Tumgik
#but i don't want anyone to think i'm cool with that
thaatdigitaldiary · 2 days
Text
Tumblr media
for the first time
hopkins paige bueckers x hopkins fem reader
for a long time, paige didn’t know why she felt the way she did about her best friend, someone who she “wasn’t” supposed to love, she didn’t want to ruin things. it was unfortunate she didn’t know you were waiting for her first. (kinda got this idea while listening to bags by clairo so i hope this makes your heart tingle and your eyes water!)
fluff and flirtationnnn (ofc🙏🏽), slight angst & minor argument, internal homophobia, cuteness and clarity at the end | this is lengthy! i hope ya like
enjoy!🙂‍↕️
disclaimer: i write nothing but angst or fluff when it comes to hopkins p, considering she was in highschool. thank you! - im considering this a “throwback story” so i can make a part two for older reader and older paige. 🫶🏽
paige and you were completely different when it came to high school. her priorities consisted of basketball, her future career, and passing senior year so she can make way to uconn. you however, were all about academics. you were in basically any club available, maintained a 4.0 gpa, and quickly climbed the rank of class president. how you two met was random, your sophomore year you were in photography club, meaning you took pictures of all the sports teams for the yearbook, and she stayed behind to talk to you.
"cool ass camera." she said going to touch it, but you quickly swat her hand away.
"hey! no touching. you break you buy." you say slightly stern, pointing your finger at her.
"technically YOU'D have to buy, this has nothing to do with me." she says laughing and shrugging her shoulders, getting a smile out of you. for her first time seeing you smile, she sure was in love with it.
"okay "miss photographer", what's your name?" she asks you, hoping she can get to know you. "mine's paige."
"i know, i see you all the time, you're like.. the best basketball player here." you say bragging on her, feeling kind of shy when you give away that you're a big fan of her.
"oh really, you think so?" she says in a flirty tone while she flexes, making you blush out of nervousness.
"okay, okay, don't get too in your head now, but yeah, you're really good. i'm the one who records and snaps all your shots. but my name is y/n, since you asked." you say with such a sweet voice, something that sent her in a trance, completely dazed in the sound of you speaking.
"cute name. hey uh, i was gonna ask did you need any help packing this stuff up, i won't break it i promise." paige says chuckling, her smile pure and full of life, an image that stayed in your head since you met her.
two years pass, and you and paige can never separate. despite being utter opposites of each other, you're glued to the hip. you still did photography, getting the best candid photos of your best friend on the court, excited to post them on social media so she gets the attention she deserves. you gathered the pictures together and created a collage to post on instagram.
you were paige's biggest fan to say the least, buying a hoodie with her name and number on it, and being able to sit on the sidelines and watch her play, with your photographer privilege of course. anytime she made a three, she'd point at you, making you smile. watching her play was something you couldn't get enough of, learning the game so you could understand when she was frustrated with a play, or if she just rambled on to you about it, you'd know exactly what she was talking about.
paige and your bond grew stronger, going to family events together, having sleepovers every weekend, even during the week, as well as going on family trips with her. you felt like you had your person when it came down to paige. you didn't really know much about anyone at your school, and you definitely didn't expect the school's star basketball player to befriend you.
life wasn't always so peachy though. you really struggled finding yourself. for a long time you were confused, not when it came to school, when it came down to your feelings. ever since you met paige, there was this feeling you couldn't shake, this feeling of nurture and love that you gained from her, the type no one else could give you. growing up, you weren't one to express your feelings to your parents. they were always busy, super strict, and for some reason never found too much time for you. but paige, she always dropped anything even if meant seeing you for 5 minutes.
the first time paige saw you, she noticed how you radiated positive energy, even though she had no clue what you were going through at home. all she wanted was to be the person by your side through thick and thin, forever and always.
with about a month and a half of school left, paige and her teammates took home the trophy for the final game of the season, and you were more than proud for her, ecstatic even. when the final buzzer went off for the end of the game, paige made a 3 pointer, beating the buzzer. you stood up and cheered as loud as you could, while paige ran towards you and swiftly lifted you up into a hug, making your feet dangle in the air.
"i'm so proud of you p." you said, muffled into her shoulder, as you feel her start to tear up from her words, and one of her biggest achievements.
"i really couldn't have done it without you, you're my motivation y/n." you feel a catch in your throat, signaling you're about to cry, and she quickly wipes your tears.
her family takes you both out to eat, and you had a duffel bag in their trunk that you packed the night before, so you could stay over at paige's house tonight.
after eating and making it to paige's place, you and paige made it up to her room, where she dropped her bags and your duffel that she insisted on carrying so you didn't "hurt your pretty hands" as she'd say. her room has evolved so much over the years, furniture moved around, basketball posters growing on the walls every visit, but one thing that never changed, was the framed picture of you and her on your nightstand, you on her back after her first win, both of your smiles bright and lively. the same picture lingered on her lockscreen ever since you two took it, your lockscreen being a picture you and her took at a sleepover at your house, you two under a fuzzy olive green blanket, exceptionally close for "best friends", but you never really cared.
that's another thing when it came down to paige, you never really cared. sure, questions and rumors spread, "are y/n and paige together?" "is paige gay?" "what's y/n's sexuality?"
it got annoying after a while, and paige and you always seemed to avoid the questions, and simply ignore them. it sucked that you wondered the same thing though. that was a sensitive topic, you couldn't ask paige about that, what if she finds you weird and stops talking to you?
you though, you should've been asking yourself that question. you've dated one guy throughout high school, and sure you liked him, (so you thought), but he was rude and belittling. after a conversation with paige, you immediately broke up with him. "he's not good enough for you," she said to you, always knowing what was best.
the real question was, what really was good enough for me?
paige never dated anyone in highschool, she turned down girls AND guys, so it made it extra hard to read her, even though you knew her like a book, cover page to the summary on the back of it. you wanted to know, but you didn't want to lose her in the midst of your curiosity.
sitting on paige's bed, you took your shoes off and got comfortable like you usually do, and she took off her practice gear and sat next to you.
"thank you for always being here for me y/n, like seriously." she sounds so genuine and would do anything to keep you here forever.
"p, i'm always gonna be here for you, you're my best friend." you go to embrace her, her muscular arms holding you close, your perfume lingering in her nose, making her feel at home.
you and her let go and look at each other for a while, eye contact never breaking, when she leans in for a kiss, and you let her in. the kiss is slow, as she tries to learn your body language, the kiss is meaningful, but is cut short when she starts freaking out.
"jesus christ y/n i'm sorry."
"i didn't mean to do that, it was an accident,"
an accident?
"oh, uh, yeah it's fine." you say, confused on what the big deal was, you've been wanting to do that forever, but i guess things weren't reciprocated.
things quickly got awkward, and then paige says something that honestly breaks your heart a little.
"maybe you shouldn't stay the night tonight, i uh, got family stuff."
you knew that wasn't true, she just didn't want you around after a moment like this just happened. but why is she shutting it down?
"you don't wanna talk first, i mean a lot just happened i think we should ta-" you try to explain to her when she cuts you off.
"just go home y/n." her voice cold and bleak, making you queasy.
paige was never like this with you, can a kiss really change everything? you thought asking your best friend a question would make you lose her, but you two KISSED. your heart dropped to your feet with the thoughts swarming in your head, "is she gonna leave me?" being the main one.
the next day rolls around, it was 12:30, the time she usually got back home after practicing with her dad, and you’ve received no sign of her, no texts or missed facetimes, which was unusual since you promised each other two years ago you'd try to facetime every. single. day. "she just needs time," you thought to yourself, but you text her anyway.
