#benjy fenwick

[arliedraws]

First War Order of the Phoenix members who were super killed

“Benjy Fenwick, he copped it too, we only ever found bits of him... That's Marlene McKinnon, she was killed two weeks after this was taken… That's Dorcas Meadowes, Voldemort killed her personally... That's Edgar Bones...brother of Amelia Bones, they got him and his family too, he was a great wizard... Gideon Prewett, it took five Death Eaters to kill him…”

[unconventional-lawnchair]

second part of too late?😭😭😭😭 this fic broke me

"Never...

Remus Lupin x Fem!Reader

Summary: True colors are shown from all ends, Remus can't take it

Wc: 4063

Cw: use of {Y/N}, Cussing, fighting, depictions of abusive relationships, Benjy slander(I'm sorry), Drinking and getting drunk, James being a problem

Part one

A few months had passed since that cold night at the Potters’ engagement party, and the world had shifted in ways Remus had never anticipated. He had thrown himself into his work with the Order, using every ounce of energy he had to distract himself from the pain of losing you. But despite his efforts, the ache in his heart remained, a constant reminder of what might have been.

You and Benjy had taken the next steps in your relationship, and while Remus tried to be happy for you, it felt as though he was watching a beautiful sunset. Knowing the night was just around the corner.

Waiting for the moon to taunt him.

If he thought the last three years were torture without you, the last few months being near you was worse.

The love you had for him now belonged to someone else, someone older, someone better, and he was left with the memory of what could have been. Day in and day out, he was reminded of it every time he passed by your proposal photos at the Potters’.

The nights were the hardest. He would lie awake, staring at the ceiling, wishing he could find the courage to reach out to you, to tell you everything he had held back, selfishly hoping it was a front. That you still loved him far more then you'd ever love Benjy. But the fear of intruding on your happiness kept him silent, and he buried himself deeper in his work.

The tension in the air had thickened as news of Voldemort's newest victories began to swirl around them. The Order was on high alert, and every mission felt heavier with the weight of uncertainty.

Benjy’s response to the dangers was to move your wedding day up. He said he wanted to die a happy and married man. You didn't seem to enjoy his joke, but you agreed the sooner the better.

Remus felt a pang of bitterness at the thought, his heart clenching in response to the news. He tried to shake it off, to remind himself that you deserved happiness, that you were moving forward with your life. But the reality of it stung, like salt in a fresh wound. He couldn’t help but feel like he was losing you all over again, and this time, it felt irrevocable.

The wedding was set for a few weeks from now, and the thought of it loomed over him like a dark cloud. Every time he caught sight of you at the Order meetings, laughing with Benjy or sharing a tender moment, it felt like a dagger twisting deeper into his chest. He had to remind himself that it was his fault, that he had let fear dictate his actions, pushing you away when he wanted you more then anything.

With the wedding so close, the rehearsal dinner was moved as well. You had mentioned the idea of just skipping it, but Benjy was determined to celebrate.

It was tonight. And after some coaxing from Lily he made it to the Potter manor.

“So, Benjy, truth or dare?” Lily’s voice filled the room, leaning back against James who stole her drink for himself. Already sloppy off his ass.

The party was rather fun, Remus had to admit. You and him finally managed an air of normalcy. Benjy and you both decided to forgo to typical traditions, turning it into a get together to remind people of the more simple joys in life.

That meant silly drinking games and childish fun.

The atmosphere was lively, filled with laughter and the clinking of glasses, and for a moment, Remus allowed himself to be swept up in it. He watched as you and Benjy engaged with friends, your laughter brightening the room. You looked radiant, your happiness palpable, and it made his heart ache in ways he couldn’t fully express.

“Come on, Benjy! Don’t be a coward. Truth or dare?” Lily’s playful challenge snapped Remus out of his thoughts.

Benjy smirked, leaning back in his chair, clearly enjoying the attention. “Dare.” He said confidently, and Remus felt a spark of unease.

“I dare you to kiss {Y/N}.” Lily declared, her eyebrows wiggling playfully.

The room erupted in cheers and laughter, and Remus felt his heart drop. Sirius, however, booed. “Come on, those two are never NOT kissing! Give em a real one, red!”

Lily laughed and flipped him off with both fingers as Benjy turned to you, wiggling his eyebrows. “My lady?”

You laughed and held out your hand when he asked for it. He took it and kissed up your arm to your shoulder, making you giggle and smile so hard your cheeks hurt. “Benjy!” You scolded when he bit the strap of your tube top. The same dress you wore to the winter formal.

He gave a playful chuckle and kissed your cheek, making you shove his face away with playful disgust.

The energy in the room was electric, a mix of laughter and playful teasing that filled the air with warmth. Remus tried to force a smile, but the sight of you and Benjy together made it feel like a mask, hiding all the turmoil roiling inside him. The way you laughed, the way you looked at him, it was everything Remus had dreamed of sharing with you.

As Benjy continued his antics, leaning in closer to you, Remus felt a deep, gnawing ache in his chest. He tried to focus on the people around him, but his gaze kept drifting back to you. You were everything he remembered and more, the light in your eyes shining brighter than any candle in the room. But with each passing second, it became clearer to him that you were moving on, and he was left behind.

“Alright, alright, I’ll give you a proper kiss,” Benjy announced, clearly enjoying the game. With a flourish, he pulled you in close, his hands resting on your waist. Remus gripped the edge of the table, feeling the tension knot in his stomach.

As Benjy leaned in, you met him halfway, and their lips connected in a sweet kiss that seemed to last forever. The cheers and whoops from the others faded into a dull roar, and Remus felt as if he were drowning in a sea of emotions. The warmth of the room turned cold, and he could hardly breathe.

“See? That’s how it’s done.” He cheeked and kissed your nose, making you smile up at him. Remus didn't even had time to notice how it didn't reach your eyes.

“Alright tough guy, your turn!” James huffed from the love seat cross from them. Remus noticed his tone, it wasn't entirely pleasant and James was clearly struggling to hide it, especially in his drunken state.

Benjy chuckled softly, but his eyes darkened a bit despite his smile. “Alright, James! Truth or dare?”

James gave a simple smile before he shrugged. “Truth.”

“Okay, truth.” He hummed and it was hard not to notice the tension between the two. “Why don't you like me, man?”

Not like him? This was news to Remus. Too observed in self hatred he didn't even notice James fake laughter and false smiles until now.

“Benjy.” You warned softly, pouting at him a bit. Like this was something you had asked him not to bring up. Benjy put his hand on your thigh and gave it a simple squeeze, eyes still on James. “It's alright, babe.” He whispered and you furrowed your brow further.

The tension in the air thickened with every passing moment. He could see the flicker of irritation in James’s eyes, a stark contrast to the carefree atmosphere that had filled the room just moments before. The party was still lively around them, but the bubble you guys had created was terribly tense.

“Why don’t I like you?” James repeated, his voice steady despite the slight slur from the alcohol. “It’s not that I don’t like you, Benjy. It’s just… I don’t know. I guess I just don’t trust you with her.”

Lily smacked his leg and gave a gasp. “James Potter!”

You shifted uncomfortably in your seat, glancing between the two men, clearly caught off guard by the sudden confrontation. “Guys, can we not do this now?” You interjected, your voice soft but firm.

“Yeah, can we just keep this fun?” Remus chimed in, trying to defuse the situation. He forced a smile, hoping to lighten the mood, but the weight of the moment hung heavily in the air.

Benjy's eyes narrowed slightly, the playful demeanor slipping for a moment. “What’s that supposed to mean, Remus?” He asked, his tone edged with defensiveness.

“Nothing! Just… it’s a party, right? We’re supposed to be celebrating, not this,” Remus replied, his heart pounding as he tried to navigate the tension. He could feel the way everyone was suddenly looking at him, as if he were the referee in an unspoken showdown.

“Exactly.” Your voice rose just enough to cut through the thick air. Benjy scoffed and waved you off. Muttering something about you agreeing with Remus. Has Benjy always been so dismissive of you?

You have a shaky sigh and Sirius spoke up, a hesitant smile on his face. “Besides, James is just being a brother, yeah? Protective and shit.”

You gave him an appreciative look. Sirius leaned back and gave you a smile before flashing it to Benjy. James giving a thoughtful drunken look. “Should of seen him at Hogwarts! Didn't want anyone dating his sister. Oh, it was sad to watch.”

“It's not that I didn't want her dating anyone!” James huffed and bit his cheek.

“James, stop.” You snapped, Lily hissing a curse to tell him to just stop talking, but James huffed.

“I just figured it would be Remus.”

The tension in the room escalated, and Remus felt his heart race as he processed James's words. His stomach twisted at the implication, and he could see the discomfort ripple through you. You looked caught between annoyance and embarrassment, your eyes darting between James and Benjy, who was clearly unimpressed with the turn the conversation had taken.

“Seriously, James?” Sirius snapped, eyeing Remus warily.

“You can’t just throw that out there like it’s some kind of joke! This isn’t funny.” Lily continued to scold him and snatched his drink away.

