#aspec calls

[queer-advice-hotline]

i miss the aro-ace confessions blog a lot. i’m ace myself and it was one of my favorite places to find community with fellow aspecs. now that the blog’s inactive i don’t know where to go. do you have any aspec spaces to recommend? advice in the notes is welcome as well :) thanks for starting this blog!

@our-aroace-experience and @our-queerplatonic-experience and @our-aromantic-experience are all great for sharing your experiences, asking questions, and interacting.

@fuckyeahasexual is great for other ace content.

I'm afraid that's all I have for the moment, tag some good aspec accounts if you know them!

[kiwinatorwaffles]

the funniest thing you can do to a character who has a lot of different ships in canon/fandom is to make them aromantic. most eligible bachelor sees everyone as their friends

[cr0wqui11]

The aroace experience is being in love with your friends. But. Platonically

[dangerous-fighter-fairy]

Being aroace with a squish is really like. You look so nice and cute and pretty (not like that), I’d like to snuggle up in bed with you (not like that) and play with your hair (not like that) and lay there for a while (not like that) and hold your hand all the time (not like that) and hang out with you one-on-one (not like that) and get to you know you on a deep and personal level (not like that)

[walison-abigobaldo-iii]

I love Tumblr because there are so many aro, ace and aroace people in here. It's like going to a supermarket and seeing a bunch of strangers buying the thing that only you enjoy out of everyone in the town you live in. And everyone buying it enjoys it too and it's so, so cool and it makes me really happy every time I see people with the aro, ace and aroace in their description

[evil-maryland]

Arophobes are so fucking stupid

"You just haven't found the right person!" "You're still young!"

Ok. I perhaps have found 'the right person'. now what?

I'm still under the Aromanticism Label. That didn't just change now that i have a 'right person'.

Maybe I needed an emotional bond first. Maybe I just don't like romance. Maybe I only like romance a limited amount.

Just because we don't fit into your conception of love on first sight doesn't mean we don't exist.

Happy Aromantism.

[meowzet]

good morning, asexual community! [the entirety of tumblr]

[leikeliscomet]

"Ace women have it easier than ace men because everyone thinks women are pure and men are predatory" when Black women are sexualised and Asian men are desexualised, "aroallos are privileged because they can just have sex like allo people" when gay sex bans and serophobia are alive and well, "alloaces have privilege because romance is always seen as pure and sex is always seen as bad" when gay marriage is still illegal in most parts and gay romance books are being burned, "aroaces have privilege because they have the most visibility and representation" when the aroace visibility and representation in question is harassment from TERFs and fascist Youtubers, 'asexuals have privilege over demis, greys and sex favourable aces and sex repulsed aces are the most privileged because they're seen as really asexual" when the emotionless asexual trope exists, when most sex repulsed characters are literal villains and when the go-to stance of every anti-asexual TERF, radfem, conservative and Christian puritan is that having no sex or sexual attraction at all can't exist in humans or ever should, is what happens when you have no substantial asexual or aromantic politic, remove the nuance of romance and sex as if they aren't effected by various factors, base your 'activism' on interpersonal moments over any systemic analysis and act like asexuality and aromanticism exist in a magical place unaffected by the rest of the world.

Just garlic bread and vibes, truly.

[queerum]

aromantics are way too comfortable implying friendship is the most valuable part of life to bitch about alloros doing the same thing with romance

[cosmicredcadet]

A character looks straight into the camera and says "I'm not interested in romance" and people will still say "No, it's not confirmed they're aromantic!!!" "They could change their mind!!!" "it's a challenge for them to overcome!!!" "They'll have character development that makes them fall in love"

It's like they are given the most blatant answer to a character romantic orientation and they actively ignore it. all the while all it takes is subtext for people to speak as if it is fact for a character to be any other sexuality.

[ruskalehto]

If I have to hear someone say ”it has to be romantic, or at least a qpr” about a fictional relationship one more time I’m going to explode

[queer-advice-hotline]

Hi, can someone be bi AND asexual? I am struggling with if I think the same sex is attractive to me or not... :( I THINK they look pretty sometimes, but I don't wanna kiss them, just hold hands and maybe cuddle? But I DO like the other sex and want to kiss them sometimes? I'm very ace yes, but now, I'm questioning if I am also bi and if I AM even bi.

*internal screaming*

WHAT DOSE IT MEEEEAN-

You could be asexual and biromantic.

You could also be on the asexual spectrum but not fully ace. You may be aceflux, based on what you said. Aceflux is an identity where you fluctuate between being more asexual and more allosexual.

