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cleverpaws · 4 months ago

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rolan for the character thang ...!!!

yayyy!!!

how i feel abt this character: i lauve rolan so super much!!!! out of the three of them i think abt him the least but thats just bc im obsessed w kian and also rand as a character just hits a little too close to home (eldest siblings when there is an eldest sibling in media 🙁😦) but like. the fact that theres no way of saying who the "real" rolan is. it is also slightly frightening the degree to which i can relate being changed into a Literal entirely new person by a traumatic event /system 😔

all the people i ship romantically w this character: kian & rand (sometimes separately w just kian but mostly all 3 together) (im not much of a keeperschampion guy bc i think its just a little too obvious. yk)

my non-romantic OTP for this character: honestly tho speaking of keeperschampion. those two. as best friends they are also deeply tragic

my unpopular opinion abt this character: something my beloved mutual plantboiart pointed out to me so credit to them but guyssss guyssssssss he wasnt always (that) lameeeee he used to be cool w the other two and steal shit

and finally one thing i wish had happened to him in canon: i think we all know this one i wish his stupid gay bug ass lived 🙁🙁 fly high rolan deep u wouldve loved . the law

#i am back briefly from doing lots of things now hello thank u for this it was super duper fun 🔥🔥#bitb spoilers #as usual. 4 my mutual #asks

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lavernius · 2 months ago

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Locus and Lopez vs. dehumanization and seeing your own humanity through someone else

AKA 1.5k words worth of me trying to justify a random pairing I've been trying to sell people on for 5 years. Feat. a lot of my own introspection on both characters, CW for mentions of abuse.

It's kind of easy to assume that Locpez as a ship only exists because Locus is one of the few people who understands Lopez and one of even fewer who has had an actual (off-screen) conversation with him with full mutual fluency, especially since they interact directly, like, twice in canon (Objects In Space and the "Holy shit he's bilingual" scene from The Federal Army of Chorus). To be honest, that was my initial reason for shoving them together whenever I got into RVB and there was literally no content for them because no one was really considering them together in any capacity but a brief, funny passing interaction.

I do think language is an inherent motivator in their relationship with each other. It's a catalyst. Spanish, of course, is perhaps the most obvious thing they share--Locus being a Latino man and Lopez being the same in a convoluted and meta-racist metaphor. Beggars, choosers: anyone who knows how I operate knows I lean into reclaiming their depictions for my own brown person machinations. For Lopez it's the beauty of meeting someone who not only understands him, but isn't going to belittle him for the language he speaks or imply it'd be easier if he learned English. Locus will just listen to him talk and respond without commenting on the language barrier; Lopez isn't exotic or abnormal or "broken" for it, he just speaks Spanish, big deal, Locus speaks it too.

For Locus, it leans more toward reminding him of who he used to be when he was a simpler and kinder person. His culture seems like a forgone part of himself in many ways, but even if only because he's so distant from his humanity that he doesn't remember HOW to embrace his culture, or what the point of cultural pride even is. Lopez is like, reverse culture shock for him, where Locus is very familiar with Spanish as a language--grew up with it, learned it young, whatever, he canonically understands it and given he's Latino it's easy to assume it could be his native language--but has divorced himself from it so much to be malleable to his abusers that hearing someone speak it so unabashedly feels new. It's the lack of it that makes it so foreign, but it's so ingrained into him that it's easy for him to just slip back into it.

And Lopez being so stubbornly proud of what he is plays into that language dynamic, yes--now that there's someone who will listen and not judge, he has room to be adamant and own his monolingualism, and having someone as aggressively, straightforwardly prideful as Lopez forces Locus to recognize the beauty in the language too--but it applies on a grander scale, which is what I suppose the point of this post is: Locus and Lopez don't just share Spanish, but also histories of abuse and dehumanization, of being overlooked as living, thinking things in favor of taking advantage of their skills. And the results of this abuse manifest differently in both of them, but they're alike in just enough ways that their differences stimulate each other into bettering themselves and reflecting on what makes them, dramatic pause, human.

