#based on a real conversation!

[ashenquill]

Dick, annoyed that he can’t figure out what’s wrong with his escrima’s taser: What do you WANT FROM ME

Jason, overhearing: Firstborn. And some Tostitos. Not necessarily in that order.

Tim, not looking up: Crazy Uber Eats order

Damian: Maybe living with Grandfather wasn’t so bad

[iodotsys]

never thought id draw jim carrey and his gay husband

[incorrect-batfam-quotes-mostly]

Tim: hey! I'd be an awesome goalie

Bruce: why?

Tim: because I don't have the self preservation instincts to be afraid of soccer balls flying at my face

Bruce:

Tim: im just saying

[theaceofarrows]

[Nightwing and Red Hood on a stake out outside a convenience store]

Nightwing: [watching the back] See anything yet?

Red Hood: [watching the front] A lady just bought $75 worth of cookies and two gallons of milk

Nightwing: Wow. Cookie Monster in disguise

Red Hood: Didn't know Cookie was a thirty something year old woman. Very good disguise

Nightwing: That's the point. He hides in plain sight

Red Hood: Sure, if you say so

[Half hour later]

Red Hood: Any changes from your side?

Nightwing: Other than me wanting a cookie? No

[that-bitch-kat3]

average conversation in the marauders dorm:

peter: there are two wolves inside of you: drinking and gambling

james: they’re making out

remus: actually i’m pretty sure moony is the only wolf inside me

sirius: same

peter: BAHAHAH

james: (in shock)

[metalcrows]

Some people: Why would you say Garak and Bashir like each other? I hate that people make Star Trek gay nowadays...

Average Garak and Bashir scene:

[riggsink]

@star-sparkler I humbly offer this comic of August, she is light itself and perfect in every way

[adhahyperfocusingonsomething]

Duke: “Why are French Fries called French Fries? They aren’t French.”

Jason: “Maybe your supposed to speak French when eating them”

Dick: “OR Maybe they are so hot, that when people eat them they go WEH WEH HOHN HON trying to cool their mouths.”

Duke:

Jason:

Jason: “That’s so ridiculous it’s almost funny.”

[evilgothmisandrist]

me: unwanted sex is rape

liberal: yeah okay

me: paid sex, buying consent, is rape

liberal: 🤔… 😠 ….

me: “sex work” is rape

liberal: 😡 HOW DARE YOU?!! ITS THEIR CHOICE !!! WHY DO YOU HATE WOMEN!!???

[slowandsteddie]

Steve, has a seizure and passes out

Steve, wakes up in the hospital

Steve, immediately clocking the worry on Eddie’s face and unable to look away

Steve, forcing a smile: “sorry for being so dramatic. I was just bored and wanted out of the house.”

Eddie, making a choked sound

Eddie, glancing at Dustin who has very red eyes

Eddie: “you know you could have just asked me to take you on a drive.”

Steve, snorting: “we do that all the time. I wanted something different. This car made a cool noise.”

Dustin: “Seriously, Steve?”

Steve, pouting: “I just wanted to go in the wee-woo wagon.”

[r1ch13-tv]

[fun-k-boards]

I'm asexual

'But you can still like have sex right?'

I am fifteen. Why the fuck do you need to know.

[aesopsharpmybeloved]

In the Devil's Den

[aikya-kat-44]

Diomedes: wow, I wish I was as smart as you two

Penelope and Odysseus, in unison: NO YOU DON'T, YOU WOULD NEVER KNOW PEACE

[serotonin-dose]

almost had it, denji

[clumsypuppy]

id fumble him so bad