#but i feel like doing the above things helps sometimes keep you from being demotivated

[silverskye13]

this is just an artist thing

i have a piece that’s red and white and i spent 4 hours on

and i just did a 10 minute red and white doodle

why is it better. what is wrong with this hobby.

does this happen to you as well

do we artists suffer in tandem

It happens! Art Is A Process And Sometimes That Process Is Hell. You are definitely not suffering alone. This happens to me frequently, especially when hammering out my initial sketches for a drawing.

There can be a number of reasons for this phenomena, and all of them are interesting.

1. You were "warmed up" for the new piece but not for the original. Because of this, the lines seem to flow better, it's less of a struggle to get going, or to produce something good. In the same way stretching before a run makes the workout easier, doing a second drawing after the first tends to make the process flow easier, and gives you better work

2. The doodle is still a sketch, and therefore in a state of change more pleasing to your eye, while the rendered piece is static. This is the same reason people often think their sketches have more movement than their finished artworks. When something is a sketch, your lines are looser and more subjective, and so your eye can pick which ones it thinks make the piece better. The trick to rendering is figuring out which of those lines are worth keeping to maintain your movement. If you have problems with this jump from sketch to lineart, or sketch to render, do multiple passes at cleaner sketch lines instead of jumping straight to lineart. Or render your colors under your sketch layer, and tighten the drawing slowly from there.

3. The composition of the sketch is better than the drawing. Maybe the render was a good idea in your head, but it just could've been better if the arms were a little to the left, or the body positioned a different way. Give your new doodle a really good squint, and try to pinpoint what about it you like so much. Is it the positioning of your main subject? Is it a specific movement to the head and shoulders? Is it the suggestion [or lack thereof] of a background? Try zooming out on both your sketch and your render, and looking at only the broad shapes.

4. Art is hard, that's just the way it be. Maybe the difference is ephemeral and unexplainable. The art gods blessed one and not the other. Remember that neither piece was a waste of time. You learned something from the first that you very well may have applied to the second unknowingly. But at the very least, you've learned there is something about the first piece you don't like quite as much as the second. Every moment you've used between the two are stepping stones in your process. You've got this! Don't be discouraged by the disparity. Take it as the sign you're learning something.

You're doing great and I believe in you :3

[wered0gs]

I haven't seen a lot of discussion about RSD when it comes to ADHD discussions, so I thought I would do the honors since it's been affecting me for many years and I'd like people to know more about it!

I have had a diagnosis for ADHD but was never told- instead learning I had autism through therapy but still having some behaviors that I could never explain that just Happened.

I learned I had ADHD over the summer, and with that, severe rejection sensitive dysphoria.

before reading, please keep in mind that this is mostly talking from personal experience and some skimmed research! not experiencing RSD doesn't mean you do/don't have ADHD, and it may not appear like how it appeared for me. I don't only have autism + adhd either, so those may also contribute to any differences! ^^

RSD is the immense emotional pain after being criticized, rejected, or even teased (ignore my misspell in the panel). This rejection can be real or perceived, and we react like this because it hurts.

The pain can manifest as aggression, bringing on symptoms of depression (thoughts of s/h, isolation, demotivation, etc) and anxiety/panic attacks.

it can cause physical aliments like the above. For me, it causes my heartrate to skyrocket, heart palpitations, the feeling of being in a crisis, and extreme shaking to occur along with stomach pain.

(In fact, right now I'm going through it because making a post talking about this, despite having & dealing with it, makes me scared of other's opinions on it.)

RSD can also take the form of avoiding situations, people, or conversations where rejection or criticism is very possible.

Like other types of dysphoria, it is out of our control and hard to manage. It can last from days to weeks to months, all depending on both the trigger* and the individual.

I had a RSD episode that was on-and-off for a little over a year or two; getting more tame and bearable as it slowly drifted and stopped haunting my mind with the incident.

Compared to the other times my RSD was set off, this moment was a rather big moment in my life and ended up permanently changing me moving forward - which can be the reason why it lasted so long.

Despite how unbearable it can get, there are some ways to cope with it & lessen the effect it has.

Communicate - If you need time to process something that's told to you, you should say so (as difficult as it is). Tell the person(s) involved about your RSD, how you need time to digest information like this and take some time to relax. Trying to respond to the information while going through the head of the dysphoria will be very rough and might not be what you truly want to say.

Distract - This is really useful for me personally! Do something that grabs your attention or occupies your mind. One of RSD's main symptoms is rumination, thinking of something over and over again. I usually listen to music, draw, or play a game that won't frustrate me - like minecraft! (i'd say rain world but some of you would call me a maniac /lhj)

Perspective - This may require some communication, but it can really help and connect with others. See what the involved people thought / perceived, explain, talk. This doesn't always have the chance to end in rainbows and rekindling but at least you understand. Sometimes simply hearing the person explain their own side is enough to ease my RSD, being able to have someone explain themselves to me so i can understand them better.

I also wanna point out the "don't take it personally" thing that people try to use to deal with it isn't something i agree with since we're going to take it personally at first regardless. Later on, not really, but you're trying to cope with the symptoms... telling someone (or yourself) that they're too sensitive & over-reacting is the worse thing you could do.

With time, you can even begin to build up your 'armor' and be able to sustain yourself in situations you might get hurt in. Of course, some things may be able to sneak past and hurt you more than you expect, but at the end of the day, you're trying your best to go about it the best you can while taking so many blows. you're doing great.

OK i dont have a lot more to add so if anyone else would like to talk about their experiences, please feel free! Character showcased here was my beloved fursona Shiki! i'm just a little neurodivergent + black artist from new york :]

hope you enjoyed it! sorry for the long post </3

[charmedreincarnation]

Baeee I need ur help. So I be manifesting, right and then I feel so confident in my abilities and then I feel doubt. But not any regular doubt, it’s a doubt where I feel like I’m not doing enough. Do u have any tips of banishing that doubt and becoming more believing of my own abilities and that creation is finished? Sometimes the doubts make me demotivated and make me feel like I can’t manifest

Hi bae! I just want to say firstly, it's important to recognize that feeling doubt in our abilities is perfectly normal and is part of the natural cycle of manifesting. It's okay to feel this way and it's a sign that you're actively engaged in your manifesting process.

So if you're feeling this doubt, one of the most important things you can do is to start practicing self-love and self-care. Make time to rest and recharge after each manifesting session, so that your mind and body have time to adjust and process what you've been doing. For me personally constantly trying to manifest at the beginning of my journey and the frustration I faced could be draining and took a toll on me, If you notice you’re at this spot it’s okay to take a mental break !

Additionally, what really helped speed up my process is learning about Neville Goddard.. totally optional, the law exists with or without him but imo it may help to read up on Neville Goddard's writings on the Law of Attraction. Understanding how the law works can help you to become more trusting in your ability to manifest what you want in your life. If you need help understanding this concept, there are many online resources that can provide insight into how it works. Neville's books are also great sources of inspiration and insight.

Finally, in order to banish the doubts, it's important to stay focused on the present moment and on what you have already achieved in your journey so far. Celebrate every small success, no matter how insignificant it may seem, and use that as motivation to keep going forward. When we focus on the present and on our successes, it can help us to feel more confident in our ability to manifest our goals. Think of all the stuff you have already manifested no matter how big or small. Remember their is a linear concept of manifesting and it’s as easy to manifest 5 dollars as it is one billion. Celebrate your small success and acknowledge that you can do the same with “bigger” ones as easily!

I also wanted to add this because most of our doubts come from the time it takes for us to see our desires. Time, as we commonly understand it, is linear and in one direction, moving from past to present to future. We measure this movement with clocks and calendars, and often, these also dictate how we plan our lives. But what if these measurements and prescriptions are just arbitrary measures that limit us from understanding the full richness of life?

Instead, let’s consider thinking about time differently. We have all heard the saying that “it’s all about being in the present moment”. What this means is that the present moment is all that truly matters and exists, while the past and future are just abstractions that our minds create. This idea necessitates that we are free to create our own reality, rather than having it be predetermined by some invented set of rules.

When we start to look at things this way, we can also then see how our desire is always contained within us and not something that we need to wait for or hope to acquire in some distant future. Instead of being dependent on some concept of time, we can tap into our natural power and strength to manifest our desires whenever we are ready.

Finally, let’s consider 4D versus 3D concepts of time. 3D thinking is when we view time as linear and unidirectional, as described above. 4D thinking, however, takes into account multiple levels of reality and allows us to exist in different points in time simultaneously. Thus, going beyond the limits of what we once thought was possible to imagine a bigger world of more possibilities.

To sum up, time does not really exist outside of our perceptions. It is up to us to recognize the beauty and complexity of life by embracing the present moment and our own unique desires. Our thoughts can generally be broken down into either a 3D or 4D construct of time and these distinctions will determine how we experience our reality. By shifting our mindset away from the traditional linear view of time, we can open ourselves up to understanding more of what life has to offer. So you don’t need to doubt because it’s already yours.

Too long didn’t read: if you're feeling doubt about your manifesting abilities or the process, remember that it is normal and natural. But don't let it discourage you from achieving what you want in life - remember to practice self-love and self-care, get familiar with Neville Goddard's writings on the Law of Attraction, and focus on the present moment and what you have already achieved so far. Lastly don’t forget, time doesn’t exist and you already have your desires so what are you waiting for asides from the fact you already have your desires??

[luvelylili]

48 hour challenge !!

i decided to try @zen-shu ‘s new 48 hour challenge!! i’ve never tried a loa challenge on tumblr, and i’ve seen so many people getting amazing results so here is my take:

backstory

my self concept is not perfect, i get my fair share of doubts & limiting beliefs, i have a lot of failed void attempts but, regardless of everything i always keep going. i believe in the law 100% and i’ve already managed to manifest many things for myself. something i need to work on the most is probably persisting and remaining in the state of knowing that the 3d will conform once i’ve claimed my desires in the 4d. therefore, these are the main pointers i will carry in my mind for the next 48 hours over which i will complete this challenge!!

what i will be manifesting

- clear skin.

my skin is prone to it’s up and down periods, but recently it’s been a little bit too down for my liking so i will be manifesting my pimples clearing up and just to have overall clearer and smoother skin!

- sleep paralysis.

as i mentioned above, entering the void state is something i desire but i haven’t had any success with the good old lie down and affirm method. sooo, i did my research and i found the sleep paralysis method which really interested me and caught my attention for being so easy and straightforward. sleep paralysis is a natural human body mechanism and not dangerous at all, so there’s nothing to be worried about!! it’s also a great tool for manifesting, shifting and entering the void state - all of which we love here :) therefore, i want to manifest having sleep paralysis regularly so that i can experiment with it and use it to my advantage.

- best case scenarios.

over the course of this weekend, im gonna have to be in some situations that i REALLY wish i didn’t have to but i can’t get out of going anymore sooo… anyways, when life give you lemons, you just affirm against unwanted circumstances, right? so that’s what i’ll be doing, whatever happens i’m just going to live firmly in my 4d (this is hard for me so i’m really setting this goal for myself and making a point to stick to this even when my emotions take over)

what i will be doing

- assuming i always manifest in 48 hours, or less.

aside from my affirmations, whenever i catch myself wavering or want to redirect my thoughts without pulling out my whole affirmations list, i will simply stop and affirm that i always manifest my desires easily and effortlessly in 48 hours.

- persist in the state of knowing.

this post, also from zen’s blog, is super helpful!! it really helped my mindset and works as a good pick-me-up for whenever i feel demotivated and start to have doubts about my desires, it helps to come here and be reminded that all that truly matters is the 4d.

