#because look at what i brought to talk about. look what i made

[stellamarielu]

blurred lines II

joel miller x female reader

read part one here

summary: after the little stunt you pulled last night, joel can't bring himself to be in the same room as you. he's canceling his weekly plans to join your dad for sunday night football, and you're fed up with the awkward tension which leads you marching right over to his place determined to fix the problem.

content: nswf, 18+, dbf!joel, age gap, a sprinkle of angst, pet names [duh its joel], lots of praise, fingering, penetration, riding that man like a mechanical bull, unprotected sex, joel finishing in reader without explicit permission, basically just smut with very little plot let's go!

author's note: i need joel miller circa 2003 like i need air in my lungs, so of course i had to write a part 2 for this one

“What're you doin' here?”

Joel hadn’t expected to see you standing directly in front of him holding a Tupperware bowl when he opened his front door.

“Brought you some Chili.” You were stating nonchalantly as if he should’ve been expecting your company.

He had flaked on your dad tonight. Of course he had. 

After what happened last night, you didn’t expect him to show his face at your house like he normally did every Sunday, but it didn’t stop his excuse of feeling “under the weather” from pissing you off.

You made things complicated when you decided to call him last night. Why couldn’t you have kept it together and just called an uber instead?

You spent the entire day feeling guilty and embarrassed and even though you tried to blame your inappropriate advances on the alcohol you’d consumed, you knew it wasn’t the real reason you crossed a line in the backseat of his truck.

After he got out of coming over for the game, you watched the empty seat on your couch that he usually occupied and let the guilt eat you alive. Him and your dad should have been drinking beers and yelling at TV together, but instead your dad just sat in silence.

You couldn’t handle it— you needed to talk to Joel. You weren’t sure what you would even say to him, but before you knew it, you were packaging up leftovers and telling your dad you were taking dinner to Joel and Sarah during halftime.

“Is Sarah home?”

You were asking and looking over Joel’s shoulder, the leftovers still warm in your hands.

“No-“ 

He’d hardly responded when you pushed past him and into the familiar territory of his living room, cutting straight to the chase.

“Why didn’t you come over tonight?” 

“I think we both know the answer to that.” His voice was laced with annoyance at your question.

He was standing a few feet away, still by the front door. Watching as you angrily stormed into his house, setting the Tupperware down on the coffee table.

“Okay, but you didn’t have to lie to my dad.” 

You were coming in hot. You needed this to be over so you could stop feeling so embarrassed and remorseful about the whole thing. 

“Oh, your right, I should’ve just told him I almost fucked his daughter so it’d be kinda weird for me to come over.” Joel was scoffing as he leaned against a nearby wall, folding his arms over his chest. Your skin was burning at his words.

“Look I’m sorry for making things weird, but can we just move on? I don’t want to be the reason you don’t come around anymore. You’re like my dad’s only friend.”

“Then why’d you do it?” His voice was rough, almost like he was angry with you, but his eyes told a different story. They were gentle— carefully watching your expression as you wracked your brain for an answer. 

“Because…” You were trying to avoid his eyes but it was nearly impossible given the way he was staring so intently at you from across the room.

You started out so firm but now you were crumbling. His tender gaze picking away at you, wildling you down into a pile of nerves. 

“I don’t know Joel, let’s just drop it. I’ll keep to myself from now on and we can just pretend like nothing happened. Just please don’t let this effect your friendship with my dad.”

Joel chuckled at your words, an amused smile forming on his lips— Like this is something that could be easily forgotten. 

“Why’d you ask me to pick you up.” The smile disappeared from his face as quickly as it had formed. His demeanor was serious again as he revisited the objective of the conversation. The memory of you touching yourself in his car standing between you like an undeniable presence the room.

“What do you mean? I was out drinking and needed a ride.” You were trying to keep it together but there was a hint of hesitation in your words. 

“Yeah, but anyone could’ve given you a ride. Why’d you call me at 2am.” 

His eyes were locked on yours, heavy and sincere. 

“What do you want me to say Joel?"

here you go.

"Do you just want me to keep embarrassing myself? I didn’t want anyone else to pick me up. I wanted it to be you. I wanted an excuse to see you.” You were huffing out the words in a quiet voice, too mortified to speak above a whisper. 

“Thought that was pretty obvious when I had my hand between my legs in the backseat of your truck.” 

Your words were left ringing in the silent room as Joel just stared, his expression stuck in concentration. 

“Happy now?” You were deadpanning with a wave of your hands. Why wasn't he saying anything? You couldn’t read his expression and it was infuriating. 

“Very.” 

One word was all he said as he pushed himself off the wall, his arms still loosely crossed over his chest. He was taking small steps in your direction and your entire body froze. 

“I’ve been tryin’ to convince myself all day that you were just drunk last night. That the only reason you did such a filthy fuckin’ thing was because you were horny off one too many vodka sodas.”

His eyes didn’t leave yours as he spoke, his body now within reach. 

“I needed to tell myself it wasn’t because you like me.” His eyes were glued to you.

“Needed to convince myself that ya weren’t bein’ all sweet touchin' yourself like that because ya wanted me to fuck you.”

He was taking another step, the gap between you dwindling down with every word he spoke.

“Because if that was the case, if ya did do it on purpose...” He paused, letting his eyes rake down your body. Taking his time before he continued, his stare lingering on your lips.

“Do ya know how hard it was for me to keep my fuckin’ hands to myself?” He was so close, you could see his chest rising and falling with each shallow breath he took.

His stare was dense and all you could think about was how you’d never been this close to him before.

“Joel…” You meant to whisper his name as a warning but instead it came out as a pathetic whimper; only encouraging another inevitable step over the blurred line of your relationship. 

He was leaning in, and you weren’t stopping him.

“This is such a bad fuckin’ idea.” He avoided your lips and ducked his head into your neck, his whisper landing right below your ear and you could feel his breath on your skin. 

“I don’t care.” The words were a rushed hum as your fingers found the nape of his neck. You suddenly felt desperate to have his lips on you. 

“Please.”

That word had Joel spiraling. God, hearing you beg for him like that, he needed to hear it again. Wanted to hear it fall from your lips over and over again while he had you sitting on his cock.

“You said you think about me when you touch yourself.” Joel’s voice was a hum against your skin as his lips finally connected with your neck. He was placing a long drawn-out kiss right beneath your jaw before pulling away just enough for more words to make their way from his mouth.  

“Tell me what you think about.” His breathless whisper on your body made you dizzy, sending your fingertips clutching into this hair- desperate to find something to tether you back to earth. 

“I think about the way it’d feel- when you touch me.” Another pitiful whine. 

“Touch you where?” His words were barely audible as he continued placing gentle kisses down the side of your neck. 

“Joel…”

“C’mon sweetheart, you were so brave tellin’ me what ya wanted last night. Don’t get all shy on me now.” His voice was low and rough- intoxicating. 

“Think about your fingers in me. How they’re so much bigger than mine. How good they’d feel filling me up.” 

You were reaching for one of his hands as you spoke, holding it in front of you and tracing his palm before you pressed your hands together, his was so big and rough compared to yours. 

Then he was intertwining your fingers together and using the hold to pull you into him, your bodies flushed together. A groan left his mouth sending a sweet vibration into your skin.

“There she is.” He was murmuring into the crook of your neck, his hands finding your waist and gripping tight, pulling your hips closer. He absorbed your frame in his own, the muscle of his body solid and sturdy against yours. 

Joel felt like he was dreaming.

After he got home from dropping you off last night, he barely made it to his room before he was yanking down his jeans and wrapping his hand around his dick. The images of your fingers pushed deep inside of you were pulled from his memory, making him finish in record time. He thought about you all night. He couldn’t even sleep as visions of you filled his mind; you curling your fingers into his hair with his head between your legs, you on your knees for him, you with your head buried into his pillow and your perfect ass pushed back while he railed into you from behind. He thought about nearly every sexual scenario possible and now you were here, your soft body like putty in his hands.

“Let’s see then.” His voice was low as he kissed your neck one last time, pulling away just enough to look you in the eyes. 

“See if I can make ya come on my fingers yeah?” 

There was a soft smile on his lips conflicting with his sinful heavy-lidded stare. His hands were unruly as he explored your figure, dipping beneath the material of your shirt to feel the warmth of your skin on his fingertips.

“Wanted to see it last night, could barely hold myself back from pushin’ your pretty little hand out of my way so I could be the one makin’ ya feel good.”

One of his hands remained on the skin just above the waistband of your jeans while the other trailed up your body until it was on your face.

Joel’s hand was carefully caressing your cheek, rubbing his thumb back and forth over your skin. The act was reminiscent of the way he was rubbing your thigh not even 24 hours ago, and the recollection had you clenching your thighs together. You let your mind wonder back to the dirty things Joel said to you last night; the way he watched with a predatory glare as you fingered yourself in front of him. You were lost in the echo of it all until Joel caught you off guard, crashing his lips into yours. 

His kiss was heavy. The weight of unspoken feelings and undeniable tension fueling the way his lips molded into yours. Your shared desire was finally being dealt with and the relief was almost palpable in the liberation of his mouth on yours.

Your lips were tangled in a messy embrace as Joel ushered you backwards until you felt the back of your legs hit the couch.

His lips were following as you flopped down on the cushions, his body leaning forward between your legs. The kiss didn’t lose any momentum as his hands pulled at your jeans. You were arching off the couch assisting Joel as he slid the denim down your legs, breaking the kiss to watch you kick them off your body completely. 

He had been aching to see you like this again. Legs spread and chest heaving. Only this time he didn’t have to hold back. He could touch you; see what you looked like with his fingers knuckles deep in your sweet little cunt.

At that reminder Joel was reaching a hand down to feel you through your panties, his fingertips tracing the outline of your swollen lips, already wet beneath your underwear. 

“Fuck sweetheart you’re soaked.” 

The hot sticky evidence of your arousal was seeping through the cotton material, causing Joel to let out an animalistic groan. He hadn’t even touched you yet and he was losing all sense of control. 

He continued running his fingers over the ruined material, circling your clit over the clothing.

You were already writhing under his touch, which you normally would’ve considered pathetic, but not now. Not when you had been waiting for this exact moment. Now that it was really unfolding, you were proud of yourself for not taking his hand in your own and shoving his fingers where you really needed them.

He kept circling slowly and intricately, still leaning over you— his face inches from yours.

“That feel good?” His voice was a sweet murmur as you moaned in response. 

He was pleased by your answer, pushing your panties to the side and dipping a single finger into your entrance. His digit was gently pressing into you as he watched your face contort in pleasure.

Letting you bathe in satisfaction for only a second, he was retreating. Pulling his thick finger from your core before pushing it back between your wet folds, only this time adding a second along with it.

You were immediately reaching for his forearm, grabbing it instinctively, looking for something to hold onto while you went braindead with pleasure. You were biting down on your lip as he leisurely pumped his fingers in and out of you, scared of the obscene noises you would make if you didn’t.

“Let me hear ya baby.” Joel was smiling down at you with a devious grin. He could see the way you were suppressing your moans. He wanted to hear you; wanted to know how good he was making you feel, wanted to hear the pretty sounds you made when you came around his fingers.  

You let your mouth fall open. The whimper that fell out upon hearing his words prompted Joel to push his fingers further into you, curling when he felt the spongey warmth of your walls tightening. 

He could tell by the moan rolling off your tongue that he had found a favorable spot deep in your core. He kept his fingers bending in the perfect position as he peered down at you. 

The sight beneath him had his hips bucking into nothing. You with your head thrown back on his couch; eyes shut, brows furrowed and jaw slack. After last night he thought he’d never see something so glorious again, but now you were proving him wrong. You looked so beautiful like this— all fucked-out with his hand between your legs. 

The deliberate curl of his fingers with each plunge was sending you reeling as you let profanities bubble up in your throat. Just as you felt yourself teetering on the brink of release Joel added the pressure of his thumb on your clit.

“You gonna come already?” His words were sprinkled with amusement as he felt you clenching around his fingers. 

“Joel…” His name was a moan on your lips, and you were digging your fingers into his forearm, desperate to hold yourself steady as your body tensed.

“Fuck- you’re gonna come.” He was grunting as his fingers kept their pace. You were mewling out his name and nodding your head in desperation as you felt the coil inside you pulling tighter, ready to snap.

“Let me have it baby.” Joel was nearly begging you to let go. His tone as he growled out the words pushed you right over the edge, sending you into an abyss of pleasure. 

Your body was trembling as you whined out Joel’s name. He could feel your pussy squeezing his fingers as he continued to push them into you gently, relishing in the feeling of your warm embrace. 

“There ya go.” His grunts and groans were replaced with a calm voice as he worked you through your orgasm. 

“Good job sweetheart.”

His praises only added to the sensory overload running rampant through your body. 

“So beautiful baby.”

You were finally opening your eyes, looking up at him with a lust clouded gaze.

He couldn’t stop himself from kissing you again, only this time deeper. It was laced with passion and had you pulling him down onto the couch next to you.

Your mind and body were still buzzing from your climax, making it easier to gain dominance over him. You were pushing Joel back against the pillows and climbing onto his lap, straddling his waist. Your kiss had become sloppy and hungry as your lips worked in tandem to relieve the thick tension. 

“Off.” You were mumbling against his mouth and fumbling with the button of his jeans.

He got your message loud and clear as his own hands flew to the waistband of his pants. He was lifting his hips off the couch to free his body of the jeans but in doing so he was thrusting up into you, his erection grinding into your unclothed core. You were bringing your hands to his chest to stabilize yourself as he pushed his pants and underwear to the floor. 

You couldn’t stop your eyes from wandering down to his member now on full display. He was big. You knew he would be, but this, this was more than you'd imagined. 

In awe you brought a hand between you, encasing him gently with your touch and ever so slowly letting your fingers follow up and down his length.

You looked to his face to see his eyes fluttering closed in pure delight from finally feeling some sort of relief. The pressure that had been building inside him since he watched you finger fuck yourself last night was slowly dissipating with every pump of your hand around his cock.

You stroked him a few times, your touch soft and cautious; driving Joel insane. He was groaning with every flick of your wrist.

“Need to be inside ya.” A longing yet primal gaze took over his expression as he muttered the words; confessing his need to feel you, all of you.

They were the magic words, the ones that had you lifting your hips and guiding the head of his cock to your slicked entrance. You lingered there, with his tip filling you just enough, soaking in the final tension filled moments before you both completely gave in to your mutual desire.

Your eyes were locked on his, the two of you exchanging one last look of approval before you were sinking further onto him. 

You both let out hums of relief as you felt him stretching you inch by inch.

You were moving slowly, letting yourself adjust to his size as you relaxed onto him. His fingers were gripping onto your hips, holding you steady but careful not to guide you further. He wanted to let you set the pace. 

You sunk down until you were met the base of his cock rubbing against your clit. You were sat completely on him, taking a moment to savor the way he felt pushing deep inside of you. 

“That’s it baby.” He was whispering another praise as his hands traced up your body, taking your shirt with them and tossing it to the floor. Then his touch was on your face, holding your jaw in his fingertips and bringing your gaze down to meet his. 

“That okay? Feel good?” His questions were genuine, but they were spiked with such a immoral tone you might’ve thought he was mocking you. 

“So good.” Your voice was breathless as you affirmed him.

You decisively rocked your hips over his and an unconscious moan slipped from your lips at feeling him move inside you.

He brought his hands back to your hips as you started to move. Gripping onto your skin and guiding your body onto his as you began to bounce up and down on his cock.

“Oh honey- fuck.” He was moaning out as you picked up your pace, relentlessly taking him as deep as you could with every rebound. 

“That’s its baby.” His words were tumbling out of his mouth with every movement of your hips. You were riding him with such precision his mind was going numb, rendering him uncapable of piecing together coherent sentences.

Your palms were flat against his chest and your head thrown back in pleasure as he rubbed against you at just the right angle. You were using him to your full advantage as you shamelessly fucked yourself on his cock.

“Take what ya need baby.” He was encouraging your lewd movements, the sounds leaving his mouth were borderline pathetic as he tried to keep himself together long enough to feel you coming around him.  

He was letting his hands wander further, gripping the flesh of your ass with his palms and using the hold to pull you harder into him with each thrust. 

The desperation in his grasp had you seeing stars. You were bracing yourself on the rigid surface of his chest as you felt the familiar crawl of a second release sneaking up on you.

“Joel I’m gonna…” Your announcement was cut short by a surprised whine as Joel moved his hips along with yours, pushing himself even deeper into you. The way he was stretching, filling and holding onto you had your body straining and your vision blurring.

“Let me have it sweetheart.” 

The carnal grunt off Joel’s tongue as he coaxed you into another orgasm brought you to your finish. You were clutching at his chest, your body melting into his. The pleasure surging through your body caused you to lose all balance, making you slump forward until your forehead found his.

Joel reached for you, placing a hand carefully at the nape of your neck, holding you against him. 

“God you’re fuckin’ perfect.” Another groan was leaving his throat as he pushed his lips onto yours. You were still coming down from your high, pussy squeezing and clasping around him as he muffled your moans with his mouth. 

“So perfect baby.” He was mumbling as he used both of his hands to hold you firm, slowly bringing his hips up to meet yours. His pace was unhurried as he took pleasure in the way you fluttered around him. Then he got caught up in the moment, his tempo quickening. He was thrusting into you persistently, mercilessly rutting as breathless whimpers fell from his tongue. He was holding you still with his fingers curling into your hips as he drove into you— hard and fast.

