#billford if you REALLY squint

[phantom-shell]

Okay, Ford. Okay.

[moonziies]

Should Bill Run Over This Nerd The Game!!!

Available on all consoles!!! Insane Graphics!!! WHOA!!! This game definitely doesn't have free will!!! Buy it now!!!

Audio from LukaBigPants on Twitter/X ⭐️

[kaptnkablooey]

My ex lab partner still misses me…. But his aim is getting better!

[holycrimin]

doesnt it just suck when your two exes who happen to both be insane cult leaders fight

also i know his tie is black... i was playing around w saturation... pls dont hit me with rocks....

extra + alts under the cut!!

[atlas-the-idiot-2]

NO WHITE BOY THAT TRIANGLE IS NOT A GOD FIGURE FOR YOU TO DEVOTE YOURSELF TO!!!!!!!

[godsfavoritescientist]

Billford Fic Recs: Part 1

Everything on this list is rated either Gen or Teen, so it’s accessible for the sex-repulsed billford fans out there. Part 2 will be all the fics that don’t fit within those ratings! Everything on this list (aside from the still-updating one) is a completed fic that was written year/s before Book of Bill came out. Most of these are under 5k words, and while most of them are pre-betrayal and canon compliant, there’s a few that cover different eras in the timeline and AUs. These are some of my all-time favorite billford fics, plus some bill-centric fics at the end of the list.

A Change of Scenery, by Nelja https://archiveofourown.org/works/10914882 Pre-betrayal, Ford’s perspective, 4k words

This fic really nails the devotion-to-the-point-of-obsession that Ford had for Bill. It’s one of the very first fics I think of when someone asks for recommendations. Really really top tier stuff. I wish there were more fics that had this same tone and a central focus on Ford’s obsessive worship of Bill. I can’t do this fic justice, you just have to experience the writing for yourself.

The Writing of Destiny, by Nelja https://archiveofourown.org/works/6256570 Pre-betrayal, Ford’s perspective, 1k words

This fic says so much with so few words. It goes over Ford’s feelings for Bill, as well as some moments in Ford’s life that led up to becoming the kind of person who would fall for Bill.

Devote, by orphan_account https://archiveofourown.org/works/8783656 Pre-betrayal, Ford’s perspective, 600 words

Ford gets a tattoo. This one is also chock full of the obsessive devotion Ford had for Bill. It’s a delicious little peek into how potent his feelings for Bill were.

Loose from the Lever, by clockheartedcrocodile https://archiveofourown.org/works/32120011/chapters/79575955 Pre-betrayal, mostly Fiddleford’s outside perspective, 9k words

The imagery and voice in this one is fucking impeccable. Best I’ve ever read on ao3. It’s also an absolutely chilling read. Fiddleford can sort of piece together the fact that Ford is working with… someone. And meanwhile, Ford’s relationship with Bill in this one is gut-wrenching to see. Bill is cold and calculating in ways that are arguably disproven by the book of bill, but it’s still such a believable read on their relationship.

Now You See, by MaryPSue https://archiveofourown.org/works/8134141 Mostly pre-betrayal, AU where Bill comes through the portal in the 80’s, 4k words

Only billford if you squint. This one’s about Ford undergoing a slow body horror transformation while building the portal. Bill stops him from enlisting Fiddleford’s help, and his uneasiness and isolation is so palpable. This fic is good at building atmosphere.

The Ol’ Three Legged Waltz, by equilateralromance https://archiveofourown.org/works/35691013 Pre-betrayal, AU where Bill is upfront about a lot more things from the start, 3.5k

This one has such a unique writing style, it feels very romantic in the classic sense of the word, like it was written in an era gone by. Their relationship is very soft and tender in this one, a win for fluff fans everywhere. It’s about the first time Bill possesses Ford, and is a very sweet what-if for a world where Bill is better at letting Ford in, emotionally speaking.

Stars in my black and blue sky, by idrilhadhafang https://archiveofourown.org/works/41989533 Ford reminisces on how much he used to love Bill. 1k words

Solid characterization in this one. It’s short and to-the-point and feels true to canon.

Weirdpocalypse, by completetheory https://archiveofourown.org/works/20798036 Post-canon, Bill visits Ford’s dreams, 1k words

This one’s a really interesting take on why Weirdmageddon failed. Very bittersweet.