- mental diet/affirming.

and last but certainly not least: we affirmate. i want to saturate my mind with my affirmations and create natural thought patterns that align with my desired state - the wish fulfilled. this will help me to live in the end, so i’ll be affirming all throughout the day. i sometimes overcomplicate affirming because i have some law of attraction baggage in which i sometimes think i need to feel my affirmations and i get stressed out when i’m just repeating my affirmations in my thoughts and think i’m doing it wrong? there is no wrong way to manifest, i don’t have to feel or even believe in my affirmations, all i have to do is persist in my repeated positive thoughts (this is a major note to self!!). so, i’ll do this by affirming when i think of my desires and going through my affirmation list first thing when i wake up & last thing before bed!!

my affirmations

- my skin is crystal clear

- i have sleep paralysis every night

- it literally takes me 2 minutes to get sleep paralysis

- i always successfully get sleep paralysis

- everything always works out perfectly for me

- my 3d perfectly reflects my 4d

- my results are instant, my desires are fulfilled, and my 3D is fully conformed

- i have everything i could ever want

- my life is perfect

—

start date: 28 july 2022

end date: 30 july 2022

[carletes]

Okayy, let’s do this then: 11,21,33,38

Oops I forgot I asked for these! This anon also said 39 in a separate ask.

11. what are your fanfiction pet peeves?

Oh god, I'm going to sound like such a dick. I've said before I have really high standards for fanfiction, personally. I hate being pulled out of my suspension of disbelief. I want to be utterly immersed, so little things will break me out of that: stunted or OOC dialogue, inappropriate punctuation, common mistakes (e.g. "should of" instead of "should have"). Other little things: referring to people as adjectives or by their nationality too much (the Spaniard, the taller man - sometimes you have to do it to avoid clunkiness, but over-reliance on adjectives as pronouns/nouns gives me the ick), LOVE TRIANGLES 🤮, infidelity as a plot point, dub/noncon...i'm...going to stop now.

21. what’s the most memorable comment you’ve received?

oh my god. every comment i've ever received on ¡Revolución! where people talk about how it made them emotional about their own country, how it made them think about their parents/grandparents' experiences under a dictatorship, how it motivated them to become politically active, do things they've been putting on, how it's made them more hopeful. some comments that have said things about me that have made me want to cry and that help keep my head above water a little longer. literally, those mean the world to me.

33. would you let your family read your fics?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA no i would be disowned. my husband knows tho so that's fine.

38. what do you do when you feel discouraged about your fics (lack of comments, feeling demotivated to write, etc)

i. talk to @chilinorris algkjaklgja. NO REALLY like it's kind of lonely writing sometimes, and having someone who's not just a beta, but who actively creates with me, who encourages me when i get in my head, who will ALWAYS give me honest feedback :( i hope that everyone has a martina in their life.

i also try to go back to paragraphs or chapters in other writing that i love for inspiration and motivation. i want to write beautiful things and hopeful things that remind us why it's worthwhile being human, even when it's hard, especially when it's hard.

39. what’s your favorite fic from your favorite fandom?

ahhh i mean unseated from its throne: fall and fixture by heroics. also warm blood. SO goodlagjklajgla. in lore olympus, i think A Certain Kind of Eden by AnArdentChangeling even tho it hasn't been updated in months, and The Double Rose by mari_who.

[mira--mira]

Question from an aspiring writer:

How do you stay motivated on one project for such a long time?

I personally have the attention span of a goldfish, and whenever I have an idea I either have to write down everything my brain can spew immediately or have it be lost in the void for eternity.

Never mind going back and turning my outline into a fic or gasp editing.

Do you have any tips and/or tricks you use?

Ok, I got completely carried away with this just fyi, but hopefully I ended up answering your actual question 😂 tl;dr at the bottom.

To be honest, staying motivated is a tricky thing, one that I feel I'm still learning how to do even now and varies a bit between shortfics/oneshots and multi-chaptered fics/longfics. For a bit of background, I've been writing fanfic for about a year and a half, but I've been writing original fiction since I was seven, over a decade and a half, and I still wrestle with it. It's definitely a learning process.

One thing I wish someone would have told me when I was starting out was the power of ~scenes~ in either multi-chapters or one-shots. All writing is ultimately made up of scenes, but if you're struggling to put things together, focusing on an individual scene, or multiple short scenes, might help you focus on getting something completed, and it's something that eventually can be applied to longer works as well. Writing has been a snowball process for me and once I started getting anything completed, I felt more secure in knowing what I could write comfortably and what was out of my comfort zone, eventually getting to the point where I felt comfortable tackling bigger and longer projects and knowing I could stay with them.

OoT's interlude chapters and the snippet series are both good examples of scenes because I wrote them with that intention...even if most of them are actually two or three scenes combined. "Gai meets Hashirama and Madara", "Hashirama gets revenge on Kakashi", "Tatsuki and Hashirama pick flowers for Madara, then give them to him" etc. were all my starting points.

If you're first starting out and feel comfortable with outlines of some sort before you start writing I would encourage you to try and write down a bullet point list of your scene(s) and what you know you want to happen in it.

"Gai meets Hashirama and Madara"

* Hashirama meets Gai first, mistakes him for Lee.

* Madara is shopping for a gift for Hashirama

* Madara finds Gai and Hashirama, they spar, Gai kicks his ass, both of them love him.

This is how my initial outline looked for the first interlude chapter, technically each one of these "points" are their own scenes stuck together. Outlining is different for everyone, some people like super specific points, others even less detail than this. For me this is a nice middle that gives me a roadmap for the chapter, but allows plenty of room to naturally diverge and add detail. Play around with outlines and see what you're comfortable with/what gives you the best results.

I'm not sure of your individual situation, but if you're struggling to put together fics in general something like this might help. Doing this process again and again personally helps me stay on track and gives me a sense of progress.

This sense of progress is ultimately key and why I think motivation differs slightly between one-shots/short fics and longfics. If you confine the individual scene to a one-shot, that might give you the motivation to complete it. Even if you start writing and you get interrupted/can't finish having in one setting, bullet points sometimes help inspire me to finish because I'm not starting from scratch when I return to writing. The whole "eat an elephant one piece at a time" thing was difficult for me to learn, but ultimately proved true. Learning to chip away at something bit by bit is going to be the only (healthy) way to write longer projects you can't complete in one sitting.

For longer projects, it's a similar beast just on bigger levels and with an added dimension. I would actually suggest something similar to OoT for a starting project because it is ultimately broken up into arcs that you know and can reference, instead of making a lot of og content for a fan setting. Maybe not go into it thinking, 'I'll do a complete rewrite' but once you feel like you're ready for a longer project 30K+ or so, the rough outline method and the ability to follow arcs was what got me started when I eventually decided to make the fic multi-chaptered. Try writing one arc and keep yourself contained in that. Now the added dimension aspect in general for longfics is that you eventually want to plot individual chapters in a multi-chaptered longfic and individual arcs (character, plot, etc). This comes with practice. I honestly don't think there's a way to get around that. It's something that I'm still trying to work on and I can look back at my early work and see how I've improved, how I can recognize where things didn't go well in certain places, and how I would change them if I was writing today. That's a good thing to be able to do, it means you've grown! The other thing I find that helps with staying motivated week after week for longer projects is to roughly know where you're going and to try to be excited about a plot point/scene/chapter/etc that you're going to write. Really try to hype yourself up. For me, it's a moment that comes at the very end of the chunin arc and I start grinning even thinking about it because I know it's going to be awesome. It's always what gets me through the rough days, imagining the moment I'll get to actually write that scene in its entirety (it's definitely already outlined and I mentally play it out at least twice a week lol) and is a big motivating drive.

So far I think this is pretty standard stuff if you're an outliner and you've been writing for a few years, but the other thing motivational-wise for me is having a schedule. From reading this message alone, I would not suggest it for you right away. Get comfortable finishing small things and feeling confident that if you let an idea sit for a week or two, you can pick it back up and continue. But if you eventually dip your toes into longfics (and don't plan to pre-write everything before you publish) that routine and rhythm really helps keep me going. I've made a commitment, I've posted it online, I'm going to stick to it. No one is going to jump down my throat if I fail to keep it (this is still a hobby and having fun is the most important thing) but in my mind I should commit to it unless something irl prevents me from doing so. Don't put a tight deadline on yourself, I'd start with once a month or if you write shorter chapters every three weeks. This also would help you build up and get a readership, interaction being another big motivational key.

Also, it's important to accept that sometimes you bite off more than you can chew, and when you feel completely demotivated from a fanfic project...it's okay to drop it. It's okay to take a step back and work on something else. Maybe you'll come back to it, maybe you won't. If you can, try to pinpoint what it was about that project that made you demotivated, were you pushing yourself too much and you got burnt out, was it an ongoing series and your interest for canon lagged and so did the fic, was it just too stressful to keep juggling plotpoints, etc. and keep that in mind moving forward. Every experience can be a learning one and eventually make you a better writer that can eventually tackle those bigger projects. Don't be afraid to take on big aspirational projects, but don't walk into them blind either. Above all, and this is repeated a lot because it's true, enjoy what you write. Some days you might not. That's true with anything, but any project you take on the good should outweigh the bad.

This is my wrap up of the motivational section but I also wanted to throw my two-cents in about editing because "oh no editing" is a perspective I've seen from a lot of writers, and used to have myself, but I think is going to stifle your progress in the long run.

Here's the thing: you need to look forward to editing.

You don't have to be jumping for joy, but editing, imo, should be a positive thing. You have all these great ideas, you made it into a fic, something you wrote, and now you get to go back and make it even better! This is a tough attitude to adopt. I'm not going to pretend otherwise. It took me a long time to unlearn the negative attitude and even then sometimes I still wish the editing was already done once I type in the last period. But I've learned to at least appreciate what editing does and I try to think to myself as I'm going through and making changes things like "wow, this suddenly became so much better. X plot point that I thought of ten pages from now is suddenly being hinted at and doesn't come out of left field. The transition points are a lot cleaner, it's not so jarring anymore. I bet the readers are going to love this little detail. Here's some foreshadowing that I hope someone picks up bc it's going to come back in like 5 chapters from now" it's hard, especially when you start, but this is something you made, and now are actively making better and that's something to celebrate.

I hope this helps anon! I know it's a lot and I'm by no means an expert but I've been doing this for more than a decade because I love it and I want to help others get into writing to! I have no problem answering any writing questions you may have if you find this helpful!

tl;dr

-motivation is slightly different between short/long fics.

-starting out, learn to outline by scenes and focus on finishing small projects and getting to a point where you feel like you can put something down and come back and pick it up again in a week. Completion is key and will help you feel satisfied/know your limits.

-long projects also can work on the scene-to-scene outline but now with individual chapters and individual arcs. It's tough to balance both but comes with practice. Bit-by-bit is key, as is having 'one moment you can't wait to write', possibly a schedule if it works for you, and reader feedback are all huge long-term motivational points.

-editing is tough but learn to look forward to it instead of dreading it.

edited: added a bit more/few typos fixed

[brynwrites]

I was just wondering if you had any advice for a new writer? More on how to approach writing a book or anything you wish someone had told you, thanks!

THE BASICS OF NOVEL WRITING

First off, you have to know these two things:

Your first draft of your first book will be terrible.

All your favorite authors of all time wrote a terrible first draft of their first book too. Probably a terrible second and third draft, maybe even a terrible second and third book.

This is okay. It can make writing hard sometimes, but the point of writing is not to whip out a masterpiece the first time you type: it’s to have fun exploring new settings, watching new characters grow, and being the first person to ever experience this story–your story–progress!

