#but I still hate the pushiness like fuck off please

[snugglyporos]

// hi did you know I'm autistic and hate having my shit touched and moved and that it really pisses me off when people do it because I like things to stay the same and I don't like other people messing with it because I had it just so

[barcaatthemoon]

rugby girl || lucy bronze x reader ||

lucy introduces you to her teammates, and they all very quickly come to the same conclusion.

minors dni, 18+, smut ahead.

you really did hate seeing lucy so worked up. the woman was rarely ever nervous about anything, and yet, she was a wreck over the idea of you meeting her teammates. the two of you had been together for a long time, far too long for neither of your friends nor families to have been introduced. you had accidentally run into a couple of her teammates before, but that was really it.

"luce," you whined as you pulled her onto your lap. it was easy to manuever her to straddle your thigh as you sat on the couch. lucy grumbled a little about getting the apartment ready, but she made no moves to stop you as you pulled her down to grind against you. "relax. i am more than happy to help if you can't."

"i am relaxed, i swear," lucy told you. you nearly laughed at the way that she had said it. her jaw was clenched and her teeth were grit together so close that you swore it had to hurt a little. still, lucy was insistent that she was fine up until the moment that your hands ran over her thighs.

lucy melted into your touch in the same way she had at least a hundred times before. you let your hands inch up further and further until they had slipped beneath the bottom hem of her shorts. lucy spread her legs a little wider and lifted her hips up to let you tug her shorts down.

"i thought you had to get the apartment ready," you teased. "isn't there so much to do?"

"i need to change, this is helping," lucy mumbled against your lips. you smiled into another kiss. lucy was always a little pushy with her kisses, but the teasing remarks died as soon as you felt her arousal against your fingers.

sex on the couch right before company wasn't an ideal situation, so you kicked lucy's shorts and underwear under the couch as you lifted her up. lucy let out a little squeal as she sank down onto your fingers. a rush of arousal was shot through lucy's body as she thought about the position that you had her in. your strength was nothing short of a turn-on for the english defender.

"fuck me, please," lucy began to beg as she started to bounce on your fingers. you let her use you to get off as you carried her back into the bedroom. lucy was quickly getting lost in her own pleasure. "(y/n)!"

"shh, it's okay." you sank down onto your knees in front of the bed that you had just laid lucy down on. her complaints were quickly quieted as your mouth replaced your fingers. you knew that it wouldn't be enough for long, and the next time that lucy opened her mouth, you slipped your fingers back inside of her.

your name fell from lucy's lips like a prayer as she grabbed your head and forced a little more pressure on her clit. you kept lucy on the edge, not giving her enough to cum until she asked for permission first. you got to sit back and watch her cum, two fingers working in and out of her at a relentless pace as your thumb toyed with her clit.

"come on now, we've got just enough time for a shower if you don't dawdle," you told her. lucy didn't want to move, so you helped her up onto her feet. the two of you were a bit rushed in getting ready, but lucy was out of the bedroom just in time to greet the first few of her teammates who were arriving.

the voices made you nervous, worse than lucy had been earlier. fucking lucy usually worked both ways, but now you were suddenly afraid of what they'd think of you. you were sure that they were all perfectly nice women, but you had always had a bit of trouble getting along with those of your own gender. you weren't exactly the most feminine of women, and growing up, it had been hard having to hear all of the backhanded compliments and straight insults about your appearance and body.

"i'm sure that (y/n) is on her way out. she usually doesn't take this long after a shower," lucy told her teammates. they were all very eager to meet you. there had been an obvious change in lucy's demeanor, and keira was especially interested of what could have caused it. she knew that it was definitely sex related, if only for the little extra swagger in lucy's normally cocky walk.

"where did the two of you meet?" ingrid asked.

"sport award show," lucy answered. she glanced back at the bedroom, relieved when she finally saw you begin to walk out. "oh, here she is. come on in babe. it's just alexia, mapi, ingrid, irene, keira, and sandra right now."

"hello," you greeted the group. you gave a small wave, unsure of what to think when mapi's jaw dropped. everybody sort of looked over at the tattooed defender in confusion until she spoke up.

"you, you're (y/n)," mapi said. you nodded slowly, unsure of how to proceed. "i, um, i am a fan. you are a badass, way too cool to be dating lucy."

"excuse me!" lucy exclaimed with a huff. you laughed as you pulled lucy into your arms for a kiss. she shrunk back a bit, which was when mapi seemed to notice something else. unfortuantely for lucy, keira also noticed it, but she was nice enough not to say anything.

"she's got you wrapped around her finger," mapi laughed. she had no room to talk, infamously whipped beyond recognition for ingrid. lucy was about to say something, but you stopped her with a small squeeze of your arms around her waist. "i like how you play, it's aggressive. lucy, is she so ag-,"

"mapi!" ingrid scolded with a sharp slap to mapi's chest.

"only when she's been bad," you answered. lucy's cheeks were burning bright red as her teammates dissolved into fits of laughter. "i'm going to get a drink. do you have something yet?"

"can you get my gatorade from the fridge?" lucy asked you. you nodded and ran off to go get it. you stayed in the kitchen for a little longer than you needed to just to let lucy's teammates give their first impressions of you.

"a rugby player? that's definitely not what i expected," ingrid said politely. you smirked a little to yourself, knowing exactly what they meant. lucy gave the impression to most people that she was effortlessly dominant. she had never been that way with you, not that you were complaining at all.

"i wasn't really either, but i'm happy that we're together. she's good for me," lucy said as she glanced over towards the kitchen.

"yeah, i can tell." lucy's gaze flicked over to keira, who was sitting on the couch with a warm smile on her face. their relationship had been long, far too long for them to just give everything up. their romantic feelings were long gone, but the trust and care in each other would never fade. lucy hoped that she could build that with you, but that she could do things differently.

eventually, you did make your way back to the living room again. more of lucy's teammates began to fill the apartment, and it felt like a party. they all seemed to have stories about lucy to tell, and you even offered a few of your own to everybody. with each of your own stories, you noticed the look in mapi's eyes as she stared intently and listened.

much to lucy's dismay, it was obvious that the two of you were going to become fast friends. in your eyes, mapi was just a physically smaller version of you. the two of you shared a lot of interests, and your spanish was much better than lucy's, so the two of you had quite a few little jokes going early. you were saddest to see her go at the end of the night, but only until lucy was pulling you back to the bedroom for some cuddling and drunken kisses.

"they all love you," lucy said happily. her tone quickly switched however as she mumbled the next part much louder than she had intended to, "but they all think i'm a bottom."

"you kind of are babe, but that's okay. i wouldn't want it any other way," you reassured her. lucy looked at you with completely lovestruck eyes before you pressed a kiss to her lips. it was crazy sometimes how easily you could wind her up or calm her down. "get some rest, okay? i'll make you breakfast in the morning."

"i love it when you cook for me," lucy mumbled into the side of your neck.

"i love you, luce."

"i love you too, ya big teddy bear." as if for emphasis, lucy gave you a big squeeze as she tugged you closer towards her.

[thetriumphantpanda]

where have all the good men gone? | javier peña

Take The Weight Off His Shoulders - Chapter Three

Chapter Summary | A date, supposed to get your mind of Javier, goes terribly, and he's the only person you can think to call that will make anything better.

Chapter Warnings | Mutual pining, slow burn, sexual tension, flirting, alcohol consumption, protective!Javi, misogynistic comments (not from Javi), (1) man being a pushy douchebag (also not Javi), swearing, mentions of the drug trade - nothing else I can think of.

Pairing | dbf!Javier Peña x F!Reader

Word Count | 3k

Authors Note | I am truly having the most fun with these two and I hope you're enjoying their story so far! Things are definitely going to be heating up soon, so please hang in there, it'll be spectacular when they finally do get spicy with each other! If you're enjoying this then comments, asks and reblogs are my lifeblood and if you'd like to support me further, please consider a donation to my  Ko-Fi.

I no longer use taglists. Please follow @thetriumphantpandanotifs to be notified of new updates.

Series Masterlist | Main Masterlist | Ko-Fi | Series Playlist

“I promise he’s good fun,” Liv’s voice speaks through the phone, cradled to your ear by your shoulder as you skim through your wardrobe, “Nice, and age appropriate.” She teases. 

“Shut up,” You grumble, still annoyed that you’ve allowed her to talk you into this at all, “This is still a terrible idea.” 

“You were the one complaining about Javier Peña being a bad idea,” She defends herself, “And you also could have said no, too late now.” 

You sigh because she’s right. You’ve been trying for the past week to convince yourself that finding someone else might make wanting Javier go away, even just a little bit. Someone your age, not entangled in your family dynamics, or at least you’re hoping anyway. Liv had suggested someone she knew from work, a nice boy, two years older than you, his head screwed on, a managerial position at work. Sensible. 

“I have no idea what to wear.” You groan down the phone, there are plenty of dresses you could choose, but somehow, it feels like this person you don’t know doesn’t deserve that of you. 

“Put those jeans on,” Liv speaks, crunching coming down the phone line, clearly she’s snacking like she always does, “The tight ones, makes your ass look phenomenal, and the lowest cut top you own.” 

“Liv,” You chastise, “I’ve never met him before, I’m not fucking him tonight.” 

“I didn’t suggest you did,” She chuckles, “Just give him a taste of what’s to come.” 

“Unbelievable,” You mutter, but follow her advice anyway, pulling out a shirt that cuts low, scooping out your jeans from the drawer, “Right, I gotta go and get ready, but if this is awful, you’re entirely to blame, okay?” 

“Hearing you loud and clear girl,” She chuckles, “Have fun and don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.” 

“Goodbye!” You chuckle, hanging up. 

It’s still light out, so you opt to walk to the bar in town. It’s not all that far, and the air has cooled enough by the time you leave that it doesn’t feel too stiflingly hot. The bar is not one you would have chosen, one of the more upmarket establishments in town. You wish you could go back to your normal dive bar, with its slightly sticky floor and the smell of fried food. You give him the benefit of the doubt though, maybe he’s just trying to impress you and you can’t fault him for that, can you? 

Liv told you he’d be sat at the bar in a blue shirt, and there’s only one person it can be when you get close enough, “Victor?” You ask, stood next to him. 

“The one and only,” He smiles at you, standing from the barstool to give you a hug, which you allow, “You look hot.” 

“Thanks,” You chuckle, sitting down on the stool next him, noticing a drink already there for you, it’s a cocktail, bright pink, and you know you’ll already hate it, and you do when you take a sip, wincing as the fruity blend moves down your throat, “Oh, it’s very sweet.” 

“I thought it was a safe option, most girls love this drink.” 

You’re tempted to make a comment about this clearly being his favourite place to bring his dates but you bite your tongue, working through the necessary small talk as you try and drink it as fast as you can so you can choose something you might actually enjoy. 

“So, Liv told me you’re a journalist,” He comments, sipping his glass of whiskey, “What kind of things do you write?” 

“I mainly cover news about the drug trade and how that affects the town.” You explain, taking the last sip of your drink, flagging the bartender down. 

“Pretty morbid,” He shrugs, ordering himself another whiskey as you opt for a margarita, “Surely a girl like you should be writing about fashion or something.” 

You scoff, “So I can’t write about things that are important to our town because I’m a woman?” 

“No, I don’t mean it like that,” He tries to backtrack, “Just that it’s intimidating, is all, might put people off,” He chuckles then, “Although not me, like my girls with a bit of personality.” 

You roll your eyes and don’t even try and hide it as you sip at your margarita, much better, you think. It carries on like that for another hour, Victor and his thinly veiled misogyny and his boring, surface level conversation. He tries at some point to put his hand on your knee, but you jerk away, moving so he can’t touch you. 

“You want another?” He asks when you finish your third drink, “The night is still young.”

“No thank you,” You say, trying to be as polite as possible, “I have work tomorrow so probably best to head home.” 

You try and insist that you pay for your part of the bill, but to his only credit, he insists on covering the tab but does then try and wrap his arm around your waist to walk you outside, which makes you want to hit him more than anything. 

You stand next to him on the pavement outside the bar as the doors close behind you. You can still hear everyone else talking inside, but you have no idea what to do. You want to go home, but it’s dark, and you know you’d told your dad that Victor would walk you home, but you don’t want to spend another minute in his company. 

“So, am I gonna get my goodnight kiss?” He asks, trying to take hold of your wrist to pull you into him. 

He’s stronger than you, so he does sort of succeed in pulling you into his body, but you manage to put your palm against his chest to push him back. 