"hey paigeyyy, i'm gonna go to the store later, did you want me to pick anything up for you? i can drop by your house and give it to you?"
read 12:35pm
she read your message, but didn't respond until ten minutes later with a simple and dry "no" which made you sigh and move on about the day.
you missed paige. you slowly start to regret last night, but there's nothing you can do to change it. you already miss her face, her hugs, her lips, and how she looked at you. you open your camera roll to see a picture you and her took last night after her game, her holding you bridal style while you hold up her trophy, both of you smiling at each other. you put your phone down and decide to lay down for the rest of the day, as you had no motivation to do anything knowing your best friend didn't even wanna speak to you.
but deep down it was more than that, you had really fallen for paige, not wanting anyone but her, was that so wrong?
paige on the other hand, was losing it. she didn't know what to do with herself. there was no way she liked girls, let alone her best friend.
so why did she kiss her?
she wanted answers, but she couldn't and didn't want to talk to anyone about it, scared of how others would perceive her, worried she'd lose people over this, and worst of all, she didn't want to lose her best friend. she had to push her away, she needed space to think.
she thought there was nothing wrong with that, but it was the worst thing she could've done.
a week passes, neither of you are talking much, you haven't facetimed in what seems like forever, and her responses to you are weak and bland, making you feel as if she's not interested in talking to you anymore.
prom is approaching, you and paige planned to go together, to dance, make fun of other peoples dancing, and have another lively moment before summer break. but after that night, you're not sure what you two are gonna do, mainly because the day of prom, paige hadn't texted you at all. you weren't gonna go since you figured she wasn't, but you needed to get out of bed and go do something fun to get your mind off of the situation.
a couple hours go by, and you're finished getting ready. you have on an all black floor length dress, with small purple accents, since you already pre picked it out, intending to match with paige. you took your pictures with your parents, and drove to the school, as prom was being held in the gym this year.
you get there, hands clammy from your nervousness. you hate being here without paige, you wanted to take so many pictures, make so many memories, slow dance, and this was gonna be the night you were ACTUALLY planning on kissing her for the first time, showing her how long you've loved her.
the whole time you've been standing around looking bored, knowing you'd have so much fun if paige were here. that's until a guy from the football team comes up to you, asking you to dance with him. you insist, as you have nothing better to do. a slow song starts, and you and him are dancing slowly, until you notice a familiar face walk in the gym. paige.
she sees you and him and storms off to the bathroom, furious at the fact that you looked so beautiful, and that she wasn't the one with hands around your waist, taking in all your beauty.
you excuse yourself from his grasp, walking towards the bathroom, letting it clear out before you walk in.
"hey.." you say softly, not wanting to come off aggressive as if she hasn't been talking to you in what seemed like ages.
"what the fuck is he doing slow dancing with you? that was our thing y/n." she says, sort of yelling at you, but you quickly retaliate.
"no paige. you don't get to be mad at me because YOU shut me out. all i wanted to do was talk to you, you made me feel crazy, like something was wrong with me." you say, starting to cry.
"you completely went ghost on me, since before that night i've wanted no one but you, but i guess it doesn't matter,"
"i didn't come with him, he just asked me to dance because i looked bored, so i said yes." you tell her, looking at the tiled bathroom floor.
paige cups your chin and pulls your head up so you can look her in the eyes.
"i'm sorry y/n. i shouldn't have ran from you, i was scared. i really did mean to kiss you, just not like that. i wanted it to be special, i wanted it to be while we danced. i thought he was about to take that opportunity away from me. it woulda been memorable y'know?" she says while looking deep in your eyes, hoping you'd forgive her. “i know i’ve been acting weird, i just didn’t know what to do if i lost you.”
"i was also scared of what people would think of me, yknow, liking girls and shit. especially liking you, you're perfect, i didn't wanna ruin anything for you."
you don't respond immediately, until she says what's been on her mind since she met you.
"i'm in love with you, y/n. i've loved you since the first time i met you, you keep me sane, and without you i was losing my shit. there’s nothing wrong with you ma, and i apologize for making you feel that way."
your eyes go a little bit wider, and you finally respond, "i love you too paige, i always have. forget what other people think p, nobody matters but me with you." you smile wide at her and she smiles back, finally feeling content with herself, knowing she said what needed to be said, and could kiss you whenever she wanted to.
she leans in to kiss you, but you stop her.
"what cmon, i can't kiss you now?" she said to you while rolling her eyes.
"you said you wanted it to be special right?" you grab her hand and hold it for a while.
"yes ma'am i did," she says, leading you out of the bathroom and back to the gym, where another slow song has started. she quickly rests her hands on your waist, your hands on her shoulders, as you two sway to the song blasting through the cheap speakers the school borrowed.
"god, you look beautiful baby." paige says, finally taking in all of your perfection. your hair, makeup, and jewelry aligned perfectly, fitting you so well, she just loved looking at you. before you two continue dancing, she pulls her phone out of her dress pants pocket, and while she does so you take a good look at her. she looks stunning. a black button up and black dress pants, a silver chain completing the look. she goes to her camera app, and you kiss her on the cheek as a pose for the picture. she snaps multiple and eagerly changes her lockscreen.
"i love seeing this beautiful face everytime i turn my phone on," she says, you roll your eyes out of her corniness, but it still makes you blush. you also take a picture of the two of you, and you update your lockscreen as well.
"and i love seeing yours, and plus, this button up looks a little too good on you," you tell her, making her bite her lip slightly.
she grabs your hand and twirls you, bringing you back in, your faces exceptionally close to one another. the slow song comes to and end, and paige takes one hand off of your waist to cup your face, and connects her lips with yours and utters the words that make you happy to have met her,
"i love you y/n."
"i love you too paige."
and for the first time, you knew you had a forever person, and that person was paige bueckers.
HEY BAD BITCHESSS!! I HOPE YOU ENJOYEDDD I KNOW THERE’S NOT MANY HOPKINS FICS OUT THERE SO I WANTED TO TRY! i’ll try and be consistent with posting, just bare with me 🙂‍↕️ love you
tags: @rosemariiaa @mrsarnold @wbbgetsmewetter
🫶🏽🫶🏽
the collage that “would’ve been posted”
Tumblr media
315 notes · View notes
therandomfando4 · 2 days
Text
Hey, so I think I might have figured this code out in the newest Smg4 video, maybe?
Tumblr media
Okay, so, this is the original code.
11-12-1-19 2-1-11: 2
First, I changed the numbers into letters by using the alphabet. 1 being A, 2 being B, 3 being C, and so on. Which gave me this:
K L A S B A K B
Which confused me until I changed two letters around. Making this.
K L B S B A K A
Swapped 2 & 1
11-12-2-19 2-1-11: 1
I immediately tied this to Smg3 as he says "Baka," a fair bit in Smg4. But I wasn't convinced it meant anything until I figured out that almost all of the numbers were doubled except for 12 & 19.
I figured 12 out pretty fast. But 19 took me a while to figure out. With 12, I remembered something about the number being in the 3 timetables, and that it was the 4th number.
3 × 4 = 12
34..
When I figured this out, I was still doubtful. Since I knew the creatives on the show sometimes fuel the ship, why is it being hidden like as though it's important? On a classified document, and with Mr. Puzzles?
So I just thought it was some kind of coincidence and that it was something deeper or that the code ultimately meant nothing and that I was just wasting my time on it. Besides, 19 didn't mean anything, right?
Yes and no.
I was right about the number itself, not meaning anything until I used additions.
What two numbers made up 19?
