year and not all of elementary school, but I think people who don't read them underestimate how many component parts there are and how approachable they can be if you start by learning fundamentals, not just memorizing a few individual characters as though they have no relation to anything else.

They're actually pretty systematic, just in the way that English spelling is with its overlapping systems and historical artifacts, not in the way that highly regular Spanish spelling is.

Having taken a lot of Japanese classes, I will say that Japanese as a foreign language textbooks often do a piss poor job of this and totally do teach kanji in a sight words-y way... But my Mandarin class started with important foundational concepts that served me well in Japanese later even if I bombed out of Chinese class at the time.

Can you tell how irritated I am by all the foreign language learners who think characters are sooooo hard when, really, it's just their crappy textbook? Haha.

They're moderately hard in the way that learning a full adult spectrum of vocabulary is hard, but people do that for foreign languages all the time. The countries that use characters do tend to make sets that are smaller for certain kinds of applications, same as we have things like simple English wikipedia, but a literate adult will always know lots more, whether it's from their career in engineering or their predilection for historical romance novels.

Uh... anyway, the answer is "Bit by bit in elementary school, just like in any other country".

[jamiepaige]

Constant Companions Closeup #2: NOT QUITE THERE

(also on spotify!)

b-b-back once again

Round two of the Constant Companions Closeups - a series of in-depth dives into the songs off of my latest album, Constant Companions! Yesterday was track one, Dyad - today is track two, Not Quite There, featuring the incomparable telebasher!

This one's a bit of a dark horse relative to the rest of the album, but it may very well be my personal favorite song on the entire thing so dammit let's Yap

---

For the uninitiated, this song pulls heavily from a song off my previous album called Gummyworm, both in vibe and by very directly quoting its synth motif.

Both of these songs deal with two sides of the same emotional coin. I actually don't want to go into too much detail about it - I feel like the lyrics spell things out clearly enough - but I will say this:

When it's all you know, it's easy to believe that a love that isolates you, a love that doesn't respect you, a love that hurts is better than no love at all.

You deserve better. There are always people who genuinely want what's best for you, who want you to feel truly loved. It certainly isn't always easy - it's genuinely good if your interpersonal relationships have a little friction sometimes - but love should make your life brighter.

You deserve a love that's fair.

---

The original version of this song was actually intended to be on Bittersweet alongside Gummyworm. The original concept for that album had a whole heady concept involving duality, songs reflecting each other, the two halves basically being reprisals of each other... Ultimately, I'm glad I scrapped that idea, because it was waaaaaay too much for me to manage after a couple years of barely making music. Maybe I'll revisit it someday though?

The drums on this song are sampled from an Instagram post by Louis Cole, where he's doing this crazy one-handed hi-hat blast by holding a drumstick sideways. I'm a drummer and that shit genuinely scares me a little like i dont know how he does half the things he does its fucked BUT. I bring this up because he's one of my biggest inspirations as a musician! I'm really big on jazz in general, in case my love for spicy chords wasn't enough of an indication, but his specific brand of freaky hyperactive bullshit just does it for me.

Seriously, go watch his band KNOWER play their song Overtime. Absolutely insane performances across the board. also Clown Core

This whole song is really just my attempt at matching some of that hectic jazzy energy with my own style of music, so I figured it only made sense to make it another collab with another musician making delightfully frantic jazz bullshit - the legend herself, telebasher! I really am such a massive fan of her work, and I struggle to think of anyone who plays guitar quite like she does. We previously worked together on another Bittersweet track, Asemic Speech, and her guitar work is a major reason why that song is still one of my favorite I've ever released!! She's just built different like listen to this oh my god!!!!

Lastly, since this song was one of the first written for this entire project... it is admittedly a case of me shoehorning the album's leitmotif in after the fact. It's a little forced when it shows up in the backing vocals! But, the choir of vocal synths during the guitar solo served an additional purpose - my own voice doesn't show up on the album again for another four entire songs, and this would've otherwise been the only song on the entire album that didn't feature any vocal synths. Thus did I attempt to bridge the gap, as it were. Hopefully it makes the final product feel more natural!!

Either way, that's all for today's post.... i think.... which means that tomorrow.... we're gonna rot.... for clout

[darkmagenugget]

Hiya! I'm Ashe! One of the main fronters of the DarkMage Nugget System, runner of of this account, and main artist! Fennec kitsune/shapeshifter as well. (She/Her) Welcome to the DarkMage Nugget Tumblr!

Creator of Hyper City (With extra lore from friends and Aqua) where a lot of my friends stories are taking place. You can find my commission info here and are open! I do character art, emotes, and more!

System Intros after the break!

Allow me to introduce the rest of the system.

Iris- (She/Her)

Iris is the host of the system. She has her own blog here ( @iristhedarkwitch - 18+ only). She is the witch of our system, and also the current host. Specializing in transformation spells fictionally, and energy manipulation in practice. One of my girlfriends as well. And Aqua's girlfriend too.

Aqua - (She/They)

Aqua is the writer of our system. Also has a blog of their own over here ( @nuggetofthesea ). She is an elf with (currently) 3 forms. A base, a sea, and a shadow form. She is the one responsible for most of the lore in Hyper City, and is usually the calmest of us and just loves hanging out by vibing in the room. Also girlfriend. Also dating Iris.

Chaos- (She/Her)

Chaos is a gremlin. Is always interested in things that are high-energy and fast paced. She plays games on stream on fridays at 4:00 PM Pacific. She is also the most direct of us (Though speaks a little rough) and able to put things bluntly and deal with scenarios we wouldn't be able to otherwise. She can by hyper, but cares greatly for everyone in the system. Usually spending time with Aria.