Some of Lopez and Locus's defining personality traits to me are their shared low empathy (forcibly learned on both of their parts) and the way they feel so alien in any group they're a part of. They're people with a lot of potential who don't care how others see them (at their worst, especially in Locus's case), but are limited by someone who only sees them for their usefulness (Sarge, Felix) and doesn't truly see them as a person. Lopez may be a Red, but they don't really care about anything he says, so he's just a wrench to them. Locus has Felix, but he doesn't recognize that Felix has one-sided power over him and is keeping him on a short leash; he's a shield and a weapon. They're tools, they don't have feelings, and if they realize as much it's a fault in their programming, they can and have to be steered back into place.

They're reflective of each other in this way. However, they're not identical in disposition: Locus resigns very easily to what he's told to be. He had more hope once, made attempts to be humanitarian, but was swiftly taught that kindness is suicide and that the point is to survive, no matter the cost. It was easy for Felix to take advantage of him by saying they needed each other when Locus was at his worst, because having kindness ripped out of him gave Locus little else to rely on but his hands. Locus has no room for questions, because a rulebook is absolute. It takes a reminder of what he used to be to make him falter, but even when Santa is showing him one of the inciting incidents of his "soldier" mindset, Locus can't stop himself from resigning to the mindlessness that Felix and the UNSC have already taught him.

Lopez feels trapped and is hyper-aware of it. He'll listen, but only because there's nothing else in the world for him. He's subservient but not in the same way Locus is, because he's angry about his situation: he knows it's not fair, but what can he fucking do about it? He was made to be Red Team's mechanic, and every word he says falls on deaf ears. He carries this self-awareness like a shield, like a threat: he could do something, but there's no point because his nature as a robot defines him. All he has is a sharp tongue and his hands, and the Reds only need one of those things from him. He revels in being able to complain and reminds himself that he's meant for something greater, but he's so fatalistic that he won't take action.

The balance comes from this anger. They're so alike in how they see the world and how much life has mistreated them, but they don't fully understand each other despite it. Locus sees Lopez as privileged for having a team because Locus has never had people to belong with, but he doesn't understand that Red Team isn't a safe place for Lopez. Lopez thinks Locus is misguided for letting himself believe he could ever be reduced to a mindless weapon, because Lopez has only ever been an object and Locus can't comprehend what that's really like. They see each other for their imperfections first and foremost and it frustrates them mutually: "You could've fixed this sooner, you could've escaped the grief, why didn't you try?"

It's this back-and-forth that they both need in order to reflect on themselves. They're harsh people who don't want to be coddled and admonished, but they're not making forward motion on their own because they're both stubborn and tend to decathect before they even recognize they CAN feel. They refuse to see themselves as human, but they can only see the humanity in each other, and they're both so alike that it could make them hypocrites. For a robot, Lopez's anger is so potent that it's alive: Locus sees more feeling in him than he's ever felt in his own life. Locus wants to be a weapon so bad, but he doesn't realize an object doesn't have heart the way he does, doesn't mourn the years it spent under someone's thumb, doesn't want to fix itself.

They're both brutally honest and they both need brutal honesty. They get along WELL by nature of being as similar as they are, but they argue so much because they want to understand each other and don't realize they already do. They're mapping details of their reflections. It's great: Locus is so hurt that he can only see the damage he causes, Lopez is difficult to hurt and notoriously good at fixing things. Lopez wants true accountability and retribution and Locus has cultivated complicity and guilt to perfection.

After Felix, Locus needs room to command his own life and put others in place when they overstep his boundaries, but he's scared of becoming Felix, so he also needs an anchor to keep him grounded in reality and reasonable. Lopez has never had real control over his own life before and would kill to have the power to make small choices and do as he wants, but he's a very private person who also needs a lot of space to work. They balance each other out and know the other's limits so well that they can easily go "You're hurting yourself and I'm not going to let you get away with it."

It's about understanding yourself through someone else and vice versa. Realizing that you share so much that if they deserve good, you do too. Reclaiming pain, experiencing freedom, finding support. They will deconstruct each other to the metal and muscles and rebuild one another over and over again, and they'll never get it perfectly right, but they're both going to learn more and more as they go. Flawless navigation of a road you've driven a million times, forward and back, potholes and all.

