#btw this is not a made up this all actually happened and I'm so lost and confused omg
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The whole "if a person is mad at you it's their responsibility to tell you" thing just made me realize how fucked my situation is. Like just. woah
#who wants to hesr the story of how I lost my irl friends recently (you will I'm spitting everything right now)#anyway so last year one day one of my friends decided to randomly backstab me and she started talking behind my back#and yeah this all made me mad because?? what the fuck#she started talking and revealing stuff that i had confide to her to other people and they slowly started drifting from me#BUt the thing here is that she was manipulating the story. she changed it every time she told stuff to people to make me look bad#i heard one of the things she said about me once and i was like ?? she even make me dislike me in her version which like woa#anyway I didn't understand why she did that because it was ? so random? and then she started ignoring me and has not talked to me ever since#the thing is. she apparently didn't have enough with just doing that. she slowly started to rot my other friends' brains too?#in the sense that. suddenly the rest of my group was ignoring me too. they never said anything to me. or stated that they had a problem#they just ignored me in my face? and yeah that. hurt#recently i found thanks to a third party that one of them decided to stop talking to me because apparently i had hurt her uncountable times#and she was just soo sick and tired of me doing that. which. honestly made me mad because she did not ever express that to me?? so#what was i supposed to do. if she never said anything.#anyway one of my friends confronted her about the treatment they were giving to me. the whole exclusion thing. and her answer was-#”well it's not my fault that she doesn't have more friends and doesn't talk to people”#and i was like. woah. what a poor reply. is that really it.. also apparently they all had agree to stop talking to me as a group-#-and they never informed me so. thank you?#and I'm still here asking what i did to that ex friend of mine. later on i found out she had hooked up with the guy i used to like btw#and she kept it secret. oh and then i started dating my current partner ! person she also felt attracted to. and that's my only explanation.#she started gossiping after what happened with the first guy. so that's really everything that comes to mind as a reason#ANYWAY now that i was at the hospital i didn't receive a single text from any of them. so i guess that was it. people who don't care-#-like that are not friends. those people are not my friends. people who ignore me on purpose and gossip like that are not. my friends#so yeah that's why I've been feeling down lately but ! here I am i ended up ranting so. much#rant#vent#?#woah i actually feel so much better after spitting it all#I'm also following that sour grape advice btw I'm not giving them the privilege of cutting me out. I'M the one who dislikes them now
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I met a guy four or three days ago at a friend's sister's quinceria, instantly became best friends with him, we cyber bullied my racist ex crush, played roblox together, and s*xted the other night and talked on the phone all night, and he told me on said video call when I asked him to call me baby-
"i love you babe"
WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK HOW.
(warning small nsfw details in tags)
#we fucking sped run our relationship holy shit 😭#we're not even offically dating because he's on#only recently got over his ex#and has commitment isdues#I've known this guy for FOUR DAYS.#i didn't know this mans EXISTENCE BEFORE HAND#btw this is not a made up this all actually happened and I'm so lost and confused omg#it was also the first time I've ever sexted someone 😭💀#shitpost#idk how to tag this#moots#mutuals#help 💀#help my sanity#i got a love interest in literally two days#not even exaggerating#he also said when i m*@ned he creamed- SEND HELP#what do i do#what do you think?#what is wrong with me
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Hi can we please have fluff w Aventurine where reader and him reunite after 2. 1 and just fucking elope start a new life etc? Please I need it.
God yes. This is what we all need after 2.1. I'm aware he is in a coma-like state technically now but for the sake of fluff and this headcanon he is awake from that coma and is now reuniting with you. CW: Spoilers for 2.1 and Aventurines actual name, starts angsty but then turns fluffy, Gn reader, pre established relationship hurt/comfort
I am still accepting requests (especially for aven) btw so if you wanna see something send it in!
Back in your arms
You had lost track of how long it was since Aventurine left for his mission in Penacony. Has it been 2 months? No, probably more. It had been months since you last had been able to make contact with him. Your messages no longer went through, unable to be sent.
Looking at your textlog and scrolling up, you came across the last message he had sent you. It had come in while you were asleep, and it simply read “I love you”.
Waking up to that message would have been a sweet message for most people, but for you it had made you immensely worried.
Aventurine was never someone who professed his love openly, so such messages were quite rare. Receiving such a message, especially unprompted, made you send him a barricade of texts, none of which went through and even now months later none were able to be sent.
If you were honest you were starting to lose hope of ever seeing him again, who knows what happened in Penacony after all? He could be…dead for all you knew, you had no way to verify whether that was true or not after all.
You tried continuing your life on as you would normally, what else could you do? It was hard though, everyday you missed him more and more. Sometimes you imagined his face in a crowd somewhere but whenever you would take a closer look he would vanish.
Sighing you closed your phone and looked around your apartment, it felt so liveless ever since Aventurine was gone. Tears were falling down your eyes as you wondered how much longer you had to live with the uncertainty of where he was and if he was even alive.
Exhaustion was taking over as you began falling asleep. A common occurrence nowadays, since at night you were restless, unable to fall asleep as you worried. Just as you were beginning to fully doze off, you heard the door to your apartment open, immediately waking up.
No one but you and Aventurine had the key, and with him being absent panic coursed through you thinking someone was breaking and entering. You grabbed the nearest heavy thing to defend yourself with.
“For fucks sake…” You muttered as you made your way to where the noises were coming from. Cursing every entity out there for piling even more shit onto you as if your significant other being possibly dead wasn’t enough.
Readying your weapon (probably a heavy book) you stepped foot into the room where the noise was coming from ready to attack and hit the intruder. But once you saw who it was that was in your appartment, you dropped your makeshift weapon, a sob escaping your mouth.
Before you stood Aventurine, alive and breathing. You rubbed your eyes, making sure that this wasn’t your mind playing a cruel trick on you again. Aventurine watched you with a smirk on his, albeit very exhausted looking, face and his eyes held a new found softness you had never seen before.
You fell into his arms immediately, holding him tightly against your body, feeling his warmth. Desperately you grabbed at his clothes as you held on to him, scared this was all just a dream and you would wake up all alone once again. Tears were falling from your eyes, unable to hold them back, the relief washing over you making you let out all of your emotions.
“Wow you missed me that much?” He asked, in his usual teasing tone. Though there was something in his voice that usually wasn’t there. Desperation and a bit of fear. Was he afraid you wouldn’t have missed him? Or was there a deeper reason for it?
Moving away from the hug you grabbed his face in your hands, the tears still falling from your eyes as you took a good look at him. His face had fallen in, and he seemed exhausted. But there was also something in his eyes, his beautiful eyes you were so sure you would never see again, that you couldn’t recognize, having never seen it on him before.
Before you spoke your first words to him, you pulled his face closer and gently kissed him. The feeling of his lips on yours felt like you were floating in heaven. They may have been more chapped than usual, but fuck was it nice to feel him again. Breaking the kiss you finally were able to muster up your first words to him.
“Fuck…I was so worried about you…I…When my messages stopped being able to sent I was…so sure you…Please…never worry me like that again Aventurine…”
You leaned your forehead against his, your words jumbled together from the adrenaline coursing through you.
He took in a deep breath, and held it for a moment before letting it out. A gesture you saw in many people before they needed to say something important and heavy, but one you never saw in your lover.
“...Kakavasha…” His voice seemed unsure and meek as he spoke.
You, of course, had no idea what he was saying, so you looked into his eyes confused.
“Wha-”
“Kakavasha…it is…my given name. The one my mother gave me” He inhaled deeply before he continued.
“It is a long story but the short version is…I am no longer affiliated with the IPC, they probably think I died or something. So I no longer go by Aventurine, and…with how close we are and how much you mean to me. I felt like it was appropriate for you to know my true name...”
His eyes refused to look at you, flickering about unsurely as he spoke. Though he tried to sound confident, his voice wavered, scared that you would not accept him for who he truly was and reject his true self.
You looked at him gently and with all the love you had for him, gently pulling him close again and kissing his nose.
“Well then…It is nice to meet you Kakavasha…” You smiled brightly at him, showing him you accepted him as he was.
He felt relief course through his body and could not help himself but pull you into a passionate kiss. He kissed you like you were the oxygen he needed to stay alive. As if he would die without you.
Breaking the kiss he whispered “Marry me.” It wasn’t a question but a request. One that you were too stunned to answer to, looking at him with wide eyes.
“I mean it. Let’s get married, run away from everything and start a new life just you and me.”
His eyes were pleading with you to agree. He knew that he wanted to start over, but he knew he needed you with him.
“...yes!!” You once again fell into his arms and kissed him. The two of you holding each other so closely it was as if you were one.
Kakavasha knew that he would need to tell you everything that happened in Penacony at one point, even the part where he tried to end his life. But he knew that if he explained everything to you, you would still stay by his side and be with him.
You were his family after all.
#honkai star rail#honkai star rail x reader#hsr#hsr x reader#honkai star rail spoilers#hsr spoilers#aventurine#hsr aventurine#aventurine x reader#hsr aventurine x reader#honkai aventurine#kakavasha#aventurine fluff#honkai star rail imagines#hsr imagines#aventurine honkai star rail#aventurine x you#hsr x you#hsr 2.1
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Oh God, What Have We Done??: Father!Solomon Headcanons
You know what? I'm a Solomon love-hater but I'll go to bat for him too. You could pick worse.
Contents: Unhinged Ms. Frizzle-style parenting, the horrors of human biology, possible pregnancy implications, fluff
~♡♡♡~
So. I can see this happening intentionally. Solomon craves a happy family, so I absolutely see the thought of rasing a kid with MC coming up once or twice.
That said, I think zero planning actually went into making it happen. This is a spur-of-the-moment decision made by two lovesick dolts. Not a damn thought was spared for the consequences, and it shows.
For starters, MC and Solomon both agreed to raise a child together while they were in the human world and told NOBODY ELSE. So from the outside looking in, they just left the Devildom for “training purposes” and returned with a random infant!
No call ahead. No fanfare. They both stepped out of the portal with a flying stroller and bottomless diaper bag, grinning from ear to ear like it all was just souvenirs from Disney World!
Naturally, all hell broke loose. The brothers were collectively hyperventilating, Simeon almost fainted, and Diavolo noticed that Barbatos wasn't moving or blinking, so the Little Ds had to carry him away like a malfunctioning android...
Does Solomon having a kid make him a grandfather…? He is not ready to ponder that thought. No one is.
Despite Mammon and Belphegor’s insistence they had to “Put it back!” after MC made it clear that raising a baby was what they wanted and that Solomon was there to stay, the brothers made peace with it… to varying degrees.
Asmo was the only one thrilled that his favorite humans now have an even cuter mini-human to take around because he'd get to try his hand at baby fashion design! The least happy was probably Belphegor because a baby means that MC is going to be way too busy to nap now. Plus, he had to deal with a lot more Solomon in his life, which very few people ever ask for...
The crew's reaction to the baby's development is actually pretty funny to see. Humans age much, much faster than their supernatural counterparts so, from their perspective, the new baby is growing at lightning speed!
Mammon was with them when they were teaching the baby to crawl and he started freaking out because, “How’re they movin' already!?” The first day their child came running, physically running, into the HoL without any help actually made Levi scream in fright.