Mira - (She/They)

Mira is the organizer of the headspace. A crystal fairy who is able to duplicate herself up to up to 30 of her at once, she manages the entire headspace and the thoughts and memories of system members. Keeping the memory archive as a collective reference for us to go back to. They do tend to be able to handle multitasking better than the rest of us, but tends to stay out of the front unless she is needed (or wants to troll us, because when she enters the front we all see what she sees. All 30 of what she sees at once). She keeps everything organized.

Aria - (She/Her)

Aria is a puppy. She's just a big strong puppy. She is the sweetest person in existence. She can't really communicate well verbally or over text. But can communicate through images, emotes, barking, and through me or Chaos. Would protect anyone physically if needed, but we try to not have that be needed. She is too sweet! If she shows up, give her headpats. She absolutely loves them. ^-^

Nova - (They/It/Fae)

A trickster fae that has found its way into our system. Rarely calls anyone by name, and speaking with a scottish Accent, they are playful and tricky. But likes to fly free. Bound to it's "Little Fox" (me) in terms of willing to listen her, but will chime in at any time it wants. So if I ever speak with a scottish accent, that's Nova.

And just some more examples of my character design work. These aren't part of the system (As far as I know) but are still characters I use often.

[smallnico]

durge desensitizes to casual positive affection and friendship compilation

also known as real feline durge hours. esper's companions look at them and say Is Anyone Gonna Manhandle That Murderous Twink and then not wait for an answer. contexts/explanations under readmore for the curious

lae'zel and esper do morning exercises and meditation together. most of the time they pass the time in silence, but sometimes they're joined by the local wildlife. esper is a great fan of showing their friends things they might find interesting as a form of affection instead of words, especially with lae'zel, since they have a common discomfort with small talk.

esper doesn't like looking at themself in the mirror, so their makeup is always ancient and haphazardly applied, a fact that distresses the more image-conscientious shadowheart. she and esper have a sibling-like relationship fuelled by mutual amnesia and goth solidarity, among other things, but sometimes a sister has to take it upon herself to fix her stinky sibling's wings.

i already expanded on wyll and esper's dynamic a bit in this piece and i didn't feel like drawing the same thing twice, but suffice it to say, they have absolutely no idea how to talk to each other, but still look out for each other. the joke here is about how i've done a couple of long rests in-game with just alcohol i've found. hey 5 camp supplies is 5 camp supplies

jaheira unearths esper's forgotten mother issues. no real things to add here. no thoughts only cub.

gale said way back in act 1 that esper reminded him of tara, and esper isn't leaning into that on purpose per se, but as i said for lae'zel, they like getting their friends things those friends might enjoy. they also love chaos. show your evocation wizard some love by bringing him extremely destructive spells to play with. show your durge some love by casting chain lightning and letting them watch

i have no justification for this one lmao. esper isn't a Huge fan of being picked up and hefted around like a sack of oats, but maybe they should've thought of that before being small and scoop-uppable. socially, esper and halsin don't click especially well, but esper is fundamentally a creature, and therefore pretty easy for halsin to understand. obviously they don't mind that much :J

esper and karlach voted two most touch-starved nerds in faerun, they help each other cope by sleeping in a cuddle pile like cats. karlach runs warm even after getting her engine tuned up, but esper doesn't mind. she's cozy

astarion is by far the person esper is the most verbal with, probably because he's the only one who really thinks the durgeisms that slip out are funny and #relatable. everyone else errs on the side of caution with esper, but astarion knows he's allowed to take liberties with them, and he does. they have the same sense of humour. these two freaks are completely insufferable together because they're vibing so hard on a level incomprehensible to everyone around them, but astarion can put a stop to esper's self-destructive internal stress engine, and esper can drag him into helping and working hard. the others have no choice but to tolerate them as a couple because no matter how unhinged they are as a unit, they're so much worse for society on the whole as individuals. do not separate them

if you read all this, hope you enjoyed this illumination of esper's party dynamics, i love you <3 enjoy

[forgeofthenine]

Curious about a classic trope. Loved one hides and injury! Maybe s/o got injured and hid it away because they were too worried about Dammon/Zevlor/Rolan? How would the bachelor trio react to finding out their loved on hid an injury?

Thanks for requesting this one Anon, it was very fun to write <3

The bachelors when their partner hides an injury

Dammon

Believe it or not, despite being caught up in his work Dammon is actually very observant

As soon as you walk past him in the forge trying to hide a limp he's already downing his tools and scooping you up

Absolutely carries you inside and sets you down on a chair, the type to kneel in front of you and ask what happened

Dammon listens to everything you say as he rolls up your pant leg and checks your ankle/foot for injuries

Lets out little hums as he wraps it up to keep it stable

I hope you weren't expecting to walk by yourself while still hurt, that's just not happening

You can also expect a heart to heart with him another day where Dammon asks exactly why you wanted to hide the injury

He's honestly so good at communication, this man is husband material

Once he understands where you're coming from the two of you definitely talk things out, ending with Dammon pulling you onto his lap and giving you a kiss

Zevlor

He takes one look at you and just knows

Do you really think this man hasn't tried to hide his fair share of injuries?

Zevlor is breaking out the med kit right away

He's so experienced with emergency and small injury treatment from being a hellrider that he's got you patched up in no time

Doesn't matter if it's a cut, scrape, sprain, or particularly large bruise

Insists you take at least a couple days to rest and recover in bed, even just for his own peace of mind at this point

Another man that will ask why you wanted to hide it, he gives the vibes that he'd ask over dinner

Zevlors honestly so understanding, holds your hand the whole time you two are speaking

Absolutely tells you how he feels about everything too and it ends up being a very productive conversation

You'll notice that Zevlor holds you just a little bit tighter at nights for the next week or two

Rolan

Takes the longest out of all of the bachelors, but he still notices quicker than a normal person

He's so used to Cal and Lia hiding minor injuries from him that he knows what to look for

It's a great excuse for him to break out the new healing spell he's learnt, just sit still for a moment and you'll feel much better

In the moment he seems very unbothered, proud of his work even, but later you notice something is off

It's only when the two of you are snuggled up in bed, Rolan wrapping you up tight in his arms, that he brings up what's on his mind

Even if the injury was only minor, it does make his mind dwell on why you'd keep something like that from him

Please just reassure him that you didn't want to worry him, and he'll feel much better if you promise to tell him about future injuries

Expect at least a few kisses from him that night

If you go up to him a few weeks later with a paper cut Rolan will heal it with a spell while playfully acting like it's lifesaving treatment

[sapphicseasapphire]

Chain as Cryptids au: Huggability

My back hurts, have some comfort! Characters are ranked by who gives the best hugs to the worst hugs, and a little bit of an explanation!