He was groaning and greedily fucking up into you as his hips began to stutter. With a low guttural sound his movements ceased and you were met with the warmth of his release spreading into you.

He was frozen in place for a few seconds, catching his breath and gathering a sense of composure. You could feel him throbbing in you as his hands kept their hold on your hips. 

“That was so fuckin’ stupid.” He was muttering under his breath, and you immediately felt insecure. He was still inside you and he was already regretting hooking up with you?

“We don’t have to do it again Joel, it was just-“ You were beginning to defend yourself before Joel cut you off. 

”No sweetheart, comin’ in ya.” Joel looked at you with a sympathetic grin on his face.

“I can’t be doin’ that.” He was shaking his head at the poor decision of burying his spend deep inside you. 

“I’m on birth control, it’s okay.” You felt relieved to know his shame wasn’t about having sex with you, but rather his panic of potentially knocking you up. Understandable. 

“Don’t care it’s not smart.” He was reaffirming and leaning up to place a kiss on your forehead; a simple gesture but it had butterflies swarming your stomach.

“How ya gonna explain to your dad why it took so long to drop off leftovers?” Joel was releasing his clutch on your hips and letting his hands rest lightly on your thighs as he spoke. 

“Oh my god, please don’t talk about my dad right now.”

You were mortified. You couldn’t think about your dad. Not while you were straddling his best friend’s lap who’s come was fighting not to leak out between you. 

“Looks like I’m really gonna need to move out soon.” You were groaning and bringing your fingers to your temples, hiding your face in your hands. 

“Oh, without a doubt.” Joel was laughing at your predicament, but he’d be damned if he couldn’t keep having you like this. Now that he’d gotten a taste, he wouldn’t be letting you out of his sight any time soon.

my masterlist

[kxsagi]

"𝐫𝐢𝐯𝐚𝐥𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐢𝐞𝐥𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐢𝐧 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞"

a/n: includes three different alternative endings!

the moment yoichi isagi stepped onto the pitch, he felt the familiar heat rise in his chest, not just from the roaring crowd, but from the sight of him. 

michael kaiser. 

the guy had been a thorn in isagi’s side since their blue lock days. now, playing for rival clubs in the german league, their rivalry was a headline every season. their clashes were fierce, their words sharper than any referee’s whistle. 

but neither of them knew how much worse it could get.

until you.

you weren’t just beautiful. you were brilliant, an up-and-coming fashion designer whose work was making waves in elite social circles. you had designed custom suits and jerseys for some of the biggest names in sports, and somehow, both isagi and kaiser had ended up on your client list.

at first, it was harmless. just fittings and polite conversation. but then kaiser started noticing how isagi looked at you. how he lingered after appointments, how his usual tough demeanor softened when you adjusted the collar of his jacket.

it became a silent war, more ruthless than anything on the field.

kaiser would "coincidentally" schedule fittings right after isagi’s, ensuring you had to compare their styles, his tailored elegance against isagi’s effortless confidence. isagi countered by requesting custom pieces on short notice, forcing you to spend extra time working with him. if isagi sent you flowers to congratulate you on a successful fashion show, kaiser sent a limited-edition designer handbag.

the rivalry bled onto the pitch. if kaiser dribbled past isagi, he’d smirk and tug at his jersey, the one you designed. if isagi scored, he made sure kaiser saw him pointing toward the VIP section where you sat, elegantly unimpressed.

you weren’t stupid. you knew exactly what was happening.

and then came the night that changed everything.

a high-profile charity gala. both men, suited up, courtesy of your designs, having a stare-down. you, in a sleek black dress, looked between them with an exasperated sigh.

“you two are ridiculous,” you said, swirling the wine in your glass.

kaiser leaned in. “ridiculous? we just happen to have –”

“– great taste,” isagi finished, smug.

you rolled your eyes, then took a sip of your wine before smirking. “so, you both like me. that’s cute.”

kaiser and isagi exchanged uneasy glances.

you set your glass down and grinned. “and it’s a shame, really, because i don’t date clients.”

silence.

then, your laughter, soft and amused.

you walked away, leaving two of the league’s fiercest competitors standing dumbfounded.

isagi exhaled. “we’re idiots.”

kaiser nodded, rubbing his face. “yeah.”

for the first time in years, they had something to agree on.

and the rivalry continued. just, perhaps, with a little less venom. 

a/n: alternative ending: instead of saying you don’t date clients, you say you’re dating rin itoshi

𝐤𝐚𝐢𝐬𝐞𝐫'𝐬 𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠

you had been around footballers long enough to know that rivalry ran deep. you just never expected to be part of one.

isagi and kaiser were both your clients, both infuriatingly charming, both unbearably competitive. for months, they had turned your fashion studio into a battleground, one-upping each other in ridiculous ways.

but kaiser was different.

it wasn’t just the grand gestures or the sharp suits he requested. it was the way he lingered after fittings, asking about your designs with genuine curiosity. the way he brought you coffee without asking how you took it because he already knew. the way he listened, really listened, when you talked about your dreams of launching your own boutique.

so when he showed up at your studio one rainy evening, you weren’t entirely surprised.

“hey,” he said, leaning against the doorway, looking unsure for the first time since you’d met him. “i know you said you don’t date clients.”

“i did,” you said, crossing your arms. “still true.” 

kaiser exhaled, then stepped inside. “then let’s change that.”

you raised an eyebrow. “how?”

he pulled out a neatly folded contract, sliding it onto your worktable.

“i’m officially switching to another designer.”

you blinked. “what?”

“i already talked to someone else. from now on, i’m just michael.” he smiled, slow and confident, the way he did right before scoring a goal. “not a client. just a guy who really wants to take you out to dinner.”

you couldn’t help the laugh that bubbled up. the idiot had actually fired you.

you shook your head. “you’re impossible.”

“and you’re beautiful.” he stepped closer, lowering his voice. “so… what do you say?”

you pretended to think about it, even though you already knew the answer.

“i say,” you said, tilting your chin up to meet his gaze, “you’d better not be late picking me up.”

and just like that, the rivalry was over.

at least, for one of them.

𝐢𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐢'𝐬 𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠

you had dealt with egos before, but nothing compared to isagi and kaiser. the two were locked in an endless game, using you as the unwitting referee.

it was exhausting.

but isagi… isagi made it fun.

sure, he was cocky. but he was also the one who showed up unannounced with dinner when you were working late. the one who made you laugh with ridiculous impressions of his teammates. the one who, despite all the posturing, always looked at you like you were something he hadn’t figured out yet.

so when he walked into your studio one evening, drenched from the rain, his usual bravado stripped away, you knew something was different.

“i’m done,” he said, running a hand through his wet hair. “i’m tapping out of this stupid game with kaiser.”

you raised an eyebrow. “game?”

“the competition. the ridiculous stunts. the flowers, the bags, the suits, the –” he exhaled. “i don’t want to win against him. i just want you.”

you stared at him, your heart hammering.

“so,” he continued, shifting awkwardly. “if you don’t feel the same, tell me now, and i’ll walk away. but if you do –” he paused, then smirked, some of his confidence returning. “then i’d really like to take you to dinner.”

you bit your lip.

isagi was bold, relentless, and sometimes infuriating.

but he was also standing in front of you, completely vulnerable, offering something real.

you stepped forward, slowly, until you were close enough to hear his breath hitch.

“dinner,” you murmured. “no competition?”

he grinned. “no competition.”

you smiled. “then pick me up at eight.”

and just like that, isagi had finally won… without even trying. 

© 𝐤𝐱𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐢

[bunni-v1]

MORE JEALOUS PURE VANILLA COOKIE OMGGGG he'd totally be a jealous person despite his kindness

kinda imagining that in the stage during the push and pull he was doing, trying to push you away, you become quite close to some other cookies in the kingdom, specifically the creme Republic (clotted cream and financier) and he just gets.... uncomfortable when you two are FINALLY together because you're so friendly with clotted cream and his bodyguard.... like, hello.........

his eyes narrow slightly, and it just makes him feel so unpleasant, knowing that clotted cream cookie can easily strike up conversation with you and randomly tell him something you like—it makes his dough seethe slightly, whether he wants to admit it or not. or how financier and some random vanilla kingdom npcs mention a fact about you he coincidentally doesn't know because he was busy going through it and pushing you away before; OUGHHHHHH

i like to think white lily is involved in this in some way? he can't fully get over her and sometimes he tends to get passive about your very real concerns about how he looks at her as though he has something to say, i wonder how he would react if he finds you actually a bit insecure or unsure whether he'd pick you over her......... since he still cares deeply about his once first love, no?

anyways. yes. jealous PV is a concept that sticks heavily in my mind rn

-���

Jealousy Looks Ugly on You

🍓Hi pookiebear, I'm so sorry for 100% butchering the Creme Republic. I refuse to play that shit, even for that stupid blonde twink. Note, this takes place significantly after the events of Beast Yeast, so White Lily is technically visiting as a diplomat from the Faerie kingdom, and pv has already had his character development lol. Assumptions are made, and there is heavily implied past PureLily.

Tw: Poor communication; jealousy; implications at the very end; grammar/spelling errors

Info: Pure Vanilla x Reader; Implied past purelily; angst (not really though); fluff

Patience is a virtue that few cookies can claim to have. It's something that doesn't come easy to most, and Pure Vanilla Cookie has never judged anyone for being unable to hold themselves back from frustration. Except... himself of course.

He was exceptionally patient, to the point most gawked at him for his gentleness and understanding in certain situations. He held himself to a higher standard, and very few things brought out irritation in him. So... why exactly was the sight of Clotted Cream Cookie making his dough run so hot right now?

It wasn't as though Clotted Cream was doing anything offensive, quite the opposite actually. He was having a pleasant conversation, all warm smiles and... gentle touches. With who? Oh. Just the object of Pure Vanilla's deepest affections, the cookie he'd only recently been able to call his other half, his dearly beloved you.

Clotted Cream seems to speak to you with such familiarity, such warmth like perhaps he too harbors some kind of affection for you. Pure Vanilla's eyebrow twitches when he leans in to whisper something in your ear, and you laugh like it's the funniest thing you've ever heard. It nearly pulls a frown out of him, but his calm smile remains steadfast, not wanting you to notice and worry over him.

Still, his eyes narrow when Clotted Cream pats you on your shoulder good-naturedly. The former cookie locking eyes with him and smiling before sending you back to his side like he hadn't earned Pure Vanilla's ire only seconds ago. You are oblivious, as you always are, as he wants you to be. He only smiles at you, wrapping his arm around your waist and pulling you just a little closer than he normally does.

"Did you enjoy your time with Clotted Cream Cookie, my love?" He asks sweetly, though he doesn't really want to know.

You give him a beaming smile, "As always. He knows how to make boring proceedings fun."

"Ah," he hopes you don't notice how he tenses, "What were you talking about just now, it seemed funny."

"Just an inside joke," you smile fondly as you remember, "it's only funny if you were there, or else I'd let you in on it too."

"That's alright," he hums, though his fingers press a little harder into your side as you walk, "I'm just happy to see you happy."

It's not a lie, either. He does love seeing your smile, but not when it's caused by another cookie. Not when it's treated like some kind of secret he's not meant to see. He tries to remind himself that there's no need to be so immature, but his dough is already warm and his mind spiraling. It took him so very long to come to terms with his feelings for you, he missed out on so much. Where he wasn't, other cookies were, and those cookies took his place in experiences that should've been his. Took smiles that should've been his. Moments he should've shared with you.

You place your hand where he holds you at your waist, turning to give him a warm smile. It warms his heart to know you're caring for him in your own way, but he doesn't want to make you worry. To ease your mind, he presses a kiss to your forehead, offering his own smile up to you. You were with him now, there was no need to worry any longer.

·┆✦ʚ♡ɞ✦ ┆·

Pure Vanilla enjoyed quiet moments with you, especially ones like this. In the garden, surrounded by the white lilies there was nothing more peaceful than that. Your fingers run along their delicate petals as you hum a little tune to yourself, and he enjoys the sight with unbridled delight. His favorite cookie surrounded by his favorite flowers, what a blessing it is on his soul.

There are times where he wishes that every day could be like this. Just you and him in company, taking things nice and slow, soaking in the environment. You turn a little to sneak a glance at him, smiling to yourself when you notice his staring. The shyness cute on your face, something he loves to draw out of you.

Yes moments like these are exactly what he lives fo—

“Y/n Cookie? Are you around?” The familiar voice of Financier Cookie calls amongst the sea of flowers.

You perk up, standing from your spot with a wide smile, “I’m over here with the lilies!”

She comes into view around the corner, normally stern expression softening at the sight of you. Pure Vanilla does not like the look on her face. Still, he holds his tongue, there was no reason to be upset. She was a friend.

“Clotted Cream requests your presence,” She announces, and when you frown she shakes her head, “Nothing serious, he wishes to continue your conversation from yesterday. He’s in he quarters as usual.”

You brighten up, “Oh! I suppose we never did finish talking— ah, but… Pure Vanilla and I were spending some time together.”

He does not frown, though he really wants to. He knows that he could just say no, that you would remain by his side if he asked… but he can’t possibly take up your time when you are wanted elsewhere. It would be unfair to do so over such petty jealousy.

“We see each other every day,” He assures with that same gentle smile, “Go and enjoy yourself. You deserve it.”

You frown a little, “Are you sure?”

Of course he isn’t, “Positive. I’ll see you tonight.”

You hesitate for a moment, glancing at him worriedly, but ultimately wander off to find Clotted Cream. Financier stays back for a moment, watching you with an odd look on her face. The consideration is enough to pique his interest, so he raises his question.

“Is something the matter…?”

“Oh, no, nothing,” She shakes her head, “I would tell you immediately if there was anything to be concerned with.”

“Then why do you look so perplexed?” He asks again.

She seems to consider if telling him the truth is worth it or not. Mulling her options over for a few seconds before sighing, “It’s just a bit… odd to see them here.”

He frowns, “Whatever do you mean? Is there something wrong with the gardens?”

She shakes her head, sighing off some kind of weight, “Well, they’ve told me a few times in passing that they’re… not a fan of while lillie’s. The smell irritates them, if I’m remembering correctly, so it’s surprising to find them surrounded by them.”

“Oh, I wasn’t aware…” He mutters, grip tightening on his staff.

She gives him a small reassuring smile, but it does anything but help, “I’m sure they just forgot to mention it, that’s all.”

“Of course, thank you Financier Cookie,” He hummed with as much sincerity he could muster.

She smiles tightly at him, and then leaves him alone with his thoughts. And think he does, far too much. Not only are you so close with so many cookies, not only did you leave him for Clotted Cream today, but now he learns you don’t even care for his favorite flower? You hadn’t ever mentioned it to him, but you had to other cookies. Wouldn’t something this important be worth talking about with him?

He takes a deep breath, leveling himself out once again. He couldn’t get ahead of himself, knowing that you would never do anything to hurt him purposefully. He couldn’t stop the ache, though. There was so much he did not know about you, so many things he had to learn that other cookies got to hear without asking.

How much time would it take for him to know you the way they did? He burned with jealousy at how easy it was for other cookies to know you, to see you and talk to you with no effort. Each time you were around he felt himself falling apart at the seams, grasping at any little sprinkle of attention you gave him. He could never be so casual with you, not with the effect you had on him, and it made him so jealous to know other cookies had it so easy.

He sighs again, setting his hat down. Not even the lilies were bringing him comfort now, his mood soured yet again. All he could do was sit and seethe until you returned to his side, imagining what you and Clotted Cream might be talking about that was so important to pluck you from his side.

·┆✦ʚ♡ɞ✦ ┆·

It is days of this cycle, which he refuses to break, even when given the chance to a million times. He just can’t find it in himself to step in, not when you seem so happy. Besides, it’s not as though he never sees you. He gets to have you to himself for most of the day, and especially at night.

Still, the annoyance grows in his chest little by little. Without realizing it he distanced himself from you, not wanting to overstep, he decides giving you space is for the best. Yet, he doesn’t realize just how much space he has given you. You begin to miss him, but he always has an excuse for you to go and visit with other cookies.

It feels like he does not want you around, even though he misses you dearly. The conundrum reaches a head when White Lily comes to visit. Being the Faerie Queen now, it was rare she took the time to see her old friend. So when the news of her traveling reached his ears, he cleared all his time to be with her.

You had not seen him since she had arrived, unless you were in your shared room. Even then, you hardly spoke more than a few words. There was an awkwardness there that hadn’t existed only a few days prior, it made your stomach ache. But how could you bring up your concerns when he merely brushed them away, always finding some way to make peace with the situation.

You did not hate White Lily Cookie, she couldn’t not control Pure Vanilla. But the sickness in your dough when you see them together does not go away with any soothing. He talks to her with such ease and knowing, in a way he never did with you. And when he looks at her there is a deep affection that never existed for you.

It makes you hurt. You could never be her, not in a million years. Perhaps that was why he was so distant recently, because he had missed her. Perhaps he wished that you were White Lily Cookie instead.

Despite him seeming oblivious, he was anything but. He was fully aware of the distance he had made between the two of you, and yet… he didn’t know how to fix it. His people pleasing ways had come around to stab him in the back, and he had no idea how to heal the wound inflicted by his own foolish actions.