9 + 10..
After seeing those two numbers, I instantly thought of a certain meme.
youtube
Now it was 21.. I searched up what time tables could go into 21, the two numbers being 3 and 7.
3 × 7 = 21
I first thought about the number 3, which I realised was kinda stupid of me once I remembered the numbers that made up 7 were 3 and 4.
3 + 4 = 7
Either these somehow are 3 coincidences, or really is about Smg34.
Now, unless there is more that I'm missing in this code. I have a few guesses. (If anyone can think of anything else, I'd love to know.)
The classified document is most likely an image or YouTube thumbnail.
If it's a thumbnail, I believe it could be either:
A. Wotfi 2023
This one is because Mr. Puzzles had a YouTube thumbnail of the Puzzlevision movie, and I was thinking about how wotfi 2023 was the last big event before Puzzlevision. As well as Smg3 and Smg4 being the highlighted characters in it.
B. Snowtrapped..
Okay.. I know it has been milked to death by people submitting it for the Wotfi 2024 challenges. But, I feel like it could explain why it's in the document and considered classified. I'm not a fan of this one.
C. A thumbnail for a future episode.
Idk if it would make sense, but eh.. it could be cool.
Now, just some or one of the images that could be in the document.
A. Smg3's notebook.
An image of it or the physical book itself.
B. The drawing at the end of Smg3's notebook
Because it's still a secret to everyone that Smg3 drew a picture of him and Smg4 hanging out together.
C. An image of Smg3 and 4 hanging out or doing something that would be considered gay. Something that would embarrass Smg3 and/ or 4 probably.
Either way, if none of these options are right, I'm hoping we actually get to see what's in the document or that the code is foreshadowing something.
I also used pager codes mixed with the baka I found before. I found these sentences, but I don't know if the creatives behind Smg4 meant for someone to use pager codes.
Swapped 2 & 1
(11)-(12-2)-(21) 2-1-11:1
K L B U B A K A
You. I want you. Home. Baka.
Swapped 2 & 1
(11)-(12-2)-(19) 2-1-11:1
K L B U  B A K A
You. I want you. Yes. Baka.
Or
You. I want you. Hug. Baka.
As I said, I have no idea if the pager codes were planned or coincidental.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Anyway, I'd like to hear what other people think about my findings. And if others have found anything of their own.
This took me a while. If I find out this was a waste of time, I'm going to be so upset. /hj
Have a good one, guys.
76 notes · View notes
Text
Fall mansion rambles
I'm just in a fall mood today so I wanted to do some fall-themed rambles because listen, listen, I feel like everyone in the mansion fucking loves fall.
They play different music year-round, and I feel like Liu as the resident jazz lover breaks out his jazz records and just plays them for everyone to hear and it sets the MOOD. The mansion feels so much cozier with the sound of Autumn jazz drifting through it, and it puts everyone at ease.
Then, the DECORATING. They go all out in the mansion for Halloween, and they do a mix of general fall decorations and Halloween decorations, everyone decorating the outside and inside of the mansion until they pretty much run out of decorations. Also, they totally have that one decoration from Target that says "I am Lewis" and he's right at the entrance of the mansion, I will not hear otherwise.
Tim and Slender really break into their fall baking, constantly making new pies and cookies for everyone to eat, and they get devoured. The two of them bake so many fucking pumpkin pies from September to the end of November that it's ridiculous, but every single one is eaten in like a day or two with how many people are in the mansion. I feel like Tim is the drink maker for everyone, and he's always making fresh hot cocoa or something that is pumpkin spice flavored for everyone to enjoy, and it just sets the mood so well. They light the fireplace and just all gather around it eating pumpkin pie and their respective hot drinks and it's the best vibe ever.
Speaking of pumpkins, by the way, DECORATING THEM! I feel like Helen helps everyone every year carve or paint their own pumpkins if they need help, and he supplies all of the tools for it. Slender takes them all to a huge pumpkin patch and lets every single creep pick out a pumpkin or two that they really want and they all have a good time running through the pumpkin fields. I can just see them all sitting together at Slender's long ass dining table, every creep making their own pumpkin. I think they would all be set out on the porch, all stacked together and placed wherever anyone wants theirs to be, and if any of them start rotting they'll make another one to replace it. I feel like Toby gets the most excited about carving and painting pumpkins and I can see him decorating at least like 10 of them by the time Halloween rolls around. If he could he'd do more than that but I feel like he tries not to go too overboard.
Then all the talk of who's dressing up for Halloween, and what everyone is going to be going as. I feel like I could see Trender stopping by and literally offering to make everyone's costumes for them like it's a yearly tradition for him to just show up randomly with a fuck ton of supplies, and I can see Jason pitching in and helping too. The two of them just spend their free time customizing everyone's costumes exactly how they want them, talking and chatting over some tea and the piles of fabric in front of them.
I don't know why specifically, but I just get the vibe that fall into winter is the happiest time of the year in the mansion as a whole, not that they don't have spring and summer joyful times, but I just feel like the vibes are so good that everyone is more relaxed. They're all calm and at peace and content, with less fighting, less sadness, just wonderfully calm cool fall times.
63 notes · View notes
Text
How Jason and Roy became friends at a Burger King
Jason Todd: You seem familiar, have I threatened you in the past?
Roy Harper: Did you sell me China cat when I was addicted to heroin?
Jason Todd sits down at the table.
Jason: I'm sorry, I need to know more because we might be friends now. Oh shoot I think I do know you.
Roy: Are you selling me drugs?
Jason: Nope. Hey... did you shoot arrows and dress like peter pan?
Roy: It... it was more robin hood inspired.
Jason: Red hair... arrows... robin hood... Oh you're that moron's, Arrow, sidekick! Oh my God, it's so good to see you again! How you been?
Roy: On... heroin, falling out with Arrow, got married, had a daughter, lost custody, was on heroin and recovering.
Jason: Awesome, you are comfortable to tell me all of this. I like that.
Roy: I ain't got nothing left to lose. How do you know who I am?
Jason: I'll go with my trauma, okay, I was the second robin, died by the joker, was revived from the lazarus pit, went insane, worked with the ghuls for a few years, found Batman, tried to kill him, failed, crazy times man.
Jason laughs and then sighs. Roy stares at him confused.
Jason: I am not making up a single thing I said... My name is Jason Todd, you met me before when I was a kid, oh and I fought my brother Nightwing and this annoying spoiled brat named Tim.
Roy: Oh my God, you're not lying. I was there when you made fun of his dead mom.
Jason: That's me!
Roy Harper: You're Jason Todd... Didn't you die?
Jason Todd: Yes, for 5 years actually, but then I wasn't... then I went insane... I'm kind of insane at the moment and I murder horrible people for money... And vengeance, but the money helps.
Jason pours salt in his glass of water and chugs it. Roy looks around confused.
Roy (worried): Are you selling me drugs? Is this a test? Where's Green Arrow? I promised I wouldn't do them again.
Jason (concerned): No. I'm not selling drugs... I have cigarettes but I don't want that for a former drug addict. I just want to be friends with you... I want to... help you. I never got to do that with other drug addicts, and you look cool. I remember you were... the only guy nice to me.
Roy: I don't... I mean it was common human decency. When you died I was sad, on china cat, but sad.
Jason: Can we hang out then? Can I be your friend? Please.
Roy: Um, sure... I'm kind of friends with Nightwing at times.
Jason: Not anymore, you're my friend! We are friends! Nobody will take that from us! I will buy us bracelets. I heard a lot about you after I died and you are the perfect guy friend I could EVER have.
