#average day in gotham city

[internetgiraffekid1673]

ThePandaRedd Appreciation Post: Bill and Ted

This is me screaming into the void that I think my two favorite characters in the comic scene are Ted and Bill from the Pandaverse (the comics universe created by ThePandaRedd's tiktok skits). I freaking love these two because they are hilarious and I gotta say it somewhere.

Consider this a ThePandaRedd appreciation post.

Bill is a very long running Pandaverse character and is a professional henchman in Gotham City. He has been henching long enough to see the formation of the goonion, have batman steal so many of his bones that they're kept ground up in a jar, see the rise and graduation of every robin, batgirl, or other, and become so tired that he can backtalk his most consistent employer---the Joker.

Bill is a jaded henchman, mostly in the job because it's the easiest way to get money in Gotham, and because he's kinda in too deep to quit now. He's one of the best advertisers the goonion has, strongly discourages other people from henching in Gotham, and has so many residual medical issues from getting brutally beaten up by the batfam that he just doesn't care anymore. While he is regularly employed by the Joker, he has also been seen working for the likes of Penguin, Black Mask, and Bane, presumably when the Joker is in Arkham. Most other characters treat him with some instinctive respect for having stayed in the Gotham henching game this long, and he could absolutely go toe to toe with Superman if not just easily secure some Kryptonite and whoop his ass. Fortunately for Superman, Bill sticks to the Gotham scene.

Ted, meanwhile, is a relatively new character, and he has recently moved to Gotham from Coast City (where the Green Lantern lives). Suffice it to say, he is not aware of all of Gotham's idiosyncrasies and is still learning the wheel. If Bill the henchman is to be believed, Ted dropped out of the high school they both attended and may or may not have moved to Gotham for ease of employment.

One of his first appearances was when he'd just joined the GCPD and was trying to covertly get some info on the villain scene by asking Bill about how to start a career in henching. While Bill did not discover that Ted was working for the GCPD, he also gave away pretty much no valuable information since he instead launched into a rant about why anybody would be so suicidal as to try to START henching in Gotham City. His most recent appearance has him presumably out of a job again and noting some of his findings about Gotham as a Coast City Transplant (batburger's overrated, gang territories are gerrymandered, Robins are scarier than Batman, you'll be gifted with a water filter a gas mask and a gun upon moving houses if you send advance notice, etc.)

So, why are these two gag characters from a comic book tik-tok creator my favorite comic book/comic adjacent characters? Because they do exactly what they are designed to and narrow in on the every day.

Comic Books are a sci-fi/fantasy genre that focus on impossible stuff happening, frequently at a pretty grand scale. And while it is super cool to read or hear about stuff like Batman and his adoption problem or Superman being a basically god while still being the most human ray of sunshine ever, that's not even close to my favorite stuff.

No, my favorite type of media to consume is the kind where we get a peek into the everyday of someone in a vastly different circumstance from ours, and feel just how normal they are. I find a lot of comfort and humor in recognizing that even in very unfamiliar circumstances, there will still be simple, everyday things that persist.

Bill might be a goon in a city with some of the most insane and terrifying vigilantes ever, working for some of the most insane and terrifying villains ever, and the city is explicitly a commentary on the general shittiness of urban environments like New York, but that's not what he cares about most of the time. Instead he's busy explaining why you shouldn't smoke to his fellow goons, or dealing with the fact that his employer won't keep a reliable schedule, or having a crisis that he regularly has to run away from a 12 year old dressed like a traffic light or else die trying, or trying to convince people to mask up during quarantine, or promoting that fellow goons "do bad shit safely." And I like to think that if I somehow ended up as an evil goon in someplace as nonsensical and dramatic as Gotham City, I might respond similar to Bill after a while. And that level of normalcy and sanity persisting in such a fantastical environment is both very funny and very comforting. Human nature will persist.

Ted is similar. Everybody who has experienced moving cities knows that it can be disorienting and confusing and even a little scary as you try to figure out how things work, but you'll figure it out regardless and probably have a fun(ish) time doing so. Ted shows that the same principle applies even when those differences get cranked up to 11 and include superpowered and/or impossibly determined and crazy people. He makes my own experience moving cities where I joke and complain about the differences feel validated and it's just so funny to see someone react so normally to such an abnormal situation.

Ted's experience is something that can actually he applied to my own life, like when I learned about Rural vs. Urban stupid zoning laws or trying fry sauce after moving to the mountain west and having to defend my stance that it is an abomination. So seeing someone like yourself doing the EXACT same thing in such an insane circumstance both strikes a chord of truth and makes me laugh myself to the floor.

I also really appreciate that the PandaVerse in general has connected lore for what is basically a gag series used to affectionately parody comics. Something about people actually caring about their jokes enough to make connected lore makes me so so happy.

So thank you ThePandaRedd for creating Ted and Bill, continuing along with them, and making me smile.

Seriously, all this was to say that ThePandaRedd is cool, you should go watch his stuff, and that Bill and Ted are hilarious.

[violent138]

There's maybe three reasons large swathes of the GCPD haven't resigned: 1) kickbacks from the Mob and other gangs help or they work in parts of the city that aren't entirely a lost cause, 2) they're psychopaths that enjoy the position, 3) they're hopeful near-lunatics like Gordon.

[centralcitizeningotham]

I FOUND MY CAT!!

Apparently, Robin took him when i was in my Intro to Criminal Justice class.

Because "he looked sad"

Nightwing made him return the stinky babie

I've decided that i am in love with the bat-family

[sophiethewitch1]

www has a playlist? Please where can I find it😭

This link here is the mini playlist which is condensed and has like songs that I 100% have a reason for having on there and most of the songs where explained if they didn't have extremeee spoilers over on and this link here. here is the full playlist which I use personally (which you can tell because it has 1601 listens to it insert that one war veteran staring into camera meme here) but some of the songs are only like slightly associated.

[sweetteaanddragons]

I have been thinking lately about a universe where Bruce Wayne killed the Joker.

I want to be clear here, since there are so many longstanding debates on this topic: I do not think Bruce Wayne should kill the Joker. I have just been wondering what would happen if the circumstances aligned in such a way that he did.

And to be clear on a related, yet slightly different topic: when I say I have been wondering about what if Bruce Wayne killed the Joker, I do not mean as the Batman. I mean Bruce "Brucie" Wayne.

Maybe it's kind of an accident? Like, he definitely did intend to hit the Joker, but he's Brucie right now, so he's trying not to look like he knows what he's doing while still doing enough damage to keep the Joker from killing someone, and meanwhile the Joker makes just the wrong move and -

And here we are. Brucie just killed the Joker.

Bruce's reaction here is one thing; he has his one rule for a reason, he's just broken it, he's determined to turn himself in -

His family's reaction is a whole different story. How does Cass feel about this?

How does Jason? Bruce has killed the Joker, just like he wanted, but it wasn't for him, not really, and -

And meanwhile, this happens in front of, say, a gala full of people, so now all of Gotham gets to react to it too.

Average Gothamite, seeing the words BRUCE WAYNE, JOKER, and KILLED in the same headline: OH, NO.

Average Gothamite, once they've processed the order those words are actually in: . . . I did not have that on this year's bingo card.

The city's most famous mass murderer has just been publicly killed by the city's biggest employer/philanthropist/source of tabloid harmless nonsense! Three days before Brucie was making tabloid headlines by tripping into a fountain and somehow losing his shirt in the process! Two weeks before, the newspaper was running a retrospective on the Wayne murders and what donation Brucie was making to help the families of victims this year! The article mentioned how one of his adopted sons had also tragically become a murder victim!

Now this has happened, and Bruce is having a breakdown over breaking his one rule, and the rest of Gotham just assumes that this is because poor Brucie thinks this somehow makes him like the man who killed his parents. They send a huge outpouring of support his way. This in no way helps Bruce's actual breakdown.

Ninety percent of Gotham is sure Brucie didn't actually mean to kill the Joker, and pretty much a hundred percent of them support him whether he meant to do it or not. No one wants to have anything to do with prosecuting this mess. Bruce is trying to make it as clear as possible that he will fully cooperate with the justice system and meanwhile an entire gala full of people is suddenly acting like they could in no way have possibly witnessed events that took place ten feet in front of their faces. Did Bruce kill the Joker? Is the officer sure? That doesn't seem like him. Maybe the Joker just tripped on his own. Marble floors, you know. Very slippery.