“I don’t think so.” You cringe a little, trying to lean back as far as you can with his hand pulling your wrist. 

“You’re joking right?” He scoffs, “I paid for your drinks, try and be interested in what you said and you’re going to refuse me?” 

“Look, I don’t mean to be rude,” You speak, trying to talk the situation down, “I just don’t think this is gonna work.” 

“Don’t need to tell me,” He snaps, “Such a fucking tease turning up dressed like this, but you’re really just a prude.” 

“Oh fuck off man!” You try and push him again, succeeding in doing it enough for him to let go of your wrist so you can put some distance between you, “I don’t owe you shit.” 

“Forget it,” He turns around and walks away, leaving you on your own, “Probably would have been a shit lay anyway.” 

You’re tempted to call back but realise it’s not worth it, so you let him wander off, leaving you on the sidewalk on your own with no idea what to do now. You would walk home, but if your dad see’s you on your own, he’s going to kill you for being silly enough to walk home alone after dark, and then find Victor and kill him too for being a jerk. 

You slump against the brick wall of the bar, rooting through your bag, there’s enough cash to go back in and get a drink and try and calm down a little, then, your fingers brush against the card you’d slipped in there a few days ago. The name and the number, and the few coins in the bottom of your bag, draw you to the phone box at the end of the street. You’re putting the money in and dialing before you can convince yourself it’s a silly idea. 

He picks up on the third ring. 

“Peña.” It’s so formal. 

“Javi?” You ask, trying to keep your voice level, but ultimately failing. 

“Are you okay?” Is the first thing he asks, and he sounds frantic. 

“Y-yeah, I’m fine, I just-” God this seems so stupid now, mainly because you don’t want to admit you were on a date, you don’t want to make yourself seem unavailable to him, “I was on a date and it didn’t go well, he was meant to walk me home and well, I don’t want him to, but I don’t wanna call my dad.” 

“He hurt you?” He seems cross, protective even, which makes your tummy flutter. 

“N-no,” You sigh, “He got pushy when I wouldn’t kiss him but I’m fine.” 

You can hear him shuffling around on the other end of the phone, can hear the jangle of keys, “Where are you?” 

“I’m at the phone box at the end of Grant Street.” You say, you’re about to speak again when Javi beats you to it. 

“Stay there, go inside a store or something and wait for me, I’ll be there as soon as I can, okay?” 

“Okay,” You nod, like he can see you, “Javi?” 

“Yeah, querida?” 

“I’m sorry.” 

“Don’t you dare,” He scoffs, “Never apologise for needing my help, okay?” You can hear the sound of his truck engine in the background, “I gotta hang up to drive, but I’ll be there soon, promise.” 

“Okay,” You sniff, “Thank you.” 

You can hear the dial tone before he can reply, so you hang the receiver back up and head into the liquor store on the other side of the road. You smile at the clerk, who asks if you need anything, you shake your head, tell him you’re just waiting for someone and then spend the rest of the time looking out of the window. 

He’s parking up in a worryingly short amount of time, and as you walk from the store you worry that he put himself in danger driving so fast to get you. He’s opening his door and climbing down from the truck. As soon as you’re close enough, he’s got his hands on your shoulders, searching your face to make sure you’re alright. 

“I’m fine Javi, I promise,” You insist, holding gently to his arms, giving him a smile, “I’ve probably overreacted.” 

He lets his arm drops and signals for you to get into the truck, following swiftly, “If he made you uncomfortable it’s not an overreaction,” He speaks, turning the truck back on and pulling away, “He still around?” 

You shake your head, “I don’t think so.” 

“Good.” 

It makes you wonder if he means good because he won’t bother you anymore, or good because it means he won’t be tempted to do something about his blatant disrespect. You decide not to probe that one, but file it away for later. You’re driving down the street when your stomach grumbles, reminding you that you’ve not eaten since lunch. 

“You hungry?” 

“I could eat,” You mumble sheepishly, “I’m sure there’s something at home.” 

Javi nods, but drives straight past the turning he would need to take you home, driving straight on instead and turning off a little later. You’re about to ask where he’s taking you when he pulls into the parking lot at McDonalds. He parks up and tells you to stay where you are. 

You watch him as he walks away, perfectly broad back, shirt tucked into his jeans. He really is a vision in every way when you look at him. He’s striding back out a little while later, brown paper bag in one hand and a soda cup in the other. He passes them both to you as he climbs back into his seat. 

“What’s this?” You ask, taking a sip of the cold soda. 

“Cheeseburger, extra pickles and a Sprite with extra ice.” 

Yet again, he’s managed to amaze you with his observation skills. There was a time where he’d taken a trip with you and your parents, just a day out of town somewhere, and you’d stopped to get food on the way home, you’d made this exact order, turned to him and told him it was your favourite, and somehow he’d filed that away for right now, when you needed it the most. 

“Thank you.” You speak simply, reaching in for the burger, unwrapping it carefully before taking a bite. 

Javi can’t help but watch out of the side of his eye as you eat. God, you looked beautiful. Jeans that looked like they’d been painted onto your skin, showing off all those perfect parts of you. A shirt that was enticing without being too much. Fuck, he wanted to reach over, use his thumb to wipe away the tiny bit of sauce that had gathered in the corner of your mouth, push it into your mouth and let you lick it off his thumb. 

You ball up the wrapper your burger had come in once you’ve finished, dropping it into the paper bag, picking up the cup of soda to suck the Sprite through the straw, “You alright now?” He asks. 

You look at him, small, sad smile on your lips, “Just can’t help feeling there’s something wrong with me.” You shrug, offering him a sip of your drink which he declines. 

“What do you mean?” He asks, wanting to reach over to you, put a comforting hand on you, but deciding against it for now. 

You shrug a little, leaning your head back against the seat, “No-one ever looks at me in that way, I suppose,” You answer honestly, and he wants to tell you it isn’t true, that he thinks of you exactly like that, no matter how much he shouldn’t, “I’ve been with one guy in my whole life and I don’t think he ever really liked me, was only with me because I was the only one left out of my friends.” 

“Did he say that?” 

“He didn’t have to,” You shrug again, “He never really made an effort, never took me out, never really wanted to sleep with me much either, I guess I was just easy for him,” You say, “Convenient.” Is what you finish on. 

“It isn’t you,” Javi speaks, turning his head to look at you, resting it against his seat in much the same way you are, “First of all, college boys are always idiots, don’t let that be your base line,” You snort and turn your head to look at him now, “What did tonight’s idiot do?” 

You shake your head at him, “He was just a misogynistic asshole,” You add a shrug, “Apparently because I’m a woman I should write about fashion and not anything that actually matters.” 

Javi scoffs, because in his experience, women make the best journalists, quiet, unassuming but they always knew how to pull strings and get what they wanted and he doesn’t doubt you’re the same, “Take it as a compliment,” He offers, “Sometimes it’s best to intimidate boys, and the ones that you don’t?” He asks as a rhetorical question, “Those will be the men worth your time.”

You chuckle a bit, rolling your head on the headrest behind you to look back out of the front of the car, “You’re just saying this to make me feel better.” 

Javi reaches over, takes hold of your hand and gives it a slight squeeze before he’s letting it drop again, almost like he’s been burnt, like he knows he shouldn’t have done it, “I am saying it to make you feel better, that’s the whole point, but it’s true,” He shrugs a little in his seat, “Don’t feel like you’ve got to rush into that side of life either, you’re still young, there’s plenty of time for you.” 

You hum in agreement because you know he’s right, it’s what everyone always says to you in these circumstances, but somehow, coming from him, it means more. He’s older than you and although you’ve no doubt that he’s known plenty of women in his time, he’s in just the same predicament as you are. 

“Will you take me home?” You ask softly, “I’m tired.” 

He nods, starting up his car, pulling out of the parking lot and finally driving you back home. 

He pulls his truck up just down the street from your house, far enough away that your dad won’t be able to see, but close enough that he knows he’ll be able to sit and wait to watch you get in safely. He cuts the engine and turns to you, giving you a soft smile, trying to tell you that it’ll all be okay. 

“Thanks,” You speak softly, “For all this, made a shitty night not so bad in the end.” 

“Always,” He smiles back, “I mean it when I say you don’t ever need to worry about calling me.” 

“I know,” You smile, and he feels his heart swell at the sight, “Well, goodnight Javi.” 

He doesn’t really register what’s happening until it’s too late. You drag your body across the truck instead of moving to the door to open it and press a gentle kiss to his cheek. It would be innocent enough if it wasn’t for the fact your lips press into the skin just far enough away from his mouth so as not to cross a line, but not right in the middle of his cheek either. It’s the softest way he’s been touched in a long time, and he can feel himself wanting to grip onto you, smash his mouth to your own and finally scratch the itch that’s sitting under his skin. 

You pull away, but before you can open the door, he’s taking hold of your wrist and moving closer, pressing his own kiss to your cheek right back, further up your skin than you had done to him, but it’s a kiss to your skin none-the-less, one that floods his chest with hope, a feeling he hasn’t really felt in years. He keeps his mouth there probably for a little longer than he should, committing the feel of your skin on his mouth because he knows this is as far as he should push things, but he also knows that he now needs to know what the rest of your skin feels like under his mouth. 

He pulls away and when he looks at your eyes, all full of hope and want, the same look he’d seen countless times in Colombia, whether he was promising a visa or led next to someone in bed, and he knows he shouldn’t have done it, shouldn’t have encouraged these kinds of feelings, but he’s done it now, he can’t take it back, wouldn’t want to if he could either. 

“There’s nothing wrong with you, querida,” He says softly, “Nothing wrong with you at all.” 

[amymbona]

i need angst so !! thinking about patrick with an introverted, shy, kinda closed off reader who sometimes needs to just be by herself and isolates and ghosts the people around her because she gets overwhelmed. and of course patrick gets mad because he doesn't get it and he confronts her about it and they get in a huge argument idk. i feel like she's a lot like a female version of art and she gest sneaky and mean when she's angry so i just imagine patrick seeing this part of her for the first time and they end up saying the worst things to each other

thank you <33

Patrick angst Zweig <3

I think that, as much as Patrick tries to be a good guy, he's just really oblivious and fails to notice important stuff. It doesn't mean that he doesn't care - no no no - but he's simply kinda stupid. And unfortunately, he's having issues with figuring out certain social cues.

So when your responses are dry, only sending simple yes and no to his messages, Patrick gets really pissed. What exactly is the issue - do you suddenly hate him? Has he done something so terrible that offended you and you weren't even able to talk to him about it? Or is it the harsh truth that you don't want to be friends with him anymore? While you're (somewhat) peacefully asleep, hoping to get past your anxiety in that way, Patrick spends hours pacing around his room, literal steam shooting from his ears.

And then he storms into your dorm in the middle of the night - because Patrick Zweig doesn't understand the concept of time and because Patrick Zweig doesn't care if somebody wants to get rest and mainly because Patrick Zweig doesn't like waiting - so you're forced to listen to him rant, half asleep, in your pyjamas.

"I don't understand it, I just - did I do something? - or what is it? Why won't you just tell me?"

"Patrick, just go to your place. We'll talk in the morning," you beg him with a sleepy voice, eyes closing.

He stomps towards your bed, hands on his hips, staring down at your tired frame, "Why? Why won't you just talk to me? You've been ignorin' me since the start of the week. What the hell's your issue?"

"Just go," you plead once again, genuinely not in the mood for any of it.

"Don't tell me to go - goddamn - don't sleep now! Just talk to me, for fuck's sake," Patrick is still pushing his luck, unable to respect your wishes. He is determined to get this answer. And unfortunately, that pushes you over the edge.

"Why do you have to be so pushy all the time? Oh my god, just leave me alone - why don't you get it? I'm not texting you cause I wanna be alone!"

He's dumbfounded, totally.

"What the hell, Y/N?"

But you're having none of it, sadly, too upset about this whole treatment, about Patrick constantly chasing you, glued to your back, not allowing you a single moment for yourself. You love him, but you need to be alone as well, "You're after me all the time - do you have an idea how frusttating that is? I can't be with you all the time, Pat. I'm not a robot, I need some time for myself too!"

And you know Patrick is quite an emotional guy, dependent too. He requires constant reassurance and presence of his loved ones - so much, that he's blind to all the hints of discomfort, unable to understand the world doesn't revolve around him.

"Oh," he nods, stepping away from your bed slowly, "Okay."

Like a harsh shake, the realisation that you have unintentionally hurt his feelings wakes you up. But you couldn't hold it back, you just couldn't, when you were so overwhelmed, "Wait, Patrick-"

"No no no," he cuts you off, "Good night."

