#basically a massive dismissal of everything wrong with me

[first-ex-wife]

.

[thewalrusespublicist]

What do you think about the Lindsay Ellis essay on Yoko?

Hi anon,

Ah, this is a toughie as Lindsay Ellis' video was actually the video that got me interested in the Beatles! So on that front .. I must have really enjoyed it at the time and I am grateful/embittered to it for leading me down this chaotic rabbit hole!

That being said, ughhh the video. On the one hand, to actually deal with the topic at hand she needed much longer than the run time of the video to actually get into it with enough detail, so it was always going to be simplistic. I did like some of her points about the other competing factors in the break-up and how Yoko really shouldn't be blamed for the overall break-up. I also liked her comparisons with Courtney Love and how women get blamed in these scenarios unjustly. However, my problem is she was presenting herself as an informed authority on the subject when to be honest, she doesen't actually show that great depth of knowledge. The not knowing about the nitty gritty about Northern Songs is one thing but clumping May Pang with those desperate for fame or clout ... I found either ignorant or disingenuous. That wasn't the first time I've noticed that with Lindsay's work. Not going to lie, I stopped watching her for ages after I watched a video where she was talking about British media and somehow managed to call John Hurt a low-rate tv actor and said that Blackadder was pro-the class system which I'm sorry, was ignorant to the point of stupidity. So yeah, I think Lindsay is great at conveying information but maybe also perhaps conveying incomplete information as if she was an expert in the subject.

This next bit might be a tiny tiny bit controversial but I don't really care. Knowing what I know now, I found the entire video to be partaking in an outdated and reductive type of feminism which doesn't actually allow women to have any flaws or be real people. Yoko was massively over-hated for all the wrong reasons, but it seems that in reaction some fans including Lindsay refuse to look at her with any critical view and dismiss any dissent as rooted in sexism. As a born and raised from the cradle feminist, I find this approach not only exhausting but sexist in and of itself as it strips women of agency and complexity. In the case of Yoko, the two extremes has meant that we've only recently been able to have honest conversation about her. No Yoko didn't break-up the Beatles, but she was a contributing factor and was a massive factor in why they didn't reunify in the 70s. Not because she sat on the bloody amp but because of nearly everything else she did. To say that she had no impact is terrible source-work and practice as it requires dismissing most of our sources from the period and from multiple primary perspectives in order to fulfil an ideological agenda. This in May's case is also silencing the voice of a female employee in a vulnerable position power-wise to sanitise her much wealthier boss' public image. I don't like that. I also want to make it clear that I don't think a lot of Yoko's actions were borne out of malicious intent but due to her extremely complicated personality and trauma, a personality that gets completely flattened if she's just a bit of cardboard jutting out in the corner. There are no winners if you refuse to engage with women as real people and through a modernised Madonna complex lens.

So ... a well-presented video with some great ideas but at the same time quite a basic overview that showed a lack of understanding of some key elements and a refusal to actually engage with the material to push a particular agenda.

[kitheking]

toxic traits i think redacted audio characters have/used to have: listener edition!

angel - pessimistic + perfectionism, especially when it comes to the pack. They feel slightly inferior because they’re human, so when it comes to planning events like the Solstice, they want everything to be perfect but they can’t help but imagine the absolute worst. I think they also begin to spiral a little when it comes to David + the pack and them working specific events, this is bc of the Inversion.

baabe - a massive people pleaser. similarly to angel, they feel inferior to the pack because they’re human, so when asher first introduced them to the pack, baabe altered basically everything about themselves from their interests to their humor in attempt to fit in. they’re like this with other humans too. They’re a lot better now that they’ve got roots in the pack, though.

sweetheart - major workaholic + defensive. the department obviously demands a lot from its employees, so sweetheart is definitely running on a few hours of sleep and caffeine, but instead of taking breaks they can sit at a desk and do paperwork all day. they often fail to realize how damaging it is and they get snappy when people try to help them. they usually apologize afterwards cause they’re cool like that.

smartass - inflexible + slightly aggressive. they are sooo stubborn and they don’t like trying new things at ALL. They also tend to get pretty feisty when somebody challenges them on anything and they’re quick to dish out insults. and i mean they go for the JUGULAR. they’ll insult your appearance, your grammar, they’ll find your whole family tree on facebook and bring up your family issues if it means they’ll win an argument.

lovely - they’re a little too confident and they overestimate themself. lovely is tough, don’t get me wrong BUT they tend to automatically assume they can do anything. the type of person to watch ultimate ninja warrior or some shit and be like “i could do that” but they most definitely could not. i still can’t get over how vincent warned them on that mountain or whatever and they decided not to listen and immediately got their shit rocked.

bright eyes - they used to be very impulsive. they get the urge to do something? they ARE going to do it. zero forethought. after the Quinn incident, they try to think before acting more often.

honey - they used to be very dismissive. they did not prioritize closeness, affection, or intimacy in their relationships because they didn’t know how to channel those emotions. ever since being with Guy, he’s helped them a lot.

darlin/tank - oh boyyy. they’ve definitely picked up on some extreme negativity in their life, but i think one of their worst traits was their recklessness. we know darlin has a habit at throwing themself into danger head on like they’re invincible, which results in them severely injured and needing somebody to take care of them. Part of me also thinks that they struggle with empathy. in the “Confronted by Your Pack Alpha” video, darlin seemed to have a hard time understanding how David + the pack felt about them running off to go vampire hunting and they were fully convinced that they were doing the right thing by trying to “protect” everyone.

i purposely left out some listeners, like lasko’s, antons, and james’ because i have no clue what theirs would be. I also left out Cutie because we all know what their toxic trait is… oh boy.

[wwereaderinserts]

I HAVE to send another request in for you because you absolutely KILLED the Gunther one I sent you and can't thank you enough!

Could I request something with Ilja Dragunov? I've had this idea for one where he and the reader have been best friends since they joined NXT- like, attached at the hip, always supporting each other during their matches, the kind of best friends who give each other big huge kisses on the cheek sort of thing- but the reader is so in love with him that the night he gets called up to the main roster and they don't, they basically break down and then finally admit to him them that they've loved him for years and it's just the absolute sweetest/fluffiest smut possible? (Like this man has to be the KING of passionate but tender sex I just KNOW IT.) Thank you so much again! ❤️

You're very welcome, I hope you enjoy this one just as much!!❤️

Title: Making Up For Lost Time Pairing: Ilja Dragunov x AFAB!Reader Word Count: 2,572 Warnings: Smut, maybe a few swears

Your heart swells with pride as you watch Ilja soak in the cheers and applause of your peers, a mile-wide smile on your face when he turns to you to cup your face with both hands and plant a massive kiss on your cheek for everyone present as well as those watching from home to see before he’s pumping the air with his fist and making his way down to Shawn to shake his hand.

Are you happy for your best friend being called up to the main roster tonight? Of course you are, it goes without saying. He’s worked his ass off for this moment and you couldn’t be more proud of him. You’ve always supported him in everything he does, and the feeling is more than mutual, but as the night goes on and more and more superstars besides you are getting called up, a knot of anxiety twists in your stomach.

It’s just that you’ve always envisioned sharing this moment with Ilja, getting called up from NXT to the main roster on the same night as him. And admittedly, it does sting, you staying exactly where you are while he’s going up to Raw, and when you both get a moment alone together back at his hotel room once the dust settles after everything, it doesn’t take him long to see right through you.

“...Hey, I’ve been meaning to ask you all night,” Ilja stops himself mid-sentence, his faltering smile being replaced with a look of concern, “What’s wrong? I can tell something isn’t right.”

You’re about to give him a dismissive shake of the head in response at first, but you know it’s no use, nor will he be willing to accept that. The knot of anxiety that had been twisting in your stomach earlier in the night has returned with a vengeance, and you opt to tug at your jacket in a feeble attempt to steady your trembling hands while you take a deep breath.

“I’m fine, really. It’s…” you trail off, finding the right words, “I know how selfish this might sound, because this is your moment. But I guess I was hoping I’d be called up tonight, too. With you. And when I didn’t hear my name being called out, it felt so dejecting.”

The words spill from you like a floodgate has opened, but you’re still far from done yet. The frustration begins to gnaw at you, your chest tightening while unshed tears prick at your eyes, threatening to fall if so much as one more drop wells up in them.

“I’m not taking anything away from anyone else, because I know how hard everyone has worked, but when will it be my turn?” you choke out, finally looking him in the eyes, “And what’s getting to me the most is the thought of something changing between us now we probably won’t see each other as much. I honestly don’t know if I could take that. I don’t want us to drift at all.”

“(Y/N)...you know I won’t let that happen.”

Ilja frowns, taking a step closer to you. Seeing you so upset and frustrated about this tugs at his heartstrings, and while he knows he can’t completely fix the situation, he’ll walk through brick walls just to see you crack a smile again at the very least.

Shaking your head, you finally allow your tears to fall, the irritation getting the better of you as you break down in front of him. You don’t mean to, but you snap at him, and it’s as though your mouth is working too quickly for your brain to even comprehend.

“But what if it happens anyway, whether we want it to or not? I don’t think I could take that, because I love you, Ilja! I have for years, and I can’t pretend that I don’t for much longer. It’s killing me.”

The confession angrily spills from your lips before you can even stop yourself, and once you realise exactly what you’ve blurted out to Ilja, you stare at him with wide eyes while your heart hammers in your chest.

Silence hangs between you both like a fragile thread, leaving far too much room for doubts to creep in, and you fear you might have just ruined everything between you both. Ilja looks dumbfounded while he processes the new information, almost as though he can’t believe his ears. As if he can’t believe that you truly feel the same way as he does.

“...You have no idea how long I’ve waited to hear you say that,” Ilja’s gaze softens as reality eventually hits him like a freight train, “I’ve been hoping you’d say that.”

Ilja reaches out and tenderly caresses your face, his eyes boring into yours while your brain is playing catch up. You’ve been so afraid of taking the gamble for all these years out of fear of rejection and spoiling what you both have, yet here you are, both going all in with the highest payout either of you could have hoped for. 

You sniffle, still trembling from the onslaught of emotions you’ve gone through while you’re looking right back at him as you lean into his touch, relief washing over you when he doesn’t reject you. Then, after much contemplation, he leans down in a bold move and captures your lips with his own. The kiss is initially soft, a delicate exploration of new territory, but it quickly deepens when the passion between you ignites as you melt into each other.

“What have we been doing?” you ask him, breathless and smiling when you momentarily break the kiss, “All this time we’ve wasted-”

“Then why don’t we make up for it?”

Ilja rests his forehead against yours, his breathing staggered while he awaits your reaction. Your heart flutters in your chest at that, and rather than giving him a verbal response, your lips meet his again for another kiss with as equal fervour as the first one. Midway through the kiss, Ilja breaks away from you, but he leaves little room for any questions or confusion when he scoops you up in his arms and carries you to the bed instead, earning a soft gasp from you.

He approaches the bed with you in his arms, and he sets you down, giving you a moments’ breather before he joins you on the bed, hovering over you. Ilja leans forward and plants a soft kiss to your lips, one hand drifting to cup your cheek while the other ghosts along your side, slipping under your shirt to trace the curve of your waist. Shivers dance along your spine while his fingertips graze your skin, and you respond in kind by wrapping your arms around his neck to draw him in closer, deepening the kiss between you both.

“I love you, (Y/N).”

The words come easier to Ilja now, his voice breathy and raw with emotion while he gazes into your eyes with the utmost sincerity. He notices the way your breath catches at that, the way he sees the sincerity in your own eyes as you look right back at him, the way your smile grows.

“I love you, too, Ilja,” you say it back to him, just as easily, “I want you to make love to me.”

“I wouldn’t do this any other way.”

Ilja says before he presses his lips to yours again, mutual love and devotion now bleeding into the kiss. His hand moves to the hem of your shirt, and he gently lifts it up, starting his quest of beginning to reveal every inch of you to him. You sit up to aid him, allowing him to tug the garment over your head to leave you half naked before you lay back down, your back flat against the sheets once more. You gasp softly when he begins to leave a trail of kisses down your neck, to your collarbones, down your chest, until he reaches the waistband of your pants.

You shift underneath Ilja as he kisses his way down your body, your legs subconsciously parting for him to make way for himself to rest between them. His hands roam along your body, gradually drifting down to your pants, and you angle your hips up without him even having to ask or tell you to do so. Ilja chuckles at this, unzipping your pants before he tugs them down your thighs, then down your legs completely before he discards them, leaving you laying on the bed in nothing but your panties.

“You are breathtaking,” he smiles at you, his eyes full of affection, “Absolutely beautiful.”

You blush at the compliment, resisting the urge to bury your face in the covers to hide how much you’re beaming from ear to ear. But when Ilja tears himself away from marvelling at the sight of you before him, he seemingly realises how overdressed he actually is, and him beginning to undress himself is what prevents you from averting your eyes.

Ilja has your full, undivided attention when he begins with his jacket, shrugging it off with ease and unceremoniously letting it drop to the floor before he’s loosening his tie and tossing it across the room. Then, almost as though he’s wanting you to savour the moment, he slowly starts to unbutton his shirt, exposing his bare torso to you bit by bit while you lay back and enjoy the show.

Your eyes rake over him as he undresses, your mind running rampant as you imagine every possible avenue tonight could go down. When he throws his shirt to one side and kicks his shoes off before he begins unzipping his pants, you feel your pussy throb in a mix of sheer need and anticipation rolled into one when it hits you yet again that this is really happening.

