#but creating and sharing makes me happy
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I would love to see your backstage of making your vampire story <3 how you take your photos, chose perspectives, plan dialogues. please tell about your process
Hello, Friend of Mystery!!
Happy New Year and thank you for this ask! I'm a very small-time simmer in this corner of the interwebz filled with really talented and artistic simblrs, so I appreciate the question and interest!
Now, backstage! The method to the madness!
I usually have an idea: it's a loose- general idea of the direction and mood of the plot and dialogue. I don't like to be too specific unless I have a clear pose in mind for a scene. The thought process might be something like, "Lawrence and Julian are going to have a talk about vampires and technology in this scene, but act flirty with each other while they do so."
I go into the game to organize the setting and choose outfits/props. MCCC and Wonderful Whims are game-changers for posing. I'm a terrible builder, so I end up spending a lot of time browsing the gallery or searching for builds and objects by skilled folks. That part is often fun. Imagining the potential of lots and cc is a big part of gaining admission to the mental asylum expressing creativity in this game! Depending on the story I am working on, I may have mods like Underworld running to make sure it always looks like nighttime in my environments.
I use Reshade. It saves me time when editing and gives the images lovely depth, shading, and coloring that otherwise isn't there. I use different presets that I screw around with and tweak, but some favorites are Marigold and Senshi 4.0. Shadows and lighting are super important and can make or break a scene.
Once I have my image, I'll tweak it in Photoshop. Thanks to Reshade, it's usually just to quickly fix something, like clipping or rough edges.
I use Canva to organize my stories and write in the dialogue, but that's always dangerous because my inner middle-schooler wants to unleash a million stickers everywhere and ruin the edits. Ask me how many times I've stuck googly eyes on Lawrence and cackled at my own idiocy ingenuity!
I write while I am taking pictures. The sequence is: pose, take the picture, edit the image, write, and on to the next scene. I used to take all the images first and write afterward but found that sometimes a pose or screenshot would unexpectedly convey a different take on an idea, reaction, or character- or even inspire a different direction for the dialogue in a scene. It's easier for me to adapt the dialogue to an image than vice versa. I feel that writing as I go, while my game is open and ready gives me more flexibility and freedom to make changes.
???
Profit!
Ok, now-sorry- for real. I download everything, usually save it as a draft, wait a bit to see if I catch any big mistakes, and then post.
I actually struggle with serious self-doubt and a really mean inner critic, so posting here has been an exercise in self-acceptance. Still, I often avoid checking the notifications for a while after I post because I am that nervous. But I'm happier for sharing my stuff rather than not since I have had the chance to connect with so many fun and talented people here!
That's it!
Thank you for the ask on this first day of the year! It made me super happy! All the best to you!! ❤️
#answered asks#friend of mystery!#i know my skills are very limited#but creating and sharing makes me happy#and this ask made me feel like maybe it makes other folks a little happy too.#and that is what it is all about
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Based on my favorite gif lately
#my art stuff#digital art#baldurs gate 3#bg3#astarion#batstarion#once again specifying this is a spawn astarion with some sort of wild shape thing#bat#good morning#gif#I’ve been in such a weird place mentally about art lately#I just keep stopping myself from drawing things cus I want to draw Astarion -#- but fsr my brain decided I draw him wrong and thus makes it pointless to even start#bat form is fine - I have no problems with it. But in his normal form? no can do buckaroo.#It’s one part why I haven’t shared much art lately - I don’t get happy enough about the “quality”#then just don’t share it as a result - in turn making me feel worse because I’m not posting - making me doubt myself more - etc etc#idk man - I got way too giddy earlier today cus someone could tell this was Astarion - even though this isn’t even the version of him I -#- feel insecure about#I keep seeing these artists making more realistic art and cool comics and interactions - most of which are shaded really beautifully -#- and all I can think about is how I CAN’T do that - even if it wouldn’t fuck me up mentally#I just put too much stress on my ability to create realism and I keep “failing” at doing that (by actively avoiding it for my own health)#idk man - I just wish I felt better about Astarion’s stupid chin OTL
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The 5 Stages of Grief ft. Charlie Slimecicle
Stage 1: Denial
Stage 2: Anger
Stage 3: Bargaining
and
Stage 4: Depression or is it Anger again? I honestly can’t tell, but I’m pretty sure he cares about his child now…
Stage 5: Acceptance?
