#but i had the idea for the flag being like

[hasufin]

I'd also point out, it highlights how incredible idiotic they are.

If you understand American foreign policy, you rapidly realize that:

We never give shit away for free

It's always terrifyingly exploitative

It's always profitable to America

It supports an incredibly powerful empire

Let me explain. My favorite in this is the billions in military aid we give even to untrustworthy countries. You may ask "Why in the ever-loving fuck do we essentially give F-35 fighters to Saudi Arabia? They don't like us. Some of the Saud family are actual fucking monsters. Hell, the 9/11 terrorists were mostly Saudi." And you'd be right. But Saudi Arabia is a client state which is completely beholden to the USA.

Much the way Iran was in the 70s. Iran was given US-made F-16 fighters. They were very impressive craft, extremely effective, and pushing the envelope of technology at the time. With US military hardware, Iran had one of the most powerful militaries in the region. And after the Shah's government fell, the Islamic Republic of Iran promptly got in a war with the Soviet-backed Iraq. And this showcased the difference between American and Soviet military support. The Iranii absolutely kicked Iraqi ass... for about two weeks. Which was the point where those fancy-ass Tomcats started needed replacement hardware which Iran did not have. And because Iran was a hostile country to the USA, America wouldn't give or sell them what they needed (setting aside the Iran-Contra affair for not). The war stalled. Having lost the ability to maintain air superiority, Iran had to resort to human wave infantry attacks: wearing out machine guns with the chests of young men.

Over the course of the next decade, one young million Iranii men died in that war. A war which would have ended with Iran's flag over Baghdad in two months if they'd had American support.

Iran had a powerful military, but the USA held the strings. That's why the US government buys military hardware from US companies to give to other countries. So our allies are powerful, but they need us in order to be powerful.

USAID exists as an exercise in soft power. It was created as a counter to Soviet efforts, and it has been very successful. It means that when the USA wants to establish a base in some country, they're willing to talk, and give decent terms. It also means that places where immigrants would have to leave, are not quite so awful: which, you know, reduces the immigration republicans claim to care so much about.

None of this stuff is free, it all supports the US Hegemony. And while I have deep concerns about that, I think that the idiots in control right now just don't have any idea what they're doing and simply get angry at seeing someone else being given things.

The cruelty of racist white men.

[dollarbils]

don’t wanna be your fan | b.eilish

billie eilish x fem!reader

context. when your favourite fan suggests featuring in one of your videos, you reevaluate her position in your life.

warnings. smut, strap, oral, mommy kink, degrading?, ofstar!reader (very inaccurate only fans portrayal). also not proofread!

part 1 masterlist

when she’d first brought up the idea you were hesitant to say the least. she was kind, sweet and hot, but you hadn’t ruled out serial killer just yet. having her feature in a video would be great for your page since lesbian sex is climbing up the ranks, and seems to be the majority of your following. but you were hesitant, more that hesitant.

��Billie, it’s a good idea but i just don’t know if it would work out.” she huffed, on the other side of the phone, her frustration apparent.

“why not? are you scared?” she taunted you, but truthfully you were.

“it’s not that, what if my other fans think they have a shot and start harassing me?” a bullshit excuse and you knew it, but you felt like you owed it to yourself to be wary of the suggestion.

“they won’t know i’m a fan.” she paused for a second, and you could hear her breaths through the phone speaker. “besides, i’m your favorite fan right? i think i deserve it don’t you?” those words made you smile, imagining her smug little smile on the other side of the phone.

“okay.” she went silent, as if hoping you’d repeat yourself.

“wait, okay?” she asked.

“don’t make me second guess my decision. be at the hotel by 9pm or im locking my door. i’ll send the details.” she agreed quickly and you hung up, holding your head in your hands while you ran through the previous conversation to look for any red flags.

-

“i mean honestly, ask a girl to dinner before filming a sex tape with her.” she rolled her eyes, smiling softly as you positioned the camera.

“is it recording?” she asked, biting her lip when you approached her.

“mhm.” she was cautious with putting her hands on your hips, this having been the first time she’d intentionally touched you, the other, being when she’s brushed past you when you’d opened the door.

“give them a show, baby.” she tugged on your shirt, clarifying what she meant but letting you take it off. you were stood in front of her, your back to the camera while she remained sitting, letting her hands drift to your clothed ass as you slowly peeled off your shirt. once it had been discarded to the side, your jeans followed shortly after, leaving you in your underwear.

“all for me?” she teased, commenting on the matching set as you turned towards the camera. she pulled you down onto her lap and pulled your hair back so that she could attach her lips to your neck. and when she did, she didn’t make an attempt to be gentle.

“mm.” you closed your eyes, enjoying the feeling of her bruising your skin, sucking and licking as you whimpered. subconsciously you began to grind your heat against her thigh, the thin fabric of your thong doing nothing to mask the harsh material of her jeans.

“so needy.” she whispered, loud enough for the microphone to pick it up though, and a whine followed.

“fuck.” she exhaled, before lifting you up, and placing you on the bed. she took her shirt off and hovered over you for a second, giving you the perfect view of her tits, moments from spilling out of her tight bra.

“like what you see?” you nodded, reaching behind her back to undo it before she halted your actions.

“not yet, give me a real answer.” her tone asserted a kind of dominance you weren’t used to. annoyingly easy to comply with.

“yes.” she wasn’t completely satisfied but gave way regardless. when she lowered herself onto you, you could feel the bulge in her jeans, shutting your eyes momentarily as she pressed herself against you.

“tell me what you want, babygirl.” she smirked, pulling your chin to face her while she waited for a response.

“i want it raw.” you weren’t hesitant to voice what you wanted and it turned her on.

“ask nicely, baby.” she teased and your rolled your eyes.

“fuck. me. please.” she smiled, but contemplated it for a second, her hands running up and down your naked body, doing everything to distract you from the conversation.

“do you deserve it?” she asked, the same teasing tone lacing her words.