Not until White Lily’s keen eyes picked up in the tension. She had always been able to read him well, it was why he was so fond of her. She knew him like no other cookie did, and he her. Which is exactly why she was the one to notice how worried he’d seemed.

“You’re tense,” She said simply, taking her seat next to him in the pagoda.

He sighs, “Is it obvious.”

“To me,” She smiles, “Tell me what’s on your mind, friend. It’s rare to see you so worried.”

He frowns at her, all the tension and fear from the week flooding him now that she was confronting it, “I am afraid I may be ruining my relationship.”

She blinks at him, tilting her head, “How would you be doing that?”

After a moments hesitation he lists the ways he has been dealing with the situation. The worry that he will never be close enough to you. The annoyance in his chest when other cookies are chummy with you. The distance he has created to avoid those feeling only making them worse. She smiles through the whole thing, knowingly.

“So… you’re jealous?” She chuckles, leaning forward with a teasing smile.

“I… suppose I am,” He admits, “It’s not as though the feeling is new, but it’s never been so strong…”

She laughs at him again, “Because you are in love, silly. Of course it’s stronger, have you talked to them about it.”

“Well…”

“Pure Vanilla.” She scolds, “Goodness, when will you ever learn. You can’t people please all the time, it’s not good for your health.”

He sighs, nodding along in agreement, “I know, I just don’t know how to bring it up so I deflect. And I’ve been avoiding them since you arrived, I can tell they feel horrible, but I fear I’ve gone too far.”

She hushes him, grabbing his hand in her own, “It’s never too late if the intent is there. I’m sure they’ll understand if you just talk to them. I would.”

“Thank you White Lily,” He smiles genuinely for the first time since she arrived, “I don’t know what I would do without you.”

She smiles warmly at him, squeezing his hand tightly. She always had a way to ease his worries with her words. It was just how well she knew him, she knew just what he needed as always.

A throat clears to the side of them, drawing their attention to it. White Lily reacts first, pulling her hands away from him and offering you a smile.

“Am I interrupting?” You ask, mousy with voice shaking.

“Of course not,” She assures, “We were just talking about you, actually!”

Your expression relaxes a bit, inching forward as if one of them might deny you entry, “Nothing bad I hope…”

“Never,” Pure Vanilla speaks with such warmth that you almost forget how much you’d missed him this whole time, “Please come join us.”

So you do, and you sit and talk with them, and things are nearly normal. Pure Vanilla is back to his usual affectionate self, like nothing ever happened. But you catch the way he and White Lily exchange glances, the way banter comes to them more easily than it ever has to you. They just understood each other in a way you never have, and you couldn’t pretend it didn’t hurt. Especially not after he’d pushed you away so much.

Eventually, White Lily leaves with the excuse of needing rest. Yet, you know it’s to give the two of you space. She’s always been observant and understanding, and you’re grateful for her consideration. When it is just you and Pure Vanilla again, you feel the tension begin to creep back between you. The thick wall of awkwardness wedging between you, and you fear for a moment that this is how it will be forever now. Then, he takes your hands in his, leaning over the table to get closer to you.

“I have to apologize,” He begins, “I have been unfair to you, and we have both suffered because of my actions.”

“Pure Vanilla—“ You want to ease his worries for some reason, tell him it’s alright, but he doesn’t allow you to.

“It took me a very long time to let you in, and because of that I fell short on sharing important moments with you. I’ve found myself… envious of other cookies who take up your time, and I’ve been immature in how I handle it,” He admits, stroking the backs of your hands, “I’ve put too much distance between us, and I can see how much it pains you. I’m so sorry for how I’ve acted, I hope you can find it in yourself to forgive me.”

It takes you a moment of awkward blinking to take in all he said, and while his genuineness is sweet, you can’t help the laugh that bubbles from your stomach. It’s ridiculous when you think about it. He was jealous so he avoided you, and at the same time you were just as jealous of White Lily Cookie. It was silly, and so easily solved, yet neither of you were willing to upset the other. He seems to find the humor in it all too, laughing heartily at your side.

You laugh until your sides hurt and tears are streaming from your eyes. Leaning your full weight on him so you don’t collapse to the floor. When you finally calm, you find it in yourself to admit to your own plight.

“I would be harsh on you, but I’m just as guilty of jealousy.” You sigh, squeezing his fingers in yours.

“What do you have to be jealous of?” He asks, and you almost can’t believe he doesn’t know. It’s so obvious to everyone else around him that he still adores White Lily, everyone but him it seems.

You shake your head in disbelief, “Gosh, you’re so oblivious. You really don’t know how you look at her, do you?”

He shakes his head with a deep frown.

“When you look at White Lily, I can see how much you still love her. I know you would never hurt me or betray me like that, but it does hurt when I see how you treat her. I feel like… maybe you’ll never look at me like that.” You admit, voice small and shaky the longer you go. It was hard to come to terms with how much it hurt, and worse to say out loud to him. He could reject you, pretend your feelings aren’t real.

Instead, he tucks a finger under you chin and forces your eyes on him, “I already do… I just get so embarrassed when you’re looking that I hide it from you.”

He pulls you a little closer, “I still love White Lily, but not in the same way that I love you. You are my whole world, my love. I would never leave you, not for anyone, and I’m sorry I made you worry for even a moment.”

You smile softly at him, leaning into his touch, “Next time, I think we should both just talk about it? All this dodging each other is silly.”

“I agree,” He chuckles, “I much prefer talking to you than not.”

“Very good,” You hum, sliding your arms around his shoulders, “Shall we make it up to each other then?”

His hand tug you closer by your waist, “I think that would be very nice, yes.”

[bibuwaspancaked]

some of y'all act like kaiser didn't literally study psychology to manipulate other people/his teammates to his own benefits.

in the egoist bible, it is said that his hobbies are reading psychology and philosophy and he says that his own strenght is looking down on all other "humans".

his past is meaningful to him and only him and is not an excuse to be manipulative towards others, specially ness. And I mean ness by their first time meeting, where kaiser saw ness as an opportunity to use what he learned against him to start scoring at the BM pro exam, since he wasn't getting any passes from ther other players. I am not talking about what their relationship has grown into after that.

most important, y'all are acting like isagi has any knowledge of kaiser's past like the reader does. as long as we, readers, know, there's no characters that know any of kaiser's past besides kaiser himself and ray dark. isagi manipulated kaiser's game, not his feelings (if anything, he predicted those).

also, even kaiser admits he enjoys seeing other people lose, hurt them and has a thing for faces of despair (info taken by the egoist bible), it would be no different if he was the one winning the bet between him and isagi during the BM vs PXG match, if not worse than isagi was with him.

he even compares himself to his own father, whom has physically abused and beat him countless times; how he "understands" why he used to do all of that to kaiser because, now, he is the one doing it, but in soccer.

kaiser bet everything he had with isagi, and isagi did the same. it would be the end of the other regardlessly of who would win. both of them knew it. it's not isagi's fault kaiser had unadressed feelings towards his past and isagi's soccer made him come to terms with it.

isagi only played the game kaiser accepted to play. isagi only said what kaiser told him once. if anything, kaiser was the one who taught isagi this type of ego, he tasted his own malice.

besides, kaiser was the one who told ness not to follow him anymore. to find a new player to play as a vassel to. exactly because he wanted the restrictiveness and uncertainty of other players. it wasn't on isagi's plans and much less any of his fault. it was a decision made purely from kaiser's egoist feelings. he did it out of his own will.

ness playstyle and passes weren't fit for kaiser's purpose during mid-to-end game. ness gave kaiser freedom to do whatever he wanted, but he knew he would only evolve in a different and uncomfortable environment. that's the future he wanted to his game, and ness obviously wasn't on it, in his point of view. kaiser willingly chose to, as the owner of the post said, "trust" isagi more than "the person who cared about him the most".

and even after that, in the end, ness stil believed in the new kaiser to get his pass. that pass was for the new kaiser, it just happened that kaiser didn't get any better nor new butisagi did it. and did it fast.

so there is no "isagi put kaiser against ness".

kaiser chose to push his past as a reason to keep playng with isagi while isagi only aimed for his own goal. that's what he was taught to do during the 1st and 2nd selection of blue lock, specially during the blue lock vs japan's u-20. that is what blue lock is all about, even.

on chapter 291, not only kaiser, but hiori and yukimiya, too, talk about how isagi brought their egos to it's maximum. that's relevant to bring up because it shows that kaiser is not the only one who isagi "manipulated" into accepting their past. isagi doesn't manipulate people to trust him, he makes them trust themselves to use their full potential to his own game. after all, his main goal still is to be the best striker worldwide.

and even besides all of that, I could just say kaiser was the one who started this beef against isagi and, in the end, lost it due to his own mistakes.

do not play kaiser as a victim when he could easily be the one on the throne.

michael kaiser's downfall is, certainly, the definition of how karma can be a bitch.

I mean no hate to the owner of the post;

I am not aware if the post is meant to be rage bait;

I am no psychologist, I just hope I brought up the obvious;

There is actually a lot I didn't write about, I recognize that. I am not going to since it would take me longer and would get too much for a light discussion (if it's not already);

I am open to discuss and receive any criticism, as long as it is constructive to the discussion;

This post was meant to discuss about how Isagi Yoichi is not the villain some of you want him to be just because he outsmarted your fave.

But seriously, Isagi really said "Thanks for your hard work, greatest clown" to Kaiser??? BROOOOO you literally manipulated him into trusting you and threw him against the one person that cares about him the most this isn’t being a brat or cocky, this is straight-up being an insensitive, psychopathic son of a bitch

(Kaiser just came to terms with his past, faced his deepest emotions, and for the first time in his life actually enjoyed playing football… AND THAT IDIOT RAGE BAIT HIM??? Pls kill isagi in his sleep)

[witchingwithscissors]

Divorce Lawyer Rio/Brewery Owner Agatha + I’m 🍃 = this sapphicy AU thing. Ps I’m an elder millennial so I don’t know how to flip the gif so just imagine they’re seated across from each other in your terror dome.

Rio hadn’t meant to stay this late.

She had only stopped into Cinder & Grain because her usual bar was packed, and she wasn’t in the mood for small talk or lingering stares. She wanted a drink, a quiet corner, and maybe a moment to forget she’d spent the last eight hours in her office breaking apart marriages for a living.

She didn’t expect her.

The bartender. Agatha, according to the embroidered patch on her worn-in T-shirt, moved like she belonged to the space. Effortlessly pouring drinks, laughing at someone’s joke, and running a towel over the bar top with absentminded ease. She had the kind of presence that made people lean in, that made a room feel warmer just by being in it.

And, at some point, her eyes caught Rio’s.

She looked once. Quickly. Then twice. Lingering. And before Rio could pretend not to notice, Agatha was sliding into the booth across from her, elbows resting on the table like they’d done this a hundred times before.

“You’re not a regular,” Agatha said, tapping a finger against Rio’s whiskey glass.

Rio raised an eyebrow. “That obvious?”

Agatha smirked. “Whiskey neat? In a brewery?” She shook her head. “Yeah, that stands out.”

Rio exhaled through her nose, amused. “I don’t do beer.”

“Well, that’s a shame,” Agatha said, leaning back like she had all the time in the world. “I was just about to offer you my favorite one.”

Rio smirked. “Would it change your mind if I said I was allergic?”

Agatha tilted her head, considering. “Not unless you’re actually allergic.”

“I just don’t like it.”

Agatha sighed dramatically, shaking her head. “Tragic.” Then, after a beat, “Let me guess… you’re a lawyer.”

That made Rio pause. “That obvious?”

Agatha grinned. “You have that whole I could argue you out of your own drink order look about you.”

Rio let out a short laugh. “I’d be offended, but you’re not wrong.”

“Lucky guess.” Agatha drummed her fingers on the table, studying her for a second. “Wait! Fuck, hold on.” A flicker of recognition flashed in her expression. “You’re that hot witch lawyer, aren’t you? The one from that billboard a few years ago?”

Rio smirked. “Depends. What do you remember?”

Agatha snapped her fingers. “It had a fucking witch pun… ugh what was it? Something like—”

“Don’t Let Them Hex Half Your Assets.”

Agatha pointed at her, grinning. “That’s the one.”

“Wow,” Rio mused, swirling her drink. “A woman remembers my face… from my shitty divorce ad. That’s a first.”

“I mean, you made an impression.” Agatha smirked. “Some part of me wanted to call just to see if you were actually that dramatic in person.”

Rio lifted a brow. “And?”

Agatha’s gaze flickered lower, slow, deliberate. “Still deciding.”

The way she said it sent something warm through Rio’s chest. No, maybe lower.

This was flirting. Definitely flirting.

Rio should have finished her drink, thanked Agatha for the company, and gone home. She had an early morning conference call she had to be on camera for. But she didn’t go home yet.

Instead, she leaned in slightly, watching the way Agatha tracked her movement. “Alright,” Rio said. “Let’s test something, then.”

Agatha raised an eyebrow. “Test?”

Rio reached for the glass Agatha had brought with her, half-filled with some dark amber brew, the kind that looked deceptively rich and smooth.

She picked it up, took a slow sip, and waited.

The taste hit her tongue. Not bitter like she expected, but something layered, something full, with just the faintest hint of brown butter honey at the end. Good. Really good.

Agatha was watching her closely, eyes flicking to her lips as Rio swallowed.

Finally, Rio set the glass down, tilting her head. “Alright. I’ll admit it.”

Agatha quirked an eyebrow. “Admit what?”

Rio let out a slow, heated breath, voice dipping lower. “I never realized how hungry I was… until I tasted you.”

The words hung between them, heavier than she expected, and for the first time all night, Agatha didn’t have a quick reply.

She just looked at her. Really took her in.

Then, finally, Agatha let out a breathy laugh, shaking her head. “That was fucking smooth.”

Rio smirked. “I know.”

“You always this bold?”

“Only when it works.”

Agatha’s lips twitched. “And what makes you think it’s working?”

Rio leaned in just a fraction more, voice dipping lower. “Because you haven’t looked away from my mouth since I picked up that glass.”

Agatha drew in a sharp breath, hesitation flickering for only a moment before instinct took over. Her fingers slipped around Rio’s wrist, her touch light but possessive, her thumb tracing a slow, teasing stroke over the rapid beat of her pulse.

Rio’s breath hitched.

Agatha didn’t say anything at first, just let her touch linger.

Then, quietly, “Tell me to stop.”

Rio’s fingers twitched, itching to close the space between them entirely. Instead, she tilted her chin, holding Agatha’s gaze steady. “Not a chance.”

And that was it.

Agatha moved first, sliding closer, brushing her lips against Rio’s in a way that wasn’t desperate, wasn’t rushed… just a slow, lingering confirmation of something inevitable.

The kiss was warm, unhurried. Testing. Tasting. Teasing.

Agatha let her fingers trail along Rio’s wrist, anchoring her there. Rio parted her lips slightly, letting her lean in deeper, letting the taste of the beer linger between them.

By the time they pulled apart, Rio was breathless, and Agatha looked entirely too pleased with herself.

“Damn,” Rio muttered.

Agatha exhaled a soft laugh, thumb brushing against Rio’s wrist one last time before letting go. “That’s one way to convert you to beer.”

Rio huffed, shaking her head as she reached for her glass again, lips still tingling. “I’m still not a beer person.”

Agatha smirked, leaning back, her gaze lingering on Rio’s mouth with clear amusement. “Sure you aren’t.”

A charged pause passed between them only long enough for Rio to feel the echo of Agatha’s touch warm against her wrist. She wanted to stay. Wanted to close the distance again. But instead, she grabbed a bar napkin, scribbled something across it, and slid it across the table, letting her fingers brush against Agatha’s one last time.

Agatha waited until Rio was nearly out the door before picking it up. She raised an eyebrow at the neat digits beneath a single name: Rio. Flipping it over, she caught a hint of laughter in her own breath as she read the note scrawled on the back:

“If you’re still deciding, let me know when you’ve made up your mind.”

Her lips curved into a slow, deliberate smile. Rolling the napkin between her fingers, she slipped it into her back pocket, already imagining Rio’s voice on the other end of the line.

Outside, Rio paused on the sidewalk, glancing over her shoulder through the window. Their eyes met in a heated, unspoken promise.

Yeah.

Agatha would definitely be calling.

[sweetdispatch]

https://www.tumblr.com/sweetdispatch/776300941286703104/v-bakery-500-celly

hi can I pls request a 7 piece warm apple pie with passionfruit ice cream and crushed almonds? thank you!

Bad mother - N. Hischier

v' bakery pairing: Nico Hischier x fem!reader summary: After having a baby, you and Nico started trying for another one until your mind was covered in worry warning: NSFW, graphic sex (+18), oral (f receiving)

Two years ago, you and Nico welcomed your first child. It has been the best two years of your and Nico’ life. Your daughter brought a lot of happiness to your life and made you fall in love again with Nico. You two always had been talking about having a big family but when you and Nico started trying for another kid, you became scared. 

You played along, acting like you still want it but deep down, the kid made you change your mind. You felt like a bad mother and started overthinking every little mistake you’ve made. All the worries were pointless because you were the best mother for your daughter but you were scared that with a new kid, you might abandon the older one. 