[stealingyourbones]

time to post the prompt I tormented @bloggerspam with on discord >:) Danny and Jason died at the same time and parts of their core jumped into each others cores, making them literal soulmates. They feel a burning tug deep in their chest ever since they got brought back to life, a desperate yearning, there’s some part of themselves that is missing. They feel hollow. After a bad coming out (as Phantom, not out of the closet) with his parents, Danny decides to follow that tugging sensation... all the way to Gotham City, where a certain crime lord also is yearning for something he can’t quite place. During the time Danny arrives in Gotham, the sense of yearning and hollowness strengthens in Jason. He doesn't know what's going on. His family is worried for him. Jason's new bedtime routine is gently rubbing a spot just to the right of his heart, silent tears running down his cheeks as he yearns for the touch of a person he's never met. It's confusing and frightening. All he knows is that the pain in his chest is now even stronger. The hollowness he's felt ever since he crawled his way out of his grave spreading past a sense of yearning and progressing to an agonizing longing. Jason tested himself for every type of Ivy's pollen and it came back negative. He doesn't know what's going on and he's scared. For Danny it's similar. The tug of his core is even stronger in Crime Alley. Every night he weeps holding his hands around his core feeling it softly cry for its other half. He knows they're nearby but he doesn't know how to pinpoint their location. All he can do is wait and hope that they stumble across each other. Danny decides to take action. He steals some of Vlad’s money and opens a coffee shop in the Narrows. Danny can feel the tugging so much stronger here. He hopes he can find what his core is looking for. Danny first meets this one extremely tired looking teen in a nice suit who always looks dead on his feet and asks for an ungodly amount of caffeine. Danny happily gives him the borderline toxic order. The man keeps on coming to his shop and they start to get to know each other. Unknowingly, Danny has become fast friends with a billionaire CEO. After multiple agonizing weeks, Tim brings his brother to the new shop that opened in his territory that sells incredibly good coffee for a concerningly low price... Danny is just working at his cafe on another average day when the door opens and in walks Tim and Him. A tall and built man with a white streak in his hair who's staring at Danny like he hung the stars in the sky.

The second their eyes locked,,, they felt whole. For the first time in years the yearning pain is no longer.

After meeting they realized a problem. It's genuinely agonizing being apart for more than a half an hour as their cores are finally healing from tearing themselves apart in their desperation to find their other half. This streamlines getting to know each other with the forced closeness. Tim helps Jason and takes over his patrols in Crime Alley as their cores mend. They found out that physical touch helps speed up the process greatly which meant the optimal way to speed up their cores healing was to sleep in the same bed.

During this time, both Danny and Jason's ghostly instincts are in overdrive. Danny and Jason both unknowingly are courting each other in a ghostly fashion and are unknowingly accepting the courting from each other, leading to an unintentional ghostly marriage (They aren't too freaked out about it when they figure out they're technically married according to Infinite Realms customs. It completes the mending of their cores after all.)

[rin-may-1103]

Biggest Regret. (Part Two)

Previous | Master Post | Next

Bruce had finally found a peaceful moment to sit down and go through his work emails; there were no sibling homicide fights, prank wars, and thankfully no vigilante-related headaches.

Just a peaceful afternoon; normal polluted Gotham skies, the usual city ruckus of honking horns and shouting, and the constant footsteps back and forth past his closed office door.

taking a sip from his old mug, Bruce opened his laptop. Quickly typing in his password for the hour, he made his way to his email. surprisingly, less than 90 emails were waiting for him. Usually, he had hundreds to go through.

hmmm. Another check for this being a suspiciously good day then, it just made him more anxious for when the other shoe would fall.

peaceful for Gotham, for him, never meant anything good. It always happened right before a tragic event or large-scale Arkham breakout. he could hope for it to just be a peaceful day, but he knew wishful thinking was useless.

taking another sip, Bruce started scrolling through his emails, reading the subject lines to sort through which ones were more important. After a few minutes of reading, Bruce stopped and reread the second to last email's title, his eyebrows furrowing:

A Video From Your Son.

Now, Bruce was truly confused; Why would one of his kids email him? let alone through his public work email? They've been told multiple times to email him through the bat-email if it contains anything important or time-sensitive. Heck, they've been told to just text him it if it was important, he always answers a text faster than an email.

His Bruce Wayne email was notoriously ignored for multiple days; mostly for his cover story, but also because he spends most of his time doing Batman stuff. (Reading Wayne Enterprises emails usually wasn't something at the top of his list, the kids know this.)

so, then why would one of them email him?

hmm. maybe? maybe one of the boys set up a long-term prank or something. They know how long it takes for him to read his emails, so maybe they sent it knowing it would take a while, which means they had plenty of time to set something up.

yes, that's it. it makes total sense.

Clicking on the email, he was greeted with a boy (who looked a lot like Damian, but who most certainly wasn't) sitting gravely on a wooden box in some dark warehouse.

sitting up straight, Bruce set his mug down and studied the paused video. the boy looked so much like Damian that Bruce almost wanted to believe he was a clone. but his bright stern blue eyes and and apparent freckles pushed the idea away.

Yes, clones can have imperfections, especially when made in a rush, but never something as drastic as the wrong eye color or a genetic quality the one being cloned didn't have. Unless, the one making the clone had no idea what they were doing, but Bruce doubted Talia would have allowed someone to take Damian's DNA before he was given to Bruce.

and the boy on screen had scars, lots of scars, meaning if he was a clone then he was made before Bruce even knew of Damian.

hmm.

there were no clues provided in the kid's surroundings; the warehouse was surprisingly empty of anything important or telling. the kid had even chosen a spot where Bruce couldn't tell if it was day or night, or if the lights were on. which took away the usual ways of figuring out where the boy was.

No sky meant he couldn't calculate the general area based on season and celestial bodies. And because he couldn't tell if the light was from industrial lighting or daylight, he couldn't cross out warehouses with electricity. The kid was smart. smarter than the average citizen at least.

he was also wearing discreet clothing; which meant Bruce couldn't trace him through that either.

leaning forward so he could rest his elbows on his knees, Bruce pressed play and gave the video his full attention.

The boy on screen sat in silence for a moment, seemingly gathering his thoughts. his hands rested in his lap, his poster rather relaxed as he sat on his wooden crate.

"This is video eight." the boy spoke, his voice rough with sleepless nights and yelling. Did he yell at people often? or had he gotten into a fight previously? there were seven other videos, but this was the first one Bruce saw. he'd have to go back and see if he had somehow missed them.

"don't worry, you didn't miss anything." the boy chuckled humorously, running one of his hands through his hair. Bruce noted that it shook, the kid was probably nervous, or hungry. the kid looked too skinny to be healthy...

"no, this is just the eighth time I've had to record this." the boy continued, dropping his hand back into his lap as he slumped forward, his black hair falling into his face.

"this video," he continued, not glancing up, "is for Bruce Wayne's eyes only."

there were still no visual tells on where the boy was, not even audio cues for Bruce to study. frowning, Bruce rested his head on his hands, taking in everything the boy said.

"Hi Dad," Bruce sucked in a breath, tensing up as the kid finally glanced back at the camera.

"I'm Danny. you likely don't know I exist, and if you're receiving this; I'm already dead." he chuckled like the thought of his death was laughable. "well, more dead than I already was." he snorted, shaking his head in a way that reminded Bruce of Damian when he was exasperated or disappointed.

"Maybe it's cruel of me to send you a message post-mortem," Danny, the kid's name is Danny, looked away. He rubbed his neck awkwardly as he continued, "But you deserve the truth, and telling you earlier would've put you in danger."

Danny let out a breath as he pulled his legs up onto the crate, "this email is set to automatically send if I haven't opened my laptop for three days. I sometimes set it longer if I'm expecting trouble or going to be away for a while, but I've most likely been away from home for a bit over three days if you're receiving this."

Danny looked so tired as he looked back at the camera, the dark bags under his eyes worse than even Tim's after a week-long investigation.

"I don't know who killed me. Obviously, I'm recording this in advance... I have my suspicions though. it was most likely either the GIW or my adoptive parents, the Fentons." Danny reached beside him and held up a two pictures, "This is Maddie and Jack Fenton, and this," another picture, "is some GIW agents."

Danny snorted as he glanced at the GIW agents, their startled faces slightly blurry as Danny stood in front of them and took a selfie. bruce wasn't sure if he was amused or not that the kid took a selfie with his potential murderers but then again, Bruce could see all of his children doing it too. (Bruce could also see himself doing it.)

"i half-died at 14," Danny suddenly added, tossing the pictures to the side. "became the local ghost superhero..."

he stared off to the side for a moment, "but they never realized I was trying to help and kept talking about tearing ghost me apart molecule by molecule." Danny glanced back at the camera before his eyes widened, "my parents! I mean, my parents and the GIW wanted to tear me apart, not the town! though they probably wouldn't have disagreed with it if asked..."

"anyway," Danny shook his head, "my money's on that being what happened..." Danny looked down at his hands like he was seeing them for the first time, "there will be nothing left of me to bury..."

"Sorry about that!" he suddenly added, a bright smile on his face. Bruce could tell it was strained, forced in hopes of not upsetting him.

