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#but atm this is what comes through
cosmicdreamgrl · 2 months
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taehyung x on/black swan performances for @raplinenthusiasts [ cr: 0613data ]
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fourtyforever · 21 days
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Finally put the clippings from June and july GP magazines to good use 😎 once I get my grubby mitts on august and September I’ll make another one for the other wall with the drivers I couldn’t find clippings of
(closeups under the cut)
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oldhabitsdiescrming · 4 months
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i can't explain this eloquently, but i'm thinking of my ancestors in light of palestine.
i'm native american. what happened to my ancestors runs in my blood. it lives in every move i make and lies down with me at night. it's been centuries and i still feel it, still look up at the trees and know that the nature i am so connected to is due in part to the bones buried beneath. my heart aches for the people i will never know anything about besides how they were buried by colonization and lack of mercy, lack of humanity. i miss their ghosts, and i cannot help but think of how inevitable it is that future palestinians will feel the same.
because that's the thing. palestine will persevere. there will be a revival of gaza. i believe this, much like my ancestors believed centuries ago. even so, there will be no going back to the way it was before- a before that existed in the 1940s, not recently. the generations born from those who have survived and the generations born from them (and so on) will have this in their blood forever. the same moon i look at will be the one these generations will look at, and the same grief for those we never got to meet will settle deep within. there's no escaping generational trauma. even when that apartheid state fades to nothingness, palestinians will be forced to persevere.
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i know i've posted abt this before also but i did not have screenshots to demonstrate just HOW gently passive aggressive ingo is to volo when they talk. i have no idea if they intended it this way but he sounds so "sadly my strict standard of conduct will not let me tell you to fuck off for asking weirdly personal questions just so you can share your theories but with the subtext toolkit available to me i am VERY much shooing you out of the way so i can get back to what i was actually trying to do."
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purpurussy · 1 month
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#tw suicide#idk i feel like i am probably gonna kms after TIT#i would do it sooner but i asked one of my friends to come with me and it would suck if i made him go alone#and it is something to look forward to which is helping me hang on i guess#but ughhhh once uni starts again in september i know everything is gonna fall apart.#i already got an extension on my thesis due to being a useless shell of a person who can't motivate themselves to do anything atm#but i was supposed to get some work done over the summer and have so far done nothing#hence why i want to kms before i have to talk to my fucking supervisors again and admit yet again that i simply cannot do this 😭#and it's not just this. my executive dysfunction has been so bad over the past couple of years and it's only getting worse#to the point where i can't imagine being able to work at all. and if i can't work i can't get out of my parents house#and then what the fuck is the point.#every time i see someone on here talking about bonding with their parents over dnp I'm like damn what's it like#to have parents who actually want to talk to you DSFGJJKL i know they let me live in their house at my big age#but that's only bc id literally be homeless otherwise and they're not like evil. they just don't love me#also went through a deeply embarrassing breakup recently#tl;dr ive been in love with this person for over a decade and i thought they were the dan to my phil or vice versa.#then after 10 years they left me and i'll spare the details but it has me wondering if they ever loved me#i thought it was a “let's live together and get a cat one day” relationship#but now i feel like for them. it was just a “sex and video games” type situation#i am trying soooo hard to at least be creative bc that makes me happy sometimes but it's hard to not be overly critical of myself#and now im getting to a point where i can barely even find any joy in this space any more. for a bunch of reasons#most of which revolve around me being extremely sensitive. and this is like my last bastion of dopamine so that fucking sucks#idk i don't see the point in my life any more. a social worker actually told me recently that i should consider euthanasia so.#it's just completely over for me i fear#this is not even mentioning all the damn migraines. and all the other ways in which my body simply doesn't work properly#sorry for this weird ass vent I'm not in therapy any more bc i couldn't find a therapist willing to treat me+all my diagnoses at this point#and im scared my friends will stop wanting to talk to me if i talk to them about this. several of them already have#the 2 friends i have left anyway. that's a whole other thing. when they said it's hard for autistic ppl to make friends i took that persona#so uh at this point it's vent here or develop a substance abuse problem. and im already halfway to having a substance abuse problem#anyway dan and phil for the love of god please fucking post something tonight. unfortunately you are my only hope
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theartinmyheart · 2 months
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🩵🩵🩵
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br1ghtestlight · 11 months
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i can never take nickel and balloon's conflict fully seriously even if they make up and apologize to each other etc because the whole time im just imagining that comic of baseball and suitcase going back to hotel oj after season 2 and seeing that nickel and balloon are #besties now meanwhile suitcase had a psychotic break over their bullshit 😭😭
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lilacthebooklover · 6 months
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if i die, i just want you all to know that being on here has been brilliant thus far. the communities here are so welcoming & the people are so friendly; i've made so many wonderful friends on here, and wouldn't have it any other way. this site & fandom culture have given me something to do in my free time & to be passionate about. it's let me meet amazing people from all over the world and feel liked. i hope this will be able to continue on for many many years, but if it can't, thank you for giving me all of the lovely moments & memories we've shared up until now :)