At least for now…
EDIT:
hhahhhhaahhhahhhaaahaahhhhaaaa so much for “acceptance”
#charlie slimecicle#slimecicle#dont mind me#im just crying for a minecraft egg#CURSE YOU QUACKITY FOR CREATING SUCH ADORABLE YET FRAGILE CREATURES#it’s only been a week#qsmp#mcyt#twitter#el mariana#elmariana#ranboo#juanaflippa#flip high 🕊️🕊️#also if you’re here from my last post thank you so much#it truly means the world to me seeing others laugh over something I’ve shared#I swear not ALL of my posts will end with something sappy in the tags#but if you guys keep making me happy I gotta share my gratitude :D#and I guess no one here has twitter so#I will continue to post funny gloopy gunky guy propaganda
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#some thoughts incoming idk if i should share but i need to put them somewhere#it's hard being in the yr fandom since the finale when you don't share the same vision and opinion as the rest#and people make future wilmon posts or write post s3 fics (which many exist now) they just don't align with your idea at all#and they're not exciting to me at all and the whole concept just makes me upset#i don't wanna imagine Wille as a 'normal' person (not that that's ever possible anyway which the show loves to ignore)#like I'm sorry but i didn't come to the show to watch an ordinary love story and have them lead an ordinary life#the idea of Wille being a future king and them navigating that royal life together is so much more interesting#i hate that that isn't canon anymore and when ppl make posts about them it's not about that or that would only be seen as a negative thing#i don't wanna imagine a life where they are 'normal' that isn't appealing to me at all and it sucks seeing everyone embrace it#and it's like you're not allowed to want something else or think differently bc that makes you the bad person and you're just wrong#i can't be excited about their future (also bc i don't really see them going strong in the future with how they messed them up in s3)#(i also didn't want to know what could possibly happen in the future i wanted that to stay open and just be in the present)#and seeing everyone else excited and happy about it makes you feel horrible and very alone and disconnected in the fandom#i don't wanna take it away from them but i also would love to see other takes but that's basically impossible now#am i the only person who feels this way or are there any other who can relate? pls let me know#i already feel like ppl are gonna attack me for this but it's been hard especially now with Simon's month and seeing so many interpretation#navigating ao3 has also become difficult now#it's hard finding fics to read where wille stays crown prince and you don't have to be scared for that to change#i just can't read any canon compliant fics anymore and i hate it bc i hate to disagree with canon#i normally don't do that bc canon is important to me and i don't want to reject it and create my own fantasy#and that's what's upsetting#anyway sorry i had to write this#personal
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"No Longer You" - A Trigun Maximum Animatic
(Major Trimax Spoilers!!)
Hope you enjoy my first ever animatic!!
Music is "No Longer You" by Jorge Rivera-Herrans
From an absolutely amazing musical called "Epic"
(Also excuse my handwriting at the end lol)
#Im really happy with how this came out though! My favorite frame is probably the brothers final stand cause i love how i drew it#very happy to share this finally! as soon as i heard this song i knew i had to make it with trimax#it is my first one that ive made so excuse me if it is a bit rough#getting used to a new software and creating something in a new medium will take some work and practice to it make look good#trigun#trimax#trigun maximum#epic the musical#no longer you#epic the underworld saga#gealachs craic
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My favorite textposts I created in 2023
#I really really hate creating repeat posts since I've already posted all of these but I just wanted to share some of my favorites!#(these aren't ranked btw) Again sorry for posting these again but I really enjoy making these and I especially loved the ones above#It was very hard to choose just 30 out of the roughly 185 I've made but I didn't want to create a second part so here's just a few 🙂#Thank you all for making me feel welcome in the fandom and enjoying the things I post. It's a very nice fandom environment I really enjoy ❤#disney lab rats#lab rats#adam davenport#bree davenport#chase davenport#spike davenport#leo dooley#victor krane#donald davenport#Happy New Year everyone! 🎉
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how do creators motivate themselves to continue creating even if they're not actively receiving praise from others and feel like nobody cares abt what they create
#➳ the fool speaks#i need to make ocs people like i need to post art that others will be inspired by i need to write stories that will create an invested#fanbase. i need to edit things that'll blow up. i need to coin posts that people adore and identify with. i need my hard work to be WORTH#something other than just ''making me happy''#even just one person acting a little invested in what i create and asking me to share it with them and liking what i do#motivates me so much. but i can't just Beg people to like the things i make.
