#but at least he can impress the guy with his cool guns

[thevalicemultiverse]

Londerland Bloodlines meets Fallout of Darkness

Londerland Bloodlines Alice: [to her counterpart] So -- you didn't meet your Victor until after the world bloody ended?

Fallout of Darkness Alice: [nodding] And we'd both been in stasis for 210 years after that -- me thanks to an accidental staking in my hiding spot, him because Vault-Tec was fucking evil and froze him.

LB Alice: Bloody bizarre...but I'm sorry you didn't get to meet Victoria or Emily. They're very nice people.

FoD Alice: I'm sure they are, and it's a shame they both died in that awful vault. But I'm glad I've got Victor at least. [pause] Even if he insists on carrying around ten million pounds of junk with him wherever he goes.

FoD Victor: [calling over from where he's showing his LB counterpart how to shoot his Tactical Tesla Rifle] It's only 740 at the moment!

[vonlycaonwife]

would you be willing to do headcanons for how the guys (billy, wise, lycaon, ben) would treat the reader on a first date?

You mentioned the guys so I added Anton to the list! Can’t leave out the bro! Enjoy!

Warnings: guns mentioned (Billy)

I feel a first date with him is more casual, though Belle would’ve insisted on something more romantic. She would probably suggest at least a coffee date or dinner, while Wise more so planned a movie night.

Either way he sticks with his plan, since you had already agreed. Though he did make a compromise with his sister in letting her help pick the movies. Which ended up with a list of both documentaries and cheesy romance films.

It gets really awkward if any of the romance movies have more…intimate scenes. The both of you trying to skip over the scene and not make things even more awkward.

But other than that, it's a really fun date! He's really informative over the topics in the documentaries you watch, giving extra info and whatnot.

You two would end up falling asleep cuddling on his couch in his room, giving Belle the perfect opportunity to take a photo. She definitely plans to use it later to embarrass you both.

There’s several places I can think of a first date spot Billy would pick.

One of them being an arcade, mainly so he would be able to both beat you at the games. But also so he could look cool by winning the prizes for you, though the success rate of that is very hit or miss. Just never try to challenge him to a shooter game, you’re in for a world of ego pain.

Another place I can see is actually a shooting range, though that’s only if you’re cool with guns. It’s definitely another way for him to try and look cool by getting perfect scores (because of course it would turn into a game). But another bonus would be him showing you how to shoot a gun right with minimal recoil.

But one more place I feel he would take you is just a simple coffee date, though I can see this being more so suggested by the girls of Cunning Hares than something he thinks up of himself. It wouldn’t be a bad date! Though it may be a bit awkward when he can’t really eat or drink due to his face mask.

All in all no matter the setting you are gonna have tons of fun with this silly boy.

Ben gives me such casual vibes that I can’t really imagine anything but a simple coffee date as a first date.

He would be very sweet the whole time though, asks you about any allergies you may have just in case, pays for the both of you without even thinking about it, even leading the conversation if you’re shy or unsure.

The two of you would just be having a nice talk the whole time, unaware of how long it’s been since the start. Though after realizing the two of you still continue the dae by just walking around and taking in the sites of the city and the people walking by.

The only reason the date would end would be because either he got a call about a work emergency, for which he apologizes profusely over and promises to make up for it, or when you two finally notice how late it’s gotten. He definitely walks you back home, no questions asked.

It just would be so nice and calming, definitely evident of how being with him would be in my mind.

Now I don’t have a good read on Anton, but hear me out. Gym date.

I can see him thinking about this on the spot to be honest, though he’s not mad if it isn’t up your alley.

Other than that I can see him mainly just doing a simple dinner date, nothing too fancy but not it being just a random bar y'know? He would pay without asking because I can see him thinking of that being what the “man” is supposed to do. But he wouldn’t be pushy if you asked to split.

I feel like most of the energy we see would not be there since he would definitely be nervous about making a good impression. But once he relaxes it’s all back and a great conversation partner!

He would also walk you back home, and when he’s returned to his own place I can imagine him screaming while fistbumping the air in celebration of a good first date.

Oh boy, if you ever want a fancy first date this man already has the reservations set.

He’s showing up in a nice outfit, not the one he wears for work, with a sweet bouquet of your favorite flowers. And would lead you to the car he’s using for the night.

Now I don’t believe he would do like the fanciest restaurant, though he most likely could afford it, but it would definitely be high end enough for you to be dressed up enough. Plus he would have picked a place that was suited to your tastes and had your favorite dishes and desserts.

He just would be so sweet and romantic, but it would also be very obvious that he’s nervous about making a good impression. It’s easy to tell by how he’s making sure you’re having a good time. And once you confirm that you are, you might be able to see his tail wagging behind his chair a bit.

After having your fill, he would drive you back and drop you off at your door. If you let him he would leave a small kiss on your forehead before leaving. His tail subtly moving in happiness behind him.

[inbarfink]

Ace Attorney Lawyers Ranked By Their Abilities in Physical Combat

Winston Payne: I’m pretty sure the average Tumblr user could kill Winston Payne with their bare hands.

Sebastian DeBeste: Look, the only reason why this wimp ranks higher than Payne is because he is so sopping wet pathetic that there is a significant chance that his opponent will just start feeling bad about kicking his ass and punch themself in the face instead.

Klavier Gavin: While Klavier is a physically fit young man who is known to keep his cool in extreme situations, he is also a giant law-abiding nerd who has never thrown a punch at anything that isn’t an inanimate wall. It probably wouldn’t be that hard to shove this guy into a locker.

Miles Edgeworth: Look, Miles is an even bigger locker-worthy nerd than Klavier. Anytime anyone, friend or foe, suggests a violent solution he just gets freaked out and begs for them to follow procedures. And no AA Lawyer is more easily thrown off his rhythm and startled than he is. He might have some bulk under the magenta and frills (or at least some impressive leg muscles from climbing 12 flights of stairs every day for like seven years), but he has no idea or will to actually use them in a fight. However, he did try and stare down a man who was aiming a gun at his back that one time and managed to keep his cool throughout all of this.

So like, he’d probably talk a big game and try and intimidate his opponent into not engaging - but if that won’t work he will get his ass thoroughly whooped. And then he’d try to sue them, which is what his threats were about all along.

Apollo Justice: Actually a considerable step up in power-levels from the previous ones. Apollo might be smol, but he is Done With Your Shit and this gives him Strength. Not to mention that one time he successfully tanked an explosion. His famous Chords of Steel can also serve as a tactic to confuse or weaken his enemies.

Kristoph Gavin: Although he is primarily known for his schemes and poisoning, he did kill a man with a single blow to the forehead with a bottle, showing he does have some decent upper-body-strength to use in a fight. And being known as ‘the Coolest Defense in the West’ means he can keep his calm even during hectic combat. But he’s also very pretentious and his constant pontifications might just be the perfect opportunity for someone to smash his face in.

Blaise Debeste: Okay, look, is Blaise a scary tall man who successfully stabbed a woman to death with a candelabra and constantly carries around a deceptively-powerful lighter and has like, implied, motorcycle gang background? Yes. But also I think anyone who encounters Blaise Debeste face-to-face is overcome with such bloodlust rage that it might give them an edge in the battle against him.

Mia Fey: Mia ranks fairly high on the Battle Scale considering the one time she was faced with a violent altercation she just tried to escape and it… didn’t end well.

However, in the two times we get to play as her it’s also clear that she wants to Punch. All of the Things. While Apollo is fueled by being Done With Your Shit, Mia has righteous anger - so I think in a situation where she is actually prepared to do battle she would be able to throw a few decent punches. Also assuming we are talking about Mia while she was still alive, there’s also her Spirit Channeling powers to account for. While we’ve never seen them on screen, Maya told us they are “first rate” and I believe her. Maybe she could channel the spirit of a great warrior to try and get an edge in combat?

Manfred Von Karma: While he also has the same Bloodlust-Inducing-Factor as Blaise, and he does seem less physically fit even though they’re about the same age - I feel like his cane could do more serious damage than Blaise’s lighter. And he has that dangerous fucking Stun Gun on him to easily neutralize opponents. Plus, he did tank that one gunshot he got in the shoulder. Manfred’s opponents might have Rage on their side, but also you cannot underestimate the power of his sheer Spite.

Godot: On one hand, Godot has shown an ability to keep his cool in very dangerous situations. He can smash a coffee cup with his bare hands and barely react, showing that he’s decently strong and resilient to pain. And he is yet another proud (?) member of the exclusive “Lawyers With a Body Count Club”. And while stabbing a waifish, 155cm college student (and part time-poisoner) in the back isn’t exactly the most epic demonstration of battle prowess in the history of Anime Lawyers - he did it (and moved the body and doctored the crime scene and prosecuted in court) while tanking a knife slash in his face, showing his pain-resilience once again, as well as general tenacity that would also be useful in battle. Also, he can summon an infinite amount of hot coffee mugs at will, which must make for a decent improvised long-ranged attack.

On the other hand, his health is also heavily implied to be deteriorating and that he’s basically dying over the course of the final case… possibly due to all of that physical exhaustion. If a fight goes longer than just a single backstab, I feel like these health complications are gonna harm Godot’s performance.

Phoenix Wright: Okay, so this is actually the hardest one to place. I keep flip-flopping on where to put him, especially compared to Mia, and Apollo. Because unlike most other lawyers currently ranked below him, he is a disaster when it comes to being on the offensive; Phoenix Wright is a total wimp who has never returned a punch in his life. However, he is also almost supernaturally durable, unbelievably lucky and deceptively strong. If a solid iron door, a raging freezing river and a speeding car didn’t manage to take him down, what chance does a fellow human, even a more combat-capable one, have???

Calisto Yew: She’s not even a real-lawyer! She’s a Secret Spy who successfully pretended to be a Lawyer for years! She’s got a gun, she’s got a knife, she's got crossbow bolt as hair decorations, she probably has some combat training from her time in Interpol… While she’s clearly more specialized for espionage and infiltration, and not as physically strong as Lang, she’s still got an impressive advantage over most of the regular people who went to Law School. In fact, her skill with barefaced lies and manipulation might also be a skill she could use in a fight to catch her opponent off-guard.

Nahyuta Sahdmadhi: Nahyuta is, in fact, one of the few AA Lawyers to canonically participate in what I would unambiguously call a ‘fight’ (rather than a ‘murder’), when he single-handedly disarmed and apprehended a Defiant Dragon rebel in the sorta-canon ‘Spirit of Justice’ Prologue video.

Like, that rebel guy probably isn't the world's greatest warrior, but the Defiant Dragons have been around for enough time to give their members at least some basic self-defense/combat skills… more so than the average lawyer on this list at minimum. And Nahyuta very easily crab-stomped him. Showing that he has strong nerves, some amazing reflexes and the martial art skills to knock a man unconscious with a single blow. Not to mention the seemingly supernatural skills with his prayer beads, which he already uses as a sort of ‘weapon’ in court. Also that... thing he did to Apollo's bracelet that one time.

Nahyuta might be just straight-up Magic, that's pretty OP.

Franziska von Karma: Look, Franziska might not have official martial-arts, guns, or Literal Magic Powers - but what she does have is sheer determination and force or personality. Franziska von Karma has been intimidating grown men since she was a 149 cm tall 13 years old with a riding crop (I mean, one of those men was Miles, but still…..). She had once whipped Phoenix Wright into unconsciousness in a temper tantrum, and like I already mentioned that taking him down is quite a feat. She is also very resilient - while the shot to her shoulders was designed not to kill her, being up back on her feet doing investigation stuff a day after is still very impressive! Her whip might not be as dangerous as a sword or a gun, but she will not relent until she defeats you.

Simon Blackquill: Let me just give it to you straight, Simon Blackquill is 1.88 meter tall, he owns a katana and a trained attack-hawk (giving him both short range and far range advantage), he can break solid metal chains with his bare hands, he can cut your hair halfway across the room with a feather. Not to mention how he could probably use the whole psychological manipulation in battle to intimidate or goad his enemy. There’s not even a lot of funny or interesting points to bring up, he is literally an action movie character who just happens to also be a lawyer.

Athena Cykes: Athena Cykes is the strongest lawyer. One day, she’ll be stronger than whales. I believe in her.

[mokulule]

Dead on MAYn Day 1 - still untitled.

Prompts used: Dinner interrupted by a rogue/gang fight, courting rituals.

This thing keeps growing so I figured I should just post the first part. It will be continued eventually it’s kinda going places I didn’t expect. I am also using the flickering prompt, but it doesn’t appear in this first part.

Danny dug into his burger with gusto. It was not Nasty Burger, but it was greasy and cheesy and juicy and definitely hit the spot after a whole day walking about Gotham taking in the supernatural sights.

Sam was entirely less impressed with the vegetarian option and had set it down with a grimace and was now just picking at her fries. Tucker had taken it as a personal win for the Meat Team™ and was lording it over her with his eyebrows - thankfully he was too busy eating to actually say anything, which Danny was very glad of. You could only hear the same arguments so many times. At least age and maturity had assured they didn’t end their friendship over it.

“So,” Sam said, “What’s next after this?”

Danny finished chewing his mouthful, before speaking. “I’m not sure, I figured just go back to the hotel for a bit, chill until nightfall? Gotham’s court won’t be in session until then.”

“Seconded. My feet hurt,” Tucker chimed in.

“Maybe if you didn’t spend all your day sitting in front of a screen all day-”

And they were at it again… Danny tuned them out with the practice of years of being on the sideline, humming in agreement when prompted. He loved his friends dearly, but arguing was a part of their love language that he didn’t feel like participating in.

He let his eyes wander around the small diner, and found himself frowning as a group of men hurried inside.

If Danny had been less used to his ghost sense warning him of trouble, maybe he would have reacted in time - or at all. As it was he found himself frozen in shock when he saw the guns - regular human guns, not ecto-guns, ecto-guns he knew how to react to.

It was strange to realize that nobody had ever pointed a normal gun at him before and someone was pointing a gun at him right now - of course it would be in Gotham he got that experience.

“Hey you, stand up slowly and get over here. Hands where I can see them.”

Oh.

Danny’s brain suddenly caught up to the events.