One Stage of Grief, by Fooeyburr https://archiveofourown.org/works/13969392 Post-betrayal, Ford in the multiverse grappling with how he feels about Bill, 8k words

This one is all about Ford obsessing over what he had with Bill while refusing to come to terms with the fact that he cared about Bill! Which is all set up/framed by some fun multiverse worldbuilding, too. - Bonus round: Bill-centric fics -

Wasting Away Again in the Goldilocks Zone, by ckret2 https://archiveofourown.org/works/57714430/chapters/147167545 Post-canon, Bill dragged kicking and screaming down a very long road towards redemption, updates weekly and will end up being hundreds of thousands of words at minimum.

This is the fic for Bill growing and changing as a person in post-canon. Every single doubt and hesitation you might have about whether Bill is even capable of change? It’s absolutely taken into account in this one. Seriously, its characterization of Bill is so scarily good that it accidentally predicted a mountain of things that got revealed in the Book of Bill. If you invest your time in one super long fic in your life, make it this one.

A Romance of Many Dimensions, by Haley3 https://archiveofourown.org/works/20796845/chapters/49427522 Covers the span of Bill’s entire life in detail. Finished work. 250k words

A breathtakingly ambitious fic that consistently knocks it out of the park. There are so many things I could say about this fic that I don’t even know where to start. I feel a lot of things about this fic. If you’ve ever wanted a fic that delves into Bill’s psyche and is tragic in its (pre-tbob) canon compliance, and has an opening set in flatland that approaches things from a really creative angle, and has my favorite interpretation of the axolotl, and rewires your whole brain, then this is the fic for you. Feels a bit reductive when it covers Bill’s time interacting with Native Americans on earth, but otherwise one of The Fics of All Time.

[tigersharktheautisticseawing]

gravity falls fic/au concept (billford, romantic if you squint hard enough, mostly platonic tho)

Theraprism, and for some reason Ford is brought into the process (maybe they got drunk married or as a "apologise to the people in your past" type of thing) and Bill is fucking furious with Ford because he destroyed the last of his home dimension. And the Axolotl decides that Ford's "breaking the ice" activity will be trying to make Bill trust him enough to give him the story of his home dimension, and Ford's like "He actually told me that a while ago, but he probably lied lmao" and describes what Bill told him, and the Axolotl says that it matches their notes in every aspect that they have notes of, and they know the notes to be true. Then the Axolotl gives Ford the task of finding out the monster's name, telling him that "they must be brought in, it's an important step in getting Bill to heal from it"

After this shenanigans ensue, as they spend time in the theraprism and maybe even outside of it after a while, bonding and stuff and trusting each other again

Then after a while Ford asks "Hey, so what was the monster that destroyed your home dimension?" and Bill kinda repeats the whole 'it'll eat you alive' thing, and Ford just says "I'm stronger now lol, besides I just wanna research something so powerful that it destroyed an entire dimension!" and Bill kinda shuts it down and they keep going back snd forth about it, until one faithfull day, after Ford says something to the effect of "We'll find it and things will get better! Maybe killing it will help you get over it!" Bill just snaps and basiically screams at Ford that he did it, it was his fault, and he is fully responsible for it

Then Ford stares at him and says "You said a monster destroyed your dimension"

And Bill says "That wasn't a lie then, was it?"

And hurt/comfort ensues they roprt to the Axolotl (who probably knew it the entire time lmao, just wanted Bill to have some other fucking creature to talk to other than the drawing of his parents)

This can also get merged with another AU I was spinning around in my brain, basically Bill cracks when his mental state goes really really bad, and his first crack, placed under his bricks that weren't there at the time, happened when he killed his dimension, and as he lost more and more he just kept fucking cracking, and he has panic attacks, mental breakdowns and all the juicy stuff, meanwhile the Axolotl is just straight up tired, cuz this mf acting all unbothered like the only reason he even was in his office wasn't the fact that he hgad a violent panic attack caused by not being able to remember which parent was which color and how they looked like less than 10 minutes ago

[critter-crawlee]

Can I just say I think Romesse is a fascinating ship?

Now I say that, but I’m going to make it clear: I do not ship Romesse.

But even so, I’m just intrigued by the concept. Because it’s basically built on the idea that while Romeo was watching Jesse from afar, he formed some kind of parasocial relationship where he felt like he and Jesse were super close despite that not being the case. Then when he tries to make that relationship real and Jesse doesn’t reciprocate, he basically throws a tantrum and does something akin to “i’m never going to talk to you again!” like a kid would do.