Remus felt a strange mix of emotions surge within him. He felt the weight of James's comment pressing down on him like a heavy stone. He had always been the one who kept his feelings buried, and now the spotlight was on him in a way he had never wanted. Even James had been rooting for him…

Benjy took a deep breath, visibly trying to calm himself. “Look, I get it. You wanted your best friend to be family, I can get that.” His voice was steady, but Remus could see the tension in his jaw. “But she's mine now.” Remus seemed caught off guard by his phrasing. His? “You can't seriously hate me because she loves me and not him, yeah? She loves me.”

“Yeah, but Remus is different.” James insisted, his expression firm. “He’s been in love with {Y/N} since day one. Through all her weird phases. You can’t compete with that, sorry, Benjy.” James continued like a child.

Remus felt heat rise to his cheeks. He could see your eyes widening, the shock evident on your face as you processed James’s blunt admission. You looked between the two men, clearly caught in an uncomfortable position that was only getting worse.

“James, this isn’t the time.” You pleaded, your voice strained. “Can we not make this about Remus?”

Benjy’s grip on your thigh tightened, but he remained calm, trying to diffuse the situation. “I’m not trying to disrespect anyone here, man. But it’s kind of unfair to just hate me for trying to make you sister happy.”

“Yeah, well, maybe it’s unfair for Remus to just stand there and let it happen,” James shot back, his tone defensive. Shooting a drunken glare at Remus who gave him a shocked look. Almost offended. James scoffed and looked back to you. “I’m just saying that if I were in his shoes, I wouldn’t be able to handle watching the love of my life marry someone else, especially when he's an absolute git.”

“James, I think it's time to shut up.” Sirius snapped at James but he didn't falter, James jaw tightening as he noticed you shuffle uncomfortably when Benjy’s grip on your thigh only tightened.

“James, please, just stop talking.” You seethed and he reached for another drink, one Remus was quick enough to snatch from him.

“And what about you, {Y/N}?” James snapped and gestured to you.

“Are you really okay with all of this? With him?” His words hung in the air, charged with an intensity that made everyone shift uncomfortably.

You looked taken aback, your expression a mixture of disbelief and frustration. “What do you mean ‘okay with him’? I love Benjy. What else do you want me to say?” Your voice was firm, but there was a slight tremor in it, betraying the emotions swirling just beneath the surface.

“Do you love him the way you loved Remus?” James pressed, clearly not backing down. “Because it feels like there’s still something still there. Even after three years I've never seen you look at anyone like you look at him!”

“James-” Lily stood and tried to coax him up, trying to excuse her husband before he ruined the night further.

“No! He's like a damn puppy, Lily. He's hurt!” James shouted over his wife and Remus stood up, placing a hand on James chest to push him back against the love seat.

“James. Shut up.” He seethed, finally tired of just sitting around and letting it all happen.

James shoved him back and stood up to challenge him back. Pointing his drunken finger to his chest. “You let her go so easy man! Three years? Three years you left her with this jag off!”

You finally stood up, coming between the two. “James, cut it out! Hes my fiance and I'd appreciate if you'd don't insult him! If you're so unhappy with it you can go!”

“I can go?” James scoffed, gesturing to Remus. “What about him?”

“What do you mean, James? He hasn't done anything!”

“That's my bloody point! He let you go! Now he's just some.. stranger! You guys don't even write anymore!” James whined like some obscene child of divorce. Gesturing between you two with a drunken stumble, trying to stifle a burp. “You two were perfect for each other.” He continued to insist. “What happened?”

You sighed and tried to focus on the fact that James was drunk, he was being stupid, and he wasn't going to see reason easily. “James… I still care about Remus, that won't change.”

Your eyes flicked to said boy but his eyes were focused on the edge of your dress skirt. Noticing the large handprint shaped bruise on your thigh from Benjy’s grip. You quickly covered it.

“But you're marrying him!” James gestured towards Benjy and Remus eventually gave in, falling back on the couch and eyeing Benjy.

“You can't pretend this is some casual fling! You're marrying him! Ring on your finger! You hated big chunky jewelry.” James shouted and you gave a scandalized laugh.

“Fling? James, I know that!”

“Then why?!” He whined like he physically couldn't understand. Like it was impossible; the idea you could want Benjy when you could have Remus. “Mom and dad loved Remus! They would of hated Benjy too! They knew you loved him! And now you're just expecting me to believe you don't anymore!?”

You felt a surge of anger rising within you, fueled by the insistence, unfiltered by your own drinks tonight. “Of course I still do- that doesn't just change, James!” You blurted out, the words escaping before you could stop them.

Silence enveloped the room. You could feel the shock radiating from everyone- the laughter, the playful atmosphere evaporating into thin air. Everyone, your family, Benjy’s family, your friends and coworkers, everyone’s eyes were on you.

Remus’s eyes widened, and for a brief moment, you thought you saw a flicker of hope and disbelief in his gaze.

“Wait- what?” Benjy’s voice was soft, almost broken as he processed your words. Then, came that familiar rage. “You're kidding.”

Everyone was silent. James was staring down at you with a furrowed brow, his lip twitching slightly.

“I didn't hear that.” Benjy scoffed and stood up, tossing his drink across the room and the expensive glass shattered against the hard floor. “I really hope I didn't hear that properly.”

You took a shutter of a breath, trying to hide your wince as you walked over to your fiance and tried to mutter an apology, trying to excuse you two to have a private conversation.

He was having none of it.

“Don’t you dare apologize now!” Benjy shouted, his voice echoing off the walls, drawing the attention of everyone in the room, you could hear a pen drop. He stepped closer, invading your personal space, his eyes blazing with anger. You stumbled back instinctively. “You’ve been playing me this entire time, haven’t you? Telling me you love me while still pining after him! How am I supposed to trust you after that?”

“Benjy, please, it’s not like that.” You lowered your voice, feeling a twinge of panic rise in your chest. You tried to take a full step back, but he reached out, grabbing your arm with a grip that felt too tight, too possessive.

“Not like that?” He repeated, his voice dripping with sarcasm. You could smell the fire whiskey on his breath. He was drunk, you tried to remind yourself, everyone was. “You just told everyone you’re still in love with him! What am I supposed to think? That you’ll marry me and then run back to him the moment things get tough? Are you cheating on me?” He laughed. “With Remus Lupin of all people?”

You could feel the heat of his anger radiating off him, and the fear began to creep in. Trying to ignore the familiar danger in this conversation. Ever since that night on the balcony he was becoming someone you knew, someone he promised he wasn't anymore. “I’m not cheating on you! I chose you, Benjy! You’re the one I want to marry!”

But he pulled you closer, his grip tightening. “Benjy, nothing has happened.” You whispered, insisting, as you tried to pull him along with you.

“Please. Not in front of everyone.” You whispered again. You could hear James curse, turning to watch as Sirius got between you and your brother. The drunken idiot looked ready to kill Benjy.

“Not in front of everyone?” Benjy laughed, his voice rising again, anger bubbling. “You think that’s going to change how I feel right now? You think I care about what anyone else thinks when my fiancée just declared her love for another man?”

His grip on your arm was painful, and you tried to pull away, but he only tightened his hold. You slowly closed your eyes. Not hearing Lily shouting at James as she dragged him out, James complaints and verbal threats about Bengy’s behavior not even reaching you, Lily fully trusting the boys to deal with it. Not noticing how Marlene and Mary began to escort people out of the house.

Much to Benjy’s drunken berating.

“Benjy, please.” You pleaded, desperation lacing your tone. “I’m not cheating on you. I love you. I am marrying you. Like we promised, yeah?”

But Benjy's expression twisted into something dark, a mixture of hurt and fury. His teeth gritting. “You think that’s enough? You think just saying you love me is going to erase what you just said?” He stepped closer, his voice dropping to a low, menacing tone. “You’ve put me in a position where I can’t trust you. You think I can just ignore this? That I can pretend it doesn’t hurt? You humiliated me.”

“I'm only going to tell you to back up once.” Sirius’s voice cut through you two, sharp and commanding. He stepped forward, positioning himself between you and Benjy, his expression full of pure rage.. “How about you put your hands on a man your size, huh?”

“Sirius…” Remus warned as he walked up behind you.

Benjy’s eyes flicked to Sirius, a flash of defiance crossing his face. “Stay out of this, Black! This is between me and her.”

“No, it’s not just between you two anymore,” Sirius shot back, unwavering. “You don't get to touch my sister like that.”

You could almost smile at the comment. Sirius’s declaration; you wondered if your dad would be proud.

He'd surely be disappointed in you.

“Touch her?” Benjy’s voice dripped with disdain. “She's my wife. She’s the one who made a fool of us!”

“Benjy-” You started before you felt Remus’s hand rest on your shoulder, slowly running down to rub the tender spot Benjy had just been manhandling. When your eyes met Remus’s there was something so reassuring, so soft.

“I didn't mean for this-”

“Just stop talking.” He hissed and before Sirius could ball up his fist Benjy spoke again.

“Give me my ring. I'm done with you.” He snapped and you winced. Carefully taking the gem off and handing it to Sirius. Who then, like an asshole, tossed it across the room.

“Go fetch.” He hissed and Banji scoffed, eyes still on you.

“I knew you were a waste of my time.” He spat harshly, “The second you showed your real colors. You right bitch-”

You had never seen Remus move so quickly in your life. Your mouth have a horrified sound as you watched Remus’s fist collide with Bengy’s face.