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Voted for Bumble bc of course but also if you think Alex would not pspsps Bumble you are wrong. If they could communicate they would go to therapy together /s
If then could communicate they would go to therapy together
/GEN
Kyle/Green Lantern resurrects her but then he becomes convinced that she's not the same person she was before the incident, OR SOMETHING SOMETHING Black Lanterns aren't ACTUALLY bad they're just misunderstood Grim Reaper types, in either case Alex ends up breaking it off with Kyle because they've become very different people.
And then Bumble's there
And then they go to therapy or Alex adopts Bumble, and then uhhh Bumble's like one of the superpets. Like Krypto the Superdog. Free premise go forth and play with it if ur a DC fan
#bone babble#Again I don't actually know a lot about the DC universe besides what my friend tells me#But also from reading into the Black Lanterns having them be evil sound like a WHOLE wasted opportunity#Lanterns are supposed to be emotions yeah? so why the hell are we downplaying the emotion of GRIEF?#There's a whole lot you could do with that actually. Death doesn't deserve to just be a villain of the week#And hell. You could explore some WILD emotions here about Alex becoming so much more than Kyle's tragedy#Can I still mourn you when you aren't dead?#What does it mean for me that the worst thing that ever happened to me has become an opportunity for her?#And... does this make me selfish for not being happy for her?#For not trying to understand the person she has become? for only thinking of how this impacts myself#RE: THIS IS NOT A DIG AT DC FANS#BUT I want to share that like... a reason I've kinda had a hard time getting into comics is because like... really interesting premises--#like that often get turned into Monster-of-the-Week struggles for the heroes to punch into submission#I've probably just seen really bad summaries or not found the editions that would appeal to me specifically#But it's kinda why the only DC hero I'm really interested in is Superman#Because a lot of his thing is that he's a good GUY#And that creates a lot of interesting moral questions#Like YES he's a good guy. YES he has no ulterior motive. But what if he DID?-- how can EVERYONE ELSE in the universe truly know that-#for sure?#And that's cool and I really like the snippets I've seen especially between him and batman#But anyway. so much fridging and misogyny in the world of comics has kinda turned me away from getting into it#because. VERY often. Misogyny can be... *tied* to a bit of a lack of imagination. Or empathy on behalf of a particular writer#RE: There is good stuff in DC PLEASE understand im not trying to be insulting
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I discovered just how brainrotted I am today with one simple trick! This same whiplash-inducing scenario has repeated about a dozen times now:
#no just kidding criticism is good and i love getting it i am just continuously reminded of it and it makes me...#hard to describe. it makes my body go “!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” and its both a very anxious feeling and a giddy happy feeling#but it makes me feel like i could take flight just about now#never quite realised how much i think about. characters. before now because my mind goes back to that same thing#then again i am full of nervous energy in general these days... i am making a thing and it makes me very happy#ahh codddd anyway. anyway. im glad im getting out of my comfort zone. i dont want to be hanging out there forever#i dont want to live a life where i only wistfully wonder what people may say or think about things i put my creative passion into#i want to create and i want to share and i want to make something the best it could be! the absolute best version of it#i dont want to be so flight-y and secretive forever thats no fun >:O#my art#not fish
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Sacred Heart of Jesus, Ukrainian Catholic Parish of Tolstoi, Manitoba