One day, Nico returned home and placed a loving kiss on your lips. Your daughter was already asleep so you two had a night for each other. He started roaming his big hands on your body and you pulled from him. This move alarmed him that something’s off with you. 

“What happened?” Nico asked you to look at your face and read every emotion from it. 

“I’m scared Nico” There was no turn back. You took a deep breath and continued. “I’m scared to get pregnant again. I’m scared that with the new kid, I’ll forget about our daughter and won’t be a good mother for her. I was thinking about this lately since you brought up the conversation and I already feel not good enough for her” 

Nico looked at you with worry written on his face. He felt like he failed you in showing that you’re the best mother for your kid. His mind couldn’t understand why you are thinking this way about yourself. For him, you were a wonderful mother and wanted to have more kids with you. 

“Where is this coming from? You're a great mother so what’s with the worries?” Nico asked you and placed his hands on your waist. 

“I don’t want to be responsible for ruining our kid because we have another…” Before you could continue, Nico put a finger on your lips to make you stop talking. When you closed your mouth, he spoke.

“You’re prettier with your mouth shut, especially when you’re saying nonsense like you just did. You’re wonderful mother to our daughter and another kid won’t change it. Yes, your focus will be on the newborn but you’ll never abandon our daughter. Let me show you how much I adore you for everything you’re doing” Nico pulled you into a kiss and carried you into a bedroom. 

Nico sat down on the bed and you sat down on his knees. Gently, he took off your shirt and started admiring your breast in a bra. He went lower with his kisses, placing them on your jawline and neck. You threw your head so he could have a better access. Your hands went into his hair and slightly you pulled them. 

Softly, Nico placed you on a bed so you could lay on your back. He started going lower with kisses, whispering cute and meaningful things to you. With every word, you were blushing like crazy. Nico always made sure you felt good but today, he was worshipping you. He took off your sweatpants and panties in one, motion move. He placed one last kiss on your belly and gently spread your legs apart. 

No matter how many times Nico saw you naked, it always amazed him how amazing a body you have especially after giving birth. For him, you were the prettiest and hottest woman alive. He stopped his moves and looked at you for a minute. 

“I could look at you whole day and whole night and never get bored of this view. I mean, wow. You look absolutely insane and only for my eyes” Nico said and kneeled in between your legs. 

Nico started placing kisses on your inner thighs before he kissed your pussy. He was delicate in his moves, and didn't want to rush things. Just wanted to show you how wonderful a woman you are and all your worries are pointless. He took the time with you. He didn’t want to just give an orgasm. He wanted you to feel appreciated. 

It was an act full of love. You felt his every touch on you. You became a mess under him and were moaning like crazy. Nico knew all your sweet spots and wanted to give you the most pleasure he could. He was eating you out and your hands went into his hair. You were slightly pulling them while enjoying this like never. All your worries were long forgotten. Now, it was all about you and him. 

Nico added a finger into you to bring you closer to the edge. He was well aware that you won’t last long and wanted to give you the most. His other hand was firmly laying on your thigh so you couldn’t close them. You arched your back from the pleasure. Not long after, you cum around his lips. You felt drained from the energy. 

You tried to catch your breath when Nico lied next to you and pulled you closer to hug you. You two laid like that for a couple of minutes until he spoke. 

“I don’t want you to feel forced to have another kid. If you’re not ready, I understand it but please, never say that you’re a bad mother. I couldn’t picture anyone better as a mother for our kid” Nico softly said. You smiled at his words. 

“I want another one but maybe not now. Can we wait a little longer until I settle down with my emotions?” You asked him, already knowing the answer. 

“Always” Nico kissed your cheek. “Now, go to sleep. It’s already after your bedtime” He joked and you cuddled him.

[stuckonmark]

accidents. mark lee

19. road trip fun

you had no clue what you were in for. a random ski trip didn’t sound too bad, but of course mark being there changed things. while you were packing, winter was yapping about how excited she was. winter and haechan had planned the trip together, so they had a lot of bonding activites for everyone.

everyone had slowly started making their way to your dorm. the boys helped put everyone’s luggage into the trunk. seeing mark definitely made you uncomfortable. you couldn’t explain the feeling, but you just wanted to be chill and didn’t want to ruin the vibe for everyone.

“alright everyone! let’s hop in the car and get this trip started!” haechan was holding onto his stuffed animal, as he screamed in excitement.

“wait what’s the seating arrangement?” jaemin asked, as everyone gathered towards the car. “well i decided that jeno drives because he’s good at it and jaemin will be his right hand man for directions. it makes sense for the girls to sit in the middle because y’know, they’re the tiniest, which leaves me and mark in the back.” everyone agreed and were about to get in before haechan stopped everyone. “but unfortunately, i do get motion sickness, so yn, would you be a dear and sit in the back with mark.”

haechan was batting his eyelashes at you, while everyone had awkwardly looked back at you, obviously knowing some odd tension was going on between you and mark. “uh yeah, it’s fine.” as much as you didn’t want to sit with mark, you just wanted everyone to have fun. it’s not like you and mark would have to talk the whole ride. it shouldn’t be a big deal.

you and mark climbed into the back seat and placed your things by your feet. everyone followed suit and then y’all were on the road. the car ride started off with singing sessions and laughter, but that was not enough to keep y’all energized for a three hour car ride. eventually, everyone began to doze off, jaemin having small talk with jeno up front to keep him awake, haechan snoring on winter’s shoulder, and karina watching a kdrama with her noise cancelling headphones.

you were too busy texting eric to see what mark was doing. you and eric had been texting for a few days and getting to know each other. you were starting to grow a liking for eric. he was sweet and fun to talk to. you hadn’t noticed, but mark was taking a glance at your phone to see what was making you smile from ear to ear.

“who are you texting?” mark asked, nudging your shoulder.

you scooted away from him and glared at him. “nobody.” you turned your body away from him, so that your back was facing him. you didn’t know it, but mark was feeling an odd feeling that he’d never felt before. he wanted to know what was so special about this eric guy.

you had finally reached your destination after three hours. although everyone had been half asleep in the car, everyone was filled with excitement and awe when they saw the ski resort. “damn, haechan. your dad is loaded.” everyone quickly grabbed their things and headed inside. there were three rooms inside: jeno and jaemin shared a room with two twin beds, mark and haechan got the room with the queen sized bed, and you, winter, and karina got the master bedroom with the king sized bed.

“wouldn’t it make sense that i get the master bedroom since this is MY dad’s ski resort-” winter had smacked haechan’s head before he got to finish his sentence. “oh get over it. it’s better to be a gentlemen.”

the night was filled with so much fun. you guys had started to grill meat and brought out the drinks. sitting on the floor together and eating felt more “homey” to y’all. this trip was starting to feel fun. it got your mind off mark.

“alright, it’s not a party if we’re not playing truth or drink~” haechan was too excited to keep his composure. he was the one starting all of the fun. at this point, everyone was starting to get a little hammered and tipsy. “hmm, jeno what’s your body count?” karina’s question sent ooo’s all around the room. jeno just shook his head and laughed. “or how about this, can you count your body count on both hands.” he took a second to think before he downed a shot, causing everyone to holler. “it’s not that bad..” “THEN WHY DIDN’T YOU SAY IT!”

“okay, okay mark, who’s the last person you hooked up with?” haechan asked, as his face was red from the shots he was taking. it was evident that he was very drunk. the question left an awkward silence in the room and mark sent haechan a death glare, before he downed his drink.

“boo, you loser. everyone knows it was m-” jaemin hit haechan with a pillow, while everyone kind of glanced at you. of course it was embarrassing. everyone knew you and mark had something going on, and it pissed you off that haechan was instigating. you could feel mark looking at you and you were feeling uncomfortable. all you wanted to do was curl up in a ball and die, but you didn’t want to ruin the mood. you decided to just take a shot. “c’mon, why are you guys being so lame?”

the night carried on with lots of karaoke and many drinks. you decided to let it take over you completely, trying to distract yourself from your real feelings about mark. at this point, you had no idea what was going on. all you knew was that someone was taking you into your room.

“ugh, mark. get off of me. i can walk by myself-” mark had caught you before you fell onto the floor. “just let me help you, yn.” he helped you get into bed and sat down next to you. “why are you even here, mark?” you were slurring your words. “why do you always take care of me? why are you so nice to me, but all you do is go around and hook up with people.” mark was left in silence and you scoffed. “you’re so confusing and i can never read you. you’re too busy with other girls anyways.” you looked towards mark, as he was looking right back at you.

“why don’t you like me, mark?” you looked into his eyes and down towards his lips, as you leaned closer to him. mark was completely flustered at the question, but before he could answer, you had fallen back onto the bed, sound asleep and pulling mark down with you.

previous — m.list — next

notes. this chapter was a little inspired by that one scene in x.o kitty 😭 the cringiness in the show makes it so good 💔 also accidents will be wrapping up pretty soon 🥲

taglist. open! @mmjhh1998 @haluenx @urlocalbeaner5 @cloudmrk @dudekiss3r @iluv7tn @jae-n0 @kikookii @remgeolli @lyleo @wumutititititi @kittydollzz @nctdreamchaser @kodasity @sibwol @worldwidecutiemaya @bbykaixx @luvsooby @luvvhaechan @awktwurtle @gomdoleemyson @morkiee @orangenbluetenbaum @fairyoflia @mxnhoeuwu

[cy-cyborg]

Please remember I am trans/nonbinary, my pronouns are xe/they.

I am starting to get genuinely annoyed with people’s shocked or doubtful reactions to hearing I want to have kids in the near-ish future. And I don’t mean strangers. Strangers say weird things to me all the time lol. I mean my family, my doctors, people who have known me for decades.

My mum in particular has made several comments now ranging from just genuine shock at the mention my partner and I are planning for kids during a conversation about plans for the future (I’ve literally talked about wanting kids to her since I was a kid) to outright saying during a casual conversation that “they (referring to doctors) probably wouldn’t let me carry to term”. Over Christmas my partner also told mum that we had some news we wanted to share in person, and her first reaction was “Cy’s not pregnant are they?” My partner said no and she responded with “oh thank god!”

My sister and dad have also made similar comments. Dad has brought up valid concerns (mainly about some genetic stuff that caused complications for my mum) sprinkled with the same ableism my mum always goes to. My sister I’m willing to give a bit more leniency, since she’s the only family member I talk about my transition with and she admitted recently she thought i was already medically transitioning and she thought that made you infertile so she just assumed kids were off the table. Neither of those things are true but her doubts at least aren’t tied to my disability, just bad info.

But it’s the doctors (and other healthcare professionals) that are the most frustrating. It’s not one or two. It’s nearly every doctor. Every nurse. Every medical technician. If the subject comes up, they all have something to say about it.

I don’t want to go into pregnancy blind, I know I would be at higher risk than the average pregnant person and I want to know what those risks are before I agree to them. I want to know what recourses are available. I want to know how me being in a wheelchair will change the process of things like giving birth. I want make sure the local hospital is equip to deal with that and I won’t be having to educate people while I’m in labour or if I’m better off going somewhere else.

But every doctor I’ve tried to discuss the subject with has shut the topic down and hand waved it with “we’ll cross that bridge if we get to it”. Like it’s something I’d obviously want to avoid that I probably don’t need to worry about. Even trying to get my contraceptive replaced, get a fertility test done or even getting a damn pap smear has been a nightmare. why am I fighting to get a Pap smear??? I’m nearly 30 and still haven’t been able to get one because several doctors seem to be under the impression I’m not sexually active, even when I bring my partner into the appointment. If they say it out loud (half the time they dance around the subject) and I correct them, they are genuinely shocked, then tell me we’ll worry about that later. Nurses and other healthcare providers are no better. There’s been several occasions where I haven’t been asked the mandatory “could I be pregnant” question when going for X-rays or CT scans (and I know they were supposed to ask because if I ask to see the paperwork, it’s always there and they’ve just checked “no” without asking), or if I am asked at intake, they say something to the effect of “I know the answer is probably no, but is there any chance you could be pregnant?”

Though I take back what I said earlier, there’s one comment from strangers on this front that pisses me off, and it’s “be thankful you don’t have to deal with being pestered about having kids”.

No, I won’t be thankful when my reproductive health is ignored, my family are telling me constantly they think I shouldn’t have kids or expressing surprise that I’m even “allowed to” and I can’t even get any answers about what it would look like if I DO get pregnant. My heart goes out to the people who are harassed and pressured into having kids, and to the people whose health is ignored for the sake of them being able to have a baby. Both my mother and sister have dealt with that, my mum almost died because they didn’t want to do anything that would prevent her from having more kids she didn’t want after my younger sister was born. But BOTH things are terrible and shouldn’t be happening!

Im not unreasonable, if someone brought up a decent, genuine concern to me that wasn’t just “can someone in a wheelchair even look after a kid” or “I didn’t think someone like you even has sex” I would reconsider. If it was found I would be likely to experience serious complications for myself or the baby, I would reconsider. If I found out I wasn’t going to have the needed supports to raise a kid, I would reconsider. But everyone assumes that’s what I want. If I were infertile, or any of these things were true, I’d reconsider, but I’d be upset about it! I’ve always wanted to be a parent and if that was something that wasn’t actually possible, I would be sad about it.

But my family members talk to me about it in the same way they did when I was 10 and didn’t know where babies came from, doctors are shocked at the idea I’m even sexually active let alone thinking about children. I’m genuinely worried the people in my life other than my partner would treat any fertility issues like a good thing, or be shocked that I’d be upset if kids weren’t actually on the table anymore.

[blissfullylankartz]

the oddworld fandom don’t really want to interact with you because you don’t care about oddworld. compared to other fandoms we’re tiny and the games don’t get enough love anyway so it feels borderline disrespectful. if it’s not your thing why are you even making ocs for it?

I literally made a post saying not to pull this shit, I said I would be taking anon asks as long as people were kind. Yet once again I'm being met with being pushed out of a community I was wanting to get to know about. Being told I don't care when I'm literally still new and learning things. So people apparently can only partake in a community if they only know every little detail about it?

Look if you have an issue with me I'd rather you not be hiding behind anon, it feels incredibly uncomfortable and disrespectful that you would cross a boundary I set in place. The anon asks was to allow people to send asks comfortably, but you keep ruining it for everyone with me needing to turn them off because you don't have the balls to come out and say stuff without hiding behind anon. You make me believe the community is unkind and unwelcoming, when I don't want to believe that because some of the people I have interacted with have been wonderful.

You don't get to dictate what I take interest in and how I enjoy those things. So just leave me alone or at least stop hiding behind anon, it isn't fair on anyone else that you keep doing this. I won't be switching anon off because I put it on to allow people to be comfortable. I didn't put it on to allow you to feel comfortable being unwelcoming, if your going to stand up for what you love then stop hiding. Or are you afraid that if people knew who was doing it that they wouldn't like you as much anymore, since it's a small community alot of people seem to know each other. I doubt it would be fun to find out that someone was going out of Thier way to shun people from a community they apparently care about.

If you love something wouldn't you rather want to share it and talk about it, not being hateful and pushing people away from it.

I'm tired of this, this was a shitty thing to just wake up to.

Edit: anon has apologised for their behaviour however decided not to post a response to that because I don't want to give them more attention than necessary. This will be the last thing I'll be adding to this situation. I've blocked them from being able to send anon asks anymore, this is because they broke a couple of boundaries and have done things that I'm really not comfortable with. Also just didn't enjoy the vibes being brought to the table. Just hope a lesson has been learnt here.

Thank you for all the kindness that everyone has shown to me, I was a little surprised by the amount of responses, but I'm glad the community seems to take these things seriously. Don't worry I'm not going anywhere and my asks are still open and yous are free to send asks as anons. Just be kind and respectful<3 eventually I may make a post with all the ocs on it that are available for asks once I've brushed up more on lore. I look forward to doing more with yous <3

[tearsaura]

No need no use pt. 2 // Eris Vanserra x healer!reader

A/N: Thank you so so much for all the nice feedback on part one. I am so glad that you liked it so much!

Word count: 1K

Warnings: talk of death, injuries, angst

Heaven smelled like cinnamon and pine. Delicious.

I was lying, or floating, on soft clouds and felt no pain anymore. Death wasn't as bad as everyone made it out to be. For the people that lost someone, sure, but in my case, there was no one that lost me. Maybe I should open my eyes. Am I going to see all my dead relatives?

Footsteps appeared suddenly and I felt a presence, the smell of cinnamon and pine becoming stronger, as I felt the clouds under me dipped.

“Are you awake, love?”

No.

No there is no way.

I opened my eyes and stared right at the newly appointed High lord of the autumn court. And last time I checked, he was very much alive, which meant that I was too.

“What are you doing here?” Eris looked at me cautiously, his usual taunting smile inapparent. “What am I doing here?” “What do you remember?” he asked, completely disregarding my questions. Huffing, I thought back.

There was Cassian’s injury, his bones sticking out.

Azriel yelling at me, holding me down.

Leaving the house, going to the woods.

“You found me outside of Velaris.” I stated and Eris nodded. “I brought you back to autumn and had my healers take care of you.” “Why didn’t you bring me to the night court?” “If you wanted to be there, you wouldn’t have been walking away from them.” He replied. “What happened?”