"you'd probably have to cremate me if there was, it'd be a waste of wood to get me a coffin... though I'd really prefer if I wasn't set on fire," Danny chuckled, trying to hide a full-body shiver.

He sat in silence for a moment before Danny continued, "The rest of the story is this: I was raised in an assassin cult, eventually escaping at the age of nine. they sent me on a mission and I just had to take the opportunity. I successfully faked my death."

Danny sat up now, fully focusing on the camera, "My biggest regret is that I escaped alone. And that's the reason I'm reaching out to you."

Danny let his feet fall off the edge as he grabbed something from next to him, keeping it out of view for now. "you're a civilian," Danny stated like it was a fact he knew to be true.

Bruce clenched his jaw, trying to keep himself still so he could focus on what Danny was telling him. he wished he could reach through the screen and hold the boy, whether he was his son or not, he obviously was talking about the league which meant Talia hadn't told him.

Talia hadn't told him, and if he was anything like Damian, then he would have no reason to believe otherwise.

"If you know too much about the League of Assassins you'll be in danger, but I need you to save my twin Damian." Danny's words were like a final nail in the coffin, the final straw to keeping his heart from breaking again.

it was true, it had to be. How would Danny have this information otherwise?

"he's likely still there after all these years. he never wanted to escape; he took pride in being the heir to the league. he's probably going to be stabby: he's an assassin after all, but it's not his fault. Ra's, our grandfather, indoctrinated him a lot more successfully than he did me. Damian was more susceptible to it... it's not his fault." Danny repeated, clenching the object he had grabbed.

"Please," Danny pleaded, "save him. I'm begging you. My biggest regret is leaving Damian in the league. You have a chance to save him. Please, please take it."

Danny bit his lip and glanced down at his lap, "I w-," he quickly glanced around before shaking his head, "I long for a time when it would have been safe for me to get to know you. You seem like a cool dad, from what I've seen of you on the news with your oldest kids."

he looked up with a water smile, "I bet you're like that with the youngest you hide from the public too. I still don't know how you managed that, it's been six years." Danny chuckled, wiping the tears from his eyes.

"This is my, um, my old league sigil." Danny held up the object he had been holding, revealing a golden disk with thick rope connected to it. it had the demon head's symbol on it.

"A coat of arms. I'll leave it somewhere for you. hopefully, you can use it to get to Damian." Danny gently placed it back on the box. "I'm keeping it in a box in the walls of my room. You should be able to find it."

"I wish you and your family the best," Danny sniffed, looking back at the camera. "thank you for listening. From your long lost almost certainly dead by now son, Danny Fenton."

Bruce stared at the paused video for a minute, just trying to process everything he just saw. he needed confirmation, he knew it was true, it had to be, there's no way Danny could fake this. but Bruce needed to confirm. make sure he isn't seeing things.

absently, Bruce pulled out his phone and dialed his youngest's, was he still the youngest? or was Danny? number.

the tone didn't even ring longer than five seconds before his son's voice echoed into the silent office, "Father."

"Damian, did you have a twin named Danny?" Bruce asked, not cutting around the bush.

dead silence, he couldn't even hear Damian's breath.

then, "...Who told you?"

Damian's voice wasn't angry or fearful, it was sad and confused and wavered like the last leaf on a tree clinking on for dear life in a blizzard. it cemented the break in Bruce's heart as he stared at the tearful face of his son, his son who claimed to be dead already.

hanging up, Bruce quickly sent the video to Damian and waited. he needed a minute to process what just happened. Clicking play, Bruce rewatched the video, hoping to find another clue.

Damian called back a few minutes later, the sound of Danny's voice echoing in the background telling Bruce his son had watched and rewatched the video just like he had.

"Father. I do not care what state he is in, even if there is only a single molecule left. I'm going to bring him home. We must discover exactly what happened to Danny, the truth."

"I couldn't agree more, Damian," Bruce grunted, standing up. Pushing his chair in, he turned his laptop off and made his way to his office door. "I'll be home soon, gather the others. tell them all hands on deck."

"yes, Father," Robin replied, hanging up not even a second later.

Shoving his phone in his pocket and opening his office door, Batman started making his way home.

Next

[frownyalfred]

Hi, you said "no I don't know him"/"he's my dad" and dealt me immediate psychic damage please say more words that hopefully make this better

(spoiler alert: nothing can erase the inherent tragedy of this)

the ask/prompt was about Dick and Bruce not acknowledging each other in the League, right? so kind of playing with this identity porn idea of Batman and Nightwing both being separate vigilantes working with the League with no outward, immediately obvious, or self-professed connection between them other than both being from Gotham (which might not even be something they reveal, for OpSec reasons).

Why would they choose to do this? Maybe Bruce wants to eliminate any connections between them to make it even harder to guess their secret identities. Having two pieces of the puzzle always makes it easier to solve than if you only have one.

Maybe Dick wants to be his own vigilante, separate from Batman's influence, and stand on his own with the League. Maybe he wants to put space between him and Robin, and asks Bruce not to fully acknowledge him outside of Gotham.

Maybe it's a mix of both? Or maybe it just never truly comes up, and both of them are too smart and well-trained as a default to give anything away in front of the League. Maybe the League knows that they know each other, that they've worked together before, but nothing more than that.

And what even ties Nightwing to Batman, really? Funding, the suit, the relationship to Robin, but none of those are immediately apparent. Gotham is a common denominator, but there are multiple vigilantes in most major US cities and Nightwing largely operates in Bludhaven. Training/fighting style? Also hard to identify without being in the know. Essentially, if they don't say anything to the League, how much can the average person even infer, much less notice?

So those two lines stuck out to me. In response to a well-meaning or confused League member asking if Dick knows Batman, he really only has two possible responses: "No, I don't know him" or the truth.

That there is a connection between them, and it's actually damn near sacred. He was, is, Batman's partner. He knows Bruce like almost no one else does. They're spoken about in the same breath. Or they were, once upon a time. They have mirrored beginnings, twin motivations. They fallback on each other, even when they're fighting bitterly. Dick is still who Alfred calls, when Bruce is in a self-destructive rut. And vice versa.

But what would prompt Dick to break that code of silence? I guess it depends on why it exists. And so for that second response -- "That's my dad" -- I was thinking of a situation where it was because of Dick's need to be separate from Batman. And Bruce obliges the secrecy, because it's logical and also Dick asked. But one day Bruce is injured on a mission, or hurting somehow, and the League is panicked trying to figure out what to do and Dick is right there. Batman's partner is a foot away and nobody knows. And Dick suddenly has to make a decision that is, in that instant, more easy than anything he's ever done.

"That's my dad."

[junespriince]

Wally: I sit here today because my uncle retired and you guys just dragged me in here, I didn't have a choice. I was working my own city, the Titans, and sometimes helped other heroes and now I have to work here and come to almost daily meetings? How can I get fired? Can marrying your son in Vegas make you let me leave? I want out of this.

Bruce: the dimension overlord said you must be here, we need a speedster or balance will be distributed.

Wally: how about you disturb deez nuts old man. I don't give two donkeys pucks about this "balance" when I'm forced to look at my two biggest enemies all day.

Oliver: I know Barry raised you, but could you have manners kid?

Wally: can you stop getting pegged by my therapist?

Oliver, blushing as if the league doesn't already know this:

Wally: no? Okay, then shut up.

Bruce: this is a bit excessive, West.

Wally: says the guy who fights his ex father in law/enemy shirtless. I don't know about you, but if my son grandfather challenged me to a duel the shirt stays on.

Bruce: how?

Wally: what does "dating your son" mean to you? Self proclaimed greatest detective over here lady and gents, give him some applause for being stupid. Though, with all the smart women you attracted I guess it has it charms to a certain group.

Clark: a lot of sass today, huh?

Wally: and rightly so Mr. Kent—

Clark: kid, you've known me for years and marrying my kid, it's uncle Clark now.

Wally: sir, I was raised my a Midwestern woman, it's sir, ma'am, and whatnot, deal with it. Anyways, it's rightly deserved, I'm losing a lot of precious time spending it here because Gotham's playboy bicycle decided now he'll have a standard and not fix this problem by helping the dimensions asshat get laid. Do you understand how much this cut into my personal life outside of heroing, Bruce?

Bruce: well—

Wally: shut up sir, you don't because unlike you I don't have a son I was blackmailed into adopting that can run the business, no, I'm an average man here working a real job, and trying to make time for my boyfriend. We get it, you're an emo furry with a tragic backstory that makes it hard to emote, well bucko guess what, I had shitty parents, uncle Hal thinks I have no friends, and what else... OH yeah! I was stuck in the speed force trying to get out and everyone I loved stop trying to save me and assumed I was dead. So, fire me!

Bruce, and his ego™: no. Balance needs to be kept.

Wally: I will make you regret this choice.