A group of five armed men had entered the diner waving guns. Three kept their eyes on the door and windows as if they expected someone to follow them. One was moving behind the counter towards the back, maybe looking for the waitress who had skedaddled as soon as the armed men entered and the last one had his gun trained on Danny, who of all people in the diner he’d figured was the best option for a hostage.

Danny resisted the urge to laugh.

Slowly he did as bidden, raising his hands and standing up.

On the surface he wasn’t an unreasonable choice. He was short and lean, if he was completely honest he looked like a stiff wind could blow him over. Sam in contrast looked like trouble and Tucker had grown up annoyingly tall, and if Gotham police was like most places it was probably wiser to pick a white boy as hostage anyways. The rest of the people in the diner were two heavy set construction workers and a lady with arms broader than Danny’s thighs, like damn. 

So yeah, Danny was apparently the best choice. 

Regretfully, he left his dinner to cool on its plate as he took carefully measured steps towards the… what? Mobster? Gang person? 

A part of him was wondering how much a gunshot could hurt him. Would it hurt him? In human form probably, as long as he was tangible. Would it kill him the rest of the way? He wasn’t particularly keen to find out.

His eyes flickered to the other armed men when one of them hissed at the guy at the door. “Do you see him?”

Danny considered doing something for about three steps, but he wasn’t experienced enough with real guns and fighting humans that he thought he could risk it. He’d also prefer to fly under the radar while he was here. He was on vacation, not here to mess with anyone.

There was a familiar feeling in his throat, wanting to be let go. His head snapped towards the kitchen. What! That couldn’t be right?

The man grabbed him and put the gun to his head just as a crash sounded from the kitchen and the wisp of cold breath escaped his mouth. Everyone turned towards the noise. The man who held him tightened his hold and pushed the gun so hard against his head he had to tilt it. 

Something black came flying out the door and the jumpy gunmen shot at it, but with their attention on the object (a pan, it was just a pan) they didn’t notice the man who followed behind. He was fast, not much more than a red brown blur, shooting the furthest man in the arm so he dropped the gun and then coming in close, punching the first man and kicked the next in the belly. He moved so smoothly, effortlessly. 

Danny forgot to breathe. Because that there was the source of his ghost sense. Because that there was also a human.

Another halfa.

Here in Gotham of all places! 

His heart gave a hard thump in his chest and he gasped, remembered breathing was a thing he sorta needed as a human. He still couldn’t take his eyes off the other halfa. Now there was someone who knew how to fight. His core hummed pleasurably in his chest. The other halfa had taken care of those goons in less than ten seconds. The fourth one was probably dealt with in the kitchen. And the fifth-

Danny was abruptly reminded of how the fifth had a gun to his head, as he annoyingly poked him with that barrel and pulled him backwards towards the door.

“Not another step or he gets it!”

Danny grimaced. He finds another halfa and he’s a fucking hostage? Stellar first impression, right there! Someone please shoot him- or wait, considering the situation that was probably not the wisest turn of phrase. 

“How about you let the civilian go, and I won’t break your kneecaps.” The voice was menacing though clearly modulated and there was a delightful, almost cheerful undertone.

Now that he was standing still, Danny could better appreciate him. He was a big man, probably near a head taller than Danny and so much wider. Death had clearly not stopped him from putting on muscle. Normally Danny might have been jealous, but honestly he was too busy appreciating the other halfa. 

He was wearing a red helmet, faceless except for a pair of glaring eyes and he had a large bat symbol across his chest. This last bit should put Danny off. There were very good reasons Danny didn’t want to catch any attention here. He couldn’t think of them right now. But there were… reasons… yes… and thighs walking towards him-

“I swear I will shoot!”

Oh for fuck’s sake! There were too many people involved. Danny promptly stepped down on his captor’s instep, ducked and twisted out of his hold. 

Red Hood, because that was his name, Danny suddenly remembered, promptly shot the gun out of the man’s hold and took him down with a punch and a crunching kick to the right knee. 

Shit, Danny was jealous, not of the broken kneecap of course, but he also wanted to throw down. He could show the other halfa what he could do, make friends, or more? Would it be too forward to gift him one of his moon rocks?

It probably was too forward? This was the first halfa he met who wasn’t a fruit loop or related to him. At least he hoped he wasn’t a fruit loop.

“Are you alright?”

Danny shook himself out of his thoughts to find that he’d been approached.

Now that he was up close Danny could really appreciate how those arms looked strong enough to bend him in half and- Danny’s gaze stopped at his waist. Was he actually wearing a leather corset? It did great things for his-

“That was either brave or stupid.”

The words had Danny’s eyes snapping back up to the glaring helmet. Danny was frozen. How was he supposed to talk to him? His mind reeled. Do something! Anything!

“How’s this for stupid?” Danny blurted and promptly punched him in the gut with a good deal of ghostly strength. Red Hood bent over with a pained oof.

Fuck! Danny’s brain screamed at him in despair. He could not believe he’d done that! Glancing around he couldn’t find Sam or Tucker so he quickly ran out the diner. 

He was grabbing for his phone in his pocket while running, when he was pulled into an alley. He was so wound up he nearly threw another punch, but then he realized it was just Sam and Tucker.

He breathed a sigh of relief.

“Danny!” They spoke in eerie unison. Tucker snorted, but Sam continued, “Are you okay? You look like you’ve seen a ghost!”

Danny shook his head, realizing he must look a little dazed. He felt a little dazed. He didn’t even feel like taking the obvious bait.

“I punched Red Hood,” he admitted.

“What!” There they went again I unison, almost as if they practiced it.

“Do you think he’d like a moon rock?”

The looks they sent him then, they were indescribable. Absently he padded his shoulder to make sure he hadn’t grown a second head.

“Are you sick, Danny? Was there something in the food?” Sam put her hand on his forehead checking his temperature, even as she looked at Tucker, “What are the chances there’d be blood blossoms in a random burger?”

“Extremely unlikely, more likely something new, never seen Danny react like this.”

Danny grumpily pushed Sam’s hand away. “The food was fine. I’m fine.”

They gave him twin dubious looks.

“Look, let’s just go back to the hotel room. I just need a little rest and I’ll be fine.”

-

Jason gasped in pain to the sound of laughter in his comms. What the Hell was in that guy’s food that he could throw such a punch?

“What did he did the little guy do, Hood? Kick you in the jewels?” Dick managed to ask through laughter.

They didn’t have visuals, small mercies, but Oracle the traitor had let on to the former hostage’s scrappy stature in the run down of the situation.

“He did not.” Jason growled and turned off the comms, done listening to those idiots. Shit, fuck. Definitely a meta, that had been super strength. Keeping one hand over his pained abdomen he walked over to kick the goon who had decided to crawl for his gun in Red Hood’s apparent distraction.

“Don’t even think about it, I am not in the mood for it,” he growled and the goon whimpered.

When he finished securing the goons, of course the meta was long gone. Jason sighed in annoyance. Just his luck.

[redhoodinternaldialectical]

Thoughts on Jason Todd’s choice of weaponry?

:D an ask! Yay!

Oooh, lets see, I'll start with the crowbars because I appear to be like one of three people on the entire planet who actually likes them.

They're a tacky as fuck riff on the fact that Jason's death is central to his character. They overemphasize the manner in which he died, muddy the waters about what part of his death is important to him, and strangely cheapens the manner in which he died through the parody feel of it.

No one seems to really disagree with my analysis here, but I happen to enjoy that about them and think it's very on brand for Jason. What can I say? They're fun!

Best Quality - His Wiggles

This ultra-sharp curved blade used to be his signature character design feature, the way the white streak in his hair is now, and I'm really not sure why it didn't stick!

Best weapon he's ever had, bring it back please!!!!!

The All-Blades

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm....

HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM...

I have mixed feelings about the All-Blades. Like much of Lobdell's work: phenomenal idea, poor execution. Giving the guy who is most known for being morally grey a set of powers that is exclusively based on moral absolutes sucks shit, I gotta be honest, and the trick he pulled on the blood blade was cool but ultimately does nothing to solve those problems.

HOWEVER

I want to love them so fucking badly. A set of glowy soul blades is a dope sicknasty off the chain concept and I wish the well wasn't poisoned with the moral implications and the restrictions to use them only on the "Untitled", a set of enemies that only exist for Jason so far as I can tell. If someone seriously took Jason down a magic based path that removed the DnD alignment chart bullshit, I would be so game to see them come back! Hell I wouldn't even insist on a better cooler design for them!

...though uh, yeah those are the least interesting magic sword designs I've ever seen tbh

Normal Ass Swords

They're alright I guess. Like, there's nothing in it really, but it's not bad?

Guns - Real Bullets

Excellent, evocative yet simple, straightforwards and to the point. It makes hella sense thematically to boot, love this for him, please give him back his pistols and miniguns and shit

Guns - Rubber Bullets

Hate. HATE. hate ick disgusting bad NO.

I just fucking hate rubber bullets, like, as a concept. I refuse to accept "non-lethal" bullets as a valid use of gun, either in real life or in fiction. Guns are for putting many holes in things very fast!!!! If you're gonna use a gun, fucking well own up to that!!! Do not play this silly ass game of pretending that you can change out the material and do the same things as with lead bullets but with the video game status effect of "non-lethal" applied. YOU ARE GIVING PEOPLE SMALL CIRCULAR BRUISES. This is still harmful, yes, ooph ouchie, but it is not even slightly a good use of a gun, you are wasting holster space, and carry weight, and the physical materials used to make it all!!

JUST USE A FUCKING STICK! YOU DON'T RUN OUT OF STICK AMMO!

My belief in his capacity to take out enemies is shattered the instant those fuckers are on panel. Maybe this ain't entirely rational, or realistic to how fights go with rubber bullets IRL, but I hate them so much on principle that I will ignore any counterargument you might have that they'd work. I will die on this hill. Rubber bullets BAD. Please stop making him use this!!

Bombs

Love it, give him more bombs forever

ka-BOOM!!!!

His Brain

This is actually his best weapon - sorry wiggly knife, you're being shunted down to number 2 on a last minute technicality! I think Jason is at his best when he's outsmarting people and making long term fucked up schemes to ruin people's lives.

He's so good at it! It's so fun to watch him do it!

Genuinely a shame that this facet of him was mostly lost after Flashpoint, though to give credit where it is due, in Rebirth Jason did ruin the Penguin's life in an impressively elaborate way, which I did really enjoy. I want to see him be a tactical deliberate menace to one person in specific again idk, that's part of why I do kinda agree that he works better as an antagonist than a protagonist - which it should be noted does not mean I think he works better as a villain necessarily, his ethics aren't what matter here - he's just had his best moments as the schemer, and it's hard to have a protagonist schemer even when you make them ethically the good guy.

I hope you enjoyed my nattering on about Jason's weapons :D thank ye again for ask!

[jevilowo]

TEAM ASCENDED FORTRESS 2

An AU by me in which the mercs ascend to their ultimate forms

Oh God tumblr wrecked the quality-

More about the AU under the cut!

WOKE SCOUT: she started taking estrogen and instead of fixing her it made her worse. She gets into fights on twitter about neopronouns and has successfully cancelled everyone she doesn't like at least once. However, as cancel culture isn't real, this only lasted about three seconds for each. She managed to pull Ms Pauling also which is pretty cool.

SOLDIERSUNE MIKU: the ghost of Shakespearicles told him to dress as Miku and redo the salem witch trials. Only knowing one witch (Merasmus), he finished this quickly and now roams the country with Zhanna (who is now Zhannagane Miku after Mikus metal counterpart) spreading malice and wonder through the power of AMERICAN SONG COVERS. He uses a wig for the Miku effect, but is working on growing his hair out also.

MITOSIS: Pyro and Engie were shagging one time and they came so hard they did mitosis. Now theres 23 babey Pyros (count em) and Engineer is a single dad. There's a lot of Pyro Mitosis Lore™ in my head, but the basics are that they evolve into either humanoid, beastial, demonic or celestial Pyros eventually.

TAVISH, KING OF THE LOCH NESS: he did it he blew up that bloody sea monster and now he is king of Loch Ness. The self loathing has died down a lot which is great for him but his body is still a scrumpty distillery which is eh. Still, he has funky water powers and his partners Soldiersune and Zhannagane come to visit often.

KEEPER OF TIME AND SPACE GUY: Heavy was mad, he knew he'd been had so he shot at the sun with a gun. Instead of being a show off like that bitch Juno, he had a nice philosophical conversation and chess match with Time and impressed Time so much he was appointed as the guardian of Time and Time's partner, Space. His guns (the six angel thingies pictured) can turn into celestial weapons which helps in the protecting but people don't shoot at the sun so often so its a relaxing enough gig really.

GODDAMMIT ENGIE: after realising how much more efficient Gunslinger was than a lame ass human hand, Engie succumbed to his hubris and eventually replaced all his body parts with robot parts. Including his dick which led to the Mitosis Incident. Anyway. His chest is a dispenser which makes projects pretty convenient and he has a mini-sentry attached to each arm and leg, making him a walking weapon. This did not help with the god complex, but it helps with the single father thing.

THE INFERNAL DOCTOR: Medic kept attaching more souls to his own and selling them to Satan for power. Satan got so sick of this eventually he attempted to beat the shit out of Medic. By now Medic was slightly more powerful than Satan so this ended with Medic absorbing Satan's powers and basically taking his place. Somehow, his relationship with the guy who is now a celestial being was unaffected by this. If they really tried they could probably ascend even further. To godhood, perhaps. In any case, Medic becoming The Devil from The Bible did nothing for the god complex.

???: Sniper just kind of fucked off into the woods one day god knows what happened to him but Scout's convinced she saw him for like three seconds a week ago and "YOU GUYS HE HAD ANTLERS I SWEAR-"

RETIRED AND BECAME A FUNCTIONING MEMBER OF SOCIETY SPY: yeah. He's very happy with Scout's Mother (Maureen), and he's letting his roots grow out (his spy agency made him dye his hair black). He's even making an effort to be a good parent to Scout, bought her the trans flag ipad cover and everything, but she just keeps trying to cancel him. Maureen's sure they'll work it out between themselves eventually, but until then she has to keep finding more secure hiding places for the ipad (the best so far was the time she buried it under a tree a mile away, took Scout at least four hours to find and retrieve it that time)

There's also YURI MS PAULING, in which she pulled a whole polycule of beautiful women, but I'll cover her in another post.