The House had a complete meltdown when Beel was watching the child one day and they lost a tooth while eating some hard candy. They all thought that MC and Solomon were going to burn the place down, so imagine their surprise when the overjoyed parents kept congratulating their kid for losing a baby tooth...
And don't get any of them started on the growth spurts...
The one to take to the kid the most as they grew was, funnily enough, Lucifer. Most likely because their various milestones reminded him of when his brothers were doing the same things.
The child is more than happy to tell “Uncle Luci” anything, which he acts like he only tolerates, but in reality he loves being their favorite brother.
Barbatos is EXTREMELY protective of them. Nearly as protective as he is with Diavolo.
Their kid, of course, has no clue. He's just nice Uncle Barbie (he refused to be called Grandpa) who makes them sweets and watches over them in the Castle. But anyone who get too close while they're playing gets a stare down worse than all of Cerberus’ heads combined...
Mammon swore in front of them once and Barbatos strung him up so tightly that even Lucifer thought it was overkill.
Luke seems to enjoy having a baby sibling of sorts to look after, but he is going to be so upset when they get taller than him in the blink of an eye. He’s going to be their guardian angel for sure, btw.
As a father, Solomon is… spirited. Anyone can see that he’s ecstatic to be a parent, it’s just…
Well, years of isolation on top of being a once-in-a-lifetime prodigy may not have made him the most “in touch” with children these days, you know? MC has absolutely come home to find Solomon has propped up their 6-month-old with a stack of books to start teach them how to play chess.
Daddy-Baby adventure always end in spectacular fashion. Solomon is a very “hands-on science teacher” kind of guy with unwavering confidence in his abilities to keep his child safe. This, to be fair, isn’t unwarranted, however...
Does that mean you should make a plans to take your child to forbidden places for some sightseeing? Or let your child touch, paw at, and gnaw on any magic item that suits their fancy in the name of a making a new teaching experience...? Probably not, but it’s also how he learned so…
It must be assumed that whatever kid these two have, biological or not, will be a magic powerhouse of destructive proportions. All that training from Solomon himself since infancy? They'll have a wand in their hand before they can even work a fork!
I like to imagine that Solomon's kid would have a very, very hard time controlling their magic and it would get uncontrollable at times. Like, a sneeze could knock over a bookshelf or getting angry makes things go flying. But Solomon would never ever scold them for it like it’s they're fault.
He'd never make them feel the same isolation and shame that he did at their age.
It would be very, very sweet. But it also means that MC could come home to a flooded house and, instead of cleaning out the water, Solomon would teaching their child how to snorkel in the living room.
Pure chaos, but MC could never find a prouder father. Solomon would devote his entire being to giving their child all of the love and happiness they deserve. Their kid almost never sees him without a grin on his face, just ready to just wrap them a bear hug for no reason.
On quiet nights, he'd cradle them or rock them to sleep while holding back tears. MC has found him over their crib like he’s still trying to convince himself that they're real, that he's gotten this lucky.
He's not a conventional father. Hell, he's not a conventional human either. But he’s grateful for day he gets to be a parent... Every. Single. One.
#tales from the drafts#obey me#obey me shall we date#shall-we-date-obey-me#obey me solomon#obey me nightbringer#omnb#obey me headcanons#obey me scenarios#solomon x mc#solomon x reader#tw pregnancy#tw: pregnancy
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How Leehan would ask their crush out and omg the rest of the members being his wingman (esp Taesan)
thank you sm for this cute little req! I'm giggling and kicking my feet over the scenario already hehe! (´,,>ω<,,`) ♡
˗ˏˋwingman bnd headcanons! pairing: leehan x gn!reader. overview: leehan has a crush and goes to his friends for advice! genre: fluff, crack (kinda) word count: 2.9k warnings: none. ♡ note: not very confident abt this one.. not sure if this is exactly what u wanted but agghhh here it is! (sorry for the wait btw!) chose to write this only w legal line, so there's no woonhak (as they're in university). hope you enjoy dear <3 likes & reblogs r very appreciated ! . . . @onedoornet
𐚁๋࣭⭑ okay firstly, imagining leehan with a crush is the cutest thing! it first started out as slight interest, after he saw the person across the campus a couple of times. his eyes kept meeting theirs and it just made his heartbeat all rapid and weird. and before he knew it, he was thinking about them before bed each night, making up silly scenarios, and looking forward to seeing them in the daytime. he'd be such a cutie in love ( ᴗ ̫ ᴗ )
𐚁๋࣭⭑ he went on like this for a while, thought he'd be fine with just catching glimpses of his crush in the hallways, daydreaming about them and simply admiring them from afar.. but he became more smitten by the day, the ache in his heart only grew and he didn't know what to do with these feelings anymore, eager to know their name, and to turn the made-up scenarios into reality.
𐚁๋࣭⭑ but the problem was that he just didn't know what to do! being inexperienced when it comes to crushes and confessions, he felt so lost :( even though he's generally pretty confident, he didn't feel the same when he thought of the person. he wanted to impress them!! and he felt as tho he had to try extra hard to do that. still, he has no idea what to do..
𐚁๋࣭⭑ but what does he have his dear friends for?! I think it's logical that he'd go to the one he's closest to first, taesan in this case, to share his troubles with him and ask for advice! knowing he would never expose his little secret, and under no circumstance would he judge him for it either ofc!!
𐚁๋࣭⭑ but somehow, it just so happens that everyone else in their little group miraculously knows about his debilitating crush. (riwoo caught on pretty quick, then jaehyun coaxed it out of him just to go announce it to sungho) so.. a group meeting it is! ٩̋(ˊ•͈ ꇴ •͈ˋ)و an emergency one too! *boynextdoor assemble* hehe
like just imagine them sitting around this exact table discussing ways for ihan to get his crush to like him back. I'm not okay 😭😭
𐚁๋࣭⭑ so back to the serious business.. we have leehan all deep in his feels abt how much it hurts to long for this person he doesn't even know, almost on the verge of crying as he speaks.. while jaehyun has tears in his eyes from holding in his laugh for so long.. what a pure menace. unable to sit still for like 10 minutes, gosh… he actually just thinks leehan is adorable and ridiculous at the same time, finding the situation quite silly. he thinks leehan should muster up the courage and just ask them out, rather than crushing on them secretly.
𐚁๋࣭⭑ he'll eventually burst into a hearty cackle at a random moment, which will inevitably earn him a stern look from sungho, urging him to shush up and listen. I can't w these guys srsly..
𐚁๋࣭⭑ now, sungho.. he's so into the story, he's already plotting his scheme and thinking of ways to help out the poor guy. since he remembers seeing this person in some of his classes, he plans to observe them silently, in hopes of gathering some useful information. he even proposes the idea of slipping secret love letters into their bag.. ૮ ⇀‸ ⍝ა (this will have jaehyun snickering and riwoo shaking his head disapprovingly) he's just channelling his inner superspy, let him be u guys. 😭
𐚁๋࣭⭑ he'll desperately try not to come off as a stalker, but someone needs to tell this man that, unfortunately, the sheer size of his broad shoulders really limits the amount of potential hiding places...
𐚁๋࣭⭑ anyway.. so, taesan. he is the one that listens the most intently and quietly, soaking up all the information. considering that leehan's been holding all of this in for so long, he'd need to express his feelings openly, he'd need someone to listen well. (it's why he went to dongmin in the first place) and he does indeed fit this position perfectly!
𐚁๋࣭⭑ he's not one to say much in the moment, just waits for him to let it all out. (but it's also cuz he has absolutely no idea who leehan's talking about and doesn't have anything to say.. 😭😭) so he's just there for moral support (for now!)..
𐚁๋࣭⭑ moving on to the most thoughtful one of the bunch, who's softly stroking leehan's back as he sniffles and hiccups through his confession.. riwoo! who will be responsible for arranging a lunch date! ✩ a role which he assigned to himself. haha. since everyone meets up to have lunch together on most days anyway, riwoo thought it'd be a good idea to invite leehan's crush along sometime!
𐚁๋࣭⭑ now let me tell you abt the silence that settles around the whole table at this statement. it would have them speechless. cuz. that's a bold statement sanghyeok!! very good.. very nice.. we're making some real progress here! *cough* jaehyun *cough* sungho.. but the question is.. how do they invite the person without it being weird?..
𐚁๋࣭⭑ fear not! bcuz riwoo has a solution for that too LOL 😭😭 riwoo, surprisingly, got to strike up a conversation with this person somehow, and bond over their favourite desserts in the single class they shared.. an interesting way to make a friend, but leehan doesn't care abt that rn!! riwoo can actually get him a date w them!!! ⸜(*ˊᗜˋ*)⸝ his heart is yippee-ing so hard rn. u don't even know…
𐚁๋࣭⭑ and just like that, they'd end up at a cafe near their uni, sat and waiting.. and waiting… (jaehyun) calling riwoo a liar, yada yada. leehan is busy hyperventilating and fidgeting from the nerves, even though he himself isn't sure if he'll actually get to see his crush today.
𐚁๋࣭⭑ taesan, despite being unsure as well, still gives him an encouraging pat on his leg, just in case. none of them believe that the person will show, even sungho is doubtful, scrolling on his phone mindlessly. but riwoo, who organised this whole thing, is relaxed, and unprovoked by jaehyun's remarks.. that's why he's the only one who actually helps ihan calm down, telling him he'll do just fine in a reassuring voice <3
𐚁๋࣭⭑ imagine the surprise on all their faces when the person actually shows up.. and boom! leehan's heart drops to his stomach. in contrast, there's a smug look on riwoo's proud face hehehe. Ꮚ˘ ꈊ ˘ Ꮚ he's a man of his word after all!
𐚁๋࣭⭑ but there's more. taesan's eyes go wide partly bcuz the person actually showed up, and mostly cuz he's actually friends w them 😭 no because.. this is too hilarious, picturing leehan's dumbfounded expression when he drops this enormous bomb on him.. *insert jaehyun losing his mind giggling in the corner abt this whole thing* taesan is friends with his crush??? this information would've been useful like, at least 20 minutes ago.
𐚁๋࣭⭑ anyway, taesan won't disappoint any further though! he'll introduce leehan to them himself and try and get the two comfortable w each other. he'll actually be doing the most! you can imagine how awkward first meetings can be, but taesan is determined to eliminate all of that awkwardness and get them talking!! he's on a mission! ₍ᐢ..ᐢ₎⊹ hehe
𐚁๋࣭⭑ he'll keep going on about his awesome best friend, telling stories and complimenting him nonstop. he'll never ever! bring up an embarrassing story either, he's a true friend hehe! not just then, but any chance he gets after their little lunch date, he'll be insufferable w his praise! he's just super passionate abt helping ihan successfully woo his future partner ^^ (he's sure they'll end up together) and he finds them to be a perfect match too! so, he's trying his best to get them to like him back!! what a sweetheart <3
𐚁๋࣭⭑ as soon as their date comes to an end, expect leehan to be all over taesan interrogating and bombarding him with endless questions. but he's more than willing to answer them! thanks to TS, leehan will have all the basic info abt the person, their interests, their favourite artists, their hobbies, who they're friends with, places they like to hang out and such.. what a helpful guy!
