#but i choose to be a kinnie instead

[loser-vxbez]

Hi! Can i request bllk boys type in girls head anon? Character could be anyone. Feel free to ignore this if you don't have time to make it! Have a nice day/night! 🫶🏼

ill just choose some of my favs then but thx for the req<3

Nagi Seishiro

★ Nagi seems like someone who would like patient girls (patient ppl like reo)

★Seeing how he's an introvert he would probably be more into an extrovert or people who are chatty around their close ones (ifykyk)

★ Seeing how he's not used to people getting close to him (besides reo) He wouldn't mind (would love) if you're clingy. It gives him a sense of comfort

★Nagi can be a bit oblivious to things so he would like someone who is direct

★ He can also have a hard time processing feelings (in general) so he'd be touched if you were to show some sympathy and maybe help him out.

★He'd like an s/o who's love language was physical touch or quality time. (One of his fav things to do would be to play his game silence either with you sleeping, or watching him)

Nothing like enjoying silence w your s/o :)

Itoshi rin

★ Seeing how rin is REALLY introverted, quiet (and moon-coded) he'd like someone who is bubbly and sweet.

★ He also has A LOT of issues so he'd also like someone who is good at listening or comforting.

★ He doesn't talk alot in general so he'd like to listen to you rant about anything.

★ He tends to overwork himself, so he would like s/o that cares about his well-being. (He won't admit it<3)

★He'd also like someone who's love language is words of affection (he clearly needs it) because he's likely to get insecure in your relationship so he needs constant reassurance, otherwise it may lead to issues. "you deserve better" ಠ_ಠ

★ And man doesn't care about your looks, Ugly? Where🤨

Mikage Reo

★ MY KINNIE😍

★ Anyways- this man is all the five love languages combined

★ He'd probably love someone who thinks really deeply because he'd probably overthink a lot of things so seeing someone else overthink their love (in a good sense) makes him feel better (im sorry if this dont make sense)

★He'd also love someone that sees him more than his money and status (duhh)

★He'd love someone who's able to appreciate the simplicity of things (like if he gave you a paper ring instead of a diamind ring) ifykyk

★He would love receiving texts from you so he probably wouldn't be a big fan of dry texters (but he wouldn't love u less, if u were)

I gave up :(

Hope u enjoy <3

Have a nice day!

[actually-a-fish]

the best supernatural episodes

according to an autistic person with a special interest and the ability to make a list.

if youre really serious about supernatural spoilers then maybe stay away :)

None of the season one episodes made in on the list but I will give an honorable mention to S1 E2 Wendigo.

S2 E11 Playthings - A classic, creepy girls in a creepy hotel. Special call out to Sam getting SLOPPY

S2 E16 Roadkill - There's a ghost haunting the highway. the Boys help the spirit move on. This is an early example of monster empathy

S2 E18 Hollywood Babylon - Dean loves hollywood. I love dean. this episode makes me kick my feet like a little girl and i will not defend myself.

S2 EP 20 What Was Shall Never Be - all I have in my notes for this one is "Dean Djinn Dream" which was enough for me to remember the episode and get misty eyes. This is SEASON 2 my son will never know peace.

S3 E5 Bedtime Stories -I had to check the wiki on this one, I think i liked it cause it referenced classic fairytales

S3 Ep11 Mystery Spot - "HEAT OF THE MOMENT" RISE AND SHINE SAMMY!

S3 E13 Ghostfacers! - Im a Facer through and through

S3 E16 No Rest for the Wicked - S3 finale and the Boys are facing consequences! Classic Dean, Sam and Bobby episode.

S4 E1 Lazerus Rising - First Cas Episode. That handprint makes me feel things.

S4 E6 Yellow Fever - What if Dean had anxiety (The Eye of the Tiger blooper is also at the end of the episode which gives it bonus points.

S4 E17 Wishful Thinking - Make a wish? was it for your teddy bear to be diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder? Well thats what youre getting!

S4 E17 It's a Terrible Life - Sam ~ the sales rep. Dean ~ middle management.

S4 E18 The Monster at the End of the Book - There are books about Sam and Dean?! Written by this guy who loves self insert character? Surely the entire show isn't about to take a tone shift?

S5 E3 Free to be You and Me - Sam and Dean are fighting again, but this time Dean has a new heavenly boy toy to play with instead. (Cas has no rizz yet it's actually a little painful to watch)

S5 E5 Fallen Idol - Okay the Wax People episode is on here for one reason and one reason only. Paris Hilton.

S5 E7 The Curious Case of Dean Winchester - Old man Dean and old man Bobby. This is also the episode for HH Husk kinnies.

S5 E8 Changing Channels - Dr Sexy MD is that you?!

S5 E9 The Real Ghostbuster - *in a grizzly voice* "I'm Dean Winchester, this is my brother Sam. Have you experienced anything strange?" "Dude that was so good! Now we can go solve the puzzle" "Man you're breaking the immersion!"

S5 E10 Abandon All Hope - This is here for Crowley's first appearance and not because the end will make you cry.

S5 E12 Swap Meat - "uh... its Audi Nos". Freaky Friday starring Sam Winchester! An angsty teen and April Kepner from Grey/Sloan Memorial Hospital.

S5 E16 Dark Side of the Moon - The Boys lives flash before their eyes. Dean is pissed forever about Sams.

S5 E19 Hammer of the Gods - this is for all my pagans out there!

S6 E4 A Weekend at Bobby's - What do you think this episodes about idjit.

S6 E15 The French Mistake -  “For whatever reason, our life is a TV show.” “Why?” “I don't know.” “No, seriously. Why? Why would anybody want to watch our lives?” 

S7 E4 Defending your Life - consequences? for fucking people over? how about you stand trial.

S7 E20 The Girl with the Dungeons and Dragons Tattoo - The self insert character made for us :) Luv u 4ever Charlie XD

S8 E4 Bitten - found footage will always scare. this one reminds me that this show started as a psuedo horror.

S8 E8 hunteri heroci - Cas tries his hand at being a hunter

S8 E12 As Time Goes By - FINALLY THEY ARE CARVING TRAPS INTO BULLETS

S8 E17 Goodbye Stranger - verbatim here are my notes for this episode "Cas chooses Dean, but the way he handles Meg... Fuck Naomi"

S8 E18 Clip Show - If you only want to watch just one episode of Supernatural this should be it. It's not actually a clip show, theres a broment, bonding time with favorite characters and crazy plots that only supernatural could get away with.

S9 E5 Dog Dean Afternoon - Dean is finally a dog person

S9 E11 First Born - Another bro fight leads to shipping <3 SamxCas + DeanxCrowley <3

S9 E15 #thinman - the slender episode feat. GHOSTFACERS. You come away from this episode thinking "supernatural is so fucking gay why wont the boys kiss"

S9 E21 King of the Damned - my favorite crowley era change my mind. Also the way the Boys interrogate an angel is so funny

S10 E5 Fan Fiction - I would unironically fuck w a supernatural musical and if helluva/hazbin taught me anything the rest of you would too

S10 E6 Ask Jeeves - The Clue episode. (Pay attention to the improvised weapons Dean chooses. It brings me joy)

S10 E9 The Things we Left Behind - Cas is suffering a midlife crisis and his besties are there to help him repair his relationship with his daughter. Funnily enough, Crowley is also getting some family bonding in.

Okay, I'm all caught up on my list. Should I have stayed up late transcribing this with an 8am class tommarow?

Probably not but it did bring me great joy. Tell me your favorite episode! I'll continue to add to my list as I continue my rewatch :)

[cookiesandbiscuits]

Now Playing: Falling in Love

[Leviathan - Maybe, Just Maybe]

Pairing: Leviathan x GN!Reader

Genre: Fluff

Summary: Who would've thought Leviathan will find such connection with someone one day? Certainly not him.

A/N: Mmmmm the third installment is here!! ✧⁠◝⁠(⁠⁰⁠▿⁠⁰⁠)⁠◜⁠✧

Ngl, I kinda struggled writing this despite considering myself a Levi kinnie 😭

Special mentions to my moots who likes Levi, @cloudcountry, @officialdaydreamer00 and @amberheavendremurr. I hope you guys like this :D

Now Playing: Falling in Love playlist

MASTERLIST

"I'm afraid of the things in my brain,

But we can stay here and laugh away the fears."

Levi finds you odd.