“yes.” she chuckled at the confidence in your voice.

“and what makes you think that? you’re a little slut after all, aren’t you?” that made you go silent, the truth to her words making it difficult to counter.

“well? are you?” her hand was squeezing your chin again, forcing an answer out of you.

“yes.” it was said with resistance but still satisfied her. she slapped the side of your ass, eliciting a small jump.

“on your knees.” she ordered, letting your imagination complete the request. and when you were on your knees, in front of her, she gave no further instructions.

“go on, show me how much of a slut you are. and maybe i’ll give you what you want.” she shrugged, taking a sort of nonchalant stance as she waited for you to unbutton her jeans. when you pulled them down to reveal her strap, your eyes widened slightly at the sheer size.

“come on, you can take it.” she’s noticed the uncertainty in your expression. but when you took the tip in your mouth, and then finally the rest, she bunched up your hair and pushed you closer to her, the tip hitting the back of your throat. you gagged multiple times, your eyes going glossy and your pussy even wetter as you clenched on nothing, moaning around her strap.

“fuck, what a whore, huh?” you nodded quickly, doing almost anything to please her while she pulled on your hair, harshly, revealing the entire strap until she pushed it past your lips again, your saliva coating the base as you whined and cried. your muffled noises turning her on and she rested her head back, closing her eyes.

“that’s right, take it like a good girl.” her voice was sultry, and so seductive you could swear you were leaking from your heat. and when she was done with you sucking her strap, you thought your mouth would bruise. when she pulled it out of your mouth your saliva made it glisten in the dim lighting. the tears on your cheeks and drool on your chin was a sight for sore eyes and the camera had long been forgotten.

“was that slutty enough for you?” she narrowed her eyes when you stood up.

“watch your mouth, princess.” she threatened, moving to grasp your hips and push you onto the bed.

“i think i gotta show off that pretty ass of yours no?” she smirked, getting on top of you once she’d urged you to turn around. you used your elbows to prop yourself up as she unclasped your bra, letting your tits spill as her hands came to feel them up. your legs were spread wide and her knee came up to your heat, pressing lightly against your panties.

“billie, please.” the desperation in your words were pathetic, playing further into her ego.

“patience, sweet girl.” she let her hands wander down your body before resting, just below your waist, her fingers biting into your hips. you fought the urge to turn your head back, to see what she was doing, but all thoughts were silenced when you felt her silicone tip prodding at your entrance.

“you’re soaking, bet i could just slide into that tight little hole of yours.” the harsher she pressed the tip against your pussy, the filthier her words got, as if the teasing hadn’t been enough already. she knew what she was doing.

“please just do something!” you whined, and she contemplated making you beg for it.

“do what? i’m going to need you to specify, babe.” you could imagine her smirk, and you almost dropped your head in frustration.

“please fuck me.” she sighed in content of your response.

“well, since you said please.” and she was pushing her entire length into you, before she’d finished the sentence, disrupted by a moan.

“fuck.” your elbows gave out and you were gripping the sheets already, feeling her push herself further into you.

“so ready for me, i swear i can feel you clenching, pretty.” she didn’t really give you time to adjust before she started thrusting, agonisingly slow at first.

“billie.” your whines only fuelled her, but she responded with a light slap to you ass.

“try again.” she tutted, halting her movements for a moment.

“mommy? please?” she groaned in satisfaction before continuing her motions.

“that’s right, baby.” it didn’t take long for her actions to turn harsh and messy, your moans and whimpers making her feral.

“ y’like getting fucked like this? like a fuckin’ slut?” she grasped your hips pulling them towards her with every thrust, as you arched your back, pushing your ass against her lower abdomen.

“mhm.” your moans we’re muffled by the pillow you’d hurried your face into. but that response obviously didn’t satisfy her. she fisted you hair again, pulling your head away from the pillow so that you could answer her.

“i need an answer, babe.” she pulled out of you completely, leaving you clenching uncontrollably.

“yes.” your mouth was running dry, your breaths still staggered.

“yes what?” she was unbelievably persistent. she wouldn’t be able to get away with it if she wasn’t that fucking hot.

“yes mommy.” she let you fall with a small bounce when you landed, and she was back to abusing your pussy.

“all your other fans can’t compare can they?” you felt the pressure in your lower stomach building, as she filled you up with her strap.

“no.” you shook your head, unaware of your words and actions, only focusing on the feeling of her inside of you.

“tell me i’m more than a fan.” the camera was so long forgotten you spewed out words of agreement.

“you’re so much more.” your hands were roaming the sheets for some kind of solace as you felt your high approaching.

“are you gonna cum on my dick then? make a mess?” when you nodded, she moved her hand to your clit, pinching it with two of her fingers, before continuing to toy with it.

“fuck.” you could barely feel your legs as her thrusts became quicker but sloppy. and when her hands came to spread your legs wider, she hit deeper spots than you could’ve imagined, and you were releasing all other her strap.

“holy fuck.” she gasped, your heat, empty and aching when she pulled out.

“fuck that was insane.” your turned around, facing her, and she almost collapsed on your body.

“yeah?” the metal on her teeth glistened through her smirk.

“mhm” you confirmed, and she came down to kiss you, no hesitation in the matter whatsoever.

“i think i’ve earned the ‘more than a fan’ title, right?” you laughed, a smile forming on her lips when she heard it.

“yeah, you definitely did.” she pecked your lips again before she spoke.