[kiwinatorwaffles]

honestly the world would be much better if everyone just realized that asexual people can do whatever the fuck they want and still be ace btw

[laurellala-comics]

I've been having so much fun with my Ace Attorney comics lately but I've been feeling the pull to do original stuff again. So to ease into the transition, here is my (very first!) comedy zine. You may spot some familiar faces B)

Thanks for reading my goofiness! I'm including some nerd thoughts about zines under the cut

Zines are sooo cool and I assume most people have heard of them since this is tumblr BUT if you haven't! Zine is short for magazine (pronounced "zeen" it does not rhyme with vine). It usually refers to handmade pamphlets that can be created by folding and cutting a single sheet of paper, which is what I did, but it can be used for any sort of self made publication. The goal is to make something that can be reprinted and shared so mine is technically not in the spirit of that because of all my little interactive details but shh that's fine. Zines have been used in sooo many ways (Was Martin Luther's 95 theses not in a way the first zine (this is a joke)) but they are especially recognized as part of the punk movement as a way of fighting back against mainstream media and of sharing information around! It was a way to get around censorship and spread the word about social movements and political messages buuuut it has also always been used to share fun things, like music recommendations OR FAMOUSLY. STAR TREK SPOCK KIRK FAN FICTION (this is real and there are academic papers about this). Some of the earliest m/m fanfic was passed along through zines because they did not have ao3 back then! All they had was a typewriter and a dream! It's actually sooo silly, but I took a class in college that heavily emphasized these zines as leading to the fandom culture we had today, so they really did shape the world we live in today. Tumblr posts are like our own little zines that we share, with our own messages and thoughts and yes even hand drawn gay people...

Anyway, like I mentioned, in these fandom spaces you had queer zines that were about explicitly romantic and sexual relationships between fictional men. At the time, slash shipping was not the most common way to engage with fandom, but today it has become very mainstream and widely accepted amongst the fandom. But you know what queer behaviors are still not mainstream within fandom spaces, even within queer fandom spaces? Aro ace rep babyyyy. With that in mind, I feel like what is considered radical and abnormal these days in queer fandom spaces is to engage with fictional men (or any characters) from an aromantic or asexual lens. And so I am here to hold your hand and walk you through the wonderful radical world of imagining non-romantic scenarios with fictional guys. You can have so much fun with it and I think more people should do it. What if you stood in line at the bank and your favorite anime man was in front of you. What if you had to go in for jury duty and the guy from five nights at freddy's was there. What if you went to the library and spock and kirk were both there researching the history of zines. In a world that expects us to prioritize one normative romantic and sexual relationship as the big thing that will bring you happiness and fulfillment, it is radical to say "actually, i could probably still be really happy and fulfilled if i had some cool friends to hang out with and do mundane things with. And also what if those friends were fictional lawyers."

Anyway. Thank you to all the spirk shippers who worked hard to get us here, I will pick up your mantle and continue to push against societal norms but with fewer sex scenes this time around. Not that you aren't valid for that, this is just personal preference. The end. Go make a zine everybody.

[aroaessidhe]

aro & ace books: m/m adult/NA

Cupid Calling - romance - 1/2 MCs is demisexual

After The Dragons - sff novella - ace-spec MC

The Charm Offensive - romance - 1/2 MCs is demisexual

From The Dark We Came - fantasy novella - demisexual MC

The Reanimator’s Heart - historical paranormal - 1/2 MCs is demisexual

How To Sell Your Blood and Fall In Love - urban fantasy - 1/2 MCs is demisexual/greyaro

The Circus Infinite - sci-fi - ace MC

The Perfect Assassin - fantasy - ace MC

Of The Wild - fantasy - ace MC

The One And The Other - low fantasy - ace MC

Never Been Kissed - romance - demisexual MC

Stake Sauce - paranormal - greyaroace MC

More Than Enough - fairytale - two ace mlm MCs

The Trouble - contemporary - aro gay MC

#aspec books / aspec database / tumblr masterpost

[aspecpplarebeautiful]

question.. asexual people are queer, right? i saw a post on twitter and so manyyyyy people said we are not.

It's important to remember bigots are loud. But most surveys show that when lgbtqia+ people are polled, the vast majority consider ace to be a queer identity, most queer and LGBTQIA+ spaces are actively ace inclusive and anti gatekeeping, and frankly asexuality is not heterosexuality.

It can definitely be stressful and upsetting seeing a lot of people invalidate your identity and exclude you like that. Before they all moved to twitter, these people used to be really active on Tumblr (and are actually the reason I made this blog), and they're upsetting on purpose. They also use multiple blogs and tend to be extremely active to give the impression of numbers, but you won't see a lot of them in less bigoted and more moderated spaces. I'm sorry you came across it. You're the only one who gets to decide if queer is a good label for you or not.

All the best and take care, Anon!