Romeo’s so immature and doesn’t know how to express his emotions in a healthy way, and in the case of Romesse, Jesse becomes the subject of that immaturity. They made him feel bad, so he put the “feeling bad” back on them tenfold.

Like, again, I don’t ship Romesse in the slightest, but I still wish there were more fics of it just to explore their dynamic in a romantic nature (albeit one-sided on Romeo’s part).

If you really squint, Romesse could be seen as similar to Billford from Gravity Falls tbh

[ignoredbellyaches]

RESONANCE

Pre-portal Billford fluff blurb, angst if you squint, not proofread we die like men

Ford had a tendency to calling Bill his muse. It was, in Bill's humble opinion, a well-earned title; One he deserved.

And, although he would never admit it... Ford really didn't need Bill to make art.

There's only so many interdimensional bars, space mom and pop shops, and authority centers you can raid and burden before you feel tired of it all. That's when Bill would resort to his palace, the Mindscape. That's where his real entertainment began, seeing the creations of others and how he could easily distort their most personal thoughts.

Yet, somehow, Sixer was different for Bill.

He didn't need to manipulate, or even make his presence known, to enjoy Ford's dreams. He simply watched in awe as this human, he had to remind himself, HUMAN made such beautiful imagery in his brain. Detailed and complex meteor showers, large libraries of scarily accurate knowledge, and Bill's favorite...

Vast, endless galaxies.

Floating through the space that Ford had made himself, even without being off Earth— It was a masterpiece. Every constellation down to a point, a serene silence keeping company, and the stars. Bill couldn't comprehend how magnificent they were. Dainty yet bold explosions of light bursting and disappearing like a disco, every color imaginable to human, every experience having true to tale math behind it.

Bill had never seen anything so brilliant.

Yet, the most curious of Ford's mind was the center. Just next to his conscious, Bill could see... Himself. The radiant, glowing center piece of it all, with Ford at his knees in front of him.

He was Ford's light. And Ford, his.

...

requests/asks are open : )

[caspercryptid]

For the Billford thing maybe something Monster Falls related?

Ford is like a sphinx to contrast Stanley being a gargoyle but Ive seen versions of Ford being a deer centaur like Dipper and Stan being an aquatic creature to match Mabel being a mermaid. Pick your poison with this one

Okay so bill's humanoid design is inspired on @monobmp's, that's basically what I was thinking of. I'm sorry to all the object head lovers. it's not my field. As for Ford. Well. :- )

Also uh, I invented a whole new version of this AU because I wanted a reason for it to hit Ford, since like. If it happened pre-portal and then he came through he might be able to avoid it? anyway. So. There's a whole setup here. Have fun Requests still open for Billford ______________________________

"—Stan's crimes include pug smuggling, embezzling, highway robbery, regular robbery, advanced robbery—"

Stan is lifting the remote to turn the television off when Shandra Jimenez cuts off.

"—Though this list is far from complete, we have— breaking news. The fireworks and explosives on the mountain seem to have broken open some kind of — underground river, or spring? Water is pouring off the mountain and we may have flash flooding incoming."

Stan turns off the TV.

"You kids wanna go vandalize Mayor Tyler's mansion?" Dipper squints. "Should we…maybe avoid going out in flood conditions?"

"What?" Stan scoffs. "It's a little water. Come on. it's not a tsunami. What's some weird mountain water gonna do?"

_____

"—aw, shoot," Gideon says, looking out the prison window after he's made his deal with Bill. "it's my yard time. Walk with me, cipher."

"Sure, kid, always willing to go anywhere with a friend!"

______

Ford walks right into it.

The seismic activity sets off every sensor in his lab— every measurement device for every kind of disturbance, all at once. He knows something is coming, and naturally, that means he needs to study it.

He's expecting Bill— he has his gun ready and loaded, he has his weapons, his coat.

At first, it seems as though his equipment was wrong. There's nothing in town but ankle-deep water. He wades in, looking down.

His reflection is…strange. It shifts, making him look as though he's made of gold for a second, and then he realizes it's— the sunlight reflecting from his skin. He's shining, sparkling strangely. He reaches up to touch his own face and is stopped dead by being able to look through his fingers.

"—Ah," he says, out loud. "That isn't good."

And then all hell breaks loose.

_____

Bill is physical.

Bill is physical and he doesn't like it one bit. He tears out of the prison yard— climbing the fence while everyone is still panicked and screaming, running into the street. physical. physical. physical.