Both of them glaring at each other:

Diana: well, at least meetings will be interesting.

Hal: in my defense you didn't have friends over when I visited so how was i supposed to know...

Oliver: didn't Barry told you one time to come because Wally was at my house having a sleepover with Roy?

Hal: ... Okay I'mma be so real right now, I heard come over and the rest was white noise.

Wally: ew. I'm right here.

Hal: kid, hush, the adults are talking.

Wally: ... I'm 29, dude bye. I'm done with this. *Gets up and leaves*

Arthur: he has grown up so much.

Bruce, who knows Wally at his worst teen years: yeah, he's gotten worse.

Oliver: so about this fighting shirtless with your ex father in law.

Bruce: so about you getting pegged by our therapist.

Oliver:

Bruce:

Oliver: I hate you.

Bruce: yeah, yeah, love you too idiot.

[centralcitizeningotham]

Guys, my cat is still missing :(

his name is Gizmo and he likes jingly toys

[aangelinakii]

I DON'T SMOKE.

— if you need to be mean, be mean to me.

summary : after another inevitable argument, jason picks up the pack of cigarettes he hates to pick up. seems like he's been seeing it more than usual recently.

TRIGGER WARNING BEFORE YOU READ : mention of smoking / possible addiction to nicotine, and a very toxic unhealthy relationship

jason wasn't a smoker before he met you. in fact, he had been quite healthy; always eating well, didn't drink often, exercised an hour every day. but now he always kept a pack of camels in his bag.

they tasted shit, which made it hurt just that much more.

for some reason, you seemed to bring the worst out in him, and he for you. but he couldn't seem to let you go. it was as if you were the nicotine he brought into his lungs; he wanted more, needed more, craved more.

spend too long apart and his body physically missed your presence, as unhealthy as it were.

each time you fought – always about something stupid, something small – he took a puff or two. or until his fingers were blistered and burnt, and there was barely any tobacco left. the correlation became uncanny. you were a cigarette to him; better than any camel he'd had. but you were deteriorating him, bit by bit.

his friends and family had noticed long ago, but any time they tried to talk to him about it, jason was quick to lash out and deny. inside he knew, but outwardly admitting any of the pain you gave him caused his heart to ache.

no matter what you did, he would forgive you, almost straight away. sometimes it was bad and it took him a few days, but he'd always come running back, you knew that. he knew that.

part of him even expected things to get better, after a hug and a kiss. "i'm so sorry for hurting you, my love," you would say every time. "i will do better, i promise."

both of you knew full well not to trust anything that came out of your mouth.

alas, the two of you had broke out into a full-on fight during dinner. neither of you could remember what it was about by now; it was always something dumb, anyway. the walls shook as you wailed, screamed, shouted and cried at one another.

as you ended in tears and a shaking embrace, everything came to a close, but that itch in the back of jason's mind had ticked off. he needed a smoke.

he'd waited until you were asleep. you weren't supposed to know that he smoked, but you did, and he knew that you did; he wasn't good at hiding it, and it was impossible to ignore the stench of smoke on his breath and on his jackets.

in the pale moonlight, jason sat on the edge of your shared bed, knee jiggling anxiously. his eyes flicked towards the nightstand, and he reached out towards it, carefully pulling on the knob so as to not wake you.

there it was: his pack.

he slid open the window, peering behind him to make sure your back was still turned to him, and your frame was still snoring softly. a nicotine stick hung from his lips, and his lighter had been tucked into one of his hands.

with the window open, the gotham fumes began to waft into the room; an average scent of gasoline and tires. down below, cars still roamed the roads, despite the time. but gotham was a city that didn't sleep, and accompanied those who shared the same habit of staying up.

that's why he loved living in gotham. well... define love.

sparks flew as flint hit steel, and the end of his cigarette sizzled as the lighter gave flame.

jason's anxiety finally began to settle as he inhaled through his mouth, clouds forming in his lungs. and he breathed out, the fog he'd taken in releasing into the gotham air.

something shuffled behind him, and the man flinched as a pair of arms wrapped around his waist, his flesh instinctively retracted.

"come back to bed..." your fatigued voice thrummed against his back, muted by the fabric of his shirt.

he lowered his arm out the window, in an attempt to redirect the smoke steaming from the end of his cigarette – but he knew you weren't stupid.

"yeah, just a minute," he grumbled, thumb stroking against your forearm for a moment before softly pushing you away.

as you tumbled back to the sheets behind him, he took one more quick inhale before pressing the ashes of the cigarette against the brick wall outside, and flicking away the remnants of addiction.

[marvelmaniac2000]

My Spaghetti and Meatballs

Summary: imagine giving Eddie simple human decency and he definitely gets stalkerish and insane. 

Characters: Edward Nashton x fem! Reader 

Minors DNI / +18 Only 

Subject: Smut! Stalking, voyeurism, anxiety reader, aesthetically pleasing content, extreme attachment/abandonment issues, orphanage, unprotected sex (practice safe sex everyone) 

Words: 2.0k

Side notes: I’ve been bored lately and needed to dribble some stories down. I’ve been sickly obsessed with pauly poo.  This was inspired by the spaceman intereview he did with adam sandler and fantasmas tv show.

 You hummed a tune to yourself to keep calm.. You were very hungry and you planned on making spaghetti and meatballs for yourself. But also of course to help save money by having leftovers. Some of your anxiety started to kick in because it was a little dark outside in the city and you were alone commuting to the grocery store. Even though Gotham had its reputation it wasn’t much you could do but always look out for yourself. You had on beat up converse shoes and warm auburn fall peacoat on in a cool first week of October. You were about average looking (in your own opinion) and didn’t draw much response from other strangers.

"Ok" you mouth to yourself, while looking at your grocery list in your notes. I need noodles, ground beef, etc . You mumbled to yourself and looked down the aisle for each ingredient. 

 “H-hey excuse me” you snapped your head up and looked at the man in front of you. 

 “Hi” you gave a dry response before realizing who it was.

“O-oh my goodness, Eddie!..” you swiveled your items out of your basket in your hand before bringing him in a hug. Edward gasped a little, finally seeing you in front of him. It has almost been years but it only felt like yesterday since he saw you in the very flesh directly talking to him. He has been following you and keeping touch with you since the day you guys both turned eighteen, but technically you both have been on your own since sixteen from the orphanage. It was one of the worst days of his life, when you finally were taken into an adoptive family at the late age of sixteen years old. 

   It felt like a jab to his stomach losing the family member he created within himself. The foster parents didn’t mean anything to him, the real mother he had was you. You were his sister, mother and girlfriend he needed. You were everything he needed of course.Edward knew he wasn’t going to be adopted, but he didn’t care. He stared at you barely able to make out any last words. Just your presence and knowing you were ok was what all he needed to know. As long as you were protected and were there for him, he could continue on. He knew you like the back of his hand. Some days he could go without checking on you, but he had to make sure you were still ok. Sometimes he would send money and support to your live stream, and fantasize of the costume you put on display for that video. It was his ritual. 

 “You look good Eds, you’re still just as adorable and sweet growing up” you couldn’t help but squeeze  his pink cheeks together and peck him on the cheek. Words couldn’t describe what he meant to you. You and Eddie were the only ones who tried to survive the foster home life and survive shitty school years too. You both slept together in the same bunk rooms, you slept in his bed when he was scared and rubbed him to sleep, you made sure his favorite cereal was there, even if the other kids sometimes would get greedy and not share. You cleaned his glasses for him, bought him clothes with little money you did have from your high school job. He was your baby. He gave you meaning when nothing else felt like so. Eddie's face turned a flush red. A rush of happiness and warmth swept over his body that he never felt in awhile. But it has been awhile since anyone showed him any type of affection and especially coming from you. Any type of praise from you sent him over the edge and he wanted more. 

  “I missed you too, I wanted to make sure you were still doing ok, I see you’re working now and have your own life” Eddie wanted to know if you had a boyfriend. He couldn’t afford to have you keep any secrets away from him.  “Yea I’ve been more happy than I've ever been, my own money, own life, no worries, it’s great.” You notice how upset your Eddie looked. “Why don’t you come over to my apartment, I’m making your favorite” you smiled. If Eddie could cry of happiness he could. He wanted to ball up in bed with you and cuddle as long as he could. “That would be great” he pushed the rim of his glasses up and followed you out to purchase the groceries. 

  You both arrived at your apartment that was dimly lit with your tv still on. “Oh uh sorry for the mess I don’t usually like to clean up until I get the energy to sometimes.” You wanted to make Eddie feel at home like he always felt. “Um just sit over there Eds you can watch tv if you like, there’s a blanket over there” 

 “It’s ok I’ll just watch tv from here, you always go above and beyond for me” Eddie was just happy to finally have you here and inside your apartment. He looked around taking in the different furniture, decor and things you had inside your place. He notices your desktop and computer in the corner of the room with a gaming chair just like in your videos you use.