I didn’t know what it was, I think my near-death experience loosened my tongue, but I told him everything. How I wanted to belong in the night court, even about my unrequited feelings for Azriel. How he grabbed my hand and held it down to heal Cassian, how none of them said anything or even cared when I walked out. Eris didn’t interrupt me, listening cautiously. The more I talked, the more I wanted to bawl my eyes out. There where no words to describe how hurt I was, how betrayed I felt. It has reached to the point that I even shared it all with a person that I didn’t necessarily like that much.

“And the worst part is, I deserve this. I never had a place to belong, and I’ll never will” I finished, silent tears running down my cheeks. At this point, I didn’t care that I was crying to the worst possible person I could be crying to because Eris, as bad as he can be, showed me more empathy and basic respect than any of my so-called family ever did by bringing me here and healing me back to life.

“It is astonishing how the night court doesn’t have any basic knowledge, but not surprising.”

“Really? This is, all you are going to say about this?”

“I could go on and on about how none of them deserved to be in your presence to begin with, how none of them deserved even a single thought of yours going towards them but I do not think that will help you at this moment. The night court doesn’t know that you’re here. Do you want to keep it that way or shall I bring you back there to tear them apart?” He asked, his cunning smile making his way back on his face. There he is.

“I don’t want to talk to them.” I said, suddenly feeling tired again.

“Should I inform them?” he asked, and I shook my head. “Why did you bring me here. What do you want from me?” I whispered, looking towards the ceiling.

“I thought you where dying.” My eyes snapped back to him. Eris held my gaze as he continued: “You were wandering around and sobbing, clutching your shoulder. I had an idea what had happened because I knew how the healers’ powers work.” He whispered back. He wore this sad look in his eyes, and I immediately wanted to grab his hand for some reason. To console him.

“You should rest, and we can talk after about where you want to go. I have no bad intentions I swear.” He said to which I only nodded absently, feeling my eyes growing heavier before I drifted back to sleep.

“You were asleep for about three days” Eris told me as we walked through the woods of his home later that evening. I needed fresh air and Eris decided to accompany. There was so much that I was feeling and yet I felt… numb. Where was I supposed to go now, what am I going to do?

“Have you eaten something?” Eris questioned, breaking the silence. I nodded.

“How’s your shoulder feeling?” “Good”

“How are you feeling?” “I have no where to go now” I blurted out. Eris came to a halt, turning to look at me. “What do you mean?” “I have been with the night court pretty much my whole life now. I do not know any other home.” I started, avoiding his gaze. “And now, I can’t and won’t go back there but I don’t know where to go. These where the only people I knew.”

His hand reached out to my face, pulling my chin up. I looked at him, his face didn’t betray any emotions. His eyes bore into me as I bit my lip. He was devastatingly beautiful.

“You can stay here of course.” He finally said, making my breath hitch. “I don’t want to impose” “You aren’t imposing. I am offering. It’d be my honour to have you here.” I bit my lip, hesitating. “Maybe I can offer my healing powers in exchange?” I suggested, to which he quickly shook his head. “Absolutely not. If you want, you can help my healers out with knowledge only, but I won’t have you risk your life for anyone.” He said sternly. “But-” “No buts. You can stay here as long as you want, and you won’t be a burden to me.”

“You don’t even know me”

“I know you enough”

I didn’t respond. I couldn’t. Eris held out his arm to me and I held onto him as we continued our walk. We didn’t speak much after that, making our way back to his home. Well, I guess mine now too, at least for the time being.

And suddenly, my fall out with the night court didn’t seem bad at all.

-----

Taglist:

@celestialgilb

[notapradagurl7]

Ties That Bind. Part Four.

Black Fem! Plus Size/Reader x Billionaire!Terry Richmond.

Summary: You finally made to easy part of the wedding, creating your vision and Terry’s while there were a few disasters here and there. But you weren't talking to him and Terry knew that you couldn't resist a sweet treat. He decided to cheer you up and talk to you.

| chapter three.

Word Count: 1168k.

Warnings: mostly fluff, no smut, a sweet and protective Terry, reader getting spoiled, and loved, and worshipped, cute yet short fic, Terry feeding the reader strawberries while wanting to eat her out.

A/N: here is part four of the mini-series, hope you enjoy it! My apologies for putting this on the shelf but I'm back with it now, Don't forget to leave a like, comment & reblog to support, or you can always ask for a request, enjoy! 🫡❤️

Taglist: @megamindsecretlair @satoruya @planetblaque @playgurlxoxo @dabratzchronicles @becauseimswagman1 @pocketsizedpanther @beenathembo @brattyfics @hxneyclouds @yassbishimvintage @nahimjustfeelingit-writes @nayaesworld @ovohanna24 @novahreign @writingsbytee @avoidthings @kimuzostar @slippinninque @keyera-jackson @theblacklewinsky @euphorichappiness10

@life-in-the-slut-house @miguelspvssy @kaylaahisthebestest- @tforpresz @uniqueoutlierblog

@dxddykenn @dpennedit

@secretlifeoofmarpessa @mymindisneverhere

@mind-somewhere-else

@kindofaintrovert

@5starr-staciii @blyffe @enchantedillumination @kaylalb @mogul93 @uzumaki-rebellion @saturnville @chaoticcoffeequeen

@musicisme333 @rawflwrs

————-

You stood in front of the unfinished wedding location, the hues of red and bright yellow-is, similar to shimmering fire on the hardwood on a camping trip. Catching the glimpses of the people who carefully moved the wooden chairs with the soft plush cushions on them, placing them in between certain spaces.

Stopped by Terry’s command once he spoke up and held up his hand, as if he was a king in a towering castle, ready to send the bravest knights out there to war to defend his honor, defend you.

The soft sound of violins string strumming their best chords, gave you a sweet song.

You could felt the energy flowing from Terry, a commanding yet gentle energy. His green-blue-ish flickering on you, as if he could see your soul.

Terry has been giving you a worried look since this morning, you weren’t talking to him but he gave your space, still it hurts him. You didn’t mean to hurt him like that.

“You good? You’ve been quiet since this morning baby,” Terry brought up, those striking eyes locked on your brown eyes.

“No, not really, this is usually the day that women are happy about but..I don’t feel happiness yet,

“Is it because of your family?” He asked, as if he read your mind.

Honestly you longed for the surcease of the wedding, to finally bask in the love that Terry given you, the care, the reassurance. Everything you needed in between.

“There’s that but I'm over it now, I just want everything to be perfect Terry,” You trailed off, looking back at the tall man with his fawn light skin.

Terry knew exactly what to do to make you feel better, he held a heart-shaped candy box and passed it to you, your eyes flickered toward it and your face lit up.

“Oh shit, you still remembered that I love chocolate-covered strawberries with vanilla icing?” You exclaimed with a smile.

Terry hummed and nodded in response, “Yup, from your favorite black-owned chocolate shop downtown. I figured a little sweetness might help brighten your day.”

Your heart fluttered at the thoughtfulness behind his gesture. You took the box from him, your fingers brushing against his as you opened it. The sight of the chocolate-covered strawberries, glistening with a drizzle of vanilla icing, made your mouth water.

“Terry, you spoil me,” you said, a grin spreading across your face.

“Only the best for my queen,” he replied, a smirk dancing on his lips.

You took one of the strawberries and held it up to his lips. “Here, try one.”

Terry leaned in, his eyes locked onto yours as he took a bite, savoring the flavor. “Mmm, delicious, but I think you are the sweetest thing here,” he said, his voice low and seductive.

You felt the heat rise to your cheeks at his compliment. “You always know what to say to make me blush, don’t you?”

“Only when it’s the truth, and I've got a few more truths to share with you Y/N,” he replied, leaning closer, his breath warm against your skin.

“Like what?” you asked, teasingly.

“Like how beautiful you look today, even with all the stress of wedding planning, and I can't wait to call you my wife,” he said, his gaze softening.

A shiver ran down your spine at his words, the intimacy of the moment made your heart race. “You really mean that, don’t you?”

“Absolutely,” Terry answered, his voice firm. “You are everything to me, and I just want to make you happy.”

“I know you do, and I'm so grateful for you,” you murmured, leaning in closer to him, your heart swelling with emotion.

Terry’s hand found yours, intertwining your fingers, his thumb gently rubbing against your knuckles. “How about we take a break from all this chaos? Just you and me, enjoying these strawberries and each other.”

You nodded, feeling a rush of affection for him. “Sounds perfect.”

As you both settled onto a nearby bench, Terry took another strawberry, but instead of eating it himself, he held it up to your lips. “Open up,” he said playfully.

You laughed, complying as he fed you the sweet treat. “Mmm, that’s heavenly,” you said, your eyes sparkling.

Terry chuckled, leaning in closer to you. “You know, I could think of another way to enjoy strawberries.”

Your heart raced at the implication, a teasing smile creeping onto your lips. “Oh really? And how would that be?”

“Well, I could take my time while letting you feel everything as I make love to you, he began, his voice dropping an octave as he leaned in even closer.

The heat flared in your cheeks again as his words sunk in, your breath hitching at the thought. “Terry, you can’t just say things like that.”

“Why not? I want you to know how much I desire you, I want to worship every part of you, baby.” he said, his eyes darkening with intent.

“Maybe we should finish the wedding planning first,” you suggested, a teasing smile on your lips despite your racing heart.

Terry chuckled, leaning back slightly but still holding your gaze. “You’re right. But just know, once this wedding is over, I’m going to make sure you feel just as special as you are to me.”

Your heart swelled at his words, warmth flooding through you as you shared this, sweetness, and undeniable chemistry with the man who would soon be your husband.

“Promise?” you asked softly.

“Promise,” he replied, sealing it with a gentle kiss on your lips, the taste of strawberries lingering between you as you both melted into love.

The way things were going so far, was great. Both of you were so close to the day of your wedding, you decided for a short knee-length dress since you didn't want to trip.

———————

[evil-sm-confessions]

we need a list of spooky month characters who can say faggot

Brought this question to my expert team of scholars. Discussion under cut.

🦴: All of them

⚡️: nod nod

🦴: Except Skid, Pump and Lucky

🦴: Because they’re bapies

⚡️: They can reclaim it when they're older

⚡️: Anyone else have input on this

🦠: evermore can reclaim it but uses it as a slur. also uses the term pansy. garcia uses it as a term of endearment. streber and dexter use it as a power word. radford once said "whats good my fags!" and got laughed out of the room. jaune doesnt say faggot but she does say dyke, and often at that. candy dealer doesnt say faggot but he refers to gay men as fairies which isnt neccesarily better. frank can say faggot but usually defaults to homo. bob says faggot with his whole chest and for like multiple years nobody knew if he could reclaim it or not but were too scared to ask.

⚡️: YES yes this is all good

⚡️: Kevin can reclaim it but doesn't

🌸: Jack can but doesnt like using slurs

🦠: also fun fact from looking at the wikipedia article for queer slang, a derogatory term for gay men is "fudge packer" and in like sm3 i think when the kids give kevin the sugar and hes tweaking out he says "theyre gonna pack my fudge in jail its all over" which. i dont know if it was intentional but i find it so funny that like the first thing kevin thought when he had a possibility of being arrested was being made to have gay prison sex like buddy do we not have more pressing matters to worry about

⚡️: HSHABDHFHD

⚡️: John says faggot not as a slur but in the way one would say "a gay man" neutrally

⚡️: Someone needs to tell him that's not the politically correct term/silly

🐍: YEAH

🐍: I agree

🦠: john talking to radford and hes like "oh is that kevin friend of yours a faggot too?" and radfords like "H- uncle can you sa- oh wait yeah no you can say that- but hold on-"

🐍: Captain and Shotgun man can say faggot. We been know this.

🐍: Father gregor wouldnt say it. Moloch would call Gregor a Faggot

⚡️: And Gregor would be like "you can NOT say that"

⚡️: Half convinced shotgun man uses faggot as a label ngl

🦠: oh no they do

🦠: sexuality and gender

🦠: "oh are you trans?" "yeah im a faggit :)"

⚡️: Skiddad uses faggot as a slur but only on people who are into it

🦠: ignacio uses it like half as a slur but also usually likes to get creative with it. he will call you words you didnt even know

🌸: ignacio has invented slurs

🦠: HE HAS

⚡️: He calls himself a faggot but when he's calling YOU slurs he pulls out the real deep cuts

⚡️: He's gay but the second a gay man inconveniences him he's getting homophobic

🦠: guy whod call someone a slur theyve never even heard before and then grab their face hard af and start hate-smooching

⚡️: KAHSVDDKJDBF

⚡️: Hope asked Jack "what's a faggot" and he almost chokes on the donut he was eating

🌸: Jack explains it in the most kid friendly way possible and then it’s just

⚡️: "So my daddy's a faggot?"

🌸: YEAH

⚡️: Costume guy uses tranny as a slur but only when she's talking about herself

🐍: NOOO dont do thattttt...

⚡️: She's doing that

🦆: consider: Skiddad teaching Skid to call people that

⚡️: OH MY GOD

⚡️: Gotta drive home but do continue to discuss if you'd like

🦠: skiddad would exclusively refer to himself as either a transvestite or a tranny but has like never once actually used the term transgender. skid meeting the hatzgang like "wow roy youre a tranny?" full confidence happy for them

🐍: LJKASDHKJFGHGHJD

🐍: Roy would see red i think

🦠: roy would no-hesitation hit skid upside the head if im being real like "WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST CALL ME-"

🦠: jaune saying dyke in public and ross is next to her like "mom *please*"

🦠: jaune would refer to aaron as a stud specifically in the lesbian way

🐍: Real shit

🌸: ...

🌸: transmasc butch lesbian aaron.

🦠: YES

🦠: YES

🦠: 🌸 YOURE SO SMART

🦠: going off ⚡️'s headcanon that jaune is cis but got a mastectomy bc she didnt want them any more. consider. transmasc aaron that still has his bonkers bc he doesnt give a shit lmfao

⚡️: I'm back

⚡️: You guys are smark

🐍: REAL SHIT

⚡️: Is there anything else you guys want to add

🐍: the eyes of the universe knows slurs from other dimensions and will say them all if the time is right

🦠: hmmm... rick exclusively uses the word faggot. michelle would not say faggot but she would call someone "a nice young man" or "a bit fruitful" or call them a dandy. thin thief occasionally says fag, fat thief said it like once and visibly made a distraught face. also cannot say the word gay he just beats around the bush and jibberjabbers. roy says faggot no questions asked.

🐍: Skiddad knows a handful and uses them

⚡️: Roy calls Ross and Robert fags and it's fine because they're all queers

🦠: fag and her faglets

🦠: jaune keeps trying to give ross the dyke pass and hes like "mom i am not fucking saying that" /silly

⚡️: BDHAKDBDHSJDNF

⚡️: He says faggot though

⚡️: Robert theoretically can say faggot but he doesn't

⚡️: Susie can say dyke but doesn't because she's in the closet

🦠: susie on call with robert and he shows her a helltaker girl and she says "oh im gonna lez out" and then the call goes dead fucking silent and she has her head in her hands with an expression of shock and repulsion and then robert starts laughing so hard he has to hit his inhaler

🐍: KJHGFKJHF

⚡️: BSHSJDHDBDJNDNDHF

⚡️: That's how Robert learns she's gay

[losers-clvb]

talk too much // soldier boy

pairing: soldier boy x female!reader

summary: sometimes you talk too much.

content: yapper reader, talk of sex because this is ben we're talking about, old man coded ben, age gap kind of mentioned but you could ignore it, slight ooc ben maybe, fluff

word count: 1k

note: this fits into the universe with the reader from "it will come back" but could definitely be read on its own. this is inspired by the song "talk too much" by queen renee rapp and myself because i am a yapper by nature.

masterlist

----

You were making that face again. The one you made when you were having a silent conversation with yourself, or when you were listening to those smut audiobooks you seemed to love so much. Taking in your lack of headphones, Ben went for the former option.

You and Ben had been having a normal -- or as normal as you could possibly get with an over one-hundred year old supe -- morning, complete with fresh-brewed coffee and omelets made by you. When he had swiped up the morning paper you had brought in for him, you knew he wanted to be left alone to read the headlines. Well, left alone with the occasion scoff of “fuckin’ pussies” at a particularly progressive story.

You were happy to sit next to him and read along. You had gotten comfortable being in his presence after the many months together. You were something of a couple, though it had never been said out loud by either of you. You both just eased into it.

Somewhere between a story on the local shelter hosting a bake sale and a murderer at large you had zoned off, eyes floating to the floor. You were thinking too much again.

Ben watched you out of the corner of his eyes, pursing his lips when you made a face of disgust. It was quickly replaced with a pout and your eyes narrowed. Okay, enough of this. He couldn’t take it anymore.

“What’s on your mind, doll?” Ben asked, pulling the newspaper taut to keep it from folding over. You shot your attention to him, looking up at him with wide eyes that told him you knew you had been caught.

“Nothing.” You answered quickly, nestling into his side. You hoped this would distract him, make him think more about your hand brushing against his bicep rather than your ability to overthink.

“You were obviously thinkin’ about something.” He argued, squinting his eyes at a black-and-white picture of a giraffe. You scrunched your nose at him and he was tempted to kiss the pout off your face.

“How do you know I was thinking? Maybe I was just staring at the wall.” You defended. It was a weak argument. Ben had gotten to know you too well, much more than you had gotten to know him, thanks to your near constant flow of words to him. You just liked talking and most times he was happy to listen.

