#but I do not have any friends like that;; let alone one that I am willing to show my definitely not ESC RPF to lmao

[sexy-monster-fucker]

I Don’t Love You, I’m Just Passing the Time

Dr. Gregory House x Doctor!Reader

Story Synopsis: Reader is a Doctor alongside House. They have known each other for years, mostly been dancing around being intimate with one another. Even though it is painfully obvious to their close friend, Wilson. After finally allowing their guards to fall, the Reader receives a letter inviting her for her dream position at her dream hospital. She has to make the hard choice of staying or going. angst/smut/nsfw/new relationships/minor fluff/typical hospital talk/situationship/

Part 1/Summary: Reader is woken in the middle of the night on the pretenses that her patient’s mother is distressed over some tests being run. Little does she know, House was the one behind it all.

CW: mentions of STDs, house being house, makeout, house being handsy, drug mention, situationship final boss

a/n: i just started episode one of house md, so apologies in advance if this is written out of character

~~~

"Did you seriously go behind my back and run tests on my patient?"

You folded your arms over your chest as you stormed into his office. Being called in from your bed because your patient's mother was distressed that her child had been brought back for testing that you had not informed them up. Still in your t-shirt, only having time to throw on a pair of jeans that you had laying on the floor. Not exactly the image of professionalism you normally showed. Running off pure adrenaline and rage as you tapped your foot on the linoleum floor.

"Well, good morning to you too, sweetheart," Dr. Gregory House, a fellow colleague of yours, snarked with a smirk. You had known him for years. Working alongside him even through all his questionable antics. Finding a close friendship in him and Dr. James Wilson. Somehow still annoyed when he would do something questionably ethical, even though it did not surprise you anymore.

"House," you chastised with tight lips.

"What if I saved your patient's life?"

"Since when did you care about other people's patients?"

"Touché," his eyebrows bounced as blue eyes darted to the side.

Your eyes lasered into him from across his desk. Waiting for some explanation as to why he felt the need to weasel his way into another one of your cases. Anger swirling around your stomach as the seconds ticked by.

"Your tits look good in that shirt," his eyes trailed down to your chest. Earning him an elongated eyeroll from you. His inability to not comment on your body any chance he got shining through. Cocky attitude gleaming behind his eyes.

"You think I don't know that?"

"You're standing here like you do."

"I'm standing here like I am waiting to hear your excuse," you growled. Jaw clinching as your temples flexed. Boiling under the layers of composure you were keeping.

"You left all your paperwork out. The whiteboard still had writing on it. How could I not tickle my fancy and see what you weren't? You should be thanking me. Kid's got chlamydia. Give her some antibiotics and she'll be fine," House shrugged.

"I ran tests for every STD in the book," you grimaced.

"When you hear hooves, assume horses not zebras, Y/L/N," his tone was teasing as he smiled. And you would be lying if you said that it did not make you want to smile back. House was a complete ass. Full of himself, condescending, and just not the most fun guy to be around. But you had grown fond of him. There was no other man alive who you would let talk to you the way he does, let alone flirt with you so much. And you liked him. The way his hair was disheveled, the way his beard ran softly down his neck, and how his eyes were always looking at you deeply. Denying yourself the reality of any sort of relationship, seeing as he was emotionally unavailable.

But you could still have fun with him.

"You're telling me it came back positive this time?"

"Yes. That's what happens when a real doctor runs tests. Instead of making interns do it," hooded eyes looked up at you.

Your tongue came out to glaze over your teeth. Closing the distance between you as you leaned across the table. Teeth grinding together as you stared into his eyes, "You woke me up to gloat?"

"I didn't wake you up. Remember? The mother was worried," he smirked, clearly admitting the false nature of your page.

"You lied to get me here so you could brag in my face," your brows pushed together as you scanned his face. Watching his eyes stare down the v-neck of your shirt as you leaned forward. Clearly fixated on your exposed breasts.

“You sleep without a bra?”

Your face flushes at the realization. In your rush to leave you had not even taken the time to throw on a bra. Understanding why he was so awestruck by your chest. Having a clear view of every detail.

You straightened your back and cleared your throat. Lips parted in embarrassment. Unable to look in his piercing blue eyes. You could see him snickering out of the corner of your eye. Loving how flustered he had you.

“Why did you want me here?”

“I was worried about your patient, of course. Maybe I just like messing with you. Maybe I just wanted to see you,” House bullshitted you. He was the King at it. Fastest way he knew how to get under people’s skin. But you were all too familiar with his game.

You walked around his desk, causing him to straighten his back and wonder what you were about to do to him. You took your place between his spread legs and the desk. Sitting on the edge directly in front of him. Head tilting to the side as you teased, “Did you really miss me that bad?”

House chuckled, rolling his neck as he thought of a response. Scooting his chair closer so that he could be against your legs. Almost close enough to touch you, head leaned above your lap. You caressed his chin with your pointer finger, prickly facial hair danced along your digit. Causing his eyes to fall shut for a moment. Lingering in your soft touch.

“Look, I get we haven’t been working many cases together. And I know it’s so hard for you to be away from me, but you can’t just pull me out of bed in the middle of the night,” you smiled, voice soft with a hint of joking.

“I’d rather be in bed with you,” House grinned. Earning himself another eye roll from you. You flicked his forehead. His brows furrowed together as an over exaggerated ‘OW’ came from him. You laughed as his hand came up to cup where you had hit him. Lines of his forehead thicker than before.

Now this is as the side of your relationship that had your feelings mixed all around. Yes, he was a womanizer to everyone. Of course he made non-stop remarks about your body and your looks and how you were “acting like a woman.” But this? This was something entirely different. A side of him that was genuine and enamored. His smile not riddled with self gratification and narcissism. Instead it was like he was actually enjoying being around you.

“You know I could sue you,” House smugly started, “It’s a hate crime to attack cripples.”

“Not when they deserve it,” you leaned forward as you spoke, closing the gap between your faces. Feeling your stomach flip when his smile softened as he looked in your eyes. Close enough to be breathing the same air. Both of you fighting to not breathe too loudly. Silence loomed over the room. You swallowed the lump forming as you contorted your jaw with thought.

House pushed himself forward, almost connecting his lips to yours. So close you had to hold your breath. Before he could you spoke, “I’m going home since my sleep was interrupted.”

He exhaled with an awkward smile as he leaned back. Looking away from you, out the small gap in his blinds. Piercing his lips together as he nodded. Nostrils flaring as his mind raced. Teeth clicking together, “Teasing little minx, aren’t you?”

Wide eyes looked back at you again. The corner of your mouth upturned when you saw his flushed face. Eyes wandering down to see the outline of his semi-hard in his jeans. Cheeks heating up at the sight as you blew your breath out in a giggle.

“You are just a horny old man,” you led his gaze back to you with your hand on his chin. His pupils were enlarged as they looked between yours.

Neither of you were willing to admit the tension between you. Writing it off as a mutual understanding of how the other behaved. Even when Wilson would point out every obvious sign of something else. Swearing he had never seen two people as smart as you be so stupid.

Knowing the real reason you never acknowledged it was a mutual fear. Fear of things becoming too real and you both growing attached. His dependence on the pills in his coat pocket. Your tendency to run at the first sign of vulnerability. Somethings do not work well together.

Even thought he knew more about you than anyone else. And the fact you had seen the scar that he refuses to acknowledge most of the time. Or even that you both had stayed over at the other’s apartment more than once. Finding comfort in the other’s presence. Watching him play his piano and closing your eyes to the relaxing melody. Allowing him to teach you some minor lessons when he wanted. Finding yourself shopping for food with his tastes in mind. Calling him when you just needed someone to talk to, even if he sounded annoyed the entire time.

“You’re basically dating,” Wilson had once said to you over lunch.

“Oh, God. Can’t a man and a woman just be friends?”

“No!” he had laughed with his exclamation, “Especially not you two.”

You had sneered at him in response, nose scrunched and eyes narrow. Wilson had put his hands up in a defensive position, “Okay— okay! Then explain why you got that.” He motioned to the red sucker on your tray.

“Because I knew House would… want… it..?” You realized what you were admitting as it left your lips. Cheeks igniting when he grinned at you. You brushed him off. Suppressing any and all thoughts and confusion that conversation brought about.

“It’s because I’m cripple, isn’t it?”

You rolled your neck along with your eyes. Sighing heavily with a laugh. Attention back on House when he grabbed his cane and stood between your legs. Resting the cane against the desk so both his hands could splay across your thighs. Figure towering over you now that he was at his full height.

“Not sure how that’ll go over with the P.C. Mob,” he joked as his nose traced your jawline. Heat from his breath trickling down your throat. You could not help but giggle at the sensation. Stubble tickling your skin as he examined your jugular. Feeling when his mouth would morph into a smile. One of your hands meeting his on your thigh, the other tangling in his hair.

“Greg…” your voice dropped to a sultry tone, stopping him in his tracks. Audibly swallowing as he held still. Shoulders rising and falling with each breath he took. Use of his first name was something you normally saved for when you were at home. Still interchanging it with his sir-name from time to time.

“Y/N…” he replied, lips painfully close to your skin. Your heartbeat thumped against your eardrums. Arousal pooling between your legs at the smell of his cologne. And how his fingers dug into your thighs. Stabilizing himself, but also just wanting to feel you.

“I have to go get some sleep,” you drawled, your hand running up his arm and resting on his shoulder. House hummed in response, lips finally resting against your skin with a soft kiss. Chills ran over your body. His lips grew more sloppy as your lip began to quiver. Teeth grazing the flesh as one of his hands ran up your torso. Groping at your chest. Kneading the plump meat of your breast in his large hand.

“Just sleep here,” House groaned into your neck, a hint of a whine in his tone. Lips turning greedy as they made their way to the base of your ear.

“I’m not a booty call you can make when you’re needing to get laid in the middle of the night,” you laughed. Hands coming up and cupping his face. Causing his eyes to meet yours again.

“Really? I thought you were one of the hookers,” House smirked, tilting his head with his words. Leaning back to see your face better. His teeth pulling his lip between them. Swiftly kissing your face to the corner of your mouth. Waiting for some sort of permission before planting them on yours. Big, ocean eyes looked into yours.

You turned to meet him. Lips interlocking. Electricity shot through your nervous system. His tongue split your lips as he lapped into your mouth. Groaning as he pressed his body into yours. Loving the way your legs instinctively welcomed him between them, how they softly wrapped around his waist. Stumbling back against the desk when his weight sunk against you. Arms wrapping around his neck to stabilize yourself. Eyes wide, looking into his. His breath came out shaky, “Fuck.”

His hand cupped the side of your face, lips finding their place on yours again. Open mouth kisses were shared between you for a moment. His hand hooked around the band of your shirt, pushing it up and revealing your bare breasts. Gawking at them before capturing one of your hardened nipples between his lips. You moaned at how perfectly he stimulated your body. Nails digging into his shoulders as you savored his mouth on your skin. Teeth bit marks into the tender flesh, sucking and licking the bruises after.

"I want to fuck you so bad right now," House breathed out, hands roaming your body as his lips placed themself back on yours. You giggled, kissing him back hard.

A sudden yawn escaped your mouth. The lack of sleep catching up with you all at once. You rested your head against his shoulder, eyes growing heavy. Fighting your urge to give into him. House harshly sighed, his hand petting your hair for a moment. Frustrated that your body was throwing a wrench in his plan. "You're seriously that tired?"

You nodded, blinking yourself awake, "I have to be in at six in the morning."

"That's just a few hours away. Can't we have a little fun? I'm sure your blood pumping will wake you up," House suggested. Grimacing when you doed your eyes up at him. Your need for sleep apparent by the way you blinked slowly.

"I can't come to work without a bra," you joked a soft laugh falling from you. House chuckled in response. Lips falling against the top of your head, trying his hardest to not get angry. And trying to ignore how his cock throbbed between his legs.

“I really want to stay, but I won’t be able to work tomorrow if I do,” you whined, sitting up and looking at him with hooded eyes. Sleepily pressing your lips to his again. Matured hand cupping your cheek, thumb rubbing circles into the warm skin.

“Go home, get some sleep. I’ll see you tomorrow,” House sighed, defeated by how sweetly sleepy you were. Sitting back in his chair once more, giving you the space to get off his desk.

You hopped off, planting one more tender kiss to his lips before heading for the door.

“Your ass looks good in those jeans, too,” House said as soon as you reached the door. Smiling when you gave him an annoyed glance over your shoulder.