The impact echoed in the room, a sharp crack that momentarily stunned everyone into silence; everyone who was left to watch the pathetic scene. Benjy staggered back, clutching his nose, blood beginning to trickle down his face and from in between his fingers. The room was caught between shock and disbelief, all eyes turning towards Remus.

“Don’t you dare speak to her like that.” Remus growled, the anger radiating off him dangerously. He felt everything, jealousy, rage, regret, anger. Guilt- guilt that he even let this happen. That a man as disgusting as Benjy had somehow fooled you- and Remus had let it happen.

He would let a lot of things happen for your happiness, but he would do a bloody lot more for your honor. If that meant bloodying his knuckles that was fine. He would do what James said, he'd fight for you.

You covered your mouth in stunned silence but Sirius just gave a wicked smirk. You turned to glare at Sirius and he shrugged without a lick of regret.

Remus stood firm, fists clenched at his sides, as he watched Benjy stumble back, the realization of what had just happened settling in. You could see the fury in Remus's eyes, a fierce protectiveness that sent a rush of conflicting emotions through you.

“Remus, you-”

Benjy regained his footing, wiping the blood from his nose with a look of utter disbelief mixed with rage. “You think that makes you a hero?” He spat, his voice low. “Trust me, half breed, she ain't worth saving.” Sirius stepped in this time, but Remus was the one to hold him back. A hand to his chest.

Benjy and Remus held eye contact before Remus’s eyes flickered to the door. Benjy scoffed before he began to leave, leaving the ring in the center of the shattered glass.

Everything crashed over uou as you watched him leave. Was it relief? Grief? Yearning? You wanted to run to him but you wanted to curse his name. You wanted to take the ring back but also wanted to throw it into the black lake and forget about it. You finally broke down, covering your face in shame as Sirius sighed and Remus quickly turned on his heels to pull you into a hug. Suddenly as soft as a teddy bear.

Sirius slowly sighed and ran his fingers threw his long hair. “James is going to kill him.” He mumbled before he turned to face you two. He cooed and walked over, rubbing your back as you came undone.

[auntiejohn]

marauders era incest map!!

inspired by heartbreak high

made by me😜

[enbysiriusblack]

people with crushes on one of the marauders know they've gotta befriend the others first or they'll never get further than a hookup.

leading to a bunch of people being overly nice to all of them. benjy fenwick complements james after every quidditch match. sybill trelawney offers free readings for all of them. hestia jones shouts at people for calling remus 'loopy'. lily evans goes a bit of a different direction (although much more efficient than the others) by tackling sirius to the ground and calling him a git

[mrstellmeafuckingsecret]

an incomplete list of people who had a crush on sirius

james potter

evan rosier

remus lupin

peter pettigrew

barty crouch jr.

marlene mckinnon

mary macdonald

benjy fenwick

rabastan lestrange

voldemort

dumbledore

harry potter

bill weasely

ginny weasely

[sebbianas]

you just know james, sirius, and remus spied on peter and benjy’s first date with stupid disguises like big fake mustache and shit like that

peter just apologizing and benjy just laughing and telling him its all good he thinks its funny

[blueironywrites]

Title: Illusion

Rating: PG

Word count: 268

Summary: Remus goes on a date. Sirius is not pleased.

May prompts from @wolfstarmicrofic. Chosen prompt: fake date

===========

Remus looked at Benjy's smiling face in confusion.

"You want to go on a date? With me?"

Benny laughed. "Am I so bad?"

Remus hesitated. "I don't know," he said, doubtfully. "I just..." am in love with someone else, he finished silently.

"Look," Benjy said. "We're friends, right?" At Remus's nod, he continued. "So it won't be a total bore. Plus," he said, playfully as he started walking backwards down the corridor, "It may get Black off his arse to actually do something."

Remus started. "Wait... Benjy, wait, what?" he called.

"I can't hear you!" came Benjy's voice as he turned and walked away, his voice full of laughter.

+++

"Has he seen us yet?"

Remus looked up from the menu at Benjy and frowned. "Has who seen us?"

Benjy sighed loudly and rolled his eyes. "Merlin, you're hopeless," he said, affectionately.

Benjy leaned back in his chair, looked around and smiled wickedly after seeing something in the corner behind Remus. Benjy reached out to clasp Remus's hand, stroking his thumb over the knuckles.

A loud crash came from the corner behind Remus followed by a chair scraping across the floor and Benjy laughed out loud. "Oh, yes," he said, grinning. "He's definitely seen you now."

"Moony?" came a familiar voice behind him.

"Right," Benjy said, standing up. "I'll leave you two to it." Remus hardly noticed as he walked away as he turned around to meet a pair of familiar grey eyes.

Remus and Sirius stared at each other for a long moment before Remus smiled softly.

"Hi," Remus said.

Sirius also smiled, equally softly. "Hi," he repeated.

[swag696942069]

Marauders fake tweets Fame AU part 4

[moonytoasted]

marauders era sexuality headcanons

james potter: unlabeled. he had a crush on frank but it didn't compare to his crush on lily. he can't be bothered to label himself.

remus lupin: gay gay gay

sirius black: bi. can pull every gender and does. him and marlene were each others' first kisses.

peter pettigrew: demiro + demisexual :3

hestia jones: she loves her nerd boyfriend

amos diggory: he loves his strong quidditch girlfriend

lily evans: bi. dated emmeline vance (for like 3 days before they broke out in a screaming match. enemies to lovers speedrun)

marlene mckinnon: lesbianest lesbian to ever live. her, emmeline, and sirius combined have probably flirted with everyone in gryffindor.

mary macdonald: bi (and married dean thomas' dad rahhh)

dorcas meadows: bi/ace :3

emmeline vance: lesbian. or alternatively, sapphic enemies to lovers plot point.

regulus black: thought he was aroace. turns out he's demiro + ace

barty crouch (jr): evan. / evan: barty.

davey gudgeon: straight, acts gay w his friends

sybill trelawney: bi w a HEAVY preference for women.

xenophilius lovegood: straight. #1 ally

pandora: ace + straight but made out w sybill when they were high.

frank longbottom: bi + the crush of every new first year coming in

alice fortescue: straight + the crush of every other new first year.

caradoc dearborn: benjy. in love w him but not out :(

benjy fenwick: bi. he's out.

[witchygfsgf]

how i imagine the marauders (picrew is made by makowka)

sirius black

remus lupin

peter pettigrew

james potter

lily evans

mary macdonald

marlene mckinnon

dorcas meadowes

pandora lovegood

xenophilius lovegood (my hc is he's a trelawney)

sybill trelawney

alice longbottom

frank longbottom

emmeline vance

emma vanity

lucinda talkalot

amelia bones

edgar bones

hestia Jones

benjy fenwick

charity burbage

aurora sinistra

bellatrix black

andromeda black

narcissa black

ted tonks

rita skeeter

persephone zabini (first name's just a hc)

regulus black

[atlasdoe]

THE HOGWARTS CLASS OF 1978 - pt 27

EMMELINE VANCE

Name - Emmeline Vance

Blood status - Halfblood

Date of Birth - 26th August 1960

House - Ravenclaw

Academic achievements - Prefect, Part of the Slug Club

She fought in both wars and was killed after being sold out by her own side. She left behind her Muggle wife and step daughter

Canon

Was apart of the first and second Order of the Phoenix and the Advanced Guard

Was killed by Death Eaters near where the Prime Minister lived during the second war during the second week of July 1996

Her death was considered a significant and devastating loss for the Order and her murder was published in Muggle newspapers most likely because of the place of her murder being so close to the Prime Minister

Severus Snape claimed to have given information to Voldemort that led to Emmelines death

Headcanon

Pansexual

Her patronus was a robin

Her boggart was letting herself be corrupt with magic

Her middle name was Grace

Was the older sister to Finn and Jude Vance

Grew up in Birmingham

Her father, Patrick never told her mother, Rebecca that he was a wizard after he found out during their third date that witchcraft scared her. He knew that the right thing to do was either come clean there and then or cut things off but he had already fallen in love and was scared of her leaving. In the end he decided to keep it a secret and live the rest of his life as a Muggle for her

When they had Emmeline and her brothers, Patrick had hoped that they had been Squibs but by the time Emmeline was 5 it was becoming clear that she was a witch

Eventually Patrick had to come clean and tell Rebecca the truth hoping that her love would be greater than her fear but unfortunately he was wrong. Rebecca left that night and took all of her belongings with her, ignoring her children's quiet voices as they asked her where she was going

All Emmeline’s mother left was a polaroid camera which Emmeline kept and took with her almost everywhere. Nobody was allowed to touch her camera a part from her brothers but even their time with it she would limit out of fear of them breaking it

Emmeline grew up in Birmingham, England. Her father was studying to become a teacher before her mother left but after she was gone he decided to go back to the wizarding world and got a job as an independent tattoo artist. It was something he always wanted to do growing up and decided to give it a go while he was reimagining his life. His business was a success and he managed to earn more then he ever would as a Muggle teacher

Emmeline adored her father but she longed for her mother. The fact that her reasoning for leaving was because of magic made her resent it in some way. She fantasised about a alternate life where she was never a witch and could live happily with her family all together

Emmeline, Finn and Jude all still went to a Muggle primary school because their father wanted them to stay somewhat like their mothers children. Even after she abandoned them he still loved her