So, where do we begin?

Know thine story.(or ya know… to don’t.)

Before you tackle any kind of project that will take months, even years, of work you want to first decide what you’re actually doing. In the case of writing, we outline. (Or sometimes, we deliberately choose not to online, but only after we thought about outlining and maybe tried it out a little.)

There’s no wrong way to outline. Every writer does it differently, and therefore there’s about a million different methods. You can instantly find a ton of them using google, and these are a bunch of my own personal outlining tips.

The things you should know by the end of your outline include:

Setting. Where does your story take place? What does this place feel like? (If it were being filmed as a movie, what would the color palate look like?)

Worldbuilding. If you’re using a real place, how much research have you done? If you’re creating the setting from scratch, in which ways is it like our real world and in which ways is it not? (You don’t need to know everything about your world building going into a project, but it’s good to keep track of what you haven’t figured out yet, so you don’t get to the end of the rough draft and realize that everything you made up along the way contradicts itself.)

Main Characters. Who are they and what do they want? What beliefs or flaws are keeping them from getting what they want, or driving them to want something which hurts them? What’s the first trait someone notices about them? (Check out this nifty character creation sheet for some simple development questions!)

Plot. Now, plot sounds scary to a lot of writers, but a plot is just the accumulation of your other story aspects put at odds with each other. Your characters will make choices trying to get what they want, and those choices will effect the rest of the world, which in turn comes to bite the characters in the butt and force them to make more choices until eventually they get what they want, for better or worse. That’s the basis of a plot: it’s everything standing between your character and the rest of their life. (If you don’t have any semblance of a plot, check out these nifty tricks.)

Genre. Specifically, why are you telling this story in the genre you chose? How do the themes and tropes of the genre work with your story? What would the story look like in another genre?

Optional: The Beginning. If you come to the blank page of death without knowing exactly where you’re starting it can be incredibly daunting. Check out my tips on writing the first act for more help.

However you chose to outline, (and whether you chose to outline at all), the most important thing to know going into a story is what will produce the central conflicts?

Conflict drives a story. 

Conflict between characters and other characters.

Conflict between characters and the obstacles to their desires.

Conflict between characters and their own flaws and beliefs.

Even if you have no idea where your story will go or how it will end, as long as you start out your story with a conflict that’s difficult to resolve, you’ll always be on the right track!

Now, to the writing.

For the first draft of your first book, I’m going to suggest this controversial tip: Ignore all the writing advice.

The learning stage of your writing journey (aka the first three books you write) will be a mess of picking up and throwing out advice, and you’ll have plenty of time to do that once you start revising your rough draft, but for now the most important thing is finishing your first novel. 

Write your story exactly how you want to and damn the advice.

Some important things to do though:

Decide how many words or pages you want to write a week and try to continuously hit that. (But start out small! Your writing heroes might be churning out a novel in a month, but a thousand words a week can be an good and ambitious goal during your first novel!) The key is to build a habit. 

Find someone to motivate you! This can be another writer friend but it can also be a non-writer friend you’re comfortable talking about your writing with. Tell this person what you’re doing and how much work you want to put in each week and let them be your cheerleader.

Don’t get feedback yet. If you do have a writer friend cheering you on, it might be temping to send them your work asking for their opinion, but negative feedback tends to demotivate and make you question yourself. If you’re letting people read your first rough drafts, ask them just to be motivational right now, and then save their critique for when you’re ready to edit!  

Don’t even get feedback from yourself. It’s very tempting to stop every three paragraphs and wonder if you could have written them better a different way. And the truth is, you probably could, BUT imagine how much better future writer you (who has finished the whole manuscript and has far more skill than current you) will fix those paragraphs up?! Current you has barely any more skill than the you who wrote those paragraphs last week, so let your future far more skilled self handle it.

Don’t be afraid to change your story and process as you go. If you go into your story believing something specific about it, but you come up with something you like better as you write, you’re allowed to change it. You’re allowed to write it out of order. You’re also allowed to write another story beside (or instead of) the one you set out to write.

Above all: KEEP WRITING. Writing can be tough (even for the best and most skilled of writers) when you stop writing and start thinking, because thinking often leads to doubting and fearing. Just put one word after the next and let your future self worry about whether those words sound good together.

You can find more of my advice about the rough drafting stage here!

So, you have a novel... now what?

Now comes the revision stage. (And yes, you will have to revise. Some writers have to do more revisions than others, but nearly every author worth their salt will have at done at least three drafts of a story before sending it out into the world.)

Just like outlining, there are many ways of revising and each writer has to do what works best for them. Some people rewrite the entire book from scratch. Some take elaborate notes and then rework pieces at a time. Some just dive in and change whatever they don’t like as they read. Here’s an in-depth look at what I do when I edit my rough drafts.

For your first novel, I’d suggest one of two ways:

Rewrite it all. This is a good method if you either changed your story a lot while your wrote or you didn’t have a thorough outline so your resulting story ended up having huge holes. Rewriting is never a waste. Your pacing, dialog, even your prose, will all come out better when you rewrite the same story over.

Re-outline it all. This is a good method if you don’t think you need to rewrite but you don’t know where to begin editing. Read through the story and track everything that happens and then compare it to standard character arcs, three act structures, and so forth. The goal is to figure out how your story compares to the ideal simplistic stories in your genre and then tweak your story to make it closer to the ideal.*

*In no way do you have to stick with traditional or simplistic structures for all your writing, but if you don’t know how and why the traditions work, it’s very hard to produce a great story that defies them.

Once you’ve done some editing yourself, you want to find another writer (or three, or five) who’s of a similar skill set as you and get their feedback. They’ll be able to pick out issues you didn’t notice.

The final thing you’ll have to deal with in the editing process is your prose. Most writers have terrible prose for the first 50k to 100k words they write. Beginning writers who’ve already written short stories or role played or wrote a lot as youngsters tend to have an advantage in this. The thing to always keep in mind is that it’s okay if your first book’s prose is awful. 

You’ll have improved your prose just by writing it, and you’ll have a better grasp on story as well. This book doesn’t define who you are as a writer. If you really love the story, you can chose to rework it further to clean it up, or you can use what you learned through it to write another book that’s cleaner from the get-go. 

THINGS I WISH I’D KNOWN STARTING OUT

1. First books almost never get published. 

A lot of us resist this, because our first books are good, dammit, we worked very hard to make them that way! But the quality of the book isn’t always the thing that holds it back; often the first book we write ends up pretty similar to the more poorly written published fiction, but it wasn’t written with knowledge of the publishing industry and the market. 

And that’s okay! It’s okay to write a lovely book that you put aside so you can publish your second or third or fourth book instead. That first story is still wonderful and it still helped you immensely.

2. Not everyone will like even the best story you ever write. (And even if it’s a literary masterpiece some of them will quote literary flaws as the reason they don’t like it!)

It’s common knowledge that everyone has different tastes in literature and one person might dislike a story another person loves. What’s talked about less often, is that the people who dislike a story based on taste, will often pinpoint specific literary aspects they believe were done poorly. They’ll say the characters are bad, and the plot had too many holes, or the prose was clunky. And they’ll probably believe what they say, and find evidence to back it up.

And that’s okay! As long as the majority of your target audience isn’t finding these things a problem, then you’re in the clear as a writer. Not every reader’s critique is valid and not every piece of feedback is worth listening to, even if it has the lingo of a legit critique.

3. You have to be reading in order to write well. Or, more specifically: If you aren’t reading books, you won’t write as well as you can.

It’s easy to assume that just because we read a lot of books growing up and know how stories work that we can write good ones. And in some ways, that can be true. We can write good stories without reading good stories—but we can’t write great ones.

A writer who really wants to improve their craft should try to read a book a month, or more if possible. If you have limited time, you can read shorter books, listen to audiobooks, or quit any book that doesn’t immediately hold your interest. But do read. Read, read, read, read.

4. If you can’t write a blurb, the problem is in your story.

Maybe this is a little harsh; there’s a lot of skill required to writing blurbs and it does take practice! But whether you have a concise story with characters whose goals and resulting conflicts weave seamlessly into the setting and create an easily describable plot with specific, emotional stakes and hard character choices will be very clear when it comes time to write those down as a 200 word blurb.

It’s so essential to blurb writing to have a tense, well paced, nicely woven story, that writing the blurb while you work on the story’s rough draft can actually help you produce a better story!

5. Sometimes the best stories are not the epic masterpieces but the ones you’d want to whiz through despite its many flaws.

And these stories are worth writing. Don’t feel the least bit bad for choosing to write the book you’d want to read as a ‘guilty pleasure.’

And on that note, if you’re still reading this, go check out my guilty pleasure book Our Bloody Pearl to support my ability to answer asks (and also get a swell read about a sassy, disabled siren and a soft, freckly pirate.)

[worldbuildguild]

So I'm new here. I want to get back into drawing, but I don't want my reason to be "because I feel jealous to the point of anger at better artists". As such, I was wondering how I could motivate myself, because I can usually keep myself going for a few months before spontaneously losing interest (though it doesn't help matters that I very rarely show my work off). I'm also not sure if having a few "favorite" subjects or trying to draw everything under the sun would be a better idea.

It sounds like you’re experiencing a perfectly natural cycle of motivation and demotivation. Here are some things to consider in regards to that. 

Finding something you like

In regards to whether or not you should find a subject matter and ‘stick’ with it: I feel that as long as you are just striving to draw consistently and not building up an audience, there’s no point in forcing yourself to draw one specific type of content. If you have a favorite thing to draw- then you’ll probably gravitate more towards that naturally, so I wouldn’t go out of my way to put your mind on a one-track kind of direction.

If you want to build a fanbase up, then yes, showing consistency in your content ( reoccurring characters, a specific style, or medium ) can definitely help you entice people to stick with you for a longer period. But since you mention that you’re not exactly showing anyone your stuff, I don’t see that as being your goal as is.  

https://www.thoughtco.com/writing-instrument-history-4083355

Building up insistency

The reason I don’t want to lock you in a box is that it sounds like you haven’t built up what I’d like to call Artistic insistency ( although I’ve heard someone call it redundancy, both words work IMO ). Insistency is the regular, consistent return to your craft. Insistency is what makes professionals and highly active artists able to keep on producing art even if they aren’t feeling overly motivated. 

Insistency is not something you have or get by default. As a new artist, your first goal is to build Insistency, which - if you’re very young, could be cultivated by your parents supplying you with paper, pencils and the time and freedom to explore the craft in order to build your passion to it. As an adult, cultivating it can be indulging in experimentation or invest in supplies that feed your curiosity. 

Basically: it’s about finding that one thing about your craft that keeps you coming back, and then keep on doing that till eventually the fulfillment you get from indulging in it has you motivated to engage with the craft on par with your other hobbies. 

It sounds as if you already have a certain amount of insistency build up. But that it could still use more cultivation to really spark your passion for the art. It’s completely all right not to have that insistency too by the way! There is nothing wrong with leaving art for a bit and then coming back. But of course, if you want to turn stuff out on the regular, this might be something worth looking into.   

https://www.cbc.ca/news/health/drawing-memory-aid-1.4963432

The cycle of productivity

Something I’ve found that people talk about shockingly little is the natural pauses and the cyclic nature of motivation. Especially since in a field such as the creative one, we only have our motivation to rely on when it comes to churning out quality content. If we’re not feeling motivated, our minds can be scattered and inattentive when we draw, which results in a frustrating process and perhaps a product beneath our usual standard. 