~~~

[END//Part 1] -> Part 2

// Thank you so much for reading!! This is my first time writing for Dr. House, he is my current new obsession. I’ve got most of this story scripted out and I’m excited to continue it. If you are interested in being tagged in the future, or have a request of any kind, let me know! Comments and Reblogs are appreciated //

{tags}

@megangovier ~ @iwmflbb ~ @houseslollipop ~ @ooom4rie ~ @yourgirlcarol ~

[lolitastories]

Headaches

Rafe Cameron

It was normal right? To have your boyfriend be so close with your family that he seems to fit in better than you ever had. “I told her she should stop seeing that guy” With my elbows leaned against the counter and my face planted in my palms I tried to ignore the men on the couch.

“The only reason she allows him into her life is to piss us off. I mean he is a nice guy but how many times did she reject him before she gave him a chance?”  I couldn’t take it anymore. I pushed my chair back, slamming my hand on the counter. I walk around the couch trying to make my way towards the kitchen, “Where are you going?” I stop.

“Kitchen.” I blankly say turning my body to face them. Like two best friends they are sharing drinks. By their stash it is evident that they are drunk.

“She is only leaving because we are talking about her boyfriend,” I opened my mouth to make him retract his comment because he was pointing over at me like I wasn’t here.

“She never overreacts like that with you”

“Dad!” I say a little louder. His laughter fills the room as he jokingly teases the man I am about to kill. My father and I had a special bond. Now that I was older he was more of a friend than a parent, and I loved that.

“He’s a maniac” Yes, I am about to kill him. “You know what he did yesterday?” He pushes forward to dispose of his empty bottle and grabs another one.

“Talked on the phone about his problems for hours?” I cross my arms waiting to hear more of this conversation.

“Worse. We were in a restaurant and not so shyly asked her to switch tables,” Omg, these men gossip more than any women I’ve met. “So she goes and asks him to join us,” My father looks over to me, offended.

“You let your boyfriend sit with your other boyfriend?” Maybe the friend thing was too much, he should act like a parent in some things.

“He isn’t my boyfriend, he is a friend.” They both share a look, “And you,” I walk closer taking the bottle from his hand. “You are this close to becoming another friend” His grins. His eyes lazily looked up at me. “Now stop drinking because you don’t have to deal with my drunk dad in the morning,” Not caring to make a mess I slam the bottle on the cup holders a little too harshly.

“Hey!” I heard Rafe say louder trying to get my attention as I walked away. “I would clean up his vomit if need be! HE is good company,” I didn't answer as I walked into the kitchen. I wasn’t pissed, I found it amusing. Rafe and my father would drink together when neither of them had plans. My father would drag him to place soccer while Rafe would show him golf. My mother calls him first when she needs anything moved or fixed and in exchange Rafe gets sent home with food. With my siblings and other family members Rafe is everywhere, he is a friend, a protector, and at times a bank. He thinks I don’t see how he slips a ten to my niece or how he stashes a bit of money in my grandmother's wallet but I do, that's what makes me look past the headaches.

“Are they drunk yet?” My mothers eyes soften seeing my walk in and go straight for the bottle of ibuprofen.

“Yes,” I hear my sibling laugh as they sit on the table helping my mother prepare for dinner. “Talking down on Micheal,”

“Oh so their favorite topic,” I share the same smile nodding towards her. “What happened this time?” Leaning against the kitchen island I tell her.

“We saw Micheal last night. He came over to our table and nicely asked if we wanted to seat with him and I guess he was with some friends,”

“Rafe said he was alone and only asked you,” Looking over confused at my siblings' words, I should've known this affected Rafe more than he was showing.

“He assumes, then again he didn’t mention being with friends but he isn’t the type to go to restaurants alone.” I lean back analyzing my words. “Then again when I asked him to sit with us he did it without a second thought.” He wouldn’t abandon his friend like that, right?

“So,” My mother takes me out of my thoughts. “He is pissed because you let Micheal third wheel your date.”

“He said he didn’t mind.”  I jumped back from the sudden loud noise she made by placing the glass bowl on the island.

“You two are so different,” She sighs as she constantly looks at me. I feel like a 10 year old little girl who was getting reprimanded for doing something bad. “He seems cold on the outside while you seem sweet and approachable but with the twist of things, he shows everyone,” She points around dramatically, “How much he cares for you while you don’t seem to care. You don’t show it unless it's in private and Rafe,” She pauses.

“Rafe what?” What did she know? “Mom,” I push more.

“You are my daughter first so I am going to say it,” She looks over at the entryway and then back at me. “Rafe told me he didn’t want to push you into doing anything but, he sometimes wishes you were more affectionate.” wow. I didn’t know what to say, well I mean I didn’t have to say anything to my mother but I did have to with Rafe. “Honey,” She leans forward, talking quietly. “I know it's not in your nature to show affection but in a relationship when one part of it is working, you need to do your part too.”

“He loves you either way but, just like how he has changed for you, you need to do the same.” My sibling walks over patting my shoulder. Wow. I was left speechless. Since I've met rafe he was always hands on in the relationship. He would ditch his friends to hang out with me. He would go out of his way to bring me whatever I needed. He stopped drinking unless he knew I was okay with it. It's without saying what he does and how much he cares for my family is a lot. He has done it all for me, and what have I done? Nothing. I didn’t take time off to go on a surprise vacation he planned. I don’t give him or our relationship priority because I have felt that our relationship is strong. I should have told Micheal no, it was our date night. I should appreciate him more. Thinking back at the list I made with my middle school friends about the perfect boyfriends, Rafe has exceeded. He was beyond what I could have wished for as a partner.

“Hey,” I don’t turn around. I hear him walking closer, his hands falling gently over my shoulder. “Do you have a washcloth?”

“Did he make a mess?” My mother shakes her head towards what she thinks was my father's antics.

“No,” I knew he was drunk but in front of my mother he was always composed. “I spilled a little beer on your couch,” My mother waved him off as she handed him a washcloth.

“No worries, are you staying for dinner?” We all knew the answer to that

“Of course.” I tilt my head enough to see his face. He has that stupid smile that makes everyone, even people who hate him smile. 

“Okay, I will call you when it's ready.” He nods. Giving my shoulder a squeeze before leaving back to the living room. I look back at my mother and she has that look, See. I hold my hands up in defense.

“I know, I know.” Taking a deep breath I prepared myself before walking into the room again. I walked closer seeing Rafe cleaning up kneeled in front of the couch giving it his all to clean to smudge. I look over to my snoring father, his arms over his stomach as he lays facing the tv. “How many did he have?” I sit against the armrest staring down at Rafe.

“7” I take a glance over at the case of 24. There are at least 10 left.

“You?”

“5” He stands up. “One day I will beat him,” I shake my head with a smile.

“You should just give up now.” He shakes his head coming closer and taking my head in his hands. “Why are you so adamant about outdrinking him?” Ever since he started drinking with my dad, my father always had 2-4 more beers than him.

“To show that I deserve you,” No matter how cute his feelings behind that statement was, he wasn’t thinking straight.

“By drinking and killing your liver.”

“Right-wait no!” His smile becomes a little crooked. “To show him I can be persistent. That I won’t give up on you when he gives me his blessing.”

“Oh, you’re that sure he will give you his blessing?” He nods. “Shouldn’t you care more about my blessing?” His expression was becoming droopy by the second. His body swaying to some tune in his mind.

“You don’t want to marry me?” The even light casting a yellow hue on his face. He leans forward trying to capture my lips but I pull away. I remove myself from the armrest and start pulling him towards my bedroom.

“I like how much you fit well in my life.” He probably won’t remember this, when he drinks he usually doesn’t. “I like how much you think of me.” I turn the door knob and pull him into my room and he follows without hesitation. “I like that you are sweet,” I closed the door quietly and let go of his hands. “And although I like how well you get along with my father,” My fingers find the hem of his shirt. “You don’t need to try to outdrink a man double your age to get his blessing.” He lets me pull off his shirt. “Because if it wasn’t clear to you, he already approves of you.” I turn to flip the covers off and push him to sit on the edge of my bed. No matter how long it's been I still get butterflies when he looks at me. The sweet warmth casting over me as I kneel down to take off his shoes. He watches my every move, as I finish unlacing it to how smoothly he allows me to move him under the covers. I couldn’t help but caress his face as he gets comfortable in my bed.

“Do you?”

“Hmm?” I wait a couple of seconds, he must be half asleep at this point. When he gets drunk and gets to a comfortable surface, he is knocked out.

“Do you approve of me?” He moves closer to my hand as he lays over his cheek.

“I would be stupid not to baby,”

“Cool, let's get married tomorrow.” He was drunk. He wouldn’t remember this tomorrow. But they say kids and drunks don’t lie, so it was okay to think about it.