Sure, you were strange for a human, but what he's weirded out the most was the fact that you've been hanging out with him a lot.

Not that it's a bad thing. In fact, he now surprisingly enjoys your presence compared to when you two first met.

He just finds it odd that out of the seven demons you were living with, you chose to stick with him. After all, he's not as cool as Lucifer, as charismatic as Asmo, as smart as Satan and Belphie, or as friendly as Beel. Heck, even Mammon has more social charm than he is, despite being a scumbag.

So why in the three worlds are you here, choosing him, instead of them?

Maybe you just find a weird otaku like him fascinating?

Yes, that's probably it, the voice in his head says. It's just a one-time fixation and your attention will soon divert to something else once you've scratched your curiosity.

.

.

.

"What?"

You gave him a confused look, the video game you were playing completely forgotten. He absent-mindedly asked the question while the two of you were in the middle of gaming.

"I- uh..."

He already asked, so he might as well...

"I-I'm just curious... I'm not as interesting as my brothers, and my interests can be hard to understand sometimes, so... why do you hang out with me so much?"

Silence filled the space between you, and every second of it filled him with dread.

"Levi."

Your soft voice broke the tense quietness.

"Y-yes?"

"Look at me... please?"

It took a while before he turned to look at you, although he still struggled to look you in the eyes.

"Levi, I don't think you're uninteresting compared to your brothers. In fact, you're far from it."

You reached out to take his hand, but not before looking back to him. When he didn't move, you took it as a sign and placed your hand on top of his. You continued.

"You are the most creative and passionate person I have ever met in my life. Sure, I may not understand the things that you're into sometimes, but I love hearing you talk about them. Because that means I get to know you more, even if just a little bit."

"...Y-you're just saying that to be nice, aren't you?"

Please, don't get my hopes up any longer if you don't really mean it.

You shook your head.

"Levi, I meant everything I said. So please believe me when I say that you are just as wonderful as your brothers. And even though you don't, I will be here to tell you how amazing you are," you say, gently squeezing his hand.

Finally, he took the courage to look you in the eyes, searching for any hints of insincerity. There were none.

And as he continued to stare, a new voice in his mind spoke.

Maybe, just maybe... he could believe you, even if just a little bit.

[punkeropercyjackson]

HM How do i put this.So people often think 'punk' and 'asshole' are synomyous and this causes problems when it comes to character interpretations(and irl too ofc but that's for a future post).Now i'm not saying you can't be punk and an asshole because that would be absolutely stupid and just incorrect but the latter does not make the former and you shouldn't force anyone to when they're not even if they're fictional since how you treat characters who're part of a group reflects how you think of the irl one

I'm gonna use the example that prompted this post:Spiderpunk aka Hobie Brown.Hobie is often characterized as mean-spirited and perverted because he's explicitly meant as the embodiment of black punks but the thing is,in the actual movie and og comics,Hobs is an incredibly sweet and gentle person and if you think i'm being ridicilous for saying that about the dude who kills fascists and runs his mouth all the time,consider that direct action is not an act of cruelty but kindness towards oppressed people by helping them have a safer world and that Hobie's only actually rude to authority figures and with everyone else he's just goofy.He's also pretty open with how much he loves his friends and always has their backs and i find it very odd how often he gets assumed to be an extremely sexual person when there were never even any under the radar adult jokes about or by him and the smoker headcanon for him is baseless too and pretty obviously only happens for sex appeal

And that's a general problem with both canonical and popularly headcanon punk characters-Most fandom members think punk is 1.Exclusively male and 2.Inherently made to make yourself attractive.There's nothing wrong with finding punk men super hot but there IS a lot wrong is assigning punkhood to them with that intention alone,especially often the characters are not only just EdgyTM but also straight up fascists(Hp and Marauders Flop Era 'kinnies',please touch grass)

This leads to defanging of punk female characters.Katara is a classic example and Zuko is a rich boy with weird biases he's very open about that didn't fade until adulthood while Katara is an eco-terrorist who reclaims girlhood for herself by being anti-traditionalist and feminine in her own way yet Zuko is always the punk of the Gaang in aus.Stephanie Brown and not a girl but Duke Thomas are a poor woman who grew up friendless and abused by her dad and had a drug addict mom so she became a vigilante at 14 to help people like her and is implied to be a metalhead and a black boy who grew up getting kicked out schools and in and out of foster homes and joined a gang of crime fighters respectively but Stephanie is called scene instead(cause pastel punks don't exist right /s)and Duke is turned a meek black boyloser stereotype so that Jason Todd can be the punk Batkid instead,which is certainly......a choice seeing as Under The Red Hood is basically about him doing freestyle death penalty and is not actively an activist even if he does enjoy helping people and does whenever he has the opportunity to by narrative.Very important sidenote is that Stephanie and Duke are often entierly erased from Batman fan content despite being Jason's Batgirl and Robin and i think you can guess why(that obviously the coolest Batkid has to be the fan favorite white boy /s x2)

And i feel the need to include this one due to my url and that is Percy Jackson.Percy is representation for audhd and dyslexic people who can never mask and got bullied and abused for it but remained kind against all world's cruelty and choose to help others since they wanted the world to be like that to them as a kid instead but they ALSO aren't a pussy about it so they openly stand up to corrupted people and refuse to be like them no matter how hard they try to get them to and they openly hate them for what they're like and they act like a parental figure to younger minorities.Their creator stated he never inteded Percy as being bisexual and has no interest in it but he also said he'd be happy and supportive of Percy being played by a poc one day and within the books Percy is extremely transfem-coded so obviously the fandom pops several blood vessels when literally any of this is aknowledged because they read the wrong books and wanted a white male power fantasy in ancient greek gays flavor

You can be super nice and punk because punk is a subculture,not an entire personality type.And i hate to break it to edgecases on here but being super mean to people without a justified reason because you think it's cool or finding irresistibly hot on others is one of the most normal things you can do

[thundercloudshipping]

Proselfshiptember Day 3: Sleep

Just a a little fic :>

Tagging

@selfshipdorito @iris-kinnie @sleebyeevee @huntinglove @starseverance @rosepetalmoon and @caesarsprincess ! (if you wanna be on the list or taken off it let me know!)

"Hey Amy are you alright? you don't look that well". Ash asked. And he was right, Amy's hair was all frizzled, she had bags under her eyes and didn't really talk that much during the day, she was sort of, staring off into space.

"Oh, yeah, I'm fine, i just…" Amy paused before continuing. "Ok I'll be honest, I may have pulled an all-nighter studying.'' She said sheepishly, her eyes some-what darting around the room before landing on a concerned Ash, who said nothing. choosing to instead princess-carry Amy up to their shared room and placing her on their bed.

"Wait, what are you doing?''

"I'm taking you to bed. You gotta get at least a little bit of sleep. Plus this way you get a free cuddle!"

Amy smiled softly, before falling asleep in Ash's arms and it was not long before Ash was fast asleep too. They were each other's favorite place.

[antiendovents]

It pisses me off that non traumagenic "systems" want to fake a disorder and still be in the same spaces as traumagenic systems. And to the endogenic systems who say they are non disordered you can't just cherry pick the parts of these disorders you want and throw away the rest that's just not how it works. Not to mention calling traumagenic systems traumascum and saying we have a "hate boner" for being "ableist" by asking you to stay out of our space and maybe not fake the disorder I deal with every day that's just fucking rude. What happened to roleplay? What happened to kinning? Can't you just say you're a kinnie, hop in a roleplay forum and get on with your life why does something have to be "wrong with you"

My disability is not your accessory.

I didn't ask for unending trauma and a life that will always be fractured by dissociative amnesia.

But I'm glad you got to choose to be your favorite character from your new favorite media.

yea. endos honestly should just roleplay instead of claiming to be a system and stealing our terms. you cannot choose to be a system just like how you cannot chose to be any other disorder.

[ceaseless-watchers-special-girl]

on knowing another

(longpost i’m so sorry guys it came to me in the shower)

There’s a vague undercurrent of a theme in the Penumbra Podcast about knowing another person. It’s subtle, but it pops up every so often. It’s shown in the way we get to know the characters, especially as we get an insight into their minds in season 3, but it’s also shown in their relationships with each other, and that’s what I want to explore a little bit more.

Peter Nureyev, as we get to know him.