#manitoba#ukrainian history#tolstoï#tolstoi#catholic church#church#ukrainian culture#evidence of life#my grunkle’s family church before he left for the great wife nowhere he never liked talkies about his life before meeting tía abuela#the photos before their meeting were left in a box somewhere whenever asked to talk about but then he refused not wanting to talk about it#it makes me so emotional but im so happy he got out and grew our family#ok im feeling emo im going to post about the funerals again :/#must’ve been half asleep or shaking typing that good lord#ok so basically this was my grunkle’s (great uncle’s) family church located in the bush behind the bush of manitoba where a lot of ukrainian#ok so basically this was my grunkle's (grand uncle's) family church located in the bush behind the bush of manitoba where a lot of ukrainian#people settled this was one of the photos in his box that held photos of his life before leaving the farm and meeting my tía abuela and#and thus growing our family. when asked about the photos or the time in his life when they were taken he’d refused to talk about them#wishing to talk about anything but that time in his life information on such is basically unknown as his memory towards the end didn’t#include these memories nor did ever get around to sharing them he often said he wasn’t ready it was obviously the worst parts of his life#i’m so happy that he was able to leave that space and create our family im happy we got to live him and still love him that he made better#memories in our arms
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hey @real-life-cloud @thatsgaybro @lyricalvicki @tempestaurora @sweetietenya @greyladyblue @moumjn
we‘re either mutuals on my main (@pecuirlig), on here, or you follow this blog — and it looks like we all like krbk ! :‘)
first of all, feel free to decline <3
would anyone be interested in making a little krbk discord group or something? :‘)
as a casual fun hangout spot for people of similar ages (i think we‘re all 20+, most early 20s?), for talking about krbk (& maybe other ships/characters/shows etc too), sharing or talking about fics, or art, or whatever we want :‘)
i know i‘ve wanted to have a space like that for years tbh lol, since i haven‘t had the luck to meet anyone irl who‘s also into fandom or specifically krbk, back when tumblr group chats were a thing they weren’t very lively lol, and the krbk discord groups i‘ve checked out so far haven‘t had active members my own age.
i would be super happy if any of you might be interested too ! :‘) but i will continue to suffer alone lmao if you should not <3 (/lighthearted)
(btw— i‘m super open to other people joining this too, so please do feel invited if you are 20+ and you want something like this too ! i just only @'ed these people because there‘s been Some interaction between us already. not having @'ed you doesn‘t mean you‘re not welcome :‘) !)
#what i yearn for most often in my daily life is people to send drawings to#i‘ve started drawing and i get so happy when something works out imo & i send them to my friends and they‘re nice but they don‘t Get It lol#and although i don‘t know how brave i would be abt those; i‘ve had so many krbk thoughts over the years; like scenarios and aus and whatnot#i yearn to get happy abt them with other people; abt krbk#they bring me so much joy#i want to share it#i understand if you already have ppl for that or just don‘t want to for any other conceivable reasons; that‘d ofc fine#but i thought i‘d ask :‘)#((i would also rather have a group chat type of thing than post on here bc i get rly anxious about the content/audience type of thing; and#i don‘t think i could keep the good relationship i have with making stuff myself if i shared it on a platform. i want a little community;#and whenever i‘ve tried to create one here; it still felt rly distant and kind of lonely for me.#what i wish for is just a chatroom thing whatever where we can talk abt krbk lol; and it‘s comfortable so like hc differences and everythin#gets accepted and it‘s fine to share stuff however unfinished or unpolished or whatever it is and it‘s not about numbers at all#it‘s just a little group being happy about krbk hehe. if that sounds appealing to you; let‘s make one! :‘) ))
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Oh please continue drawing a the soft cute and fluster. Its too good and brings joy. You are so good at the soft expressions I know I cant get enough and I know a few others that cant either.