#locpez #rvb #Don't tag L*lix etc etc.#Hi. Thanks 4 responding to the interest check. This was going to be longer but they cut my mic. Locpez is brown bi4bi tism4tism bunk love.#Addendum because I can't shut up > Locus and Lopez both WANT to be seen as objects. This is a functional cog in the machine because they--#CAN'T see EACH OTHER as objects. It frustrates them. Lopez doesn't want his feelings acknowledged but Locus can't ignore the way that Lopez #feels so strongly. Locus wants to be reducible to function but Lopez only sees a damaged human who's shockingly sensitive. I think one of--#my strongest opinions about Locpez is that they aren't really a sweet or affectionate couple in the usual way. It's complicated but Lopez--#struggles to feel much of ANYTHING (just knows he likes Locus) and Locus is a little bit more of a romantic at his best but more strongly--#--prizes the mental stimulation than anything else. They're an intense couple that scares people off. I mean INTENSE intense. Emotionally--#physically (yep); metaphorically; they're pure mutual fascination. Poking each other like insects under microscopes. I need him because he-#--keeps my mind busy in every possible way. They do need therapy but not because of each other LOL.#logs

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jayzzu · 1 month ago

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Send this to all your favorite moots and pass the pumpkin round! KEEP THE PUMPKIN TRAIN GOING 🎃🖤🎃🖤🎃

got pumpkin'd

#i dont usually repost those mutual chain links text stuff but eh we'll see 4 this one #gourmand #originally meant to be just a lil doodle... got too ahead of myself #ask #my art jumpscare #rain world #the gourmand

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torchickentacos · 26 days ago

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Very rarely I'll (accidentally) find someone who's blocked me on pokemon tumblr, and realistically I know that they probably saw one of my posts too many times and just got sick of seeing it or I simply annoy them or whatever. But part of me really wants to believe that my pokemon anime opinions were just too much for someone. I want to believe that someone saw me say 'The absol scene needed better build-up to justify Drew talking to one of his pokemon like that, it goes against everything we've seen of him imo' or whatever and they just put a hand over their heart, wounded, and clicked the block button while cursing my family for several generations, past and future. I really want to think that I had a lukewarm enough drew opinion that someone blocked me about it

#another option is that I interacted with someone that we're all supposed to be mad at and I didn't know or care about it tbh.#I remember early on in my blog I got an anon that was like #'your mutual stole a fic idea from this other person' and it's like. hm. okay.#1.) too vague. You didn't tell me who it was on either side. just 'my mutual'. What do you expect me to do with this information?#2) this sounds like personal drama that I have no reason to know about. Why would I ostracize someone for something that doesn't involve me #3.) what do you mean by 'stealing'? because the nature of fanfiction centers around derivation.#every writer is stealing to some extent and I'm very big on benefit of the doubt when it comes to that kind of thing.#4.) you being on anon means you're not willing to put your reputation on the statement. so why should I take it seriously if you can't?#5.) I have like 200 mutuals. 75% chance this is about someone I've spoken to twice.#I don't really have a point I guess. just feels like a fun anecdote to share now that the statute of limitations has hopefully expired #my asks are usually great. I love you anons!!! but there have been a couple of ones that make for fun stories lol

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ryusxnka · 7 months ago

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My blog just turned NINE today. It's not old you are.

#;Ooc #Usually i'll make a big thing for it #But not this year #I've neglected it a lot the past year so #It's literally been a decade #I've written this kid #Wrow #Neway.#Not to repeat myself over and over #But i love my mutuals so much #& appreciate them #4 always sticking around #making my days funner #This blog would have perished long ago #if it werent for them n my friends #So thk u all so fucking much #4 everything

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nomairuins · 3 months ago

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i like overthink everything now it makes me feel so dumb. i used 2 be able to just talk 2 ppl but nowadays every single thing im like Is that actually going to make them hate me. Yes probably. and then i just dont respond which makes ppl hate me. this is how it is