“And to think, you didn’t even give me the chance to tell you how overdressed you were.”

You muse, earning a chuckle from Ilja. His eyes remain glued to yours, but when his pants slip down his thighs, then his legs entirely, your gaze is somewhere else. You whet your lips when you catch sight of the outline of his hardening cock in his boxers, and Ilja smirks triumphantly when he takes note of you staring.

“We’re making up for lost time, are we not?”

He quips, stepping out of the pants pooling at his ankles in favour of rejoining you on the bed instead in his rightful position between your legs. There, his hand drifts home, slipping beneath your panties, finding you slick and wet already.

He gingerly rubs your clit to drag a soft groan out of you, increasing the pressure as he revels in every sweet sound that proceeds to fall from your lips as if they’re literal music to his ears. His fingers glide through your folds, gathering up your slick with ease before he slips two fingers inside you and curls them oh so deliciously, and you already subtly buck your hips, needing more from him.

“Ilja, I want more,” you groan softly, pleading with him, “I need more.”

And he certainly isn’t prepared to deprive you of that. Ilja slides his fingers out of you and out of your panties, now honing in on the waistband of the remaining offending garment before he slowly tugs them down to bare every last inch of you to him.

He feels his cock twitch, seeing you spread your legs for him once you kick your panties off to the side, and he can’t hold back for much longer, the overwhelming urge to please you to your heart’s content now consuming him. Ilja drags his boxers down, letting his cock spring free before he positions himself between your legs, lining himself up with your entrance.

“Are you ready for me?” Ilja asks, his cock in his hand as he brushes it against your folds, “I’m definitely ready for you.”

“I’m more than ready.”

Your eyes are filled with desire, breath hitching as you give him an affirming nod. A soft whimper escapes your lips as he slowly pushes himself inside you, feeling your tight walls enveloping him. His pace is slow at first, each thrust of his deliberate, savouring the feeling of your bodies coming together as one.

Your moans fill the room, quickly muffled by his Ilja’s lips against yours as he sets out to swallow each one. You arch into his touch, and he grips your thighs as he deepens the kiss, clinging to you as the soft slap of skin against skin gradually intensifies.

“Is this good for you?” Ilja asks, his breathing now slightly laboured, “I want to make you feel as incredible as you make me feel-”

“It’s more than good for me, god…please, don’t stop!”

He grunts and groans at that, bucking his hips slightly harder, determined to get you to where you want to be. You let out a moan when he grazes the right spot inside you, and it only grows louder when he catches it over and over again with impeccable precision.

Your arms snake around his neck, drawing him impossibly closer, and he seizes the opportunity to whisper sweet nothings in your ear while a hand releases its grip on your thigh to slip between you both, rubbing slow circles over your clit.

“If you keep doing that, I might explode-”

You precaution him, despite that being the precise desired end goal you both have in mind. Knowing you’re right on the precipice, each drive of Ilja’s hips becomes more purposeful, and your nails sink into his shoulders as the need for your release grows and grows.

“Then let go for me, love,” Ilja tells you, peppering your neck with kisses, “Let me feel you cum around me.”

With that, Ilja feels you tense under him, your walls clamping around his cock as you cum with a whine of his name, clinging onto him like your life depends on it. All you see is hot white as you arch your back in utter bliss, going limp under him shortly after while you soak in the aftershocks of your orgasm.

Seeing you fall apart under him is enough to drive Ilja himself over the edge, his own climax surging through him. He groans your name, burying himself to the hilt before he’s spilling himself inside you. He collapses forward onto you, being mindful of not resting too heavily on you. Your hearts pound in unison as you both lay there, completely spent, your bodies entwined.

Ilja rolls off to the side and allows himself a moment to bask in the afterglow while he also attempts to catch his breath. Your chest heaves, your face flushed as you lay there with a satisfied smile on your face, and it only grows wider when he curls an arm around you and pulls you closer to him, encouraging you to nestle into his side.

“Now, when I tell you that I love you, and that things are never going to change between us,” Ilja hums, carding his fingers through your hair before he presses a tender kiss to your temple, “Do you believe me?”

“Well, they definitely won’t change for the worst, at least,” you giggle softly, splaying a hand across his chest as you trace haphazard patterns there, “But I do, yes. And I love you, too. More than you know.”

[mulders-too-large-shirt]

s3 episode 1 thoughts

wow… how much time has progressed… and to think, a mere two months ago, i barely knew these character’s names, let alone that they will likely stick with me for eternity...

let us begin. as we always must do.

okay, so i’m reading the episode description: scully is facing a possible dismissal!!! i know she broke rules but it was for FRIENDSHIP and LOVE! does that not count for anything anymore?!

(spooky noise) (dried up alien shot) (voice of disembodied narrative) last season on the X files…

(a recap of cig man burning things)

we open back in New Mexico, to Albert describing his relationship to memory and history: “memory is radiant and immutable, while history serves only those who seek to control it” <- banger line.

anyway. we see the smoldering ruins of that train car that was once full of aliens. but not a single mulder in sight…

cig man is breaking into the kind people’s houses!! he and his cronies are conducting violence… THEY HIT ALBERT IN THE HEAD NOOO??? HE IS A HERO... cig man, you are less than a mosquito to me

scully time!!! she’s on the scene… guess she didn’t get far back to DC. “where is he?” she asks, and they look at each other with concern in their eyes. oh, they don’t know...

eric walks into the room with a terribly beaten face... NOOO ERIC, THEY SHOULD HAVE NEVER DONE THIS TO YOU.

now scully is screaming for him on the cliffs whilst the smoke still billows from the train where he was last seen… no response… it is not looking good for our friend mulder!!

she finally tries to go home, and a helicopter is shining on scully. RIGHT on her. this is not good for driving. they run her off the road with no regard for anyone's safety??? could have caused a MASSIVE pileup.

anyway, they grab her and it’s upsetting, asking where the files are and she says in the trunk. do we believe her??? it’s a copy of some of them, but not the DAT, which i would guess means the original cassette tape... oh nooo i’m scared… i mean she couldn’t deny it, but it’s also not looking good for the secrets she was trying to keep. so, without the "DAT", they just leave.

back at the FBI, they are telling her she needs to take a leave of absence. she is looking at the ground and it is once again giving student in the principal’s office. NO PAY OR BENEFITS??? you can't do that... what if she needs to go to the doctor......

i guess she is a doctor but the point stands. you NEED insurance in these parts.

she gives them her badge and gun and says she thinks mulder is dead :( NOOOOO you cannot admit defeat

skinner says “don’t think this hasn’t been difficult for everyone” and she is holding back a very very very biting remark but actually manages to hold it back, so god only knows what she wanted to say. a stronger woman than i.

until she leaves the room, that is!!! skinner comes out to talk to her and OH SHE IS MAD!!

“what about the people who are poisoning agent mulder’s water? whose protocol was that? the men who killed agent mulder, the people who killed his father- they aren’t meant to be found”

“we will find them”

“with all due respect, sir, I think you overestimate your position in the chain of command” <- OHHHH TEA. she basically said, you're a liar working for liars and perpetuating lies. meanwhile WE'RE the only real bitches at the function and one of ‘em’s dead because of YOUR pet cigarette man. SICK!!!!! truly evil.

now she has to find some work to pay the bills skinner!!

(i don't think skinner is evil, i just think he's a dick sometimes and that pisses me off more than sheer evilness. EACH time i think i have him figured out. he does something that proves me wrong)

one last visit to mulder's office before she leaves. she's going to take the real files on the cassette and they are GONE??? to whom have they gone…..

back in new york city. it's a meeting of the minds, all the big names in the world of covering up the existence of aliens. cig man is saying everything is fine, mulder is dead, and all the files are back. ALLEGEDLY!! i believe him on no accounts.

GASP scully going to her mom’s house… she walked there barefoot at night because her shoes hurt her :(

“i’ve made a terrible mistake. dad would be so ashamed of me” NOOOOOOOOOOOO DON’T SAY THAT!!!

(i cannot speak to the moral character of her father but if it were me, i would say it was doing the Right thing that counts far more than following corrupt orders from a corrupt system. and this is further proof that she is one of those people who Has to do the right thing or the guilt will consume her... )

and she DID do the right thing!!!! she just doesn't have faith!!!! i'll cry!!!

buzzards back in New Mexico… oh........

HAND SPOTTED!! white man’s hand in the rocks. is it mulder smushed?????? 

IT IS!! albert and co are hauling him out of a hole, and he’s looking quite dead, but he seems to have hid in a cave with the aliens. good on him for finding a convenient hole to duck into.

they’re doing a ceremony to call the Holy People!!!! i hope it works because remember, the calusari said mulder knows the devil and that seems contradictory...

hopefully they were just lying.

scully back home. sleeping in bed. answering the door, for someone knocks.

it’s FROHIKE???? i cackled. WHY does he know where she lives! and also why is he here when she is in her robe! well. i guess mourning will have you up and about at odd hours.

he drank a whole bottle of what looks like vodka...? and described mulder as “a redwood among mere sprouts” i laughed... it's so genuine. we all know a frohike, for better or for worse.

he assumes that she will be next in line for hunting The Truth, to which she replies, “i’m soon to be out of a job”. but she's a doctor, so it is gonna be okay. maybe she can just leave the last few months off her resume and get letters of recommendation from her professors. doctors, high in demand.

"and like rats, they just scatter back into the woodpile” she says, when discussing how these secretive people pull the strings behind the curtains. i took note because this is a yeehaw-sounding saying.

i guess we don't ever learn where she grew up, because it probably wasn't in one place, with her dad in the navy... but still. such a phrase is giving some sort of appalachia.

frohike brings bad news: the thinker was killed EXECUTION STYLE and found in a landfill... this is soooo fucked up. she is shocked they would do something so stupid and i was like ??? but ohh she's talking about tracing the bullets!

(i only realized this much later. i won't lie)

back in New Mexico, albert is working overtime calling the Holy People to come help, and mulder's floating out in space as he contemplates leaving this plane… 

people are surrounding him. perhaps the holy people or his ancestors??

but no, it is... DEEP THROAT??? I’VE MISSED YOU!!! it was nice to see him again, even for a brief moment in the astral plane.

he’s going on, very theatrically, about the absence of time in whatever it is inhabits after life: “i come to you, old friend, with the dull clarity of the dead, not to beckon you, but to feel the fire and intensity that still live in you…. there is truth here, if that is what you seek, but there is no justice or judgement, without which, truth is a vast, dead hallow” <- he has been reading Shakespeare in the afterlife 

no i actually loved that line. it goes hard. "the dull clearity of the dead". i'm eating that arrangement of words up

cutscene: aliens being gassed and locked in the railroad car. that’s…. Horrific 

(this scene takes mere seconds, and isn't addressed again in any real way in the episode, but holy. it was. unsettling. what did these bastards do to them....?)

back to the commune with the deceased. it's Bill! mr. mulder! he opens his eyes at his dad’s voice. his dad says he’s very sorry for lying about the whole alien thing, and says he is the memory; “if you were to die now, the truth would die, and only the lies survive us”. so no pressure whatsoever. /s

seemingly awake now, he asks if his sister is in the realm with the rest of those who have passed. and he learns she isn't there yet, so i'm pretty sure that makes up his mind, that he'll go back. but imagine if the answer was yes, she was there... do you think he would have still found the strength to return?

back in D.C., scully has to take the visitor’s entrance to the FBI :( but the security guard knows her!!! she is friendly in this way :) she beeps suspiciously... but he lets her though. i suspect that she might be hiding something... but what?

she's waiting for skinner. and ohhh skinner didn’t call her “agent” this time...ohhh the vibes are…….. not really vibing. it is uncomfortable.

she is bringing the news article to him and suggesting cross running the weapon that killed the thinker with the weapon that killed mulder’s dad to get some answers. this seems reasonable to me! he says she has been relieved of investigative duty and basically dismisses her. but she just wants to be helpful!!!! can you blame her??? she just wants to be HELPFUL, skinner, she wants her friend back and not dead. so please DON'T say something catty right now, i SWEAR.