In season 1, Nureyev waltzes into Juno’s life

"JUNO: out of nowhere on a beam of goddamn starlight"

in Juno’s own words, and we all see him as some incredible, untouchable, unbelievably sexy master thief who’s interested in Juno for some unknowable reason (maybe that’s the Juno kinnie speaking idk). We think he’s cool, we think he’s funny, we think he’s dangerous and we think we love him but really, we’re just interested in him. We don’t actually know him yet.

And then, we have Angel of Brahma. We see his past, from his own perspective. And that’s not how knowing another is supposed to happen, you’re not supposed to be thrust into it headfirst, but that’s what we get with Nureyev, and so one second we don’t know him, and the next, we know him better than anyone else, because we’ve seen that he isn’t perfect. Not because he was wrong to kill Mag, that’s a whole different debate, but because he was put in a difficult situation in which there was no right choice. It is impossible for any person to be perfect, and so it was impossible for us and for Juno to truly know Nureyev until we knew what made him flawed.

Diamond Hijikata

Let’s travel back in time a bit, to when Juno was with Diamond. We see Diamond Hijikata from Juno’s point of view, we know her the way Juno knew her, and it is impossible for us to know her any other way, because we only ever see her through Juno’s eyes. Juno thought Diamond was flawless. I might be projecting a little here, because I thought Diamond was flawless. Every time I listen to Embrace of Ice, I fall in love with the version of Diamond Hijikata in Juno’s head. Sometimes, she says things that don’t quite fit with that version, and I brush it off, because Diamond Hijikata is impeccable, perfect, and so even if she sounds a little condescending at times, even if she sounds like she sees Juno as a toy to play with, as a way to piss of her mother, I don’t believe it. I choose to trust her instead. Because I think I know her.

And then, we get the scene in the third part of Embrace of Ice.

“JUNO: I thought I knew who you were. DIAMOND: You do, doll. Nothing's changed. You've just... learned more.”

But everything’s changed. Diamond isn’t who I thought she was, who Juno thought she was. Her name was Diamond Hijikata, sure. She went to college. She had friends, mostly troublemakers. She liked protests, and standing up for things, and pissing off her mother. She didn’t like flaunting how privileged she was. And that paints a certain picture, doesn’t it? Of a girl who stands up for what she believes in, who uses her own privilege to help those who don’t have any, who refuses to let corrupt authority keep her down; and it’s hard not to fall in love with someone like that. But that’s not who Diamond Hijikata was.

Diamond Hijikata was bored and rebellious. Captain H says so, at the very start of Embrace of Ice.

“HIJIKATA: Doesn't believe a word of what she says when she gets like that. JUNO: I don't think so. When she gets on a tear, she's so…”

Juno doesn’t agree with her. Juno thinks Diamond thinks like he does, that she believes in what she fights for. But when those fights threaten her own life, her own privilege, she backs down, and we are struck with the ugly truth that Diamond doesn’t believe in what she fights for. She doesn’t actually want to help those who are disadvantaged. I’m not even sure she sees Juno as an equal. And the sad fact is, I don’t know who Diamond is anymore. Neither does Juno. And I don’t even know who to be mad at anymore. Diamond hasn’t broken my heart, because the Diamond I was in love with never existed anywhere except in my head. If I had to bet, I’d say Juno feels the same way. And so he doesn’t love Diamond anymore, he never did, but he doesn’t hate her either, because:

“JUNO: The older I get, the harder it is to blame someone for being the most honest version of themselves, no matter how ugly the truth is. I'll take it over a pretty lie every time.”

The thing is, Diamond isn’t a bad person. And you can hear that in her little monologue in Embrace of Ice part 3.

“DIAMOND: Because I’m not a bad person. I'm not.”

She’s right, in a sense. She didn’t really do anything wrong. She wasn’t in on her mother’s plans, she wasn’t trying to thwart Juno at every turn. All she knew was where the ballroom was. She even has a cute little story to go with it. It’s so human, so understandable. But it’s human in a way none of us expected of Diamond Hijikata, because she is not the version of her we have in our heads. If we really knew her, we wouldn’t have been surprised at her actions. So Diamond didn’t betray us, not really. She didn’t intentionally decieve Juno or intend to cause him harm. She just wasn’t who Juno thought she was. And that’s why her actions seems so surprising, why it feels like a betrayal: because we don’t know her. That’s why the thought of her hurts so much: because how are you supposed to mourn losing the person you loved if they never even existed in the first place?

(god, fuck, this whole essay began because I couldn’t stop thinking about Diamond Hijikata, she hurts me so much I can’t even decide how to feel about her. send help.)

Peter Nureyev again

We see inside Nureyev’s mind in season 3, and everyone jokes about how much of a mess he is, but the fact is we love him anyway. And we don’t love him despite it, we love him because of it, because loving another is knowing another and seeing their flaws and saying “I understand”. This ties into what Juno says to Vespa before the wedding:

“JUNO: …everyone thinks they know you, right? They make up a version of you in their heads, and if you don’t play the part right they start asking questions. Sometimes with words. VESPA: Sometimes with a look. I know. JUNO: Yeah. “What’s wrong,” “are you okay,” “you seem angry”... all that. But... I don’t know. One day I wasn’t playing the role the best and I could tell he just didn’t mind. Or... he’d already stretched the role out until it actually fit me. And I realized I’d already done the same thing for him.”

Juno knows Nureyev now. So far, he’s seen Nureyev switch between personas, seen Nureyev when he isn’t playing anyone, been inside his head, lived with him for a year and talked with him extensively about their relationship (I don’t remember any quotes for this one, but I’m pretty sure they mention it in season 3 at some point. Might be Shadows on the Ship?). He knows Nureyev, well enough that the version in his head fits Nureyev perfectly, and so Juno can be certain that the man he loves really is Peter Nureyev, and not a version of him, because he knows Peter Nureyev.

Slip Jackson

Little shift in perspective now, let’s stop focusing on Juno for a second. Slip Jackson, Nureyev’s ex, the guy who’s been driving the plot of the story for the past year or so despite being in a coma. He’s Nureyev’s first love, and he and Nureyev spend a lot of time toying with the idea of knowing each other. They knew each other when they were kids, about 10 years old, and they meet again 6 or 7 years later by chance. A lot has changed in that time — it might not seem like a lot to an adult, but kids develop rapidly, and don’t stop until about 25, so  they’ve both really changed since they saw each other last, and they’ll continue to change. They’re young, and still learning who they are (god, it feels so weird to write that when I’m not much older, but anyways).

And so when Nureyev learns that Slip still does drugs, he’s a little horrified, because he doesn’t understand how Slip could be willing to take that risk. Slip clearly hasn’t developed or matured in the way Nureyev thought he would, and the two of them realise that they don’t really know each other all that well. Slip asks if he’d like to try drugs, and Nureyev refuses, and that’s that for a while. But then they live together for a while, and Slip offers Nureyev a way off Brahma, and he tells him about his dream, about the drug he wants to make. And Nureyev, who’s just figured out that he has the biggest crush on this man, decides he wants to know him a little better.

“NUREYEV: I... would like to try one, I think. Is your offer still open? SLIP: I don't... that's really nice of you, but I don't want you to think you have to try it just to, um, make me feel better, so-- NUREYEV: It isn't to make you feel better. It's to know you, Slip. And I think I'm finding I'd like to know you quite well.”

(Alexa, what’s the most romantic way to tell your boyfriend you want to do drugs with him?)

Then they run away to Saraswati together, and Slip goes on all these secret outings which Nureyev can’t follow him on for a while. Nureyev is forced to trust Slip, to place his life in his hands, but they’re still getting to know each other, and unlike with Juno and Diamond, Nureyev is aware that the version of Slip in his head might not match up with the real Slip. So, he gets paranoid, and the entire mess with the poker game and the executives happens.

But after it, they have a talk. A good one. This is one of the things I love about Slip: he makes Nureyev talk about his feelings, and he’s really good at putting things into perspective. You see it in the latest episode, too, with how they talk about Mag. It’s not perfect, but it seems incredibly mature for someone his age (though, again, not sure how much authority I have on the age aspect of this).