  You took off your jacket and lit a bunch of candles that you had decorated on your kitchen counters. 

You wondered what Eddie was doing around lately. He didn’t seem like the type to hang around town alone. But maybe he has changed now that he is older. You let the noodles boil and create your special tomato sauce in a separate pan. 

  “Sooo eddie what have you been eating now huh? Frozen dinners?” you joked while looking at him mindlessly watching tv. He looked so cute with his big puppy dog eyes.

   “Very funny but I make do with whatever I can make myself” he smiled. “But I always miss your food ” He watched the tv hoping this moment would never end. Your cheek flushed a bit red hearing him talk. Eddie was somewhat of an old soul, he reminded of guys who deserve everything in the world, but was just sort of awkward. But it was nice finally having him around, it did feel a bit lonely not having anyone around, but you wouldn’t change it for the world, finally having your peace and independence living your life. The tomato sauce smelled amazing in the entire room. You pour the paste inside the noodles and mix it well together. You brought a plate to Eddie with a fork. Eddie smiled and felt like he was home once again. You sat next to him curled up on the side watching whatever show was on. 

   “So what do you do now for work?” You nervously peeled your fingernails. Eddie chewed with a mouth full of food before he talked. 

“Nothing much, just a financial analyst at a company, but I guess it’s ok” he hummed while he ate. “Oh that’s good to hear” you watch him with adoration while he stuffed his face. 

  “Do you mind if I stay here for the night? I think it’s supposed to be a really bad storm tonight.” Edward looked at you with his eyes. “Of course it’s not a problem at all,” you smiled. “Here I’ll get you some towels and stuff for a shower.” Edward watches you leave, seeing you disappear in your bedroom. He wondered what your bedroom looked like. If it was normal and basic or with different colors with many pillows. 

  “Um the towels and stuff are in this closet if you need them, you gesture the closet against the wall” you showed him. “Ok” he nodded. 

“I’ll just jump in the shower real quick” you told him before making your way out. Eddie gave you a reassuring nod before looking out the autumn window noticing the seasons beginning to change. He hated the fact that he lied to you, but it was the only way he could stay any much longer here with you. He watched you make your way into the bathroom to cleanse yourself up. Eddie pants began to harden listening to the echo of the water running down your body and your nude body lathered up with soap. 

His aching bulged pressed against him. He tossed the blanket over his legs to casually cover his member. 

  To make matters even worse you came out of the steaming hot shower with a sexy baby doll gown and fluff slippers. “It’s all yours Eddie” you sat next to him on the sofa in a sigh of relief. “Thanks” he managed before striding in the bathroom. You cover yourself up with a cozy blanket and turn the channels to see what else is on cable. 

   Eddie noticed used pads and looked inside your dirty laundry basket. You had a pretty lace black thong that had trimmed lace around it. He balled up the fabric and stuffed two more pairs inside his pocket before jumping into your shower. Eddie missed everything about you and your warmth. The way you took care of everything around him. Then finally he slowly came back out with only his clothes but with a tank top and his boxer briefs. 

  “Come cuddle with me Eddie” you laying gently on top of him.  “You know I’m glad you’re doing ok eddie” you held him close feeling him.

   “Me too” he mumbled in heaven. You felt his bulge between your legs and tried to make sure you weren’t imagining it. Eddie couldn’t manage to get it down even after taking a shower. He wanted you so badly right at that moment. “Do you need help with this?” you whispered while moving your hand to his boxers. “Umm yes” he groaned. “I can help” you push your hand down in his boxers and rub the precum that glossed over his dick. 

“Just like that?” you managed to say.

   “Y-yes” he groaned again. You pull yourself up to kiss him on the lips before rubbing his member a little harder. Eddie bucked his hips to your hand as you continued your pace. 

You moaned from feeling him get pleasure from it. 

  “Can I put it in me Eddie?” you asked him before stopping. 

   “Of course I want you now,” he demanded. You slide your panties off and stick it in slowly before riding him at a slow deliberate pace. Eddie held onto your hips as guiding for you to go quicker.

    “Oh Eddie” you moaned, lowering yourself to kiss him passionately. His hands roamed under your gown and greedily gave your plump boobs a squeeze. You whimper feeling him take control. Eddie could barely catch his breath before his mouth met your soft nipples. You gave out a loud moan rocking your hips harder with him grazing your wet insides. 

   “Mmmm” you threw your head back and felt him touch your g spot. 

  “Right there baby” Eddie put on his glasses and now watched you with his emerald eyes. “I’m going to come” Eddie murmured  before cumming his load inside of you. You stop your pace before catching your breath. 

 There was a rumble of thunder outside before you both realized what was happening. “I’m glad you’re here to keep me safe huh?” you giggled. “I guess so, we always had each other's backs, remember?” 

“I do” you cooed. Eddie pulled himself out of you before covering the blanket with both of you falling asleep.   

My Card 💚

[brucewaynehater101]

They are so big and so cute! And if Huggin and Munnin are well above the average size of ravens they could be nearly the size of Tim's torso. Certainly bigger than his head. Plus they are so, so smart. Some of the smartest birds in the world. Imagine Tim getting in kidnapped as a civilian and Huggin simply grabs the key for him while Munnin acts as a look out. Tim escapes without ever being seen.

Tim also has special "bird doors" in his Nest so the whole place is filled with his many birds. Sure not all of them live there because he set up dozens of safe places around the city that are basically just Reall Big Pigeon Roosts with bird feeders in them that all types of birds are allowed in. Also the bird doors are much to small for any human to fit through, much like dog and cat doors are, and they do have actual sliding metal doors on them that are opened and unlocked by proximity of the little cameras he put on some of his birds. Roughly 4 owls, 8 pigeons, 3 Bluejays, 2 hawks, 17 crows, 9 grackles, and 20 ravens have access to his Nest. Are those a lot of keys just flying around the city? Yes. But no one knows the birds are his, Tim is constantly trying to make smaller and smaller cameras for them so that they will never be spotted, and who the fuck is gunna point to a random bird and go "that bitch has the key to Red Robin's house." And be believed by anyone who would help them catch a fucking pigeon that's just minding their own buisness?business??

The only beings who notice the cameras are other birds and the strange sparkly spot on his birds chest? It only gives his birds more Rizz. There was a study about how Zebra Finches actually preferred to mate with those who had on red tracking tags over other colors so what if this is similar? This would also mean that every spring Tim has an exponentially larger amount of birds.

Also the funniest way for the family to find out. It's one of the very rare sunny days in summer where it's Actually Hot in Gothem so the family decides it's the perfect day to use the pool in the back yard of Wayne Manor. Everyone is having an amazing time and eventually Tim gets tired so he sits down on one of the reclining pool chairs for a rest and snack, which is his chocolate free trail mix. He has a large bowl of it and ends up falling asleep with it in his lap. Just as the siblings are giggling and deciding what prank to play, a crow lands next to Tim and sqwacks a few times. Tim mumbles in his sleep but doesn't move so the bird hops up onto Tim's chair and starts to eat out of his bowl. Since it doesn't get shooed away, soon others are joining it. The family watches in amazement as Tim gets *covered* in birds that are casually eating from his bowl. There's even a pair of hawks that are perched above his head. When the bowl is empty, one of the crows bites Tim on the nose, startling him awake and he glares at the feathery fiend and very gently taps it on the beak as he scolds, "Monroe, I told you to stop biting my nose. Wait- you guys ate all my trail mix!" He has forgotten that his siblings are there because it's usually the birds or siblings, never both.

Oh, and when they eventually ask why he hid the birds, Tim simply says, "last time anyone found out, Janet called an exterminator."

I love this so much. Him building little nests all over the city for them is adorable and great. It would be cool if he started that before his Robin years as he was out and about in Gotham. He just built small little safe places for the birds, and it rapidly expanded as Tim got more experience, more resources, and more birds to look after.

Your logic with the keys is fantastic! When the batfam finds out, I bet birds pop by Tim's place while whatever family member is just chilling. Like maybe they are watching a movie and said bat gets distracted by the coming and goings of various birds (the birds probably also mess a bit with Tim or his space as fond pestering before leaving again). Maybe a few are just staring at the family member without blinking or taking a nap.

I wonder if Damian would start to make excuses to go over to Tim's Nest as much as possible. He states he needs to "ensure Timothy is maintaining adequate nesting conditions for the various species of birds" or that he will "test the Nest's security" by dropping by unannounced and breaking in.

Perhaps some of the birds watch over his various family members for Tim? Especially Duke because nobody else works the day shift with him, and birds are more common during the day (and thus less suspicious).