And then you're left alone. But suddenly, you don't want to be alone. You want Patrick to come back, to be here, lay next to you and talk your ear off. To rant and rant and rant until you're asleep, unaware of anything he's saying, but snuggled closely to his side. Hurriedly, you pick up your phone and text him.

Y/N: pat [0:28 am]

Y/N: sorry [0:28 am]

Y/N: i'm sorry [0:28 am]

Y/N: come baxk [0:28 am]

Y/N: please [0:29 am]

Y/N: sorry [0:29 am]

Y/N: :( [0:29 am]

[seen by Patrick Zweig]

[fxckn-sxck-fr]

Please 🙏🏻 please 🙏🏻 please 🙏🏻 can I get your thoughts on yandere dom Hal Jordan‼️

Begging on my knees ❗️❗️

𝐘𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐃𝐎𝐌 𝐇𝐀𝐋 𝐉𝐎𝐑𝐃𝐀𝐍…

!!! 18+ THEMES, GN reader, heavy non-con elements, coercion, mentions of manipulation/intimidation/threats/kidnapping, semi-public, jealousy, possessiveness, biting, slightest mention of a possible cannibalism kink, brief daddy/sir kink, praise, degradation, angry sex, rough sex, somno, cockwarming, Hal is a menace to society and absolutely disgusting (I say as I drool over him).

This ask is giving me psychic damage in the best way possible.

Hal does not take “no” for an answer. It doesn’t matter if his charm and charisma doesn’t work on you; he’ll find a way. Maybe he just needs to sprinkle in a little manipulation, or somehow scare you into his welcoming arms. Is that also not working? Hm, as much as he hates being the bad guy, he’s not afraid to use intimidation and threats towards you if the ends justify the means. Still not working? Well, damn. Guess he has to kidnap you. And to think this all could’ve been avoided if you hadn’t been so difficult.

This man is absolutely shameless, unable to keep his hands off you even in public. Yes, it gets ten times worse when he’s jealous. If it comes down to it, he absolutely will drag you off for a quick fuck. Does that make him a tiny bit possessive? Maybe. But, hey, for what it’s worth, he’s great with his mouth. Your pleasure usually comes before his; it’s the least he could do before he fucks you into oblivion.

Hal’s definitely a biter. There, I said it. And not just little nips, either. I’m talking full-on teeth marks on your shoulder, deep enough to bruise or even draw blood. This kind of goes hand in hand with his possessive side and maybe a hint of a cannibalism kink?? We don’t have time to unpack that, so we’ll leave it at what I know for sure: Hal Jordan thinks it’s very hot when you have bite marks all over your body. Especially when you’re wearing his jacket over them.

And if I say daddy kink, will y’all come after me? Cuz, yes, Hal is disgusting like that. He’d be over the moon if you hit him with the d-word. But, hey, he’ll take a “yes, sir” or “no, sir” just fine, too. Compromise, amiright?

When it comes to dirty talk, Hal can dish out praises and degrading comments equally. I think it depends on how much coercion he had to do; he’ll praise you if you took the easy way, degrade you if you took the hard way. Simple as that. Though this also depends on what you’re into. Again, your pleasure usually comes before his, so he makes mental notes on what you like.

Speaking of coercion though, remember that Hal doesn’t take “no” for an answer. Your choices are the following: accept his advances, or be forced to accept his advances. Should he need to force you a little, he’ll start off encouraging (“it’s okay, I’ll make you feel good, I promise”), then get a little more pushy (“come on, you know better than this”), until he’ll eventually just take what he wants (“hey. Stop struggling. I don’t wanna hurt you”). While he somewhat recognizes what he’s doing is wrong, he easily justifies it by reminding himself it was your choice to do this the hard way.

“Shh, everything will be fine, babe. Just let me take care of you. Yeah, there you go… you put up one hell of a fight. I’m sure you’re tired.”

God, he is an absolute menace when he wants to be. Should you ever piss him off, there’s a chance he’ll fuck his frustrations into you. This man has enough stamina to go for a long time, so I wouldn’t recommend testing him. Unless if you’re fine with not being able to walk for a couple of days. Then go for it!! It’s your call.

If you’re into that, a good way to piss him off is trying to weasel out of his grip. Hal always has an arm around you, be it in public, around the house, while you sleep… bro just canNOT let go. I think he’s secretly insecure about you running off, so for you to feed into that? Yeah, no. Not a good idea. Unless, again, that’s what you’re going for. Then it’s a great idea!!

Y’all, I’m gonna be honest. You may wake up in the middle of the night to him fucking you. He just can’t help himself, okay?? He didn’t want to wake you, and hey, what you don’t know won’t hurt you, right? Just know that if you catch his freaky ass doing this, he will feel absolutely no guilt. I mean, why would he? We’re already past the point of shame. If anything, he’ll double down and whisper nasty shit in your ear until he cums. And, yes, he’ll stay inside of you til the morning. Good ol’ cockwarming.

Oh, yeah. Cockwarming. He’s big into that. And it’s lowkey not even a sexual thing; he just really likes the intimacy. It’s very common for him to be inside you while the two of you watch TV, your back pressed against his chest as he leaves gentle kisses on your neck. This is when Hal shows his softer side, even going as far as resisting the urge to bite you!! What a big step for him!!

All in all, yan Hal is a mixed bag. As long as you’re compliant and don’t go out of your way to make things hard for him, I’d say he’s pretty mild. It’s just that his sex drive is through the roof, especially after long missions. Does he bring you with him to space? You know what, probably. He just wants to be near you, okay? Or, actually, maybe it’s more of the other way around; he wants you near him. The specifics are important.

But yeah. Good luck covering up those bite marks!! Hal likes to leave them in obvious places on purpose (he’s an asshole like that).

[allthemeninmybed]

Coming to the surface Part I

Summary: Reader is a member of the band’s photography crew and they are barely ever on the same page with Vessel. They both think highly of one another but it’s merely professional. At least they think. Pairing: Vessel x mid-size/plus size fem!reader Warnings: non, YET Word count: 948 A/N: I haven’t written anything since 2021 so… I hope you like it, please, don’t forget to give me feedback! 🖤 - “You alright?” – You ask him softly. You know he doesn’t like you much but you still try to be nice to him. - “Just dandy.” – He pauses with an eyebrow raised as he looks at you, shaking his head before turning to the side. There was a part of you he did like, but he refuses to concede that. He has a self-preserving attitude that had a history of keeping people at arm’s length. Everything is upside down now. Somebody revealed their identity, alongside with birth certificates and addresses. You know who it was, it was somebody close. She was to Vessel. You know he’s disappointed beyond measure because he would have never thought she would do something like this, ever. - “I know it’s fucked up. I just… I won’t bother you, sorry.” - “No, it’s fine. Not your fault, is it?” – he pauses with a huff as he turns to face you and folds his arms against his chest. - “No, it’s not. And it’s not about me but it hurts anyway.” – you try to convey that you care for them, that you care for him but you don’t want to seem pushy. He turns to the side, his gaze drifting past you as he takes in his surroundings in quiet contemplation. His body language speaks volumes, showcasing his frustration but perhaps he’s looking for an outlet. For some strange reason it looks like you are about to become that. - “Tell me, were you aware of any potential plans? Or do you just take pictures when we’re on stage?” – he’s like a wounded animal, trying to insult you to make himself feel better. He's going to lash out and you’re the one who’s going to take it. Fuck. - “Do you really think if I had known I wouldn’t tell you?! Or try to stop her? Look, Vessel, I know that we’re not best friends here but I would never do anything to hurt you. Or the band. And even the fact that you suggest otherwise is hurtful.” Vessel sighs, feeling guilty when he realizes that he should’ve worded his questions better. - “I know.” – his eyes drift away as he rubs his neck to ward off the tension. - “I’ve always hated that bitch anyways.” – you point out the obvious fact he’d probably known, you weren’t subtle about your feelings. - “But if you want to shout at somebody... here I am.” - “She used to be a friend, you know. I thought I could trust her.” – his eyes harden as he pauses to compose his thoughts, his stance becoming rigid. His lips twitch in to the world’s smallest half grin, it’s the closest thing to a smile you’re going to get from him. - “Yeah, I know. Having misplaced trust is the fucking worst.” – how you wished you could hug him. It would be as comforting to you as to him, you think to yourself. He nods, biting his lip as he stares at the carpet. Vessel struggles to keep his emotions in check as the magnitude of how badly he’d been betrayed hit home. The very person he trusted and worked with for the past two years was responsible for the leak. A sigh escapes him as he looks back at you, blinking away the sheen of tears in his eyes. That’s when you decide to risk it. You open your arms a little, looking at him the most reassuring way. You don’t want to overstep boundaries. His eyes dart from the carpet to you, the offer clear in your eyes and the invitation tempting. It’s so enticing that he feels his lips twitch. However, the look in your eyes is so genuine that he had to take the chance, allowing himself to lean on you and pull you into his embrace.

You can’t believe he’s actually hugging you. It isn’t very comfortable since he’s very tall so you pull out of his embrace and point to the chair beside you. He sits down, not saying a word and hugs you immediately as you stand in front of him. His head rests on your chest, which feels inappropriate at first but it doesn’t bother you. You don’t give a fuck, this feels so good, so intimate, so necessary. Leaning further into you he breathes out softly as his eyelids slip closed. The urge to break down and just sob his heart out into you is strong but he refuses to give in and risk embarrassing himself. You start to caress his head and his hair as you’re hugging him. You hope it’s not too much; it feels so natural to do this, you didn’t even think about it, you’re just doing it. His hands are gripping into your body, he’s clinging to you and it feels heavenly. God, you never want this hug to be over. As your fingers sweep through his hair his breath quickens. This is his release; this is the intimacy he’s been craving and it would be a lie to say he isn’t enjoying it. His hands grip your waist, his eyes closed as his lips part slightly. You want to tell him so much but you can’t find the right words, nor do you want to break this soothing, intimate silence between the two of you so you do something bold. You kiss the top of his had while stroking his hair. A shiver runs through his body, the intimacy catches him off guard. His eyes search for your face with an intent he hasn’t realized was there until this moment. He holds his breath back, looking up to you his eyes seem even more enticing. There's a part two coming! Stay tuned loves 🖤 Part II

[saltymothball]

my unpopular takes on beetlejuice beetlejuice SPOILERS!! (long post)

(i am a fan of the original pls do not come for me) these are just my thoughts on the sequel :D please feel free to add yours too

context! im writing these notes as i watch so theyre a little disorganized

for reference i also rewatched the original immediately prior to the sequel

not opening with the classic beetlejuice muisic ?? even the stage show opens with that music where is it (EDIT- restarted it and it actually does open w the music, but it is much less fun/campy an and more of a spooky remix so i forgot)

its not plot necessary but i do wish we learned how BJ fixed his shrunken head and death by sandworm

where are the maitlands ???? 0 mention of adam and barbra at the beginning ?

BJ's ex wife intro was a very creative concept but i wish they did it with more sfx props and less cgi/green screen

Astrid is like very boring, theyve done nothing to get the audience (me) invested in her?? disney wish vibes like who is she

call it a headcanon i feel like lydia wouldnt be this fucking awkward of a parent ?? she had good role models ie adam and barbra (even if her own parents werent as active, by the end of the original movie it implied they were now living in a healthy family dynamic

the mother daughter drama feels really forced, reminds me of the out-of-place tension between wednesday and morticia in the 2023 show

all angles are super close up and feel like horror angles. the scene where astrid befriends that boy ?? felt like someone was gonna come up and kill them the ENTIRE interaction (edit i guess that makes sense but it nerfed the scene)

IMMEDIATELY knew his parents are dead btw. not showing their faces is so clearly they are dead. not an ounce of mystery. theory the boy might be a ghost too?

theory astrids dad isnt dead bc Lydia cant see him

the witching hour wrong ?? last i knew it was 3am not 12am. weird thing to get wrong

its like not a silly campy vibe ?? its like uncomfortable.

dont like lydias new man hes pushy and gross

i miss adam and barbra

it doesnt make sense that no one taking lydia seriously ? delia knows she can see ghosts and has also experienced beetlejuice

lydias fiance is a horrid excuse for a partner (how tf did she meet him like did he just walk in bc the plot needed another person to hate lydia

not the dead protester joke :(

the spill-your-guts/pregnancy felt really idk,,, icky??? dont know how to explain it but it uncomfortably long

follow up- a lot of the visual ghost gags felt very gross/gorey ? like in the original movie the gags were inbetween silly/sexual/spooky-but this one feels more like blood and guts instead of spiders and snakes. exhibit A) otho casually shoving corpse barbra out of the way when looking at the closet with delia / exhibit b) the guy with the cigarettes at the end of the original

theory that astrid is going to end up seeing ghosts by the end of the movie

love the "eeee!" noise BJ makes when people say his name

ok BJ with the guitar after lydia tells him off was legitimately funny

i know astrid is an angsty teen but my god she is so hostile towards lydia

calling it at 56mins the boys parents are SO dead bc they deliberately didnt have lydia meet them

listen i have nothing against jenna ortega but it feels like she is type-casted to play exactly one character now, like let the girl play something other than a monotone gothy teen

"they found a loophole and moved on" okay whatever that means

astrids awkwardness w this ghost boy is pretty cute. he is so definitely a ghost though

yup called it hes a ghost

"my mom was telling the truth... shit" lmao

this boy feels very sus bc why are you trying to bribe her w her father

still no info on how lydia and rory met ??