𐚁๋࣭⭑ he's kind enough to even relay some messages to the person, about how leehan said it'd be nice for them to come have lunch with all of them again.. and he obviously exaggerates, complimenting them in leehan’s stead. he's a sneaky kitty! ( ˊᵕˋ ; ) hehe but he doesn't go overboard ofc!
𐚁๋࣭⭑ donghyun's crush tagging along their lunch dates becomes a regular occurrence at some point, as they gradually warm up to one another. leehan's heart could burst at the tiny interactions they share. everyone keeps nudging leehan to talk to them, and to finally ask them out, saying it's not that serious, that it's just a date. but it is that serious for poor ihan, when his heart is about to jump out of his chest at the mere thought of his crush. he wouldn't know how to handle it if the two of them were to be left alone. he's so in love gosh.. 。 ˚. ૮Ꮚ ´͈ ⁄⁄`͈꒱ა
𐚁๋࣭⭑ they would all encourage him to take the next step in their own ways! taesan would try and talk him into it, while riwoo would take a more straightforward approach, and save seats for leehan to sit next to his crush, just so they can be closer hehe. sungho would randomly go off abt some cool new place that's opened recently, telling leehan to go check it out with him sometime. (the mastermind has a plan!) and jaehyun, I can kinda imagine him spilling a little bit of his drink (supposedly) accidentally on leehan's crush, just so leehan can have an excuse to help them out. tbh ihan would just look at him with a confused/irritated expression, as myungjae winks at him.. he's trying his best okay?
𐚁๋࣭⭑ I can imagine the sneaky smiles the rest of the boys would exchange at the slightest things, like when the two sit close to e/o, or when they touch hands on accident, or at times when they catch leehan staring at his crush with the most obvious heart eyes.. ₍ᐢ⸝⸝› ‹⸝⸝ᐢ₎ they're having sm fun lmao.. but they're also just happy to see their friend finally talk to someone he's liked for soooo long. such cuties <3
𐚁๋࣭⭑ sungho's proposal to go to this new fun place would actually strike interest in leehan's crush so.. it's a date! you've no idea how thrilled everyone would be to finally have leehan take his secret crushing further and go on a date with them!! (well plus sungho..) leehan can't really process what happened.. that sungho just casually got him a date.. well, kind of.
𐚁๋࣭⭑ I can imagine sungho helping leehan get ready for the date as he gives him a pep talk 😭😭 gosh it'd be the most adorable but hilarious thing.. he will help him choose the outfit, and won't stop adjusting his clothes like a worried mom lol. you'd think he's the one that's head over heels in love, with how worried he gets. but that's sungho for you! ૮₍ ´ ꒳ `₎ა always so caring when it comes to the others <3 <3
𐚁๋࣭⭑ leehan will literally sit/stand there with a hyper focused expression, taking everything in.. like, he doesn't wanna mess it up, you know! so any piece of advice is welcome. especially when it's coming from his most trusted friend <3 he'll be nodding and listening deep in thought, as sungho gives him pointers on what to do or not to do. an adorable little duo ^^
𐚁๋࣭⭑ …and then there's jaehyun. (bear w me while I push my menace myungjae agenda pls) who just happens to be there, not because he wants to help but just turning up to be a nuisance (again). this boy strikes me as someone that will tease. and tease he will! like, he'll tell him something that'll have leehan full on stressing.
𐚁๋࣭⭑ now look.. he doesn't wanna scare him, but he can't help adding more and more to his joke cuz poor ihan's thoughtful look just brings him sm joy LOL. the way his brows furrow in worry, looking to sungho for reassurance.. ૮ ˊ͈ . ˋ͈ ა only for the oldest to just stand there shaking his head in disapproval at jaehyun’s nonsense.. just a group of sillies.. ♡♡♡
𐚁๋࣭⭑ myungjae will eventually just burst out laughing, and admit to leehan that he's just kidding and that it'll go perfectly fine.. so basically, he would joke around but he'll also genuinely show up for him! it's just his way of showing support hehe
𐚁๋࣭⭑ and then we have taesan and riwoo just sitting there, quietly observing this pure chaos.. the two kitties smile at the jokes and the bickering, entertained by simply listening to their conversations.
𐚁๋࣭⭑ but when the time comes for leehan to set out, they'll be first to rush and give him words of encouragement and wish him good luck! taesan tells him to just be himself and everything will go smoothly, as he drowns him in perfume at the last minute. while riwoo just advises him not to go off abt his fish and it'll be just fine 😭😭 he tells him his looks will do the trick. which, true.
𐚁๋࣭⭑ and sungho... is nowhere to be seen. he must've slipped thru the door when everyone was busy, sly little fox he is. ૮ • ﻌ - ა when leehan takes notice of this he starts panicking, but the others tell him to go, or else he'll be late and that sungho will probably just meet them there.
𐚁๋࣭⭑ hmm.. ihan senses sth suspicious about this whole thing, but he doesn't want to make his crush wait so he complies. right before he leaves jaehyun will pipe in and ask to update them throughout the date, and at this point leehan is abt to combust from overstimulation lol so he just gets out of there.
𐚁๋࣭⭑ but it gets worse! bcuz he only hears from sungho thru text when he's already arrived. he sends him a single message saying: I'm not going, enjoy your date 😘~ you're welcome <3 …oh how leehan wishes he could magically teleport to where he is and give him a piece of his mind..
𐚁๋࣭⭑ sungho's really just doing this bcuz he wishes the best for his friend, but leehan doesn't realize that rn through his drumming heartbeat and the ever increasing urge to leave. he's kinda nervous, ngl. hah... haha . ha... srsly he's abt to pass out guys..
𐚁๋࣭⭑ in the end everything will be fine of course.. there's nothing to worry about, I mean.. it's leehan. he might mention his fishies here and there by accident but that only adds to his charm hehe ૮˃̵֊ ˂̵ ა esp if he stops himself mid sentence after.. telling his crush he's not supposed to talk about fish today 😭😭 they'd find this so cute.. nicknaming him fish boy in their mind cuz of it. I'm gonna sob..
𐚁๋࣭⭑ he's getting more comfortable w them, finding it easier to talk to them and even make jokes! seeing his crush laugh bcuz of sth he said has him melting on the inside.. lovesick baby <3
𐚁๋࣭⭑ and (ik I forgot to mention this oops.. but the date takes place at an arcade, which creates a better environment for the two to have fun and get comfy w e/o!! genius sungho.) he'll try to desperately win one of those plushies for him from those rigged machines, but he'll fail :( but at least he's cute while pouting hehe
𐚁๋࣭⭑ since ihan senses that they seem to get on quite well, he'll consider the idea of asking them out again. I feel like he would be pretty regretful not to have asked them out himself, u know, in a proper way. so he'll muster up all his courage at the end of the date, when he's dropping them off, to actually ask his crush out on his own, like he'd wanted to in the first place!
𐚁๋࣭⭑ he'll just tell them cutely that he likes spending time w them and that he'd love to do something like this again sometime, that he wants to get to know them better!.. and when his crush questions if he's asking them out on a date, he'll just blush and say he is shyly.. ૮ / / / ⍝ა ofc they'll say yes!! again.. it's leehan. have u seen him? also they really enjoyed today's date too, which they'll tell ihan abt and his cheeks are burning up at this point... cuties x
𐚁๋࣭⭑ numbers and shy thank yous will be exchanged. leehan promising to text them about their next date <3 don't u guys think it'll be sweet if they give ihan a quick peck on the cheek? cuz I do. just for the sake of making his heart flutter and see him go shy again.. what a cute sight it'll be gosh :'( <3
𐚁๋࣭⭑ safe to say, leehan goes to bed that day w a glowing ball of light in his chest, heart full and mind replaying moments from the date <3 baby boy's so happy. ૮₍ ˶• ˔ ต ₎ა ♡ he couldn't be happier.. already planning out their next date <3
𐚁๋࣭⭑ oh! almost forgot! he'll just send a simple text to the group chat that the date went well, cuz he's just soo exhausted.. immediately summoning the others w their endless questions smh. but that can wait until morning. also, just know that taesan will be the first to hear abt all the deets the next morning!! hehehe that's it <3
#uriwooS2#♡₊˚୨୧#onedoornet#leehan x reader#boynextdoor leehan#leehan fluff#kim leehan#bnd leehan#bnd fluff#boynextdoor fluff#boynextdoor x reader#bnd x reader#boynextdoor soft thoughts#boynextdoor soft hours#boynextdoor headcanons#boynextdoor imagines#boynextdoor scenarios#boynextdoor sungho#boynextdoor jaehyun#boynextdoor riwoo#boynextdoor taesan#bnd sungho#bnd riwoo#bnd jaehyun#bnd taesan#cream's fics 𑄽୧#cream's asks 𑄽୧
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harry nilsson quotes double feature: fact or fiction?
"Someone told me a few minutes ago they saw John walking on the street [once] wearing a sign saying – a button, rather, saying 'I Love Paul'. And this girl who told me that said she asked him, 'Why are you wearing the button that says ‘I Love Paul’?' He said, 'Because I love Paul.'" -Harry Nilsson
"I'm just like everybody else, Harry, I fell for Paul's looks." Harry Nilsson (on John)
these quotes get passed around unsourced, or wrongly sourced, constantly. so...
are these harry nilsson quotes about john lennon real?
shockingly, after getting an anon correction on the first one and then discovering myself on the second one through the world's most random search engine imaginable bc SOMETHING felt unfinished...... the final verdict for both?
...ish? the second one is sort of neutral bc it's taken a bit out of context but i'll get to that
let's get into it, because this one took me on a journey!
(and btw the sources on these were SUCH a pain in the ass to find due to lack of sourcing & wrong sourcing so i am on my hands and knees for these to get passed around w the proper sources now that they're in one place bc they're so good)
first of all, these quotes keep getting mixed up and messed around with different wording. which was my first road block on finding a proper source. second of all, they have been wrongly attributed to a) one single interview together and/or b) a rolling stone interview with nilsson. this made things aggravating. but in the end, an anon sent me the audio for the first quote and for the second one i FINALLY found someone a looong while back actually naming the book it's in & successfully found it!
made a post earlier concluding both were fake, but we just had to go a little deeper folks.
anyway, onto the good shit
who was harry nilsson? he was a friend of john's, specifically during his 1974 lost weekend era. they lived together for a while (along with others, including ringo!) and were pretty close.
"because i love paul"
this one gets misquoted the Most honestly like you'll find a bunch of different variations of it, but you can find it in a 1984 interview with geoffrey giuliano as such:
GIULIANO: Did he miss the Beatles? Was he mournful about what happened, over the, you know—? HARRY: Someone told me a few minutes ago they saw John walking on the street [once] wearing a sign saying – a button, rather, saying ‘I Love Paul’. And this girl who told me that said she asked him, “Why are you wearing the button that says ‘I Love Paul’?” He said, “Because I love Paul.” [laughs]
(source) (and again, it's a tumblr blog, but given that it's audio, i'm marking it trustworthy. i just uploaded it to archive.org in case it ever gets deleted)
"i fell for paul's looks"
this one. this one was a goddamn journey and a half. this sent me on several rabbit holes and dead ends. the author of the last source said "nope it's definitely not from the tapes i found this audio from or i would've posted it too" and couldn't find the source either. no one had a source. until finally i found someone on a forum saying it was in the ballad of john and yoko published by rolling stone in 1984, in an essay titled "harry remembers" and thank christ it was on archive.org
so here's the full quote, found on page 236
"He spoke the way James Joyce wrote. And to me he was the Beatles. He was always the spark. In a late wee-hours-of-the-morning talk, he once told me: 'I'm just like everybody else, Harry. I fell for Paul's looks. George knew more chords, so he was in. And Ringo, he's just Ringo.'"