I didn’t learn about this until I spend some years in art-school. And it wasn’t anything anyone told me, but something I had to experience myself. I’ve later talked to more artists about it, and it seems that everyone has some kind of cycle to their motivation and growth. Typically consisting of periods of high motivation, medium motivation and no motivation at all.

For me, a cycle consists of about  1-2 months of medium motivation. I get stuff done, but it’s mostly commissions, comic pages, reference material, etc. I don’t typically go out of my way to produce anything that challenges me or explores new territory. After this, I’ll feel a short period of high motivation. Usually a week or two. Here I’ll be churning out art that consistently challenges me, forages into new experiments and generally resides above my typical standard. After a rush like that, my motivation tends to crash for two-three weeks again. Sometimes I’m able to crank something out, but its usually only the least required. 

Your cycle is individual to you, so pay attention to how it fluctuates. And respect your downtime! If you’re experiencing fatigue or low motivation, don’t push yourself to draw. In fact, I highly encourage that you do something completely different. Start sculpting, knit, or just play video games and read comic books. Take the time to recharge your batteries, or you might actually burn out for good. 

https://www.ps4.dk/2018/11/hvornaar-har-du-sidst-foelt-dig-virkelig-motiveret/

Community involvement

Undoubtedly, getting involved with a community that shares the same interests as you can help you stay motivated. Whether that be digital or not, both are useful. Though I must admit, to me at least - nothing really beats physically sitting in a room with other people, talking about art face to face. The internet is great and I love chatting with other artists online as well - but there’s something unique about cramming a dozen artists into a studio. So, if you want to involve yourself more ( whether by showing your own art or not ) I definitely recommend finding these little niché communities if you have the spoons for it. 

https://spectrumnews1.com/ca/la-west/news/2019/12/02/artist-and-art-historian-working-to-make-art-accessible

- mod wackart ( ko-fi ) 

[kaiamcrgan]

⌠ COURTNEY EATON, 22, CISFEMALE, SHE/HER ⌡ welcome back to gallagher academy, KAIA MORGAN! according to their records, they’re a THIRD year, specializing in ADVANCED ENCRYPTION + RESEARCH & DEVELOPMENT; and they DID NOT go to a spy prep high school. when i see them walking around in the halls, i usually see a flash of ( messy black hair, chipped polish nails, can of energy drink, baggy knitted sweatshirt, saccharine hum of weezer's island in the sun ). when it’s the virgo’s birthday on 9/18/1997, they always request their CREAMY SPINACH PIZZA from the school’s chefs. looks like they’re well on their way to graduation.

I have no shame and just copy paste lol did i edit? absolutely not ehehe but love me. [ @gallagherintro​ ]

trigger warning: abduction mention

HISTORY

KAIA MORGAN was a descendant of one of the biggest landowners and stewards in Oahu, Hawaii. Her family’s goal was to procure land to build eco-friendly business establishments that would provide livelihood to the community and at the same time, shoo away land developers that could possibly abuse and eradicate the island’s natural resources. Eventually, they also tapped into government services because well, people loved the Morgans.

Despite the good nature of the family’s legacy, it could get a little messy behind the scenes. Business tycoons came and gave them offers to flat out some hills and cut down trees to build hotels and factories that could possibly poison the sea. Some of these people had been aggressive, threats had been made and even went beyond crazy just to get what they want. When throwing rocks with notes at their home was not enough, they thought that abducting eight year old Kaia would shake them off from where they stood.

Through special services, Kaia was swiftly recovered from her abductors, people involved where stripped off of their business permits and served their jail time but it left Kaia permanent emotional and mental scars. There was no getting over that. At least, not for a very long time.

The incident left her being overly cautious of her surroundings, she avoided talking to people, too scared to put her trust in someone. She had been constantly felt being watched, if not by her family’s enemies, it would be by bodyguards her father hired to casually look after her. They almost didn’t bother her but having them around made her feel uncomfortable but she really couldn’t complain because she knew it was for her protection.

It was when she turned to something that didn’t really require social interaction, the internet. For the time being, it made her happy, forget her childhood trauma and help her gain friends through playing online games and joining forums that stimulates her opinions on current pressing issues. It became her comfort zone. She get to open up to people who she didn’t personally meet only know her by her username.

Came high school graduation and Kaia did not exactly know what to do. She was done with the hellish years of her life and she was not ready to jump into another hellfire. While she was learning the ropes of the good and the dark side of the world by web, she was sort of disconnected in real life. Her mother would get in fights with her, whining at how she was wasting her life away as she all she ever wanted was to play video games and keep her virtual connection strong.

Her fight with her mother had gotten worse when they found an acceptance letter to this Ivy League she didn’t really apply for. Turns out, her bodyguards were Gallagher bred and they did more than just looked after her.

It wasn’t like it didn’t pick her interest. In fact, she did her own research. Though it was something she might have been interested in, she didn’t think she was cut for that.

AT GALLAGHER….

At first glance, it was obvious that Kaia wasn’t really the ideal embodiment of a Gallagher girl if one would simply judge her by her demeanor. It didn’t mean she didn’t earn her place.

Surely, she had struggled fitting in but it wasn’t new to her. Surprisingly, she had like it. It was a far cry from any educational constitution she had been before. It also helped that it was a little exclusive so she didn’t really feel a lot of pressure when it came to social interactions

She had a lot of firsts in Gallagher and whether she admits it or not, she was glad her family encouraged her to go to Roseville. She was not sure if her parents were fully aware of where they sent her off too but really, it wasn’t that bad.

PERSONALITY

Kaia is very timid, doesn’t speak much and from time to time, she stutters but she is trying her best alright. Getting two sentences was a little bit too much for her already until she is already comfortable with you because she will ramble a lot.

Kaia keeps people at arms length although it doesn’t really last long because she likes attention ( although she didn’t like being in the spotlight ). Opening up is not something she would do and she would rather not have an conversation that revolves around her.

Kaia is unfortunately a pushover. She will probably do things for you as long as you leave her alone afterwards.

Kaia is either hyper-focused or slipping her attention into something else mid-conversation. She is focused too much when she does something like swimming or drawing that she gets a little lost in it and during normal conversation, she will probably stop you from talking because she saw a cat passed by.

Her humor is so bad (or the way she delivers it ). Almost every joke she crack, she almost regret saying it. Most of the time she laughs at her own jokes and puns.

She is very moody and one person probably can’t tell because she is meek.

Kaia can be easily motivated just as she is easily demotivated. Despite being smart, she has very low opinion about herself. She had a tendency to give up easily when things didn’t go as plan.

MORE FACTS

She is 5′10 and hates it. She slouches a lot because she doesn’t like to draw attention.

She has a fat Russian blue cat at home named Meowth and has a picture of him on her bedside table.

Kaia doesn’t really express herself much so she pours it all in her journal with unfinished songs and drawings. She has more patience in texting than engaging in a conversation, with the exception of people she was very comfortable with.

Honestly, Kaia is a little spoiled. She struggles with keeping her room tidy because she was used of someone cleaning after her.

WANTED CONNECTIONS

BEST FRIEND ( 0/1) - Kaia only met them during her first year since she didn’t really have friends in high school. If not, then they were someone she met online and when they met

MOM/DAD FRIEND ( 0/?) - Kaia doesn’t really take care of herself so someone has to! She needs a lot of those.

CLOSE FRIEND ( 0/? ) - it could be like study buddy, video game buddy, lab partner, just someone that Kaia tolerates and tolerates Kaia. One of the people she the people she didn’t mind hanging out with, the kind of person PJ can nerd out with.

FRENEMIES ( 0/2 ) - probably someone that annoys Kaia( and probably blackmail her ) into doing their bidding. It could also be a video game buddy that she gained a unhealthy competition with.

EX-FRIEND ( 0/2 ) - the falling of the friendship can be mostly blame of Kaia’s part, like she was probably unavailable when she needed them or they did something that turned Kaia away from them. Or something happened between them that put them in an awkward situation.

EX-SOMEONE ( 0/? ) - the kind of relationship I wanna explore was her first one in which a disaster because Kaia didn’t know what to do so she probably end up avoiding this person. Another is the one that ended ugly, like this person cheated on Kaia. Or something that Kaia thought was serious but just a casual one. Another is one that just simply didn’t work, one of those friends to lovers thing that didn’t work as lovers.

BAD INFLUENCE ( 0/2 ) - Kaia couldn’t avoid being social forever. Basically just an enabler of her curiosity about these sort of things.

MUTUAL FEELINGS ( 0/1 ) - someone she hangs out with, they are not quite a friend but they are special to her. Sometimes they kiss. They cared about each other but there’s no label in it, not after the string of disastrous relationship she had been.

FAMILY ( 0/? ) - self-explanatory really but you know, cousins but not limited to family friend or a relative of her stepfather she had met several times.

ANYTHING UNDER SUN REALLY - we can also always brainstorm if none of the mentioned above really fits

IF you reach this part, you are amazing!!!!!! Like I wouldn’t bother myself most days to be honest. Just reply if you want me to hit your DMs to plot or like hit my dicord at batnips#8030

[kaiamore]

⌠ COURTNEY EATON, 22, CISFEMALE, SHE/HER ⌡ welcome back to gallagher academy, KAIA MORGAN! according to their records, they’re a SECOND year, specializing in ADVANCED ENCRYPTION + RESEARCH & DEVELOPMENT; and they DID NOT go to a spy prep high school. when i see them walking around in the halls, i usually see a flash of ( messy black hair, chipped polish nails, can of energy drink, baggy knitted sweatshirt ). when it’s the virgo’s birthday on 9/18/1997, they always request their CREAMY SPINACH PIZZA from the school’s chefs. looks like they’re well on their way to graduation. 

This is a long ass thing to read tbh I’m sorry. You can just hit me up to save yourself from trouble. I got lazy to really but hi I’m Madie, Slytherin, Aries bitch, INFJ, and I cry a lot. It’s like 4 in the morning hiiii. You can check also check her PINTEREST, WANTED CONNECTION PAGE and BIO. Under the cut is my baby. 

trigger warning: abduction

HISTORY

KAIA MORGAN was a descendant of one of the biggest landowners and stewards in Oahu, Hawaii. Her family’s goal was to procure land to build eco-friendly business establishments that would provide livelihood to the community and at the same time, shoo away land developers that could possibly abuse and eradicate the island’s natural resources. Eventually, they also tapped into government services because well, people loved the Morgans.

Despite the good nature of the family’s legacy, it could get a little messy behind the scenes. Business tycoons came and gave them offers to flat out some hills and cut down trees to build hotels and factories that could possibly poison the sea. Some of these people had been aggressive, threats had been made and even went beyond crazy just to get what they want. When throwing rocks with notes at their home was not enough, they thought that abducting eight year old Kaia would shake them off from where they stood.

Through special services, Kaia was swiftly recovered from her abductors, people involved where stripped off of their business permits and served their jail time but it left Kaia permanent emotional and mental scars. There was no getting over that. At least, not for a very long time.

The incident left her being overly cautious of her surroundings, she avoided talking to people, too scared to put her trust in someone. She had been constantly felt being watched, if not by her family’s enemies, it would be by bodyguards her father hired to casually look after her. They almost didn’t bother her but having them around made her feel uncomfortable but she really couldn’t complain because she knew it was for her protection. 

It was when she turned to something that didn’t really require social interaction, the internet. For the time being, it made her happy, forget her childhood trauma and help her gain friends through playing online games and joining forums that stimulates her opinions on current pressing issues. It became her comfort zone. She get to open up to people who she didn’t personally meet only know her by her username.