“Yeah? Got the ring already?” I was surprised to see him nod tirelessly. “When did you buy it?” I push some more

“The day after you agreed to go on a date with me.” That was over a year ago. “I knew you were it for me.”

“When are you planning to propose?”

“On the trip you cancelled,” Shit. I was taken back, he was going to propose just 2 weeks ago.

“Get some rest,” I pull back carefully trying not to disturb him but as I get to open the door he shuffles over and grabs my hand.

“I hope you say yes,” I don’t know how I held back tears. This drunk man on my bed was going to propose to me. I cancelled the trip and he didn’t mention how important it was. I had to make it up to him and nothing small will do. If they expect me to show him how much I care for him, it will have to be big.

“In every lifetime,” He opens his eyes smiling.

[spaceandbones]

Okay heres something fucked up: gojo trying to do necrophilia to geto's body because he's so messed up that geto is dead and he killed him and shoko has to try to pull the sixeyes infinity nuke of a gojo-heir off without getting accidentally murdered

Wow there's something deeply wrong with you want to be friends w me

"To think, you'd be the one here at my end."

My end.

That can't be right, can it?

Satoru doesn't see the end. What he sees is a body on a sterile silver table, partially covered by a crisp white cloth so the gore is neatly hidden away. But he can't grasp seeing the end.

As long as Suguru existed, Satoru could say things to himself like- maybe someday. Eventually. Anything could happen. I could make anything happen. The strongest- both of us, the strongest. I could make anything happen.

He made things happen, alright.

There is a consequence to this action that, deep down, he knows won't hit him until later, because right now he keeps rolling the concept of the end around the flat of his tongue, hoping to come up with some different interpretation of it.

There are a thousand ways to avoid death in this world. But this is bad.

This isn't avoidance. This needs fixing. And he's not- he doesn't know-

"Gojo."

Shoko's voice cuts through the fog in his head, clean as a scalpel-slice. He wants to put her hands to his head and have her push away all the rot. Can you heal this?

He turns to look at her. The end? It can't be.

"Do you need a moment?"

He must say yes, because she turns to leave and he watches her go, but before she can get out she turns at the doorway, one pale, skinny hand gripping the frame of it, and gives Suguru's body a look that conveys everything Satoru can't let himself feel.

Then she's gone, and he's alone with the end.

When she comes back he's going to ask her. They'll find something, even if nobody cares, even if it isn't possible. He's the strongest. He can make anything happen if he wants it bad enough, and he- he wants this- he wants this so-

It doesn't even fucking matter that Suguru was... what Suguru was.

Obviously that matters. It matters. Satoru did what he had to do, there was no getting around it. He didn't even do it, did he? It was- it was already happening. Suguru was-

Satoru, within arm's reach, extends a hand that's shaking so bad it vibrates up his entire arm, and as easy as the reflex to breathe, when he nears Suguru he feels infinity drop. It sluices away like a drop of rainwater, and then he's bare, but it doesn't matter.

He brushes a piece of inkspill-dark hair from Suguru's cheek. He's cold all over. Both of them are.

"I can't say sorry," he whispers, in a voice that sounds like someone else entirely. He doesn't feel any older than seventeen years old. He feels like he's been alive for a thousand years.

And he tries again.

"I can't say I'm sorry. We didn't-"

There is so much that we couldn't understand about each other, and now there is so much we won't ever get the chance to. I'm sorry, and I'm not sorry at all, because neither were you.

All that comes out is a choked sound that isn't a sob. It can't be. Crying is for grief, grief is for death, and death is only real if it's permanent, and he can fix this. He can fix anything.

He's on the table before fully realizing he's doing it. His knees on the edge, and then it's a little more, one over Suguru's covered thigh, his hand braced on Suguru's chest, where he should feel a heart beating but instead he feels nothing at all. His left hand slips over blood that hasn't dried yet. There was so much of it, hours in the infirmary haven't dried it, yet.

A sudden surge of anger rises up inside of him and drowns out the ceaseless ringing in his ears with something more violent. Face wrapped up in a snarl, like it even matters, like they can fight anymore, he grits out- "What the fuck am I supposed to do now?" but it doesn't come out angry, it comes out in a twisted-up, hysterically strained whisper, "You fucking idiot. You Idiot."

The end. It feels pitifully quiet for the end, so maybe that really happened earlier. Not in that alleyway, but earlier than that. When Satoru was so busy letting Suguru pull one over on him that the entire student body almost died. That would have been his fault as much as this is. Everything Suguru ever did from the moment Riko Amanai died was Satoru's fault.

The strongest, and he hasn't been able to protect a single soul, just his own. Suguru did many, many things that Satoru couldn't ever agree with. The ultimate goal of protecting something he cared about was never one of them, though. That, he understood. Understands. He's just not good at it.

He leans closer. Even if there was a way, would it matter? Has it mattered? Has anything in the last decade mattered as much as what happened before it? He isn't sure if there was ever a path forward that didn't look like this, because despite the echoing sentiments shared between their high-school selves in the middle of the night, Suguru was not the strongest in the same way that Satoru is and always will be.

There isn't a reverse scenario where Suguru is the one breathing on this table.

Satoru expects that thought to make this a little easier. It doesn't.

Suguru's mouth is cold in a way the skin of his face wasn't. That felt like porcelain, and this...this is cold like outer space, and the lingering taste of death is all over him. It's not so far off from how he tasted when he was alive.

Satoru stops kissing a dead man long enough to tell him- "I hate you."

There isn't anything gratifying about it. He doesn't care about that. He just won't ever get to do it again. He knows that, even if he's going to spend the rest of his life possessed by the what if? He's seen people come back from what should be death. He came back from what should have been death. But he can't remember being cold like this.

When Shoko comes back, he's kissing Suguru everywhere he can think to kiss him, in case this is actually the end, in case he never gets to do any of it ever again. In case he has to go to sleep every night praying for dreams that feel like they're real. Dreams from somewhere far off, somewhere warmer. The beach, maybe. When everyone was still alive. When Satoru could still trick himself into thinking he could keep everyone alive.

"Gojo," her voice shakes, and her hands on him is such a strange feeling. She's cold, too, but he can feel her pulse thrumming like a little bird beneath the places her fingertips touch down against his arm.

"Gojo- Satoru- please."

She's tugging him off the table, and he has to keep infinity down because Suguru is right here and he's never kept infinity up around Suguru when they're this close, has he? Not since the first few months of knowing each other.

His leg slips off the shine of the steel table, and his foot hits the ground hard. He fists a hand into the sheet over Suguru, because all of his clothes are gone, and he doesn't want to grab at his body too hard. He knows what death does to flesh, and it's- it gets- it gets delicate-

"Satoru, honey- you can't-"

"Just a minute Shoko," he mumbles, fixing the sheet and trying to push himself back up, just so he can be close again, just for a second, just a second, he might not have many more-

"No, Satoru you need to get down now."

He's never heard Shoko so afraid. What does she have to be afraid of?The end is already here.

Her hand tightens around his arm so hard it momentarily stuns him enough that he turns to face her.

Shoko- always stoic, always brave, has tears in her eyes, and she's fighting them back, but she looks- he's never seen her so horrified. He's known her for over a decade, and he's never seen her like this. Is that how he looks, too? Maybe they'll all look this way forever.

"You're scaring me," Shoko admits, in a feathery whisper. She doesn't really sound scared of him. She sounds sad. He's sad, too. He thinks he'll be sad for a very long time.

His hands float up to her face, one of either side, and her eyes flicker dangerously, but she doesn't move away from him.

"You're so warm," he breathes. She is. Her hands were cold, like him and Suguru, but her cheeks are warm, and alive- and God, she's alive, isn't she? She's here. They're both here. All together, again.

How many hours did the three of them spend in rooms together? Slacking off and pretending to study, Suguru and Shoko sharing cigarettes back and forth while Satoru wrinkled his nose and waved away the curl of smoke. Why did he always think they might add to those hours, even after Suguru left?

It was enough. Having him alive was enough. Even horrible, even standing against everything Satoru had ever claimed to be for, it was enough.

He's afraid that nothing will ever be enough again.

[scandistar]

Rolan's Personality Type

So, when responding to @sleketon-or-slekky's post on what Rolan's MBTI would be, I wondered if I should try writing an "essay" on it. Mind you, I have never written a character essay before and I'm not entirely sure how it works, but there is a first time for everything and I thought the topic was interesting enough to share my thoughts on as best as I can. However, I won't make any extreme deep dives as I am not a professional, so I'll keep it pretty basic but still explain my understanding of it. Do take everything I say with a grain of salt.

Before I start, I want to point out that personality typology such as Myers Briggs type indicator, enneagram, astrology and everything else that falls under the term are highly unreliable to use on real people, as every individual is too complex to perfectly fit into one box or another. Personality types are mostly regarded as pseudoscience in psychology, so in my opinion, they shouldn't be applied to anything other than entertainment and fiction.

(I've found most of my information from sources like 16personalities and Truity)

Anyway, let's begin.

MBTI, or Myers Briggs type indicator: The Prodigy

I think a lot of people on the internet have heard of MBTI before, which is a pretty straightforward tool to find your personality among 16 distinct types based on four letters that make up your functions. Introversion or Extroversion, Intuition or Sensing, Thinking or Feeling, and Judging or Perceiving. You're either one or the other of all four of these categories and they explain how you operate as a person. Of course, no one person is strictly a feeler and never thinks logically, and nobody is entirely extroverted and prefers to spend all their time around people. The lines blur somewhere, but the letters are based on how you function the majority of the time.

A lot of us know what Introversion and Extroversion are, but most people don't exactly know what they mean. It's not just about whether or not you like being around people, but when and where you get your energy. Some people prefer to be on their own to recharge, but that doesn't necessarily mean that they dislike people or struggle with being social. Others get their energy from being among friends and family, but that doesn't mean that they refuse to be alone or are unable to recharge in solitude.

As it is with NPCs, we haven't seen enough of Rolan to tell for certain whether he's an extrovert or introvert, but you can get a general idea from your interactions with him. He seems to strive for renown, dreaming of his name being known "far and wide". He wants all eyes on him, and though he could be feigning confidence, I also think it's tightly linked to who he is, as he genuinely seems to value being someone others look up to. He thrives in environments where he gets to show off his skills and he responds well to praise and applause. Those who aspire to be in the spotlight are often rather extroverted people, whether or not it is a coping mechanism. So I'll give him an E (don't worry, babe. I'm not grading you).

Then there is Intuition and Sensing. It means you either utilise concrete thinking as you analyse the world around you (Sensing) or abstract thinking as you regard the "what if"s of a situation rather than the tangible (Intuition).