MURDER HOUSE ?? TH BOY IS A MURDERER ??? okay thats a good twist ill give them that

astrid going into the afterlife to see her dad feels very "lydia going to the afterlife to see her mom" plot from the stage show ?

astrid honey you have too much faith in this ghost boy

oh my fucking god delia did you really get poisonous snakes....so on brand for her

Beetlegeuse literally carrying the whole movie

every scene he's in is absolutely giving

william dafoe is pretty good too but adding him just feels like he is william dafoe and not the character hes playing (who is also an actor)

delia correcting herself from saying fuck is really funny like girl was that scripted

okay ok astrd seeing her dad working in immigration was pretty neat

i had actually forgotten abt BJs ex wife until now ? doesnt seem like she actually adds much to the story beyond giving BJ a new reason to pursue lydia... which he was already doing...?

are they all going to end up in the afterlfe wtf

the afterlife desert takes place on the fucking moon of saturn ?? okay

is it just me or is the sandworm not claymation... like maybe its just the way it looks but i swear it looks like they cgi'd it but then cut down the frame rate

damn lydias husband really got eaten by piranhas.. what a way to die oh my god

there was no real stakes to astrid switching her soul? they resolved that so fast like lydia just grabbed her and they ran

oh their husband/dad is back now everything is fixed...? like all that hate towards her mom is now gone bc her mom was telling the truth about seeing ghosts? dad just resolved the only conflict

beetlejuice didnt even help get astrid back he went on a pee break and the plot progressed

love bad cop william defoe

"are you filled with fear and trembling?" "yes im shitting my pants" absolutely gold

BJ on fetchquests this whole movie fr

the soul sucking lady please she ate bobs nametag :(

ok wtf they really solved ghost boy dilemma in 5 seconds, BJ ex machina... like he rlly just got him like that ??? anticlimactic

ok good astrid apologized for being a shitty kid

rory please stop kissing lydias neck

i kind of hate the modern nods like the self securing seatbelt in the priests car, or the influencers at the wedding, really weird unnecessary detail

BJ and Delia wedding crashers my fav

how did Beetlejuice get into the church ? if he is a demon like previously established, shouldnt he NOT be able to step on holy ground

enjoyed the slapstick moment of lydia punching rory, good moment

her red dress omg !! pretty

BJ himself is just too funny, making the priest sing top tier

i still miss adam and barbra :( if they can cgi that dead guy in star wars i think we couldve brought alec baldwin and geena davis who are in fact still very alive and look great

they really didnt make me interested in BJs ex wife other than she is pretty and looks like morticia addams ?

BJ making everybody partake in singing is very silly

everybody dancing at the wedding scene must have been fun to film, everybody looks like theyre jamming

lmao whos dog was that in the hallucinations ?? is that the dog who killed the maitlands

"ghoul squad" ok monster high

oh finally his ex is here

lydia so casually pushed out of the way lmao

why does BJ have more etherial powers than every other ghost?

offering rory to the soul sucking lady is so good

theyre really just gonna sandworm for the plot resolution again ???

his ex wife was a threat for all of 4 seconds

lol the legal marriage loophole was kinda funny

is delia like forever dead ? is she a ghost now? is beetlejuice dead?

i still love delia. "i will find charles and we will haunt you both" good for her

are the influencer wedding guests dead

everything got wrapped up very quickly

good on delia for still loving her husband even though that shark absolutely annihilated him

what ?? astrid is married now???

WHAT ??? SHES GIVING BIRTH ?????

oh ok its a dream

having a second pregnancy bit felt really weird

they alluded to another sequel :(

please remember i am actually a huge fan of beetlejuice !! no hate to the franchise these are just my personal opinions on the sequel. i would love to hear your thoughts as well !!

[xiyouyanyi]

Modern Era At Last: Spider Queen Special

My original idea for this AU starts with "Filling up the Celestial Realm", so we'll just say that S1 works more or less the same unless otherwise specified, and let the real diverging point start at the Spider Queen Special.

-Hell no, the trigram furnace isn't kept in the throne room, it is where it is in Tusita Heaven, Lao Tzu's place. And the place is quite empty and quiet when they aren't refining elixirs and the flames have been extinguished.

-Which means MK and Pigsy/Tang wouldn't be going to two different buildings, just two wings of the same building.

-It's also Lunar New Year, during which all the Kitchen Gods went back to submit their reports to the Celestial Host, so most of the officials and guards are gathered around the administrative halls.

-To celestials, it's more of a daily meeting, though. A.k.a. "Those last few hours where you are stuck in the office, desperately wishing you are somewhere else."

-Red Son has access to the place because PIF, as the former Grand Mistress of the Wind Bureau, keeps a backdoor key. The spider minions sneaked in by turning themselves tiny and latching onto the jet's wing before the formation activated.

-The gang landed in the Wind Bureau sky-harbor, right next to Lao Tzu's place, and immediately ran into Lady Hanzhi, known to Red Son as "Auntie Wind"——which, coincidentally, was not too far off from her most well-known title nowadays, Feng Po. 

"Please, that name makes me sound so old! Why not Sister Wind?"

-She acted like she always does: your overly helpful, enthusiastic, pushy aunt who seems to delight in embarrassing the youngsters, and immediately jumped to conclusions, asking Red Son if he was taking his cute dragon girlfriend on a date.

-Upon being met with an unambiguous "NO!" and some desperate attempts at backtracking ("We are just…not hating each other at the moment!") she chuckled, but was perceptive enough to understand they were in a bind, and immediately agreed to help out before Red Son even got the full story out.

-Naturally, that left Mei a little suspicious. "Uh, we are like, stealing your stuff? Ya' really don't have a problem with that?” 

-Hanzhi just laughed and was like, "You think I care about my job? Or want to be here? Even though Little Red's mother left me quite the mess to sort out, I'll take an old friend's kid over The Reasons We Are Here at any time of the year!"

-Which, to her surprise, failed to be assuring when she opened her Wind Sack and told Red Son and Mei to get inside.

"Okay, not to be mean or anything, but that's just…sus." "As suspicious as a bunch of mortals sneaking around in funny modern day robes? My, whenever I thought your fashion standards could not get any worse than these awful queues and melon hats…but ah, I'm rambling." "The point is, your friends are going into Tusita Heaven while the furnace is unlit. No one will be there, except for the new furnace-fanning boy and…That Lady." Hanzhi wrinkled her nose. "Ugh, the old witch with a broom. Pretty easy to fool, but remember, stay at least five Chi away from her, or your entire mission is a bust." "You two, however, are going into the Peach Garden. With actual guards and visitors, and one of my junior brothers as its new warden. You are not getting in, or out, without someone leading the way."

-Kui Mulang is still working as a furnace-fanning boy——he could have been done with it long ago, had he not intentionally fucked up during the Three Rhino Kings fight out of spite and got his sentence prolonged. When the place is not in use, he's put in a cangue and chained to a pillar in the storage room.

-When Pigsy and Tang entered the lab sector in search of the golden pill, he took the latter hostage through a combination of deception and the space-warping magic of stellar gods. 

"Now, hog, pick that vial of liquid off the shelf, and pour it on these chains," The Wood Wolf Star exposed his teeth in a feral grin, as he poked at Tang's back with the ethereal dagger,"very, very carefully. If you spill a single drop on me, my hand may just slip."

-Jiang Ziya's dead and deified ex-wife, Ma The Broom Star, makes an appearance as the cleaning lady on duty.

-She can passively curse people AND immortals with bad luck: not kill-your-entire-family, ruin-your-life level of bad luck like what the Taisui Star or the Dipper Mansion deities are capable of, but things like making people slip and fall on their butts, sneeze/burp at the most embarrassing time, arrive late to urgent meetings, etc.

(Also, firing comets out of her broomstick like a true witch.)

-MK, affected by her Aura of Inconveniences, fell right into the (unlit!) furnace while trying to sneak past her using the building's support beams. She heard the scream, but thought he was one of those bratty immortal acolytes and responded to his cries for help like the bitter old lady she was. 

"Serve you right for horsin' around, boy! Now sit in there and think about what you've done, till I'm done cleaning this place! Goodness gracious, I'm never so glad to have a daughter, not that my good-for-nothing ex-husband didn't try turning her against me, yeah, some Grand Master of Strategists you are, Jiang Ziya…"

-MK then committed the grave error of asking "Huh? Jiang Ziya? Who?" and was subjected to a long, incensed, caustic rant, most of which he tuned out for the sake of his own sanity.

-Meanwhile, at the Peach Garden: Hanzhi walked in without much of a problem, using the excuse that she is bringing her junior some tea right after getting dismissed from the meeting. Said junior is one of the 28 Lunar Mansions: Bi Yuewu of the White Tiger Mansion, a.k.a the Moon Crow Star.

-In ancient Chinese astrology, the Bi Star was seen as having power over rain, and the section of the sky it was in charge of housed the Tianyuan constellation, or "Heavenly Orchard". His Stellar Beast form, a one-legged crow, is based on Shang Yang: a mythical bird that would dance before every huge storm like a goofy weather forecast guy.

-He excels at controlling cloud formations, to the point he got "borrowed" by the Wind and Thunder Bureau more than some of the Water-aligned stars after deification. That did not translate to battle prowess, though, and he mostly relies on his formations to misdirect, trap and stall enemies for the rest of his team to handle.

-After Kui Mulang's sentencing, Star Lord Mao had taken over as the substitute leader of the White Tiger Mansion stars. As a fellow bird star and the anxious secretary to Zi Huohou's shy intern, Bi looked up to him, a lot. 

-Today happened to be his shift——one of the 28 Lunar Mansions is exempt from the daily meetings, to watch over their sector of the sky. Like most celestials, he was used to Hanzhi just walking around, finding people to chat the moment she was off-work, and wasn't surprised when she came out of the treasure storage room without her Wind Sack.

"Little Red, you've actually been here before, I trust you know where the kitchen is? Go there, grab a peach, get out, and please please please don't try to go into the garden proper if you can't find one. Just return to this room and wait, Auntie Hanzhi will handle it." As the shrill screech of a defensive formation triggering echoed through the pavilion, and Bi leaped out of his chair, Hanzhi could not help but sigh and thought, Of course these kids tried to go into the garden, why wouldn't they.

-Except they didn't try to go into the garden. It was the spiders, and a tiny immortal girl with an embroidered ball.

-Yep, it's Li Zhenying, Nezha's little sister, only mentioned once in JTTW! Here, she's a bit older and the holder of one of Nezha's magical weapons, the embroidered ball.

-In Zaju plays, this ball contains a shit ton of demons and evil spirits, subdued by Nezha and now working under his command, but that's not safe for kids so it just has a mouse inside now.

-Specifically, Lady Diyong, who's serving her prison sentence in there after her second capture and acts as Zhenying's unwitting hamster-slash-playmate. 

-The way the ball works: it can keep beings captive and enable the holder to use their powers, like a magical Pokeball. Once something is inside, it can only be released by the one who initially captures it.

-So Li Zhenying used Diyong's power to get under and past the defensive formation undetected, because…she's bored and wanted to practice some Cuju, and just happened to run into two very lost and frustrated spider demons.

-They decided to stalk Red Son and Mei together, in their mini-spider forms——it was the former who had the backdoor key, after all, and without that, they wouldn't be able to get back to the mortal realm safely after snatching up the three items.

-So they crawled into the Peach Garden and lay in wait. And waited. And waited. And no one came. Then, when they tried to leave, they couldn't, and kept circling back to the same place until a 12 year old popped out of the ground and yelled "Stop right there, bug people!"