(source)
so this one gets a... true/neutral rating from me. why neutral? well, the "i fell for paul's looks" part is certainly there. but in the full context, he's talking about why he wanted each member in the beatles. basically, paul was the pretty face. however, he did say that verbatim and it is incredibly fucking gay imo. like specifically the "i fell for" wording is craaaaazy to me. but i do think the full context should be included if we're talking about it, as well as the actual source.
so no, they were not indeed both from the same interview. one isn't even FROM an interview. but they are both true! which is great bc i love both of these quotes and truly thought they were fake! pleasantly surprised on this one
now, take these with a grain of salt. the first quote is a third-hand source. it's nilsson recounting what some random fan told him john had done YEARS prior. the second one is a second-hand source and nilsson and john were like pretty infamous for getting drunk/high together. but the quotes themselves? certainly exist from harry nilsson, and that's the question. believe them if you want to, or leave them! i'm certainly taking them lmao
#mclennon#type: factcheck#checked: true#A REDACTION...... truly stunned at these im ngl but you know what. we all have the sources now and i can move on in peace#had to pause this to go get coffee w a friend i was literally a lil late bc i was trying to speedread that essay FJASDFJASDF
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Girrlll this line😭😭😭😭😭
“He turned to her, his golden eyes smoldering. "What sort of woman chooses a MORTAL over a GOD?!"”
I HAVE to to know how Apollo would react to learning that Percy’s mom, a human, essentially choose a human man over Poseidon😂😂😂
And a life of “poverty” over the underwater castle lifestyle Poseidon offered?!
lol I can just image his face rn!
Great chapter btw!!!!
TO BE FAIR....
it was a wise ass move cuz literally NOTHING good happens to mortals who stick close to a god, let alone accept their gifts/offers 😭😭
hades constantly stuck around maria and their kids? BOOM (literally, lol) maria got blown up and hades lost his shit and cursed the oracle which led to a whole other mess(es) 💀
pluto swore on the river styx to give marie anything she wanted and she asked for all the riches of the underworld and BOOM she got a cursed daughter (hazel 🥺) with years of childhood trauma who accidentally revived gaia's son, alcyoneus, which eventually led to BOTH of their deaths (and more messes) 💀
beryl grace got obsessed with the attention from zeus/jupiter and craved for more? BOOM she's dead from a drunken car crash with one kid a tree and another one raised by wolves 💀
hermes always coming by to visit may and luke? BOOM may went crazy, luke started a revolution, and hermes now has years of depression to unpack because he tried desperately to change luke's fate despite knowing it was pointless 💀
sally jackson fucked poseidon, got a kid out of it and that was it. she was spared from any horrible terror that the other mortals went through (thank gods for that). can you imagine if she had actually accepted that offer???? with zeus' stupid "gods can't interact with their mortal children" rule AND his burning hate-boner for poseidon (and eventually percy) AND with percy being a forbidden kid destined to have a shitty life because she's the product of a broken vow AND the fact that she decided to stay close to a god AND accept his gift/offering AND there's the fact that poseidon would've done ANYTHING to try and save them from any bad fate (and fail just like hermes)???? oh the fates would've cooked up a HORRIBLE ending for her and percy 😭😭
literally i think every single character that stuck too close to a god or accepted their gifts/offering got a tragic end or one of the most traumatizing backstory ever or at least horribly affected someone close to them (like their kids), meanwhile the worst percy had to deal with was bullying in school and some level of physical abuse from gabe before The Plot happened 😭😭
the ror gods would definitely give sally jackson shit for daring to reject a god (and even chose a human over one), but that's the thing: they're gods, arrogant and cruel. most of them wouldn't understand the depth of tragedy that they cause (or care)
smarter and more empathetic gods like hestia, buddha, sun wukong, etc. would notice the subtle details and realize that sally jackson made a VERY smart move because holy shit, everything SUCKS for any mortal who gets too close to a god in that universe💀💀💀
honestly, because most of the greek myths are just fanfics in ror verse, the whole "tragedy is a part of the greeks" isn't really the same for the ror!greeks, only the pjo!greeks because those tragedies were REAL for them, and some are even repeated. so most of the ror gods wouldn't get just how TRAGIC things are for those in the pjo universe, at least not right away 😭
(also, i'm starting to see why zeus made the whole "no interacting with ur kids" rule because DAMN terrible shit keeps happening whenever they do it too much and get attached 💀💀💀)
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I feel TOH fails a lot with the treatment that Belos and his lore receive towards the end. I think his arc will feel so much more complete if the show was allowed to show us that he suffered in the past and wasn't like "nah he is just pure evil and he has always been like that". I don't like how the show wants you to believe that Caleb did nothing wrong or reprehensible when there's obvious implications that he abandoned Philip to go with Evelyn, it will be so much more interesting that the show recognized that Caleb was naive and selfish in abandoning his brother (who only have him as family and support figure) to his own in the puritan era, and how that action of Caleb deeply damaged Philip emotionally and mentally (kinda like Luz abandoning Camila to live her fantasy in the Boiling Isles without thinking in the consequences (I'm still pissed that she didn't apologize to her mom for running away at the end) but we are not talking about that right now, I love Luz btw don't get mad at me). And Philip, who probably entered the Isles with the sole intention to "save" his brother who at his eyes was bewitched and seduced by an evil witch to go with her, when he finally found his brother after many years and found out that Caleb actually loved Evelyn and DECIDED to leave him behind he totally lost his mind.
A confrontation escene between Philip and Caleb (it could be a flashback or something showed in Hollow Mind even) will be so interesting to watch, something like in the third season of Infinity Train when Simon confronts The Cat for abandoning him as a child, Caleb will try to justify himself at first saying that he is sorry, that he thought Philip was going to be okay on his own, that he didn't thought that he was going to miss him or something, making Philip more angry, sad and confused.
The situation will scale to the point that Philip, (who's original goal was to kill Evelyn to bring back Caleb in the Human Realm) now that he is angry, sad and out of his senses he tries to attack Caleb with the dagger he had in his hand which triggers the knife fight in which Caleb dies.
Philip, after realizing that he killed the only person he had in the world, he tries to justify himself in an internal monologue like: "oh well, I murdered you, but in doing so I freed your soul from the union with that sinful witch. That's what the witch hunting taught me, right? That's what YOU taught me, RIGHT?". Trying to shift the blame for what just happened onto Caleb but also letting us know and acknowledging that it was Caleb who introduced and instructed Philip in the witch hunt and did nothing to reverse it.
Coming to the end, when the fight ends and Belos and Luz are face to face, the scene would play out more or less as we see it in canon but at the moment in which the first drop of boiling rain falls on his hand and begins to see his body dissolve, he enters a mental breakdown in which he realizes that he wasted his entire life on a goal that made no sense, the witches weren't evil or a threat and he knew it, but he clung to his goal because he did not want to face the reality, he did not want to accept that he had killed his brother in vain nor did he want to accept that he had decided to abandon him, and he did not want to die knowing that he wasted 400 years suffering for something that was not worth it. At the end of his collapse he would crawl a little and see Hunter in the distance (because yes, Hunter should have been present in the end even a little), he would try to extend his hand in his direction but Hunter, noticing this, would close his eyes, look away and take a step back behind Eda and Raine. Philip experienced his brother's abandonment again but with the difference that this time it is merely his fault, because even if Caleb damaged Philip deeply with his abandonment, he is not responsable of the path Philip choosed to take.
Seeing and realizing all of this Belos would stop crawling and give up, lying on the ground, breathing hard as the boiling rain finally dissolves him and dies.
Or at least that is how I liked it to happen, let me know what you think.
#toh critical#toh criticism#belos toh#luz toh#philip wittebane#toh salt#toh#the owl house#hunter toh#hunter noceda#emperor belos#hunter wittebane#luz noceda#hot takes
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This Marriage Will Break You
Pierre Gasly x fem!reader
From this request
Summary: You had to arrange a marriage contract with Pierre to cover up his old relationship. He was still seeing his ex while you were madly in love with him and according to everyone you were the bad woman in this triangle.But when your breaking point came, Pierre noticed you.
a/n: I tried so hard to make it long, It's probably pretty ridiculous but that's about all I can do (not edited writing btw)
You had to marry Pierre to cover up his past relationship, you didn't know why they chose you, you just wanted to believe it was because you were so good at acting. Your acquaintance with Pierre was based on your childhood, in fact, you grew up in the same environment as him and you liked him all your life, actually this arranged marriage made you happy at first.
But as time went on, you saw that this marriage was actually the opposite of what you expected, a kind of marriage that will upset you.Of course, you didn't have very high expectations, but you didn't expect that Pierre would still secretly meet with his ex, that you would still bury your love for him in your heart and that the fans would blame you for the separation of the two of them.
According to Pierre's fans, you were the bad woman, but no one saw what was going on inside the house and what happened was not very heartwarming. You were under pressure from your family because your relationship was not realistic, and Pierre almost never came home, when he came, he only went to his room and slept, the company said that you should try harder, and your relationship with the fans was not very good, when they saw you, they either looked at you badly or simply ignored you. Pierre, on the other hand, was enjoying his life with his ex.
Within a few months you had collapsed physically and mentally from the pressures on you, but it took a long time for Pierre, your family and the company to realize that. You were trying to take care of the house as much as you could, and one day, while cleaning in the morning, you accidentally broke a frame and that was your breaking moment. You didn't know that Pierre was at home, you sat in front of the frame and you started to cry, you didn't know why he was crying, you were just too full and you couldn't stand it, you tried to shut yourself up with a sigh, but you couldn't stop. Then the door in front of you opened and Pierre came out of his room, you tried to shut yourself up by pressing your lips together, but it didn't work. Pierre felt a pain in his heart when he saw you, he had never seen you like this and he was just realizing how much weight you had lost in a few months, he came and hugged you.
You didn't want this, you didn't want him to pity you, you tried to get rid of his arms, but you couldn't afford it and continued to cry, he hugged you and stroked your hair until you calmed down, and when he finally asked "Are you okay Y/N", you just shook your head and wiped the tears from your cheeks. You needed his attention before, not now, as soon as he broke the hug, you stood up and brought the vacuum cleaner to clean the floor. Pierre was watching you sadly, forcibly took the broom from your hand and stopped it "Stop doing that please" you looked at him angrily "What, did you think I'm in this house now? I'm sorry I won't make a noise again. You can go on with your life as if I'm not there" as you reached for the machine he pulled back and he grabbed you and walked you to the sofa he made you sit down "Do you realize what you've become Y/N? what's going on with you"
"Why are you interested right now, why are you here right now, it's 11 o'clock, don't you have to have breakfast with your girlfriend?" Pierre turned for a moment and looked at the clock and that was enough for you. You stood up angrily Pierre pressed your shoulders and made you sit down again."Y/N I'm sorry I know this marriage wasn't quite what we both expected but,pff whatever, I'm just sorry I didn't realize you were getting into this, okay now wait a minute" Pierre pulled out his phone and called the company. He told them that he had been secretly seeing his ex for months, how he neglected you, how you had become because of the pressure they put on you, he told them that he would take care of you from now on and that it was his responsibility and not to disturb you.