Came high school graduation and Kaia did not exactly know what to do. She was done with the hellish years of her life and she was not ready to jump into another hellfire. While she was learning the ropes of the good and the dark side of the world by web, she was sort of disconnected in real life. Her mother would get in fights with her, whining at how she was wasting her life away as she all she ever wanted was to play video games and keep her virtual connection strong.

Her fight with her mother had gotten worse when they found an acceptance letter to this Ivy League she didn’t really apply for. Turns out, her bodyguards were Gallagher bred and they did more than just looked after her. 

It wasn’t like it didn’t pick her interest. In fact, she did her own research. Though it was something she might have been interested in, she didn’t think she was cut for that. 

AT GALLAGHER….

At first glance, it was obvious that Kaia wasn’t really the ideal embodiment of a Gallagher girl if one would simply judge her by her demeanor. It didn’t mean she didn’t earn her place.

Surely, she had struggled fitting in but it wasn’t new to her. Surprisingly, she had like it. It was a far cry from any educational constitution she had been before. It also helped that it was a little exclusive so she didn’t really feel a lot of pressure when it came to social interactions

She had a lot of firsts in Gallagher and whether she admits it or not, she was glad her family encouraged her to go to Roseville. She was not sure if her parents were fully aware of where they sent her off too but really, it wasn’t that bad.

PERSONALITY

Kaia is very timid, doesn’t speak much and from time to time, she stutters but she is trying her best alright. Getting two sentences was a little bit too much for her already until she is already comfortable with you because she will ramble a lot.

Kaia keeps people at arms length although it doesn’t really last long because she likes attention ( although she didn’t like being in the spotlight ). Opening up is not something she would do and she would rather not have an conversation that revolves around her.

Kaia is unfortunately a pushover. She will probably do things for you as long as you leave her alone afterwards.

Kaia is either hyper-focused or slipping her attention into something else mid-conversation. She is focused too much when she does something like swimming or drawing that she gets a little lost in it and during normal conversation, she will probably stop you from talking because she saw a cat passed by.

Her humor is so bad (or the way she delivers it ). Almost every joke she crack, she almost regret saying it. Most of the time she laughs at her own jokes and puns.

She is very moody and one person probably can’t tell because she is meek.

Kaia can be easily motivated just as she is easily demotivated. Despite being smart, she has very low opinion about herself. She had a tendency to give up easily when things didn’t go as plan.

MORE FACTS

She is 5′10 and hates it. She slouches a lot because she doesn’t like to draw attention.

She has a fat Russian blue cat at home named Meowth and has a picture of him on her bedside table.

Kaia doesn’t really express herself much so she pours it all in her journal with unfinished songs and drawings. She has more patience in texting than engaging in a conversation, with the exception of people she was very comfortable with.

Honestly, Kaia is a little spoiled. She struggles with keeping her room tidy because she was used of someone cleaning after her.

WANTED CONNECTIONS

BEST FRIEND ( 0/1) - Kaia only met them during her first year since she didn’t really have friends in high school. If not, then they were someone she met online and when they met

MOM/DAD FRIEND ( 0/?) - Kaia doesn’t really take care of herself so someone has to! She needs a lot of those.

CLOSE FRIEND ( 0/? ) - it could be like study buddy, video game buddy, lab partner, just someone that Kaia tolerates and tolerates Kaia. One of the people she the people she didn’t mind hanging out with, the kind of person PJ can nerd out with.

FRENEMIES ( 0/2 ) - probably someone that annoys Kaia( and probably blackmail her ) into doing their bidding. It could also be a video game buddy that she gained a unhealthy competition with.

EX-FRIEND ( 0/2 ) - the falling of the friendship can be mostly blame of Kaia’s part, like she was probably unavailable when she needed them or they did something that turned Kaia away from them. Or something happened between them that put them in an awkward situation.

EX-SOMEONE ( 0/? ) - the kind of relationship I wanna explore was her first one in which a disaster because Kaia didn’t know what to do so she probably end up avoiding this person. Another is the one that ended ugly, like this person cheated on Kaia. Or something that Kaia thought was serious but just a casual one. Another is one that just simply didn’t work, one of those friends to lovers thing that didn’t work as lovers.

BAD INFLUENCE ( 0/2 ) - Kaia couldn’t avoid being social forever. Basically just an enabler of her curiosity about these sort of things.

MUTUAL FEELINGS ( 0/1 ) - someone she hangs out with, they are not quite a friend but they are special to her. Sometimes they kiss. They cared about each other but there’s no label in it, not after the string of disastrous relationship she had been.

FAMILY ( 0/? ) - self-explanatory really but you know, cousins but not limited to family friend or a relative of her stepfather she had met several times.

ANYTHING UNDER SUN REALLY - we can also always brainstorm if none of the mentioned above really fits

IF you reach this part, you are amazing!!!!!! Like I wouldn’t bother myself most days to be honest. Just reply if you want me to hit your DMs to plot or like hit my dicord at batnips#8030

[crossbows-and-moonshine]

How to stay motivated.

Welcome my loves, to the first-ever FanFic Fridays post. 

I’m kicking this one off with something I’ve been asked a lot in my years writing. A lot of people seem to have the same question or problem so I figured it was a good way to start this new series.

I’ve been asked more than a few times how to stay motivated writing a fic, more so when you’re taking requests. Now I’m not talking writer's block here, although some tips do apply. If anyone wants my tips on writer's block, let me know and I’ll cover it another time. But this is purely about when you’re just not motivated with a fic or requests. Either multi chap or one-shots.

Who are you writing for?

The first step is simple. You need to have a real good think about who you’re writing for, because if you're writing for anyone other than yourself and your own enjoyment, let me tell you, its gonna get old real fucking fast.

You have to enjoy what you're writing. That's the only way it will inspire you to write. Don't get me wrong, we do write for the readers too, especially with one-shots that are requested like me. But what I learnt was, I can't sit there and force myself to write something just because somebody wants it. 

I’ll end up staring at a blank document for hours until I painfully churn something out that's a pile of shit. And nobody wants that. I have a billion requests in my ask box that have sat there for ages. It doesn't mean I won't write them, it just means I’ll write them when the inspiration grabs me. 

My best work happens when I’m really into something, when I can't help but keep typing and get it all down.

If your sole motivation for writing is to get likes and follows, you’ll burn yourself out within a blink of an eye. You have to want to write and love the topic you write about for it to work well, if you want to put out good content. Sometimes, likes and reviews are scarce, and if that's the only reason you write, to please others, then you’ll find yourself wanting to give up. Those of us who write for our own enjoyment will continue to write and post because that's not the only reason why we are doing it.

This doesn't mean we don't love when a reader lets us know they enjoyed our work. We fanfic writers love that shit. it lets us know what things are a hit, and who doesn't love it when you spend time making something and people let you know it was awesome? 

The difference is though, even though we enjoy and appreciate it, that isn't our sole motivation to write. We would still write regardless of that and continue to post our work.

If you do write for yourself, once you have completed it and decide to post it, the readers will most likely go nuts for it. It will be clear you poured your soul into the work, and its because you loved it so much. 

If you’re unsure whether you write for yourself or not, here's a little exercise that could help. Write a fic, the amount of chapters is up to you. But don’t post it until it is fully written and complete. With no feedback or likes to keep you going, you’ll have to keep going with it until it's done off your own back. Then you can post it and reap the rewards and you have written it completely for your own enjoyment. This is exactly what I did with Such a Softer Sin, and let me tell you, it was the best thing I ever did.

Doing this first step ensures that you’re more likely to be motivated to write. This will eliminate a lot of the feelings of demotivation that creep up on you.

Niche

Another simple thing is to have a good think about what kind of things within fics you enjoy writing. By this, I mean your little niche in the fandom. For example, I love writing AU’s or things set before the movies or show. When it comes to writing canon, I fucking loathe it. The times I do write canon, I try and do canon divergent to keep it somewhat more interesting for me. Whenever I try to write strictly canon, the motivation gets sucked out of me quicker than me slurping on a milkshake from McDonald’s. And let me tell you, I slurp real fucking fast.

Figure out what kind of things you like writing. Maybe you love canon, maybe you love AU’s or pre-show/movies. The beauty of writing your own fics is the fact you can do whatever the fuck you want with them. Don't force yourself to write something if you don't enjoy that style. 

Pantser or plotter?

Similar to above, figuring out which way you like to write can really help keep you motivated. You could be writing the way you find isn't for you and that's why you’re struggling. A plotter is self-explanatory. It's a writer that plots out the story. Some plotters are intense, planning out every detail and character before they write, others only minor plotting. A pantser is someone who free writes, this is me. Free writing for those who might not now, is writing with no plot. I literally open my document and type randomly, it feeds off itself. One chapter would roll into more inspiration for the next and so on. My muses are in my head and it's like I’m watching a movie in my mind. I just type it out for you all. I really feel like I’m not in control of my fics and half the time, I’m just as shocked as my readers are with what comes out. Or maybe I’m just crazy? 

The point of me telling you this is; When I started, I tried to plot. Oh, how I fucking tried. But it didn't work for me. I lost motivation quickly and I’m a pantser by nature. So more than half the time my chapters would end up in the opposite direction as I planned and then I got stuck, trying to figure out how to get it back on track and I’d just give up. I didn’t even know free writing was a thing. I thought you had to plot things out, that it was the only way to write well. And I was wrong.

Give both a go and see what feels right for you. I’m a pantser for life. I would get the briefest idea for a fic and start typing, the rest comes as I type. Its more fun for me that way. I feel like a reader too, getting the experience of not knowing what's going to happen next. 

There's nothing wrong with being a plotter though, it’s all about personal preference. One is not superior to another. Maybe you’re a super organised person, plotting keeps you on track. Maybe you even enjoy mapping it all out. Just take a moment to try both types and see what you enjoy the most. Then you’ll know what your writing style is and you can go from there. The more you enjoy it, the more motivated you will be and the better your fics will be. Win-win.

Now of course sometimes, you might love a fic. You’re really into it, but then bam, the spark’s gone and you have no idea what the fuck happened. Now you have a half-finished fic and if you’ve already started posting it, people waiting for an update.

Under Pressure

First off, don't ever feel pressured to post an update, even if people are bugging you about it. Like I mentioned before, if you force it out of yourself to please others, you're more than likely going to be unhappy with the result. Taking a break can be a good thing. Take a step back from the fic, maybe even work on another. Having a breather and coming back with fresh eyes can be super useful and there's no shame in needing a break from a fic. 

The exercise above is honestly a really good tool to use anyway. When I started writing multi chaps, I would write a chapter and post it right away. This can give you so much stress and pressure. Whenever I would hit a wall or the motivation went away, I had people asking about updates and I started to get stressed. Then I wouldn't be able to write at all. Now, I tend to either finish the fic, or at least be more than 5 chapters ahead of what I’m posting. This way, even if you do lag behind with writing, you have something to post and it will ease the pressure.

My preference is to finish the fic completely. Then I get to post every day without worry and I’m not playing catch up, trying to write quickly and rushing to get it posted. Now you’re all thinking, ‘But Sarah, aren’t you posting Let The Flames Begin as you go?’ Yes, I am. Why? Because I’m an idiot  :’)

I posted the first chapter. It came to me and I wanted to know if it was worth making into something. Usually, I’d just write it anyway and save it for a rainy day. But I have that many stories on the go, I didn't know if it was worth taking my time with. People liked it and as I started writing it, I fucking fell so in love with the story that now I can't stop writing it. 

I am in front though by around 10 chapters, so I’m not too worried about catching up. To me, that's plenty of chapters ahead to make sure if I do hit a wall, I won't feel pressured or worried about it. All my other fics I’m working on though won’t be posted until they’re complete.