-They laughed. They stopped laughing when one of them got sucked into the embroidered ball like a Pokemon. The sight of a huge, muscular spider guy desperately running away from a little girl was still pretty comedic, though.

-He didn't last for long. Diyong started screeching inside the ball because ewwwww, spider people, gross! She's not into that and she doesn't want them as her future neighbors! Get them out of here, at once! 

-Zhenying found her terror quite amusing, but ended up doing so because all the screaming was getting annoying. And that was what Hanzhi and Bi saw when they charged into the depth of the formation: Li Jing's youngest kid, swinging her toy around in a circle and sending two black dots flying into the sky.

-Hanzhi let out a silent Oh no at the sight. Bi let out a loud "You WHAT?!" as Li Zhenying explained her encounter with the spider people, and commented that pest control must be quite hard if all the bugs in here could grow into people. 

-Bi proceeded to have a nervous breakdown because I let a spider demon infestation happen right under my nose and trapped Devaraja Li's daughter inside my formations, oh fuck, oh fuck, I'm so dead.

-He was too busy curling up in a ball and rocking back and forth to notice Hanzhi slipping away, an immortal peach hidden in her sleeves, to retrieve Red Son and Mei. Back at Tusita Heaven, however, the rest of the gang weren't having a good time. 

-Ma had finished rambling about Jiang Ziya's great-great-however-many-times-great-grandson, the "Biggest Shame of Qi", and was about to narrate the start of their lineage's miserable downfall with a spiteful glee in her voice.

-MK asked her why she was so angry, which just made her more angry.

"Why am I so angry? Oh, I have no idea! Maybe it is because my bastard ex-husband wrote my name onto his oh-so-mystical-scroll and made sure I can't even DIE PROPERLY, boy! I raised his daughter after he divorced me and ran off to fight a war with his sorcerer friends, and this is how he repaid me——" "No, I mean, why are you so angry at people you've never met before? They are your kids and grandkids too, right?" "Exactly! I never got to meet them, and that's why they are a bunch of pathetic, dull-headed degenerates who got played like a fiddle by their own noble clans!" MK severely doubted that. "I never got to set them on the right path, grab them by 'em ears and scold them properly, match them up with good wives that weren't their own half-sister——for heaven's sake, that Duke Xiang, what was he even thinking?!" She paused. When she started speaking again, the indignance had drained away. "I never got to see any of them with me own two eyes, or speak to them, because I wasn't in their ancestral temple. I never got to meet any of them, and now they have been dead for thousands of years, and I…I couldn't even blame all of that on Jiang Ziya."

-For the first time since MK met her, the old woman fell silent. He was about to return to his own crisis of self-confidence when the entire furnace shook and violently toppled over, spilling him out onto the floor with a yelp.

"Go." She said, the tip of her broom still smoking, without sparing a single backward glance. "Scram back to your quarters, boy, before more of the Broom Star's bad luck rubbed off on you——"

-Then the lab's other wing exploded.

-Let's rewind back to the moment before this, when Kui Mulang was holding Tang hostage and threatening Pigsy into destroying his chains with a vial of corrosive chemicals. 

-With no other choice, he complied, and the moment the last chain came apart with a sizzle, Kui Mulang shattered the cangue via his Stellar Beast transformation——but not before trying to stick the dagger into Tang anyways and failing, due to his golden barrier triggering in a panic.

-Turns out, it was these magical chains that truly shackled him and his powers, and the cangue was just additional humiliation. 

"Ah, a thousand thanks to you," the beast's eyes narrowed into a slit, as it turned towards Tang, who was desperately trying to scramble away inside the golden bubble, "Golden Cicada. Now that you are a Bodhisattva, I bet your Body of Manifestation would taste even more divine."

-What ensued was a pure horror movie chase sequence, as the pair ran for their lives, toppling over shelves, throwing anything they could get their hands on at the Stellar Beast in the hope of slowing it down.

-The explosive reaction between two reagents did end up accomplishing that. Not hurting it permanently, but the big bang managed to draw Ma and MK's attention and stopped the former from asking too many questions.

-Turns out, being one of the 28 Lunar Mansions didn't actually protect you from the Broom Star's field of mundane bad luck.

-It wasn't enough to defeat Kui Mulang, and her comet attacks were doing no lasting damage, but he kept missing his targets by a tiny margin, or tripping and falling like a Looney Tunes character, or MK's staff just happened to knock a chunk of the ceiling loose and pin him down briefly…

-The problem was, her bad luck field worked on her allies too, and there were a lot of mutual misses and wacky fails, and the consequences were worse for MK than for their opponent.

-Red Son and Mei were on their way back with Hanzhi when they saw the commotion from afar; they basically dashed right into that one Community meme. 

-Hanzhi assessed the situation briefly, told them she'd deal with Kui Mulang, while they went and grabbed their mortal friends, as well as whatever they needed from the lab, fast. Then she stepped back and unleashed the full might of the Wind Sack.

-The giant AOE attack caught all three combatants, lifted them off the ground, and firmly slammed them into the nearest standing wall, allowing Red Son to grab a very disoriented MK and rush away in the chaos.

-The fight was still ongoing when the gang hurriedly dragged the furnace into their drone, activated Red Son's backdoor key, and blasted off into the mortal realm. It didn't last much longer after the Thunder Bureau reinforcements arrived, led by Heavenly Lord of the Nine Thunders, Wen Zhong.

-Wen Zhong was a loyal man of principle in life, even more so after his deification, when he was basically made the head of the Celestial Justice Department (Thunder Bureau isn't just in charge of weather, but also divine retribution and punishment.)

-He's what a lot of people think Erlang should act like: grim, serious, utterly dedicated to maintaining order and justice, and an absolute powerhouse (he also has a third eye, btw).

-Hanzhi knew she wouldn't be getting any leniency from her senior brother this time, so she didn't even try to argue when he ordered his Thunder Generals to detain everyone involved and take them away for questioning.

-Bi Yuewu was interrupted from his mental breakdown by Star Lord Mao, who, like the majority of officials, had just been released from their end-of-day meeting when the Thunder Bureau received an emergency message from Tusita Heaven and flew off in a hurry.

-Putting two and two together, he quickly guessed that their old squad leader had broken free, and went to gather the rest of the White Tiger Mansion stars for their own emergency meeting. Bi was the first person he seeked out, and the situation…didn't look all that great.

-But Rooster Man, being the good bro he was, listened patiently to Bi's story, and told him it wouldn't be a problem. He'd take Li Zhenying home to her brothers, let them come up with a cover story, while the spider problem…well, that was what his Stellar Beast form was for, wasn't it?

-A few miles below, two tiny spiders, still falling towards the mortal realm, suddenly heard a rooster's crowing and were struck by the worst headache they ever experienced.

[mostofthingsmostofthetime]

I just finished the first episode of Heartstopper, so here are some of my thoughts in no particular order.

The opening song is cool (will probably look up the shows soundtrack like I did with XO, Kitty).

Why did the camera focus so much on Charlie's bag & Elle's drink? Is it product placement?

Wow, no hate to the actor, but Charlie's eyebrows are THICK!!!!

Tori is beautiful but also kind of looks like a ghost (I think she’d be great for the role of  Violet Baudelaire from A Series Of Unfortunate Events) & why was she so pushy about the "dream guy" thing? Like let the poor boy breathe.

Is Nick's actor that much taller than Charlie's? I hadn't noticed.

I’m sorry, but knees are so weird to me lol. Also obligatory, 🎵 she's a runner she's a track star🎵.

Wait, is that PE teacher that will later interrupt the team theorising about Nick & Charlie's relationship? It's crazy how they’ve found actors who look so much like the characters in the graphic novels (other casting directors should take notes).

Ok fair enough about wanting your team to be good & wondering if the quiet, skinny, nerdy, boy is even into sports but the shit about him being gay is so stupid (bet it was Harry that said that).

Glad Charlie didn't get injured learning rugby, lol.

Nick's shorts seem a lot smaller than Charlie's ones do, but maybe that's the costume designer's way of helping Charlie’s actor look more skinny?

Omg Stephen Fry, what are you doing here lol?

Wow, people weren't kidding. Olivia Colman really did show up just to say one line. What a legend, lol.

Ben, did you really make Charlie walk all that way for such a lame ass kiss? Also, let him talk about his Christmas, you jerk!

I don't think that Form tutor is very good at his job (while Nick thankfully turned out to be nice) it’s usually not a great idea to put the skinny, gay, nerd that has already been bullied with the bigger, popular, seemingly straight, athlete, especially at an all boys school!

Ben, you dick. Like I get wanting to keep your relationship secret, but you did not need to pull the 'who the hell are you!' card. All you had to do was say hi in a confused/uninterested tone (then apologise later). If anything, your reaction came off more weird than what Charlie did.

I'm sorry, but I don't get the leaf animation. I mean, I GET it, just why leaves? Why not flowers or hearts or something? It just doesn’t seem that impactful to me, but maybe they have a deeper meaning that I'm just not grasping yet? If so, please let me know.

Ok, so I'm torn over the gay teacher. Like artistic? That's cool. Those glasses? Cute. Him giving Charlie a safe space to eat lunch? Great. Him being worried over Charlie potentially being bullied again? Awesome (take notes, Form guy), but his advice to Charlie seemed slightly lacking. Obviously, honesty & communication are important in relationships, but I'm a little surprised that possible safety concerns weren't addressed at all, especially from a fellow gay guy. Like I get that he doesn’t know the kind of guy Charlie's "dating" & that just because someone doesn't want to come out yet doesn’t mean they should be labelled as dangerous but internalised homophobia can make some people lash out & after everything Charlie's been through his clearly more likely to be vulnerable to situations like that.

Nick is a golden retriever in human form, they're 100% correct 😊.

Isaac? What happened to Aled? I hope he still shows up. He may be quiet, but he was so cute during Charlie's 15th birthday in the graphic novel.

Interesting to get to see Elle's time at Higg's (fuck that transphobic teacher & whoever was throwing sandwiches at her). Sad she doesn’t have any friends but I'm sure that'll change when she meets Tara & Darcy. Wow, is it strict over there, though, like you can't even be on your phone at lunchtime? Damn! Surprised they did it this way, though, as I was assuming they'd just make Truham co-ed so all the characters could be in the same place.

Tao, my guy, the drink thing is sweet but that hair is.....certainly.....a choice 😅.

The shots of Charlie looking at food, without eating, make me ☹️.

I gotta be honest, the montage of Nick & Charlie saying hi to each other was a little cringy to me compared to how it came across in the graphic novel, but they're meant to be teens, so I'll let it slide. It's also an effective way to highlight how differently Charlie's "boyfriend" treats him compared to an acquaintance.

Ben's hand covering up Nick's smiley face got me like ☹️/😠. They're not even together yet & I already felt like telling him to get off Charlie, like that boy is not for you! It’s ridiculous, lol.

Ben what you did was fucked up but it's hard to be scared of someone who looks so much like a meerkat in a wig (no hate to the actor) also did it seem like he just....skidded away when Nick pulled him off Charlie? Like, was the actor wearing Heelys lol? Or had someone just mopped the floor without telling anyone? Also, it's lame to wear a coat when you're cold? What in the toxic masculinity are you fucking on about Ben?

Omg the bathroom scene was so adorable, but I wanna know what kind of pen Nick was using because being covered in that amount of ink is crazy 😆.

Overall, it's very cute. I like Nick & Charlie. It’ll probably take a bit longer for me to really care about the other characters. Ben can catch these hands! And I’m looking forward to watching the Narlie relationship develop.

So while not overly ground breaking (though obviously important for LGBTQ+ rep) it's definitely enjoyable in a comforting sort of way which (considering medias fascination with marginalised suffering) is obviously important for queer youth but also must be quite healing for queer elders. Because you deserve wholesome, cheesy, romance just as much as anyone else.

[faetaiity]

hey if it’s okay with you can you please write the rise turtles helping reader out with overstimulation? thank you! also delete/ignore if you don’t want to!

Hi! yeah, sure! I can write for this! But it's gonna be how I experience overstimulation, which makes me irritable, passive aggressive and want to be alone for the rest of the damn day- You didn't specify poly or separated so I went with separated because it was quicker to write.

Yeah, this is 100% self-indulgent.