What was his protective shell is just clothes around him now: no more bricks, just yellow and gold. His hands are inky gray-black, but they feel like human skin, and his feet are hitting the ground, and as he can feel his breath ragged in and out of his chest.

not good. not good. not good.

He runs back into town, splashing into the water still pouring everywhere: he can't feel its power anymore, and that's what really scares him. His power over the mindscape is— weakening. He thinks maybe he could temporarily leave this body, but it's his, and as long as he can't go back to the nightmare realm that's a problem. He's not just projecting himself here anymore, he's here.

He feels like screaming, so he does. He can't grow his shape, he can only throw his voice, so that's what he does— he lets his voice tear out of him, and it's almost as satisfying, the air reverberating, his voice echoing off the buildings. It drowns out all of the other creatures around him, whatever their petty struggles are, he no longer has to hear anything besides his own voice, his own panicked scream, and then there are hands on his shoulders.

Someone is trying to talk to him.

He chokes the noise back down: his throat hurts, and it isn't as funny as it should be, feeling pain. Not right now, not knowing he can't just throw this body out if he breaks it.

"—Bill," the voice repeats, and it's almost soothing, "Bill, look at me." Despite himself, he does.

He— sees water.

For a second that's all he sees, but he… blinks, what a strange sensation, and focusing his eyes reveals facial features in the water, almost-solid, at least shaded, and the clothes— the trench coat he knows, the voice he knows.

"—Sixer?" Bill asks.

"In the flesh," Ford says, "—or maybe not."

"What's— going on?"

"I'm not sure. but the— water levels seem to be dropping. That's a good sign. Maybe the effect is tempora—"

Ford has to cut off, because Bill tries to grab him— it's hard, getting a hold of the water, but with his clothes roughly hanging on him, he can almost get his arms around Ford.

"you're not—" Bill says, "You're not physical. I'm physical and you're not—"

"—Bill," Ford says, "I'll— figure out how to control it, alright? Just calm down—"

"How am I supposed to calm down? I'm a meat sack and I don't even get any of the perks!"

"The—" Ford almost laughs.

"I'm angry with you," he reminds Bill.

"Can you be angry with me later?" Bill asks, hysterical. "yeah yeah, I tried to kill you, I know, but what am I supposed to do? I can't maintain a flesh shack—"

"I'll— help. I'll help, Bill. Just relax."

Bill shoves his face in Ford's chest— his clothes are soaked through, and he smells like river water, but he tentatively lifts his arms to pat Bill's back.

"—Don't think too much of this," Bill manages, voice shaking. "this is a moment of weakness." "Moment of weakness," Ford agrees, "Temporary alliance." "—take me home with you." Bill orders.

Ford snorts. "—You're not going into the lab. But. You can…come with me."

"I'll settle."

He hates that he means it.

[knawing-at-my-enclosure]

Whumptober day 4!

prompt: HALLUCINATIONS Hypnosis | Sensory Deprivation | “You're still alive in my head.”

skipped yesterday bc i procrastinated a little too close to the sun lol

today i mostly just wanted to play around with some effects/brushes i haven’t really used much. i think it turned out okay considering my hatred of backgrounds. plus billford if you squint (not really but i could be perceived as such).

[bordapanic]

Third Time’s The Charm

Words: 1,500~ || CW: ... Billford || Bill touching Ford. Based off of liskribble’s piece.

A hand came at his shoulder first, tipped with sharp claws and purposeful. Another appeared, pulling his trench coat out at one side and his heart leapt up into his throat at the obvious intent behind the hands now.

“Bill-“ he started softly.

A shushing sound in the air all around him made him fall immediately silent.

More hands appeared, popping into existence only as they touched him, pure black with gold leading up forearms that never seemingly made it to actual shoulders. Each one made his stomach knot up further.

One at his forearm, claws trailing upwards. Another at the other edge of the trench coat, running along it before pressing to the front of his shirt instead. Another at the small of his back, just holding him there in a way that kept him trapped between it and the one at his front.

His lips pressed together on the edge of the ‘B’ for Bill’s name, barely restraining the natural inclination to ask. Or even just to say Bill’s name, uncertain what he actually wanted to ask. What was going on? He could tell, Bill was touching him. What was this leading up to? (Too presumptuous, there was no reason for him to think this was going to ‘lead’ anywhere. It was simply what it was.)

He didn’t... understand, and the hands kept moving shifting or gliding along and keeping him nervous, uncertain. (Scared? But that wasn't quite right.)