“perfect, i don’t wanna be your fan anymore.”

request (kinda)

taglist: @adinda-eilish @ijustlovemaths @sweetcherriexs @jaxon-nathaniel-drake @mybluebossanova @diceroll65 @tothediner @st0nerlesb0 @bilssturns @london-uhmye @bxllxebxtch @tan1shere @babybornbluenow @greenbttrflyy @asterisk-eyes

[thepoisonroom]

i spent months of my life selling books and all i got was this stupid encyclopedic knowledge of seemingly innocuous titles that cryptofascists cream themselves over

[blueberrypancakesworld]

Remember us all

Caracalla x wife!reader

warning : hurt/comfort, emotional, reader is pregnant, mention murder and death, angst, kissing, cuddling

Summary: With the death of Geta, which she had witnessed, terrified for her life and that of her husband, her husband seemed to be lost. Macrinus, who could so easily take over Rome, represented a real-life nightmare for the imperial family. But in all this horror, Caracalla seemed to come back to her from his madness because their love for each other simply had to heal him.

info : After weeks or months I returned with another Caracalla one-shot. Have fun, it's been a long time since I wrote for the sweet and now I wish you a lot of fun :)

masterlist

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They all had a dream of Rome.

They wanted to make Rome even bigger and wider. One battle after another would have been fought, they would have raised the flag of the empire and the three of them would have been the rulers of the world.

From the moment she had been introduced to the two emperors, when she had seen the two blond young men whose appearance was godlike, something in her had fallen for them, especially the younger one.

It was the kind only given by gods, a togetherness of their own, a family the two formed.

The two together had defied everything to wear the golden crowns and made the old dream of Rome so tangible.

Above all they were two people who were also fond of her, the hours she had spent with Geta, looking over maps together at the table, drinking wine together and practising speaking in front of the senate and the people.

A man of politics and the art of attention, despite his age he was a good emperor, ,,As I love my brother, so I would give you my blessing if your heart desires him too" he had told her one evening as they both stood on the balcony looking out over the city.

Her embarrassed smile, however, spoke of wariness, even more time in Rome she had spent with Caracalla, ,,I would love nothing more than to share my life with him" she had replied, not realising what those words would lead to.

She spent every minute and hour she had free with the golzahn bearer, listening to his ideas for even more fights and battles, putting them down on paper or turning them into figures made of ceramics.

But above all she was impressed by his monkey, who had learnt to bring her berries when Caracalla gave an order, ,,Dundus likes you just as much as I like you my princess" he always called her, with a broad smile.

She was the princess for him, a princess from a distant empire that allied itself with Rome and accepted its flag, a political alliance that led to an unexpected love.

A love that only took a sun and moons to become a golden wedding of a size and class that Rome had not seen for decades, the marriage between Caracall and his beloved princess.

A marriage and an alliance of love and honour, two hearts beating for each other that were a perfect match.

It was his amusing manner that appealed to her, when worries about the future became too great and nightmares plagued her, it was he who cuddled up to her at night.

Caracalla who took her hand and entertained her with stories...while she brought him back to the now.

When his gaze of madness settled on hers and he recognised his wife, his Rome and his brother, he had his family back.

When he kissed her lips and felt her, tasted her, felt her heartbeat from the moment on their wedding night to the many days later when he would not let go of her.

He was like a sun that seemed to shine only for her, he was the one who loved her night after night, let himself be loved by her.

The news of her pregnancy only a few moons later surprised hardly anyone in the kingdom as songs and poems were already being spread about them both.

A pregnancy that moved even Geta to tears, ,,We are a family, with hope and future the gods seem and all to be gracious" he announced as the celebration in her honour began, Caracalla smiling proudly as he placed a hand covered in golden rings on her still flat stomach.

When his bright eyes looked into hers and she heard him say, ,,I am going to be a father, you are my wife, the mother of the child...I could not have had anything better" and he gave her a kiss, in a moment when he had never been as clear as on that day.

A day, however, that was unfortunately only a few months in the past and whenever she looked outside, Rome seemed to become more and more of a nightmare.

After Acacius' execution the people had gone mad but even she could not have changed her husband and brother-in-law's mind, not after such a great betrayal that had been committed.

A nightmare that didn't stop as she paced her room restlessly, her stomach no longer flat but slightly rounded, ,,Your family will take care of the nightmare, you will have a peaceful future my Helios" she said to her child, praying once more to the gods as she decided to return to them.

Despite the fact that she was supposed to stay away from the windows and the outside, she wanted to see them, her family, her husband and brother-in-law.

But she would never have imagined that the nightmare was so real, so close, so bloody and so devastating as she made her way from her room through the corridors of the palace.

Her scream rang through the palace as she saw the dying, help-seeking look on Geta's face as his body fell to the ground.

The blood spread around him like a pond and two men looked at her, one cool and waiting, the other excited and amused, ,,Empress just in time would you take care of your husband, someone has to take care of the mishap" Macrinus said and the blood dripped from his hands like a warning.

A warning that would be stained with her blood and that of Caracalla when he got his chance.

What had happened, he was predictable, he would have lost, he would have killed her, Caracalla and the heir...he was like a lion waiting for his chance to strike and until then she would have to watch out for Caracalla to turn the blade on her former ‘friend’ Macrinus.

The tears and weeping mingled with screams as she looked from the body of her brother-in-law to the knife in her husband's hands, ,,It's all mine at last!" Caracalla exclaimed happily and slowly made his way to her.

Her backing away from the blade, the help that came too late for Geta made a guilt burn inside her, ,,Ca-Caracalla...look at me we-we should clean you up" she said her voice shaky, fear occupying her senses as her trembling hand reached out for the blonde's.

To her relief, he looked at the sword almost immediately before throwing it to the ground, the sound making her flinch.

He didn't realise what he had done, what he had done to Geta, that he had killed his brother and that Macrinus was the revenge.

His hand was warm and sticky as she felt the still warm blood of Geta as she gasped for air and pressed her other hand to her stomach.

Praying silently to the gods to end this nightmare, ,,Are you unwell? It's all mine now, your emperor will take care of your suffering" he said encouragingly, stroking her cheek.

Playfully teasing the kiss he gave her, not knowing that the blood on his hands seemed like the punishment of the gods. Behind his maniacal sweetness and excitement, her love could be seen but the actions were his carnality.

The blood that now stained her too made her dizzy, but holding on to him for a moment she saw that the childish madness slumbered in his blue eyes, her husband was not there.

