#trans fortress 2

[ozzyeelz]

Happy pride month you queers…

[jevilowo]

Headcanons about the mercs' childhoods

Because I spend far too much time thinking about this

Scout was and still is the only one of his brothers to not have black hair and green eyes, and thus the only one to not look like his Ma. Growing up he was always told he was "the spit of his father".

Soldier was popular with the girls in grade school because he beat up any boys who bothered them.

Pyro is, and has always been well aware that pyroland is a fire induced hallucination. They just don't care that they're burning people to death. ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥.

Demo would busk (play music in the streets for money) sometimes in his early teens to get his mother of his back about jobs. Also because he genuinely enjoyed it. He played bagpipes and piano.

Heavy learned how to play chess and how to box from his father. Later on, he taught the same to his sisters.

Engie was obsessed with stuffed toys when he was young, and still is (he has four plushie cosmetics and thats not even counting the animals that may or may not be alive)

Medic was born after his mother (a witch) mpregged some guy she was trying to blackmail.

Sniper was non verbal until he was six, when his dad taught him to shoot a rifle. The first thing he ever said was something like "bloody brilliant, can I do that again?"

Spy woke up in a white room when he was ten and that's his earliest memory. His agency picked him up from god knows where, completely wiped his memory and trained him (and many other kids) to spy.

Oh yeah and they're all trans

[malwar-e]

full. art piece 👍

[quotidianish]

Hm. TRANSGENDER BLAST!!

[tf2-crack-ideas]

None of these fuckers are cis

[xruffel]

SNIPER SAID TRANS RIGHTS!!! (ALSO ADMINISTRATOR!!!) LES GOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[coldspicyy]

Transgender demoman thoughts?

Pretty cool headcanon imo.

Since he's 30+ and looks like he does I reckon he'd have started his transition a long time ago. Doubt anyone would've noticed, since he can sneak around in the showers and all. That is unless someone's getting in his pants... BLU soldier was totally confused the first time they got down and dirty.

Soldier: Demoman... Did they take your whole penis in the circumcision?

Demoman: ... What?

Soldier, pointing at demo's 'dick': Do they take your whole penis in Scotland? When you get circumcised?

Demoman: Uhm... Yea, that's right lad. They took me whole knob... Chopped it right off usin' a sword... That's what happened.

Soldier: Dear god... I'm so sorry Demoman. I wish you were an American like me, so you could've kept your penis.

Demoman, trying not to die laughing: Ach no, don' ye worry yer pretty little face about it lad-

Soldier, grabbing Demo's shoulder patriotically: No, this is not right. Every free American has the right to a penis! And since you're in America now you have rights! We will have to share my penis until we've found who is responsible for this mess but-!

Demoman: Share your- 😳 Soldier, I don' think that's how it works."

Soldier, totally deadpan: What? No it's easy. You get to partake in my penis whenever you'd like to feel better about your own penis being stolen from you by Scotland. That's a perfectly normal and American way to deal with this issue.

Demoman, reaching for his bottle: I'm- okay, ye ken what? I'm nae sloshed enough fer this.

[snailimp]

HEAVY TF2 TUMMY ‼️‼️‼️

OF COURSE!!!!

[aprofessionalwithoutstandards]

The other 11 months of the year I feel like I relegate tgirl Merasmus to like "pure personal headcanon" territory but then I play Halloween mode again and I'm just fucking blown away by how much tgirl fail Merasmus the wizard really really has

[chul-sinusoida]

i <3 my woman

[ozzyeelz]

can’t believe medic tf2 got top surgery and still has the biggest boobs on the team..

Hes probably heard comments about his chest from the entire team, It’s not his fault they’re so big😔

[jevilowo]

TEAM ASCENDED FORTRESS 2

An AU by me in which the mercs ascend to their ultimate forms

Oh God tumblr wrecked the quality-

More about the AU under the cut!

WOKE SCOUT: she started taking estrogen and instead of fixing her it made her worse. She gets into fights on twitter about neopronouns and has successfully cancelled everyone she doesn't like at least once. However, as cancel culture isn't real, this only lasted about three seconds for each. She managed to pull Ms Pauling also which is pretty cool.