“SLIP: A person can't just tell you who they are cuz we're all too complicated for that. I wouldn't know where to start, and even if I tried, I'd miss most of everything and maybe you'd think I was hiding those things from you, but it wouldn't be true. Too much of me is invisible to me because I'm around it all the time, every day. You can try to see the world from someone else's point of view, but at the end of the day... we're all just ourselves. We're stuck there. But just because I can't say it doesn't mean you can't know it. All I can do is be honest, minute to minute, day by day. I'm sorry I'm not the person you apparently thought I was -- but to be fair, I never said I was that person to begin with. Only you did. So... how about we make each other a promise? NUREYEV: A promise? Promise what? SLIP: A promise to be honest with each other. If we're honest, each of us can give the other the best shot at knowing us, you know? You can decide who Slip Jackson is, and... well. If he's worth your time.”

THIS. This is basically the point of this whole essay (it’s so much longer than I intended I’m so sorry). I start chewing on my own bone marrow every time I listen to this, because he’s so right.

Knowing someone isn’t knowing big things, like their name, or face, or random fun facts about their life. Those are things you pick up along the way. Knowing someone else isn’t knowing what their favourite colour is, it’s them telling you what their favourite colour is and you realising that it makes sense they would like that colour, that it fits in with the image of them in your head. Knowing someone isn’t knowing all their layers, their past, their future, though all those things are important in their own way. Knowing someone is understanding the essence of them, the soul underneath all those layers, the sense of self, of who they are which philosophers have been trying to define for centuries, which Peter Nureyev has been trying to erase from himself for decades.

Slip and Nureyev loved each other because they loved everything they knew about each other, and wanted to know more. Slip’s loss hits Nureyev like a bulldozer because he never really gets to know who Slip is — the chance is taken away from him, and Nureyev is convinced it’s all his fault. He’s determined to bring Slip back so he can finally know who Slip is, even though he’s trying to erase himself so there’s nothing left of himself to love back.

Peter Nureyev forever

And then, season 5. Yowzers.

“NUREYEV: You think you know me. The nameless thief. You presume, just because I've told you my real name and let you peruse a few carefully-curated passages of my life story, that you have access to a "real" me that nobody else does. Is that right? JUNO: This isn't gonna work, Nureyev. That journal was true. I know it was. NUREYEV: (LAUGHS) How could you possibly? JUNO: Because I know you. NUREYEV: You know what I've shown you. Nothing more. JUNO: Can't help but notice you haven't said it yet. NUREYEV: I don't need to play your game. JUNO: If you don't care it'd be really easy to.  "I never want to see you again." Like that. NUREYEV: Childish! JUNO: Once you let somebody know you, Nureyev, there's no going back. They've got your number. Chances are you got theirs, too. I let you know who I am because I love you and I'm scared as hell about what that means, but at least I can admit it, goddammit!”

Nureyev is desperately pushing the idea that Juno doesn’t know him, that Nureyev’s been lying all along, that the “Peter Nureyev” Juno knew was just another persona, that Juno never really knew the real Nureyev, just like he never knew the real Diamond. Because if Juno doesn’t know Nureyev, he can’t possibly love him, and that makes it so much easier to break up with him.

But there’s just one catch here. Juno does know Nureyev. As much as Nureyev wants to pretend that all Juno saw was what he let him see, it’s not true. Juno saw right to the core of him, right to the beating heart of what makes Peter Nureyev Peter Nureyev, and he refused to look away until he knew every inch by heart, and he loved what he knew. He still does. And that’s how he knows that Nureyev needs his help now, that’s why he’s not giving up on our favourite master thief.

And that is why this:

“NUREYEV: I do not want to see you any more, Juno. JUNO: What? NUREYEV: You said it would just take those words to excise you from my life entirely, didn't you? Well, I've said them. I have no interest in seeing you any longer. None. I am done. We are finished. Do you understand me? JUNO: Yeah, I get you. So I guess I'll just... go now. NUREYEV: No! JUNO: I... what?  NUREYEV: I... that is, you…”

didn’t surprise me. Well, the first bit did. But the turnaround made complete sense. Don’t get me wrong, it’s really shitty of Nureyev to do, but he’s at a point in his life where he’s not sure he can handle Juno being in his life, but he loves him far too much to tell him to leave. Even after he breaks up with him, he immediately backtracks.

And that’s why Juno keeps implying throughout the episode that Nureyev might take him back, and why he doesn’t leave at the end despite promising he would. Because he and I both know that Nureyev doesn’t want him to.

Juno never really hides who he is, and so people either love him or hate him. I think that’s really cool of him.

Nureyev hides who he is almost constantly, from almost everyone. It’s so much easier for him to pretend he did the same with Juno, and that’s what he’s trying to do. But he didn’t, so Juno isn’t giving up on him. Juno knows Nureyev, and he loves Nureyev, and so he’s not going to rest until Nureyev is finally okay (or relatively okay, at least).

TLDR: Juno didn't know Diamond all that well, so he couldn't be with her. Nureyev decided he wanted to know Slip so that he could learn to love him, but the opportunity was taken away from him. Juno comes to know Nureyev and he loves him because of it, but Nureyev is determined to go back to being unknown in season 5 so he can distance himself from Juno and pretend they're not in love. Knowing someone and loving them are linked, blah blah blah.

idk man I don’t have a conclusion these are just thoughts. Loving someone is inherently tied to knowing them, ig. Anyways who’s excited for Nureyev to have a mental breakdown???!!

[kumodeathflower]

Currently playing Deltarune chapter 1 on my switch and man, the OST is such a banger.

- Honestly i love exploring the house, the overworld just has such a comforting vibe that i can't quite describe, also Toriel is so sweet as a mom

- Noelle being sweet to Kris and not minding that they join her as partners (i love her and am totally not biased as Noelle kinnie)

- LANCERRR I MISSED THE LITTLE MAN

- Hugging Ralsei at the training dummy, his reaction is so cute. I love the fact that you can even choose to do this

- I kept throwing away Ralsei's manual and his reactions are just so funny 😭

- I really love Susie, how she's so stubborn and sarcastic.

- Susie: "Hey uh, why did you draw something that makes it look like you guys kiss?"

Ralsei: (it's okay to express yourself Kris)

FUCKING HELPME?? 😭

- Susie speaking to Kris in the elevator, and their friendship developing /pos

- Susie: "GET BACK HERE AND LET ME FLIRT WITH YOU"

- I tried doing Jevil's fight but i cannot dodge for shit. I gave up

- Tbh fighting the king is easy

- I just realised that after the fight, Susie's sprite changes so you can actually see her eyes now, instead of them being covered by her hair. I LOVE THIS LITTLE DETAIL

- Returning back to the overworld and just.. i felt a heartwarming feeling. It's so sweet that Susie genuinely wants to hangout again with Kris and sees them as her true friend.

- I called Toriel and she just seemed happy that Kris has a friend now 😭

- I love how Birdly actually was concerned for us and cares for us, but quickly after sticks back to his 'rival' persona lol

- (She's reading a comic full of hot demon guys) Me too Temie, me too

- (There's a book here)

(You lick the page...)

(It's delicious!)

(This must be what they mean by flavor text)

KRIS?? HELLO??

- Sans!!!! The wink, as if he doesn't recognise us smh, i love the bone trousling reference to Papyrus <3

- Why.. does Alphys live in the alley?? I genuinely can't remember

- ASGORE HUGGING KRIS 😭

- THE PICTURE OF THEIR WEDDING DAY BEING ON HIS FRIDGE 😭

- Catti and Bratty.. does everyone have a crush on Azzy or sum-

- Interactions with Noelle!! Her asking what Susie likes is so cute, i love interacting with her sm

I love chapter 1, that's all 🫶

[daz4i]

ok i have time to kill and nothing better to do and a kinnie brainrot slowly eating at my skull so. dazai animatic brainstorming time bc i can't draw or animate but i have ideas :)

song is debt collector by jhariah (can you tell i have mild brainrot abt his music lately) btw. go listen to it. i am no longer asking 🔫

It's all catching up to you now, hope you can run

the horse race scene basically.