Also TERFS DNI please. Woke Scout is just Scout being Scout (which is to say a bit stupid), and assuming all trans women are like that would be ridiculous. So fuck off.

[blasphemecel]

Michael Kaiser — On Your Knees

PAIRING: Michael Kaiser/Reader WORD COUNT: 2.9k TYPE: Humor, Teasing, ERM I think y/n and kaiser might like each other 🤓 WARNING: Suggestive sorry (flirting is only verbal but explicit at times)

Kaiser always looks alright with his hair wet. Not, like, stunning or anything, but passable. Then you know it’ll start standing up in weird ways after it dries a little and he’ll ask Ness to help him with it — which, embarrassing, by the way.

But anyway. You wanted to check out the communal bath after you took a shower, figured you’d be alone because it was already bordering on late, and Kaiser followed you because why wouldn’t he. Not like you value your peace and solitude or anything. He can be such a pest sometimes.

You were telling him what Isagi told you — it’s called a sento and apparently it’s different from the more popular onsen — and he said you weren’t ‘worldly’ and that you weren’t ‘impressing him’ and then some more about how ‘everyone knows this.’ Shithead. You should spit in his breakfast tomorrow, if you remember.

Well, you like sitting in the bath, at least, so you’re not too sour right now. Even Kaiser being right next to you can’t ruin it.

“I like this Raichi guy,” you say.

Kaiser shakes his head a little to show you he disapproves. “Don’t tell me you mingle with them. Also, the guy’s always benched. He’s second-rate.”

“No, listen, he was telling me about this sexy soccer motto he has. I really wanna know what it’s about.”

“You’re embarrassing. If you’re in my entourage, you should act like it.”

“Dude, you’re just mad at Isagi ‘cause he was trending on football twitter more than you were that day,” you say.

“I’m not!”

Very persuasive argument coming from him here. It’ll take a lot out of you to take it apart. He’s fuming about it, too. Maybe it’s not so bad Kaiser came along if you can poke fun at him.

“I don’t know why you’re the favorite on the team, anyway,” you say. “They all die over your corny tattoo and not to mention how much you love showing it off. Not cool at all.”

“You wish you were me. Now you’re being jealous because no one likes you, and it’s making you look even uglier than usual,” says Kaiser, seeming to believe himself if the smug look on his face is anything to go by.

“I mean, I had a girlfriend till recently, you know.” Kaiser rolls his eyes, but you ignore him. He’s always doing this, pretending he doesn’t want to hear you. “She had this botched blue dye job and said things like ‘pussy power,’ with the crystals in her room and the tarot cards and all.”

“Yeah? Sounds great. Did you pick her up after a match, loser?”

You click your tongue and wag your finger at him just to be annoying. “No, I don’t fool around with fans. Seems more like your forte.”

He flicks the offending finger away. “I’ve never done that, you slanderous pig.”

“No, but listen, she didn’t care about football at all. She didn’t even know what a scissor kick is. Ooh, she drove me wild.” You sing the last part, looking up at the ceiling fondly as if you’re recalling a warm memory.

Kaiser narrows his eyes at you, frowning. “You’re one strange individual.” And what a pompous way to put it.

“But anyway, wanna know what kinda tattoo I’d get?”

“I seriously don’t care.”

“A skull with two guns. Hard as fuck.”

“You’re so lame. It’s appalling, and also probably why you got dumped.”

He’s taking the tattoo thing seriously. At least seriously enough to insult you over it. He’s even snickering at you in amusement. His face is always, how can you put it… snide, but he does look a touch more evil when he starts grinning and shit. What a hoot, though. Really.

“Nah, there was this guy. He wore suspenders with plaid polos and these little sweaters over them. They were sustainable. Sustainable. Can you believe it? Sustainable! I didn’t stand a chance.” You poke him on the neck, already distracted from what you were rambling about. Kaiser is going to bring up your low attention span soon, you can smell it on him. It doesn’t take any effort to reach out, though, what with him sitting so close next to you. “This isn’t such a bad spot for a tattoo, actually. I don’t know, maybe you were onto something.”

“Paws off,” he says, swatting you away like a bug. A pedestrian bug, probably, at least in his imagination. “You really wanna fondle me that badly, you’ll use any excuse to do so?”

“Paws!” you repeat, clapping. “You’re hysterical.”

Kaiser rolls his eyes again. He seems to like to do that a lot, at least in your presence. If there was such a thing as competitive eye-rolling, you wager he’d be good at it, maybe even better than he is at football.

“No, but listen-”

“God, I hate it when you say that,” he interrupts with a groan, then contradicts himself by also swinging an arm around your shoulder, pulling you closer just to yawn in your face with great exaggeration. The water is way too hot for this nonsense, so you push him away. “Because I never want to listen to you.”

“You’re crazy. Insane. It’s super clinical. Like, really.”

“Yes, I’m sure, unlike me, you’d pass a psychiatric evaluation because I’m crazy and you aren’t. Of course.”

“Imagine-”

“Can you stop topic-hopping?” Kaiser asks, annoyed. See, you knew he’d bring it up. “Does your head ever hurt with how much bullshit goes through it?”

You shush him. He scowls at you like you’re some mold growing in the bath, but you disregard his expression of disdain. “Imagine you’re having a nice day, I don’t know, at practice. Then I barge in with all of my asshole glory, right, and I walk up to you, and for no reason, I say, ‘On your knees,’ instead of greeting you. Isn’t that kinda deranged?”

Kaiser stares at you. To his credit, he’s decent at maintaining a poker face, but once he’s embarrassed, there’s no hiding it, no going back. Because no matter how much he does his usual male posturing or whatever it’s called, his face is all red, the blush even going up to his ears, mouth wavering the slightest bit. “W-What? In your dreams.”

“Oh, do you like getting bossed around or something?” you ask with the sensitivity of a numb toe. “That’s so pathetic.”

It’s quite the spectacle when his skin somehow becomes even more flush. Sick of your leering, maybe, Kaiser whips around, albeit not all the way, and covers his cheek with his hand while peering at you through his fingers. Finally, he decrees, “You suck,” with too much authority.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever. Forget about me, though. In that situation, do you spit or do you swallow?”

It’s unclear whether you’re getting any gratification out of this besides the satisfaction of flustering him, but you smile in amusement regardless. As if you care about Kaiser sitting there, looking all pretty and nervous because of some nonsense you’d been spewing. Not like you’re crazy about him or anything. That’d be ridiculous. You couldn’t be more unfazed if you tried.

You grab your towel with what you’d call impressive swiftness, then turn around and stand, covering yourself before preparing to go on your merry way. Kaiser pulls you back by the ankle, trying to trip you or something, the menace. Hilarious guy, really.

He is staring up at you in this petulant sort of way, grabbing onto his own towel with his other hand. “Why are you leaving so soon?” he asks, sounding peeved, as if you haven’t been here with him for an unreasonable amount of time already.

“I thought I should give you some privacy since you’re all hot and bothered now,” you say (with this douchebag laugh you have for situations like these, where you’re being a douchebag — self-explanatory), stepping out of his grip. Then you try to imitate his voice, but more high-pitched, accompanying your performance with a few vulgar hand gestures. “Oh, [Y/n], you slanderous pig! I think that’s what you’d sound like.”

“You’re such a lowlife,” he says, before all but leaping out of the bath and trying to maim you right here on the spot, and the only thing to save you from your demise is that he gets lightheaded and almost faints immediately after.

You reach out to pull him up and keep him steady, holding him by the arms. “You can’t be jumping out of the bath like that, man, come on.”

The lack of response concerns you, but after a while, Kaiser gathers his wits enough to say, “I’m going to make you slip, and I’ll be praying you split your head open.”

You burst out laughing. “Do it, then. You don’t have it in you, do you?”

Instead of doing as he promised to retaliate to your provocation, he settles for letting go of you and glaring, before clutching the side of his head and going still again. If there was any medical wing in this goddamn football contraption, maybe you would’ve taken him, but alas. At least you don’t need to worry about Kaiser too much since he eventually concedes and holds onto your arm for support.

The sight of you two stumbling around towards the changing room is probably comedic — uncoordinated as hell, covering yourselves with these flimsy little towels, using the hands not clutching at the other.

“You’re supposed to drink a lot of water before getting in,” you say.

“It’s your fault! You didn’t warn me we were going.”

“Yeah, ‘cause you weren’t invited. Jeez.”

“Oh, whatever.”

You return the tiny towel to the basket, swapping it for a bigger one and making quick work of drying yourself. You’re slipping on your shirt when you ask, “Is your head all right now?”

“I’m fine.”

When you turn around to judge whether he’s being truthful or not, he’s dabbing himself in a manner which is way more laborious, examining his reflection in the mirror as if he’s in some slow motion commercial where the camera will capture a conspicuous water droplet falling down his neck, admiring his jaw from different angles. He makes you sick sometimes.

“I’m not gonna wait for you to finish checking yourself out.”

He shoos you away with a dismissive wave of his hand. Unlike his, your actions most often align with your words, though, so you do walk out of the door. You’re not even ten steps in when Kaiser reappears, now magically dressed.

“Stop rushing,” he says, pushing you out of the way — and for no reason! There’s enough space for both of you in the hallway. You end up lagging a bit behind him. “I’m dizzy.”

“I thought you said-”

“Blah, blah,” he cuts you off, untying his hair and doing a bad job of smoothing it out with his fingers.

You’re rooming with him and Ness, so you’re already headed in the same direction. As much as this stinks, your other option was Gesner and Grim. God, is fucking Gesner obsessed with dick cheese. Of all things, that’s what he’s always talking about. Grim has your condolences, but the problem is out of your hands now.

“Your hairstyle’s ridiculous.”

Kaiser turns his nose up and smiles, coming off as pleased by the insult. “You can only wish to pull it off.” Always preening like a peacock. He’s entertaining. You swear he is.

You hook one of the ends, where it’s the bluest, around your finger, twirling it around and around. “I had a dream about you recently.”

“Aww, I’m on your mind even when you’re unconscious. I could vomit right now.”

“You were in the meditation position, but you were levitating, and the rat tails were holding you up.”

Maybe you’ve committed some kind of utmost offense, because he doesn’t even bother insisting they’re not rat tails this time. “Wow, those are the kinds of things you dream about me? Your brain is defective to the core.”

“What do you want me to dream about you, then? Are you implying something?”

He faces you, and he has this way of looking at you like you’re a blight on humanity. You have an urge to press your palms against his cheeks to check how warm they get when he blushes, but resist it. “You’re so delusional.”

He’s rolling his eyes again.

“Keep rolling them, see where it gets you.”

“What, are you implying something?” Kaiser asks, mocking you, but he seems kind of happy at the insinuation. You’re not about to point it out, though, having a semblance of self-preservation.

“But anyway, your hair,” you say. “It looks good for tugging on.”

He snorts, either at your audacity to speak such things out loud to him, or at the way you straight up ignored his question.

So you elaborate, just so he doesn’t get the wrong idea, “Yeah, like, I kinda wanna grab you and swing you around till you fly outta my grip.”

“What?! As if.”

“It’d be so funny, though.”

“Maybe to other stupid people like you. Dense people who always ruin the fucking moment, for example, that type of thing.”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” you say, stifling a laugh before entering the room.

The lights are still on when you come in. Ness seems to be reading some kind of book, sitting upright and all. “Hey, guys. You were gone for a while.”

“We were,” Kaiser says, you assume just because he likes hearing himself talk. “All that time I can’t get back.”

You crouch down to get him a water bottle in case he forgot how dehydrated he was (or more likely decides he’s above getting it by himself). It’s rare for you to do something out of the goodness of your heart, so when you turn around to pass it and find him draping himself over the solitary bed — the one you won dibs on in an honest round of rock, paper, scissors — you swear to never do anything nice for him ever again.

“Hey, get off! It’s mine.”

“But I want it,” he whines, as if his word holds more weight than the aforementioned game of rock, paper, scissors, which, as already established, you won.

You’re about to make an earnest attempt at throwing him out of the bed until Ness comes to his defense. “Come on, leave him alone.”

Saying no to Kaiser is exceptionally easy. But going against what Ness is asking? You can’t get a read on the guy. He’s either way too happy most of the time, or is secretly plotting your murders for all you know. You toss the water bottle at Kaiser, leaving him to smirk at your relenting.

“By the way, do you mind if I turn the lights off after I do my nighttime routine in the bathroom? I’m kind of tired,” Ness says.

“Sure,” allows Kaiser. So generous and charming with a winning personality to boot, this guy.

You lean against the bunk bed and ask, “Oh yeah, why are you still up?”

“I thought it might be rude if I went to bed before you both came back, so I decided to wait.”

Damn, now you feel kind of bad for dilly-dallying for so long. You clutch your chest with a tasteful sense of drama. “You’re so perfect. Hey, Ness, you wanna take the top bunk?”

“Wow, really?”

“Why not at this point,” you say. After all, Ness came in second in the game, but gave it up to Kaiser, and he ruined everything already.

“Thanks!” He grins at you before rushing off to do his business, almost blinding you with the sweetness he emits. Your gaze trails after him until he leaves the room.

Kaiser is looking at you with a mix between scorn and disgust when you walk over to his side to retrieve your phone from the bedside table, but you pretend not to notice.

Figuring you have nothing better to do, you take Ness’s previous spot, lying down on your stomach, ready to check your notifications. In your peripheral vision, you see Kaiser take his shirt off theatrically, then he has the fucking nerve to throw it at you. He makes such a big show out of existing.

It’s probably more painless to throw him a glance now than to be stubborn, so you exhale out of your nostril in resignation and turn your attention back to him. Kaiser props himself on his elbow while reclining on his side, posing on the bed, gracing you with a bastard smile. Almost presenting himself like a Renaissance painting you’re supposed to admire in some chaste, intellectual kind of way.

“Wanna know something?”