It surprised you that he was so interested in you, but you still didn't expect much from him.You said, "Is it over? Thanks for your help" and got up from the couch and he grabbed you by the arm as you passed him. "Get ready we're going out" you were surprised "You have to go to a party? I have to dress accordingly, you know then they talk badly about me" Pierre sighed "No, I'm taking you out to dinner, I'm going to spend time with my wife" normally you were always kind to him because you didn't have a problem with him,and you loved him but now you were tired.
"Pierre you don't have to take care of me, I'm really fine you can go about your business I have to clean the floor okay" he didn't stop you when you stood up but called after you "No you're not okay this is not the confident strong and happy woman I married and I want that woman back so I will clean the floor and you're going to come to dinner with me wearing whatever you want, okay?" You knew it wouldn't do any good to oppose him, so you just nodded at him.
On your way to your room to change, you heard the sound of the machine and smiled a little.You were ready in 1 hour, you were dressed comfortably but stylishly you left your room looking for your lipstick in your bag Pierre was sitting on the sofa waiting for you he said "you look beautiful" you looked at him he was smiling and he said sincerely you thanked him and smiled.
While you were spending time together in the restaurant, you realized that he was interested in you for real. You were better than in the morning, you felt happier, you thought you would go home after you finished your meal and got up, but Pierre took you to the beach You were surprised that he was holding your hand. "Oh right, there are people," you said to yourself, but Pierre was holding your hand because he wanted to. You sat on the dock "Thanks for the food Pierre, I'm feeling better" nodded and smiled, it was a pleasant moment. then his phone rang of course his girlfriend was calling but Pierre didn't pick up his phone.
After that day, your life started to progress like a normal marriage for a long time, you were cooking together, cleaning the house, going out and getting to know each other.One night, Pierre said that you were going to attend an important event, you both got ready in a stylish way, holding hands and got into the car. Pierre looked a little nervous you took his hand to comfort him he smiled an kissed the top of you hand.
When you arrived at the place of the invitation, Pierre opened the door for you to get off and took his hand, you went in hand in hand again, of course, because it was a famous invitation, the press was there and everyone went crazy when they saw both of you.Pierre looked at you to make sure you were comfortable. You looked at him and smiled, after a few poses, you walked in, met and talked to the invitees. While you were chatting with someone, Pierre was only watching you, he was looking at you as if he was in love with you.
You had a lot of fun at the party with Pierre, you laughed, you danced, until the person who will spoil your taste approaches you with anger, Pierre's ex-girlfriend.You were laughing again at a joke Pierre made when someone came and grabbed you by the arm, and when you looked, you saw that it was him, of course Pierre immediately freed your arm from his hand and pulled you to him, "What do you think you're doing?" he asked angrily. "Pierre, do you realize how long you haven't been answering my calls and it's only because of this little bug" Pierre raised your hand with the ring on your finger and his own, and showed the girl, "If you remember, I'm married and it's been a long time since I finished this with you, did you hear me now, go away, and don't ever come near my wife again"
You were in shock and everyone was watching you as she walked away angrily Pierre turned to you and looked at your red arm. "Are you okay, did she hurt you a lot?" you nodded as if to say i'm fine "Pierre everyone is watching us can we go home" He looked around nervously, but when he turned to you, his gaze softened.He stroked your cheek with one hand then took your hand and took you out of there.
In the car, neither of you spoke at all, but it was clear how angry Pierre was, which frightened you a little.When he suddenly stopped the car and turned to you, you almost banged your head forward due to the sudden brake and your eyes widened in fear, "I'm sorry Y/N. But I have to say this, I won't let that woman come near us again okay won't spoil your mood" You nodded, but you couldn't believe what had actually happened."you were serious when you were angry with her ,you don't see her anymore" he just nodded.
"I haven't seen her since the day I promised to protect you.I should have done this sooner though" you smiled at him "Thank you" he looked at you "For what?" you watched him for a while "For being with me, by my side" He reached out and took you hand "Of course we're married after all and I have to take good care of my wife, and it wouldn't be right for me to know that my wife is madly in love with me and make her suffer like that"
Surprised, you pulled your hand back "You knew" Pierre laughed "Of course I knew Y/N, imagine if anyone else had gone through what you went through, they would have divorced me on the second day" what he said was right the reason you put up with him was because you fell in love with him.Pierre approached and took both of your hands, "I apologize to you with all my heart, will you let me love you as you love me" you nodded happily.
In the months that followed, everything became more beautiful than you had imagined. You had a real marriage with Pierre. You both loved each other very much. As Pierre promised you, you never saw that woman again.After the fans learned the truth about Pierre's ex, they started to treat you more kindly. You had the comfort of walking hand in hand in the paddock with Pierre.You two were happy.
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@gaslysainz
#violetszone#f1 imagine#f1 blurb#f1 smut#f1 fluff#violetszonerequest#pierre gasly one shot#pierre gasly drabble#pierre gasly imagine#pierre gasly smut#pierre gasly fanfic#pierre gasly fic#pierre gasly fluff#pierre gasly angst#f1 angst#f1 one shot#f1 fandom#f1 fic#f1 fanfic#f1 x reader#formula 1 x reader#formula one x reader#formula 1 oneshot#formula 1 fanfic#formula 1#f1#pierre gasly
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OOO I have another one that came to me in a dream! Basically the kingdom yn lives in hosts a ball which anyone can attend and yn let's say they're a maid/Butler attends and shadow milk (I'm obsessed with him right now) asks them for a dance and as they're chatting while dancing the yn notices that shadow milk knows a bit more about them than he should and as the dancing goes on he becomes more dominant practically not letting yn step in their own two cookie feet! And as the music stops a dread suddenly dread enters the dance floor and the only thing yn remembers happening after that is shadow milk leaning down to their shoulder and whispering something before they passed out.
bestie you are literally tickling my silly brain right now, also i may have diverged from the prompt a bit and just made the thing a whole little fic instead of a prompt like I'm supposed to be doing.
Request Prompt #8 - 💓
Reader is fem btw, popping this one under a cut because it is LONG
.
" Princess- No, Reader Cookie. Do you even realize how foolish you're being right now?" Your best friend and private advisor warned as they followed you around your room. " You father explicitly forbade you from going to the ball tonight! if he recognizes you there then I fear you may never leave your room again!" " He can't just expect me to miss out on every important social event until he deems me 'worthy enough to be queen'!" You argue back, already grabbing your masquerade mask and dress. " Besides, my mask is enchanted! There's no way he'll know it's me." You said, holding up your supposedly enchanted mask. " I wasn't aware of how far you planned this... to even sneaking out to purchase a dress for the ball beforehand." Your advisor mumbled in an exasperated manner, you simply just nodded along with their words. Truthfully, you'd gotten the dress and mask as a secret gift upon your windowsill one day. you'd originally planned to sneak out as a waiter... but actually partaking in the festivities sounded a lot more fun. " Oh calm down Crab Claw Cookie," You giggled. " It'll all be fine, I'm still a queen-to-be no matter what my father says. I am his only child after all, and it's not like anyone will be marrying him anytime soon." You spoke with a dismissive wave of your hand, you could still feel Crab Claw Cookie's worried eyes upon you, but you'd be fine, right? Plus, there was that odd dream you had a few days ago. A strange, shadowy cookie had appeared in the darkness, offering to give you your freedom in exchange for what you valued most. You had accepted, not thinking much of it at the time, but now that you thought about it... the dress had appeared once you woke up. And then there was the fact he'd said that he'd come to collect the other part of the deal at a later date. You shook your head, you should just continue to get ready. You have a night of freedom to attend to!
-✢-
The ball was in full swing, and yet here you were sitting off to the side. Why weren't you on the dance floor dancing away with the other cookies? Simple, you were completely unprepared for this kind of event! Because of your father and his overbearing nature, he never allowed you to attend any social events when you were younger. You must have gotten so used to your isolation that you had no idea how to actually interact with real people...! Crab Claw Cookie's social interaction simulations paled in comparison to the real thing... And maybe you were scared of your father noticing and recognizing you in the crowd. In short, you were completely lost. " Oh?" You here a voice speak, and looking next to you you can see a Cookie in quite the fancy blue and black suit, his white and blue haired mostly combed back into a sophisticated style while some covered his left eye. The eye that was uncovered was a rather nice shade of blue, like the ocean illuminated by the light of the full moon, or perhaps a blue moon? The mysterious cookie smiled at you, and you took note that it was rather cat-like. " What's a lovely girl like you doing over here on your own? Shouldn't you be having fun and dancing like the rest of the cookies here?" He asked with a tilt of his head, the playful grin never leaving his face for a moment. You hesitated before you let out a sigh, deciding to air your grievances to the stranger. Because isn't everyone a stranger at a masquerade ball? And yet, there was something familiar about him... " It's just that... I've never had the chance to go to a proper ball before. And now that I'm here, I have no idea what to do..." " Is that so?" The cookie mused with a hum, soon extending his hand after a moment. " Well, why not come dance with me? I can show you the ropes if you don't know how~" He offered, his expectant gaze imploring you to take his hand. So, and almost without question, you place your hand in his. Letting him lead you to the dance floor. The waltz was pretty simple, the music changing to signify that the current song was meant to be waltzed to. You knew how to waltz, but you still let him take the lead despite the fact that you( if only slightly) were the taller of your pair. It wouldn't hurt to strike some quiet conversation, right?
" It's so... odd." You mutter, your soft words having caught the ear of the cookie you were dancing with. " Hm? What is?" He asked, staring up into your masked eyes. Something about his gaze felt as if he were searching your very soul... But that was just a weird feeling, it was nothing. " It's just that..." You look down at your feet, yet a subtle movement from your partner caused you to make eye contact with him once again. " Who are you? I feel like I've seen you somewhere before..." You mumbled to the amusement of the other. " My dear Little Star, are we not at a masquerade ball? We aren't supposed to know who the other attendees are." He said with a chuckle, leading you further into the dance. You felt like you've heard someone call you that before, but where? You aren't sure. Are you even dancing anymore? It feels more like you're being puppeteered. You took a quick glance around, you weren't sure if the people watching you were anything more than shadows. " Princess," your partner begins, and your attention snapped back to him almost instantly like a dog hearing their favorite toy squeak. " You do know that you should keep your eyes on your partner while you're dancing, right~?" He hummed with a light giggle, taking your hands in his own. The music has stopped, in fact, you weren't even sure when it had. The entire ballroom was blanketed in shadows, the people you saw no more than silhouettes painted with glowing blue eyes. You felt like you were dreaming, hell, even your eyelids felt heavy as you continued to sway to the command of your partner. Soon enough, you lost your footing, collapsing into the other cookie's arms as you struggled to stay conscious. You could hear the cookie let out a slow, almost villainous chuckle. " Oh princess~ I've come for your half of the bargain~" He purred into your ear, leaving that as the last thing you heard before passing out.