Cause soon your past will come and drag you (Down, down)

jouno showing up and cuffing him

You scammed your way into Heaven

shot of dazai with the ada, looking like he's talking and they're listening

Til the angels realize you're not one of them

the image changes a bit - instead of regular current day dazai, he is now dressed as he did during the dark era, looking way more serious and empty

Here comes the debt collector, seems you owe him again

dazai in meursault, sitting across from fyodor's cell

Dollars and coins can't cut your check this time around

we see them talking, body language implying it's the scene right before nikolai takes them out of their cells

Here comes the debt collector, and you owe him again

start of the race, nikolai explaining the rules of the race

Kind words and lies won't save your head this time around, 'round, 'round

dazai pointing at sigma, choosing him, smiling

i think there's some music here so like. see them walking through meursault

Gravedigger, cordial killer, your payment is due, they're looking at you

with each. not word but ig section? as in after every comma, the image changes to different moments from dazai's time in the mafia, mainly hurting or killing people

We've done what we can, it's out of our hands

the talk dazai had with mori right before odasaku's death, very clearly mori speaking these lines

Sooner or later, it comes back again

dazai turning around and running out of the room, and as the next line enters, the scene changes from him running in the mafia hq to him running in meursault

Here comes the debt collector, seems you owe him again

he is walking with sigma down the hall, then grabs him

Dollars and coins can't cut your check this time around

they are dancing into the security room with the dead guards, and dazai immediately props himself by the microphone

Here comes the debt collector

this time it's not dazai being spoken to, but rather him talking to fyodor, we see him say these words, smiling

And you owe him again

but then his smile goes away as we see chuuya drowning next to fyodor as well

Kind words and lies won't save your head

dazai's gay ass flashback speech,

This time around

he turns around, and we get a hard cut to dazai and sigma in the elevator

Please don't think I have no empathy for you, what you've been through, but

fyodor talking!!!! fyodor by the mic, saying these exact words!!!! on the "but", he clicks a button

There's nothing I can do now but stand here and watch it all catch up to you

the room filling up with water, dazai and sigma slowly starting to drown

Here comes the debt collector, seems you owe him again

fire bursting, dazai shooting the gun, yknow that whole scene

Dollars and coins can't cut your check this time around

dazai kicking sigma out of the elevator -

Here comes the debt collector

and now we see him on the ground

And you owe him again

same pose, same scene, but now there's a gun against his forehead

Kind words and lies won't save your head

we see chuuya is the one holding the gun, and now dazai is raising his head to look at him, starting his whole "we are destined to-" thing

This time around

the gunshot

during the outro music, we can see him bleeding from his forehead

and that's it! short and simple. idk how vivid that one was esp given a lot of it just canon scenes and less imagery and symbolism but it's very vividly imagined in my head and i hope it is now in your head too :)

[zootzcoinzthingz]

RECENTLY EDITED DUE TO A MISTYPE IN OUR IDEALS SECTION LMFAOOO. WE DO N O T, IN FACT, SUPPORT CRINGE CULTURE.

ᜊ.. Hi there! feel free to call me zootz! you might recognize that name, that's because this is a sideblog of @zootzbootz

Onto proper introductions now, I go by many names! like zootz as said previously. however, you can also call me drew, louis, ruyu, or lordy. I am a highly feminine transgender rosneoman with a shitton on xenos tacked on! my pronouns are rot/cae/rat/bro/he/cloud/slush/narc/star and nor/mal. orientation wise, I'm an orchidbisexual mainbi cupioromantic omniaesthetic queerplatonic vincian! I reclaim "fag" btw :3 ... oh, both myself and the body are of adult age!

I'm part of a system, though general I'm going to be the main one running this blog!

ᜊ; I made this blog because I find coining terms to be incredibly fun, and wanted a special place for my terms! so, what can you expect from me? primarily, gender and orientation coinings or things that align with such. I can also make name, pronoun, and title packs either for fun or per request. I might also coin other terms. such as things relating to plurality or alterhumanity!

quick side note: I enjoy some media lot of people consider to be "problematic" I consume my interests critically.

ʚ ideals! ɞ

instead of having a traditional dni, I've decided instead to opt for an "ideals" list. letting you all know what we believe in so you can choose to opt in or out based upon that.

we support the following

1. xenogenders and neopronouns

2. "contradictory" labels (mspec lesbians/gays, lesboys, turigirls, etc)

3. genderfucky, pnc, and gnc folk

4. all forms of systems and plurality

5. alterhumanity, otherheartedness, copinglinks, otherkin, constells, endels, transspecies in a non transid way, and new-age kinnies

6. movements like acab, blm, defund the police, stand with ukraine, free palistine, etc.

7. all those with mental health disorders. even/especially the demonized ones

8. objectum and posic identities

9. pro-kink (our blog will be sfw but we DO support y'all!)

10. religious/spiritual folk (who are pro-queer)

--------

we don't support the following

1. pro-contact (harmful) paraphilias

2. alt-right stuff

3. radfems

4. radqueers

5. xenoids (due to the fact they are inherently anti xenogender)

6. capitalism

7. shielding bigotry with religion. (not exclusive to chritianity)

8. transid (transage, transabled, transrace/rcta)

9. narc abuse truthers

10. anything else that would oppose our ideals

ʚ want to send a request? make sure to follow my rules! ɞ

1. you cannot be against any of our ideals listed above!

2. do not request me to coin anything hateful or harmful.

3. send your request no more than one time.

4. be okay with the fact that there's a chance your request may not get made.

ʚ things I will and won't coin/post ɞ

WILL

- genders inspired by just about anything (minus a few fandoms)

- name/pronoun/title packs

- terms exclusive to conditions that we HAVE

- reclaim/remake/recoin terms made by exclusionists. (they will be given new names to avoid confusion and association)

WON'T

- poc exclusive genders/terms (our body is either white or whitepassing so I'm not comfy with that ! it's not my place!)

- terms exclusive to conditions we DON'T have

- hateful/harmful terms

- terms based off of dsmp, killing stalking, or any other fanbases I end up declining (they're just not my thing and I need to feel some connection to what I'm coining. it has nothing to do with the "problematic nature" of the media. I'm literally a south park fan LMAO)

ᜊ! who can use my terms?

everyone! even if you don't fit my ideals. if one of my terms registers with you, feel free to use it. you simply can't request new ones, and I'd prefer it if you didn't interact with the blog itself, or me at all.

the only exception to the "everyone can use my terms! " thing is if it's exclusive to a certain group.

❥ about reposting our terms.

if you repost our terms on Pinterest, it MUST have a link back to the original coining post, and you must align with our ideals.

if you post our terms on any lgbt/queer/mogai, etc wikis you must assign proper credit to me ofc.

moreover I'd appreciate asking before reposting my terms anywhere, but it's not required as long as you follow my other conditions.

[katyspersonal]

Hey for the fandom ask let’s change a little i’m curious to know what you think of Deltarune characters (& Undertale if no one else ask)

Oh, alright! Yeah, I do not address UTDR all that often despite avidly awaiting Deltarune's completion... This happens when I am into a thing but choose to not interact with the fandom! I will separate the games because even though UT and DR share some characters, even they are slightly differently portrayed.

(Asks from this ( x ) meme)

DELTARUNE:

❤Favorite character

This motherfucker is some of the most intimate and personal a character ever got to be for me:

I was actually so surprised by Literally Everything about him that I needed several days to process his EXISTENCE xD I absolutely love every single line he makes, and I feel strange deep relation to him (not kinnie one, but it feels spiritual). We are just on the same wavelength about being huge l00sers, being cringe but with a unique charisma, having intense mood swings, using weird humour and, of course, the whole 'perceiving the world as a simulation and going insane because of it'... I wish there was a legit term for 'the character I do not kin yet relate to and feel emotions of like they were my own'. I also once had a weird dream about him fusing with me into one entity to get to be 'real' using my human soul, and trust me, that was a whole TRIP for a considerable time. :')

👿Least favorite character

I will have to say Jevil, but this isn't entirely fair... Like I said, I am not ABLE to dislike a fictional character, ESPECIALLY by Toby, but with Jevil it is a love/hate relationship, so he is the only one who can even approach ;-; He is same category as Patches Fromsoft: the 'You have a lot to love about you, but... WHY.' kind of character. xD

💐Comfort character

Deltarune version of Asgore is THE definition of the soft man. Somewhat lingers with me that in UT timeline he murdered children, but... this just doesn't get to me. After all, most people are capable of terrible atrocities, it is only a matter of whether they meet the conditions that bring it up in them or not. Hehehe...

😍Character you have the biggest crush on

Surprisingly, not Spamton! We are only [[Serious Business Offer]], my [[babygirl]]! Instead, I fucking HAD to have a crush on the hypocritical weather wane bitch ass motherfucker idiot Rouxls Kaard! x_x I still can't justify it to this fucking day. I tend to only like characters that are smart and complex, but I guess his Style TM and charisma alone are irresistible.