#ive been overthinking 1 light and casual mildly funny response to something but im worried itll come off as disrespectful and dismissive And #make me seem stupid and uncaring all at the same time. and also be seen as insulting. but like idt itd be insulting right like. im not #saying what it is so ig for all you guys know im like I mean if i say All your shit suck ball and i hateit kys. <- thats not the thing i was #going to say #like it doesnt matter now the window for response is closed now but i feel stupid bc i shouldve just said it it was light and casual. im so #bad at keeping convos gojng im convinced im not going to survive. In like a light and casual way like in a He will not make it through the #winter joke way. dw. im not going to do anything bc i had One failed interaction. if i was going to do anythjng itd be bc of the 8000000 #other failed interactions. But im not. anyways. it just makes me feel so useless 😭 like i want to respond i want to talk to ppl so bad but #i feel like i mess things up Irreparably every time i speak OR i take too LONG overthinking my response and then i just cant respond bc its #been too long and then its been 3 years and the only messages ive ever sent r my intro message and 1 message 2 years ago that nobody #responded to at all. or the conversation stopped immediately after. and like i used to be better at this i was lkke. talkative in a couple #muts servers like. i talked 2 ppl daily in those servers and i had fun and like. I was an important part of the group and i felt like it #but i just feel like such an outsider for Everything and its literally my fault bc i cant just like. Talk. The explosion. bc im always like #im gonna try im gonna do it this time im gonna get it back im going to finally be Good connor and im going to fix it all and make a Good #solid friend group and ill find HEALTHY LOVE and i wont selfsabotage and ill move out and have a job and ill balance it well and ill start #all my hobbies and ill have a great routine and be so loveable and on top of it and not stressed and content and happy and roll with the #punches and then theres a single hiccup and im like Well fuckinf whatever im going to be an unemployed hermit forever and im going to die b4 #im 25 anyways so Who cares and also im digging a little hole for myself. and its like. AUGHH ik i just have to persevere and overcome but #even saying that feels so stupid its not fucking hard its Talking to ppl. like. i literally if ive ever said a word to you i had to think #avt it and strategize how to respond right even for like. like. it makes it sound like its not genuine it is #like for example i want to say hey i love your art! but then i freak out and im like thats not normal thats like a rly generic comment they #hear that all the time theyll thjnk im being polite and my brains like hrmmm rewrite Your art changed my life. It shaped me. Ill never be #the same. Nad im like ok too far overcorrected go back and the sentence generator is like Your art has colors 💯 like. GOD. WHY IS IT SO #difficult. and then usually i either just dont say anythinf and feel awful abt it 4ever OR i send it on anon and then i spend like 15 #minutes ibsessively slightly tweaking the apelling and capitalization and punctuation to make sure it doesnt seem like its me just in case #it Is the worst possible thing to say but then i see the response and itll be like AWWW TYSM :] THIS MEANS A LOT or whathaveyou and i feel #stupid bc i couldve just Told them this to their face and it wouldve been a good positive interaction we had. but instead i had 2 hide and #tyoe entirely differently so they couldnt sniff me from my typing style. and it soesnt even feel like the thanks is actually 4 me bc i #tweaked the message sm. and it still makes me happy that the oersons hapoy but its like. that couldve been a nice mutual interaction #like not that i need a personal ty i compliment ppl when i Want to compliment ppl and when its genuine yk. i dont do it so i get mutualpoint

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saebaragi · 19 days ago

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not to cringe post on main because this is the most suicidal I ever felt in my life yet, but sometimes when I'm feeling extremely lonely and tumblr sends me a notification that a moot has made a post, I feel a little less alone

#random stuff on my account like usual #cringe posting #this last 4 days been a nightmare #i cried today like i never cried before #loneliness #tumblr mutuals #tumblr moots #moots #mutuals #love my moots

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makedamnsvre · 3 months ago

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recently ive been getting really sick of my neighbors i wish that i had a bunch of money so that i could buy up their houses and only let people i live live near me