SKINNER. I HATE YOU SOMETIMES. “ohhh the systems would have went off” so there is no need to cross reference the weapons. they’re killing people executioner style!!!! do you really think the people at the police department wouldn’t cover such a thing up?!?!? come ON let's use our heads!!!

he parrots her earlier line about him not having as much power as he thinks... ohhh you bitch. you should both be on the same team here and that team is "please let agent mulder be ALIVE"

he’s all “oh, you just wanna be helpful because you want your job back?” and she very firmly says NO. i just want answers. and honestly, she is handling this way better than i would be. because i would be biting and clawing skinner at this moment. to imply that she just wants her JOB back when she's trying to bring him information regarding a bunch of mysterious deaths, including that of her PARTNER?!?!?

so he says to bring him the cassette tape that she DOESN’T have or otherwise sit tight and let them do their job. and there is unbridled rage in her eyes but it somehow manages to not escape beyond body language and again, applause. 

pause. i’m actually so pissed on scully's behalf right now. and i just KNOW filming these scenes had to be fun.

as always in skinner's office, Bill Clinton watches over everything. his eyes are cold and uncaring. like a god who has abandoned its creation.

the MINUTE she leaves his office, cig man enters... SICK!!!! he's asking about the tape that he earlier claimed to the squad in new york that he got back… “that’s unfortunate”, he says, when he learns she doesn't have it. did he PLANT IT ON HER?? is that what the beeping was? do cassettes beep on metal detectors? i had some as a kid, i just remember feelings of plastic when holding them <-op was NOT onto something here

upon leaving, she is confused about the thingy beeping again. “you wearing a necklace or something?”, asks the security man. “no, not today”, and...... OH.... THE VISUAL INDICATOR THAT SHE HAS LOST ALL FAITH IN THE FORM OF HER CROSS NECKLACE BEING ABSENT. AUGHHHH TEARING MY SHIRT. ripping my hair out in grief. but that leaves the real question: what is in there?

she goes to the doctor, who looks at her neck. SOMETHING IS IN HER SKIN??? embedded in there. oh... it’s scarred over and they’re gonna pull it out, and i'm thinking i might gag if they show it, but thankfully they cut then. WHAT DID THEY DO TO HER IN ALIEN LAND????

back to the New Mexico cam!!! mulder progress!! three days of chanting and he is asking for water!! good news. 

back to D.C. no extraction scene visible, thank god. COMPUTER CHIP???? IN HER NECK??? did they microchip her... so they can track her location... or is it some sort of coded information... oh this is soooo evil

back talking with melissa!!!! my witchy best friend!!! melissa wants scully to unpack her memories, but can you blame her for NOT wanting to do that?? does reliving alien testing sound fun to you??? but, despite her reservations, she goes to a hypnotherapist anyway because she is a good sister and melissa played the "please? for me?" card

(damn, this show sure has a lot of hypnotherapy. it’s funny because i have never encountered it at all outside of this show. maybe it was the big thing at the time? and they wanted to be cool and trendy?)

but we’re back now, in repressed memory town, circa the Duane Barry era. regarding whoever was conducting the tests on her, she says she couldn’t resist them. hey what does THAT mean!!!

things look close to getting revealed when she says it’s time to go. like i said, i can imagine this is probably top ten worst sensations of all time.

so she drives back home and skinner is there??? HUH???? she looks sooooo gagged. and i was too.

(tell me why. oh god this is awful. tell me why my first reaction was “she must be going back to her mom's place... and he’s dating scully’s mom”) (cue the "i'm going to start dating her HARDER" scene from the office)

back in New Mexico. to end the ceremony, mulder must not do any work, change clothes, or bathe for 4 days. PLEASE DO THIS THING MY FRIEND. the boys give him a pouch for sunflower seeds, which he asked for during the worst of his fevers. the sunflower seeds... that when he heard them as a kid, reminded him he was not the last person in the universe... my sweet babygirl, who is a grown man breaking many many laws... glad to have you back in our world

albert shares that he went to the origin place, so overall, this mission seems to have been a success. so please, mulder, do NOT screw this up!!! sit in a hotel room and eat your seeds in your dirty clothes just do NOT break the rules of the ceremony that just saved your life.

scully calls skinner, asking why he was at her place, and he denies ever being at her apartment. BUT cig man is sitting right in front of him soooo it wouldn't have been a good time to talk anyway...

mulder is monologuing into the abyss, as he has found a way to infiltrate scully’s dreams!! very impressive!!

cutscene to his father’s his funeral. scully is there. because she is fundamentally good. she hasn’t met his mother before, right? i recall thinking earlier their first exchange might not go well, because of the whole sacrificed the “sister” for her in the hostage exchange deal thing...

but it actually goes as well as a first meeting a funeral can go. and without citing her prophetic dreams, scully tells her that she has a strong feeling he will be found. scully engaging in the supernatural...? are her sisters words ringing in her ear? or does she interpret a prophetic message dream as a message from the subconscious. i don't even think she knows.

meanwhile, a suspicious man watches this. he wants to talk to her away from the others. he makes some vague sort of reference to the UN league of alien safeguarding, and he says with confidence that mulder is dead.

AND THEN HE STARTS DESCRIBING HOW SHE WILL BE MURDERED???? okay could we GET any more unsettling. survey is saying no. anyway, she will be murdered with either with an unregistered weapon and people who will be out of the country right after the crime has been committed, or by someone she trusts visiting her house. uh oh… skinner looking sus

she asks why she is worth killing: "you want something they don’t- justice” hmm. many such cases in american history.

this guy claims to be tipping her off because his colleagues are acting “impulsively” and her death would just draw attention to them. i mean they have already killed like, 3 people if you count presumed dead mulder, but maybe one more would really push it over the edge?

mulder’s mom comes home. AND HE’S THERE!!!! in different clothes. 4 days had best have passed. i refuse to contemplate that he violated the terms of the ceremony.

okay, back from the dead, and he is interrogating his mom about his dad. she is not answering any questions- does she truly not remember or is she just deflecting... she wants to know what the deal is, and he grabs a gun and says it has to do with samantha. and leaves ominously. that man sure does want to make a dramatic exit.

missy wants to come over (scully calls her sister missy!), and she says to come over. but then someone immediately calls and hangs up- a universal sign of danger, as scully knows. she tries to call missy back, but she doesn't pick up the phone. so she calls back and she says she’ll go over to missy's place instead. the air is very very tense. something is about to go down. but what? 

running to her car. and IT'S SKINNER? he says to get in the car. scully goes in anyway but is very clearly suspicious he’ll kill her. AND SHE PULLS THE GUN ON HIM WHEN THEY GET TO MULDER'S PLACE!

“don’t turn around, or I’ll blow your head off” TEAAA! let out some of that rage i was earlier commenting was so well managed.

“don’t think I won’t do it, you son of a bitch” “no, I believe you” <- LMAOOOO he knows she is NOT messing around. and he does everything she asks of him, even sitting on his hands.

NOOOOO MELISSA GOES TO SCULLY'S PLACE AND KRYCHEK SHOOTS HER????? WHAAAAAAAAAAT???? he looks down and realizes it isn't scully, so he tells his companion that they should just leave. absolutely useless flop of a man. how did he even get into the FBI. maybe they'll just take anyone.

back to mulder's place. skinner claims he has the tape, and that he took it from mulder's desk. then why would he have sent her on the fool's errand of trying to find it? and now they BOTH have guns drawn on each other… as someone approaches the door…. presumably mulder coming home???

OHHHHHH this is the first time i have wanted to drop absolutely EVERYTHING and go straight into the next episode, writeup be damned. AUGHHH. what about melissa!!!!!! please let her make it PLEASE I CAN’T WATCH SCULLY ENDURE THIS!!!! can you imagine if she walks in the door and sees her sister bleeding out... hopefully krychek was too much of a failure to even land a lethal wound.

and honestly, from the moment I laid eyes on Krychek way back in s2, so long ago, i KNEW that he was a fucking rat. like. evil evil evil. idk how they’re gonna try and make me like him again if they decide to keep him on as a recurring character, but i truly do NOT give a fuck about what sort of backstory they come up with for him. i’m choosing anger over healing here. 

i’m that guy by the cork board pinning things with string and smoking a cigarette until all the things line up because truly WHAT is going on!!!! 

really great episode; the pacing and suspense were fantastic, i feel pumped to start a new season, i have a million questions but in an exciting rather than an overwhelming way, skinner you are once again on thin ice!!!

[mbti-notes]

Anon wrote: Hi, i had a question regarding my 19yo friend. She was typed as an INFP then ENFJ on 16p, although i had doubts because i don’t trust that website, i believe she’s an ENFJ with Fe issues and a undeveloped Ni.

She is strongly affected by what happens in the « external » world, like for exemple today someone was pushed on the railway when a train was coming and everyone was shocked, which is completely normal. But she had a huge meltdown, she bursted in tears when she started to think about how everyone must have felt, how the relatives of the victim will feel, how the victim himself will feel if he survives, and was heavily overwhelmed. As an ENFJ myself i thought the same, and i felt uneasy, but i was able to distance myself from the whole situation. She on the other hand, started to feel really sick and say things like « life isn’t worth living in a world where things like this happen » like very dark thoughts and a long rant about the world in general, about a massive fear of death due to previous experiences, about how she felt out of touch with reality.

Generally speaking, she has a huge problem with the concept of reality. She told me that she just couldn’t accept the fact that things were as they are although she was aware of it, that she felt as such she had two personalities : one who was really pessimistic and in tune with reality and another who was trapped in a bubble where she dismissed all of it. She couldn’t accept that we lived in a world were such atrocious stuffs were happening everywhere, and has an extreme ideal of saving the whole world on her own.

I told her that although she was aware of it she seemed to not accept it, and that it may be a huge part of the problem. I also told her that that ideal was just out of reach, and listed the reasons, and she told me that although she knew she just felt like she just had to try harder.

I also noticed that she could be really judgmental with people, while she was explaining to me that she was frustrated that they weren’t aware of the state of the world and couldn’t « use their brain properly » that they were « dumb ». She seems to hold unreasonable standards of people in general, a recent exemple is her last relationship where she basically made a contract with her ex, listing everything she was expecting from him and that he had to sign, and when he stopped to fulfill those conditions she dumped him. She only seeks him when she needs attention and when me and a friend explained to her that it was unhealthy because of the unreasonable standards and the fact that she wanted to him to constantly support her emotionally, but she just didn’t get what was wrong even if she recognized that she shouldn’t engage in a relationship in that state of mind.

So i wanted to know what could explain it in her stacks and how to help her to be more aware of it ? As i said i think acceptance plays a huge role, and that it could be related to an underdeveloped Ni (also with the fact that she seems too involved with the external world and not enough with her inner world + that she seems to judge people solely on external factors). She also showed signs of loops and grips (that perhaps could explain her « two personalities » and extreme high and lows in general).

I hope i provided enough infos, thanks for reading allat !

-----------------

I'm not entirely clear what you're asking. If this is a question about type assessment, all requests must follow the submission instructions on the contact page, otherwise, I can't do a proper analysis. The info you've provided isn't as relevant to type as you believe it is.

What you're mainly describing is emotional immaturity, which is a separate issue from type, and an issue that anyone of any type can suffer. And judgmentalness is a common symptom of emotional immaturity. Sure, different types may express emotional immaturity somewhat differently depending on the functions involved. However, if all you see/know about them is their emotional immaturity, I guarantee that you won't have enough info to do an accurate assessment. A lot of people mistype themselves because they equate emotional immaturity to this or that function, when the two need to be examined separately.

You've made a few points in an effort to convince me of ENFJ. My way of doing type assessment aims for certainty, I don't like to guess. I thoroughly argue for and against all 16 types in order to determine the right answer. I won't draw a conclusion unless I'm quite confident. The points you've presented aren't enough to arrive at confidence, let alone certainty, for example:

(1) "Not being able to accept reality" is usually a good indicator of N. But beware that this has to be a long-term recurring pattern, not just a one-off situational thing. Experiencing extreme circumstances or repeatedly encountering negative events can be difficult for anyone of any type to accept. There needs to be other evidence in support of N, especially the N method of processing info (i.e. the cognitive component).

(2) Being too involved with the external world to the detriment of one's inner world is a weak argument by itself because it's easy to rebut with common exceptions to the rule. For example, some introverts (such as ISFP or INFJ involved in politics) can care very deeply about what's going on in the external world, and anxiety about negative events can certainly make them appear as though they are too involved. Another example rebuttal: one could argue that extraverts should have a better time accepting/adapting to the external world, so the fact that she can't might indicate she's not E. I'm not saying she's E or I; I'm saying that this point alone isn't sufficient for being certain. You'll need much more evidence of E/I than this.

(3) Yes, it's generally true that a person suffering from chronic loop and grip problems can appear to have "two personalities". She mentioned "delusional" versus "pessimistic", but this isn't helpful for type assessment. Neither of these is healthy, so on what basis can we determine the functional axes? The "two personalities" should actually denote the healthy vs unhealthy sides of the personality. For the dominant and auxiliary functions, there must be some evidence of normal and healthy function use, which even the most emotionally immature people should still express at times. You haven't provided this info, so nothing more to do on this point.

(4) Perhaps you mean to say that her "worrying" and "savior complex", in part, counts as a healthy expression of Fe because it shows her care for others and society. That may or may not be true, but it doesn't guarantee ENFJ. While a savior complex is most often associated with xNFJ, there are other types who are known to exhibit it as well, e.g., ENFP, ENTP, ESTP, ESTJ, ENTJ, INTJ. You say she feels very deeply about the suffering of others, which indicates a high capacity for emotional empathy, but that isn't necessarily Fe. Some of the most empathetic people I've ever known were ENFP. I'm not saying she is any of these types; I'm saying that there's not enough info provided to rule out all the other types, which is a necessary step in the type assessment process.

Yes, you are right to not trust websites that only use simple tests. If you want to use tests properly, you must recognize and accept their limitations. They can only offer you an approximation at best. As you can see by the arguments I made above, typing people accurately is a complex matter because human psychology is far more complicated than any test can capture. It's also a cause for suspicion when you think she's the same type as you, since all people are prone to projection when evaluating others.

If your question is really about how to help your friend, I'm afraid there's not much I can say. First, you can't really do much to help someone who doesn't believe they need help or doesn't want help. You can't force people to change when they're not ready or willing.