Roy (sincere): That was the nicest thing anyone has said to me.
Jason: I mean it too! I have not had friends in a while.
Roy: I can tell, but we're in a burger king so... this isn't the oddest thing that has happened in here.
Jason: This is great. What do you want to do? Go to a movie, a mission, a mission and a movie?
Roy: Okay, um, a mission if I can get paid.
Jason: Bitchin' let's go!
Jason stands up and yanks Roy out of his chair and they run out of the burger king.
46 notes · View notes
chaifootsteps · 3 days
Note
headcanon that while Mordecai is uncomfortable with touch, Viktor is a very physically affectionate person. he respects Mordecai's boundaries but once he starts noticing his colleague is cool with Viktor touching him, it makes him very happy
saw this artwork and also had a thought: https://www.tumblr.com/lordofdestructionm/723711082521329664/delicate-small-hands-held-by-large-rough-ones
Viktor likes handholding a lot and he especially like how small Mordecai's hands are compared to his. first he thinks this is just Normal Couple Stuff but he realizes over time there's more to it
of course it makes him feel good to be the larger one of the pair because he wants to protect Mordecai despite knowing he can handle himself. but it also reminds him that no matter how scary and sharply dressed Mordecai becomes, the young man with human weaknesses and vulnerabilities is still under there somewhere. it makes him hope he's not losing Mordecai completely to the love of violence Atlas is more than happy to encourage in him
he has the same feeling when he conspires to have Mordecai dress in his clothes when he sleeps over. Viktor's clothes are too big on Mordecai so it reminds him of when he first met Mordecai and he was just a shabbily dressed young man. he's glad Mordecai didn't have to stay poor and starving and enjoys a job done well at the Lackadaisy, but he's still worried on some level that Atlas won't stop until he turns Mordecai into a heartless killing machine who cares for no one. it's why he's happy to argue with Mordecai about something stupid like symmetry or grammar - it means Mordecai still cares about things other than putting Atlas' enemies in the ground
on a lighter note the touching is everyone else's first tip of that Something Is Up with these two because Mordecai gets very cranky when anyone lays a paw on him - but with Viktor he doesn't even notice. Mitzi spots it first, because of course she does
Anon, I don't know if this was your intention but I'm awash in the mental image of Viktor kissing Mordecai's hand beans. Bless you for this.
26 notes · View notes
solar-sunnyside-up · 2 days
Note
Hey, I’m sorry to dump this on ya but your blog gives me a lotta hope and I just wondered if you had anything to say to my current ails- I am but a very anxious teen and I am so scared. I see so many people talking of how the world “Will end in 2040” or how “damn the past was so much better because it was simpler” and I am lowkey starting to believe that. I’ve got a problem with romanticizing a past I wasn’t even a part of and I really don’t want to live in some awful dystopian future and I fear I’ve missed out on so much because of when I was born :( and how come no one can afford basic shit anymore? I don’t wanna have no money at all! I really would like to be happy in the future but with all the bullshit caused by social media and the lack of money it seems bleak. I’m sorry that this is such a negative ask but I am not doing so hot and was hoping you’d have an insight ? Don’t respond if you don’t wanna
Hey ya there sprout 🌱 it can be really tough out there!
Your feelings are valid, so valid in fact that those exact feelings are why Solarpunk as it currently exists is around! We've all been there!
Between the wages of the top 10% of ppl vs everyone else being greater then during the French revolution, the average citizen globally being worse off then when the great depression was happening, climate crisis after crisis, all while consuming endless bits of info both horrifying (ex Politics) and hopeful (ex Social Media activism) it's waaaay too much for anyone to bare alone! Much less constantly! That burden shouldn't be on any of us!! But since it is, I'm here to help at least lighten the load even if temporary.
The best thing to do when we feel like this is to stop. Find 5 minutes to be still. We are fight/flight/fawn creatures and we will only loop in our solutions without actual clear choices if we don't Chill Out. We're mammals our natural state is Chilling Out and Play.
Next, think about how cool the planet is and particularly how cool humans are?
How there's finger flutes on ceilings thousands of years old, smaller then average indicating that parents held their children up to draw on the ceilings.
Tumblr media
Think about the invention of looms and spinning fibers! What other creature could do that? Think about the kids that could build Snowmans without aching fingers because of lovingly knit mittens.
Tumblr media
We sing like whales do, like birds do, like wolves do, and we do it to share stories and ideas over food! It is the first things babies mimic! We have songs so old we no longer know their origin just that they came from love! We even have songs to herd cattle meaning music transcends just us but bleeds into our relationships with the planet!
That we have play behavior! Just like wolves and foxes and whales and octopus it is so built into our DNA to play its generally how we learn things! This ranges from agriculture (children tossing seeds around, blowing on dandelions!) To chores (parachute games > folding laundry, playing pretend > usually chores/job based) to hunting (tag! Hide and seek!)
Think about our interconnectiveness with the planet too, how we are guided by Honey guides to find abandoned hives to share in the spoils of bread and honey. How Sweetgrass needs us to flourish, how berries and nuts need us to spread across the land, how we fix other animals broken bones and beaks and help them return home when otherwise they wouldn't ever get home.
Now that you can remember we deserve to be here, that you deserve to be here. We can look at the current situation and bare it.
And we do that by doing small things. Jam out and listen to music while picking up litter on your block, go to a library and just hang out or research something you love, make seed Bombs and toss them I to abandoned lots, make silly cartoons. Whatever it is, it will be enough.
The weight of the world isn't ment for the individual no matter how much Capitalism and Elites will try and guilt you over their failures. That weight is ment for collective groups, but your job as a Person is to be happy where you can and to be kind so others can be happy. The last thing that I always keep in my heart is a quote from my fave author Ursula Le Guin:
Tumblr media
Hang in there, a brighter tomorrow is gunna happen. I promise 🌻
25 notes · View notes
lover-of-mine · 2 days
Note
On the question of the new viewers. Let me preface with after getting burned bad I made a promise I would never ship Canon straight characters as queer ships ever again. It just comes into play to understand the readers digest version of this. Yes I was always aware of the Buddie ship and the actors but that was it
I accidentally started season 6. It just came on, and I just didnt look away. Here's how it went.
I actually saw the lasagna dinner scene and thought wait they went Canon? That's them right? Then quickly realized. Nope 2 straight besties. Bucks a cool uncle (didn't know about will scene forgive me). And proceeded to not get attached.
Actually easy because they separated them a bit. But then there was the lightening strike and poker date and I was like oh somethings happening. I was wrong they had the dopey ass ending and I was like bless me for not getting invested.
Then.... It was a year wait!!!!!! So it was a boredom tune back in. I was pleased to see Bucks bi story. I thought the first kiss was charming. Then he was just there. I left the season thinking Eddie was tragically in love with his dead wife and Buck was experimenting.
If I didn't go back to binge I would have gone into 8 with these expectations. Eddie either excepting he was a tragic single father forever. Buck, yes probably seeing Tommy, but no I was not a shipper. Firstly because of appearance. I have no problem with age difference but with them I just don't like it. Tommy seems older and rougher. On the flip side personality. That Tommy wasn't what I pictured Bucks end game as like at all. I wanted someone like Spencer Reid if it wasn't Eddie.
But... . I did go back and binge. S1 was a trip. Got to S2. Saw the opening. Went duh I get why they ship them, but you ain't getting me. Until the elf scene. I really was good. But right after the elf scene I remembered hearing how Tim wrote it as a nod and double checked.. Remember, it would be weird to see the scene and know Tim knows after knowing full well yes Buck would come out queer. So it really was a no brainer after that. No way Tim created this in S2 if they weren't end game if there was ever a chance.