-✢-
" Sire! Terrible news!" A pair of castle knights hollered, interrupting the king's morning. Reader Cookie hadn't even bothered to come down for dinner the prior night, even though he ended the ball early just to make time for her. If she kept up this pettiness then she would never be fit for the role of queen. " Yes?" He gruffly spoke, " Get on with it. Has another rebel group formed to usurp my throne? Is it an escaped Prisoner? It doesn't matter, we can handle all of those things." He said with a dismissive wave of his hand. " You don't understand sire!" The other knight cut in, stepping in front of the first knight. " It's Reader Cookie, she's gone missing!" It was as if a fuse had gone off inside the king's head. " WHAT!?" He yelled, almost spitting out his coffee. " What are you standing around for? Find her immediately! Her misbehavior will not be tolerated in this kingdom!" He barked out the order, with the knights saluting him and immediately running off to get to work. He slumped back into his throne, Reader Cookie was well above the age to know that her behavior was vastly unfit to be queen. Then, he heard it, that witches forsaken giggle that slowly turned into a cackle. " My my! It seems like your little princess has run off, your majesty!" The voice the laughter belonged to said in a mocking tone, with a certain jester stepping out from the shadows. " What a shame, truly!" " Shadow Milk Cookie." The king hissed, glaring at the jester with searing hatred. " You should know that you, nor any of the other beasts, are not welcome in this or any other kingdom!" He hollered, pointing directly at the beast. " Oh, your coldness wounds my heart..." He sighed dramatically, putting a hand over wherever his heart was supposed to be. " But, if you're going to be so rude, then I might as well just... not tell you what's happened to Reader Cookie." He smiled smugly, knowing that the King was falling right into his trap. " You! What have you done to my daughter?!" The king roared with frustration, which only caused Shadow Milk to laugh even more. " I swear, if you've hurt her then-!" " Then what?" Shadow Milk said with a sickening grin. " What will you do, your majesty? You and I both know that you've cared more about your kingdom than you do her, you just want her back because she's the only blood heir to the throne." He cackled at the revelation, and the horror dawning upon the king's face. " But if you want to prove me wrong... Then give up your kingdom, and I'll make sure she's safely returned." He proposed, eyes glinting with delight as he saw the hesitation in the king's stance. Oh how he loved to watch as cookies tried to decipher whether he was telling them the truth or not, not a single one had managed to catch him in a lie before it was already far too late. Such are the perks of practically embodying deceit, he supposed. He turned on his heel, waving goodbye to the king. " I'll give you a day to think it over. Either give up your kingdom and have your daughter returned to you... Or fail her for the last time, and live with the guilt." He left without another word, fading back into the shadows.
#cookie run#cookie run kingdom#cookie run au#cookie run au prompts#crk#shadow milk cookie#cr kingdom#beast yeast#cookie run x reader#shadow milk cookie x reader#in case you're wondering whether Shadow Milk was lying to the king or not... He was telling a white lie#Reader cookie is fine btw. She's chilling in Shadow Milk's domain#might make a continuation later...#might also draw?? from this au?? who knows
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Congrats on 300 folower 🎉🎉🎉 can I request caramel lily it's totally ok if you can't lol btw love the way you write
Thanks so much for the req! This is SO much plot with a bit of porn, I'm not sure what got into me here! Hope you enjoy!
Pairing: Sanji x Afab!Reader
WC: 2100 LOL
Prompt: “I’d eat 10 devil fruits if it meant I could see you naked.”
— —
It was Robin’s birthday, so you and the rest of the Straw Hats were enjoying an evening of drinking and celebrating. Empty bottles littered the dining room table and your captain was asleep and snoring on the deck, distended belly evident of his overindulgence. A few of your crew mates had returned to their quarters, the hour having grown late. You sat at the wooden table with Nami, Zoro, Franky and Robin playing cards while Sanji finished up dishes at the sink. You were all a bit tipsy, some more than others *cough* Zoro *cough* but it was clear the party was winding down.
“I’m not tired yet. What if we made this game more interesting?” Robin made a suggestion and set her hand of cards down on the table.
“*yawn* like a drinking game? I’m in.” Zoro takes another swig from his bottle of sake.
“How about we put real money on the table? I know I’d kick your asses if there was actually something at stake.” Nami suggests.
“I was actually thinking we could play strip poker.” Robin smirks as she makes the lewd proposal.
*WOOOSH*
In what seemed like the blink of an eye, Sanji was somehow squeezed in between Nami and Robin on the dining room bench when he was all the way across the room at the sink not a second ago.
“What an incredible idea, Robin! And it is your birthday after all, so we should all do whatever Robin suggests!” Sanji hurriedly spits out with hearts in his eyes, seemingly out of breath from rushing over.
“Absolutely not. If you think for a second that I’m going to-“ Nami protests.
“Sure, I’m in.” Zoro interrupts her.
“Yeah I’m down I guess.” You chime in, wanting to keep the party going. You had known these people for years now, they were your best friends. Everyone has a body, who cares if they see you naked? What’s the worst that could happen.
“Aww come on, bros! That’s like super unfair! I’ll obviously lose first! This game is rigged!” Franky exclaims while gesturing to his lack of clothing.
“Rigged against who? Perverts?” Zoro cocks his head and smirks.
“Whatever, I’m out. I have maintenance to do on the engine anyway.” Franky excuses himself and heads down into the belly of the ship to finish his tasks.
“Come on, Nami. We can still put real money on it. Well… most of us could, anyway…” Robin smirks as she looks at Zoro hunched over his drink at the other end of the table. “Hey! I have… some.. cash.. somewhere…” Zoro looks in his pockets and inside his sash trying to find some semblance of money.
Nami sighed. She pulls a small stack of berries out of her pocket and puts it on the table in front of Zoro.
“I’ll add this to your tab. I’m going to bed, goodnight guys.” She turns back to Zoro. “Don’t lose it all at once, idiot.”
After Nami exits, the four of you that remained settled your first bets and started the first round of cards.
Much to Sanji’s dismay, he lost the first three hands and has already removed his tie, sport coat and belt while the two beautiful women before him were still fully clothed. Zoro lost the next few, casually shedding his shirt and boots. Eventually, after many more hands of cards and many more bottles of booze, the four of you are all minimally clothed. Robin was winning, still in her bra and skirt. You were sat in your bra and panties, happy that you chose a nicer looking pair to wear today. The boys were both left in their pants.
“Alright, guesshh I’m out…” a very drunk Zoro sighs out as he puts his losing hand down on the table. Wordlessly he stands up and pulls his pants down to his ankles.
“OH MY GOD MY EYES-“ Sanji throws his head down on the table to shield himself from the now fully nude swordsman. “ROBIN? Y/N? AM I BLIND?” Sanji continues to scream towards the floor.
“WHY don’t you wear underwear! That’s gross! I do our laundry!” You exclaim with wide eyes.
“Hmm.” Robin hums. “Carpet does match the drapes.” She raises an eyebrow.
“Screw you guyshhh… I.. I’m going to… to lie downshh…” Zoro stumbles fully naked out of the dining room.
“I’m going to make sure he makes it back to his room…” Robin stands up and dresses herself. Hands sprout from the floor and gather Zoro’s shed clothing and neatly folds it into a pile. Robin grabs the pile and heads towards the door. “… and make sure he doesn’t permanently traumatize Chopper in the process.”
The door slammed closed and you and Sanji were left alone at opposite sides of the table.
Sanji cleared his throat.
“Shall we play on, angel?”
You roll your eyes. You were up tons of berries, there was no reason for you to keep playing, but something urged you to keep going.
“Bring it on, Mr. Cook.” You give him a wink and you could swear your saw a drop of blood spill from his nose.
Perhaps distracted by your tipsy flirting, Sanji loses the next hand and stands up from the table to remove his slacks. He returns to his seat quickly but not quick enough for the large bulge in his briefs to go unnoticed. You smirk. You spot his hands trembling as Sanji pushes his money into the center of the table for the next hand.
“Wow, Sanji, that’s the last of your berries! What if you lose? How are you going to afford cigarettes this week? It’s worth that much to you?” You laugh and take a sip of your drink.
“It’s not the money, angel.” Sanji looks across the table at you with sparkling eyes. “I’d pay any cost. I’d eat 10 devil fruits if it meant I could see you naked.” You couldn’t help but smile at his desperation.
“Well…” You say teasingly. “Let’s play then.”
Your confidence betrays you. You lose the hand.
“Shit!” You throw your losing hand on the table. You rub your eyes with your hand, realizing that you have very little left to remove. The air in the room is different from before. Earlier it had been four crew mates laughing and goofing around, now the air was heavy with tension. It was just you and Sanji, sitting across from each other in your underwear. He was handsome and you found yourself admiring his lithe, slim body. You couldn’t help yourself from becoming aroused.
“Well, fair is fair.” You push the money back towards Sanji and move your hand behind your back to unhook your bra. Your other arm held the cups of your bra in place over your chest as you undid the clasp. You look across the table at Sanji and his mouth was hanging open in anticipation. You aren’t sure why, but you decide to tease him a bit. You use your arm holding your breasts to push them up and together before you let them fall out of your bra, bouncing dramatically.
“Merde, y/n…” Sanji couldn’t pry his gaze from your bare tits.
“We still have one more round to play, don’t we?” You pick up a new hand of cards and hold it with both hands. Doing this, you push your naked breasts together with your elbows, teasing the poor cook further.
“I… Y-yes…” Sanji grabs another hand while shaking himself out of his stupor.
You had four of a kind, there was no way you could lose. You were going to make off with all the money and Sanji’s dignity.
“Royal Flush.”
“What?!” You balk at the cards Sanji had laid on the table. It was his turn to lean back in his seat and smirk. You were speechless. You stared blankly at the table for a few moments before you slide out from your seat on the bench. Sanji watched you intently.
You turn around so that your back is towards him. You hook both of your thumbs into the sides of your light pink panties. You bent forward at the hip, poking your ass closer to Sanji’s face. You slowly, dramatically peel your panties down your bottom, revealing your supple skin inch by inch. Sanji groans as your glistening cunt is revealed to him. You straighten your back and step out of your panties. You turn around.
“Well, Sanji. Looks like you won. I guess you could take the money…” You slink towards him and swiftly hop onto his lap, straddling his trapped erection. You place both your hands on the side of his face to make him look up at you. You gently grind your bare pussy onto his throbbing crotch.
“Or you could have me…” You purr at him, lips almost touching.
Sanji takes no time to weigh his options before slamming his mouth onto yours. His hands fly into your hair, trying to force your lips impossibly closer to his. His tongue forces its needy way into your mouth. You kiss wildly for several minutes before you snake your hand down Sanji’s slender torso and lift your pelvis up so you can free his aching cock from its confines in his silk briefs. You give his member a few slow strokes before Sanji whimpers into your mouth desperately.
“Mmm… Y/n.. please…” Sanji mutters.
You pull away and kiss down his neck.
“Please what, Mr. Cook? I can’t quite understand…” You seductively whisper out. You lick and suck his collarbone as you continue to pump his cock.