Second, emotionally immature people are highly prone to faulty emotional reasoning. A person who isn't basing their judgments/beliefs on facts and logic isn't going to be responsive to facts and logic. In other words, you can't argue with people's feelings. You can't actually invalidate people's feelings. People feel what they feel and there's no stopping them from feeling.

If your friend were to come to me directly to express that they wanted to become more emotionally mature, that would be a different story. Being able to acknowledge a problem is the important first step for personal growth, but it sounds like she's not there yet. There are plenty of ways to improve one's emotional intelligence, which I've written about before and I've recommended books about it as well. It's a solvable problem, with some self-work.

This doesn't mean there's absolutely nothing you can do. I'm only warning that your help might not be very effective when it isn't wanted. The best thing you can do is continue to be a good friend. Being a good friend involves many things, and one of the most important tasks a friend can take on is to always tell the truth.

Telling the truth is a very tricky matter, in terms of communication. When the way you tell the truth is too blunt or injuring, it can backfire and make people double down on their faulty beliefs. However, if you're able to communicate the truth in an objective, impartial, matter-of-fact, and caring way, people will generally be more receptive. In other words, you can't come across as a threat or having any kind of ulterior motive.

If you are correct about ENFJ and the need for Ni development, then the cognitive ability she needs to develop involves learning how to adjust her perspective. Actually, learning how to reframe one's perspective is generally a good way to deal with many psychological maladies, including anxiety and depression. Her view of things is much too small and simple-minded due to the emotional immaturity. Anything you can do to encourage her to shift her perspective closer to objective truth would be helpful in the long run. (However, this assumes you are in greater possession of the truth than she is.)

Helping stubborn people is difficult. It involves repeatedly seeding helpful ideas to them in subtle ways, until they start to shift. It could take one or two conversations, or it could take years and years of conversations. If you want to keep having those conversations with her, then do so, but you have to manage your expectations. Be patient and don't expect immediate results.

[emmg]

Serious Writing Can Go Eat Ass: A Memoir

As someone who professionally churns out words for the academic circle jerk—a place where people basically worship the Chicago Manual of Style—it feels like there's this massive disdain, or maybe more like unfiltered contempt, for anything resembling fun in writing. Want to spice up an article with some personality? Throw in a funny quote? Craft a clever phrase that might break the mind-numbing monotony? Well, too bad. It will be swiftly dismissed and frowned upon by "peers" who clutch their red pens like they’re about to perform a literary exorcism.

This disdain doesn’t just stop at academic writing either. Oh no, it follows you into your creative life, like a clingy ex, making you feel guilty for producing anything outside the suffocating realm of “serious” content. You want to write something a little frivolous? Maybe funny? Maybe smutty? Maybe just angsty trash? Well, you better remember that it's not "serious" writing, and thus, has no worth. Or maybe you’ll hear that professor's voice in your head, the one who scrawled passive-aggressive margin notes admonishing you for taking a single, harmless stylistic risk. And just like that, it becomes second nature to hate or feel embarrassed by whatever you produce for fun.

Don’t get me wrong, I love academia. I’ve worked as a model since my early teens, which means I’ve spent most of my life living in a constant state of disconnection—always moving, always on the outside looking in. So, I turned inward, and I read. And read. And read some more. I learned and absorbed everything I could. When I finally made it to university and discovered this obsessive, laser-focused intellectual pursuit—complete with professors who actually encouraged my hyperfixation—it was like stepping into nerd heaven. The research, the archives, the thrill of translating that one obscure quote, the victory of pestering some librarian across the country for months and finally getting access to those oral histories—it’s exhilarating. I’m addicted.

But man, does this “serious” environment suck the joy out of anything that isn’t deemed important or intellectual. It’s fantastic at making you feel ashamed for enjoying "lesser" forms of creativity.

In this essay I will—no, but seriously, let me just give you my Ted Talk on how traditional writing conventions can absolutely, 100% eat ass. Maybe quite literally. They drain all the enjoyment out of writing. I love writing, but I hate looking at what I produce because of it.

On the flip side, I absolutely love the time we’re living in. Thank God for AO3. I adore fanfiction. I love that there’s no joy-sucking overlord policing my words when I get lost in a fandom and write purely for the fun of it. That’s true freedom.

This is exactly why I'm so hardcore about the whole comments/kudos culture. I will absolutely drown anyone who graciously shares their work with the world in praise. Why? Because I freaking love what they create, and I refuse to let anyone feel the way I do—like their creativity doesn’t matter. So yes, thank you, bless you, saint you, for sharing your fanfiction. I will devour every word, and then I’ll devour you, dear author, in an avalanche of gratitude. Keep writing, or I swear, I'll find you and flood your inbox with even more love.

I really wish my professional life hadn’t done such an impressive job of absolutely wrecking my self-esteem when it comes to personal writing. I don’t even give a second glance at what I toss out into the world anymore. Just yeet it into the depths of AO3 and forget it ever existed. Notifications? Turned off. Comments? Oh, I’m far too mortified to respond—though I make a half-hearted attempt sometimes. It’s that weird feeling of being undeserving, or embarrassed, or something equally stupid.

I don’t even know if I’m alone in this feeling. Maybe I am. Maybe I’m not. It’s just a random slice of my thoughts. I’m 28, I shouldn’t feel like I have to hate my creative side for not being “serious.” I’m too young to be this bitter about what I create. Not that there’s an age limit on this kind of existential dread. Anyway, thanks for coming to my impromptu mental breakdown. Peace.

[k7l4d4]

K Reviews and Rants: Miraculous Ladybug Season 5! Episode 4

Hello, hello, anyone and everyone willing to give me a chance! On the advice of a friend, I've decided to mix things up a bit by giving my thoughts on this episode now that I've had time to think it over, once the veil of incredible RAGE has passed.

I gotta say, what annoys me the most about this episode, in hindsight, is how... dismissive it is. It reduces basically one of the most potentially crucial and insightful moments for Marinette as a character, a chance to think back on everything she's done over the show, good and bad... and boils it down to the writers having Marinette and everyone around her fixate on her crush, as if it's the deciding point upon which her entire life revolves around. It's just such a waste of a good plot, of Marinette thinking on where she's gone wrong in life. And I'm left feeling depressed and cheated at what could've been. That's not even getting into how this episode in particular... really makes Marinette look like a completely self-centered jerk.

Anyway, with my brief pity party over, onto the review! Warning as always for profanity.

Episode 4: Jubilation 

Alright, we get an introduction with Marinette looking at an ad for the Alliance Rings, and Tikki pointing out that she's still "in love with Adrien." Like, NO DUH!! You don't just "stop being in love, or having a crush" just because you want to, that isn't how emotions WORK!! We also got Marinette blaming what happened with the Miraculouses on her "loving Adrien" and I'm just... NO!! As much as I fucking hate the Love Square, THAT IS NOT WHAT HAPPENED!! SERIOUSLY, STOP TRYING TO MAKE EVERYTHING IN THIS SHOW ABOUT THE FUCKING LOVE SQUARE ALREADY!! This didn't happen because of "love," this happened because of freak coincidence, and while it's not unreasonable for Marinette not to realize that, given that Felix is nowhere to be seen, IT IS STILL IDIOTIC TO JUMP TO THAT CONCLUSION! What HAPPENED had nothing to do with her being "in love," and had EVERYTHING to do with the fact that she has not EVEN ONCE managed to keep her emotions under control when it COMES to Adrien!! Her problem is that she refuses to acknowledge she HAS a problem. Even THIS is just her avoiding the actual issue!! God DAMMIT Astruc, how do you fuck up what should be a fairly straightforward plot about Marinette analyzing herself and learning discipline!? 

Oh great, and here comes everyone's "favorite Principal" playing superhero again. Now, to be blunt, I wouldn't MIND this... even with the last time he showed up in colored undies having him "realize" he should stop playing hero or something to that effect, it's clearly something he's passionate about and he's just honestly trying to help (in his own dumb way)... but this is fucking pathetic. Thomas, what in the world is portraying a man hanging by his clothing after failing to rescue a cat from a high place supposed to show!? It just makes him look sad and pathetic. For a series ABOUT Superheroes, mocking or portraying someone who honestly wants to BE a superhero as a joke is in poor taste in general. 

And just recycling a plot? Seriously!? There wasn't any OTHER way to reuse this guy besides making fun of his passion? It's the height of laziness. And... we get a Ladybug Cosplayer. Who Marinette apparently knows... Oh boy. It's one of THOSE plots. 

Socqueline... a "school friend from last year." Correct me if I'm wrong, but wasn't a MASSIVE part of the first season's set-up, Origins in particular, about how Marinette apparently didn't have ANY FRIENDS AT ALL!? Now, this... this wouldn't be that big of a problem... if it weren't for what's coming next. 

Pardon me while I go on a rant within a rant: Monster. You had... a high school girl... call Chloe Bourgeois a MONSTER unironically, Thomas. What. The Complete. AND UTTER. FUCK!? No no, none of that, SHUT THE FUCK UP WITH THAT NOISE. She is a fucking HUMAN BEING who you have bent over backwards to demonize for either trivially petty bullshit, blatantly hypocritical double-standards, and just plain DENYING CHILD ABUSE EVEN WHEN YOU PORTRAY IT FOR THE WORLD TO SEE!!! you do not get to have ANYONE call her a monster. Ever. Shut the fuck up, and don't let the door hit you on the way out. 

And now, to resume my original rant. See, Marinette knew exactly where to FIND Socqueline, without any issue whatsoever. She knew precisely where she would be. And yet, they apparently haven't seen each other in a while. Thomas... How do you portray Marinette THIS FUCKING BADLY AT BEING A FRIEND!? Because when you have it set up that Marinette knows precisely where Socqueline WORKS, then how the fuck has it been that they haven't seen one another in awhile!? Like, the ONLY WAY this really makes sense is if they either A) weren't that close of friends and meeting back up just hadn't occurred to them, or B) somehow BOTH OF THESE IDIOTS never thought to try and reach out and meet back up, even though there's no fucking law that I'm aware of that would've stopped them. Even ignoring the later bullshit, this is completely and utterly idiotic. 

Okay, and it turns out that Socqueline has a crush on Adrien too (although it's more obviously a crush and not a crush dressed up as being "in love with him" like it is with Marinette). They really are just... trying to make Socqueline be on the exact same wavelength as Marinette, aren't they? That's just... you don't need to have people have the same overall personality and interests and living situations to pull of a fucking case of MISTAKEN FUCKING IDENTITY!!! Gaaahhh! This is gonna be annoying, I can just TELL. 

Yeah, she's a fangirl. Ughh... also, if she's a big fan of Adrien as depicted, and she's Marinette's friend... how the FUCK did Marinette not know who Adrien was during Origins!? 

Okay, the dialog just now included a moment of Socqueline stating "I should've stayed back a year." Which... to me... shoots a MASSIVE HOLE in her backstory regarding an upcoming episode. Namely, by implicating that she had a CHOICE in whether to stay or go. 

Honestly? A bit of an aside, but I kinda would've enjoyed seeing standoffish Adrien, what with him being homeschooled for literally his whole life and his only public interactions being press events and model work. 

Marinette... why the FUCK are you running your mouth about Adrien's personal life and secrets to a girl you haven't even TALKED TO IN ROUGHLY A YEAR!? Don't... you do not DO THAT. Like, I GET that this is supposed to be some kind of "can't you see how much she cares for him and understands him!?" moment by implying she's the only one who knows him that well... while ignoring how he tends to keep people at arm's length and she only "knows him so well" by the fact that she apparently is the only one in the class with EYES or who bothers to talk to him when he's visibly upset, not even his best friend Nino. FUCK THIS SHIT. It's crap like THIS that makes me hate the Love Square SO FUCKING MUCH!! It takes what COULD BE a fairly decent execution of realizing one's feelings... and butchers it both by how it shoves it down the viewers throat by people commenting on it basically every episode AND the numerous writing flops in trying to shove them together as a couple. I have seen better romance from kids taking a pair of dolls and smashing their faces together. 

Like, this entire round of dialog is just Marinette rambling about her "feelings" because "OH EM GEE SHE LUVS ADREEAN!!!" Fuck this shit with a rusty spoon. Lemme guess, we're gonna see Socqueline devolve from fangirl (which could've AT LEAST set up something resembling interesting conflict between her and Marinette) into "rabid shipper." Garbage. 

Marinette... on what BASIS DO YOU HAVE ANYTHING IN COMMON WITH ADRIEN!? Beyond being generically nice people who like video games (which can apply to MOST OF YOUR FRIEND GROUP), the ONE THING you two had in common (fashion) turned out to be something Adrien doesn't actually want ANYTHING to do with!! 

And another round of mocking the Principal who loves superheroes. 

Okay, and we got Marinette getting fed up with Socqueline dodging the issue of her impersonating Ladybug and going on a rant of her own about trying to be a superhero "because it's very dangerous without magical powers" and I'm just sitting here like... Marinette, if this wasn't about being a superhero, that would be VERY FUCKING ABLEST SOUNDING. Heck, it's ablest sounding ANYWAY because it's implying that only people with the "right abilities" should be allowed to do a dangerous thing, even though IT IS THEIR OWN FUCKING CHOICE WHAT TO DO WITH THEIR LIVES!! Like, Socqueline impersonating Ladybug alone is annoying to me, not because it's wrong of her to want to emulate a hero she admires, but because she's apparently CLAIMING to be her when helping people, which actually IS a valid concern. But when the person delivering that valid concern talks like THIS?! Marinette... god fucking DAMMIT go see a fucking therapist. NOW. And we got a word of Socqueline sharing her "words of wisdom" from her and Marinette's up until now unknown shared past... "you've got to step in if you want to change things in life." Which isn't BAD in the slightest... until you remember that Marinette in Origins was a fucking doormat, so if Socqueline was supposedly such a big influence on her, why didn't she stand up to Chloe more!? They are trying to imply the two know one another so well... and it falls apart when you stare at it hard because of how little thought they put into meshing Socqueline's existence with the show's history! 