Then came the well, tsunami, shooting, will reveal, break ups, co dependant idiots and finally caught back to the lasagna and lightening. Also seeing how much Eddie isn't a reliable narrator about his relationship with Shannon. The version I got at the end of 7 is not what was happening on my screen in 2. I would almost label it a red herring depending on how this plays out in 8. Also after watching the begin episodes I understood anyone's frustration that Tommy was just white washed.
Final conclusion. Not even trying to sound condescending but I don't know why the other side even thinks this is a "ship war". I was late and I never hated Tommy but I would have never shipped them as end game. I couldn't even tell if Tommy actually liked Buck. I was left with the ick of Buck was a consolation prize or second choice and Buck was trying way to hard. Taking scraps and being grateful. Maybe because I binged it was more fresh but it was more of how little self respect Buck had for himself in trying to be in a relationship.
And if anyone finished reading that you deserve an award.
This is an interesting view of things, I think if you only have the s7 context, you will see them differently because the whole Kim thing really messes with the perception of Eddie and love, thank you for coming and telling me this, really.
But this kinda made me talk about my experience with buddie, so I'm gonna do that, because I think it's funny. I didn't know much about the show, but I knew of buddie, I started watching during the hiatus between 5a and 5b and during that time there was some big talk about queerbaiting going around and I know of them next to ships like destiel and stucky and destiel, I had just read an article on queerbaiting that had a section talking about them, so I kinda assumed buddie would be the same as they had enough context to create a ship but not enough for it to have a real chance of going canon, so I was set on not shipping them. Like, I was legit ready to roll my eyes and see that Buck and Eddie with their respective female love interests and be like "okay they are never going anywhere" but then an elf pretty much calls them gay as Eddie justifies sleeping with his wife 10 episodes in and I was like "oh oh" because they have a compelling friendship and I'm a sucker for best friends to lovers, but I was fighting it, until the tsunami, because seriously, I watched Eddie go "there's nobody in this world I trust with my son more than you" after a situation where no one would blame Eddie if he needed time and I was done for. Then they just kept getting more insane about each other. I remember watching the will reveal and being like "wait, fuck me, are they gonna go there?" because they follow all the basic procedural slowburn tropes, and I started s5 being like 👀 about everything that was happening to them. Now that Buck is bi, I'm seriously 95% sure buddie is happening because all the elements are there. There is something very compelling about Buck and Eddie together when you look at the whole show and s7 really added to that. Settling for Buck in a relationship with someone who's clearly not that into him just because it's a queer relationship doesn't feel right when Eddie is right there.
26 notes · View notes
howtotrainabraincell · 21 hours
Note
I was curious if you had any head canons pertaining to Malik Al-Sayf and him as a person? Let's forget that he is an assassin for a second and focus on him as an individual. Like is he comfortable with the loss of his left arm or is he embarrassed by it? What sparked his interest in maps and making them? Why was he so close with Kadar his baby brother? The more humanizing elements.
INDEED, I DO HAVE HEADCANNONS ABOUT THE DAI OF JERUSALEM! Ahem... But fr tho I do have a lot of head cannons about Malik as a person.
I don't know why...but he gives major "I'm abusive and angry toward the idiot novice but I'm actually really sweet" vibes. I think he's a total sweetie bear behind constantly humbling Altair lol
I think we ALL know that Altair's redemption arc wouldn't have been the same without Malik's verbal bashings and occasional scroll throwing.
About the loss of his left arm...
He was angry at first. Very angry. He had plans of how he wanted to help the Brotherhood and further their cause he so believes in, and then suddenly it was all taken away. He was told that he could no longer be in the field lest he be unnecessarily slain and then sent to Jerusalem. (This winds up fueling his spite and he became obsessed with mastering one armed swordsmanship...to the point where he could put two armed Altair on his ass lol)
Now he did go of his own free will, but he knew they put him in charge to soothe any battered ego he had. The man felt that it was a form of pity and emotional smothering. He had felt that Al Mualim had "requested" him to depart from Masyaf as a way to keep him from killing Altair... because he wanted to. He had felt...betrayed by what he believed in after it took so much from him and then it just swept him to the side like an old sandal. But being away and trying to focus on his responsibilities helped. Being alone also gave him time to cool down from his anger and focus on mourning his baby brother which he needed a lot of time to do.
He's not necessarily embarrassed by losing his arm, but he does feel inconvenienced by it from time to time. Forgetting that he no longer has a left hand to multitask and reach for things with. He was mad when he discovered that he couldn't carry as many books as he used to be able to, but he's smart so he found ways to get by (one of them including making a certain novice carry them lest he refuse and get bonked on his hooded coconut)
Malik can handle himself and you just KNOW that he mastered his f- you glare by giving the death stare to anyone who looked for too long ahaha. He does not appreciate staring AT ALL. He has eyes to make eye contact with hello. He also gets tired of explaining his sudden missing limb and of people expressing sympathy at the beginning because it just refreshes everything - plus he's Malik Al-Sayf OKAY he doesn't need BOTH ARMS to be a BADASSARINO.
He also feels vulnerable from time to time, and he doesn't like that one bit. He already lives a high alert lifestyle so losing his arm put him on peak "don't touch me or I won't hesitate" mode. The vulnerability wore on him for a while but eventually he became confident enough in his skills to protect himself again and his love helped too.
Though in a way he does appreciate the new awareness that losing his arm has brought him. It made him more reactions quicker and he became more responsive - such as a catching a falling book in the blink of an eye or blocking the cat from bapping his quill in the inkwell and knocking it over lol. (He has a cat in there with him and you CAN'T TELL ME OTHERWISE)
As for his interest in maps and making them...
We know that Malik was jealous of the way that Altair from a young age was "the favorite" of Al Mualim - so we can assume that he does in fact feel jealousy and it affects him on different levels. Whether it consists of the manifestation of saltiness toward the one he's jealous of, or it results in him learning a new skill. SO -
Malik was jealous of the eagles. Yes, the bird. He was always jealous of how they could fly so high up into the sky and see everything, everywhere, far and wide from multiple angles, and it made him wonder if such a thing was possible for him. When he could, he loved climbing up to high places - not to perform the Leap of Faith - to see the view from above. He loved it. And it made him think about other ways he could see everything from different perspectives.
Then he discovered Cartography. Needless to say, he was ecstatic lol. Map making for him was the perfect way to achieve what he wanted. He could have an Eagle Eye view of a large area from multiple perspectives and see everything just like he wanted. He could even make multiple versions of it from different angles! He could make a map of Masyaf from his POV in the mountains OR from the top of the Bureau.
I also think that him being so into cartography is a bit of a traumatic response. If he has a map and he knows the place intimately or can study it to see what it holds, he feels better about sending someone there or going himself. He didn't know what the Temple of Solomon held that day...and if he had he would have made Kadar stay home.
I even have a head cannon that Malik makes multiple versions of maps not just from different perspectives and to have backup copies, but to troll people haha. You telling me that this man wouldn't make a fake as hell map to fool Templars in case they stole them? I just KNOW he gave Altair multiple maps and told him to keep the true one on his person so if the enemy was successful in snatching the maps they'd get BAMBOOZLED ACK-
Finally, you wanted to know why I think he was so close with his baby brother Kadar...