Rolan is a very concrete and literal person. He's highly focused on the things that are in front of him, and the things that are the most important: The safety of his siblings and his apprenticeship waiting for him in Baldur's gate. He is laser-focused on both, and he's practical enough to act on achieving them by all means. He doesn't stop and let his imagination do the work for him, he's hellbent on continuing forward and learning all that he can. So much so that he didn't think to question if Lorroakan's treatment of him was entirely necessary, as he thought it was the prize he had to pay "to become a true wizard". He saw his abuse as a test and it seemed reasonable to him. He is also very good at taking past experiences into account as a way of learning from them, which is brilliant for his character development. So, I give him an S (because he's S-teir).

Thinking and Feeling are often discussed when it comes to MBTI. If feelers are nothing but illogical crybabies, and thinkers are unfeeling machines. Both are entirely untrue, of course. Some lean more into their feelings than others, while some focus more on the facts, but that doesn't mean that the former can't practice logic and rational thinking and the latter are unempathetic and hold no sentimental values. We're still human (humanoid in Rolan's case).

Rolan comes off as unfeeling the first time you meet him. He wants to leave the grove and the refugees behind to continue onward to Baldur's gate, refusing to stay and help. I've read plenty of great character analysis posts on why that is his stance, and they've all painted a good picture of him as a person and what he has potentially been through as a child when you take his mannerisms into account, which are rather atypical compared to the other tieflings. But I won't get into that, because now we're talking about our feelings! I can say straight off the bat that Rolan is a highly rational person. He does things because they make sense and not necessarily because they feel right. It makes sense to leave the grove because one: They have places to be and he "cannot be late", and two: These people won't make it otherwise. If you and your companions hadn't arrived, he would've been right. Why stay and defend a bunch of strangers that will ultimately die, when you have the chance to bring your family to safety? He doesn't hold anything back either, as he says what he thinks, even if it makes him appear in a less savoury light. But it can also be said that his emotions do fuel the things he says, especially when he lashes out at you in Act 2 after losing Cal and Lia. But like I said, he's a person. So, I give him a strong T (for our Testy grump).

Lastly, we have Judging and Perceiving. Either you're a very organised and schedule-oriented person. You're less open-ended, focus more on efficiency than flexibility and want to have things determined and prepared (Judging). Or, you're a far more spontaneous person who doesn't want to restrict your options. You want to have the opportunity to explore your interests and alternatives freely without being tied to timetables and intricate plans (Perceiving).

I think I've pretty much established that Rolan is single-mindedly focused on getting to Baldur's gate and starting his apprenticeship. Little else can infringe on that plan and whenever he has no choice but to postpone it, he gets noticeably stressed and upset. Speaking to him at the tiefling party, an occasion which is a distraction from the current course of action, he reveals that it wasn't his decision to come, but Cal and Lia's. He's decisive, stubborn as an ass and wants things to go according to his expectations, and when they don't, it tests his patience and puts him ill at ease. With his every plan, he makes it abundantly clear that he will follow through with them no matter what. No matter if it means conquering the shadow curse to save his siblings. No matter if it means being frequently verbally and physically abused to achieve his dream. No matter if he has to rip his newly-acquired tower apart to find a way to help you fight the Absolute. He is stalwart and orderly, which is admirable, but his aversion to any form of help has come with its share of consequences. Thus I'll give our beloved tiefling a J (I don't have a clever joke for that one).

So, that would mean that he falls on Extroversion, Sensing, Thinking and Judging. Or to put it simply: ESTJ.

An ESTJ, also known as the "executive" or "supervisor" (as referred to by 16personalities and Truity respectively), is a hard-working, traditional and dedicated individual who appreciates orderly and methodical approaches to their everyday life. They're assertive and efficient and want structure and control of their physical and social environment, while also being highly resilient and determined. They're grounded and see things for what they are and how they can be improved, often taking inspiration from past problems and solutions, and they're mostly at home in a setting where they're in the lead, therefore shining in roles as managers and directors of both themselves and others. Although they can be unapologetically straightforward and honest, they're incredibly loyal and reliable, staying true to their word and never breaking their promises.

An ESTJ, however, is rigid and unyielding. They can be uptight and have strong convictions in their beliefs of what is right and wrong, making them rather judgemental of those who do not fit their opinion of "right". Due to their extroversion and strong traditionalism, they can put a bit too much importance on status and have incredibly high standards for themselves.

Now, I am aware that it would be better to go into cognitive functions and assess which one of those he aligns with, but that would make this essay twice as long and a lot more convoluted than what I've already made it, but I'm pretty confident in my conclusion either way. I didn't intend to make this a deep dive and I think ESTJ fits him almost to a tee.

I don't know how exactly to conclude this. As I said, I've never done a character essay before and I've always had a hard time trusting my own judgement and opinions on things, but sometimes you have to take a leap of faith.

Anyway, I had fun with this! But if there is anything I missed that is worth mentioning, or if you have any additional thoughts on this, I'd love to hear them! Every perspective of our beloved grumpy tiefling wizard is a welcome one and I am always open to discussion. I wrote this for the Rolan nation, after all!

Thank you for reading! <3

Also, before you go, have a little Rolan dressed as the ESTJ avatar from 16p:

[howdeepthegrave]

Agathario AU where Wanda, Alice, and Lilia learn on a rather drunken Girls' Night that Agatha has not gotten laid in nearly a decade (the last time was four years before she had Nicky.) The crew make it their personal mission to get her into bed with someone within the next six months.

"Or what?" Agatha asks when they tell her. "I'll explode or something?"

"Well, getting laid might take down some of your bitchness a notch or two," Alice says.

"I'm not bitchy. I'm a perfectionist."

"Agatha, you once threatened to flatten a traffic cop for looking at you as you crossed the street."

"ACAB, Alice."

"Hey, I was..."

"You were a cop once, yes, I know. But you left the force, thus reducing your bastardy by at least 0.8%. Anyway, when was the last time any of you got laid?"

"Jen and I went a little wild last weekend," Alice says.

"Vision and I are in counseling, okay?" Wanda grouses.

"Michfest 1982," Lilia says, "but of course Lorna and I were really only friends with benefits by then."

Alice audibly gags.

"You slept with my mom?"

"Alice, dear, your mother and I were in a committed relationship for a decade."

"So, after this evening of exciting revelations," Agatha declares, "I think we can all agree that there are others in this world who need to get laid far more than I do."

A week later Agatha, having acknowledged that she kind of is lonely, having not even gone on a date since Nicky was two, agrees to let Alice set her up on a blind date with someone Alice knew in college. The night arrives, a sitter is procured for Nicky, and Alice's old friend arrives to take Agatha out to dinner.

"Hey, I'm Rio Vidal. You Agatha?"

"I am," Agatha manages.

The person at her door is gorgeous, and she's actually a little afraid she might explode if they even seem inclined to kiss her, let alone take her to bed.

The date goes well: an excellent meal, a lot of good conversation. Rio is a restauranteur, which Agatha finds fascinating.

"Nothing so fancy as this place, though," Rio says. "Just a couple of pizza places. Non-chain."

"Oh, well, Nicky and I do love pizza."

"Nicky. That your little boy? Alice said you have a kid."

"Mm-hmm. My pride and joy."

Rio smiles at that, and Agatha feels her heart almost melt at the sight.

At the end of the night, Rio takes Agatha home and walks her to the door.

"This was good, I think. Can I see you again some time, Agatha?"

"Uh, well, sure. I had a really great time."

She's sort of wondering if maybe Rio will kiss her or something, but all she gets is what she thinks will be simply a handshake...

Until Rio lifts Agatha's hand to her lips and kisses the back of it softly.

"I'll call you, Agatha. Te veo."

They end up going out to a folk music concert in the park the very next weekend. It's fun, and when Agatha is shivering at one point near the end of the evening, Rio offers up her jacket.

"Can't have a beautiful woman like you freezing."

That night, Rio does kiss Agatha good night, and it's a good one. Long and soft and warm and... Well, Agatha has some dreams that night which go way beyond kissing.

Three months in, they're properly dating, as far as Agatha is concerned, and she's very happy about it. Rio is kind, considerate, funny, and very sweet. She almost always brings Agatha flowers, and she goes out of her way on all of their dates to make certain Agatha is comfortable and having the best possible time.

Then, one day, Rio stops answering Agatha's texts and calls. At first she figures things are busy in the restaurant game. She would go ask Alice if anything's up, but Alice's band is touring the west coast for three months and communication on that end has been spotty as well. After a month and a half, Agatha figures maybe Rio got tired of her and decided to ghost her, and she moves on.

Another month after that, it's just a quiet Friday night at home for Agatha and Nicky when there's a knock at the door. When she answers, who should Agatha see but Rio.

"I... I'm sorry I haven't been in touch," she says. "There's been a lot of family stuff. I had to be down in Puerto Rico a while and take care of things, and at first I was too busy to really get back to your texts and stuff, and then I figured you would be pissed I had gone silent and..."

Rio trails off, and Agatha notices that she looks worn down and tired.

"I... I thought you might just be busy or something. Would you like to come in? I was about to make dinner."

"I don't wanna disturb you."

"It's fine. C'mon, you look like you need to sit down for a while."

So Rio comes in, and Agatha introduces her to Nicky.

"This is my friend Rio. Rio, this is Nicky."

And Nicky instantly does that thing a lot of little kids do.

"Hi! Would you like to see my toys?"

Rio looks sort of nervous, but Agatha goes with them and stands in the doorway of Nicky's room while he shows Rio all of his stuff, and right away Rio seems really relaxed. She's acting genuinely interested in everything Nicky says, and she doesn't talk down to him like many adults do with small children. After a while, Nicky goes over to Agatha again.

"Mama, can Rio watch TV with me while you make dinner?"

"If she wants to, sweetheart."

"I like television," Rio shrugs.

So Agatha makes dinner, and when she goes to tell Nicky to wash his hands, she sees that Rio has fallen asleep sitting in the big armchair.

"Rio. Rio, are you hungry?"

"What? I... Oh. Oh, I'm... I'm sorry I fell asleep."

"It's okay. Would you like to have dinner, or do you need to rest a little longer?"

"I'm sorry, I'll go, I..."

"Hush. Here, why don't you stretch out on the sofa?"

Agatha goes and gets a spare pillow and a blanket and gets Rio settled on the sofa. Later on, just after Nicky goes to bed, Agatha is washing the dishes when Rio wanders into the kitchen, the blanket around her shoulders.

"Hungry?" Agatha asks.

"Starving."

Agatha warms up some of the leftovers and Rio sits and eats while Agatha finishes cleaning up.

"You feel better after your nap?"

"Yes," Rio says, "thank you. And again, I'm really sorry..."