Also more of an angry rant by Marinette which is now pretty transparently about how much she hates being a Superhero. Like... Marinette, no one FORCED you to keep being one. It was literally a plot point in Origins that when she doubted herself, it was because she thought she wasn't CAPABLE, not because she hated the idea of it. So this entire angry rant is so much idiocy because it doesn't paint her as stepping up by doing what no one else is able to do, it paints her as someone complaining and being honestly a bit of a fucking control freak in that she's not thinking about what's best for the people she's thinking about what's best for HER by claiming no one can help her. This is almost NARCISSISTIC in how it is basically railroading the people of Paris into stepping back and leaving it all to the heroes, no matter how much of a burden it places on them, and it's all because of Marinette's personal feelings and stress. Okay, it's not LITERALLY that, given that the people of Paris are doing small things to try and keep from getting Akumatized, but for all that is good and decent in the world, WHY IS THIS SUCH A FUCKING BIG DEAL FOR MARINETTE!? It isn't even ABOUT Socqueline at this point, so you can't even claim that this is "anger born of worry." Why in the fucking world is someone who apparently hates being a hero so much and wants to leave it all behind still out in the field!? this is the kind of crap that results in permanent, life-long mental health problems. 

Oh, and now that we've moved on from that, we get a scene that APPARENTLY there's someone in Paris making Dinosaur/Pigeon hybrids. Given a later plot point in the season involving what the superheroes can and can't get involved with, this is gonna get stupid, I just know it. 

This is so idiotic. Just... it's completely idiotic because in this case, she ISN'T putting the safety of the people before her own feelings. If anything, she's doing the opposite, in that she's denying people the right to make their own choices for her own peace of mind. That's like expecting Superman to try and talk Lois Lane out of being a reporter, "because it's not safe for her to go and investigate dangerous criminals and organizations." 

And now we get Damocles getting mopey about whether or not he's an effective hero... and Socqueline, rather than encourage him to try and keep going on, and help because he wants to help, tries to encourage him to "keep being an excellent principal." Which, given that her argument basically involved people having the right to help out however they desire, it just feels like kicking Damocles while he's down (and he's just plain NOT a good Principal honestly). Yeah, we're seeing him get akumatized this episode. 

Marinette accidentally turns on the step tracker in front of Socqueline RIGHT after getting back from a big fight as Ladybug... and Socqueline just dismisses it as a bug. Which, yeah, I honestly buy... and makes a later bit of stupidity coming up more obnoxious to me. 

And here's the stupidity: namely, Gabriel gets an alert on HIS Alliance Ring regarding the superhuman data Marinette ended up inputting in Socqueline's Alliance... I-I gotta ask, why the absolute FUCK is he not questioning why he's only NOW getting word on this!? Or rather, why is he not QUESTIONING why he's only getting this data now!? Like, given he's apparently got those things linked together and is spying on the data they input to search for Ladybug, it shouldn't be too hard for him to check out Socqueline and figure out that she's had her Alliance for longer than just TODAY, so how in the world has he not gotten this info before now!? Because let's face it, Socqueline is the most OBNOXIOUSLY OBVIOUS in-universe red herring you can HAVE for a case of mistaken identity. Has won awards for gymnastics several years running? Check. Takes Tae Kwon Do classes? Check. Used to go to Francois Dupont, where multiple students have been Akumatized? Check. Has her hair in pigtails!? Fucking CHECK. Plus the incredibly "heroic" personality and mindset. It's CRINGE INDUCING how obvious of a suspect they made her... and the fact that she's NOT Ladybug, but won't actually admit as such when cosplaying AS Ladybug IS NOT HELPING. 

Okay... I GET that Dark Owl (or Darker Owl this time I guess) is meant to be a Silver-Age Batman/Adam West Batman Parody, but seriously, FALLING INTO A CAN OF PAINT IS THE BEST THEY COULD COME UP WITH!? This is just... what made Dark Owl effective in the first place was that he was VERY genre savvy regarding Superheroes and much more clever with his plans than he let on. So this?! Yeah, they are making him an absolute JOKE in the worst way possible. It's honestly a bit cruel. 

They aren't just recycling a plot, they are DOWNGRADING the plot. 

And now we move onto the fucking SHARED DREAM. You want to know the dumbest part of this bit?? It's the fact that we are given ZERO CLUE whose dream occupies which parts, or even WHY THEY ARE SHARING THE DREAM IN THE FIRST PLACE. The dream overall is just so ridiculously contrived it's basically running on the same campy Silver Age tones as Dark/er Owl does, and it makes any potential emotions regarding this just... fizzle away because how the FUCK do their respective dreams create a set-up where defeating Monarch is as finding his address, punching him, going to a movie together, and then winding up married... and how in the FUCK do they somehow NEVER NOTICE ANYTHING WRONG WITH THE FACT THAT THEY AREN'T DETRANSFORMING!? And... the babies. 

EVERYTHING about the babies is weird, and creepy. HOW DID IT TAKE THEM SO LONG IN THE DREAM TO REALIZE IT'S A DREAM!? WHY DID IT TAKE THEM THAT LONG!? It's... completely and utterly obnoxious. 

And what makes it more annoying is that they are trying to frame this as them losing this idealistic life... that they haven't put ANY EFFORT into making believable or desirable. It's just weird, disjointed, and doesn't seem to have any kind of logic to it at all. Ironically, just like a real dream. 

It's like they were trying to rip-off Alan Moore's Superman run where Supes got put into an idealistic dream, and it just comes off more as a cheap parody of what that run, and adaptations of it, tried so hard to capture. Like, we are given NOTHING to go off of regarding what their "dream lives" are meant to be besides "together, and with four/five super creepy babies that don't age." 

And I GET that "oh, Adrien is just upset at having gotten his dream life and then learning it's all fake," But it runs into the huge fucking problem THAT HE IS DEALING WITH A SUPERVILLAIN BOOSTED WITH A POWER ALL ABOUT GIVING PEOPLE AN IDEALIZED DREAM, and as stated above, the "dream life" was so blatantly fake and low-quality that the reaction he's showing is just... no. He is not sympathetic in this, he is coming off as violently unstable over a cheap, loweffort fake life. And he tried. To Cataclysm. AN INNOCENT MAN OVER THIS. Does Thomas NOT REALIZED HOW UTTERLY FUCKED UP THIS IS!? And this is AFTER he apparently had a fucking breakdown over accidentally cataclysming Monarch BY ACCIDENT. Like, if having his emotions toyed with like that made him less sympathetic towards MONARCH, I would get it... but that is not the case. He is royally pissed off over a cringy fake life that was so transparently nonsensical and taking it out on a fellow victim of the terrorist looming over their heads. No. Get his head out of his ass, this is insane, and not in a good way. 

Okay... so Marinette refused the Alliance Ring because it almost revealed her to Socqueline. That... is completely and utterly stupid because SHE CAN JUST TAKE THE THING OFF IF SHE IS ABOUT TO TRANSFORM!! Even if it is a plot by Monarch, the fact that SHE DOES NOT KNOW THIS means that her reason for refusing it is idiotic and doesn't seem to have any solid basis for it beyond a very weak case of sentimentality or paranoia. I wonder when they'll reveal that Monarch can track people through the stupid things. 

And with that, this episode review is done. 

Wait, just found out that Chat and Ladybug have a discussion about the power of Jubilation... and it's transparently low-effort ship tease. I say "low effort" because it's pretty obvious that they aren't even TRYING to discuss it at all and are just setting it up as "Ladybug isn't honest about her FEELINGS!!" and it makes me cringe. NOW my review for this is done.

[bookshelfdreams]

Im sorry about this i need to rant. I thought things were getting better but Izzy stan Twitter is at it again with their whining, truth bending and self-victimising.

'Do you like OMFD but wish the queer disabled hero didnt die?' IZZY IS NOT THE HERO OF THIS SHOW!!!!! He is at best a reformed antagonist. What an insult to the other disabled characters, and what about the actual heroes of the show??

'We've been betrayed by straight man writing queer stories'. First of all, way to dismiss the other writers. Also, its not his fault you project your personal traumas and mental health on a fictional character on a show with death in the title.

'GB's ending is comphet (?????) because 'we only need eachother' and theyre breaking away from their queer community' ED HAS BEEN WANTING TO LEAVE PIRACY SINCE LAST SEASON!!! also, its progress that Stede was able to resist basic flattery. And David made it clear that they still have work to do. This one truly broke my brain.

Im just sick of all this. Izzy stans have been coddled for the past week, being told its ok to grieve, but theyve crossed multiple lines. I do wish some things had been more explicit in this finale, only because David overestimated the maturity and media literacy of some people.

Sorry for this but i needed to talk to people here. Its beyond annoyance at this point. Im angry and sick of petty crybabies actively working to poison what we've built.

Don't apologize, feel free to rant at me any time!

"The Blackbonnet ending is comphet" surely is A Take, let me add that to the It's Only Queer If It's Subtext Collection, also featuring such gems as

The Lupete marriage proposal/wedding was basically straight

Canon queer ships are boring and unimportant

Izzy has the only queer arc

Izzy is the only "convincingly" queer character

It's super interesting to see this develop. The massive victim/persecution complex of a certain subset of Izzy fans. The vitriol leveled against all other fans, and the show itself, because clearly, these people never liked ofmd in the first place. Never liked what it actually had to say and instead, invented subtext that was never there to look into instead. It's like watching the birth of a conspiracy theory under controlled conditions in a petry dish. You will see these people say with their whole chest the most unhinged bullshit imaginable and receive praise for it, but when you keep in mind that for months, they have discussed the show Izzy in their insular little echo chambers, most of their takes become a lot more understandable. There's robust internal logic, even though, due to the flawed premise, none of it makes any sense.

But it becomes understandable when we loop back around to the point that a lot of these people don't engage with the show on its own merit. They really treat it as if it were just another queerbaity (maybe not even that) mid-2010s thing, too afraid to do something different.

ofmd is not that! But when all you have is a hammer. And when you're surrounded by people who keep insisting that yes, obviously that problem is a nail. That one too. Nails are all that exist. yk.

But. And please know that I am holding your hands and speak as gently as I can when I say this.

But please don't get angry about this? If this whole drama genuinely upsets you, you might need to take a step back and remind yourself that it's just fandom. It's just some idiots somewhere enjoying the pirate show wrong. It's not that important. There's plenty of things that are worth your anger in the world right now. Everything is fucked. But this isn't one of them.

Like, for me, this is fun. I am a petty bitch, I love to gawk at bad takes, I love conspiracy theories, reading things like this tickles my brain in the best possible way. It's like reading through the Psiram wiki (which is also something I do for fun. Yes, I am aware there's something wrong with me). It's even better, because it's inconsequential. It doesn't have very real human misery attached to it.

Like, obviously i think it's fine to be opinionated about dumb bullshit on the internet, and while picking fights with people who don't agree with me isn't something I enjoy personally, some people do and there's nothing wrong with that either. As long as everyone involved is having fun.

But. You gotta keep your distance, you know? Don't get personally mad at people with bad opinions. Having wrong opinions about the pirate show isn't actually harmful. Fandom isn't activism.

[pommunist]

i hope i dont sound like i am immediately picking apart what you said because i basically agree with 99% of it i just wanted to add a couple of thoughts i had (this got so much longer than i intended i am so sorry)

I don’t like how he said to be mindful about the intentions of people who raised the question, because a lot of them had genuine concern about it being a possibility and this could have been a very serious and dangerous thing if it had been true.

i fully agree with what you said here - however i feel like the death threats/harassment he was getting kinda justifies what he was saying to an extent. in his position, i doubt he is looking at each and every account to figure out whether the individual was coming from a place of concern or was adding onto the harassment. i don't think outright dismissing things like this is a good idea so to speak, but to me it does make sense, from his pov, to tell people to be mindful. many of those people were coming from a place of concern, but i can see how some of it could have came off as less than such in addition to the threats he was getting even though they were mostly separate situations. if this hadn't been the case it would have rubbed me more in the wrong way, but i can understand why he would say it in this scenario even if its like :/.

however this is something i would encourage of everyone - he is not wrong to basically be saying check the source of where you are getting your information from. i would say 90% of the people talking about it were acting in good faith, but that is not always the case, and people acting in bad faith can still have good points that should be taken seriously. it is just something that i think everyone should take note of - in any situation everyone is going to have bias and if you're going to take someones words as fact you should recognize that. that goes for quackity's words too. he is obviously biased in one way in this situation which doesnt mean he is lying in every word he says, but take that into account when looking at what he says. same goes for the admins who speak out you know?