I believe that he was so close with his baby brother Kadar because he's a family man, he's loyal, and he loves hard. They didn't really have their parents growing up so more oft than not he felt alone in the world. But no matter how alone he felt Kadar was always there for him, whether it was annoying him, joking with him, or just sitting with him. He fell into the role of big brother easily and got used to being the protective provider. Without Kadar he no longer had someone to care and look out for and Malik didn't know what to do with himself besides bury himself in his work.
It felt like a knife to heart when he lost the only family he had ever truly had because he knew that the Brotherhood was merely a figment of family - not the true family that he wanted. He had always dreamed of Kadar and him having their own families and bringing them both together to be one big happy family. But when Kadar was killed the reality of that dream never coming true...hit him hard.
Malik was also incredibly angry by the slaughtering of his brother Kadar because he was so young. He had so much potential and so much life to live - and it was taken like it had never even existed. He had imagined teasing Kadar about falling in love when the time came, the pride he would feel watching his baby brother one day become a Master Assassin as he had always dreamed of, the happiness he would feel on behalf of his little brother when he became a father. He had imagined what it would've been like to grow old and have Kadar crack jokes about aching bones and greying hair. Malik had imagined watching his little brother grow up the same way parents would anticipate watching their child grow.
Now, for the rest of his life he'll be tortured by "what ifs" and possibilities that will never happen. Malik felt robbed of the one true gift he had ever received in his life - especially as most people in his position don't get what he had. Family.
15 notes · View notes
mpregandproud · 2 days
Text
Isaac II (Part 10)
Tumblr media
Time is flying by. It's been 5 years since my last delivery and Isaac and I have talked a lot about our life plan. While we have always dreamed of having a huge family, and we really have, we haven't had any more children since Andrew, Adrian, Jon and Michael were born.
And it's not because we didn't try, because shortly after Sandra, Cal, Patrick and Isaac became parents, we were overcome with an immense sense of fatherhood. But apparently men, just like women, have a time in our lives when we stop being fertile. As there are still not so many men with the capacity to get pregnant, there is not much information about it. But after three years of trying and failing to get pregnant, considering our history, our doctor told us that we are going through male menopause, andropause he called it.
I did not take the news well, although in the end, at 53 years of age, it was more than expected. If after giving birth to the quadruplets I was unable to regain the shape I had before giving birth, after the news this was mission impossible. I drowned in food the anxiety I felt knowing that I would never again be able to generate life.
Tumblr media
You'll say I'm an idiot. After giving birth to 21 babies in two decades, and expanding the family with grandchildren, who would want to have more children. Really, anyone you tell that we wanted to experience pregnancy one more time would think we were crazy. It took me months to understand what the people around me were thinking, but it's complicated for someone who has built so much of his life these past few years around her pregnancies, this new scenario was complicated.
The good thing is that I had Isaac and the kids by my side at all times. My sister and my friends Lucas and Adam were a great help in understanding that I had to enter a new stage in my life, the grandfather stage. I already had six grandchildren, the children of Sandra and Cal and Patrick and Isaac, wonderful, beautiful children. Although I was still raising my youngest children, the prospect of more grandchildren filled me with excitement.
Dylan, Nate, Philip, Edward and Cristina, now out of college and working, introduced us to their various partners. Dylan had met Jessica, a beautiful girl who was Miss of her country, I can't remember where is she from. Cristina had Veronica as a girlfriend, and apparently they don't want to have children, they say they prefer to be the cool aunts. Edward is very reserved, but from time to time he let slip the name of a girl named Pamela. Philip was dating Peter, coach of the local soccer team and son of my friend Frank, whom I never imagined as part of my family. Nate, on the other hand, has inherited my husband's gift for flirting, so every now and then he would come home with a guy or girl he had just met and with whom he was already planning his life forever.
Sandra and Cal are still happily in love. They have decided to continue with Cal's parents' business, and not to resume their studies. Little Samba is the most handsome boy in the world, no wonder, having the parents he has. They got married a year after becoming parents, in a small ceremony with their immediate family and little else. They wanted an intimate celebration to celebrate their love with those closest to them.
Bruce, Ken, Charlotte, Ivana and Jason have started their college experience this year. This is not the case of Patrick, who decided to stop for a year to be able to raise his children with more attention during the first months. He and Isaac combine their studies with part-time jobs from Monday to Friday and full-time on weekends. Both have made their first steps as photographic models. As their parents we helped them as much as possible, although we were surprised by how clear their ideas about their life as a couple were. They lived in a small house that allowed them to live comfortably, but without too many expenses, in order to save and be able to progress later on. Two teenagers were giving a life lesson to four grown adults.
A few weeks ago, on the birthday of their sons Anton, Ian, Benji, Liam and Zach announced to us that they wanted to get married. They had been living together for a long time and deeply in love, so I guess it was the inevitable step in their lives. I cried like a little girl when Patrick told Isaac and I that he was getting married. In addition to the excitement of seeing a son get married, there was also the emotion of seeing myself very much reflected in the story of these two boys who, at just 20 years old, were living intensely the life they wanted.
Tumblr media
Two months after the announcement, the big day arrived. Little by little the guests arrived at the venue. All our children and their respective partners, nieces and nephews, friends, some teachers, colleagues from work and sports teams… the room was filling up waiting for the two lovers. Sandra attracted many stares, especially from those who did not yet know that she was pregnant again.
Tumblr media
While keeping an eye on our youngest children, I ran into Lucas and Adam, both impeccably dressed in gray. It seemed unbelievable that these two men my own age had this physique, with no exercise according to bastard Lucas, and I look like I'm eight months pregnant. It doesn't help that I've given birth to a good portion of the guests at this ceremony. And it also doesn't help that my husband has insisted on keeping me fat because it makes him so horny.
After a few minutes Isaac arrived accompanied by his brother, Dan. The groom looked gorgeous in his navy blue suit, bow tie and a flower in his lapel. You could see him standing there looking so handsome and nervous waiting for Patrick to arrive. When he walked up the aisle he didn't talk to anyone, he was staring at the door of the venue, he was a bundle of nerves. Even with those nerves on edge we could see why he was dedicating himself to being a photo model. The boy was the spitting image of his father Lucas when he was young, the same Lucas I was madly in love with as a teenager.
Tumblr media
Five minutes later Patrick arrived accompanied by my husband Isaac. Isaac looked spectacular, and I was reassured to see that he had also put on weight in recent years, not as much as I had, but he was not as thin as when we first met. Although he has aged more than I have, he looked like a handsome mature Hollywood actor in his navy blue suit.
Our son stepped forward a bit when they arrived near the altar. The poor guy only had eyes for his future husband, Isaac. She walked briskly over to where he stood and took his hand, smiled at him and kissed him on the cheek.
“Hold my hand you too, I'm about to burst into tears from excitement,” Isaac whispered in my ear as he sat next to me in the front row. I pinched his cheek tenderly and gave him a peck on the mouth.
After a few minutes of speeches from friends and family, Dylan, our oldest son and the master of ceremonies, invited the grooms to dedicate their vows to each other. The first to speak was Isaac.
“Patrick, I can't believe we're here, on this day we've dreamed of so much. We've been dating for six years, but I think I remember being in love with you for as long as I can remember. You were the mischievous little boy with the charming smile that I always wanted to play with when my parents took me to your parents' house. As luck would have it, we connected and time brought us together in a way I never imagined we would with you. I think all of us gays are scared to take the step of starting a relationship with our best friend in high school, but I will never, ever regret kissing you at the end of the hallway on the second floor of high school. You have given me the five most beautiful children in the world and you have filled every second of my life with light. I want to share with you the rest of our lives, expand our family and the happiness we share. I love you,” Isaac said. The audience applauded and he, deeply in love, kissed Patrick.