"Don't be. You clearly needed it."

After Rio eats, she insists on washing the plate and utensils she used herself, and she starts to say she needs to leave, but Agatha is still worried.

"Stay the night. Just so I know you're not out driving tired in the night."

So Rio spends the night on the couch, and she has breakfast with Agatha and Nicky in the morning, then heads out. She calls Agatha that night and thanks her for being so kind, then asks if maybe they can go on another date in a few weeks.

"I'd like that, but don't rush yourself."

"It's no rush. I know I'll feel better if I can get back to spending time with you."

Their next date is actually taking Nicky to a carnival. Well, Agatha takes Nicky to the carnival, and they run in to Rio, who was about to leave after going there with friends who already left. Instead Rio stays and spends the afternoon with them. Three days later Agatha and Rio have another official date, and when they get back to Agatha's, Rio ends up spending the night in a more romantic way. It is glorious and soft and amazing.

They go on dating for three years before Agatha's friends start bugging her about "reeling in the big fish." Agatha ignores them, because the relationship is what it is, and it's wonderful. She would love for things to progress to perhaps marriage, he's not sure how Rio would feel about that. They've sort of avoided the topic, just because it felt rushy to both of them.

Finally one night, they're doing the dishes together after dinner at Agatha's, and Rio just casually reaches over and places something on the little ring holder that sits on the inner ledge of the kitchen window. Agatha looks and sees this gorgeous ring, a diamond surrounded by little amethysts.

"What's that?" she asks.

"It's yours," Rio says, "if you want it."

"Are you... Proposing?"

"Not if you don't want me to. Do you want me to, Agatha?"

And Agatha realizes she does want it. She's so deep in love with Rio, and Rio is so good to her, so sweet with Nicky. And Rio proposes to her right there at the kitchen sink. When they get married six months later, Alice takes all the credit.

[will-o-wen]

what songs did these two write about each other? I saw you mention Mark (the short one?) wrote some songs about Robbie (monkey?) but I. NEED. NAMES. for science ofc. songs in the band, solo, whatever, all songs, any songs.

signed, these bitches gay anon.

Welcome back, these bitches gay anon.

Mark, the short one, yes, wrote some songs about Robbie the monkey. Let me give you a list. I'll categorise it into three groups: canon, most likely canon and most likely canon (to me). The third one means the same to me as the second and they both mean the same to me as the first because I'm insane and love being right. Terrible habit but what can you do?

(but like full disclaimer, apart from the first two this is puuuure speculation specifically written for this fandom space)

Canon:

Take That - Shine, written by Mark for Robbie during a time where Robbie was dealing with agonising mental health issues. Here's a quote: "Hey, let me know you [...] let me love you, you're all that matters to me". Robbie, the monkey, confirmed that it is about him. Mark, the short one, has still not talked about it once; he's very determined that way.

Robbie Williams - No Regrets, now this one was written by the monkey. It's not exclusively about the short one, it's about the entire band they were in, but a few of the lines were sung back at Robbie by Mark for one of Mark's solo gigs in 2005, during the time they were all separated. The lines go as follows: "Sing me a love song, drop me a line, suppose it's just a point of view but they tell me I'm doing fine. Remember the photographs? Insane. The ones where we all laughed? So lame. We were having the time of our lives, well, thank you. Well, thank you." Later in 2011, when they were all reunited, they sang almost the same lines together on their joint tour.

Most likely canon:

Mark Owen - Alone Without You, is one of Mark's songs released in 2003 for his solo album, they were separated at the time and barely saw each other. It's widely understood to be about Robbie. "The truth is you're not here and I'm screwed up again and I don't know the reason why, I don't know why it is and did I ever say? That I just need your love and I want you back again, I want you back again [...] what am I to say? What am I to do? What am I alone without you?"

Take That - Into The Wild, is a Take That song supposedly written by Mark for Robbie. This came out in 2014, so this was after their big reunion in 2010 and then also after Robbie left the band once again but this time on good terms. And I love this song because it paints a rather... interesting picture of how their reunion went and what it subsequently developed into. "Tied up again, with my one and only friend. Your voice is all I can hear, it's the music to my ears. Staying out of trouble, staying in and out of touch [...] I can never get enough. [...] We go playing with fire, then we go dance with desire, then we go into the wild again.[...] Let me run with you, my friend. Let me be with you, running through the wild again" (must've been a good reunion and must be nice whenever they reunited after that:)))

Most likely canon (to me):

My overall reasoning for assuming these are about Robbie is that thanks to Shine being confirmed, it's almost like we got the key to Mark's personal Robbie monkey code. There is a certain theme that only exists in a few songs, as it does in Shine. (the theme is very specific Robbie yearning a la I miss you, love me, let me love you, why don't you love me, why won't you let me love you)

Mark Owen - Kill With Your Smile, written by the short one in 2003 for the same album that Alone Without You is on. I have no greater explanation apart from the fact that it fits the Robbie vibe and I love the song. "You start me up, anytime. I'm a dog, I'm a slag, I'm a disco queen. You're so on that you make me shine. [...] And I dig your music [...] You just fuck me up every time. [...] Stand out, you're a chemical, come on up, sweet lord you're a miracle."

Mark Owen - Wasting Away, once again written by Mark but this time for his 2005 solo album. This one has a darker tone but the theme is actually quite similar to huge chunks of Shine, but obviously not as filtered because it was not for Take That, just for Mark. (and Robbie the monkey) "Alone, we were inseperable, you lied to me, I didn't see you coming, now I'm on my own, for the words that left your mouth were terminal. Together, we're unsuitable. [...] Murder me, why don't you murder me? [...] Who's going to run for you now? [...] Care for me, care for me why don't you care for me"

Mark Owen - Come On, this one is also off the 2005 solo album. Once again, the theme screams Robbie to me "And I want you to know, that you're all over me and I don't wanna fall so I land at your feet [...] won't you step on my bones, hey, won't you let me in and I'll kiss your palm this time and hope that you will hear. Don't wait for it, don't leave." And then the final stanza, that's the most important bit to me because he uses the same phrase as he does in Into The Wild, which is 'my only friend', it only ever appears in two songs and the implication of the reunion in ITW 'tied up again with my one and only friend', very much assumes that he must've called him that before and that before exists in Come On and only in Come On. "And then, then my only friend, you give me all you can and say you'll be my love"

[violentdelightshavevioletends]

A random post for Dain Aetos ... because not only is he growing in my favorites list as I process Onyx Storm, (and an even better character in re-reads, as I do those briefly & with bestie who's finishing OS) ... he also just doesn't get enough credit (something l am also guilty of) and now I think he might even deserve to be a favorite. (While I won't excuse his earlier behavior; and no this is not about Sloane alone) I also will give credit where it's due... and hope he doesn't betray this post into aging horribly in the upcoming two books!

A (hopefully) brief summary of his "first read" character journey with me: …

I'm sure there's more to say but this is the best l've got rn lol

FW (Fourth Wing)

At the very beginning of the book I liked him and I thought l'd grow to absolutely love him (l'm a sucker for friends to lovers). The fact he knew Violet, understood the nature of EDS, and helped take care of her was sweet & for a time felt supportive.

However, that quickly became a frustration as it felt like he didn't actually know Violet; he knew an idea (or one-sided view) of her. And while time had passed and he has changed, she did too & he quickly forgot that/refused to see how she changes & grows. ... Well-meaning as it was, he began making choices for her and wasn't actually listening to Violet herself, which at times was endangering her by not seeing the situation as it was. Which led to me quickly becoming frustrating by his belittling & the control + the danger this posed by her not training correctly; and just generally showing his very one sided view & inability to change or grow or allow that for anyone else.

Then, by the time Liam dies my heart broke & twisted; if he had known in any way then he was dead to me too... however, he didn't know.

IF (Iron Flame)

Dain is wracked with guilt. He knows Liam died, he does feel responsible. He doesn't know what is fully going on but his best friend despises him, his father is being unusually shady, and then he has to deal with Varrish. None of this mattered to me half as much as it did in re-reads. As scenes like the sparring actually really frustrated me, and I wanted her & her boundaries respected.

But then he does save Violet... and at the cost of killing leadership. That was a huge turning point.

One to process but also one that was felt in the moment.

Also it gave hindsight to the fact he did let her go, even as it broke his heart, he knew she did not love him the same way and he really did just want her to be happy.

There time with the journals helped a lot, too.

OS (Onyx Storm)

This book was by far the most tolerable he has been. And I felt like everyone picked up on it in some ways. Even joking with him being annoying in a manner that felt like healing between him and Violet, and at least tolerance with Xaden... and little moments of Karma.

And I will admit I was very intrigued by Dain with Sloane because they have a good sassy banter, she keeps him in line, and I couldn't quite put a pin on what it was with him & her... until further into the book where it really started to become apparent.

A scene that got me was him allowing Sloane to hit him, he knew she needed to get it out and he took it so someone else wouldn't (in any other circumstance this would be incredibly abusive; I am purely talking fantasy fiction magic here and as I said there's more than one side to it) the other moment being him getting Sloane to siphon him by egging her on using the words he knows aren't true because he didn't care who hated him so long as Mira lived.

He also becomes better at compartmentalizing such as his list of "things to talk about later"

He's become more of a rebel time and time again and l've grown to love him and his loyalties for it even if trusting it was difficult.

Now this is where re-reads got interesting:

For one, because I’m sure his character was heavily impacted by the POV (as stripped down to its base it’s understandable on some if not more levels): —FW— he has probably spent the past year watching the friends he made there die. And while he is a different person all he knows of his past life is who they were as he’s been without contact; that is something he’s probably clinging to for comfort (& logically is all he can know of them since it’s been a year). Then, one day, that best friend (who is not built for this) and has spent their life training for the complete opposite (not to mention is a known target for half of the trained-killers there, some of which are his classmates) shows up with an order from the big sister (in both of your lives; as he knew Mira too & I’m sure she passed it along at some point) to keep her alive at a place designed to kill her. Then, she starts hanging out with the very people who want to kill her, who have already injured her, and who Dain has been told (up until this point) throughout his entire life (or whatever the time period is since the rebellion; side note on that: remember they also lived through that as children… which was probably terrifying. And to him (as well as Violet) it “got Brennan killed”. He had to lose another friend, and watch Violet live through that, and then again with Asher dying “from a broken heart” over it) by everyone he trusts are very bad people with no proof on the contrary (and no reason to go seeking it). … While we’re talking about the past lets go onto something we learn in —IF— As briefly mentioned earlier; he’s been being trained by Varrish (who is absolutely awful & there’s no way he didn’t take that out on poor Dain; and no one deserves that). Two, possibly even worse; he was raised by General Aetos (who turns out to be an absolute monster & I cannot imagine being any kind of good if not non-abusive father). & Three, once again what he did in that interrogation cell… from the moment he got there to the moment he left he only had one plan: saving Violet. I really think everything he said in that cell was to her, and not in the way she heard; the “you should’ve trusted me sooner” I don’t think it was because she betrayed him, I think it was because if he’d have known he could’ve helped avoid the past five days of hell she’d had. And while Xaden gives Violet the killing blow, Dain struck a lethal wound & was prepared to go for the kill and intended to do so. It didn’t matter what he saw in memory; what lies it “proved” (because again for credit; what he saw could’ve very easily been proof to Violets betrayal without explanation) and sure he had guilt over Liam… we see that time and time again (even after the audience & main povs stop blaming him; like I said he even goes so far as to egg it on for Sloane because he knows she won’t hurt someone, so “hurt me” he tells her as if he deserves; it which he does not). Dain is ready to die with & for the rebels, he tells Imogen behind him in —OS— because he believes they are going to burn, and he will die first, rather than letting her; he doesn’t do this because he loves her, he doesn’t do it as chivalry, he does it because he is good guy at his core. At his core he will always be the best friend we all loved and we see more of that over time.