And great that he’s saying that there has been some restructuring made within the team, and hopefully these changes will only leave the studios with competent people who are good intentioned towards everyone involved. I won’t like though, I fail to see how asking for everyone’s feedback and taking it into account to make these changes wasn’t an option. Also the fact that this restructuring ended up causing them to massively letting go of all the twitter teams as well as some other admins is still an issue.

this is a double edged sword imo - im gonna take it in two parts. he says that the restructuring is good and full of people who are good intentioned, but there really is no way to know that? i am under the assumption that he thought the first set of people were good and they weren't, and im not saying we can't trust these people/his judgement, but there truly is no way to know until things progress. id like to trust that the new management is good, but im wary just because of everything and it is hard to put trust into the new managment without seeing anything come out of it. i know these things take time, but its hard to blindly trust that these guys are good when there is nothing to prove it.

on the twitter admins/other admins, as much as i do not agree with it, it does make sense. it sucks and i hate that it happened, but it was pretty clear that financially keeping the same amount of admins on the team wasn't going to work. removing the twitter admins seems like a logical choice (i loved what they did. i wish they weren't removed. but in the grand scheme of things it does make sense to let them go first because even if it sucks the life and some of the fun out of it, their jobs were not essential to keeping the server running) but the way it was gone about was so... not it. the way they were all informed of how they were fired was just not good. point blank not good. i dont know if there was a way to keep them on while being able to pay them, im inclined to believe at the moment he probably wasn't lying and there wasn't, but it doesnt change the fact that that situation was not handled well. they could have let them go with more communication to the situation. thats what bothers me the most.

Meanwhile people will discuss these topics that are so far removed from the main issue and focus less on what the admins went through.

THIS!!! i do understand why people have brought talks about lore and stuff into this conversation - it highlights what the admins went through using tangible examples lol, but part of me wishes they hadn't because exactly as you said. people focus on these issues and not the other ones! it happened at the start of this too, where people focus on the lore/story related problems (which isn't a wrong thing to point out) but in doing so kinda push away the other issues even if that isnt the intent. sharing these stories was not to complain about pushing x creators lore to the front and holding y creator's back but to highlight some of the conditions and i wish that didn't get misconstrued as much as i feel like it has.

Hey anon ! sorry if i took so long to answer but I’ve wanted to take the time to answer everyone of your point !

-I can also see where he was coming from, and I also don’t doubt that there were bad intentioned people in the lot (thinking of a particular group of people, i think you can guess who 🟩). It’s just that it paints people who have genuine criticism/concern as just being haters, and it’s not the first time he used the "things said by people with bad intentions" point so I’m kinda over it

-YES to everything you said about researching information !!!! Jumping to conclusions or blindly believing any piece of info you see is literally doing for harm than good for anyone involved, always always try to find sources source, fact check and look from an unbiased POV the things you see. Will never forget when the union released their first statement and I saw people either saying that they were a fake account trying to smear the reputation project or that quackity was going to jail, I was like « oh my, we are cooked » 😭

-Also agree with your next point, but as you said we don’t know who these people are (and I don’t necessarily think we should know btw), so we can only hope that they will be competent and caring people who will run the studio in accordance with the law and with better work ethics.

-On the twitter admins getting fired well first we can agree that the way it was done is fucked up. And I understand the difficulty of the financial aspect (to an extent, don’t ask me details about finance, idk shit about money numbers lmao), but it’s giving « Your work was very needed and appreciated while it was free, but now that we may have to pay you we can actually do without it, bye guys ». Especially ehhhh about it since multiple Twitter admins have expressed that getting paid wasn’t an issue, the working conditions were. Though to be fair idk exactly how volunteer work is regulated in every country the admins were from so this may have played a part in their firing.

-And finally yes, the distracting from what matters. Like fans can discuss whatever they want obviously, my argument is more about Q here, like dude are you really sure the main point of contention here is to debate whether or not you were overly interfering in other ccs lore ??? Don’t get me wrong, great that you’re saying it wasn’t the case but the main point of everything was missed by a mile.

Also don’t worry your ask didnt came across as you picking apart what I had said but even if it was, as long as you’re not rude i dont mind people coming to my askbox like « tumblr user pommunist you are wrong about everything and let me tell you why »

[mermaidsirennikita]

Any recs where the heroine where reviewers on GR are like “god I couldn’t stand her she was a bitch”?

I'm pretty selective about reading GR reviews (because they annoy me... so much) but I think these have those comments for sure:

Kiss of a Demon King by Kresley Cole. Always and forever The Example. And like, does Sabine deceive and sexually torture Rydstrom? Yes. But her behavior does not top Lothaire's, and Lothaire is like, one of the most popular heroes in the series. She's also like, very confident about her appearance, and spoiled, and I imagine that affects things.

Neomi from Dark Needs at Night's Edge gets shit from IAD fans too. She's one of my favorite heroines ever; I have to think that a lot of the hate comes from her being a massive flirt who loves sex and is actually motivated to get out of the house she's trapped, tbh. Like, oh no!!! A woman being mildly self-centered!

No Good Duke Goes Unpunished by Sarah MacLean. I personally find Mara sympathetic (she fucks up, don't get me wrong, but I get why everything that happened... happened). But she's definitely MacLean's most hated heroine, mostly because she makes controversial decisions.

Melanthe from Laura Kinsale's For My Lady's Heart gets a lot of shit from readers for being cold and unfeeling... And it's like lmao dude she was given to an old guy in marriage as an actual child and targeted by a predator since then. She's political as hell and put walls up emotionally because she is so hurt. But yeah sure, I guess she's just a bitch.

I've been thinking about this book a lot lately, but Priest by Sierra Simone. I see Poppy, the heroine, being dragged down as like "shallow"--and the vast majority of the book is from the hero's POV, so that might affect things. But if you pay any attention to Poppy at all, she's got an internal life that's just as complex as Tyler's in many ways. She's also very conventionally hot, unabashedly sexual (flirts shamelessly with a Catholic priest even before he reciprocates lol), and was a stripper and didn't feel all this natural shame over it. Poppy owning her sexuality is a huge issue for readers, imo.

Similarly, a lot of readers of New Camelot are very dismissive of Greer and try to paint her as two-dimensional and whiny... compared to her two male lovers, of course, who are so deep and MUST truly just love each other, not Greer... It's both misogyny and a discomfort with the fact that a poly romance is in fact about a polyamorous triad, lol. And what I love about Greer is that she is a little frosty and removed, but her vulnerability is really revealed when she's alone with Ash and/or Embry. Like Poppy, she's very naturally sexual (and submissive) and she's not ashamed of it; she's very carnal. And she's also like, so good about expressing her emotion through sex? (The "IS HER PUSSY SWEETER THAN MINE???" rant at Embry is one of my favorite "oh wow they are really doing this" moments in a romance novel.)

I see a lot of people hating on Olivia from Olivia and the Masked Duke by Grace Callaway. Again, it's less her being a bitch and more her being a young woman who loves sex. I see a lot of "Oh, how could she be turned on by seeing the man she's into fucking another woman (before he even knows Livvy is an option for him)". Idk, because it's hot? There is soooo much kink-shaming in certain subsets of romance readership, gotta say. If it's not perfectly vanilla, they don't see it as "loving" lol.

Lol everyone hates on basically everyone outside of Valentine, the more strait-laced of the two heroes, in Alexis Hall's Something Fabulous. I think it's honestly such bullshit--like, yeah Valentine is not a bad man, but he is very closed off and self-centered in the novel's beginning. Also, it's an Alexis Hall romcom, everything is heightened and that means he has to go throoough it. Bonny is another hero, not a heroine; but he is very femme-coded in a way a lot of heroes in m/m books aren't, and it doesn't miss me that his more "straight-coded" counterpart gets a break where he doesn't. People get very uncomfortable with a lot of queer heroes in m/m romances who don't present as super masculine, or as fetishized hypertwinks. Bonny is lovely and funny and frivolous and flamboyant but he's also kinda bratty and not at all simpering.

People either act like the heroine of Sherry Thomas's Private Arrangements is a total cunt or an innocent totally wronged by her evil husband. There is no middle ground. When I'd argue that a point of the book is... middle ground.

Most Scarlett Peckham heroines get shit from readers, but especially the heroine of The Rakess (sex positive lady who has a fling with a kind single father widower architect) and The Earl I Ruined (flighty gossip who ruins the life of uptight dom earl, then decides to try to fix it).

People haaaate the heroines of Ruby Dixon's Sworn to the Shadow God (crime: being a kind of ditzy gamer girl who doesn't adjust to a parallel universe easily) and Wed to the Wild God (crime: is practical when the hero is a hedonistic airhead who needs her to think for him).

What a Rogue Desires by Caroline Linden has a heroine who grew up poor and has become a conwoman. Naturally, when she cons the rakish hero who was a total dick in the previous book, she is totally evil, I guess.

Roxanne from Lush Money by Angelina M. Lopex. Oh shit, she does all the stuff billionaire heroes do... Horrible...

Lol Florence from The Prince of Broadway by Joanna Shupe gets so much shit because she wants to run a casino and doesn't want to have babies. She's a total anachronism, apparently, all women wanted to stay home and have babies in the Gilded Age, nobody wanted otherwise.

[girlboss-enthusiast]

Hiiiii I saw you answer a couple of asks from who are worried because they're starting to agree with radfems, and well, it's my case too (long ask ahead).

I have a lot of trans friends, and my partner is trans (nb), but trans women specifically are starting to really rub me the wrong way. I want to preface all this by saying that I believe in bodily autonomy for transness too (I think trans people should be able to get hrt and all the care they need, people should be able to do whatever they want with their bodies), and using someone's preferred pronouns isn't a big deal and makes them more comfortable. Like it's not in my interest to dismiss that or their struggles because they do face barriers rooted in misogyny or transphobia.

However. Holy shit trans women act like men about feminism and everything related to women's rights. I genuinely hate the current trend of prioritizing their opinion over cis women's in every conversation when, in my opinion, they do not have the experience to even speak from a woman's perspective. Most trans women I see have been out online and sometimes irl for like 3 years tops, do not pass, and have the gull to talk about how bad feminism is and how it excludes them and it genuinely blows my mind. We're worlds apart but I cannot comment on it without being called transphobic.

By the way being called transphobic as a woman is genuinely horrifying today. Like, trans women online have this hatred towards TERFs which is quite frankly just awful misogyny. If I'm seen as one they'll want to kill me. I hate to say this because I get it sounds like white people complaining about "everything being racist today" but genuinely everybody is so happy to call others TERFs now.

And somehow, despite men controlling the laws that oppress them, despite men killing them the most, despite queer women being most likely to accepting them across demographics, they hate women more than anything and with such intense vitriol it's nauseating. Rape threats and misogynistic insults are normalized and saying basic feminist takes is vilified.

I want so so so bad to not think all of this but it's been a trend in all my friend groups. Trans women applauding vaush's misogynistic jokes, taking the side of men and in general being so far removed from the female experience they can't possible empathize with the vast vast majority of women. I think they don't question themselves because people are bulk rejecting the concepts of sex based oppression and gendered socialization and of course they do. Of course it's very easy to reject it when you've always been treated as the default. Of course you wouldn't see it when it hasn't harmed you systemically. Jesus christ.

And I can't tell them any of this. I can't argue that their perspective on life is male, and it's because of that that some misogynistic oppression doesn't apply to them, not because it's fake. I just have to accept whatever they think and whatever they want to define me as. I have to shut up in my own groups and let them do the talking because I'm just a stupid cis woman. They think they're the most oppressed group on earth when most of them did not even experience this most of their lives and it's so frustrating to deal with. They kept the confidence and mansplaining but now they're a protected identity so nobody can call this shit out. This is always used as like a way to make fun of radfems but yeah, fields like medicine not saying women anymore is a massive step back, women's health is already so fragile and understudied and now people have even more of a reason to not give a fuck because it doesn't include trans women.

I think this has been building up inside of me for a while now. It is starting to come out because I keep seeing this pattern and I got called transphobic despite my best effort of either concealing all of this or being nice to them. I'm extremely scared of getting radicalized but I genuinely don't know what to do, and radblr has been the only space I can agree with recently. Queer communities online and irl are so full of misogyny I don't want to really be involved in them even as a queer woman. I genuinely do know nice individual trans women and all but it's always those who actually pass or have been identifying as trans for a long time which is not the majority of them online at all. Sorry for being super long and kinda venty but yeah have a nice day!!

ANON I'M SORRY FOR NOT ANSWERING SOONER!! This has been in my ask box for ages but I forgot about it until now.

Your exact situation seems to be a major reason why many women (esp lesbians) find radical feminism in the first place—probably half the radfems I know ended up on radblr bc of this. It requires a lot of cognitive dissonance to have experiences like this with trans women but still believe TWAW.

As for your fear of getting radicalized—I know exactly where you're coming from. I worried about the same thing. But you don't automatically get radicalized because you agree with some posts, you know? Read/watch widely. Consider your feelings/opinions about various radfems stances and how they contrast with what you've believed in the past (or how they are similar!). Be thoughtful and trust your judgement.

Regardless of your eventual conclusions, you'll be more knowledgeable on feminist topics and better able to articulate your points, which is always a plus.

Good luck, anon! I hope you find some comfort and/or answers soon. Feel free to send another ask, I'll do my best to answer it on time :)

[cheryawa]

This is a personal post, so if it doesn't resonate for you, move along.

Manifesting for me has inadvertently and unwillingly had me access my own sense of self worth.

All these people you see push and push that their belief is the only way, the right way, and you have to do this and this or you're lazy and pathetic or whatever the fuck else.

