#but i DO see what Jorge was trying to do and why he went this route

[fluffypotatey]

i understand that the whole “Odysseus torturing the fuck out of Poseidon at the end of the Vengeance Saga” might put some people out because of all the factors of “Poseidon is a god and cannot die” and “this will just piss him off further in reality” and “Odysseus is a mortal he shouldn’t be able to do that!”

however,

have you considered the catharsis of the act? like i know in the original legend, the catharsis is when Ody slays all the suitors, but in the context of this musical, Ody’s action makes sense for the storyline Jorge gave for these two

like we were always going to get a reprise because of how the melodies in Ruthlessness foreshadow it (as well as other songs that inform us that Poseidon is still a threat) and the god’s taunting at Ody. not to mention the whole build up of Odysseus finally turning off his heart

like we all knew that by this point Odysseus would no longer be the same man from the beginning. this action (torturing a god) is a blatant choice, showcasing the transformation from Man to the Monster that arrives onto Ithaca’s shores

but sure i understand why this choice might put some people off, but also remember that by the end of the legend, Athena ensures that no one is allowed to harm Odysseus

[protagaster]

Hello, all! My hyper-fixation and maladaptive daydreaming scenarios are currently centering around the fantastic EPIC! the Musical, created by the amazing Jorge Rivera-Herrans!

However, because I have a female main character bias, I tend to imagine the songs as if they were sung by my current best girl: Penelope.

Thankfully, two artists went ahead and drew this into reality: @vioofc and @too-much-flynnolium. Inspired by their works of perfection, I have gone and wrote the first of many vignettes based around this Warrior Penelope AU!

There is also a version on Ao3, if you prefer that platform over Tumblr!

EDIT (10/7):

Hello all! I'm in the process of heavily editing this AU in order to have it:

A) Make more sense

B) Fit the timeline better

You'll notice some changes here and there in the story! Some of the content was cut, but don't worry! I'm gonna add it into a fic of its own in the future, so look out for that! ;)

(Credit to @w3ndytheraccoon for an excellent idea of theirs I included in this AU! You'll see it towards the end!)

A King with no Queen (EPIC! Swap AU)

Odysseus is trying to cope with many things. 

His failure forced his beloved Penelope to fight the Trojan war in his stead, leaving behind all she ever knew and what she thought herself to be. In turn, the King was left to run his kingdom and raise their daughter all by himself. 

This is how things have been for the past 12 years. And now, to make things even harder, the first of his suitors have made themselves at home in his palace…

~

Odysseus is a rare kind of man. 

In fact, it was not uncommon for the King of Ithaca to be compared to a single drachma coin. There seemed to be two completely opposing sides driving him:

On one end, Odysseus was the alluring, cunning, quick-witted man that achieved many impressive feats throughout his life. 

He was deemed ready and crowned King of Ithaca at the young age of 13, despite his father being very much alive. He passed her challenge and was gifted the guidance of the Goddess of Wisdom herself, something he very much boasted to all who would listen.

He even fell in love with a Princess of Sparta!

And, despite the warnings of those closest to him, she too fell in love and accepted his hand, regardless of how small and lacking his humble Ithaca was compared to the grandiose and luxurious Spartan kingdom. 

Yes, despite being relatively smaller and having considerably less strength when compared to his fellow Greek man, Odysseus was a warrior with an arguably more valuable and sought after prowess: a warrior of the mind. 

So why, even with these innate talents and gifts of intellect, was it not enough to keep him from harm during that first year of war? 

Why was it not enough to keep her, the only person whose life he desired more than his own, to have to pay for his hubris? 

That was where the other side of Odysseus’ drachma came into view, a side of despair. A side of longing. A side that waited… 

~

“Your Majesty…”

Eurylochus waited for a moment, staring at the king from the double-doors of his bedchamber balcony. 

… 

Nothing. 

“Odysseus…” Eurylochus tried again, if not for a response then hoping for at least some form of acknowledgment.

… 

Still nothing. 

Eurylochus was unsure of what to do. 

It was far too early for his liking; the sun was still in the oceans’ embrace, the sky a dark indigo with only a few streams of orange light penetrating its serenity. 

The day was only just beginning. Any other morning Eurylochus would most likely still be asleep, albeit prepared to wake once the early light illuminated his dark and lonely bedroom. 

However, this day was not like any other. 

And so, with great reluctance for more than one reason, Eurylochus woke early to fetch his king. One of his best friends. His brother. 

And this made him nervous. 

Not to wake the other, mind, as Odysseus always woke within the first instances of Helios’ light. 

No, Eurylochus was nervous because of what the day represented. 

And so, in an act that could have been either futile avoidance, petty rebellion, or a sad mix of both, Eurylochus allowed his brother to have this one moment of disassociation. 

Meanwhile, on the other end of the balcony, Odysseus continued to sit peacefully in his kline. He had chosen not to respond to the call of his name, despite knowing the urgency behind Eurylochus’ visit. 

Instead, Odysseus chose to stay true to his personal morning ritual: sitting in silence with morning’s first light.

He had honored this custom for more than a decade; he did not want today to be the one time he disturbed his routine, nor did he want to leave the comfort the balcony’s kline brought him. 

Every morning he sat in silence, waiting. Every morning he sat in his designated seat, the left side of the kline, soothed by what it represented. 

After all, it was Penelope’s very first contribution when brought to her new home. 

Odysseus remembered when the young couple had picked out the kline upon their first week of engagement, with Penelope first to declare that the right side belonged to her. Odysseus remembered laughing, saying that it made sense "considering she is always right". 

The kline was placed on the left side, on the farthest corner of their bedroom balcony. In this place the loveseat had a perfect view, with Ithaca’s beaches on one side and the villages of the common folk on the other. Penelope always loved this spot, for if she wanted she could see the sky kiss the ocean and embrace the beaches from above, or the hustle and bustle of her people, satisfied and content with their lives, down below. 

At first Odysseus did not understand why Penelope would subject herself to wake so early in the morning simply to gaze upon the rising sun. Now, only after she had been forcefully sent away, did he understand how something as simple as the day’s first light could bring an instance of happiness to an otherwise age of despair. 

And thus led to his daily ritual, one he has promised never interrupted no matter what.  

Every sunrise for the past 12 years, starting from the moment he woke, the King of Ithaca would spend a few minutes staring at the various views outside his bedroom balcony; it was never too long, but the minutes always lingered with a heavy sense of despair and longing.

...

How long has it been, Odysseus couldn’t help but wonder, since he last saw his wife lounging in their kline. When was the last time she beckoned him to join her with a wave of her delicate hand, appreciating the open air whilst the kingdom was in a state of silent calm and peace. 

Too long, Odysseus concluded to himself. 

“Ody…” 

Odysseus flinched, knowing the other only called him by that name when all other options failed. 

Finally turning to acknowledge his visitor, Odysseus saw Eurylochus leaning against the door frame. His best friend, his brother, was watching him with a sad look in his eyes. 

“It’s been 3 years,” Eurylochus' voice was sad, betraying the attempt of stoicism in his eyes. “They aren’t coming back-”

“You don’t know that.” Odysseus yelled out sternly. Unfortunately, he immediately regretted it when he saw Eurylochus let out a heavy sigh with his shoulders slumping in unison.  

“Eury… I-I’m sorry-” 

“It’s okay, Ody,” Eurylochus said with a smile that was not at all genuine. “I know.” 

Odysseus wanted to kick himself. After all, he and Eurylochus were stuck in the same horrible situation. 

Both men waited, longing for someone that was no longer by their side. Both men woke alone inside their isolated, dark, empty bedchambers, at one point naively unaware of how large a bed could be until that fateful day 12 years ago. 

Both men waited, longing for the return of their wives: Queen Penelope of Ithaca and her best friend and second in command, Princess Ctimene.  

It had been 13 years since the Trojan war officially began, a petty debate between the Gods leading to Helen’s abduction. Menelaus and Agamemnon drafted Helen’s suitors to help in her rescue, using Odysseus’ proposed oath to defend her husband against those who would dare to challenge him. 

Odysseus had tried to avoid this draft through various means, but each attempt ended unsuccessfully. He was required to fight in this war, forced to take with him only the best of his Ithacan warriors. He remembered his tearful goodbyes to Penelope and Telemachas, filled to the brim with sorrow at having to leave his beautiful wife and newly-born daughter. 

From then on, since he first set foot on Trojan soil and every subsequent battle thereafter, Odysseus would pray to the Gods to find a way to end his term in the war. Anything to return back to Ithaca as quickly as possible. 

The Gods were quick to grant his wish. 

That first year of war no one could have expected things to turn out as they did. 

The men had secretly infiltrated the Palace of Troy using various spies, successfully sneaking Helen out and tucking her aboard the first ship back to Greece. Unfortunately, the Trojans were quick to discover her disappearance. 

The Trojans took their revenge the next night. The Greek army, beyond ecstatic that their primary goal had been achieved, went to sleep that night with their bellies filled with meat and cups poured with more wine than water. 

None of them noticed the dead quiet of the nature surrounding them. 

The Trojans, with their own spies implanted in the Greek army, had found their hidden camps. Before the men of Greece realized it, they were too late. They were struck without mercy, the etiquettes of war no longer a priority.  

The Greeks, despite their night of festivities, put up one hell of a fight. The battle took hours, lasting from the darkness of night up until the early crack of dawn. 

The Trojans quickly retreated once early light hit. However, the damage was done.

In the struggle Menelaus and his closest brothers-in-arms were taken prisoner, held as a form of ransom. Odysseus was the only one in Menelaus' circle to avoid this capture, for Eurylochus and the rest of his Ithacan crew refused to allow the Trojans the glory of kidnapping their king whilst under their watch.

Though there were few deaths, the Greek men were maimed and damaged beyond repair. 

The lucky ones had escaped the confrontation with more scars and wounds littering their bodies, though they were the ones likely to return to combat after a short time of recovery. The unlucky ones, the majority of the men, had been struck deep in the flesh. Their injuries sustained left no meager scars or wounds, but permanent physical hindrances to their limbs and muscles. 

Odysseus was speared in his left shoulder. Though the gash had closed and relatively faded 12 years later, he could no longer maneuver his arm as easily as before. Without his weekly massages and leather brace, which he wore only when surrounded by those he trusted, he couldn’t even wield his bow as effortlessly as he once did. 

Eurylochus was sliced in his left eye, leaving him permanently blind from that view. He had also been struck in his leg, though it was not as severe as his previous injury and had already come to a full recovery.

Regardless, the state of the current Greek army was too grave to ignore. 

A few handfuls of the men, those deemed fit and well enough to continue combat, were left behind to hold down the front lines. The rest, consisting of practically their entire army, were sent back home to recover and sustain what little dignity they still had. 

Though he had been permanently damaged, Odysseus couldn’t help but see a small silver lining. Even if it wasn’t how he expected, the Gods had granted his wish. Now, he was able to stay by Penelope’s side and raise their daughter together. 

If only he had known then what he knew now. 

Even though the men could no longer partake in battle, Greece still needed an army. And of course, for the sake of their own petty interests, this is when the Gods intervened. 

Almost immediately after he had returned home, the God of War himself stood before them with his signature spear in hand. However, he was not there to speak with the King. 

He was there to make a demand of the Queen. 

Ares ordered his student, Penelope, and her unofficial sisters-in-arms, women trained in combat with the blessings of the God of War and Goddess of the Hunt, to fight in the war against Troy on his behalf. All of this was to “make up” with Hera, after first siding with the Trojans on Aphrodite’s request. 

Odysseus remembered how he pleaded, begging to return to the battlefield in his wife’s place. Pride and flesh be damned! 

Odysseus knew what Penelope’s life would look like in Troy, having experienced it himself for the past year. Even if she had sufficient knowledge in the art of combat, trained by her life as a Spartan and student of Ares, she was still a traditional woman who enjoyed traditional womanly activities. Fighting and killing in the name of the Gods as a woman had never been heard of before that point! 

And then there was Telemachas, their beautiful baby girl who was only a single year old. What would her life look like, growing up without her mother to guide her through the trials of womanhood? 

Unfortunately no amount of begging and pleading, nor the King’s friendship with Athena, could spare his wife of her mentor’s decree; neither could it spare the many other women trained in the art of defense. 

Within the next two month a portion of Ithaca’s women, those of age and combat experience, boarded the ships to war. 

The next 12 years consisted of a mixed flurry of emotions. 

Of those 12 years it took 9 before the war came to an end. Helen, once nothing more than a damsel in distress, proved her strength to everyone with her contribution to the war. After rescuing Menelaus and the other captive men, the royalty of Troy were killed off to the last drop of blood. Rumors circulated within the Greek world that Penelope had a great hand to play in their victory, but the specificities were never clarified. 

Eurylochus, along with the people of Ithaca, recalled the look of pure joy in their King’s eyes when the messenger gave them the news. Many thought their King’s happiness was due to his wife’s battle prowess being praised by all who could speak, but those closest to Odysseus knew the truth.

Odysseus was ecstatic that his wife was finally coming home. 

Penelope would once again be inside his arms! Her warmth, her voice, her scent, they all would no longer be reduced to a distant memory. The people of Ithaca would once again have their Queen, and Telemachas could finally meet and learn from the mother she had heard so many wonderful stories about. 

That’s how things should have been by now. And yet, 3 years after the war’s end, the wives and daughters of Ithaca had still not returned. 

Many held out hope in the beginning, thinking that the womens’ delay was only a momentary setback. They believed it would not be much longer, that the women would return any day now. 

However, days turned into months. And those months quickly became years. 

With their hope dying alongside their wives and now presumed to now be widowers, the husbands and fathers of Ithaca reacted in very different ways. Many remarried, desperate to once again have their homes filled with the comfort of a wife and care of a mother. The rest could not bear the thought of remarriage, taking up vows of celibacy in honor of their fallen wives and praying to the Gods that their love alone would be good enough for their children. 

The one thing they all had in common: they had lost hope of their wives ever returning to Ithaca. 

This was where Odysseus differed from them all. 

His people, Eurylochus, and now even Polites had tried telling him how likely it was that Penelope perished at sea. They reminded him that as the King of Ithaca it was his duty to find a new Queen. The kingdom needed a female role model alongside the male, to help him rule and lead their kingdom to prosperity. This was the standard procedure for royalty in Greece.

But Odysseus was never one to follow the standard procedure. 

“Some of our… visitors… are making themselves at home in the throne room.” Eurylochus finally broke the silence once again, reminding Odysseus of the very thing he was trying to disassociate from. “They’re asking when you’ll go to see them.” 

Odysseus couldn’t mask his frustration. 

3 years. That’s all those selfish dogs had given him to “mourn” for the love of his life, for the mother Telemachas never had the chance to know. 

And now that the 3 years were up, they expected him to move on just like that. 

“Already?” Odysseus commented as he rose from his left seat, almost feeling impressed with the desperation of his so-called guests. “Helios hasn’t even finished placing the sun in its morning spot.”

“C’mon, you and I know human nature better than anyone.” Eurylochus scoffed, having to turn his head to get a proper view of the palace yards beginning to pack with various women and their guards. “Who would ever resist the chance to obtain more power?” 

Odysseus let out a scoff of his own as he walked back inside his bedchamber, practically identical to Eurylochus’. Though his expression was quick to change into one of concern. 

“What of Telemachas!? Is she-” 

“She’s still sleeping. I went to check on her before coming to get you.” Eurylochus answered calmly to Odysseus’ growing anxiety. “I knew you’d ask, so I figured I’d get it out of the way.”

Odysseus let out a sigh of relief. Eurylochus was one of the very few people he trusted with the keys to his palace, which meant he was one of the only few with the ability to open the doors of the royal bedchambers. 

If Telemachas was still asleep, then that meant she would be spared of the wrath and judgments of the “guests” below. For now. 

He would have to check in on her later, for both their sakes. 

Meanwhile, for the sake of maintaining peace, Odysseus had a duty to greet his guests and show them hospitality. Even if he didn't want to. 

And he really, really didn't want to. 

~

Odysseus, now wearing his royal chiton and elegant gold crown, walked down the halls of his palace with his head held high. Eurylochus walked by his side, hand strategically placed near the handle of his broadsword, ready to protect his King from strangers with ill intent. 

It did not take long to make their way to the palace throne room. Given how small Ithaca was as a kingdom, it made sense for the royal palace to look smaller in comparison to neighboring palaces. 

However, even with the relatively small structure, both men shouldn’t have been able to hear commotion within the throne room from 4 halls ahead. This was an immediate indication to Odysseus of how many women were already vying for his kingdom. 

Once the two men stood close enough to the throne room’s closed doors they were able to hear the muffled voices from before much more clearly. 

“What’s the hold up!?”

“We’ve been waiting for hours!” 

“Why can’t we find the King ourselves?!” 

They all sounded feminine. And very annoyed. 

“Ladies, please!” A man's voice, Polites’, called out from the other side of the doors. “The King will arrive in just a moment! So, in the meantime, why don’t we all conduct ourselves in a polite, orderly fashion?” 

A chorus of exasperated groans; if there were any words spoken then they were undecipherable due to the sheer loudness of the crowd. 

Odysseus saw Eurylochus toss him a look, one that had “I told you so” written all over it. 

Nevertheless Odysseus let out a deep breath, praying to the Gods above that he looked much more confident than he felt. With a nod to the other, Eurylochus made his way to the double doors of the throne room. 

He threw the doors open, attracting the attention of every guest within the throne room. Welcome or otherwise.

Eurylochus’ booming voice could be heard from every corner of the large room:

“Presenting His Majesty, Odysseus, King of Ithaca!” 

Everyone within the throne room, friend, suitor, or guard, either kneeled or bowed at the sight of the luminous King of Ithaca. 

Odysseus paid them no mind. He opted to stare straight ahead, looking at nothing in particular. He sat on the left throne, despite royal customs declaring he sit on the right. The right seat belonged to Penelope and Penelope only. 

He would make sure every suitor in his palace remembered this. 

Meanwhile on the opposite side of the room, while Odysseus prepared to address the crowd, Polites was slowly inching his way to Eurylochus’ side. Eurylochus did not notice the younger approaching him, only realizing when Polites had placed a hand on his shoulder. 

Polites gestured to the third member of their friend group, mouthing a silent “Is he okay?”. 

Eurylochus blanked, unsure of how he should answer, before opting to shrug his shoulders; Not necessarily disagreeing but not entirely agreeing either. 

Polites understood. Odysseus was somehow both managing and not. 

Polites couldn’t help but grow somber. He could sympathize, but never fully understand. He will never fully understand the pain his best friends shared when it came to the misfortune caused to them by the Trojan war. 

Polites was one of the lucky few spared of permanent injury on that fateful battle 13 years ago. Any wounds and scars he attained had long since faded, their only proof of existence reduced to mere memory. Meanwhile, Odysseus and Eurylochus had sustained injuries that would affect them for the rest of their lives. 

Odysseus and Eurylochus were also victims to the whims of the Gods, for the divine ordered their wives to war in their stead. How must it feel, to know the love of your life was forced to act as your replacement simply because you allowed yourself to be moved by premature pride? 

Even though it was painful to Eurylochus, Polities knew it was pure agony to Odysseus. He had lost both his younger sister and wife due to a rash victory party… 

Odysseus suddenly shot his best friends a look, silently indicating to them that he was ready for his speech. 

Polites and Euylochus stood straight and gave him their undivided attention. They were ready to lend him their support, regardless of the difficult decision he made. 

“Greetings, my friends.”  

Odysseus took mental note of the amount of women littering his throne room. 32 in total, so far.

“I am delighted to see so many new, cordial faces in our humble kingdom on this day,” 

The suitors weren’t stupid. They all knew Odysseus did not mean a word of what he was saying. He was just spouting flowery nonsense for the sake of appearances. 

However, it mattered not what he felt. All that mattered was his submission to the expectations of Greek royalty.  

That included his remarriage. 

“Now, let’s not beat around the bush.” Odysseus gave everyone an easy, nonchalant smile. “You all want to know who I will take as my new Queen.” 

That threw everyone for a loop. 

Those who knew Odysseus, his guards, servants, and slaves, were surprised at how readily he addressed the issue he tried so desperately to avoid. 

The suitors, along with their guards, were also shocked that he was willing to address the issue without hesitation. Were the rumors about him and his loyalty to his wife all false? 

Polites and Eurylochus, who had known Odysseus for practically their entire lives, couldn’t help but feel a semblance of worry with his words. Odysseus was not one to just give up so easily, especially in matters concerning his heart. 

Just what was he planning? 

Odysseus, for his part, did not betray a single one of his thoughts with that easy smile of his. He stood still, waiting for the commotion to cease, before once again speaking to the crowd. 

Polites and Eurylochus, along with one mysterious suitor, were the only ones to notice the mischievous glint in the King’s eyes. 

“However, in respect of honoring the deceased, I regret to inform you all that I can no longer discuss the matter anytime soon.” 

“WHAT!?” 

A chorus of angry voices were quick to make themselves known at the end of his declaration. Two or four voices quickly became 31, each one demanding to know why he couldn’t choose a new wife right then and there. 