So, while his trauma doesn’t make him a good person, I will say for all the traumatized children we compare him to; he is actually one of them. He is an equal to them all. And same goes for his choices because he is just as good and in the fight for that. He’s messed up, but he’s trying. And he is doing it without friends or support, he’s going against his father (who he’s probably terrified of and knows will die in this if he does not first). … And maybe he belongs in the inner circle of favorites, alongside the friends… I hope he is given after everything. I hope he is worthy of the respect he’s earned.

Mostly now concern exists for the post-OS world… and he better not say “I told you so” to Violet. But for some reason, I’m leaning towards thinking I don’t think he will. I think he’ll see Violets heartbreak and allow her to be heartbroken for a moment at least, and then also say some helpful (even if painful) DONT YOU DARE GO VENIN FOR HIM along with being on “Dutchess of Tyrrendor guard duty” cause NO you can’t kill her to get to Xaden (… also it’s doubtable that would work since riders have been shown to outlive their dragons in this new Venin world)...

[kikiwie]

————————— 𐔌⋆🍓 ̟ ˚ !! 𐦯 —————————

too good to be true pt.3

r.suna

after the final message was sent, suna swallowed anxiously. he should have set the time sooner because he had to wait now. you two have been exchanging texts, and he would come see you at the shop often, which he claimed was to grab things for his sister. (he’s a liar he just wanted to see you.) but this was not like the other times. you two would be alone, one on one.

he flushed, rolling around on his bed, entangling his fingers in his hair anxiously. you made him so giddy, so excited. he didn’t know what to do with himself. he likes you. suna has long been aware of it.

the more he saw you and spoke to you, the stronger the feelings became. but it was unclear how you felt about him. he groaned into his pillow. all he could hope was that he wouldn't look foolish.

8 p.m. arrived quickly. suna would have gone crazy if he hadn't prepared his outfit beforehand. he wore the same style as usual. but he made an effort to appear nicer and cleaner. even selecting his expensive fragrance. he tries his best. all for you.

he had to give himself a double take before he left the house. repairing any flyaways and making sure his clothing didn't look bad. even though he was nervous and his palms were sweating, he knew this was not a date. although he was secretly wishing it was.

…well not so secretly.

he saw you standing there, just finishing up, as he was heading to the store. all of his problems seemed to vanish when he saw you look up at him and your face brightened. never in his life did he feel so stupid for overthinking.

"hey," he said, sounding out of breath as he approached you. his tone made him want to bang his head against a wall. but you simply radiated effortless beauty, and it did make him breathless. you returned his greeting with a smile.

"let’s go," he said with a smile before beginning to stroll to your destination. "where are we heading?" you trailed after him, until you were touching his shoulder. his breath seemed to catch in his throat.

"you’ll see, i think you'll like it," he said, grinning down at you. "are you going to kidnap me or something?" he couldn't contain his laughter at your response. “no, are you crazy??" you simply linked your arms together and smiled at him.

as he gazed down at you, suna became tense but then relaxed. it felt like his heart was about to burst. or his head? he didn’t know. all he knew was that he was happy.

"alright, we're here." there was a seat that led to a tiny pond. it was beautifully lighted by the surrounding lights. “wow, this is the first time I've been here! talk about knowing a spot.”

he found his place next you after you took a seat first. both physically and figuratively. observing you as the light lit up your face. it warmed him from the inside out. his desire to be with you has been confirmed in that moment.

the night was spent chatting, laughing, and making remarks. it was more than enough for you both. suna, however, craved more. since he became aware of his feelings. he wanted more than to be just your friend, he felt somewhat selfish. he desired to be your boyfriend.

he turned to face you after hearing your sigh. "i’m just so happy, thank you for bringing me here." knowing that he felt the same way, he grinned.

"i should probably go home though, my mom will be away tomorrow morning, so I have to open the store." he was a little disappointed, but he understood that you had responsibilities. "i have volleyball practice, so yeah, we should go. i’ll walk you home."

he stood up and held out his hand to you. you took his hand and said, "you don't have to."

"well, i want to. don’t worry," he said with a smile that made you feel nostalgic.

“i mean, who am I to refuse the sunarin?”

“oh please, shut up and let me walk you home.”

as you reached the front of your house gate, he didn't want things to end so quickly.

the world wasn’t ending, although it felt like it, he just didn't know when your schedules might line up again, he could tell you didn't want it to end either based on your face.

“well, thank you, rin. i’ll head inside now." you sounded a little let down, and something inside of him snapped as he heard his name coming out of your mouth. he stood contemplating as you were already making your way to your gate.

oh, fuck it.

“wait!”

he sounded a bit desperate, and he cringed, but he couldn’t find it in himself to care now.

"yeah rin?" you asked, tilting your head to the side as your palm rested on your gates knob. he started to inch closer to you. he remained silent, causing your brows to furrow in confusion, and you began touching the knob anxiously out of anticipation.

a hand reached out to slip a lock of hair behind your ear, before stopping to cup your cheek. his gaze moved from your eyes to your lips, he bit his lip nervously. “may i... give you a kiss?" you nodded as your eyes became wide and you began to doubt your voice.

suna then bent down to give you a kiss.

(a/n: thank you for reading guys!! hope you all liked it. more to come soon! 🍓)

pt. 1 & pt. 2

————————— 𐔌⋆🍓 ̟ ˚ !! 𐦯 —————————

[we-were-beautiful]

Unraveled Ends Chapter 3

a/n: Hey look, it's a new chapter. So a little heads up this one is not beta read. I went through it several times, but I am admittedly not the best at beta reading my own work. So No Beta we die like men in this chapter. Still though all the love to my beta for this story she truly is amazing. All my photos for the moodboard/aesthetic come from pinterest. I apologize for any mistakes there was minimal editing done to it. Hope y’all enjoy  Shout out to @whisplion for inspiring this fic.

Summary: A tailor in the heart of Velaris finds herself mated to the two most powerful fae in Prythian. Unfortunately for her the mating bond only snapped for her, leaving her to question on how to move forward. Should she wait for her mates to feel the bond or should she go ahead and reject it and live with the gaping hole in her heart  

Poly!Feysand x Reader 

Warnings: Drinking. And a Drunken Feyre

WC:2.4k

“You want to break your mating bond?” His voice sounded almost sad. I can’t fathom a reason as to why though. The bond didn’t snap for them, so in theory, it shouldn’t have any bearing on  Rhysand and Feyre.

“It’s not so much as a want, Rhysand.” I pause trying to string together the correct words to explain my thoughts. “It’s more that I don’t think I can handle the heartbreak.”

“Why not just tell them.” His eyes search me over looking for some rationale behind my thinking.

“They already have their perfect happy ending, Rhysand. They’ve sealed their bond and started their own little family. Where would I fit in all of that?” I give him a sad smile. Some deep part of me wants to scream ‘Where would I fit in to you and Feyre’s perfect little family’ 

“I’ve already made my peace with it, Rhysand. I think it will probably be better for me to just break the bond myself rather than go mad from the rejection.” I try to give him a smile. 

At least with breaking the bond I would be able to function and provide for my sisters. No, I would just lose all sense of emotion from what I’ve read. But if they were to reject me I would go mad; lose all sense of self. Having to live my life with never quite feeling whole, always missing them. I would take wandering around emotionless than pining endlessly over people who didn’t want me.

“Please tell me that you will think about this, and not rush into anything.” The High Lord pleaded with me, eyes filled with emotions that I couldn’t quite discern.

“I promise. That's why I wanted to talk to my friends in Day. I know a few who have done research on the topic, and Helion said he could discuss the process with me.” If anyone would be able to break the bond it would be the spell cleaver himself.

“Ok, just please don’t rush into anything.” His face settled into a neutral expression with a sadness lingering in his eyes. 

I make quick work of getting his final adjustments before letting him get changed. A heavy weight settles in my chest after he leaves. I want to break down; let all my emotions out. To scream to The Mother at how unfair she was being. Beg to know what I had done to deserve this. To be mated to a pair that was already so happy without me. To beg, plead, and bargain for The Mother to dissolve the bond herself and spare me the consequences. I was a hard working female. I worked long hours to provide for my sisters; I do community service when I have the free time. I volunteer at Adelaide’s school. I’m a good person, and what do I get? A lifetime of suffering. Gods above I really only have two options. Face the rejection that is almost certainly coming or live out the rest of this immortal life stripped of emotions. It's not fair.  Right now all I want to do is cry myself to sleep, and deal with all these problems later. 

‘Go home,’ the shadows whisper, nudging me towards the door ‘you worked too long on too little.’ 

Ever my constant companions. At least I knew that with the shadows I would never truly be alone.  I pen a quick note to Genevieve to pick up Addy and some food. I just wanted to go home and curl up in my bed. I pray that Rhys and Feyre will give me some reprieve tonight.

Days pass by quickly and before I know it a month has passed. I had managed to avoid Rhysand and Feyre as well as their friends for the most part. I changed my schedules based on their appointments. If Feyre was scheduled to have a fitting, I would make myself scarce.  If Cassian and Nesta came in to pick up their outfits, I was just on my way out. I couldn’t avoid Amren though she showed up unexpectedly to grab her outfit while I was working. Luckily for me the tiny fae women could care less about me avoiding their group. I provided good work, and that is what she wanted and cared about. 