(Under the cut because long)

1. Sky

Do I really need to explain myself? He’s Sky. He’s the softest, sweetest, most cuddly hero to ever exist and we love him for that. He’s kind of known for taking a random hero into his arms, wrapping his mighty wings around them, and then flopping onto the ground and falling asleep. He’s just. So soft. His wings? So warm. Every hero- even Legend, who’s pretty touch averse- would kill to be wrapped up in his crimson feathers. (Eh, except maybe Time. At first). He has a knack for finding whichever Link needs a hug the most and seeking them out.

2. Twilight:

This guy? Is extremely gentle. He’s so incredibly strong but also so incredibly soft. His Hylian hugs are second only to Sky’s, but he also had the added bonus of being a Shapeshifter! One moment, he’s got a Link all wrapped up in his arms and the next, he’s a purring cat on their lap. A wolf wrapped protectively around them. Warm and cuddly and always so careful. Gotta love Twilight.

3. Suprisingly (?), Legend:

Legend’s pretty touch averse most of the time. But when people need him, he’s there. He has so much love in his heart that he keeps bottled up. He has experience, and he has a knack for reading people. He knows exactly what they need.

4. Wind:

Little big brother. He’s surprisingly good at comforting the others and when he wants to be, he’s biggest cuddle bug in the world (second only to Sky, I guess haha). He’s really good at curling up and holding on tight, and he definitely 100% uses his younger age to his advantage. You wouldn’t tell the child to let go, right? You wouldn’t tell the child to get up. Even though, in reality, he’s comforting them more than they’re comforting him. He lets them think that they’re being the strong ones- it’s his little trick haha.

5. Hyrule:

Little guy. His hugs are always warm and gentle since he’s absolutely buzzing with magic. Fairy magic is inherently healing, so even if he’s not actively casting spells, the others are affected by his Good Vibes when they hug him! Having a bad day? Not anymore, Hyrule won’t let it happen. (Disclaimer: when he’s in his True Form, the two inch tall fairy, it isn’t wise for the others to try to hug him. Unless they’re Four and are also two inches tall.)

6. Ravio:

TOUCH STARVED BABY!!! GIVE HIM A HUG!!! Ravio is so eager to be affectionate haha! He kind of jumps directly on top of Legend like all the time, and when be hugs people, be squeezes them tightly as if he’s making up for lost time. While this is comforting to some, it might catch others off guard. I think he should be tied with Hyrule and Four but that’s not how these things work haha.

7. Four:

Four’s hugs are good hugs! They would be higher up on the list if it weren’t for their horns getting in the way. Sky’s go-to move is to rest his chin on peoples’ heads when he cuddles, but the top of Four’s head is deadly. Because they’re shorter than almost everyone in the Chain, the horns will get in the way. It’s no problem! The others can work around them! But they are gonna knock them down a few points. Sorry, Four.

8. Time:

This man. This God. Is so incredibly bad at being social. He’s awkward and not very good at reading social cues. And that’s not because he’s not mortal, it’s because he was raised by a tree. He’s not sure when it’s appropriate to hug the other Links (he’s more confident with Malon and his children), so he just tends to leave them alone. His philosophy, in this and in everything, is that if he gives them space, they’ll eventually come to him. That’s… not always correct. His hugs have great potential- he’s big and gentle- but he can’t give good hugs if he doesn’t give hugs.

9. Wild:

Wild doesn’t really… hug. He’ll sit next to a Link and flop against them. He’ll lean. But he doesn’t quite understand to wrap his arms around, and he doesn’t respond well to someone wrapping their arms around him, feeling trapped. So the leaning is about as close as they’re gonna get haha! And that’s perfectly fine! He’s not heavy (like at all) but he is warm (absolutely buzzing with spirit magic), so he’s always a welcome snuggle buddy. Just as long as he doesn’t try to steal their things while he’s half on top of them haha!

10. Warriors:

I’m sorry, I truly am. He’s a sword. He doesn’t do hugs. And even if he did, his physical form is metallic. Cold and hard and just about the least comforting ever. I love the guy, but this just isn’t his strong suit.

[grimalkinmessor]

MP100 Characters Ranked on How Likely I Think They Would Be To Use The Death Note:

(because I like combining my hyperfixations ✨)

Mogami. I don't think I have to explain this one.

Ritsu. He is going on a killing spree IMMEDIATELY the boy practically IS Light Yagami, his name is literally spelled with the kanji for justice and he already went on one power-hungry crusade, he is RIPE on the Kira tree og

Dimple. He already has the god complex down, he just has to get on board with the whole killing people thing—considering he's already an evil spirit, it wouldn't take much convincing tbh

Shou. He would cause SO much havoc with it but only for fun. For the meme. For the vine. He kills the Queen of England with it and cackles as he watches the ensuing flood of Megamind memes. He would also threaten his dad into compliance with it because the Death Note isn't Battle Based, it's Instadeath. "Ever go on TV and embarrass me like that again and you're going out by dysentery."