Again only one of them was silent, leaning against the side of the wall with her arms crossed. She watched the King with an intense stare. 

Odysseus raised a single hand, prompting the angry voices to silence themselves. 

“As I was saying…” The King’s smile dropped, replaced with an expression of stoicism. “I plan to honor and respect my wife in death as I did in life. And so, in her memory, I will carve a wooden statue in the form of the late Queen. This will be done carefully and with precision, achieved by my hands and my hands only.” 

Another chorus of annoyed and angered groans sounded from the women. They all knew it was bound to take a long time before the statue was even close to completed. 

Eurylochus and Polities were a mixed bag of reactions, one impressed with the cunning of his friend and the other filled to the brim with worry. They both knew Odysseus was talented in the art of carving; As a symbol of his long-standing love to Penelope, he had made her a bridal bed from the inside of a long-lasting tree. However, that was before his injury to his arm. How long would it take, to carve out a wooden statue that could rightfully honor the beauty and grace of Penelope of Ithaca, all with a bad shoulder, a kingdom to run, and a child to raise? 

It was the perfect plan. 

Odysseus had been scheming ever since he heard talk of his “inevitable” remarriage. The king knew he had to delay choosing a new wife, if not for his fidelity and loyalty to Penelope then for the sake of his daughter. 

Who knows what would happen to her if he remarries, for what Queen would allow the daughter of her predecessor to take the throne? 

No, he needed to be smart and tactical about this. He needed to use the gifts of quick-thinking and feeling calm under pressure bestowed to him by Athena. Telemachas was already 13, well on her way to 14. All he had to do was keep his suitors at bay for a few more years, until the Princess was deemed ready to be Queen. Then Telemachas would be allowed to ascend to the throne without any complaints from his adversaries. 

This statue was the perfect excuse. He will spend as much time as he needed carving it, forever if he had to. 

He could do this. He will find a way. For himself. For Telemachas. For Penelope. 

~

Odysseus was so caught up in his thoughts he didn’t notice how one of his suitors was looking at him. She stared at him quietly, intensely, glaring at him from the moment he walked into the throne room. 

She couldn’t look away from his body. His tanned, toned, delicious body. She noticed the way Odysseus’ chiton stuck to his waist, showing off his firm, fit figure. 

When he lifted his hand to silence the crowd, the fabric of his clothing was forced to rise up; his naked body, only briefly displayed, was shown to anyone standing at a certain angle. She was the one lucky enough to stand at this angle. 

She could see his torso from where she stood. She saw his v-line fade into his abdomen, some single stray beads of sweat drip down in that path. She saw a set of prominent abs, mild but still very much there, that shuddered with each breath he took. And finally, before he lowered his arm and his torso was covered once more, she was able to see his pectorals in full view. They were flat, but still round; oh, what must it feel like to take a bite of that flesh, to watch as the man underneath was fully marked and claimed?

There was no doubt about it. He was beautiful. He was perfect. 

He was hers. 

Based on what he just declared, accompanied by rumors circulating the palace, it appeared that he planned to make his remarriage a difficult process for his suitors. 

That was fine.

She can be patient. 

No matter how long it took she’d find a way to force him to accept her, even if she had to hold him down and take him by force.

After all, she was blessed by Zeus himself. Though not his child, and by definition having no divine blood, one would be forgiven for assuming differently based on her ability to look forever young despite her age. The King of Gods gave her this gift, saying he knew her to be a kindred spirit. 

The point was anything and everything she ever wanted would belong to her.  

Ithaca. 

The Right Throne. 

Odysseus.

No matter what it took, no matter what she had to do, one day all of it will bear her name. 

Calypso.

[urbestestwindgod]

tw for discussion of rape and all and a hot take i guess

ok i dont rlly like to get serious or anything on this blog but i just wanted to mention that even if it was left up for interpretation if calypso raped odysseus or not, the stuff she still does isnt okay. like she still holds him captive, she still harasses and tries to coerce him after knowing that he is married and doesnt want her. she holds him captive KNOWING IT MAKES HIM SUICIDAL. thats not haha girly things that called being an abuser. yes, holding someone captive and trying to manipulate them out of suicide (as opposed to support them) is abusive.

i know she has a pretty voice but like, did you think jorge would cast a random untrained smoker from an opium den to play her so we know that this isnt a good character? and also you can compliment people’s designs of calypso without being ok with rape, because its just a design, but when its “shes my wifey” and “ii love her” its suddenly not like any other epic villain simping because the thing is she isnt a god sinking his ships or lighting bolting his crew to death; shes sexually abusing him (i am also not going to debate if sexual harassment is different from sexual abuse because its not. even if she never raped him she was still trying to coerce him and harassed him; which is abusive)

if there’s anything i dont fuck with its sexual misconduct. rape, harassment, abuse, all of it. dont give me that shit. the only thing that irritates me more than “haha id dropkick that child in self defense” is any victim blaming or pro rape statement that i displeasurably have to hear. like back to “her voice is so pretty” or just “shes so pretty” hey yea thats what most male rape victims are told. that she was so hot though, so he must have liked it. shes not “just a girl” shes an abuser.

now i know people where a little peeved that jorge removed rape from the circe saga; but i think its reasonable why he did. the epic community is very connected and always has memes for the situations odysseus is in. which, when its haha his friend was killed by a cyclops, or his crew was killed by an angry father, or his men where turned to pigs, or haha hes sad at whatever fantastical situation hes put in; we can laugh at it. because not only is it not real because its a story, but also no one has ever been through that. no ones ever faced off a cyclops in a cave before.

but people have been raped. men have been raped and heard the whole “shes so pretty and sweet thoo”. thats real. and with the circe saga jay knew that putting in rape, so early in too, that it wouldn’t be a plotpoint that fit in because that isnt an epic misfortune they face! thats a real situation; not the men to pigs and sea witch stuff, but being pressured and coerced into sleeping with someone? that is a real situation that real people are put in.

and i know male sexual assaults are iffy to people somehow. so lets say that a woman was in odysseus’ place and circe/calypso were men. does that make it worse? because both are bad. i dont fuck with rape towards ANYONE. regardless of gender, i dont think in 2024 we still should be debating is men can be raped

but back to jorge; i think he was brave for making love in paradise go how it did. i think even implying rape was a brave choice for the musical; especially with a very unserious and jokey fandom (not saying its not also serious but still) but even if you interpret that calypso never touched him. in the odyssey she did, and how tf do you LIKE a character who in the source material was a rapist? shes not “allowed to do bad” shes not “just a girl” shes a predator, and idn something about seeing her get support despite that reminds me of people like my uncle, my brother, my friend’s stepdad, a classmate or two. my uncle being able to have a restaurant, my brother having “a bright future” a certain classmate who got a girl pregnant and then went on to go to prep school. while she carried a child from a random guy in another state. you can support and joke about poseidon from epic and all, but when you start talking about calypso the same way you aren’t invalidating odysseus because hes not real. but you are invalidating countless real life victims.

and these are bold words from someone who isnt even mad about zeus of all people, because i know the culture he was from and i know that he was a metaphor/symbol to said culture. but the odyssey was a story with characters who survived by virtue of extending past that cultural bias. i can pull away from the odyssey as a piece of its time and understand that calypso wasnt probably seen as a rapist back then because the term didnt apply, but as a character i hate her like i hate theseus

and i know calypso was technically a goddess but that didnt mean much for her except immortality and being able to sexually abuse better. she wasnt worshipped (to my knowledge?) or exactly metaphorical. and epic is a modern retelling; so modern standards apply; shes a predator. i wont be taking any counter points because like i said dont do me with that shit

tl;dr your support for fictional rapists extends to what real victims have gone through, and check your lust because backing up every pretty voice/face is a rape culture classic

also im not saying that if you like calypso youre a pro rape asshole, dont think that. but i am saying youre not helping anyone and more hurting than anything by treating a character who is a sexual abuser like just another fantasy villain

[thathalguy]

Yall I'm going kinda theory-insane over here.

I was watchin some EPIC: the Musical reaction/analysis content cause I found a couple guys I enjoyed and went on a little binge watch, as you do. (Mortius and CF Reacts if you wanna check em out)

They're watching the livestreamed animatic of Thunder Bringer and during the part where Odysseus hears Penelope singing to him Mortius pauses and says something about the vision of Penelope that catches my interest. He says Jorge has posted some info about this moment in his Patreon-exclusive channel on the Discord about what this Penelope illusion actually is, but because it's something only shared for Jorge's Patreon supporters he won't say it outright. In another video they're reacting to Neal Illustrator's Thunder Bringer animatic and again in this scene he mentions this Patreon-exclusive knowledge "The yellow. Is this Zeus to him? I know that's not canon." which just sends my little theory brain spiralling.

So I've been mulling it over for a few days and I've thrown some ideas at my wife, sharing my thoughts which I'm gonna share with yall now.

Upon first watching the livestream I thought the illusion of Penelope was made by Zeus to make Odysseus more torn between his choices. Y'know, toying with the mortal kind of thing. But if it's not Zeus, then who's making Odysseus see Penelope in the sky? Let's look at how she appears in the animatic.

A gap in the storm, illuminated in yellow light. She looks like the sun breaking through the clouds. And who in the canon animatics is tied to yellow besides Zeus? Apollo. Who wears a sun-shaped earring because he's the SUN god.

"But the sun god is Helios!" you might be saying, and you're right. Depending on the storyteller, Helios OR Apollo is the sun god. And when they're on the sun god's island, they never actually name WHICH sun god it is. Eurylochus says "this statue, the god of the sun, don't know where its from" implying that the statue could be either one. And the story of Helios's cows being killed by Odysseus's crew is also attributed to Apollo's cows.

"Another story is in Homer's Odyssey where Odysseus and his men, despite Zeus' warning, devour Apollo's herd."

Now, why would Apollo be showing Odysseus his wife in this moment? That's where my theorizing comes in, and full disclaimer: I'm notoriously bad at getting my theories right, so who knows if I'm even close. But this is what I've come up with as Apollo's reasoning.

Apollo would have known the crew was on his island talking about killing his cows. He's literally the sun, he sees a lot from up there, and Odysseus is tied to his statue, which could also be used as a way to listen in and keep watch over the herd. He would have heard Odysseus begging the crew not to kill the cows, to not anger the gods, and when Eurylochus kills it anyway, of course there's going to be consequences. But Apollo knows it's not Odysseus's fault, he was wounded, tied up, and at the mercy of a mutiny, he couldn't do anything to stop it beyond his words. Wouldn't you have a little sympathy for the man trying to keep your cows safe and unharmed?

And let's also touch on the fact that Apollo's argument in God Games seems pretty weak and unimportant. He's upset some sirens are dead, and he gives in pretty easily, hardly any reluctance or hesitation. As the sun god surely he'd be much angrier about his cattle being slaughtered, right? But Odysseus was the only one who was trying NOT to kill the cow. He's the first challenge, Level One, and by presenting such a shallow (ha) issue, he's allowing Athena an easy victory toward her goal. Also he calls him Ody, not Odysseus.

By showing Odysseus his wife, Apollo swayed his decision to have Zeus kill the crew, the ones who actually did wrong.

[missadangel]

Little Bird in a Cage (Javier Peña x Reader)

Part 2 -Kidnapped Again-

Gifs by dinjarring - perotovar - djo

---------------------------- All episodes here ------------------------

The days continued to pass in the same monotonous way, but finally something new had happened. You were now allowed to walk inside the building. To being a good girl, Javi said.

So what it really meant was that you didn't try to escape anymore.

Fucking asshole.

The building was like an old military guesthouse, 2 flat with high and wide hallways, probably having more than 20 rooms. Javi and the others staying in these rooms, but spending their most time in the common area. In this area there was a TV, radio, 3 seater couch, and lots of ashtrays. Cigarette smoke was everywhere, even from a distance you could smell it.

On instinct you thought more than once how you could escape from the building, but it was almost impossible. The soldiers were everywhere.

You were tired of even thinking about it, so just wanted to let it go for now.

----

One morning when you left the room and went downstairs, Chris and Daniel were discussing something, there were a lot of photos and folders in front of them. It was like the case files the cops were going through.

Your eyes looked for Javi and as you looked around, noticed that he was talking on the phone -that you tried to call your father couple times but failed- a little further away, he noticed you immediately, but he lift the phone receiver up making gesture like saying “hey”.

You responded with a half smile and then he turned around, oh you wished he hadn't, he looked much more attractive from behind.

The tight jeans he was wearing showed off his great ass. Suddenly you realized that you flushed and you turned around afraid to caught by him. This kinda thoughts were getting into your head a lot lately and you cursed yourself for not being able to control it.

You looked at the photo Daniel holding.

"This is my house," you said quickly.

Daniel and Chris looked at each other.

"Yes, senorita," Daniel said, "well we..."

"It's okay, I know you followed me, didn’t mean to interrupt you guys," you said, but again someone's face looked very familiar in the photos.

"It's Jorge," you said surprisingly, and this time your voice rang like a silver bell all of the hallway.

Daniel and Chris looked at you curiously.

"Do you know him?"

You slowly nodded your head yes, but you were also worried about Jorge, as far as you knew he was a good guy.

"Okay, keep me posted.” Javi said before he hung up the phone and hurried coming close to you.

"Jorge is a good guy why do you have his photo?" you asked almost mumbling.

"Y/N, how do you know him?" Javi crossed his arms and sat on the arm of the couch where Daniel was sitting on.

You looked up at him, his brown eyes looking at you piercingly, you felt a little like you were being interrogated by this former agent.

"He came to our house a few times, he was nice to me, but, my dad used to talk to him in private. I have no idea what they were talking about but you're not going to do anything to him are you?"

When Javi saw you tense up, he sit beside you. There was a strange excitement in his eyes, but his piercing gaze was back and torturing you again.

"Of course nothing will happen, he's important for us like Cali's KGB," the honesty in his voice was palpable. "He's actually contacted us, but we're not sure if we can trust him yet or not."

"You can, I don't think he would lie, but of course I can't be sure, no one can be trusted these days anymore."

The sarcasm in your voice made Javi roll his eyes, he stood up but eyes locked on you again thinking about something.

"We were supposed to meet him tomorrow," Chris said, "after Gilberto, sir, this might be our only chance to catch his brother."

"Okay, let's do it," Javi said, can't stop smiling at your stubborn attitude though.

Chris and Daniel walked outside in a hurry.

“By the way,” Javi put his hands on waist.

"I'm going to see your dad tomorrow," he finally said.

You were excited for a moment, but then feeling down again, knowing that you wouldn't be able to see him.

"If I asked you to take me with you, you wouldn't, would you?" you asked desperately.

Javi shook his head as no.

"But soon you’re gonna see him again, I promise."

"I hope you keep your promise, Javi," you said without looking at him.

"I believe that we can get along with him," he said sincerely.

As he was about to leave, he plucked a red rose from the ivy that grew from outside through the window.

"Just hang in there little bird, you’ll be free soon" gives you the rose, he winking at you and walked out with that wonderful smile of his.

“’lll try,” smelling the rose he gave you.

It was weird that you can't get mad at him anymore.

---

As soon as Javi left the minister's office, he went downstairs and lit a cigarette. He had just been rewarded for the successful capture of Gilberto Rodriguez. As he enjoyed his cigarette, happy with his victory, he thought of you. He was happy that he was going to keep his promise, but there was something he has to do first.

As he walked into the DEA building, everyone who saw him was congratulating and cheering.

Agent Javier Peña is back.

After getting his gun and badge, he stayed there for a while to celebrate with Chris and Daniel over a drink.

Then when everyone there insisted on going to the bar, he couldn't resist them. They were all quite happy, celebrating and laughing, but also aware that they were just getting started. Javi was close to getting drunk when he saw a familiar face. He was wellknown at this bar so he knew almost all the waitresses.

"Javi," one of the girls said, put her tray on the table and wrapping her arms around his neck.

"Why don't we celebrate this together, like the old days," she smirked. "You haven't forgotten the wonderful moments we had, have you?"

When she reached up to kiss him, Javi stopped her and gently lifted her arms around his neck and pushed her away.

"Not tonight, sweetheart," he winked.

"Wow, normally you wouldn't say no to that, but whatever," she said and picked up the tray and move behind the bar, looking quite upset. All Javi could think about right now was you, and maybe this was the first time he'd ever missed an opportunity for sex.

------

By the time you were getting ready for bed, you wondered what was taking Javi so long, why he wouldn’t come, however you were tired of thinking and wanted to go to sleep.

When you pulled the cover of bed, you realized that a piece of paper had been pushed under the door. It was a letter.

With so many questions running through your head, your first thought was to open the door and look into the hallway. But no one was there.

You opened the letter in a hurry and curiously.

"You will see your father tonight, be ready."

Your heart raced, hands shaking. "What in the world,” you said to yourself.

Who could have sent it? Your first thought was Javi, but why would he write a letter?

No, it was probably someone else. But who. What if it was a trap? The possibilities were many, but time was short.

Who could you tell about this?

Finally you open the door slowly, looked down the corridor, the soldiers were still walking around. Was it one of them? You thought of calling Javi, but the soldiers were downstairs, watching over the phone specially because you had tried to call your father several times before.

You went back to the room and closed the door slowly, you body starting to shake. Was your father specially sending troops with the support of the army? Could it be?

"What should I do, what should I do,"  said to yourself as wondered if there was a traitor among the soldiers. Well, he or she wasn't a traitor to you, of course, but still, you couldn't trust anyone.

You get super impatient, opened the door of the room quietly again and looking around. It didn't feel right to wait quietly, so you wanted to try your best.

The soldiers were coming and going, two by two, counting how long it takes, and you had about 30 seconds to get yourself out somehow. Without thinking too much, you tiptoed down the corridor once the soldiers were on the other side. As soon as you heard the footsteps you hid behind the couch, and by the time they turned around for another round you had made it out. This was different from the last time you tried to escape. This time you didn't know what you were running from or where.

This was so stupid of you but you couldn't just sit and wait.

The soldiers outside were talking about something among themselves. This was good for you, first wanted to go to Don Berna who you believed was Javi's ally, can help you. Yes, he is the one who helped him to kidnap you too, but you had no choice, you trusted Javi, you trusted him to take you to your father one way or another.

It was just something doesn't right with that note.

You weren't sure where Don Berna was staying or even if he was here now, but you had to try. When you move forward you accidentally stepped on a piece of broken glass, fuck, then someone grabbed you from behind.

“What do we have here?”

A soldier grabbed your arm roughly, cocky smile on his face.

"I wasn't running away, really," you tried to convince him. "If you take me to Don Berna, I want to tell him--"

“Move,” he jerking your arm roughly heading to the dark green tent out front.

As soon as you entered the tent, you were shocked to see the commander pointing a gun at Don Berna's face. All the soldiers were also pointing their guns at the other men. You were confused, but this made you panicked even more.

"Ah, senorita, you couldn't wait, could you?" the commander laughed looking at you, without moving his hand.

"Fuckin motherfucker, I paid you generously, what the fuck is this? We had an agreement for fucks sake."

"I'm sorry Mr. Berna, but Miguel Rodriguez offered 5 times what you paid for this girl. So what could i do? we're mercenaries, right guys?"

All the soldiers nodded smirking.

"Yes, sir."

"And I have no faith in that fucking agent Peña to do what he promised," he added.

"Miguel Rodriguez? But note you sent to my room were saying im gonna see my father," you yelled at him.

"If only you had waited in your room like you were told, senorita, you wouldn't have seen this part and you would keep thinking you were going to see your father, but what the hell, you'll suffer the consequences. What the fuck are you waiting for? Get her on the fuckin helicopter now!" he ordered his soldiers.

"No, let go," you screamed with all your might, but you were dragged into the helicopter anyway.

It was the second time this happening, you were kidnapping again, but this time you were more afraid of where you were going. You wished you could lost your consciousness again.

As tears falling down your cheeks, thinking about Javi, you would rather he kidnaps you instead.

-----

“FUCK!!!”

When Javi returned to the military base, he was so angry when he find out. He clenching his fists and banging them against the wall wanted to smash everything close.

He had never felt so angry and helpless. 

"We'll find her," Chris said, trying to calm him down.

Daniel added.

"So yes, you're officially an agent now, we can use all our powers to find her. Right?"

"Sure, lemme call the headquarters," Chris run towards to phone.

"We'll back you up," Don Berna said. "I'll do anything to end Cali. Motherfuckers. Miguel made a fool out of me, the fucking cartel king."

He spitting with anger while talking.

Javi walked inside without saying anything, all he could think about as he lit his cigarette was you, he had promised that you wouldn't get hurt, but how was he going to keep that promise now?

As the thoughts raced through his head looked at the red roses and promised to himself.

"I will find you and bring you back little bird, no matter what.”

-------

It was around 3 a.m. when the helicopter approached the helicopter landing area of a large mansion.

Armed men were everywhere, all dressed in civilian clothes, unlike the soldiers, but they all had guns just like them.

As soon as the helicopter landed, the commander grabbed you by the arm and pulled you. He helped you step down and kept pulling you towards a tall man in a suit waiting in the courtyard of the mansion.