“Need you…” Sanji is panting like he ran a marathon, he can’t handle your teasing anymore.
“Need me what, Sanji? Come on… tell me what you need…” You bring your hand that isn’t wrapped around his member up to his chest to tweak and squeeze at his nipple. Sanji lets out a high pitched moan.
“Need to be inside you, please angel, let me feel you…” Sanji grips your hips suddenly and firmly. He could barely form a coherent sentence. You giggled.
“Hm…. Fair is fair…” You smiled as you lifted your pelvis and aligned Sanji’s cock up with your hole before slowly sinking down him. The stretch overwhelmed you at first as you moved your hands up to grip at his shoulders tightly.
“Shit, angel… so tight and wet…” Sanji buries his face in your breasts as you adjust your body to his length.
“Fuck…” You moan softly as you begin to bounce softly on Sanji’s cock. He was thicker than expected, and the anticipation had your body alight with sensation.
“Does it feel nice, my love? Is my cock good for you? Please tell me…” Sanji breaths out as you use him for your pleasure, trying to contain his own release.
“Mmmh…” You let out a moan as you switch from bouncing to grinding yourself onto the blonde’s slim hips. “You feel so good inside me, baby… you’re doing so good for me…” You rub your clit into the base of his shaft as Sanji hits that sweet spot inside of you. You bring your gaze to look into his eyes. Those gorgeous ice-blue eyes stared up at you with what could only be described as adoration and amazement. You saw tears well in his glazed eyes, he was clearly so lost inside the pleasure that was your warm cunt.
“So good…” You continued to praise him. “Gonna cum…” You throw your head back and grip Sanji’s shoulders tighter.
“Please cum on me, angel, want to feel your pussy when you cum, please…” You hear Sanji’s muttering but you were too focused on reaching your peak.
You shriek out a loud moan as your orgasm rolls through your body. You fall forward into Sanji’s neck and stop your movements as the spasms slow down. Sanji picks up the slack and pumps his hips upwards into yours, finally able to let go.
“Fuck, love, I’m cumming!” Sanji slams your hips down onto his and works his load deep into your cunt with a loud groan.
After you both catch your breath from the intense love-making session you had just experienced in the dining room, you slide yourself off of Sanji’s cock and sit onto the seat next to him. You put your head on his shoulder, feeling exhausted.
Sanji reached for his pack of cigarettes, desperately needing one after his climax. He finds the pack empty. He looks at all the money that is now rightfully yours on the table.
“So…. I might need to borrow a little cash this week…”
#one piece#one piece anime#one piece smut#one piece fanfiction#one piece fanart#one piece live action#one piece netflix#one piece fandom#sanji#black leg sanji#vinsmoke sanji#one piece sanji#sanji x reader#roronoa zoro#straw hat pirates#zoro x reader#law x reader
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This has been something that's been rattling around in my head a while and I haven't seen anyone do this yet, so got any HCs for Kenji dating a Vtuber reader?
Well to be honest, when I read that ask I wasn't too sure what to write BUT I did find a few ideas :D I don't really understand the Vtuber concept but I do enjoy people my Cyno and Monarch :) Hope you'll like it and THANK YOU for the request <3 AN: I kind of wrote it more for a streamer than for a VTuber at the end ? I'm so sorry !
He didn't know you were a streamer until you told him. Remember when I said he was protective ? Yeah, when you mentioned you streamed with a camera he wasn't too happy about it. Sure you were your own person, but even he knew Internet was full of creeps and people of all kind honestly. It calmed him down when you told him about your Avatar and explained that nobody really knew how you looked like.
Kenji doesn't really care about games and streamers, but he cares about you ! So when you two decided to move in together, he renovated one of the rooms into your personal office. Taking you to IKEA to pick up furniture turned out to be the worst decision of his life, you spend hours choosing desks and chairs and other cute clutter to fill out the space to your liking. He wouldn't take no for an answer when he told you he'll pay for the stuff, even through you made enough money to afford it. "It makes you happy, right ? Let me make my princess happy." he said and kissed your forehead right then and there.
Whenever you streamed, and he had the time to do so, he would sit in the corner of your newly decorated office and watch you play. Nursing a cup of coffee or tea, depending on the time of day, he would chuckle whenever you lost a game or get scared by a monster in one of the horrors your audience begged you to play.
Speaking of Horror games ! Kenji is a little shit and we all know it, so you can imagine what would happen when you played scary games. Yep, he would scare the absolute shit out of you. One night you finally agreed to playing Phasmophobia with some of your online friends and well...
Your eyes focused on the screen, watching one of your friends place the crucifix on the floor. You were still fairly new to the game but you did know that it would stop the ghost from hunting, at least until it burned. "So what now ?" you asked, your Vtuber following your motions to a T. "Now we need last evidence." one of your co-players responded, his character crouching to pick up the walkie-talkie from the ground. At that moment something fell down from the in game table and it made you absolutely scream. "NOPE I AM OUT OF HERE !" you turned your character and walked towards the door, but it slammed in your face. The ghost started to hunt and from the looks of it it was after you ! "SUCK A CARROT, SUCK A CARROT !" you yelped, trying to run away. You could hear your friends absolutely lose it in the background, as the ghost finally caught up to you. A hand was suddenly placed on your shoulder, and you jump out from your chair so fast Ken didn't even had the time to react. Let's just say your audience started was confused about the sudden bang, and a groan of pain.... and your endless apologies. Nobody could see but you just smacked your wireless keyboard on top of his head from the fright... (BTW ! That Suck a carrot moment actually happened. My friend yelled that dying to a ghost and I thought I might share it with ya'll XD)
Yeah from that point onwards he didn't try to scare you anymore. You felt awful about the incident but some sick party of you was glad you did it, serves him right for scaring you like that. He sported a black eye for weeks after the incident, making tabloids go wild.
Emi absolutely adores your streams. Whenever you play games like Sims or Stardew valley Mina would let her watch it knowing it was friendly enough not to startle her. She was confused as to why the strange character on the screen was speaking with your voice but she still enjoyed the content.
Speaking of our baby girl ! At one point you changed your Avatar and added some stuff representing Emi. Like a Fin-like-Hairclip and a necklace with a K and E on it. Your fans asked questions but you just said you needed a change. Ken was very pleased about the necklace though !
Like any other Streamer you have your own merch, and Ken owns EVERY.SINGLE.PIECE. Limited edition ? He has double of every thing. He absolutely loved the fact you enjoyed your hobby/job so much !
He would totally share a link to your stream on his social. Imagine your surprise when you woke up one day with over 100k followers. Which was strange considering you were chilling at 2k just a few hours before that.
All in all. He would not understand much about your job, but he will support you no matter what. Even if he gets a black eye in the end XD
I'm sorry if it's bad !
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vivziepop: this show is about criticising Christianity"
proceeds to: woobify sinners and make them overlords as a reward,for some reason all or most sinners (cannibals, rapists,murderers....etc) are queer,villainized Adam the first human (had nothing to do with Christianity at the time he got created and it's not his fault that god made him for a woman and just wanted peaceful life with her) who lost two women because of lucifer,made lucifer the good innocent guy (let's ignore that he is the main reason why humanity is suffering), "7 DEADLY SINS ARE GOOD FOR YOU ACTUALLY! LUST IS ABOUT CONSENT AND GLUTTONY ARE ABOUT SELF CONTROL,EXCEPT FOR GREED CAUSE THERE'S NO SUCH A THING AS A GOOD GREED CAUSE FUCK RICH!....btw please buy my Valentino cups! (I Wonder why 7 sins are deadly in a first place if they're caring and healthy according to viv)" "Wait.....are you telling me that stolas is a wise high ranking demon who give knowledge to those who summon him? Nonsense! Stolas is a horny softie who needs his imp slave to protect him! Screw accuracy! And you know what? I am making the rest of ars goetia and turn them into birds and had nothing to do with their demonology because I just need to use their names to make more characters"
(Yeah sorry about stolas accuracy part,it's just that I am tired of "not everything should be accurate" argument,that's like making thoth a Egyptian god of wisdom into a weak softie hypocrite character who is obsessed with sex and have nothing to do with his wisdom and knowledge,actually there's a lot of interesting things about thoth that makes him respected amongst gods and if viv wrote him he would be nothing but a joke character that have no personality outside of sex and victimhood mentally)
Alright lightning round here
Woobifying (idk what that means but i imagine it means glorification) sinners: I think the overlords are there to run businesses and industries in Hell, not to reward them exactly- but I do see the point you're making. The worse they are, the more power they have, which doesn't look too good for Hell's case.
Having most of the sinners be queer: Yeah I.. also get this one. It's weird how no fascists or.. well, generally bigoted people are there, but all the characters that ARE there happen to be queer. And I'm not saying queer people can't be bad, they can, but when there's more queer people than bigots in a place that's supposed to have the bad people... yeahhhhh no
Villainizing Adam: Yeah I hate how they turn Adam into a righteous douche- though it could make sense, since he did eat the fruit too (it probably changed his behavior a lot), turning him into a righteous douche who's bitter he lost his wife was.. kinda messed up.
The characterization of the sins: YEAH ACTUALLY THIS ONE SUCKS !! The whole point of Gluttony is that you just keep indulging without a care- the whole point of lust is that it's forced and it hurts people- if it wasn't about force, it'd be called love. Because consent is love. Force and betrayal (cheating/infidelity) is lust. The sins being characterized as good people takes away from why they are sins.
Stolas: Okay I don't know much about demon stuff, so I'll leave that alone (the ars goetia isn't talked about in Christianity so that's why I can't answer it), but I will say that stolas being the victim all the time is fucking ass. Yes, stolas has been forced into an arranged marriage. That sucks, it does. But that doesn't excuse any of his actions towards Blitzo, or his emotional unavailability towards Via.
I've never gotten this many asks Holy shit
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Hi Gabe! Hope you're well! This one was inspired by this art
There's a statue in the middle of the woods near the village Morpheus lives in. No one knows from where it came nor for how long it has been there, but everyone knows one thing: sometimes, if you ask and you're lucky enough, it can grant you a wish.
Some people believe the statue grants the wishes based on how worthy you are, some believe it's based on how worthy the wish itself is. Some believe it's pure luck, and some believe it's all a load of bullshit, complete coincidence. Morpheus doesn't know what to believe.
He has seen the statue a few times before, when he was still young - it's a plump man, with thick arms, thighs and chest, a belly that rests confortably on his lap, wavy hair that reaches strong shoulders and frames a face that is so beautiful and serene it has made more than one person cry. The man is sat on a boulder and a single piece of cloth wraps his body in gentle folds, and his position makes it seem like he's offering his hands and a conforting smile to whoever is kneeling before him.
He didn't see the statue for years after he left the village in pursue of a life with Nada - that is, before Nada decided she wanted nothing to do with him. Nor did he see it after Alianora, or Killala, or Thessaly. Even Calliope, the one he believed was his soulmate from the moment they locked eyes, had broken their courting.
Too clingy, they said. Always hovering, always wishing to be close, always offering food and disrupting whatever they were doing, until he himself got lost in his drawings and paintings and they couldn't get a hold of him for days, sometimes weeks. Drawings and paintings in which he poured his love for them, only for them to leave before it was finished - and then Morpheus would throw the canvases and sheets of paper in the fire.