/)/////(\;; aaaaa thankyouuu 💙💙💙
i rlly want to draw the thoughts/scenarios i have in my head so i could have a solid visual of them so i don't have to stare off into the distance and-
-everytime, yk?
#ask#mblue talks#m rambles#easier to yearn with when there's a visual#gives me the big happy chemicals#when the head and heart both focus on the same goal and bring motivation to the hand#and create something that makes me and my heart happy...#then ive done one good thing for one person atleast :) for that time#when i share it to the blog and have ppl positively react to it- it makes me especially happy whenever ppl like you encourage it#makes me feel safe and valid how much self-inserts/self-shipping is accepted#thanks for feeding my delulu guys (/hj) i will not stop the simp braincells from bouncing off the walls like that one meme#🫶🫶🫶
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its june so i wanna share my lgbtq+ headcanons for ffvii characters just for fun, starting with the main playable cast:
(except they’re hcs by an obnoxiously trans gay person that projects onto their faves at all times, spoiler alert: they’re all trans and gay)
- cloud: he/him gay trans man - starting off strong with a gay trans guy (i warned that i would be projecting a lot with my hcs in this post) … but i’ve noticed a lot of other people hc/portray him as a trans man too so i know i’m not alone on this one! i cant explain exactly why i hc like this but i just do, probably cause i like him
- tifa: she/they transfem lesbian - i cannot be convinced that she doesn’t like women considering how she is with aerith and jessie tbh, and i like her so i’ve lovingly hit her with the transgender-inator beam out of love
- aerith: realistically- they/them nonbinary lesbian - i have no basis for this tbh except it just seems right to me! as for my actual hc for her (which is a pure projection, pls bear with me) - he/they gay transman - this is purely my own projection because aerith is really like stereotypically feminine(?) in ways that i am also feminine, so it comforts me to think of her like me if that makes sense
- barret: he/him but willing to test out she/her, unlabeled gender that is not quite cis but he’s only now exploring it and hasn’t quite figured it out yet, bi-curious and experimenting - thats so long but i’m not sure how else to describe it, i feel like he grew up all “traditional” and stuff, and then being a single adoptive dad and being a huge part of avalanche, he probably hasn’t had the time to really think about any of it too much or explore his gender/sexuality, but now he can with being surrounded with others that can help him explore, realize it’s alright to be uncishet, and help him learn about these things
- cid: okay i’m not gonna lie, canon wise he gives me major homophobe vibes (maybe its the raging misogyny that makes me think he’s bigoted in every other way…) but ignoring that he/she nonbinary bi - definitely exploring a lot and isn’t quite set in stone about what he is yet but he just knows he’s not cis or het and with those being more broad and spectrum like labels, he feels most comfortable with those over anything else, and he feels like they’re just right for him
- vincent: he/they transmasc gay - i’ll be honest this is also projection on my part because i love vincent a lot and want him to be like me! also he gives me major gender envy…
- reeve (in place of cait sith): he/him transman and gay - again, i just love him a lot tbh, and i feel like he is the kind of guy that knew who he was from a young age and tried to help out other people that are trying to navigate their queer journeys and find out who they are, i feel like reeve would be a major inspiration and advocate for the queer youth
- yuffie: they/them demigirl lesbian and arospec - she’s definitely still figuring herself out but she has very little interest in pursuing romance, but any relationship she can imagine wanting in her future is with another girl