🤝Character you relate to the most

You probably won't believe me, but... Noelle? Yeah, I know, this is very hard to communicate because she is sweet and soft but I am rude and abrasive, to say the least. Nonetheless, I am as far as kinning this character. There is a side of me that is alas not shown very often, however, close friends know of it. Christmas is my favourite holiday, I am very smart and talented but let people use me, I ask too many questions, I have some kindness to me, I am anxious and get startled easily, I am actually easy to push around the closer you are... Heck, sometimes I switch full mode into speaking like her, feeling like her and envisioning myself as her in my mind. x_x

It is a side of me that no longer shows often, nonetheless, it is still alive, like a soft core under a very thick skin. I also started to SERIOUSLY relate to her history after learning of the Snow Grave route.

🔥Character you think is overrated

I ammmm gonna say, Spamton NEO version! When this character became really popular, it felt as though everyone only cared about his NEO form! Yeah, they are the same character, actually, but it is more about the delivery! If you don't love Spamton at his 'silly super short failing salesman that lives in the trashcan', you don't deserve him at his 'tall cool robot' form!!!!1! /lh

🧨Character you love to hate

Rouxls Kaard again! I know, it is the only DR character that gave me even a semblance of attraction, but I will always bully him for the coward and hypocrite siding with the winning side that he is XD

🙈Character you always forget exists

That one red blob with a face that characters always act around as if that's their friend and someone famous. See, I do not even remember their name! This is how much I forget about them!

🐰Favorite non-human character

Deltarune has only one human character to begin with, so I will use this field as 'favorite unexplored character' instead. Well, I was actually rather fond of Diamond King in my time! Gave him hella headcanons and all that!

❤️‍🩹Character who deserved better

ALL THE KINGS!!!!!!!! Diamond, Heart and Club Kings - because they were just a haha funny cameo with only Diamond King having at least SOME lines. Spade King was handled well enough in the canon, but it was the fandom that gave him pretty bad treatment - from neglecting the nuance of his character to the outright ableism (I am serious). But even fandom aside, Spade King deserved better than having endured an obvious divorce from a rather shallow wife, being abandoned by his Knight and living in the bitterness about how Lightners treated the Darkners. No shit he became an unlikeable person. Like... can anyone treat him nicely?

UNDERTALE:

❤Favorite character

I love them all, but THE favorite got to be Undyne!

She is already the badass fish girlfriend in the normal timeline, however, her best traits sure get to shine in Merciless Route. Her speech about humans and monsters hearts beating as one just to continue existing absolutely won me over. The coolest character, hands down.

👿Least favorite character

No such thing, sorry! The closest I can think of is Muffet because unlike other bosses, she is Just There and is doing the smug anime girl moves, but she is still cute! Also I still like spiders ;-;

💐Comfort character

W. D. Gaster + Whatever fandom made out of W. D. Gaster (that mostly comes from interpreting Mystery Man sprite as him). But honestly, this character makes me happy! A mad scientist that accidentally cancelled his own existence and transcended beyond his own plane.

😍Character you have the biggest crush on

Stupid motherfucking Mettaton and his pretentious, full of self personality -_- Can you tell yet that I have a type? W. D. Gaster is the close second, however.

🤝Character you relate to the most

Honestly, Papyrus. Almost a kinnie. Again, something hard to explain, because you can see my personality doesn't match, but it is just... the whole 'looser that really wants approval but is THE manifestation of everything that won't make anyone except a few people appreciate him'. He is also silly, that I can relate to. I will turn goddamn full TWENTY SIX in April, but I am still just really silly and naive @_@

🔥Character you think is overrated

I don't know whether I want to say Sans, because he kindaaaaa deserved his popularity... I think it is more about how his potential was overrated. In every Undertale AU, he is the central figure, and like... THIS is my gripe. If you gonna alter universes, why not touch other characters?

🧨Character you love to hate

Mettaton, because he is a huge bitch, actually xd Like, yes, he is very attractive, but I also want to short his circuits and not in the way of a weird euphemism, but in a literal way :( Think of 'I want to strangle him' but in regards of a robot character. Fuck him for abandoning Napstablook and being mean to Alphys when she is clearly struggling with many issues in weird ways :( I still love him tho

🙈Character you always forget exists

Nice Cream guy! Only ever remember about him when he is brought up in his ship with Burgerpants.

🐰Favorite non-human character

Again, Undertale has like... TWO human characters, so I will reverse this point! Picking between All Two of them, I think I like Chara better than Frisk. They invoke so much sympathy, they were the only one who truly understood Asriel (by his OWN admission!), they take lacking trust and bullshit very seriously and were clearly a very strong-willed child.

❤️‍🩹Character who deserved better

The entire Dremurr family, including Chara. I mean... the whole plot sprouts from the tragedy of this family, so I guess this part is a no-brainer. Honorable mention is Alphys in the ending variant where Mettaton becomes the king, because it is heavily implied that she either committed minecraft or simply was in a terrible mental space enough to distance and disappear from society. I am thinking about that timeline every now and then. I even had a lost concept of her trying to run away from everything that fell on her and falling into rift in time, that changed her permanently. A never developed AU because people in a Discord server dissed my overly elaborate idea :(

Thank you for the ask though! I don't get to talk about UTDR side of me all that often, despite how much it means for me!

[butterscotch-brigade]

Can we see the Violetshine quote list

ASKLDJSALKJDAS SURE!!! (for context anon is talking abt an ask i sent to @/wc-confessions talking abt violetshine warriorcats where i mentioned i have a quote list for her LMAOOO)

this list is a combination of quotes said by her and quotes relating to her!! just stuff that rly hit me in the mentally ill kinnie brain aksljkldjf (putting under the cut to avoid this post getting unnecessarily long LOL. also all the quotes r screenshots but bc tumblr doesnt let u post more than 10 pics im gonna write em all down manually lol)

EDIT: HI SO UH. I HIT THE CHARACTER LIMIT WHILE I WAS WRITING THESE DOWN ASKJDSKL SO THIS LIST IS INCOMPLETE OOPS SORRY. BUT U GET THE IDEA

Besides, Ratscar's words were still gnawing at Violetkit too sharply to allow her to concentrate on Littlecloud. She's not really one of us, is she? She'd heard the skinny, dark brown elder's meow as she passed the elders' den that morning. He was talking about me.

Darktail stared at her. "What's it like living with Clan cats when you know you're an outsider?"

She tried not to remember how lonely she felt in the Clan. How Pinenose's kits ignored her. How she wasn't allowed near Grassheart's kits in case she passed on an infection. "They try to make me feel welcome." Her breath caught in her throat. Don't they? Darktail leaned closer. "And yet you don't."

I'm not wanted here. I never truly was.

Twigpaw only comes to see me when she wants something. She hasn't tried to find me in the four moons since I left. Hasn't she been worried about me? She huffed to herself. She thinks her needs are more important than anyone else's.

Anger surged through her. Did no cat want her? She'd spent her life being passed around by other cats. First Alderpaw had taken her from her mother's nest. Then Rowanstar had snatched her from ThunderClan. Then Needletail had taken her to the rogues. This was the first time she'd had any choice in the matter, and she was choosing ShadowClan. They were lucky!

She searched Violetpaw's gaze for a reaction, but Violetpaw seemed unmoved. Pity swamped her. When had Violetpaw stopped expecting to be loved?

"Oh, Twigpaw." Sympathy flooded Violetpaw's gaze. "You always want to be close to some cat." "Don't you?" Twigpaw frowned, puzzled. "I guess I just didn't think it was possible."

"Let's never forget we have each other. We're kin, and that's stronger than being Clanmates or denmates. We'll always be close. Nothing will ever change that."

She didn't understand. Twigpaw had said she wanted to be close to her. They'd talked about being sisters--how that was more important than anything. You made me trust you!

"You can't leave!" she wailed. Twigpaw stared at her from among her Clanmates. "I can't stay." Why not? Fury surged through Violetpaw. Why had Twigpaw begged to stay close if she was just going to leave?

Violetpaw bit into her mouse, stung by Twigpaw's words. Violetpaw has always been sensitive. Her sister hadn't meant them meanly but it felt like a criticism.