One time when Emmeline was 8 all of the girls in her class began coming into school with their hair in braids and not wanting to feel left out Emmeline asked her dad if he could braid her hair. When he attempted to the next morning it was awful but Emmeline didn’t care and went into school with it like that anyway, proud of her dad for trying. That morning all of the girls made fun of her for how her hair looked and her teachers made her take it out and brush it again because it didn't look “presentable.” Emmeline burst out crying when her dad asked her what happened to her hair when he picked her up

Finn had seen all of this happen and the next day went to the girls in his class and asked them to teach him how to braid hair. The next morning he surprised Emmeline by braiding her hair almost perfectly (one of the girls had given him one of their dolls for him to practise on) and from then on Finn would always braid Emmeline’s hair for her

Emmleine didn’t grow up knowing any magical kids so when she started Hogwarts she was all alone and was too scared to ask anyone if she could sit with them

Aurora Sinistra found her standing by herself outside of her compartment and invited her to come in

Emmeline accepted and there she met Emma Vanity, Septima Vector, and Florence Greengrass who were all sharing the compartment with Aurora

Emmeline didn’t talk much during the train ride unless she was spoken to but near the end had come out of her shell a little more as the girls were able to settle all of her worries that she originally had about the school

During the sorting ceremony the Sorting Hat had no problem putting her in Ravenclaw. She wasn’t surprised as her father told her before leaving that she came from a family of Ravenclaws

Emmeline spent the majority of the start of term feast having small talk with her other fellow Ravenclaw first years and Millicent Bagnold, who had recently became one of Ravenclaw’s prefects. Aurora and Septima also moved their seats down to sit next to her during the feast and welcome her into their house

On the first night Emmeline and her other Ravenclaws, Marlene McKinnon, Hestia Jones, Sybill Trelawney, Kingsley Shacklebolt, Gilderoy Lockheart and Alexander Steddings, all sat together on the floor by the fire and played 21 questions as some of the older students occasionally came over to introduce themselves

The relationship between the Ravenclaws of the class of 1978 was always a tricky one. They all acted like cousins who couldn’t stand each other during Easter but loved each other during Christmas. They got into arguments frequently and Flickwick would often have to gather them all in his office to talk things out

One time in their second year, during a potions lesson things got so heated between the 7 of them that spells started shooting and as punishment Flitwick made them all do team building exercises for an entire Saturday afternoon

Emmeline herself didn’t really find a problem with her classmates. She respected Kingsley and Alexander, she loved having conversations with Sybill and as annoying as he was Gilderoy made her laugh a lot (even if it wasn’t intentional) Hestia had always been a sore subject but she didn’t hate the girl. And Marlene was and always will be Emmeline’s literal soulmate

The love Emmeline had for Marlene she will never have for anyone ever in her life. The two of them were twin flames, two peas in a pod, the strawberries to her cream, inseparable and above all, best friends

The majority of the time, Emmeline’s involvement in the Ravenclaws arguments was her blindly taking Marlene’s side no matter what

There were many people at Hogwarts who thought that Marlene and Emmeline were dating until Marlene started dating Dorcas Meadows in their sixth year. Although Emmeline was Marlene's first kiss and they did lose their virginity to each other in their fifth year

The only problem with Marlene (and it was only a tiny tiny small problem) was that Marlene despised Hestia and Hestia despised Marlene. Therefore the girls' dorm room always seemed a bit divided. Emmeline and Marlene on one side and Sybill and Hestia on the other

Now, if Emmeline had had her pick of course she would have chosen for everyone to get along as that’s just who she was. But, no matter what she would always pick Marlene. It could be them against the world and she wouldn’t even think twice

Emmeline became somewhat of a social butterfly during her times at Hogwarts. She soon became her years “IT girl” although she never actually knew that herself

She only thought it was manners, saying hello to your classmates and asking if they’re alright, making sure that someone wasn’t feeling left out, offering sweets to someone as a way to extend a hand in friendship, but soon it was becoming clear that Emmeline seemed to be friends with everyone

She wasn’t friends with everyone of course. Her real friends (outside of her own house) consisted of Lily Evans, Frank Longbottom, Pandora Lovegood and Benjy Fenwick

Pandora she met through Marlene (as at this point she wasn’t just comfortable around people she didn’t know yet)

Emmeline met Lily Evans properly during the summer of 1975, right before their fifth year at Hogwarts

Emmeline had known of Lily beforehand and knew her to have mutual friends but they had never had a conversation 1 on 1

They met while both of their families were visiting Diagon Alley in the late June and started talking

In early July Lily invited Emmeline to one of her sisters friends house parties and white there they kissed for the first time

Long story short they had a summer fling

When school started back up again in September Lily was hoping for them to be in a relationship but Emmeline was confused about her sexuality. She thought there were only two options, gay or straight, and she knew that she was attracted to men so thought of her feelings for Lily as nothing but a phase. So when Lily asked her out she turned her down

Her feelings for Lily eventually faded and they remained friends but not seeing what could've happened with Lily would always be one of Emmelines biggest regrets. She didn't start exploring her sexuality more until after the war

Emmeline also met Edgar Bones through Marlene when she was in her first year and he was in his second

Emmeline had always found Edgar attractive but for the first two years of knowing him brushed it off hoping she'd grow out of it

During these two years Edgar would try to make Emmeline comfortable by trying to joke around with her

Emmeline started to realise her true feelings for Edgar during her sixth year when she ran into him on her way to Marlene's house on Christmas eve. He had just gotten into an argument with his parents and left his grandparents house early, but was locked out of his own house. Seeing how upset he was, Emmeline stayed with him and he opened up to her about his problems with his family and expectations. In return, Emmeline told him about her own problems with her mother

Eventually Amelia Bones showed up and took over in comforting Edgar and Emmeline continued her journey to the McKinnons

The first thing Emmeline told Marlene when she walked through the door was that she was in love with Edgar

During her sixth year and his seventh Edgar came up with the theory that he only catches the snitch during games where Emmeline was present and even made a table of the games he played the year before as evidence for this theory. He therefore stated calling Emmeline his lucky charm and insisted that she had to go to all of his games so he could win

Because his theory started to seem true Marlene banned Emmeline from going to the finale Quidditch match between Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff in 1977. However, during that game Marlene fell off her broom and suffered a career ending injury (it turns out that Emmeine was Marlene's lucky charm and not Edgars)

While Emmeline and Edgar were both waiting to see Marlene in the hospital wing they confessed their feelings for each other and kissed. When Emmeline made a joking comment about how they were making out while Marlene was in the hospital Edgar replied with how Marlene was probably all over Dorcas in that moment so it was only fair that they got to kiss also

When they got to see Marlene and told her that they had kissed she said that it was the only thing that made her feel better (she was mostly just happy that she didn't have to keep the secrets of them liking each other anymore)

When Edgar left Hogwarts and joined the Auror training program they stayed together throughout Emmelines last year at Hogwarts and kept in touch by sending letters to each other and meeting up during Hogsmead weekends

Before we get to the depressing shit here's some random headcanons

Her favourite drink was hot chocolate

For her 16th birthday Benjy got her a record player but she could never trust herself to not scratch the vinyl so she would get Marlene to turn it on for her

Emmeline was considered tall when she was younger but by the time fourth year came around everyone seemed to have overtaken her in height. She said that the day she realised Marlene was taller then her was the worst day of her life

Emmeline and her family loved Muggle sports, particularly football. They supported Aston Villa and one time wore her Villa shirt to a Quidditch match just to piss off Marlene

During their seventh year Marlene and Emmeline decided to play matchmakers and tried to get Tommy (Marlene's younger brother) and Jude together. (and it worked, though Tommy and Jude would always deny that their sisters had anything to do with it)

Marlene once convinced Emmeline to read Little Women but Emmeline never finished it. When Beth died Emmeline threw the book across the room and vowed never to read a book again

She would send little handwritten notes to people via magical paper robins

She would always say she didn't want children but really she just didn't want to get pregnant

She was scared of clowns

She was incapable of having a casual drink. It was either all or nothing

She would call people “dude” and “bro” unironically

Whenever she played Quidditch for fun she would play as seeker

She had the messiest handwriting ever

She and Edgar had many museum dates even though neither of them knew anything about art

When Emmeline graduated she started a healing internship at St Mungos

She later joined the Order of The Phoenix

While with the order she became their unofficially healer and would always be the one people turned to when they needed medical attention

Whenever Edgar was at St Mungos and needed taking care of he would always insist that it was Emmeline to do it despite the fact that she was only a trainee. He did this for two reasons, 1) because he was usually in a lot of pain and trusted her and wanted her close and 2) so that she had the opportunity to prove herself infront of her superiors

Eventually everyone else in the Order started to do the same and would only want to be treated by Emmeline if they were ever in St Mungos. It got to the point where once Sirius Black created a scene at Mungos demanding to be seen by Emmeline without realising that Emmeline was in the bed next to him being treated herself

One time for a mission Emmeline was paired up with Sirius to be a lookout for any suspicious behaviour in a town where suspected Death Eaters were living. They were on the stakeout for 24 hours and in that time they managed to 1) Emmeline taught Sirius how to use her camera 2) Sirius told literally everything he loved about Remus 3) They layed 5 games of wizard chess (which neither of them was good at) 4) Sirius had convinced Emmeline to start listening to Queen by continuously singing Don't Stop Me Now and 5) When Emmeline fell asleep Sirius tried to see how many objects he could place on her without waking her up