Her Caracalla was not with her, ,,It's-It's all right, we should...clean you up for your ascent" she tried to compose herself and pointed to the large washbasin in her room with two chairs in front of it.

His assent and nods of agreement were laced with approval as her hands poured the rose-scented water into the bowl, adding the water and seeing in the mirror how his eyes never left her form.

The madness flamed in the bright blue of his eyes, the broad amused grin as he saw this vision clear as the sun before him. The Rome for himself and her, just the two of them, just him, never with Geta as it seemed for the moment.

,,I will have games organised, laws passed and statues of your image made of gold erected" he spoke to her as his hands gripped hers, blood staining them again.

Blood she thought would be that of the birth of their child, not that of her brother-in-law and future uncle of the heir.

Trying to take the situation as calmly as she could, she began to gently clean his hands of the blood, ,,That's flattering my husband but...do-do you remember us?" she asked carefully, feeling his fingers twitch as he looked at the blood in the water.

The two of them danced with each other, played and courted each other, something they both did every day. Dancing together, holding each other, being one, a memory of them both created from the water of purity and the blood of death.

Seeing how in his mind he was struggling with madness, the curse that had gripped him for years, the blood that interested and amused him...a blood that suddenly made him look at her.

She saw in the blue eyes how something broke, how something disappeared, how hands tremblingly touched her stomach, he laid his head against her chest and she heard the bitter weeping.

Her attempts to calm him with kisses on his light head, her hands holding him and letting him cling to her helped little, little in the face of such a real horror of what he had done.

The trembling of his body as he clung to her whenever it caught up with him, whenever he realised what he had done in his delusion.

When the younger brother realised what a stain they both were, when the guilt consumed him and yet the slight relief that it wasn't his wife and child he could have killed.

As the flames of Rome became more and more conscious to him...and he realised that Rome was dependent on a mad child emperor and his pregnant wife with an unborn heir.

It was his nightmare, without his brother, dependent on her love not to slip into madness, he could do nothing but ask his wife, his princess for forgiveness. Because his love was all he could give her.

The bitter weeping which was interspersed with words begging for forgiveness that would not stop, ,,I am here, my heart...everything will be all right...for the three of us" it came slowly from her, not knowing if any other words would cause her own collapse.

As she could no longer hold back her own tears as she held her husband, held the unborn child and all of Rome seemed to fall around her, it would be up to them not to let the doom come over them all.

They would just have to remember each other, be there for each other and as long as their hearts beat for each other in remembrance, Macrinus had not won and Rome would see more days to come.

A promise for Geta, for Helios and the couple to themselves when she felt Caracalla's kiss as they held one another.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

@songbirdmunson , @bel0ved-heretic , @cottoncandiescupcakes , @snazzynacho , @abundance-of-fic-reblogs , @dropkicksskz , @multific , @fallout-girl219 , @k-yurieee , @eddie-munsons-mommy , @qardasngan , @sweeteststing , @myromanempire81 , @duck-duck-goose2 , @babey-fruit-bat , @urween , @pecxiebu , @starry-night-lover1 , @aegonsslut , @baby-im-urs

[seffen]

It's been a long time since they've been here.In fact, I've been cold to them for a long time. But recently, at my leisure, I decided to remember them, it was nice.

It's been a long time and I've been able to rethink a lot of the stories, but the main points in the story remain, and I'd like to tell them. But I strongly doubt that I have the patience to draw it all.

Shamura is still one of my favorites. I wanted to make him the most controversial character. I drew his image when there was still no crown on his head.

I remember Shawmura saying he caught his crown in a net, this prompted me to headcanon that his crown was not meant for him. I've had this headcanon for a very long time, and in the early artwork you can see that Shawarma uses a regular spear and doesn't use the crown due to the fact that he couldn't quite curb it. But it's worth saying that later on he was able to curb it like no mortal would be able to. I can say that Sharuma had very high self-esteem when he was young.

Callamar, I think he's getting unduly neglected. And I don't like that he's portrayed solely as a coward. I like that he can be very cunning and very self-loving. And I wanted to revisit one point in his story. I wrote earlier that he was relatively at ease with the role of a mortal, but now I think that's not true. To explain, Kallamar as well as Leshy and Narinder were gods from childhood, from early childhood, because of this their adaptation was the most difficult and one could say unbearable. Imagine being on top all your life and losing everything in one moment, it's very difficult and the only happy moment is that Kallamar is alive.

And I can also see that Kallamar has various hobbies that would seem strange or creepy to many people and all of them would be about bodies and their insides. Given that Kallamar personified disease he had a lot of medical knowledge, simply because his region was the most commonly affected by it, and because Kallamar was very hard to please as a god. But we should not forget that he was primarily a god of disease, not medicine. Under him, in general, it is better not to bring up these topics at all or risk repeating the experience of Tom Cardy's poor guy from Red Flags.

I love Hekat. I share those who see her as strong, independent and very responsible. The way in the game itself she was ahead of all her brothers as if taking everything upon herself after Shamura received the head grass. Also, according to her headcanon, she received her crown like Sharuma already at a conscious age and she managed to live in the settlement and was a loyal follower. This experience, as for me, made her more down to earth, even though her character was hot-tempered.

If we talk about her life before the crown, then even before that Hecate was a respected woman. She was one of the students, and her word was very important. Because of this, she was also very popular among men, although none of her marriages were successful, and not because of bad relationships. Those years were very difficult times for the gods and this also affected the followers. You can say that there were difficulties with survival.

Now, you could say she is on a well-deserved vacation, although at first she helped her brothers adapt for some time, but still, despite how difficult it was for them, they are no longer children and she is tired of dragging them by the hand everywhere.