"Here, sir, I brought her."

He pushed you forward towards the man. Fucking bastard.

The man in the suit clapped his hands happily.

"Great, now pay the commander and his unit and send them on their way,”

He made hand gesture to his men. “And you,” he looked at you.

“You come with me honey," he said calmly but commanding.  

Unlike the commander, the man didn't grab your arm, he offered his hand for you to take.

"My hand waiting, honey," he said in a threatening tone.

You had to take this stranger's hand even if this disgusts you, but of course you had a guess. This must be the man they called Miguel.

He began to introduce himself as he escorted you inside.

"I'm Miguel, and this is my personal living space, it's a bit of an insult to call it home, you understand right," he laughed to himself.

He was promoting the house like a real estate agent which was super weird.

"And you, sweet Y/N, welcome. You know, your father and I are kind of close friends."

"Then take me to my father." your voice was louder than you wanted it to be.

Miguel stopped and looked at you and you felt a shiver run down your spine. Because this man was looking calm and very threatening at the same time.

"Sweet Y/N, you're going to have to stay here for a while, until we work things out with your father, do you understand? hm?"

"Besides," he continued as he opened a door with golden ornaments on it," whatever you wanti your needs, will be done here, don't worry."

"I've heard that before," you muttered.

He laughed at your reaction.

"One more thing," said Miguel raising his indexfinger just like trying to warn you.

Also with one hand he brushes your hair which was in mess because of the helicopter ride.

Man, this motherfucker likes to touch.

"If you try to betray me, intent to leave or sneak out and somehow get to your friends from DEA, then you no longer will be my friend's daughter, but instead, you will be the most worthless person in the world to me, okay?"

He put his hands on your shoulder now which disgusts you badly. Looks like he wants to be sure about you understand him clearly. You gulped and nodded.

"Great! Good girl," he clapped his hands again.

"Good night, sweetie."

When the door closed your body collapsed on the floor, feeling exhausted, this night consumed you badly.

"Jesus! What a nightmare!"

----------------------------- All episodes here ------------------------

[batsplat]

I know need to know what the fuck was the honda three rider team about. Bc that sounds made up as fuck

historical silly season: 2010 edition!

in early 2010, casey had very much had enough of ducati

rumours are that he'd already been looking to break his contract for the 2010 season after how ducati had handled the whole mystery illness 2009 saga... releasing inaccurate statements about his condition to the press without his consent, implying his diet was to blame - as well as offering jorge a shit ton of money to come ride for them. crucially more than they were paying casey

this was from mid 2009 and the vibes were already BAD back then... it's hard to know how seriously to take retirement rumours from the time given casey just wasn't. really... talking to the press, so a lot of the times the media was relying on other sources from inside his camp or just wildly speculating

anyway, casey did see out the 2010 season with ducati, but at the start of the year he essentially gave them an ultimatum - he wanted them to rip up his proposed contract and have them show him how much he was worth to them. they did not do so

according to casey, he already signed a contract at the second round of the season in jerez, which gives you a sense of how done he was with all things ducati - but it was only announced after the seventh round in july. the move was made smoother by casey's existing close relationship with livio suppo, who had himself recently made the switch from ducati to honda

very much the right time to make the move for sure. at the time, there was speculation that casey's poor results in the first half of the season was due to decreased motivation, which of course he strongly denied. really, it was the fault of the bike and team - and casey would show as much the following year at honda

one little problem. honda already had two factory contracted riders for 2011: dani and dovi. now, dani had been honda's wunderkind since forever, and after their last world champ nicky hayden - who was not on particularly warm terms with dani's camp, it has to be said - departed the team, dovi had been the chosen replacement. dovi was a long time honda loyalist, even when he was riding their underpowered bikes to championship runner up positions against jorge in 250cc, and he'd also had a highly impressive rookie season

2009 had not been a particularly great year for either factory honda rider, partly due to bike performance partly due to injuries partly due to... rider performance. it was a rough year for dovi in particular, despite his win in tricky conditions at donington (all four aliens deliver quite funny performances at that race in different ways. not exactly the finest of hours for any of them)

when casey's signing was announced, honda initially went 'okay three factory blokes but maybe we'll have two in the real team and then one in a fake team'

the problem, right, is that it costs a lot of money to field a three man team - this is why honda was so keen on the red bull option, because then they could pay for the seat

honda confirmed its intention to have four factory honda riders in 2011, those three and sic, in mid-september. but they still needed to figure out where to put them. they didn't manage to get the funds to put casey in a separate team, and then they tried to put dovi on the satellite squad:

now, dovi was on a 2+1 contract, with 2009-10 guaranteed and an option to extend for another year. the contract included a performance clause - and dovi was having a more successful 2010 season, so hrc was having some trouble forcing dovi to accept the move:

so yeah, obviously not exactly great behaviour to sign a third rider when your team is already essentially full... and then immediately spend the next few months trying to get rid of one of your existing riders who is still entitled to that seat

some more details:

for a while, dovi looked like he might be leaning towards accepting it, and was certainly keen to stress that he wasn't rejecting gresini due to his interpersonal issues with some of the team's personnel. this from september:

eventually, repsol agreed to fund the whole thing so that honda could honour their commitments to all three riders:

so, one team for all of them, if still a wee bit of healthy internal separation

and by november the whole thing was sorted

honda did have some internal precedent for this! in 1997, they fielded three factory riders: doohan, criville and okada

also back in the day they did just create shell teams organised around one rider, which is of course where valentino spent his first two years in the premier class

and here's the updated version from 2011!

anyway, it was only something honda was willing to do for one year, and in the end dovi decided to jump ship to yamaha rather than accept internal demotion. the fight for p3 in the championship went right down to the final race in valencia - and it must have been incredibly satisfying for dovi to snatch it from dani there

after this... look, basically they changed the rules to make it two entries at most per team, then they changed it back for like? two years? so that four riders were technically allowed. and then they changed their mind again. now it's just two - obviously teams are allowed wildcards, but they couldn't do this three man team thing anymore nowadays

teams generally wouldn't even want to do this because it's a lot of hassle and, most importantly, money. so yeah, unlikely to make a comeback. very much a quirky curio that won't be replicated... could be funny though. if they want to change the rules again

[bravelittleocelot]

Honestly I wanna ramble some more cuz I'm so excited for vengeance and I heard love in paradise and gods games again, and I just,,,,,, I don't think I've actually rambled about my interpretation of love in paradise much outside of calling out the racism im noticing,,, so I'm going to do that now and then I'll stop posting for a bit cuz I need to lmao

this got long so I'm putting it under a cut, last chance to not read this. if you just want to argue with me about it just scroll by or block me. I'm not here to change anyones mind or argue I just want to talk about how I interpret the songs. Please don't bring up how you think she raped him on this post.

I think that both Calypso and Ody went through those seven years literally like, that bus meme LMAO. But I still think they developed in really interesting ways too (for better and worse). like,,, when we first meet Her we meet this goddess who has no idea how to exist with another person, she dismisses everything Ody says, she seems to view him closer to a pet than anything else (one way to interpret why she does this is because up until now she's had animals and inanimate objects to keep her company? If what I'm gathering from not sorry for loving you is right she was just fuckin left there) but by the end of the song she's pleading for him to listen to her. She's calling him Ody - he doesn't tell her his name in the start of the song (and as much as I like the theory that he repeats the things his friends have said to him in his sleep, I prefer the idea he did introduce himself at some point) and I think it really does feel like she's listening to what he's saying but she has no idea how to handle it. Like, even if we do use the "she still sees him as a pet" interpretation, your pet becomes suicidal, wtf are you gonna do? If my cat went to a cliff and started screaming about me not knowing what he's done and gone through I wouldn't know what the fuck to say either. I don't think she's trying to seduce him off the cliff (and I think it's super weird people make it out that's what happens!) I think she's literally on her knees begging the only person she's ever known to come back to her so that she can help him,,,, she doesn't help him, obviously, she triggers the fuck out of him but by god she's trying!!! lmfaooo.

....actually I guess Ody is more a golden retriever but you hear me.

Anyway

She's an antagonist for a reason, she literally cannot understand why keeping him captive there is wrong. I still don't think she rapes him, but I do think it took her a long time to understand he has boundaries. and I think "and if I pushed you/ came on too strong" etc in not sorry for loving you shows us, she, still, can't understand why what she did was bad after all this time, she was just trying to love him in the way she wanted to be loved. and that is, honestly, terrifying and heartbreaking all at the same time.

as a side tangent, Because we know Jorge loves to use wordplay (look how he used double meanings during Suffering) when she sings "Under my spell, we're stuck in paradise. No one can come or go, my island stays unknown" you can for sure take that to mean "under my Curse, we're stuck here Together", and tbh I feel like that's backed up in what I've heard of Not Sorry For Loving you? She's, for sure trapped him, im not arguing that, but she's stuck there too. I don't have a point here cuz imo it doesn't actually make her anything other than more tragic and more of an antagonist cuz girl you KNOW what it's like to be stuck there, it might be paradise but you said it yourself you're!! stuck!! Jorge uses his words so carefully (at least 98% of the time), she's not just casually saying stuck imo!! Actually maybe I do have a point cuz imo that makes it even more interesting!! Like, no wonder she doesn't want to let him go!! He's the only person she's ever met and probably the only person she ever will meet!! "My island stays unknown"!! Selfishly, there's no fucking way she'd let him go without divine intervention!! Scary!!! UGH I love this, it's so tasty and complicated and!! That makes a good antagonist!!! She's great I love her 10/10 mr jorge this is a GREAT version and I will marry her.

And Ody,,,,,,,

God where do I even begin with Ody. I said before that I think the worst part of this for him was to be reminded of Polites every fucking day for seven years. Because lets be real, she might be Coping but she calls her own prison a paradise, she greeted him with open arms and greets her world with open arms (lmao and he becomes her world.... im not crying much its fine) . And like, there are a few ways to view that last bit of the song cuz she IS repeating things from the people he loved most, he could've been talking in his sleep and she's trying to use familiar phrasing or she could just be, yknow, Like This. and personally I love the idea that Ody was faced with someone who reflected all the pieces of the people he loved back to him, everyone except!! his wife!! She reflects the words of his mom, the strength of Eury, the open arms of Polites.... and my GOD would that be torture on top of being trapped. I said it before, there's three people on that island, Ody, Caly, and the intense!! guilt!! Ody feels!! And she makes it worse!! He's trapped, and he can't even escape the people he failed because she constantly reminds him of them (accidentally but still, constant).

but like he says in not sorry for loving you ( and I do not want to hear a fucking word about Stockholm syndrome this is my post and I'm putting my foot down) he loves her. cuz again, of course he loves her, how could he not love someone who reminds him of all the best parts of the people he loves. It's not romantic, it's not in the way she wants to be loved, It's probably incredibly painful, he for sure also hates her, but they spent seven years together. Seven years of existing together isn't something to sneeze at!! No matter what happened, there had to be Moments. Moments that gave him some sort of peace because otherwise he would've been on that cliff before the year was up.

And speaking of that??? What did he say to her all these years. That's what I want to know. Cuz despite me calling bullshit on sir yaps a lot NOT telling her about what happened to him, can we talk about

You don't know what I've gone through You don't know what I've sacrificed Every comrade I long knew Every friend, I saw them die And all I hear are screams

cuz what if!! she doesn't know!!! what if this whole time he tried to just talk about them like they were still alive or focus in on getting home to his wife and as he lost hope he stopped speaking so much, kept seeing her act like the people he loved, kept watching her try and love him in all the wrong ways, and kept the demons and guilt at bay until he just broke???

Also? again, the pet thing, if we want to go there.... if your golden retriever burst out with "ALL MY FRIENDS DIED" what the fuck would YOU do.... sorry im coping with humour, ANYWAY.

idk like, I just feel like there's so much to unpack here and I hope we DO get a little backstory on their lives together, I want to see people explore this in more ways than what I've seen. Cuz I think he connected to her, I think he understands that she's trapped there too, I don't think this makes it better but I think it enriches the story and it gives them such a cool dynamic.

Anyway this is long enough, it's late and I'm having many thoughts. Again if you don't agree with me that's ok just scroll on, I'm just yelling at the void

[fandomzwriterk]

Smoke and Mirrors

Pairings: Tomas Vrbada/Smoke x OC

Warnings: slight gore + Amnesiac!OC + religious trauma (?) + characters dying + hinted innuendos later on + Kuai & Bi Han trying to be good brothers + Liu Kang as a dad figure (?) + Tomas just being his sweet lovable self + Bi Han being kind of a dick + Kuai Liang having no clue what it’s like to have a sister + confused “brother” Kuai Liang (?) + Raiden, Kung Lao, Johnny, and Kenshi being simps (mostly Raiden) + MASSIVE Angel lore drop

Pt: 8/?

A/N: this chapter is brought to you by its theme song, Warrior of the Mind!!

This world was not quite what Angel expected. It was beautiful, colors more vibrant than a rainbow and as calm as a river in spring. There were so many things gaining her attention, even the people around her scared her. Angel felt outmatched in physicality, she needed to blend in. Angel of course had her wings retracted, not going to let anything make her show her wings while she was here. Her job was to protect the Champions with Tomas, make sure everything was safe. But why did the feeling of missing something feel stronger as she walked?

“They do not disappiont.” Johnny spouted

“We are Earthrealm's ambassadors, Johnny. We'll show them respect... not unwanted attention.” Raiden replied

The woman in pink who stood next to another woman in blue walked toward Angel, her mask covering her identity much like Angel and the Lin Kuei Brothers.

“Lord Liu Kang, welcome.”

“Thank you, Princess Mileena.” He answered with a bow

“You remember my sister?” she asked as her head turned to the woman in blue

“Of course. Princess Kitana. May I introduce Johnny Cage, Kung Lao, Kenshi Takahashi and Earthrealm's champion... Raiden.”

Mileena looked to Raiden, then looking to see who else was here. Her eyes settled on Angel, then moving her attention to Kitana. Kitana’s eyes went to Angel, seeming to burn her gaze into Angel’s skin.

“I hope you're prepared, Raiden. Our champions are determined to win.” Kitana replied

“None more so than me. It's been too long since we've known victory.” Mileena added looking to her sister

Everyone followed, but Angel felt something was watching her. Tomas knew it too, he felt her unease at where they were

“You okay?”

“I’m fine. I’m just… nervous I guess.”

“Nervous? Angel you know you’re not the one fighting right?”

“I know it’s just… I feel like I’m supposed to feel nervous, like there’s something here waiting for me.”

“I’m sure you’ll figure it out my friend.”

Angel took a deep breath, closing her eyes for a second. There was definitely something waiting for her here. As both her and Tomas started to walk, the Princess Kitana walked up to them, making them stop dead in their tracks.

“You two come this way.”

Angel and Tomas followed as she lead them through a few side paths and eventually through some gardens. Kitana looked back at Angel, quickly looking ahead as she brought them both to an open room where there sat three thrones. She instructed both Angel and Tomas where they would be during the tournaments, both watching from front and center as the champions fought each other.

“This sounds like a good time to learn some things.”

Angel only nodded, her eyes following Kitana went to sit on a throne, and soon enough all of the group were there too. Mileena sat on the throne opposite to Kitana, the middle throne the largest and the highest. Soon enough, people started to pour into the room as well, everyone waiting for the Empress to join them. Angel felt uncomfortable, slowly leaning into Tomas as her closest hand gripped the side of his top, almost making her knuckles white. Tomas looked down a little, seeing his friend scared for her life. He quickly put an arm around the back of her head, playfully scratching at her scalp. She started to smile a little as the Empress finally came walking.

“Hey. It’s okay. I’m right here.” He whispered next to her ear

“Ready for battle there Raiden?” The Empress asked

“I am.” He answered with pride

Soon enough, there was a commotion, someone walking into the room followed behind the Constable that Kitana told Angel about. It wasn’t the Constable that got her attention, no no no, it was the person who lead her in. Their raven hair fell to the side and a little over their eyebrows, amber eyes staring at the Constable in what seemed like a prideful essence. This was someone who worked under the Constable but knew his place in order. Soon enough, Angel blinked, and then another guard came to stand next to the raven haired man, this one with dirty blonde hair and green eyes. He was slightly shorter than the first man, whispering something to each other.

“I-I…”

“Angel? What’s wrong?”

“Empress Sindel!”

Angels shout startled the whole room, even Kitana and Mileena, Empress Sindel looking at the small girl with curious eyes. Kitana stood up and ran to her mother, whispering something in her ear. It was only a few seconds before Empress Sindel’s face changed to something of sadness yet caring.

“Everyone, step aside. I want to see this girl for my own eyes.”

Tomas let her go reluctantly, backing away like everyone else as they all made a huge half circle around Angel while she stood in the center.

“E-Empress Sindel I need to ask something of someone in this room?”

Kitana nodded, Empress Sindel looking at Angel up and down before gesturing for her to speak. Angel walked forward two steps, turning to her right to stare at the two men she had noticed earlier. Everyone in the room was confused, even Liu Kang, and he was a God.

“I need to know…” she muttered as she picked her head up to stare at them.

She could see their amber and green eyes staring at her, feeling a weight on her as she opened her mouth to speak, but only one word came out…

“Y-Yuriel?”

The one with amber eyes looked as if something amazing had happened before his eyes. The one with green looked between both Angel and the man next to him.

“Azriel?” The one with raven hair asked

Angel felt as if everything came crashing down onto her, she felt herself gasp, hand clutching her heart as if the weight of the world fell on her shoulders. She felt herself let tears fall, letting them hit the marble floor as both men ran to her. Angel ran to them as well, embracing both in a hug, both men crying with Angel as well.

“You remembered.” The one with raven hair spoke

“We’ve missed you sister.” The dirty blonde man added

Angel’s vision blurred as her tears fell, collapsing to the ground on her knees while both boys clung to her as well.

“Michael…” Angel answered as she looked at the other boy

While she he put a hand on the side of his face, the boy named Michael grabbed it as both him and the other named Yuriel buried themselves in the hug.

“My brothers… you’re my brothers.” Angel cried

“Yes Azriel, we are.” Yuriel answered with tears in his eyes

Angel looked to behind her, seeing Tomas smile at her and her brothers, noticing Liu Kang and Kuai Liang nodding to each other. Raiden and Kung Lao looked at each other, then looking to the rest of their friends.

“I knew who you were before you even introduced yourself.” Angel heard behind her

She spun around, seeing Kitana slowly walking towards her, kneeling to be on the ground with her.

“Yuriel talks a lot about you… how much he’s missed you. How much he and Michael missed you. They’ve been waiting for so long, and I’m happy you’re here too.” Kitana added as she embraced Angel in a hug.

“Empress Sindel, may I take my leave with my siblings for the day? I will be back later for the feast.” Yuriel asked

His amber eyes tracked the older woman, her eyes going between the four of them standing together as Yuriel and Michael stood at each of Angel’s sides.

“You may Yuriel. You’ve earned it, for all the service you’ve done for me and my daughters.” Sindel answered with a smile

Angel felt her wrist get grabbed and dragged as her attention went to her brother Yuriel. Michael ran ahead, Yuriel taking you with them as they ran down the hall to a magnificent palace in the distance. It took a few steps, but the three siblings found a very peaceful bridge overlooking most of Outworld that they could sit on. Angel sat down, each of her brothers sitting on either side.

“Come on sister, join us.” Michael begged as he released a set of wings

Micheal’s were dark brown, almost like a hawks feather, to complement his dirty blonde hair and green eyes. His light skin was decorated with dark freckles on most of his face, a small scar visible on his lower lip. Yuriel however, was so much different. His amber eyes were the same sort of “dangerous” energy with his raven hair and wings. His cream colored skin on his arms was littered with tiny marks and what looked like scratch wounds.

“I see you two have scars as well.” Angel spoke out loud

Michael and Yuriel looked at each other, Yuriel sighing as he covered his other arm with a hand. Michael watched with sad eyes.

“Yeah. How much do you remember?”

Angel shrugged. She only knew they were her brothers, that they were the same thing. Other than that, she had nothing else.

“Still covering up those eyes I see. We talked about this-“ Yuriel started

He stopped, realizing Angel wouldn’t remember anyways.

“We talked about this? What’d we talk about?”

“It doesn’t matter anymore. But just know I’m happy you found a place where you belong, wherever you came from.” Michael added

“He’s right. Besides, you’ve got some good friends from where you’re from.”

“You know them Yuriel? How?”

“It’s a complicated… story… I guess. It’s nothing important sister. But do you know what our purpose is? If you can remember, I’ll tell you more.”

Angel looked down, putting her chin against her hands as she leaned over to put her elbows on her thighs. She was frustrated, still not able to understand anything.

“You said my name was, I think, Azriel right?”

Both boys nodded, staying silent for their sister to speak.

“I didn’t remember my name for a long time, up until now. I think… it’s going to take some time for me to understand everything. I barely remember you two, but-“

“You feel like there’s something else?”

“Mhm.”

Yuriel grabbed Angel’s hand, holding it tightly as he held onto her like this would be the last.

“There is a little more… if you would like to know.”

Angel nodded quickly, wanting to hear what Yuriel had to say.