“Come on, Sixer. You trust me, don’t you?” His muse spoke to him, the hand at his shirt sliding over to grab onto his side.

Ford answered, slightly relieved to finally hear him. “Yes, always.”

“Then you don’t have anything to be worried about!”

He hesitated, wanting to object. Of course he wasn’t worried, not with Bill. It didn’t make any sense to be worried with only Bill around. “You’re right, Bill.”

Fingers curled into his hair, unexpectedly pulling his head back and he gasped. Shining above him was a large glowing yellow eye, engulfing his entire sight, watching him. It squinted slightly, amused. “Of course I am!”

The fingers at his hair moved to his temple then his glasses were taken off, blurring his vision. He only had a moment, blinking and attempting to put everything back into focus again, when a hand slid over his eyes, blinding him.

All the hands slowed for just a moment, still there, but movements calmed temporarily like they were waiting on something. He took a shallow breath, waiting as well.

He felt a hand playing along the underside of his neck.

Ford tilted his head backwards for the hand, for Bill. The fingers hooked along his jawline, a perfect fit locking into place, keeping his neck craned back. A finger trailing down the exposed throat.

“Bill.” He was solely aware of the hand at his throat, everything else having turned into some blurred backdrop in his mind. The other hands came back to life then, fingers possessively curling around him or claws pressing into his skin.

A new hand gripped into the hair at the back of his head, the hand at his front was were now the claws scraping down his chest, and and his tie roughly gradually being pulled loose.

All his nervous energy was now something... desperate almost. A refrain of pleas asking for an unknown something. His voice mindlessly came out in a reverent whisper. “Bill.” It felt good.

“Better hold onto that next one. You know what they say about the third time!”

He wanted to say Bill’s name again. His muse. All he could think about now. But he kept his mouth shut, only thinking of Bill’s name in his mind, over and over again. An endless repetition that kept him from speaking it aloud again, and matching that desperate unknown energy that had taken hold of him earlier, finally identifying what the pleas thrumming his body was for. Bill. He wanted Bill.

A hot rush of shame flushed through him and he squirmed in Bill’s hold, trying to keep himself from leaning into every touch. (It was greedy). It was hard not to though, with every touch he wanted to push into it, embrace it fully, take everything Bill gave.

Bill’s hand was finally done loosening the tie and the fingers moved undoing the buttons at Ford’s shirt before slipping inside to bare skin. The hand felt hot and cold at the same time, like a temperature so extreme that it was hard to tell whether your skin was being burnt by the cold or the heat. Except this sensation wasn’t painful, and Ford began to feel it from all the other hands now too, especially the one at his throat.

Ford gasped, arching up into the hand, sputtering and barely keeping from saying Bill’s name again.

“Almost got you to say it again, and I’ve barely even touched you!” Bill said cheerfully.

Was this a game? He nearly asks what’s going on, but he doesn’t. He’s already sure he would receive a straightforward answer.

“That’s my smart guy.” Bill praised him. The hands finally tear away Ford’s trench coat, but Bill continues on. “And if I answered every single question you had we’d be here for eternity.” A hand rakes back up his arm along the thin shirt material and Ford can’t help but think it may have torn. “So you only get one question tonight!” Another hand undoes the rest of the buttons on his shirt before it’s diving inside as well, tracing up the side of his ribcage. “Got it?”

“Yes. What-“ He stops himself after the first word. A question about something... else was still a question.

“Hmm? What was that?” A hand rubbed circles over his chest, the hot and cold feeling messing with his mind as it continually passed over a nipple almost inconsequentially like it wasn’t intentional, making the area increasingly sensitive.

What happens if I say your name a third time? “N-Nothing.”

“If you say so.”

Hands pull at his shirt, sliding off his shoulders and removing it along with the tie, stripping him. Exposed.

He can’t see himself and he knows it’s only Bill with him, but it makes him nervous again. As though the shirt being present, even if unbuttoned, kept this... within familiar territory. Bill had laid a hand on him before while he’d been clothed, a hand lingering on his arm or wrapping his arm around Ford’s neck. This was just... multiple hands had been all, no difference from if it had only been one, right?

Bill’s hands pressed back to him though, touched more purposeful and driven than just a simple touch of an arm from his friend and muse like nights from before. (The latter was what made something so simple so significant and distracting, wasn’t it?)

Hands wrap around his wrists, fingertips digging into the skin, gently holding them in place as hands roamed over his torso. A hand scraping down his abdomen only to lightly trail across his stomach.