“That mind’s always running, sweetheart.” He smirked and tapped a finger on the side of your head. You tried to duck away, but the action only resulted in your head bumping against his shoulder.

“It is not. I can have an empty brain.” You knew it was a lie. Even when you were sleeping you were still thinking of something.

“Only time it’s empty is when I get you all cockdrunk. Now,” Ben raised his eyebrows, “what were you thinking about?”

You would have argued back, but you knew it was true. He knew all the right buttons to push to get you all but babbling nonsense at him while he fucked you. You dropped your eyes to the table.

“Well,” you started, stalling, “I was trying to figure out if I like you.” You realized exactly what you had said after it came out, your mouth running faster than your brain. You whipped your head back to look at him. He was giving you a confused look and you felt the need to explain yourself.

“Not that I don’t like you. I just don’t know if I like like you. Well, I do like like you, but maybe I could like like like you, you know?” You sputtered out. Ben opened his mouth to talk, but you beat him to it.

“No, you probably don’t. Did people talk like this in the forties? Or wait, the eighties? What time are you from? Oh my gosh, you’re old. What would people think about us together?”

Then you suddenly looked horrified.

“What would my mother think about us?” You quickly moved into contemplation. “I mean, I don’t care too much what she thinks. She can be a bitch sometimes.” Immediate regret.

“Not a bitch!” You blurted out. “She’s not a bitch!” You took in a steadying breath. “I love my mother, she just can just ask too many questions sometimes. But I guess that’s better than her being dead.” Your face morphed into sadness.

“I don’t want my mother to die. I can’t live without her.” You thought about what you said and decided it made you seem co-dependant on her. “Well, I can, but I don’t want to.” That was when you caught Ben’s amused look. You frowned.

“Do I talk too much?” You asked, though the answer was clear. Ben opened his mouth, again, but, again, you cut him off.

“Actually, don't answer that. I don’t know if I could handle the answer.” You cringed at the childish tone of your words. “I mean, I could handle it, because I’m an adult. But you know that. Of course you know that. We do adult things all the time. Not that we only do adult things, but-,”

Ben decided to put you out of your misery. He grabbed at your face, squishing your cheeks together with one hand to prevent you from speaking any more. You looked at him with those wide, baby deer eyes he loved so much.

“You don’t talk too much.” He said calmly and placed a kiss right on your lips. He hoped that would be the end of it and he could get back to his paper. You smiled gratefully when he let go of your face and cuddled back into him.

“Thank you, Ben.”

Unfortunately, that inspired a new spill of words.

“Wait, do you like Ben or Soldier Boy better? I know Ben was your name from before, but most people call you Soldier Boy. Of course, I’m not most people, but what do you like more?”

“Oh God,” you breathed out, “I should have asked months ago. What if I’ve been using the wrong name this whole time? You probably hate me now.”

Ben sighed and let you ramble on. You would tire yourself out eventually.

[iscdisc]

The Farmhouse Arc should've been the most significant character growth period for 2012 April as a character, and I kind of wanted to talk about that- Lmao

I apologize for not for recalling the user who's post I saw talking about this (I'll definitely @ them if I end up finding them / their post again-), but I recently came across somebody mentioning how they felt 2012 April should have experienced some self-loathing during The Farmhouse Arc given the whole Irma / Kraang Invasion situation-

I completely agree ! But that made me want to expand on that in my own way, because this is something that I genuinely enjoy getting into since there was so much potential (As most things in 2012 have-) that just didn't used,,

Since we've already established time and time again with this series that the writing is not as good as it could be, it "makes sense" that April barely felt any guilt outside of the initial S2 finale and the mistakes that she made don't even get brought up during the aftermath that is the Farmhouse Arc (If we're really being honest, they don't even really get brought up during the initial Season 2 finale- 💀). But if the show had better writing, April should have and would have felt more guilt / had that guilt be very apparent throughout the Farmhouse Arc in how she moves and talks to the Turtles + Casey during their stay there. Not to say that everything was entirely her fault, such as Irma being Kraang Subprime in disguise (She didn't ask for that nor did she cause that to happen-), but it should be acknowledged that their lack of an upper hand feels attributed to her actions the most in this particular Season finale.

I mean, honestly what was she even doing-?? I'm not trying to necessarily give a pass to Casey here, since I know that he was also goofing off / not taking things as seriously as he should have been even though he technically was helping Raph search for Karai- But at least he was with Raph, you know what I mean? Raph and Casey (technically) were searching the city for Karai as it means of protecting her and keeping her safe from the imminent Kraang Invasion (They were also looking for her post her mutation in general, but it was especially dire now-), Leo and Donnie (and Mikey technically-) are in the Lair deliberating on courses of action (Both on options to confront the incoming Kraang Invasion but also means of a safety net, something that Leo in particular was stressing they have outside of the city-). What is April doing during this time? What was her big contribution to this incoming threat? Hanging out with Irma. Like what- Lmao

I understand that like a lot of things that this show has 2012 April do or say, it's just used as a plot device or something to push the narrative that they're going for (Which is incredibly irritating, since it basically sacrifices any good character writing for her so that they can just move the plot along- Regardless of whether or not it makes sense for her as a character to do or not do- But I digress.), and this is just another example of that. But I would be lying if I said this particular aspect of the S2 finale has never made a lick of sense to me, even to this day. A second attempt at a Kraang Invasion is literally on the horizon, and instead of being with her team + actively helping / contributing in some way to this inevitable issue, April's hanging out with Irma-? The writers don't even give any context prior either, like the two of them coming from the movie theater or April's home or something. They provide no explanation as to why April's even spending her time with Irma in this moment.

Which, just like most things in this show, I'm not even saying that that had to have been a poor choice? This is why context is important- If they had shown April clearly stewing over the incoming Kraang Invasion as she's on her way to meet up with everybody else to discuss their options and Irma "just so happened" to essentially ambush April with her presence, thus making April feel obligated to entertain her for the time being? That would have made a lot more sense. It also would have been a great way to foreshadow the events to come in relation to Irma, since there would have been a clear atmosphere change and some unspoken reason as to why Irma wants her attention so badly right now- It also wouldn't have taken up a lot of runtime in my opinion, so I don't understand why they didn't do something like that? 💀

But to not derail from the initial point, (Given the poor writing, I know-) April basically brings a bunch of chaos to the Turtles (and Casey) and quite literally does the bare minimum about it. When she (unintentionally) reveals their home to the enemy, what does she do throughout that entire ambush? Hide. She doesn't even make any attempts to fight off the Kraang that are flooding into the Liar and essentially destroying their home.

What did she do after they escaped the sewers? Take them to her apartment, which initially was just meant to help Donnie get patched up before revisiting the chaos she (unintentionally) created, but instead April ends up staying in her apartment with her cowardly Father-?? For way longer than she should have. I understand that April does not control Donnie and it's not / shouldn't be her role to influence his decisions, but it was also upsetting to know that she was basically the reason Donnie was so inactive (Since he refused to "leave her side" or whatever-) and this in turn caused Mikey to also be inactive because (Rightfully so??) he's not going to go out there by himself- So April (more or less) was the reason why the three of them did nothing but wait around in her apartment until Raph and Casey arrived. She technically "did something" during the fight (more or less) with Kraang Prime in the Turtle Mech, but that only partially counts to me because that was more of a group effort (Since it's ideal for four people to be working the robot and she pulled like one lever or something like that- Lmao).

And of course, there was that psychic freakout that she had at the end of the S2 finale, but those never count to me because that's not something that she's consciously making an effort to do- If that makes sense? If April wasn't this special Human + Kraang Mutant Hybrid, she would just be freaking out like a regular person, and that would have done nothing for them- You know what I mean? (I really loathe these psychic freakouts that the writers have April do for this very reason-)

If you really pick apart April's role in the S2 finale, she mostly escalates the situation and does very very little to alleviate any of it or contribute positively in some way. Again, I acknowledge this is a poor writing decision and most likely influenced by their want to move the plot along and make this season finale "really dramatic"- But that doesn't mean that I'm not allowed to acknowledge it for what it is. Lmao

That being said though, I can now circle back to the topic at hand, which is that the Farmhouse Arc should've been a huge growth period or her as a character. ESPECIALLY in regards to her relationships with the Brothers and Casey.

The S2 finale should have been a situation that caused the group to view April differently. Not in the sense that they view her as an enemy or something of that nature, more that they're finally more openly acknowledging that she makes a lot of mistakes. Mistakes that they (More so the Brothers than Casey-) usually suffer the brunt of the consequences of. This is something that I feel is very apparent with her character (S2 the most-), and while that isn't a bad thing since a lot of characters in 2012 make mistakes, it's very obvious that the main group responds incredibly differently to her mistakes than any other character's mistakes. She's never forced to dwell on her wrongdoings or missteps, nor does the group ever harp on them or make her feel guilty for a prolonged duration of time like they do with other characters. We see this constantly throughout the series. The Brothers and Casey are always quick with their reassurance and understanding, always quick to tell her it isn't a big deal or that they got it handled, etc.

While it's not necessarily a bad thing to support her or make efforts to prevent her from developing a lack of self confidence, there's a fine line between giving support and coddling a person. Oftentimes, I feel like this teeters into the coddling side of things rather than genuinely supporting her. They essentially treat her like a child (so to speak), in the sense that they'd rather her believe that she "didn't do anything wrong" and that *everything's okay" instead of being honest when she makes mistakes or acts in ways that genuinely upsets them or off puts them.

THIS?? The S2 finale / Kraang Invasion?? This 1000% should have been the boiling point, and Raph in particular should've been the one to tip over the metaphorical pot. A theory that I have for the S2 finale going into the Farmhouse Arc that I believe holds up very well is Raph and Casey not being privy to the fact that April caused a lot of the chaos that they experienced during that finale. Of course, once they initially left New York City, their priorities were more focused on getting to safety (the O'Neil Farmhouse) and helping Leo in some way / shape / or / form giving his uncertain condition health wise. So it makes sense that this wasn't a topic of conversation immediately. However, it would not surprise me in the slightest if Donnie had made the decision to not tell Raph and Casey about what had transpired in the Lair that day (Or at the very least not the whole story, which would include April's involvement-). Convincing Mikey (And somewhat April-) to do the same. Because why wouldn't he? April's always been his top priority, and if not telling Raph and Casey the truth means protecting her, then he most likely will do that. Because I'm sure he knows Raph would be pissed beyond belief.

AND AS HE SHOULD BE- Hello?? If Raph found out that the reason why the Kraang Invasion began sooner than they planned thus causing them to be incredibly unprepared / their Lair got discovered and destroyed by said Kraang Invasion / Leo got separated from the group (And took on Shredder alone, but I fully acknowledge that that wasn't April's fault, I feel like that was a really stupid call on Leo's part during this finale-) / Splinter got separated from the group and this causing a domino effect that led him to confronting Shredder and being thrown further into the sewers and Raph ( + Donnie / Mikey / and April-) witnessing that horrific event was because of APRIL -?? Regardless of whether or not it was an accident, I think he would have a right to be upset with her. Because like I said before, she's had a lot of accidents that they've had to clean up before.

So just picturing Raph chewing her out at The Farmhouse and finally addressing how upset he's been with her in the past but bit his tongue so many times because she's supposed to be their friend?? That's "Chef's Kiss" tier conflict in my opinion. I genuinely feel like something of this nature was meant to happen and should have happened. A mistake of this caliber should have affected her relationships with them. Of course, Raph is the only one that I truly see being so unapologetically upset with April over this. Casey and Mikey would probably fall under some kind of murky mix of emotions, where they understand why they should be upset with her and to a degree they are, but they don't necessarily want to isolate her or cut her out of their lives- You know? I feel like their body language around her would be the biggest tell though, especially Mikey's, which I think would hurt April a lot (But it's not like she's really in a position to argue against it,,). I also think it would hurt Mikey a lot too, since being in this kind of position would make him incredibly uncomfortable for sure and I'd imagine he wouldn't like the way he's instinctively reacting to her presence nowadays,,

Donnie, of course, would be the only one "acting the same" towards April / around April. But deep down I think even he knows that something has changed between them, something that he would be in denial about for a majority of their stay there. I think this would have been a really great way to progress their relationship though- Both in the context of pushing for their romantic relationship (Which again, I personally am not a huge fan of 2012 Apritello, but I also don't want to exclude these things-) but also dismantling it entirely. On one hand, I think this would have been a really unique way to finally get Donnie to view April as an individual rather than simply the "object of his affections". Fully allowing those rose-colored glasses to be put aside for a second, you know? This should have been an event that tested his (so called) love for April in my eyes. Because if he doesn't love her and value her as a person, especially when she's at her lowest or has made some of her biggest mistakes (Ones that directly affect him-), then can he really say he loved her at all? I also think this should have been a great arc for Donnie as far as not making excuses for April anymore, since this is a bad habit he's (seemingly) nurtured. Learning that it's okay to be critical of her and these criticisms not drastically influencing their relationship or his affections towards her. But I can also see this skewing the complete opposite direction, and this finally being the event that ends the crush saga all together-

I personally felt like this was a very realistic possibility, since Donnie's crush on April is very surface level (He only "fell" for April because she was the first girl he witnessed upon leaving his home for the first time + he thought she was very pretty. He never makes any genuine attempts to get to know her as a person, and this feels very apparent given his behaviors and actions towards her. When he made his chart to "successfully get April to hang out with him" back in S1, everything that he listed had everything to do with himself and nothing to do with her or her interests. He didn't even try to guess or do any kind of process of elimination for her interests through his conversations / interactions with her. Also during S1, Donnie makes the bold assumption that April will like him simply because her Father is also a scientist- Which has absolutely nothing to do with April as an individual and there's no real correlation as to why she would "like him more" simply because he's similar to her Father / Father's profession? During this exact Season, when we see him gift her the music box that he made for her in, "A Foot Too Big" / S3 EP 2 /, April clearly looks uncomfortable for very obvious reasons but another thing that comes to mind is whether or not she even likes music boxes-?? There's no real explanation as to why he thought this would be a good gift for her- 💀). So to me, it makes sense that having his Rose colored glasses shattered / having a situation that practically forces Donnie to truly see her as an individual who's flawed and makes mistakes like this one would cause his crush on her to essentially evaporate instantly. Because what was his crush / infatuation founded on in the first place-? You know what I mean? I can also see his crush dissipating because of April and how she's handling this entire situation. I can see her handling it poorly in two different senses, the first being that she becomes very overly sensitive and defensive (Since Raph blowing up on her would be a massive hit to her pride, and as we've seen throughout the series, she's built up a pretty big ego just as much as the other characters have-) or she becomes very detached and blunt. Something that would cause her to become more openly honest with Donnie about how she views him and their relationship, that being that they just don't really have one- Finally being able to speak on how his advances make her feel and how they aren't necessarily wanted a majority of the time. :/

But now that I've established how I feel the other main characters should've responded towards April post the S2 finale / entering the S3 Farmhouse Arc (Minus Leo whose in a coma-), it's finally time to talk about how I feel April should have carried herself during this arc. Which would be BUILDING / REBUILDING HER RELATIONSHIPS WITH THE OTHER MEMBERS OF THIS TEAM (Minus Leo, but also technically him to just after he wakes up from his coma-). One of my biggest gripes with 2012 April in relation to the group as a whole is her lack of proper dynamic with most of her teammates. Casey is honestly the only exception to this, since we do see her get more significant bonding moments with Casey / she does get a lot of one on one screentime with him on particular- But even that could use some work too. April doesn't feel like an actual friend to any of them, and that's always been something that bothers me considering how highly they regard her as a person and how much they trust her / how much they put their faith in her. It would make sense to properly establish where that trust and praise even stems from, you know what I mean? But since the writers suck ass, you can essentially just chalk this up to her being the titular girl character and therefore she "deserves this treatment" canonically. I hate that reasoning and think it's really dumb. :) Lmao

I'm not saying the entire Farmhouse Arc needed to be so April centric (Since 2012 already feels like the Leonardo and April O'Neil show a majority of the time- 💀), but I don't think it could have hurt to have a majority of those episodes have significant moments between April and a particular Brother / Casey. With Mikey and April, I think it would have been really great for April to validate his feelings and reinforce the fact that it's okay for him to be upset with people. That doesn't mean that he has to hate them forever or hold grudges like a lot of people in his life do (I can also imagine that's the biggest reason why he's so uncomfortable with the possibility that he's holding a grudge against April, since his entire life revolves around this stupid grudge between his Father and his Uncle- Because Shredder basically is their uncle and I hate that that isn't acknowledged more?? That's like top tier family drama angst right there- Lmao). But it's also not healthy for him to essentially pretend as though he doesn't feel emotions like anger and frustration and disappointment. I think it would have been really cool for April to validate his thoughts and opinions, with this being used to build a better relationship between them and result in Mikey learning to trust April once again (Not that he necessarily lost his trust in her but it felt complicated for a while-). We can also get more screentime of April loosening up and doing fun / silly things, since I'm sure Mikey would bring out that side of her ! I also think Mikey should have been the one to help her with her psychic abilities instead of Donnie, I don't know if that's a hot take but- LMAO

Like I said earlier, I don't think April didn't have a relationship with Casey but I think this situation would help strengthen it for sure. To be honest though, I don't see April necessarily needing to make a lot of amends with Casey (Aside from his Father and younger Sister getting abducted as well, and maybe this could be a good way for Casey to be able to actually talk about his family with someone onscreen-). But I do like the idea of April going to Casey a lot during the situation for advice- To have an outside looking in perspective, you know what I mean? Especially with Raph and how to fix that mess,, But this would be a great way to show how much April values Casey as a friend and respects his opinion / appreciates the fact that he's always been a shoulder for her to cry on or vent to. I also want Casey to reinforce this idea that she doesn't need to be this "perfect person". This whole character development period for her should be about that in general, but I feel like Casey / her interactions with Casey should highlight this theme the most. I think April should be able to express how difficult it's been to come to terms with the fact that she's not where she wants to be or who she thought she was, with Casey throwing out the idea that maybe that was never who she was meant to be. That it's never too late to reinvent yourself or be a different person, one that you better reflects who you are. I basically just want Casey to reinforce her individualism the most !