It's so exhausting for someone with weak boundaries, no different from toxic self help culture. Always leveling up. Always trying to be enough, but also not too much. Trying to reach certain standards. Keep my thoughts in check. Don't beat myself up but also beat myself up for being "too negative." Beat myself up for wanting support and validation because apparently I'm not supposed to want that.

Never letting myself actually be me. I manifested so many things when I was younger, then everything basically stopped when I found out about all these rules and things people push. I was never doing it right in their eyes, and I kept trying so hard to be right, and just when I thought I'd let go of it all and figured out what I really want and believe, a new wave of people would come in pushing their new beliefs, and I'd spiral again into thinking I had to do more and be more, never an actual end goal in sight. I'd never be enough because I wasn't that kind of person.

I don't think you understand how much the "tough love" mindset pisses me off. I genuinely believe it's primarily people with power issues who prey on vulnerable people who need help to get that desired power trip. Maybe a few people out there are genuine, but tough love still isn't for me and never will be.

I've spent my whole life being nothing but insulted, dismissed, invalidated, yelled at. Yet I'm supposed to be motivated by people insulting me and telling me my problems don't matter? No.

I don't think you understand how this is an abuse tactic. "I'm only hurting you for your benefit in the long run." Then being insulted and invalidated if you say how you don't like the treatment. You're just weak and too sensitive if you don't like it.

The exact same abuse I experienced throughout my childhood, and even now as an adult.

I hate tough love. End of story. I don't have to explain myself to anyone or justify why I don't like it.

I'd see all these confident, domineering people and feel overwhelmed by them. How am I supposed to stand up to someone who's like a hurricane? Constantly going through rage after rage, feeling my boundaries trampled as people forced their beliefs onto me. I didn't know what I believed, just that I hated what everyone else was pushing on me.

I didn't have that sense of self worth, yet I was expected to force it through half-assed affirmations or I was weak and "not trying hard enough."

But maybe I don't want to feel hot. Maybe I want warmth and affection and for someone else to give me compliments. Yet this was demonized as "wrong" and "seeking validation from the 3D."

I think the manifestation community (as well as the self help community) has a massive problem with hyper-independence. A fear of vulnerability that creates this need to always be the one who's there for the self, an assumption that no one will be there for you, so you must be there for yourself.

But my whole life, I've always been there for myself. I was always alone. Always strong for myself. Even if I cried and showed vulnerability and hurt and hurt and hurt, I had no choice but to be strong. Always. Lack of vulnerability is the opposite of strength. It's fear, avoidance aligned in a way that gives the illusion of strength.

Everyone told me I had to be strong (as if I wasn't already), had to be okay with being alone (as if I haven't always been alone), had to be there for myself (as if I wasn't always there for myself). But I don't want any of those things.

I want warmth and love and affection and care. I want validation. I want to be understood in how I feel and think. I want to stop being the only one who cares about me. I want to be treated the way I deserved but never got. I want to be tended to at my worst. I want to be comforted and loved through all of the trauma I experienced. I want the freedom to be insecure and still be loved. I want to hurt and be loved. I want to make mistakes and be loved. I want to be listened to, for someone to care about me enough to tend to my wounds as I've always had to on my own.

My self love isn't cutesy handwritten notes or fancy bubble baths or affirming that I'm hot shit. My self love is my rage when people tell me I shouldn't want what I want, or how it's unrealistic, or how it's "weak" or whatever else. My anger is me loving myself enough to know something is wrong.

I was always putting others above myself because I didn't trust myself. Domineering people confuse me so easily. Years of gaslighting created a lack of self trust. How do I trust myself if nobody else agrees? I want someone to agree, but everyone says that's wrong, too, and I have to be there for myself. But I need help, but they say needing help is weakness.

After so much rage and dissociation from that rage, isolation from people not liking my defiance and anger, I had to acknowledge it. That anger was telling me all along that I have inherent worth. There is no standard to meet. I am worthy of everything I desire as I am now. I don't have to be stronger, or kinder, or meaner, or less sensitive, or more "disciplined," or more positive, or more carefree, or more rigid, or anything else.

There is nobody to be but me. I am enough as I am. I desire what I desire because I deserve it. I could not desire what I'm not meant to have. If I'm triggered and need to feel "bad," to have "bad" thoughts, I'm allowed to. It will not mess up my manifestations. Why should God have to force himself to think "good" thoughts to get what he wants? Why should God not let himself feel whatever he needs in the moment, or think whatever he needs in the moment? Why should God not inherently have and be worthy of his desires? It's nonsensical.

So now, I still struggle with letting myself feel anger without dissociation due to the intensity of my rage, but I know my anger is me wanting better. My anger is my love and I'm allowed to feel it. I'm allowed to not like it when people make me feel bad, and if they make excuses for how it's actually okay, it's not my problem. I'm allowed to dislike current circumstances. I'm allowed to want things to be different.

When I was younger, simply wanting something made it manifest. There's no reason that wouldn't work now. I don't care who says wanting is wrong or proof you don't have your desires. That has never been true for me.

To want is to love. To be angry is to love. To cry about current conditions is to love, knowing I want and deserve better. No matter who I'm being or what I'm doing. There's nothing I could do to be unworthy of my desires. There's nothing I have to do to get my desires if they're already mine. If I weep about how things are now, that doesn't suddenly make my desires not desire me.

And that is my rambling story of what I was forcibly ripped into and had to learn. I don't care who says what or who goes and repeats whatever someone else said, no matter how hard they push it as fact. This is my path and nobody else can interfere with it. I have learned so much personally and that means so much more than following along with whatever someone else is saying.

I will have all of my desires no matter what. I am worthy of them as I am now with nothing to change about myself. There is no self to change to be good enough for them. I never wasn't good enough. Society is going to keep saying to work harder to earn things and be enough, and I will keep refusing to play the game.

[mimjandoodlesstuff]

Man, you are so much kinder and more forgiving than I am, but you’re right about everything here.

To turn personal for a moment,

But diagnoses are so weird. It took me years of people having no idea what’s wrong with me when doing generalised checkups (I’m pretty sure one doctor even kind of dismissed me in a way) until mom and I agreed that something is definitely wrong when I wouldn’t stop rubbing where it hurts. It took me one interview and one checkup for a gyno to diagnose me with (vulvar) vestibulitis and another to expand it to generalised vulvodynia. It was so nice to finally have a name for it after so many years of hurting (even if the true realisation that chronic means forever hit me like nothing else had done before), but the fact that it took me basically half a lifetime of pain to figure this out angers me. But I live and can survive.

To derail the iteration somewhat, but I plan for my version of Raph to acquire some pretty bad shell damage after Rocksteady is… very unkind to him, if we put it like that. I see Raph as the type of person to push past the agony no matter what, and to bypass the healing time issue I want to have freak of nature science genius Donatello Hamato do reconstructive surgery on him, but he’s still left with considerable nerve damage. Even if I in my heart of hearts know that Raph will push himself Edward-Elric-post-prosthetic-limb-operation-recovery style, I don’t want to pretend Raph doesn’t suffer and cry over the pain and chronic nature of it, because implying he doesn’t is doing not only every other disabled person but also myself a massive disservice. Even the strongest among us can’t handle the pain (especially during flare up periods), and that’s ok.

for fusions: are you planning on keeping Leos knee injury as an in his head thing?

GOD no, I'm doing RIGHT by that boy.

I'm someone who has chronic pain and I HAVE ARTHRITIS IN ONE OF MY KNEES, I know knee pain !!! YOU CAN'T JUST CASUALLY BREAK YOUR LEG IN THE SAME PLACES LIKE 3 TIMES AND JUST "GET OVER" IT???

I. Hated. The farmhouse arc. Mostly because it made this huge deal out of Leo pushing himself hard, pushing himself TOO hard, breaking his leg again he pushed himself so hard, and then the show goes "actually he wasn't pushing HARD ENOUGH". Like. That's not how fucking structural problems in your body works. It should've been handled in a way that isn't aBLEIST AS SHIT.

They should have either a) made it obvious that Leo was favoring his leg out of fear or anxiety and not actual, physical issues his leg was still having, or b) make the story about him learning to actually rest. Learning to rest, to stop doing things, to stop trying, is such a fucking hard thing to learn. It's harder than trying because when you're trying, it feels like you're doing something.

When you just have to lay there, and rest, and wait, it feels like you're doing nothing, and society likes to make it seem like you're a bad person for doing nothing. Most people don't know how to rest properly, and I thoroughly believe the narrative would have been MUCH more interesting if they had pushed the idea that Leo was working himself too hard, he was pushing too much, and he would just keep hurting himself if he didn't properly heal first.

Instead they just went "haha pain is all your head and you can work past it :) "

You cannot.

Sometimes pain is just fucking pain, and sometimes it never goes away, and you have to learn to survive with that pain. You can't work past it, you can't wish it away as much as you want to, you can't just push yourself because it gets worse. You just have to breathe, and lay there, and rest.

It's such a fucking hard thing to do.

[f10werfae]

Sugar Baby Love

Pairing: CEO!Rich!Chris Evans x !Reader

Summary: Finally getting their relationship sorted out leads to a hot night filled with passionate lovemaking, !Dad!Chris at the end?! Major family man vibes xoxo !Fluffy smut!

Disclaimer: This story is fiction and should not be taken literally, the behaviour is simply imaginative and the content may be inappropriate

Possible continuation: Just like Daddy

Warnings: Spit play, mentions of anal, fingering, clit stimulation, obviously sex, oral, spanking (slightly), a tiny argument but that’s it

- Requests are open!

Likes, Comments and Re-blogs are appreciated♥️

Full Masterlist🌟

Chris Evans Masterlist✨

Taglist Form💫

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

(Y/n's P.O.V)

You could say Chris and I's relationship dynamic was a bit of a weird one. It all started when he saw me as an intern at his company under his assistant, if you asked me I thought he absolutely hated my guts. Then within months he had asked me to work under him, basically as his secretary, although one he would eat lunch with and sleep with? Slowly but surely it turned into a relationship where he’d spoil the crap out of me, as long as I spent personal time with him. Call it a sugar baby relationship? I’m not sure.

The help was definitely welcomed considering I was still at the ripe age of 25, and to have this 35 year old giving me a house and everything I needed? I was not one to complain about that.

With him I get what I want, when I want.

“Come on baby, tell your king what you want” He cooed, stroking my cheek with his thumb, his other hand focused on parking his car into his driveway.

“You picked me up too early from the party, I was still enjoyin myself” I pouted fiddling with the hem of my baby blue mini dress, hearing him sigh before unbuckling his seat belt. “you know the rules princess, i’m yours and you’re mine. Safe to say you were not actin like it, now were you?” He said in a knowing tone, bending over to my side, his lips inches away from mine as I shook my head no.

“And what do you have to say for yourself?” He said leaning back, flicking his wrist to fix the massive watch on his wrist, acting dismissively. “M'sorry” I murmured knowing damn well I was in the wrong, tears brimming my eyes know I had hurt his feelings. He had done so much for me and I couldn’t even respect his one wish, it was one dance with one guy I had dated before.

“I know you are baby, it’s okay I forgive ya. I know you love me dearly” He chuckled, leaning down to place a precious kiss onto my cheek, his hand caressing my thigh affectionately. “You love me yeah? Don’t you gorgeous girl?” He coaxed, nuzzling his nose against my neck, his tongue licking a strip up to my ear.

“mm I do love you Chris, I promise” I whimpered, his hands dipping up my skirt and fiddling with the thin middle section of my thong, his fingers basically playing with my folds.

“Good cause you know I love you even more hun” He breathed out, sitting upright, and while pulling his fingers out from under my skirt he pulled the elastic along with him. Letting the thong slap back onto my swollen clit, a jolt passing through my body causing him to hum deeply. “Get out of the car, and wait for me inside babe” He commanded suddenly serious, I knew what this meant.

Not questioning him I rushed out of his car and opened his front door with the spare key I had. Kneeling down I waited and within seconds a big golden fluffy dog hoisted itself into my arms, giving me kisses and licks all over my face.

“Oh Dodger boy I missed you, my tiny baby” I cooed massaging both his hears, when I heard those same dress shoes clicking on the floor behind me. Chris stood in front of me, his hand offered out for me to hold to get up. I gingerly took his hand, his fingers knitting perfectly with mine, bringing it up to his lips for a quick kiss he led us towards the staircase. Both of us waving a little goodbye to Dodger for the meantime.

“What are we doing Chrissy?” I asked quietly, lowkey freaked out by his unbroken silence as he pushed the door open and closed it with his foot. Lightly pushing me into our bedroom he took off his suit jacket, and headed straight into the bathroom where I saw him turn on the tap for the three person bathtub we had set up so we could relax together. These past 9 months, I guess you could say we got accustomed to living together, even if our relationship had no labels on it.

“Do you really wanna be with me Y/n?” He questioned facing away from me, unbuckling his belt and shimmying off his work trousers.

“Of course I do, what kinda question is that?”

“Do you see yourself with me, married” He questioned stopping his actions, his arms swinging loosely by his side.

“Yes”

I answered confidently, knowing I would never let this man go, doesn’t matter how hard he tries to shrug me off. He is mine and I am his.

“Ok good, because I can only see myself marrying you. I love you” I heard him say, his voice now shakier than before.