[thesharktanksdriver]

The Spider’s web (platonic)

You used to be an average kid, one who went about their day without so much as a care in the world

Granted, you were being raised by your elderly aunt and uncle, and you were somewhat of a science wiz but other than that yeah pretty normal

Until a radioactive spider bitt you after you and your uncle got into an accident which ended up with you as the survivor

And that lead you becoming a web-slinging vigilante known as spider

Ok scratch that maybe you weren’t so normal after all but to be fair no one was in Gotham

During the day you were a teenager who went to school, made some extra cash on the side to support your aunt after your uncle’s death

But at night you dawn your suit and sling across the city helping as best you could

Unlike Batman or his figurative family you help out in smaller ways

You help by bringing people home safely, handing out umbrella when it’s raining, saving cats out of trees, stopping some petty crime and giving the criminals a talk to find out why they needed to do said crime, helping firefighters ect

You still saved quite a few people but you also focused on making others happy

Since something as small as a wave of kind gesture of a stranger can improve someone’s day significantly

You also focus on helping those who are committing petty crime since you know it’s usually out of desperation

And desperation is a big thing in Gotham unfortunately

Your a more friendly figure compared to the Batman, bright colours and an expressive mask that makes you more approachable

Along with that your quite vocal, saying hi to passersby’s as you swing past or offering high fives

Also a lot of quips, like a lot. plus jokes thrown to make people laugh

Your swinging webs dissolve after a set period of time so by morning their gone thus no complaints from business owners about it

Whilst Batman and his team look out for Gotham as a conglomerate you look out for the little guy

Pitching in to areas when the other vigilantes of the night can’t get to

It’s actually quite fun and no matter how tired an beat up you are from stopping a minor scuffle it’s worth it to you

The bruises and black eyes serving as metals to your meddling in making sure someone didn’t get shanked

Gordon is the only cop you trust and actively report to him about cops that are taking advantage of their power

You have a little camera on your suit making filming encounters much easier along with the fact you sometimes take photos for fun

And use some of those photos for money…you spend a lot more than you probably should do you sometimes sell photos to newspapers

Anyways, you leave the clips of certain cops for him to see and review

Which also makes most cops not really like you but they don’t really like Batman either so it’s not like your the only one

He’s pretty friendly with you but you can also tell he’s worries

Like real worried

It’s basically obvious to everyone your a kid despite how you try to deepen your voice a bit

He knows he can’t really stop you so he does his best to give you tips and pats on the back for your work

He swears that when he hears about you on the news he gets more grey hairs

Or when you show up at his window donuts in hand with a nasty bruise on your jaw

Listen he doesn’t care you “have a weird healing factor” your getting a patch for that

Barbara laughs when he grumbles that he now has a new kid to look after

You don’t admit it but he reminds you a lot of your uncle and it makes you feel nostalgic

On long nights for Gordon you like to swing by (hah get it) and leave him some coffee and donuts

He appreciates it but wishes you’d let him pay you back

Another thing Gordon doesn’t know is that when your uncle died he was the cop that comforted you back at the station

While all the others worked he took the time to help you

Which is something you’d never forget

So to pay the favour back in some sense you do your best to help him as well

But he doesn’t have to know your reasoning…yet

You sometimes leave little notes for him with doodles of yourself that have motivational messages

Batman asks him about you since he has really had to time to actually talk to you but Gordon tells him your a good kid

But your probably too stubborn to stop doing what your doing

Gordon really appreciates what you do even if it’s not taking down super villains

You go out of your way to make others happy and make the streets a little more safe

Plus you seemed focused on rehabilitation and helping people who do crime as a last option for survival

He’s actually met quite a few people you’ve talked to and helped get back on their feet

Probably had a little notebook where he puts all your doodle notes

Whenever you leave his office he tells you to stay safe and that you’d doing good out there

You always give him a thumbs out before back flipping out his window

Despite how many times you do it he looks out to make sure your ok

Barbara meets you one day when she stopped by to make sure her dad was ok and found you and him talking

When she came in you jumped to the ceiling and they just watched you for a minute before laughing

Honestly Barbara is really fun and cool

Whenever she stops by her dad’s office she kinda silently hopes your there cause your a ray of sunshine

She appreciates your work a lot and it never ceases to make her smile when she offhandedly hear people talk about your deeds

Definitely teases her dad a lot lol

Sometimes like Gordon you leave little notes for her on her wheelchair

You both develop so many inside jokes that Gordon can only scratch his head at

She leaves you snacks like granola bars and smoothies for her dad to give you

Like her dad she’s concerned but moreso about how your doing this without anyone else to help you

Sure your activities aren’t taking down and making enemies with super powered villains but all you needed is one bad encounter and your down

And it worries her how you don’t seem to care about yourself and put others happiness on pedestal

Like helping others matters but so does helping yourself

As oracle she sometimes hacks stuff to give you little hints or tricks for you to use

These have probably saved you from getting an infection from leaving your wounds unbothered due to your “it’ll heal” mentality

She’s kinda silently curious what your abilities allow you to do. Like she knows you can climb walls and you have some type of healing factor but she wonders if there’s more

So y’all make a game out of it and every week she guesses one possible ability you have and you answer her

Like her dad she knows your too stubborn to stop

You have too much of a big heart to not help people, your the one person who doesn’t stand down no matter the punches thrown your way

It’s an admirable trait but also dangerous

You geek out with her over tech and when you get your own popsicle

Sure that popsicle doesn’t look the greatest but your amazed anyways over the smallest stuff like that

It makes her heart swell when you talk about how happy you felt when you found out you had fanart!

It’s normal for hero’s to have that but your just so flabbergasted that someone went through the effort of drawing you

It reminds her once again that your a kid in all of this

One day she’s asks why you haven’t met Batman yet and you tell her why

That your kinda scared of him considering Gotham isn’t the friendliest to meta humans

And consider you now have powers your part of that crowd

Plus you just want to help in ways Batman usually can’t

She’s understanding to this and makes note to tell Bruce

At this point she probably knows your identity but only by accident

She never brings that up though

Content with just letting you go on in peace without you worrying about her accidentally spilling the info to someone

Her heart will explode if you ever mention how batgirl was one of your favourite hero’s growing up

Bane is the first real villain who kinda takes an interest in you from seeing you firsthand one day

So he has he men track you down and bring you to him

And then he finds out that you know most of them already and just willingly followed them?

Yeah turns out you already knew a lot of his men cause you’ve helped a handful of them with stuff like car troubles and making sure the neighborhoods a few live in are safer

And also inadvertently convincing some of them to get a better job instead of committing crime and they took that as become a full on henchman

Your a bit disappointed but Bane is a fair boss so it somewhat makes up for the fact their still in the crime business

Meanwhile bane is kinda confused cause your a kid??

Like sure he fights Robin but even then he goes somewhat easy and they have Batman as a mentor

Your just a fucking kid on their own doing this?!?

Dear god this man is so concerned

Even more so when you try to deepen your voice and then it cracks and there’s an awkward silence afterwards

Oh and then they hear your stomach grumble

You get a full on meal from them giving you some of their lunches plus some extra snacks

Your such a good kid and he’s like real worried that one day someone will take advantage of that

So he kinda begins training you, well not full on training but giving you some pointers

Like better stances or how to throw a better punch

He finds it really funny how expressive you are with your mask and how your tiny compared to him

He quickly catches on that you seemingly have enhanced senses and strength cause almost no one can beat him in a fight let alone a young teenager (it was more of a playful fight but point still stands)

You once offhandedly mention that you have to care for your elderly aunt by accident and he’s now packing you some extra food and slips some money into there as well

Probably knows he can figure out your identity real quick but doesn’t make the effort since he’d rather you go to him yourself if/when your ready

Is this what being a parent is like? (Yes, yes it is Bane)

He helps improve your suit and gives suggestions on what material would be better

Nearly has a heart attack when you one day show up to his base with a stab wound

Sure it’s healing but like what the fuck?!