“What?” he asks, apparently irritated since you don’t seem so appreciative of him right now.

“I think shitty, obnoxious guys like you need to be put in their place,” you tell him.

It really is way too obvious on his complexion when he starts getting shy. He’s like a breathing mood ring. It’s almost fascinating. For a second, Kaiser is incredulous, but then he turns smug again, addressing you with a sense of challenge. “Don’t even joke. You’re not really about it like that. All you do is talk.”

You think you’re gonna start having even more fun together after today.

___

No homo I HATE HIM 😍

[musings-of-a-rose]

Falling Slowly - Chapter 11

Pairing: Tommy Miller x f!reader

Word Count: 5000+

Rating: Mature - 18+ ONLY!

Warnings: Just like ao3, “creator chooses not to use warnings.” If you click Keep Reading, that means you agree that you’re the age to handle mature themes. Also by clicking Keep Reading, you understand warnings may not be complete in order to avoid spoilers for the story. 

Notes: What started as a simple “wanting to make Tommy an actual daddy” turned into a whole ass fic. Is anyone really surprised? I absolutely adore Tommy and Daisy and would love to revisit them! 

**If you want to be added to the taglist, join here or let me know!

❤If you enjoy the fic, please consider giving me a warm beverage! (It is not required in any way!)

**Divider made by @benkeibear 

**Reader is not described

Main Masterlist

Falling Slowly Masterlist

Tommy Miller Masterlist

The truck runs out of gas just inside of Teton County. We gather up our packs, keeping our guns loose in our hands but ready, as we march through the woods. Tommy had found a paper map of Wyoming, noticing that there was a small notation of a hydroelectric dam on it. He's convinced that this settlement will be near there and I admit, that's a great place to start looking.

We don't make it within 20 miles of that plant before horses and riders come from nowhere, immediately surrounding us, their faces masked. Tommy puts his arms out to shield us, knowing that there was no way he could shoot them all.

"What are you doing out here?" A man bellows at us, his horse snuffing, a swirl of air puffing out from his nose in the cool, fall breeze.

"We heard there may be a settlement around here. We're looking for a place to call home."

"You know anything about dams?" A woman speaks up from behind the first man.

"I uh, I was in construction. I know some things. I can take a look."

She stares at him from behind her mask, weighing our usefulness. "And them?"

"My wife can grow anything. And has some medical knowledge. My son..helps her."

Several long moments pass. I can't get a read on them. If they are from this settlement, I can't really blame them for being so selective. And secretive.

"You come here on foot?"

"For the last 50 or so miles. We had a truck. Still works, but no gas."

She nods. "Stash it?"

Tommy nods. "Just in case we needed it again."

"Smart man. Alright, you guys come back to town with us."

They offered us horses, which Jax hopped on immediately, his whole face lighting up with excitement. It had been years since he was able to ride. I'm still on the fence about trusting them. After a while, we see their gates in the distance, a little shotty and in need of, well, Tommy's expertise. But that's not what holds my attention.

"Is your town named Jackson?" Jax asks the woman.

She nods. "It is."

Jax laughs, a sound I hadn't heard in a very long time. "That's my name! Must be a sign, right mom?"

The gates open and I'm rendered speechless. It's a town. A whole ass town. People are milling about like everything is normal. The woman, Maria, starts to give us a tour, pointing out the town hall, the bar, clothing swap and repair, and little general stores. She takes us around and shows us the barns, slots for at least 40 horses, the herd of sheep, and the dairy cows and goats. Jax practically comes unglued from the Earth when seeing everything. Maria smiles at his excitement.

"You're 17, right?" Jax nods. "Well I think you should still attend school. At least to just get to know the other kids. But your official duty, in my opinion, should be with the animals. What do you think?"

"Yeah! Dad, is that ok?" Jax clings to Tommy's arm and he smiles patting his hand.

"Yeah, of course, bud."

Jax whoops and punches the sky, immediately apologizing to the chickens that had started frantically clucking and running around their enclosure.

But what really impressed me was our house, an actual house. Maria stopped in front of this beautiful 3 bedroom, two story house, complete with a front porch. It was like stepping into a time machine. They had cleaned all of the houses and kept them maintained, but the decor was exactly the same as it was on outbreak day 14 years ago.

Jax picked a room once belonging to a teenage boy, judging from the decor. We quickly unpacked our things and headed into town, getting a hot, fresh meal and trying not to overstuff ourselves. They gave us a small ration of food to take home, a carton of eggs, some flour, salt, yeast, honey, a carton of milk, and, much to Tommy's delight, a small container of coffee.

I was afraid that all of the time spent just growing up around us, and then on the constant move with the Fireflies would make it difficult for Jax to make friends.

I couldn't be more wrong.

Immediately, the kids from town were fascinated by Jax, asking him tons of questions about the outside, about him. He eventually takes off with them, going to movie night at the community center.

Tommy and I walk back home, his arm around my shoulder, tucking me into his side. "That kid made fast friends."

"I was so worried about that. Guess I didn't need to be."

"Nah. He's a good kid and they can see that."

We stop for a moment outside of our house, looking up at it. "This was a good move, Mr. Miller. I like it here."

I turn to look at him and he smiles, pressing his lips to mine briefly before we head inside, the early fall chill on the wind making us shiver slightly. Tommy starts to unpack the food while I take a quick shower, groaning as the hot water sends goosebumps across my skin. I hadn't had a proper hot shower since we'd left the cabin.

I lay on the bed wrapped only in my towel, finally allowing myself to relax for the first time in...years. I can't remember how many at this point. Tommy comes in and wolfwhistles at me and I try, and fail, to hide my smirk.

"Looks like they left a present for me on the bed," Tommy chuckles, attempting to sit next to me. I put my foot out to stop him.

"Nuh uh. Take a shower first, stinky."

He looks fake hurt, putting a hand to his chest. "How dare you, I smell delightful."

"Yeah to a group of flies."

He pretends to storm off in mock anger, shedding his clothes as he goes. He stays a bit longer in the shower than I thought he would, but I can't blame him. That hot water is too much of a lure. He comes out, towel wrapped around his waist, his hair wet and curling. His incision is healed by now, a small red line all that's left of the metal that nearly took his life. Tommy lays next to me on the bed and I curl into his side.

"Hey, darlin? I know you're all clean and sexy and naked next to me, and I so want to have my way with you. But do you think it could wait until morning?"

"Oh thank God - I'm so exhausted."

We both chuckle and burrow into the blankets, talking for a bit when we hear Jax come in, closing the door to the bathroom and taking a shower.

I haven't felt this safe in years.

An electrified warmth, pulsing out from between my legs yanks me from sleep and I moan, my hands moving down and finding Tommy's head between my legs, his face pressed into me. My fingers grip his dark curls and I tug, loving the sound he makes when I do.

"Fucking hell, Tommy. Warn a girl."

He chuckles and my hips jolt. "Alright, well I'm warning you now, my beautiful wife. I'm not done with you yet."

Tommy makes good on his promise, sliding into me with practiced ease, my body taking him in greedily, responding to every touch, every kiss and nip. He digs his fingers into my hip, slowly moving me in time with his hips, angling himself to go deeper, hitting that spot that has me gasping his name, my fingernails digging into his broad back. His hips sputter, his head drops to my shoulder as be bites it, filling me with his warmth. He picks up his head, his nose lightly dragging across my face before kissing me.

"I fuckin' love you, Mrs. Miller."

"I fucking love you, Mr. Miller."

Life in Jackson is good. We're all kept busy but a natural busy, not a frantic "is this the moment when we all die" busy. Jax settles in beautifully, finishing their school and learning more about animals and their care as he works with them. About a year in, he finally asks out the girl he had been crushing on since we got here, Lara and, a year later, they're already talking about marriage. Young love.

Tommy helps to fortify the walls, manging to tinker with the dam and get it fully operational. He admits he had virtually no idea what he was doing. He just banged his wrench around and it eventually turned on. He joins patrols too, but mostly stays inside the gates, making repairs and fortifications.

I help a little old lady named Lu with the garden. I had brought some medicinal herbs with us and we were able to propagate some more from the clippings, which works out great for the clinic.

New people do show up, but it's rare. Jackson is fairly secluded, and Maria pretty much forbids anyone from giving away our location. I can't blame her. If everyone knew about this place, it would be overrun in a heartbeat, our supplies spent. Not to mention the clickers that would likely follow a crowd that large.

But today is one of those days. Maria radioed in that 3 new people were coming into Jackson, and to ready the clinic. The doctor there called me in to help, as I often did when she needed it. She told me what to prep and I realized whomever is coming, one of them must be pregnant.

"Imagine trapsing this lanscape, pregnant," The doctor said, no trace of malice to her voice. A little pity and awe though.

The clinic door opens and the doctor greets the people. I turn around and drop the tray I'm holding.

Sarah. Sarah is standing in the clinic.

A man stands next to her and on her other side-

Rose.

Rose and Sarah are alive and here.

"Sarah?" I choke out and her head snaps up, her round belly on prominent display.

"Aunt Daisy?"

"Holy fuck!" Rose gasps and I run to them, pulling them both into as tight of an embrace as I can manage, tears streaming down my face. I feel theirs as well. But when a small kick hits my stomach, I back up, apologizing to Sarah.

"Ah I'm sorry! I forgot! Come, the doctor will take a look." Sarah grips my hand, lacing our fingers together.

"Come with me?"

"Of course."

Sarah turns out fine, about 7 months along. She could do with a warm meal, some water, and a good shower. Sarah introduced me to her boyfriend, or husband, the second they can find someone who will marry them. He's a sweet boy by the name of Eli. We head over to the cafe and I point out all the places to Sarah and Rose and Eli. Once they get seated with food, I head outside, a smile on my face as I run to the stables. Tommy will be there with Jax, as he's repairing a broken stable door. I run, full on run to the stables, sliding inside the barn and coming to a stop in front of them, gasping for air.

"Mom! Mom, is everything ok?" Jax drops his hammer and puts his hand on my shoulder.

"Yeah...yes..." I take a few more deep breaths of air. "Sarah..and Rose...are here."

Once they get settled in a house, conveniently across the street from ours, we bring them over for some hot tea. Sarah sips on hers, a little moan coming from her as it warms her up.

"So...how did..where is..."

Rose and Sarah exchange a look and I don't like it. Sarah nods at Rose and takes another sip of her drink.

"We stayed another year or so after you left. They seemed to buy the story at first, that you had all gone out on some family thing and just...never came back. It happens. But Joel suspected that they were getting suspicious. So he said we needed a way out, to find the Fireflies so we could find you. They demanded Joel go on a long run with them, taking them somewhere up above Maryland."

"Maryland??"

Rose nods. "Yeah, that's what I said. Anwyay, Joel said he'd go but we had to go with and that we were off limits. Well... nothing happened but some guys were being creeps and that finally tipped Joel over the edge. He killed the guy in his sleep and we left on foot. We were heading towards Boston. There's a qz up there. We figured we could find out where you were from there. We had to cross this bridge. But they caught up with us and the bridge couldn't hold everything. Not with all the old cars on it and it not being upkept for years. The bridge went down and..." Tears poured from Rose's eyes, silent ones pouring down Sarah's cheeks as well.

"Joel?" Tommy asks, barely a whisper.

Eli speaks up. "I wasn't there, but they told me." He puts his hand on Sarah's giving it a little squeeze. "The bridge collpased. Took out the raiders and they nearly died too. But they looked for Joel for days. Couldn't find him. I'm so sorry."

I started to cry, but it was less about the loss of Joel, whom I loved like a brother, and more for Tommy, who looked like he had lost a limb. He got up and walked out the backdoor, slamming it behind him. I followed him, gently pulling him to me as he crumbled against my chest, gripping my shirt as he wailed over the loss of his big brother.

We eventually learned that Rose and Sarah ended up in a different qz than Boston, which is where Sarah met Eli. He was FEDRA but hated them, supporting the citizens in any way he could, even if that meant turning a blind eye to some insider trading. He and Sarah fell in love, but shortly after, the qz got violent, the people rising up against FEDRA. They managed to escape, Sarah finding out she was pregnant a few weeks later.

Eli had some Firefly connections, so they headed to their posts, eventually figuring out that we had left the Fireflies and relocated "somewhere in Teton County, Wyoming." And so they came here, hoping to find us. And being completely surprised to find Jackson City.

Sarah gives birth to a beautiful baby girl, Juniper, with her eyes, Joel's eyes. As Juniper grows, her hair becomes this beautiful carbon copy of her mother's, her curls bouncing away. Eli is a fantastic father and husband, always by his family's side.

Jax and Lara move in together and get married, Lara getting pregnant a short while after.

"I don't know if I'm ready to be a grandma," I say to Tommy while I look in the mirror. "Although I do have the greys."

"You'll be the hottest grandma I know." Tommy waggles his eyebrows as he pulls me to him, his tongue pressing against mine.

"If I'm a grandma, that means you'll be a grandpa."

Tommy looks shocked. "Holy shit. You're right. You still gonna wanna kiss this old man?"

My fingers wind in his shirt, pulling him down to me as I speak against his lips. "That's not all I'll do for this old man."

"Tree! Tree, mommy!" Juniper jumps up and down, yanking on Sarah's coat as she pushes back from our table, shoving the last bite of egg in her mouth.

"Yes baby. We're going to see the Christmas tree. You guys coming?"

Juniper looks up at Tommy with her big eyes. "Great Uncle Tommy coming?"

"Sorry, kiddo. Not today. I gotta fix the barn roof before the big snows come in." Juniper sticks out her lip. "But I'll see you tonight for hot chocolate?"

She thinks, her little finger tapping her lips. "Ok!" She yanks on Sarah's coat again, half jerking her towards the front door.

"See you tonight, Aunt Daisy?"

"Yup. I'll have cookies too."

"Yay!" Juniper yells from the doorway. Sarah and her leave, the house considerably quieter when they do.

"Crazy to think that in a few months, there will be another little one running around here."

"Yeah. I can't wait."

"Me neither."

Tommy kisses me before heading off to the barns, finishing up the last of the roof work. The last snow storm took off some of the panels and so it needs to be repaired before the next big storm or we may lose a horse or 2.