Violetpaw glanced back at him. Talking about Pebbleshine seemed to have made him happy, even though she was dead. Was that how it was when you lost someone you loved? Her thoughts drifted to Needletail. Even thinking of her friend made Violetpaw's chest tighten with grief. I could never talk about Needletail happily. Not after what happened.

"You're abandoning me again!"

"You left me when we were in ShadowClan. And you're leaving me now. All for your precious ThunderClan! What's so special about them? They're just a bunch of meddling know-it-alls. Why do you want to be with them instead of me?"

"I don't care!" Violetshine hissed. "I don't care if you're not happy! What about me? Why am I never allowed to be happy?" Her eyes rounded as though she realized what she'd said. Her body shook. She dropped her gaze. "I'm sorry," she mumbled. "I just believed that everything was finally going to be the way I dreamed it would be."

Hawkwing pressed against them, soothing Violetshine with a gentle stroke of his tail. "Twigpaw is right," he meowed softly. "We will always be kin. We'll miss Twigpaw, but isn't it better to know she's found where she belongs than to live with her knowing she wishes she were somewhere else?" Violetshine lifted her glistening gaze. "I just wish she wanted to be with us," she mewed thickly.

He'll probably decide to move on, she told herself, trying to ignore the hollow feeling in her chest. Just one more cat who leaves me behind, whether he means to or not.

"He is," Violetshine admitted. "A bit like you. Except he follows through."

Twigpaw gasped, stung by her sister's words. "Look," she meowed, "I'm sorry about leaving SkyClan, but I just didn't belong there, as much as I wanted to." When there was no response from Violetshine, she asked, "Haven't you ever felt that way?" "More times than I would have liked," Violetshine sighed.

"This is for Needletail!"

Anger surged in Twigbranch's chest. "But you can't leave me!" She glared at Violetshine. "How can you go after all we've been through?" Violetshine stared back at her in surprise. "But you left me, over and over."

Rootpaw had heard stories about Darktail and his Kin, and how they had nearly destroyed ShadowClan. And he knew that for a while his mother had been part of the Kin, and that she had eventually helped to destroy it. But Violetshine had always refused to talk about it. Too raw, too painful, Tree had explained to him and Needlepaw.

"I can't do it," she meowed. "I worked too hard to find my kin. I could never leave Hawkwing."

"But if Bramblestar is violet toward other cats, especially those in his own Clan - cats he is supposed to care for - then he must be stopped." Her voice shook a little as she added, "I learned about that from Darktail."

Rootpaw stared at his mother. She must feel very strongly to mention Darktail. Normally she never talks about that part of her life.

[sirenemale]

Thoughts on dovewing or hollyleaf? I say this as a dovewing kinnie

Cracks my knuckles

THEY'RE BOTH HUGE FAVS OF MINE. Back in my kin era I kinned them both hahaha. Hollyleaf is my ultimate favourite warrior cats character I'm so normal about her PROMISE. I'm gonna go on for ages but my affection for these characters is mainly bc of my own interpretation and projection on them (As is the case with most wc fans I feel).

I'll start with Dovewing! The way her emotional issues were brushed aside was INSANE to me. To me she was such a normal kid thrust into this immense world ending drama that she was told she had to stop, because she got power she didn't ask for, that overwhelm her senses and emotions constantly. She's neurodivergent & desperately trying to mask for her clan. Lionblaze, Jayfeather & Ivypool are not kind to her, I think she should have been the one to get drawn into the dark forest. It'd actually make good on the idea that the 3 could have become tools for evil, it makes good on her care for other clan cats and her frustration over not being able to help them when she knows they need it. I just like her, she's sweet, I think she's very grounded and deserved better. Issues with her and tigerheart aside I think her choosing Shadowclan and settling down with him was really cute, I'm glad she left for a better environment for herself, I hate that Ivypool never stopped being cruel to her. I also am addicted to the tension of Lionblaze and Jayfeather overlooking her bc she's younger and bc she's just Not hollyleaf. Like it's so tragic it's so rough and I resonate with her immensely for that. Like no one is being outright cruel but you can Tell you aren't what they want, and that kind of thing eats at a person, and I think it ate at her when she wasn't around cats she felt seen around (Tigerheart, Purdy ect). She lost her childhood and basically lost her sister, realized how much she wasn't living up to what anyone wanted her to be, and she chose to leave for herself. I like her. I care about her. Um. Niftysenpai's dovewing mv is one of my favourite wc videos ever.

Okay Hollyleaf GOD. My take on her is like INSANELYYYYYY projection heavy but like. To me she is ultimate victim to the clan structure. She grew up under a dogmatic and strict religion and society and takes pride in moralizing about the code to others, she takes pride in being powerful and ambitious, she wanted to be a med cat because it was important. Idk if I made this up but I swear I remember Leafpool saying she wasn't very delicate with herbs, and I love the idea of these ambitious and powerful traits being admired in the clan and also reviled if the cat in question is "Evil". I like the idea of Hollyleaf feeling an immense pressure to balance herself, recite the code to prove she was good, prove she's not heavy handed or fight hungry like the text sometimes implied. Ngl I kind of really like the idea of her having a bit of the bramble/tigerstar complex. So the fact she takes so much purpose in the code only to find that her own birth breaks the rules? Finding out she wasn't part of some god given prophecy like her brothers. It's brutal. Me as a guy with religious trauma thoughts went cuhrazy. I find her spiral and breakdown so so so so compelling, I love the idea of her still trying to live by increasingly distorted versions of the code. Justifications of killing ashfur, regret, guilt, shame, repenting to the gathering ect.

I do wish she had gotten a better conclusion? I don't think the tunnels plot line or her coming back only to die was like. Anything at all. Idk what I would have written instead, tho I am making a pmv with her so u will see my take on her eventually in video. There's a lot of hollyleaf videos I really like but Cheetehz's hollyfawn map is the closest I've seen to hitting my view of her. Someone who has tried so so hard to prove herself and be of use, keeping her head up and crushing down some part of her that's hurt by failing those expectations. I like her breakdown being a straw on the camels back moment instead of a surprise.

[dddemigirl]

👄 VENT-ERAN TAG 👄

a tag meme about your time on the Vent app made by PIKO !!

════════════════

✹ Did anyone tag you?

➥ Nah

✹ What's your current Vent UN?

➥ 10thtimelord. I’m quite proud of it.

✹ Do you change your username often? Do you alternate between a few?

➥ No

✹ Do you trade usernames?

➥ No

✹ Do you have any dreamies? Why do you want them?

➥ I really wanted TwilightSparkle for a while.

✹ What was your username when you first joined Vent?

➥ Honestly I’m not sure. It may have been WolfandDragon.

✹ When did you join?

➥ @/L3SBIAN was my original account. As it says there I joined nine years ago. Damn.

✹ Why did you decide to join? How did you learn about Vent?

➥ I don’t remember exactly how but it was likely through Tumblr.

✹ Do you identify as kin? How serious is it?

➥ Yep. Used to have a kin related tumblr blog n everything. It’s never been a huge part of my life but when I consume media related to my kins I get the brainrot again.

✹ Did you identify as kin before joining Vent? Did you know about kin before Vent?

➥ Yes, I learned about it through the hellsite Tumblr of course.

✹ Did you ever buy usernames, back when we could do that?

➥ No

✹ Did you hoard usernames before it was banned?

➥ No. The only username that I’ve kept that I don’t use is @/CHVRCHES because they’re my favorite band. 🩵

✹ Do you have a Vent subscription?

➥ Nah, I’m poor

✹ What is your favourite permanent emotion set? Favourite limited set?

➥ It’s very hard to choose! I really like Werewolf, Solar Eclipse, Sci-Fi, Punk Day, Pride, LGBT+ Pride, Emo Day, Earth Day, Disability Awareness, Digital…

✹ Do you actually choose emotions based on how you feel, or do you choose defaults for an aesthetic?

➥ Both

✹ How important is aesthetic to you on this app? How much time do you spend to choose a nice aesthetic, if you make a conscious effort to do so?

➥ I like when things look nice but sometimes I don’t really put much thought into it.

✹ Were you ever mutuals with "infamous" users? Any stories to tell about mutuals, in general?

➥ Probably but I’ve been on the app for 9 years so I can’t remember who they were.

✹ Have you ever been suspended? Deleted? Banned? Why?