“What can I say now?” began Patrick, which was followed by some complicit laughter from the audience. “The gift of gab has never been my strong suit, but I've been writing down what to say now for weeks. I come from a huge family and grew up watching both my parents love each other deeply. I don't think I was ever aware of how much I wanted to build something that looked even the slightest bit like what the two of them had built. From a young age I knew I was gay, and I don't know why I thought that because of that very fact I wouldn't have the ease of having children that my brothers did. But then you came into my life. The boy I have been in love with since I was 5 years old. Our love was complicated, for some people we are like cousins and for others even brothers, but for me you have always been my best friend, the father of my children and the man with whom I share every moment of my life. You kissed me that fall day in high school, and my life changed forever, everything made sense. Since that moment I have wanted to share every moment with you. My friends and siblings know that I am not able to have a conversation, no matter what the topic, without mentioning you 20 times a minute, you complement me and you have made me grow personally and emotionally. Can I ask for more? I don't think so. I can't wait to put the ring on your finger and make official in the eyes of the law what has been official in our hearts and family for six years now. It will be the first step in the rest of our wonderful lives. I want you to join me on this journey. I love you, Isaac,” Patrick finished, planting a kiss right there for Isaac.
Dylan uttered the relevant questions and they both responded with a resounding “yes”, to which our eldest son told them “you can kiss the groom, or should I say husband”. The two melted into one, kissing passionately. The guests were clapping and throwing petals and rice at them. Lucas, Adam, Isaac and I were in the front row, four 55-year-old men crying like babies watching our sons united in marriage and sharing their happiness with everyone.
Tumblr media
The bride and groom went on a honeymoon in the Caribbean, and when they returned they told us that in a few weeks they would be moving to the big city because of a job offer they had both received. A modeling agency had noticed their wedding photos and wanted to sign them, for which they had to move to the city, where they would find the best job opportunities.
Since their departure we spoke to them very little, as they had an impossible schedule of photo shoots, catwalks and interviews. A year after their wedding, taking advantage of the fact that Lucas and Adam were with us at home, we made a video call with them. They looked overjoyed, deeply happy with their life together. They told us how they were balancing parenting their five children with a career as demanding as modeling.
“Dads, we have something to tell you, that's why we called you”, Isaac said on the other side of the screen. “We found out a few weeks ago and we wanted you to be the first to know. Isaac and I are going to be dads again, we're pregnant", said Patrick.
Tumblr media
The end of Isaac II
This story will continue…
15 notes · View notes
herd-reject-arts · 1 year
Text
So I'm leaving work and something darts in front of me, maybe 10ft away, too fast for me to see what it is. Peek around the tree blocking my path and I see this
Tumblr media
Just like... a whole ass hawk. Dude's gotta be about 1.5ft tall. Massive fucking bird. And it's just staring me straight in my soul like this, even as I try to move ahead. It didn't budge. And there's only this path back to my car unless I want to walk on a busy highway. So I have the option of Death By Raptor or Death By Truck.
So I walk in the poison ivy filled patch off the sidewalk. Guy still isn't moving. Still staring me directly in the eyes. And I do this thing when animals are behaving strangely where I'll talk to them, so I'm just like, "Hey, man. I don't know you. You don't know me. This feels really threatening. I'm just trying to get to my car, dude. Can I get some space please? You're a big fucking bird. I see those claws. You could kill me right now, but I'd appreciate if you didn't, ok?"
It didn't move until I was about 2ft away. Again: I'm as far from it as I can be without walking into the street. It clearly wasn't going to budge. I walk past, thing flies up (silent, btw. Scary) and lands on a brick wall a little further ahead
Tumblr media
Anyway. Weird guy. Nearly shit my pants when I noticed a bird big enough to carry off a fully grown cat was just... there, staring me in the face, unwilling to move away from me, a human, something it should see as a threat. I watched behind me the whole rest of the way to my car, just in case this bird decided to help me shed this mortal coil. 10/10 experience. Super cool guy.
28K notes · View notes
webbed-menace · 2 years
Text
some thoughts about the rt/ah and kdin situation below. mostly very selfish thoughts of mine. I just had to word vomit it out i guess bc
i don't even know how to consolidate my thoughts into something coherent abt all this. like i'm just really sad, upset, frustrated? probably other emotions that I'm having a hard time articulating too. The stuff with Matt was disappointing but knowing he was still working part time felt like it wasn't the end of the world. The stuff with Kdin tho feels like being stabbed in the back. I knew stuff wasn't ideal after what Mica had to say a few years ago but I didn't realise how deep this went into the actual company and not just primarily having a bad community.
like rt/ah is something that shaped me and influenced me a lot as a teen. i've been a fan for like over a decade at this point and that content really helped me through a lot, its been comfort viewing for a long time so it's hard to accept it all.
I know this is selfish but I like to believe in people - that they can and do change, and I feel like holding on to that is the only thing that's gonna keep me from spiraling at the moment. i have to believe that the people implicated in Kdin's post are capable of change and have been able to improve since then. Otherwise I'm gonna fall into a depression pit about all the money and time I've wasted on these people. But as much as I want them to be good people now, I know there's also a good chance it isn't the case. I just personally need time before I can fully accept it I guess
1 note · View note
project-sekai-facts · 3 months
Note
I've seen many people stating that Airi is implied as transfem, and many saying it's merely a headcanon, but I haven't been able to find evidence to support either side as I have no idea of where that notion comes from. Do you know about any event/card stories or symbolism that could imply that she's transgender? Thanks in advance.
oooh this is a really interesting one for me actually! so straight off the bat, no airi is not canonically or implied trans. that said, a queer (in her case, trans specifically) reading of her story is totally valid, much like Toya's backstory for an in-game example, and for out of game examples stuff like Rin in Love Live! School Idol Project or Gwen in the Spider-Verse movies (these two support a trans reading, whilst Toya's story supports a more general queer reading).
I think the main cause of the reading comes from her fes story! While her childhood is first talked about in the first chapter of RE:START From Here!, it's very brief and the specific parts about her personality and presentation aren't much of the focus, aside from an incredibly short interaction between Airi and her mother where Airi thinks the idol on TV is cute and her mother tells her that there's nothing stopping her from being like that, then a similar interaction with her younger sister where she decides that she wants to be an idol.
What we learn from this is that Airi used to be a tomboy when she was younger, and was short tempered and aggressive, and often got into fights with boys (though in the interaction we are shown she does this to defend her little sister). She also discovered idols and decided she wanted to be one too, just as cute as the one on TV, which is the total opposite to how she was then. In terms of Airi's backstory serving as a trans allegory? I think you could get something out of this, though the allegory (intentional or not) is far more pronounced in her fes story. You could definitely view this flashback as her starting to realise she's a trans girl, and that she wants to be more girly. Especially when her sister says that Airi's just like the idol on TV, and she has a moment of realisation that she wants to be one too.
Tumblr media
Now onto her fes story. First I'll just mention a little fandom thing. So back in 2021 when Airi's fes card was initially released, a fan translation (pictured) was posted to youtube that mistranslated her as being transgender. It was a error made by the translator where instead of saying how the boys she fought with called her a "too cute for a monster", she said they called her a "too cute for a boy". The translation was deleted a long time ago, but for some reason people still bring it up, even now. I think this is where a lot of misinterpretation over her being canonically trans comes from.