SOLDIERSUNE MIKU: the ghost of Shakespearicles told him to dress as Miku and redo the salem witch trials. Only knowing one witch (Merasmus), he finished this quickly and now roams the country with Zhanna (who is now Zhannagane Miku after Mikus metal counterpart) spreading malice and wonder through the power of AMERICAN SONG COVERS. He uses a wig for the Miku effect, but is working on growing his hair out also.

MITOSIS: Pyro and Engie were shagging one time and they came so hard they did mitosis. Now theres 23 babey Pyros (count em) and Engineer is a single dad. There's a lot of Pyro Mitosis Lore™ in my head, but the basics are that they evolve into either humanoid, beastial, demonic or celestial Pyros eventually.

TAVISH, KING OF THE LOCH NESS: he did it he blew up that bloody sea monster and now he is king of Loch Ness. The self loathing has died down a lot which is great for him but his body is still a scrumpty distillery which is eh. Still, he has funky water powers and his partners Soldiersune and Zhannagane come to visit often.

KEEPER OF TIME AND SPACE GUY: Heavy was mad, he knew he'd been had so he shot at the sun with a gun. Instead of being a show off like that bitch Juno, he had a nice philosophical conversation and chess match with Time and impressed Time so much he was appointed as the guardian of Time and Time's partner, Space. His guns (the six angel thingies pictured) can turn into celestial weapons which helps in the protecting but people don't shoot at the sun so often so its a relaxing enough gig really.

GODDAMMIT ENGIE: after realising how much more efficient Gunslinger was than a lame ass human hand, Engie succumbed to his hubris and eventually replaced all his body parts with robot parts. Including his dick which led to the Mitosis Incident. Anyway. His chest is a dispenser which makes projects pretty convenient and he has a mini-sentry attached to each arm and leg, making him a walking weapon. This did not help with the god complex, but it helps with the single father thing.

THE INFERNAL DOCTOR: Medic kept attaching more souls to his own and selling them to Satan for power. Satan got so sick of this eventually he attempted to beat the shit out of Medic. By now Medic was slightly more powerful than Satan so this ended with Medic absorbing Satan's powers and basically taking his place. Somehow, his relationship with the guy who is now a celestial being was unaffected by this. If they really tried they could probably ascend even further. To godhood, perhaps. In any case, Medic becoming The Devil from The Bible did nothing for the god complex.

???: Sniper just kind of fucked off into the woods one day god knows what happened to him but Scout's convinced she saw him for like three seconds a week ago and "YOU GUYS HE HAD ANTLERS I SWEAR-"

RETIRED AND BECAME A FUNCTIONING MEMBER OF SOCIETY SPY: yeah. He's very happy with Scout's Mother (Maureen), and he's letting his roots grow out (his spy agency made him dye his hair black). He's even making an effort to be a good parent to Scout, bought her the trans flag ipad cover and everything, but she just keeps trying to cancel him. Maureen's sure they'll work it out between themselves eventually, but until then she has to keep finding more secure hiding places for the ipad (the best so far was the time she buried it under a tree a mile away, took Scout at least four hours to find and retrieve it that time)

There's also YURI MS PAULING, in which she pulled a whole polycule of beautiful women, but I'll cover her in another post.

Also TERFS DNI please. Woke Scout is just Scout being Scout (which is to say a bit stupid), and assuming all trans women are like that would be ridiculous. So fuck off.

[quotidianish]

They live in my head rent free (Emesis blue WIP below cut/headcanons

Emesis blue animatic WIP (I might finish it might not)

Following up on a random idea I had. Zhanna had to get those genes from somewhere slash jay (also I have to practice my mandarin head in hands)

I think heavy’s built more like his mum while Zhanna’s built more like her dad. Both of them are quite sturdy he looks rather starved in the first few pics because. he was

[tf2-crack-ideas]

Soldiers chosen name is soldier

He uses jane sometimes though but tells people its his middle name

When he told people he figured out a name he liked they sorts assumed john or something

They were wrong

[joking-hazard]

I have been sick so have sick doodles