Well, and Leshy, the youngest. I can't say anything new. Those who have seen it before know that in my universe he has a daughter from a yellow cat. I would like to devote more time to his spouse. Something that I would also rewrite and change my mind a bunch of times. He is definitely not as simple as he seems. I had an idea with a breakup, but it is too large-scale and I repeat that I am not sure that I can implement it. I can say that the cat is not local and has not lived in the lands of the ancient faith for most of his life, he came from distant islands that are his native home. The main reason why he swam away from Tula is that he is wanted there and if he is caught, he faces capital punishment.

I guess that's all for now. I would write more, but there's already a lot of text here.

And there is no Narinder here. I just didn't want to draw him, maybe next time.

[tricoloreddango]

Yandere Phainon sabotaging reader’s relationship

contents: gaslighting / gender neutral reader / mention of the death of the readers’s cat/ word count: 1k

The relationship you had with your boyfriend might not have been the most exciting, but you thought of it as satisfying enough… just the fact it let you live a stable and predictable life was enough to be comforting and not leave you lonely. Your relationship hasn’t started a long time ago, but you assumed it was going into a right direction.

However, Phainon wasn’t having it. He’s been consistently trying to prove it to you that you have settled down just for a bare minimum or has been bringing up things that (in his humble opinion) were red flags. This wasn’t any different when you invited Phainon over for tea.

He looked around the kitchen, noticing a spill of coffee beans on the counter. “Is this his mess?”

You nodded. “Yes, I’m sure he’d clean it any other day. He just had to leave early for work,” you shrugged. You decided to change the topic, before Phainon would start telling you how you shouldn’t have to clean up after your own boyfriend. It was an innocent mistake from him, as he usually did his share of work. Phainon would still probably say something along the lines of “Even if, this is just the beginning—”

“He bought me flowers today,” you bragged to your visitor, sounding happy—not expecting your friend to soon make you lose that feeling. “What flowers did he give you?” he asked curious, smiling for your enthusiasm. “Roses,” you responded.

Suddenly, your friend looked disappointed, killing your smile. “Roses? Look, it’s nice he got you flowers. But aren’t peonies your favorite flowers?”

“Yes, but… he still didn’t have to give me any outside of occasions,” you muttered.

Phainon disagreed, “No, no. If he was buying them he might as well had picked the ones you like. It means he doesn’t really care about what you want but about what he wants and expects you to be grateful. Roses are so cliche and boring. He’s not romantic in any way.”

The look of uncertainty, wondering if you should believe his words, didn’t discourage Phainon. He was ready to prove you wrong furthermore your conversation. “Well… I can always tell him that. I’m sure he’ll understand and will make sure to get me the right ones the next time? He just didn’t know my favorite.” You smiled encouragingly, hoping your friend will agree.

He didn’t. He was ready to debunk your claim. “You really think he’ll listen? If he cared, he’d have asked you about your likes first. Also, don’t you remember when you asked to help you fix a tap? He didn’t,” he said with a slight disgust.

“Yes, but he was tired! He promised me he’d do it tomorrow, I just managed to do it before him,” your voice was now frustrated. Why was he so not understanding?

“I doubt that. You had to ask him to not tighten jar lids multiple times before he eventually had stopped, or had to ask him to stop putting jars on a shelf too high for you. He clearly doesn’t care about your boundaries. Don’t you remember his reaction? You said he raised his voice at you, didn’t you?” he said with worry.

“Right, but it’s because I asked him when he was busy and I wouldn’t stop interrupting—”

“My friend,” Phainon put a hand on your shoulder, his face all soft and apologetic you had to deal with such a bad man. “Even if busy, a right boyfriend wouldn’t raise his voice, as it signals anger issues if he’s snapping at something so simple. He would have remembered to not tighten lids in the first place, and be considerate of you having less strength or you being shorter. A boyfriend who cares is the boyfriend who knows you well.”

Phainon’s words were getting to you slowly, making you have second thoughts. What if you were naive and didn’t notice signs? You trusted Phainon, he’s never given you a reason to sabotage your happiness, so surely there must be some truth to his words… which doesn’t mean hearing it all was easy. You felt self conscious at the idea of letting yourself end up in such a bad relationship or being used. Tears blurrier your vision, threatening to fall.

“But… when I ended up losing my cat, he was there to comfort me! He definitely cares! He listened to me and did things for me so I could rest! He wouldn’t do that if he didn’t!”

Phainon shook his head gently, making his voice more serious, “He was using affection to get you attached in your vulnerable moments. That has to be true, considering he normally doesn’t show you much affection? He even acts all distant.”

“He’s just not that comfortable with being vulnerable, cause he had a difficult childhood! He still gets adjusted to opening up to me but we’re getting there!” you protested, but your efforts were starting to feel useless in your perspective. Phainon might really be right—if he didn’t mind easily showing you affection during your sad day, why wouldn’t he do so any other time?

“Emotionally unavailable people don’t change. They make relationships one sided! Aren’t you tired of making yourself vulnerable while he doesn’t give you anything in return?” he scolded gently, pulling you into his arms when you were finally crying. You didn’t protest, letting him rub your back. Phainon has never let you down, unlike your boyfriend, apparently. “I think you just want to ‘fix’ him. Yet this isn’t your role. You should find someone who makes you happy, rather than someone that you have to be responsible for! Relationship should make your life easier, not burdening. You have to say so many ‘buts’ to defend him; that should be enough concerning,” he added, his voice made cashmere to comfort you.

He felt all joy and relief when you ended up nodding into his chest. He’ll gladly show you what a boyfriend model should be, as no way in any universe he’d let you be with someone else. Phainon wholeheartedly believed that only he was meant for you, and that you can be the happiest with him only—he may as well be your soulmate.

Didn’t he know your needs the most? You could ask him what he thinks you’ve eaten yesterday and he’d have no problem guessing. You weren’t aware of the extent of his knowledge about you.

[firealder2005]

I honestly don’t post about any sports all that often. But this Super Bowl compelled me to write this.

Now, right out the gate I will tell you I am a KC Chiefs fan. I was born one. I am a third-generation fan, going back to my grandpa who picked them at 19 when they were a godawful team and barely televised through my mom’s childhood, because only the good teams were televised then — so if they could watch them, it was to watch them get POUNDED.