Separate! Rise! Turtles x Overstimulated! GN! Reader

Post Format: Headcanons

CW: Crying, Leo getting depressed, mentions of separation anxiety + arguments, and Reader wanting to be left alone in their room for multiple hours (Not necessarily Isolation, but wanting to be in an environment that they can control) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Raphie:

Is the best in terms of reaction

The worst reaction he has regarding you snapping at him is irritation, he will almost never snap back at you

He (mostly) doesn't blame you for your outbursts, he knows what you're going through, and he knows that you'd never snap at him without a valid reason

Hates when you stay in your room for hours by yourself, but he never intrudes when you're trying to calm down unless you're on the verge of doing something dangerous

Tries to keep overwhelming stimuli out of the lair when you're visiting

Yes, that usually can include Leo.

However, the first time you got overstimulated around him did go poorly

He kept asking you what was wrong, pretty much making you want not want to talk about it

At one point it got too much for the both of you (He started getting pushy, irritating you more and making him also start to become irritated) and you just went home to cool off

It took you the entire day to calm down

Once you did, you felt horrible and apologized to him, explaining you tend to get overstimulated really badly around noises and crowds

And asking questions or touching you makes it worse, because being overstimulated makes you easily agitated

He understands and you two talk about what irritates you during these times

He makes sure no-one else bothers you, so that you can calm down quicker

After you've calmed down, please spend time with him, despite the fact that he understands why you need to be left alone, he still feels distressed when you snap at him or can't stand being around anyone.

Leo:

Is the worst in terms of a reaction

He has separation anxiety, so when you leave for hours to calm down and relax, he gets whiny

Often texting you and BEGGING you to let him come in, he swears he won't do anything!

You learned that is a lie the hard way

You relented once, he came in and cuddled you, kissing your cheek softly, making your skin feel like it's getting pricked by needles

You didn't say anything that time, not wanting to hurt his feelings, you felt you could tolerate it as long as he didn't talk or ask questions

Despite the fact that he wants to be in your room while you're relaxing, he gets really aggressive if someone else tries to come in

He once yelled at Mikey to get out when Mikey came to ask you if he could borrow something for an art project

Mikey has never left your apartment quicker lmao

The first time you got overstimulated after you met him was a fucking wild ride

It was a giant argument, making you cry from frustration

He kept getting in your space and touching you up until you snapped at him

He instantly starts freaking out, trying to defend himself (from what you may ask? nothing rational, just thinking his crush suddenly hated his guts) and started asking questions, irritating you further until you left

He got into a depressive episode, almost crying because he thought you hated him, he pretty much was a bit of a simp since day one, so this was a blow to his false confidence

Once you calm down and talk to him, apologizing for your behavior, he calms down as well, understanding that you couldn't help it and that you didn't hate him.

He reacts a lot better now, but please give him attention when you're feeling better, because if he's the cause of your Overstimulation, he'll definitely be in a depressive episode until you are okay with him being around you again.

Donnie:

2nd best reaction out of all four.

ONLY second best because unlike Raph, he will snap back if in a sour mood or if he's overstimulated as well.

If asked, he will leave you alone, only texting you every few hours to see if you're okay

As I've mentioned, he also gets overstimulated, and will ask you if you can leave him alone for a few hours so he can relax.

Also gets aggressive if anyone tries to visit you

Especially Leo, because he's aware that Leo can overstimulate you more than most people can

First time you got overstimulated, he most likely realizes the signs early and backs off

Once you leave, he might wait a few hours before sending you a text

Donnie: Hey (Y/N), you okay? you were pretty irritable when you were here

He won't force you to talk about it, but he is there if you need to talk.

If for any reason, you can't leave while overstimulated, he'll take you into his lab, putting headphones and a weighted blanket on you for your comfort

After either of you calm down from being overstimulated, you two tend to seek each other out, usually to talk about what happened so perhaps you can avoid triggering each other.

Mikey:

Has the 2nd worst reaction

Only because he doesn't get extremely depressed like Leo when you go to cool off, but he's just as clingy

Doesn't like it when others come to bother you but isn't nearly as aggressive as the others.

The first time you got overstimulated around him, he got panicky and started asking you questions, causing you to become irritated

He starts crying a little once you snap at him and it hits you like a truck

You calm down enough to tell him that you just need time alone, which he tries to deny, not understanding why you want to leave him, but eventually he relents and lets you go home

Once you calm down you call him and tell him to come over

It takes him about 20 minutes to come but once he does, he instantly hugs you and apologizes over and over, for what you may ask? he doesn't know, all he knows is that he made you angry.

You tell him he didn't do anything wrong and sit him down to talk about it

He understands once you explain why you got so irritated by his response to you being overstimulated

He does still spend time with you, even when you're in your room trying to calm down

He doesn't interact with you, all he does is draw while on the floor.

When you calm down, please cuddle him, he'll feel so much better.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Made this at 1 am, sorry if it's ass lmao, me sleepy.

[heartilyrins]

Hi! It's the anon that asked if she can drop Robin headcanons!

Sorry I didn't write them on ur previous blog, I was busy with exams. Then when I got free, ur blog went missing :(

So glad to have you back! Will you be playing hoyo's new game, ZZZ?

Also here's the headcanons i promised lol (unfortunately I forgot some of them)

*despite there being no difference in-game, i feel like some of Robin's habits will depend on both their and the PC's gender. For example; growing up, male!Robin and male!PC took showers together because they were afraid of Bailey walking in on them when one of them was alone (yeah I know Vrel confirmed that Bailey took care of the orphans till they got to a certain age but I hate that balding old prick too much to give him any sort of credit). Now that they both are older and need to secure that bag to prevent their asses from being sold off to whoever is feeling particularly freaky on a Saturday, they can't do that anymore. And that makes poor Robin feel lonely😔. He just wants to splash in the bathtub again for old times sake and totally doesn't want to oogle the pc while he relaxes, hair all wet and nice, is it really too much to ask for? (Yes Robin, It's too much to ask for. The PC needs to collect a shit ton of money from sources more reliable than a lemonade stand) so you can't really blame him for masturbating in the shower while fantasizing about PC walking in on him taking a normal shower and asking if he can join and maybe even fuck in there :(

In a scenario where Robin and PC are of opposite gender, they stopped taking showers way early compared to if Robin and PC had the same gender. While both Male!Robin and Female!Robin give (opposite gender)!PC personal space, they can't help but be curious, it's only natural after, I mean you guys have known each other since childhood right? So there's no harm in peeking at PC during the night when he/she is pleasuring herself/himself with his/her door cracked open just a tiny bit. Robin is not being a pervert! He/she is just protecting the PC by standing near there door and peeking every now and then <3

Ah but of course, all that is thrown out of the window if PC is actually related to them. Canonically If you don't romance Robin then you have a close friendship, one that is almost like having a sibling

Now in the messed up world of DOL, a place where you can literally grow cat ears by drinking milk and have to constantly worry about someone with a British accent jumping you for no reason at all other than the fact that they were horny and wanted to make it your problem, I present to you; Robin falling for their actual sibling.

Now at Low!Confidence, regardless of the PC's feelings, Robin would still not be pushy (though they will be a lot more touchy-feely and clingy) and keep their feelings to themselves.

High Confidence! Robin though?

Oh? PC is taking a shower? *joins in* hehe, why are you flustered? Nothing wrong with brothers/sisters/brother and sister/siblings taking a shower together :) here, let Robin help you apply some soap :))) no their hand did not touch the PC'S ass, it was the soap trickling down their back ;)

Also a person hill I would die on; while High Confidence!Robin would wake PC up for sex, LC!Robin sticks to taking care of themselves. If PC is a light sleeper then they masterbait while looking at PC'S face, secretly hoping (but also dreading) at they wake up. On the other hand, if PC is a heavy sleeper then male!Robin will sneakily try to please himself using PC'S thighs or rub against their ass. He's not brave enough to finish there though, so he sneaks off to the bathroom or his room to cum while thinking about PC. Fem!Robin is slightly more depraved and only stops after she finishes, but post-nut clarity hits her harder and he feels extremely guilty. Though, it all slowly goes away. After all, what PC doesn't know can't hurt them right :)

Hrrrrggggg, sorry if they weren't that good. English is not my first language and i haven't played the game in a while (though I'm slowly getting back)

Also if you ever do an anon list can i be ~🩵 anon?

Hope you had a nice day/evening!

OHHH PLEASEE 🥺🥺 I js realised I have NEVER wrote about dol until now and this thought makes me drool, sorry this took so long to reply.. This was like MONTHS ago.. ofc you can be 🩵 anon !!

Side note: since I only write for male characters and female readers, I will only be using Male!Robin and Female!PC ^^

// noncon, somno, drugs, incest

Anyways to continue the thought, I feel like Robin would have that one certain journey to get to where he will be—a depraved horny boy desperate to have sex with his leetle sis!!

It would start with certain touches as you said.. you both often have showers together! And as you grew up.. it was normal to have your brother have his hands all over you to spread the soap, wash your body and even your private spot ><

You’ve became used to showering with him, so it doesn’t even appear to you that he’s started getting touchy with you during showers.. One thing leads to another and then he starts to touch you out of showers too! Just.. close contact for now, he doesn’t want to make you so nervous.

Eventually he’ll get tired of just ‘touches’ and jerking off in front of your unconscious face. He starts to use drugs so he can use you while you’re asleep.. From then, there’s two ways this could go; either you got used to the drugs and wake up during it or he stops using drugs because he wants you awake!

But there’s no stopping with either options you have, he’ll try to reassure you that it’s all okay and that it’s normal while he’s tearing your cunt apart.. it’s up to you to believe it, because he won’t stop either way ><

copr. heartlyrins

[xx-narcissa]

just finished ‘kevin can f**k himself’

well i finished it a few days ago but i had to really let it marinate in my head.

overall, 7/10. i would recommend it if you like drama series or whatever. honestly idk what to compare it to because i think the show is very unique in the directing style but if anybody knows a show or movie similar to it then please let me know and hopefully i’ll be able to check it out.

more detailed review + spoilers below

okay so first impressions i really did not expect the rest of the show to go the way that it did but it was very interesting, although i will say the ending seemed rushed but im assuming that was due to the network and not necessarily the shows team.

i had a love hate relationship with allison. and by that i mean every time i started to like her she did something to make me hate her again😭 definitely i tried to be sympathetic of her situation and how it may make her act but she was still annoying at times and definitely if it weren’t for patty she would have gotten herself into a lot of trouble.

also i want to make sure i mention the directing style (if that’s what it’s called). the transitions from sitcom to drama were so great and honestly chilling. and it’s so fitting for how real life is. obviously not exactly but we all know at least one person where it’s like whenever they’re around they become the main character of some strange sitcom that’s all about them and the problems they make and how everyone else has to clean up behind them and their mistakes. if you don’t know anybody like this then i envy you because these people are draining 😭

but back to the actual contents of the show, patty definitely was my favorite character even from the very beginning. i also began to like neil in the latter half of the second season, where he finally began to realize kevin is not a true friend and wouldn’t care if he lives or dies. i think if the writers/producers had even just a little more time then they could have fleshed out that plot line even more, especially throwing peter into it as well and showing how everyone was slowly distancing themselves from kevin rather than just walking out and ghosting him, as we saw through allison’s struggles it’s not that easy whether you are a spouse, family, friend, partner, whatever.

i liked tammy and i liked her relationship with patty, trust i’ll almost always like a wlw relationship (as long as it’s not immoral in any way). however she was the same as allison in my eyes, where i have that love hate relationship with her. i appreciated that she cared for patty and made patty feel heard but i felt like tammy overstepped her boundaries way too often, just showing up and trying to push patty out of her comfort zone all the time. it’s healthy to encourage people to face their fears and whatnot but i think she just came off as pushy or possessive at times, especially when it came to allison. i understand she viewed allison as a bad influence but i don’t get why she felt so entitled to ‘protect’ patty. patty is a grown woman who has known allison for 15 years, so it was just crazy to me that tammy felt like she could come in and tell allison to stay away from patty as if she would understand their dynamic at all. and yes ik that patty and allison weren’t friends those 15 years but im still just trying to make the point that tammy was the outsider (and a fucking cop so did she really expect patty and allison to tell her every single thing all the time) so she really had no place acting that way in my opinion. she was also very rude with the whole “i don’t like you you’re not my friend” attitude. like no need to lie and sugarcoat it but you can at least fake it till you make it.

anyways enough about that i just felt a bit strongly about that point, mainly bc wlw representation is so hard to come by so i just get a bit upset when it doesn’t work well.

honestly idk why but i expected patty and allison to get together. i’m glad they didn’t though, i think they work better as friends. but also i couldn’t really understand allison’s motives at times. sometimes it felt like she was being purely selfish and treating everything like a transaction (not just with patty but with sam, diane, neil, and even kevin at times) but other times it seemed like she genuinely cared and wanted to help (mostly with patty but a little with diane and sam too). it was easy to tell that patty was genuine with allison and actually cared for her but i just could never tell if it was reciprocated so if anybody wants to give their two cents on that i’m all ears.