Now onto the actual fes story. In the first part of the story, Airi looks back on the interactions with her sister that we saw in Re:start, thinks that she'd love to see the look on her younger self's face if she could see herself now, which creates her fragment sekai. In the second part, after talking with her younger self for a bit, she calls little Airi a tomboy, and she's visibly uncomfortable with this. Present-day Airi then realises this past version of her must be from around the time she started to be bothered by how people viewed her as "rambunctious" or a tomboy. She also mentions that when she decided to become an idol she started ignoring boys teasing her about it, confirming that her tomboy personality and presentation was a source of mockery.
Tumblr media
The most interesting part is that Airi says when she started wearing cute and girly clothing to school, she was mocked for it. Although the text explicitly states that for Airi, she was a GNC girl who was uncomfortable with her presentation and wanted to be more girly, this is literally something that has happened with Mizuki, who is all-but-stated canonically transfem. The rest of the story is Airi explaining what being an idol is like and her experiences to her younger self, who then proudly proclaims that she's going to become an idol.
As I said, the text explicitly states that she's a tomboyish girl before she decided she wanted to become an idol and wear cute clothes, which strongly suggests that she's cisgender (of course, she could be a GNC trans girl who came out when she was very young, but this is not canon). However, the fes story overall, and particularly the 3 lines of dialogue pictured above, strongly support a trans reading.
Airi was teased for wearing cute clothes, and while the text doesn't state it outright, you shouldn't have to be told that these were typically girly or feminine clothes, especially given the tshirt and dungarees that Airi wears on her child L2D model. As stated earlier, this exact same thing has happened with Mizuki, although the reactions from classmates and the girls themselves were slightly different on the account of Mizuki being canonically transgender. Airi is annoyed that her classmates think the cute clothes clash with her personality and make fun of her for it, but in Mizuki's case she questions if it's okay for her to wear such clothes because people think it's weird for her to be wearing it (the reason for it being weird is left unstated, but it's presumably because her classmates knew her as a boy at this point in time). Nonetheless, this mirrors the experiences of so many trans people in real life, who are mocked by the general public due to not fitting into the box of gender norms dictated by society.
Airi affirming that she's a girl is definitely the standout line here, though. It shows us how insecure little Airi was with her presentation, and how she wanted people to think of her as a proper, cute girl, instead of a "monster". So while Airi is not canonically trans, the text strongly supports her being read as such. It doesn't take a genius to work out how you could apply Airi growing up as a more masculine tomboy, then realising she wants to be a cute idol, then being teased for dressing in a traditionally feminine way is an allegory for a trans experience, intended or not.
Tumblr media
Also absolutely not solid evidence of anything at all, but I often see people point out that Airi's trained The Strongest Idol Smile! 4* has a trans flag color palette, something we've seen in Mizuki cards before. However this is very likely unintentional and just done for artistic effect, the pink ribbons on the card are actually red on the costume (and you can tell in some parts of this artwork too). Still think it's a neat end to this post though.
122 notes · View notes
Text
Starlo should be Clover's dad
Why? Because ↓
1) Both dress into cowboy-themed attire to feel braver/more important than they are
Tumblr media
2) Clover, instead of a regular kid, wants to feel like a hero; Star, instead of a regular farmer, also wants to feel like a hero
In reality, Star is not the tough guy he pretends to be. His optimism, protectiveness and caring nature make him a hero though.
In reality, Clover started off as a scared kid who became more confident and skilled thanks to Flowey's resets. Their heroism comes from their forgiving and selfless nature and the hidden courage they got the chance to explore.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
2) Both acted childish during a dangerous situation Clover came down the mountain with a toy gun so that it would bring them comfort/they'd feel more in control of the situation (if you remember, Frisk refused to play with Asriel's toys in UT, saying how they're "too old," and I assume Frisk and Clover are the same age).
Tumblr media
Starlo brought a fake gun before confronting Clover in genocide, just to feel cool.
Tumblr media
3) Both not only value justice, but base it on compassion
Clover's entire mission was to bring justice (avenge the kids), but along the way changed that mindset (in pacifist). Star says how him and his posse aren't bandits, tests Clover's sense of justice and morality with the trolley problem, and wants to give Ceroba a second chance despite her actions.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
4) Starlo's got protective fatherly instincts
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
5) fatherly pride
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
8) a lot of monsters associate Clover with the Dunes/Wild East
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
9) oh and... Starlo referred to the Wild East as Clover's.... home. Twice.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
he could have easily said 'Wild East'
... get the adoption papers.
142 notes · View notes
sleepyseals · 4 months
Text
Tumblr media
[Image Description: A digital painting of a Lego Bionicle Rahkshi facing left and stooped over as if tracking its prey along the ground. The background is black with a bright green vertical shape to contrast the character in front. The Rahkshi is holding its spear in its right limb, propping its body up with it as it holds its face close to the ground. It is rendered as a black metallic material with red eyes. Its hunched shape and angular spines stand out harshly against the green background. End Image Description.]
I got a rahkshi recently and wanted to draw it so here's this - kind of an experiment with studying a real life object and how to pose it into a interesting composition and then replicating the lighting I got tired of rendering this partway through however :P
77 notes · View notes
silusvesuius · 21 days
Text
n*loth not being able to bag anyone over the (human term) age of 25-30 at most is the only logical and real conclusion to me because it can be just explained away as him wanting to prove and control everything and anyone (Cus he's a man!) but being stuck in that demographic because his unbearable and vile personality is a force that nobody can look past once they've outgrown the possible fear and idolization period of anyone but also n*loth in particular.
#text#i think even younger ones that possess the same nasty traits can be slammed back 'In their place' (in his mind) by him just bc his -#- abilities and power alone (alt. name the factors that make him 'Cool') that dumbs them down insanely in comparison#maybe by this i mean like; ild*ri. despite the animosity she could still feel very foolish and is conscious of her wuss-ness#if that makes sense#cause no matter the disrespect anyone might have for an older capable person the reality is still reality#tbh i just think he doesn't like to sweat it much and still aims for the younger ones bc it's easier than it would be for someone that's -#- 30+ years old#and once he's proven his point he doesn't find any merit in sticking with older ones cause their interests or anything they offer -#- don't matter to or interest Him personally#i think an older demographic is just more boring to him and he would rather spend his time being metaphorically sucked off for his greats -#- by someone that already finds themselves 'lesser' than him and always will for a long time#than someone that is defiant of that fact#basically the more power imbalance the better#in his mind there will always be one unless he certainly knows someone is his equal (or better than him) but he likes the add-on of an -#- age difference too#keeps it in a safe zone with less problems for him#sorry for spitting again my brain just started machine-gunning thoughts for no reason#also i said before that he's an innocence fan. might not be a total puritan but there's something there#it's kinda like him not wanting to be with a dusty ''OLD'' person that's seen a lot anyway#i'm like barely able to hold myself back from opening my mouth to mention t*lvas where i'm making a point about n*loth's brain where he -#- isn't even needed to prove it#but like#him voicing dislike of n*loth general nauseating character and actions but still sucking up to him while n*loth can probably feel -#- that dislike anyway is cute to me i like to view it as an object being thrown into the wall over and over#where n*loth is proving his own worth to other people by drilling their brains out with proof. not that he needs to#but he would like that to be perfected a 100%#and t*lvas is capable of being molded into that state ....... probably#silusvesuisuis you didnot just confess to wanting to see t*lvas be slammed into a wall you fucked up demented beast you're sick#actually can't believe i forgot to mention this but he's literally so immature idk what he has anything in common with actual mature people
28 notes · View notes
justewil · 3 hours
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
i might be wrong (i probably am since this is just google translated) but it Seems like coindar gives hints to where coins are instead of showing you like in the past games which is. really cool to me i like that a lot!!!
19 notes · View notes