#neighbors 1 used to be friends but theyre trumpies and also neglect and borderline abuse their dog #i like river hes not a bad dog but hes not trained well and is a very large and powerful dog and really really wants to kill my cats #and they just let him loose wander in the road wander into other peoples yards and hes trapped me and my mom outside because #he tries to force his way into our house if we try to go back inside of our house and i kinda dont want my cats guts splattered everywhere #neighbors 2 have a fenced in yard with a lab and a husky that they leave outside all of the time in their yard #as far as i know they dont have a dog house or even food and water out there and absolutely no toys and the dogs bark constntly #probably because theyre so bored outside in the hot weather usually without shade and no entertainment they bark at each other #or anyone in the yards of the neighboring houses or they bark at the door begging to be let back inside or bark at the windows #and theyre patriots too they got one of those huge skeletons last halloween and theyve kept it up ever since changing out the spotlight #for holidays which initially i really liked i thought it was funny but then for memorialday/july 4th they dressed in patriotically #and i hate america so . i hate them and how they neglect their dogs #neighbors 3 they are related to the one good neighbor BUT. theyre married (?) and they scream at each other arguing all of the time and #because of the geography of where we live it echos right to our house very loudly and it gives me anxiety and they have a kid or kids #who sometimes cry loudly because they scream yell at each other loudly i kinda hope they (not the kids) go to hell #neighbors 4 i . im not sure if theyre newer here but they also have dogs but so far theyve kept them on leashes i think?#except for that one time where their dog just. walked up to me. idk if they let the dog loose on purpose or if it was accidental #but recently me and my mom were outside messing with the garden and They are also a couple and were screaming at each other #also ! i love straight people 😍 please breakup or get a divorce or move away or go to hell youre fucking crazy people go to therapy #and then theres the people on super loud motorcycles or in super loud cars and then theres the other neighbors with the isra hell flag #and the other neighbors that i SUPER SUPER SUPER HATE and have hated for YEARS ecause i went to school with one and hes #racist as fuck i hope he dies or something. and because of them we dont even go down the road that way #they have free roaming animals that would go into the road and they run some ? atv repair or something out of their house and sometimes #completely occupy the whole road loading shit or something. like if you want stereotypical redneck assholes its them #and i hate all of these people so much. mutuals you should live here instead of them. its the blue ridge mountains its higher altitude #its pretty but sometimes it rains and causes something of a 'creek' to flow but were on a mountain so it flows down and away #and well sometimes the sewer smells really bad for some reason idk but like . its fine dont worry about it #and bears might drag your trashcans up the mountain but just dont leave food outside and they wont do that #we have a . shockingly beautiful ?? dumpster on the road too so its okay 👍#dear lird i just scrolled up and thats a lot of words . o well

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swinging-stars-from-satellites · 1 year ago

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also idk enough about music and how this works to explain it but there's a very specific way Pete Wentz plays bass and it's so fun to single out in a song and listen to it

#it's almost like... stuttered and at the same time melodic #like he plays individual melodic notes a lot and there's kinda this. stuttered rhythm to it #he also plays 3s on a 4 count pretty often which is SUPER fun one of my favorite things #like the song can be a 4/4 meter. but he's playing like it's a 6/8 #or at least that's how it sounds to my (untrained) ear #but yeah. a lot of melodic playing + stuttered rhythms/strumming patterns + he usually cuts loose and plays steadier on the refrain #or last part of a song #idk man it's just fun to try and pinpoint how different people play and bass is always the one I go for so like. yeah #Lu rambles #I'm being embarrassing on main but honestly I just wanna ramble at my established mutuals about stuff tonight I guess #fob #pete

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gorelesbian · 4 months ago

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#i wrote a 4 sentence review instead of the usual 1 sentence so i think you guys should all applaud and become my letterboxd mutual :3 #anyway I'M SO INSANE ABOUT THIS MOVIE AURGH.....so glad to finally have rewatched it #kim.txt

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bustyasianbeautiespod · 6 months ago

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Do you guys have podcast recommendations? I'm caught up on everything I listen to, but you guys are my favorite podcast, so I assume we have similar tastes

AWWW i'm so honored that we're your faves! grey is no longer a podcast listener so i (crystal) shall be the only answerer

in terms of people-watching-a-thing podcasts, i've enjoyed:

doctor huh- two brothers, one a former doctor who watcher and one who... only knows about it from social media... watch nuwho eps in a random order

zero to zero- three friends watch dc/marvel properties and respond w fun and funny levels of haterism. i have enjoyed ALL of this despite never once touching something they reviewed. on maybe-permanent hiatus