When Marlene was killed on the 14th July 1981 with her family Edga made sure that he told Emmeline first (as he was the one who found them)

Marlene's death was the hardest thing Emmeline had every had to go through. She shut down completely for a while and only came back to her senses after talking to Benjy about it

During the McKinnon's funeral Emmeline got really drunk and refused to leave the wake, because once the funeral was over that meant that Marlene's death isn't “new” anymore and she really did have to go on without her best friend

During the war and especially this time Edgar started drinking as an escape and would go in and out of himself a lot. He would go from drowning himself in work trying to end the war to drinking and locking himself in his room when things got too much

On the 2nd of September 1981 Jude, Finn and their dad attended the Sunderland v Aston Villa football game. Death Eaters attacked the stadium during half time and all three of them died along with 7 other wizards who were there and 20 muggles were killed

The next day, after a week-long mission, Edgar was found barely alive with Fabian and Gideon Prewett. The Prewett twins were both already gone by the time they were found

Emmeline was settling into her new room in the Orders headquarters when she was called into St Mungos, before Edgar even woke up

Emmeline didn't even have any time to begin mourning her father and brothers before she had to comfort Edgar over not only the large amount of pain he was in but also the death of his two best friends. Emmeline was also given the task of having to tell the Prewett family that Fabian and Gideon were both dead (as the families were contacted and told that only one of the three survived, but wouldn't tell them who lived until they were stable)

Emmeline decided not to tell Edgar about her family's death but he eventually found out quickly when Dumbledore mentioned it to him

From then on it was a constant back and forth between them of trying to look after each other while not falling apart themselves

Edgars drinking was getting worse by the day and Emmeline was pulling her hair out by the fact that she couldn't just fix it

When they started taking their grief out on each other, Emmeline decided that they both needed a break from each other at least until the war was over. Edgar didn't want to break up but agreed

They both were under the impression that they would eventually get back together

Neither of them took the break up well and in late September 1981 Edgar told Emmeline that a week before he had gotten too drunk and slept with a Muggle women called Elizabeth who he got pregnant

Edgar also told her that she was currently staying in one of the Order's safe houses while she decided if she wanted to keep it or not. He had decided that if she wanted to keep it he wouldn’t leave her to raise their child alone

Emmeline didn't know how to feel, but she still loved him and she knew that he still loved her. They both wanted to make it work, so she was willing to try. They just had to wait until the war was over

A few weeks later word got out about Elizabeth to the death eaters and they attacked her house, Elizabeth saw them coming and called Edgar before she was killed. Edgar rushed to the house but the Death Eaters were waiting for him. He was killed before he could even fully open the door

Sirius was the one to pull the short straw and was the one to tell Emmeline. She was the last in the Order to be told

After Emmeline is told she goes to the Bones house to check on Amelia. When she gets there Amelia (who is very upset and angry) lashed out on her and told Emmeline that it's her fault that Edgar died because if she didn't break up with him then Edgar would've never slept with Elizabeth and he wouldn't have died

(Really Amelia knows that it's unfair to blame Emmeline when she's grieving just as much but she just lost her twin brother so cut her some slack)

Emmeline took Amelia's words to heart and ended up blaming herself for his death

When the war ended Emmeline went to the Leaky Caldron to “celebrate”

By now her training at St Mugos had finished (she had finished early due to her part in the war) and she was given until the New Year off before she started properly

On the 23rd of December 1981 Emmeline went for drinks with Pandora, Kingsley, Hestia and Xenophillius where Emmeline and Hestia got into an argument about the war

On the 1st of January 1982 Dumbledore asked Emmeline to meet him to ask her two favours. One being to look after Remus after the full moon (because she is a talented healer and a familiar face (this was also the first time Emmeline was told about Remus being a werewolf she didn't know before) and to spend some time with Snape and keep an eye on him to either make sure that he doesn't turn back to the death eaters or to make him feel more welcomed on their side

Emmeline agrees to both of them and starts to spend more time with Snape and Remus

Remus allowed Emmeline to heal him but didn't really try to become friends with her

Snape had already known that Dumbledore was going to send someone to monitor him before Emmeline had showed up at his door. They had a quick conversation which ended short when Emmeline called bullshit on his excuse for joining the Death Eaters

Snape told her that if she wanted to leave and not see him that he wouldn't tell Dumbledore. So Emmeline leaves and doesn't contact him again until 1984

Remus eventually started warming up to Emmeline and the two began to become friends

During that time Emmeline also started seeing a therapist

She had major trauma when it came to being in the hospital. By the end of the war she had forgotten that being a mediwitch used to be what she wanted to do for a career and not just a side gig while the war was on

Being in St Mungos reminded her too much of the war and she was beginning to realise that she had lost her passion that she once had. The only reason why she stayed was because she didn't have a backup plan

In 1984 Frank went missing and Alice showed up at Emmelines door asking for help. Along with Kingsley and Remus, Emmeline suggested going to Snape to see if he knew anything. Snape told them that he knew where Bellatrix was currently staying but when Alice said that they should go straight away they all tried to convince her to sleep on it and let them get more information

Alice did not listen and while everyone was sleeping she left to go after Frank

Emmeline, Kingsley, Remus and Snape all went to Bellatrix’s once they realised she was gone but by then it was too late and Frank and Alice were already gone

Also in 1983 Emmeline attended Pandora and Xenophillius wedding

While there she ran into Amelia, who was the maid of honour

Amelia did end up apologising for what she said after Edgar died and told Emmeline that it wasn’t her fault but even though Emmeline does forgive Amelia she doesn't forgive herself and continues to blame herself for Edgars death until the day she dies

During the wedding is also when they find out that Barty Crouch Jr was part of the group of Death Eaters to torture Frank and Alice

In December 1986 Dumbledore contacted Emmeline, Remus, Severus and Gilderoy and asked them to do a mission for him in New York. They all reluctantly agree

On the 30th of January 1987 they all move to New York and start living together in an apartment in Brooklyn

The American Minister of Magic feared that a similar uprising as Voldemorts may be happening behind the scenes in the MACUSA and their mission was to help prevent it

Bunch of shit happens over this year including them all meeting an American Warlock and helping him save a village from werewolves. The night before they succeed in helping the warlock, Emmeline receives a letter from Pandora telling her about the Horcruxes and Regulus’ plan. In Pandora’s letter she tells Emmeline that she’s beginning her trial and error run for a spell that can destroy the Horcrux and is telling Emmeline in case something goes wrong and Emmeline has to finish the job for her. Emmeline burns the letter as instructed to and after they save the village Gildeory obliviates all of them, erasing Emmelines memory of the letter

While in New York Emmeline also ran into Mary MacDonald. When the two first saw each other they got into an argument because Emmeline was told by Marlene that Mary would be coming back to the wizarding world after the war was over and that’s why she joined the Order. When Mary told Emmeline that her plan was to never come back Emmeline yelled at her and told her that Marlene died for nothing

Emmeline and Mary have this whole arc

By the time it’s December 1987 they’re all a bit sick of each other and Snape and Remus end up getting into this massive argument which ends with Remus punching Snape and breaking his nose after Snape accuses him of being a evil

Remus storms out, Mary goes after him, Gilderoy goes to his room and Emmeline is left with Snape

Snape tells her about how the Marauders “bullied" him and his "love" for Lily and he tells her about the Prank and twists the story to make it sound like Remus wanted to kill him also. Emmeline is furious and when Remus get back they argue about it

Emmeline tells him that Snape was right and that Remus probably never cared about anyone and that he's a monster like all the other werewolves

After their argument Emmeline and Mary talk and Mary explains why she left the wizarding world and all that. They connect very emotionally. Emmeline eventually ends up falling asleep and she never sees Mary again

The next day (Christmas Eve) a bunch of shit happens while everyone’s still mad at each other I won’t get into it now but it ends with Severus, Emmeline, Remus and Gilderoy burning an entire building filled with possibly bad MACUSA employees in and killing them all

They move back to England the next day

Emmeline ends up missing all the full moons after that

In 1988 Emmeline meets a muggle called Noelle Daviss and falls in love. Because she's a muggle she starts to lean towards a muggle life for her and goes to medical school, she slowly loses contact with Snape

In 1990 Pandora died and Emmeline was among those wondering why

Also in 1990 Emmeline and Noelle got married and adopted a daughter called Julie Vance

When she heard the news of Remus being exposed as a werewolf she considered trying to contact him but doesn’t

When the Order got back together Emmeline refused to talk to Snape despite how many times he tried to talk to her. She was also avoiding Remus and Sirius like the plague. She would mostly talk to Kingsley during this time

The day before her death Emmeline went to visit Amelia while she was skating and warned Amelia to lock all of her doors because she overheard rumours that the Death Eaters might be after her

Emmeline was killed by Death Eaters while walking to Grimmauld Place on the 14th July 1996. Snape was the one to give the Death Eaters information that led to her death because Dumbledore told him to

She died exactly 14 years after Marlene

[lackadaisicallizard]

Love

Heavily inspired by/ dedicated to @sebbianas

The marauders are all there for Peter’s engagement, because of course they are. Why wouldn’t they be? They’re his closest friends. His family.