“Ya promise?” I teased, copying his words from earlier, watching as he turned around and told me off with the raise of an eyebrow instantly making me shut up.

“You wanna join me for a bath?” He quirked, his hands already pulling up the hem of my dress over my head, not even waiting to know my answer because he already knew it as a yes.

Letting me undo his tie and unbutton his shirt, we walked towards the bathroom with him getting in first so I could lay against him. “Do you actually love me?” I asked, my head against the sound of his beating heart, awaiting his answer I softly stroked his happy trail down his stomach which slowly led to under the water.

“At the start of us, I didn’t know what we were but I never expected any of this. No doubt I was convinced i’d be confined to just sexual relationships for life, but you changed it Y/n. I fell so hard within the first few weeks, that these past 8 months have been complete torture not being able to officially call you mine. I know you don’t want me for money, you treat me like a human being, you love and care for me even when you don’t need to” He said softly, his finger absentmindedly trailing up and down my arm slowly.

“What about you, do ya actually love this old man?” He joked.

“Shut up you’re not old. I am in love with you Chris Evans and even if I wanted to stop loving you, my heart wouldn’t allow it. It belongs to you now, so don’t you dare break it” I threatened feeling his chuckle vibrate through his chest beneath me.

“I wouldn’t even dream of it sweet girl” He said now a whisper, our comfortable silence accompanied by the sound of the water breaking.

His hand went under the water, shadowing around the area of my thighs before I felt his finger on my clit. Rubbing slow circles, I felt him leave hot open mouthed kisses onto my shoulder, small mewls leaving my mouth the harsher he went.

“You sound so cute princess, all for me to see and hear yeah?”

Nodding my head slowly I felt his fingers separate my folds and spreading them apart, one of his fingers now entering my wet cavern. His palm now taking over the duty of stimulating my red swollen clit, my body jerking under the water as he held me flushed against his body.

“Jus relax doll, i’m here to take care of ya, all jus for you” His voice sounding sexy as hell, he thrusted his fingers in and out of my hole rapidly, his palm wasting no time at rubbing my clit with no abandon.

“Chris baby, I-I think i’m gonna”

“Let loose baby, let it all out for me baby” He whispered right against the shell of my ear, his teeth gritted together as he went even faster on my lower half, screams erupting me as I came

“f-f- FUCK” I exclaimed feeling my legs shake and go numb after that orgasm, Chris' fingers now giving my clit slow circles to let me ride out my high. “You did so good for me baby” He cooed his arms now wrapped around my torso holding me up against his wet body. Tilting my head to the side his lips melted onto mine, his fingers now teasing my hardened nipples.

“Let’s get into some clothes babe” He whispered parting from my lips, picking me up with him and out of the bath.

(In the Bedroom)

I watched as Chris got settled into bed in his birthday suit, something we did after some hot steamy sex, he always claimed he wanted to feel me even closer. Not feeling satisfied enough after tonight I was at the foot of the bed and decided to dive under the blanket and crawl up towards him.

“What are you doing you little minx” He laughed peeking at me from above the blanket, watching closely as I took his cock in my hands and spit on it. Giving his red bulbous head a passionate kiss before taking him whole in my mouth. Feeling each of his veins under my tongue as I took him as deep as I could, his arms flipping the blanket, down putting us both out in the open.

“Fahk I love your mouth babe, making your man feel all good, you love doin that dont ya?” He growled grabbing my hair into a makeshift pony as I moaned on his cock as a reply to his statement. Pulling away from his cock I took his balls into my mouth, jerking his cock off with my hand as I licked and kissed them. His mouth sending out deep breaths and curses as if they were money bills.

“Fuck baby you still want that Birkin bag? I’ll get you whatever the fuck you want after this”

Feeling his cock twitch in my hands, I immediately sat up to squat over his cock, his hands going to hold onto my ass cheeks. Both of us moaning out when I lowered myself onto his cock, his balls bottoming out into me, his pubic hair scratching onto my sensitive clit.

“Go on babe, bounce on my cock like you always do, like the slut you are” He moaned out gripping onto my hips to help me move at a steady rhythm, his head moving up to suckle onto one of my nipples. His tongue moving rapidly around the sensitive bud as I bounced helplessly up and down.

“Fuck baby, I love your dick” I moaned out uncontrollably, with both the stimulation on my clit and nipples I felt pure ecstasy rippling through my body, spanks being sent consistently to my ass.

“Baby you’re so sexy God I can’t believe you’re all mine”

“Well you best believe it babe, cause this is all yours to have whenever you want” I moaned out again, squealing when I felt him turn me over so I was now underneath him. This man’s strength is unbelievable. Not even giving me a second to breathe he started pummel driving his cock into me, his head dipping down

“Stick out your fucking tongue” Looking at him confused I stuck out my tongue shyly, watching his eyes cloud with lust. He took my tongue into his mouth sucking on it wildly, his spit dribbled into my mouth due to his assault on my tongue.

“God you taste divine, now play with your wet clit while I fuck you” He growled, my hand going onto my clit rubbing in different directions, my swollen pussy burning in the best way possible.

His balls slapping my ass every time he thrusted into me. “Maybe I should play with your ass next time, you’d love that wouldn’t you?” He teased as I nodded, his finger rubbing over my asshole before returning back to my clit.

“Look at this baby, this is all ours” He said grabbing my chin to make me look down, a string of cum connecting both of our centres where we meet, due to how wet we had both gotten. “You’re so dirty Chris” I whimpered out, his hand holding onto my wrist to circle my clit faster, my teeth biting hard into my bottom lip.

“Want me to spit on you babe? like the whore you are, wan' me to make you all nice n' wet?”

“Mhm yes please” I whimpered out, nodding enthusiastically as I held my tongue out once again, his spit flying into my mouth and lips. Bringing his head down he pushed his tongue into my mouth and explored my mouth rapidly. His tongue darting along with mine trying to taste every inch of me,

“I love you so much” He moaned out into the kiss interlacing our hands together by my head, his cum spilling into me as I came with him. My legs buckling around his waist as I pulled him closer to me, his face hidden in my neck, both of us breathing deeply.

“I love you too babe, so much” I whispered bringing him for one last kiss, before he turned to the side and brought me up against him.

“That was amazing Chrissy” I whispered looking up to see his flushed red face, his eyes closed.

“You okay hun?” I asked sitting up to check on him,

“i’m doing amazingly baby, with you by my side. Jus never let me go please” He whispered his face leaning against mine,

“I would never Chris. Never”

(5 Years later)

(Chris' P.O.V)

“Papa can I ask you something?” I heard my four year old ask shyly, her pink unicorn pyjamas still dragging over body because they were too bit. But hey she wanted them.

“Mhm what is it sweet-pea” I asked bringing her onto my lap, closing my work laptop and letting her cuddle into my chest.

“Can I have money?” She asked chirpily, her ponytail bouncing away crazily, her big blue eyes she got from me looking absolutely adorable.

“Money for what?”

“Me n mama wanna go buy toys for Zizi” She replied cutely, talking about herself in third person, Zizi was short for Zamira a beautiful name we had found out about while on vacation that just stuck with us.

“Yeah you tell him baby” I heard my lovely wife say walking into the room, her beautiful silk robe clad body immediately catching my attention this early in the morning. She immediately took residence on my lap as she took Zamira into her arms.

“What typa toys you gonna get baby?”

“uhh Unicorns n barbies n mama wants a bubkin”

“that was our secret zizi!” Y/n said shushing Zamira jokingly, watching as Zamira gasped covering her mouth cutely. “Well if you wanted a birkin gorgeous , all you had to do was ask” I said hugging them both close to my body, placing a quick but passionate kiss onto my wife’s head, smiling as I felt her body relax into me.

“Okay here y’all go now shoo” I said giving her a batch of hundred dollar bills from my wallet, before I felt Zizi run off with my wallet

“GO ZIZI GET IN THE CAR, WE'LL GET CHANGED IN THERE” I heard Y/n shout running behind Zamira with my money in tow, Zizi running as fast as her little feet would take her, “IM GOING MAMA”

“AT LEAST BUY ME SUMTHIN BABE”

“I GOTCHU BABE” I heard her shout already walking out the front door, making me shake my head while smiling to myself. This is my dream.

————

Taglist Tags (Form is up there^^): @mrspeacem1nusone @thereisa8ella @seren-a-ity @patzammit @pandaxnienke

[sterecs-sterek-fic-recs]

Sterek Valentine’s Fic Recs

Happy Valentine’s Day for tomorrow, everyone ♥ We couldn’t not post a rec list today with this theme! A lot of us love mushy, cutesy declarations of love, but listed below is a mixed bag of both that, and more angsty Valentine’s fics, if you’re not so into tooth-rotting fluff.

Happy Reading!!

-Mods @thisgirlsays22 & @snarkatthemoon​

♥ Valentine's Day Candy in Aisle Four | linksofmemories_archive | E | 9k

“It’s so commercialist, and all it does is bring people down who don’t have a special someone.”

“Basically.”

“Are you two seriously discussing your hatred of Valentine’s Day when a man with a gun is walking around the store?”

♥ Love Is Blind And So Is Stiles | clotpolesonly | G | 1.6k

Stiles is an idiot. Derek is in love with an idiot.

It’s not like he didn’t already know this. He’s spent too many years watching Stiles walk head first into glass doors because he’s too busy texting to look where he’s going to not be aware of how much of a moron this otherwise very intelligent person can be. But he would’ve liked to think that Stiles wasn’t completely blind.

He would’ve been wrong.

♥ Lucky That I'm Yours Every Day | stilinskisparkles | T | 6.7k

Derek doesn't see how Valentine's Day can get any better than a normal day with Stiles.

♥ The Curse of Saint Valentine | llassah | E | 12.8k

There are a few werewolves, largely dismissed as crocks by the general population, who claim that Valentine's Day has been commercialized by werewolves who have infiltrated the card publishing industry in order to give people an explanation for the intense increase in overblown futile romantic gestures at this time of year. Werewolves, on the second full moon of the year, are overcome with both an intense physical desire and the overwhelming urge to woo their chosen mate.

Derek Hale's struck down by the Curse of Saint Valentine. It's not all bad.

♥ always gonna be mine | elisela | T | 2.6k

“I hate to cut this short, but I have to get home,” he says apologetically, and Stiles is surprised to see it’s just after two in the morning when he checks his phone.

“I don’t think an eight hour date is short by anyone’s standards,” he says, glancing over at Derek and trying to read his reaction, but Derek’s face is too hidden in shadows. “Kinda crazy that we both grew up in Beacon Hills and it took moving to New York to meet you,” he says, slowing down when they get to the door of his building.

♥ Have a Heart | kyrene | E | 23k 

Spending his Valentine's Day on a stakeout and coming under threat of death by midnight... these are not Stiles' idea of how a holiday should go. Especially when it's Derek who's caught up in events with him. On the other hand, maybe things will work out all right in the end after all.

♥ I Hope Not | JoMouse | T | 6.8k

After everything they've fought, Stiles thought he'd seen it all. Until the night he stunned Cupid.

♥ Free Flowers, Fast Food | aurevell | G | 1.6k

Derek is hangry and dramatic (on the inside), there’s literally nothing to eat in his dorm room, and some weird kid on campus is handing out roses in the dark. And of course, it’s Valentine’s Day.

♥ Strawberry Shortcake (and Other Disasters) | aurevell | G | 5.6k (sequel to Free Flowers, Fast Food) 

Derek’s struggling with a massive paper, Stiles is on the evening shift, and their first anniversary is shaping up to be kind of a wash. And of course, it’s also Valentine’s day.

♥ I fell down on St. Valentine's Day | HalfFizzbin | T | 2.5k

According to legend, the historical St. Valentine was a 3rd-century priest who performed marriages for couples forbidden to wed under Roman Law.

According to another legend, Derek Hale is a die-hard romantic.

♥ Convenient | exclamation | E | 10.7k

Stiles knows what he is to Derek: convenient. He knows that Derek isn't looking for a relationship, just someone to have casual sex with. Which is why Stiles is so surprised to find Derek setting up a romantic dinner for Valentine's Day.

♥ Kiss Me Under the Light of a Thousand Stars | alisvolatpropiis | NR | 5.6k

“It was a true love spell,” he admits quietly. “It was supposed to help me find my true love. And apparently I suck at magic as much as I suck at dating because I screwed this up too.”

~~~

In which Stiles' Valentine's Day love spell goes very wrong.

Or perhaps very right.

♥ this is precious love | sterekhale | T | 1.9k 

Stiles rests their foreheads together as they slowly sway offbeat. The song builds up, singing about precious love, and it’s everything Derek doesn’t know how to say out loud.

After the song fades out, Stiles pulls back from Derek while pouting. “It’s too short,” Stiles says.

“Play it again.”

—

After four years together, Derek reflects on their relationship, Stiles makes a promise, and they slow dance in their kitchen.

♥ Hotsky to Trotsky | paintedrecs | T | 3.3k

Derek had his future mapped out: there'd be graduation, followed by college, followed by (he hoped) a good grad school, then a career as a professor whose students didn't spend their time flicking paper footballs at each other and obsessing over their dating lives. He had good friends, a good family, and no time to focus on distractions like high school gossip or relationships.

He hadn't factored Stiles Stilinski - lacrosse player, class clown, part of the popular crowd, currently spending his entire day staring at Derek and smiling - into his plans.