I'm biased, so I prefer the situation dissipating Donnie's crush on April, and for that to build a new foundation for a relationship. A platonic relationship. Donnie never truly interacted with April as a friend, always interacting with her as his crush or infatuation, you know what I mean? He read into every interaction they had, everything he did felt as though it had some romantic strings attached or implications. He needs to let that go, for sure. I think they could have had a really cool dynamic if this had happened. The writers also could have better explored April's intelligent side, the one that they constantly like to associate with her character but I feel doesn't always hold up (Not only because a lot of her "character traits" feel reliant on the plot of an episode, making them incredibly inconsistent, but I've always compared April's intelligence level to Leo's rather than Donnie's. You know what I mean?). If April actually has an interest in S.T.E.M. the way the writers like to imply that she does, then this would have been a really good thing for her too ! I honestly don't have much to say aside from this though, because I don't necessarily see a lot of friendship scenarios for April and Donnie-? I know that's kind of sad, but I've personally never envisioned them being super close-? 😭

Raph is my favorite aspect of this entire hypothetical concept though. Not only does it include the satisfaction (For me, yes-) of a character rightfully telling April off for once and April actually having to face the repercussions of something that she's done for an indefinite amount of time, but this also simultaneously feeds into my take that April and Raph should have been a lot closer than they actually were- To talk about this a little better, I'm including some old WIPs of a comic I made exploring this idea (I guess technically I'm still making it-? I haven't worked on it in a while,, 😔) !

I'll do my best to not infodump about the entire story that I envisioned for this comic (Cause it's a lot and this post is already lengthy enough- Lmao), but to provide some context for these specific panels: After Raph explodes on April after finding out what actually transpired during the S2 finale / takes the time to throw in the fact that she's pretty incompetent a majority of the time and it's upsetting the constantly have to clean up after her, April (somewhat understandably) gets in her feelings and it's pretty upset about the situation overall. She ends up running into a conflict with some people by herself in the woods while taking a walk to get some fresh air (It was over a missing mutagen canister and I kind of envisioned these people being similar to "The Finger" from the Bigfoot episode- Like, just weirdos- Lmao), and as you can tell from the comic she pretty much gets her ass handed to her. This is when Raph's words really started to set in for her and she felt honestly disappointed with herself. But instead of kicking her while she's down or fanning the flames, Raph opens up to her instead-

With that little bit of context out of the way, I really love this idea that seeing April like this would result in Raph wanting to open up to her. Why? Because he sees himself in her. Especially right now. Seeing her so frustrated with herself, April wanting to do more than she's physically capable of doing as she is now, feeling weak and helpless ,, He's been there. Many many times. So he starts to empathize with her and his anger simmers a bit.

He opens up about his role in this team, and how a majority of the time he only feels good for punching and hitting people. Like that's all he's capable of. He talks about how he feels so insignificant when the solution isn't hitting people, or even if there is someone to hit that doesn't change anything or resolve the issue. He's not smart like Donnie, he's not warm and compassionate like Mikey, he's not a symbol for people to follow like Leo. In these ways, he understands wanting to do more and being so angry when facing the reality that you can't. Or rather, as you are right now, you can't.

This is more of a personal headcanon for me, but I'd imagine that it took rough a lot of effort and dedication to get the build that he currently has / maintains. I wouldn't be surprised if it took him quite some time to build up that body mass, you know what I mean? So I was also going to reference that at some point in relation to Raph talking about not being where you want to be yet- How for years, he felt so weak compared to Splinter and that upset him,, But it also motivated him to be the person that he currently is + why he takes training more seriously than everybody else. Because he was tired of feeling weak.

This basically segways into Raph helping April with her training during the Farmhouse Arc and this being the most significant way in which they build their new relationship with each other ! He's a little impressed with April's dedication to improving too, which also helps him view April differently / give them something in common. When they return to New York City, I'm sure April would want to feel confident in herself and capable of fixing this mess- Raph getting her there feels like a no brainer to me. I'd also include moments where they're not training and just hanging out regularly during their stay at the Farmhouse ! Something that admittedly would've taken some convincing on April's part, since even though I said Raph's anger simmered, that doesn't mean that it completely vanished right away. But eventually he'd agree to it and slowly let April in again. Maybe not even again though, since they didn't really have a relationship prior to this in my eyes (Nor do they interact a lot canonically as it is-). So this would honestly feel like Raph letting April in for the very first time-! 😭

Also, of course I'm going to be throwing in some hints of 2012 Raphril here and there within this comic- This is me we're talking about- LMAO 💛❤️

I also totally address Donnie's behaviors towards April / his (Most likely unintentional?) misogynistic tendencies. How his coddling of her harms her rather than helps her. His lack of respect for her choices and her autonomy (Specifically referencing, "Within the Woods" where he blatantly acknowledges that April is interested in Casey but instead of respecting that, he feels the need to "prove to her" that she's wrong-?? For not choosing him, basically- 💀). His unhealthy possessives over her as a person. Etc. ! 😔👍

Sorry this was another lengthy yap post-! Basically I agree that April should've had more focus in relation to the S2 finale aftermath like that person was talking about, but I also think the Farmhouse Arc should've better established April's relationships within the group- Idk- ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯ Lmao

[too-much-tma-stuff]

Not Our Responsibility

Previous | Masterpost

Danny and Sam spent hours that night researching different typed of ghosts and demons. There was distressingly little information about Arabic ghosts easily accessible online and Danny regretted, not for the first time, that cultural education was not on the LoA’s curriculum. When they were called down for dinner Danny and Sam continued to talk and debate about the ghosts, mostly just because it was fun watching her parents try not to look disgruntled and upset by the morbid topic. Something they always gave Sam a hard time about being interested in but couldn’t tonight because Danny was clearly interested in it too.

They tried to redirect the conversation towards academics or their ‘relationship’ a few times, Danny would give polite, short answers before returning to his conversation with Sam. No one was surprised when after dinner the Manson parents suggested that Danny stay the night since they were clearly having such a good time.

Danny put up token resistance and gave in quickly when they insisted as he knew they would. He and Sam went back up to her room to play some online games with Tucker and tell him about everything that they had learned. Privately he was debating between the names Hatif, a voice without a source, and Afreet, which was a type of demon. He liked the sound of both but one was obviously scarier then the other.

He could use both, he didn’t have a name like Oracle yet an a voice without a source was a pretty good meaning for the guy in the chair. But would it be suspicious? Maybe.

“Shit,” he cursed as he died again.

“What the hell Danny!” Tucker half shouted as he tried to revive Danny for the fourth time that match.

“I’m sorry guys, my minds just not in it tonight I guess. I’ll try to focus.”

That night after they finished their game and he was curled up in a nest of pillows and blankets he’d made for himself on Sam’s floor he decided he’d rather just go by Hafit. He wasn’t going to be a demon after all, and there was a fine line between having fun with how people would persevere him and sabotaging any chances he had of remaining in contact with his family when all this was said and done.

The next day he told Sam’s parents that he was heading home, denied their offer of a ride and took a cab as close to the warehouses as they were willing to go. He let himself in to his makeshift lab without the need for a key, simply reaching through the door to unlock it from inside, and headed to his workbench. He dumping out a bag of scrap materials he had stolen from the gave he pulled up a stool he was sure was new and started to tinker.

It was less then an hour later when the door creaked open again and he glanced up to see Red hood entering. He gave his unwilling brother a smile, Red Hood nodded as he closed the door behind him and stood there with his arms crossed, posture as closed and defensive as Danny’s was open and inviting.

“Hey, welcome! Thanks for the chair,” He said, gesturing to it knowing Jason could only be the one who’d brought it. “I don’t have any cameras or anything in here yet if you want to get comfortable,” he suggested, gesturing to his own face to indicate Hood’s helmet.

“No thanks,” Jason said in a clipped tone, but he did come further into the building, pulling out a second chair and sitting down across from Danny.

“I’ve decided on a code name by the way,” He said conversationally when it became clear Jason wasn’t just going to get to the point of why he was here. “Hafit, I’ll put a modulator in my helmet to make my voice sound more ghostly, I have an aesthetic I want to go for,” he joked and Jason scoffed.

“Alright,” He agreed, and hey, at least he wasn’t making fun of Danny for it. He lapsed back into silence and this time Danny let him, there was a tension in Jason’s body that said he had something to say but was struggling with it. Rather then distract him further Danny gave him the time he needed to sort of his thoughts, going back to tinkering with his scrap to take the pressure off Jason. “Do you really think you can fix the effects of the Pit?” He asked after a long time. “Without undoing the, you know, being alive part.”

Danny hummed and put down his tools, clasping his hands on the table as he leaned forward a little bit. “Yes. Probably more easily for you then for me since you only had one exposure and haven’t been exposed repeatedly like me. Like I said last time, I won’t make any guarantees but I do think I can.”

“You know a lot about this?” Jason asked, cocking his head a little.

“More then most people, I am one of the Demon Head’s heir after all,” Danny said with a sneer as he picked up his tools again, wanting to keep his hands busy while he talked about this. He glanced up when he heard an intake of breath. “You didn’t know that? Talia was fond of you, I assumed she’d tell you about her sons… No? Well, I am, and Damian too. Talia Al Ghul is our mother, Bruce is our father.

“But back to the Lazarus water. I’ve been dependent on it since I was 8 so mother has been sending me bottles of it to keep me going while I was here. Unbenounced to her and with father’s supervision Tim and I have been conducting experiments on it for a couple years now, so I know a decent amount, I’ve simply reached the limits of what I can do under their supervision like I said last time. Not because they’re going to hurt anyone, but because I’ve realized that it’s far too magical to be made sense of by purely scientific means.

“There’s all sorts of emotion wrapped up in it, and that might be what gives it it’s power but maybe if I can strip all the anger and blood lust out of it, imbue it with some other emotion instead,” He trialed off as he got lost in his own thoughts. Shocked out of it by Jason’s laugh, making his hands still in their work.

“I’d say that sounds ridiculous but…” Jason trailed off, he knew, he had had unexplained things happen to him as well.

“That’s certainly what father and Tim think, they want everything to have scientific explanations. You know father is a control freak, anything that’s not controllable or understandable in a traditional sense is unacceptable thing, experimenting with magic is too unpredictable for him. It’s the obvious next step to me though, and my instinct for this stuff is good, has been since I was dunked in the pit the first time. I have a… connection to it I think. Not like grandfathers,” he wrinkled his nose at the thought. “But I haven’t been wrong about this yet.”

“You’re very confident,” Jason said a little condescendingly and Danny shrugged.

“I’ll take all appropriate precautions and if I’m wrong I’ll try something else, but I know where I want to start. Once I have the appropriate tools and security of course. This is a very good start, thank you again, but I suspect it’ll take a few months to get everything I need.”

Jason hummed and they lapsed into silence again, only for a few minutes this time. “You talk different then you do on TV,” Jason pointed out cocking his head a little. Danny wasn’t surprised to find that Jason had been doing research into what the family had been up to since he was gone and maybe Danny in particular since they were working together now.

“I know. I sound more like Damian don’t I?” He asked with a little smile and Jason nodded. “That shouldn’t be surprising really. We are twins, raised in the same environment, I just pretend to be a normal kid for the cameras but you already know I’m not a normal kid. I need you to take me seriously as a potential ally and scientist so dumbing down my speech won’t do me any favours.”

“I guess that’s true,” Jason said with a shrug and Danny laughed.

“While you’re here I’d like to iron out some details. I said I would help you if you needed, so we need a secure line to contact each other, a com or something. Once I have more security up I’ll give you codes to enter but not to disable cameras so I can keep an eye on what you’re doing in here but I’ll make sure no one else can get in. I’m one of the bats ‘guys in the chair’ after all, I’m good at that and keep them off my own trail.”

“You don’t have to do that,” Jason snorted. “If you’re working with Lazarus water I’ll be avoiding this place like the plague.”

“Fair enough, but I still will as a show of good will,” Danny said firmly and Jason didn’t argue.

“Your right about contact though, once you’ve build something your sure is secure I’ll give you access to the channel I use. For now… are you going to be here for a while?”

“Probably a couple more hours.”

“Good, I’ll go get you a burner phone. You can use that for now,” Jason said and started to get up.

“That sounds good, before you go though do you have any requests about what I should build for you?” Danny asked cocking his head to the side a little and giving Jason a slightly cocky smile.

“No requests yet,” Jason snorted shaking his head at Danny. “Show me what you can do and then maybe I’ll trust you with something that I need.”

“That’s fair, I’ll see what I can come up with. I have some ideas,” he assured with a smile that was just a hair to wide and was satisfied when he saw Jason’s posture stiffen slightly.

“Good,” Hood huffed before he stalked out of the warehouse like an offended cat. Danny bit back a chuckle. He knew he was unsettling when he wanted to be and he did like to play that up sometimes, just for fun.

Once he was alone he turned his attention back to his work, mentally doing a catalogue of what he had and what he could make with it. He didn’t want what he made to require constant reloading right now so it couldn’t be a weapon, especially since he didn’t have what he needed to manufacture the amount of ammo that would be actually necessary and anything that used traditional bullets wouldn’t be unique enough to really show what he could do.

He didn’t have a lot to work with really, but what he did have was a direct line to the channel the bat-family used to communicate, which had been changed and updated a few times since Jason had died. Danny grinned and pushed most of the junk to the side, pulling the things he would need for this project closer to him and beginning to work. It wasn’t a particularly difficult build really, the hardest part being making sure that it would be easily detectable or traceable by Oracle. With the work he did he could help cover it up but he didn’t want to be to obvious and found out before he was ready to reveal what he was doing here. He wasn’t going to come clean by choice until he had results.

He got a text message from his father at one point and responded that he was still at Sam’s and would be back for dinner, double checking that his phone was set up to reroute from her house just in case the checked his location. Satisfied that he was in the clear he put the finishing touches on his project and started working on something else while he waited for Red Hood to return.

It was about three hours before Jason returned, not long after Danny started cleaning up and putting away his unused tools and scrap for next time. He was sure that eventually his lab would end up being a complete cluttered mess, with ongoing projects and experiments. But for now he could fully clean up his space, so he did. He would be ready to leave as soon as he had showed Hood what it was that he had made.

A loud bang on the outside of the door made Danny jump and alerted him to the fact that Red Hood had returned before he pushed the door open. He tossed a phone at Danny without saying anything and it was only his life-long training that allowed him to catch it with so little notice.

“Perfect timing,” Danny said as he started to mess with the phone, there was only one number in it which was Red Hood’s. He pocketed it and picked up the com he’d made. “Can I see your helmet for a minute? I made you a com that can patch in to all of the channels the Bats are currently using and shouldn’t be able to be traced,” He said, showing it to Hood. He’d made it as stripped down as he could so there would be almost no place to hide a tracker. “You can put your other channels you use in here the normal way,” He said with a dismissive gesture.

“Damn you would throw the family under the bus like that?” Jason chuckled as he took off his helmet and handed it over, of course he was wearing a domino under it.

Danny gave Jason a unimpressed look as he started to pull out the old com and install the new one. “The family can look after themselves and I’ll be looking out for them too. If you seriously injure one of my siblings we might have a problem, but I don’t think you’d actually do that. Your problem is with Bruce, and frankly, that’s none of my business.”

“He’s your father,” Jason said a little dumbly.

Danny shrugged without looking up. “He’s yours too, no matter how much you deny it he raised you more then anyone else did, and you’re trying to kill him. I’m just not saving him. It shouldn’t be our job to save him anyway, but you know it is. The way Tim had to blackmail Father into taking him on as Robin after you so he wouldn’t fall apart after your death...” Danny trailed off with a disapproving hum, he hadn’t been their during that time of course but Tim had told him about it. He’d witnessed a fair few fights as well and knew they weren’t new.

“Damian tells me I don’t know the meaning of loyalty, perhaps he’s right, or perhaps no adult has earned it yet.” He was loyal to his siblings though, he wouldn’t have done this if he thought Jason would hurt them.

There was a long moment of tense silence before Jason spoke. “What do you mean falling apart?” He asked, sounding… nervous? Danny didn’t look up to check, worried it might send Jason back into his shell.

“He was furious, unreasonably aggressive even to petty criminals. The big blue boy scout had to hold him back from killing the Joker. Now, I’m not against killing him, but if Bruce needs a child to keep him true to morals he claims to hold so strongly then I don’t think he has a leg to stand on and yet he still has screaming fights with anyone who argues with him, including his children.” Danny hated those fights.