His men kinda tease him for being a mother hen

He can’t help it though cause he’s always had a soft spot for kids and knowing your out there possibly getting hurt makes his uneasy

When you talk about science he finds himself happy cause your clearly passionate about the subject

Probably compliments you about your knowledge and pats you on the shoulder

He gives you nicknames in Spanish but his favourite is “pequeña araña” which means little spider

If you already know Spanish he’s 100% talking to you in it but if you don’t then he’s kinda teaching you by accident

For the love of god please say that your suit is properly insulated cause he’s gonna get grey hairs if he knows that your going out in Gotham during the winter freezing your ass off

Same for summer as well cause he knows that being in a head to toe bodysuit in the heat isn’t good

You met deadshot through his daughter Zoe by complete accident

Like you were swinging past some apartments while she was doing some homework she was stuck on and spotted you

And then she called out and you quickly ended up helping her with that homework

And that kinda became a weekly tradition where you’d just stop by on every Saturday to check her work and help her if she was stuck

During one of these he walks in as your perched near her window helping her with a math equation

He’s kinda confused for a minute until Zoe waves him over and says that you’d been her tutor for the past month

After that he kinda tracks you down on his own time as your having a burger on a building and talks to you

He thanks you and also asks why your doing the whole vigilante business as such a young age

You don’t tell him the full story but just enough where he gets a good picture as to why

Zoe becomes one of your fans and he has to say that it’s a lot better than her liking Batman or one of his robins lol

You still help her with homework but now you also show up to talk to her and her dad

She likes to brag to her father about how if she did good on her next test that you promised to make her a hoodie that resembles you suit

When he’s out on “jobs” he asks for you to check up on her and make sure she’s ok

more concerned than he lets on

When he gets put on the suicide squad he gets real upset if Amanda Waller even mentions you

Sometimes if you see him you like to him a wave which he gives back with a small smile

You have the honour of being one of the only heroes he likes

He likes that you stick up for the small guy, that your the “neighborhood hero” instead of the Gotham hero

Has definitely saved you numerous times without you even knowing

Feels old when you call him “mr.shot” even more so if you do something like backflip off a building

Like he subconsciously knows your ok but his dad senses are screaming at him and rushes over to the edge to see if your ok

He finds it really nice when you walk people home to make sure they feel safe

It’s a small thing but something a lot of people in Gotham appreciate since the streets at night aren’t the safest

You buy knock-off merch of heroes and give it out to kids but save the merch of you for his daughter

He now had a little keychain that he keeps on his person of your mask in inverted colours

It makes him chuckle quite a bit

No one dares put out a hit on you cause of him and Deathstroke

Speaking of which Deathstroke sought you out from seeing you one day whist in civilian clothes

You piqued his interest so when you were one day just swing around he was able to catch you by surprise even with your spidy-senses

Only for you to catch him off guard by how your somehow able to throw him off you like he was nothing

And then web him to a wall

Now you’ve really piqued his interest

Meanwhile your freaking out across from him and he’s just laughing and then congratulates you on getting the better of him

Que confusion

Oh yeah beforehand he quickly found out who you were

Yeah…not fun when he then brings that up

But anyways

Slade takes to basically full on training you cause he sees your potential

It’s weird at first but it quickly becomes routine for him to randomly drop by and give you lessons

It’s actually really useful especially since he also helps you hone your skills even more

Not to mention that he also helps you keep your identity a better secrets cause in his words “kid it’s honestly a miracle that the entire city hasn’t found out, your at least better than superman and his disguise”

At some point after a “exam” with him and you win he gifts you a completely upgraded suit as a gift

Your left confused but he just shrugs it off saying that you’d lived up to his expectations so you deserve something for that

Now your suit has proper heating! And it’s waterproof unlike before

He’s honestly not sure how you survived this long in your suit so he’s at least happy the new one he gifted you a better

Plus now you have extending spider arms that are super cool

Now you can more effectively hold up debris when saving people!

(Not their intended use but he supposes that you do you)

One thing he can’t fix is how trusting you are of others

Cause he’s tried countless times to teach you not to do that but your head it to thick for even his vastly worded criticism to break

Unlike him and Nightwing he’s had a very different dynamic with you Aka gruff dad and ray of Sunshine child

Aka the “someone will die” “of fun!”

He feels so old when your doing flips and every fucking acrobatic known to man

Like when Nightwing does it he feels a bit of his age but with you it’s worse

Rose jokes that your an honorary sibling now which makes you giggle as he standing behind y’all all stoic and such

Both swear they’ve never seen you without a smile or quippy remark despite having a broken rib

That’s why their surprised when you sometimes get a bit solemn or seem to hold an untold sadness in your eyes now more than ever

He doesn’t pry like he did when initially finding out your identity but he’s definitely worried

Mr.Freeze is someone you go out on your own to find after hearing how he was trying to find a cure for his wife’s illness

Your Aunt in her old age had been getting worse and you could tell she was gaining something that wasn’t an ordinary Illness

All hospitals you went to said they couldn’t do anything so you went to him instead

Which he certainly didn’t really expect

Like sure he’s heard of you but to suddenly had a teenage knock at his frost covered window to his lab at midnight is kinda unexpected

He’s guarded and ice cold as his name implies but seems to warm up once you mention your situation

How you didn’t know what to do, and that the hospitals turn her away for her older age or say that nothing was wrong when you knew it was

Your just a kid, one who is doing their best despite circumstances

And he from then on he knew couldn’t turn you away especially with how Nora wouldn’t want that

He finds your company to be nice especially once hearing that your brand of heroism is done to help out the average citizens of Gotham in their day to day lives

Your a change in his routine and life that he needs, someone to be a small bit of light in the ever encompassing darkness that fills his life

You help him as well in the lab, putting your science wiz knowledge to the test as you do your best to help

He enjoys the company quite a bit

Especially as you leave little notes (as usual) for him to find with little puns

He chuckles at all of them despite hot corny they are

As time goes on he sees the crack in your resolve though as his tests go nowhere

You push yourself though, to the limit to try and find something, anything

But it’s all for nought

There are times you fall asleep in full costume at his lab, he always places a blanket around your shoulders

Never once having the temptation to pull up the mask

He can tell your already going through the stages of grief before you even get the call that she’s gone

Just a feeling in your gut that it’s getting worse as you increase your work

And then it happens

That dreaded call that he can remember so vividly from his own when Nora had almost passed

Your silent, dead silent

And then like a gust of wind your off

He can only hear your soft sobs as you exit through a window and off into the night

He can only hope you’ll be ok, that you’ll turn out different from him in the grief that’s consuming you

Because unlike him your a ray of sun that the world needs compared to his somber moonlight

You end up crying on a rooftop

Shaky breaths ranking your form as you sob

But then you hear a scream from an alleyway which makes you pause

You pull your mask down and swing down to help

A woman pushed to the ground and two men standing over her loomingly

Their easy to take down but you got stabbed pretty badly in the side

You focus on her though, helping her up despite your limp and talking her through the anxiety attack she was having

You walk her home, blood dripping down though you do your best to hide it

Your voice hoarse from crying as you do your best to make her smile

And as she closes that door and you return to that rooftop you find that your vision is getting blurry and black dots dot the edges if your eyesight

You don’t have the strength to get up despite how hard you try

Because you have to

Cause as spider no matter how hard you get pushed down you always get up

Someone looms over you with an outstretched hand

You grab theirs and they hoist you up

You feel as if your in good hands

[moonlit-imagines]

Robin and the Stray (Part 1)

Dick Grayson x reader

warnings:

a/n: you already know this is based off of an oc and you already know im gonna write it like its just your average y/n. i dont even know if yall hate this or not but TOO BAD (im kidding please start paying attention to this blog again i long for the days i mattered)

prompt:

part 2

Gotham City, all the way back when you were kids. Didn’t feel like it, though. Not when you two were up all night off on adventures—more like missions—and occasionally crossing paths. Batman and Robin weren’t too fond of you and Catwoman giving them headaches from time to time with your heists and all that fun stuff. But sooner or later they cracked and started letting you two off the hook.

The flirting was just playful at first, a literal get-out-of-jail free card, if you will. But somewhere down the line, you started to mean it. You liked your time spent with Robin, and every once in a while you’d even let him catch you.

Nights that you and Selina split up, the Bat and the Bird had to do the same. That’d when you got him alone. And after a while, you’d just end up on a random rooftop teasing him in some silly, flustering way. A cute comment here and there to let him know you were still interested. Jumping across rooftops and crawling up fire escapes to keep him on his toes while you talked. Although you were still strangers out of these costumes, you still managed to drop a little personal detail every once in a while to bond. Part of you worried if he was only letting you escape to trick you into some false sense of security, lately you’ve been returning stolen goods to him just to see him again.

And night after night there were new encounters, only in these you weren’t really doing anything wrong. Just pouncing around and watching the city, almost like you were on patrol. You could tell him you were just watching over Gotham while he was elsewhere.

It was funny how awkward he was at first when you met. But it’d been some months since the Cats got out of the bag, and Selina was starting to warm up to Batman, too. It was kind of cute. Robin seemed so much more confident talking to you nowadays, he flirted back and laughed with you and pretended you got away when Batman asked where you went (oh, and Catwoman also got away!).

There was one particular night that you’ll never forget. This one night where you’d just snuck out to be in the city, secretly hoping Robin was out, too. All suited up in your catlike garb roaming the streets and rooftops of Gotham, and hours went by without a sighting of your special guy. You sat at the ledge of a rooftop overlooking Downtown Gotham—a bit too close to GCPD, but maybe that was where you needed to be.

It wasn’t long before Robin saw a figure concerningly close to the edge of a high building, and he could just barely make out those cat ears on your head. He awkwardly split off from Batman, who warned him not to do anything stupid. They had just put away a D-list villian and, let’s face it, they’re the most annoying ones to deal with and Batman now had to wash ketchup and mustard out of the crevices of his armor.