Takenaka. He's not a bad kid, but being telepathic would make him incredibly susceptible to wanting to take bad people out before they did anything wrong. Plus just getting them to shut up. That idiot that keeps having vivid erotic fantasy in the middle of science class has ONE more again before Takenaka would embrace his villain arc whole-heartedly. The only reason he's this far down is because I think he'd hesitate.

Tsubomi. I think she'd kill someone just to see if she could get away with it. Then she'd put it away and only bring it out when certain situations arose that needed a Quick Solution™. That girl knows what needs to be done and she does it—she decisive. Anything like Suzuki happens again and she just drops them dead on live television Lind L. Tailor style and then goes on about her day like nothing happened. All heroes wear pretty hair clips 🙏

Tome. I don't know how to explain this one. Vibes. She feels like she'd be gripped by the powerful urge to kill someone but it would take her a lot to go through with actually writing someone's name down. She'd want to test the Death Note first to see if it worked, so that's one person down, but anyone else would need to have either hurt her or her friends irreversibly, and even then it would probably be a one time thing. She'd use it far less than Tsubomi—two people might actually be her max.

Serizawa. I hc that people with psychic powers can see the Death Note's bad jujus or whatever, so he wouldn't have to test it to know it would work, but I still think he'd use it. If he found it while he was still with Claw, he'd use it because it was easier to kill someone that way than with his psychic powers. Even if it he found it after Claw, it'd be the same reasoning. He's definitely killed people in the past and if someone hurt his friends or his mother he'd very much take the easy out of simply writing down a name rather than going for a fight. He'd still feel really bad about it though, so it'd probably only happen once.

Minori. She uses it to see if it's real, finds that it very much is, and then locks it away in her room. She won't use it, but it'll be a constant thought in her mind. A very real temptation.

Emi. She uses it once out of curiosity to see if it's real, then buries it in the woods where no one will ever find it...but she can go back for it if she ever needs it.

Hanazawa. He's reformed but his temper is still something to behold. He's only this far down the list because he's got that "I could kill you with my powers why would I need a book to do it for me" swag ✨

Shimazaki. Similar to Teru but less reformed. "I would just kill you with my powers why would I need a notebook" two electric boogaloo. Plus he's blind and idk if the Death Note takes braille or morse code.

Toichiro. The ULTIMATE "I'll just kill you with my powers I don't fucking need that thing"

Shinra. He wouldn't use it, but he'd absolutely make the mistake of picking it up and handing it over to someone that WOULD use it (cough rising sun psychic division cOugh)

Onigawara. Talks big shit about using it, but would never. Likes to think he COULD use it though, even though he's too upright for it.

Reigen. Picks it up out of curiosity and gets a laugh out of it, but doesn't test it. He's seen enough shit to be cautious though, so he has Mob look it over and then burns it once Mob confirms it's got bad vibes.

Mob. Sees bad vibes. Doesn't even pick it up. Blasts it into ash and goes home without thinking about it again. Buys milk on the way there.

[paranoidginger]

Random headcanons for the TF2 mercs!!

Scout: ADHD hardcore, should probably be medicated for it, but isn't. This man cannot stand still for anything, he is always tapping his feet or fiddling with something. He definitely bites his nails, especially his thumbs. Repressed bisexual who is accidentally homophobic because he thinks he isn't supposed to like guys, and thinks everyone chooses to like the opposite gender. He's a surprisingly good artist, and he has dyslexia. That mixed with dropping out of highschool made him somewhat illiterate, spelling is hard, and so is reading any big words.

Soldier: Jack of all trades, he has had every job possible, but if he weren't in love with going to war, he'd probably settle on properly running a raccoon sanctuary. He is the reason why Medic had to invent a cure for rabies. Definitely thinks that being a lesbian just means that you like women, regardless of gender, he refers to himself as a Lesbian after learning that Pauling Identifies as one.

Pyro: Probably not even a human, uses any and all pronouns. They're really smart, despite acting childish, and are the one who built their flamethrowers. Probably collects stickers. Would definitely watch MLP and drag the other mercs into watching it with them, Pinkie Pie is definitely their favorite of the mane six. They draw a lot, and are pretty good at it whenever they want to be, they just prefer drawing silly things. Their room probably smells like burnt plastic and gasoline.

Demo: Only goes sober whenever shit gets super, super serious, like one of the other mercenaries that he cares about gets hurt. He's got a really strong caretaking instinct that gets drowned out by drunken recklessness. He's a total lover, and definitely the type of guy to kiss the homies goodnight. It takes a LOT to actually get him drunk drunk, like, I'm talking ungodly levels of alcohol that would probably kill the average person. He's Spy's drinking buddy, and probably knows the most about Spy's background from listening to his drunken ramblings about regrets and how he wishes he was a better father. Demo probably knows a lot about most of the other mercs, just because he's a good listener and a vault whenever it comes to sensitive information. He's also really fucking smart. Probably pansexual tbh, just based on vibes.

Heavy: He gets nervous whenever he has to help out any of the more 'delicate' mercenaries. He knows he's ridiculously strong, and he has excellent control of himself, but he can't help but feel like he's handling glass whenever he's helping out any of his injured teammates, especially when it comes to Scout or Spy. He's super fucking protective of all of his team though, and would absolutely crack skulls if anything happened to any of them. He is the only person other than Medic who is allowed to touch Archimedes. Probably bisexual with a preference towards men.

Engie: He's usually pretty polite, but can be one of the most brutal out of any of the classes. He's definitely autistic with a special interest in machines. He probably wants to capture one of the mvm robots just to run tests and see if they're sentient. Low-key god complex, like, moreso than medic, he's just super humble about it. He definitely talks to all of his machines. He's 100% a trans man, I can see him as being demisexual.