Tommy walks back in 10 minutes later. "Forgot my work gloves."

"How did you forget those, Mr. Construction?"

"I got distracted looking at your ass."

"How dare you, good sir. I am a lady."

Tommy walks up to me, pressing his body to mine. "A lady that I had bent over this table last night."

I slap his chest playfully before kissing him again. "Oh wait. I'll walk with you. I got to pick up a couple things for the cookies."

Tommy walks me a few blocks, intending on turning left to head to the barn while I continued on to the main strip. But then we hear yelling, just making out Sarah's name. Tommy and I glance at each other, immediately anticipating the worst as we run towards the wailing sound. We come out of a side ally onto the main strip, half a block away from the Christmas tree. And there, at the bottom of the tree is Sarah, crying her eyes out, her body desperately holding onto someone. No, wait.

"Joel?" Tommy says next to me in disbelief. But then their bodies shift, and there he is. Joel, with his mop of now grey hair, grasping onto the daughter he undoubtedly thought he'd lost.

Tommy runs as fast as he can over to them, Sarah pulling him down into their embrace. Juniper, who had been standing there holding her mom's other hand, immediately jumps on Tommy and hugs him, her little fists digging into his arms. I walk up, wiping tears from my eyes and, to my surprise, Joel looks up at me and pulls me down to him, hugging me as tight as he can.

"I thought you were all dead," He says it so quietly in my ear, but I can hear the wobble in his voice.

"We're here. We're all..." I turn my head, looking into the small crowd of people. "Someone get Rose. Now!"

Joel snaps back from me, his eyes boring into mine. "Rose is here?"

I smile at him. "Yeah she fucking is!"

Suddenly his eyes look over my shoulder and I see the shift in them, know he sees Rose, and I know that feeling. The one of loss and relief, the pain that causes in your heart. Joel tries to stand but it's too late - Rose is there, dropping into his lap as she clings to him, tears streaming down her cheeks. He pulls back, cupping her face, his eyes roaming over hers.

"You're real?"

Rose nods. "Are you?"

He pulls her to him, their lips meeting and I look away, giving them a moment of privacy, marveling at the fact that our family is somehow together, at the other end of the country, even all these years later.

As it turns out, Joel was not traveling alone. Ellie is spunky, full of attitude, keeping Joel on his toes. I love her already.

Tommy told me later about exactly why Joel and Ellie were here, what secret Ellie was carrying. That he has to bring her to the Fireflies so they can try and make a cure, an actual cure.

"And you think they can do that? They have the resources?"

Tommy shrugs, pulling his shirt over his head and exposing his bronzed skin, freckles spattered about, along with several scars. He starts to rummage through his dresser drawer, looking for a shirt to sleep in.

"Joel seems to think so."

"Hhhmm. I bet Rose will have something to say about it."

"She probably will."

I walk up to him, lightly brushing my fingers across his back. My arms slide around him as I press kisses into his back. He hums, his arms folding over mine. The warmth radiates out from his body and seeps into mine, relaxing me but also heating me up for very different reasons. I slowly move my hand down, dipping under the waistband of his sweatpants.

"And here I thought you said you were a lady." Tommy sucks in a breath after that last word, my fingers encircling him, slowly pumping him as he hardens in my grip.

"I want you to do un-ladylike things to me."

"Yes, ma'am."

He pulls my hand from his pants with a groan, from which of us I'm not sure. I turn to walk towards the bed and yelp, Tommy's hand lightly slapping my ass. He chuckles as I look fake shocked. I turn to him, my hand on my chest.

"How dare you sir! Ah!" He somehow reaches around me, slapping me on the other cheek, the shit eating grin on his face lighting up the room. He presses his lips to mine, but I'm not making it that easy. I pull back, turning to walk or run away, I'm not sure. But I know I'm not fast enough, Tommy's arms pulling me to him, caging me against his broad chest. One arm wraps around my chest, the other sliding into my panties. He moans as his fingers sink into me.

"Fuck, is this for me?"

"It's always for you, Tommy."

He continues to touch me, using his other hand to turn my head up, swallowing my moans with his kiss. The air electrifies and the mood shifts, both of us suddenly very desperate for the other. He pulls his hand from me and pushes me onto the bed, helping me to yank my panties down. They never make it off, just shoved down somewhere around my knees as he hikes my shirt over my hips. I'm already angling my body, my chest against the bed, Tommy's fingers digging into my hips as he gets into position. He pushes forward and I can't help the gutteral whine that erupts from somewhere within me, louder and more primal as his hips rut against me.

"My wife, the lady, begging me to fuck her."

I'm seeing colors now, my fingers twisting into the sheets to get some sort of purchase so I can push my hips back, driving him deeper.

"T-Tommy," It comes out more like a plea, a whimper of his name. But he knows me well, knows my body sometimes better than I do.

"I got you, darlin'."

He pulls me up, holding me against his chest again, one arm wrapped around me and one hand between my legs, touching me where it makes my legs shake.

"Come for me, baby," his voice rasps in my ear, low and sultry. And I do, I come hard, pulsing around him, his name chanting from my lips as I watch the colors dance around my vision. His hand stalls for a moment before pushing me back down, laying his body over mine as he continues to fuck into me a few more times before he comes, groaning and biting my back. He takes several breaths before pulling out, cleaning us both up before plopping back down on the bed. I scoot in next to him a minute later and he pulls me to his side, lifting my jaw with his finger to gently kiss me.

"You definitely know how to treat a lady."

Joel and Ellie leave the next morning, much to our dislike. Tommy knew they were leaving, of course he did. I guess it makes sense. Less people out in winter time, less chance of a confrontation. Still, it made me uneasy and I wish they'd stay at least until spring.

What surprised me most was that Rose stayed behind. She was not happy by the looks of it, but she still showed her love to Joel, Ellie clearing her throat and looking anywhere but them.

"Listen, Ellie. I know we don't really know each other, but I want you to know, you'll always have a home here. Ok? No hesitation." I may have only met her yesterday, but I really liked this kid. She gave Joel the crap he needed and that won her all the points she needed in my book.

"Thanks. I'll probably just stay there in case they need more blood. But it's good to know." She gives me a quick, slightly awkward hug before nodding to Tommy and Sarah, who had just come walking up to the stables where we all stood.

"I can come with you, you know?" Sarah asked her dad when he pulled back from Rose.

"No, you can't. You have my granddaughter to take care of."

Sarah hugs him tight, and I swear I can see a tiny glint of a tear in Joel's eyes, his head slightly turned as he breathes her in, having thought he'd never be able to hold his daughter again.

"But I just got you back."

"I know, baby girl. I know. But this is important. You know I wouldn't go if it wasn't."

Sarah nods against his chest before pulling back, wiping tears from her eyes. She stands between Rose and me, watching Joel pull Ellie up into the saddle. Rose moves forward, brushing away some stray dirt on his pant leg and he leans down, kissing her once more.

"Remember what I told you, Joel."

"I will. I love you, baby."

"I love you too."

Winter progresses, Lara getting further along in her pregnancy leaving Jax looking utterly lost as to how to help her.

"Just get her whatever she asks for and make sure to rub her feet. Oh! And when her belly gets big, stand behind her and lift it up. Your mom loved that."

"I just hated it when you had to stop."

Jax's smile fades and he turns serious. "I'm just afraid this one won't stick, too."

I cup his face. "Oh baby, sometimes these things happen. It just wasn't meant to be. But I'm sure this one will be running around and calling me grandma in no time."

Thank God I was right. Lara has her baby just as the winter snows start to melt, a beautiful little girl they name Emma, after Lara's sister who died saving her on outbreak day. She immediately has Jax wrapped around her little finger.

Our house is loud again, baby sounds echoing off the wood boards. I couldn't be happier. Tommy feels the same, his face lighting up whenever he gets to see Emma.

"I always feel like we're imposing," Lara confesses as she rocks Emma to sleep.

"Never. You are never imposing. Even if you just need a moment for yourself, you bring her right over," I assure her.

"Thanks, Mrs. Mil-I mean, Daisy. Sorry, that's still weird to say."

The false spring ends, the final snows melting away as flowers and trees bloom. Tommy and I walk arm in arm down main street, intending on having a quick bite to eat at the restaurant before heading back to work. There's a small commotion at the main gate before it opens slightly. Tommy stops, pressing his hand above his eyes to shield them from the bright sun.

"Holy shit. It's Joel and Ellie."

We jog up to them, embracing them both. Something is different. Off, a little. I can tell something happened, but they're both back and safe and that's what we focus on. We head right into the clinic, Rose running and jumping into Joel's arms. He kisses her hard before setting her down, where she promptly breaks the kiss and punches his arm as hard as she can.

"Ow."

"Joel Miller, if you ever leave me again, I will find you and kill you myself. Do you understand me?"

A small smile tugs at the corners of his lips. "Yes, ma'am."

We take Ellie for a meal, allowing Joel and Rose some time to themselves. She's a little quieter than normal, shoving food around her plate for a bit before eating.

"Hey. Everything ok?" I ask, trying to put no pressure on the question.

She shrugs. "Yeah. I guess I'm just disappointed things didn't work out."

I hesitate for a moment before grabbing her hand and squeezing it. "You are fucking brave for even trying it. You're a bad ass."

She chuckles. "A bad ass?"

"Hell yeah!"

She shifts a little in her chair before resuming eating, a little more eager than before. I'm not sure what what on between here and Salt Lake, but I hope they can both come to terms with it. I'm sure they will.

Emma sits on her father's lap, happily chewing on some food we'd cut for her from the absolute feast we've put together. Everyone is here, Jax and Lara and Emma, Eli and Juniper and Sarah, who is rounder than ever with their second child. Joel and Rose and Ellie, who asked to bring her new friend Dina along. We all sit at a big table out back, the late summer air warm but cooling as the sun sets whispering through the trees. The laughter is loud and smiles are all around as we all sit and chat long into the night. I push my chair against Tommy's, leaning my head on his chest as he wraps his arms around me. As I look out at everyone I can't help but be amazed and grateful that we're all here together, after all this life has thrown us, in this little corner of the world.

And how different my life would've been if some random drunk didn't hit on me at that bar, so many years ago.

General Taglist:

@frankie-catfish-morales @chaoticgeminate @janebby @astoryisaloveaffair @balekanemohafe @greeneyedblondie44 @hoeforthefictional @marvelousmermaid @hauntedmama @icanbeyourjedi @wretchedmo @sunnshineeexoxo @livingmydreams13 @adventures-of-a-noodle @sara-alonso @theewokingdead @punkerthanpascal @giggly-otter @f0rever15elf @phandoz @gallowsjoker @lovesbiggerthanpride @booksarekindaneat @charlispersonallyhell @xoxabs88xox @amneris21 @gooddaykate @avengers-fixation @paintballkid711 @harriedandharassed   @ladykatakuri @practicalghost @withakindheartx @batdarkladyvampir @justanotherkpopstanlol   @mermaidxatxheart @alexxavicry @justreblogginfics @kmc1989 @veryprairieberry @mysterious-moonstruck-musings @heartpascalispunk  

[anakinniesluv]

How The Avatar Kids Would Act When They Have A Crush On You <3

Includes: neteyam, loak, kiri, aonung

Neteyam;

He would be so cute bro

Little glances, asking you to fly w hik often, that type cute stuff

You guys have probably been friends for a good amount of time so nobody thinks anything of it

ALWAYS close to you

I mean ALWAYS.

Sitting beside you during meals, sharing an ikran with you, having a sleeping mat near yours, etc.

He would show you the cool places his dad tells him about

He would be super scared to confess

He can handle his dad getting disappointed in him, but not you.

His tail would swish around you

His siblings make it SO OBVIOUS smh

Like stop exposing him or he is boutta burst

You know that FOUL side eye he has?

Yeah, he gives that to anyone that has any romantic interest in you

Scaring them away

Still doesn't confess tho... pussy

He would muster up the courage to confess if he gets signals you like him back

Would be SO SURPRISED when you kiss him

He's an idiot

Lo'ak;

Hoe tries to impress you so hard 😭

Like you are NOT iron man you needa chill

"Look [name]!! I got a gun!!" Get back into the air before either I or someone else shoots you.

He always find the coolest stuff to give to you

Like in awa'atlu you go out swimming and he somehow finds the most ethereal, best looking shell you could imagine

Like... how?

He wouldn't really think you'd like him, in his mind he is the least important out of his family.

His dad is Toruk Makto, his mother is palulukan Makto, his brother is future Olo'eyktan, his sister is literally eywas daughter, and we'll tuk is a child.

He so wrong tho!!

Since he has his dad's features, he would subtly try and get you to call his dad attractive.

Ur getting dragged into his mischief.

You've ended up hanging upside down on a vine from a large tree multiple times.

Neteyam saves u tho 🙏🙏

You would have to confess bro

Or like you would both "confess" by just kissing?? Idk man

Kiri would be holder of gossip from BOTH of you

She's sick of it fr

So happy when you finally get together so she doesn't have to deal w ur pining

Kiri;

She's so introverted aw it is imagine her having a crush on you??

She would barely be able to talk to you.

If you guys were already close before she started liking you, than she's even more warm n clingy but drill a little flustered

How could you like someone like her? She's the weirdest out of her family

That's what goes through her mind

She's such a starer.

MAKE HER A FLOWER CROWN DHSHDVEHSU

She would enjoy doing your hair since hers is quite short

Would make sure she is the one tending to you when you're hurt

You love it too

If you're an extrovert, she admires your outgoingness and how easy it is for anyone to talk to you.

If yours introverted, she enjoys having you to herself most times because you usually aren't hanging out with others

Whoever is taller is always teasing the short one

Would confess through writing

Maybe a letter, or even writing something subtly on something she makes/gives to you

Ao'nung;

Bullies you.

All I really have to say

Hard-core makes fun of you

Doesn't attack you in ways he knows will actually hurt tho

Bro is always staring at you

If you catch him and ask why he will literally be so defensive

"I wasn't staring at your fish face!" We literally look almost the same but alr...