My trip to the day court was planned for later this week. I was picking up a shipment of the stunning white linen that the Day court had been known for. While the pure white itself was stunning; the fabric also took in dyes beautifully, and I was hoping to create some wonderful summer sets out of it. I had also been corresponding with Helion about when I could get an audience with him to discuss my issue. I think that this particular conversation might be the deal breaker for me. 

Minnie, one of my seamstresses, had begged me to go out to Rita's with her tonight. I only relented after a few days of her nagging me. We had gotten ready at the shop before walking over to the beloved bar. Three drinks later, I have let loose for the evening; the alcohol easing the tension in my body and lowered my inhibitions. Minnie and I ended up on the dance floor before we knew it. I let the music flow through me. In another life I might have been a dancer or a musician. I loved the freedom that dancing gave me, but I refrained from coming out to the clubs. I had sisters to take care of, and partying wasn’t being responsible.  

“Sweetheart!” A familiar voice comes from behind me. I whip around to see Feyre standing there with a goofy smile. 

“Dance with me.” Her voice is slightly slurred as she drapes her arms around my shoulders. She's tipsy at best, shitfaced at worst.  

Sober me would have said no would. Sober me would have taken her back to Rhysand, and let him take care of her. But right now with most of my guard down, I can’t deny her. The selfish part of me wanted to soak up this moment, and just pretend that she was mine even if it was for a bit. So I dance with her. I move my body along with hers to the beat of the music. I pretended just for now, for this song, that they were mine. That somewhere Rhys was watching us with that seductive smirk of his basking in the glory of his two mates. Feyre and I pull out all the stops to drive Rhys insane.So that he would set down his whiskey and join us on the dance floor. Would whisper promises in our ears before winnowing us home to continue the party away from the prying eyes of the customers of Rita’s.

But all too soon the song dies, replaced with a mellow slow song. And reality slowly starts to settle back in.

“You’re pretty.” Feyre slurs, wrapping herself around me. Her words sober me up. Her silver eyes filled with so much admiration that it nearly physically hurts. 

“And you are drunk.” I tried to laugh but a knife was twisting in my heart. “Let’s get  you back to your mate.”

I force my mental shields into place not wanting any of my secrets spilling out. My eyes scan the room looking for the high lord. Eventually I was able to spot Illyrian wings. That typically signaled the General and the Shadowsinger. It is a slow process to move the drunken High lady across the clubs to the booths. Feyre did not make the process easy. She clung to me and dragged her feet not wanting to leave the dance floor. Eventually, we are able to make it to the booths. There we find Rhysand and Azriel. Seeing the large wings on the highlord was shocking. I had heard whispers that Rhysand could summon wings, but I had never seen them myself. I had never thought he could be more beautiful, but I stand corrected. 

“Feyre Darling, and Sweetheart what a surprise.” His eyes brighten up at the sight of the two of us.

“Rhys look who I found.” Feyre giggles stroking my face, a smile growing on her face. She stumbles just a bit, and I have to scramble to catch her. 

“I see Darling. You found our dear sweetheart.” He laughs at the two of us.

“I danced with her, Rhys. I wanna keep dancing.” I slowly moved her closer to the booth. In an attempt to get her to sit down. Thank The Mother I am able to get her to sit on the bench with a little bit of prompting. I try to move away but she is quick to grab my hand holding it with a surprising strength keeping me close to the table.

“I think the High Lady might have had a touch too much.” I tell the amused looking High Lord.

“Rhys!!!!” She slurs drawing out his name in a whine “Make her dance with me.”

“I think it might be time to take her home.” I look between the two amused males at the table. 

“You don’t want to keep dancing Sweetheart?” Rhys raises his glass of whiskey to his lips staring at me in interest.

“As much as I would love to keep dancing with the High Lady. I do have work in the morning, and I still have to get ready to go to Day later this week.” I shrug, at this point home seemed like it would be the best option for me “I’m probably about to head out. 

“Noooooooooooo.” Feyre whines wrapping her arms around my waist as if to keep me here with them “Stay.”

“I think that is my cue to take her home.” Rhys quickly drains the whiskey in his glass. 

“Darling. Let's walk Sweetheart out.” He gently coaxes her to let go of my waist. 

“Fine.” I chanced a quick look at the Shadowsinger to see his shoulders shaking in barely contained laughter. He obviously finds this whole situation hilarious. I ought to put three extra stitches in his wing slots. He would still be able to wear it but it would make it ever so slightly uncomfortable for him.

Eventually we manage to coax feyre to the door. I had paid my tab before I went to the dance floor, and Minnie was nowhere to be seen. She probably took some female home with her. We had parted ways on the dance floor shortly after we had moved from the bar. 

The moment Rhys had let go of Feyre she decided to latch herself back on me. 

“Come with us. We miss you.” She buries her face into my neck “We never get to see you anymore.” 

“Darling we have to let Sweetheart go.” Rhys attempts to gently remove Feyre, who has all but koalaed herself to me.

“But we won’t see her again.” She struggles against her mate snuggling further into me “She's going all the way to Day for two weeks. And then its Starfall and she not celebrating with us, so we won't get to see her until we have to get new dresses” 

So Amren had let that fact slip. I knew she had been looking at the papers on my desk a little too closely.

“Well, we can ask her if she would like to celebrate Starfall with us Darling. If you want to see her; you can always see if she will go get lunch or coffee with you.” He gently coaxes her to let me go. 

I feel the gentle scrape of a claw along my mental shields. I ever so slightly open a crack for Rhysand. 

‘Once I get her off of you, I’m going to winnow her home. I’m sorry that she decided to latch onto you.’ He whispers quietly in my mind.

‘It's ok, make sure she gets home safely.’ It's a polite response. 

‘Will do. Please send me a note letting me know you made it back to your home safely.’ The concern in his voice is unusual to me but I nod all the less. Soon enough Rhysand pries his wife of a me and has picked her up in a bridal carry. 

“Have a good night Sweetheart.” He winks before winnowing away to their home. 

With the two of them gone it feels like a weight has been lifted off of my chest. My trip to Day cannot come soon enough. Just this little taste of what it would be like with them kills me. They didn’t mean it though; Feyre was drunk and clingy, and Rhys would have told her whatever he thought she wanted her to hear so that she would let go. They didn’t mean what they said and that hurt. I got a glimpse of what having them both would be like only to have the rug ripped out from under my feet. 

A hand lands on my shoulder causing me to jump. I whirl around getting ready to fight off whoever grabbed me only to be met with the Shadowsinger.

“Everything good?” He raises a brow. 

“Yeah Rhysand is taking the High Lady home.” I force a smile on my face.

“Heading home, yourself?” He cocks his head to the side. 

“Yeah, I wasn’t lying about having work in the morning.” I sigh. Work was going to suck tomorrow. The Starfall rush was in full swing and I was going to be gone right in the  thick of it but I couldn’t help the fact that my manufacturer was running behind, and this was one of the first times Helion could meet with me. 

“Let me make sure you get home safe.” Azriel says and motions for me to lead the way. 

We walk together in a comfortable silence.  He doesn’t push me to talk to him; he just walks behind me like a terrifying bodyguard. I had always liked that Azriel was comfortable with silence; he never tried to fill the silence of his appointments with mindless chatter. Eventually we made it to my family's home. 

“Make sure you tell Rhys that you got home or he will burst into your shop like a worried mother hen.” Azriel deadpans. 

“I will write him a note the moment I get inside.” I let out a little laugh “Thank you for walking me home Azriel.” 

“It was no problem.” He gives me a warm smile. “I will see you later.”

Azriel’s massive wings spread out and with a mighty flap he is airborne and heading into the sky.  I quickly open the door and shut it once I have entered it warmth. After locking the door I start towards my room.

Note then bed.

Made it home- Sweetheart. 

With a quick flick of my wrist the note is off. 

‘Tomorrow will be better.’ I lied to myself as I striped and crawled under the covers.

Soon sleeps claiming me in her cold arms.

Tag List: @nyctophiliiia @rachelnicolee @goldenmagnolias @jesssicapaniagua @sweetorangeblossom @cat-or-kitten @alowint @dream-alittlebiggerdarling @coldpeachkitten @esosadomd @araneea92 @saltedcoffeescotch @persephonesalvatore @motorsp0rt @motheroffae @butterfix @unfortunatelyuntiltheend @kissesfromnovalie @daughterofthemoons-stuff @saturnalya @thecraziestcrayon @hjgdhghoe @phoenixgurl030

[sugarushwriting]

look what you made me do

stalker jungwon x f reader

part 4

not proof read

adult and disturbing content may be featured. read at your own discretion. this is a work of fiction.

››››

it’s been almost two months. 57 days to be exact, since you last seen or heard from yang jungwon. since that night when you and your friends danielle and asa escaped from that god-awful cabin in the woods.

that night where you all supposedly killed your kidnapper, jungwon, and his friends, ni-ki and kai. however to the police, it wasn’t them.

it wasn’t jungwon, ni-ki, or kai’s body they found. it was three strangers you, danielle, and asa have never met. you all were dumbfounded.

the police may have let you all go, but that didn’t mean anything. you specifically felt eyes watch your every move.

waiting for jungwon to jump out the shadows and kidnap you for his own pleasure once again.

asa moved out of the city and to a country side with some family in hopes she couldn’t be found. danielle has been with her sister traveling in hopes if she didn’t stay in one place too long, she wouldn’t be caught.

you were the only one stuck in the city, alone, feelings of being trapped and waiting for him to strike at any time. any place.

asa and danielle seemed to move on from what happened in the past months with kelly and maya along side the boys.

you jumped anytime the phone rang, your doorbell rang, a knock came at the door, if your neighbor dropped something outside in the hallway.

your coworkers noticed differences too, as they were aware of your kidnapping, which some gossip to say it was a bad trip of you and your friends, and how dare you not get arrested for murder!

“I AM INNOCENT!” you had yelled once. throwing a cup of water at the woman who wouldn’t shut her mouth.

your boss simply allowed you to work from home for a while rather than come in the office. the thing is, you didn’t even feel safe at home. you felt safe nowhere.

you constantly thought about cameras jungwon had hidden in your apartment. but the police found none.

it’s not like you had the money to move or stay at a hotel. your family lived across seas now and you didn’t have the money to go stay with them and book a ticket.

unlike the other girls, you didn’t have money like that.

your phone rang interrupting your thoughts. you jumped, and answered, only to hear heavy breathing on the other side. no words.

“hello!” you screamed into the phone.

it hung up. your eyes went wide and you nearly jumped once more when the phone rang less than a minute later.

“listen asshat, i don’t appreciate the calling with no talking!” you yelled.