Then fingers ran along the edge of his pants, a thumb tucking along the inside as fingers went over the front of his pants and Ford realized he was hard. Fingertips brushed just centimeters above, and he desperately tried to ignore the sensation because even just the thought alone of his close Bill’s fingers were was... not helping the situation.

He jerked slightly in surprise at additional hands at his thighs now, claiming the skin as the hand at the front of his pants moved down rubbing him through the material. “Bi-!” He bit down on his bottom lip, with a short whining noise that he was immediately embarrassed over.

“You know if I wasn’t such a great guy I would have counted that one! If I were you though I’d ask your question while you still can!”

Ford strained against the hands, trying to keep still and failing. In response all the hands holding onto him tightened to keep him in place.

He was trying to reign his mind back in enough to even think about what Bill had just said, what it meant, when the hand at the front of his pants started undoing the button and zipper. His mouth opening on a shocked gasp when Bill’s hand wrapped around his length, slowly stroking him.

“Oh God-” Bill, Bill. Ford started panting, pushing back into every touch, every hand. All of it.

“Running out of time, Fordsy.” His muse told him.

Question. A- only one question. Ford barely reached back to all the threads of questions that were virtually out of his reach. “What...” What was going on or what was happening. What would happen. What, what, what. None of them answering what he really wanted to know. “Why ... ” Ford asked airily, “why is this happening?” 

The hand on his neck suddenly tightened, fingers growing to encompass his entire neck, and the hand covering his eyes slid off. Almost too bright to even look at above him was Bill. “Because you’re mine, and I want to.” His voice boomed on the word, reverberating through him. His .

The hands at Ford’s wrists pulled them tightly behind his back, and he shuddered looking up into Bill’s eye. Feeling claws possessively grip into him and the slow strokes going faster, each one building up that desperate feeling higher and higher into his chest. His whole body turned hot, unrecognizable except for where Bill was touching him. The only thing that mattered... The name flowed out past his lips. “Bill.”

[kindafooey]

Symbioses

Here's a little birthday ficlet to my amazing friend @wolfmoonjournal! Have the most fantastic of birthdays, you ♡ Let's also make this a belated b-day present to @mooseings, who had their day of birth earlier this week! Both of these awesome peeps work with animals, and that's totally a theme here. :D You guys rock!

I apologize for the slight time inconsistency - the theory of social anthropology that appears in the ficlet wasn't actually coined until the late 90's, so Ford shouldn't really be aware of it. But it's one of my favorite interspecies development theories ever brought up in my philosophy lectures back in the day, so I had to use it nevertheless! I hope it does enough to justify its anachronistic presence. (Also please let me know if I majorly hecked anything up here, as it's really not my field of expertise. ;A;)

Pre-betrayal Billford, G-rated.

Ford let out a deep, harmonious sigh as he let his hands down on his crossed knees. The meditation techniques and the serenity of the Dreamscape were merely another drop in the ocean of all things his brilliant muse had taught him, and something he’d be eternally grateful to him for. He had never been a particularly good sleeper – his mind was constantly at work and allowed him very little rest, but now, he could simply empty and arrange his Dreamscape as he saw fit, slip into a meditative state and wake up to the morning sun in a state of complete, blissful relaxation.

Tonight, however, his mind was set on what it did best: research.

He opened his eyes and, with a light motion of his hand, brought his archived memories to surround him in the form of countless neatly arranged notes and hardcovers. Bill had suggested he should turn them into something more abstract, less constrained and easier to scan for the exact information needed, but Ford preferred to keep his knowledge in classic packages he could physically leaf through, even if it was a little more time-consuming.

He got up from his cross-legged position and reached to pick the nearest book. Social development of mammals. Hm, that wouldn’t do, seeing how it most definitely did not fit in the mammal class. Was it even a vertebrate? It certainly sported quite a few insect-like physical attributes, so should he begin his search from there instead? Ford frowned. This was not going to be an easy task.

Suddenly he felt a familiar presence flicker into existence right next to him, and it made his heart leap with joy.

“Top o’ the night to ya, smart guy!” Bill greeted with a cheerful tip of his hat.

“Bill! It is wonderful to see you”, Ford said, turning to face his muse with a delighted smile. “It has been quite a while since we last met.”

“Sure it has! Busy times, my friend. Busy times.” Bill looked around. “Well, I see you’re already hard at work on our transdimensional breakthrough! Good on you, Six – hold on.“ Bill squinted. “’Human vs. animal behavior.’ What’s all this?”