Even now, even ten years after they’ve left school and scattered around the country, they’re here. They wouldn’t miss it for the world.

“Have you stopped crying yet?” James asks Peter, walking over to where he’s ordering a drink at the bar.

The surprise engagement party following the proposal is at a local pub, one that they’ve all frequented over the years, and James has made sure that everyone who loves Peter was invited to share in this important moment in his oldest friend’s life.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Peter smiles as he hands James his drink and orders another.

James laughs. “I don’t blame you one bit, mate. I was the same at my engagement, and I was the one proposing.”

Peter chuckles, shaking his head. “I wish I could’ve seen that.”

“Oh, I was an absolute mess.”

“You still were an hour later when you told us.”

“That was me composed!”

Peter laughs again. “You really weren’t.”

James rolls his eyes and shifts his gaze to his husband, who is currently talking to Remus and Evan at one of the tables across the room. He laughs at something Remus says, expression as warm as it gets in public, and James can’t help the smile that appears on his face at the sight.

He’s so in love.

“I sometimes wonder why Reg said yes, honestly.”

Peter scoffs.

James frowns at him. “What?”

“You’re very easy to love, James. I know that first hand.”

“I mean yeah, but I mean more romantically.”

“So do I.”

James�� expression shifts to one of confusion now. “I’m lost.”

“Wait.” Peter looks at him. “You didn’t know I was in love with you?” He rolls his eyes, fondness evident in them. “Of course you didn’t, you’re so oblivious.”

James is silent for a good ten seconds, his brain racing to catch up to whatever the fuck is happening right now.

“Hold on, hold on, wait.” James meets Peter’s now amused expression. “You were what?”

Peter nods. “Oh yeah, I was big time in love with you for years. I don’t know exactly when it started, but it was some time when we were growing up. Remus dealt with a lot of it when we started school. He figured it out pretty much immediately.”

The coherent part of James’ brain is working overtime. “Hold up, Moony knew?”

“Pretty much everyone knew, Prongs. It was glaringly obvious. Well, I don’t think Sirius did actually, but he’s just as bad as you are.”

James pauses as he considers his friend’s words, “Wait, you’re not still…?”

“Oh, no! God no. I’m very much in love with my fiancé now.” He smiles as he says the word fiancé, his eyes flicking to where Benjy is chatting with Sirius before landing back on James.

“Oh good.” James takes a breath.

“I’d fear for my life if I did, honestly,” Peter smirks as James raises an eyebrow. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed but Regulus is a little bit protective of you.”

James laughs at this. He supposes he is, not that James is complaining in the slightest.

“You two were meant for each other, you know,” Peter says, and James nods. He does know. He knows it more than he knows anything else in the world. He was made to love Regulus Black, and he’s so lucky that he gets to every day of his life.

“It’s that, right there,” Peter says with a smile, “the look you get when you even think about him. It’s that look that made me sober up and realise I couldn’t love you any more,” his smile turns into a grin, “well that and the very loud pining. Honestly, I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone so happy to be constantly insulted.”

James laughs. “They were affectionate insults!”

“Either way, they worked. You found the love of your life, and I realised you weren’t the love of mine. Two birds, I guess.”

A second of silence passes between them. Peter speaks again.

“He reminded me of you at first, you know?”

James raises his eyebrows at that. He loves Benjy, but they are very different people. “Really?”

“Yeah, he knew I wasn’t interested and pursued me anyway.” He laughs and James hits his arm.

“I’ll have you know, Regulus was very interested.”

“And Lily?”

“In my defence, I had no idea she was a lesbian.”

“Oblivious.”

James pouts before speaking, his voice quieter than it was a moment ago, “I’m sorry.”

Peter’s returning smile is soft. “Don’t be. I’m so glad you didn’t love me because I’m so happy now. More than I ever thought possible.” His eyes move to Benjy again and there’s just so much love in them that James almost has to look away for a second to avoid intruding on his friend’s inner thoughts.

“You two are meant for each other, you know,” James repeats Peter’s previous sentiment and his smile widens.

“I know.”

The silence between them is broken by the cheerful sounds of the pub, the sounds of their friends all coming together to witness and celebrate the love that Peter’s found, the love that he deserves.

“You were wrong before though,” James says and Peter turns to look at him, waiting for him to finish his thought, “I do love you. I always will.”

Peter smiles. “I love you too, James.”

Something warm settles in James’ chest and he takes a sip of his drink. His tone turns teasing, “I’m just confirming that it’s platonic love.”

“Oh, fuck off.” Peter pushes off the bar and starts walking towards their friends.

“Love you!” James calls after him.

“Stop hitting on me, I’m engaged!” Peter calls back.

James laughs as he watches him walk away, joining his fiancé and settling into the arm that wraps around his waist, Benjy pressing a kiss to his head before continuing his conversation.

James is so happy for them. He’s so happy for all of them. In fact, he loves and appreciates every single person in this room.

Platonically, for the most part.

[unconventional-lawnchair]

...Too Late."

Remus Lupin x Potter!Reader

Summary: Remus comes to terms with a love lost to his own insecurities.

CW; Use of {Y/N}, Remus is dumb, yearning}

Wc: 3706

Part two

The cold night air nipped at Remus’s skin with an intensity he wasn't familiar with. He kept himself focusing on anything other then the bright lights and muffled music behind him.

He wasn't unused to the parties the Potters would throw, they were always over the top and loud, especially when James planned them. Remus would always do his rounds, speak to people he hasn't spoken to since Hogwarts, and then disappear in some quiet corner with one of Lily’s many books. Tonight? He would do anything to go home.

It wasn't the party, it wasn't his friends, for once it wasn't Sirius’s obnoxious drunken stunts. Nothing like that could send the werewolf running with his tail between his legs.

Of course, it could only be you.

“Woah, pretty cold out here, hm?” Your voice called out into the balcony from where you peaked out the door. Remus grimaced, what did he expect? Of course you would come looking for him. You two were best friends.

“Something on your mind, little Lupin?” You persisted despite his lack of acknowledgement. Remus would have rolled his eyes if he could keep the small smile off his face. You had a talent for making him feel a million emotions at once.

Ever since the day James introduced him to his older sister, the Quidditch captain, turned prefect, turned head girl. Now? Celebrated Auror. A full fledged detective.

Here he was, two years graduated and already falling behind. When he was younger, you were so unobtainable. Gone before he even hit year five. There, he could pretend that his heart didn't ache at your name, that you weren't always on his mind, that he didn't spend sleepless nights telling Lily just how much it pained him to know he'd never be worth your time.

He felt like a sap. Like a sad excuse of a man to know you hadn't spent a minute thinking about him the ways he thought of you.

“Remus?” Your voice was closer this time. You had your hands on the railing and were looking at him with such sweet eyes. Ones he remembered from his nights up in the hospital wing, with you reciting old notes from your previous years you had kept, while others studied in the classrooms.

“Hey, {Y/N}.” He mumbled and you clearly grimaced, making him look away from you.

“Have I...” You fiddled with your fingers, looking off at the manor you grew up running around. “Have I done something wrong, Remus?”

“What?” He whispered and turned to face you fully, his face falling hard. He had the chance to fully take you in. You were beautiful, but he knew that. Your hair was shorter then he remembered, your eyes were brighter, you looked.. happier. But even then, you were frowning, your brows furrowed, and it was because of him.

You gave a half sigh half scoff as you gestured between the two of you. “I haven't seen you in three years, Rem. You took one look at me and walked away.”

Remus felt his heart sink a bit at your tone. He hated to disappoint you, but what could he do to make this better? “I-” What could he say to make this hurt less? His voice came out like a pathetic whisper. “I didn't mean to, I just didn't know.. what to say? What to do?”

You have another, much more clear scoff. You raised an eyebrow, and the look on your face was a blend of confusion and something deeper. Something that made his stomach churn. “How to act? Remus, we were best friends. We still are, aren’t we?” You bit your cheek and look back at him, locking your eyes. “Even if you insist on pretending you don't know me.”

Remus felt the heat rise to his ears, an all-too-familiar rush of embarrassment mixed with guilt. A weird mixture that he seemed to seep in whenever you were around. It was never his intention to push you away, but the fear of his feelings had always loomed larger than the friendship you carried. He didn't want to be your friend. But he would have you anyway he could, even if it hurt him more then he'd like to admit. It felt like a weight too heavy to carry, and he had thought that distancing himself would lessen the burden.

“I…” He started, but the words tangled in his throat. You sat there patiently. You always did. From his monthly outlashes to his damaged moping after. “You don’t understand. It’s not that I don’t care about you. It’s just... every time I see you, it feels like I’m standing on the edge of something I can’t have.” He ran a hand through his hair, his eyes squishing closed. “You’re amazing, {Y/N}. You’ve done so much, and I-”

“Remus,” you interrupted, taking a step closer, your eyes searching his. Carefully, you placed a hand on his arm and it was like every knot in his body released. “You’re amazing too. You just graduated not but two years ago, and you’re already doing incredible things. I've heard about how you've joined the order, that's amazing. Everyone speaks so highly of you, please. You can’t keep comparing yourself to me. I’m not some unattainable ideal. I’m your friend. You know me, I'm just {Y/N}.”

“I'm just {Y/N}.”

You've said that to him so many times you'd think he'd listen.