Would get so flustered if you were to help out with his family

It's so cute

Begs his sister to make him sound cool to you

UR NOT GONNA SOUND COOL IF UR STILL HARDCORE BULLYING ME BRO

Would whisper something that suggests he likes you in your ear

Probably something about kissing

If you reciprocate the actions than he'll confess after

He's a big meanie

[theodorecanaryhood]

The artist and the Tattooist

🏳️‍🌈Jason Todd x Male!Reader

Reader is a painter and owns a gallery across the street from Jason’s Tattoo Studio

Day one of living in Gotham and you really didn’t get why it had a bad rep. It was a nice area, at least the part you lived in. The area you opened your gallery was in a nice area too.

You did get that some parts of Gotham were not as welcoming once the sun went down, but that’s like most places.

You placed all your canvases on the stands as you looked around, breathing in deeply with a smile on your face. You could be your own boss, work your own hours. Relax.

You heard rock music playing from across the street, not too loud, but loud enough it caught your attention.

There was a guy outside the studio across the street, he was tall, muscular and had ink almost everywhere. At least from where you could see, though he was wearing a tank top and shorts, which didn’t cover much. He was carrying boxes inside from the back of his truck.

‘Todd’s place, sounds cute’ you said to yourself as you walked out of your studio, making sure to lock the doors behind yourself.

You walked across the street and went inside the studio, you looked round to see books on the shelves. Opening some and flipping through pages, it was all artwork.

The smell of fresh ink filled your nostrils as you took in the sight of the studio, it was clean. The sound of a tattoo gun could be heard in the distance.

‘Hey, can I help you?’ The tall, muscular guy from earlier said as he walked into view. Smiling at you.

Tattoos down both his arms, up his neck, you could see a bit of his chest and there were tattoos there too. His hands had some nice flower work.

‘Hi, sorry to just walk in, I just opened the art studio across the street. I heard music and thought I’d come over’ you said, trying not to blush too much, as the handsome man looked in your eyes.

‘Sorry, is the music too loud? I was cleaning and moving stuff around to make room for the delivery. I must’ve not realised’ he said, fumbling for the control to the stereo.

‘Oh no, I like Nirvana. I just wanted to come and introduce myself’ you reached your hand out, stopping him from turning the music off.

‘Great, well it’s nice to meet you, I’m Jason. Jason Todd’ he held his hand out.

‘Y/n y/l/n’ you shook his hand, smiling.

‘Todd? As in…?’ You began, Jason chuckling.

‘Yeah, Todd’s place, thought it would be a cool name’ Jason blushed a little.

‘It is’ you reassured, Jason nodding over to your studio.

‘What’s your place called?’ He asked, you narrowed your eyes.

‘Y/l/n’

Jason laughed, finding it funny that you both had the same idea of naming your studio simply after your last names.

‘I like the artwork, who’s the artist? In the books’ you asked, Jason smiled slightly.

‘Me and my best friend, Roy’ he admitted, you raising an eyebrow. Clearly impressed.

‘Wow, I’m impressed’

‘Thanks, I’m assuming the canvases you sell are your own artwork?’ Jason urged, he was seemingly liking this conversation.

‘Yeah, some anonymous artists send stuff in for me to sell, but haven’t had that privilege since last year’ you laugh, Jason stepping a little closer to you.

‘Well, if you ever get bored and want to play around with designs, we could use some help with our art books’ Jason suggested as you nodded, eagerly.

‘Same if you want to sell your artwork as more than tattoos’ you wink.

You both left the conversation on a light note as you both realised you should get back to work, but there was a spring in your step. Jason seemed like a genuine person, a genuinely nice guy. You were quite shocked, he looked rough around the edges from afar, but then after talking. He was just like everyone else.

You’d settled really quickly into the swing of everything, selling your art to various types of people.

Some were rich snobs who wanted a painting for their second bathroom, some were newly weds looking for a piece for their first home together. Some just really liked the design and wanted to find a space to hang it up.

You were so caught up in your own mind that you’d neglected that the canvases were running low. Along with work to sell.

You’d set yourself a day aside in the weekend to finish everything, which you would’ve done easily had it not been for the fact that you also ran low on supplies.

‘Hey’ you smiled as you walked into Jason’s tattoo studio, he smiled at you while cleaning up a client.

‘What’s up y/n?’ Jason greeted you kindly, as you walked to the counter.

‘Was wondering if you had any brushes I could borrow?’ You asked, Jason nodded as he pointed to a shelf.

You thanked him as you left the studio, while Jason looked at your form walking away. Which surprised even him, he didn’t register his actions till you had left. His still present client cleared her throat.

‘Sorry, let me just wrap this up’ Jason got back to his work, with you in his mind.

You’d been going at painting for a good few hours now, to the point your hand began to hurt a little. Fingers becoming stiff around the brush.

Wasn’t the best way for you to spend a Saturday afternoon, working out of hours while everyone else was out having fun.

A sudden knock at your door caught your attention, you putting your brush down and walking over to the apartment door.

‘Jason?’ You questioned, he just smiled as he lifted up a bucket.

‘Hey, thought you might want these’ he suggested, you looked inside the bucket to find more brushes.

‘Thank you’ you accepted as you let him inside your apartment, shutting the door behind him.

‘Nice place, wow, that’s beautiful’ Jason said as your painting caught his eye. He admired the design and the colours.

‘Thanks, it’s not finished yet. Still needs to dry a bit before I add somethings to it’ you said, placing the bucket on the counter. Jason turned and looked at you.

You were dressed in an old pair of blue dungarees, with paint all over your hands, arms and a bit on your face.

‘We don’t use brushes anymore, so thought you could have them’ Jason explained as he stepped closer to you.

‘Thanks again, how’d you know where I live by the way?’ You asked, curious as Jason looked to the floor.

‘You listed your address on your studio website, maybe don’t do that in case creeps show up’ Jason laughed, looking back at you.

‘Got it’

You walked over and put away the stuff you were using, putting it out of the way. Closing the pots of paint too.

‘You want a beer?’ You asked Jason, he nodded a little.

You grabbed two cold beers from the fridge and handed one to Jason, while you stopped off at the sink to wash yourself free of the paint on your body.

‘So, how long you been an artist?’ Jason asked as he sat down, sipping his beer.

‘Since I was a kid, my older siblings were more into lovers and fame. I wanted something meaningful’

Jason nodded as he felt he could relate in a way, the self-proclaimed black sheep of his family. Feeling like he had to compete to be taken serious at times.

‘You should sell this stuff to a museum, you’d make a mint’ Jason stared into your eyes, you huffed a little.

‘I’m not that good’ you replied as you walked over to the table where Jason was sitting and began drinking your beer.

‘You are, really’ he insisted, you going a little red in the face as Jason didn’t break eye contact with you.

‘Thank you. So how long you been tattooing?’ You asked Jason, he smiled a little.

‘Since I was about 20, but couldn’t do it professional yet, only opened up the studio about 2 years ago’

Jason took it upon himself to work for the money to open up his studio, he felt it too easy to ask for Daddy to give him money. Bruce would’ve done it, but that’s not the point. Jason wanted to work hard for it, not have it handed to him.

Much like yourself, you could have just asked one of your older siblings to give you a loan or your parents. It just seemed more meaningful to do it by yourself.

‘It’s great work, wish I was brave enough to get one’ you chuckled, Jason smiled brightly.

‘I could do one for you, they really don’t hurt that much’ Jason informed, ‘plus I won’t charge much’ he joked.

‘I’ll keep that in mind’

Jason still caught himself staring at you as you spoke, your handsome face just seemed so inviting to him. He’d been with men before, but he’d never been so captured by someone like you.

‘What are you doing tonight?’ Jason asked you suddenly, you shot an eyebrow up.

‘Nothing, probably working on the next piece’ you answered, Jason sighed at the answer.

‘It’s a weekend, come on get out with friends’

‘I don’t have any, not in Gotham anyway’ you replied, Jason looked a little saddened by your response.

‘I’ll be your friend’ Jason said genuine, making you laugh a little.

‘Sorry, it’s just so cute that you care’

Jason placed his hand on yours as he spoke softly again.

‘I’m serious y/n, why don’t me and you do something?’

You studied Jason’s face as he looked deep in your eyes, his gesture not changing.

‘Ok, you know Gotham better than me, show me the good spots’

And show you he did, Jason took you to all the good places he could. Bars, nightclubs, he took you to eat too. Insisting to pay for the majority of the night as it was his idea. Though you did pay your way of course, you didn’t like the thought of Jason being ‘expected’ to pay for everything.

It was a great afternoon to night out with Jason, you both got to know each other better. You even found out that his adoptive father was Bruce Wayne, which isn’t something Jason brags about.

You invited Jason back to your apartment as he seemed to not want to go home yet, so he came home with you.

‘I have something to show you’ you informed as you walked Jason to the guest bedroom.

Jason looked at the room a little confused as you pointed to the floor, sitting down.

‘Lay on your back’ you urged, Jason doing so a little unsure.

‘Wow’ he gasped a little as he lay on his back, looking up at the ceiling.

It was an art piece of the solar system painted into the ceiling, the sky of the room lit up from the product of glow in the dark paint. Purples, greens, white…it was a design no one had seen.

‘I finished it last week’ you said, Jason looking at you, seemingly in shock.

‘You painted this?’ He asked, shock present in his voice.

You simply nodded as Jason looked back at the rooms sky, mesmerised by it. You could hear the sound of Jason’s calm breathing, watching in the corner of your eye as Jason’s chest lifted up and down.

‘Can I ask you a question?’ Jason came out with, not looking at you as he still looked at the ceiling, you hummed in response.

‘You wanna go out again sometime? Like tonight’ he continued, you smiled brightly.

‘Yeah, I’d like that’ you replied, looking as Jason smiled.

He turned his head to face you as he found you were looking at him, he placed his hand on your face. Pulling you in a little as he greeted your lips with his, after a few seconds of the two of your lips meeting officially, Jason found his tongue inside your mouth. You welcomed it as you did the same.

Jason rolled onto his front with you laying on your back underneath him, still holding each other. Your lips and tongues dancing together in a sweet tango.

‘God, you’re so beautiful’ Jason breathed out as he looked at you. You pulling him in again, wanting his lips on yours.

It was a heated make out session as Jason found his jacket tossed across the room, you then found your hands in his T-shirt as you felt up his torso.

‘Fuck’ you breathed out into the kiss as Jason buried his face into your neck.

You could feel the heat coming from between your legs, as did Jason from between his. It was a perfect moment of passion, a sweet moment to end the night.

The sight of two men in a heated kiss as they slowly discarded their clothes, making a sweet night end with a hot moment. You didn’t even go to your bed, you both remained under the sky of the room, the very room that caught Jason’s attention.

You felt a slight chill up your spine as you woke up, a blanket covering your legs and groin, you found yourself with no clothes on. Laying next to a fast asleep Jason, who was also not wearing any clothes.

You didn’t know if it was morning or not, or how early or late it was. You just knew that it was a great night. Jason felt so good inside you, he was gentle and sweet.

You found your underwear in the corner of the room, where Jason threw it so he could let his mouth work you up. You smiled as you remembered the acts from last night, how good Jason made you feel.

‘Morning beautiful’ Jason smiled as he rolled over, seeing you standing up. Putting on your underwear.

‘Morning, you want some coffee?’ You sat on the floor next to Jason as you kissed his head.

Jason pulled you in for a sweet little kiss, as he held your face. While his free hand held your thigh.

‘I’ll have some please, just wanted to kiss you again’ Jason smiled, you blushed.

Jason drank his coffee while laying in only his underwear in your bed. You cleaning up on some more work.

Jason just looked at you as he admired your form and how you handled your piece, how much passion you had behind everything.

‘I’m hard, you’re making me hard’ Jason said, rubbing his hand through his hair.

‘How am I making you hard?’ You chuckled, Jason placing his empty coffee cup on your bedside table.

‘Come here, you sexy fucker’ Jason gestured with his hand, you smiled as you crawled over to the bed.

Climbing on top of Jason’s lap as you two made out again, you felt Jason’s length against you which caused you to get hard yourself.

‘Fuck’ you gasped, Jason grabbed at the waist of your underwear, pulling it down to expose part of your ass.

It was just as good as last night as you sat on Jason’s hard, friend. Jason’s moans made you so hot. You couldn’t believe the luck you had.

The hot tattoo artist across the street was now naked in your bed. With you.

It wasn’t all about the sex though as Jason felt the urge to take you for a long breakfast date. Well, by now it was more lunchtime.

As weeks went by Jason and you were getting closer and closer, even being the talk of the customers when you’d both run over the street to each other to have a quick kiss and chat.

It was special times with Jason and he made you feel, like you were the only man on earth. You did the same for him.

Though neither of you had said it yet to one another, there was love present in every way.

[sweetlikehoneystingslikeabee]

"Halloween Theme Park" Pt. 2 Wolverine and Deadpool

SORRY I GOT REALLY LOST IN THE SPOOKY SAUCE THIS YEAR. THIS IS LATE. I'M TRYING. We're going to do a series of asks based on the same prompt of going to a theme park that does horror mazes in halloween (see: HHN at Universal Studio, Knotts Scary Farm, Fright Fest at Six Flags, etc). We've done the scarecrows and I'm switching up the order. It's going to be these guys and then Rogues Party! (hopefully on time for halloween if it's not i'm sorry)

TW: Horror mazes, theme parks

Wolverine

You do need to convince him to go, partly because this man has PTSD and he's worried about his reactions. It ends up not being an issue, he's able to keep his cool around civilians dressed up. He might tense at moments, but it's relatively minor. A touch from you on his arm and he relaxes.

He is the guy who says "I'll protect you, babe" and means it. If it's just a scare actor getting too close, he just holds you and sort of puffs up so you know you're safe. Gives them a smart-ass response if they try to banter. If it's actually a rude guest or someone drunk bumping into you, he's growling, showing those sharp canines and telling them to fuck off. Just uhhhhh be careful because he'll literally fist fight for you too which might get you kicked out :/

Everything is too expensive and he's only buying this ONE THING because you were making starry eyes at it. You probably are saying you don't even need it and he's pulling out his wallet and hard cash for it. Mentally it's to make up for the fact he's going to the designated smoking area at least once in the night even if you don't partake. Helps him shake off all the weird smells of the park.