i wont even get into sam because i’ll get mad. all i’ll really say is i did not like his dynamic with allison at all. this is again where i could never tell if she was just selfish or actually cared about him (but with him im leaning more towards just being selfish). especially when he brought up that everything that they do it’s because she wants to. so yknow it’s whatever but i didn’t like it and this relationship contributed a lot to my dislike of allison as a main character.

i wont really get into pete or kevin either. pete is pretty one dimensional the whole time (in my opinion). and kevin was very one dimensional until we are able to see more into his destructive and manipulative side in season two, but even then there’s not much to work with until the very end (but like i said the ending needed more work so im trying not to touch on the subject too much).

i liked diane. i was confused at first bc i didn’t know that she was allison’s aunt so their relationship confused me. in the second season i definitely felt for her. the whole thing with neil caught me off guard but i guess they were both hurting or whatever. she was a fine character, not too remarkable but i didn’t hate her.

so overall, my main criticism would be the characters need work. not that they are ‘bad’ or poorly written or anything, i just don’t see any of them as necessarily relatable or likable except for patty (but that’s my opinion and you may have a different one!). and ofc i know that not every story needs to have relatable and likable characters but i think that it helps you hook and maintain an audience.

but i think that that issue definitely is squashed by the great story and direction. idk the circumstances of the show, if it was always meant to be two seasons or if they got cut short idk. if they made a third season i honestly don’t know what else they could have had happen so while i think the ending could have been fleshed out more, i don’t think there was a need for another 8 episodes. THAT BEING SAID, i did love what we were given. as mentioned earlier i loved the contrast between sitcom and drama where not only did the show change cinematically but also the characters in the scene changed the way they acted depending on if kevin was present and i think that that was super interesting and a very unique concept that i personally have never seen before. the plot line could use a couple tweaks here and there but i am no show runner or script writer so please take that sentiment with a grain of salt.

okay, this review is long enough. bye now drink water be safe and ladies carry pepper spray and maybe learn a self defense move or two 🫡

[dwobbitfromtheshire]

A/N: Yes, this one is from my drafts again. I'm trying to clear it out. Delete stuff, finish uncompleted stuff. . .ya know. This is because I think Steve deserves to be wooed. I also think Chrissy and Eddie have a weird, sexual thing with food. It's a bit long.

After spring break, Eddie and Chrissy were quick to get together. She had really tried to wait after she dumped Jason's insane ass, a period of time spme people thought he didn't deserve. It was really more for her, though. The next time she had seen Eddie, however, she recalled his concert he dedicated to her in the Upside Down, and her heart fluttered. He was talking to Wayne on the porch when they saw her walk up from her car. Wayne smiled in greeting and went to head inside.

"Uncle Wayne! I wasn't finished with my story!" Eddie exclaimed.

"The young lady has a look on her face that says she wants to kiss you," Wayne said. "Though I'm happy for you, I don't want to see it."

"What? No, she doesn't! - mmh!" Eddie was cut off by Chrissy's lips.

She pulled back and bit her lip. Shit, should she have asked first? Yeah, she should have. Bad Chrissy.

"I needed to borrow your lips for a moment," she said.

"You can borrow my lips anytime, Chrissy Cunningham," Eddie smirked. "Can I borrow yours?"

She giggled and leaned in to kiss him again. It wasn't long after they started dating that they started to hang out with Robin and Steve. They were so easy to hang out with and have fun with, especially with everything they had gone through together. Chrissy and Eddie found it really enjoyable to hang out with Steve. Chrissy was curled up on the couch with Eddie, across from the other two as they laughed.

"I still can't believe she thought you two were together," Chrissy giggled.

"Yeah, from the moment I laid eyes on the both of you, I knew that you guys were strictly platonic," Eddie said.

"That doesn't mean shit, Eddie! You thought that there was still something between Nancy and Steve!" Chrissy laughed, causing the other two to laugh with her.

"You're lucky you are so cute, Cunningham, I might have thrown you right into Steve’s pool," Eddie said.

"Yeah. It's not because you know that I could kick your ass," Chrissy replied.

"Oh, please," he scoffed. "I could totally take you."

"Like the way I took you last night?" Chrissy asked coyly, and Eddie blushed.

Steve coughed loudly, knowing their talk was about to get filthy. He blushed.

"No, what's ridiculous is how she tried to set me up with Robin when I was clearly flirting with her," Steve said. "I mean, I stopped when she did that because I didn't want to come off as pushy or desperate. I did tell her that I was flirting with her, and she actually didn't know. She laughed, and then she said she hated jocks."

"Oh, damn. That sucks," Eddie said, wincing.

"Well, what she said was that she hated meat head jocks. She didn't exactly say I was one of them, but it was clearly inplied," he sighed, and Robin scowled, opening her mouth to say something.

"Oh, fuck her," Chrissy spat. "And not in a good way. Fuck her straight to hell."

Eddie laughed and kissed her harshly.

"I love your mouth," he laughed.

"I love yours more, especially when you're using it to - ," Chrissy was cut off.

"Woah! Hey! Innocent ears here!" Robin said, pointing at herself.

"Not so innocent if you thought that's what I was going to say," Chrissy said with a smirk. "I was going to say that I love it when he uses it to read aloud."

Eddie's face was red as he buried his head into her shoulder while everyone laughed. Judging by the way he was shaking, Eddie was laughing, too. It always surprised everyone whenever Chrissy was so filthy minded.

"I'm changing the fucking topic. We're doing a casual hangout thing at my house next Saturday if anyone wants to come," Eddie said.

"No can do, I have my own thing on Saturday, and I will not say anymore," Robin said.

"Well, Steve, you're more than welcome to come," Eddie said. "We're having a picnic."

"Are you sure?" Steve asked.

"Of course, we always want you around," Chrissy said sweetly, and Steve blushed.

Saturday quickly rolled around, and Steve showed up to find them waiting for him at the picnic table outside of the Munsons' new house. It was sort of hot out today, so Steve had decided to wear shorts and a tank top. Chrissy and Eddie's eyes raked over him, neither one of the realizing that they were both checking him out. It wasn't until the middle of the lunch that they both realized they had feelings for the man.

They listened as they let him go on for a while, watching as his eyes lit up when he started talking about the kids and the way he talked about Robin. His eyes turned downcast when he mentioned his parents weren't coming home for his birthday, but he smiled when Eddie and Chrissy took his hands in theirs. He let go when he went back to eating. He peeled the banana and started popping pieces into his mouth. They watched in awe as he stuffed his mouth full, his cheeks filling out like a chipmunk. It was so endearing. They must have been staring intently because Steve started blushing and looked at them awkwardly.

"Um. . .hi?" He asked.

"Hi," They said breathlessly.

Steve looked at them as he slowly swallowed and licked his lips. Chrissy bit her lip as she followed his tongue with her eyes while Eddie hid his face in Chrissy's hair.

"Are you guys okay?" Steve asked.

"Oh, yeah!" They both said rather quickly.

Shortly after that, Steve left, and the young couple went inside to enjoy the cool air. Eddie groaned and face planted into his bed.

"Don't get mad at me, please, but Steve is ridiculously good looking," Eddie said, his voice muffled.

"It is completely ridiculous," Chrissy agreed before plopping down next to him, choosing to lay on her back.

"You think he's hot too?" Eddie asked, moving to support himself on his elbows.

"Yes, it would be easier if he had an ugly personality, but he's just so . . . ," Chrissy said, trailing.

"So fucking sweet and amazing?" Eddie asked and she nodded. "Wait, are we crushing on the same guy?"

"I think so," Chrissy giggled as she watched him flop onto his back like he was a fish.

"It sucks that he can't find someone out there who wants him as much as we do," Eddie said with sigh.

Chrissy sat up quickly and straddled her boyfriend.

"Eddie! That's it!" She exclaimed, slapping his chest. "If he's willing. . .maybe we can all be together."

"All three of us?" Eddie asked.

"I've got room in my heart for the both of you," Chrissy replied. "What about you?"

"I mean, yeah," Eddie said. "We don't know if he's into guys."

"Do you think he's worth the risk?" Chrissy asked.

"Oh, yeah," Eddie grinned as he flipped Chrissy onto her back and kissed her.

When Steve’s birthday came around, they made sure he was working when they went over to his house. Eddie knew exactly where the spare key was and used it to let themselves in.

"Aww, I wanted to shimmy up the drainpipe," Chrissy said, and Eddie couldn't help but kiss her pouty lips.

They were both wearing purple, a color Steve had commented once that they both looked good in it. Eddie was in a new button-up shirt paired with his best black pants, and he had actually followed Steve’s instructions for how to take care of his hair. Eddie hated to admit it, but his curls actually looked pretty good. Meanwhile, Chrissy was wearing a simple, sleeveless dress with her hair curled around her shoulders. They began to make Steve’s favorite dinner, and when they heard him walk through the door, Chrissy hurried to put on his favorite song: Heaven by Bryan Adams. Steve appeared in the doorway, looking flummoxed.

"I thought I said that I didn't want to make a big deal out of my birthday," Steve said.

"You said you didn't want a big party," Eddie said.

"It's just the three of us," Chrissy said.

"We can make it if we try, just the three of us," Eddie sang, and Chrissy giggled.

"Anway, supper is almost done. There are clothes on your bed. I picked out your favorite yellow button-up," Chrissy said.

"And I picked out the pants that make your tuches pop!" Eddie said. "I didn't think that it could get more popping."

"You guys are dressing me now?" Steve asked, smiling. "And apparently fond of my tuches, whatever that is."

"It's your rear, dear," Chrissy grinned and softened her smile. "You don't have to wear the clothes. We just want to show how special we think you are. Tonight is all about you."

"Don't have to twist my arm, I was always going to wear them," he said, looking at them fondly.

When he came downstairs, dinner was on the table, and candles were lit, the lights lowered to give it a romantic setting. Steve furrowed his eyebrows, but he sat down anyway and dug in.

"This is really good. Thank you for this," Steve said.

"It's never a problem when it's for you, Stevie," Eddie said, batting his eyelashes at him, and Steve blushed, smiling down at his food.

"So, how was your day?" Chrissy asked.

"Well, it sucked but it's looking up," Steve said.

"Yeah, how's that?" Chrissy smiled.

"My two, uh, best friends showed up and cooked me dinner for my birthday," Steve said. "It's definitely my favorite birthday ever."

"Just best friends?" Chrissy asked.

"Huh?"

"Are we just best friends, Stevie?" Eddie asked.

"I mean, what else - is this a date?" Steve asked.

"Do you want it to be?" Chrissy asked.

"Do you want it to be?" Steve asked.

"We asked you first, big boy," Eddie laughed.

"And I asked you second," Steve replied.

"Yes, we want it to be a date," Chrissy laughed.

"Oh, thank god!" Steve exclaimed, sighing in relief. "I've been crushing on you two for a while now. I just didn't know how to bring it up . . . I've never been wooed before."

Eddie and Chrissy shared a grin before moving around to the other side of the table before they each threw a leg over his legs, pressing up against him.

"Oh, baby," Eddie said. "We're going to woo the fuck out of you."

"We're going to woo your brains out," Chrissy said.

"Because it's what you deserve," Eddie said.

They leaned in and kissed his cheeks.

"You really know how to make a guy feel special," Steve said.

"It's because you are special, Steve," Chrissy said and paused. "Can we feed you?"

"What?"

"We like to see you eat," Eddie said.

"Um, yeah, it's weird, but I like the idea," Steve blushed.

Chrissy picked up his fork and began feeding him the rest of his dinner. She smiled as she watched his cheeks fill up.

"Imagine how good he looks if his mouth was full of you, Eddie," Chrissy said, and Steve nearly choked on his food. "Swallow, sweetheart."

"Do you only have one thing on your mind, Chrissy?" Steve asked in amusement.

"She gets hornier the more in love she is, and also, the more loved she is," Eddie laughed.

"Being loved and cared for is so sexy," Chrissy said, shrugging her shoulders, not ashamed at all.

"It is," Steve said softly.

Chrissy leaned in and kissed him, nipping at his bottom lip before pulling away. Eddie grinned before moving in for his own kiss. He took the fork from Chrissy and started to make airplane sounds with his mouth.

"No! No, airplanes, trains, or dragons! None of that shit!" Steve laughed.