I got to watch them win a Super Bowl after a 50 year drought. It was an exhilarating feeling, especially since I was constantly picked on at school by a classmate because of my team (he would go out of his way to harass me whenever his team — Ravens, btw — beat the Chiefs. And he was blissfully quiet the whole day after).

I got to see them win another one two years ago, in the affectionately nicknamed Kelce Bowl because of the Kelce brothers playing against each other. That was a fun year.

And another one after that.

Am I all that cut up about them losing this year?

No. I am not. Because I know it’s just a game. The dudebros need to chill out fr.

But I also know that this year…it wasn’t quite just a game, either. There’s other forces at play.

I honestly had no idea that some of the major Chiefs players supported trump until today. Just before I started writing this, in fact. I didn’t know trump wanted them to win either.

There was a bad taste in my mouth when I found that out.

I don’t consider myself to be a fanatic fan. But I am a proud fan. Someone once called me a bandwagon and I got offended.

But. But.

I am not a fan of this. Of the support and cozying up to of fascism, racism, queerphobia, you name it. It boggles my mind too because there are Black players on the Chiefs, there are Black players who CARRY the NFL’s legacy on their backs, and to support the trump administration is to take away their support.

You know what I am a fan of?

The political message of Kendrick Lamar’s halftime show.

I have never listened to any of Kendrick’s discography. I’ve never really been all that into hip hop or rap (my whiteness is showing I know).

Honestly, while I was watching, a lot of what was going on flew over my head. And I also had a hard time hearing the lyrics 🫣 again, not used to this genre of music 😅

But that’s what I thank tumblr for. Tumblr always has a way of bringing the unknown into the spotlight, and expanding my own knowledge on it.

I am very much not knowledgeable on the Black history surrounding Kendrick’s performance. But looking back, with a fresh set of eyes, what I do know and have put in effort to learn starts to be clear.

And I think it was genius. I think Kendrick Lamar’s performance is what saved this Super Bowl for me because I am vastly disappointed in my team right now, and still would have been even if they won.

I do not begrudge the Eagles their win. After all, this was a rematch 😜 Only fair you have your time to shine.

But in all seriousness, I think I prefer a loss to a win simply because I would not be able to enjoy that win knowing what I do now.

Besides. if it comes with the bonus of trump’s night being ruined? having to live with spending TAXPAYER MONEY (my money!!) to go and watch the game only to leave halfway through because Kendrick called him out? good. I can handle the sidelong taunts about the Chiefs and their bad decisions. I am mature enough to see that.

I am mature enough to see that an Eagles win, packed with Kendrick Lamar ripping the right a new one, is a win for us all — Chiefs fans included.

The next four years will be tough. But with such a spectacular performance? The trans flag? The Palestine and Sudan flag? Everything?

I think we have what we need to keep fighting. Kendrick, Chappell Roan, Lady Gaga, all of these artists lending their voices to support those who will be grievously impacted by what comes next is so important, especially at events like the Grammies and the Super Bowl. It shows that people care.

It shows that we can always care.

It’s just a game, yeah. But now it’s so much more.

[michanvalentine]

I don’t mean to offend anyone—everyone is free to appreciate what they like. But the comparison comes naturally when I talk about my preferences and what I enjoy in the vampire spawn path rather than the ascendant vampire one.

As I already mentioned in another post, by becoming a full vampire—or rather, a new and 'improved' one-of-a-kind vampire—Astarion, in my opinion, fully embraces his monstrous side and lets go of the remaining human traits in him. So, his way of loving Tav/Durge becomes that of an ascendant vampire, lacking some of the qualities we’re used to in typical relationships. And that’s precisely what I love about the vampire spawn path—the idea of reclaiming life, reconnecting with others, and seeking out all those aspects that once characterized his existence as just another elf (with the necessary exceptions, of course—he’s still a sneaky bloodsucker xD).

I’ve noticed, for example, that Ascendant Astarion has a very strong sense of protection toward Tav/Durge, his vampire spawn. He feels almost obligated to keep Tav/Durge safe—it’s his responsibility. I wonder if he does it as a creator or as a lover. After all, the player completely surrenders to him, gives him everything—even their own life. (Their life, for fuck’s sake! In the end, the ascendant vampire kills Tav/Durge—he takes their life. Sure, he gives them another one, but that doesn’t change the fact that he takes it. And that’s another thing I personally find unacceptable because I fight every day to live. I want to live. My life is everything—it’s precious. The idea of someone taking it from me, just for the sake of control, is unthinkable. Especially when you should love me unconditionally, for who I am and not for who you want me to be. Of course, in an evil playthrough, it makes sense for Tav/Durge to want to become a vampire, but it's not mandatory. And the fact that the relationship can't continue otherwise is a red flag for me—one that I don't even think has to do with Ascendant Astarion's fear of losing Tav/Durge. After all, if they refuse the transformation, he is the one who ends the relationship and "loses" them. But of course, I'm rambling).

Anyway, back to the point—there are even moments where the ascendant vampire reinforces this concept, such as during the second encounter with Araj Oblodra. There, he explicitly states that he will protect Tav/Durge if necessary. Now, I absolutely understand the appeal of this scenario. Really, it seems incredibly romantic. But…

…it’s a concept that hits close to home for me, because of my family history. The responsibility to protect someone belongs to parents. Parents have a duty to protect their children. A fully grown, well-adjusted adult doesn’t need protection, nor should they seek it from someone else—especially not from their partner. I say this resonates with me because, at one time, I expected this from my husband. But in doing so, I placed a responsibility on him that wasn’t actually his. I burdened him with a role that wasn’t his to carry. I had to work through this, understand the mechanism, trace it back to its origin, and dismantle it as best I could—restoring our relationship to the right balance. One of equality. Because automatically, the one being protected is subordinated to the protector.