Robin met you up top, cheeks warming when he saw your immediate smile when you turned around, he gave you the same one. “Do you want to get a pizza?” He asked you with a shrug and a tilt of his head. You furrowed your brows just barely. “I guess not?”

“I mean—sure. But you want to go now? Like, dressed like this?” You sort of giggled, leaning into the idea just a little.

“Why not?” Robin asked you, eyes gleaming with just a bit of boy wonder. “Gotham’s seen weirder.”

“How’s that gonna affect your ‘image,’ huh? A good boy like you hanging out with the likes of a cat burglar, what would dear old Jim Gordon have to say?” You kept teasing him, but it seemed he was set on the idea. “You don’t even care, do you, Birdy?”

“I don’t, actually.” He said, extending his gloved hand to you. You accepted his help off the ledge and got to your feet.

“Got a place in mind?” You asked him as he walked off without an answer. “Okay, Batman.” You crossed your arms and walked behind him, only half-amused with his manners. But he was still cute the way he acted like Batman in those bright colors and tight pants. At least they’d been tweaked over the past few months, you couldn’t tell if he’d hit some kind of growth spurt or he just really liked tight clothes.

“See that sign over there?” Robin pointed down the street, a bright neon sign displayed the word “PIZZA” in red lettering, encased in a yellow circle you assumed was also pizza. “Twenty-four hours. You’ll be glad to know they do their best work in these hours.”

“You mean ‘vigilante hours?’” You joked, nudging him with your elbow.

“Something like that.” He nudged back. Suddenly, he leaped off the edge of the building—which actually wasn’t that tall if you were used to this sort of thing—and used a grapple gun to break the landing.

“Wow. We’re doing this, huh.” You equipped a whip and secured it to the neighboring building, descending yourself in a much more anticlimactic way—but still impressive if you weren’t used to this sort of thing. “Show off.”

“Had to do it one of these days, you’re always one-upping me.” He said walking forward, just a casual stroll down the streets of Gotham in costume, ignoring any pedestrians or nearby residents that may be up this late. Part of you hoped that you’d run into trouble just to see how it’d feel to fight side by side, show him you’re more than just mischief, you’re a bit kickass, too.

After a few minutes of chatting, the pair of you made it to the pizza shop. Robin opened the door for you where the bell above the door chimed when you entered. The employees watched as two masked freaked walked inside and casually asked what they could get for you. You shrugged when Robin looked at you for your preference, letting him pick for you. Then he pulled out a couple twenty dollar bills from his pocket and told them “keep the change.”

“Got any more of those for me?” You batted your eyes and tilted your head.

“You want to get paid for this date?” He chuckled, wondering if he should make his next joke, but he knew you had a sense of humor. “Wouldn’t that make you a hooker?” You broke into laughter that he joined in on and tapped him on the arm.

“Hey, whatever you wanna call me. As long as I get a couple bucks, what’s the harm?” You joked back and Robin thought to himself how nice your genuine laughter was, not just those careful little chuckles and giggles were. Your true smile was goofy and brilliant to him. Lost in the moment, your order was called up and the two of you left the shop with a hot box of pizza.

“Hold this real quick?” Robin handed the box off to you, then grabbed your waist and grappled to a nearby rooftop as you squealed from surprise.

“What ever happened to a gentlemanly warning? I could have dropped the pizza!” You told him as he took it back.

“Looks good to me.” He peeked in and brought it to another ledge. “I take it you like the view?”

“What do you mean?” You walked closer and took a seat.

“I always see you sitting or standing on the edge of these buildings. You just brooding?” He raised a brow.

“That’s more of a Batman thing.” You took a piece of pizza and took a bite.

“Then tell me why you’re always hanging out on tall buildings.”

“I like looking around, is that a crime?” You asked with a mouthful of cheese and bread.

“No, but breaking and entering is. And stealing, of course.” He took a slice and sat beside you. Below your dangling feet was just another street of Gotham City, a street he protected and you would just watch. Nothing special about it, especially since there were no museums or penthouses here.

You sat with your hands at your sides, leaning forward a bit to get a better view of the ground. It was then that you felt a gentle touch, Robin’s hand on yours. You glanced at him from the side and he saw as your lip curled slightly. If you didn’t know any better, you might have seen him blush. It was strange in a way, feeling so drawn to someone without a name. “Robin” had a nice ring to it, though.

taglist: @volturi-stuff // @ravenmoore14 // @canarypoint // @brutal-out-here // @jinxll11 // @swanimagines // @captainshazamerica // @greek-mythographer // @cipheress-to-k-pop // @summersimmerus // @glxwingrxse // @azazel-nyx // @simsrecs // @xoxobabydolls // @ruvaakke // @ravenstrueluv // @evilcr0ne // @sydknee624 // @retvenkos // @thedarkqueenofavalon // @elenavampire21 //

[patchiko]

comic!jason todd x m!indie rock singer/guitarist reader

cold weather - glass beach

1:08 ──⚬──── 2:18

⇆ ◃◃ ıı ▹▹ ↻

🪐⁠☆ﾟ⁠.⁠*⁠･⁠｡ﾟ warnings ; sfw (none)

…

🪐⁠☆ﾟ⁠.⁠*⁠･⁠｡ﾟ contents ; hc’s totally not based off glass beach lyrics haha thats so cheesy whaat lololo…

I love the way you make me feel when I’m staring at my screen.

At 4AM, trying not to fall asleep

And you hit me up just to see if I’m OK

JASON TODD CODED SOOO BAAADD

literally how the crushes form for both sides

jason has like an inner psyche where he just fuckin knows when youre awake

if you ask him he’ll probably say something stupid like ‘i can hear your (guitar)/(voice)’ and he’s nowhere around you

and his heart throbs whenever you two stay texting for waayy tooooo loonggg, starts cheesing and shit

NEERRRDD

average jason todd text

When I keep you up sending Mamegoma Lines

You know it's shit like that that makes me wanna be alive

JASON TODD CODED LINE. CANON CANON.

he responds through his helmet while he’s kicking ass

it gets so common to a point where he ends up having a full blown convo w/ you using those stupid fuckin stickers

bug him late at night !!

he’ll tell you to gts but he’d be lying if he says it doesn’t make his heart melt when u send him these little fucks.

So I'll call in sick again just to spend the day with you

100% he’ll call a day off to hang with you

whether its showing up to your show then hitting a bar, 100%,

i need jason todd in a relationship where he just drops everything for his s/o,

fuck the mission!! he wants to listen to those fucking vocals for an hour or you shredding ur guitar!!

he’s fucking around in an arcade with you till 11pm

hes a little ass at mario kart, better with motorcycle games,

BRING HIM TO ANY SHOOTER ONES WHERE U HOLD THE GUN AND UR GETTING WAAAASHHHEDD.

he has the most fun with the halo ones or the walking dead ones

weirdly good at the multiplayer pacman games

AMAZING AT GALAXIA ILL DIE ON THIS HILLL

Wanna say I think it's so gay that we really both feel the same way

That I feel like we're more than just friends

It took too long to realize

I didn't miss the cold weather, I just missed you

Jason was never homophobic and or totally against the idea of him being gay

i dont think he was ever in a gay relationship b4 you two

bc most of the vigilante guys he met were trying to fight him or absolute dick heads,

n’ most of the male figures in his life weren’t the absolute best.

so there wasn’t tooo much room for crushing on a guy too easily

if you’d ask him abt his sexuality its smthn like ‘i think im straight but i dunno what if im not.’

heres how i think it starts ;)

you’re preforming at a bar, n’ ofc jason todd can admit when a guys cute/attractive, any guy could do that

and maybe its ur guitar or your vocals but he cant stop watching (he convinces himself its your talent which is reasonably not gay)

maybe one coincidence leads to another and you two chat and go out at times, he pulls up to your shows more.

and the whole time he thinks he’s just acknowledging that your a very attractive person,

notthin crazy to admit ya homie has mad kisssble lips after starin at them for a sec too long. lol. haha. hm.

and i think the thought really hits him when he’s out of gotham for a mission. and he’s craving your presence

he texts you but you dont respond, fuck right you have a show and the timezone difference—

n he gets fuckin, ANTSY and SAD.

he tries to smoke a cig to fuck off

but he cant stop thinking about that one night where he brings you to his favorite rooftop view of the city,

how those sly stupid jokes slip from your mouth like honey,

the way you glance at him and the moonlight on your skin

how he got that random need to just lean into your lips

and— (GAY REALIZATION PANICC) <- link

'Cause I don't need the cold weather like I need you

And I don't need the sweater weather I just need you

Na na na na na na na

Na na na na na na na

Na na na na na na na

Fuck! Hahahaha

hes unlabeled your honor.