Thinking ahead like this can really ease that pressure and in my opinion, that really helps you write better and stay motivated.

Fall in love again

Sometimes, it might be useful to try and remember what you liked about your fic in the first place. Maybe rewatch the movie or show, even read other peoples fics to get you back in the groove. Read your own fic from the very beginning and pick out the parts you liked best and why you liked them. Maybe the last chapter just ran away with itself and it went into a direction you really didn't expect or like. It happens to me all the time. Sit down and see if there's a way you can work around it and bring it back to the place you wanted it to be, or if all else fails, delete the chapter and rewrite it the way you wished you had in the first place.

Closing requests

Now this one is more specific to one-shot writers who take requests. Don't feel bad if you have to close your requests for a little while to catch up. Feeling overwhelmed can make you lose motivation real fucking quick. I don't know about you guys, but I can't write under pressure. It mounts up and my brain just melts and then I can't write a fucking thing. Close requests, catch up, take a minute to breathe. Sometimes, something as simple as taking the pressure off can be really freeing for your mind and get you back into it.

Write when it feels right

Also, don't feel like you have to write them in the order people sent you. People might not think this is fair but they need to see it from the writers POV. I have some requests that are over a year old, my brain just hasn't been inspired to write them. Yet someone could send me a request today that makes my brain get excited and I have to write it. Sometimes once I’ve got in the swing of it, I end up finishing multiple requests when I write this way. There is no need to try and get to them in order like that. If some don't inspire you, just wait until they do and write another. 

Plot bunnies 4eva

This one applies to both multi chap and one-shot writers and something you guys know I do all the fucking time. If you’re stuck and need a break from one thing, feel free to start another. Am I enabling you to make those plot bunnies grow? Why yes, I am. But there's a reason. 

When I get stuck on a fic, I’ll put it away for a bit and work on another idea I had. This gives me plenty to work on. So whenever I get stuck on something, I just jump to another that's inspiring me. Writing something new can really get you back into writing again and its better than not writing at all. It gets your creative juices flowing and you might find yourself going back to the fic you're stuck on with new ideas.

On the same note, sometimes you might get this super cool idea for the person you’re writing about. And you cram it in your current fic but it’s just not fucking working. Now your story is all weird and you don't like it and it’s making you not want to continue with it. Take that idea and make a new fic with it. Sometimes I get ideas for Daryl and I try them out in my fic, but it just doesn't gel with what’s already going on or the OC in the story. It doesn't make sense to try and stick an idea in there that doesn't fit and feels out of place. But that doesn't mean you have to throw it away. Just use it for another story and see where it leads.

Breaks don't equal quitting

There's nothing wrong with taking a break from writing altogether. If its all gotten too much or you have no motivation at all for anything. Maybe, like me, you have mental health issues and you just need a good breather. That's perfectly fine and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. 

Those who have followed me for a while might remember that I went on a hiatus for over a year at one point. My mental health reached an all-time low and I couldn't keep up with requests. I put so much pressure on myself and it made me worse, and in the end, I had to take a step back altogether.

At one point I thought that was it. I thought my love for writing fanfics was over and I was gutted. And then randomly one day, an idea popped into my head. The simplest of thoughts about an OC meeting the boys from Boondock Saints. My idea was just that I wanted a girl to come into McGinty's out of the rain, and that's where she meets the boys. That was it, the smallest of ideas. The rest came to me as I started writing and before I knew it, I couldn't stop. I wrote 39 chapters of that one, Such a Softer Sin, and then I even did a sequel. 

Don't feel like a break means quitting forever or that you’ll never be inspired to write again. After writing that fic, I haven't stopped writing again and I’m more in love with writing than I’ve ever been. Sometimes you just need to recharge your batteries again and there’s nothing wrong with that at all.

I hope some of these tips are helpful to you guys. You don't have to listen to me of course, all of this is just my opinion and personal experience. If you have any questions or a problem, feel free to talk to me any way you feel like and I’ll get to it on FanFic Fridays! :)

Much love,

Sarah

[chocodollxren]

Chocoooooo!! Loved the savanaclaw + octavinelle funmatsucha gyokuro! It's sad because it's true. School nowadays feels more like a chore rather than an actual thing you'd like to do, even if your focus of study is something of your interest. It feels like you're just passing stuff to survive every week that comes by. I wish it wasn't the case, though. I do hope you're not stressed out from school plus the requests! take care and I'm excited for your event (っ.❛ ᴗ ❛.)っ

-☁️

awww thank you, and im also real excited! i understand your feelings! back when i did in person classes (i’m fully online now) it definitely felt like that. you wake up early, you’re tired, sometimes don’t eat, then you go to a cold place where you have to repeat the same cycle. it’s a lot worse for those with anxiety and stress out they’re being judged even on a bus ride, too, which i did. afterwards the chore of studying and trying to understand everything within such a fast pace setting can just be so demotivating sometimes. you finish one thing, especially as a slow worker, then more is piled up. i definitely felt that with one of my courses and passed, but man it just felt so difficult to constantly have such high expectations. i definitely also liked some of my classes,, genuine interest, but i found it to be a place where i’d rather just listen to teachers who were nice above the ones i genuinely were interested in. i think that even genuine interest can be broken if the one that teaches you it doesn’t allow you to express that interest, instead yelling, high standards, etc.

thank you for worrying about me! im not stressed since my current plan allows me to split my semester up into a few weeks. every so many weeks i take two classes only, then the next i do the other two course. etc until one semester covers all six regular classes. i do this completely fine, it actually makes me wish more classes were like this! it’s low stress as the entire course is available to you in the span of the few weeks and you can catch up or ask for help any time via email for those too scared or teacher’s hours. you could also just work ahead and do what you want now, take the next day off, or week off if you do it all Monday. i hope you’re doing well!! keep your chin up and you’ll definitely make it through your classes<33

[alia15]

The Impact of the Past Year on Friendships

I texted a friend the other day — a good friend that I’ve known since college but barely get to talk to much these days. “I miss you!” I told her, followed by something I feel like I write a lot these days.

“Can we catch up soon?”

She wrote back, and so we went back and forth listing our schedules. She’s a mom of two who runs her own business and has more availability to chat during the week, and I work full time and am in a black hole of digital media mayhem Monday through Friday, and finally get my head above water on weekends.

Needless to say, it’s been a week since that text exchange and we still haven’t nailed down a day or time to talk.

And this is for a goddamn PHONE date, mind you. Not even a real, in person plan— which I prefer, by the way.

This past year has negatively impacted so many aspects of people’s lives, but I’ve been thinking a lot about the impact of this pandemic on friendships, specifically. My relationship with my husband is strong; same with our immediate families. But why am I feeling like so many of my friendships are struggling?

Well, it’s a simple explanation. I’m not seeing them.

Leo & I have erred more on the side of caution — especially since this past fall when we realized a second surge of the virus had hit— and as a result, keep our routines pretty simple. We go to work: him, in a mask, in an office, and me: virtually, in loungewear in our home on Long Island. All of the weekly errands we run and activities we do are in masks: things like the chiropractor (for both of us; getting older is fun!), Pilates (me), grocery shopping and pharmacy-type stores.

In terms of what we do more socially and for fun, well, that’s where it’s a bit more isolating. We don’t go to bars or restaurants. We don’t go to friend’s houses. We don’t travel. We don’t go to dinner parties or local breweries or steakhouses or any of the places we used to go pre-pandemic. We decided pretty early on in 2020 that we would continue to see our immediate families who live close by, so that’s helped immensely. Sometimes weekend plans simply just involve going to our parents or sibling’s houses to have a meal, hang with our nieces and nephews, and just get some in-person human interaction.

Because we need it.

But, we don’t see our friends. And while we do have some that live out of state or a significant drive away, we have quite a few local pals as well. And with busy lives and schedules that just won’t sync to get a proper phone catch up going, friendships are now reduced to vapid texts that often feel empty and cold. Not to mention, we’re all dealing with varying degrees of burnout, fatigue and demotivation — so after 5 straight days of work and constant video-chatting, a FaceTime with a friend can feel daunting. A text message gets read while you’re getting rung up at the grocery store, and you think to yourself: “I’ll respond when I get home!” but you forget. You play ‘phone tag’ with someone so often that you eventually just give up. It’s tiring, and it sucks.

Pre-pandemic, my life was still busy and I felt pretty unavailable to my friends during the work week. The difference is, on weekends we’d make up for it by making a slew of plans: brunch, drop-by’s at each other’s houses, a beach day, a birthday celebration. Without the ability to keep the momentum of a friendship going, you reduce the relationship to exchanging text messages like this one, after realizing you haven’t caught up in weeks:

It’s hard. Even harder? Being one of the few people in your friend group(s) who is being strict about the guidelines and continuing to quarantine and social distance. The only thing worse than “it sucks we ALL can’t see each other!” is knowing that your friends still might all be getting together… only, without you. There’s an isolation that comes with the decision to be a bit more cautious and careful than perhaps others in your life. You start to feel like you’re being given up on; seeing pictures of friends hanging out at dinner or on a mini road trip, when you weren’t even asked. And why WOULD they ask you? You wouldn’t go. Not right now, anyway.

It’s a shitty feeling when you feel like you’ve hit ‘pause’ on life, and yet you’re still watching people you know continue to live it and forge ahead while you watch virtually, from a distance. And there’s no judgment here: how you’ve chosen to live your life this past year is your choice. I recognize that even with as little as I do, I still might be doing a LOT more than others who have barely left their houses since March 2020. And this past summer, my husband and I were a bit more comfortable going places and seeing people. We’re all constantly learning to navigate this new life and all the challenges that comes with it. But simply put? I miss my friends.

I know we’re so close — hopefully mere months away — from going back to some legitimate normalcy (whatever that means) and texts will soon go from “I miss you! Maybe we can try to find a time to hop on the phone this week?” to, “I miss you! Can we hang this weekend?” or, “I miss you! When can I hop on a flight and come visit?”

But until then, be easy on your friends. If they’re seemingly distant or not as quick to reach out, they might be going through some stuff, not to mention maintaining a relationship on a screen/device is hard. Deciding to stay home and decline invites for social gatherings during a global pandemic isn’t personal, and while some of your friends might be social distancing — try to remember they’re not purposely distancing themselves from you.

Has the pandemic affected your friendships?

[christinegphillips]

Be The Best You Can Be And Do It Now

Be the best you can be. Why? Because you can do this and you can be great and you can be awesome and if you don’t then you will look back on life and wish that you had lived a more fulfilled lifestyle. You may be thinking that life is really hard and you can’t be the best you, but we are going to change that with my tips below on being the best you that you can possibly be.

You see most of us are brought up with the same education and live in our own little pockets. When you get out there in life however and you realize how much can be taken if you are willing to put in the effort that is that it will inspire you to be the best you can be. Rather than sitting on the sidelines and not following your dreams you will learn to take action and live the best life you possibly can.

After all we all want things in life, we all have hopes and dreams and the only thing stopping us is ourselves and our doubting nature that stops us from being the best we can be. When you learn to overcome these feelings and stop any overthinking as part of the process and take a proactive view of life. Then you will automatically see life for what it is.

Be the best you can be – Photo by Thought Catalog from Pexels

But how do you do it? How do you grab life by the balls and go damn it, this is what I want and I am going to do anything that I can to get it? How do you find that meaning in your life that drives you to want and get these things? Check out the tips below to find out more

My Top Tips On Being The Best You Can Be

Work out what you want – What does your dream life look like. What gets you excited, what makes you happy, what do you really desire to have in your life. This is an important aspect because when you know specifically what you want in life then you are way above the rest of the people out there just dreaming and going to work everyday but never achieving anything. When you clearly know what you want then move onto the next stage.