“He and Dick still at it huh?” Jason asked sounding amused.

“Not just Dick anymore, but ya,” Danny agreed with a sigh.

“Does he fight with you?” Jason asked, sounding a little uncertain.

“Me? No, if none of you managed to change his mind I Definitely won’t be able to. It’s easier to make him think I agree with him and then go do the things I want behind his back. He does love us, and I do love him too. I just…” He trailed off and sighed. “He leans on us more then he should, when he needs proper help. It’s tiring, and dangerous at times. I want better for all of us, including him, including you. But I’m just a teenager, a genius one, but basically still a kid. I can’t fucking fix decades of generational trauma, I can do my best to make sure me and Damian make it out.”

He finished working on the helmet and tossed it to Jason, sighing and stretching. Talking about emotions was more tiring than combat sometimes. “Helmet’s good to go. I told the family that I was staying overnight with one of my friends but I’d be home for dinner so I have to go. Let me know if you have any issues with the com, I’ll be back when I can and I’m sure you’ll find me if you want to talk.” He got up from the desk pulling on his own helmet. He’d get out of the alley with his grapple and find a place to hide and change back into civvies before calling a cab.

He waited for Hood to put his helmet back on as well and test the com a little before herding a baffled Red Hood out of his lab so he could lock up and head out. “I’ll be bringing some things over the next week too, just some equipment I need. Smuggling it in will be tricky, but I think I can make it work.” And if he really needed he was sure Sam and Tucker would help him without demanding to many answers if he really needed it, but he wasn’t going to say that. If they were involved at all the fewer people that knew that the safer they would be.

---------

When he got home Alfred and Damian were waiting for him. Well Damian pretended he had just been hanging around the lobby but it was obvious he had really been doing. Especially when he and Alfred immediately shooed him through into the family dining room. They had a little catching up to do after he'd been away overnight. Danyal forced himself not to jump to the conclusion they knew he had been lying, that would only make lying harder.

“So Danny, did you have fun with your friend?” Bruce asked.

“Oh ya I had a great time! We watched movies, played Doomed, and did a bunch of research!” Danny agreed as he served himself some of the salad on the table before pushing it over to Damian.

“And her parents behaved themselves?” Tim asked dryly, ignoring a warning look from Bruce.

“To my face,” Danny said with a grimace and an equally dry tone. “Sam told them we were dating to shut them up but I don’t want you to worry about it. I’m still very much not interested in a relationship, just giving her some peace from her parents. I'm only mentioning it in case they bring it up at the next Gala they're invited to.”

“Are you sure? If you do want to date you know that’s alright don’t you Chum?” Bruce asked a little awkwardly.

“It doesn’t have to be girls either,” Tim added, of course he’d been dating Bernard for a while now.

“No, I know. Really though guys, Sam is one of my best friends but that’s all we are. If that ever changes or I get interested in dating I will tell you guys,” He promised. And that actually wasn’t a lie, he might not trust his family with everything but he knew he could trust them with that. Bruce might be the normal amount of protective of one of his children in a romantic relationship but he wasn’t bad about his kids romantic lives really.

“You said you were working on some research? What were you researching?” Bruce asked, pushing his food around his plate. Maybe he’d already eaten? Or maybe he was just to tired, he certainly had impressive bags under his eyes. It was nice he was still staying up to have a meal with them and show an interest even though he must have had a long day.

“Uh..” Danny glanced at Alfred where he was lingering in the doorway. “Permission to talk about work just a little at the table?” He asked holding his fingers up just a bit apart from each other. Alfred considered it and then nodded. “I’ve been thinking about changing my code name! I mean Mystic was just a spin off of Oracle and it’s worked well but I want a name of my own you know? So Sam and I were looking up types of ghosts.

“I told her it was for a story I was trying to write but I think since I’m a disembodied voice most of the time so I think something ghostly would be cool! And maybe I’m reclaiming my death a little bit you know?” He asked and didn’t comment on the way Bruce and Damian both flinched.

“Ah,” Bruce sounded, a little strained.

“Any ideas?” Cass jumped in to ask, giving Danny a reassuringly warm smile he couldn’t help return.

“A few, but I don’t want to share them yet okay? Once I’ve thought about it more and have a few finalists I’ll ask you guys for your opinions.”

“That sounds like a good plan,” Bruce agreed with a slow exhale.

“Agreed for that is enough talk about work at the table,” Alfred said firmly. As always, no one argued with him and they all settled in for one of their regular family dinners.

[flowery-mess]

kill the silence

Pairing: frat boy Noah x female reader

Warnings: 18+ MDNI! / argument with reader's mother / mother's asshole boyfriend mentioned / mentiones of alcohol / I think that's it, let me know

Words: 2,8k

Author's note: don't you just love when writers self project themselves in their works? Because that's exactly what I did lol. Hope you like getting to know more of Ella's story💕

frat boy Noah masterlist

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“Can we talk about it?”

“Ella please, act like an adult.”

You rolled your eyes after reading your mom’s messages. Yesterday she called you on facetime to show you the big diamond on her finger, throwing the news of being engaged at you.

Your parents divorced when you were 4 and it has been a wild ride since then.

You stayed living with your mum, seeing your dad only a few times a month. You’d think that something like this would make your and your mom's relationship stronger, but it was the opposite.

She started dating different guys, but no one was serious enough for her to bring him home for good. She introduced you to some of them, but you never liked any of the men that walked through the door of your home. And you didn’t hide your dislike.

You never crossed a line with doing something rebellious, but you always made sure that they knew you’re not a fan of them with the way you talked to them or about them behind their backs.

Your mom always put up with it, but it brought lots of fights between you two. She never blamed you for her failed relationships, because they weren’t meant to last. Until she met him, Richard.

Richard was a few years older than her, with no kids and with a nice house. Moving to his place wasn’t a question, she just told you to pack your stuff. “You’re my child, you’re gonna follow me wherever I go. I don’t care that you don’t want to.” will probably replay in your head until the day you die.

Sadly for you you were still underage and with no other place to go, so you moved to his place and that’s where the hell started.

Heated arguments with your mom every day, silent treatments from both of you and cold shoulder for Richard. Poor guy didn’t stand a chance, you dismissed him at the very beginning.

You hated the house and you cried yourself to sleep every other night.

He turned out to be a narcissistic and arrogant guy which you couldn’t stand. You were counting the days until it was time for you to move away for college. The best thing that ever happened to you.

Seeing your mom and Richard less was a good thing for keeping the family relationships at least somehow working. After a few months of not seeing them you finally found the courage to come back for a weekend and somehow you three acted like the hell before you left never happened.

You got along with Richard for a few hours and then left their place again. It wasn’t home for you, it was just their place. And since then you visit them occasionally.

You got used to their relationship and swallowed all your opinions for your mother’s sake and happiness.

That was until yesterday though.

You didn’t know what reaction from you she expected, but it probably wasn’t “Are you fucking serious?” and hanging up on her. Since then you didn’t pick up any of her calls nor replied to any of her messages.

“Ella please, just a few minutes so we can talk about it.”

You read the next message and rolled your eyes again. You finished the drink in your hand before standing up and going outside.

Little did you know Noah was watching you look at your phone every other minute, rolling your eyes and making sad faces. He could tell something was wrong so he wasn’t surprised to see you storm out of the crowded living room.

He wanted to give you a few minutes and see if you come back, if not, he knows where to find you.

In the beginning of your friendship with benefits you two sometimes sneaked away from your friends and met in the backyard in a small place that was separated from the rest of the big garden by bushes. There was an old swing, too small for both of you, but it provided you lots of fun. Also the almost broken fence where Noah pinned you many times just to steal kisses from you was there. It became “your place” any time you two couldn’t find each other and texted the other “our place?” and time, you both were there.

Your place was exactly where you ran off. The drink you just finished gave you enough courage to face your mom’s voice over the phone and tell her your opinion.

She picked up almost immediately and started talking, but you cut her off.

“Finally darling, ca-”

“No mom, you let me talk now.” you started, taking a deep breath before letting it all out. “I’ve been silent for the past few years, but I can’t let you marry him without telling you my honest opinion.”

You kicked a few rocks that were laying around and walked back and forth, a habit of yours when you were too nervous.

“I don’t think he’s good for you. I don’t think he’s enough for you. You were always a strong independent woman who knew her worth, I never thought I'd see you running around a man like you do now. You always laughed at women who served food under their man’s nose or had to pack a bag for them. But now that’s you mom.” you stopped talking, expecting some protest from her, but there was just silence at the other side of the line.

“You do everything he says, you’re like his maid mom. That hurts me to see. You should find a man who’s gonna carry you in his arms and worship the ground you walk on, not someone who tells you he won’t eat the food you made because it tastes weird, but also refuses to cook his own meal. He’s a child mom.” you threw your hands up and down in a frustrating gesture.

She finally spoke and you could hear the hurt in her voice. “That’s not true Ella.”

“You know it is, you just don’t want it to be.”

“Listen, I know you don’t agree with my relationship, but you need to respect it. I’m finally happy.”

“I don’t think you really are.” you whispered back and couldn’t stop the tears running down your cheeks. Of course you want your mum to be happy, but if this is how happiness looks like, you hope you’ll never find it.

“I didn’t ask for your opinion. I just wanted to tell you that we will be sending invites next week and I’d really appreciate it if you’d come to the wedding.” there was a short break before she added “Please.”

She rarely used “please”, “thank you” or “I’m sorry” with you, so you knew how hard it must’ve been for her to say those words out loud.

“I have to think about it.” you told her the truth. You didn’t want to make any promises in case you’d decide to not attend in the end.

“You’re hurting me Ella.” there she was, back at attacking you for your feelings.

“Bye mom.” and before she could say anything else you pressed the red button and silenced her voice that could only say more hurtful things.

Your eyes stayed on the ground, colors of the grass and dirt mixing together as your tears formed in your eyes, one blink of your eyelids sending them down your cheeks.

You were hurting too. You were hurt, sad and angry. The anger took over your body and before you could think of what you were doing, you threw your phone away and only heard a loud bang when it landed somewhere in the dark in front of you.

When Noah thought you were gone for too long he decided to go after you. He found you with your back facing him, your hands by your sides, but you weren’t talking or moving, you were just standing there.

“Did something possess you?” he joked. He expected a silly comment back or you saying “shut up”, but you stayed silent.

The tears kept running down your cheeks, because you suddenly felt so small. You felt betrayed by your mother and you felt like you were standing in your childhood room listening to her “I don’t care what you want” speech all over again. You just wanted to cry.

You heard Noah's question, but what possessed you was just a pure sadness that was making it impossible for you to move or speak.

Noah made a few steps to be closer to you and reached for your hand, but before he could do that you finally spoke up.

“Can I have your phone?” even with your back still facing now very confused Noah, he could hear the tremble in your voice.

“What?”

“Your phone.” you turned around to face him. When you did, his confused face turned into something softer. He saw your wet cheeks and the small shakes of your chin. “I threw mine somewhere in the bushes and I need to find it.” you said it like it was the most obvious thing and waited for Noah to give you his phone.

He didn’t ask any questions and just handed you his phone, turning the flashlight on for you.

You turned around and went in the direction of where you thought your phone could be. Noah just stood there in silence, his eyes following your every move.

Well, now you really looked like something possessed you. Your hands were snapping the twigs that came your way, some of them got stuck in your hair while you tried to find your phone.

With no luck finding it, you got out of the bush and dived straight into another one.

“For fucks sake.” Noah couldn’t keep watching this shit show in front of him and yanked you out of the bush, took his phone from your trembling hand and started looking for your phone himself.

You cleaned yourself from the mess and leaves that were stuck to your clothes and hair. The need to escape this loud place made your body shake. You were thinking about telling Noah to stop and come for the phone tomorrow or even buy a new phone with a new number so your mum couldn’t call you again.

“Here.” Noah’s voice took you out of the trance you were in, looking at you with a proud smirk and leaves in his hair, but he had your black phone in his hand. And it looked like you didn’t break it when you threw it away.

“Thank you.” you took it out of his hand and put it in your pocket.

Noah, scared of what you’re going to do next, stood in silence and waited for your next move. But you just kept looking around, avoiding his face. You for sure didn’t make it easy for him.

“Do you want a hug?” he asked you, unsure look on his face.

“What?”

“Isn’t that what people want when they're sad?” just as he finished his question your hands were wrapped around his torso.

You didn’t want him to see you cry again, so you just hid your face in his sweatshirt. You tried to hold your sobs and cries in, but you felt like you’re going to explode, so you let everything out.

Noah didn’t know what else to do than just rub your back and gently sway you from side to side.

After a few minutes your breath calmed down and you stepped out of Noah’s arms, cringing at the wet spot on his grey sweatshirt.

“Sorry for that.” you whispered and pointed to the place that was covered in your tears.

Noah just looked down and laughed. “It’s okay. Come on, let's take you home.”

He took your hand in his, but you realized how crazy you must look after this meltdown, so you stopped in your tracks, making Noah stop too.

“I can’t go there. I look crazy.” you panicked.

“Yeah you do, but everyone is drunk at this point, they won’t notice.”

“No, Molly and Clara will and I don’t want to explain it to them.”

Noah just sighed and looked around, rubbing his jaw with his palm and thinking of ways to leave the fraternity without anyone seeing you.

“We can jump the fence.” he proposed.

“Are you out of your mind?” you looked at the tall metallic fence around you.

“It’s either that or the main door.”

“It’s impossible for me to jump over it Noah.”

“I’m gonna help you.”

You looked at the fence, then at Noah and then back at the fence.

He’s tall and strong and falling on your ass in front of him was better than doing the walk of shame.

“Okay.”

He led you in the direction of the fence. “Okay, so, you’re gonna put your feet in my hands and I’m gonna push you up. Then you have to carefully move over the top and jump down, okay?”

“How are you gonna do it?” you asked him, because there's no way you're going to help him from the other side.

“Haven’t thought of that yet.”

“God, don’t laugh at me if I fall.” you made him promise before he leaned forward and intertwined his hands low enough for you to step into them.

“Grab my shoulders. I’m gonna count to three and then push you up okay?”

“Okay.” when he started counting you were sure that neither of you knew what you were doing.

You felt yourself being lifted from the ground, reaching for the top of the fence and swung your leg over it, then the other one.

“Jump!” Noah yelled at you, because he was scared you’re going to fall back at him.

You closed your eyes and jumped, landing perfectly on your feet.

“I did it!” you turned around to see Noah through the metallic barricade between you, laughing at the situation.

It was Noah’s turn to jump over the fence and after a few failed attempts you had to hold in a laugh and said “You know you can walk through the inside and meet me in the parking lot?”

Before Noah gave you an answer, he was happy to hear you wanted to leave with him. He was scared you’re going to push him away and won’t let him comfort you like you did to him many times.

“Can’t let you have all the fun.” he snorted, laughing at himself after another failed attempt.

After he finally managed to climb to the top of the fence, one of his legs betrayed him and he fell down on his ass in front of you.

You gasped, not knowing if he was okay, but then you started laughing. He looked up at you, shame all over his face, but he couldn’t help laughing too.

“You know, I did that just to make you laugh. It was intentional.” he shrugged his shoulders after he stood up and used his hands to get rid of the dirt from his clothes.

“Smooth Sebastian, real smooth.” you laughed, but appreciated his attempts to lift your mood.

—

Noah paid for the cab to his place even though you insisted that after everything he’d done for you it was your turn to pay.

He sent you in the direction of his bathroom after he found a few leaves in your hair in the elevator and ordered some food while you washed the dirt of that night of your body.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Noah asked after he swallowed his food, looking at you at the other side of his sofa.

“Not really. Long story short, my mum is engaged to her ass boyfriend, we had a fight over the phone and I’m probably gonna have to buy a new dress for their wedding.”

“I’m sorry.” he didn’t know what else to say. Your mood was better now, no more tears and throwing things around, so he thought he did a good job.

He wasn’t good at those things, taking care of people, so he was proud of himself for returning the care you gave him many times before.

“Don’t be, shit happens. I just need time to process it.” you put away the take out box. “And maybe some cuddles would be nice.” you made your puppy eyes at him.

“Ugh, women.” he acted annoyed, but you didn’t miss the smile on his face when he lifted the blanket on his lap so you could lay down on his chest.

He put on his favorite show and you two watched in silence.

You were happy he found you in the garden. You loved your friends, but they wouldn’t give you the comfort you needed.

You realized that you want comfort from Noah just as much as you want to comfort him when he’s feeling unwell.

His fingers played with your hair and his eyes were focused on the TV. You laid on his chest, playing with the fabric of his t-shirt and thought about the upcoming wedding.

As if Noah could read your mind he suddenly said “You know, I could be your plus one at the wedding if you decide to go.” his gaze stayed on the TV.

“Shut up, you mean it?” because if you’re going to go, in a place so uncomfortable and full of people you haven’t seen in years, you’d appreciate someone by your side.

Do you want part two?

✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

This story is a work of fiction, with the plot and characters entirely made up. The appearance and name of the main male character are inspired by Noah Sebastian Davis, but the storyline bears no connection to the real person. Please do not steal or repost this work on other platforms without permission.

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