“um, miss? i was just calling about your food delivery.” the woman on the other line said. you could hint the worry and shock in her voice.

you felt hot in embarrassment. “oh, i am so sorry, yes, i’ll be at my door.”

your new instructions for ordering food; ‘call before delivering. women to deliver only.’

it was still pushing it safety wise to get food delivered, but you weren’t the best cook and often times was too lazy to do so.

“i’m sorry, can you come get your food from outside? i hurt my foot and can only walk so much on the boot.”

shady. weird. suspicious. questionable.

“set it on the bench, next to the statue of the squirrel.”

yes, the owner of the building had a pet squirrel and put a small stone statue next to his favorite bench he would come visit.

“oh-kay.” the woman whispered and mumbled under her breath, calling you a weirdo.

you quickly dressed in long clothes, a hoodie covering your face. you waited 5 minutes before heading down to grab your food.

dumb idea, your inner conscience was warning. but you were hungry and had no food in your apartment.

looking outside it was dark and empty as usual. a few pedestrians here and there, but going on about their night.

with a gulp, you quickly went out to grab your food next to the statue, and quickly walked back, heart racing fast hearing rustling in the bushes by the bench.

you learned to never look back, to wonder, or investigate the sound. you beelined it back to the lobby, thankful your complex finally put a lock on the main door entrance.

you safely and swiftly got back to your apartment, locking, double locking, and using the newly installed bolt.

with a sigh of relief, you walked to your couch to enjoy your food. maybe there was nothing to fear.

three days later you found yourself back at the police station, kim sunoo sitting across from you at the station table.

“why am i here?” you had asked earlier and sunoo simply smiled in response. that was 20 minutes ago.

“it seems your friends have left you behind.”

you shrugged. “they’re enjoying time with family.”

“why? it’s not like they’ll get arrested for murder.”

you gulped. “we didn’t do it.” you gritted through your teeth. you were found innocent. you all were. you had good lawyers.

the door opened slowly and in walked yang jungwon, dressed in simple clothing, a bit tan as if he was soaking up the sun on an island beach.

your world stopped. it seemed your breathing stopped. your heart stopped. “what’s—what’s he doing here?” you mumbled out with a stutter.

he was back. yang jungwon was back. how long had he been back? had he even left? had he been watching you this entire time?

you nervously picked at your nails and skin under the table.

sunoo greeted jungwon. “glad you could make it in. how was the vacation away?”

bullshit. he wasn’t away. at least not that long. “bullshit.” you whispered.

sunoo looked over to you, as well as jungwon. jungwon’s stare was flat, and it made you uncomfortable and shiver in your seat. his eyebrow raised asking you to challenge his whereabouts.

you shrank back in your seat. he was insane. you had to be careful. you couldn’t risk your life. but, wasn’t your life already at risk now?

“can, can i go?” you asked sitting taller in the chair.

“after you explain to jungwon, why you thought he was the one who kidnapped you.” sunoo stated.

“it’s not a thought! he did kidnap me! he took me and my friends!” you slammed your fists on the table. jungwon didn’t flinch.

“you saw the plane tickets. the receipts. how could that be?”

you pulled and tugged at your hair. your head dropping into your hands. “i don’t know!” you groaned. you slowly looked up seeing the smirk growing on jungwon’s face. “he’s insane!” you shot up from your seat. “look at him! i don’t know how he did it but he did it!”

you stalked towards jungwon, his face back to being flat, acting shocked and worried for you. you got in his face, grabbing at the collar of his shirt.

“how did you do it huh? who were those guys? what did you drug us with! how did you drug us!” you rambled on, shooting off accusations left and right,

sunoo pushed you off of jungwon. “don’t make me put you in hand cuffs.”

you chuckled in disbelief, “please do! actually ask your cousin, i bet he has a pair!” you snickered out.

jungwon laughed before covering it with a cough. “i mean i do, but the hand cuffs are for different purposes.”

your mouth dropped open. that’s it. you only saw red. “you motherfucker!” you screamed and lunged towards jungwon.

soon, two other officers came into the room and held you back. you attempting to fight them off was no use. screaming profanities, in between crying, and yelling at jungwon.

once out of the room, jungwon turned to sunoo with a smile.

“thank you.”

︶꒦꒷♡꒷꒦︶

around 8 pm you finally found yourself back to your apartment. exhausted, eyes and face puffy from crying.

thankfully your lawyer showed up and looked at you with concern. “what did you do? what did you say?”

“i’m sorry mr. park.” you cried.

your lawyer drove you home after scolding the detectives for even placing you in the room with someone you’ve had nightmares and believed was stalking you.

at least he believed you. sort of.

when you went to wave goodbye at your lawyer and thank him for all he’s done for you, with a smile he encouraged you to call him by his first name.

“please, you can call me jay.”

he and his partner, sunghoon, owned park & park, a private owned business. they both defended those who could and couldn’t afford lawyer fees. their favorite was to take on cases that were difficult into proving either a guilty or non guilty verdict.

you got into bed around 10 pm, laying awake, feeling as if every sound was amplified and mocking you. all you could do was stare at the ceiling until your eyes finally felt heavy. it wasn’t until 7 am when you fell asleep with the sunshine through your curtains.

when you awoke, which felt like 5 minutes later, you groaned and stretched in the bed, the mattress feeling a lot more comfortable than your usual mattress.

the covers were fluffy and smelled so good. almost woody? like a man.

your eyes flew open, and you stared at a ceiling that wasn’t yours. the ceiling was industrial like, with beams and pipes.

you sat up in the bed too quick, you groaned in pain as your head started pounding. “fuck!” you whispered. fingers going to your temples.

you heard a deep laugh. you looked up slowly, afraid to see who’s laugh that belonged to.

“park sunghoon?” you murmured. he smiled showing off his canines.

“aye great, you’re up!” he smiled standing. “jungwon, hurry and get out of the shower! she’s up, i’m done babysitting.”

jungwon!! how many fucking people did he know? how many was working with him?

“wait!” you reached out to sunghoon trying to get him to help, but you couldn’t get far when you noticed your right foot chained to the bed frame below. you looked at it confused, pulling at it in panic trying to break free.

“won’t work squid.”

his voice. you swallowed. you looked up, your hands still on the chain, sunghoon replaced by jungwon. jungwon who only had on boxers and a towel around his shoulders, his hair wet.

your licked your lips unconsciously. you should not be lusting over him right now.

“like what you see, squid?” he smirked. you frowned.

“no.” you replied, letting go of the chains. you crossed your arms. “how’d you get me this time?”

jungwon smiled. “it helps when your lawyers were my classmates.”

“classmates?”

jungwon walked closer to you, sitting on the bed beside your waist so he was close. “they’re a little bit older than me,” he began, a hand resting on your bare thigh, “but we got close fast. they were also teased a lot at their high schools. they were willing to help me get back what is mine.”

“i am not yours!” you tried to remove your thigh from his hand, but he gripped onto your flesh.

“you have been and always will be, squid.” jungwon’s voice darkened. he squeezed your thigh once then got off the bed and back to the on suite.

“where are my clothes!” you yelled for him to hear you, and went back to tugging on the chains in hope.

he came back out, toothbrush inbetween his lips. “they looked uncomfy, i prefer you in my clothes.”

he disappeared back into the bathroom. you sighed in defeat, looking over to the window overlooking the city. you seemed ways away from the city, but not isolated in the cabin. it was dark out still, small lights to be seen.

“how long have i been out of it?” you asked picking at the hem of the shirt.

jungwon came back out, minus toothbrush and towel, only in boxers and dry hair. “a little over 13 hours. jay put too much chloroform on the cloth. had to get them to swap shifts to make sure he didn’t kill you.”

“13 hours?”

“well, not all at once. anytime you started waking up we knocked you out again.” jungwon said as if it wasn’t a big deal. “i had to make sure every thing was in place before you gained consciousness.”

“how far are we from the city?”

“far enough.” jungwon answered and kissed the top of your head catching you off guard. he sat in the bed next to you, cozying up. “lay down, let’s watch a movie, squid.”

you turned to look a his frame laying down. he had you once again. and this time, you don’t think you’d ever get out of this. at least, not without a fight that may have you end up dead.

©

mhmm part 5?

thank u to the person who requested a new update

how comfortable would you all be with a smut scene between reader and jungwon?

like share comment reblog and send requests!!

[gothsuguru]

doing the heavy lifting in a convo can be so tiring omfg

[impostorsshow]

I'm actually so obsessed with him it's not even funny if i'm not listening to a TikTok or music directly related to him I can't focus free me free me

This is @/cherubpuppet's OC for a object show [au? pitch? wip show? How do I categorize this] and I've been destroyed by the fact that ruler art is infinitely superior [and 10x longer] and i don't have a good enough grasp on lip gloss's personality to make fanfiction so I am frozen in "want make fanart but fanart takes effort :["

[tazzmanian-devil]

im so scared of the future. i dont know what im going to do with myself. i am not mentally capable of working enough hours to support myself without killing myself. i truly believe that if i lived alone i would burn my house down. i cant work jobs that require a lot of standing or interacting with others. i dont have the autism that makes me good with computers to do something online. i have no idea what im good for. i dont even draw well or often enough to do commissions, and i feel too guilty about not being in a difficult financial situation to even offer them.

i dont know how to apply for disability or what it would even grant me besides tax benefits. one of the questions on the website is for employment status, and the two options are employed and unemployed/seeking employment. i do not think i am capable of working a regular job, and i have no idea what IRregular jobs there might be. i tried reaching out to my school's employment coordinator, and her ONLY advice was to sell my work. i am trying!

maybe it would be different if i felt more direct and specific pressure of a problem to solve and less general pressure to do what im supposed to without knowing what that is. im living with my grandfather and aunt right now, so im not feeling housing pressure. my parents are paying for my education, so im not feeling pressure to pay that back. why do i need that? what is it for? what is my goal? i dont know. i have money from student loans in my bank account paying for my groceries.

i feel like a horse whose ass has been spanked. something is driving me forward, but i dont know what or which direction to run. i have no idea whats coming, and its horrible. i dont know what i want or what i should be doing next, except for 'get a job' which is such a vague instruction that its leaving me spinning my wheels.

i should get a job so i can live alone...but i dont want to live alone. i dont think i CAN live alone, unsupported. what is any of this for??? i start taking steps forward, and im haulted each time by myself asking why? why am i doing this? whats the point? what do i want from this? nothing? i want nothing? im only doing this to satisfy external pressures? then whats the point? cant i just watch movies all day instead? whats the point?

[eff-exor]

something smells like shit, and it ain’t me buddy

[my-thoughts-and-junk]

thinkbing about. him

[johndonneswife]

someone really should be talking about how difficult it is to plan a wedding - a gay wedding - when both of your families fucking suck