The day after Calliope left, Morpheus came back to the village. He haunted his home for days, and then the grounds when he started feeling too empty. He started going farther and farther from the estate each night, until he happened upon the clearing and the statue. And Morpheus let himself believe, just for a single moment.
He kneled before the statue, placed his hands above the man's, looked into his eyes, and wished for someone who would let him love them, and love him back just as fiercelly.
The next day, Morpheus woke up to a man resting on the settee and smiling at him, a single piece of cloth wraping his golden, furry body in gentle folds.
(is this anything? idk lol Have a good day!)
Hmnnnggg yeH this is something. Still haven't played bg3 btw but I still get very excited when I see Gale art. Esp if he gets to have some tummy.
I absolutely love this. First the idea of Dream kneeling in supplication before the statue and just wishing for someone to love! Someone who will stay! Someone who will understand. He feels a little bit silly but it's actually rather comforting, and he stays a long time with his cheek pressed against the statue's thigh. If nothing else, he's released some pent up emotions.
But the next day his life changes forever. The statue is sitting in his house - except it isn't a statue anymore. Its a real, flesh and blood man. With dimpled cheeks and gentle eyes. Dream can't do anything except stare in complete loss and confusion.
"So sorry to barge in." The man says. "But you did make a wish, didn't you? I heard, and I thought... well, I'm sure I could love you in the way that you're looking for."
Dream sits down heavily, with his mouth still hanging open. He doesn't know what he's supposed to say! This man is too beautiful to be true, he's sure that he must be dreaming. How on earth could a statue come alive, and why would he choose to grant Dream’s wish???
"I'll make some tea. I know it's a lot to take in." The man says kindly. "I'm Hob. In case you were wondering."
And he walks off to put Dream’s kettle on the stove, carelessly allowing his fabric covering to shift over his body as it pleases. Dream gulps, staring at Hob’s soft swaying arse cheeks. If this is a dream, then he never wants to wake up!
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So, I noticed that people tend to notice P is not human, not from the way he looks, but from the way he sounds.
I can hear your springs even if you try to hide them. We musicians have a keen ear, you know. (White lady)
I hear the sound of springs inside you... You're a puppet too! (The Survivor)
[btw I'm going to be paraphrasing quotes and details from memory so I can get this out rather rapidly, so my apologies if they're somewhat incorrect]
Claudia and Lucio give no indication that they know about P not being human. Up until mid-game, they only really treat him as another stalker to con. The black rabbit brotherhood seem to know, but mainly because they know we're specifically "Geppetto's puppet."
I think that Claudia and Lucio find out because they either hear the brotherhood during the fight or Simon tells them as much, because Lucio calls us a "goddamn talking rag-doll" before he attacks us if you choose to fight.
The Black Rabbit Brotherhood and their connection to Carlo
And speaking of which - the brotherhood seems to know immediately that we are "Geppetto's puppet". Which makes me wonder... they seem to have known Carlo or known of Carlo while he was alive, which is probably how they put two and two together and guessed the obvious conclusion of how we came to be, which is the case with Antonia:
Oh, I knew you were Geppetto's puppet the moment I saw you (Antonia)
Is that Tenma's boy? > It can't be Tenma's boy. Holy cow, Tenma must have lost his mind (From Astro Boy 2009)
They also have Carlo's painting and the gravesite which is guessed to perhaps contain Carlo's empty grave has the mark of the black rabbit brotherhood on it. Geppetto also says he had no idea the BRB had stolen the painting.
A child who was a blessing to their family lies here. May he rest in peace. (Malum grave)
[Also I'm wildin now but korean pronouns are usually non-gender specific, so maybe it wasn't a "he" originally? this throws a whole bunch of other things into question though which I actually really don't like]
So, I thought of ways that ALL of these things could be true: That this IS carlo's grave in the malum district (which is strange because why would an aristocratic son be buried in Malum), the grave is empty because Carlo's body is still in the suitcase, the brb mark on his grave makes sense, AND the BRB having the painting is more than just a coincidence.
I have the most bizarre headcanon now. The BRB are a bunch of awful thugs for issuing "protection fees", but still, what IF:
They seem very hostile to us, particularly because we are a puppet, but maybe also because of our resemblance to Carlo - not because they resented him, but because Carlo was dear to them somehow. And the empty grave in the district was set up by them privately to commemorate his death when they heard what happened, (and the "family" they are referring to are themselves!). It's also worth noting that in the original story, The rabbits are aligned with the blue fairy (which would be Sophia in this iteration). [They're also associated with coffins and graves.]
I had no idea the black rabbit brotherhood had stolen it. (Geppetto on the painting)
The black rabbit brotherhood! I hate these guys. <- Gemini immediately remembers them. [They also appear very early on in the game, I guess to show they were watching us?]
So maybe their resentment and disgust for P comes from the fact that they know Geppetto has made an artificial replica of someone they knew into something they hated (puppets!), which they would see as repulsive. Perhaps there's an actual reason why the BRB has the painting. What exactly went down at the monad charity house?
...
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[The BRB knowing about Carlo doesn't mean they personally knew Carlo (since Geppetto must've been famous), but it's something. The thing is, both Eugenie and Venigni don't seem to recognize who we're "supposed" to be at all, even Venigni who is said to have been a close colleague to Geppetto. Maybe Eugenie and Venigni are just super polite and don't want to mention Carlo at all to us, but I kinda get the feeling that the public never really knew Carlo existed, Geppetto did dump him off at a boarding school early on after all]
[also also!! the golden stargazer next to the grave for DLC, Carlo being associated with ships, and the DLC showing a nautical theme?]
#look away theres BRB apologia here#lies of p#liesofp#lop#spoilers#lies of p spoilers#carlo#brb#black rabbit brotherhood#pinocchio#theory#more crack theory#speculation#btw i also love that they bring out a coffin for us to get into and WE END UP PUTTING ONE OF THEM IN IT INSTEAD#lore
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okay. i just watched the movie Snakeskin (2001). i bought a physical dvd in the year of our lord 2024 because Taika has 6.5 minutes of screentime in it. and now i'm sitting here trying to process wtf i just watched asjdhfdjsk so here are the highlights (thank you Meow @blakbonnet for going through this experience with me)
first of all, enjoy these screenshots from the trailer (i'm still not sure if they're mandatory disclaimers?):
...but say yes to snake imagery, because there will be a lot of it
we are definitely in 2001. this is extremely apparent throughout the whole movie. but especially from this girl's hair
Taika's character (Nelson) and his girlfriend (Daisy, pictured above) drive around in a repurposed ice cream truck and sell drugs btw. it's called Mr. Trippy.
main character Alice (Melanie Lynskey) is a huge fan of ✨America✨. her best friend is in love with her but she only wants Bad Boys. also said friend's name is Johnny but it's actually Craig
ALSO Craig-slash-Johnny is played by Dean O'Gorman (Fili)??!?!?!?
their hobby is to drive around picking up hitchhikers but only those who look not boring
enter The American. this guy is the most American you have ever seen. americans wish they could be as American as this guy. no one else has ever Americaned harder.
as you can see, i'm not lying. he even says "howdy ma'am" so we're convinced he is a real American
three skinheads are after The American because he stole their drugs (i think). he also stole drugs from Nelson and Daisy, who now owe money and/or drugs to their boss, who also has beef with The American for reasons i'm still not totally sure of
The American not only steals drugs and money, he also has a real gun(!!!) and fucks pretty much everyone?
"darlin'. u gotta earn the raaaiht. ter wear snakeskins 😎"
oh my god the sunglasses emoji just reminded me of the fucking sunglasses oh no i'm not sure i can do this akjsdhjsk this will make sense later i promise
do not learn gun safety from this movie
at one point, there is a whole lotta sheep. we are, after all, in Aotearoa New Zealand. and ok this had the cutest moment of Taika yelling "SHEEPY" out of a car
there's a scene where uhm. uhhh no not gonna describe this i think but. yeah fair warning this movie has some period-typical homophobia let's just say 💀 this is the live reaction:
MOVING ON
if you enjoy the 2000s aesthetic of "look how edgy we are doing drugs" *colorful-haired people on couches in dark club* *echo-y laugh* *hallucinations* *it's mushrooms look it's mushrooms we're doing psychedelics* then this is the movie for you my friend
oh and Alice also did acid at some point while being very "i've totally done drugs before" about it (((doubt)))
GIRL GET UP FROM THAT DIRTY BATHROOM FLOOR
[New Zealand accent] "wow. six and acid." yes she is living all her american dreams as you can see
by nighttime, all three cars (main characters, mr. trippy, and the nazimobile) and the motorcycle (mr. drug boss) have made it pretty far up the mountain, it seems. cute moment between mr. drug boss and nelson. look how :D he is!
but you know a movie with Taika in it needs to have a father figure talk down to him so he gets very 🥺 right after this
lots of shit goes down (i won't spoil too much if by any chance you still want to watch this) and it turns out that the older skinhead guy is the best actor in the movie??
and NOW things get weird
Craig and The American have so much beef by now that they decide to solve it by russian roulette
Alice's reaction to this is something like "ugh, you guys are crazy, i can't watch this 🙄"
like she just walks away?? GIRL THEY'RE AIMING A REAL GUN AT EACH OTHER
she keeps COMPLETELY UNDERREACTING TO WHAT IS HAPPENING like (spoilers from now on) CRAIG IS SHOT AND KILLED and she doesn't even run over and she doesn't even say anything to The American?? WHO SHOT HIM???? he's just standing there??
and then. AND THEN.
ok this is where i fully lost it for several minutes and missed half the following scene. i was fucking HOWLING like actually crying with laughter, i couldn't see or breathe and my partner got worried ksjdhfdjsk ok so here's what happens
they're in the car. craig is obviously very dead. alice is kinda in denial i guess. The American tells her to shut his eyes and she's like why? BECAUSE HE DEAD GIRL!! but she doesn't, she doesn't shut his eyes, no, this is what she does instead
I COULD BARELY MAKE THIS GIF BECAUSE I KEPT LAUGHING TO THE POINT OF TEARS
NOT THE SUNGLASSES ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME. THE UNTAPPED MEME POTENTIAL HERE IS FUCKING RIDICULOUS
ANYWAY shortly after this we hear one of the funniest lines in the movie (and it's not even about the shooting and killing of Craig):
"fuck, Seth! this isn't fucking America, you can't just go around shooting everybody!"
oh yeah The American does have a name and it's Seth
i'll just post a few chat screenshots for the next part because i can't really describe it, i promise we're almost at the end
after some incredible visual effects™️, we end with Return of the Sunglasses (and me scaring my cats away because i was sobbing again)
i haven't even really talked about Taika's scenes much (the reason i watched this in the first place) because the ending took me OUT and honestly he is maybe the most normal person in this whole movie. one review (from the trailer) wrote this:
and yeah that may honestly be the best way to describe it. 10/10 movie watching experience, highly recommend. thank you for coming to my snek talk
#snakeskin (2001)#ida.stuff#🐭📓#anyway if you still wanna watch this movie hit me up lmao#i recommend drinking#but seriously i will go to bed now it's past midnight but i had to get this out#taika waititi
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