“Well… there were seven of us. Me, Michael, you, Zariel, Toriel, Amenidael, and Raphael, we were all born at the same time. It was always just the seven of us, and we were…”

“Chaotic. But we knew better.” Michael interjected

“As I said, we were a family. Believe it or not, you’re the eldest, me being second.” Yuriel added

“I’m… the oldest? Out of the three of us?”

Both of them nodded, leaning close against their sister.

“Yes you were. And by far, you’re the strongest. I’m somehow stronger than Yuriel.”

“Michael!”

“What?”

“You know how the power scaling works!”

“Yeah? And it’s bullshit.”

“Okay okay calm down you two.” Angel spoke breaking their small argument

Both Yuriel and Michael calmed down, relaxing at their sisters words.

“Still have the authority huh?”

“What does that mean?”

“You were always good wrangling all of us as we got older, the most peaceful out of us all. Perhaps that’s why you were the favorite.”

Angel blinked, her mind reeling as she recalled the times where she would watch Tomas and his brothers fight each other. Sibling banter, that’s all it was.

“I guess it’s just my nature for everyone to be peaceful. Perhaps that’s why Liu Kang trusts me.”

Michael crossed his arms and rolled his eyes.

“Ah yes almighty Lord Liu Kang, the bane of my existence.”

“And what’s that supposed to mean?”

“Nothing sister. Michael just doesn’t like a lot of people, mostly Kuai Liang and Bi Han.”

“You know them?”

“Of course we do sister! We may be younger than you but we’ve been around a few worlds to understand how those two are.”

Angel felt something flutter in her brain, her heart also telling her to speak.

“What about Tomas?”

Both boys went wide eyed, like they saw a ghost.

“We actually don’t know much about him.” Michael responded uncrossing his arms

“Yeah. Perhaps we both need some time to come to understand your friends.”

Some sort of signal went off in the distance where everyone was gathered.

“Time to go back.”

“Wait… I have an idea.”

“Oh Elder Gods no-“

“Let’s fly back! Last one there is a rotten egg!”

Michael took off like a jet, Yuriel and Angel standing still for a second.

“Hey wait for me bird-brain!” Yuriel shouted as he did the same

Angel took a breath, seeing the ground thousands of feet below her. If she fell and couldn’t fly, this would be dangerous. Angel closed her eyes, taking a step, putting one foot out. As she came to step toward the edge more, she jumped before her toes touched the edge. It took mere seconds but as Angel closed her eyes, her wings did the work, shooting off like a firework. Opening her eyes as she felt herself fly into the air at almost rocket speed, Angel saw the world around her and below her as she caught up quickly with Yuriel and Michael. She shot right past them, making both stop in alarm at how fast and how quickly she could maneuver around. Angel dove down, quickly weaving around each pillar of Empress Sindel’s castle like it was nothing, not noticing her friends were watching as Yuriel and Michael caught up to her, staying right behind her in this race. Hundreds of people could see the three of them racing around as the siblings went on with their game.

“Hey! Come back here!” Michael shouted

Both boys were right behind her, making Angel pull up into the sky and rolling over them going the other way, making both boys crash into the wall they hadn’t been paying attention to.

“Ha!”

Angel looked down, turning to the right slightly as she came to a slow gliding pace, gently touching down as she found Liu Kang and Raiden away from the crowd.

“Nice landing.” Raiden joked

“Oh come on Raiden that was fucking sick!” Johnny shouted

“Easy calm down Johnny.” Kenshi replied

“I had no idea you could go that fast Angel.” Kung Lao added

Angel took a deep breath, feeling air slowly fill her lungs again after all of that. She was out of practice, perhaps she needed to train flying with weights. But where had her brothers gone? Oh well maybe she left them behind and they’d catch up soon.

“I didn’t either honestly.” Angel responded to the four men

“Impressive work there my student. Seems like we each have more to learn from you.” Liu Kang said with a smile

Meanwhile…

Yuriel was doing his own thing, quietly watching from the sky as he trailed both Tomas and Kuai Liang, who stepped aside from the group a while ago.

“Tomas come on you have nothing to be worried about. Angel is just as strong as you are, I’m sure she could overpower her brothers easily.”

“I’d like to believe you… but something feels wrong.”

“About them?”

“No. Not her brothers. It’s about something else I feel.”

“What might that be brother?”

There was silence, Yuriel stopping on the top of a pillar overhead of the two ninjas.

“I’m not sure. I feel as if there’s something I’m missing.”

Yuriel didn’t need to hear another word, quickly flying to the ground between both brothers. Yuriel slowly rose from his kneeling position on the ground, making eye contact with Tomas who he was facing at the moment.

“I mean you both no harm.” He said with his hands up

Both Kuai Liang and Tomas froze, quickly looking to each other before putting their weapons away.

“I know you both have no reason to trust me, but plus now, I’d never do anything to ruin my relationship with my sister.”

Tomas glared at the young man before him. Yuriel didn’t look that much younger than both him and Kuai Liang.

“How come you never went to find her?” Tomas asked bitterly

Yuriel looked sad, holding something in that looked a lot like heartbreak and suffering.

“I didn’t mean for it to be this way I swear. You have to believe me as much as I wanted to, I couldn’t risk her safety.” Yuriel answered

“Safety? She came to us with no memory of you or your brother, she had nothing. All she had was us, and now you wanna apologize after what, a year of you being away?”

Tomas was about to jump at Yuriel, Kuai holding him back before he could do anything stupid.

“I knew she’d be safe away from us, yet I know what I did was wrong. There’s a lot that you don’t know, and a lot more I can’t tell you.”

To be continued…

A/N: ayooooo say hello to the new OC’s I’ve added

[moonshynecybin]

In the beef between Valentino and Marc I can't take a position. This will be a little long but allow me to articulate my thoughts.

I understand where both of them were coming from and both points of view. Why?

I think that to better understand Vale it is important to keep some factors in mind: 2015 was the first year after the disastrous two years at Ducati where he had a chance to compete for the world championship, in 2011 one of his closest friends - not exactly known for being the most cautious driver on the track - died, and finally he was getting old. It's also important to keep some things in mind about Marc: he saw his idol complimenting him since before he took part in MotoGP, he was very young and super thirsty for victory. That said, things started to go downhill at Assen in 2015, Rossi made a Rossi old style overtake and Marc got a taste of it which must have been a bit bitter, so bitter that he called himself “the moral winner of the race", for Valentino, however, that moment was a factor that certainly gave him extra determination, that made him remember who he was before slowly losing himself. Jorge Lorenzo also said it in one of his interviews: “The last straw was in Assen, when they touched each other on the chicane. They were blaming each other" explained Lorenzo, according to him and also according to Valentino that was the moment in which Marc decided to make Rossi lose the world championship. Then when they raced in Australia and Rossi found himself just 11 points behind Lorenzo, he was convinced that Marc had favored Lorenzo at Philip Island, saying that every time he passed Marc then Marc overtook him but only to slow down and give the possibility of letting Jorge pass and putting distance between the two. The fact that Marquez didn't really enjoy Assen was certainly a theory that went in Vale’s favor. In a tense situation like that you tend to overanalyze everything and therefore I understand how easy it was to find malice in Marc's gestures. At that point for Vale it was as if he was fighting for the world championship against two people instead of one, which explains what happened in Sepang which was the culmination of something that had started well before. Marc was in Valentino's way the whole time and so I'm sure Rossi kicked him (even if he says he didn’t) having lost his patience. Imagine driving to try to win your tenth title against your teammate who is faster than you and having a this new talent standing in your way out of annoyance. Vale at this point wasn't racing to be competitive, he was racing to win THE title and instead suffered a defeat both on a sporting and personal level.

At the same time we must also try to understand Marc's point of view: I'm pretty sure that before Sepang Marquez didn't actually intend to sabotage Lorenzo, he certainly didn't like what had happened in Argentina and Assen. Up until that point Valentino hadn't really had the chance to fight him to his full potential, so seeing how Vale was beating him and acting lowkey cocky about it afterwards must not have been very pleasant for Marc. Sepang was the moment in which he decided to repay with the same coin, I don't think that during the race in Sepang Marc was specifically trying to sabotage Valentino, I think it was more of an almost involuntary reaction due to the precedents, but after Sepang without a doubt anyone else would have preferred to see anyone win the world championship other than Valentino. So for Valentino what Marc did was just a child's whim and for Marquez what Rossi did was the reaction of an insecure adult man. I have no difficulty understanding Marc's resentment, if you can call it that, towards Vale, especially knowing how competitive Marc is, but at the same time I also understand how all of Marquez's actions were easily misunderstood by Valentino, especially given the situation in where he was.

for sure man!! 90% of what i do on this blog is try and get at the root of where they’re both coming from during 2015 and this is a lot of it and very well articulated!! and you don’t have to like. pick a side and have a hard line stance here it’s sports who gaf… i just love marc he’s my baby girl…

however. i WILL say. the past where i start slipping into beating vale with hammers territory is the press conference before the race and then the public backlash afterwards. marc was an adult for sure, but it’s GLARINGLY obvious to me that vale had a LOT more control in this situation in terms of the media, and he leveraged that against marc deliberately in ways that kinda sucked! marc got his house broken into! marc got death threats! marc thought, okay maybe he’s not my friend anymore but he’s still my hero, and then vale BLINDSIDED him publicly :( i know vale was going through it and thought marc was sabotaging him but. marc still rates those few weeks as some of the worst of his life. especially considering how young he was at the time. so i still love vale but i’m hashtag team marc here… like he collected his bikes!!! while they were racing!!!! he loved him. and vale REALLY hurt him.

[waru-chan8]

I was not going to say anything, but Pecco has been pissing me off recently so here it is. A rant why all he said is wrong.

Let’s start with him asking a difference between the official and satellite bike. If he managed to get what he wants, development will be slower because only oficial riders will do it. Ducati will no longer use 4-8 riders for the job will be on the official rider’s plates which means:

1) Less time for the set up because you need to focus on the development 2) Slower development because it will be done by 1 or 2 riders because factories will no longer gave new stuff to no-official riders.

At the end of the day, Pecco who complained about having to test, set up the bike and race will have to do it all over again. And he is not ready for hat. If he can’t see his own mistakes, not even when other riders suggest them he is not ready for that responsibility.

About the Fantastic 4 (either Vale-Jorge-Dani-Casey or Vale-Jorge-Dani-Marc) they were on official bikes because they won those places. They were fast because it’s in their ADN and they showed they deserved the official bikes. Dani had said multiple times, for Honda to trust him in 125cc and 250cc he had to prove how fast he was. They where in a factory bike because they showed their potencial and made him ear first the trust and then the spot. Definitely they were not winning because they where there, they where there because they where winning.

About Augusto, he himself said it, he was 4th not due to his pace, it was because he was smart about it. He just went with Zarco because it was a pace above his but just enough that allowed him to do it. Augusto did not override the bike or just did more than he could. He was smart something that other riders can’t said. Plus other rookies had have better results than him. Look at Marc or Dani or Fabio or Brad for example. Rookies have the potential to be wherever they want if they are smart and take it easy.

About not being able to overtake several riders at the same time and how dangerous the first lap is, it all comes to the same thing. Be smart. Brad and Rins do several overtakes just by having better launches and taking the smart line. They don’t engage in pointless fights at the first lap and using the fights some riders do to overtake both riders. Also returning to the pace difference between factory and satellite bikes, first laps will be even more carnage because unless you can actually make them qualify first 10 places official and other places the satellites, there will be more contact as the satellites will try to be in front of the factory even more to show they deserve that factory spot.

And finally, do you know how to solve all those problems? Ban the fucking aero. No aero means that the track will become “wider” and will actually allow more fights, more overtaking and less contact. But of course, aero is Ducati’s signature and you won’t ask for it.

[nxwtonsxngster]

oooh writing questions!

1 Describe your comfort zone—a typical you-fic. 🌈

2 Is there a trope you’ve yet to try your hand at, but really want to? 🌈

7 Share a snippet from one of your favorite pieces of prose you’ve written and explain why you’re proud of it. 🌈

8 Share a snippet from one of your favorite dialogue scenes you’ve written and explain why you’re proud of it. 🌈

11 Is writing your passion or just a fun hobby? 🌈

15 If you could choose one of your fics to be filmed, which would you choose? 🌈

hiii ty for asking! love the rainbows 🌈

1- definitely found family! i write these all the time, they’re so easy to come up with and never fail to warm my heart 🩷

2- omg i wanna try writing enemies to lovers one day! it feels like such a complex trope to come up with, i would make my characters fall in love way too easily haha

7- *digging through my unpublished google docs*

“And without even noticing it, we went from something’s missing to a family.”

this is actually a line that i’ve reused in a few of my fics about jorge adopting minho, i feel like it fits them so well in every universe. i cannot describe how important it is to me, how two broken characters learn how to heal and love themselves through the eyes of the family they never knew they were missing, the way they learn how to love someone in a way they never loved anyone before 🥹🥹➰➰➰

8- same context as question 7! unpublished tst AU, a pre-family conversation (don’t mind the english pls it was written a few years ago back when i was still a bilingual baby)

“What’s the role of a parent ?” Minho asked instead.

“Hm,” Jorge thought about it. “I’d say, guiding your children, taking care of them, protecting them from the danger around, comforting them, always being worried for them, whether they’re right here or miles away. Always watching them, even when they don’t know you are. Always making them your number one priority.” He paused, before his eyes widened. “Oh, and the most important thing : loving them unconditionally.”

Minho laughed. “It sounds like you when you’re around me.”

Jorge tilted his head. “Does it ?”

“Yeah, I think so,” Minho answered. “I mean, I don’t know if you love me, let alone unconditionally, but you guide me. Actually, you guide all of us through the mountains, but… it’s different when it’s just me.”

“How’s that ?”

“I don’t think you even notice,” Minho laughed. “During the day, even if we don’t talk, you look out for me ; you glance at me to make sure I’m still here, you quickly put your hand on my shoulder, you hand me a bottle when you see I’m thirsty, you smile at me when you see I’m tired and discouraged… You’re always with me, in a way or another.”

“Oh,” Jorge said. “Hah, you’re right, I’ve never noticed I was doing all of that. But I do know I’m worried about you ; I just didn’t know you could see it.”

“I can, and I appreciate it. A lot.”

i think i really love this dialogue because it reflects how they naturally click in a family dynamic! and ofc i love writing pre-family eheh

11- i don’t think i have any passions tbh (,,okay maybe tmr) so i’d say it’s a fun hobby!

15- definitely the one i’m writing now!! a teaser would be:

vince and jorge, age 45, meet in the library of a small town by the sea. 27 years ago, vince and jorge, age 18, meet in the high school of that same town by the sea. aka, how the past has to be unfolded to fix the present :)))

i would cry watching this movie

[hypnofur1]

My Life as a Hypno-Fur Queen: Chapter 3

by Hypnofur

I had such a hang over the night after the Biltmore experience. Both an actual, alcohol dehydration induced hang over, and kind of a mental one too. I can’t believe I made my husband, and a perfect stranger lick their own cum off my legs and the floor. That was crazy. Too crazy. I knew I had gone too far.

I had Nick take me home the next day. We never did anything about transferring the mini van to my hard luck sister Denise. We just went home and I slept for like 20 hours. Nick was great. He explained to my Mom that we wouldn’t need her for the rest of the weekend, and just made an excuse that I had come down with a bug. He then took care of the boys for Saturday and Sunday without bothering me at all. I didn’t like hypnotically force him to do that, he just did it because he was a good guy, and my husband who loved me. I had to get back to that. I had to get away from this crazy hypno dominatrix stuff. It was all too much.

I didn’t even wake up until like mid day Sunday. For a moment, when I first awoke in my beautiful house, in my own bed, I heard the laughter of my boys down stairs, and I knew Cindy was back. It felt great. It felt right. Warm, safe, pure, good. But then the phone rang. It was my sister Denise.

“Hi Den” I said as my eyes rolled. She immediately went on and on about the mini van. Why didn’t I drop it off, etc. So annoying. I mean, I know I went back on my word, but like, it was an unbelievably nice favor to just GIVE her a car, so why was she being so annoying about it when it didn’t instantly work out perfectly like she wanted? Because she was awful Denise, that’s why.

I told her I would figure out something for her car problems, and I hung up the phone. A thought of hypnotizing Doug Stumbly to give my sister a car at my command briefly flashed through my head of course, but I quickly shooed it away. I didn’t want to go there. I couldn’t go there.

That night I made us all a nice, healthy grilled chicken dinner. Nick and the boys then watched some sports thing, and I watched it with them. Well, I was in the same room as them at least. I was scrolling through my phone. I found myself on the Stumbly motor group website. Then I caught myself. No! I went back to Instagram. Because I had gone to the site, an ad for Stumbly Motors popped up on my IG. Argh! The stupid social media algorithm was pushing me to turn back into an evil hypnotist as I was trying so hard to be Cindy the caring wife and mom.

But, through what I felt was an unbelievable amount of will power, I made it through the night without any hints of ‘Cynthia’. I was ‘Cindy’ all night. It felt good. It was good. Boring, but good. Well, good-ish. I couldn’t help but notice that Nick hadn’t brought up what happened in Providence at all. He was acting like nothing happened. That was interesting, but probably better. Again, a little bit boring, but probably better.

Jorge the carpenter showed up the next day, as it was now Monday. I could tell I freaked him out with my little performance last week. I laughed to myself as he politely, but timidly, scurried by. It was an evil laugh, so I scolded myself.

I did pretty good the rest of the morning. I got caught up on PTA emails and called my mom and thanked her for coming on Friday. She asked if I was feeling better. In answered with an exuberant “yes”. After all, I was feeling a lot better. I had gone a little bit off the deep end, but now I was back on the straight and narrow.

It wasn’t long before the boys came home from school. They were happy, and I was happy to see them. They asked what was for dinner. Earlier in the morning, I had considered making pork chops. Now though, that seemed like so much work. Ugh, I wasn’t into that.

I texted Nick and told him to bring home wings from the wings place. The boys loved those, and they had a great salad that I liked too. It took Nick a while to respond, which annoyed me.

I have to admit, I was secretly hoping he’d respond wirh “yes Cynthia”, but when he finally did, it was just an “ok”. That was underwhelming… but good. Good for sure. That was better. We had a marriage, a partnership. I wanted a loving husband, not a hypnotized slave to my will. I did, really. But “ok”? That’s it? …. Wait. Nope, I wasn’t going to go down this road.

Jorge the Carpenter came down all nervous. He was explaining how he couldn’t hang the last mirror because of mounting hardware or something, and how he had to leave it on its side up against the wall. I could see that he was afraid to look into my eyes. I was actually getting off on how afraid he was. I was the popular girl in high school, and I admit, I liked when the nerds were afraid of me. High school. I had to think about high school! More to the point, my high school (and middle school) aged boys. I had to think of them, not tormenting a carpenter. I thanked Jorge and let him go, telling him he could worry about the mirror later.

I focused on the boys and caught up with what was going on with them. Well, at least with what few words they’d say. They were teen boys, they weren’t really over communicative with their feelings or experiences. So, the whole conversation lasted like five minutes. Then I was back on my phone. Stupid Instagram kept showing my Stumbly Motor Group ads. His marketing person must have paid extra for like the super algorithm package or something.

I thought about whoever that marketing person might be. Probably some young woman fresh out of college. She probably thought of Doug Stumbly as some stately captain of industry. Which he was, I guess. That marketing person had no idea that her rich, powerful boss had spent Friday night deeply hypnotized playing with himself on his knees at my command. I felt my pussy tingle as I thought about that. No! No, I wasn’t going to go there.

Between that moment and dinner, I did really good. I was cheerful mom and wife Cindy. The boys were thrilled about take out wings on a Monday night. Nick asked why we were doing take out (as opposed to me making something). I was going to come up with a better excuse then “I didn’t want to cook because it was boring”, but I was having trouble thinking of one, so I asked him to pour me a glass of wine. (Asked, not commanded.) I was doing everything right, at least until the first drop of the white wine touched my lips.

I don’t think I’m an alcoholic. I don’t think I’m addicted to hypnotic domination either. I don’t think these things have the better of me, but I’m not entirely sure.

The boys burned through their dinner, then asked to be excused so they could start homework, which really meant video games, but I didn’t really care at that moment. I let them go. In fact, I suggested to Nick that we play a board game. That isn’t as out of the blue as it sounds, we actually have been doing this since we were dating. We both just kind of liked it.

Anyway, he was still finishing his wings and beer. He dipped one of the wings in the ranch sauce that they had given us. Now two glasses of wine in, I felt the wickedness build up inside me. “See, I knew you’d like this better than pork chops. I know you love licking up white creamy stuff.” I said with an evil smile.

He almost choked on the chicken wing “Cindy, Jesus!” He said, shocked.

“What? You obviously do. Which do you like better Nick? That ranch dressing, or your own cum?” I asked. Boy, it really didn’t take me long to flip back to evil. Maybe I do have a problem?

“Cindy, I-“ he stumbled.

“Tell me.” I commanded.

“Ranch dressing” he said.