Now, this doesn’t mean we shouldn’t support or stand by each other when needed, of course! The point is that it should be a mutual responsibility, not a one-sided one. And that ties directly back to vampire spawn Astarion, who, the morning after the graveyard scene, explicitly talks about this—about being equal partners. Same rights, same responsibilities. And how, among the various dialogue choices, the developers inserted a little trap: “I’ll always keep you safe so you’ll never need the powers of an ascendant vampire.” Sneaky! I hate that line! Just as spawn Astarion hates it—and rightfully so! If we are equals, if we are true partners, then you should not act as my protector. You should simply stand by my side, damn it! Spawn Astarion is perfectly capable of defending himself—he’s not weak, not small, and most importantly, he’s not a child. He is an adult reclaiming all his rights as an adult. He doesn’t need a babysitter.

Just like I, as a player, don’t need one. And maybe, because of my personal experience, that’s why I don’t find it appealing or romantic that Ascendant Astarion wants to protect me. I don’t need it. I function just fine on my own. I am perfectly capable of defending myself. I worked hard to regain that right and that freedom.

By the way, I’d also love to remind Ascendant Astarion that he didn’t end up in that position by chance. I was the one who guided him there throughout the game. All the more reason he should know that I don’t need protecting—I can kick ass just fine on my own.

[iiheartarc]

MY TAKE ON THE CAITVI DISCOURSE

total wordcount: 1591

I will say that I've briefly commented on their dynamic in the past, but it was worded really badly so I feel like I need to defend my writing skills a little bit as well with this, but that's just a sidenote. 💀

I think what a lot of people are missing when people do criticise CaitVi is that they aren't necessarily hating on the ship, it's what writing choices have done to it.

I'm not even going to even say I'm a CaitVi hater, I'm not (S1 CaitVi my beloved, you deserved better), but I do think the choices that writers made this season heavily effected how audiences portrayed the ship, even including myself.

Idk I hope this insight might give some people more perspective on why CaitVi became so hated in this season, people rlly need to start looking at both sides and not taking criticism as a personal attack. It really could've been avoided too if the writers had added more time or extended the series onto a third season, but that's another issue on its own.

1. Caitlyn hits Vi

I really don't get why people are so quick to defend Caitlyn on this one, especially considering the amount of hate Vi got when she hit Powder. Are both inexcusable? Yes. But I do think that the situation is a little different when it's a fifteen year old child who had just witnessed the death of her entire family and a twenty something year old woman who took out her anger and grief on the woman she loved because she blocked her shot.

I do think that people also do ignore the immense amount of trauma that Caitlyn suffered at the hand of Jinx, but unlike when Vi 'abandoned' Powder, (again, that's a whole other conversation, we know she was not abandoned), Vi was not that direct source of anguish to Caitlyn the way Powder was to Vi. (Pls lmk if you want me to expand further on this)

Again, not excusing Vi hitting Powder, I'm pointing out the differences.

It's then also incredibly tone deaf when Caitlyn hits her on two more occasions with the same gun, the third time being played off as a joke. It really doesn't come off well, especially when Vi had been a victim of police-brutality even before the abuse she faced at the hands of the enforcers in Stillwater.

And then, even after all this, it's never addressed. It's brushed over, like Vi's entire trauma in the show, the most we get is Caitlyn brushing her hand over Vi's abdomen in the cell scene. Again, can be taken as an apology, but I think that for some very specific things (like hitting your romantic partner), verbal apologies do need to be made in order to communicate healthily and somewhat build a healthier relationship.

I don't really want to talk about the abusive implications of this, because I don't think I'm someone who can talk about it with a full understanding because that's something I've fortunately never been through, but the blatant disregard and shunning of abuse survivors when they pull up the red flags raised because of this is disgusting. In real life, or if it had even been someone else in the show, if the ship had been a heterosexual relationship, people would call Caitlyn an abuser and would be outraged that Vi had been paired with her in the end. But I digress.

1. The cell sex scene

Initially I hadn't been too bothered about this when I had first watched the episode, but when you really think about it, it shouldn't have happened. Hell, they could've had sex in Caitlyn's office and half of the criticism wouldn't have happened, the ship wouldn't be so hated and the fandom wouldn't be half as divided as it is now (from what I've seen).

First and foremost, the cell.

All I can say is wtf. It was such a poor choice it's actually unfathomable to me now. I don't know why the writers thought that it'd be a good idea for Caitlyn and Vi to have their first time in a jail cell, not only the one Jinx had been locked in, but the one Vi had herself been locked in for what we can assume to be hours. The place of her abuse should not be somewhere where the writers could possibly think would be a suitable for a victim to have such an intimate moment with her partner.

Then there's the fact that Vi had looked to have had some sort of breakdown, we see she's sh and there are literal crates in the wall from where she punched it as well as her knuckles bleeding. As soon as she sees Caitlyn, there's a parallel to when they first met, to when Vi is quite literally caged. She's clearly not in the right state of mind, and so when the scene eventually happens it inevitably comes off as wrong because Vi is incredibly emotionally vulnerable in that moment.

"But Vi initiated it!" That still doesn't make it okay. I do think that this also came with an issue of timing, but then again, as I mentioned earlier, it literally could've been in the office as they argued and it would've been recieved so much better then the cell scene was. Vi wasn't breaking down, she wasn't locked in a reminder of the abuse she faced and her sister hadn't just ran off to do goodness knows what (in Vi's POV, us as the audience know exactly what she's about to do). They could've even have it fade to black and cut to the next scene tangled in bed doing whatever they would've been doing in the cell, Vi would assumably have had time to calm down, would be having sex in a warm and safe environment, and guess what? The audience would've been even happier.

Sure there would've been criticism, but Vi could literally save a thousand babies and adopt them all and still face hate, because a lot of the hate is being directed to Vi too because of the situation with Jinx. That, again, is a whole other situation.

3. "Dirt Under Your Nails"

Again, for the love of god, there can be so many takeaways from this sentence but do not be surprised that people didn't like it. I didn't, it made me cringe horribly.