But each time, it felt like a reminder that no matter how much you downplayed your accomplishments, with your Potter humility, you were still lightyears ahead of him. He couldn’t shake the feeling that he was somehow unworthy of you, that your brilliance only served to highlight his own insecurities. You were the sun, you always would be. And he could only reflect what you saw in him. With all your light, he could only admire it.

“{Y/N}, you don’t get it.” He said, frustration creeping into his voice. “You’ve always been the one in the spotlight, and I’m just... me.” He gestured to himself, before giving a low sigh. “Can we talk about something else?”

You frowned, your brow furrowing as you considered his words. “So you think I’m only here for the spotlight? That I wouldn’t choose to be around you just because you feel like you don’t measure up?”

“I don’t know what you want me to say,” he replied, his voice rising with each word. “It’s not that simple! I care about you too much to drag you down with me. I want you to be happy, and I’m not-”

“Remus, don't.” You cut him off and lifted your hand. He could hear your voice crack, the corners of your eyes glistened. He felt his heart break, again and again, as he admired the glistening rock on your fingers; one far bigger then he could ever afford. “You don't get to do this. You don't get to ignore me for years and then.. profess your love! Like that just makes every night I spent just waiting-”

Your voice finally cracked and you sniffled, quickly drying your tears with your open palm. “Waiting for you to say it.”

“{Y/N}...”

“No.” You shook your head and sniffed a bit. “I'm not letting you do this. Not at my engagement party, Remus. Your timing is shit and I deserve someone who won't shut me out. Won't make me wait-”

“Won't know you longer than a year before getting on one knee for you?” He snapped back and you gave a bitter laugh.

“A man who loved me enough to get over himself!” You shouted back and he shook his head.

“Oh right, because Benjy Fenwick has so much to get over, right? That pretty scarless face and his normal full moons?” He shouted. “How long did he have to pine after you for you to entertain him?”

“You don't get to pick at him. You don't get to diminish our relationship because you didn't take me when you could have had me!”

The air between you crackled with tension, both of your hearts laid bare in the chilly night and icy glares. Remus could feel the sting of your words hitting him harder than any hex ever could, and it cut deeper than his own self absorbed pity. He had never meant to make you feel small, and yet here he was, pushing his own insecurities onto you.

“I didn’t mean to-” He felt his words catch in his throat, but even those words fell flat, lost in the weight of your confession. He could of had you. He could see the hurt in your eyes, and it twisted his gut in a way that was both familiar and so foreign he was sure it wasn't his own body..

“You didn’t mean to what, Remus?” Your voice dripped with frustration, the vulnerability from moments ago replaced with an anger he was never on the receiving side of. “You didn’t mean to ruin the night? What we had? You didn’t mean to push me away? Or maybe you just didn’t mean to love me at all?”

The last words hung in the air and he could only look down at your left hand again. It was like a wall, something blocking him away from what he truly wanted. Something he waited far too long for.

The silence stretched between you, thick and suffocating, as the reality of your words settled in. Remus felt as though the ground had shifted beneath him, leaving him teetering on the edge of a precipice he had never wanted to face. His yearning. The air was heavy with all the things left unsaid, all the moments he had missed, and all the chances he hadn’t taken.

Was this one? Or should he drop it too? Would it be better for him to push? For him to take the chance? Or let you go.

“{Y/N}…” He managed, but the words felt insufficient, like a feeble attempt to bridge the chasm that had grown between you. One he chiseled out himself over the years he was too much of a coward to face you. “I never wanted to hurt you. You have to believe me.”

Your gaze softened momentarily, but the hurt was still there, raw and so clear. “You didn’t just hurt me, Remus. You left me wondering what I did wrong. Why you couldn’t see me for who I really was. I'm not some hero I'm just.. I'm just a Potter. I was just a girl who-.” Your voice trembled, and he felt a pang in his chest, like a physical ache at the thought of causing you pain. “Who loved you, Remus. Who loved you so much.”

“I thought I was protecting you.” He said, desperation creeping into his tone. “I thought if I stayed away, you’d be happier. That maybe I wouldn’t be a burden on everyone I knew. You were special. You were special to me, {Y/N}.”

“Were.” You whispered. “Was. I was. You were too Remus.”

“{Y/N}, please-”

“Hey, princess, you out here?” It was like a lightning bolt had struck, cutting through the tension that had built up like a storm cloud between you. Leaving its damaging crackles between you two, blocking Remus from crossing the line. The lovely voice of Benjy Fenwick echoed from inside the house, and your expression shifted instantly- a mask of calmness slipping over the raw emotion that had just been laid bare between you.

“Just a minute!” You called back, though your gaze remained locked on Remus, a flicker of panic showing in your eyes. He could see the struggle within you, the desire to stay and confront the truths that hung in the air, but also the need to go back to him, to shield yourself from the pain he had caused. To be with the man who was months away from promising that pain like this would never cross your face again.

“{Y/N}…” He started again, his heart racing. He felt as if he were grasping at smoke, trying to hold onto you with so much desperation. He could see it, however, you were already gone.

“Remus, I…” You hesitated, glancing back towards the door where Benjy’s voice called again, more impatient this time. “I can’t do this right now.”

With that, you took a step back, breaking the weathering connection that had tethered you together just moments before. The warmth of your hand on his arm faded, and he was left feeling colder than ever. The weight of your words hung heavy in the air, like a spell cast that he couldn’t break.

“Please.” He begged, his voice a mere whisper now, barely audible over the muffled music. “Don’t go.”

But you were already turning away, caught between two worlds- the past and the future, the love you had shared and the life that was now laid out before you. He couldn’t blame you for wanting to step back into the safety of the warm lights and laughter, to return to the life that felt secure, even if it meant leaving him behind. Leaving him to watch helplessly as you fell into the arms of a man that was nothing like him.

“Remus.” You warned, your voice trembling as you faced him one last time. “I need to go. I can’t keep doing this. Not now.”

Your eyes were filled with a mixture of nostalgic pain and resolve, and in that moment, he could see the conflict raging within you. But he felt powerless to change your mind, to convince you to stay and unravel the tangled web of emotions that had ensnared both of you. He was taking his last stand for you.

“Wait.” His voice cracked, stepping forward, his heart pounding so loud he couldn't hear anything but your voice. “I know I messed up. I know I made you wait, and I know I pushed you away. But I don’t want to lose you. Not like this.”

Your gaze dropped to the ground, and he could see the battle you were fending off with yourself. “Remus, you’re not losing me,” you pushed, your voice softening, though the distance between you felt greater then ever. “You made your choice when you walked away. You chose to shut me out.”

“No, I chose to keep you safe.” He insisted, desperation taking a full hold on his voice. “I thought I was doing the right thing. I thought if I stayed away, I wouldn’t ruin your life. But I see now that all I did was make you feel alone.”

You inhaled sharply, and for a moment, he thought he saw a flicker of understanding in your eyes. “You don’t know what it feels like to be waiting in the dark, Remus. You don’t know what it’s like to love someone who won’t let you in.”

His heart ached at your words, and he took another step closer, reaching out as if he could draw you back into the warmth of his arms, at least as a friend, the connection that had once felt so unbreakable. “I'll let you in now. I’m here. I’m ready to be what you need. Just give me a chance. Please.”

But you shook your head, the resolve returning to your features. “You had your chance, Remus. And I’m not going to break another heart just to spare mine-”

“Ours.” He insisted and you shook your head. You tried to hide it, but he could see it. You weren't over him. And he clung to the chance like it was a life line.

“Baby! There you are!” Benjy laughed as he opened the patio door. He stepped out and Remus watched as you schooled your expression and gave him a dazzling smile. Your mascara was smokey now, he could see how much you were clearly bothered in the new light.

Benjy didn't notice. “Pretty girl, it's freezing out here!” He chuckled and took off his jacket, placing it over your shoulders and put his arm around you. You just laughed and shook your head.

“It's not that bad.” You tried to placate and he didn't seem to notice your words. His cheeks flush and clearly a bit drunk.

“Hey! Remus, right? You're the new kid who joined the order, aren't ya? You know each other?” He mused and gestured between you two.

Remus felt a wave of nausea wash over him at Benjy’s familiarity with you. The warmth of your laughter felt like a dagger to his heart, twisting as he forced a smile in return, though he could feel the edges of his resolve crumbling.

“Yeah, that’s me.” He nodded, his voice low as he tried to mask the bitterness he felt. He wanted to say more, to challenge the ease with which Benjy wrapped his arm around you, but the words stuck in his throat. It felt as if he were standing on the sidelines of a game he had once played, now just a spectator to the happiness he had allowed to slip away.

You turned to Benjy, your eyes sparkling with a mix of affection he knew used to belong to him. “I was just enjoying some fresh air. Remus was keeping me company.”

“Oh, really? I thought I’d find you two out here reminiscing about your Hogwarts days.” Benjy chuckled, oblivious to the reminder only making you wince. “Thanks for keeping her entertained, bud.”

Benjy clapped his hand to Remus’s arm and turned, pulling you closer. “Let's get inside, yeah? Gonna freeze my tits off.”

His crude comment shocked a laugh out of you, making Remus flinch.