#this post is genuinely just for fun!!! i respect all hcs and i know mine aren’t perfect or canon or anything!#most of these are either projections of my own identity or things that just kinda come to my mind when i think of the characters#i know sometimes lgbtq+ hcs can be controversial and i don’t want to create any kind of drama or anything i promise!!!#i just wanted to share my personal thoughts and takes on them! i understand if others disagree and i dont mind one bit! everyones different#a lot of them just kind of come to me as a vague feeling if that makes sense? like its the first thing that pops into mind yknow?#pls dont take any of these too seriously!#happy pride month!#i’ll probably post other characters hcs soon! :)#ff7#ffvii#final fantasy 7#cloud strife#tifa lockhart#aerith gainsborough#barret wallace#cid highwind#vincent valentine#reeve tuesti#yuffie kisaragi#minus red cause i don’t wanna risk anyone thinking im likening anyone in the community to an animal#lgbtq+ headcanons
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"How much delulu do you have for your oc x canon ship?" Yes
DABI JUST NEEDS DOGGO LOVE I KNOW IT
Image ID
--- Image 1
3 different situations. chibi paper doodles. Shun (OC), Dabi (BNHA)
Shun bites Dabi's cheek and pulles it like a mochi with a "nom" sound. Dabi doesn't look like he minds
Dabi gives Shun head pats saying "good boy" and messing his hair while the dog looks heavily blushed, startled and frowning in confussion at the new pleasant feeling, with a "huff huff" sound. There's an arrow pointing him "error, he stopped working"
Dabi sees Shun with his bangs up and hair pins, then casually says "that looks good on you" to a Shun with a blank expression "?… !" that then appears in front of him other day with a similar look, crooked and embarrassed smile while wagging tail, waiting a compliment. There is an arrow pointing him "new usual look" and Dabi laughs "pff"
--- Image 2
whiteboard chibi doodles. Shun (OC), Dabi (BNHA)
They're holding hands, appearing to be falling while smiling at each other
Shun bites Dabi's cheek and pulles it like a mochi. Dabi doesn't look like he minds
--- Image 3 - 4
1/2 the reason short comic. chibi paper doodles. Todoroki family (Shoto, Dabi, Fuyumi), Hawks (BNHA), Shun (OC)
The brothers have drinks and are sitting side by side "So, why did you choose him?" asks Shoto at Dabi while the later is supporting his face on a hand with a calm and bit bored look "hmm…" Dabi looks at a 3 people group not too far from them. A close up of Hawks, Fuyumi and Shun in a cheery and drunk talk, with an arrow pointing the dog. Shun and Dabi look at each other and the dog wags his hand to him, smiling
2/2 the reason short comic. chibi paper doodles.
"PFFHAHAHA" Shun (OC) changes back his attention to the group and they all explode in laugher shortly after "well…" Dabi (BNHA) starts answering Shoto's (BNHA) question after softening his expression and having a small blush "He's stupid and makes me laugh" says with a smile "stupid?" asks Shoto, a bit concerned "pff… yeah, he also makes my day shinier, and my life brighter. I feel loved and secure" adds with a soft sigh, smiling
--- Pic 5 - 6
1/2 ice cream short comic. chibi paper doodles. Dabi (BNHA), Shun (OC)
Dabi calmly having an ice cream while a curious Shun comes at top speed to him "looks good, what's that? Can I…?" he starts with shiny eyes and wagging tail "sure" Dabi answers with a blank expression and smears the ice cream in the dog's face
2/2 ice cream short comic. chibi paper doodles. Dabi (BNHA), Shun (OC)
Shun licks his own face with a oversized exaggerated tongue with a "mlem" sound and happily exclaims "Delicious! thank you!! I love you!!!" to a Dabi that just smiles softly. On the back, a random mob thinks "wasn't he too rought?" looking with worry at the two, Shun having a wagging tail and hearts floating over him
#oc x canon#dabi#toya todoroki#Oc: shun#Original character#Oc#bnha oc#bnha#Doodle#doodle dump#sketchbook#Art dump#fanart#Original art#My art#described#Archive log#thank you Hori for the inspo I haven't created nor drawn that much (even doodles) since like 2013#also w my partner we're creating TWO boyfriends for Tomura bc we saved him after Toya to have a happier life in our AU (reborn as Tenko)#but haven't doodled more than chara designs for them but will share them when I do (?#I do like/love fanon ships with Toya but this was born in our AU and makes us very happy and as multishiper that doesn't stop me FDJFDSK
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Im impressed by how much you're art evolved to today, do you still think about your art in the past and how you evolved to today to obtain this level of quality and story telling ?