LMNOP- the only good cbs elementary podcast. also on maybe-permanent hiatus

i've been meaning to watch that- i've listened to less of this one, but it's hosted by manika dulcio, who we had on our s4 wrapped, so if you liked her there check her out on her home base!

as for fiction podcasts, listing my fave subscribeds below! for some of these, the first few eps are kinda rough but i've found them all resoundingly Worth It eventually! also if you, babpod listener, care about this, all of these have queer main characters and i'll bold the ones where the main char is explicitly a poc:

hi nay- "a supernatural horror fictional podcast about Filipina immigrant Mari Datuin, whose babaylan (shaman) family background accidentally gets her involved in stopping dangerous supernatural events in Toronto." v rich lore v good at being creepy! (ongoing)

the silt verses- what if every single folk deity was real and hungry and society ran on ppl being sacrificed on telephone poles? incredibly sexy writing like SO sexy (ongoing)

midnight burger- space diner adventures and friendships! they recently dropped a 3-hour beautifully audio-engineered season finale they've grown so much since the beginning. great cast and fills you w so much wonder about The Universe (ongoing)

greater boston- an expanding cast of chars tell the story of the forming of a new city on the boston red line train cars. makes u wild about community and interconnectedness and local politics and how no one is beyond compassion while also having like. cheese robots (ongoing)

within the wires- what if a world war led to a worldwide cultural shift that decried all tribalism starting at the family unit and babies were separated from their parents at birth? extremely interesting world and formats though i do think it's kinda tired after s4. i think listening to s1 then reading the companion novel might be the Move (ongoing)

unwell, a midwestern gothic mystery- what it says on the tin! lily returns to the fading small town she grew up in to care for her mom. there are ghosts and town history and wolves in the woods. some rlly beautiful and complex family relationships and friendships, great vibe and sound design (complete)

parkdale haunt- p classic haunted house horror (well i say classic. there's also an influencers cult) which i also consider a Top Friendship-Focused Media (complete)

alice isn't dead- usamerican road trip show about the horrors of freedom. spn wishes. love jasika nicole as a VA (complete)

the pasithea powder- epistolary space bisexuals after a war that left them on opposite sides. excellent interpersonal drama and aliens (complete)

wooden overcoats- v funny british funeral home rivalry show antigone funn is the weirdgirl extraordinaire (complete)

monstrous agonies- nice soothing ten-minute segments of a supernatural advice show. i think i've mentioned it as being the anti-spn in terms of the monster rights and monster-human cohabitation background of the world (complete)

midnight radio- ten-episode small town radio show ghost romance. it's an excellent annual fall listen if you have a saturday free (complete)

mabel podcast- ONE OF THE PODCASTS OF ALL TIME. if you care about women you will like this podcast. i've always found anna and mabel so revolutionary and freeing to listen to. horror podcast about fairies and a house that loves (creepy edition?) you (long hiatus)

brimstone valley mall- silly delightful y2k demons in a mall (long hiatus)

the far meridian- magical realism story about a girl living in a teleporting lighthouse. sweet and melancholic (long hiatus)

khôra podcast- greek myths in space. i need to hug all the characters (long hiatus)

ty for this ask i love podcasts i need to catch up on them!

- Crystal :)

#hope this is a helpful list! idk what pods you usually listen to i hope this list isn't like. sooo basic #i feel like ppl's relationships to fiction pods are like 1. what's that? -> 2. only magnus archives and night vale ->#3. a nice portfolio (where i'm at i think. i've been here like 8 years i think) -> 4. Knows Every Single One (my cool mutuals)#i also hope you aren't a fully nonfiction pod listener this would be so unhelpful if so #asks

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mejomonster · 1 year ago

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I haven't seen the new episodes yet. But from what I can gather this show is wish fulfillment and I'm quite excited that from what I've heard so far the plot is going like. The Most ideal way i would have hoped for it to be written