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loumauve · 5 days
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the goddamn toast water post just made me utter "history is fucking real" in the most solemn and serious tone of voice, out loud, to myself, in the goddamn bathtub
#life is ridiculous and I'm its biggest clown#in my defense it's not even 9 am and I woke up at 6 for some reason (the reason prob being that I start work at 6 atm)#so I chose (violence) reading Stray Gods fic in bed for a few hours followed by the need to just vibe in the bathtub#I've only just had my coffee and a slice of cold pizza leftover from yesterday and it's such a uni-days thing to do#I've kinda missed it. tho I wasn't drinking coffee back then (how the fuck did I survive mornings without it??)#anyway. feeling very soft and tender abt my past self today. I miss her even if she was just as much of a mess. in different ways#the kind of mess who would openly flirt with some strange dude she didn't really know over the phone#the kind of mess who moved across the country just for a chance at trying with sb she liked who really never wanted to date her#the kind of mess who's always fallen for her best friends and who'll likely never stop#the kind of mess who feel so damn hard for a woman 15 yrs older than her just bc she was kind and sweet and a mess herself#the kind of mess who moved in with a friend she was solidly in love with for a bit who had her boyfriend over most nights#just.. it's not all about those feelings but they're decidedly a big part of why I've ever done anything#and I will prob always miss the friend who'd lie on the train platform with me just giggling into the night as ppl walked past#her head on my stomach and me just feeling so high it felt like I'd never stop floating (just for a while though)#I guess what I'm trying to get at here is that Mi miss just letting my feelings take me places even at the risk of losing it all#I'm so much more hesitant and guarded now. and sure part of it is being medicated for my bipolar. it's good that I don't call strangers#and almost invited them over. or that I no longer walk barefoot through the city at night by myself (usually)#but I do miss just idk. intimacy I guess. and how easily it used to come to me to just try and be open abt wanting it I guess#oh well. best be getting out of the bathtub. it's not a good place to be with these thoughts. and it's too early for this anyway#a day in the life of..
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fissions-chips · 8 months
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why do teeth have to be so annoying. why. why are you hurting for no reason we JUST did this two months ago.
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tyrannuspitch · 2 months
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rereading nimona has infected me with a sudden intense desire to write original fiction. i still have no ideas i'm just going hhh. my turn now?
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waloeders · 4 months
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dating sim comin on slowly but surely. ik there are easier ways (rpgmaker is the only one that comes to mind) but i am enjoying coding in c# surprisingly? i dont hate the language as much as i thought i would
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moonchildstyles · 2 years
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okay i'm trying this for the 4th time on my computer (tumblr PLEASE WORK WITH ME)
pretty girl and h going to a pumpkin patch bc she's such a fall girly and she gets all dressed up in a cute cozy outfit bc she wants h to take some photos of her for her instagram, and maybe she chooses his outfit so he kinda matches, and when they get there the first thing they do is get apple cider and there is so so so much of her asking random people to take a photo of the two of them, like by the sign and on the back of wagon and on the hay bails with her in his lap and maybe a few in the actual patch, and h has been trained in photo taking courtesy of her (: so she gets a few really good shots before they choose their pumpkins (from the boxes in the front because neither of them realized they had to bring their own tools to get the super fresh ones and she was pouty about it until he found her a cute little white pumpkin with a curly stem that is going to sit on her coffee table until it's too old to keep) and they find pumpkins for each other and it's just such a good day and she's so happy and kissy bc none of her previous relationships ever bothered to take her to one of these, and maybe a few days later is when they decide to carve them and h has newspaper spread all over the dining table and he's promising her that he'll make her the pumpkin seeds she's been asking about for a while, and it gets a little messy and he keeps smearing pumpkin over he face until she's whining bc it doesn't smell very good so he has to clean up her face a little but she's still just (: the whole time looking up at him while he wipes her nose with his hand gently grasping her chin, and both of their pumpkins turn out absolute shit but they just think it's funny and cute and she puts one of those little "who did better!!" polls on her ig story and they set them outside with a few other little pumpkins they got since she wanted to decorate his outdoor space bein that she doesn't have one and it's all so lovey and soft and sweet and cute and ): - 🍓
stop wait:((( (this is so sweet:((((( like him being annoying while carving pumpkins and getting the guts on her face but he cleans it up after:(((((((( and letting her decorate his porch:(((((((( having shitty pumpkins together:(((( im so :(((((((((
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spark-circuit · 2 years
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LET’S GOOOOOOOOOOOO
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*V1 voice* [LITERALLY SEETHING]
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connanro · 10 months
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sometimes i'm like “oh yeah i'm SUCH a catch. women DEFINITELY want me.” and then other times i remember that i have seventeen hundred problems, most of which are arguably my own fault, and am single for a reason (the reason being a woman didn’t want me that much lol)
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rowenabean · 1 year
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spent several years learning how to be vulnerable and now it's become Too automatic and i need to relearn how to not tell people i barely know about my life problems
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