Thank you very much! :D It always means a lot when other people tell me my art has improved over time. I feel like I can definitely see it in little ways. It's just super nice and cool when other people see improvement too! Like wow it's not just me, I really have come a long way with my art.
But yeah, I do think a lot about the art I did in the past and how I got to where I am today. It's really fascinating to me how the skills that kind of come naturally now were all things I had to learn over time. Like to some extent, I can just "feel out" where facial features go now without thinking too much about it, whereas in the past, I know I had a lot more trouble with that. I feel like I tended to draw eyes too big and I had a really weird way of drawing noses. I don't know. I also had pretty bad same-face syndrome I think. But yeah.
When I'm sketching in my sketchbook, I like to flip through the whole thing and look at all the sketches I've done in the past couple years/months and look at the way they've evolved over time in a "big picture" way. It's cool. I think it's especially because although it's a little more than just a hobby now, a good deal of the improvement came solely from my passion and excitement to just bring ideas to life. I was never really "practicing just to practice", and although I did do little studies based on photos from time to time, most of it was just me noticing things and picking things up from the real world but also from art styles I really enjoyed. And wanting to create something that meant something, and just trying until I was happy with it. Like I definitely never had "natural talent" - that doesn't exist - but I've always had a passion to create, and I feel like the act of drawing as a way of expressing my ideas has always come kind of naturally to me, probably because I did it so much when I was younger. It's always been my "thing". It's just cool to see that passion I've always had turn into art that I'm really proud of today!
#ask#godofchaoss#sorry for getting kinda ramble-y I tend to do that. especially when talking about art and process stuff.#I love drawing sooooo much. did you guys know that? were you aware?#I don't know if all this reads as conceited at all. you don't have to read all that skdhfskd I just. I actually do think about it a lot.#I'm not trying to say I'm the best artist ever or even that I'm a good artist! I'm just like. happy with where I'm at.#because at the end of the day I'm not even doing it to be good or for other people to think my art's good.#I want to create stuff that feels important to me. I have ideas I want to make Real and drawing is my way of doing that.#and so it's like. I make things that are good To Me. and To Me my art is awesome!! it makes me so happy!!#and then sharing my art is just a bonus because it means a lot to me that the stuff I draw for myself can#mean something to other people too. :)#I don't know if that makes sense but. yeah. sjdfhksdf I could go on and on I'm sorry I have way too much to say sometimes.
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#sylvie speaks#(in the tags because this isn't a complete enough though to make a proper post out of)#(and i will probably delete it anyway)#i am having Thoughts about creating and sharing and credit#and what it means to be a creator on the internet#(as much as that term has become loaded now)#i have mostly accepted that i do not get to control what people do with my words once i post them in a public forum#i will ask and i will request and i will trust in the goodness of strangers#but there will always be some people acting in ignorance or malice#and really when it comes to things like gifsets and fics and such i am so so happy for people to use them#even if it's for a fandom/media/ship that i might personally dislike or find uncomfy or some such thing#because it inspired and someone found meaning in my words and that is. all i can ever really ask#and they tend to be well credited anyway#and even if they aren't i think most people recognize that the quotes probably came from someone else#i'm not even as upset about poems floating around wholesale uncredited#(i'd have a personal vendetta the size of the pacific ocean against pinterest if i did)#but when it becomes credited to someone else#or when someone else claims credit for it#that... that does upset me in ways i find hard to articulate#and takes me by surprise in its stark contrast to how little i care about the other kinds of usage#i think it's about ownership perhaps#it is one thing to let something go#it is another thing entire for someone else to take it for themselves#it is mine; or it was; and i don't mind sharing i really don't#you don't even have to say thank you or tell me you're using it or even say it's mine#(though i much much much prefer that you do)#but it feels deeply violating for someone else to slap their name on it#i am perhaps slightly more bitter about this than usual#bc i recently discovered another piece of blatant plagiarism#that isn't worth pursuing but it does make me sad
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