“Well then why did you lick up your own cum?” I toyed.

“Cindy, c’mon. Stop” he pleaded.

“Tell me” I commanded again.

“Because you made me” he said. God, he almost looked scared of me. “Cindy, please. I’m still trying to even come to grips with that. I mean, this isn’t the kind of thing that we do. Is it? You had that other guy, and me… we were just…. “ he stumbled

“Say the word furs, Nick” I said calmly

“Furs” he said, still looking scared. I should have felt bad about him being scared. Instead, I like… liked it.

“Say the word hypnotized.”

“Hypnotized.” He said quietly.

“Who hypnotizes you Nick?”

“You do”

“Who is your fur queen Nick?”

“You are Cynthia”

“Good. Now, go pour me another glass of wine. “

“Yes Cynthia” he said.

Was he hypnotized? Yes? No? Maybe. He was dominated by my hypnotic power, that was the big picture answer, and that made my pussy tingle. I smiled as he handed me my third glass of wine. I was already a bit buzzed, for sure. “Sit on your knees next to me.” I told him. I could see his erection through his pants. I was afraid the boys would see his tent pole, though I may have been a bit more drunk than I thought at that point, because them seeing him kneeling next to me would also have been pretty weird I guess.

I was working through glass number three pretty quickly. I was getting hot now. Not just like, sexy hot, but legit hot. I took off my sweater and blouse. I had a white, cotton tank top underneath. Then I kicked off my jeans, leaving only my white cotton panties. Nick didn’t say anything, but his eyes were wide as he stared at me. I smiled at him as I confidently walked up to my closet, half dressed.

I stumbled upstairs, finishing my third glass of wine. I grabbed some furs and threw them on the ground, then plopped down. I saw the mirror Jorge was talking about leaning up on the wall in front of me. Feeling wicked, and sexy, I sent a picture to Doug Stumbly. I had far less concern than I should about sending a picture of myself in a tank top and my panties to a man I barely knew. It wasn’t safe, but I ddin’t care.

I took the picture and hit send. Within a few seconds, I could see that he saw it. I couldn’t believe he had his read receipts left on. What a boomer.

Doug: Hello! Lovely picture.

Cynthia: What do u c in the picture Douglas?

Doug: A lovely lady that I made a mistake with.

Uh, not the answer I was looking for. Jeez, these guys lick up their own cum at my hypnotic command one time and they get all freaked out about it.

Cynthia: What else do u c in the picture Douglas?

Doug: I really don’t think this is a good idea. The other night got out of hand I’m sorry if I gave you the wrong idea.

WTF? I send him a picture of me, drunk in basically my underwear, surrounded by furs and it doesn’t do the trick? I was getting pissed. Oh, wait, the furs aren’t white. This weirdo and his incredibly specific fetish only goes for white furs.

Cynthia: Do u c any white furs, Doulgas?

Doug: No.

Cynthia: Does that seem right? Would u like 2 see me in a a white fur, Douglas?

(after a small pause) Doug: Yes

Cynthia: I know u would. Do u want 2 c me in 1?

Doug: I shouldn’t

OK, now we were getting somewhere. I knew I just needed to find the right button to push.

Cynthia: Douglas, I want u to jerk yourself off thinking of me hypnotizing u while I am wearing a white fur. Do as I command.

With that, I threw my phone on the hardwood floor. Not a good way to treat expensive electronics, I know, but I was drunk and careless at that moment.

“Nick, come here!” I slurred loudly. He arrived very quickly. He still looked nervous. That turned me on.

“You like eating cum so much, come eat mine. Do it now my furslave!” I told him. Luckily, he thought to close the door behind him as he rushed to obey my orders and went straight to my pussy.

The power I had over him was as intoxicating as the wine. It was like rockets going off in my head when he licked and sucked my pussy slit and his tongue fucked my hole! I held his head and slowly fucked his face as he worked on my cunt with his mouth and tongue for about a minute. That was all it took to have me grunting and moaning and panting and crying out with my pleasure. God, in retrospect, I hope those videogames were goddamned good that night and kept the boys occupied!

Then another minute of him rubbing his mouth all over my pussy and I screamed and I was cumming and cumming and cumming. Feeling my orgasm sweep over me until it took over my entire mind body and soul and I arched up high off the floor and climaxed. I mean I climaxed like I have never done before. My hips were thrusting up and Nick was holding my ass in his hands and licking.

The hypnosis, the control, the power, and quite frankly the darkness over took me. I was Cynthia the Hypnotic Fur Queen and I was fucking evil in that moment. I looked down at him, not as my loving husband and partner, but as my victim. My hypnotized slave.

“You are mine!” I screamed at him as another orgasm overtook me. When he felt me begin to cum he sucked my pussy, all of it into his mouth!

"Yeah! OH GOD! YES! Eat my cum my slave. Slave Slave!!!!!", I know I screamed it at him.

My slave knew what he was doing and he was already sucking it and I was fucking his face as hard as I could. While I held his head with both hands and pushed against it shoving his mouth harder on my hole He didn't resist or fight me. He let me do whatever I needed to do until I had finished cumming. His Queen’s pleasure was all that mattered.

And… then I passed out.

At least, I think I did. I don’t remember anything from the end of the climax to waking up in my bed the next morning, at like 10:30. Nick must have gotten the kids to be that night, and then up and out for school the next morning. He was such a good Dad, and such a good hypnotized pussy licker. No! Good Dad, I had to leave it at good Dad. OMG, I had such a headache.

I got up and started my hangover cure. Tea, asprin, toast, etc. I was starting to feel better as I started the last part of the process, a nice warm bath. While in there, my mind stumbled across a question. If I passed out last night, and never ‘woke Nick up’, was he still hypnotized right now? Was he able to focus on his work, or was he just sitting there, awaiting my next command? The thought of it turned me on. The memory of him submissively working my pussy with his slave mouth turned me on even more.

I fingered myself in the bathtub.

Holy shit. I was like a crazed sex addict.

Fortunately, that was enough to get me through the rest of the morning, and allowed me to be more or less normal when my mom called. She was of course acting like Denise’s freakin’ advocate again, going on and on about the fucking car. My mood was totally shot. I knew I had to handle this car thing for Denise, or they were just going to nag me to death about it. Fuck. Fine. Maybe I’d just handle it today.

It was like 2:00 at this point. I called Nick at the office and told him to come home. It was freaking pouring out, but I didn’t care, I had made up my mind to go down to Providence and handle this car thing. I was putting on my make up and really doing myself up as the boys got home. I just let them play video games right away with some Doritos I bought them. Fuck it, I wasn’t preparing carrots and hummus and filling out the homework chart today. I was just not feeling the ‘mom’ thing. The afternoon was about preparing for a seduction.

Nick seemed… different when he got home. Not hypnotized, persay. He was talking to the boys, and acting normal around them. But something interesting happened when they weren’t around. He got very quiet. He didn’t complain or even ask why I made him come home early from work. Testing a theory, I abruptly told him, “Nick, pour me a glass of wine”

“Yes Cynthia” he said calmly, then immediately went to pour it.

Wow. I was still Cynthia to him. That was fascinating. I wanted to explore this, but Denise annoyingly called me about the car thing again. Then my mom did. Jesus, she was like Denise’s fucking agent sometimes. This had to be the last day of this. I told her I was going to handle it, but that she had to come watch the boys and figure out dinner. She agreed easily.

The glass of wine was nice, but I knew I should stop there. I went to go pick out an outfit as I was putting together a plan. I decided to go with a “rich WASPY” look. I grabbed a cashmere sweater with gold buttons that I had bought for a conference trip that I joined Nick on a few years ago. I knew it made my boobs look great, while still looking classy. It paired nicely with a chanel skirt and sexy, but not slutty, heels. I heard the rain coming down as I grabbed the beautiful silver and white fur that first caught Doug’s eye. Fur doesn’t do well wet, so that was going to be a problem. Refusing to let obstacles stop me, I went with a not quite as nice one that I had grabbed off ebay. I figured it would be enough to do the trick. My mom asked why I was dressed so fancy. I told her I read in a negotiating book that it helped to look rich when buying a car. In truth, it was probably the exact opposite, but she bought it, so I didn’t fight it. I quietly told Nick to bring the bottle of wine and a glass in the car for me while I distracted my mom with details.

The ride down was so strange. It was like Nick was my chauffer, not my husband. It’s not a short ride from our house to Providence either, it was like two hours, especially with the rain. We finally arrived at the Stumbly Motors offices, which were in the downtown. It was winter, so it was dark by the time we got there, but thankfully, not yet 5:00. I had Nick drop me off at the door. I instructed him to go park and wait for me to signal him. When I got out of the car and stood up, I really felt the effects of the wine.

I went inside the very nice office building. There was a security desk at the front. Of course the guards were all checking me out as they directed me to the Stumbly Offices. As I approached, there were glass doors with a young, attractive receptionist sitting at the desk beyond. That didn’t surprise me at all, that’s exactly who I expected to be working at a car dealership’s headquarters. I greeted her with the air of superiority she likely expected based on my outfit. She assumed I was a big deal, so she didn’t even ask why I wanted to talk to Mr. Stumbly, and just sent me to his office down the hall.

That’s where things got a little tricky. He had a secretary sitting at a desk right outside of his office. Unlike a pretty 20-something that didn’t try that hard, this was a woman in like her 50’s. Not ideal. She looked up from her computer at me with an inquisitive look. I had to get ahead of this situation.

“I’m here to see Mr. Stumbly.” I said adamantly as I approached, never slowing down my gait.

“He’s in a meeting Ms….” The woman said.

“Davidson.” I answered, “I’ll wait. He’ll know what this is about. I don’t want coffee, tea, or water.” I said as I just marched right into his office, right by the shocked older woman. To be honest, I didn’t know if this was going to work or not. For that matter, I didn’t know if the meeting Doug was in was taking place in his office. He had a big wooden door that was closed, but thankfully not locked. I went right inside and closed the door behind me. No one was inside, so apparently the meeting was in a conference room or something.

I held my breath for a minute inside the office, thinking the old bag was going to barge in and kick me out, but that didn’t happen. A minute turned into two, which turned into five. When I was finally confident that she wasn’t coming in, I immediately started to get impatient waiting for Doug. How long was this stupid meeting?

I finally heard muffled voices outside the thick wood door. I knew that the hag was trying to explain how I just barged in. My heart jumped as I saw the door handle start to turn as he entered. But then, I felt like I could hear his heart jump as he saw me standing behind his desk, a white fur coat hung by my elbows. Staring right at him with my seductive, dangerous eyes.

“Hello Douglas” I purred.

I immediately saw his eyes flash with emotion. Surprise, anger, and fear all mixed in. I didn’t know which of the three would win the triangular tug of war.

“You can’t be here! I can’t believe you did this!” he said in a ‘yelling whisper’. Looked like anger won, or at least took an early lead.

I’ll admit, his rage unnerved me a bit. I feel like I did a really good job of masking that though. On the outside, I exuded full, unshakeable, sultry confidence. “What, you don’t think I look good in this white fur, Douglas?” I said, immediately leaning on the fetish thing. (I know guys)

“No, I mean, yes you do. It’s not that…. “ he stammered, before regaining his pissed off whisper voice. “This is my place of business!”

“Yes, I know that Douglas. That’s why I am here.” I said cryptically. I was about to get rolling with my plan, but he interrupted.

“I want you to leave!” he whisper demanded.

Silly Dougie. It wasn’t going to be that easy. “You don’t want me to stroke your temples with this white fur for a few minutes first?” I asked coyly.

He paused. Then he paused more. “No” he said weakly.

“Sit down here at your desk Douglas” I said, pointing to his large leather desk chair that I was now standing behind.

He hesitated.

“Douglas, I want you to sit down now. Obey me.” I said, calmly but authoritatively. His legs listened to my call and moved him over to the seat. I softly and gently helped him into the chair. I wasted no time in slowly moving my soft, fox fur sleeves up his the side of his face. I then purposefully moved my warm finger tips to his temples and started stroking. I made sure to keep the fur still in contact with his head. I was very deliberate in this in order to keep his fetish working for me. I could tell just from the sound of his breathing that I was having an effect on him, so I started in with my hypnotic induction before he could even speak.

“I want you to take a deep breath in and feel yourself relax. I want you to feel your arms so relaxed, so weightless. I’ll just help you relax quickly, then I’ll be on my way. No one will suspect anything you have nothing to worry about so you can just sit here and enjoy the feeling of the white fur, and the feeling of the soft touch of my fingertips and my feminine voice.” She said, trying to put him at ease and focus on the enjoyment of it all.

“So, you can just go ahead and feel all of the anxiety just slip away from you. A feeling of pure contentment, of pure tranquilty comes over you. You just feel so wonderful being here with me. So relaxed. Just letting yourself drift into a deep state of relaxation, just like you did the other night. And it feels so wonderful, and so relaxing that you just let yourself float into a wonderful, deep state of hypnosis. You know that feeling now. You’ve been craving it, I’m sure. It’s here now. I’m here now. So you feel so deeply relaxed, so peacefully heavy. In fact, I want you to imagine that you are in a beautiful chair, completely covered in white fur. I’m behind you, stroking your temples, just like I am now.” I said, getting an idea. It was a twist on a pretty standard thing, but if figured it would get him going. Then, at the last minute, I decided to spice it up.

“And I want you to imagine that you are naked Douglas. You are naked, but you are on the soft white fur chair, and you have an incredibly thick and soft white fox fur blanket over you. I have enveloped your body in fur as I am enveloping your mind. Mmmm, can you feel that Douglas?” I asked.

“Yess” he answered dreamily.

“Good, so good. That makes me happy. In front of you is a window. A giant window that looks out to a beautiful sky. The feel of the soft fur on you, the feeling of my fingertips, and my soft voice in your ears all make you feel so wonderful and relaxed. They make you feel so amazing. And as you drift deeper and deeper into a wonderful state of relaxation, you feel so wonderful and relaxed. You so warm and soft in the fur. So wonderful and relaxed. No worries, just in my thrall. Completely worry free as you let go to me more and more. Now, I want you to look up and see how beautiful the wonderful blue sky is before you. Just relax more and more as you continue to look higher and higher into the deep blue sky, as all of the fluffy clouds are before you. There is no anxiety, there is only a wonderful feeling of contentment flowoing over you . As you just float deeper and deeper, you feel all of the tension in your body simply dissolve away. It is the type of profound relaxation that you can never really appreciate until you have moments like this. When you can feel the sound of my voice relaxing you deeper and deeper. Into a deep state where this is no stress, no anxiety. There is only relaxation, and comfort. A place of wonderful relaxation. A place of wonderful hypnosis. My hypnosis.

And as you drift even deeper now into my hypnosis, you realize that you just want to follow my voice further and further. You realize that you want to go deeper and deeper into this hypnosis, for me. You want to stare so deep into my sky. You want to feel so wonderful and relaxed. As you let yourself drift into a deep, deep state of hypnosis. I want you to look out into the horizon, before you. Where you see the land and the sky meet. You see a beautiful setting sun. Just in the horizon, casting a wonderful and beautiful cast of light over the horizon, over the earth, over the sky. And you just feel so wonderful and relaxed as you just drift into a deep state of tranquility. I am going to count down from the number five to the number zero, and as I do the sun will set. The sun will be completely below the horizon, and you well feel so relaxed and so wonderful. With every number that I say, this feeling will just get a thousand times deeper, and a thousand times stronger. You’ll feel the need to listen to my voice and take in everything that I say. You know it through the power of the sound of my voice that you have been brought into this wonderful state of relaxation. Into this wonderful state of my hypnosis. So you just want to listen to my voice more, and slip deeper into relaxation, and under my spell.

Five, the sun slowly begins to set. And as it does, you know it is time for your subconscious mind to just listen to my voice. And it is time for your conscious mind to just sleep, and go into a deep state of hypnotic slumber

Four. You know it is time to relax and just listen to my voice. It is time to relax and just take in everything that I say so that you can just drift deeper and deeper and relax into a state of deep hypnosis.

Three. You just feel so wonderful and so good, completely surrounded by the white fur. The sun is just setting further down the horizon. Further and further. And as it does, the lights just get more beautiful, more comfortable. They get more soothing. They get dimmer and dimmer, but as they do, you get calmer and calmer.

Two. You see the beautiful sun set. The beautiful rays, the reds, the oranges. Even purples. Every color you see in a sunset, and the colors are so majestic. It is so beautiful, and you just want to listen to my voice more and more and more and go deeper and deeper into hypnosis for me.

One. The sun barely has its crest over its horizon. And you know that when it sets completely, its going to be time to have your conscious mind completely asleep, and have your subconscious mind just listen to everything that I say. Because everything that I say is so important, and you just want to accept everything that I say.

Zero. You know that you just need to obey my voice. The sun is completely set, and you see a beautiful night sky all around you. It feels so beautiful and relaxing to breath in nice and deeply and relax completely. You know it’s time to just listen to my voice. You know it’s time to just take in everything that I say. So just relax and drift deeper into a deep state of relaxation.” I said, knowing full well he was completely deep.

I’ll admit, I didn’t know whether the old bag at the desk was going to barge in or not, so I was glad to have gotten to this point, as he was now totally under, and it wouldn’t matter if a band of elephants ran through. Still, I was glad I didn’t have to deal with her. I continued, getting now to the exciting parts.

“As you sit there listening to the wonderful sound of my voice. You know you just want to take in everything that I say. And everything that I say becomes a wonderful and perfect truth in your brain. You know this, because it is through the power of the soft touch of the white fur, the soothing feel of my fingertips, and the sound of my voice that you have been brought to such a wonderful place of hypnosis for me. You know it through the power of these you have been brought to such a deep place of relaxation and pleasure, where your mind is completely open to everything that I say.

You know in this deep state of hypnosis, that you want to listen to my voice and accept everything that I say. And you know the first thing that you want me to say, and that you want to accept into your brain is that you know that I am your Queen, your Fur Queen. You love me being in control of you. You love being my furslave. You love it when I’m in control. You love it when you just obey me and serve me. In whatever I say, whatever I tell you . You just listen to the sound of my voice. Just giving you any order that I say, any command that I give you. You feel so addicted to being so deeply hypnotized by your Fur Queen. To be so completely relaxed. To be so completely owned by me. That’s what you know. That’s what you desperately, desperately want. So wonderful, so relaxing. And that’s what you want. To be so comfortable, so relaxed, so hypnotized. Very deeply hypnotized and obedient to me. You are a loyal subject to your Fur Queen Douglas.

You’ll give me anything I want. Anything at all. Won’t you Douglas? Say yes Cynthia”

“Yes Cynthia” he answered. God, that got me so turned on. I felt my dominant streak flare up.

“Get out of the chair, get on your knees. Face me” I commanded sharply. As he exited his big leather desk chair, I sat down in it. I slowly and seductively crossed my legs in front of him as he stared at me from his now kneeling position. God, this all felt so powerful.

“What is the most expensive car you have on your lot?” I said, definitely feeling cocky.

“The Mercedes Benz EQE” he replied docilly.

“Is it a sports car?” I asked. I don’t know cars that well.

“yes Cynthia” he said. I momentarily fantasized about whipping around like that. I’m sure it only had two seats, and no way for me to bring the kids, or my mom, or groceries or anything, but Cynthia didn’t care about that. Those were Cindy problems. Maybe I’d make him give me that? Then again, I live in stupid Massachusetts, where it is winter like six months of the year. Getting stuck on a hill, or sliding into a telephone pole was kind of both a Cindy problem and a Cynthia problem.

“What is your most expensive SUV?”

“The Mercedes GLC AMG” he answered.

“Mmmm. Mercedes. Don’t you think I’d look amazing in a Mercedes, Douglas?” I said, batting my eyes at him.

“Yes Cynthia” he said, I could tell he was so deeply infatuated with me.

“Good. Have someone get it. I want to drive it home tonight” I commanded.

“I-I can’t” he said weakly.

“Why not??” I asked, very annoyed that he didn’t obey without question.

“Paperwork, registry, especially for out of state… I’m sorry, but it will take at least a day” he said, almost fearful.

Nick and I have bought cars before, so I knew this was true. I realized I’d have to come back tomorrow. Probably best, I was actually pretty drunk, so filling out paperwork might not have been the best plan… nor was driving myself home. Ok, I guess it was time to wrap this up. “Who do you serve Douglas?” I said, looking deep in his eyes.

“I serve you my Fur Queen” he said, likely so glad I was not going to lose my shit over the paperwork stuff.

“Again”

“I serve you my Fur Queen”

“Are you hard, Douglas?” I asked, getting a aroused again by his chants of submission.

“Yes Cynthia” he said.

“Good, but I don’t want you to come unless I give you permission, do you understand? And you aren’t going to be able to cum until you see your Fur Queen drive away in the Mercedes, do you understand?” I said, really feeling my power. God I was so turned on.

“Yes Cynthia” he replied like an obedient little puppy.

“Good. Make it happen” I said flatly. And with that, I just got up and walked by him, right out the door. The cranky old bat at the desk scowled at me as I walked by. No matter, I’d have that bitch fired if she looked at me wrong one more time. That thought made me feel even more powerful.