Sniper: Definitely autistic, he's probably got a shitload of random animal information. Total arachnophobe, but only towards small spiders. Hand him a tarantula and he's fine, but show him a stick covered in baby spiders and he's going to probably kick it as far away from himself as possible and run away. He adores lizards of all kinds, and probably used to lay on the ground watching them all the time as a kid. This man can't use a kitchen for shit, but he manages to make anything he cooks over a fire absolutely delicious, he probably refuses to share though. Probably Asexual. Has a shitty taxidermy rat in his camper that he's unnecessarily proud of, and he probably collects bones. Super into oddities and weird little knick knacks, and he still has all of his baby teeth that he keeps in a little jar on a shelf. Can't run for shit, but could walk for hours if need be. Likes doing arts and crafts, he knits in his free time, and almost always has a sewing kit with him.

Medic: Knows a little about every different medical field, he just sort of studied up on whatever piqued his interest. DOES have a PhD in medical science, he just lost his license to legally practice in a hospital or doctor's office. Gay, probably a trans man. Has definitely experimented on himself before, giving himself different deadly diseases and whatnot just to challenge himself to make a cure before he dies. Also autistic. Spoils the fuck out of his birds, and would probably Frankenstein together a human body for Archimedes if he could figure out how.

Spy: Bisexual genderfluid icon. Usually only gets caught because he's being way too much of a cocky showoff. Definitely wears eyeliner and says that it 'helps him see better' when it's bright out, even though it's 100% just a fashion statement. Has a collection of antique cigar boxes and lighters.

[fiona-fififi]

Please may I have "Your hands are warm."?

Picture me asking like this btw

Well, this took me absolutely forever, but here's a silly little something that is basically just exclusively Buckley-Diaz family fluff. I know this probably is not what you had in mind, but this is where it took me. Hopefully, it's something. 💚

—

Title: Warmth

Rating: G

Fandom: 9-1-1

Pairing: Evan Buckley/Eddie Diaz

Summary: A tiny little fluffy snapshot of a Buckley-Diaz family camping trip and a chilly night out by the campfire. (Just fyi, the whole camping thing is mostly just vibes, I never actually really incorporated it in any significant way.)

Notes: The prompt "Your hands are warm" is from this list of Dialogue and “Scenario” Prompts.

Buckley-Diaz family, established relationship, fluff, ficlet, prompt fill

—

Read on Ao3

—

“Mmm, stay?” Eddie requests, snuggling down into the blanket wrapped around his shoulders and nuzzling into Buck's touch. “Your hands are warm.”

Buck chuckles at that, shifting his hands from Eddie's neck to cup his jaw and tilt his chin back gently, leaning over until they're practically nose to nose. “Don't you think maybe it's time to head inside? You're freezing.”

“Can't,” Eddie teases, grinning up at him with that silly smile Buck adores, “Chris isn't ready to head in yet.”

“Do not drag me into this,” Christopher argues from his spot by the fire. When Buck glances up at him, he is very obviously avoiding even a glance in their direction, and Buck can't help but snort a laugh.

“Your excuse just sold you out,” Buck teases, fingers still against Eddie's jaw. Eddie grins, big and goofy, and Buck can't help but tilt his chin back a little further until he can press a kiss to that pretty mouth.

“Mmm,” Eddie murmurs through a grin as they part, lips so close they brush Buck's as he speaks, “your lips are warm, too.” Buck huffs a laugh against Eddie's mouth at that as Eddie's grin grows and Buck tries to turn it back into a kiss, even as they both succumb to ridiculous giggles. 

“Ew.” Christopher's voice breaks their spell, the disgust dripping from his tone written all over his face in the scrunch of his nose and the grimace of his mouth. “NO.” He commands, as he launches a marshmallow at Eddie's head in response to their sappy display. It nails him directly in the nose, bouncing off both of them before it falls to their feet.

Eddie and Buck both only manage to dissolve into further giggles in response, Buck's shoulders shaking enough that he has to bury his face in the crook of Eddie's neck to keep himself upright. 

Christopher groans in annoyance and rolls his eyes. “Next time, I'm staying home,” he threatens, with a shake of his head, before he busies himself loading another marshmallow onto the roasting stick in his hand.

Buck barks a laugh at that, forever charmed by Christopher's teasing. “Oh, please, you're having a ball,” he counters, all smiles and red cheeks from some combination of the chill in the air and the warmth in his chest.

“I was until you started making out in front of my marshmallows,” Christopher shoots back, face serious as stone.

Buck full-body cackles in response, throwing his head back and straightening up in the process, and Christopher's face breaks into a grin at that.

Eddie grumbles, Buck's warmth suddenly too far away, and tugs at his arms to bring him closer again. Buck grins, a big, happy smile that stretches wide as he lets Eddie guide him back until he's draped over Eddie's shoulders, and Eddie's wrapping Buck's arms up under the blanket he's still cozied up under. Buck gives him a squeeze, and Eddie lets a hand grip tight to Buck's forearm, leaning back into him with a pleasant shiver. Buck presses a surreptitious little kiss to Eddie's temple, soft smile still dancing on his mouth. 

“Okay, kid,” Buck announces after a few pleasant moments of quiet snuggling, keeping himself draped around Eddie, “finish that one up, and then it's time to head inside. Don't want your dad to freeze.”

Christopher gives him a side eye, but he's very clearly trying to hide a grin, and Buck can't help the way his heart swells at just how well they all fit. He's not sure he'll ever get over just how much happiness their little family brings him.

Eddie, always the mind reader, squeezes his arm again to draw his attention, and when Buck shifts to meet his gaze, Eddie is giving him that soft smile Buck loves so much. “I love you,” Eddie mouths, barely any sound to avoid a scolding from Christopher, and Buck's own smile turns soft again for Eddie as he leans in to press a sweet kiss to his lips.

“Love you, too,” Buck promises, whisper quiet, nuzzling back into Eddie's warmth as they watch Christopher continue to pretend to ignore them.

Buck's not sure he's ever been happier. 

