i can't explain this eloquently, but i'm thinking of my ancestors in light of palestine.
i'm native american. what happened to my ancestors runs in my blood. it lives in every move i make and lies down with me at night. it's been centuries and i still feel it, still look up at the trees and know that the nature i am so connected to is due in part to the bones buried beneath. my heart aches for the people i will never know anything about besides how they were buried by colonization and lack of mercy, lack of humanity. i miss their ghosts, and i cannot help but think of how inevitable it is that future palestinians will feel the same.
because that's the thing. palestine will persevere. there will be a revival of gaza. i believe this, much like my ancestors believed centuries ago. even so, there will be no going back to the way it was before- a before that existed in the 1940s, not recently. the generations born from those who have survived and the generations born from them (and so on) will have this in their blood forever. the same moon i look at will be the one these generations will look at, and the same grief for those we never got to meet will settle deep within. there's no escaping generational trauma. even when that apartheid state fades to nothingness, palestinians will be forced to persevere.
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i know i've posted abt this before also but i did not have screenshots to demonstrate just HOW gently passive aggressive ingo is to volo when they talk. i have no idea if they intended it this way but he sounds so "sadly my strict standard of conduct will not let me tell you to fuck off for asking weirdly personal questions just so you can share your theories but with the subtext toolkit available to me i am VERY much shooing you out of the way so i can get back to what i was actually trying to do."
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i can never take nickel and balloon's conflict fully seriously even if they make up and apologize to each other etc because the whole time im just imagining that comic of baseball and suitcase going back to hotel oj after season 2 and seeing that nickel and balloon are #besties now meanwhile suitcase had a psychotic break over their bullshit 😭😭
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if i die, i just want you all to know that being on here has been brilliant thus far. the communities here are so welcoming & the people are so friendly; i've made so many wonderful friends on here, and wouldn't have it any other way. this site & fandom culture have given me something to do in my free time & to be passionate about. it's let me meet amazing people from all over the world and feel liked. i hope this will be able to continue on for many many years, but if it can't, thank you for giving me all of the lovely moments & memories we've shared up until now :)
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rereading nimona has infected me with a sudden intense desire to write original fiction. i still have no ideas i'm just going hhh. my turn now?
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okay i'm trying this for the 4th time on my computer (tumblr PLEASE WORK WITH ME)
pretty girl and h going to a pumpkin patch bc she's such a fall girly and she gets all dressed up in a cute cozy outfit bc she wants h to take some photos of her for her instagram, and maybe she chooses his outfit so he kinda matches, and when they get there the first thing they do is get apple cider and there is so so so much of her asking random people to take a photo of the two of them, like by the sign and on the back of wagon and on the hay bails with her in his lap and maybe a few in the actual patch, and h has been trained in photo taking courtesy of her (: so she gets a few really good shots before they choose their pumpkins (from the boxes in the front because neither of them realized they had to bring their own tools to get the super fresh ones and she was pouty about it until he found her a cute little white pumpkin with a curly stem that is going to sit on her coffee table until it's too old to keep) and they find pumpkins for each other and it's just such a good day and she's so happy and kissy bc none of her previous relationships ever bothered to take her to one of these, and maybe a few days later is when they decide to carve them and h has newspaper spread all over the dining table and he's promising her that he'll make her the pumpkin seeds she's been asking about for a while, and it gets a little messy and he keeps smearing pumpkin over he face until she's whining bc it doesn't smell very good so he has to clean up her face a little but she's still just (: the whole time looking up at him while he wipes her nose with his hand gently grasping her chin, and both of their pumpkins turn out absolute shit but they just think it's funny and cute and she puts one of those little "who did better!!" polls on her ig story and they set them outside with a few other little pumpkins they got since she wanted to decorate his outdoor space bein that she doesn't have one and it's all so lovey and soft and sweet and cute and ): - 🍓
stop wait:((( (this is so sweet:((((( like him being annoying while carving pumpkins and getting the guts on her face but he cleans it up after:(((((((( and letting her decorate his porch:(((((((( having shitty pumpkins together:(((( im so :(((((((((
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sometimes i'm like “oh yeah i'm SUCH a catch. women DEFINITELY want me.” and then other times i remember that i have seventeen hundred problems, most of which are arguably my own fault, and am single for a reason (the reason being a woman didn’t want me that much lol)
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