I was completely basking in that power as Nick picked me up that the door. Again, he was more my chauffer than my husband. He didn’t say a word. He was just like a faithful servant. My servant. There to fucking serve me. Fuck, I loved that. Rhode Island is very small, so we soon crossed over the Massachusetts border on the highway. I was getting so turned on thinking about all of my power. I told Nick to pull into a rest area I saw a sign for.

There wasn’t a McDonalds or a convenience store at this rest area, it was only for people that needed to park for a minute. I directed him to a space where there weren’t many other cars. It was dark, cold, and the rain was coming down hard. No one was out of their car, and the few cars that were there had fogged up windows, probably from people reading maps or answering texts.

I turned to Nick as I opened the Mini Van door and said, “I want you to come please me. Obey me now!” And with that I stepped out of our family car, then stepped out of my panties, letting them fall to the parking lot ground. Nick came around as instructed and kneeled in front of my pussy. I lifted my posh chanel skirt up to give him access, and he went to town.

My husband, my one time partner, was now my hypnotized, obedient slave, licking my pussy outside in a public rest area in the freezing cold rain, as my hands dug into his hair. It was so wrong, but so decadent. I noticed one of the the fogged up windows a few spaces away suddenly had a hand wiping it clear. I stared into that car and laughed wickedly as I enjoyed Nick’s inexperienced, but enthusiastic tongue on my clit.

Then my face got hit with a very bright spotlight. The light was rolling towards me. I soon realized it was the side spotlight from a police car. Feeling sassy beyond sassy, I just told Nick to keep going as I stared down the officer as they were rolling by. Well, I think I stared down the officer, I really couldn’t see a thing with the spotlight in my face. But, my peripheral vision did pick up the fact that there was steam coming off my body and skin in the freezing cold rain. I thought about how that must look to the officer. A beautiful, rich looking woman getting eaten out as the rain hit her and she was literally steaming hot. It was like something from a music video, or a porn.

“Let’s go hun, you can’t work here” the officer said from his car.

I didn’t know what he meant. What did he mean work? Oh shit, he thought I was a prostitute. Ok, I guess that wasn’t a wildly outlandish assumption. I was going to just get back in the mini van and go… but like I said, sassy beyond sassy. “I’m not working” I said loudly to the officer through the rain, never breaking my gaze of where I thought he was. “He’s my husband”

“Sir, can you please get up?” The officer said to my hypnotized husband, who had not stopped pleasuring me orally.

“He only hears my voice” I said. Fuck, that was so hot to say.

“Sir. Get up now!” the officer shouted.

“He’s deeply hypnotized. He only hears and obeys my voice” I told the officer again, still with my wicked, sexy stare and all the steam coming up around me.

The State Trooper said nothing in return, instead the spotlight turned from me and went to our license plate. Nick kept working me at my command. After a few minutes, the officer got out of his car and approached us. He was very tall. Looked to be early thirties.

“Mrs. Davidson, I don’t know what kind of game you and Mr. Davidson are playing here”, he said, clearly getting our names off of the our plates that he ran in his cruiser, “but this is a public rest area. I can arrest you for this.” He said… but not that firmly. Usually Statie’s tried to intimidate. I thought one was going to shoot me on 93 once because I was going like 11 miles over the limit. But this guy wasn’t doing that. Hmmm.

“Nick, stand up, see only me.” I said flatly, looking at the officer right in the eye as I did so. I straightened my skirt as Nick stood and looked at me. I looked at the officer’s name badge. “You are intrigued by this, aren’t you… Trooper Bates?” I said, raising an eyebrow.

“Ma’am, I –“

“Open your mind and hear my phone number. Remember it. 978-555-6387” I said to him, interrupting whatever stuttering he was going to do.

“Nick, open my door. Pay no attention to the officer.” I said, never breaking my stare with Trooper Bates. Nick followed my orders of course, and I went back into the mini van. Trooper Bates just stood there, frozen. He was turned on by this. I knew the look by this point. That look fueled my crazy, and emboldened me. I rolled down the mini van window.

“My panties are on the ground there Trooper Bates. Pick them up, and take custody of them. Text me later this week, and I’ll tell you what your next step is.” I said before rolling up the window but still not breaking eye contact. When the window was up, I told Nick to pull away and drive home. Trooper Bates did not move. He just stood out there at that rest stop in the pouring rain, watching us drive away.

Holy shit, I was officially crazy.

And officially cold, like freezing. I was soaking wet… and I mean my clothes and hair and stuff. I turned up the heat full blast and told Nick to drive as fast as he safely could. The wine, the power rush, the adrenaline, was all catching up to me. I was exhausted.

Nick went to work the next morning, so I woke up alone. It was so fucking bright in my room. Ugh. I was hung over again. I tried to catch up mentally as to what was going on. I remembered hypnotizing Douglas in his office, a totally weird thing at a rest stop with a cop, and the fact that I needed to go back down to Stumbly Motors today to pick up the car.

So, this was an interesting time for me. I was working on my headache (food, asprin, etc), and hopped in the shower. It was very much a weekday, and I am emphasizing DAY. I felt like Cindy. But, at the same time, I felt like the further Cynthia went each time with all this craziness, the more I was like always Cynthia too. With that said, today would be a good test for Cynthia.

I threw on some of my regular clothes. A black logo t-shirt and some black jeans. It a blustery cold winter day, so wearing a fur totally made sense, and I of course chose a white one, as I was meeting with Douglas. Putting the fur on definitely increased the Cynthia vibes, but figuring out a train schedule to Providence, and working all that out was very Cindy-ish.

The train took me to the Providence train station, and I hailed a cab from there to take me to Stumbly motors. I was already in the cab when I realized I should have just commanded Doug to send a car. I guess I wasn’t that experienced a controller of people yet. That made me feel very Cindy-ish.

But then the cab driver seemed to be totally checking me out. He asked me what I did, and I told him I was a hypnotist. That made me feel very Cynthia-ish. He asked if I helped people quit smoking and stuff. I told him no, that I turned them into my obedient servants. He gave a nervous laugh while looking at me in the windshield mirror. I arched an eyebrow, as if to say “what about that do you find funny?”. He was quiet the rest of the short trip. That made me feel very Cynthia-ish. In fact, I was really feeling that was the cab pulled up. I stepped out in front of Stumbly Motors and looked up the building. Doug’s building. But then again, Doug was now mine… so in effect, this building was now mine. Stumbly Motors was now mine.

I fucking loved that…

#furfetish #femdom #femdomhypno #hypno

[annakie]

Fixing The House Part Nine: Within a Room, Somewhere.

Part One: I Do Not, In Fact, Have the Power

Part Two: Let’s Spend Lots of Money!

Part Three: All These Things That I’ve Done

Part Four: I Really Want to Stay At My House

A little interlude.

Part Five: Power Down

Part Six: You Will Leave Some Paint

Part Seven: Backwards to go Forwards

Part Eight: Master of Bathrooms

Another update? Already?

Yeah, we are really starting to close in on the end now. Probably 2 more days of Arturo's time and my checklist of what's left will be all checked off. I have slightly mixed emotions about that, but we'll get there! Last time, I posted in extreme depth about the master bathroom. I promised an update on that when the last two things happened, and they did! So we'll start with that, then I think we're just going to do all three of the bedrooms (or what should be bedrooms) because a lot of what happened in these three rooms was a lot the same.

MASTER BATH FINAL UPDATE

First, art prints came in so I did, after a mere twelve years, decorate the medicine cabinets with art. It was more annoying to get them in than I was hoping for but both bathrooms art looks perfect so I'm happy with the results.

Just a lil Monet in pretty complementary green and brown.

And, the big thing was, the new window was put in today!!

So one of the reasons it took so long was Arturo was trying to get the window without bars. But he went to several places that said they had the right window without bars but all of them were either in a salmon color and we definitely wanted white, or they just lied. This morning he sent me a picture of a window with bars and I was just like "Get it, I just want the new window DONE!"

Soooo....

Oh hey, a window you can see out of? Amazing. Honestly looks great and I'm happy with it. They painted the entire windowsill white, which I didn't love but I get why. I might try re-painting it to cream later, though. Or that might look terrible. :p

So yeah, now the master bathroom is completely done. No items on the checklist. First room to earn that honor!

-------------

THE MASTER BEDROOM

Now, lets move on to the bedrooms, starting with the master bedroom.

It's a bedroom. There's almost never exciting pictures of a bedroom. But there's a couple of pre-move-in pics?

Along with a very "I have little money and this is the only shit I own and I just moved in" type pic at the top."

And yeah that is the bedroom suite I drastically overpaid for in these pics.

It was better a year later.

Big regret though forever is going to be keeping those ugly green blinds up for 21 years. It was so easy to change those a couple of months ago? I mean Jorge did it, not me, but I both could and should have. They were not good at keeping light out in addition to their uglyness and many had broken tabs that had to be repaired.

The color was Dusty Apricot in there for 21 years, pretty cozy and tbh I was pretty happy with it the entire time. Almost didn't change it when it came time this year.

Probably could dig up some pics of when it had the white carpet from 2009 to 2019 but... that's OK. Much more pleasant memories when I got the laminate put in. Here, I had yet to put most stuff back into the room, I was just so damn happy to not have carpet anymore.

So for the renovation, obviously getting the sliding glass door replaced was definitely the biggest and most important part. I cannot tell you how much better life is with that new door. The best thing is that it dampens sound so much better. Like I could hear every dog in a block radius barking before it felt like. Now, if I have my white noise machine going, I don't even hear my next door neighbor's dog barking. They're very courteous about not letting the dog bark a long time usually, anyway. Can't say the same for the across the alley neighbors. It's just such a relief. And not to mention of course the temperature control, which I did last time.

I would wake up all the time to dogs barking. I already posted at length in part six about the new door with pics but I just want to reiterate how much I love that damn door for so many reasons. Looks, the fact that it's so much quieter AND makes everything else quieter, and temperature control. Truly if I could go back and make myself do ONE THING years ago instead of now, it would probably be that door.

I also posted in part six about the ceiling fans, and hell yeah I still love the fan.

And THEN I posted before that in the Interlude about the wall color, a bit.

That painting hangs over my bed and it means so much to me. I've probably posted about it somewhere before, but when I got my new job in 2012, they also hired a new office manager, Mary, at about the same time as me and we got along great. We both kind of hinted at our bosses that the office was ugly and unwelcoming to clients and had a lot of wasted space.

So here's a post about what we did together, me and Mary, with some pics but not of the painting, which is one of the things we bought to liven up the office. We saw it, both LOVED IT, and bought it. It hung up behind the front desk, it was the first thing you saw when walking in the front door, every day until late 2017 when the company got bought out and things went to shit.

I've talked about that job a lot, both when I had it and after, here on tumblr and how much I LOVED it there, so many of us who worked there did. It was a great place to work and all of us in IT and Development and a handful of others (like Mary) became really close work-friends. It was a special place that was still a job and we didn't do the "We're a family!" bullshit there, but it was like, a great job. I set up a Discord when things went south and it's still active. My Sunday Night D&D game started at that job and we're still playing. And there are ten of us from there who work at the place I work now because we try to stick together. (There are other clumps of people together at other jobs, too.)

Mary and I had a joking rivalry about who was going to be the first one to steal THE PAINTING and hang it up in our own homes.

Mary left the company (along with everyone else) not too long into things Going to Shit. And not long after the new company announced we would be moving to a different office. They more or less let those of us who were left take whatever we wanted, and there's stuff to talk about there, but that day I walked out with The Painting. I think at one point someone from the new company asked what happened to it since they liked it and I just played dumb. In my head I was playing no fucking way I'm telling you it's in my house.

So yeah, it got hung up over my bed not long after and so when it was time to decide to repaint the master bedroom, the bedroom would get painted FOR The Painting.

I pulled the main orange, called Chivalry Copper (have I mentioned I like copper yet?) straight out of the painting, as shown above. And knowing it was a crazy color to paint an entire bedroom, Sweet Orange, the top color on that card, was for the other three walls.

It turns out that Sweet Orange isn't that different than Dusty Apricot, lol. A bit lighter, slightly less pink, but pretty close.

Honestly I'm well aware that the colors here, or in any room, aren't for everyone, and this is a particularly crazy choice for a master bedroom, but I love it.

So another decision that happened was... all of the trim getting painted white. You can see in the original pre-move-in pics that allt he trim had been like a pinkish cream color. I painted it all the cream that's in the master bathroom I talked about last time, but because of a chain of decisions, it only made sense to re-do all trim and doors just pure white. It was a good decision.

You can also see here, compared to the pic right above it, that I got a new vent cover. All vent covers were replaced. They were all rusty and had been painted over several times and pretty gross, and now they look fantastic.

Also in this pic is the new closet door hardware. Every closet got the same oil-rubbed bronze door handles, instead of gold handles from the 1960's. Just bringing even the little details up to the modern. Oil-rubbed bronze is basically black and copper and.. something something... me and copper.

All of the closet doors had ISSUES before, I think there was one of five bedroom doors that moved easily and stayed on the track. Literally just today, Arturo fixed all of the closet doors in the house so they all work as intended.

And honestly I thought a few days ago how the closet doors were like an analogy for this house as a whole. Technically, they worked, mostly, but they were all a little bit shitty, each in their own way. They had been fixed up OK a long time ago and just got a little bit worse and a little bit worse and were dated but now not in a super obvious way anymore. But then a fresh coat of paint, replacing the visual with a more modern handle and a little elbow grease from Arturo and voila... still the same door... just way freaking better!

I think I mentioned this before, but every interior door handle ALSO got changed out also to oil-rubbed bronze handles, ten doors in total. Both of these things were Arturo suggestions that I absolutely had not thought about and when he was like "Uh, hey, you going to put in new doorknobs?" I basically smacked myself in the head. Another thing I just never thought about.

I even swapped out four of the doorknobs myself. I would have done more but I couldn't get the old handles off myself, lol.

There's a better version of this picture but it doesn't have Fry in it, so is it actually better? No.

In the master this door was rebalanced so it didn't automatically close today, I didn't even ask Arturo for that, it was just driving HIM crazy so he did it, lol.

That full-length mirror is also new, I never had one in the house and wanted one! Annnnd every door also got a doorstop, also in Oil-rubbed bronze. Many doors didn't have them before.

My bedroom isn't exactly picture-ready-perfect yet, but I'm OK with it.

Along this wall, a few new things. First, the speakers. Those used to be in the office, but my dad gave me new speakers a few months ago.

I bought this little receiver, $35, yeah it's a bad picture, sorry, after the speakers were mounted I connected them to that, and it has bluetooth so I can run music from my phone to the bedroom easily. Sounds amazing. I used to sleep with a little Soundcore 3 bluetooth speaker, which TBH, I would highly recommend if you're in the market for a little bluetooth speaker, it is great. But having two big speakers in the bedroom, even better.

Also in that pic, I painted a little bookshelf the copper color. It'd been in rough shape looks-wise since I acquired it like 25 years ago, and finally it looks cute.

The little white table near the door is brand new, just put it together last night. It holds my white noise machine. I didn't like it so close to my head on the nighttand. Already made the little drawer on that table a junk drawer, but at least my dresser is mostly clutter free. Mostly. There's more work to do.

Still on order is a new white bookshelf that has a cabinet at the bottom, should be here Friday. Going to put it in that far corner and the outside boys' Meow Mix will be going in there, along with the towels for the master bath, to get the rest of the bath clutter out and put somewhere logical. May need to move that TAH poster or the Ninja poster. Plus, I need a little more book storage.

My house has a serious lack of storage and one of the things you'll see in a few places is that I'm working on fixing that as I can.

Also, hey! Ugly green blinds are GONE. Instead, a heavy blackout curtain!

I'm aware that dark grey isn't exactly the most matching color for the room but tbh, that I don't care about. The important thing to me was that the curtain actually blacked out light so I could have a very dark bedroom at any point I was trying to sleep in it. Thinking maybe I should have gone with dark brown instead, but maybe I'll make that change later.

I have a memory foam mattress that doesn't have a cooling component (which, at some point when I have money again I may fix) so generally I just sleep with a sheet until it gets actually cold. Too hot for anything else.

And Fry and Pemily of course have their beds on my bed. Fry uses his a lot. Pemily... only when it's cold, otherwise she just sleeps on the bed directly.

I had Arturo install SIX outlets (instead of just two) next to the bed so I can charge ALL THE THINGS. Two are the bedside lamp and the reading lamp above, though. Not all of these things are ever all in use at the same time. I just have two USBC cords, a MicroUSB, my Fitbit charger and... something else I'm forgetting here.

Just a little quality of life change so I don't have to have a power strip under the table. Way more organized this way.

I already made a note after seeing this to get Arturo to fix the drywall here.

Okay so that's the Master Bedroom! I'm so much happier with it now!

----

Since I talked about all of that stuff there, doing the other two rooms will be much quicker.

But also... I'm tired and want to do something else now, so I'm going to wrap this up and next time we'll talk about the Guest Room and Living room!

[general-yasur]

Lloyd’s Movie-Perfect Surprise

The snow blew outside as the Ninja hung their holiday decorations. Lloyd was especially concentrated, and technically breaking the rules by using his powers but he was running out of time— at least that’s what he told himself. He began mumbling his frustrations as his energy infused hands twitched.

“You look like you’re about to shit yourself.”

Kai stood next to him, startling Lloyd. His powers vanished and his agitation rose.

“Kai! You messed me up! I’m trying to—“

The brothers looked up, seeing the now hung mistletoe. Being spooked must’ve put it into place.

“As per usual, my presence is everyone’s lucky charm. You’re welcome.” Kai bloated, proud from completing a task he had little part in. Lloyd was less than amused and rolled his eyes, “Whatever.”

Jay snickered loudly near the corner with Zane behind him untangling the lights wrapped around himself and Jay.

“What’s so funny?” Lloyd was at a loss, but Jay laughed at everything that crossed his path.

“Both of you are under the mistletoe!”

Lloyd finally understood what Jay was trying to imply, and he thought it ridiculous.

“It doesn’t count.”

“It does! Wouldn’t you say, Zane?” Jay said cheekily. Zane paused, scanning Lloyd and Kai, before he smirked devilishly.

“Of course it counts.”

Lloyd folded his arms, glaring at Zane before looking to Kai for reassurance— but much to his dismay Kai smiled and winked at him.

“No way! This is for one person and that’s not you—“

Kai leaped on the blonde, wrapping his arm around Lloyds neck, putting him into a choke hold. Lloyd struggled, trying to pry away from his brother. Jay and Zane stood there, watching them wrestle under the mistletoe.

“This is— for my boyfriend! Get— I’ll bite you!”

“Give your bro a smooch!”

“Ew!” Lloyd opened his mouth and placed his small fangs against Kai’s arm, silently threatening to bite him, but they both knew Lloyd wouldn’t follow through.

“Fine! Then I’ll have to just steal one.” Kai pulled Lloyds beanie off and gave him a big smooch on the forehead before letting go. Kai smiled, throwing Lloyds beanie in his face.

“You’re so lame.”

“But you love me.” Kai grabbed a box from the hallway, before entering the living room with the others.

Lloyd thought to chase them to stop Jay from telling everyone, but he let it go. He smiled instead, rubbing his forehead with his sleeve.

His smile faded as he gazed at the ceiling, the mistletoe was crooked. Lloyd could’ve left it, but he wanted his surprise to be nothing short of perfect, so he began to readjust it with his powers.

“I get the feeling you’re hiding from me.”

Lloyd jumped, startled again, and the mistletoe fell to the ground. Right in between him and Jorge. Lloyd froze, red as a tomato, watching Jorge stare at the mistletoe on the ground.

Jorge turned to Lloyd, and then glanced behind him. Jay’s voice echoed from the living room.

“Is this why—“

How embarrassing! Lloyd wasn’t going to let him hear that. He wrapped the mistletoe in an energy shield and rose it above Jorge, before leaping onto him and wrapping his legs around him.

“Don’t listen to that—“

Before Jorge could even react, Lloyd planted his lips on his boyfriend. Jorge’s eyes closed after the initial shock, and he held Lloyd in his arms.

“You do know you’re supposed to cover my ears, not my lips, right?”

It took a moment for Lloyd to realize what he’d done. His palms were sweaty and his heart raced. He was so focused on getting that perfect kiss from the holiday movies he went right for the lips.

“Uh- whoops?“

“But do it again— it might work this time.”

Lloyd smiled, he loved when Jorge played along. He wrapped his free arm around his lover’s neck. Gazing into his bright eyes and falling down to his lips. Lloyd kissed him again, and it was even better than the movies.

“Ew!” Kai gagged, as the other ninja peaked into the hallway.

Okay maybe not holiday movie perfect, but it was perfect for Lloyd.

[justinewt]

For the Greater Good - TMR REWRITE Chapter Ten

[TMR REWRITE-MASTERLIST]

Previous Chapter / Next Chapter

Summary: After Teresa called WICKED on them when the group had just reached the Right Arm that same day, Minho and Grace were both abducted by the organization while their friends barely made it out. Thomas had to watch his sister and one of his closest friend get dragged onboard of the helicarrier, unable to do anything to help them. For 6 months, they were locked up in a facility and experimented on until Thomas, Newt and a back-from-the-dead Gally came to their rescue.