Start a plan – Write all the things down that you want in life and when you would like to achieve them by. It doesn’t matter when the overthinking comes in and says nah I will never be able to do it , I can’t achieve that. Just get it down on paper so you can look at it and reinforce what it is that you want in life.

Close your eyes – The one big thing successful people have is the ability to see themselves with their desires. That means using something like manifestation to have a clear view of what you want in your mind. That means if you want to live in a mansion with 8 bedrooms when you close your eyes you should be able to see yourself in there, feel what it is like, how happy you will feel and what value it has added to your life. This will train your subconscious mind to feel good about what you want and then by practicing being the best you can be, you can move onto the next stage.

Get to work – Now you have to start working out what you need to do to get what you want. It may seem like a massive mountain to climb but this is just the starting point. There is no rush for this as the universe will show you the way if you stay focused on what you want. You have to put in action here however to get there though. It might mean changing your job, your location, your skills and if you know what you have to do then just make a start. You will ending up finding yourself on the way, so don’t worry too much if you have doubts here by the end of these tips you will have more belief in yourself.

Be prepared to fail – This is the biggest stumbling block for most people because failure induces panic and feelings that you are unworthy and these should be avoided. If you want to be the best you can be then you must be willing to accept all failure as a challenge. So although you want to go into situations to win, accept that sometimes things will not work out and adapt next time and make it better. You will learn how to become a better person inside of you by doing this too as you will go stronger. Whilst everyone else will pack it in due to the first failure, you will keep growing and climbing and eventually get to live the life of your dreams.

Stay consistent – Being consistent in your approach is another big thing that you will want to learn as some days, you will be fraught with negativity. You will think i can’t do this, this is too much. But stay on top of your thoughts here and remain positive and just push yourself through it. Consistency is key to absolutely everything in life until we build everything in to a routine and a good habit which can take a few months to do.

Confidence is key – A lot of people try to be someone else or do things that are outside of their comfort zone and this just puts you off rather than spurs you on. So do things that you know that you are good at to build your confidence in the first place, once you have that base of confidence then do the things you are not so sure about. If you do as above and accept failure as part of the journey to this will give you more confidence along the way. People love confidence in others and they will want to be your friend, colleague, partner, customer as a result of you bestowing your confidence in them.

Love yourself – Learning to love yourself is key to being the best you can be. This means knowing who you are, what your values are, what type of person you are, what you are capable off. Being kind to yourself along the way and pushing yourself to achieve great things. When you can be critical of yourself and look to change and improve your life then this makes you massively powerful in your own life and others.

Stop any excuses – This is the biggest thing I see. If you want to be the best, then you have to put the effort in. This means not questioning yourself about things and just getting on and doing it. How many of you have said, yeah I’ll do it in a minute, or I’ll do it when, or I’ll do it when I can? I bet most of you right. There is no time like the present and if you want to be successful in life and be the best then you have to stop those excuses in their tracks and stay motivated.

Never ever give up – This is your path, this is what you want, so don’t give up a long the way. All that wasted effort and you will just be looking for something else to take its place and this will ruin your confidence when you were halfway there in the first place. When you put in the effort consistently all you have to work out is the right way of doing things. When you find the right way of doing it, you will be awesome and you will be great.

Be patient – Patience is a pain in the bum right? Because we want things and we want them now, we don’t want to wait, why should we wait, we should have everything we want right now. Unfortunately things don’t happen like that and being the best at something will take time and practice so hang in there. Don’t be disappointed if you miss the timescales, just do something to cheer yourself up again and move forward as quickly as you can.

Don’t let others put you off – Everyone has their own opinion of things, but it doesn’t mean they are right. What this will do is make you question yourself and your ability by someone that probably doesn’t know what they are talking about. So talk to your audience wisely and if you really want to be the best you, choose people who can help you, guide you and add value to what you are doing. Someone that can really help boost your confidence and not rip it to shreds. Learning to stay calm in these situations when people poo poo on your idea is paramount as you don’t want their thoughts to get into your head.

Educate yourself and reach out – Being the best, means working smarter not necessarily harder and there is a distinction here. For someone to win the 100M, they can’t just simply learn to run faster, they must train particular muscles, learn balance, be motivated, see themselves winning, eat a healthy diet etc. So find out who the winners are in your particular area and then ask them questions and let them help you become the best you.

This is up to you – Life is what you make it and this is up to you. You have the power within you to set goals in your life get out there and achieve them, overcome obstacles along the way, become the best, be motivated, stay positive. It just takes tenacity, consistency and then recording your events along the way. So you can do this, start thinking about getting out there and doing it.

Don’t compare yourself to others – We can all look at other people and think darn it, I am nowhere near as good as them, how can they do that. But you know what they are probably looking at you saying exactly the same thing. If we all had the same talent then things would be more competitive right? So never question yourself against someone else, just do more of what your doing and believe that you can do this, that you will be great and that you do deserve to the best you can be.

Recording – Rewards – Recognition – There is absolutely no point in trying to be the best if you don’t know what the best looks like. As an example you want to be a bodybuilder, you look in the mirror everyday and you see some gains and think yeah I’m doing alright. You become demotivated though because you are not making the gains you thought you should be. So you start taking measurements and your biceps have increased 1inch, your chest 2inches. Only by measuring your achievements will you ever find success. Then you have to reward yourself and recognize yourself for these achievements, because there is no point doing anything unless it makes you fee like you have accomplished something.

Hold yourself accountable – Hold yourself fully accountable for everything you do and don’t look to blame others, tools or whatever. You either put in the effort or you don’t, learn to tell yourself off when you are slacking, learn to motivate yourself when you don’t want to, know yourself inside out and just say I fucxxd up and I could of done better. Blaming others is not the way to go if you want to be the best.

Enjoy it – This should be fun. Mapping out your goals, working hard, achieving them, getting the rewards and the recognition for it, feeling accomplished and proud of what you did. So enjoy every minute of it and when it gets tough know that this is worth it and own it and put a smile back on your face.

Be Kind – Embrace Others – If you really want to be the best, then you should be kind to others, embrace them and help them along the way too. Everyone can succeed in life and we can all help each other do this. On our own we can be great with others help we can be awesome. So always spread kindness, love and do everything you can in life to succeed.

Gratitude – Be thankful and grateful if you have go this far that you now have the tenacity and hopefully the motivation and drive to get out there and smash like. Live it like you want it to be, achieve the things you want, then look back and just think darn it I am grateful I found the power inside to do this.

Be the best you can be frequently asked questions

How do you be the best you you can be? This about having the tenacity, consistency and hardworking effort to put everything you can into life. To control of your own destiny, improve consistently, do better at every opportunity, stay positive, release negativity, self critique yourself, have pride in what you do, accept failure, keep trying and do whatever you can to live your best life.

What does it mean to be the best version of yourself? I see this as being someone that yourself and other people admire. They look at you and know that you put everything you can into life, you try, you are caring, empathic but ultimately you have a goal set to add value to your own and other people’s lives. Some people think it is to compete with others but it isn’t it is all about the value you bring to every situation that come across in life. To go to bed at night feeling content that you are a good honest person that is putting everything they can into life.

How can I make myself better everyday? Set yourself goals to achieve and then record your behavior. See what you can improve on both physically and mentally. What did you do right, what did you do wrong, what can you improve on, how can you do it. Have a winning attitude that sets you up for the day. Walk out the door smiling with a purpose in mind and always have something that you can achieve every single day of your life.

How can I become powerful? Not too sure I like this question. You become powerful in yourself when you help other people. There is no hierarchical meaning to this and you should not look to control other people. But being powerful in yourself means learning to know yourself, get better at what you do, improve at every opportunity and have confidence in yourself. Have you ever seen someone walk into a room and own it? Sure you have that is the power of confidence in yourself and being the best you can be.

How do you just be yourself? This takes time to learn but living vicariously as someone else or thought someone else is just not healthy. You should always surround yourself with people that love you for who you are and the value you bring to the relationship. You don’t need to impress other people just be yourself and others will naturally gravitate towards you. Acting for others will only allow you to live uncomfortably and then when you want to be yourself people will be shocked as to your behavior. So build your confidence in yourself knowing that you are a good person and attract the right people into your life as a result of that.

So there you have it that is everything I have to say for now on be the best you can be. If you need a little help to get you there then check out my change your life program at https://changeyourlifeforever.co.uk

I will be there in daily videos to help you be that better person and succeed in life too. So I hope you do check it out and I would love to see you there. In the meantime, enjoy life, keep smiling and stay happy. Best wishes your friend Scott

Be The Best You Can Be And Do It Now published first on https://changeurlifeforever.blogspot.com/

[edwingqeb833-blog]

A Guide To Weight Loss & Control At Any Age

Introduction

If there is certainly a very important factor that all dietitians and obesity experts concur with, it can be that personal motivation will be the first step toward all weight loss success. No matter how healthy the diet-plan, or what mix of calories and nutrition it contains, it won't help anyone lose fat unless they follow it for too long enough. Their willingness to do this depends entirely on how motivated they may be to change their eating and employ habits to accomplish their weight loss goals.

Motivation Advice Hard To Find

The Internet comes with a bewildering variety of diets and weight reduction diet plans, but suggestions about motivation when dieting is extremely short supply. Given the strong link between diet-compliance and motivation, this lack of motivational assistance is surprising, as you would expect. It may stem from the undeniable fact that many diets are set up by people who lack hands-on experience of helping website visitors to manage how much they weigh. Perhaps they see weight-loss like a biological instead of a human process. If so, I think it's actually a mistake.

Motivating Yourself To Lose Weight

I tell my clients that starting a weight loss weight loss program is like starting a journey. And like every journey it takes preparation. We need to look ahead and plan the best way to overcome issues that occur along the way. By doing this we manage the task and greatly increase our chances of success.

Unfortunately, many dieters don't plan. Instead, they handle things as they come, and trust certain things: their initial enthusiasm, and (when this wears off) their willpower. But enthusiasm and willpower aren't enough to conquer the temptations and difficulties which we face if we try to switch our diet regime and lifestyle.

Stop for a moment and imagine taking all your family members with a camping trip. Do you depend upon your enthusiasm and willpower for food and shelter? Of course not. In all probability, spent hours beforehand carefully packing and be prepared for every eventuality, along with the whole trip is planned well outside in advance.

Yet once you start a diet-journey, most of you determine off without the sort of planning or preparation. It's as you believe that everything goes smoothly. But let's be honest, what diet ever runs smoothly? Answer: none! So what happens if we encounter a big problem? Answer: we wobble, and sometimes quit.

We Need To Plan New Thinking Habits

Planning a diet-journey doesn't involve packing equipment, it requires packing "new thoughts". We need to rehearse and adopt new methods for thinking to get over problems during our journey. This isn't psycho-babble - this is plain wise practice. After all, successful dieting is basically a matter of motivation and attitude. It's about how are you affected between our ears!

The Most Common Dieting Problem

The most frequent problem we face when dieting is boredom. This typically is the place our initial enthusiasm for losing weight wears off, and we become fed up with watching what we eat. We become dispirited and slightly depressed on the idea of getting to take care of our "sensible diet plan" while everyone else is apparently having a great time.

Losing Direction Leads To Boredom

We become bored when we lose our sense of direction. So to conquer it, we must reestablish where by we are going. Remember, dieting is just not an aimless process, it's really a journey from A to B. Here's the way you think if we lose direction:

I'm tired of dieting, it's a real pain. I don't have freedom any longer. I can't eat this, I can't eat that... I'm fed up. I can't share food using the girls in the office, I can't eat at the best restaurants, I must keep saying no to food when I visit friends, I need to watch my loved ones eating looking at me, I don't have plenty of time to exercise properly, I'm never going to lose weight and I'm feeling really miserable. Heck! Life is way too short for this...