“Yeah, let’s get inside.” You hummed with a nod, your voice carrying a cheerfulness that felt forced. Remus wanted to scream, to reach out and pull you back, to tell you everything he had been too scared to say. But the words remained lodged in his throat, heavy with the weight of regrets unspoken.

As you turned to walk back inside, Remus felt the distance between you grow. He wanted to call after you, to stop you and lay bare his heart, but the laughter and music from the party surged around him, drowning out his thoughts.

He was losing you, and he knew it. The very thought made his heart ache, a dull throb that reverberated through him. It was a pain he had grown accustomed to over the years, but now it felt all too real, all too present, and he couldn’t bear it.

“Hey, Remus!” James's voice suddenly broke through the fog of his despair as he approached, a bright smile on his face. “You alright? You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

“Just… catching some fresh air. {Y/N} was keeping me out of my head.” Remus muttered, forcing a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. He could see the excitement written all over his face, but it felt miles away, a world he no longer belonged to.

“Come inside! You’re missing the best part!” James insisted, clapping a hand on his shoulder. “We’ve got some games going on, and Lily’s got a surprise planned. You’ll want to be there for it.”

Remus nodded, though his heart wasn’t in it. “Yeah, I’ll… I’ll be there in a minute.”

“Alright, but don’t keep us waiting too long!” James called, heading back into the house, leaving Remus alone once more.

With a heavy sigh, Remus leaned against the railing, staring out into the night. The stars twinkled above him, indifferent to his turmoil, and he felt a hollow emptiness settle in his chest. He had always been good at hiding from the world, but now, he felt exposed and vulnerable, stripped of the defenses he had built around himself.

He glanced back toward the door, his heart racing as he thought about the laughter and joy that awaited him inside. But more importantly, you were inside, and he was terrified of what that meant.

The sound of laughter drew his attention back to the door, and he caught a glimpse of you and Benjy, surrounded by a group of friends. Your smile was genuine, your laughter infectious, and the way you leaned into Benjy, it stung more than anything he could have imagined. He almost heaved when he saw you give him such a gentle and loving kiss.

“Just say it.” He whispered to himself, the words echoing in his mind. “Just tell her how you feel.”

But the words wouldn’t come. He had waited too long, and now it felt like it was too late. Could he even do that? Could he ruin your chances at a normal life? That was what he wanted, right? You to be happy? To not be plagued with what he was?

As the door swung shut behind James, sealing you away with a future he couldn’t be a part of, Remus felt a sense of finality settle over him. He couldn't face you. It was done. He had let you slip through his fingers, and now all he could do was watch as you moved on without him.

With a final glance at the door, he turned away from the party, the music fading into the background as he made his way down the steps and into the darkness. He could feel the weight of his heart, heavy with regret, but he knew he had to keep moving forward, even if it meant leaving you to travel down your own path. One that had nothing to do with him.

Somehow, he would have to learn to live with the choices he had made, the love he had thrown away. And somehow, he would have to learn to live with the fact that he had lost the one person who had meant everything to him.

As he walked away from the Potters’ home, he felt the cold night air wrap around him more then before, a stark reminder of the warmth he had just lost. And with each step, he couldn’t shake the feeling that he was leaving a piece of himself behind- one he might never get back.

His heart always preferred you anyway.

[arliedraws]

Go on about Sirius and Benjy I am listening

Well, I went down a Benjy Fenwick hc rabbithole and created a backstory, so thank you for that

Benjy Fenwick comes from a working class seaside town in North Yorkshire. His father is a mechanic and his mother works part time as a cashier. Benjy’s the oldest of five children—he and his youngest brother (born when Benjy is about twelve) are the only siblings with magic. But he almost didn’t go to Hogwarts because he could hardly afford any of his books or materials, but he worked his little eleven-year-old butt off to make extra money. A natural salesman, he finds scraps to sell to kids he knows, gambles, scams adults until he gets the money he needs.

He loves his parents, particularly his mum. He feels incredibly guilty to be leaving his family behind, convinced that he needs to take care of them, but his parents insist that he goes. When Benjy gets to school, however, it’s clear that he is Poor. The first person to point this out is Bellatrix Black, a particularly nasty Slytherin girl in his year who comes from a very old pureblood family.

But Benjy is the most shameless, charming, devil-may-care sort of boy. He’s decent at school, but doesn’t care about doing well—he just cares about doing what’s right. He’s a jock type without possessing a shred of interest in the jock activities—he doesn’t give a damn about Quidditch but gets bored sitting still, but he’ll fly a broom to see how fast it goes. Too clever for his own good—could talk his way out of anything. He doesn’t need to lie—he just tells the truth so plainly that you can’t help appreciating his candor.

All of this infuriates Bellatrix Black, and she’s determined to make this little Ravenclaw as miserable as possible by trying to turn people against him. But Benjy is a really difficult person to hate. He’s the sort of kid who, if he doesn’t get a spell correct, is the first to laugh at his mistake. He asks the “dumb” questions in class—the ones that people are too embarrassed to admit they don’t know the answer to—with a shit-eating grin. He’s the first to protest if a professor gives them an extra long essay or a pop quiz and give the most convincing argument why the teacher should spare them—and sometimes, he’s even successful.

He gets a few O.W.L.s and a couple of N.E.W.T.s but not enough for a job in the Ministry. He never really wanted to do bureaucratic shit anyway. When he finishes school, he goes back home to work with his father as a mechanic. His family has always been his first priority, after all. And he’s pretty happy! He’s probably gay and he has younger siblings who are happily married and having kids, so he feels no pressure to “settle down” and marry some girl.

Anyway, Bellatrix Black’s old rivalry with Benjy never faded, and his family is savagely murdered in one of the earliest massacres of the war. He was supposed to be killed too, but he happened to be elsewhere that night. Mr. and Mrs. Fenwick are murdered, as well as two of his siblings, their spouses, and their children. Benjy goes feral when the Ministry do very little to investigate. He decides to hunt down the perpetrators himself but accidentally ends up sabotaging an Order of the Phoenix mission led by Alastor Moody.

Dumbledore asks Benjy to join the Order, and soon, Benjy becomes a key player in the war. He’s an excellent duelist, he can make muggle explosives that evade magical detection, he hasn’t got a lot left to lose, and most importantly, he has to make the world a better place for his little brother who’s still at school.

Benjy has been with the Order for five years by 1978. He’s still cheeky but a little jaded, battle-hardened, and a bit wary of the newest recruits who are too fresh out of Hogwarts. What is Dumbledore thinking bringing on these kids? And one of them is Bellatrix Black’s cousin.

This Sirius kid is charming and reminds Benjy a bit of himself when he was that age, but Benjy is also a bit suspicious of the pureblood heir. He hides his distrust, though Sirius can sense it. When a mission goes wrong, Sirius risks his own life to save his friends and finally earns Benjy’s respect. Others in the Order still don’t entirely trust Sirius because of his family, but Benjy sees something in him and takes Sirius under his wing as Sirius’s friends become more and more distant while the war pulls them apart.

Benjy spends more time with Sirius who constantly drops in unexpectedly at his house in Yorkshire. He’s worried about Sirius who begins behaving recklessly as James becomes more entangled with Lily. Benjy has to pull him back, insisting that he’s needlessly putting himself in danger.

When Sirius is furious that James and Lily are planning to wed, Benjy initially doesn’t see the problem—then he realizes that Sirius is in love with James. Benjy attempts to comfort him, but he discovers, to his surprise, that perhaps he’s always wanted to comfort Sirius. But Sirius is too young for him and in love with someone else…though he can’t deny he wants this kid very, very badly.

Meanwhile, Sirius desires approval from someone he respects, and Benjy has always praised Sirius in exactly the way Sirius likes—sarcastic remarks and a pinch of his cheek, winks, exasperated smiles. He likes how Benjy throws his arm around his shoulders like they’re mates; he likes that Benjy treats him like an adult when they’re on missions. They drink together, share the same kind of humor, etc. Benjy even brings Sirius to work in the auto body repair shop, etc. It’s hard to resist the older wizard—and it doesn’t help that Benjy is a fit, working class hunk.

Neither is sure who made the first move, only that Sirius came directly to Benjy’s house after James proposed to Lily. Benjy lets Sirius rage about it until Sirius, exhausted, settles down next to Benjy on the sofa, and Benjy just sort of…strokes his hair. And a lightbulb turns on for both of them.

From then on, when Sirius isn’t with his friends, he’s with Benjy. He doesn’t tell anyone about his relationship with Benjy (who warns that if Moody finds out, they won’t be able to partner up anymore). As they become more involved, Sirius can’t always explain where he’s been which looks…suspicious to people.

Anyway, if this were a fic, I’d probably add the plot of Bellatrix finding out about Benjy fucking her most eligible bachelor cousin, reigniting her old hatred of him.

Yada yada, Benjy dies to save Sirius—and no one alive knows they were ever together.

[binvibin]

me when the marauders side characters are either absolute monsters or better than the main group

[tedwardremus]

Benjy Fenwick is a tenacious investigative journalist for the Daily Prophet. Despite the Ministry’s tight control over the narrative of the war, Benjy persistently publishes articles that expose Death Eater activities and criticize the passive pure-blood ideology that enables their violence to thrive. His reporting makes him a target when he anonymously publishes a leaflet revealing the identities of several Death Eaters, an act that ultimately seals his fate as a marked man by Voldemort's inner circle.