Words: 7.3k

Warnings: TMR Death cure spoilers, angst, mental torture, medical experiments, needles, restraints, violence

Grace tilted her head back and she stared at the overhead lights with a heavy sigh. Her muscles felt so sore. She pulled at her wrists in frustration, but she was handcuffed to a chair, in a small room with a table and another chair facing each other like the one where Janson had briefly questioned Grace and Thomas back when they got to the facility, except this room was bright and white. Her heart ached as she remembered her brother struggling against Jorge, trying to get to her and Minho to save them, calling out their names, yelling at the top of his lungs. She feared what they were going to do to her and Minho here. It had only been a day since they were taken from the Right Arm camp, which went up in flames after WICKED came. All because of Teresa. Grace heard the handle move and the door open. A guard held out the door to no other than Teresa. She dared to greet Grace with a friendly smile. She was met by a death stare.

“How are you feeling?” She sat in front of Thomas’ sister as the door was closed behind her. Grace stared at her without saying anything. Teresa sighed softly, joining her hand on the table. She was trying so hard to come off as welcoming and agreeable, but Grace would never let her forget what she did to all of them by betraying them. “If your muscles are still hurting a little, it’s normal. It should be gone in a couple days.”

“Yeah, I doubt that.” Grace finally spoke, though her words were referring instead to the knife she had stuck in their backs. She was bitter and resented Teresa. Straightening up, she asked, “Where’s Minho?”

“He is being checked by a doctor. Just like you were, when you were still passed out.”

“I want to see him.”

“I’m sorry, Grace. I don’t think Janson and Chancellor Paige will allow that.”

“Do you like that? Huh? Being WICKED’s dog?” Grace asked. She didn’t have to raise her voice very much to let her anger show. Teresa looked at her like she was sad to see her react like this, as if it was surprising after what happened.

“Look, Grace, I came here to tell you something. I’m sorry it had to happen this way, really, but… we need you to help us.”

“You need my blood, not me. Why are you even here acting like you’re trying to bargain with me? Why do you act like you care?”

“This could all be so much easier if you agree to help us.” As she was talking, the door opened, and Janson walked in. He sized up Grace and stood by the table, hands behind his back.

“She’s right. This could all be so much easier if you just agree to help us. Because you know, that if you’re being too difficult… we will take what we want from you anyhow.” He threatened her with this annoyance in his eyes contradicting the smile on his face. “We have much to do right now. We’ll deal with her later, take her to her room.”

He waved nonchalantly at Grace, and she was grabbed by two soldiers who entered as he left. They grabbed her by the arms and not giving her time to get support on her feet, she was dragged out of the room and brought down the corridors. They passed many people in white coats and continued without stopping until they reached a door. At eye level along the wall was a window that looked out into the room within. It was a small room with a single bed with white sheets and blankets and a small light wooden table against the wall, with a chair. A guard slipped a card in a slot provided for this purpose, next to the door and a beep signalled the opening of the latter. She was pushed inside. They left her in handcuffs, and she turned back to the door, which beeped again as it locked. She also realized that the window was obscured from inside the room. They could see her, but she was cut off from what was going on in the halls. She sat on the bed and let her head fall on the pillow. She had no idea what Teresa wanted to tell her. Janson had cut their conversation short after probably being too annoyed by Grace’s behaviour. She was way too angry to comply and be obedient anyway.

As the days passed, Grace felt more and more on edge. She was locked in a room in which we could observe her without her knowledge and the lights were never turned off, which made her have a lot of trouble sleeping. She wasn't doing anything the whole day and the time seemed excruciatingly long. She thought that maybe they were trying to wear her out and push her to the edge so she would be too exhausted to fight back, or maybe they were just preparing the next tortures she would be subjected to. The only time she had some interactions was when she was brought food, and even then, the guards weren’t the most talkative, or when she was taken to get some blood drawn. It was really bugging her how they were just leaving her alone. She knew something was coming, and she also knew that she wouldn’t like it, whatever it would be. After a couple weeks, she was visited again by Teresa, directly in her room this time. The door buzzed loudly, and she sat up on her bed. The woman walked in, followed by an armed soldier.

“How are you feeling?” She asked, pulling the chair away from the table and sitting down.

“Are you going to ask me that every time you talk to me?”

“I’m just being mindful. You might believe me, but I care about your wellbeing, and Minho’s.” Her voice was soft, but it wasn’t fooling Grace. “I really need to have this talk with you, and I would prefer to do it myself. Janson won’t be as patient.”

“Oh, you’re so kind.” Grace rolled her eyes, pulling at the handcuffs, looking away from Teresa.

“We have been running tests on the blood samples we collected from you, Minho, and the others. You must have notified we weren’t taking you out of your room very often. We compared—”

“Get to the fucking point already.” Grace cut her off, sighing.

“We discovered something in your blood. The enzyme your brain produces is 110 percent more efficient against the flare.” She sounded excited and happy about what she was telling her, but it was all gibberish to her ears. “Not only do your body fights off the flare, but it also controls it. It’s as if it was assimilating to your system, rendering it harmless to you. You’re more immune than anyone else we’ve seen. Even more than Thomas.”

Grace instantly looked back at Teresa when she mentioned her brother. What she was saying was somehow not very surprising. This was a theory she had ever since she saw them draw so much blood from her at the facility in the desert. And now, she had the confirmation that there was something more about her and her blood, something that was very interesting and precious to WICKED. They probably already knew about it but needed a lot of her blood to run a few more tests and be sure. In any case, they took their time doing it.

“So? What now?” Grace enquired, holding her hands tightly to keep from fidgeting with her fingers.

“We are on the right track to synthesize a cure, thanks to you, Grace.” The latter glanced at Teresa. She would never get out of here if she was their golden ticket to a cure. They would never let her go and it made her grow anxious. So anxious about what they would do to her to get it that she was petrified. “We still need to conduct a few tests, and we need to find someone to try it on but we’re positive we can do it.”

“And why are you telling me this? They don’t need my permission to make me their lab rat.” Grace spat through her gritted teeth.

“I don’t want them to hurt you, that is why.” This made her let out a chuckle. She didn’t believe her anymore. She didn’t believe she actually cared, because she jeopardized the safety of everyone to get here and to get to this. Grace surprised herself when she spoke.

“I’ll agree to help you.” She turned her head to Teresa. “But I have a couple conditions.”

“Tell me.”

“I want them to conduct tests and shit, only on me. Not on Minho, or the others. I won’t fight back… if they leave him alone. Torture me not him.”

“You won’t be tortured, Grace—”

“Don’t bullshit me, please. Just go tell them and get on with it.” She looked away, gulping quietly. Teresa said she would go talk to Paige and see what she could do, promising her to do her best but she didn’t care about her worthless promises. She didn’t meet Teresa’s gaze again when she left and had a gloomy face, staring into space, as if she had signed her death certificate. To ensure Minho’s wouldn’t be tortured by WICKED, she had negotiated that everything be done to her, without having the slightest idea of ​​how far their experiments would go and that thought alone made her feel sick to her stomach. She knew that if Minho was here, he would have never let her do this, but he wasn’t, and she didn’t want them to hurt him for the sake of science when they already had what they needed to make a cure with her. If she could ensure he would be safe, she was ready to do anything, even if it led to her death, though she prayed it wouldn’t come to that. She wanted to see her brother again. She wanted to Newt and all her friends again. She wanted to see Sonya again and get to know her, which she would never be able to do if she died at the hands of WICKED. It took until the next day for Teresa to come back. She talked to Chancellor Paige, and she had agreed to leave Minho out of this, the only condition was for Grace to never be difficult and agree to every test they would need to do. She agreed and knew it was going to be a long way to hell.

Her bare feet sinking into the snow, Grace walked on without really knowing where to go. Strangely, she didn't feel the cold, despite the fact that she wasn't wearing shoes or a jacket. Her clothes were thin, but she didn't seem to mind the temperature, which was probably in the negatives given the snow that was falling nonstop. She saw a forest straight ahead. There was nothing else on the horizon, so she headed there with a quiet step. As she approached the edge of the forest, she heard someone calling her, which caused her to go deeper into the woods, so that soon she found herself in the shade of the trees and of their tall, thick foliage. She walked blindly, following the voice that echoed around her. She only realized after getting too far into the forest that the snow had disappeared around her. She stepped on a branch that creaked under her foot. Suddenly, everything became silent, and the atmosphere changed drastically. The air became heavy and thick, and she found it harder and harder to breathe. Gasping for air, she held her hands to her throat and collapsed.

She was choking and there was nothing she could do. She closed her eyes for a second and as she tried to take deep breaths, she felt water seep through her nose and mouth and found herself banging furiously against a glass wall. This time, she felt the coldness in the water she was immersed in, right down to her bones. She wanted to hold her breath but the water she had already breathed made her cough and take deeper breaths. His vision was blurring. She no longer had the strength to hit the glass in front of her and her body shook with a brutal spasm, then another and she felt like falling into an abyssal void. Everything was dark around her. She let go and opened her eyes when she heard the heartbreaking cry of a Griever. Without thinking she took a deep breath and felt air fill her lungs, but the relief was short lived. She got up and quickly realized that she was in the labyrinth, in the middle of the night. She didn't even try to understand the meaning of everything that was happening, as if it seemed normal. There was a second screech that echoed through the corridors of the maze, and she began to run at full speed, not even knowing if she was getting closer to the monster or if she was moving away from it. She didn't care about being barefoot, she just ran breathlessly, terrified of coming face to face with one of her half-machines, half-organic creatures.

Taking a turn, she slipped and fell heavily to the ground. She felt her body go to the side and she slid into a wide gap between the platform and the wall. She screamed at the top of her lungs and fell silent when she realized that she was glued to the stone wall. She felt like her whole body was trembling from the inside. Her breath was shaky as well and she heard the metallic clinging of the Griever climbing up the wall. The creature covered her body and she found herself only inches from his head. He opened his mouth, letting out a squealing scream, bringing up a foul smell from the bowels of the earth. She closed her eyes as hard as she could and turned her head to the side, her face distorted with fear, and screamed. When she opened her eyes again, it took her a few seconds to stop and realize where she was. Her throat hurt like hell, but with a quick look around reminded her that she was not back in the maze. She heard the voice of a scientist rise in the room. She was barely catching her breath, her eyes wide from what she had been put through. After a minute, she was taken out of whatever machine she was in and carried to a bed. Her whole body felt drained of any ounce of energy that she ever had, as if she had turned into a ragdoll. She was strengthless. Her arms hanging loosely along the bed, she stared above her, breathing weakly.

The bed she was moved around on was pushed against a wall. Her vision was still blurry, but she could make out the shapes of several people, busy around her. She felt her arms being lifted and then rested on the sides of the bed. Her eyes moved slowly, and she tried to focus and follow some of the movements. She watched as plastic bags were hooked to IV poles on each side of her bed. One of the pouches contained a liquid that appeared to be translucent and the others a dark red liquid. She guessed the many tubes she could see linked the bags to her body, but she couldn't feel anything. The noises of machines and the words exchanged around her mixed in an incessant buzzing as if she was surrounded by a thousand bees. She saw someone lean over her and place a mask over her face. She took a breath, and her eyes grew heavier and heavier, until they closed completely, and she let herself sink in the dark again.

She did everything they asked of her, and she was still not allowed to see Minho, but Teresa assured he was being taken care of and not tested on. She didn’t trust her, but she had to take her word for it since she couldn’t check for herself. The only thing to do was hoping they were keeping their word. With Grace in their hands, it didn’t take the scientists as long as she thought to try and see if their vaccine actually cured people from the flare. What would take a little more time would be to see how long the cure they made was effective before they got sick again, if they got sick again at all, because there was a world where it did work out perfectly and in which Grace turned out to be the source of the cure for all of humanity. If it was the world they were in, Grace would be condemned to serve as their supply for the creation of this vaccine and would never see the light of the sun ever again. She would be sucked dry by these vampires, but they would act as if they were so grateful of her sacrifice. The sacrifice of a 17-year-old girl who happened to be more immune to the flare than others. To her great misfortune. But if they had gotten Thomas as well, he would be subjected to the exact same treatment and she didn’t want that, though she didn’t want to die for those greedy, selfish people either. While she was plunged into a vegetative state for months at a time, she only dreamed of one thing.

Getting out of there and seeing her brother and friends again.

She wanted to have another chance at life. She wanted to be more than what they saw in her. Maybe, if she could make it out of there alive, she could also see if anything could come out of that spark she felt when meeting Sonya.

Grace wasn’t really being told anything anymore and she couldn’t even get out of bed. She had been transferred to a bigger room where she was strapped to a sort of hospital bed, her arms stretched out to the sides. So many tubes were connected to the crooks of her elbows, the backs of her hands and really, wherever they could stick a needle, they had. She was bedridden and fed through a tube that had been inserted in her skin and into her stomach and an oxygen mask was sometimes slapped on her face to put her to sleep. When she was conscious and awake, she wasn't even fully aware of what was going on around her anyway. She just had this blurry, constant vision of masked people in white coats bustling around her. Usually, it was pretty quiet and when they did speak, she couldn't make out half the words, but she guessed they might be speaking way more when she was asleep, which she was most of the time.

“Can you hear me?” Teresa spoke to her softly, sitting across from her. Grace did hear her. She was physically unable to respond, her whole body feeling numb like she was still feeling the effects of the aesthetics and drugs that they used on her even though she had been brought here for some time already. She couldn’t tell how long it had been since they put her in this room, on this chair with Teresa. Grace looked terrible. She looked exhausted and sick, a dull grayish complexion on her face. It looked like she was asleep with her eyes open, her cuffed hands stretched out in front of her on the table. If there hadn't been a backrest on her chair, she would have collapsed to the floor without a doubt. Even though she couldn’t react very much, she listened to Teresa.

“There’s a little girl here. Her name is Shai Lun. She’d been infected for three weeks but, Grace… you saved her.”

Although her body remained still, her chest heaving at each weak breath she took, Grace looked up tiredly at Teresa. Hearing this, a glimmer of hope passed through her eyes. If what she was saying was true, maybe her sacrifice would have served some purpose, and saved this little girl. Teresa saw the way she looked at her and gave her a smile, nodding.

“We’ve had her here for observation for weeks now. You saved her. And you can save so many others. Everything we’re doing here, it’s working.” Her smile stretched at the joy that this statement brought her. “Do you understand? That’s why this is so important.”

Hoping that Grace would say something to her made Teresa greatly disappointed when the later just looked down at the table again. She sighed and stood up.

“I just wanted you to know.”

“Teresa.” When she turned her back to her, Grace called her name so softly it almost sounded like a whisper.

“Grace?” She asked as if she thought she had dreamed being called out to. She approached and leaned gently towards her. The girl lifted her head slightly, looking up at Teresa. Grace swallowed harshly, her throat feeling so sore and parted her lips.

“Minho… let me see him… please…” She had to speak directly into Teresa's ear, the sound of her voice being so low. Pronouncing these 6 words had already almost made her breathless. Teresa straightened up and nodded, unable to promise her that this meeting would actually happen. Two guards then came in and grabbed Grace by the arms, lifting her up from the chair and moving her out of the room. Her body hanged from their hand like she was just a rag, and she was brought to a single room which she recognized to be the one she was in before they started actively experimenting on her. The guards put her on the bed, lying on her right side and connected her handcuffs to chains tied to the feet of the bed. The chain was so short she couldn’t even think of rolling over, but she didn’t have the energy to do so anyway. She stared at the window across the wall. She couldn’t see what was going on in the hallways but anyone stopping by could watch her in the room. It was the least of her worries. Grace closed her eyes and she was so tired that despite the bright, white lights on the ceiling, she managed to fall asleep almost instantly.

When she woke up, Grace let out a yawn so big it felt like her jaw was dropping. She winced. Her mouth hurt. She straightened up with difficulty leaning on her forearm to bring her face closer to her hands and touched her mouth with her fingertips. She hissed when she touched actual wounds. Her lips were so dry and irritated that the corners of her mouth were cracked. Maybe that played in why Teresa looked at her with so much concern in her eyes when they met. Or maybe this was just an impression and Teresa didn't care about how awful Grace looked. Her eyes then went down her hands and arms. She knew they had been drawing blood from her for a while now, sticking needles wherever they could but she hadn’t realized how bad it was. There were large, dark blue-purple bruises all over her skin. A squeal escaped her lips, and she felt her body shake. Seeing those bruises covering nearly every square inch of her skin shocked her and she felt her stomach churn. She felt sick and a sudden wave of heat came over her upper body. It was as if she was burning up and she collapsed onto the floor with a grunt, staring at the ceiling, in pain. Her breaths fastened.                                                            

From the corner of her eyes, she saw a guard being hurried inside the room to detach the chain from the handcuffs. Seeing these two people come in gave her an idea. She felt something cold being pressed against her shoulder and she quickly felt her body and breathing relax.

“How long did I asleep?” She asked faintly.

“You’ve slept since your meeting with Teresa, this morning. You needed the rest.” The woman gave her a smile and helped her sit at the table against the wall. She showed no resistance and let herself be handled, swiftly stealing her access card from her pocket. Surprisingly, the doctor then told the guard to remove her handcuffs as the girl wasn’t going anywhere in her state. While she had her back turned, Grace let herself fall against the backrest of the chair and slipped the card at her waist, held in place by the elastic of her pants. If she tried to escape from this place, she might need this card to even get out of this room in the first place. The guard took her handcuffs off and remained in the room to watch her while the woman walked to the door. She reached for her card but didn’t find it and she patted her pockets, not understanding where it could have gone. She motioned for the guard to open for her and left. A couple minutes later, someone came in carrying a food tray. It was placed in front of Grace and after she ate, the doctor came back, this time sending the guard on his way so she could check on Grace’s bruises. A kidney plate on the table caught his eye. His arms were outstretched, one on the table the other in the doctor's hands. Grace pushed the tray over the edge of the table, exaggerating the exhaustion she was in to make it seem accidental. Cotton balls rolled on the floor.

“Sorry.” Grace breathed out.

“It’s all right. I’ll take care of it.” The woman turned her back to her and bent over to gather the cotton balls and the other stuff that fell from the tray. Grace had a sudden burst of energy, and she immediately grabbed a syringe from another tray and a small bottle of drugs. She didn't take the time to read the label and just filled the syringe with it before stabbing the needle in the woman lower back. She injected the liquid and watch her body drop to the floor. Grace had no idea if she was really unconscious, but she stood up. Her legs almost gave out beneath her, and she caught herself on the table before straightening up and dropping down beside the woman lying there. She took off her white blouse and shoes. The teenage girl then put all that on and got up, not without much difficulty, leaning on the back of the chair.

“This is useless, you know?” Grace glanced over her shoulders and shrugged, breathing heavily.

“I gotta try.” She said standing at her full height facing the door, trying to hide the colossal amount of effort that it took her not to fall right here and there. She slipped the card into the slot next to the door. It buzzed open and she stepped out in the hallway of the medical wing, where she had spent day after day for the past few months. She had never put so much focus on something as basic as walking but placing one foot in front of the other while standing without any support seemed so hard. She felt her legs shaking and the thought of collapsing in the hallway terrified her, so she forced herself to keep going when she heard the doctor's voice coming from her room. The latter was shouting at a guard to go after her and in the blink of an eye she was pinned down, the guard's knee pressing against her back while he held her bruised arms with a strong grip. Being on the floor was almost relaxing after trying so hard to walk, if it weren't for the pain she was being put through. The fatigue came back in a second and she didn’t even realize when she passed out. She opened and closed her eyes without being able to move a finger and that blurry vision was back. She heard voices around her but the words were confused and sounded deafened and all she could really tell was that she was lying on some sort of bed, in a room she didn't know. Her eyes half open she saw an orange light swirling in the corridors, not knowing what was going on. It was as if not only was her body asleep again, but her mind and senses were also functioning in slow motion. She felt a pressure somewhere on her body, but she was so numb she couldn’t tell where it came from though, she recognized the pressure of a syringe. She slowly realized she was coming out of whatever they had used to sedate her a moment prior when she heard glass breaking sharply on the floor and loud grunting as if there was fight going on. The sounds became clearer as the grunting turned into yelling and she almost fell off the bed when she tried to get up. She felt strong hands catching her in her fall and as she was helped up, she saw Thomas’ face and couldn’t believe it.

“Thomas.” She didn’t care about the pain that continuously shot through her bruised limbs and wrapped her arms around her brother with a sob. Newt and Minho were panting from the effort the fights required, standing there a few feet away from the siblings just reuniting. They joined in the hug after Grace gave them a look when she noticed them in the room. She also gave them each a hug and upon turning back to Thomas, she saw him staring at her arms in shock. Taking a step back, she hit the bed and looked at the three boys. Newt and Minho had also just seen the state in which WICKED had left her and she couldn't help but look away. Seeing what her arms looked like made her sick to her stomach but seeing the guilt in their eyes made her feel even worse. She thought of telling them she was fine, but she couldn’t even resort herself to saying such blatant lies. She felt dizzy and her body was weak, barely able to stand on her own.