—

[random-twst-things]

Question - of all the characters, who: doesn't know twst isn't a dating sim, knows it's not but aims for it anyway, knows and suffers, and doesn't know - just vibing? Feel free to add more categories

Oooh! That's an interesting concept. I had to think about this for a while bc I wanted this to be the most accurate I could make it. And I'm SO sorry this took so long, I got busy with school and first semester tests I'm so sorry 😭

Contains: Tiny(very tiny) bit of possessiveness(Malleus) angst(?)(idia, jamil, azul, cater, sebek) most certainly some spelling mistakes here and there (English is not my first language I'm srry 😭)

Doesn't know twst isn't a dating sim:

Riddle: Did you really think Riddle would even know what a dating sim is? Absolutely not, especially not with the way he grew up. He has no idea why he loves you (he does, he's just in denial) he's so shy trying to pursue you, he has this act he tries (tires) to put up but it's so easy to see the effect you have on him. He's not as strict on you about the rules as he is the rest, he seems to have developed a soft.

Trey: (I'm so sorry, I don't know much about the guy 😭) Gentleman. That's its. Ty for coming to my TED talk. Okay, but srsly, hear me out on this; He's a whole gentleman when he has a crush. He definitely uses his great baking skills to his advantage with you. He definitely sees how others look and act around you, I mean, who wouldn't when it comes to you. Wanna learn how to bake? He'll gladly teach you and take this as a chance to get to know you even more.

Ace(1): I honestly don't think he'd know twst isn't a dating sim. He's mosy definitely smug about being close to you, after all he is your best friend, right? Bro thinks he has rizz but he's just a fumbling mess when he tries it just makes him look clumsy (sorry ace)

Deuce: he's so sweet. He's glad he's one of your best friends and get to be close to you without worry. Part of his delinquent side does come out a little when it comes to you, it's not directed to you! Not at all! More like directed towards those who did you wrong and didn't even try to say sorry. Don't worry, he won't do anything to reckless! He still wants to be an honor student after all. He's gonna do his very best for his mom and you.

Ruggie: oui, he's hard to tell on what category. He likes you. He likes how you are. It never bothered him one bit that your home was semi broken. God, the things he would think and want to say to you (He's romantic like that yall), but he's too shy to actually say (yall he's making me blush eeeee)

Kalim: he's too busy hanging out and being happy with you he doesn't even notice. All he knows is that he loves you and wishes to show you the world (see what I did there? Eh? Eeeh?) He's not at all shy about the compliments he gives you, he's really creative with them, tho. Invites you to every single one of his parties and makes you take home as much food as you want.

Epel: He's going for you most definitely, even with all these people. He does his very best to look strong and manly in front of you, that it's cute. He doesn't really mind if you call him cute or pretty, if that's what you like, but he's still gonna act (only a little) like he hates it, but he never tells you to stop.

Floyd(1): Two words; good luck. This guy will not try to hide his favoritism with you. He will not hide his desire to steal you or keep you from the rest. His very (very) open about it, too. It doesn't even matter if he knew twst wasn't a dating sim. He's still gonna be the same. You don't mind his (bone crushing) hugs? He's allowed to squish you? ....you shouldn't have said that bc now every time he sees you he squeezes you so tight he cracks your sore muscles like those chiropractors on TikTok.

Jade: hmmmm (good luck, again) He's a gentleman, but in an offsetting way, yk? He's the silent one. The type to smile when provoked and just bc, it's hard to tell the difference but its there. He's a watcher. He knows almost all of your special interests (Don't ask how he knows that). Putting the creepy aura behind, he's a nice guy (?) He'll most definitely rant about his mushrooms to you. You don't mind? You like hearing about his mushrooms? Oh my.... good luck

Malleus(?): I feel like he does, but doesn't at the same time? I don't think he knows what a dating sim is, but he notices the way the others act and look at you. He notices the way things seem... different. But he isn't one to back down when something precious to him is to be taken away from him. He is a dragon, after all. (Not that he'd let that happen to begin with, you'll love him dearly in the end....won't you?) Talks to you about his gargoyles, all the different facts. You dont mind the long talks about it? Youre asking to know more?? Oh great sevens....

Silver: (AWWWWW) he's so sweet. He tries so hard to show he likes you but in such a subtle way that it's hard to catch on it even notice. He's a gentleman at heart. He loves how understanding you are of his sudden sleepiness and tiredness and don't get angry at him for something he can't control as much as he'd love to. You wanna watch over him while he sleeps? Why? Oh, so nothing harms him when he's asleep? Oh dear... His heart is beating so fast he might not even be able to sleep now (he does anyways, but with tinted cheeks)

Knows it's not but aims for it anyway:

Leona: he's the type of guy to somehow always know something you don't expect him to know. Anyways. The dude could care less if the game wasn't designed to be a dating sim. He's still going for it in his own way. Unlike the past, this is something he can't give up on. you're something he can't give up on. But oh, is this man so so smug when he uses you as a pillow.

Vil: it's either Rook told him or he figured it out on his own before Rook told him. Even if twst wasn't meant to be a dating sim with love, he will turn zero into something like he's always done. He will by any means do his utmost and his best to pursue you all while being himself. He cherishes the moments you have alone when he's giving you advice on how to take care of your skin. The small and soft lingering touches when he teaches you how to apply moisturizer correctly.

Rook: Okay, he's bound to find out twst isn't a dating sim. He's a sharp guy. Even with the knowledge of knowing twst isn't a dating sim, it isn't going to stop him from pursuing you. He himself finds this situation funny with how many hearts you've captured even with twst not supposedly being capable of that. Oh? How did you know he was watching you? You could feel him? Oh dear trickster you sure do know how to pull his heart strings.

Floyd(2): Good luck once again. I couldn't decide whether he knew or not. But! Same situation regardless. Instead, tho, he's a bit more.... more him? He's gonna find this all so much more hilarious and funny.