And before people throw 'media literacy is dead', this whole post (practically essay), is analysing a piece of media that I love. To be literate, you can draw different interpretations and conclusions and that's exactly what I'm doing. It's like saying literacy is dead if two people were to disagree on what the meaning of Macbeth's quote 'I am in blood' meant.

I digress.

I think the main issue here is the class difference between Vi and Cait. Caitlyn is from the aristocracy, a direct heir to a position of power in Piltover, while Vi is lower class, effected indefinitely by growing up in poverty. Even though she grew up as Vander's kid, they were still 'scraping for scraps'. The wealth margin between the two is almost immeasurable, and with the difference in money comes a difference in experiences, as we - the audiences - know.

It especially comes off wrong considering the class tensions and political themes heavily focussed on within the first season. The conflict between Piltover and Zaun, the abuse of power and exploitation of Zaunites by both topside and the chembarons, the prevalence of police brutality on the streets of the Undercity. Again, Vi is someone who is directly effected by this, while Caitlyn came into this blissfully naïve. She did learn yes, and in s1 she was so determined to help, but when then this progress reverts into her calling zaunites 'animals' and using the grey as a weapon, it again makes Vi's words feel uncomfortable.

Again, I think this was a massive timing issue, I would've love to see Caitlyn succumb fully to a villain arc. It would've been so interesting to delve into.

I think Vi has always had the image of herself that she'll always be viewed as less by Piltover, that she herself views herself as less. She says it herself to Vander in s1 ep2 while they're on the bridge, "I grew up knowing I'm less than them." So when she then says as her final words in the show, "I'm the dirt under your nails" obviously, that's going to come across as tacky.

People are free to think of romantic connotations for this, I won't stop you, but when you think about how the show was so focussed on class tensions, police brutality, oppression and exploitation, it doesn't come off right. Idk, that's what got me so interested with the show in the first place, the way these themes were explored so deeply but subtly in a way that didn't feel forced, so Vi's words really rubbed me the wrong way.

Conclusion

So I hope everyone that read somewhat gets where I'm coming from, this was my attempt to try and explain what I think needed to be, badly. Again, you can like the ship, I'm not saying I don't, but it also needs to be acknowledged that there is so many things that could've been worked on properly, done properly or addressed properly, and ignoring criticism won't help these issues to be fixed in the future.

Feel free to ask any questions and thanks for reading this long ass rant :)

[crimson-and-clover-1717]

our flag means death#OP I'm sending you a flower bouquet#i actually love re-watching the pilot because everything Stede said is 100% right and as Ed later observes he has piracy figured out AND#dares to do something original - a lot of what Stede says seems naive or said out of jealousy (regarding the board party) but his true#motivation is always kindness - and the narrative never punishes him for being kind and hopeful his method totally works and improves the#lives of everyone on his crew and others who are choosing to embrace it. we need more shows that have kindness in their core especially now#knives has opinions

All of this. And watching the pilot after understanding the rest of the show is so rewarding. Because you know Stede’s philosophy is going to work. Even when he’s sobbing on the bow of the ship, he manages that little nod and ‘My family’s here now, at sea,’ and then goes and reads the people he knew were planning to kill him a story. That bloody story saved him. ‘Shall we kill Captain?’ /‘Not until, we know the end of the fairytale he’s reading us at bedtime.’ I’ve been ill most of the weekend, and watched the pilot yesterday as a distraction, and just cried my eyes out afterwards. Because Stede Bonnet.

I agree with this. I never think Stede is acting on knowledge though. It’s intuition. He knows what he likes and presumes others might too - but he is very good at knowing which characters would benefit from his ideas, and those that would never be receptive to it. His childhood taught him that.

And it’s totally about Stede too, which is why I hope he gives himself the same grace eventually. Because he has trauma and is an absolute sweetheart. Yet at this point in the story, he thinks he’s an idiot and a monster. This is what Stede does though. Counsels others before himself. I do think he finds healing in helping others get what he never had. So he saves himself by saving others, but he needs to not lose sight of himself in the process.

But that’s the wonder of Stede Bonnet, isn’t it? And why he intuitively, instinctively, and immediately understands Ed also.

Stede sees straight through the Blackbeard facade right to the sweetheart that is Ed.

One day, Stede will give himself the same grace.

[pkmnn]

GOOGENDER/SLIMEGENDER/OOZEGENDER/WHATEVERRR

slapped this together real quick bc i couldnt find anything that fit what i was looking for ToT not greatttt quality but like i said. slapped together real quick.

a xenogender relating to oozes, slimes, goos, gunks, etc. colors are traditional slime colors from rpgs (tabletop and otherwise). no particular meanings besides that.

[salt-baby]

at some point in disability you stop wanting to "get better" and this is just really hard for able bodied people to understand for some reason

[arsenicflame]

Izzy Hands can have a little "thinking hes incapable of feeling love" as a treat (for me. the treat is for me)

[volitioncheck]

i think i wouldn’t hate disco elysium’s collage mode nearly as much if it weren’t for 1) the way that it was marketed in such a tasteless, soulless manner, let alone the fact that it was a last ditch distraction from a dead on its feet studio piloted by dumbass thieving execs and released on the day of the court declaration, and 2) those dumbass fucking stickers

like if it had been included with the base game from the start and had been titled something a bit more tasteful and in-line with how i would have liked the feature to be marketed as— something like “exploration mode”, something that perhaps could only be unlocked after completing the game for the first time, AND didn’t have those stupid as hell visually and tonally incongruent with the artstyle stickers, i would have applauded it as a nice little bonus for being able to study and appreciate the 3d models and environments for reference.

[numum]

Any Eda, Raine, or Reada in that beautiful sketchbook of yours? And sorry about the bots stressing you out.

not in my traditional sketchbook, but i do have this raeda piece i never got around to finishing 🥺 plus an owl beast doodle

[zatna]

my zatanna is transfem btw