This form of thinking is demotivating. It focuses exclusively around the negative areas of dieting and signals complete aimlessness. No fat loss goal is achievable if we think this way.

A Better Way of Thinking

Now let me show you some better alternatives. Please compare them with all the above example.

Example 1

Hmm, my diet isn't going so good. But I'm not going to make excuses. I've wasted the required time making excuses to myself. From now on, no matter what happens, I'm going, to tell the truth with myself. So what do I want? I want to lose weight and acquire myself into shape. Why? Because I want that beach holiday (and other very selfish goal) which I promised myself. I want it so bad I can touch it! Okay, so I should try to learn the best way to eat properly - big deal! I can certainly try this if I put my thoughts to it. Heck! Eating good food isn't difficult. What's difficult is seeing myself being overweight through out my entire life. I want something better. Something as good as a fistful of nachos or perhaps a dollop of fatty dessert.

Example 2

Hmm, my diet isn't going so great. So allow me to remind myself why I'm dieting. All my entire life I've been eating to please other people. My mom said eat this", so I ate it. My school friends said "have some of this", so I had lots. My work colleagues now say "possess a slice on this", so I have two! And my children say "you must try this", so I try it. And every time I make an effort to slim down, everyone says "forget about your diet, eat a number of this" so I do. Well, that's enough! No more eating to please other folks. Today I'm going to start eating to please me. And what pleases me will be the idea of wearing a size (?) dress to my daughter's wedding (or another very selfish goal). I realize I need to nibble on properly, but this can be a ridiculously tiny price to pay for achieving achieve. Heck! Eating good food isn't difficult. What's difficult is carrying my extra weight around throughout the day. I want something better. Something as good as a 4-cheese pizza or even a box of cookies."

Example 3

Hmm, my diet isn't going as smoothly as I thought it will. Never mind, I'm sure this is quite normal. I can't expect to switch my regular diet regime without a few hiccups in the process. Besides, I'm searching for a lot more than the matter of minutes of ale I get from filling my stomach with junk. I want a very long time of pleasure - real pleasure from looking great and being taken seriously and who knows, maybe getting a great partner. I know others see me like a fat person - goodness, from time to time I do too! - but that is exactly WHY I want to switch. I'm sick and tired of being fat. Real tired. And if this implies learning the way to eat good food, then let's take action! And when it gets tough I'm going to login to Anne Collins forum and acquire help. All I know is, I want to make it happen!

Example 4

Hmm, my diet isn't going as smoothly as I thought it would. This morning I watched my colleagues have a whole birthday cake - it looked delicious - and I sat there feeling miserable and deprived. Then I went for lunch using a friend and opt for tuna salad while she ate half a pizza accompanied by two slices of cheesecake. It was torture! But then I started thinking to myself what's more important - a couple of slices of cheesecake, or perhaps a lean shape?" And I decided that looking good was what I wanted. I know that it's not possible overnight, in case I can persevere and learn good eating habits along the way, I know I'm gonna make it..."

Example 5

Hmm, my diet isn't going as smoothly as I thought it would. But at the very least it isn't really a race. So who cares if I have several wobbly moments, providing I get where I want to go. At 26 I'm in the prime of my well being, and I want to make probably the most from it. I'm sick and tired with my slim friends getting all the best guys. I want to turn a couple of heads myself. I want the interest and I desire to be taken seriously, and when I need to spend 1 year dieting - heck! I'm gonna get it done. Last week I saw a pal of mine within the hospital who lost a leg in a car crash. The doctors say it requires her 1 year to relearn the best way to walk. Now which is tough. By comparison, my journey is not hard. And as long as I keep reminding myself on this, I'll be fine.

Points To Remember

1. A weight loss program is an outing from A to B.

2. Feeling bored is often a sign we have been losing our direction.

3. When we lose direction we have to regain it, fast!

4. The way to regain direction is usually to remind yourself that are used for dieting.

5. You are dieting because you want something superior to a plate of fattening food.

Getting Help To Lose Weight

Changing our diet regime is less difficult once we get support from others. So make sure your internet weight management plan includes membership of an forum. Because only people can offer you the form of encouragement you need to achieve your own personal weight reduction goals.

[jaredxace506-blog]

10 Things You Have In Common With Weight Loss & Control

Introduction

If there exists another thing that dietitians and obesity experts concur with, it can be that personal motivation could be the foundation all weight-loss success. No matter how healthy the diet-plan, or what blend of calories and nutrition its content has, it's not going to help anyone slim down unless they follow it for very long enough. Their willingness to take action depends entirely on how motivated they may be to alter their eating and workout habits to realize their weight loss goals.

Motivation Advice Hard To Find

The Internet supplies a bewildering variety of diets and weight loss diet plans, but tips on motivation when dieting is in extremely short supply. Given the strong link between diet-compliance and motivation, this lack of motivational guidance is surprising, to put it mildly. It may stem in the fact that many diets are made by individuals who lack hands-on connection with helping website visitors to manage how much. Perhaps they see weight loss being a biological instead of a human process. If so, I think it is a mistake.

Motivating Yourself To Lose Weight

I tell all my clients that starting a fat loss diet is like starting a trip. And like every journey it requires preparation. We need to look ahead and plan how you can overcome issues that occur on the way. By doing this we manage the task and greatly increase our probability of success.

Unfortunately, many dieters don't plan. Instead, they take things while they come, and are based upon a couple of things: their initial enthusiasm, and (if this wears off) their willpower. But enthusiasm and willpower aren't enough to beat the temptations and difficulties which we face once we try to improve our diet regime and lifestyle.

Stop for a moment and imagine taking your family on a camping trip. Do you depend upon your enthusiasm and willpower for food and shelter? Of course not. In all probability, spent hours beforehand carefully packing and be prepared for every eventuality, and the whole trip is well planned in advance.

Yet once you begin a diet-journey, lots of you determine off without the form of planning or preparation. It's that you are convinced that everything goes smoothly. But let's face it, what diet ever runs smoothly? Answer: none! So what happens if we encounter a major problem? Answer: we wobble, and sometimes quit.

We Need To Plan New Thinking Habits

Planning a diet-journey doesn't require packing equipment, it involves packing "new thoughts". We need to rehearse and adopt new means of thinking to overcome problems during our journey. This isn't psycho-babble - this really is plain sound judgment. After all, successful dieting is basically dependent on motivation and attitude. It's about how are you affected between our ears!

The Most Common Dieting Problem

The most popular problem we face when dieting is boredom. This typically occurs when our initial enthusiasm for losing weight wears off, so we become tired of watching the food we eat. We become dispirited and slightly depressed at the idea of needing to maintain our "sensible eating habits" while everyone else seems to be enjoying themselves.

Losing Direction Leads To Boredom

We lose interest when we lose our a sense direction. So to get over it, we must reestablish where by we are going. Remember, dieting isn't an aimless process, it is a journey from A to B. Here's the way you think if we lose direction:

I'm bored with dieting, it's this kind of pain. I don't have got freedom anymore. I can't eat this, I can't eat that... I'm completely fed up. I can't share food with the girls at work, I can't get your meals at my favorite restaurants, I need to keep saying no to food when I visit friends, I must watch my children eating facing me, I don't have the time to exercise properly, I'm never going to lose fat and I'm feeling really miserable. Heck! Life is too short for this...

This type of thinking is demotivating. It focuses exclusively for the negative areas of dieting and signals complete aimlessness. No weight-loss goal is achievable once we think similar to this.

A Better Way of Thinking

Now allow me to demonstrate some better alternatives. Please compare them using the above example.

Example 1

Hmm, my diet isn't going so excellent. But I'm not going to make excuses. I've wasted the required time making excuses to myself. From now on, no matter what happens, I'm going, to be honest with myself. So what do I want? I want to slim down and obtain myself into shape. Why? Because I want that beach holiday (or some other very selfish goal) which I promised myself. I want it so bad I can touch it! Okay, so I should try to learn the way to eat properly - huge problem! I can easily do this if I put my head for it. Heck! Eating good food isn't difficult. What's difficult is seeing myself obesity throughout my life. I want something better. Something superior to a fistful of nachos or a dollop of fatty dessert.

Example 2

Hmm, my diet isn't going so excellent. So permit me to remind myself why I'm dieting. All my well being I've been eating to please people. My mom said eat this", so I ate it. My school friends said "have a number of this", so I had lots. My work colleagues now say "have a slice of the", so I have two! And my children say "you must try this", so I do it. And every time I try to lose fat, everyone says "forget about your diet, eat a number of this" so I do. Well, that's enough! No more eating to please other people. Today I'm going to start eating to impress me. And what pleases me could be the concept of wearing a size (?) dress to my daughter's wedding (or any other very selfish goal). I realize I need to eat properly, but this really is a ridiculously tiny price to pay for achieving my goal. Heck! Eating good food isn't difficult. What's difficult is carrying my excess fat around throughout the day. I want something better. Something a lot better than a 4-cheese pizza or a box of cookies."

Example 3

Hmm, my diet isn't going as smoothly as I thought it will. Never mind, I'm sure that is quite normal. I can't expect to switch my regular eating routine with no few hiccups along the way. Besides, I'm seeking more than the few minutes of enjoyment I get from filling my stomach with junk. I want an eternity of pleasure - real pleasure from looking good and being taken seriously and you never know, maybe obtaining a great partner. I know other people see me like a fat person - goodness, from time to time I do too! - but that is exactly WHY I want to switch. I'm sick and tired with being fat. Real tired. And if therefore learning how to eat good food, then let's do it! And when it gets tough I'm going to login to Anne Collins forum and get help. All I know is, I want to do it!

Example 4

Hmm, my diet isn't going as smoothly as I thought it could. This morning I watched my colleagues follow a whole birthday cake - it looked delicious - and I sat there feeling miserable and deprived. Then I went for lunch having a friend and decided on a tuna salad while she ate half a pizza as well as two slices of cheesecake. It was torture! But then I started thinking to myself what's more vital - a couple of slices of cheesecake, or perhaps a lean shape?" And I decided that looking good was what I wanted. I know that it is not possible overnight, however, if I can persevere and learn good eating routine along the way, I know I'm gonna allow it to be..."

Example 5

Hmm, my diet isn't going as smoothly as I thought it might. But at the very least it isn't a race. So who cares if I have a number of wobbly moments, as long as I get where I want to go. At 26 I'm in the prime of my well being, and I intend to make the most of it. I'm sick and tired of my slim friends getting best wishes guys. I want to turn several heads myself. I want the attention and I need to be considered genuine, of course, if I have to spend 12 months dieting - heck! I'm gonna get it done. Last week I saw a buddy of mine inside the hospital who lost a leg in a car crash. The doctors say it takes her 12 months to relearn the way to walk. Now which is tough. By comparison, my journey is easy. And so long as I keep reminding myself with this, I'll be fine.

Points To Remember

1. A meals are an outing from A to B.

2. Feeling bored is often a sign we're losing our direction.

3. When we lose direction we have to regain it, fast!

4. The way to regain direction is usually to remind yourself that are used for dieting.

5. You are dieting since you want something superior to a plate of fattening food.

Getting Help To Lose Weight

Changing our eating routine is much simpler when we get support from others. So make certain your online weight reduction plan includes membership of a forum. Because only people can provide you the kind of encouragement you may need to achieve your own personal weight reduction goals.