“Oh”, Ford laughed. “I apologize. I do plan to return to my portal calculations as soon as I have figured out this little side project of mine.”

Bill squinted again. “Side project?”

“I assume you know of the shapeshifter that recently hatched from its egg and is currently kept under scrutiny in the underground bunker. I am searching through my memories to gain some insight as to what would be the best way to go around its socialization process.”

“Hm, so you’ve got yourself another freak of nature to study! Hah, I can see the charm in that, Fordsy!” Bill winked. “By socialization, you mean domestication, right? That’s how you get yourself a nice obedient pet, y’know!”

“I feel the word ‘domestication’ doesn’t quite encompass what I wish to achieve with the creature”, Ford explained. “Shifty – that is what we call it – appears to be highly intelligent, far more so than domestic animals. I am yet to find out how much its social nature can be likened to that of other socially developed fauna, or perhaps even humans.”

“But you’re planning to keep it locked up and conditioned to your praise and care, right? Sounds like a pet to me! Or better yet, a lab rat!”

“Well… it’s a little more complicated than that. You see…” Ford fell quiet. Was he about to lecture his all-knowing muse? What an absurd idea. Then again… perhaps his muse was fluent first and foremost with the ‘what’, and did not bother himself with the intricacies of ‘how’.

He cleared his throat, mentally preparing a profuse storm of apologies in case he’d catch even the slightest sign of offense in his muse’s expression. “Perhaps this scientific anecdote will shed some light on what I mean. Recent developments in the theory of social anthropology suggest…” He looked around. “I could probably find the article I learned this from floating somewhere in here, if you wish to read it yourself.”

Bill swished his hand impatiently. “I’m a busy guy, so get to the point! We can fact check later.”

“All right. Studies have shown evidence that we did not, in fact, domesticate dogs. Instead, it would appear that they domesticated us.”

Bill let out a bark of laughter. “Hah! That’s a good one, Fordsy! Are you saying the tail wags the dog? Could the rumors about fluffy pooches controlling society from the shadows be true? Well, I’m not denying any possibilities here, that’s for sure! Everything your lot thinks it knows about the government is a bunch of lies, anyway! Hahaha, this is priceless!”

Ford smiled. His muse’s ability to find entertainment in every topic was truly astounding. “Allow me to explain. When humanity and the ancestors of the species we now know as dogs first came into contact, humans were yet to develop a truly social, cooperative nature that our current lifestyle, even our very essence as a species, is built upon. The early dogs, perhaps still wolves, approached us and eventually became our aid in gathering food. They followed us and guarded us from other predators, and received our protection and care in turn. It was a deeply symbiotic relationship that greatly benefitted both sides. However, they also taught us something completely new.”

Bill looked a little skeptical. “And what might that be?”

“Loyalty.” Something about saying this powerful word out loud made Ford blush slightly. “Friendship, one might even say. In the process of humans and dogs learning to share their territory and lifestyle, humans were taught new ways to communicate, express their affection and reach out for one another. Some even say that this interspecies cultural exchange could have played a crucial part in the very foundation of civilization as we know it.”

“Could be, could be!” Bill nodded along, still looking more amused than convinced. “But to be real with you for a second, Stanford, I don’t think your kind took the rule of this planet by the power of tummy rubs!”

“You are right about that”, Ford laughed. There was a hint of sadness in his voice as he continued. “However, I do not believe humanity is truly the cruel, greedy conqueror mastering all in its path that history often makes it out to be. With those who gaze back at us with no ill intent, I think we much more prefer… partnership.” His blush deepened, and he had to avert his eyes from the softly glowing entity before him.

“M-hm. Okay, whatever toots your philanthropist horn, Sixer!” Bill said, swirling his cane around carefreely. “So what’s this all got to do with your slimy little pet?”

“I would like to learn how to better understand it and fulfill whatever needs it may manifest. Shifty has already developed a primordial level of linguistic skills, and it uses that and a variety of other communicative means to interact with me. I do not wish to underestimate its social capability or misunderstand its intentions, that is all.”

Bill smirked. “Sounds like you’ve got it all figured out, so all I’m gonna say is good luck with that! I’m sure something that constantly changes its face has nothing but good will and friendly thoughts up its sleeve! A true gentleman, just like your old pal Bill!”