He's kind of indifferent to most mazes? He's... genuinely sort of seen everything in terms of monsters, aliens and mutants. If anything, he'd be impressed if there was a maze with something he HASN'T seen. As for things he doesn't like... Clowns. He's not scared of them, he just dislikes their smug foolishness. And there's always one that takes the joke a touch too far. In terms of fear or triggering, he really does not like anything that's tight spaces with sudden loud sounds such as, say, a WWII trenches theme.

Deadpool

You do not need to convince him to go, even if his PTSD could be a potential problem. Not because he'd do anything but certain themes or mazes could trigger him to panic a little. Will he deal with this? No! No, we combat everything with humor here, it's fine. As long as it's not a major event, there's nothing to worry about.

He will also say "I'll protect you babe" but the moment something or someone gets him good, he's jumping into your arms like Scooby does for Shaggy. If there was real danger, of course he'd protect you. This, though? Nah, he's a damsel, let him comically hide behind you with all that beef.

Other than that he banters with the scare actors. SO much joking around. And the cheesiest jokes! He sees anyone kind of body horror and fucked up and he greets them like a long-lost cousin for the bit. If he can get you to join in on the banter, that makes it even better. The scare actors that are off to the side areas, starving for interaction? He gives them everything they want and more.

He buys stupid merch. Not only does he buy stupid merch, if there's carnival games where you can win stuff at this park? Babe, pick what you want, he's got this. You are taking home at least one stupid gigantic plush that you can hardly hold. Wade is just really good at that sort of thing and likes to spoil you. Hard to get scared when you have a dracula teddy bear to squeeze!

Themes Wade really likes: Aliens, ones with the fake guns you get points on, vampires, magic- He's pretty open-minded. Themes Wade hates and potentially are Actually Upsetting for him: Storylines where a character has DID for multiple reasons, unreality (he has enough of that on his own, thank you), Military PARTICULARLY MILITARY EXPERIMENTS/TORTURE.

[wannaeatramyeon]

Okok so I read in another post a hc of all the lookism boys (+ Yenna) living in a house together and i thought what if 👀 there was a den mother of some sort. Like an older little hispanic lady that sees them in her house and just decides that yes these are her kids and she will help them find their way back. Obviously Yenna is her favorite ans she can do no wrong. I haven’t caught up with Lookism completely (just htf and mk) but i feel like the unacknowledged mommy issues have potential. Only if you can of course if this isn’t something you can vibe with i totally get it.

Oh anon, you mean THIS PIECE OF ART from Ying/@mymxnfgh?

Anon, you really asking for WWIII with all these boys vying for your attention huh. Let's give this a go, I think I may be waaaay off the mark.

Lastly, I really wouldn't be able to write hispanic well. British? Yep. East Asian? Sure. So... just casually skipping over this part of the ask.

Lookism Boys living together + vying for your attention dynamics

Platonic. From least chaotic to most. Based on this hc from Ying/@mymxnfgh

Daniel Park and Jay Hong don't really have any mommy issues, so they stay away from the general chaos. They're the 'quiet' ones (especially Jay). You make sure to keep an eye on them so they don't get left out.

Honestly, absolute sweethearts. If you want anything done, then you know you can count on these two. Low-key your faves as they don't cause any headaches.

For Eli, Warren and Yenna, family comes first. And family is Hostel. They're initially guarded, but ultimately they're still children looking after a child. You have a lot of patience for them and take them under your wing, especially Yenna.

You spend a lot of time with Warren trying to help him with his speech, and you absolutely forbid Eli from cutting anyone's hair. You threaten if he so much as touch a hair on Yenna's head then he's dead.

DG is too cool to make any overt bid for your attention. Makes a lot of sly comments to try and sow dissent, but just gets on with his own thing. He gets more enjoyment out of watching the general chaos.

The subtle rivalry of Vasco and Zack would return. Vasco, thinking Zack is a bit of dick, and Zack would of course think of Vasco as an idiot.

Their rivalry is relatively harmless, but causes a lot of headaches day to day. They would fight over washing the dishes, but somehow break everything. Doing the laundry and everything is pink. Cook to impress you but nothing is edible. You appreciate their intentions but your life would be so much easier if they just left it to you.

What can we say about Johan. We all know what this guy would be like. He is THE mommy issues. Jealous that he doesn't get your undivided attention. Clingy and needy, constantly around you. Sulks and throws tantrums if he doesn't get his way. Luckily you have Zack, Jake and Daniel to tell him to be reasonable, and Gun who threatens to beat his childishness out of him.

Having you around as a constant, comforting presence eases Johan's psyche over time. It doesn't completely undo all the hardships but it's healthy for him to realise he has someone there for him.

Goo would absolutely try and pull rank over Samuel over who gets to spend time with you. Sammy is all smiles and 'Yes, Sir" but as soon as Goo turns his back, Sammy would be immediately sucking up to you.

They never seem to fight, but they constantly snipe at each other. The insults escalate from barely veiled to full blown expletives and cursing. It's surprisingly creative. "Samuel it's a good job you killed you dad and he's looking up at you from hell because you are a disappointment." "Goo, the smell of bullshit coming out of your mouth is putting Y/N off their dinner."

(Jake and Gun loves these exchanges)

Jake and Samuel would be politely smiling at each other one moment, and then trying to kill each other the next. It's less to do with you, and more to do with their own brand of communication.

Jake, on his own, you find simply lovely and Samuel has his charms. But together. JFC.

You do try and help them work out their differences. All this mess with Gangsters and Gapryong Kim but turns out that they would fight over anything. Even something as mundane as how to cook something the 'correct' way. It's easier for them to just duke it out. They always make up in the end... but inevitably will be fighting again in the next hour.

Gun and Goo are surprisingly helpful to have around to help keep some of the others in line. And it's not like they really have any mommy issues and they can be respectful.

Peace doesn't last though. They have a short fuse, and will use ANY excuse to fight each other. Jake and Samuel throwing punches is one thing. But you worry about Gun and Goo literally blowing up the house to spite each other.

Of course this is when DG decides to speak up and egg them on.

BONUS - Seo Haesu is the stray scruffy kid that seems to always be hanging around outside. You disapprove of his dirty clothes, his overgrown bangs (No, Eli. No scissors!), and feel bad for how he's constantly hungry. You offer him free meals and somewhere to sleep.

He's wary af as first. Uses the excuse that he wants to suss you out to hang around.

Would get on well with Zack, Goo and Jake. 'Well' might be an exaggeration, but these 3 have teasing big brother vibes. Their lively ways would help to draw Haesu out of his shell... or he might strangle them.

[evenmyhivemindisempty]

I want your ranking of Boyd characters from most to least scared of talking to women,like in general,doesn't matter about what

Ooh this is such a fun ask!!! Here’s the thing - I don’t think most Holbrook characters are necessarily *afraid* of talking to women per se, but I think there’s absolutely exceptions and I bet that fear spikes quite a bit when it’s a woman they’re interested in!

Here’s my thoughts from most afraid to least afraid (as always, I welcome animated dissent!):

Cap: He’s a slightly feral wolf pup of a kid who *also* has some old-fashioned values! He’s gonna be so coltish and shy around any woman who is not his family – I don’t even think he’s attracted to women (or anyone), but I can absolutely see him flushing and stumbling over his words when he’s talking to them… *but* I think this is gonna be specifically for women dressed up in exotically feminine ways, in dresses, makeup, hair done in fancy knots. (Also applies to boy prostitutes cross-dressing, too.) I think if a woman was just running around in trousers and a gun with a dirty face, it wouldn’t be too different at all. Cap does not really know how gender works.

Clement Mansell: Clement is terrified of women and pretends he is not!! He’d never admit it, not even to himself, but he’s such a bundle of mommy issues, and it shows. He tries to be cocky around the women in his life, and occasionally gets aggressive like with Carolyn - but he also sometimes freezes like a deer when they give him a too-sharp look or say something cutting.

Donald Pierce: Yeah, he’s absolutely a little afraid of talking to women, *but* I think overall he’s a lot more comfortable with women than men. Men are frightening (and sexier, he tries not to notice), and women are safer and easier to get along with!! I think he’s maybe initially kind of spooked around women sometimes (especially if they’re real pretty or ooze intimidating confidence or competence), but once he settles in he’s gonna be sharing things with them he never would a guy.

The Corinthian: The Corinthian is not nervous around women *in general*, but there’s absolutely a handful of women he is nervous around, in a way I don’t think he tends to be nervous around anyone else (that isn’t Dream)! (Is it Calliope?? Yes. And while he was playing it cool with Rose, I think if she’d stuck around long enough/assumed the Dreaming’s power, he would’ve started to get a little flustered around her too!). Corinthian… maybe also has mommy issues, but not really like Clement does. I think Clement fears and resents women in addition to kind of craving their approval, and I think Corinthian just skips straight to craving their approval (and maybe fearing them a little).

Klaber: I think Klaber finds a certain type of femininity intimidating (and appealing), and like Cap I think he’s gonna be a little nervous around people who are decked out in certain feminine trappings. But overall, I think he’s simply too gay to be too anxious.

Ty Shaw: Ty adores talking to women!! He’s overall not very nervous around women, but he *is* fantastically bisexual, so if he sees a woman he finds hot, he’s liable to get a little tongue-tied!

Quinn McKenna: Quinn is kind of scared of his ex-wife. That’s it!

Steve Murphy: I don’t think Steve Murphy has ever been nervous around women a day in his life. In high school, all the other boys were so impressed how he always kept his cool around girls (it was because he is Gay). And then later in life he worked DEA and had to deal with female perps, female informants, female victims, and *gasp* female bosses! Steve Murphy fears no woman.

[gravesung]

quick and dirty bios for the unseen's inner circle (the sanctum)!

bc i just remembered sage and fletch are the only unseen creatures i actually have bios for.

*note — by default, these descriptions apply to the unseen as they are in shelter island. some details are subject to change based on verse. *note 2 — each member of the sanctum has a self-chosen tarot card that's left behind as a "calling card" at a particular job they claim responsibility for. in place of a stolen bounty, on top of a body, etc.

acheron ??? (he/him) — the poisoner

the emperor

dilf

calm, collected, honest but in a kind way. pretty emotionally intelligent.

as a rule, never pries into other people's business. lane = stayed in.

has a son who's in college rn! on good terms with his ex-wife.

ex-safecracker/bank robber

he makes poisons! has a little lab and everything

occasionally fletch will pull him out of retirement and make him go crack a safe. he complains about his knees

norah suman (she/her) — the engineer

the sun

lesbiab

has had a secret crush on seph for a couple years. designed her arms from the ground up, and the first point of contact when something goes wrong or seph needs a redesign/upgrade

dry humor, very blunt and often sarcastic

eyebrow piercing

habit of chopping off her hair when she's sad

makes the gadgets. makes explosives, modifies weapons, invents new shit, always thinking about new ways to do stuff. engineering as an art and a science at the same time.

also an up-and-coming tattoo artist!

orion aisa (he/they) — the forger

the moon

seph's twin brother

not a great fighter, hates using guns

eyepatch over his right eye. fletch took it when he and seph tried to escape as teenagers, along with ripping seph's arms off, which is a very normal and cool and chill reaction to have

trans lad. top surgery, took testosterone for a few years but then stopped. pretty satisfied with where he's at right now

excellent painter

suffers from hand tremors, though they fade when he paints

hector dionísio (he/him) — the muscle

the wheel of fortune

unpredictable and violent. unhinged.

will be having a drink with you and then at a hair-trigger provocation, he'll just turn around and start kicking the shit out of someone

scarily good fighter, way too fast for his muscular build

no one knows why fletch trusts him to be in the inner circle and not rat on them

unexpectedly very reliable as a teammate. he does his job very well

fixated on seph in a "constantly riling her so that she'll fight him whenever he wants" way

fixated on edith in a "why can't i land a hit on you. come here" way

pit fighter. so far undefeated

cody shimura (he/him) — the accountant

justice

the most guy ever

he's so tired.

retired hedge fund manager, went into crime because he did some digging, realized the finance industry was already in fletch's pocket anyway, and his ability to stealthily uncover those secrets impressed fletch enough to hire him on.

tries to be a plant dad but he keeps killing them

surprisingly well-trained with a gun

occasionally pulls out the most scathing one-liners in the quietest and calmest voice imaginable

sage / VECTOR (she/her) — the driver

the world

technomancer (arcane hacker)

pokemon superfan

harvard dropout

a pretty normal person, generally, probably the least traumatized out of the crew

can summon cars / motorcycles made of, essentially, compressed/hardened demon souls sourced straight from hell

also has normal, non-summonable cars / motorcycles that she likes to augment and fix up with norah's help

has a giant fluffy dog named Baby

fucking Maniac behind the wheel. the dog's name is a reference to baby driver for a reason.

if she knew about @tewwor's vector alias, she would make them matching shirts

edith winter (she/they) — the thief

the hermit

sneaky. quiet. wow shocker

fey changeling who's lived on earth their whole life, but is in contact with the human child they replaced

raised by wolves a gang, sort of collectively alongside her parents. it takes a village yaknow. they all had a hand in training her to be the insanely skilled thief she is — edith was probably the most valuable piece on their board, even at a young age

said gang was absorbed by the unseen and scattered across the world for resisting said absorption. one of edith's parents was killed in the conflict, the other was sent across the world but she doesn't know where

no one knows if they're bitter about it or not. they don't talk about it

acheron taught her how to crack safes

caro vitale / deadfall (he/him) — the fence

the hanged man

owner of the black stag, a bar and antique shop just at the northern edge of the city where metropolis meets highway meets forest.

can sell anything to anyone

no one knows a single thing about this man except for the fact that he's fluent in italian. he WILL lie if you ask him anything else. caro vitale is also not his real name

he got that thang on him (a club)

tattoos everywhere

ishal king (they/them) — the doctor

death

fae nephilim (an angel fucked an archfey and produced a very strange kid), exiled from the autumn court for death crimes before going into the human medical field as a surgeon.