Lilia: This cheeky old man most definitely knows. He's seen dating Sims and knows what they are. Just bc twst isn't designed to be a dating sim doesn't mean he can't aim for it. He's not at all shy when it comes to pursuing you. He's been alive for hundreds of years, what's there to be afraid of?

Knows and suffers:

Cater: (I'm so sorry, I had to 1.0) cay-cay gonna slay-slay, more like cry-cry. I feel like he's a "2nd male lead syndrome" type of guy, yk?? It's a bit hard to explain, but yeah. Anyways. 2nd male lead, we all know how that ends, don't we? (Hint: tears) He's cautious when it comes to love, hes scared of it at times. He does know he loves you but he's going to watch you being happy instead. He wishes you the best, truly! (he hates the little feeling in his chest when he says those words bc his words and actions say their happy for you, but the little feeling in his chest says otherwise)

Azul: he loves you, he really does, but would you? He knows he isn't the ideal guy. He knows he's done some shady things. And most of all, he knows (thinks) that with all these suitable people for you, he'd never be considered a choice. So he's content with just watching you from afar living a happy life. Every time you enter the lounge he finds himself between wanting to hide away or catering to your every need but he knows that if he gets any closer to you it'll just hurt more in the future.

Jamil: He's a smart guy, he knows. He also knows that he doesn't stand a chance with all these suitors going after you. A prince, an heir, a model/actor, knights, etc. He'd like to think he did stand a chance, but standing next to them, he can't help but let his insecurities get the better of him. But, oh... when you offer to help him with his chores he can't help but think that maybe... Just maybe there's a chance.

Idia: he most definitely knows, I mean, look at the way they all look at you!! He knows and suffers with the thought that he'd never stand a chance. You're being pursued by all these SSR characters!!! Surely you'd never pick someone like him when you could do so much better. He'd stuff himself in his room even more (if that's even possible) He'd avoid you even with his tablet. Every time he rejects the offer when you invite him to play video games he hates himself even more. Stop giving him false hope... Please

Sebek: (I'm so sorry 2.0) Malleus. That's why. His master, he can't seem to accept that his master would aim for a human like you, but he's hurt. He doesn't know why he feels that way. He doesn't understand why his chest hurts when he sees malleus and you interacting in such a way. (He'll begin to understand after a while, WHILE) once he realizes why it hurts, he is distraught. He won't show it, but you can see the subtle changes in his composure every now and then. He knows he has to let you go. He feels as if he has lost you. Lost something that wasn't even his to begin with and never would have been.

Doesn't know and/or just vibes:

Crowley: Dudes clueless

Grimm: he's just confused as to why everyone is after his henchmen. He doesn't know what a dating sim is either.

Ace(2): he's having the time of his life seeing you struggle with all this. He has absolutely no idea why so many are after you, but he's just gonna watch as they all struggle. (He knows why they are after you, after all his best friend in kinda cool, but he'd never admit to that) also has a laugh with watching riddle try (don't tell riddle he said that tho)

Ruggie(2): another that's gonna have the time of his life with this. Laughing like the hyena he is, watching the struggle (especially Leona's struggle 💀)

Jack: He's just vibing. This whole situation is a mess, really. He watches out for you most of the time just in case. (*caugh* floyd *cough*) He's a bit worried for you ngl so he wants to teach you self defense just in case, if you already know how to handle yourself thats great! (*cough* floyd *cough)

Bonus

He does know and tries to be supportive

Ortho: he knows. His brother told him in his ramblings, and he noticed that idia is thinking smth negative. He tries to encourage him in every possible way to just try, that there is a chance, but nothing seems to work.

[littlejuicebox]

Legit just sick in bed thinking about TavxHalstarion headcanons for if they all had a daughter:

- She would be princess problems, no doubt about it. And #1 daddy’s girl.

- “Oh you don’t want to take me shopping for ten new outfits, compliment me as I try them on, and hold all my bags while we shop? That’s fine, my daddy will take me.”

- “Oh you don’t want to build me a house with your bare hands because it’s too much work? That’s fine, because my daddy will. No, not that daddy. The other one.”

- “Oh, you don’t think women can be leaders and be in charge of men? That’s funny because my mommy lead BOTH my daddies in battle and all three of them saved YOUR mommies and daddies from being mindflayers.”

- “Some people only have ONE daddy and some people have NO daddies?” Cue genuine shock and confusion from six year old Tav Jr.

- Absolute menace to society. But also a strong, fearless leader.

- Knows how to sew, embroider, whittle, cast healing spells, live off the land, speak to animals, pickpocket/lockpick, ballroom dance… really a jack of all trades kinda girlie.

- She’s giving female Robin Hood meets social justice queen vibes.

- Generally kind, but if you’re a bully on the playground? She’ll draw blood without a second thought.

- If she’s called to the principles office for such an offense, Astarion is the first one through the door threatening to sue everyone.

- Meanwhile Halsin is checking Tav Jr. and the other kid over for injuries, healing them if necessary.

- Tav is simply shaking her head at Tav Jr, knowing damn well that strong sense of justice and morally gray vigilante way of handling it is all her and she can’t actually be too mad that her daughter picked up the trait.

-Halsin will try to help her control her internal rage with meditation, while Astarion will try to show her how to simply not get caught.

- Halsin: “What do we do when we get the urge to physically hurt someone, my heart?” Tav Jr: “Take a deep breath and ask the Oak Father for patience.”

- Astarion: “What do we do once we’ve actually physically hurt someone, darling?” Tav Jr: “Remain silent and ask for my lawyer to be contacted.”

- Regardless of who is actual, biological daddy, Astarion and Halsin share the role with pride and recognize one another’s strengths for what they are. It takes a village to raise a child, and little Tav Jr. is fortunate to have her very own village built right in.