➥ Not that I’m aware.

✹ If you had to guess, how much real money would you say you've put into the mouth app?

➥ I bought some rubber bracelets to support Vent in 2016 or 17. I never received them. I don’t remember how much that they cost.

✹ Have you contributed to Vent culture at all (made tag memes, emotions/emotion sets, caused rule changes, run big groups, etc)?

➥ I think that I made some tag memes but that was it.

✹ Any pet peeves relating to the userbase?

➥ Yeah but it’s not anything different from the rest of the internet that bugs me as well.

✹ Is Vent your primary social media? How often do you post?

➥ No. I don’t use it as often as I used to.

✹ What do you think about Vent staff?

➥ They’re okay.

✹ Has Vent taught you anything, about others, yourself, or the world? What was it?

➥ I knew this before Vent but Vent really cemented this for me; that people will assume the worst about you all of the time. Especially when they’re reacting to something in a knee-jerk way instead of taking time to think before they type.

════════════════

How many of these milestones, dramas, and elements of Vent Culture™ are familiar to you? Place an emoji after each you recognise. Feel free to tell stories! Not in chronological order.

Drew: 🍉

[WTF]:

Jeremy:

Sarahah: 🍉

Thiscrush: 🍉

Crytyping:

"BREADY":

Mark Smith:

Vent merch: 🍉 (see above)

Vent Angels: 🍉

"DEPRESSED":

Sans ketchup:

Johari window:

No dropdowns:

Most Discussed:

"Don't read" posts:

Buying emotion sets: 🍉

The big server move:

"Creative" set created:

Joker kinnie knife attack:

"SALTY" racism discourse:

"Never [SAME] my posts":

No Mutual Listeners setting:

"DNLI double of mutuals' kins":

All emotions had the same ints:

"Privileges & disprivileges" in bio:

Hashtags disabled (again & again): 🍉

A (consistently) working search function: 🍉

"Are you that kid on tumblr with the c*llouts":

"We can't make white emotions!":

"CRISPY" antisemitism discourse:

Removed from the Appstore:

Emotion Suggestions group: 🍉

"SLUSHY" JD discourse:

Rebecca Sugar factkin: 🍉

St*ff Appr*ciation Set: 🍉

Muted words feature: 🍉

Vent Subscriptions: 🍉

Dean's Bald Head:

Nightmode, finally: 🍉

UN hoarding ban: 🍉

App icon change:

Hot Takes Group: 🍉

Therapy Chatbot:

The Grey Area: 🍉

Ventstruggle: 🍉

Colored text: 🍉

V*ntidrama:

"Get to 10":

"Get to 13":

Buying UNs: 🍉

Scottcourse: 🍉

Nyacourse:

Curiouscat: 🍉

#saveVent:

Groups: 🍉

════════════════

✹ Why do you stay on this Hell App?

➥ Old habits die hard

✹ What is the best thing about Vent?

➥ My autism likes the colorful & cute emotion sets. I like pressing the buttons. It’s satisfying.

✹ What is the worst thing?

➥ Cyberbullying, death threats, bigotry, h*rny men

✹ Anyone you wanna tag?

➥ Anyone who’d like to do this

════════════════

thank you for doing my meme! g'dspeed, soldier.

[seth-burroughs]

Holy fuck a pinned post.. It's one of those pinned posts isn't it

What's up gamers I post Rain Code (literally just the peacekeepers) (it's a Yomi world no mercy). I don't tag spoilers so do with that what you will

Names include: Seth, Mateusz, Andrzej, Jaspis, Karneol, Sylwester, Stefan, Kosma, Cezary/Czarek, Sójka and Mikołaj. I collect names like cool rocks, you can basically pick and choose on which ones you use to refer to me on any given day, I don't really care. He/it/xe exclusively (for Yomi), and yes, they/them IS misgendering can you not pleaseee *looking at you with my big wet eyes*. On a similiar note, I'll prefer to not be referred to with any feminine terms like ever, I don't care if it's a joke/slang/whatever. "girl" isn't gender neutral guys what the huh I am going to become the joker

Yomi Hellsmile fictionkin* in like, the serious/metaphysical way. (Can't believe Yomi got real and is now prowling around somewhere in the bowels of central Europe that's so cool right). That's also why I drop the I/me oftentimes whenever I talk about Yomi, in case you were confused about that.

I'm generally pretty hesistant to interact with people that also call themselves kin (and especially "kinnies"), as I'd rather not involve myself with the kff crowd or other people that treat being fictionkin as an extension of fandom, and unfortunately I can't always tell whether somebody is using it in good faith or not, but I don't like to assume things about people based off of very limited information like a few posts, either. Where was I going with this? Basically uh, having my eyes pried open and forced to witness late 2010s (fiction)kin drama has turned me extra sensitive and it's day 2137 of me telling people to please look up what being otherkin even means before using it for themselves I'm begging

If anybody has questions of any kind concerning the whole thing (whether it's purely for info's sake or more personal) then I'm fine with answering as long I'm given basic amounts of respect (no calling me a kinnie, no making me into a punchline, no making weird assumptions about me based off my kintype, no getting weirdly personal about it if you're another fictionkin from my source??)

*only concerning yomi, who might either be a fictionkin/fictive/who cares since apparently we're actually plural. uh oh. pinned might need further revisions but also im perpetually tired so. Later

Very often I have trouble with memory and articulating myself and whatever I write may end up looking a bit weird or just near incomprehensible and unfortunately there's nothing I can currently do about it. While I love receiving them, I might take very long to forever to actually answer an ask due to either low energy or anxiety. This should should go without saying but if you make fun of me for it like ever you're getting hard blocked into the sun

I'm autistic - don't tone police me. Sometimes I can't read sarcasm or playful rudeness. Don't expect me to understand or tolerate it when you start insulting me as a "joke", my autism & NPD wombo combo makes me really hurt by that sort of stuff. Or just. Don't expect strangers in general to be fine with that?? I kind of hate how normalized just being mean to people ironically has become.

I don't do "DNI"s as they're just objectively pretty stupid and ineffective, and just block people as I see fit. Instead, if you're curious about those, here are my boundaries under the cut which are optional reading - but might be helpful if you'd like to avoid getting blocked over accidentially crossing some of them:

I get very anxious over people leaving their negative opinions on/getting aggressive over Yomi under my posts, trust me I don't need nor want to hear it. You can go hate him literally anywhere else, why are you doing that here.

Nsft stuff might occassionally be referenced/discussed on this blog, but please never leave weirdly sexual asks/tags in relation to Yomi/me, even as jokes. It makes me incredibly uncomfortable and I will block over it from now on.

(continuing from above point: these sorts of comments are still usually perfectly fine to leave on the yaoihellsmile blog)

If you're wondering, or about to ask as to why I might have you blocked: I block very liberally over all sorts of stuff no matter how small, so I most of the time probably don't even know either.

I don't check carrds, sometimes I don't check pinned posts either. If you don't want me going through your stuff, the block button is simply the best way to do that. No hard feelings, I promise

If you bring up shipping discourse I'm compressing you into a cube. It's 2024 who fucking cares over which pixels you draw making out none of this is real consider logging off and caring about some actual problems

Probably will add onto those in the future. We'll see. anyway...

You're getting a krówka for reading all that👍👍

[kingdescole]

reading through my kin mem manifesto is really making me realize that some of my plans could have actually worked out in my favor if i didn’t just have to sabotage my own relationships. like, if i could have just handled and accepted being loved instead of being violently repulsed by any sort of intimacy, maybe things wouldn’t have gone to shit so quickly? Randall was doing FINE going along with the plan, it was MY impatient ass that had to go off the books to become “Angela” (in the most horrid and unconvincing way) to beg Henry for the Mask of Order every two seconds...even though i KNEW he didn’t have it. my plan itself was FLAWLESS. it was my last ditch effort to rush the execution so i could get the hell out of my perfectly healthy relationships that ruined it. same thing with stealing the keystone from Aurora. i could’ve just let them keep it, gone with them to the sanctuary AS A GROUP--we would ALL get there before Targent, i could have just waited to steal it after we were inside the sanctuary if i cared THAT MUCH about being the only one to awaken the Azran Legacy--but no, i had to steal it right then and there, because i couldn’t stand being part of a genuine family. had to stab them all in the back just because i couldn’t handle being sincerely cared about. ridiculous.