Ford smiled warmly at his muse’s gracious words of encouragement. “That does remind me…” he scratched the back of his neck awkwardly, his face still redder than usual. “Bill, I cannot possibly even imagine how much urgent business you must have on your plate. It is shamefully selfish of me to even ask this, but… if there is any way to arrange it… I would, uh, very much like to see you more often.”

“Hm?” Bill threw a curious look at him. “But you see me all the time, Fordsy, and vice versa! Isn’t that why you prepared all those artefacts portraying yours truly in your house?”

“I… I guess that is true. What I meant is… I want to talk to you like this, face to face. It is a great honor to be in your presence, and it gives me as much delight and joy as it inspires me. I love to hear your brilliant insight on everything between the moon, the sun and beyond. I learn so much from you, and, well…” Perhaps you might learn something from me as well. That much he didn’t dare say out loud.

“Hmmm…” Bill tapped the space below his eye in a thoughtful manner. “Well, get a move on with that portal project of ours, and I just might find the time to visit you every night!”

“W-what?” Ford’s eyes widened. “Every… every night?”

“Sure! You’re gonna need a hand to guide you to the right direction, anyway! We’re just getting started here, Fordsy! We have long nights of work ahead of us! Could take years, even!” He gave him another wink. “That sound often enough for ya?”

“Yes, it’s… more than I could ever hope for.” If Ford’s face hadn’t been burning by then, it now matched the crimson covers of the books around him. “I have no words to express my gratitude. I will do everything in my power to make it worth your while.”

“Peachy! I know you’ve got it in you, Brainiac. As long as you keep your eyes on the first prize and let side projects be side projects, I’m ready to stick with you for the long haul.”

Ford nodded, his chest filled with pride and enthusiasm. And perhaps something else.

He held out his hand. “I’m looking forward to our future endeavors.”

And when he felt the warmth of the black fingers and the coldness of pale blue fire, he was oddly convinced their joined hands brought to life something more than just a symbiosis.

[f-imaginings]

How dare you crawl into my heart with that beautiful BillFord fic of yours. How dar e

is this for real???? :D :D :D ahhhhhhhh! 

it continues, the fic. I’m writing the next chapter now. here’s an excerpt of the next chapter for being so lovely. 

^^^^^^^^^^^^ 

Changing the subject, Willow turned to fix Bill in her sights,assessing her ‘date’ for the evening. “So you - tall, dark, silent and sulky.What’s your deal? Are you one of Stanford’s nerd friends?”

Bill seemed almost affronted at first that she was addressinghim so casually, but after squinting at her for a few seconds more, he realisedthat antagonising someone who could ‘snap him like a twig’ wasn’t the bestidea, so he instead decided to ooze charm, in his own, charming Bill Cipher way™.

“You’re telling me he has more than one?” Bill put his handon his chest, feigning shock. “Gee, Sixer, who would have guessed!”

Yes clearly Bill was the epitome of charm.

Ford shot an irritated look at Bill, but was interrupted byWillow watching Bill wryly.

“That’s a surprise. I thought for sure the reason Stanford’shere describing you as anti-social is because you’re one of those holed up in thebasement science types.”

“I was practically born in that basement.” Bill saidsolemnly, enjoying the way Ford’s eye twitched at that.

“Figures.” Willow grunted. “See, that’s what I don’t get. Whyhole up in the basement when you’ve got all this beautiful fresh air andoutdoors here in Gravity Falls? Swim in the lake, go for a hike! You shut in’s make no sense to me.”

“Yeah, but you should see the size of his basement.” Bill countered, breaking out a rakish grinthat stopped Ford’s ire short, if only due to how startlingly pretty the grinwas. Ford found himself oddly struck by that observation. He was supposed to bespending this date disavowing his attraction to Bill, but it just kept slappinghim in the face.

“Not that size really matters, if we’re talking arbitrary abstractionsof spacial dimensions.” Bill noticed Ford staring and winked at him. Fordalmost double took, the wink and the pseudo-innuendo throwing him. Bill wasn’t flirting with him, he probablydidn’t even know what he was saying. Ford mentally berated himself. He certainly wasn’t saying that to appeal toyou.

“Called it. You totally are a big nerd.” Willow smirked atBill, drawing his attention back to her, giving Stanford a few moments to catchup with his heartbeat.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ does Bill make a friend? Does Stanford enjoy his date with Lazy Susan? What happens to Wendy’s mom? Why does Manly Dan punch trees? All will be answered!~ Thank you so much for reading and enjoying my fic.