nearly got arrested for experimenting with nephilim blood (their own, but whatever guys), faked their death, joined the unseen. now works happily and privately for fletch in their silly little lab.

mushroom garden

medicinal plant expert alongside their knowledge of modern medicine

ominous positivity

anah tannar (she/her) — the spy

the lovers, reversed

you know her! you love her! she's probably broken your heart!

local celebrity influencer

resident honeypot for any woman-attracted target

prefers to be flashy and stand out, but also insanely good at blending in and being invisible when need be

serial dater. never lets anyone too close, but loves to have a web of one-way connections to people who think they're her best friend or favorite ex, and/or owe her a favor (she has a book of debts)

a genuinely compassionate person underneath it all, she just leaned hard into her manipulative side after being used one too many times

persephone aisa (they/she) — the assassin

judgement

first lieutenant/right hand to amari fletch, and thus second-in-command to the unseen itself

sharpshooter, beat-upper, gunfighter, knife-swinger. if john wick can do it, so can they

cold, aggressive, hostile. deadly as fuck. if you follow this blog you probably came from hers so i won't go into too much detail SJDKHJKSD

amari fletch (they/he) — the leader

the tower (also the name they're publicly known by)

i swear they're not secretly thousands of years old i swearrrrr (yes they are) (they cheated death in a game of dice and bear the mark of cain for it)

think gus fring, netflix wilson fisk, silco — that type of person

spidery motherfucker, aka has connections eeeeverywhere. so many judges, cops, government officials in their pocket.

for the most part, fletch is satisfied with the world the way that it is. the unseen profits nicely, they have as much power as they need, and no one fucks with them (if they even know it exists)

if someone does fuck with him and his, however, he will not hesitate to make a violent and chaotic example of them for the rest of the world to see.

calm and levelheaded 99% of the time. 1% of the time, off-the-wall destructive

will take risks if they can see a benefit and the consequence of failure won't fuck up their plans.

extremely powerful in a fight (is not human) with enough raw strength to fully charge straight through a building wall by wall if they wanted to. but they don't. lmao

seph is their protegé (????) (i genuinely don't have a term for their relationship it's so fucked up and hard to describe), & they are very very possessive about it

[unsleepingtales]

Finale Time!!! This is a LONG one containing many emotions. Thank you for bearing with me through all of these reaction posts lol. See you next season. <3

Ooh only episode of the season to have the content warning in the episode not just in the description

They all look so cool!!

Return of stupendous stoats :)

Siobhan <3

The time you have left is such an ominous way to put that thanks!

Yayyyyyy

That’s just gonna be an existential crisis every time they say it

This is fun. They’re besties

Brennan is really hitting the murder bits

This is old Tutu coming back lol

Actually???

This radio bit is unhinged and I love it

I love her

Oh fuck shit pants motherfuck

He’s leaning SO hard into the contrast between the desire for peace and the murderous bloodlust

I do not believe her. I don’t think that’s how people work.

DAMN. That impression is actually really good

I love how you can see the astonishment go from Aabria-as-Tara being impressed to all of them legitimately being impressed

He said the name of the thinggggg

Okay but actually Brennan saying “that’s a pro” probably meant So much to jwc because he’s such a fan of D20 and I’m emotional thinking about it

I have lost track of what’s happening. I’m keeping up with what’s important! But the bits and jokes are so simultaneously interwoven and distracting that I am a bit lost.

(Group laughs at this motivational speech turned threat)

Oh good lord

Is that the map?

Real Pinocchio pole dancing on his nose vibes

DO THEY HAVE THE FORCE???

Yeah it makes sense that if the stoats have magic the humans do too. Or maybe this is Phoebe from inside Wenabocker.

ONE HUNDRED FEET???

The least energetic singing of grease 😂

Oh god

He’s hot 😭

Why did they have to make Wenabocker hot guys.

HELLO?????

What the fuck bitch

Oh my god that is the worst thing I have ever seen.

Well. He’s not hot anymore.

Carlos 😭

Oh my god. Aabria warned us not to eat dinner during the show but jesus

Awww the mini upgrades <3

That’s so sick actually

Brennan is pulling no punches for the finale

Humans don’t have a dick bone but they’re about to! (group laughs at the threat of dick bone violence) Do you have a dick bone inside you? Would you like to??

Oh god Brennan

What does that mean. Aabria. Aabria what does that mean.

Okay. Okay.

There are seams in the mini that remind me of MeatWolf. Does this fucking thing do the ship of theseus thing too. Because I will lose my goddamn mind.

The stroke vibes ARE so real right now Aabria you’re so correct.

I’m so stressed

LUKAS’S HAT

FIFTY DAMAGE BITCH

The art team is knocking it out of the fucking park with the spell effects

Oh right. Guns.

Oh god ouch.

Nice

Aaaaaaaaaaaaa

HAPPY BIRTHDAY?????

Please

Oh no oh no oh no

The only thought you’ve ever had

JESUS

Aabria came for pvp and she is getting it

What the fuck

I’m

upset

About this

HOW is he still up tbh

Oh god

Oh thank god but oh no

The most hollowed out a person has ever been. Oh my god

This is soul crushing.

Aabriaaaaaaaa

Uh oh!

Izzy I think you’re on the right track with the MeatWolf comparison. The mini having seams makes me nervous

Sorry I think Brennan not being able to perform that is actually gonna haunt me more than if he had. Here is this brilliant actor and improviser whom I admire so much and even he is so troubled by this that he cannot fathom how to portray it.

This is fine

Siobhan you’re brilliant actually

Get roasted

Aaaaaaaaa

Why would you provoke him

WHAT

Okay but that bullet is not as small as they’re miming. A bullet from that gun is like the size of a stoat’s hand, minimum

Erika Ishii your mind <3

ONE HUNDRED AND NINE DAMAGE TO. THE GROUND.

Hm. Troubling.

Oh damn okay.

Why the ny accent lmao

Noooooooooooo

Rules lawyers <3

Send the kids to camp!

Ey

Lair action????

Jasper that was the funniest thing I’ve seen in my goddamn life

This fucking map I’m losing it

This is all so upsetting Izzy you’re right.

Fucking shitting fuck Siobhan you’re right.

Siobhan just smiling sadly at Brennan. Augh.

This is all so deeply bad.

Yeah boiiiiii

Aabria asking are you okay. Babe what do you think??

Holy SHIT Rashawn

So many numbers

It would be completely fine if we did crack right now :)

Holy fucking shit what the fuck oh my god he’ll cook in forty minutes oh my god Rashawn Nadine Scott you’re incredible

I would believe that she can use a human gun

OH she’s actually letting her shoot a human gun that’s wild

ANOTHER ONE?

Erika is gonna cry

The dimensional dome I don’t think I’ve ever heard that but I love it so much

This is fucking incredible

WHAT

Viola just fucking killed two humans in one turn and hasn’t even taken her bonus action yet

You ARE so hot.

Ooh Aabria finally gets to do the remaining hit point reveal

YES BITCH KILL THEM ALL

The little sticking of the post it to her forehead <3

(Group applauds Rashawn as they should)

Erika legitimately is near tears god

Oh god

Oh

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Oh no

Uh oh?

Uh oh

UH OH

The suicidal ideation is real with this one folks. This is. Bad!

Oh FUCK

Brennan I’m gonna cry

Joining Erika and Jasper in the near tears club

“It’s not obligation. It’s believing that you can put your head up, and look for a day where you won’t be so tired anymore.”

I’ll be honest, I fully paused the episode and cried for a few minutes after that line. I don’t talk about my mental health a ton on here because this is a d&d blog. But that really hit me so hard.

Okay. Going back to rewatch the couple minutes preceding. We’re gonna finish the episode and it’s gonna be fine.

Everyone’s just fucking recovering from that Jesus.

It actually was his birthday??

Okay. Okay okay.

I do not have immense faith in the humans tbh but ok

Jasper

Jasper please

Ooh ok

The WORLD?

Oh good god okay. There’s no way that could go wrong. Yeah okay.

They’re just. Giving it to them? Ok! Cool!

Awww

Aaaaaaaaaa

Sobbing actually

Eyyyyyyyy ok not sobbing anymore

Back in her ho days! Do that lil dance you do!

Blood for the blood gods 😭

Hell yeah Ava. Fix the system.

Hell yeah baby

What

Just straight up. Incredible

(Cast loses it over Jaysohn the Sport Stoat)

THIRTY ONE

They go to the fucking Olympics

BRIGHTER THAN THE SUN SWIFTER THAN THE WIND

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

What a fantastic season. Aabria, thank you for being such an incredible GM. You have once again blown me away. <3

[bbq-potato-chip]

HI HAI HOPE IM NOT TOO LATE FOR TH ASK GAME BUT ✨ your silly lil green guy. yknow the one. ulquiorra. please please tell me about him ive been spectating from afar and i need to know abt him so bad. as silly or as serious as you want, say anything, ijust wanna hear abt him from a certified Appreciator(tm). be free :]

Aaaaaag!!!!! SHAKING FOAMING AT THE MOUTH !!!!

At last I am enabled HE IS MY FUNNY LITTLE GREEN GUY AND I LOVE HIM I am honored to be chosen as a certified appreciatior ANYWAY SO UM let me just explain like. What he is rlly quick because there are so many different types of guys in the whole bleach world

you have humans, who live in the world of the living and souls (dead people) who also live in the world of the living and then you have hollows which are like corrupted souls that the soul reapers gotta defeat to get them to love on to the next life (which is in the soul society)(the soul reapers also live there)(the soul reapers are also dead people)(it’s like a whole reincarnation thing)

the hollows live in this other dimension called hueco mundo they look like this (the guy on the left- hollows are more “monster-y” looking whereas arrancars are more human looking but they still have the holes where their hearts should be-hence the term hollow)

So these guys called arrancars (that’s what ulquiorra is!!!) they’re hollows that have been modified to be kind of…like a cross between a soul reaper and hollows because they have swords (soul reaper thing) but are also hollows. Basically like. You have a bear and your like let me give that bear a gun. Like that. The main antagonist is responsible for all that for reasons™️ but that’s a whole other thing in it of itself. But yeah he’s like an an evil henchmen.

but onto greater, more important things

ok completely on a surface level his charcter design is like. 10/10

I don’t know much abt charcter design but since his colors are limited he really like stands out (it’s part of the reason why I think kny characters have such good designs because they stick to the two main color plus accent color)

He’s mostly black n white with accents with green which is just so striking and the green tear makeup is just *chefs kiss* PLUS the combination of the traditional Japanese hakufu pants combined with the almost (not rlly sure how to put it) like European tail coat kind of deal he’s got going on really is such an interesting combination of two different cultural fashions. Ichigo (the guy on the right) has kind of a similar deal going on with the pants and the more western looking tuxedo looking deal and they’re design are supposed to Parallel each other for thematic reasons but PERSONALLY I think ulquiorra does it way better . But idk Maybe I’m biased!!

And there’s his other powered up forms which are just so cool

He’s so edgy. I love him this slaps so hard I cannot deny he’s so creaturecore

ok so now. Plot stuff

so basically his whole deal is that he’s a nihilist. Throughout his appearance he’s always like oooh nothing matters I don’t care blah blah blah despite the fact that he has emo make up. He does NOT put the emotion in emo. (Which, at least my impression of emo is about wearing emotions on your sleeve. I don’t know much abt emo as like a whole but if anyone has any like critique on my definition please let me know I’d love to learn more) My man is emo in style but is like yeah whatever I don’t feel emotions I don’t have a heart I’m not human don’t think of me as a human I’m a logical emotionless creature yadayada.

it’s such an interesting design choice to me because it really highlights how…hypocritical his worldview is. As the story goes on you can see his whole nothing matters deal kind of crack, towards his finally battle we see him get angry and surprised and then (spoiler alert) love right before he dies.

And you really can’t talk about ulquiorra without talking about orihime.

orihime was kidnapped basically by orders of the main antagonist because she has powers that he needs for reasons™️. It’s kind of a long explanation why so I’ll just leave it at that. But the whole reason Orihime is there was because she loves her friends, and she goes over to the side of the enemy because she didn’t want her friends to get hurt (basically the “bad guys” were like come with us or we’ll kill your friends and she was like. Well I guess I have to go because I love my friends) which is like the complete opposite of ulquiorra because he’s all like whatever friendship love and bonds are all bull. But as he interacts with her he gets (upset?curious? Not sure of the wording) about what it means to have a heart (or a bond with another person really). I just love how as we move through the arc we see him gradually more humanized, partly as a result of orihime being all like. You’re wrong things DO matter but also because he IS human in a way.

specifically there’s a scene in his backstory one shot where orihime catches him sleeping and brings him food and it just shows that yeah maybe he’s not technically a regular guy but he gets sleepy and needs a little snack!!! He’s grumpy about it but I just love how it portrays him in such a different way than we usually get to see him. (He’s embarrassed he’s so funny. “Ooooh I take naps and eat snacks 🙄so embarrassing” He’s so silly)

As he talks to orihime throughout this arc he gets CLOSER to understanding as his whole nothing matters deal keeps getting shut down by her when he tries to convince her that nothing matters. But he really doesn’t GET it until right before his death when he realizes what “the heart” is. Because orihime showed him humanity and kindness he’s like oooohhhh I get it now. But at the last second which just is so…cries

anyway. He finally realizes what it means to care about something as he dies and it’s so tragic because this is the first time he’s ever felt anything and now he’s going to die reaching out to her. It’s probably THE most tragic anime scene I’ve ever watched it kills me literally Everytime I watch it screaming crying throwing up. You know the deal!!!

Then after that whole arc is finished the author published this art . And look at him. He’s so silly look at him

Anyway. *does jazz hands 👐 * that’s my guy!!!

!!!

Also!!! Fun facts(tm)

-Ulquiorras name was based off of Spanish architect and the castle that he lives in is based off of abstract Spanish architecture . Which I just think is really neat

-His birthday is on December 1!!!

-i just think he’s neat!!!

Anyway thank you so much for the ask I am so sorry this took forever to respond to I jus have SO many thoughts and typing on my phone takes FOREVER anyway I hope I did him justice!!!