"Aw, come on, just let one dragon in!" Eddie exclaimed. "You're his treasure, and your mouth is his cave."

Steve laughed but opened his mouth and let him feed him. Once dinner was done, Eddie and Chrissy brought out his favorite cake: red velvet. This time, Steve insisted on feeding them, and he could see why they liked doing it. Once the rest of the cake was put away, Eddie and Chrissy started to clean up the kitchen. Steve had to twist their arms into letting him help. He pointed out that it was his night and he got to choose. It helped when he started blasting Bob Seger and made it fun.

"So," Eddie said, turning to him after they finished. "It's your night, Stevie. What do you want to do next? We rented your favorite movie."

"Actually . . .," Steve said. "Can we take this upstairs?"

"You ready for the both of us, big boy?" Eddie asked.

"Oh, yeah," Steve grinned.

Eddie and Chrissy took his hands as they led him upstairs to his room. They began to undress each other as soon as they walked through the door.

"Before we really begin, you should know that -," Eddie started to say.

"OW!"

" - Chrissy bites."

"Did I hurt you, baby?" Chrissy asked. "You can tell me if I do anything that makes you uncomfortable."

"No, actually, I liked it. It just surprised me," Steve replied.

It was surprisingly easy after that to go from being friends to the three of them being lovers. Steve really had the best partners who and despite all of their differences, they were able to work with them, especially his. His parents always made him feel like a burden, but being with Eddie and Chrissy, he felt like he could truly be himself, no matter how weird he was. He couldn't ask for better romantic partners. Later, when they hung out with Robin, he found himself squished between Eddie and Chrissy while Robin curled up with Vickie. Steve was well and truly happy. Steve had everything he needed: his partners, Robin, the kids. . . .everyone was healing and moving forward. Although they would never be the same again, Steve found that it wasn't necessarily a bad thing, especially when you had love in your life, whether it was romantic or platonic.

[thegeminisage]

star trek update time!! last night we watched tng's "rightful heir" and ds9's "the forsaken."

rightful heir (tng):

they were high when they wrote this one. like worf on whatever he was on to try and make him hallucinate

what's really funny about this one is that we were both just complaining that, even though we both like worf, we found the klingon episodes a little rough/dry. and then what do they do. they have worf hallucinate clone jesus

actually, i was really surprised picard laid into him so hard for being late to work. i know it was a tough-love kind of deal bc toughness "speaks" to worf or whatever and it was supposed to seem "nice" because he let worf go on a little field trip afterward but also like. who yells.

i did like that they referenced the klingon prison camp episode. girl i'd still be feeling that one too

clone jesus as a plot is really insane. like, it's already insane that everybody bought into it and GOWRAN of all people was the one to be like "you chumps are getting snowed." but then he's just a CLONE? they grew jesus in a vat somewhere? in a little test tube? and then they crowned him emperor??

no, scratch that, worf threatened to KILL people if they DIDN'T crown him emperor even though he was just going to be a figurehead because this is somehow supposed to fix the amoral klingons who have fallen into decadence. horrific.

side note. s6 has had a LOT of single-character episodes. we had some picard centric eps some worf centric eps a deanna centric ep and a beverly centric ep...when do we get the fucking gang back together? i feel like i never see them all at once anymore. like don't get me wrong i loved beverly's little romp and i feel like this way allows slightly more of the character work i have been craving but the format change is so weird. can we not have a little character work without singling out one character at a time? pretty please?

the forsaken (ds9):

i am sighing the deepest longest sigh i have ever sighed. my mixed feelings...

ok, to start with, i hate when tng characters show up in ds9. it's like they bring the bad vibes with them. BUT this is the least i've ever hated lwaxana.

i think the version of lwaxana as presented IN THIS EPISODE ONLY is very nearly a likable character. unfortunately, i have context for her

the flirting has actually grown on me. like, when she's doing it harmlessly. y'all know isabela from da2? like that. what i have a problem with is her being so touchy-feely - leaning into peoples space or trying to snuggle up with them or take them by the arm. the flirting IN AND OF ITSELF is actually kind of cute/sweet if you divorce it from the context of a horrifically overbearing mother and a woman who is narcissistic and can't take no for an answer. "i can swim" like ok girl i admit you have game. i just wish she would do less TOUCHING.

ok, on to odo, the real star of this episode. odo my new best friend odo

i actually think trapping him in an elevator to force him to turn into goop in front of someone else is a VERY clever premise. and at first i really wished it hadn't been with lwaxana but the more i thought about it the more i realized no one else on ds9 would do. in order for it to work it would have to be both someone who is a little pushy/loud/not totally respectful of his private nature AND someone who could offer a similar vulnerability ie taking off the wig. anyone who's too tactful/respectful of odo/a grownup in general like sisko, kira, dax, obrien, etc would simply turn around and leave him be. anyone who's NOT respectful or a grownup in general (i'm thinking specifically of quark, but julian could probably also work for this) doesn't have a metaphorical wig to take off. like, it would have been great ship material for him to be in there with quark or kira (i know about odo/kira bc i got spoiled, i am a little skeptical but VERY intrigued), but neither of them would have had the same vibe. so i am forced to conclude against my will that lwaxana was the right choice after all.

unfortunately a stranger is also easier to tell crazy shit to...and i looooooved learning crazy shit about odo's past, by which i mean i gasped aloud and covered my mouth with both hands in horror. HE SPENT HIS CHILDHOOD IN A LAB EXCEPT HE DIDN'T EVEN HAVE A CHILDHOOD!!! he doesn't EAT. his mouth is an approximation of one, it doesn't actually work!!! lwaxana, do you know then what else must be a nonfunctional approximation? actually, maybe he doesn't even have any of that going on. maybe he's smooth like a ken doll and that's why he keeps expressing disinterest in sex/romance, or because he has disinterest in sex/romance he never bothered to figure out how to replicate a working set of equipment. anyway the point is i know my king is somewhere on the aro and/or ace spectrum i just have to get to know him better to figure out where

in conclusion, yes it had to be lwaxana, NO i'm not happy about it, but i could have been if she was just less touchy. also, side bar, i don't like that she brought up the ferengi rape episode like it was haha funny. girl it wasn't funny to you at the time and it was definitely not funny to ME

TONGIHT: tng's "second chances" (this one looks good...i'm so hopeful) and ds9's "dramatis personae" (i haven't seen a summary or thumbs for this one but i trust ds9)

[limeade-l3sbian]

Please please please dont judge me.

So prior to discovering radfeminism I thought sex work was cool and all and whatever. My best friend lives in a different country she needed money for rent and stuff and i jokingly said like sell feet pics.

She told me one of her bosses like offered to pay for groceries and internet bills and like ever since then he started getting pushy with her and like asking to come inside and I got like this fucking pit in my stomach. I told her id wire her any amount of money she needed (i was broke as hell but i just had to do smth).

And like when i used to say I'm pro sex work i genuinely meant it like i just meant women are free to use their bodies however they please and if they got money from it who cares but then like my best friend thinking of sleeping with him even if she didnt want to as a last resort to not be homeless made me realize that if sex work was empowering and feminist it wouldn't be seen as a last resort thing like elon musk, bozos Zuckerberg and the likes would dominate the sex industry.

So i just felt so guilty for having that mindset but i was just so confused because every woman around me was like yeah sex work is great and empowering and you can get 10k in a month just by having sex etc. So I just felt guilty bc I had negative opinions about sex work.

It's only after I discovered rad feminism that I allowed myself to hate the sex industry.

I don't think it's worth the energy of feeling bad for having thought that. One, because you aren't immune to propaganda. But secondly, like most people who shout pro-sex work, you were coming from a genuinely good place. I think you have a leg up on a lot of people who do support it because when you saw a real-life situation of what that usually means and didn't encourage your friend or brush off her clearly coerced experience as "just one story."

I personally take umbrage with the people who dangerously decide to only listen to the "fun" stories instead of the women who tell them, "Hey, this really affected me in a way that I am still working through." Then, yeah, I judge and I think you're a piece of shit.

You just want women's liberation. Like the rest of us do.

[shawtythatluvsurgut]

(If you’re a minor: go finish your english assignment, stop being thirsty, and get off this page.)

Welcome to my blog!

Introduction

I’m a dominant feeder from the United States. I’m a chef and I love to cook! Something that I love even more than cooking is feeding and fattening up feedees. I also love cats, nature, and art. I have an Onlyfans, so subscribe to see some spicy content 😈

Note:

Shitty behavior does NOT and will NOT fly here. That includes (but is not limited to): fatphobia, pedophilic behavior, promotion of violence, threats against myself or others, intimidation tactics, misogyny, lying/manipulating, ignoring the feelings of others, homophobia or any other type of bigotry, or attacking the feelings of others. I also will never share nudes with a soul on here because - let’s be real - a lot of mfs on this hellsite are not great people and I’m not down with that. Don’t bring that bullshit here. Don’t ask me to send you nudes. I will say no.

I will stand up for myself and others who I believe I should defend. If you don’t like that, you’re gonna hate it here so you might as well leave. I only want authentic, genuine, honest, good people following this blog. If that’s not you, don’t waste your time because I will see that and I will leave you on delivered. Don’t be rude or pushy; demanding or demeaning in my dms because that’s a great way to get ✨ blocked ✨

I also will not follow you back if you are a blank blog. No hate because I know some of them are not catfish accounts or scammers, but I still don’t trust blank tumblr blogs.

Okay, now that I’ve gotten that out of the way, here’s what you should know about me:

I’m a FFA and I have been for my entire life (The Santa Clause weight gain scene was my awakening and will forever hold a special place in my heart)

I am a feeder who has a feedee irl

I live in AZ

I’m an athlete and have been my whole life (collegiate level track sprinter)

I am bisexual. I like both men and women, but I lean more towards femininity

cats are the cutest animal on the planet

cats are also every other positive adjective you could use to describe a cat

I love my homies (this definitely includes internet-homies of mine) and I will defend them if I feel it necessary

I’m mad short and I’m mad about it. (Five foot three like are you fucking playing with me?! Give me a few more inches at least!!!)

I’m mad strong and can beat you up

I am an artist. My styles are realism, surrealism, and modern. I paint, draw, and write (though, it’s usually sexual fiction that I have kept to myself)

This blog is KINKY AS FUCK. I have a FAT FETISH. If you don’t like that, then leave because I literally did not ask! Here are things I am NOT into. I draw a hard line at these things:

• I am a dom through and through. Don’t send me asks implying otherwise because that makes me uncomfortable.

• ^^^ NO pet names or possessive language (ie: “my princess” or “my piggy”) (I don’t belong to any of you)

• NO age play

• NO rape/sa/abuse fantasies or you will be BLOCKED

• I want to reiterate: NO FATPHOBIA!!! I WILL COME FOR YOUR THROAT!!!!

• I’m not turned on by burps or farts, and especially not unsolicited nudes so please keep that stuff to yourself

• I’m not mean. I swear. I just know how I should be and deserve to be treated. I don’t tolerate bullshit because I don’t have the patience, nor is it my responsibility to teach anyone the basics of respect. Your lesson if you choose to cross my boundaries will be getting blocked by me, and I will simply continue on with my life.

• NO vore

• Not really into the expansion kink

• NO diaper, loli, or little kinks

• Do NOT message me if you are 40+ (because I’m too young for that)

• NO age play

• NO bossxemployee or teacherxstudent power dynamics

• NO death feedism (I stress this one because I want y’all to at least try to be a bit mindful of what you’re consuming large amounts of. I don’t want y’all dying on me)

I AM into:

• feedism

• feedism-related art/writing

• weight gain denial

• force feeding

• Shibari (bondage)

• femboys

• thicc/fat women and men

• submission (to me hehe)

• WEIGHT GAIN!!!!

• belly kink

If you are curious about whether or not I’m into anything not listed here, feel free to ask.

My social media handles are:

Instagram @feedernico

Tumblr @shawtythatluvsurgut

If you follow/message me on there, the same guidelines apply. Don’t try anything malicious over there because you will get exposed and blocked. Please message me on here before/when you request to follow so that I can accept it. If I change my handles at any time or get a new social media, I will update you guys here.

I use the hashtags #ffa #female feeder #fit female feeder and #it me on posts I make of myself. I also watermark every picture of me because I’m not about to deal with catfishing. I don’t fuck with that shady behavior, or any shady behavior. Don’t try to manipulate me because I can see past it. Don’t lie to me because I can see right through it.

Now that all is said and done…

Have fun and keep eating! 😈 I love and appreciate all of my respectful followers and I hope you all have a beautiful life!