#but i haven't really seen that

[goat-moth-thing]

i think some get angry at transmascs for discussing our oppressiin because they view invisibility as a privilege rather than a way in which we are oppressed

when their view of invisibility as a privilege is challenged, they lash out and say that we want to be oppressed soooo bad and that we need to shut up

and of course, if we do shut up then nothing changes. we remain invisible and nobody sees us. or talks about us. or cares about us

[fesenmoon]

no fucking way

[hollis-art]

i keep seeing redesigns of them as humans so i decided to throw my hat into the ring

[eyes-of-nine]

pls assume i'm thinking about this moment 24/7 all week every week

[giantkillerjack]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

[plain-text version of this post can be found under the cut]

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

Plain-text version:

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

P.S. Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

[phantom-shell]

Okay, Ford. Okay.

[hiding-under-the-willow]

Okay so I need someone who's better at landscapes and art style replication than I am to hop on this idea. because this man and his alien planet biome and storyline were made for the scavengers reign art style fr

[bixels]

tarpit site.

[vanmarkus]

9-1-1 + close-up 3/?

[tyttetardis]

Finally managed to record a bit of David at curtain call 😍

Brilliant seeing this incredible production once again - and getting to see what's different and what isn't 🥹🥰

(Please don't repost ☺️)

[robinparravel]

Finally watched Night at the Museum for the first time today, and wow, tumblr wasn't lying, that cowboy and that roman sure are gay

[kuromi-hoemie]

i am not immune to transmascs in sweatpants and a sleeveless top

im rly fucking weak about it actually

[borkthemork]

So I learned that if you fail the Drama check during the sunken car investigation, Kim will basically find your attempt at whistling endearing and encourage you to keep at it

It's really cute. It goes to show that Harry messing up out of genuine determination makes Kim see him as endearing rather than a full-on disaster sometimes

[bird-inacage]

The Heart Killers Trailer | Kantbison + UNHINGED

CURRENT CAUSE OF DEATH.

I'm sorry - they did not prepare us for this. BDSM??? A 500-Days-of-Summer DANCE NUMBER?! THESE TWO ARE GOING TO BE SO INSANELY DERANGED AND CHAOTIC, I LOVE THAT FOR THEM.

[fox-guardian]

[ID: Digital drawings of Needles from The Magnus Protocol on a gray background. He is a thin, shadowy figure in a brown raincoat with the hood up and dark gray pants and gray shoes and black fingerless gloves. His only visible facial features are his large eyes and mouth, and needles make up his eyebrows and poke out of his chin like a goatee. He also has needles coming out of his fingertips. The first drawing is a bust showing him smiling at the viewer, and the second is a full body drawing of him posed as though walking with his hands near his sides making clawing gestures. He is smiling at the viewer with extra needles poking out from between his teeth. end ID]

~~~~

a hesitant needles design!! keeping my design pretty vague and ambiguous for now, waiting until we get more description cuz i feel like we're def going to soon enough. I imagine the needles are usually under the skin and then poke out as needed (i just drew them as brows and beard to get the Needles Thing across) (no i did NOT mean to give him a goatee it just happened)

[factual-fantasy]

In the midst of fighting my art block I got to thinking about my Kirby right back at ya AU. Galactic Nova was hardly the first character in line for a redesign- but thinking about him was enough to spark some drawing inspiration in me XDD so I went with it. Beggars cant be choosers!