“Grace—”

“It’s— I didn’t want them to experiment on you.” She said in one breath, wrapping her arm around her stomach, holding her side. She patted lightly when she felt a bandage under her T-shirt. For a split second she wondered what they had done to her, and she quickly remembered that she had spent most of her last months hooked up to machines, a tube in her stomach to feed her. Not one of them really said anything. All three of them were at an abyssal loss of words. Thomas looked around and grabbed one of the doctors lying dead and lifted the body, grabbing it by the collar to pull off its white coat and put it around Grace's shoulders. She couldn't hide the pain that shot through her arms as she tucked them into the sleeves and closed her eyes so as not to see the way the boys were staring at her.

“Let’s get them out of here.” Thomas glanced at Newt and nodded. He helped Grace to walk out of the room but as they came around the corner of the corridor, a bunch of soldiers spotted them and yelled in their direction. Grace barely had time to realize, she let out a gasp when she was suddenly lifted off the floor and found herself in Thomas's arms as the boys ran in the opposite direction. She clung to Thomas and watched the soldiers chasing them with dread on her tired face. As they fled, she met Janson's gaze and felt her heart skip a beat, holding her breath until he left her field of vision. They were desperately trying to shake off Janson and the soldiers but came to a halt when the latter came from in front of them. Grace ducked her head in Thomas’ neck when they fired in their direction. Minho urged them to get into the room to their right and slammed the door shut and locking it. Janson could be heard grunting as he banged on the door furiously. Thomas took a look around the room while Newt and Minho knocked over a piece of furniture across the door to block it. They backtracked against the large bay window overlooking the rest of the city. Grace stared at the door anxiously, trying to stay calm but with the fatigue and pain she was in, she was kind of all over the place.

“Oh, shit…” Thomas swore as they heard loud steps on the other side of the door. Janson really wanted that door open for the sole reason that he felt so entitled to what was in their blood and the cure that could come out of it. Though she was scared shitless, Grace knew that now that Thomas had her back, WICKED was going to have to keep their claws off her. Grace gulped as she heard a drill whirring. They were trying to saw through the lock on the door to open it.

“Any ideas?” Minho enquired while he and Newt stared at the door, sparks flying inside the room. Grace followed Thomas gaze as he turned to the window and looked down. He showed the pool beneath them and stepped aside, still carrying his sister in his arms while Newt and Minho threw a huge canister at the window, shattering the glass. He put Grace on her feet, holding her firmly by the waist and all four of them stood on the edge, watching the canister fall heavily into the water.

“It’s doable.” Thomas said, glancing at his sister and friend. In other circumstances, Grace would have laughed when she saw Minho’s doubtful face. “Just need a little running start.” Thomas was the first to walk towards the middle of the room, swiftly taking his sister back in his arms since she couldn't run, even for such a short distance. He told her to hold on tight and she clung to him, ignoring the pain that shot through her bruised hands, staring fearfully through the window, taking breaths to try to calm down.

“You sure about this?” Minho asked.

“Not really.” He saw the look on Grace’s face and added; “it’s gonna be okay.”

“Nice pep talk.”

“Yeah, we’re all bloody inspired.” Newt added sarcastically.

The sound of the saw stopped, and Grace turned her head towards the door. There was a silence for a couple of seconds before they started ramming the door. The door banged open, and Janson stepped over the furniture on the floor to get in the room. Thomas swore under his breath and the three boys ran for it and jumped out the window. He shouted, telling Grace to hold her breath but she didn't have time to process what he said and what was happening. She screamed her brother’s name as they fell. She opened her eyes underwater, blinded by this cloud of bubbles and this deaf sound that was her voice. In a matter of less than a second, the nightmares she had of herself drowning came back and she panicked. She was pulled out by Thomas and desperately gasped for air, coughing dryly, and wincing at the sensation of her nose and throat sore from breathing in water. He tightened his grip of her and pushed the hair sticking to her face, reassuring her. She calmed down but had no control over the cough she was seized with. Thomas gave the middle finger to Janson, who was watching them from the windowsill and the group swam to shore. Grace let Thomas pull her with him, out of breath. Only when he put her on the edge of the pool before he even got out of the water, did she realize she was sobbing, panting, coughing and shaking all at once. He pulled Minho and Newt out of the water and helped Grace get on her feet when soldiers ordered them to stay where they were, their machine guns aiming at them. There weren’t many options, so they obliged. While staring at the soldiers, Thomas whispered to Grace to help her calm down. He tried to reach for the handgun at his thigh, but they saw him, advising him not to do that.

“Get on your knees with your hands in the air.” Grace gasped loudly and widened her eyes when one of the soldiers started firing at his peers, stunning them with the electric shots. Once they were all down, he came towards them and took off his mask. Her jaw dropped when she saw Gally standing right in front of them.

“Minho. Grace.” He nodded at them before looking up the building. “You guys are nuts.”

“I’ll explain later.” Thomas then told Minho and his sister, who looked at each other in shock before walking away. Grace heavily relied on her brother’s support to walk along them. She could feel her legs almost giving way with every step. It took so much energy from her; she would have never been able to walk on her own. She barely managed to take deep breaths. Sneaking through the city was really not easy on her. They slid on the ground, hiding from the soldiers looking for them. Thomas sat her down against the grove's half wall, in between him and Gally. She held her arms with a low moan of pain through her teeth. She almost felt even more drained than back there.

“Well, they’re definitely pissed.” Gally declared.

“How far are the tunnels?” Thomas enquired as he took off his soaked gloves, looking at his sister with concern. She was way calmer now, but he could tell she was in a lot of pain, on top of being exhausted.

“Uh, maybe blocks from here.” They all looked ahead of them upon hearing Newt, who was a few feet away, sitting next to Minho, started coughing his lungs out. Grace stared at him, not understanding what was wrong with him at first but when it clicked, her face dropped, and she felt her heart and stomach sank to her feet. It couldn’t be. He couldn’t be infected. They were supposed to be immune to this. Gally looked at the two siblings. “We can make it.”

Thomas didn’t say anything. Him and Gally crouched behind the wall, on the look out but she kept staring at Newt. She had just reunited with her friends, and she was faced with the realization that one of them was dying and that she could save him with all the fucking vaccines or whatever that they made using her, but they needed time to get said cure. She was so focused on the fact that Newt was dying that she completely overlooked the reappearance of Gally. Minho came towards them.

“Hey. How long has he been like this?”

“He’ll be okay. We just gotta get to Brenda.” Thomas said, taking off his jacket. “She’s got the serum. Come on, let’s go.”

Thomas tried to help his sister get up, but she pushed him away, telling him to take care of Newt. Minho and Gally, or either of them, could help her. They watched him catch Newt as he almost fell over and walked away. Until then, she hadn't really cared about the sticky feel of her soaked clothes on her skin, but she suddenly couldn't bare it anymore and leaned forward, moaning from the pain as she tried to pull the blouse off.

“Hey, hey, hey. Take it easy, Grace. Don’t hurt yourself.” Minho hastened to stop her and helped her take off the blouse. Gally's eyes slid down her arms as she fell back against the low wall. Like every single one of them when they saw all the bruises, he couldn’t help but stare in shock, though he tried to control his expression, she could tell in his eyes. He was taken out of his stupor by Minho’s voice. “Why you helping us, Gally? I put a spear through your chest.”

“Yeah. Nobody’s perfect, man.” He shrugged it off and was about to help Grace up but a quick look from Minho was enough to make Gally understand that he got this so the latter just stood up, patting him on the shoulder and walked off.

“Can you stand?” She nodded and he put her arm around his shoulder, holing her by the waist and they just started following Gally and Thomas when she spoke with a faint voice.

“Minho… did they do something to you?”

“They put me through a bunch of simulations, but they only did it a couple of time.”

“Okay. Good…” She nodded, resting her eyes as they walked. She was relieved to hear that Teresa did keep her word and stopped the experiments on him and the others.

“What did you do, Grace?” His question got her to look at him from the corner of her eyes and the silence that followed pushed her to say something. Her brother and Newt were far ahead but not Gally. She knew he would hear but it wasn't that much of a problem. She just didn't want Thomas to know about all this. For now, anyway. On the way, she proceeded to tell him about the day Teresa came to talk to her, trying to get her to cooperate, and she ended up agreeing to do all this and that her only condition to this was for them to leave Minho alone and not use him for any experiments of any kind. She could tell he was upset to hear all this, but the guilt outweighed it. He came out of this safe and sound because she took it all on her. She didn’t have to tell him about how they drew her blood almost every day, leaving her bedridden and in a medically induced coma for a while. She didn’t tell him about the anxiety-inducing nightmares of her drowning or about how sick she gets when she looks at her arms now.

“Anyway… I’ll recover from this.”

“They tortured you—”

“And I agreed to it. It was a shit decision, but it doesn’t matter…” She shook her head, letting out a sigh. “You should go help Thomas with Newt.”

“Grace, you can barely walk on your own.”

“I’ll help her.” Gally turned to them and pushed by Grace, Minho went ahead and put Newt’s arm around his shoulder. She took a step forward and it was enough for her to lose her balance and catch herself on the arm that Gally held out to her. They resumed their walk and stopped in their tracks again, watching an explosion occur further ahead of them. “We’re supposed to take down WICKED, not the whole damn city.”

“Gally, come on.” Thomas urged him to continue on their way and Grace had to wait for him to follow them and looked up at him observing the fire left by the explosion. He didn't seem so thrilled with how far this was going but she didn’t really care. She already had a hard time with Gally back in the Glade and she still wasn’t too fond of him, but he seemed nicer than he used to be. If someone had told her that she would stop hating Gally one day and that he would even go so far as helping her out, she wouldn’t have believed it. When you remember how he ran after her and she taunted him from the top of a tree after she tried out for the Builders during the first week, she would have never thought she would even accept help from him.

[To be continued…]  

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Published (26/06/2023) by Andrea

Taglist: @cathrin2405​ @kika64

[mazegays]

could've followed my fears all the way down

Chapter 17

Chapters: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 18

The first few days are easy. Familiar. They’ve gone out scouting this far before, and there are little paths worn in from use. The weather is kind to them, but they’ve got plastic sheets for when it starts to rain; their sunny days won’t hold forever.

 Sonya points out the different plants they’ve tried in the greenhouse, to see if they’re edible at all.

Most of them aren’t, which sucks, because they could really use more easily-accessible food sources.

Thankfully, none of the ‘testers’ (mostly just Sonya, and whoever else she can get to try it.) have died from any of the plants. They collect what they can and eat most of it themselves.

Thomas’s food pack has to last a lot longer than theirs. 

“What do you think you’ll find, Thomas?”

“More plants, hopefully. I’m thinking if we’ve scared off any deer around here, but maybe if it’s just me, I’ll see some. I wonder if Frypan knows how to make jerky.”

“I don’t think there’s anything he’s not willing to try making, at least.”

“Good that.” Thomas laughs. “We’ll split tomorrow morning, then. Are you going right back?” They’d made better time than he’d planned for. 

“No, we’ve got a few things around here to take a look at first. I haven’t been out this far before. Have you, Aris?”

“This is the first time I’ve been in here for more than a few minutes. I wanted a change from fishing every morning.” He explains. Thomas hadn’t even realized that Aris was fishing every morning; it explains why he hasn’t seen much of him at dinner. He’s pretty sure that Aris has to be up, like, stupid early for fishing.

“When will you get back, Thomas? I know Aris and I plan on being back in three or four days. How much food do you have?”

“I’ve got enough for three days out here and the trip back. I’ll be fine. Don’t worry about me. I’ve got a good handle on running in the woods now, too. If it comes to that I’ll run back. I’ll be maybe a week behind you.”

“What do I tell Minho and Gally about why you’re not with us?” She challenges.

He’d really hoped she wouldn’t say that.

“That you lost me? No, don’t tell them that. They’ll flip out. Tell them I was an idiot who went off on his own. They’ll believe that.”

“You can’t avoid them forever, Thomas.”

“I don’t want to. But it’s better if I do.” 

“How long should we wait?” Aris asks. “If you don’t come back?”

“I’ll come back.”

“Will you want to?”

“Yes, Aris, I’ll come back. I was never planning on not coming back— ” Not this time, anyway, “— but this will be easier with just me. We won’t have enough food for all three of us, or even two of us.”

“You planned it that way, Thomas, don’t try and fool us.” Sonya sighs, tugging him over so he’s sitting next to her. “I don’t know why you’re trying to run away from them, from yourself, but it’s not going to work long-term. You’re going to crash and burn eventually, or one of them will. You can come back with us. I don’t think Jorge really expects you to stay out here alone that long.”

“I’ll be okay, Sonya. I’m not running, I promise. I just need to think.”

“And you can’t do that around everyone else?”

No, he can’t trust himself not to tell them everything.

He doesn’t even know what ‘everything’ entails yet. It’s not worth saying something and then finding out he actually felt the opposite.

He doesn’t want to do that to them.

And, he reminds himself, there’s the matter of Rosa— who won’t believe him when he says he’s not being abused, which he hasn’t told anyone about.

She had, however, led him to realize how much happier they were when he wasn’t around.

It was better this way. Minho and Gally could sort things out without him in the way, and he could get over himself alone, with no one else having to deal with his issues.

With him.

Sonya stares at him, hard, like she can read his thoughts.

She’d probably knock him out and drag him back if she could.

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The shadows of the canopy are barely there when he leaves the next morning. This deep in, he can hardly see the sky, but he knows Sonya and Aris won’t be up until sunrise at least.

He’s not going to risk the chance of them convincing him not to go on. He’ll have to move more slowly at first, and watch his step very carefully, but by the time they wake they won’t be able to follow him.

He’s so focused on going as far as he can, getting away from everything, that he nearly forgets to stop and eat.

His body doesn’t allow that for long, so he finds a good spot— near berries that look edible but aren’t ones he’s seen before.

He wraps a handful up in cloth and tucks them away. Someone might recognize them when he gets back.

Thomas moves more slowly in the afternoon, taking in everything around him; different plants, more than one he knows is edible—he digs a couple of each up carefully and wraps the roots.

More food sources are never a bad thing.

Still, he doesn’t find much else that day; no animals other than birds or squirrels.

It’s lonelier than he thought it would be, out here.

Yeah, it’s kind of nice, peaceful, but… the solitude is itching at him already.

The white-walled room, the treadmill, the inconsistent meals

He can’t think about that now.

He’ll just keep a routine. He’ll leave shortly after sunrise each morning, eat lunch when the sun is highest, and then settle in right when dusk starts to fall.

That will help.

Minho tries running on his own, but even though he’s allowed to now, it just feels wrong. He’s used to having Thomas by his side, used to finding his balance with a hand on Thomas’s shoulder or back when he stumbles, used to Thomas doing the same on him.

He can’t do it.

It’s… it’s not the same. And it’s not as if he could run with Gally, because Gally’s still hurt, and would probably laugh at him if he suggested it in the first place.

Minho would ask Harriet or Sonya, but Sonya’s still on the scouting trip with Thomas and Aris and Harriet’s got enough on her hands.

So he doesn’t run. He can take a few days off, he reasons, just until Thomas gets back.

“Stop acting weird, shank.” Gally throws a pillow at his head. “So you don’t want to run. Have you considered walking? A nice stroll, perhaps?”

“Shut up, asshole.” That’s one of Minho’s favorite new words. Sometimes the adults get all huffy about it if he uses it around them, though. Why’d they teach it to them if they didn’t expect them to use it? Seems dumb.

“Min, seriously, you’re driving me crazy with all of your pacing around. You need to go and do something, man.”

He doesn’t want to leave Gally alone, though. He knows that Gally would be okay without him, but the ache in his chest when he thinks about Thomas (he knows it shouldn’t be so strong; it’s only been a few days, but he wants to see Thomas again. And talk to him, and take naps together, and tease Gally together, and eat together.) is only lessened when he’s with Gally.

Minho’s not going to read into that too much right now. All he knows is that he doesn’t want to leave Gally alone, but he can’t settle down, either.

“You know what I would suggest if we were back in the Glade?” Gally’s smirking when he looks at him.

“Yeah,  I think I do.” Of course, he’d be doing all the work, Gally can’t do anything right now.

“I mean, if you want to…” 

He does want to. Kind of. He and Gally never did this sort of thing together, but they’ve both heard things about each other.

“What if we get caught?”

“That never bothered you before, from what I know.”

“It was different, in the Glade. It was only boys our age.” When Chuck had come up in the box, those of them who were typically louder (Alby and Newt) and more likely to fool around in easily-accessible places either quieted down or moved somewhere else. If Chuck hadn’t been so damn curious and wanting to get into everything, it wouldn’t have been a problem. At least, not as much of a problem as it was. But the kid would sneak up on you no matter what he thought you were doing, and privacy was almost a foreign concept to him at first.

“So?”

“So I don’t want Anya or Harriet to walk in on me sucking your dick, Gally.”

“Oh, is that what you wanted to do?” Gally motions for him to come closer to the bed. “I was mostly joking. I don’t think I’d be up for much of that anyway. You could take a nap, though. You haven’t been sleeping at night.”

“Yeah, I know.” Both of them have been having bad nightmares since Thomas left. All of the things they try not to worry about during the day only come back to haunt them in the middle of the night.

When Minho wakes up again, he’s back on the Burg. He can tell because even after days, twisting his back in certain ways burns.

He can tell because Newt’s here, and Teresa, and a group of girls in the corner.

He can tell because Thomas isn’t. Which means that…

It means that WCKD has killed him.

He’s going to have to live without Thomas.

Minho doesn’t know why that loss hits him so much harder than the others he’s faced recently. He hasn’t even known Thomas that long. A month, at most.

But he already knows he doesn’t want to live without him.

He tells the others what he’s thinking, what he thinks WCKD did, but it almost feels like it’s not him.

And then Ratman brings out Thomas’ body.

‘Something’s not right. This isn’t how it goes.’

He ignores the thought, because Thomas is dead and Minho’s decisions killed him. Minho killed him.

Not in the same way he killed Gally, not directly, but he killed him. And he’s going to have to live with that.

He doesn’t want to live with that.

‘This is wrong.’

Yes, it is wrong, because Thomas isn’t here. Thomas should be here. Minho should have picked someone else, he should have chosen.

But he couldn’t do that, could he? He couldn’t pick another of his friends to die. At least this way, he didn’t name anyone.

‘Minho, wake up!’

He is awake. He just really wishes he wasn’t. If he weren’t awake, then he wouldn’t have to face the fact that Thomas is dead. His body’s right there, Minho could go and touch it if he wanted to.

He doesn’t want to.

Doesn’t want to think about Thomas like he’s dead.

He wonders if the others will leave him here, if he asks. 

(He already knows they won’t.)

Minho sits on the floor, facing away from the evidence of what he’s done, and waits for WCKD’s next move.

It’s all he can do now, anyway.

‘MINHO, WAKE UP!’

This time, he listens.

“Minho!” Minho flings an arm out to let Gally know he’s awake. “What was that about?”

“Mmmm, give me a minute.” It hadn’t felt like a nightmare, but apparently he had been reacting like it was one.

“You were, like, crying in your sleep, Min. I’ve never seen you do that before.”

“It was after the Scorch.” Minho sits up, wiping at his face. He doesn’t think he’s cried during nightmares before; Thomas hasn’t said anything if he has. “They separated us and had us all do these different trials. Mine was picking someone for them to kill. I refused, but when they brought me back to the main room, Thomas wasn’t there. He was gone longer than anyone else, and I thought--we all thought--that they’d killed him. They hadn’t, clearly, but in the nightmare they had. Ratman even brought us his body.

“It didn’t feel like a nightmare, though. It felt like I was still there. Like that’s where I was supposed to be. There was something telling me that it was wrong, but I didn’t listen because of course it felt wrong, they’d killed Thomas and it was my fault.”

“That’s… that’s a rough one, Minho.” Gally says. “I don’t know what to tell you.”

“That’s okay. I don’t know what to say after nightmares, either. Especially when it’s something like that.”

“Would it be better if Thomas was here?”

“Yeah, but he’s off on his little mission. Why do you think he keeps leaving us behind?” Minho knows Thomas trusts them. He knows Thomas likes them, but he can’t figure out why Thomas keeps running away from them.

“I don’t know. It’s frustrating, though. If he just stayed put, we could talk things out, and we’d be okay.” Gally takes his hand, and Minho moves to lie at the top of the bed with him without more urging. 

“Good luck with that. I don’t think Thomas knows how to stop. I don’t think he even knows how to slow down.” Not that Minho’s much better at it. It’s been really hard, forcing himself to remember that he’s not in constant danger these days. He doesn’t have anything to solve, nothing to be looking out for. 

“If anyone can out-stubborn him, it’s us.” Gally points out. “He’s our boy, alright? And we’ll take care of him.”

“Yeah. Yeah, I like the sound of that.”

It might just take some time before they can convince Thomas that he doesn’t have to be trying to fix everything all the time.

Shuck, they’ll have to learn together.

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