[pinkrangersarah]

Please do the random headcanons you've got for the Fearless 7, I really wanna know what you have in mind and also feel free to even make a post for every single one of them!

Thank you, I love ya! 🙏🏻

shout out to @kehnarii for sending me all these requests, you are truly a peach and I am delighted to answer anything you send <333

anyway, I have thought about these clowns a ridiculous amount and what better way to dump all those thoughts here because lmaooo what else am I gonna do with them. i'm going to keep them here, though, for simplicity sake.

Merlin

Merlin and Arthur are half brothers, having the same father but different mothers; Merlin's mother is the current queen of Camalot. They're from the same fairy tale but the dynamic is wildly different, so I thought them being half brothers would be kind of a neat spin. Arthur is the oldest of the two.

Had to study magic in some secrecy as the texts he used formerly belonged to Arthur's first step-mother who turned out to be a witch. This is partially why lightning, despite its versatility, is his only spell.

Vegetarian. Nothing else to say here. Just a vibe I get from him.

Bi-curious, I think. Definitely leans toward women, but he'd be lying if he said he hasn't found a man or two attractive.

Shit driver. Do they have cars? Probably not, but consider a modern day setting. He's the worst driver out of the seven of them. Has absolutely stayed at a right-on-red light way too long due to panic, pissing off everyone behind him. This but it's Merlin and Jack.

Decent with kids. Knows a couple of party magic tricks and kids tend to like them.

Arthur

Arthur has a younger half sister, Morgan--or better known as Morgana Le Fay--a witch who is mysteriously absent. She is the king of Camalot's second child from his second wife, which makes her Merlin's older half sister. Arthur was very close to her up until her disappearance; having been raised with a bias toward witches, it made for a rather difficult separation.

Not the dumb jock stereotype some people make him out to be! While he can be reckless, brash, and immature, Arthur does have political knowledge and knows the ins and outs of his kingdom.

Straighter than Merlin's parking but a very vocal ally. Jack just casually implied he was bi and Arthur just scooped him up in a big hug and told him he would always support him. Jack was high-key confused, low-key annoyed but appreciated the sentiment anyway.

Second worst driver, mostly due to not paying attention to speed limits. Or stop lights. Just not paying attention period. Low-key road rage.

Arthur is great with kids, probably because A) he is a big brother and B) he's a big guy so kids want to climb him like a jungle gym.

Jack

Adopted into royalty as his step-father, a king, married his mother after Jack defeated the Giant and made his family wealthy.

His mother has a tendency to be emotionally manipulative, only being a doting mother whenever he does something that benefits her, such as stealing from and slaying the Giant. She was kinder when his father was alive, but only got nastier after he perished at the hands of the Giant.

Although he had been pampered and brought up as a true prince since ever since his mother married into the royal family (he was about ten years old), there is a part of him that has not forgotten where he came from. He grew up on a farm. His father taught him how to fight. Jack is stronger than he looks and can be scrappy if absolutely need be.

While the other guys of the F7 drive him absolutely insane sometimes, Jack prefers them over his own family since he's allowed to be himself around them. He's gotten used to the princely persona, but there is a small, unacknowledged part of him that kind of hates it due to the role having been practically forced on him.

He does genuinely like nice things, though. Low-key bird brain.

Jack is the only multilingual of the seven, speaking not only English and French but also German and Italian. This is only a little annoying to Hans and the triplets as they can't hide anything from him in their native tongues.

Biologically, Jack is an only child. He does, however, have an older step brother whom he has mixed feelings for.

Bisexual with a leaning toward women

His name actually is "Jacques", but people kept pronouncing it as "Jack" and he eventually gave up correcting them. Will end the bloodline of anyone who calls him "Jackie", though.

Decent driver. Sometimes gets way too into whatever he's listening to and misses an exit or turn. Is usually the navigator or DJ. Is the type to yell "I will turn this car around" if people are arguing in the backseat.

Terrible with kids. The house is on fire. God is dead. Wine aunt.

Hans

Hans and his sister, Gretel, are twins, though Hans is the older of the two. It's where his mom friend demeanor comes from.

Is honestly the best liar out of the seven of them. He doesn't lie often, doesn't like doing so, but he has such an honest face and earnest demeanor that he can make anyone believe just about anything.

Pansexual but I don't think he'd know that about himself. He just likes people.

Best driver out of the seven of them, but does that soccer mom thing if he has to slam on the brakes unexpectedly. Can't read a map to save his life, though.

Also great with kids. He's also a big brother, and his genuinely kind and upbeat nature makes kids gravitate toward him.

Pino, Noki, & Kio

As they all have a very similar fashion sense, even they sometimes aren't sure whose clothes are whose.

They do have distinguishing features if one is to look close enough. The height difference isn't much, but it is there with Pino and Kio being the tallest and Noki the shortest. Kio is the only one with freckles. Pino has heterochromia with one blue eye and one brown.

They are introduced from oldest to youngest. Pino is the oldest of the triplets, Noki being the middle and Kio the youngest. Noki is only a little salty that Kio is taller than him despite being younger.

kio vc: you're older by like eight minutes

noki vc: I will break your knee caps

Terrible liars. They get flustered quickly and contradict one another. Can't keep a secret to save their lives and it's usually Kio who breaks first. (I know this is sort of contradictory, but they're based off Pinocchio so I think it'd be fitting if they were some of the worst liars among the seven of them.)

Noki read Jack's trashy romance novels. He thinks they're hilariously terrible. Would honestly probably like Twilight for the same reason.

Decent drivers but cannot be left in any vehicle alone together. If there's no else there to keep them on track, they will get way too into a conversation and get completely lost.

Have the potential to be okay with kids (that ending credit sequence give some the impression those three kids were low-key adopted by them or at least became assistants or something), but they do need to be kept in check due to their mad scientist energies.